Hannah Brown: Writing Her Next Chapter

Summary

The Squeeze Podcast Episode Summary: Hannah Brown – Writing Her Next Chapter

Release Date: June 25, 2025
Host: Taylor Lautner
Guest: Hannah Brown

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Welcome and Early Updates [00:00 – 15:17]

In this engaging episode of The Squeeze, hosts Taylor Lautner and her husband Adam Lautner welcome back their first guest, Hannah Brown. The conversation kicks off with excitement as Taylor shares the surprising news: Hannah will be joining the cast of Bachelor in Paradise. Hannah expresses her equal surprise and enthusiasm, stating, “I'm honestly just as shocked as you are” (00:22).

The discussion quickly shifts to Hannah and Adam’s living arrangements. Hannah explains their decision to live separately before their upcoming wedding, highlighting the importance of intentional space in strengthening their relationship. She emphasizes the value of couples therapy, noting, “Somebody that is both of your cheerleader and your cheerleader to be together, genuinely” (00:48).

Wedding Planning and Personal Growth [06:15 – 11:03]

Hannah delves into the complexities of wedding planning, sharing the stress of balancing the release of her new book with her wedding preparations. She admits, “It has been a little stressful” (06:15), but remains optimistic about the beautiful outcome. Both hosts discuss the challenges of organizing an international wedding, particularly the logistical hurdles posed by time zone differences.

Hannah reflects on the profound growth she and Adam have experienced over the past two years. She shares her anticipation for their wedding day, highlighting the deep commitment she feels: “I've grown so much this past, like, I would say two years... and just, like, have that covenant together” (09:07). Taylor echoes this sentiment, emphasizing the importance of viewing marriage as a lifelong commitment rather than a temporary arrangement.

Mental Health Journey and Therapeutic Practices [22:41 – 43:00]

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to Hannah's mental health journey. She discusses her recent experience with neurofeedback and EMDR therapy, explaining how these methods have helped her address depression and anxiety. Hannah shares, “I've learned how to rewire my brain is something I'm really passionate about right now” (23:15).

She details her sessions with Dr. Amen, describing the process of brain mapping and how it has provided her with insights into her mental state. Despite finding some aspects challenging, Hannah acknowledges the benefits: “I've learned so much and have been able to really, like, have so many breakthrough sessions lately” (26:53). Adam adds his perspective, mentioning his own experiences with neurofeedback, which further enriches the conversation on mental wellness.

Relationship Dynamics and Healing Together [15:17 – 43:00]

Hannah opens up about the decision to live apart from Adam, attributing it to their shared faith and the desire to grow individually while preparing for marriage. She explains, “We see each other every day... it has been really good for us” (17:34). This intentional separation has allowed them to set clear values and intentions for their relationship, fostering a deeper connection.

The couple discusses the benefits of shared therapy, emphasizing how having a joint therapist has strengthened their bond. Hannah highlights the importance of having someone who understands both of them and can mediate effectively: “Having somebody invested in both of our lives and in our relationship... it is so cool” (42:52). Taylor and Adam agree, sharing their own experiences with couples therapy and the positive impact it has had on their relationship.

Creative Endeavors and Writing Romance Novels [46:07 – 63:00]

Transitioning to her creative pursuits, Hannah discusses her passion for writing fiction, particularly romance novels. She recounts her journey from aspiring writer to a published author, inspired by her experiences in the Bachelor franchise. Hannah shares, “Writing these romance novels has been like my first actual dream come true” (46:42), and elaborates on how her personal love story has influenced her storytelling.

Her latest book, The Four Engagement Rings of Civil Rain, addresses unanswered questions from her first novel and provides closure to readers. Hannah emphasizes the therapeutic aspect of writing, stating, “When you write, it’s like unraveling as I wrote, which was super cathartic” (51:13). She credits her co-author, Emily Larrabee, and her supportive editorial team for making the process manageable and enjoyable.

Upcoming Participation in Bachelor in Paradise [53:24 – 56:16]

Towards the end of the episode, Hannah reveals details about her role in Bachelor in Paradise. Although she won't be one of the suitors, she will serve as an advisor and contribute to the show's dynamic by “popping some bottles of champagne” (53:27). She views this opportunity as a redemptive experience, aiming to help couples foster love with the wisdom she has gained: “My hope is that I can really, like, help foster that opportunity for love for people” (55:35).

Taylor praises Hannah's suitability for the role, highlighting her blend of fun and wisdom. Hannah appreciates the support, noting her ability to offer insightful advice while maintaining her authentic self: “You are the perfect amount of, like, fun, but also you give great advice” (55:42).

Rapid Fire Segment [56:07 – 63:00]

The episode concludes with a rapid-fire segment where Hannah answers personal questions, providing listeners with deeper insights into her personality and mental health:

1. Favorite Movie or Song Title Describing Mental Health: Hannah struggled to pinpoint a title, indicating her ongoing journey.

2. Openness When Struggling: She acknowledges improvement, stating, “I'm trying to get better” (57:32).

3. Three Social Media Accounts to Follow: Hannah lists Heather Man for humor, her therapist for mental health tips, and Dr. Amen for brain health insights (58:12).

4. Favorite Form of Self-Care: Enjoying walks in her walkable Nashville neighborhood and watching Gilmore Girls (59:02).

5. Most Misunderstood Aspect: Hannah explains that she may come off as cold because she only lets a few people in deeply, but she thrives in meaningful conversations (59:46).

6. Most Positive Impact on Mental Health: Her fiancé, Adam, who has stretched her perspectives and supported her growth (61:57).

7. Moment to Revisit: Hannah reflects on overcoming childhood fears of creativity and failure, now finding healing and joy in writing (63:00).

Closing Thoughts [63:38 – End]

In her final reflections, Hannah expresses a sense of peace and acceptance with her current self, recognizing that she doesn’t need to have all the answers. She emphasizes the importance of sharing her experiences to help others: “I can share that and that's enough” (64:17). Taylor and Adam commend her growth, wrapping up the episode on a hopeful and supportive note.

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Notable Quotes

• Hannah Brown:

  • “Somebody that is both of your cheerleader and your cheerleader to be together, genuinely.” (00:48)
  • “I've grown so much this past, like, I would say two years... and just, like, have that covenant together.” (09:07)
  • “Writing these romance novels has been like my first actual dream come true.” (46:42)
  • “My hope is that I can really, like, help foster that opportunity for love for people.” (55:35)
  • “I can share that and that's enough.” (64:17)

• Taylor Lautner:

  • “You're the perfect amount of, like, fun, but also you give great advice.” (55:42)

• Adam Lautner:

  • “Hannah, you gave us a really good analogy of the scary closet, too, which is a big thing that I feel like we've carried throughout this podcast, too.” (02:05)

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Conclusion

This episode of The Squeeze offers a heartfelt and comprehensive look into Hannah Brown's personal growth, mental health journey, and creative endeavors. Through candid discussions and insightful exchanges, listeners gain a deeper understanding of the challenges and triumphs that shape Hannah's path. Her honest reflections on therapy, relationship dynamics, and the therapeutic power of writing provide valuable lessons for anyone navigating similar experiences. As Hannah prepares to embark on her role in Bachelor in Paradise, her story serves as an inspiring testament to resilience and the transformative power of self-care.

Transcript

[Hannah]

The following podcast is a Dear Media production.

[Taylor]

Hannah, welcome back to the Squeeze.

[Hannah]

I'm so excited to be here.

[Taylor]

Hannah was our first guest, Literally our third episode. I had this. I can't believe I'm actually saying this. I literally was just told this morning that you're going to paradise.

[Hannah]

Yeah, I am going to be a part of Bachelor in Paradise.

[Taylor]

Tell me everything about this.

[Hannah]

I'm honestly just as shocked as you are.

[Taylor]

Wait, are you and Adam living apart?

[Hannah]

So we bought a house. We decided, like, hey, we only have a few more months before we get mar married financially. It was something that we had to think about. Just what other people were gonna think was really hard. This is why I'm, like, such a proponent of, like, couples therapy. Somebody that is both of your cheerleader and your cheerleader to be together, genuinely.

[Taylor]

Love me and want the best.

[Hannah]

And they're gonna call you out when you're acting crazy.

[Taylor]

Now you're literally writing fiction books. Where did this idea come from?

[Hannah]

I got to experience my romantic life for millions of people to see. I thought it would be really cool to be able to give them other love stories to root for. And it answers all those questions that readers were like, what? Where the heck did she go? Or what's wrong with her?

[Taylor]

I'm scared for 10. Hannah, welcome back to the Squeeze.

[Hannah]

I'm so excited to be here.

[Taylor]

This is so fun. I was just watching. So there's a lot of new lemon drops. That's what we've named our listeners. Oh, I love that since you've last been here. But Hannah was our first guest, Literally our third episode. She came in, and Taylor and I had no clue what we were doing, but we did it, and it was fun. I actually watched it back, and it was sweet. I feel like we were just, like, hanging out.

[Hannah]

I'm honored that I was the first guest, because I feel like y' all have just really had just beautiful conversations since then, too. And it's been really cool to see y' all grow. And to know that I was a small part of it at the very beginning was really cool.

[Taylor]

No, I feel like you. You gave us a really good analogy of the scary closet, too, which is a big thing that I feel like we've carried throughout this podcast, too.

[Hannah]

Oh, I love that.

[Taylor]

It's fun. We did this before, and we did it again. I got a new jar. So this little jar is a game called Citrus Got Real. If you want to pull a little piece of paper out of there.

[Hannah]

I don't think it was called Was it always called.

[Taylor]

I don't know, actually.

[Hannah]

That's a good name.

[Taylor]

Thank you. Thank you. Okay, we love a good. A good little lemon pun.

[Hannah]

What's the weirdest thing you believed as a kid?

[Taylor]

Oh, gosh. Okay, wait. I have one, and it's actually kind of embarrassing. Oh, I have, like, insane. But, like, channel your, like, inner child. I had this. I can't believe I'm actually saying this. I had this crazy fear that. You know, like, the automatic toilets, like.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

You know, like, in public, when you stand up. I used to think that there was, like, little, like, elves in there or, like, little creatures that would, like, flush the toilet, and I thought that they would see me naked, so I'd always pull up my pants really quick. That's literally, like, my mind. Until I was probably, like, 12, I was like, someone's, like, watching me.

[Hannah]

I love that. That makes sense.

[Taylor]

Like, it's crazy.

[Hannah]

It's like, how does it happen? And it always goes off at random times.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

I had a very big imagination as a child, so I feel like that's on brand for me. But saying it out loud, it's, like, literally insane. I literally thought someone could, like, see me naked, so I'd, like, jump up quick.

[Hannah]

I mean, did y' all. Did you not think that, like, all your dolls, like, were doing stuff when you left the room? Because I definitely did.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

I definitely had that thought.

[Hannah]

But that's also because we grew up with Toy Story.

[Taylor]

I think I was literally just gonna say I had a Jesse doll, and that was, like, I definitely thought she was.

[Hannah]

I had one of those weird. My twin dolls. Did you have one of those?

[Taylor]

I don't think I did.

[Hannah]

Okay. I swear mine was possessed because it would just go off in the middle of the day or at night. And I was like, this doll, like, hates me. I was so scared. I would, like, put it in the. The garage, and my mom would bring it back in. I'm like, no, there's something wrong with that. That My twin doll. So I really do think there was something going on while it was gone with that dollar. Do I answer this, too?

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Taylor]

I mean, that can be your answer if you don't have anything else.

[Hannah]

Oh, no, I have a. Actually really weird.

[Taylor]

You're like, oh, no, I got one.

[Hannah]

So I also blame my dad for this because he told us this was, like, a thing. But I grew up in Alabama. I didn't grow up in, like, a neighborhood. So we. We're, like, on seven acres, and whenever he wanted us to get inside he'd be like. When it was getting later at night, he'd be like, you have to get inside. The wampus cat is going to be out. And I believed this wampus cat thing until I was 14 years old and I finally realized he was like, it wasn't a real thing. So I thought it was, like this big, scary, like, not mountain lion, like, some type of. Like a.

[Taylor]

Some creature.

[Hannah]

Some type of creature that was, like, out in our yard. And I would run out to the car and run back in at night because I was scared of the wampus cat. And I did not know that my dad had been, like, lying to us about this until I was 14 years old. And it, like, it was like my adult brain, like, shifted on. I was like.

[Taylor]

The frontal lobe started to develop a little more. Oh, my gosh.

[Hannah]

But, like, was truly terrified to go outside at night, and he would, like, make sounds. I didn't know it was him. Like, it was.

[Taylor]

Was this just, like, a joke for him or was he like, I don't want my kids going out?

[Hannah]

No, it was just a joke. That's stuff my dad does. Like, he just tries to. I mean, he has made my mom believe, like, crazy things because he just, like, goes on with his bit for far too long.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

So, yeah, I believe that there was some, like, mythical, scary creature outside.

[Taylor]

That is so good. Oh, my gosh. I love that. Okay, well, I'm excited to chat all things life updates. It's kind of crazy to watch back, like, your first episode of things you were doing then versus now. But I kind of want to start with wedding stuff because I just like, where are you at in wedding planning? How's it going? Was it everything you hoped and dreamed, or is it a lot?

[Hannah]

Okay. I don't know if I love this season of wedding planning. I am not the most organized. I would not say, like, I am a planner in general, and thank goodness I have, like, wonderful wedding planners that that's their job and they do it. But it has been a little stressful. We have a lot going on. My book comes out one month before I get married, and then I guess I can say this now. I'm gonna be out on the beach for Bachelor in Paradise.

[Taylor]

I'm gonna be asking you about that.

[Hannah]

For a month later. So my schedule before the wedding is a little crazy, and it's all kind of happened very quickly, so that has been hard for me, just trying to balance it all. But I am so excited. I'm so excited for it to be here. But I don't think I enjoy.

[Taylor]

Yeah. The.

[Hannah]

All the little details. Like, I. Maybe I thought I would.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

What about you? Did you like that part?

[Taylor]

I liked some parts of it, yes. Well, I mean, yeah, we had a wedding planner, and they were amazing, so like, could not have done it without them. But, yeah, it's definitely, like, there's fun stuff, but then there's also, like, logistics. And then it's like, we're doing international wedding. Gosh.

[Hannah]

And that is what's so hard.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I thought it was going to be easier in some way.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But the logistics is really tough in trying to communicate with people.

[Taylor]

Even just the time change.

[Hannah]

The time change, it's hard to get responses back and to know exactly what's happening. So that's been a little challenging, but I know it's going to be beautiful.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Once we're there, I have, like, full faith in that.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But the travel and all those things, it can be really hard navigating, corralling my group and being like, okay, what's going on? Does everybody have their plane tickets booked, hotels booked? But it's going to be really wonderful. Like, truly, last week is when I was like, oh, my gosh, this is happening. Like, not that this is happening, but, like, it's all starting to, like, come together.

[Taylor]

Yeah.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Oh, it's such a good. It's such a good feeling.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

What are you, like, most excited for? Is there, like, it could be, like, a little detail or, like, I mean, it could be wearing your dress. Like, is there just something that you're like, oh, like, this makes me excited. You're, like, everything it to be over, really.

[Hannah]

Just, like, being there with. I know, like, this is so cliche to say, but, like, seeing all the people that love us and have been a part of our journey, whether that was growing up separately, you know, in our childhood, but also the people who have, like, just seen our love story and have been there to support us and encourage us. Like, that is what I'm so excited about, to have people around us that just, like, feel that love.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I think just. I've talked about this a little bit, but, like, commitment has been really hard for me. And of course, marriage is, like, one of the biggest commitments you'll have in your life. And I have grown so much this past, like, I would say two years. And to fully, like, be there and be, like, have that covenant.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Together. I think it feels like it's gonna just be like, that moment of, like, breath of, like, we've We've done this, and I'm just ready for that moment. Like, the anticipation, I think, is. Is hard that engagement season. So I'm just ready for that moment of like. I do. Yeah, I think that'll be really special.

[Taylor]

I mean, it's so great that you, like, look at it that way because I feel like so often people are just like, I'm not gonna say quick to get married, but our divorce rates are so high. And like, I. I kind of feel like people not viewing marriage as like, you know, as a forever thing because, like, obviously you can get out, but, like, going into a marriage, that shouldn't be like, what you're thinking about. Like, it should be like, hey, we're actually going to do this forever. And this is how I'm viewing this, and we're going to work through whatever and all that stuff. So I think it's cool that you're looking at it like that.

[Hannah]

Definitely done that. Yeah, I just. I do. I think it's a really big deal. And like, I. That's why I say, like, anticipation season is almost hard for me because you can start to be anxious about every little thing with wedding planning, with just.

[Taylor]

Are.

[Hannah]

Are we the most connected we have ever been in this moment? Because we're about to do this thing and like, I will. I would say we actually are, which is awesome. But yeah, I'm just so ready for that moment of like, sign still delivered.

[Taylor]

Yeah, it's.

[Hannah]

It's us. So, yeah, I'm ready for that.

[Taylor]

Okay. Lemon drops, I have some exciting news for you. Simply has launched a new prebiotic soda called Simply Pop. The new Juicy Soda. This new Juicy soda comes in five flavors. They have pineapple, mango, lime, strawberry, Citrus punch and fruit punch. Simply Pop is the new fruit forward bevy of prebiotic sodas made with 6 grams of prebiotic fiber and to support gut health and vitamin C and zinc to support immune health. Something that I love about this new Simply Pop is there is no added sugar. So many of these drinks add sugar, but you're getting an amazing taste with no added sugar. I love a little two, 3pm a little treat. Just a little something for me. And Simply Pop has been that go to for me. I would say my favorite flavor is either the lime. I am such a lime girl through and through. But also the fruit punch is pretty good. But I'm. I'm torn between those. Don't make me pick one, because I can't pick. But you guys need to try Simply Pop out. It is so yummy. You can find Simply Pop and any of its five juicy flavors by visiting them online at cokeurl.com simply pop that's C-O k e u r l dot com s I m p l y pop. You guys need to check out Simply Pop. It's going to be your new favorite. We talk a lot about self care on the squeeze, but one powerful aspect of self care that deserves a little more attention is self acceptance. Self acceptance is the act of fully embracing both your strengths and weaknesses without judgment. When you embrace your strengths and your weaknesses, we feel more accepted by ourselves and also by others. One great way to feel accepted financially is with discovery. That's because Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. That percentage is based on the February 2025 Nielsen report, which means acceptance at 99% of businesses like yoga studios and juice bars. There's a good chance that you'll feel stronger with the improved flexibility of yoga and the boosted immune system of juice and more strength certainly helps when it comes to embracing both your strengths and weaknesses. And thanks to Discover's Cash Back Match, Discover will automatically double all the cash back you've earned on your credit card at the end of your first year. And there's no limit on how much they'll match. So get out there, be accepted, double up on the cash back you earn at the end of your first year and maybe use it towards even more self care. It pays to discover see [e-mail] credit card this episode is brought to you by Opill, the first over the counter daily birth control pill available in the U.S. did you know that about a third of women face barriers to accessing prescription birth control? Whether it's a struggle of getting an appointment for a prescription, taking time off of work or school, lack of insurance, and not to mention carrying the mental load of it all, women have been facing these barriers head on. But now we can take a breath because with opill, for the first time in US history, no permission is required to access a daily birth control pill. Opill is a daily birth control pill that's FDA approved, full prescription strength and estrogen free. It is 98% effective when used as directed, making it the most effective over the counter birth control available. You can find Opill at most major retailers or online. When I first heard about opill, I cannot tell you guys how excited I was because of all of these struggles that women face. It can be so hard to get birth control and now this is an FDA approved over the counter birth control. I Also love that it's estrogen free. I recently switched to birth control that is estrogen free and I have been loving it for myself. Opill is birth control in your control and you can use code squeeze for 25% off your first month of [e-mail]. that's code squeeze at O P I L L dot com. Check out opill to see if it's right for you. So good. I want to ask you, are you and Adam living apart?

[Hannah]

Yeah, we are.

[Taylor]

Okay, wait, what prompted that? Because I thought I saw that online and I was like, wait, yeah, tell me about that.

[Hannah]

So we had lived together for a while, and it really is like our. Our faith that kind of changed things for us. I. When Adam and I first met, I was really, like, struggling. I was just struggling. I'd had so many cool opportunities, but really had been jaded by love and relationship and kind of how I said, like, I was not looking for anything, like committing my life to someone. And Adam just continued to pursue me. And he, in faith, was. Was still kind of searching. And I had grown up Christian, but I was really just not so sure what I believed anymore. And we've really grown in that way together so much. Like, I have been healing my relationship with the Lord, and he has been discovering his relationship with the Lord. And it has been so cool to see that and to be able to be on that journey together. And we just decided for us at this time, like, we just wanted to pursue the Lord and, like, what does he have for us? And for us, that was the best decision that we were like, you know what? We have a few more months before our wedding. We bought a house. And when we bought the house, we decided like, hey, we only have a few more months before we get married. This could be a really good time for us to, like, have this moment where this is our married house together. So I've been living in the house, he's been living in an apartment. And it's been so great. It's actually, like, made probably, like, the marriage, like, so much more sweet and special, and we're, like, giddy and excited in a way that I don't know if we would have been if we didn't have, like, this time apart. We see each other every day. Yeah. But it's just been really good for us. And look, we lived together for a long time too, but it was just the. The best decision for us at this time. And it's. It's felt like such a gift.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And it's still, it's felt so blessed for us. But it was really hard making that decision, like, financially, it was something that we had to think about. Just what other people were going to think was really hard. But we've had so much support from the people who know us and love us, and it's been a really special season. I feel like that, yeah, even though it was difficult, has been so huge for us, and it's made us spend the time that we have together with true intention. That's been really, really cool. Like, we have, like, a whole thing that we do every night before, whether we are together, like, after dinner or if we've had a busy day. We call each other. We go through our days, our highs and lows, what we appreciate about each other, reassuring the other person about maybe some belief that they're, like, working through. Yeah, that's. That's not true. And it's been so, so, so awesome. So I feel really blessed, and I feel like it's been great for us, and I think it's cool to talk about because some people maybe think, oh, it's just the way that it's been, so you can't change, but you can always change your relationship. You can always grow, and it can look different for everyone, and it's honestly made us even closer in a way. But there's definitely times where we, like, long for each other and, like, miss each other. But, yeah, we know that we're going to be together, so it's just gonna make that all so much sweeter, I think.

[Taylor]

Yeah, I was just gonna say, I feel like this is. It's almost. It feels like it's almost breathing new life into your relationship, because, like, you know, I don't hear of a lot of people that live together and then live apart, and then when they get married, they live together again. But I feel. I definitely feel like. I mean, I feel like you have this outlook on it now, but I think you guys are gonna look back on it and be like, how cool. Like, you guys really got to, like, settle into, like, who you are. And, you know, there's always, like, nerves and jitters before, like, wedding and stuff. And it's like, am. You know, am I the person I want to be before this? And I feel like it's giving both of you the time to do that and also just, like, really appreciate, like, your time together.

[Hannah]

Truly, like, it's. It's been so cool. But I think the biggest thing is just the people that we were when we met, we are totally different. We've We've learned so much about each other, and we've. We've changed, and we have allowed. I think we've allowed ourselves to change, and I'm so proud of that. And to change our beliefs, to change how we show up for each other, how we show up in the world. And sometimes that. Not. That's not going to make sense to other people, but when you feel like in your spirit, you're doing the right thing for you, and, yeah, it's. It gives you that freedom, and I think we've both experienced that, and it's truly made us love and appreciate each other in a way that it's just easy when life, like, you're just in the mundane of life to. To not. And now it's like, man, we really miss each other.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And we're so excited to be able to come together and really, like, live our life aligned in the values that we have and that we've set. And that's what a lot of this time has been about, like, setting clear values and intention for who we want to be as individuals and who we are as a couple. So, yeah, it's been awesome.

[Taylor]

That's so special.

[Hannah]

I highly recommend. It's kind of weird, but it's also been awesome.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

I mean, I feel like that's so special. I'm so excited for you guys and what's to come. I feel it, too. Like, I. I feel like. I mean, not that your presence was bad or anything negative before, but I do feel like there is, like, a. Like, a new kind of, like, lightness about you. Like, not, like, airiness, but, like, it's just like this. Like. Yeah, it's just this, like, lighter. I don't know.

[Hannah]

Yeah, I. I agree. I think I had a lot that I had to process, and it's been so cool. I've. I think a lot of times you think, oh, you have to, like, heal on your own and, like, be a better person for yourself. But I really feel like you can heal in relationship, especially if you have, like, relational wounds. And Adam has really helped me with that so much. And just. I moved to Nashville about. We moved to Nashville together a few years ago, and I think just being closer to home has been so grounding for me as well. But I put in a lot of work in my own healing journey, and. And I'm starting to kind of finally see the fruits of the labor and have a community and people that have been like, supporting me and encouraging me. It's been really huge, so I feel lighter. Probably than the last time that I saw you and was sitting here, too. So it's cool to hear people say that because I know I feel it. But you don't know if other people experience that too.

[Taylor]

No, for sure. When did you get your brain scanned? Is that a somewhat recent thing or was that a while ago?

[Hannah]

Well, I did the brain scan with Dr. Amen.

[Taylor]

Okay.

[Hannah]

Oh, a hot minute ago.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But I did do, like. Have you heard of, like, neurofeedback?

[Adam]

Yes.

[Hannah]

Brain scans?

[Adam]

Yes.

[Hannah]

Or brain mapping.

[Taylor]

Okay.

[Hannah]

I did that recently. I'm just always trying to find different ways to, like, heal some of the things that I've struggled with. I've struggled with depression, I've struggled with anxiety. And really, like, learning how to rewire my brain is something I'm really passionate about right now.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Because I don't know if you struggle with this too, but, like, there can be little thoughts that I find myself looping over and over again. And so I really wanted to figure out any in all ways to be able to help me rewire and work through that. And so my therapist suggested for me to do, like, this neurofeedbacking coupled with EMDR therapy.

[Taylor]

Okay.

[Hannah]

So I've been doing that to kind of work on some old past traumas, but also just, like, you can see in my brain that, like, I was, like, on the cusp of burnout and, like, really, like, it was. It was hard to see. It's like, oh, wow. Like, I need some help. I need some support. And it's showing in my, like, brave brain wavelengths, I guess.

[Taylor]

Yes.

[Hannah]

So I've been doing that. I do all the things all the time. I'm always trying something new when it comes to my mental health. So that's been the most recent.

[Taylor]

The most recent one.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Our friend does the neurofeedback.

[Hannah]

Oh, yeah.

[Taylor]

There's a place out here. And he's like. He was, like, trying to explain it to me and Taylor, and I feel like I can, like, comprehend, like, weird things. Like, not weird things, but weird things like that. And Taylor's like, what do you mean? You, like, go and sit in there and the TV turns on and off. And so like, here, it's like our friend, he plays a video game, and it's like him driving a car and he's all, like, hooked up.

[Hannah]

Watch Gilmore Girls.

[Taylor]

Oh, my gosh.

[Hannah]

Which I'd never seen Gilmore Girls. And so, like, I am so thankful for brain mapping because it's led me to my favorite show.

[Taylor]

Oh, my gosh. That's funny.

[Hannah]

So, yeah, I just. They, like, hook up these little, like, probe things onto these different parts of your brain. And the way that your brain is rewarded for changing the rewiring of like, where it goes down is the TV or what the. Maybe the video game, whatever he's watching, it brightens up and then it'll go dark and light and dark and light. And so you're wanting it to stay bright. So your brain is, like, working really hard to keep the screen on.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

So I've watched quite a bit of Gilmore Girls in the process. But yeah, it's. It's kind of one of those, like, low lift things that if you can do it, I think it's helpful. And, you know, there's like, a few different protocols that you can do. And like, some I felt like, immediate, like, results from it almost felt like, like, oh, I could think clear. I didn't have as much brain fog. And then some, like, maybe like, shook me up a little bit more and had to, like, you know, it was. It was good because it was allowing, like, memories to be unlocked so that I could do this. Like EMDR therapy.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Um, so that was kind of. That, like, some of the things are kind of hard. Cause, like, there's a reason why you, like, shut down memories from the past, so. But I can push through anything and in the. If the result is for healing and being a better version of myself. So I'm like, we're going to do all the things.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

How have you been liking emdr? Because I did it and I liked it. Taylor tried it and he didn't like it.

[Hannah]

I don't love it.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

I actually. I've only done like, two sessions, but the therapist that I work with, like, does really long sessions, so.

[Taylor]

Okay.

[Hannah]

A session for me could be like five hours. So it's like five weeks of therapy because you just works really in intense, which is awesome.

[Taylor]

I kind of like that.

[Hannah]

No, it's. It's great. I've learned so much and have been able to really, like, have so many breakthrough sessions lately. And I think that's where, like, my, like, peace is coming from. Because it's not like I leave a session and feel like, oh, something's open, I need to go back and talk about it. I'm like, oh, my gosh. I can, like, map this fully.

[Taylor]

You, like, have closure almost at the end of it.

[Hannah]

Yes. And it's like, oh, that's not something that I have to continue to come back to because I know the reason why I do the things that I do because I was able to, like, connect dot A to Z and all the way in between. So EMDR is really tough because there is a reason why we shove things down because they're super painful. And what is interesting is the therapist that we work with is our couples therapist and does our individual. But what we've learned is, like, healing and relationship is so important. And so Adam has actually, like, sat in on my own EMDR sessions, but he's like, in the back because when you're having these big aha awareness things, it's draining, first of all. And then to have to go back and tell your partner so that you can co regulate, like, all the things that like, yeah, you've, you know, of the session can be really, really tough. And so he was actually there the past few or a couple that I've done. And it's been so connecting because, like, I don't know about for how your EMDR sessions have been, but I had to, like, list out, like, all the worst things that have happened to me that I can, you know, like, remember. And then there's, like, themes of them, and it's like, okay, we're gonna target this one. And it might not be the. The worst thing that's happened.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But it's. I haven't done my, like, biggest trauma yet. I'll say that.

[Taylor]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I know what that is. And, like, I haven't done that. We haven't made it.

[Taylor]

You're working your way up to it.

[Hannah]

You know, so we did one that was, like, harder.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Like, the one memory, I'll just like one memory, which is definitely tough. Like, don't get me wrong, was my aunt and my cousins were brutally murdered, and I was the same age as my cousin, and so is my brother. And it was just like that whole experience of, like, coming to terms that was like, pretty traumatic for me. But in some ways, that was one of the easier ones. Bizarre. But maybe just because I had processed it a little bit.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And we, like, targeted that memory. But then other things will kind of come up and you just like.

[Taylor]

Yeah, it was just like I fully.

[Hannah]

Got this, like, almost like, snap into place of like, oh, I have taken. Taken this message from this bad moment in my life and. And attached meaning to it. And because of that, like, I show up in these ways are these things trigger me. And it was painful. It's hard to talk about things that were so hurtful. But to have know that Adam was there and feel like I was under, like, really good Care.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

It was great, but I also hated it the entire time. I. I wish I had a video, and I. I will. I do want to video it at some point, but the whole time, like, did you, like, listen to this? Did you have, like, headphones on for you?

[Taylor]

I did, but I did it virtually. She was on a computer, and I did the tapping.

[Hannah]

I did yourself.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Okay. So this is. I have headphones on, and I had the two tappers that, like, that would, like, go left and right and, like, buzz. And in the whole thing, I'm going. She's, like, asking me to, like, process something, and I'm just going, this isn't working. This isn't working, like, the whole time. And Adam is like, I. Like, I was taking everything in me not to laugh because you were getting so frustrated of, like, this isn't working. I'm not. Because I don't know. There's so many techniques for how to do it.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But I felt like I needed to have, like, some big. Aha.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Think. And it wasn't that. It was little pieces of things that she was able to, like, help me kind of see a clearer picture.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I. I think I just, like. Just, like who I am. Just, like, want it to be perfect and to have some perfect solution, and. And that wasn't the case. But I did find so much relief from it. But in the process, I hated it, and I felt like I was doing it wrong.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

How was your process?

[Taylor]

I feel like that's definitely a vibe from people that I've talked to that I've done it. I did it specifically for, like, my PTSD from working through Covid. So I feel like I was able to, like, really dive back into it because, like, I know I'm not gonna be working in the hospital again. Like, I know I'm removed from it.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

So I feel like it was almost. My gosh, Lily. I wish the camera could see. Lily is literally rolling around on her back on the floor. She's a happy girl. She likes our conversation. But it's. It was a situation I know I'm never going to be in. So I feel like it was easier for me to, like, put myself back there. And then when I'm done with the session, I've, like, I know I'm not, like, there.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

And I feel like, in a weird way, that's almost like with your family members being murdered. Like, I feel like.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

In some weird way, because, like, that's not. It was one.

[Taylor]

It was something that happened.

[Hannah]

Yes. Event that obviously death is horrible, and it's very apart.

[Taylor]

We're not saying that it was.

[Hannah]

It was horrible, and it definitely, like, caused a lot of hurt in my family, and there's still residual effects from that tragedy.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

But it.

[Hannah]

Yes.

[Taylor]

It was, like, an isolated.

[Hannah]

Where these beliefs that we get, like, over and over again, those are kind of, like, harder.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And there's, like, a moment. You can pinpoint it, but those are harder to, like, dive into.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Yeah, for sure. I love. I love that, like, length of session. That's really cool. That would be Taylor's worst nightmare. He would want to crawl in a hole and die.

[Hannah]

I don't know. I think it depends on, you know, who's doing it.

[Taylor]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I just feel really thankful for our. Our therapist and how we, like, found her, and just, like, she always does these things at the end of the session, like, where she just wants to tell us how she appreciate what she appreciates about, like, what we did in our session today and, like, reassure and, like, to know that somebody, like, deeply cares about you and you're healing. Like, obviously, we know, like, there's family or friends, but, like, somebody who, like, probably knows you. Our therapists sometimes know us more than, like, our closest friends and family. We say the things that we're scared to say in front of other people and to feel like somebody, like, really cares about you and doesn't think you're too much and is so proud of you. Like, that feels really good because sometimes I feel like, like, oh, my gosh, am I ever gonna be, like, fully healed? Like, am I always gonna struggle with anxiety or depress, depression? And to know that somebody is, like, there and is, like, on the journey with me and is going to, like, help feels so, so good. And. Yeah. And then I'm not too much. That's, like, always the reassurance that she has to tell me that I'm not too much and that I'm not a burden. Like, it feels so good that I'm, like, gosh, how are you? How can you spend this much time on these? She's like, because I care about you. And, like, we do have these huge. You're, like, on a roll right now. I do feel like I'm, like, on a roll when it comes to my healing. I'm, like, having these, like, breakthroughs and realizations, like, every session, and that feels so good. So awesome.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

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That's O l l I e.com Squeeze and enter code Squeeze to get 60 off your first box. Whether you work from home and never know what to put on or you're just not in love with anything, when you open up your closet, it's time to find clothes that work with your life right now, whatever phase you're in. Splendid has cozy, stylish, timeless pieces you'll actually be excited to wear. Splendid has the world's softest closet staples to elevate wardrobe and help you feel comfortable and confident in every outfit. Think buttery soft tees, pull on pants that fit just right, easy sets, sweaters for every season, and so much more. Their pieces are next level soft and actually hold up in the wash. I am one, as you guys know. You see me each week on this podcast. You know I love being comfortable, but just because we're comfortable doesn't mean that we have to sacrifice looking good. And that's where Splendid comes in. Because their clothes, let me tell you, are so, so comfortable. Their T shirts are my absolute favorite T shirts ever. They are just this like, buttery yummy. I honestly don't know how else to describe it than yummy. Their clothes are amazing and they're also cute. So I can be comfortable in what I'm wearing, but also look cute. With Splendid. The basics aren't boring. They're your closet's secret weapon. These are the staples that simplify your morning and elevate everything after that. And right now, Splendid is offering our listeners 20 off. When you go to splendid.com and use promo Code Taylor at checkout or when you shop at the Splendid in stores, go to splendid.com and use code Taylor to get 20% off online or in store. That's splendid.com promo code Taylor. I love that you guys have the same. We, Taylor and I have the same therapist that we've seen, like together and separate. And I honestly feel like it's one of the best things because he, we have, we see a male and he, like, he just understands us both. So well, and so, like, a few weeks ago, I was in there with him, and I was like. I had said something, and I was like, yeah, and Taylor does this and something silly that annoys me. And he was like, oh, well, he's just processing. And he, like, said it so nonchalantly and, like, continued on his sentence. And I was like, oh, my gosh, here I am. Like, when Taylor gets upset, he'll kind of, like, just repeat himself. I'm like, baby, you already said it. You don't need to say it again. Like, that's just, like, me, like, getting annoyed with him. And when our therapist was like, oh, that's him, like, just processing it, and I'm like, oh, my gosh, I'm horrible. I've literally been getting annoyed at him just for trying to process things our entire relationship. Like, but it was just so funny. Like. Like, if my therapist didn't know him, like, they wouldn't know. I mean, I'm sure they would know that that's some form of processing, but. Well.

[Hannah]

I think there's, like, some statistic or something out there. Like, if you go to therapy, especially if you go, like, individual to individual therapy, and, like, especially if it's something about your relationship, but there's a betrayal or something, and, like, you go individually, like, if there's not much repair that's happening, it actually can cause people to split and to not have resol. When only one person's going, or you're seeing two individual people that are not hearing the other side of the story or not hearing the heart of the other person to be able to say, oh, he's doing that because he's processing because of X, Y, and Z. Like, not that that's something that would, like, yeah, be that. But, like, I think it's so cool to have somebody who. Like, this is why I'm, like, such a proponent of, like, couples therapy. To have somebody that is both of your cheerleader and your cheerleader to be together.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

That is. Is wanting the best for both of you, for you both to be the best versions of yourself. For the other person. Yeah. And for yourself. And so that, you know, there might be this thing that Adam does that's really challenging for me, or we grew up in, like, very different, like, households of how, like, my family is pretty volatile, but definitely will let you know how they feel. And his family, like, kind of didn't talk about any emotions. And so he just sometimes feels the need to be, like, super efficient about what he says, but actually doesn't, like, Tell me how he feels.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And that can be really hard, which makes me want to be, like, volatile and loud and, like, I don't want to be that too. And if we were going to two separate therapists, like, you could paint that in a picture of, like, oh, he's never going to change, or, oh, this is. That's weird that he does this or that she does this. But to have somebody be able to, like, hear the full picture of his background. What are. He's has his own individual struggles. My background. My own individual struggles. And being able to, like, teach us how to be there for each other, how to regulate with each other when one of or the others triggered, like.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

It has been so cool to have somebody invested in both of our lives and in our relationship. Yeah, I think it's the best.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

I'm such a big fan of it.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Yeah. We did some. We did couples therapy before we got married, but with our friend who was our. Who married us with him and his wife. And it was honestly, like, I mean, saying technically, I mean, I guess you could call it couples therapy. Wasn't like, with a therapist, but, like, we did, like, sessions with them. And, you know, they do it for a lot of people, but it was cool just to, like, even have that time. It's like a safe space with, like, our friends where we were like, hey, we actually, like, we already know we're struggling with this in our relationship. How could we work towards, you know, healing it or fixing this so that it doesn't become a problem in our marriage? And it's.

[Hannah]

I actually love that y' all did that with friends, because community is so. I'm finding so important. I feel like whenever I'm not doing well, I isolate pretty intensely. And learning to, like, lean into the. Your people and to say, hey, I'm struggling with this, or, hey, like, this is a really big commitment. And we have these few things that we are our areas that we can improve. Can you hold us accountable? Do you have any advice for us? Like, yeah, learning to do that has been huge. And. Yeah, I think that's awesome. I think having. I think sometimes people think that you gotta conquer it on your own or if you're in a relationship, it's like, you need to work it out between you two. And other people don't need to have any part in your business and your relationship. And I just do not agree with that. I think that you definitely have to agree. Protect your relationship and your partner.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But you have to bring people into your relationship. That are going to speak life into your relationship, who want you guys to win and are there for both of you. Not just like your girlfriend or his guy friends, but, like, are speaking life into your relationship. So I love that. And that has been like, a big key importance to our relationship and why I'm so excited to like, have those people at our wedding that are like, yeah, Coming together, supporting us, I think is huge.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

I feel like that's something that we've really, like, been able to integrate is like, having couple friends has been so cool. And obviously that's something that comes, like, as you get older. But it's been really cool. I feel like that we're in this season of it, and you know, my friends, if I'm doing something dumb, like, I want them to be like, slow down. Like, you're being a little crazy, or like, vice versa, like, I need to be able to be like, hey, calm down. Like, cool it.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

And like, or whatever it is. I'm. I'm a very blunt, sarcastic person. So that's like how that's like intimacy for me in friendships. Like, that's how I am. And if someone can tell me I'm being crazy, I'm like, I love you. Thank you for that. Like, that is like the best thing. So, like, having finding those people that, like, I know, like, genuinely love me and want the best, and they're gonna.

[Hannah]

Call you out when you're acting crazy.

[Taylor]

Yeah, it's just like, it's the best.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

It's truly the best.

[Hannah]

I agree.

[Taylor]

Do you like that? Honey, what do you want? You want to come up here? Lily's pacing around. If you hear. Heard her little nails clicking around. Okay. I'm excited to talk about your miss Little author over here because last time you were here, I think you had, like, recently you'd only had your first.

[Hannah]

My first book.

[Taylor]

Yeah. And so much.

[Hannah]

When did I come here? Was it after Special forces?

[Taylor]

Yes, right after.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Taylor]

And you had talked so much during the interview about how much you loved reading fiction books and, like, actually so much you were like, it's my favorite form of self care, all of this stuff. And I'm like, wait, this is hysterical. Because now you're literally writing fiction books. Where, like, where did this idea come from? Like, clearly you loved reading, but were you ever like, I could do this or what sparked that?

[Hannah]

I say writing these fiction, romance novels has been like my first actual dream come true. Because a lot of the other things that I've done have been, like, bizarre or like, I Could have never, like, imagined. But, yeah, I've always loved reading, always loved writing. And so I can vividly remember being sitting on my mom's kitchen counter and telling her, like, I know this is crazy, but, like, I just really want to write a book one day. And I wasn't thinking a book about my life because, like, I wouldn't have thought anybody would have cared. But my original idea for a book, which, who knows, maybe one day, but it's not really in the romance genre, was kind of based off my grandmother's life. And that's, like, what I had thought of when I was telling my mom this on my kitchen counter.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But, you know, my life changed very. A lot more than I ever thought it would between that time and now.

[Taylor]

Yeah, for sure.

[Hannah]

You know, I. I got to experience living out my romantic life for millions of people to see and, like, people being so invested in my love story and so invested in my personal love story now. And I thought it would be really cool to be able to give them other love stories to root for. And so I got to kind of pair my past of being in bachelor bachelorette world and my love for writing. And it came together and made sense to write a romance novel. And now this is my second one. The four engagement reigns of civil reign that's coming out this year, and it's been so awesome. The original idea, actually, again, didn't start off as, like, this, like, romance. I wanted to write from what I know, and the only thing I know is those feelings that I. Experiences that I've had. But, like, I didn't want to write just about my life. So I. I thought of, like, this experience between four best friends, the core four, and each of the. The women. It's kind of like a part of me, but just, like, exasperated and, like, exaggerated in some way. And so that was the original, like, idea pitch, and then for them to have their own love stories. But I truly believe, as we've kind of talked about, like, the people in your life, the friends in your life, are like, one of the greatest love stories that you'll ever get to experience. And so it was really. The first idea was like, how did these women help each other navigate life and love and loss and all the things. And then my first book followed Emma on her love story, and now sip Now Sybil was a part of that book because it was obviously like, yeah, the group of girls was like, the main first original idea. And then people wanted to know more about civil and her life and what was happening. What would happen because the. The first book Mistakes we Never Made was centered around Sybil's wedding weekend.

[Taylor]

Okay.

[Hannah]

But Sybil becomes a runaway bride. And there is a lot of, like, unanswered questions. And so this book, the Four Engagement Rings of Civil Rain, this book kind of answers all those questions that readers were like, what? Where the heck did she go? Or what's wrong with her? Yeah, do they get married? And so it was really fun. I feel like this book was. Was for the readers who supported me in my first experience doing this little passion project. And so it's been amazing. I'm so excited that I had the opportunity to tell Civil Story and that people have been just so supportive because, yeah, this is my first real dream come true. And, yeah, it's been really fun.

[Taylor]

Oh, my gosh, I'm so excited. Was that, like, scary, like, putting out, like, in a way, I almost feel like. Like, it would be a little more scary to, like, write something than, like, to write about your own life. Like, to write. I don't know, I could be wrong.

[Hannah]

You're like, what's harder?

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

I think what was hard about my first book that was about my life is, like, just the honesty of it. And at that time, hadn't really done a lot of. I got started therapy and was kind of trying to unravel as I wrote, which was super cathartic.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And that was awesome. But just, like, knowing, like, I remember being so anxious before that first book came out, like, but just so ready for it to be out and to be done and people could say whatever they wanted to where this. I don't have the plot points like I do for my own life. I'm having to, like, create. And that felt. Felt pretty challenging. And I've never written a book before. I mean, I've written in my journal. Like, I've written a journal. Like, that was easier, but this definitely was an undertaking. But I had an amazing team. I have a co author, Emily Larrabee, who's been doing this for forever. So, like, they really helped and encouraged me that, like, I have good ideas. Here's how to organize things because. Or like I said, yeah, organization, planning, not my strong suit. And making sure that, like, everything weaves together in, like, a really beautiful way. And the story that I really have is told in the best way possible. So that is what has been, like, such a blessing for me to make it not as scary as I guess it could be, is that I have people that are supporting me and encouraging me and helping me in the areas that I do struggle, and having an amazing editor and publisher like that, those people coming up alongside me, like, you got this, and here's how we can help.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Has been really the. The only way that this book has gotten into the hands of people, and this second book is getting into the hands of people and not, like, 12 years in the future.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Just having people push me and encourage me every step of the way.

[Taylor]

Awesome. I'm so excited for you. Yeah. It's gonna be so fun. Okay. I have a little rapid fire segment, but before that, I literally was just told this morning that you're going to paradise.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Tell me. Tell me everything about this.

[Hannah]

I'm honestly just as shocked as you are. This has happened in the past, like, few weeks and just trying to, like, process what is happening. But, yeah, I am going to be a part of Bachelor in Paradise. Obviously, not as one of the suitors. Like, I am going as, I guess, like, an advisor, but also, like, popping some bottles of champagne, and I'm really excited about it. I first, when I got the call, I was like, wait, what? Like, I have just haven't been in that season of life in a long time.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But then I had this moment of, like, oh, wow, what a redemptive experience this. This I believe will be.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Because I have learned so much from the time that I was looking for love and in the spotlight while doing so. From then till now, a lot has happened, and there's so much wisdom that I've learned and things that I wish somebody would have told me during that time. And I really do believe. I think it's a hard way to start a relationship, but I do believe if I would have had the skills and the tools that I had now.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And believe the things that I do now, I do think there's a. A chance in a beautiful opportunity to find love.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

I just didn't know what I didn't know and that I could be a part of, like, having fun, but also, like, one of the most fun, beautiful experiences that you can have in life is falling in love.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And to be able to help people do that, like, that seems amazing. So then, like, when I started thinking of it in that way, I'm like, this is gonna be so cool. So fun. Like, Bachelor in Paradise is always, like, fun and sexy and, like.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

It has all the, like, drama. It's just going to.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But my hope is that I can really, like, help foster that opportunity for love for people. And. Yeah. I'm really excited about it.

[Taylor]

Oh, my gosh. You're literally the perfect person for it, because I feel like you're the perfect amount of, like, fun, but also you give great advice.

[Hannah]

Gonna, like, call somebody out. I was talking to my fiance, Adam, and I was like, do you feel like I just, like, say whatever. He's like, Hannah, like, you can't. Like, you try to hold back, but then you eventually just say what you're thinking. And he was like, that's great, though. Like, you. That can make it entertaining. But I have a little bit of wisdom now.

[Taylor]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

To where I can hopefully, you know, actually encourage and help people too.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Instead of just saying you're crazy, but sometimes somebody has to say it. Yeah. Like you said.

[Taylor]

Yeah. We're just trying to be said sometimes. So I'm so excited. I love paradise, so I think you're the perfect addition to that.

[Hannah]

Thanks. Love it.

[Taylor]

Okay, let's do this little. Our last little segment. So it was lemon 11 when you were here. Now it's lemon 7.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Taylor]

We did the Today show. I think it's the Today Show. And Gayle King was like. She was like, it's too many questions. You have to make it shorter. And I was like, yes, ma' am. Like, I. I sent out seven.

[Hannah]

I would definitely take advice from Gail.

[Taylor]

Yeah. So, yeah, I would literally do anything she told me to do. But. Okay, so these are our seven. Some of them are the same. So I'll tell you after what your answer was 2ish years ago.

[Hannah]

Oh, my gosh. Okay.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Okay, ready? What movie or song title best describes your mental health today?

[Hannah]

Oh, my God, this is so hard.

[Taylor]

It could be a tv. It could be, like, any title of something.

[Hannah]

Okay, wait. It was TV or song.

[Taylor]

Yeah. Movie or song title.

[Hannah]

Or movie or song title.

[Taylor]

Okay, I'll open it up to tv.

[Hannah]

Oh, my gosh. I don't.

[Taylor]

I suddenly don't know any movies or any songs.

[Hannah]

It's all blank.

[Taylor]

I'll come back.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Taylor]

I don't want to tell you what you said, because I almost feel like you could say it again. Maybe not. Okay. Number two is how open are you with people in your life when you're struggling?

[Hannah]

We kind of talked about this a little bit earlier. I'm trying to get better.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But I would say I've always. Well, like I said, you can't really. I can't really hide anything, but I just, like, isolate, so they just can't know. But I've gotten a lot better about saying, I need help and exactly how I'm feeling Is it? I have to do, like, scale, like, one. Okay.

[Taylor]

Yeah, that's good.

[Hannah]

It's getting better. I'm. I'm healing.

[Taylor]

Yeah. No, yeah, you.

[Hannah]

You.

[Taylor]

You didn't want to answer that question. And you were like, I'm not as open as I should be. And you talked about isolating yourself. So there's improvement there. Good job. Yes. Okay, this question is a new one. If you could follow only three social media accounts across, like, any platform, what would they be?

[Hannah]

Oh, wow. Okay. Probably like, Heather, man, Because I think that she's so funny.

[Taylor]

Oh, yeah.

[Hannah]

And just a good human. And she makes me laugh. My therapist, because she makes me better and reminds me of the things that I need to be doing and the ways I need to be thinking. I would probably follow Dr. Amen, because he also reminds me to take better care of my brain.

[Taylor]

That's good.

[Hannah]

And he's just been, like, such a huge part of me, like, really starting my healing journey and always has good tips.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Yeah, that's good.

[Taylor]

I like those. Okay. Number four is favorite form of self care.

[Hannah]

Oh, favorite form of self care. I love going on walks in my neighborhood. I live in, like, a very walkable area in Nashville, and it had, like, a lot of, like, older homes. And it's now spring, like, spring, summer, and like, just all the different flowers. Like, it just helps me live close to a park too.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

So that is just, like, one of the best things that I can do for myself. And then honestly, watching Gilmore Girls, it's just, like, my favorite way to unwind. I don't know what I'm gonna do when I. When I get to the end.

[Taylor]

I'm scared. I'm scared for you. I'm scared. I'm scared for a tend. Number five is. What do you think is the most misunderstood thing about you?

[Hannah]

Okay. So one of my best friends says this. Sometimes I don't say that I come off cold. She's like, you're not cold. But you only let, like, a few people, like, really in.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Or I have to be, like, in a certain, like, feeling safe. And I'm gonna ask you, you everything about your life, and I'm gonna really want to connect, but I have to feel, like, in the best, like.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Safe space. And so, yeah, maybe that, like, I think maybe people think that I'm probably like, always either, like, this super high energy, high personality, and not high person. I feel like I have a good personality, but, like, just like high energy. But I only can really go. I only know how to, like, go really deep. I don't know how. How long to carry on, like.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Surface level.

[Hannah]

Surface level conversation. I can do it for a little bit, but my energy just gets depleted. So maybe that I'm. I'm not like, always the most social.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Person. But if you catch me on a good day.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

I'm like, you want to get deep? I'm the last one at the party. Like, when I go out and like, it is set intentionally, I will be the last one there. And when I feel like, super safe and like, having really good conversation, I love it. But for the most part, I'm pretty much a homebody.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Two years ago you said that I'm aloof and carefree, but you're actually very self aware and you'd rather be called out on things than not.

[Hannah]

Oh, for sure. I. Sometimes there's like accountability and compassion for yourself, and I can take all the accountability in the world. I'm like, you could call me out about whatever because I probably already know it. And I'm like, you're right. Sometimes it's. It's been hard to like, be gentle with myself and be like, oh, you're like this because of this. I'm like, no, no. Yeah, call me out. And I'm like, makes sense.

[Taylor]

Yeah. Okay. Number six is who's had the most positive impact on your mental health?

[Hannah]

Oh, wow. Honestly, my fiance, Adam, he is, like, helped stretch me in ways that I needed to be stretched and think differently and see myself in different ways and also just like grown and changed alongside me. And that has been so, so healing. And I'm very thankful for him and how he's like, impacted my mental health for the best. Yeah.

[Taylor]

That was. He was your answer last time too. Oh, okay. Last one is, if you can go back to one moment in your life, what moment would that be and what would you say to yourself?

[Hannah]

Oh, my gosh.

[Taylor]

Honestly, I feel like you've kind of conquered this one. You told a story about how when you were in first grade, you were painting an Easter egg and it turned brown and you were made fun of and scared to, like, be creative.

[Hannah]

Yeah. And fail.

[Taylor]

And I feel like you writing these romance novels is really like firing up the creativeness in you.

[Hannah]

I love that.

[Taylor]

I almost feel like that's conquered. Wow.

[Hannah]

I know. I love that. I mean, if I think of another, like, do I need to say another one?

[Taylor]

No.

[Hannah]

I mean, I feel like that's so true. I. I still thought find myself struggling in different areas of my. Of my life with that creativity. But writing these books has been so, so healing and such a fun outlet. And, you know, my hope is that I'll be able to continue sharing these stories, whether that's through more books or if they get picked up and be able to be translated in different mediums and media. That would be really cool. So.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Yay.

[Hannah]

Hanging.

[Taylor]

I love that. No, you. Well, this is fun. Thanks for coming back and hanging. I love. I love getting chat with you. And I think you said it, the word that I was trying to find, like, the lightness. I really feel like it's like a piece. Like, I feel like there's like a piece and grounded and not that that was something that wasn't showing before, but I really just. It feels like you're just, like, at peace with, like, where you are, who you are.

[Hannah]

And I think I'm realizing, like, I don't have to have, like, all the answers for things.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And there's always going to be things I need to work on, but the little experiences that I've had and the little advice that I can give, like, I can share that and that's enough.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Like, I. I have gone through the things that I've gone through to be able to share the little nuggets that I can give to somebody else, but I don't have to have any more, any less than that.

[Taylor]

That's so good.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

I love it. Well, thanks for coming in. Yeah. This is so fun.

[Hannah]

Thanks.

[Taylor]

We'll have to do it again in another two and a half years.

[Hannah]

Yes.

[Taylor]

That's gonna be arcaded.

[Hannah]

Yes. I love it. I love it.

[Taylor]

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