← The Spiritual Hustler
The Spiritual Hustler
Unlocking Healthy Conflict: How Women Can Rise Together Through Rupture & Repair
00:15:27
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- [00:00]
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Welcome to the Spiritual Hustler Podcast. I'm your host, Jessica Zweig, multi seven figure serial entrepreneur, best selling author and branding and business coach. And this is a show where we are redefining the word hustle. Reclaiming our true feminine nature of magnetism and putting down the self judgments and shame around loving to work and making a lot of money at it. On this show you're going to learn how to stop hustling and start spiritually hustling. By pressing play, you are now part of a new movement of women who don't hustle for money. We hustle for meaning. We don't hustle from lack. We hustle for love. We don't hustle from survival. We hustle for humanity's thriving. We hustle toward healing the ancestral programming of fear and step into a new understanding of safety in the body to receive this shift isn't going to only heal your life. It's going to make you a whole lot richer too.
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This is the Spiritual Hustler Podcast. Well, hello my beautiful spiritual hustlers and welcome back to the podcast. I'm your host, Jessica Zweig. I'm so happy to be here with you guys each and every episode, week to week. This show is my soul. You all are such a gorgeous part of my life. Every day I get up and I hit record and I get to pour into your evolution, your expansion, your elevation into your highest timeline. And we do that on the Spiritual Hustler podcast by unpacking this exact phrase. What it means to be spiritual and what it means to be a hustler. And most importantly, what activates with inside of us when we combine that identity into one as women in business, on this planet who are hustling to make an impact, make more money, to have an abundant life, a beautiful lifestyle, dreams that come true, while also being deeply, deeply connected to our mission, to spirit, to purpose, to a better future beyond our own personal timelines. And I'm so happy you're here. Every single Thursday, we drop an unlocking episode where I take a little tiny key off of my keychain that has been working for me as I unlock all of my own locks when it comes to worth and abundance and female friendship and a healthy body and successful relationships. And I want to talk about something today that I feel all of us are on a continuum with. There's no destination when it comes to this topic. It is a hundred percent a journey that is going to continually test us and arise in our lives. The deeper we go in relationship with people as we step forward into our own authentic truth and really understand our own value and our own beliefs and our own identities. And that is understanding how to navigate not just conflict, but healthy conflict. Because I don't know about you guys, but I'm like the least confrontational person. I really been conflict avoidant a lot of my life. And as I have done my spiritual work, my personal growth and development, as I have become more of an activated woman in business, I have had to learn how to grow this muscle. I've had, unfortunately, relationships in business and in friendship. And if we are women who are working alongside people that we love and get along with initially, sometimes those relationships are mixed. Like we do business with friends, we do business with women that we have been on a journey with, that we obviously have a personal connection to because we're heart centered people and we want to work with people we love. And that's typically how it starts. And yet when it comes to conflict in those relationships, I've seen time and time again relationships end when they didn't necessarily need to. Now I know that there's circumstances where relationships become toxic and abusive and completely unhealthy and boundaries must be drawn and relationships need to dissolve in order for us to continue on our path and only surround ourselves with people who support us and understand us and respect us. But I really believe that those are often exceptions to the rule and that we cut relationship evolution off at the pass because we're too uncomfortable handling conflict. And if you're going to play big, okay, and be a woman in her power, you're going to have to, one, accept that you might ruffle feathers at times, two, that you're going to trigger people that might not fully understand your perspective. And three, it just comes with the territory of being a powerful woman who has a, an opinion, who has her own perspective and way of doing things and seeing the world. And instead of that being a bad thing or a threatening thing, it can be a vehicle to alchemize deeper relationships. When we're willing to lean in to conflict to people not understanding how we see it and being okay with having differences. And there's this mantra that I want you to start to hold because it's going to flex you and expand you, not just in this singular relationship, but in how you move through the world. And that's this theory that you can disagree with somebody and still be friends. And I'm not necessarily even talking about the big stuff like politics, which we could all actually take a page from honestly, but also just every day in micro moments where we just don't see eye to eye with people. And one of the biggest fucking unlocks that I have adopted, that has really, really changed my life that I'm here to really impart onto you today is the singular concept of connect and clear. So a lot of us, because we're conflict avoidant, whether we're conscious of it or not, something will sting us or something won't sit right, or something will piss us off and we'll just not say anything. We'll hold it and we'll carry it and it'll grow and it'll become this thing that weighs on us, that builds within us, that creates resentment, that creates these what I call death by a thousand paper cuts if we don't allow it to come to the surface and to speak it and to deal with it in real time. And I adopted this philosophy in my business, simply be agency. And it was hard, it wasn't something that everyone felt comfortable with because we all have different ways of dealing with our own hurt. Some people need to retreat, some people need quiet time to process, some people need to go within and other people need to deal with it by over communicating in the moment. And they're really extreme ways of dealing with conflict. But I love this theory of connecting and clearing because it's sort of this surrender on both sides to say if you're the conflict avoidant person and instead of locking down and not coming up to the surface and speaking your truth in that moment because it's uncomfortable, this theory of simply connecting, like connecting is a soft vibration that allows you to hold your own experience with a bit more, more sovereignty than you might know you have. And on the flip side, if you're somebody that is super, super communicative and needs to just address it and go all the way in in real time, which can feel kind of abrupt and harsh and overbearing to the person on the other side just meeting the moment or the situation with the word connect. Let's connect. And the real true upgrade is if you can do it in real time. And then once you've connected, you've agreed to have a conversation to clear it. And we only clear it by moving through the discomfort of speaking our truth and getting it out. And if we can really speak what is real for us in that moment of real time connection, we alchemize it. It doesn't have space to fester, it doesn't have room to become toxic and spill over into a story and a projection. And as Brene Brown would say, A shitty rough draft in your brain, but an actual truth moment where you speak your piece and he or she speaks theirs, and you lay it out on the table and you're able to alchemize it. So let me give you a real example of this. I actually had a moment of dissonance with somebody I am very, very close to, and I brought something to her that she didn't align with. And she shared with me immediately that it didn't align. And I was upset and surprised by that fact. And I could have sat with it and said, you know, I just need a minute. This was unexpected. I need time to process this. And instead, I responded within five minutes in a voice note expressing my truth. And I did it with love. And I started by saying, I just want you to know that our relationship and our friendship is more important to me than this misunderstanding, but this is how I see it. And I sent it off and she responded right back and said, thank you so much for sharing this. It's clear we're not on the same page. I would love to have a real time conversation. And I was asking for a real time conversation as well. And we just simply needed to get our thoughts out on the table to connect and clear it. And we were able to come through that situation so quickly. And honestly, at one point, my friend says to me, you know, I'm really proud of us. This is really dope that two women who have done their work can be in disagreement and navigate it together. And who we became on the other side of that conflict, because it would have turned into a fight. It would have turned into a big disagreement. It could have been this situation. Instead, it was a heart to heart. An uncomfortable heart to heart. A heart to heart. And I really looked back on that situation and was so clear that healthy conflict is a good thing. It keeps us in relationship with people. I know I talk a lot about sisterhood on this podcast and in my platform on Instagram and in my book, the Light Work and all of my retreats and inside of my community at Feminine Frequency business school. And sisterhood is a code. It isn't just this beautiful etheric frequency of women loving each other all the time. It's actually a medicine. And medicine isn't here to necessarily nourish us as much as it is to help us heal. And when we are willing to move through uncomfortable conversations, uncomfortable moments, uncomfortable arguments, and still lean all the way in and own our own shadow and projection, as much as we stand in what we believe in, we can meet not Only a new relationship, a new version of a relationship. But we meet a whole new part of ourselves, a whole new possibility for our capacity and our identity to be a woman who can be in relationship with other women for real. Because it's not always going to be sunshine and rainbows and braiding each other's hair and supporting each other on Instagram and rooting for one another with absolutely no story behind it or attachment. It can be sticky. It can be challenging. And this is why conflict is healthy. Because it brings to the surface who we're able to be beyond our own perception only if we are willing to truly connect and clear. And so this is the unlock today. I hope that you look around your relationships and ask yourself, where have I avoided and shut down and cut someone off at the past simply because it was safer and easier versus standing in your truth while also creating space to hear someone else's. Because that, my friend, is the upgrade. It is the activation into more light when you can hold the dark. And I believe that if we could just simply have conversations with each other, I really believe this is something I believed in for basically my whole entire life, that there isn't a single situation. And I'm talking about you getting crunchy with a friend to like war. I'm not exaggerating that a face to face, heart to heart conversation couldn't solve. And I hope that you look through your relationships with that lens starting today. Because if we really understood the power of healthy conflict and built it as a muscle, we wouldn't just change our own lives, we would heal the whole world. And it starts with you. So I hope that today's unlock maybe unlocked a rather potentially sticky door and opened up some new space to show up as a woman who isn't just saying she is living her life, but is being the example of that in action. All right, my beautiful sisters, spiritual hustlers, lightworker, women of the new earth. Hope you have a beautiful week and I will see you on the next episode of the Spiritual Hustler podcast. Bye, guys. It.