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- [00:00]
Ben
Ben hadn't had a decent night's sleep in a month. So during one of his restless nights, he booked a package trip abroad on Expedia. When he arrived at his beachside hotel, he discovered a miraculous bed slung between two trees and fell into the best sleep of his life. You were made to be rechargeable. We were made to package flights and hotels and hammocks for less. Expedia, made to travel.
- [00:30]
Tim Dillon
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon show. Fair is fair. We must, even though we are cautious about what this guy does a lot to not like some things to like. We want to congratulate the mayor of the. I'm sorry, that the mayoral candidate for the Democratic Party in New York City and his name is Osama bin Laden. I want to congratulate him. I thought it was an ambitious thing to have attacked the financial capital of the world. To have hit out and to come back and to have noticed how much salads cost, sandwiches just lunch in general, how angry people were and to come in and go, listen, I know I did wrong with the Twin Towers, I know it wasn't ideal, but remember what you were paying for rent when I attacked the World Trade Center? How much more equitable it was, how much. Remember in 2001 when 20 bucks bought your pack of smokes, a cocktail, a dime bag of weed and a burrito, and that's your night. When I attacked the World Trade center and he would say, he would say in the speeches, he'd go justifiably, many would clap, yes, we agree. I attacked it justifiably because of the things I didn't agree with. Troops in Saudi Arabia, America's support for Israel. But even as I watched people jump out of those buildings to their sudden and inevitable death, I thought to myself, maybe I'll come back here one day and give them free buses. So when Osama bin Laden came back to the city to give people a more equitable plan to live, I, I, I get, I get it. Hey, I'm not dead. The Navy seals didn't get me and I'm here to make buses free government run grocery stores. Let's get rid of the cops. Let's get people walking around with clipboards asking questions. Of course I am kidding. Osama bin Laden is, is not the nominee. Osama bin Laden was a CIA asset that we pretended lived in Pakistan and then we sent a group of Navy SEALs to kill him. Who are they? Also somehow died in a mission, which seems odd, but they're all dead. Like I think all the members of SEAL Team 6 are dead. Don't look it up, it doesn't matter. But go. I believe that to be the case, truly. And it was very weirdly like we kind of knew Pakistan had him and we didn't listen, let's not get lost in that. My point is that Osama bin Laden, wherever he is, is not the guy. I know that, Charlie Kirk, a few people have made that kind of comparison. There's a lot about 911 we don't know, so I don't think we can. And listen, by the way, I'm no fan of the immigration. I'd like it to cool down. I'm a big fan of a cool down with the immigration. A cooling period, a cooling off period, a settling in. How about that? A settling in. No one talks about immigration like that. Let's let all these immigrants settle in. If you ever stayed at someone's house and they go, let me let you get settled, that's what we want. But so this is not a defense of radical Islam or immigration. Two things I'm no fan of. There's a lot more to 911 than just, hey, you know, couple of guys in a cave didn't like us. Now, I don't know how much more there is to it, but if you have an education level beyond fifth grade, you realize something else is afoot. This seems to be one of the biggest issues with the Republican Party right now, is they are unable to. When they try to dunk on a guy like Zoran Mama Lava, who is the Democratic primary winner, Zoran Mamadama. They don't understand when they just say the word 9 11, it's bad for them because everything after 911 was terrible. And that's why we all look at the Iran engagement and go, let's relax, let's calm it down. War gives people something to do in the government. People think the government does more than it does and it doesn't do all of that that much. And there's a lot of people that don't do that much. But when there's a war, like everyone's working, like we've talked about it on this show, when the Pentagon, like when they're about to go to war, they all start ordering pizzas. It's like they have something called the pizza index where people know when we may or may not go to war or drop a bomb. Because everyone at the Pentagon's like staying late and ordering pizza because they have to work. It gives them purpose. Tonight's the night we got to do It. It's time. Get the. You know what I mean? And they're. And they're going pepperoni. And we'll hit it. And we'll hold on one yet. If they come with it, fine. If the wings come with it, I don't want. Is it a deal? No. They'll pierce underground 30 to 50ft, and we're hoping the rubble will go on top of it. So even if we don't destroy it, they're not gonna be able to get the nuclear. Hold on one second. I apologize. If it's a deal, yes. If we're paying extra, then no. I don't know how many ways to say it. If it. Then get the deal. The deal is two pizzas. Well, then take. Take half of one home. Take half of one home. Hold on. Someone's calling. Oh, it's the vice president. It doesn't. It's not a big deal. Don't answer. Take the. We kid JD Vance, who I believe is still working for the government. Do we know that? I don't know. It seems like he might be. He's kind of working for the government. Get up. The thing. Get up. J.D. vance on Fox News with the Iran deal where. Where Mullen sent this to me. Where he was like. He's like, that's not the draft. He's like, that's not the draft I saw. But he goes. What I like about the President is he's always working. Yeah. I mean, he does a. He does a thing where he's talking about the deal and. And that. The. This draft of this deal thing that happened, and he goes on Fox and he's like. Well, the language was a little different from the draft that I saw. But what I love about the President is he's always working. He's always. That guy does not stop working. You know, and this is. It's just fun. It's like, you know, I imagine he's involved tangentially with some of it. I don't. I don't. You know, who can know over there who's in and who's out? I think they've got Tulsi Gabbard doing tough mudder races. I don't think she's allowed in the building. I can. I don't know. The hills are. Tim Dillon attacks Tulsi Gabbard. I didn't attack her. I like Tulsi Gabbard. I said, if all these dark forces are goading us in a war, can you mention a few of their names? You know, a few of their names might Be Good has just put out.
- [09:50]
Brett
And this administration, Brett, it happens quite a bit, actually. But we knew this was coming. The draft, it was interesting. I just read the draft about two minutes before we went on the air. It was a little bit different from what the president had showed me a couple of hours ago. But again, I knew that he was working the phones as I was on the way over here. So I knew exactly what we were going to do. And look, I love that about this presidency and this administration is. He's always working. He doesn't say, you know, the vice president's gonna do an interview, so I'm gonna stop doing anything. He says, you know, we're gonna do the American people's business.
- [10:22]
Tim Dillon
The vice president, he's like, it's not like the vice president is doing an interview with me. I'm gonna stop doing it or tell him what we're doing. I'm just gonna let see what happens out there and see if he can, you know, run interference, just stall, you know, hold them. As we'd say, the headliner's not here. You go out there and hold him. Keep them. Keep them going. So I think JD Vance is still working there. I'm unsure. I don't know. But the thing that Republicans don't realize when they go after this. Zoran. Mama. Mom. Mom. Donnie, who is a young, you know, like, attractive, energetic person who's got some wacky ideas about like, free grocery stores and free bus rides. I mean, if you were homeless, wouldn't you just go to the hang out on the bus? If it was free, I would. I don't take buses. You know, I don't care what happens to them. But I imagine there are people that do take them and they wouldn't. They don't want just homeless people on the buses and people selling drugs on the buses and fucking people on the buses. But that's what I would do if it was all free and I was homeless. I'd go, well, why wouldn't I just get on a bus? But he's going to have the grocery stores because of the price of food. And he's going to. Instead of police when someone lights someone on fire on the subway, he's going to send like a team of mental health professionals to ask that person to stop and to de escalate the situation. Because in his mind, and in the mind of many people, the de escalation is going to be done, like, with it, with a compassion and like having like an intellectual game plan going into it. When there's Like a guy who's like, screaming and you know you're going to be like, all right, how do we get to him? Like, how do we Jedi mind read where he's at? And it's going to be interesting and exciting to see what happens with that. I do think you need the threat of lethal force in a lot of cases, not all of them, but it does seem like if there's a guy and he's about to light a woman on fire, it's kind of interesting being like, hey, where's this coming from? Like, where's this coming from? Why are you doing this? What is this going to solve, really? Don't you understand that by lighting this innocent woman on fire, you know, you're just. You're putting yourself into a position you don't want to be. And it seems to me that you're in pain and you're hurting. And I understand that a lot of things about society don't make any sense, right? I mean, all these apartments, all these rich guys live in them, but they don't even live there. Like, they barely live there. They use these apartment buildings as vertical money laundering units, and they launder money from all over the world and they don't pay any taxes. And the working class bears the brunt of this because their jobs are shipped overseas and their standard of living drops. I understand where your rage comes from. And then at this point, the guy's like. And they go, I did. That guttural yell is. We understand where it comes from. It's a lack of health care, the respect that women aren't given, how much harder it is for trans people of color. And the guy's like. But then he starts to like a. Then they walk over, they start petting him, he puts the gas can down, and they go, we. We know. And they go, we know how difficult it is to exist in a society like that. So let us take you to this government owned grocery store. Would you like to go to the government owned grocery store? They have a lot of nice. They have little hummus cups and. And the thing about hummus. And there'll be a Jewish girl with big glasses, and she'll go, and the thing about hummus is, if you eat too much, I get gassy. But these little hummus cups are, like, perfectly portioned. And the guy will go. And then he'll be, like, shirtless, he's covered in blood. And then he puts a gas can down. And then they walk him out, and then they bring him to the government grocery store and they start talking to him about. And then they'll find out the whole thing was a gluten allergy. That his. He was not metabolizing gluten. And that's one of the reasons he was going to light that woman on fire on the subway. And if that works at work, I hope it works. By the way, count me in. I'd like it to work. I'm no fan of the cops. I was pulled over going 97 out to Southampton. Fuck you. I'll never do a fundraiser for you scum. Stay with the fire department. Never see me wearing an NYPD hat, even though they don't really bother me. But the Long island trooper, New York state troopers, fuck you. Not for me. It is what it is. They got me going 97. Or 87, whatever, 87. It's not right. They see the Bentley, it's class warfare. Everyone's speeding, everyone's going fast. They pull me over because they're like, fuck this guy. Then they pull me over, they're like, where do you even live? I go, who knows? They go, where's this car registered? I go, I don't. I think Beverly Hills, buddy. Just write the ticket, you slob. So I'm not for the cops. I'm just saying it might be interesting because I. I think, you know, if we look at San Francisco and a few of these other cities, Portland, Seattle, Detroit, Chicago. The Democrats who've run these cities haven't produced great things. But I don't know, maybe it won't go that way where it's like flash mobs of children. I mean, Chicago's just fully got flash mobs of teenagers storming places. If ED is getting you down, you need HIMS to help your confidence. Among other things, HIMSS provides access to treatments that can help you stay hard and last longer. You can be ready whenever the mood strikes. Feeling a little sold out in the bedroom? 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He won over Everybody making over $100,000 a year voted for the guy. And here's one of the reasons. Obviously he is appealing to a demographic of people who are understandably, and understand what I'm saying here. Because you're not wrong, understandably frustrated that their level of education has not turned into income. Understand what I'm saying here? I say the most valuable things in the world, by the way. Actually, in between. Oh, that was a really funny bit. Yeah, we got it. But now I'm going to say something actually brilliant. That's actually the right thing. Always. Okay, Diddy's innocent. No, but they just wrapped Diddy's defense. Zoran Mandami. Mamdani. Mamnamna. Zoran. Zoran. Don't mess with Zoran. Right, Zohan, what was it? Don't start with me, folks. They're angry that he's appealing to a constituency of people who are angry that their income, that their education is not reflected in their income. And these people were told their entire life that all they had to do to make money was to get a college degree. This, this is a generation of people that were told that the route to comfort and security was education. And all of those people then graduated from schools in an alarming amount of debt. They were also told they should follow their passions in life and work in a field that was interesting, exciting, and maybe creative adjacent. So lots of these people move to cities to get jobs in finance, tech, media, whatever. And a lot of companies over the last few years have hemorrhaged jobs. Specifically people in the media sphere. Yeah. And the entertainment world. Okay. But many other industries as well. The constituency that's powering Mamdani's campaign is, by the numbers, a higher educated, higher income group. But they're not high income compared to new. Compared to what you would need to feel rich in New York. I don't feel rich in New York. And I make a hell of a lot more money than these zeros. Now, it doesn't mean that Madani's wrong about wealth inequality in America and specifically in New York. He's correct about that. It's the same issue that Donald Trump built a coalition around. Fairness. Trump's coalition focused obviously more on immigration. A populist nationalist uprising against elites in education, media, wherever Mamdani Has a similar thing. It's a populist uprising, but instead of being directed at the elites in media and entertainment, because they largely, many of them are supporting him. Not the big elites, not the billionaires, not my Meadow Lane boys and girls, shout out to the whole crowd, buy me, daddy. I'm here. Human shields. Say no more. But shell out a little. No shell out. Can't defend everything for free. You give me money, I'll pop right on here. I'll pop right on here. Is it a. Is. But you gotta give me a little. Give me a little. Give me. What about a basket? You send a basket over a couple of Goldberg's bagels, some locks, some scallion cream cheese. Just a little gesture. I'm not asking for a abc. What I'm saying is the big boys and girls, the big institutional money doesn't like the guy, but the rank and file in the media and entertainment kind of like him. So their populous rage is not directed that way. They also don't have a problem with the trans stuff in the schools or whatnot. Their rage is directed at rich people and white people and Jewish people, but not really for the not. And let me be careful how I say this, but not for the principled reason. Yes, it was, as Bannon said, a referendum on Netanyahu and Israel's a failed war in Gaza. Now, obviously, Israel would say it's done very well because they've gotten rid of a lot of Hamas, but failed. Meaning that it's, it's, it's further inflamed sentiment against not only Israel, but Jews living all over the world because of what most people are seeing as going way, way, way overboard. And that's the nicest way to say it, but the, the reason a lot of people in the Mamdani camp are putting Jews. It's the colonizer narrative that applies in their head across the board to any white settler, colonial project. America, uk, France, Israel. In this way that you look at the world, any violence done by any group that is a little more tan is usually justifiable and ignored. Or even the Chinese. There's no real, there's no, there's no real, like, passion for, like, the Uyghurs who are in some camp. And I'm not even saying there should be, per se, Like, I'm just saying if we're going to start litigating history, they ignore before, like, 18th, 19th century colonialism. They ignore a lot of other colonial projects. Anything in the Far east, anything that the Muslims have done wrong. This isn't something that they love talking about, but it's populism nonetheless. This is why, when Mamdani said he wants to shift the tax burden to richer and wider neighborhoods if he cures the election in November, a housing policy document on Mamdani's official website includes a pledge to shift the tax burden from overtaxed homeowners in the outer boroughs to more expensive homes in richer and whiter neighborhoods. It is about grievance, racial grievance. It's what it is. And it's, it's, it's. It's kind of undeniable if that's how you present it. He's not wrong that the cost of living in New York City is insane. He's not wrong that people not having health care, people working overtime. I'm with him on all that, and I'm with a lot of people on, On. On. On the far left, on that. Those issues in the far right. Why you would include whiter in that sentence would is insane to me. Why you keep racializing this debate about inequality. They, they. They suck. They can't avoid it. This is why everybody freaked out about racial humor during the 2020 insanity, was because these people, a lot of the people that supported Zoron, a lot of them have never worked shitty jobs, and they've never, they were never in a situation where they're kidding around with people and they're all making fun of each other because of their race. And, and it's not a big deal. It's actually. People bond over it. These people have only worked in corporate America or they've only been to college. They don't. They're not really thrust into these environments where racial humor is actually not. Not only is it not a negative, a lot of times it's a positive, and it's a way people bond. So if you run aoc, you'll lose because she can't detach populism from racial grievance. The Democrats are having a hard time doing that. And one of the reasons that they're having a hard time doing it is it's just hardwired into them. The identity is hardwired into them. But he won, and he won because it is. The message is a salient point. Things aren't fair. People cannot live. And the Republicans should take a note. Andrew Cuomo is up there looking like a guy who runs a diner in Carl Place, Long island, stammering, trying to defend himself against, I don't know, 13 women who he, like, you know, goosed while they were Online for fucking chicken Frances at the Christmas party. He looks old and out of touch. He's talking about going to Israel. As soon as he takes the oath of office, he's going to take it on a plane on El Al on the way to Israel. It doesn't look good. Read the room, read the room a little bit. People that are broke in New York are concerned about New York, you know, so the coalition there, and it's not black people, they voted largely for Cuomo and here's in my estimation why. There is no group of people in America who, who, who are owed more than black people and have gotten less. There's not one group. We've spent the last few years talking about Latinos who have now passed black people as a voting bloc and an economic block. We now talk only about immigrants coming from other countries. We speak about Jews and Muslims frankly more than American born black people. They know that the conversation has moved on from them. Mamdani is talking about immigrants more than black people. They know that they're not stupid. They're well aware that the Democratic Party's kind of moved on a little bit from black people. They get it, they get it. They're going, yeah, yeah, yeah, we got, we pick up what you're putting down. So I think Cuomo to them has name recognition and they're, you know, they understand that this is going in the direction that doesn't include them. The Democrats are building a coalition that does include black people. They know it, they're well aware of it. It's coastal educated, college educated. I'm not saying smart, I'm saying educated white people and illegal immigrants. That's all. That's their coalition. It's not the worst coalition. There's nothing wrong with that. But it does include black people. It's people in the GLBTQ, IA2 world. It's educated white people and it's immigrants. That's primarily the Democratic coalition. That's all they're talking about ever. They talk about low income people but I mean it's like eh, but it's really the cultural energies behind immigration. And Zoran's like we're gonna trump proof New York cuz he might cut our federal funding. And listen, I'm an opponent of those barbaric ICE raids. I think they're fucked up. But I do think criminals need to be deported. And I also think criminals will have wives and kids. So a guy that's wanted for attempted murder, whenever goes, oh, that woman's pregnant, they went to her house. It's like a pregnant mother. Yes. But her husband was wanted for attempted murder. So there are going to be situations where shockingly, murderers and people that have been violent have also procreated and that, you know. So it's just going to be a situation where it's like, but he's a father. It's like, yeah, okay, you know who's a father? Putin. Putin's a father. It's so important right now to have good credit. It can save you anything. Car loans, mortgage, apartments, gas prices up, rent up, way up, groceries. Don't even get me started. It ca feels like everything costs more except credit. Building with Kickoff At a time when money's tighter than ever, Kickoff gives you an affordable way to build real credit without the stress of expensive credit card debt. No credit check, no interest, just $5 a month and it can really help move your score up fast. I built my credit years ago and I wish I had Kickoff. So many of my friends are using Kickoff. 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That's 80% off the normal price when you go to getkickoff.com Tim today get kickoff, you little dirt bag. Must sign up via getkickoff.com tend to activate offer offer plus a new kickoff customers first month only subject to approval Offer Subject to change Average first year credit score impact of + 84 points Vantage Score 3.0 between January 2023 January 2024 Kickoff Credit Account users who started with a score below 600 who paid on time and with no delinquencies or collections added to their credit profile during that period. Late payments may negatively impact Your credit score, individual results may vary. So I. So by the way, good luck to Zoran. Let's get the sandwich article up because I get it. The rage. I've lived in New York on and off. Not enough to pay taxes here, but on and off for a while. And I've seen it only get more expensive and more boring and more corporate. Um, now I'm not saying I long for the days of dangerous New York, because by the way, I was like nine. Most people who want that New York back never lived in it at all. They're all nostalgic for a time that, you know, that was back when like a Rockette would have a knife in her back in, in Central Park. That was a big story. There was a Rockette with a knife in her back in the park. And it was on the COVID like the Daily News and stuff. And people were like, maybe it's time to start cleaning this up. And then Giuliani came in because it was getting hairy out there. That was that kind of New York. And you'd be walking in the park, jogging, whatever, and there'd just be a Rockette with a butcher knife sticking out of her back and a lot of people. So that was the old New York, you know. And sure it was. You know, if you visited New York and saw that you got, you had a story, it was a better story than hey, do you know how crowded the raising canes in Times Square was? I'll give you that. Here's what I will give you. Visiting New York and saying, I got blown in the bathroom of CBGB by someone. I didn't know if they were a man or a woman. And then I woke up in an apartment that I'd never been in before. I went on the roof, I smoked a cigarette with some chick who talked about Buddhism. Then I went down to take a walk in the park to clear my head and I saw a girl with a butcher knife hanging out of her back who was very, very long legs. Turned out she was a Rockette, one of the Rockettes. Cuz this girl, the butcher knife was a Rockette. And that's a real story that someone would have told and has told who visited New York. Now the stories in New York are like, yeah, there's a race in canes in Times Square and it's too crowded. So we didn't get it. We didn't get it cause there was so much. There were a lot of people in it because we didn't get it. So we then went to see a Broadway show. We got. Yeah, so we got tickets to the Trish Paytas musical revue, but we couldn't. And we wanted to do Raising Cane's mukbang and tag her because she likes chicken fingers, but we couldn't do it. And then our flight at Newark Airport was delayed, like, four hours. And it was crazy. So I just sat there and went on my phone and I scrolled through apps and I just looked at people's faces and I wondered if. If they felt anything. Cause I didn't. And I wondered what would make me feel. And then for a brief moment, I thought I looked at these big, beautiful planes through the glass windows of Newark Airport, and I wondered, what would it feel like if one of them, instead of landing on the Runway, just crashed in here? And everyone started screaming and yelling. And the last thing I saw was the fire. Would I feel the fuel as it burned my skin?
- [37:13]
Ben
Would I.
- [37:14]
Tim Dillon
What would it feel like to die? Would I know I was dying? Would I die and go somewhere else? Would people I know be there, like my friends and my family? What will happen? And what was the meaning of all of this? Why am I dying Because I want? Is it because I didn't go to Raising Canes? Should I have stayed on the line? Is it a weird final destination because I didn't eat the chicken finger? And just as I was having that thought, they said the plane was boarding and the flight was easy, no turbulence. We landed in Phoenix at 11:06. What I'm saying is it's kind of bland now. Somewhat boring. Predictable. Predictable. We've created a world where no one feels. Politics is the only thing that makes them feel. How terrible. What a bad idea. Politics is the only thing that makes people feel anymore. People can't. People there. No one's fucking the way that they should be in a messy, gross, kind of sloppy way. It's all very perfunctory, strange, specific fucking. Because porn. So specific. Where it's like someone's like, I can only come if I'm looking at a plant or something. You know, it's like nothing. Everybody's trying every. The perfect has become the enemy of the good. Oh, my God, Say it again. The perfect has become the enemy of the good. Everyone wants to just fuck. Genderless, weird, strange, Scandinavian furniture. People are afraid of rashes and boils and, you know, weird hair in places. And everybody wants women to look like these E Girl types. And, like, in the 70s, people would just fuck. And they were on an old carpet and just. You know. You know what I mean? Like People would fuck in a cab. There just be an Arab guy silently driving on the west side Highway. But now it's all straight. People go on these weird dates and talk about nothing. So my sister is basically like dating this guy for like three years, but then, like, we're like, where's it going? They go on vacation all the time. It's like, you think he proposed? There's like 90 places. Like, me and my girlfriends are always like, oh, my God, is this a place? Cause they go everywhere and there's like 90 places. He could have pulled out a ring, but he, like, never has. And we're like, maybe he's not even planning to. And she's like, I'm letting him go at his own pace. And I'm like, well, actually, that's like, nice of you to say, but, like, how do you even know he's gonna do that? And then we. And this is. People just. It's all nothing out there. So that's why people get excited about politics, because they say, here's our chance to make other people feel pain. That's what drives politics. Not helping other people. Not in this country, by the way. Not in this country. It should, and it does in certain, certain ways. But the reality is you want other people to feel pain. Both the left and the right want other people to feel pain. That's what the. That is the political impulse. Fuck em, get em, get em. That's what it is. And people are doing that because they can't feel any. Everything in life that was supposed to make them feel things. Sex, family, success, money. It's all been ruined to a degree. It's all been sanitized and made kind of unappealing to people. Like, it certainly doesn't equal the fun, raw, direct hit of rage and anger. That's more fun than, like building something slowly over time that might be valuable in your life. It's never gonna be as fun as, fuck him, kill him, kill him. Fuck him, kill him, kill him. You like that mom? The Muslim one? You like that mom? You like his mom? It's the rage. It's just the same way. When Trump won, all those people called their kids, he's back in town, the sheriff's back in town. It's the rage that keeps people going because we've made the world corporate, serene. I mean, not serene if you're obviously getting bombed. But like, for a lot of these types, these college educated people that live in little boxes all over these cities, that scroll dating apps and just sit in the blue light of their MacBook while they drift off to sleep on 19 medications. These people's lives are quite dull. And the only thing that is making them happy is rage. And that's okay. I don't. I'm not. I'm not saying this is good or bad. It seems like a horrible way to live long term. And it seems like we'll just degenerate into kind of meaningless, sporadic bouts of violence that will be celebrated by different groups. We will glorify violence. The man. You don't think nobody feels bad for the health care CEO, nor. Nor really should they in the sense that he represents an evil to people. My mother died in a public institution. I get it. They wouldn't pay for her shit. I would go in and have to sue them to give her the accurate amount of medication because they wouldn't. They wanted to save money and let her go crazier because it's a profit driven system and it's evil. And he was a representative of that. Was he a human being? Yes. Is it a healthy society that celebrates a human being shot dead in the street? And I mean, this is disgusting. And I usually don't even talk like this. And I don't ever go at comedians. Literally. I never go comedians on the show because I respect comedy. I don't know who it was. A comedian dressed up as the ghost of that health care CEO a few weeks after he died and went on a roast and did jokes. That guy has a family. Do you understand that it is immoral to behave like this for not even a lot of money? Almost no money, actually, because I know a little bit about that. Almost no money. But it's sick. It's actually sick. Whoever did that. It was a successful comedian, a good looking comedian, at least facially. And it was wrong what that person did because they didn't have to do it. That comedian actually didn't have to do something like that. He's actually incredibly r. Successful, smart, one of the smartest people in the world. People say, actually why would that person do that? Because there's the moral codes gone. The compass is over. So there's a sick person on torching 2024, the roast of Netflix, who dressed up as Brian Thompson, the CEO. It's wrong, whoever did that. I don't know. I just think that I'm interested to see what happens with this guy. I'm not interested. Like, I don't left. Right? Like all this shit's bored. It's boring. We all know what it is. Everybody gets in America first and Then they're in there. Hava Nakila. It's whatever, it's fine, it's fine. What are you gonna do? Is what it is. Everybody's has lungs, everybody's happy. Do I think it's a good idea to go, you know, to start to build the schools in Iran? No, but that's good. We just did a bomb. Did it get rid of the thing? Who gives a fuck? Probably kind of. What do you care about? Enough. Take the win. But it, it, it, it's just about, you know what it is? It's just about. To me, what, what, what says more about the, the political stuff is what's behind it. So you have these people that are all like, they went to school, they were told they were very special people and talented and they got into the right schools and got the right degrees and now they're like paying $29 for a sandwich in New York City and they're pissed. They gotta take shit from some boss. And New York makes you envious? Like no place. And by the way, I'm not talking about the people who genuinely need help in the city, okay? The black people that the Democratic Party don't give a shit about, whose lives a lot of them are fully responsible for the degradation of African American communities and do deserve a lot more than the government does. I'm not talking about those people. And I'm not talking about the people that suffer under a health care system. I'm talking about now. People that are envious as I am. I'm an envious. We all envy. And the people that don't admit it are liars. I envy people. I do my podcast in a building with a lot of finance people and I understand. And they make more money than me. Why would that be the case? Because we live in a sick society. But that envy New York City breeds it. Because the richest people in the world live here. The richest, wealthiest people, and I don't mean only in America, all over the world, live here. People talk shit to you here and down to you in accents from all over the globe. You, you get insulted here in different languages because it's a global city. I think that restoring the balance will be good if he can make this city more affordable. It can be good if he turns it into a crime ridden hellscape. Not great. Not great if he's blaming whitey and the Jews for everything. Not great. I don't love that. I don't love making it a sanctuary for third world illegal labor that billionaires can use instead of native Born people. And I don't want to talk about Jews and Muslims for the rest of my life. There are Christians who live in America. That should hold some political office, too. Sorry, no offense. No offense. I know that all the signers of the Declaration of Independence were Jewish and Muslim. Right? I mean, Google that. Maybe they weren't. But the point is this. I think the conversation is too dominant. Oh, I love Jewish people. I have great Jew and Muslim friends. I love the whole desert. All of the desert people. The desert tribes, actually, all of the desert tribes. I like. I like their food. I bought a shawarma, a lamb shawarma for my friend before we came here. That's why I'm late. I love all the desert tribal peoples. Yes, they're fighting religious wars all the time. Is it tiring? For me it is. But I do think, how about. How about just a few Christian people who've lived in America for a few generations, just throwing it out there as a bit. As a full bit. But again, might be interesting. That's all. Because it's too much. I even think the Jews and the muzzies are sick of being discussed as much as we talk about. We're just taught it's too much already. It's too much. America shouldn't just be a place where people. Where these groups of people just warring all the time and fighting all the time. It's like we have to return to a little bit of concern for the United States as a country, as a nation, as something that should be functional. Society has to return to being functional. Okay? It can't be an algorithm driven cash grab for insane grifters who have Palantir tattooed on their ass. We need some type of functionality. Everyone who visits my homes, whether it's in Aspen or the Hamptons or Palm Beach, Manhattan, Beverly Hills, Paris, London, St. Kitts, the Maldives, Saint Barth, Saint Croix, Saint Lucia, Little Saint James, Tuscany, Boston, Chicago, Miami, Scottsdale, Arizona, Summerlin, Nevada, Tahoe. On the Nevada side, Incline Village, Jackson Hole, Zurich, the Swiss Alps, any of the places I have residences. They all love Helix. The beds. Somebody will say to me on my Montana ranch, what about these beds? What kind of beds? I say it's Helix. The Helix Midnight Deluxe is my favorite. But there's lots of great ones. You take a short quiz, they tell you, what kind of sleeper are you? It's really wild what you can learn from that quiz. I took that quiz. He said, I died three years ago, but they will tell you what kind of sleep they said, I'm just living in this space between life and death, waiting to be admitted to either eternal glory or the netherworld. I'm like, hold on, I just said I sleep on my left. But my point is, you take the test and then they tell you what you need. Go to helixsleep.com timd 4th of July sale June 13, 2025 and then to be determined. So just take advantage of this immediately. 25. 27% off site wide. This is exclusive for the listeners of the Tim Dillon Podcast. I will tell you this. I've advertised a lot of products on this show. There's not one product that people have actually used more than Helix with me and have literally came to me and said, this is the best bet ever. So, listeners of the Tim Dillon podcast, 27% off site wide. We do thank Helix for this. You helixsleep.com TimDay you don't need to be ripped.
- [51:48]
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- [52:05]
Tim Dillon
How $29 sandwiches push new York to socialism. Soaring costs of living and unaffordable rent have fueled the rise of. Okay, yeah, we don't even need to read it. I get it. 29 for ham and cheese. That's fucked up. That's fucked up. Best sandwich in New York. You go to my hero in. I think it's Bellmore or Merrick. Doesn't matter. It's one of them. North Belmore, Merrick, whatever. Get the Chicken club, Add American Cheese Kalsheet, which is an app I actually use now. It's actually kind of fun. You can come up with your own betting, like, who will be the NYC mayoral race winner? Because, by the way, there's a lot of big money to hate the zuron guy. So there's a lot of guys like Bill Ackman, a lot of these guys who put Trump in. A lot of big, wealthy NYC donors are like, let's dump Zoron and replace him with someone else. Now, that doesn't mean they could prevent him from running. But by the way, how impressive and fun would it be if he just showed up into, like, if he won and came out with a yarmulke and went, just kidding. Ah, it would be sick if Zoran came out with one of those big furry hats to shrimal. And it's just all these hasidic guys, they all started dancing and Zoran's like, gotcha, bitch. It would just be insane. That's what I'm talking about. Fun. You know what I mean? Like, that's what it's lacking. Fun, like twists and turns, like a good show. Get Jewish music up. Just find some non copyrighted Jewish music. Good luck with that by the way. But find some non. Find some non copyrighted Jewish for this. Mom. Tommy bed. Okay? Royalty free Jewish music, by the way. I feel like we're somehow still going to get sued. But Mumdami and his wife come out, they just wave Israeli flags. They're like, just kidding, motherfuckers. You believe the whole Muslim thing? What are you nuts? They're like. He goes, I only said I wouldn't visit Israel because I. I'm there right now. And they're all just dancing in Tel Aviv. And he's like, it's Mamdomiowitz, bitches. And then you'd have to hand it to me, say you're good, you got me, you got me. But on Cal right now, they do have a NYC mayoral race winner. Who will it be? Eric Adams. Who I like, cuz he's just doing blow in clubs. Which is what a mayor of New York should be doing. Should just be staying out of the fray. Staying out of the fray. I want a guy just doing cocaine and nightclubs. I don't need you talking about the Middle East. Eric Adams is concerned with the price of drugs in America that he's taking. So the Kalshee K a l Shi markets here, Eric Adams is at 20%, Cuomo's at 7, and the official Democratic nominee is Zoran, at 72. Heavily favors Zoran. And I like to play around with this website every now and then. You can make a little money, a little scratch. Can make a little money, a little scratch here. I don't always fuck around with that. But it is fun, I'll tell you that much. It is so catchy. And it's similar to the Muslim music. The Muslim music's a little more like. They're just desert peoples. All of them is interesting. We're not, we're different people. America's like a different thing. You know what I mean? America's kind of like, it's a different thing, but they're very like. So it's like figuring out a way for all that to work is like so hard. It's hard. It's hard. God, get up. This rapist. I'm defending this man. How dare people look at this Man. Norwegian Prince Marius Borg Hoiby, 28, charged with three rapes amid slew of allegations against disgraced royal. Look at this man. Does that guy seem like he'd raped three people? A Norwegian prince has been charged with three rapes among a slew of sex and violence allegations involving a double digit number of alleged victims. He looks so nice. Look at him. Get him up. Look at that guy. Does that man seem like he would just walk around sexually assaulting everyone? I mean, he does have. He's. He's like the most evil guy I've ever seen. Yeah, he's a bad guy. He's a bad dude. Marius Borg Hoiby what country is this? I just said it. What is this? Norway? Yeah, Norway. He's. He's a bad man. Cory Montes mom and dad died 12 years after Glee stars tragic death. You know that Glee thing? You ever want to be depressed, watch that documentary. They all get selected for the show and then all of them. One of them is a pedophile. Everyone else kills himself. Someone dies in a lake. It's final destination. Glee. It's time. Tough. It's sad. He's also accused of raping. I can't keep saying that word. They're going to get so mad at us on this YouTube. Unconscious TV star Lenny Meister, 39, at one of his Wild Skym Festival parties allegedly held in the basement of the royal estate. So he had these parties at the basement of the royal estate and he released a statement saying he suffers from several mental disorders and has struggled with substance abuse for a long time. It read, last weekend something happened that should never have happened. I committed bodily harm and destroyed objects in an apartment in the intoxication of alcohol and cocaine after an argument. I've struggled with substance abuse for a long time, something I've been in treatment for in the past. The drug use in my diagnosis is do not excuse what happened in the apartment at Frogner on the night of Sunday last week. And I want to be responsible for what I've done and will explain myself truthfully. Truthfully to the police. Here's the way it all works over there. And I'm going to just tell everybody so that there's no confusion. They all have these castles and during the day they'll do like, hey, come on over. We're doing a thing. So people go over and they got a little Swedish meatball or red cabbage. Red cabbage is good. And you don't get it enough. As a side. Why can't I have it? Stop with the Beets, Red cabbage is good. So they're doing stuff like that, right? They go, hey, come on out. We're doing a castle. We got red cabbage, a little noodle dish, maybe some schnitz, little schnitzel. You go over there, you have a beer. You have a beer. A beer. And you eat and it's nice. And then they send you home and you go, hi, Ben, Spieben, whatever. Like some type of, you know. And I'm talking about all of them over there. Belgium, the whole gang. Germany, Norway, Scandinavia, all these. With the European royalties. Scandinavia, all this stuff, right? And then I'm telling you, I'm out. This is the way it is. Then, like, an old woman comes out. They, like, wheel her out, and she's, like, sitting on the. Like on the. The steps of the palace, and she's like, it is time. And then they release, like, all some of the workers or. And the children are forced to strip naked and run through the woods. And then the elite people hunt them. And when they find them, they have sex with them and kill them. And the old woman and some of the older people watch because they can no longer run after the people. So sometimes somebody will be brought to them to have sex with her and say, okay, you can eat this one. We got. We caught it for you. But they're watching this whole thing and they remember, like, when we were young, we would run after the children and the, you know, the help. The helpers, and. And then we would rape and kill them, and then they light them on fire and everything, and they do druid pagan rituals. So he grew up in that. Not to excuse his behavior, but, like, he grew up in that system where they're like, it's. It's the debt, it's the time. But here's the thing that those people had. They had a little discipline. That little discipline. He's just raping any old person he sees. That's not the game. The game is there's an organized human hunt where we let people run through the forest and then chase after them and kill them and eat them and rape them. And by the way, if you think I'm lying, Google this. It's true. And it probably still goes on. Why wouldn't it? And actually, as much as I might disagree with it, I see actually a huge benefit to. To tradition, especially specifically European tradition. Not to be racist, but you have people not to be like. Like a crazy person, but they have human hunts on the grounds of these castles, and it's well organized and, you know, Some people disappear from the town. It happens once a year, a couple of times a year. It's festival. It's like an autumnal one. And it's. So this kid's raised in that and then he starts doing all this stuff. His parents go, you can't act like this. And he goes, well, what about the human hunt? When I was 4, you know, you guys were having sex with people in front of me, killing them, cannibalizing them. It's like, that's a holiday. That's what has to be explained to these kids. It's a holiday. You know, we would as kids go, why can't we have Easter candy? That's a holiday. Oh, but you don't get it every day. Halloween, you don't get it every day. It's a holiday. So when European royalty hunts humans on the grounds of their castle, rapes, tortures, burns them and eats them, you don't. They have to make it understood to their kids. Like, buddy, we fought wars to do this, okay? We're actually sacrificing people to pagan gods. We have a relationship with the demonic and that we're upholding some sort of pact or agreement with. And we fought years and years and years to be able to, a few days out of the year, relax and do a human hunt. But these are special moments for us. There's actually a lot of pageantry and ceremony involved. You're just out there willy nilly raping people in the dorm room. That ain't the way it works, buddy. So he said, whoa, what about the human hunt? And they're like, it's the, that's a holiday. His father says, the king, that's a holiday. And that's between us. The human hunt, or they call it the hunt. The hunt is actually something very special. You know how sad your grandmother's gonna be when she reads these allegations. But grandma watches us all rape and eat the children. Yes, of course. On a holiday. The fact that you're behaving like this and bringing shame to our family because all of these royal family in Europe, it's just what goes on. It's not even a big deal. And the people know it. Do people know it? Some people go, yeah, it's hunt weekend. Don't be stupid. They know it. The people. It's. It's boring. Oh yeah, you're going to hunt a couple of people. Chop mop. We get it. These royals now, they don't even have any power in these countries. The EU's taken over. They flood them all with Immigrants. Everyone loses their minds. And the royals have nothing except the hunt. And it's the only time they feel powerful. So was that a good idea? To move on from monarchy? To have all these supernational institutions like the eu? So we've moved away from these blood thirsty, pagan royal bloodlines and replaced them with bureaucrats in Brussels. And these people sit in their castles, they're bored as shit. They don't want to go to the opening of a new hospital. They want the hunt. But their children need to understand that the hunt is a special occasion. It's not all the time. So this prince, what's his name again? Hoibi. What's his name? Hoibi. Go up, get his name. Was it Bjorn? Marius? Marius Borg? Hoybe. Marius, please behave and wait till the hunt. It's actually nicer if you wait till the hunt. My father told me once, I said to him, we're on the way to a swim meet. And I said, dad, can I get McDonald's? And he said, son, a hungry dog runs the furthest, runs the farthest. A hungry dog runs the farthest. So, Marius, a hungry dog runs the farthest. Wait till the hunt, have your fun on the hunt, and then get nuts. Rip people's intestines out with your teeth. I mean, really, go on a bender. But don't ruin it with these little snacks. Don't ruin the meal with a snack. Don't ruin the meal with a snack.
- [67:25]
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- [67:43]
Tim Dillon
To our most to our maybe new mayor, Isis bin Laden, Mullah Omar. I wish him well. I wish him the best of luck. I. I love New York City, yes, but I also hate a lot of people who live here. But I also love people who live here. But it's a great narrative either way. Whether it succeeds or is completely destroyed, it's actually a good narrative for me either way. I don't care if it succeeds, I will enjoy it. If it fails miserably, I will move and just talk about it. Really, with me, it's six of one, half a dozen of the other, isn't it? So, in closing, we've learned a lot today. I think we've balanced ourselves in a healthy way. We can't expect old dogs to learn new Tricks. But sometimes, like Andrew Cuomo, we gotta take him to the shelter, put him down, put a needle in that old puppy and watch them fade away. That's right. We've learned that people that have made, you know, bad choices with how much money they've taken out in student loans and are living in cities like New York are unhappy because they were told that they deserved more in life. I am here to tell them you do not. You actually do not. And I've always been here to tell them that you do not. You are normies. You are nothing. That is what you are. Find me a Brooklyn hipster or whoever the people are, I'll find you the most normal, suburban, basic bitch in the world. That's all you are. You could dress it up any which way you like. That being said, I wish Zoran well because I love the city and I want to see it thrive. I want to succeed. I wish Donald Trump well. I'd like to not get involved with Iran. It doesn't seem like we are. At the end of the day, you have to find things in your life that make you happy outside of political rage. I know that it powers most of us just being angry all the time at things, but there's a lot of other emotions instead of being angry. Like, jealousy can do that. Coveting, being envious. But the class war is coming. Fundamentally, it is the. The lesson here is that the future of American politics is going to be written by two opposing versions of populism. One that concentrates its ire and rage on a set of financial elites and people in the government they feel have sold out to them. And then the other type of populism will be doing that as well. But they will also include cultural elites who they feel have worked in concert with the financial elites to destroy the cultural foundations of society, further impoverishing people, making them helpless, and driving them into desperation and pathological behavior. I will be on the hunt in Belgium in that famous castle that I read about, and they will go, it is time for the hunt. And the old woman will come out. I will be the only one who. The. The. The. The people that were hunting run faster than me. So it's gonna be embarrassing that I, like, I keep. And even the old woman's like, he keeps falling down. Will someone kill a peasant and bring them to him? I'm like, no, let me try. Let me try the hunt. But American politics now, the peasants of the village actually have turned, and they are hunting the elites of the castle. And so the elites of the castle have split into two factions, and they're standing on two balconies, trying to convince the peasants that the hunt was actually the other party's idea. What happens now? We don't know. Good luck. Happy hunting.
- [72:46]
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