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K. Dudley
It took me six years to get diagnosed. I did all of the initial labs. Every single one of them came back fine. So I was able to get diagnosed, which was incredible. And I was so thankful. Like, I remember crying because I was happy that I got diagnosed, because I knew, like, I didn't want to be diagnosed, but I wanted validation. You can have one really good breastfeeding journey and then not a good breastfeeding journey. And you just have to do what is mentally best for you. That is a hill I will die on, by the way. I've made the decision to breastfeed, but that's my decision. That doesn't mean that any other mom that's going to do it a different way is wrong. A fed baby is best in my opinion. A mentally sane mom is so much better than a mom who is just mentally, like, struggling every single day. I struggled with school. I didn't graduate. I've never really talked about that. I had a doctor, I'll never forget. He called me and he was like, I don't think this is gonna come as a surprise to you, but it's very obvious you have adhd. I feel like my childhood was robbed in a way. Tae and I had like a controversy a few years ago and I think in that moment I felt like that was it and like it would never get better. I told myself I wasn't gonna cry. Foreign.
Podcast Host
Drops. Welcome back to another episode of the Squeeze. I am so happy that you are here with us today and I'm so excited about today's episode because I'm sitting down with K. Dudley. If you don't know who she is, she is the other half behind the viral couple of K and Taylor. There's a lot of tase in this episode. Just warning you, but K and her husband have a massively popular lifestyle and family account with millions of followers across TikTok and Instagram. She's known for their relatable humor, heartfelt content, and K has built a strong connection with her audience by sharing the realities of marriage and motherhood, from pregnancy journeys to raising their daughters and navigating life as growing family. More recently, she's been opening up about this new chapter of life she's in, including welcoming their newest baby and adjusting to life with two under two. Today, we dive into things all mom postpartum, and K actually recently has been dealing with some health issues that led to a hospitalization. Everything is fine, but we dive into that and what it's like to have to advocate for yourself when you know something is wrong with your body, but doctors just aren't listening to you. We cover so many topics. K is so darling, and I feel like I learned so much about her, and just the strength that she exudes is truly unmatched. And I can't wait for you guys guys to hear.
Podcast Co-Host
Fun. Okay. Welcome to the Squeeze.
K. Dudley
Thank you. I'm so excited.
Podcast Co-Host
This is really fun because I'm about to, like, ask you so many mom questions. You're gonna be like, oh, my gosh. Why did I sign up for this?
K. Dudley
No, I love it. I love to give my. My mom knowledge to everyone that wants it.
Podcast Co-Host
So good. Okay, so we start each episode off with this jar. It's a little game called Citrus Scott reel. If you want to pull a little piece of paper out of there and read it to our lemon drops, those are our listeners.
K. Dudley
Okay. It says, what's a hill you will absolutely die on? Oh, goodness.
Podcast Co-Host
Oh, oh, I know mine.
K. Dudley
All the things I'm thinking of. All the things you might have to give me a minute. A hill that I will absolutely die on.
Podcast Co-Host
I'll tell you mine, and then.
K. Dudley
Yeah, you tell me yours. Maybe.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, maybe it'll get the thoughts flowing. Pineapple on pizza.
K. Dudley
Oh, that's a good one. No, I'll die on that hill, too. That 100%. I don't know why people don't like that. It's not, like, sweet and salty. Yeah, it just goes together.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
I mean, I would say SPF over makeup every day. Like, I mean, obviously I did my makeup today, but. So that's not a good example, but spf, like, it's the one thing I would take with me on a stranded island. Yeah. So important.
Podcast Co-Host
No, that's. I think one size. I think I just got it in pr. One size just came out with, like, a setting spray that has SPF in it.
K. Dudley
Oh, Oh, I need that. Yeah, I really.
Podcast Co-Host
I know, because that's something I struggle with because my mom's an esthetician, and she's always like, you need. Like, you need sunscreen.
K. Dudley
Yeah.
Podcast Co-Host
But it's hard when you, like, want to do your makeup, and then sometimes I put it on underneath, and then it just. Like, my makeup will feel weird or I just feel like my skin. Like, my pores get clogged when I do that.
K. Dudley
Yeah. I do my makeup, like, very seldomly, and most of the time, it's like SPF and, like, my moisturizer, and that's it. And I just. I feel like my skin's never been better since I started doing that, so. Yeah, I was gonna say your skin,
Sponsor Voice
like, literally looks so smooth.
K. Dudley
I'm like, you're just glowing as well, by the way. Oh, it's so good.
Podcast Co-Host
That's nice. That's nice.
K. Dudley
No, it is. And this is gonna be, like, the time where you're glowing. So.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, I'm. I'm. I feel like I'm kind of waiting for that to happen, honestly, because I am still just breaking out.
Podcast Host
I don't see it.
Podcast Co-Host
Okay.
K. Dudley
No, that's. It does not look bad, thanks to the makeup.
Podcast Co-Host
But no. My first trimester, I was, like, breaking out. Face in my scalp, like, even, like, on my chest and on my back, which I never. Yeah, I never normally break out, like, ever.
K. Dudley
Yeah.
Podcast Co-Host
And so that's. That was definitely an adjustment for me, but.
K. Dudley
Humbles you.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
That was me with my last pregnancy. Well, not like, my last, but my last last with Ellie. I had never had cystic acne in my life, and I started breaking out so bad. Like, I mean, it hurts your confidence. Like, you're already going through all these changes, but. But then, like, to be on camera every day too, I was like, I don't want to show my face to anyone, so. Yeah, I. I get that.
Podcast Co-Host
That's so true. We're. I've actually been thinking about this. What were. What similar or differences did you have in your two pregnancies?
K. Dudley
That's a good question. So with. Well, I've had three pregnancies total. Okay. With my first, I. It was, like, nothing. Like, I was 19. So in a lot of ways, this, like, my second pregnancy was new again. It was so different than the first. It was 12 years difference. But with my first, I had, like, no nausea, no acne, nothing. Like, I. If you told me I was like, you wouldn't be able to tell I was pregnant other than my bump. Like, I Had no symptoms and everyone was like, that's the exception. Like that's not really how it is for most people.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So I just knew going into my next ones it was going to be like a piece of cake. And that was the furthest thing from the truth. But my second pregnancy humbled me. It had the acne, I had horrible nausea. Um, and I don't know why they call it morning sickness. Cuz I was sick like all day.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
Um, and then with my last pregnancy, it was a little better than with Ellie. The acne was better. But I did start using my glow serum, which is something. It has like ox, it's oxygen infused, has vitamin C and aha blend. So it helps a lot and it's pregnancy safe.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So I was using that. Um, but I would say that's the only real difference other than it was a different pregnancy. And I really didn't have any nausea either with that pregnancy. So it, every pregnancy is so different. And even if it's the same person, the same dad, it doesn't even matter gender because I had all girls and like they were all so different.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So you really can't be sure from one to the next if it's going to be the same or not.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, no, I've been, I've been thinking about it a lot because I mean my pregnancy has been fine. My first trimester obviously was not fun, but now being in the second, I'm like able to be alive and functioning to some degree. But yesterday I was like just having a meltdown and I was like, I don't think I like being pregnant. Which like, you know, sounds horrible to say but like I'm not enjoying the, I'm not really enjoying all of the,
K. Dudley
I mean, your things that come along with it. I feel like that's such a valid like feeling. So many people feel that way and they don't want to express that because you know, people struggle to get pregnant. You have people that can never get pregnant and you don't want to offend those people by saying like you're not happy and you're. I mean you're happy but you're miserable. But that's something like you're entitled to feel that, you know, it's, it sucks the life out of you. It's hard, it's very hard to be pregnant. And you know, that's like, this is not to like scare you, but this is just the beginning. Like you're pregnant but then you have postpartum and I mean you have like the version of you before a baby, and then you have the version after. And for me, that happened at 19, and I never really got to enjoy my 20s where, like, I didn't have stretch marks or, you know, just a lot of things that none of my friends had to deal with yet. And, I mean, that was my fault. And, you know, I'm not blaming anybody, but it. It's just something that as I've gotten older, I've gotten more appreciative of my body changes. But it is hard to kind of wrap your mind around that. But you're allowed to feel. You're allowed to feel that. And it doesn't mean that you're not happy to be pregnant and you're not happy and excited, for sure, but you don't have to like it, you know?
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, no, I think I've. I think I've dealt with. I've never really struggled with comparison, but I've definitely found myself comparing, like, my pregnant body to other pregnant women. Especially, like, the women that are, like, weeks away from giving birth and are still, like, all skinny and fit. And I'm, like, in my husband's jeans right now, and it's like, I'm like, yeah, just not having a granddaughter. It's the first time I've really, liked, had that struggle before, which I think might also be a thing. But I think it's. I'm already, like, not feeling great about myself. But then the comparison aspect of it is.
K. Dudley
Yeah. And social media is like. Like, with my first pregnancy, I didn't have that. And I often, like, wondered, like, why did I feel totally. Like, I didn't feel mentally, like, afterwards was when I did. Because of the stretch marks. They came literally in the last four weeks. So that was unfortunate. I almost made it. Yeah. But I didn't have anything to compare it to. Like, nobody was showing their belly, like, exposed back then. It wasn't very normal to, like, wear, like, belly shirts and your belly hanging out. Which, I mean, I'm all about embracing it. Like, I mean, I even did with my last two pregnancies a little bit more than I did with my first. But, you know, I didn't have anything to compare to, so I was like, this is normal. But then you start seeing these, like, fitness gurus that are, like, you know, doing squats in these. Like, they're just, like, doing all the things, and they have, like, the tiniest frame, and their belly's just little, bitty, tiny, cute bump. And I'm massive. When I'm pregnant, I'm Very like small framed already. I'm short and so my torso is not very big.
Sponsor Voice
There's nowhere.
Podcast Co-Host
I was literally just having this conversation with my girlfriend yesterday. We were like, there's nowhere for any of the baby, the body, for anything to go, it goes out and so
K. Dudley
you typically will feel a lot larger and that's like something just being on social media I had to start like blocking out those comments because people would be like are you sure she's only 12 weeks? She looks a lot more like 25 weeks. Or you know, just comments like that and it, it starts to get to you because you're like not any one body is the same with pregnancy. Everybody cares differently. If it's your second or third, you're definitely going to show quicker. But yeah, social media makes it a lot harder on yourself.
Podcast Co-Host
What is, what is your relationship with social media? Because obviously your work is social media. You're very active on there, always sharing parts of your life. How, how have you kind of learned? How long have you been doing it? Actually like, like as a job.
K. Dudley
As a job. So we started the beginning of 2022 but I didn't go full time until the end of 2022 so it was almost 2023. So very like relatively new. Yeah, it kind of like I say blew up but I feel like some people have like a blow up moment and it's like a two week thing and then they go from like nothing to like millions. Yeah, that's not how it was for us but it definitely like over the first year we hit a million at one year like literally to the day. It was crazy.
Podcast Co-Host
If you hear baby noises, there's a baby in here.
K. Dudley
That's my baby. She's self soothing by the way. That's what she does when she's trying to go back to sleep. But anyway, so when I went full time it was kind of a gradual like, I don't know, progression. And yeah, it's only been like three or four years but my relationship with social media is, I don't, I don't really consume a lot of social media if I'm being honest. Like yeah, I don't follow. I mean I follow people but I'm not really like closely monitoring anyone like in particular I kind of just scroll like I don't even really get. I haven't gone on TikTok. This is gonna sound crazy but I have not actually opened my TikTok app in over a year probably. Taylor posts everything and TikTok is one
Podcast Co-Host
of his husband is named Taylor. Just so.
K. Dudley
That is a little confusing. So my, like, Taylor. My Taylor.
Podcast Co-Host
Yes. Just our listeners that weren't aware of that.
K. Dudley
There's a lot of taste and Taylor's gonna be thrown around here. But my Taylor, he does all the social media posting. And it just got to, like, a few years ago, I was struggling mentally, like, reading comments, and I'm not a post and ghost person. I have to read all the comments and it mentally start, like, it starts getting to you when you have way too much feedback coming. Like, no one single person should be seeing that much about people's opinions about themselves or how they're parenting or how they're living their lives or whatever. And a lot of people have really mean, nasty opinions about people. And so I just got to a point where I was like, I can't get on that app anymore. It, to me seemed more toxic than Instagram.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
I feel like with Instagram, it's more of a community. I feel like I've. Tay and I both have created a really good community on there.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
And I can get on there a little bit easier than I can tick tock. But I haven't been on there over a year, probably.
Podcast Co-Host
No, that's.
K. Dudley
Yeah, it's crazy.
Podcast Co-Host
That's really good.
K. Dudley
I've thought about deleting the app, to be honest, because, I mean, I don't really have a reason to be on there.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
Because Tay posts it. So.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, no, that's. That's really good. And I feel like too, when I'm posting more on, like, when I'm. Because I'm in no way. I don't consider myself a content creator because I have. No, I'm not. That's like, that's a job title that I do not own because I'm not posting multiple times a day. Like, I'm not. There's no consistency anywhere in anything. But when I am trying to be more consistent with posting, I find myself not on the apps as much because it is more like work. So I'm not really, like, I'll pop on to, like, you know, respond to a couple comments and do whatever tricks that people say you're supposed to do for the engagement that I'll, like, go off.
K. Dudley
Yeah.
Podcast Co-Host
So I feel like that's a good spot to.
K. Dudley
Yeah.
Podcast Co-Host
To be in. How. And that's probably helped a lot with. Were you seeing the comments more so, like, in the beginning or before you stopped the comments?
K. Dudley
Yeah, in the beginning it was. I mean, nobody really knew who we were in the beginning, so the comments were a Little bit more harsh because they were just like, they had no idea what our story was or anything. And then as we built a community, they got a little better. But with Tick Tock, the people there are just a little more brutal. And so I would see all those comments, like, especially as we started getting larger and getting more views and yeah, it was just, it was really hard to get on. The people make like the talking head videos is what I call them. And so they'll like take something that you like said, whether it's on a podcast or in a reel that you posted or, you know, a story or whatever, and they'll clip it and then they'll post it and put a little talking head and it's like critiquing whatever you said. And I just didn't want to like run into those kind of videos. So I just, I was like, I'm just gonna shut it out. And you know, it's a, it's a job, like you said. It's, it's job. It helps me provide for my family. And that's, that's really what I have to like mentally tell myself.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, no, that's, that's such a good relationship to have with it.
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Podcast Co-Host
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Podcast Co-Host
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Podcast Co-Host
When you and since becoming parents, you and Taylor, how do you feel like your relationship has evolved? And do you have any advice for myself and my marriage and for anyone listening, that's maybe a new parent?
K. Dudley
Yes, I would say it's actually something I don't want to say, like, struggled, but it was definitely an awakening for Tay and I to have our first together because we were together like, almost eight years before we got pregnant. So we had a lot of time where it was like. Like we didn't have like an infant. And once we did, you almost get like this without even trying. You almost get like this roommate feeling where you're both just like in deep in the parenting. And in order to get out of that, we really had to prioritize time together, like in the evenings. And I feel like this is very normal for most couples, but you kind of unintentionally get into this, like, roommate stage where you just feel like you're just deep in the weeds of parenting and you're not sleeping. I wasn't really doing A whole lot to, like. Not that I let myself go, but, I mean, I was just, like, I was breastfeeding, and I had milk stains, and I was pumping all the time, and I was, you know, still looked pregnant. Yeah. So it's. We really had to, like, prioritize our evenings together. Um, so once we put the girls down, even in the very beginning, when Sutton was still, like, not on a schedule, we would, like, put her down next to us, and we would, like, have a movie night, and we really try to do that multiple times a week, and I think that helps a lot. Um, we don't personally, like, go out to dinner a lot, but I. I feel like that is something like prioritizing a date night. Yeah. Even if. Even if that is at home. Like, just as long as you're prioritizing time between you two. At the end of the day, like, your kids will have a better life if their parents are, like, having. If they have a strong relationship. Like, you want to be able to model that relationship for your children and. Yeah. Because that's more important than, you know, put. Not that your kids shouldn't come first, but your kids really, in my opinion, should not come before your marriage. Like, you have to balance it.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
You know, you can't let your marriage go.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, no, I've been trying to. We've been trying to do, like, date nights and things, or, like, if. If something happens and we're like, oh, a date brunch. Like, Taylor or. I got a nail on the tire, and Taylor took my tailor. We're used to multiple tailors over here, so I think our lemon drops will get it. I got a nail on the tire, and he went to go, like, fix it for me, but then I had to go pick them up because they were changing it. And then we ended up. I was hungry, so we ended up, like, getting tacos at this restaurant next door, and we're like, oh, date. Like, we're, like, trying to kind of, like, romanticize all of our, like, little moments together.
K. Dudley
That's literally our, like, slogan, is romanticizing all of life's moments. Whether that's, like, going furniture shopping or just literally anything, we try to just romanticize every aspect of it. And that's such a good way to put it is, like, even if it's just a nail in the tire, and you have to, like, go get it fixed or something. Make it a date. Like, make it fun.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah. How. What does, like, support look like for the two of you? And how. How do you ask? Or have that line of communication with your partner when you're needing more support. Because I feel like a lot of women haven't maybe had those conversations yet with their spouses about needing that support. Because a lot of. Especially if you're breastfeeding, a lot of the job falls on the mom. How would you, like, what would your advice be to. On that?
K. Dudley
I mean, you definitely can't hold in your feelings. I feel like with Taylor, I'm. I'm really. I've. I've learned to be very open and just, like, honest with him when I'm feeling. Anyway, um. Like, after I had Ellie, I was not expecting. Like I said with Kinsley, with my first, I didn't really have, like, postpartum depression or baby blues. Nothing. Like, I just. I mean, I wasn't. Obviously, that marriage ended, but in terms of, like, the pregnancy, emotions and mental health, I was pretty good. But with Taylor, I wasn't expecting to have, like, such significant sadness afterwards. Like, it. It hit me, like, out of nowhere. I would just cry for nothing. Like, literally nothing. And I had to learn to just tell him, like, this is how I'm feeling. I need your support. I need you to help me. And I will say I am very lucky that I have somebody who takes on the parenting. Like, he doesn't babysit. He's 100% in. And I think that's, like. That's such a big thing. And I feel like, like you said, a lot of women don't have that, but I feel like if they're not experiencing that with their husband, they've just gotta, like, tell them. They have to tell them, like, hey, this. I'm overwhelmed. Because moms do get overwhelmed. You're breastfeeding, you're going through body changes, and you just have to be open to communication.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
Yeah. Did you.
Podcast Co-Host
Did you breastfeed with both, with both, or I guess all of your pregnancies?
K. Dudley
Yep.
Podcast Co-Host
Okay. I'm trying to figure out, like, what. What I want to do, I think, because everyone. I don't know why it is such a common question.
K. Dudley
Like. And it's such a controversial one, too.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So many people have very strong opinions about it.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
Sponsor Voice
I just.
Podcast Co-Host
I just read an article. I think her name is Elsie. It's Pete Davidson's wife.
K. Dudley
Oh, okay. Yeah.
Podcast Co-Host
Or partner, baby mama. I'm not sure where they're at and their marital journey, but she wrote an article that my friend sent me about her decision to not breastfeed and actually was, like, a really. It just kind of, like, opened my eyes. To just, like, have. It was really nice to just read someone talking about it, because the truth is, there's also, like, I've friends that, you know, did formula with their first and then breastfed the second or vice versa. I also have friends that her first one breastfed, and then the second one was allergic to her breast milk, so she had to do form. Like, there was just, like, so many random things. So I think I'm trying to go into it with, like, both. Like, what if. You know, what if my baby doesn't want to watch? What if, like, there's just so many.
K. Dudley
Like, there's so many variables.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
And, like, you said, like, one, you can have one really good, like, breastfeeding journey, and then you can have not a good breastfeeding journey, and you just have to do what is mentally best for you. I'm like, that is a hill I will die on, by the way, which. That. I could not think of that earlier. But that is. That's so, like, to my core, I feel like, obviously I've made the decision to breastfeed, but that's my decision. That doesn't mean that any other mom that's gonna do it a different way is wrong. A fed baby is a. Is best, in my opinion. But. And, like, like, even this. This journey with Sutton, I. I have lupus. I can't take my lupus medication when I'm breastfeeding. So I mentally went into it this time, knowing that if I had to stop, I would stop. And I'm not gonna, like, torture myself, because I have, like, this goal, which is what I did the last time with Ellie. I had this goal, and I was, like, miserable, and I felt terrible all. All postpartum. And I. I think you just have to do what's best for you, because a mentally, mentally sane mom is so much better than a mom who is just. They can't do it anymore. You know, you're just mentally, like, struggling every single day. Like, that's not good for your baby. So I think you have to, like, just tune out all of the opinions. Like, you're going to see so many opinions, not just on breastfeeding. Like, everything you do, whether you get the epidural, like, you're going to get so much unsolicited advice, it's not even funny. I'm sure you already have, and it's just, like, you just got to do. You do. You don't worry about anybody else. Like, you know what your baby needs, you know what you need. You know what your husband Needs. Yeah. And I think that's, like, priority number one.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, that's so true. What has your experience been? You've kind of talked about, like, postpartum, and did you struggle with postpartum depression with any of your pregnancies?
K. Dudley
Yes. So my last pregnancy, I feel like I got through it a lot quicker. I even. I was just telling Tay the other day, I kind of thought that I had gotten through it this time, like, you know, a few months in, but I've even the last, like, few months, like, and it could be because I've been so sick, but I feel like the last month or two, like, I don't know if it's, like, a relapse or what, but I have felt, like, just so sad. Like, I'll just cry for no reason. And I've heard that it can, like, happen like that. Like, you can just have, like, days where you feel great mentally, and then you can just not feel good again. That's been, honestly, the hardest part of postpartum for me, is just, like, crying about every single thing. And literally not like, I don't even have to have a reason to cry. I can just literally feel hopeless. Yeah, it's so weird because you'll just cry and, like, Tay will be like, what's wrong? And I'm like, I don't know. Like, I have no. I, I, I don't even know how to fix it because I don't even know what's wrong with me. I'm just sad for no reason. That's. That's very challenging. That's the hardest part for me. Like, I feel like guys when, when women cry are just like, what do I do? How do I fix this? And it's such a. It's. It's like biologic for, like, good men to want to fix the problem. And that's something that Tay, like, I think it would get to him when, like, my Tay, it would get to him whenever I would be crying, and he would, like, not know how to fix it, and he wanted to fix it so bad, and it took a while for him to realize, like, there's nothing he can do to fix it. He just has to be there for me. That's, like, the biggest thing is just making sure that. That for, like, other women, too. Like, don't let your husband, like, feel like they need to fix it, and don't expect them to fix it, because they're not going to. Like, you're just going to feel this way two hours later or the next day just holding you saying whatever you need. Event. Like, just, like, event sesh, like. Yeah, you know, that helps a lot. I'll just vent about, like, a million things, and he's like, okay. And he just, like, listens. It's just getting to that point in your relationship where you just. It's an open door, and you can just vent and listen to each other. I think that's been really, really helpful for us.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, I've been trying to practice that more. Before the baby comes, I want to talk about your lupus. You touched on it a little bit. Um, that's something that I've been learning more about, because during all of the pregnancy and my testing, I had my autoimmune marker come back positive. Thankfully, my cells are just speckled, which means that I only have, like, a 5% chance of getting lupus. But that's still there. Yeah, but it was something that I literally had no clue about, so. And that. That I feel like a lot of. There are a lot of celebrities that have lupus, and I've heard of it, but I never really have thought of it deeply until going through that. How. When were you diagnosed with lupus?
K. Dudley
January of 2025.
Podcast Co-Host
Oh, wow.
K. Dudley
It took me six years to get diagnosed. It's been a long journey. Like, one of the hardest journeys I've ever been through. But there was just something about being validated. Like, I knew for years.
Podcast Co-Host
Yes.
K. Dudley
So my mom has lupus, which is another reason I kept pushing and advocating for myself, because I. So she got diagnosed in her 30s. She had symptoms for years, but she didn't get diagnosed until I was, like, late teens. And I saw what. That. What she went through. And I also. I mean, when I say, like, carbon copy, my mom and I are, like. When it comes to our bodies and, like, health, we're, like, the same. Like, like on a checkbook. Like, yeah. Literally the same. So she was able to, like, see my symptoms very early on. I mean, it was so mild that most people, including myself, probably would have just, like, brushed it off. I would have, like, random little, like, body aches and then, you know, kind of where you feel like you're about to get the flu or something, and then it wouldn't happen for, like, two weeks. So I just didn't really, like, take it seriously at first. And she was like, no, that's like, you need to at least be checked. Like, I'm not saying you have lupus because there's so many symptoms with autoimmune that overlap.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
Which is another reason it takes so long to get diagnosed. But she was like, I just think you need to at least, like, get a referral, see a rheumatologist. And I did all of the initial labs. Every single one of them came back fine. Like, they were like, you don't have anything wrong. You don't have autoimmune condition. You have nothing. There was one marker, actually, it was my inflammation markers were elevated. But they were like that. You know, it could be that you're getting sick. It could be they kind of suspected maybe rheumatoid arthritis, but, like serum negative rheumatoid arthritis. And then they said like, fibromyalgia. You know, I feel like a lot of people get diagnosed with that first because they can't find anything that's wrong. So in the very beginning, I just, like, kind of. I don't know, not that I was gaslit, but I was kind of just told, like, you're fine. And that was very struggle. Like, as it started getting worse, it. It was a struggle to get doctors to listen to me. And then slowly but surely my symptoms, because, I mean, this is the way it is. For most people, I think, that are diagnosed, their symptoms usually happen first, but their labs don't ever match that until it gets, like, more severe. So that's what happened with me. And I advocated because I knew my mom had the same symptoms. And I was like, listen, my mom has it. I'm like, I have like five. Five times. I'm thinking, I think it's like, if it's a direct parent, it's like five times more likely for, like, their child to have it.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So I just kept advocating for myself. And I one, one time I switched doctors because I moved out of state. And then I saw two different rheumatologists in Texas. Once I moved to Texas. And my most recent one, she's been incredible. Like, three years ago, I started seeing her and she saw my labs, like, getting worse, and she saw my symptoms and she started piecing the puzzle together. And she basically called it lupus before I got the official diagnosis because I didn't quite meet the criteria. So she started treating me with hydroxychloroquine. And that actually can make your labs, like, not show up. And so after I had Ellie, I had still been taking my hydroxychloroquine, but I was still having symptoms. But I think it was considered mild enough that my labs, like, were still not really showing anything. So she had me come off of it. It has like a 50 day, half life. So you have to wait, like, yeah, over two months or so before you would probably get laps showing up. And then she retested everything, and it all came back, like, oh, wow, lupus. Like, she was like, I think you were masking it just enough with the medication. And then also being postpartum, I think it brought out the lupus worse. So I was able to get diagnosed, which was incredible. And I was so thankful. Like, I remember crying because I was happy that I got diagnosed, because I knew, like, I didn't want to be diagnosed, but I wanted validation. I wanted to be treated. I wanted to be able to tell, you know, doctors or what, you know, whoever would need to know. Like, hey, this is. I wanted a name for it, and I didn't have a name up to that point. It was just like, I think I have. I mean, I have something autoimmune, but I don't know what. And that was so beyond frustrating because when people ask, like, well, what's wrong with you? And you tell them you don't feel good, they're just like, well, you don't have anything. Like, you know what I mean? Like, it just doesn't. It just gives, like, so much validation when you have, like, a title for it, an actual name. People take it more seriously. So that was very exciting to finally get that. But I would say since I got the diagnosis, like, things didn't get better. Like, I thought they were gonna get better, but they didn't get better. I. I. In fact, my health got worse. Um, I got pregnant again, so I still couldn't be on medication and breastfeeding. Still can't be on medication. Um, and I think I just thought it was gonna, like, you know, be a light switch and, like, oh, everything's good. And in some ways, it is. But I feel like now I get more skepticism online. Yeah. People that don't like me are like, oh, she's probably just lying about it. And my guys, like, I could show you my. My chart.
Podcast Host
Like, it.
K. Dudley
It has the diagnosis code in there, like, not lying about it, and that's hard. So that's another reason I don't look at comments, because, you know, I'm just trying to advocate for people who struggled for years, like, I did, because you start to feel crazy. You start to feel like a hypochondriac, for sure. You get that validation. And, like, I just want to be, like, a voice for other people who are in that same position because they may not have a mom that, like, has it that can help push them along. I was blessed to have that. But, yeah, I just want to keep pushing, you know, like, be a voice for Lupus. As I've been getting more into lupus.org so I could, you know, help with fundraisers. And I'm actually speaking on Saturday at a conference in Dallas, my first public speaking thing. I'm very nervous. Oh, my gosh.
Podcast Co-Host
Not you.
K. Dudley
No. We get, like, millions of views, but it's not the same as getting on a stage and talking.
Podcast Co-Host
Sure.
K. Dudley
In a microphone. So I'm very nervous about that. But I'm excited because I'm. I feel like if I'm gonna look at having this, like, in one way, it's. I was obvious I was given Lupus so that I could be the voice for other people, because I feel like not enough people talk about it. There's no, like, nobody. Like, so many people don't understand what it is. Like, the amount of people. I didn't even realize it, but now being on social media, the amount of people that comment and DM us every day, and they're like, what's lupus? I have no idea what that is, and I just feel like more people need to talk about it.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, that's so true. Especially I feel like really, this whole pregnancy has really opened my eyes to a lot of women's health. Obviously, I've a woman, and I feel like being a woman woman and trying to seek medical advice sometimes can be so hard because our bodies go through so much stuff, but also because they're so little testing that's has been done in the past, and we're just now starting to finally, like, have women in trial groups for medications and, like, just, like, crazy things that I just assumed was, like, a normal thing, but it's not.
K. Dudley
It's not. It's not. And, like, it's funny you say that, because I was recently diagnosed as an adult with adhd.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
And this is another reason that I blink, by the way. I'm not trying to, like, use excuses, but I'm like, I sometimes will be talking and then flatline. I don't know what I'm saying, but I knew something was, like, up. Like, for especially postpartum. It's like, it got worse after I had my babies, but working and, like, doing brand deals where I have to remember, like, a cta, I'm like, the amount of times tay and I have to refilm something because I'm like, what's the percentage off again? Like, I'll just. One second he'll tell me It. And the next second, I forget it. So I finally decided I was gonna get tested. And as a child, I only knew boys that had it. I didn't know any girls that had it. And in fact, like, doctors would never even, like, look at girls and say, oh, there's a chance she has that. Like, it was so rare to find doctors that would do that. And I just really thought, like, if I wasn't bouncing off the walls, there's no way I would have adhd. So my parents never looked into it. I mean, I saw a counselor growing up for reasons. For other, you know, for separate reasons than adhd, obviously, but I saw a counselor, never suspected it.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
But I struggled, like, mentally. And, I mean, I was. I know that my mom would probably disagree, but I feel like I was a really bad kid in a lot of ways, and it sucks knowing I could have been helped for so many years. Like, I just had to live like that and think I was just, like, different, you know? Like, I. I struggled with school. I didn't graduate, which is something I don't think I've. I've never really talked about that. But a lot of people. I think. I don't know the percentage exactly, but it's super common with people with ADHD to not finish school. Like, get your. I did get my gd, but to not finish college. I didn't finish college. I went to school. Actually started going to nursing school. My mom was a nurse, and I didn't finish. And so I feel like I always would start things and then I would fail. Like, I failed everything growing up. I failed so many things, and it wasn't until I started, like, doing this as a job that I was trying to, like, remember things, and I couldn't remember them that I finally decided to get tested. And I'll never forget, this has only been a couple months ago, so, I mean, I haven't forgotten yet, but I will never forget. He called me and he was like, I don't think this is going to come to us as a surprise to you, but it's very obvious you have adhd. I was like, okay, cool. So that was, like, again, validating, because then it was like, I had an answer for all the things, but it sucks that they didn't look at girls.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
Because I had. I. I feel like my childhood was robbed in a way because I didn't get looked at. Like, I just. I don't know. It sucks.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah. No, I think the average age, I could be wrong. So don't quote me on this. But I think the average age that women get diagnosed with ADHD is like, around 40. Like, it's some, like, crazy sad. I'm one of my friends is. She's. She's a therapist and she specializes in adhd. She has ADHD herself. And we had her on the podcast, like, probably season one. But she literally was telling me these stats, and I was like, it's just.
Sponsor Voice
It's so crazy.
K. Dudley
It's crazy. Like, when I started sharing about it, this is. This is another reason it's so annoying to me. But I would. I was sharing about the testing process and, like, that I thought I had it and I never talked about it. So I think people were like, why is she trying to jump on this trend of having adhd? I'm like, guys, you don't understand what this has done to my entire life. Like, there's so much more that I don't share on social media. But once I got tested and I shared it, people were like, this is just a trend. Like, everybody's getting diagnosed with 80. I. Everybody has a little ADHD. Like, that's not true. I hate when people say that everybody has symptoms of ADHD sometimes. Like, maybe your. Your brain is a little, like, clustered or whatever, but like, they would say, like, oh, well, that's just being a mom for you. And I'm like, no, it's not. I wasn't a mom in school. I wasn't a mom when I was a kid. So that's frustrating. I think that's happening because people are not like women. There's like an increase of women getting diagnosed in adulthood now. Like, suddenly getting, like. People think it's being overdiagnosed. I think it was under diagnosed and now people are finally exactly acknowledging it. And so people that don't have it are just like, yeah, sure. Like, you know what I mean? Like, it.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So it does suck. And again, it's like, I feel like women just get so, like, they get gaslit when it comes to medical stuff. And you just have to keep advocating for yourself because, yeah, there's a lot of crappy doctors out there. I had a doctor when I was trying to find out if I had lupus, and I went to her and I was like, I. It hurts when I breathe in. In the mornings. Like, specifically in the mornings, I wake up and I try to breathe in, and my chest is like. It's like sharp pain. And she was like, I mean, if I could help you or if I could. She said, if I could help you, I would Help my grandson. He has asthma. Take your inhaler. I mean, it was like, literally, because I do have asthma. I was like, this isn't asthma, though. It was. She just completely blew me off. She's like, if I could help you, I would help my grandson who has asthma. But, like, there's nothing you can do. I was like, this isn't asthma. Like, I left that office crying. I was. And I never went back to her again, obviously. But it's just like doctors like that exist and it sucks because they don't listen, especially if you're a woman.
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Podcast Co-Host
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Podcast Co-Host
That's why it's so important too for people with platforms to share about this stuff. So I'm so thankful that you're like willing and like willing to be open and honest and share about this stuff because it is really important. And I feel like I've learned a lot about myself and I know a lot of my friends have learned about themselves just from people sharing on the Internet like I've done. I did like a solo episode, just me talking about like first trimester stuff and how I was feeling. And I have actually never received so many messages even still, it was like over a month ago just from women being like, I've never heard someone like talk about it like this before. And it's, it's just really important that we do that. And I feel like lucky that kind of like you said, like you like having the mindset of like you were given lupus to like you know, have this platform and to talk about it and to share about it. And that's such, that's such an amazing mindset. Thank you to have so I'm proud of you for having that. What advice would you give women or men, people out there listening that are feeling similar to how you have felt multiple times in the past? Stuck trying to advocate for themselves but not being heard.
K. Dudley
I would say don't give up because you know your body better than a doctor who spends 20 minutes with you, who's late to the appointment. Like you're showing up on time, you're living with Yourself every day, and they walk in after making you wait 30 minutes, and they're like, oh, you're fine. Like, they're never going to know. Like, they're looking at labs. They're A good doctor will look at labs, and then they'll look at your symptoms and piece it together. But a lot of doctors don't do that, unfortunately. And so you know yourself better than anyone else does. You're your biggest fan, you're your biggest advocate, and you just have to. Don't. Don't give up on yourself. Like, you know, and if you know, then keep pushing. You know, see a different doctor if you have to. If they're blowing you off, like, doc, go to a different doctor. Like, what's stopping you? You know?
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah. No, that's so good. Yeah, that's great. I love all of that. Still being in postpartum, I'm curious if there are any parts of yourself that you're rediscovering or maybe protecting more now, as mom, as k. As a woman, is there anything that after, you know, having your baby six months ago, you're relearning about yourself or maybe since your diagnosis, like, maybe you're going into how you approach life a little differently, like, protecting a little part of yourself differently.
K. Dudley
Yeah, I think before I didn't put myself. I. I didn't care about myself enough. Everything. Like, my children are my world, and they're obviously like, the top of my. My world in my life, but like I said earlier, like, they have to have a mentally stable mom. And I think I. Especially going through this second pregnancy, I've really tried to prioritize, like, my mental health, making sure that I'm a good parent for them. At the end of the day, everything I do is for them, but also, like, just caring about myself. Like, there's this trend going around that's like, getting my pink back. I don't know if you've seen that, but I think so many moms, we just. We. We put so much into our children that we forget that we're also living this life for the first time. And this is the only life we get. Like, I think about that all the time with my parents. I'm like, they did their best, and they're still doing their best. They're living this year of. Of life for the first time. And, you know, you never get these years back. Like, you really have to soak all of it in and just, like, think about yourself, too. I guess. I guess that's like, my biggest thing is also Caring about myself more.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah, I love that last little. I'm obsessed with these baby sounds that
K. Dudley
are coming out literally going crazy.
Podcast Co-Host
No, I'm literally. I doubt that. Like, I doubt that the mic is
K. Dudley
picking it up, but she's found her voice, so she likes to scream.
Podcast Co-Host
I'm obsessed with it, so it's literally my favorite thing. I'm loving it. It's good. It's good practice for me, hearing the baby sounds, getting used to it. Last little thing I want to talk about is your brand that you recently launched. Um, can you tell our lemon drops a little bit about it?
K. Dudley
Yes. So I recently launched the brand hey. New. Which is. Hey, nutrition. Um, we started with protein bars, so we with hopes to expand into other, like, nutrition. Like, we're also looking at doing like, a daily gummy. Those are like, really? And right now, people love the easy, breezy, like, just like, I love.
Podcast Co-Host
I love a chew.
K. Dudley
You know what I mean? Just like, to be able to. And it tastes good, you know? So that's kind of like, without saying it, but we are kind of, like, working on that right now. But we just. I really wanted something because having lupus, like, I'm not going to claim that I'm the best eater. Like, I eat things in moderation that are not probably the best for me and I could do without. But I really struggled finding, like, a protein bar that was good for me and didn't make me feel like, like, bloated and, like, flared. I feel like there's so, like, a lot, so many protein bars taste like candy bars. Like, they're not good for you. People think that because it says protein on it, it's good for you. And that doesn't. That's not true. But then it was like, on the opposite, there would be protein bars that were good for you, but they tasted horrible.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So that was kind of like what inspired this was that I really wanted something that tasted good but was healthy. And I think it tastes good. It's inspired by my protein ball recipe, actually. So I would make protein balls because I didn't like, like, any protein bars on the mark market that were good for you. And I would have so many people that were like, you know, I want your protein bar or ball recipe. So I was like, what if we just like, like use this, like, recipe, this idea and, like, make it into a bar? And that's kind of where that came from. But I just. I also felt like a lot of the bars on the market were so, like, they market towards people in the Gym, they market towards, like, bodybuilders and people who are super, super fit. And not everybody is, like, going to the gym every day and like, trying to, you know, have.
Podcast Co-Host
We're not Gaines's life over here.
K. Dudley
Yeah. Like zero percent body fat. Like, a lot of people just need something in the middle of the day or when they're dropping their kids off at school and they forgot breakfast or on the airplane. You know, kids. Like, I wanted the bars to be soft enough, but also you wouldn't feel guilty giving them to your kids.
Podcast Co-Host
Yes.
K. Dudley
So my whole motto with, with these bars is that they're inclusive to everybody. And in order to make them inclusive to everybody, we made them dairy free, gluten free, vegan. Um, they're free of the top nine allergens. Um, there's no sugar, alcohols, no stevia. A lot of people don't like stevia. I personally think it tastes gross. Um, yeah. And I feel like it also, like, upsets a lot of people's stomach. Um, and then, you know, just making it taste good but healthy. Um, so we had to make it inclusive to everybody. And I feel like we really accomplished that. I'm really excited. We're about to drop our. So we've done one launch and it sold out in under 24 hours, which we did not anticipate. And we're going to double. Like our. We actually are doing another run in like a week and a half or no, a week from now.
Podcast Co-Host
So when this is live, there will be another.
K. Dudley
There will be another launch. Well, the bars will be made. We're launching like a few days later. Yeah. But this next one we doubled and we're going to keep doubling as long as everything's doing good. And we have some new flavors that we're about to bring out. But we did tweak this second launch like these. The second batch is even better. So, like the first one, I felt like we pushed the vegan bar space to its max. Like, if you're gonna take. If you're gonna add sweetness, like, you have to take something else out. Like, yeah, you have a 55 grand bar, you're gonna have to like, it's like playing Jenga and it's very hard to make it good and t, like healthy and taste good without. Like. Like you have to sacrifice somewhere for sure. And I didn't like that idea. I was like, I don't like sacrificing. And I did feel like there could be improvements with my first run. So the second time. So we went up to Utah the other day. And we spent an entire day with our food scientist, and I was just, like, testing, like, the proteins by themselves. We found out that our protein we originally were using, the specific pea protein, was, like, drying out our bars. And it was supposedly the best protein on the market, like, pea protein. And I tried it next to the one that we ended up going with, and you could tell just visually looking at them, that the protein we originally used, it was more expensive and it was better, but it wasn't. It was, like, soaking up all. Like, you could just see it was, like, dry compared. So we made, like, little tweaks. We ended up upping the fiber, lowering the sugar, but making it a little more sweet. So I was like, I wish we would have done this with the first launch. But it's kind of cool because we have, like, our whole community is on. Like, we're bringing them on the journey with us. Yeah. You know, no brand is perfect the first time it runs. And I think listening to your community and seeing, like, what they felt about the bars, what they'd like to see, I think that's so important. So that's kind of what we did. And I'm really excited. So I love that.
Podcast Co-Host
I need to try. I need to try them because I've been on that protein journey, too. I feel like just especially being pregnant, I'm trying to, like, make sure I am getting enough protein. And also, I want to, like, have food that's filling, that's good for me because I consume so much food right now.
K. Dudley
That's okay. It's fuel. You need to be doing that for your baby.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah. No, I love that. Okay, let's head into our last little segment. It's called Lemon Seven. Seven questions. You could amplifier them, or if you have a story to tell, feel free to share.
Podcast Host
Number one is what movie or song
Podcast Co-Host
title best describes your mental health today?
K. Dudley
I think the Pursuit of Happiness. I love that because I feel like my life lately, there's been so many things that have made me feel like I want to give up and, like, it's not working out. My health is one of them. Like, my body's like, nope. Like, I'm not gonna. You're not gonna feel good today. And I think I just have to. I just, like, tell myself, like, I just gotta keep going. And I feel like that movie really, like, it kind of, like, gives that. It's like he keeps, you know, trying despite all the challenges. So I feel like that's. That's a good one.
Podcast Co-Host
That's special.
Podcast Host
Number two is how open are you
Podcast Co-Host
with people in your life when struggling with Taylor?
K. Dudley
I'm very open. Um, I've learned to be very open, like I said earlier, but with other people in my life, I don't tend to share as much, especially online. I, I, I'm very private despite how much we share online. But like, I just feel like people aren't going to get it a lot of times and maybe I need to be more open with people. But I feel like my biggest supporter is Tay and he's, he's my best friend. So he knows me, he gets me, he knows when I'm upset. Yeah. So yeah, definitely with him. I am.
Podcast Host
Number three is if you could follow
Podcast Co-Host
three social media accounts, what would they be?
K. Dudley
Oh my goodness. See, I don't consume content a lot right now.
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah.
K. Dudley
So I don't know, like a specific like Instagram account. But I think I would definitely want somebody who like makes me feel like I can keep going. So somebody that helps me feel motivated, like a motivational type account. And then let me think somebody who makes me laugh because I think that's super important at the end of the day, like you have to have, like, you have to laugh, you have to enjoy, you know, like a good comedy show. Movie is always good, you know, so one that makes me laugh and then probably fam like a family member to stay in touch with my family.
Podcast Co-Host
That's sweet. Number four is, what is your favorite form of self care?
K. Dudley
Skincare. For sure.
Podcast Co-Host
I need to try that oil you were talking about or whatever.
K. Dudley
The glow serum. Yeah, you should try it. I have one here if you want it.
Podcast Co-Host
Well, no, I'm not gonna.
K. Dudley
No, I have, I have like a million at the house. I have one with me. It's just, it's my new. So I did like two sizes.
Podcast Co-Host
Okay.
K. Dudley
And I just dropped my travel. It's like travel size. It's to give people not the three month commitment if they just want to try it. And it's like a month and a half commitment. But I have it, I just opened it yesterday.
Podcast Co-Host
Okay, well, if you're not gonna use it, I might take it. No, you should, because I've been trying to find, I've been trying to find skin care things that are also pregnancy safe, that also agrees my skin. So that's been really fun.
K. Dudley
It's a good one.
Sponsor Voice
Fun for me.
Podcast Co-Host
Number five is, what is the most misunderstood thing about you?
K. Dudley
Probably that I feel fine because I'm doing a lot of things but I don't actually feel Fine. Just because I'm, like, showing up, it doesn't mean that I'm actually fine. Like, I'm just pushing myself to the limit a lot of times. And I think that's. That's definitely the one that I get most often is like, oh, she's fine on trips. Like, she's fine to go do this. I'm like, guys, like, I do it when I need to do it. Like, that's why when I'm home, I don't do anything. I'm on the couch, like, because I pushed myself for the last week and a half, you know?
Podcast Co-Host
Yeah. For sure. That I love that answer so much, especially because people are so quick to leave comments and things and have opinions on social media. And we also forget that it's important for us to do that, to push ourselves to do things, because, you know, I'm very thankful that I have the type of personality where I am stubborn and I'm like, even if I'm not feeling it, I'm like, no, I'm gonna do this. Like, I know I'm just gonna.
K. Dudley
That's.
Podcast Co-Host
I'm not gonna feel good, but I'm gonna do it.
K. Dudley
Yeah.
Podcast Co-Host
And I'm so thankful because, yes, like, especially now, being pregnant, my body. I'm learning that I can't expect my body to do the same things that I would not pregnant. But it's just. I'm so thankful that I push myself. Like, I've never. I've never gone to an event and been upset that I did. And even though I'm like, I don't want to have to drive. I don't want to get ready. I don't. Like, what if there's no one I want to mingle with? Like, I. Every single time. And every time I get in the car and I'm, like, about to leave to go do something, I'm like, do I really want to do this? And then I come home and I'm, like, on the phone to say. I'm, like, there, so. And so was there. And then this, this, this. Like, so I just have to remind myself that every time, like, I need to push myself to do it, even if I'm not feeling good.
K. Dudley
Yep. I feel like it's a really good way to show your children, too. Like, like, my girls are going to grow up and they're going to see. Like, we don't just. We don't give up.
Podcast Co-Host
Number six is who's had the most positive impact on your mental health?
K. Dudley
My kids. My kids. Because at the end of the day, no matter how bad I feel, mentally or physically, they remind me who. They remind me why I do it. They remind me what really matters, you know, at the end of the day, like, they're my family matters the most. So sweet.
Podcast Co-Host
Okay, last question. If you can go back to one moment in your life, what moment would that be? And what would you say to yourself?
K. Dudley
So this one's going to be a little like, oh, I'm not going to cry, probably. Tay and I had, like, a controversy a few years ago, and I think in that moment, I felt like that was it, and, like, it would never get better. And I think I would just tell myself that at the end of the day, like, nobody knows us the way we know us, and nobody. Nobody will ever get it, you know, because they didn't live. They don't live our life. And as long as we know the truth, that's all that matter matters. I told myself I wasn't gonna cry, but, yeah, I would just say that, like, I. I would tell myself that I got through it and that it gets better and that at the end of the day, like, I'm gonna have so many people that support us at the end of the day, like, they don't care, you know, they support us. They know that people say things online, people do things online that are mean, people that know you do things that are mean to you because they don't like that you have anything going on that's good anymore. So, yeah, I think I would just tell myself to, like, stay strong and, like, not let it get to me, because I was very mental. Like, not. That was probably the lowest point in my life, was in that little era, so.
Podcast Co-Host
Well, I think I've learned so much about strength from you today, and especially not even knowing that that was something that you've experienced. And I have friends that have experienced, probably had similar experiences, too. It's very hard, controversies and things online. But I am just so proud of you for, like, showing up, for advocating for yourself, for showing your kids, like, what strength looks like as a mom, especially because you have girls. And, like, I think that that's just really special. And you should be so proud of yourself for literally, like, everything and also, like, literally starting a brand, like, on top of everything that you have going on. Like, the fact that you did that, too, is really awesome.
K. Dudley
It's my newest baby, so I love that.
Podcast Co-Host
Well, I hope you leave here, like, proud of yourself and, like, really just taking a moment to, like, take that in.
K. Dudley
Yeah, I'm glad because I was having the same moment the other day. I was like, I don't know if I can do any of this. Like, the travel and just there's a lot when you don't feel good. But I'm glad it's like you said, like, now that I've done it, I'm so glad that I pushed myself to do this. So, yeah. Thank you for having me. I just feel so honored.
Podcast Co-Host
Oh, my gosh.
K. Dudley
That I got to talk with you today.
Podcast Co-Host
Love it. Thanks for coming.
Podcast Summary
Episode: Kay Dudley: The Reality of Motherhood
Hosts: Taylor Lautner & Taylor Lautner
Guest: Kay Dudley
Date: May 13, 2026
In this heartfelt and honest episode, The Squeeze dives deep into the complexities of motherhood, mental health, chronic illness, social media, and personal growth with guest Kay Dudley. Known for her transparency and humor as one half of the viral “K and Taylor” couple, Kay shares her experiences with postpartum life, advocating for her health, managing lupus and a new business, and the nuances of parenting and marriage in the public eye. The conversation touches on self-worth, the ups and downs of social media, seeking and providing support, and finding strength in vulnerability.
Pregnancy Differences
Pregnancy and Social Media
Being Honest About Discomfort
Romanticizing Everyday Moments
Navigating Changes After Kids
Support & Communication
Feeding Choices
Postpartum Depression
Adult ADHD Diagnosis (39:23 - 43:41)
Medical Dismissal
On Validation After Years of Seeking a Diagnosis:
“I remember crying because I was happy that I got diagnosed, because I knew, like, I didn't want to be diagnosed, but I wanted validation.” – Kay (34:49)
On Prioritizing Marriage While Parenting:
“Your kids really, in my opinion, should not come before your marriage. You have to balance it.” – Kay (23:33)
On Breastfeeding Controversy:
“A fed baby is best in my opinion. A mentally sane mom is so much better than a mom who is just mentally, like, struggling every single day.” – Kay (27:45)
On Medical Gaslighting:
“You know your body better than a doctor who spends 20 minutes with you.” – Kay (51:14)
On Social Media and Criticism:
“No one single person should be seeing that much about people's opinions about themselves or how they're parenting ... a lot of people have really mean, nasty opinions about people.” – Kay (13:20)
On Entrepreneurship:
“We had to make it inclusive to everybody. And I feel like we really accomplished that. I'm really excited.” – Kay (56:46)
| Topic | Timestamp (MM:SS) | |---------------------------------------------|----------------------| | Lupus diagnosis journey | 32:18 – 38:42 | | Motherhood perceptions and postpartum | 06:25 – 11:38 | | Marriage, romanticizing moments | 21:24 – 24:32 | | Breastfeeding & judgment/mental health | 26:27 – 29:30 | | Social media boundaries | 11:38 – 16:13 | | Adult ADHD diagnosis | 39:23 – 43:41 | | Medical system and patient advocacy | 44:35 – 51:14 | | Hey Nutrition: business journey | 54:24 – 59:49 | | Lightning round ("Lemon Seven") | 60:05 – 67:34 | | Reflection on controversy and resilience | 65:16 – 67:43 |
The episode underscores the importance of self-advocacy, resilience, and community in the face of chronic illness, parenthood, and internet scrutiny. Kay’s vulnerability, practical advice, and authentic storytelling offer comfort and solidarity for anyone feeling unseen in their health, parenting, or mental health journeys. The conversation is a reminder that a “fed baby is best,” self-care isn’t selfish, and that sometimes, the greatest strength lies in asking for—and accepting—help.
For anyone seeking real talk on the everyday realities of motherhood, health, and living publicly while staying true to yourself, this episode is both grounding and empowering.