← The Thyroid (and Hormone) Fixer Podcast: Thyropause, Menopause, Metabolism and How to Fix It
The Thyroid (and Hormone) Fixer Podcast: Thyropause, Menopause, Metabolism and How to Fix It
528. Unfiltered REAL Talk About Sex, Amazing Orgasms, Libido and More with Intimacy Expert Susan Bratton
00:55:14
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- [00:01]
Dr. Amy
Since the release of Metabolism Fixer, we have been bombarded by stories of people just raving about it and the results that they're getting. So what we're seeing across the board, control of appetite. And without the use of expensive GLPs. Because metabolism contains that patented trademark ingredient Suppressa has a boatload of studies behind it reducing appetite by 69%. We have heard massive reports thanking us. Thank you from Metabolism Fixer. Because finally I have control over my appetite once and for all. I'm not binging, I'm not overeating. And that's really half the battle. But beyond that, we have to get the metabolism up. We have to get your metabolism up. How do we do that? Metabolism Fixer contains T2. Now it also contains purple tea and green tea, which both increase your metabolic furnace. But T2 is really the key. That forgotten thyroid hormone that increases your basal metabolic rate stimulates brown adipose tissue. That's why you're jumping into cold plunges people to stimulate that brown adipose tissue, turn the white squishy fat brown, make it more metabolically active, protect your muscles. T2 acts like an exercise mimetic. So it's just like you're going to the gym. This is what gives us that better metabolism. So that we're burning fat while we're just sitting around doing nothing. So you don't have to starve yourself to lose weight. You don't have to work out three hours a day to lose weight. By adding a metabolism fixer, you're going to have better appetite control. You're going to have nice steady energy through the day. That's another thing that T2 does bonus. And you're going to have a better overall basal metabolism. The amount of body fat and energy that you are burning at rest and that is what is going to ignite your metabolic furnace and that is what is going to get that weight off of you once and for all. So if you need better appetite control and you know you just want a better metabolism and you don't want to carry around extra weight, Add in Metabolism Fixer. Just one scoop a day. That's all you need, one scoop a day. It will start kicking in very shortly to control your appetite. Studies show about two week onset, but we've had people notice that appetite control kick in within a day or two. Add in one scoop Metabolism Fixer, you are going to thank me that you saved hundreds if not thousands of dollars not using a glp, but using this. Yummy. Throw it in your water flavors your water. Oh my God, it tastes like Tang. Metabolism Fixer every day. Welcome to the Thyroid Fixer podcast. I'm your host, Dr. Amy, and we're diving deep into the world of hormones, especially for all you fierce women in perimenopause and menopause and everyone struggling with hypothyroidism. So if you are battling weight gain, you're feeling like shedding those pounds is an impossible. If you're dealing with plummeting energy levels, gut wrenching fatigue, or a libido that seems to have left town, then you're in the right place. And let's not even start on the hair loss. If these symptoms are sounding all too familiar. You have found your tribe. My goal is to educate, empower, and shake up your world. Remember, I want you to embrace every inch of that badass woman that you truly are. So if you're ready to dive in and fix things, let's go. Today, I'm bringing back my dear friend, Susan Bratton, who is intimacy expert to millions. She is a champion and advocate for all those who desire lifelong intimacy and passion and good sex. So I came to you all to get your questions on sex, libido, orgasms, how to increase your intimacy in your relationship, sex toys. All the things are an open discussion on this episode of the Thyroid Fixer podcast. So if you're timid and you just don't care about sex, don't listen to this. But if you are a human being with a heartbeat and a pulse, you really need to listen to this because beyond just pleasure and that, that moment of orgasm, healthy sexual desire and a healthy, intimate sexual relationship with passion expands our health span, our lifespan, our sex span, as Susan calls it. This is one that really everyone needs. And it doesn't matter your age. I don't care if you're 100 years old, you can still be having deep, amazing, passionate sex. So let's have some fun with Susan Bratton and I. Susan, you are one of the most amazing women I know, but especially in the area of sex and female orgasm and actually having true pleasure and deep, intimate relationships. So that's what we're going to dive into today. And I actually asked my community what their sex questions were, what their libido questions were. So we're gonna get into their actual questions today, which I know you're excited about.
- [05:12]
Susan Bratton
Oh, God, I love this so much. Are you kidding me? Like, I was already looking forward seeing you because I love you so much. And now we get on the to do the show and you're like, I've got some audience questions and I was like, oh God, can we just do that for the whole episode? That's like, that's so my sweet spot. I love it so much. So yay, double wonderful. Amy Hare.
- [05:34]
Dr. Amy
Giving people what they want, it's answering what is on the top of their mind. So yeah, that's exactly what we're going to get into. First, I just want to lay the groundwork of libido because this is something that I hear all the time, especially from my patients in my audience. They have no libido. Libido, libido. And they all think it's tied to testosterone. Now you and I love our testosterone. It's very, very important. It's a component of a libido or a sex drive. But what else comes into play when we're talking about libido?
- [06:09]
Susan Bratton
Yeah, well, for most people, you know, you have to think about libido as the other side of the same coin of your health. When your health is compromised in any way, your libido is going to be lower. That also includes just general mitochondrial function and energy. And as you move into middle age, which is where we get most commonly that people are like, wow, my, my libido's really on the rocks right now. That's because a lot of other functions are on the rocks too. You know, we're starting to have energy loss. We, nine o' clock seems like a far away time to get to for bedtime. And yes, you know, we're just, we're not moving as much as we used to. Obviously there's also a lot more stress in our world right now. You know, I, I, I mean, I've been on this earth going on 64 years and it's never been a more stressful environment. And that takes its toll as well. There's really just vascular retraction and there and then from vascular retraction when you're, when your blood system, when all your arteries and your veins and your capillaries aren't getting a lot of kind of high intensity training or push, they start to retract. And when they retract, the nerves retract. So then you get sensation loss, you get thinning of the vaginal tissue from estrogen dipping. Sex can become painful. It's more difficult to achieve orgasm. You feel like maybe your clitoris and your labia are shrinking. You know, the vanishing clit is a thing. So all of that happens. But I think there's something even bigger. I think that by the time we get into our 40s and our 50s, we have had sex so many times in the way that we think sex is supposed to be. But frankly, the only images of sex that we ever see are what I would consider to be religious, patriarchal imagery, masculine oriented sexual imagery. And not just in pornography, which is of course what that's based on is creating content for the male gaze which insidiously seeps into everything that Hollywood pumps out. Because Hollywood is also run by men, right? Studios aren't run by women, they're run by men. And so even the depictions of romantic, sensual sex are. He rips off her pants, she's still wearing her top because we can't even show boobs. And you know, he plunges into her and she has this incredible orgasm just like that. And then we think there's something wrong with us that we don't have that spontaneous desire response and we're responsive desire. We have the same amount of erectile tissue as men, but it takes us 20 minutes at a minimum to get that same blood flowing into all the nooks and crannies of our genital erectile tissue systems as it does the three straight shot tubes that our male body partners have. They wake up horny. They're horny all the time. They're ready to go. We're not. We need more romance, more seduction, more full body touch to be ready. There's so much difference between our biological wiring. Then everything we see is male oriented pleasure that we don't even know that we've been swimming in the soup of just masculine sexual, you know, expression and we think there's something wrong with us. So in the, in the combination of stuff, be shrinking and atrophying with the combination of it be stressful with the combination of, I've had sex 5,000 times and never once experienced. What would it actually be like if I could have matriarchal female pleasure led sexuality? What would that be like? So why wouldn't women be like, I'm kind of done with it, you know. You know, like, I don't know. Now there are women who look at the atrophying of their vaginas and go, okay, I'm going to do all, I'm going to throw everything at it and I'm going to try and, you know, keep it all going. I'm going to do my blood flow supplements, I'm going to do my gains wave treatments with acoustic wave. I'm going to, you know, do red light therapy intravaginally with my vagina device. I'm going to have frequent Solo pleasuring so I can activate my orgasmic pleasure. I'm going to slow everything down and stop putting pressure on myself, and I'm going to have way more. I mean, even this. Amy, foreplay and sex, that's a patriarchal construct because it's a religious patriarchal construct. I'm not against religion. I like to support everyone's religious choices. But when you realize that if sex means intercourse and sex is for procreation only for a lot of people, people come out of purity cult. They come out of trauma, you know, all kinds of things. And if foreplay is like the appetizer and the main course is intercourse, and you're rushing to do it, and you're rushing foreplay. If it were matriarchal, it would be the opposite direction. It would be, we're gonna do a whole bunch of all kinds of foreplay. I want to be kissed. I want to be held. I want to be stroked.
- [11:31]
Dr. Amy
I want to.
- [11:31]
Susan Bratton
I want to be touched. I want you to tell me three things you love about me and make them different Every time we make love. I want there to be music and lighting. I want you to adore me and worship me. I want you to give me a yoni massage. I want you to orally pleasure me. And then when I'm begging for it, of course I would like to have intercourse, but it's often the opposite. You end up like, well, let's go and get it done, because he's going to drive me nuts if I don't do it. So it ends up at our displeasure. And after a while, who wouldn't want to give up? Who wouldn't feel like their libido is depressed from all that cultural travesty that's been rained down upon the female body for generations, Right? Oh, I'm such a bright light today, aren't I?
- [12:20]
Dr. Amy
But no, you're making sense of it. You know, I mean, if women's light bulbs aren't going off and they're not making the connection, I don't know what will. Because, I mean, everything that you said. Yes, from the. The health issues, 100%. If your estrogen's low, your vagina is going to dry up. If your testosterone is low, you're probably not going to have the blood flow and the libido that you actually want. But if you're stressed out and if you have been brought up and experienced nothing but those patriarchal ways or. Or even sex that is learned from pornography, and that's essentially what our kids.
- [12:57]
Susan Bratton
Are learning right now, breaks My heart. I know.
- [12:59]
Dr. Amy
That's the only way they're learning right now.
- [13:01]
Susan Bratton
I know.
- [13:02]
Dr. Amy
Yeah, yeah. So you're making. You're making complete sense of all of this. And I love that, that correlation. So you mentioned blood flow to the area, and I just told you off air that for the first time, I tried a lot of Cialis. I had interviewed Dr. Elizabeth Yurth, and she was talking about this low dosialis for men and women and how it helps their heart and cardiovascular system. And of course, there's that nitric oxide component to it. And I said to her, I'm like, well, can this actually enhance sexual arousal and help with a woman's low libido? And she was, oh, yeah, yeah. So I got my script, tried a half today, and I mean, within an hour or so, I was like, honey, you gotta meet me in the bedroom, like, now, because it's time. I mean, it really did enhance everything, and that drove up my libido.
- [13:50]
Susan Bratton
Yeah, well. And don't you think it's interesting that it's so easy for us to be like, honey, meet me in the bedroom now. And they're like, let's go, mama. They're ready to go all the time because of testosterone and because it's wiring. Because when women come into estrus, even after menopause, we are cyclical, but when we start to ovulate, like, we can almost not be controlled, you know, And. And so it's. They have to be ready because they can't tell when we're ovulating. We don't know half the time. So half the time they don't know either. Most of the time they don't know. So they are born ready. That is a hallmark of. Of the masculine wiring. The other thing that's interesting about lotos cialis, I think it's particularly good for men who are starting to have erectile dysfunction, who are losing their nighttime erections. I really like it for that. But one of the things that I don't like is when pharmaceuticals become crutches. And so what we're. What's really happening with that lotos cialis is that your nitric oxide systems, your nitric oxide system stores are not full. You need to have full power in your nitric oxide batteries. Essentially, we have multiple fault tolerant, redundant nitric oxide production systems in our body, but the only way that we can fully charge them is by eating leafy green vegetables, beetroot, dill, cabbage, arugula, romaine, kale, chard, you name it. And the problem is that Our soils from agribusiness are now depleted of nitrogen. We have nitrogen depleted soil. If there's no nitrogen in the soil, there's no nitrogen in the plants. So when the plants are depleted, we could eat all the leafy greens. We could have leafy greens at every meal and still be a little low. So one of my best selling supplement. Because you and I are both supplement formulators, my area of expertise is sexual vitality supplements. And I make a nitric oxide formula that is actually food derived. And it's interesting because it's called flow nitric oxide booster. And it's interesting because I derive the nitric oxide from watermelon rind, literally powdered watermelon rind. The watermelon's Latin name is citrullus vulgaris. The vulgar citral. The vulgar citrulline. Yes, it's wonderful. It's like, it's so luscious and rich and ripe. They call it vulgar. Vulgar. I mean, that's like, that's patriarchal oppression right there, you know that they named a watermelon something vulgar. It's not vulgar to be ripe. Luscious and juicy. Talk about oppression. It's. It cracks me up. So. But the problem is if you have to eat a lot of watermelon, it's very high sugar content, so it's not that good for you. But the rind is actually more rich in the resources. So for people who are like, I don't necessarily want to take a supplement, what could I do? I say pickle watermelon rind and you'll get a fermented probiotic, nitric oxide rich, wonderful thing. So I mean, that's literally an option. But for some people, they're like, I ain't gonna can.
- [17:05]
Dr. Amy
No, I'm just gonna take a pill.
- [17:07]
Susan Bratton
I'm gonna take a supplement. And I like food derived supplements rather than chemically generated supplements, if I can get them.
- [17:14]
Dr. Amy
Right. Or medication. Exactly.
- [17:16]
Susan Bratton
Or a medication.
- [17:17]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [17:18]
Susan Bratton
So you want to top up your nitric oxide stores and the best time to do it is actually at night and before lovemaking. So a lot of times when guys who are the most dependent on PDE5 inhibitors, which is what cialis levitra viagra are, and what that does is it leaves the nitric oxide pathway open so you get more. More blood flow. You get more blood flow everywhere, which is why it can give you a headache. Stuffy sinuses hangover afterward.
- [17:46]
Dr. Amy
Yes.
- [17:47]
Susan Bratton
Did you get one?
- [17:48]
Dr. Amy
Yeah. Well, no. My husband gets stuffy noses every so often when he takes Viagra.
- [17:52]
Susan Bratton
Exactly. And so if you just not top up, your nitric oxide stores yourself either through, you know, a supplementation and eating more leafy greens and beetroot and things like that, that helps. And then you're not necessarily so dependent. So guys that kind of have to take a Viagra to get hard, I put them on a penis pump, a vacuum erection device. And if it's pretty bad, I tell them to go get Gainswave treatments, which is an acoustic wave that stimulates new tissue growth and reverses atrophy. Knocks the plaque off the penile artery so that it can get more blood flow in it. We don't have the arterial issues as much because we're. Our little parts are all kind of in tiny little places, all inside our vulva. But Gainsway for women is also very good at reversing labial atrophy, clitoral atrophy, urinary incontinence, and vaginal atrophy. Okay, but the thing is that if you, if you take it sublingually, you can do a real, like the typical viagra dose is 60 milligrams. I say to guys, start taking nitric oxide, start eating all the leafy greens, start doing your hiit workouts and use your penis pump, Go get your Gainsways, and then just start cutting back on the Viagra as you regain your function, as you reverse the atrophy, and you increase the blood carrying capacity of the penis. It's the same with the vulva. We have the same amount of erectile tissue. So increasing the blood carrying capacity of the tissue means that you can take less and less and less of pharmaceuticals. And so if you take maybe 10 milligrams, crunch it up in your mouth, it's a little bitter, but it's fine. Stick it under your tongue, sublingual, it goes right into your bloodstream. It bypasses the liver instead of going into your stomach like a pill. It's faster acting, it has less side effects. You're taking a lower dose because you're remediating the source of the issue, which is functionally a loss of nitric oxide. Last two points on that is give up antibacterial mouthwash. It kills off the bacteria that convert the nitrates to nitrites. And then get rid of your proton pump inhibitors and fix your H. Pylori and your sibo and your gut issues and your shitty diet and all that white flour and sugar you're ingesting and get your stomach acid higher, not lower, so that you can convert the nitrates to nitric Oxide. So it's a very delicate spot system that can be ruined at any point along the transport. It's. It really will vastly improve cognitive function, growth of musculoskeletal tissue. If you're working out, it'll do a lot of things, including help your sex life and increase your pleasure. Because last thing I'll say on it is that we enter into. We walk around with flaccid. I'm, I'm going to use the word yoni. I like that word for the female genital system. It's a tantric lovemaking word because vulva is just the outside, vagina is just the inside, doesn't include the pleasure centers of the clitoral structures. And it's not. Those aren't comprehensive enough. Anatomical words aren't comprehensive enough. So I lean into the tantric lovemaking world and use the word yoni. Y O N I and talk about the yoni in our erectile tissue as much as our guys in our guy's penis. But when we're flaccid and not turned on, we need 20 minutes of stimulation, kissing, breast and nipple pleasuring, yoni massage, oral pleasuring, vibration from sex toys, things like that, to get the blood to flow in. And, and also those words of love and encouragement. Baby, you're so sexy. I love you so much. I'm so happy to be with you. You're so beautiful to me. I love, love making love with you. That helps us relax and get into our body. And then the blood seeps into all that tissue and expands it. So we get our lady boner. And when we get our lady boner, there's more surface area sending significantly more signals to our bottom biggest sex organ, our brain. To our. It's basically called the singular cortex where everything starts to light up because we're getting all this pleasure in all these different places because it's all plump and juicy and ripe and delicious like that watermelon. Mm.
- [22:31]
Dr. Amy
That is perfect.
- [22:32]
Susan Bratton
And makes sense, right?
- [22:34]
Dr. Amy
It totally makes sense. And I'm thinking so with testosterone, we do know with a little bit higher doses of testosterone, a woman can get an ingredient gorge clitoris. And while we don't want it to turn into a full blown clatinus like maybe a woman bodybuilder would have, right? There's nothing wrong. I think women get embarrassed when they start to see their clitoris enlarge and start to go outside of the, the vulva. Right. If I'm having my anatomy correct, right. So you have the vulva and then the clitoris sits in here, but when it protrudes outward, is that a problem? I mean, that just enhances pleasure.
- [23:11]
Susan Bratton
It's not a problem, number one. And number two, it takes a lot of testosterone to get a lady boner that big. I mean, I have literally done. I'm. As a sexual biohacker, I've been playing around with my clit in a lot of different ways.
- [23:25]
Dr. Amy
You have to. You got to be able to pass it on us, so.
- [23:27]
Susan Bratton
Exactly. I've done six PRP shots, but I've also had my own endogenous stem cells injected into my clitoral structures. And it doesn't get too. And I take testosterone. I put testosterone in my clitoris every morning, Right. And I do that as much for sensation as I do because I want the testosterone for confidence. I like that it gives me balls, you know, I want to be a bad babe, you know, And I also like it because it helps me put muscle on. In the gym. I have popping biceps and I absolutely love that. Yesterday in the gym, I did 18 band assisted pull ups and I am working on deadlifting my body weight, which is, you know, how big I am. You're the tiniest little thing. I'm a giant. I'm like £160 and I'm trying to deadlift my body weight by my 64th birthday. And. And I also like how my voice sounds. I like the kind of the timber of my voice. It suits me. So I like to have a popping clitoris. I love my lady boner. It's not too big. It doesn't look like a penis even fully erect, but I can feel it get big. I can feel my clitoral erection. The shaft becomes more pleasurable. Not just the tip, all of the crora, the legs, the vestibular bulbs, the feet of your clitoris, the perineal sponge, the urethral sponge. This is all erectile tissue and it keeps all of that in, in, you know, very good shape. It keeps you essentially meaty, really. I think testosterone is like a meaty hormone. Your whole body is meatier. Not fatter, not bigger, just stronger, more capable. So lift and heavy strength, grip, flexibility, balance, all kinds of things you want to be sailing through your midlife feeling. I love the explosion of midlife strength trainer women on social media. And I applaud every single one of us who do that work because I really think it helps us keep our sexuality, our libido, our desire, our arousal, which are three different things thrumming through life. And the longer you can have pleasurable intimacy, orgasmic intimacy. And you can keep learning how to have orgasms your whole life long. There's 20 kinds of orgasms the human body can have and they're all learned skills. Every orgasm you have, you've learned how to have. You weren't born knowing. You have learned them over time through experimentation and self pleasuring and partnered pleasuring. And so the more that you can sail into your 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, right up into your hundreds having orgasmic ecstasy, the longer, healthier, happier life you're going to live. When you can extend your sex span, you extend your health span. The neurotransmitters, the hormones, the immune function, the natural killer cells, the endorphins, the, the vascular blood flow. I mean, everything that happens with an orgasm is so it bathes your body in life giving and extending, you know, essence, if you will.
- [27:02]
Dr. Amy
Okay, so I'm going to piggyback off that. You've already answered multiple questions just in this conversation, but this one is good for you. So based on that, no issue with libido, but have extreme issue achieving orgasm, have delayed orgasm. It's almost impossible. It never used to be what hormone is lacking and or how to improve arousal and blood flow when the desire is not the problem. In all caps. I repeat, desire is not the problem. I get so sick of the medical system saying just relax and turn off your brain.
- [27:35]
Susan Bratton
Yeah, right. It sounds to me like she's got some atrophy. And I would go to the flow nitric oxide and I would do the, the gains wave treatments. Or at the worst case, if, if it's like, that's out of my budget. A lady pump. A clitoral pump is really, really a good thing. Clitoral and Volvo pumps are excellent. So just pulling the blood in so you get your nitric oxide and then you actually pump the blood flow into that tissue to kind of get the capillaries to grow back to the edges and then, and then the nerves follow so you can feel the sensation. The other thing that I would do is I would use more pleasure tools. So yoni massage to start either pleasuring yourself or having your partner give you a yoni massage using a couple of tools. There's two that I particularly like. One is called the Pulse Queen. The other is simply called Vibe. It's the dumbest name in the world, but it's a great tool. And it really depends. If you err on the side of I need more stimulation, which this listener needed more stimulation, I'd go with the Queen. People who are more sensitive and don't like a lot of stimulation. I would go with Vibe. They're both@drivedesire.com I have links to pretty much everything I talk about right there because it just makes it easy for people to go find it. But when you use the pulse plate technology that penetrates the skin and goes deep into all that erectile tissue to stimulate it during a yoni massage, it's going to trigger that blood flow. Especially if you're taking your nitric oxide supplements, it's going to trigger that blood flow deep into all those nooks and crannies, plump it up so there's more surface area sending more signals to the brain so you can feel the orgasms again and you can feel the intensity of them. And it's not. It's not a crutch. It's not going to make you reliant on it. It's actually rejuvenating those structures. It's rehab.
- [29:33]
Dr. Amy
I like it. Rehab. I like that. Putting. Putting it that way makes it make sense because it's not something that's just going to occur. It's something that we have to work at. Just like rehabilitation.
- [29:45]
Susan Bratton
Yeah. I'm really sorry that. That. Your homework. I don't know the name of the person who wrote this, but your homework is to have more exquisite orgasms. I, you know, I apologize, but that's just what you're going to have to do.
- [29:56]
Dr. Amy
You have to do. It's. It's so hard. But that's what you just have to do. So this question, it kind of flips it as well. What if it's less you and more your husband? I lost a ton of weight after getting my thyroid disease treated. And honestly, I wonder if he's still attracted to me at all. Pretty sure I. If I didn't initiate, it would never happen again.
- [30:17]
Susan Bratton
Interesting. Okay.
- [30:18]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [30:19]
Susan Bratton
So I don't. First of all, we always think it's us. It's not you. He honestly loves you. No matter what you look like, he loved you when you were bigger. He'll love you when you were smaller. He doesn't really notice the skin. He is more for the pleasure, sensation, connection, and the feeling of love that he has when you're intimate. But if he's not initiating, it's likely a couple of different things. One, he's got low testosterone and he's just lost his libido, his desire. So I would get him tested for his testosterone levels and definitely do testosterone remov replacement and get it up to the point where he feels good and the way that I like to administer testosterone, I'm not a doctor. I'm, I'm passionate. I write passionate lovemaking techniques, but I'm a science nerd. The, the thing about testosterone is you can do pellets, you can do injections, neither of which I think are, are optimal. What I like is testosterone cream that he rubs on his balls. Rub it on your balls in the morning. It goes right through the skin and goes right into the system. It's a very nice easy way to do it. He gets to play with his ball in the morning. The only downside to it is if he's not a snorer, he could become one. And that means you might have to kick him out to the other room if you haven't already. Because testosterone replacement does tend to make men snore. There are things he can do about it. It's likely not sleep apnea, it's more of a musculature kind of a thing. But he may or may not want to fix that problem. So, you know, there's double edged sword to these things. The other thing is that he could be starting to have erectile dysfunction. And so going back to put him on flow or another nitric oxide booster, give him a men's pump, a vacuum erection device. The one that I Recommend is@pumpswork.com it's also@drive desire.com. that's right, I gave you that URL. I like to give people where to find the things because it's, you know, they're like, I don't know what she. How do I get this right? Do I just google this?
- [32:16]
Dr. Amy
And then they're, you know, it's not.
- [32:18]
Susan Bratton
Going to be Google history exactly. But encouraging him to pump every other day or so to regain his erectile function is super helpful because he's having that vascular retraction and nerve retraction and loss of blood carrying capacity along with diminished nitric oxide production as well. If that's not giving him super nice, firm, hard, veiny erectile function, then take him to Gainswave treatments. That's the next order. The next level higher of more efficacious, stronger treatment for reversal of erectile function. Very good, very safe, very proven. But go to for and the reason I keep saying Gainswave is go to a Gainswave practitioner be because a lot of people are offering shockwave therapy, acoustic wave therapy. They're not trained, they don't understand the device. It's not, you know, go to someone who's been trained. That's very important. And then he can also always use a constriction ring to pump up and hold blood in there for intercourse while he's remediating the situation. There are also some very good penis rings, great for intercourse. One of my favorites is the Adam. It's@drivedesire.com It's a double vibrating penis ring. He puts it on and then you can make love with him and you can be on top of him and get the vibe on your clitoral structure while he gets the vibe on his perineal structure. And that's very pleasurable. If he's got pretty intractable erectile dysfunction and that's why he's kind of hiding out from you, then Ms. Mystery Vibe has two different medical grade penile constriction devices that also vibrate, that are very, very good for guys who just for like maybe they have diabetes or, you know, like they have things that are intractable. So they're very good. And then the other thing is that sometimes guys are workaholics. You know, they're very driven to achieve and they get involved in their own stuff. And you end up making all of the initiation. And women don't like to initiate. We feel like that's a man's job. We want to be swept off our feet and ravished. We're not interested in being the seducer. We want to be seduced. And if he's too caught up in his own stuff and he's kind of abandoned you, you got to get him back. And that could be scheduling lovemaking dates. And a lot of times what happens in long term relationships is that it's kind of like, you know, it's such a heavy lift to get in the sack together that nobody wants to make the effort. And so often what I find is if you end up doing something new where it's like, we're not going to just do the thing that we never do anyway, let's do something new. I have a resource called the Sex Life Bucket List. And it's really fun if your partner is willing to do this with you. It has 48 erotic play dates on it. And you get a PDF and you get a video from me. It's free. I just give it away. It helps people really get a sense of what they might want to learn together with their partner. Because if you don't keep learning things, it really is boring. You know, the, the thing about desire is that it's an equation, a balance between the trust and safety. You, you're, you feel safe with this person, which we have plenty of in our monogamous relationships, most of the time with adventure, variety, novelty, learning new things to create and keep the new relationship energy going. Then you get more desire for each other again. And the sex life bucket list, which is@sexlifebucketlist.com has 48 erotic play dates with a PDF, you can print them out. You each get one. You watch my little video where I walk you through these sexy, fun ideas. There's nothing in there that's weird. You're not going to be like, oh my God, I can't believe that. It's like very nice things you can do together that you can mark a B or C. Your A's are, oh, this is definitely going on my bucket list. Your B's are wouldn't be on my bucket list. But if you want to do it, I would totally do that with you. Cs are, it's not for us right now. And then you merge your A lists and you're like, okay, we want to do a lingerie photo shoot. We want to try to find my G spot. We want to try that Adam penis ring, whatever it might be. And then you've got something to look forward to, to practice, to try that's new together. And I think for many people, once they, you get them out of their head and back into connection, when they're workaholics, they remember how much fun it is to be with you again. So it's not how you look. It is not. I promise you. He still thinks, he probably thinks you're more beautiful than ever, but he's gotten off the road somewhere and you just need to get him back. Yeah. Come back.
- [37:18]
Dr. Amy
Yeah. And just like you said in the very beginning, it might be his health as well.
- [37:21]
Susan Bratton
It is.
- [37:21]
Dr. Amy
I mean, we tend to be so focused. And if she was on her own thyroid journey as well, she was really focused on herself at that time. And sometimes it's very easy to forget the health of our spouse. He might be declining. Just like men decline with age, their testosterone levels decline with age and things just stop working. Well, he might need his own help, but, you know, men are more hesitant to ask for help, especially when it comes to their health. You know, they stand there all, all manly and, and really stubborn and they don't ask for help.
- [37:55]
Susan Bratton
They're in denial. Yeah, they have rose colored goggles. Testosterone really makes them feel like they're more invincible than they are. It makes them think. That's why they mansplain. They always think they're right. They always think they know the answer. It's just testosterone fooling them. Which is why when he looks at you, he doesn't even see your skin. He just sees how beautiful you are. Testosterone makes him that way. That's why I love testosterone. I love the rose colored goggles. I love the confidence. I love thinking I know more than I do.
- [38:22]
Dr. Amy
My God. Make sure your man has testosterone. You will always feel beautiful because he'll have the rose covered knuckles on. I love it. I love it. And this question is from a guy. Which should men with Hashimoto's be looking out for in this category? I'm gonna say when I see Hashimoto's, I always see low testosterone. And with low testosterone for women, I think we can, we can still break through and overcome. We can still have an orgasm, we can still, still have desire because chances are we might have a little bit of testosterone and then we have all those other hormones dominating like estrogen, sending lubrication to our areas and, and progesterone calming us down and making us less bitchy and helping us sleep, which is going to increase desire and libido. But for men, I always see a thyroid problem hit their testosterone. What else comes into play for, for men and women? Well, you kind of already touched on the erectile dysfunction components. But what else for men would you say can affect their, their drive and desire? Or is it really just testosterone and stress?
- [39:25]
Susan Bratton
I think it's workaholism. Testosterone, stress, victimhood, male pattern anger.
- [39:32]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [39:33]
Susan Bratton
Their two emotions they're allowed to have are anger and victimhood. And some guys are really deep in that. And it's a shame. It's our culture that did it to them. Just like I was complaining about the patriarchal sexuality culture. It also hurts them as much as it hurts us. They're supposed to be always ready. They're supposed to know, they are supposed to know what they're doing. They don't know what they're doing. They just think they, I have no idea what they're doing. And you know, all of this stuff, they can be very angry a lot. So when they don't feel well, that makes them extra angry. And they feel like victims when they're not healthy. All that stuff is misery for them. Yeah, they become joyless. And so as Dr. Mom, when we're in partnership with our men who don't feel well and we're trying to get them to heal themselves and do the things that to do to take care of themselves, sometimes they're so stuck in, I gotta get this done. I'm too busy for that right now. It's all bullshit anyway, you know, like that's kind of, that's kind of what they do.
- [40:33]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [40:34]
Susan Bratton
And you have to be like, baby, no, no, no, no, no, no. You've gone off the deep end here. Let's, let's get you back. Let's get daddy back where he was. Remember daddy when I met him? He was fun guy. Remember him? That's who mommy wants back again, you know, and you gotta sometimes kick their butts to get them to do the things they need to do to take care of themselves. That's why we are the doctor Moms.
- [40:56]
Dr. Amy
Yes, that is true. So we can lead them to better health, which equals a better sex life. So. So this one comes back to your clitoral atrophy comment. BHRT helps with external. But how long should it take for the internal clitoral area to respond, I. E. G. A. Spots and the clitoral arms.
- [41:18]
Susan Bratton
Yeah. So again, nitric oxide supplementation is going to really accelerate that. That's, that's very, very important. And then I like rabbit vibrators. The one that I particularly absolutely like right now is the lioness. It's a drive desire as well. And what it does is it has an internal and external vibration, but it also runs on an app that will actually measure your orgasmic response and it will tell you which kind of orgasm you had. There's three categories of orgasm. There's avalanche, wave and oceanic. And it will tell you duration and intensity of your session, your self pleasuring sessions. And so the more that you can self pleasure and remediate all of that, the better off you are at having orgasmic response when you're, when you're having partnered sex. The other device that I also really like for internal vaginal rejuvenation is the vagina device that has red light therapy. Warmth and vibration.
- [42:18]
Dr. Amy
Yep.
- [42:18]
Susan Bratton
It's@vaginadevice.com, it's probably at drive. It's probably on drive desire as well. And photobiomodulation. Red light stimulation intravaginally at home is very, very good for a number of reasons. Number one, it produces more glycogen. So not only does it do mitochondrial stimulation for cellular biogenesis to thicken the vaginal tissue and make it more resilient, it also produces glycogen, which is the sugar that good vaginal bacteria eat. So the combination of the topical estrogen BRT intravaginally along with the red light therapy is like the perfect stack for vaginal health and vaginal microbiome health. The other thing that it does is the warmth recollagenates. That tissue firms up that pelvic musculature with the vibration that is like Kegel toning. And so you're getting kind of your Kegeling, you're getting your, your tissue rehabilitation. And the other thing that it does is the red light brings blood flow into the vaginal canal. So one of the reasons I like that particular vagina device is that on the days that I know that I'm going to make love with my husband, often I'll wake up in the morning and I like to scroll my socials in the morning with my coffee in bed before I get up. And I'll put in my vagina device while I'm doing it. It's an eight minute routine that it runs, it's nice and warm and that warmth brings blood flow. So you're getting intravaginal engorgement, which helps with sensation, pleasure and lubrication. It really helps with lubrication because the vagina is not a gland. It doesn't self lubricate. It's actually requires blood flow to flow to your pelvic bowl. So you need to feel aroused, you need to have good nitric oxide stores. You get the blood flowing into the pelvic bowl and then the liquid from your blood plasma seeps through the vaginal lining to wet it. So when a lot of women are like, I'm dry as a bone, part of the reason is that the tissue has thinned from the loss of estrogen and collagen. Also, collagen is very, very collagen with copper and zinc, very, very good for you. And like I have that in my morning smoothies. The blood has to seep in and that takes time. So women aren't starting out feeling juicy, but they can get there. But when they stop having this good kind of lubrication feeling, it makes them feel like their libido is lower because they're not wet, even though they could be really turned on and dry as a bone. When you, when you have good vaginal lubrication, you just feel sexier. You just do.
- [45:06]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [45:07]
Susan Bratton
So it helps with all of that, which I really like as well.
- [45:10]
Dr. Amy
Now you like actually using lubrication. I want to ask what your favorite lube is and also talk a little bit about almost the embarrassment that women have when they have to use a lube. Like there's nothing wrong with that, but it's almost like they're like, yeah, honey, I'M dry. I need to break out the lube. Sorry.
- [45:29]
Susan Bratton
Yeah, well, and it's interesting because I don't actually like sexual lubricants. They're a category of product that is governed by the fda and so they must include a like a shelf stable type of a. An ingredient.
- [45:46]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [45:47]
Susan Bratton
And a preservative. And the problem is that lubes these days. I've studied the top 30 brands of lubes and every brand, single one, is now akin to an ultra processed food. They it maybe used to be made with jojoba oil or avocado oil or something like that, or aloe vera or something along those lines. But now everything's been replaced with words you can't even pronounce that are just chemicals synthesized in the lab that, you know, glycerin, it dries you out all these things that I wouldn't put them in my vagina. So what I intimacy oils. And I actually have a company that I'm working with now that I am really enjoying their particular formulation. It is CBD based, but it also uses nut oils instead of necessarily just coconut oils or MCT oils. It also, they also use more emollient oils like jojoba sweet almond oil. And they also use essential oils if it's one with fragrance. So it's only things like actual vanilla essential oil, actual lavender essential oil, actual citrus essential oil, which I really like. They're very, very lightly. The essential oil is very light part of it. And CBD is derived from a hemp plant. It's non psychoactive and it triggers your own body's endocannabinoid system. The endocannabinoid system. We have endocannabinoid receptors all over our body with a high density of them in the genital tissue. And when you put CBD on the vaginal tissue, it triggers the body's own pleasure healing pathway. So it's very nice for Yoni. She loves it. And the company that I work with now called Nude, they created. They also have something else I like. This is the reason that I'm with them right now as my favorite is that they have these wonderful intimacy oils, but they also make vitality and stamina gummies and capsules that are 100% of really nice libido botanicals. They include cordyceps, horny goat weed, more puama, tongkat ali. And the gummies are a little bit lighter and there's no psychoactive ingredient in them. They're a little bit lighter and they'd be for like if you just know you're going to make love tonight. You take one in the, you know, a few hours before lovemaking. The capsules are like if you're going away for the weekend and you don't want to do the Viagra route, you want to have a high libido, lots of blood flow, you want extra sensation. You would take one of their capsules. It's, it's a little stronger. They have the vitality ones for women and they have a stamina ones for men. I will get some sent to you if you'd like to have some. They're@lovers bundle.com and they put a little kit together for me and I love those. They're my, they're my new favorite product. I'm always on the lookout for the latest and greatest and best things. And that's the new love of my life is the Lover's Bundle.
- [49:10]
Dr. Amy
Yes. You know, you've introduced me to really high quality lubricants that are non toxic. And I love that. I never even knew that about lubricants. Of course you're putting them inside of your body. You don't want them to have toxic chemicals. So I, I love everything that you said right there. That's absolutely, it's amazing. And we're going to be putting all the links that.
- [49:30]
Susan Bratton
Yeah, sorry, there's so many links.
- [49:33]
Dr. Amy
So many links. But hey, this is where people go to find it. I mean, I love it. I absolutely love it. I already typed in the sex bucket.
- [49:40]
Susan Bratton
List and sex life bucket list.
- [49:42]
Dr. Amy
Yeah, I got to go to that after this recording is over. So. Last question for you, Susan. And this is a really good one to end on. You know, some people might blush a little bit, but I think it's important to talk about that. My partner wants anal sex and I just can't bring myself to enjoy it. Is there any way, can I use butt plugs? How can I actually start to enjoy anal sex? And. And I got to piggyback on that. It's quite often that you do you hear about women actually getting pleasure and having an orgasm from anal sex. And to so many women, that is, that is a foreign concept. Like how in the hell do you actually find pleasure in it? Or they might say, you know, I just kind of grin and bear and use a lot of lube and then it's done.
- [50:28]
Susan Bratton
Yeah. Remember I was talking earlier about the 20 kinds of orgasms the human body can have. Analgasms are one of them. And it's a thing for real.
- [50:37]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [50:37]
Susan Bratton
And it's like any pleasure pathway the first time you try it, it's, you don't know what you're doing, you can't relax. It's all brand new. It's very, you know, it's a very unsure thing because you're not, not really sure about it. It wasn't until my 60s that I really started enjoying anal gasms. And so the thing about sex is that it's all learned. It all takes practice for you to relax and enjoy it. And your butt needs a lot of warm up. It needs a lot of just massaging and then a little bit of fingers and then maybe you put a little plug in there and that's enough for day one. And then the next time you try it, it's a little more easy and a little more relaxing. And by the third or fourth time, maybe he can get the tip in and you can control that. You know, you can be on top of him and you can slide down on him and you can take your time with it and you can ease your way down. And it doesn't have to have a lot of moving or thrusting of any kind. It can just be like getting used to having a poo shaped thing up there.
- [51:41]
Dr. Amy
Right.
- [51:41]
Susan Bratton
It's not going to be any bigger than the poo that you've taken. So it totally fits. Nothing's going to happen. It's not dangerous in any way. And it is incredibly pleasurable once you get used to it. And it's a different kind of orgasm than a, you know, touching the tip of the clitoris or anything internally in vaginal or nipple gasms or kissing gasms or core gasms or any of the kinds of things that your body can learn the pathway too. So I'm glad that your husband has an appetite for trying new things. And I believe that if you have an open mind and you know that it's safe and that it takes time, that you can really get there and that ultimately you'll find that you quite enjoy it. If you don't want to do it, don't do it. It's okay. But I'm encouraging you to actually try it because oh my God, it feels like this. It feels like, oh, it's like really deep and like guttural and you know where your, your vaginal, your clitoral orgasms can sometimes be like, oh, that's not an analgasm. An analgasm is a.
- [52:52]
Dr. Amy
It's happening, it's really happening.
- [52:57]
Susan Bratton
Yeah. So it's very nice. So I would encourage you to keep playing around with it and I would also Recommend a lube called Uber Lube. I don't have a link for that. You can just Google that very easily. U B R L U B E. Uber Lube is a silicone lubricant. And I generally don't recommend silicone for love making because silicone is an inert chemical.
- [53:19]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [53:20]
Susan Bratton
But I wouldn't drink it, so why would I put it in my vagina or even in my rectum? But it's very, very smooth for the rectum. And one of the nice things is as well that you can also use are those foria melts. They're made of cocoa butter and jojoba oil and they have ones that are just. They're just these like little inserts and you can pop one up in your butt and it melts up in there. And then you've got a lot more emollients for anal pleasuring. So between the cocoa butter insert and the Uber Lube, you're gonna have a lot of slip and glide. The other thing is just use a little. Just use a little douche bottle and just squirt water up in there. And then just, you know, kind of push it out, do it again, push it out, do it again, push it out. Don't. It doesn't have to go way high. It's. You're just cleaning out the lower rectal area so that there's no little poopy things in there that are going to make you embarrassed.
- [54:26]
Dr. Amy
Right.
- [54:26]
Susan Bratton
So once you do that and then you use these good kinds of lubricants and then you take your time and you laugh and you get really warmed up beforehand. So kissing, breastplay, maybe making love. And never let him use his hands or his penis that have touched your butt in any other. Don't let it get near your vagina. It never go back and forth. And I also don't recommend any kind of mouth to anal play because there's a lot of parasites, bacterias. And you know, the parasites we are finding out now we're carrying these parasites and they are. A lot of doctors are now thinking about, oh, maybe they're like one of the things that cause cancer. So you don't mess with that stuff.
- [55:06]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [55:06]
Susan Bratton
So I just like to play it safe that way. So anal is safe. Eating your butt is not.
- [55:11]
Dr. Amy
Right. Thank you for that, Claire.
- [55:13]
Susan Bratton
Oh, we ended this on a.
- [55:14]
Dr. Amy
And I was just gonna. I'm like, that's a great way to end the show. Analyst. Safe. Only you and I can do a show like this. I love it. I love it.
- [55:28]
Susan Bratton
It's good to be practical.
- [55:30]
Dr. Amy
I love it. I absolutely love it. And it's, it's, it's very practical because this is information that people need and it's information that people are, I don't know, too scared or something. I too did. They found it taboo. But this is conversation that needs to be had if we want to have a good, happy sex life and like you said, extend our life. Because having a good sex life and having the orgasms actually improve your internal health. It's been documented. We know this. This is not a fad. It's not a game to get you to have more sex. It really does improve our longevity and lifespan.
- [56:02]
Susan Bratton
Yes.
- [56:03]
Dr. Amy
Yeah.
- [56:03]
Susan Bratton
Yeah. Well, here we did it. Good for us. That was fun. As always.
- [56:07]
Dr. Amy
As always, Susan, where can people find you? We're going to put all, all the links that you, you mentioned in the show, put those in the show notes. But what are you working on now? Where can people find you?
- [56:17]
Susan Bratton
Yeah, to betterlover.com I have a newsletter, goes out twice a week full of tips and techniques for passionate lovemaking. And if you have any question about anything, it doesn't have to be with what the particular newsletter of the day is, you can reply to it and they go right into my personal inbox and I almost always have an easy answer. I can solve your, your problem. I'll send you a link or a video or a little book of mine or anything. So if you're on my newsletter, you have access to me that way as well.
- [56:45]
Dr. Amy
So better lover.com and you have so many resources. There's really, there's no excuse for people to have bad sex life. No libido and no orgasm. There's no excuse. You can absolutely get over all of that and have an amazing sex life. So thank you, Susan. I love you so much. Thanks for being on. The information shared on the Thyroid Fixer podcast is intended solely for informational and educational purposes. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always consult with your physician or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition treatment or before making changes to your healthcare regimen, including medications, supplements or other therapies. Use of the information provided in this podcast does not establish a doctor, patient or client provider relationship between you and the host or between you and any other healthcare professionals featured on the show. Any medical opinions or statements made by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or affiliated parties. Statements regarding dietary supplements or health related products mentioned in this podcast have not been evaluated by the fda. These products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Some episodes of the Thyroid Fixer podcast may include sponsorships or affiliate links. The host may receive compensation for discussing or promoting certain products or services. Any such sponsorships or affiliations will be clearly disclosed during the episode. All opinions expressed are those of the host or guests and do not necessarily reflect the views of any sponsors. The inclusion of a product or service does not imply endorsement by any healthcare professional featured on this podcast.