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Tim Dillon
Not all meals are created equal. For instance, breakfast has the spicy egg McMuffin for a limited time and lunch doesn't. McDonald's breakfast comes first. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon show. Earlier this week, 30 year old teenagers and elk boys received a massive amount of backlash for their interview with Benjamin Netanyahu. And although Netanyahu is widely reviled, he does maintain some support with people across the world and even a few people in Gaza. So here to comment is Nassab from Gaza, who is a big supporter of Netanyahu. Yes, thank you for having me. Thank you for coming on Nassab. So now tell us your story. What's happening in Gaza and why do you support Benjamin Netanyahu? Yes, Tim. So you know, like many people in Gaza, I have every reason to hate Israel. Shortly after October 7th, my family was sheltering under a donkey and Hamas decided to dig a tunnel under the donkey and use the donkey as a human shield, taking out not only my family, but my head and arms and torso. And I put that blame on these barbarians that make up Hamas because Israel is very good and merciful. And right before they bomb our donkey, they send out a text and they say, we are going to bomb your donkey in 20 seconds. But unfortunately I forgot to charge my phone. Well, I mean, that's Nassab. I'm sorry to hear that. But what about now? There are reports from over 100 human rights organizations that Israel is orchestrating a famine in the Gaza Strip. That is simply also not true. Israel send all kind of wonderful. Is there Israeli cuisine to Gaza? Pita bread, hummus, falafel and baba ganoush. And Hamas is stealing the food. Do you know what is true about Hamas? All of their wives and girlfriends are obese. They are chubby chasers. They are. Hold on now, I have a little trouble. This is. I have a little trouble believing that. What about the baby food? Are they stealing the baby food? Yes, Tim, this is what is sick about these monsters in Hamas. They pretend that they are babies. So under the tunnels they steal the baby food and the baby formula and they dress up like babies and they drink formula from bottles and they wear diaper and they make their plus size women change their diaper. These are very sick people. And when the hostages ask for food, they say, we do not know. What are you talking about? We are just little babies. You would have to ask my parents. Well, I had Nassab, I had no idea that this was happening. That, that, that, that Hamas were pretending to be babies and stealing the Food. It's actually amazing. Are there a lot of Palestinians who agree with you? Well, Tim, you also probably do not know this, but Palestinian is not real people. Did you know Yasser Arafat? He was from Egypt. That's why, when you think about it, it's okay to kill us and even put us in an oven. And you might not know this, but many Arabs, they actually enjoy being killed. The Quran says they will go to heaven, so that is why they love being shot and drowned and burned and crushed by rabble. I just don't. I can't. No, I can't co sign that. I can't really agree with that. That sounds really, really insane. That sounds like Israeli propaganda. It seems crazy. And what about the anti Semitism in. On the college campuses and in New York City? You are about to elect a terrorist for your mayor. Yes, but it just feels. It's so surprising to me you feel this way because you are a leg. You're just a leg. I mean, they've taken everything from you. I mean, you're just a leg. But you're still supportive of this. I guess I just really like the techno music and everything that come out of that beautiful country. All right, Noab, everyone that's from. From Gaza, he said supports Netanyahu. I want to talk about a few things. Netanyahu on the Nelk podcast. Brave of him. Brave to sit down like that. Truly brave. And to express opinions like that. Take a look here. Netanyahu on the Nelk podcast. By the way, saying something I said on. Are you garbage? Months ago? But whatever. Netanyahu, what's your go to at McDonald's? No, I'll tell you. Burger King. We did the, you know, the double, you know, Whopper. Yeah, I haven't ripped Burger King in a while. Burger King kind of sucks. Yeah. No, the BK Lounge can hit. I disagree completely. You like burger king over McDonald's. That's your worst take. Absolutely. That's a crazy take. No, that was fine. I mean, I like Burger King. The answer is yes. Here's the thing about it's tough. Obviously, I am a human and want to live, but our civilization does really deserve to be destroyed. Like, that is the hard. That is the really tough thing about it all is that if there was ever a civilization that deserved a cataclysmic. And again, not rooting for it. Don't want it to happen. Don't want it to happen. But just statistically, I mean, could there be a better example? I mean, we just do. I mean, this guy is Committing a genocide, truly. I mean, I don't think anyone's even. I don't think anyone's even denying that at this point. People like quibbling about certain components of it. Like, I. I know that, like, people are like, well, yes, they're starving Gaza, but did you see that video of that guy from Hamas stealing a banana? Did you see that? There's a guy from Hamas eating a banana, and people are like, well, he stole the banana from the people. And they're like, hamas is stealing the food in this whole thing. Israel has no culpability, by the way, at all. They've actually done nothing wrong. It's all been Hamas. Hamas has done everything. There's. There's not been what, they stole the food. They're shooting the people who are in line for the food. Israel's doing nothing. And you have to trust Israel, because otherwise the only people that are reporting out of Gaza, they're not letting journalists in or they just say are Hamas. So if you. If you report anything contrary to what Israel says, you are Hamas or you become Hamas. So, I mean, I just, you know, I mean, the starvation, the photos of the starving. Number one, we're the fattest country in the world. For the fattest country in the world to fund the starvation of a group of people is insane. Look at this. Here we go. This is the thing they keep showing is that Hamas has bananas. All right, yeah, yeah, yeah, they got bananas. This is the. When I ask why we're funding, why we're starving people, we're funding a famine, people say to me, well, maybe take a look at that video of the guy in Hamas with the grapes. A guy. And you go, we're the fattest country in the world. Okay? Nobody is fatter than us. We are now funding the starvation of a group of people halfway across the world or all the way across the world. I'm bad with geography, but far away. And if you bring it up or if you chat about it or if you talk about it, you're immediately called anti Semitic or whatever. And it's completely absurd and insane, and this is nuts. Get up, Randy Fine. Get a photo of Randy Fine. Now, this is the guy who literally said, starve away. He said something like, release the hostages, which, again, the children of Gaza did not abduct the hostages and cannot release them. Randy Fine. Genius. Randy Fine. No, get a fat picture. My producer don't get a picture when he was thin. You're gonna do treat Randy Fine like that? Go get a photo of me when I was 8. Then by the way, get Randy Fine. Look how fat Randy Fine is. Randy Fine literally said, starve away. This guy is out there telling the Gazans to starve while looking like he's like full of fucking marshmallow fluff. It's the, it's the cruelest thing to just have a fatty boom baddie telling the be. Get that quote up where he says, starve away. There's a quote where Randy Fine, who is a congressman from Florida who has a lot of the rhetoric of like the, the smart rich and Ben GVIR and these crazy far right Likud psychopaths in the Israeli government calling these kids in Gaza amalek and the children of the devil or whatever, right? Randy Fine has basically, I believe, said if you look up, starve away. That's what he wrote. Those were the quotes. He said, tell your fellow Muslim terrorists to release the hostages and surrender. Until then, hashtag, starve away. Randy Fine. I mean, there he is. It's, it's, it's crazy that we are providing the material support to Israel to continually engage in this kind of barbarism. We have to cut all funding. We should, we should absolutely cut all funding to Israel immediately. Cut off funding 100%. I don't know why that's even controversial at this point. This is going to be, this is like the worst humanitarian crisis we have. We see it witnessing, unfolding. It's crazy. For the fattest country in the world to be involved in, in, in this starvation of people is insane. It's nuts. And there are people defending this with getting doordash. They're, they're getting full meals. They will develop. They will deliver a seafood tower to you on Doordash. Broken up in ice. Don't. I'm not going to tell you how I know. But in, in ice, they will deliver shellfish on ice to you. Doordash will deliver that. And you get it at your front door. You get a lobster at your front door and eat it and then defend how children in Gaza are. And I mean, you can see these photos. I don't want to show them on the show, but they're so disturbing and it's like, it's crazy. Even some of the way the magazines are reporting it. Like one of them was like, well, they're not dead. They're like half alive, half dead and they're wandering around like ghosts. Like, I was like, what is this? I mean, it's incredibly, it's incredibly disturbing to watch. What will the next phase be? I mean, I don't understand, like, what will Israel do next to them? Like, will it start to melt them? Like, will it use some type of, like, device to start melting the people of Gaza? And then will people start defending that? Well, these are at least hostages until then. Hashtag melt away and you go, wait a minute, hold on. But you're melting people. Yeah, well, so what? October 7th? Yeah, yeah, but they're children. They're, they're women. They're, they're, they're not, they didn't do that. Melt away. So what? They're going to melt. I mean, what, what Stephen King horror movie penalty will be enough at this point? We have now crossed the line. Like I said Final Destination a couple of weeks ago. We're like, even, we're past that. Those deaths were quick. We're like, fully into, like, some crazy long thing. It's, it's completely barbaric. And we should just, we should just stop the money, take all that money that we're funding Israel with and give it to Candace Owens so she can fight her lawsuit against Brigitte Macron and Emmanuel Macron. And here's what I'm saying. Show the pus, show the pussy, show the clit. And I'm not trying to be a problem, and you know, I never am. Show the push, show the clit. I'm not saying she was born a man. I don't know. There's a very easy way to, to put this to bed number one. Have Brigitte McCrone go on the Nelk podcast and have her show the clit to. What are their names? Kyle and Steiny. Have her, show the clit, take the pussy out on the Nelk podcast. Brigitte Macron. Put your bush in Kyle from Nelk's face and let's get justice. How about justice? Even people starving in Gaza want to know this. Even the starving children in Gaza want to see where is the clit. Let's play a little bit of Candace. You're responding to this lawsuit from Brigitte and Emmanuel McCrone. You were born a man and you will die a man. That's the point I'm making. So give us a. By the way, I wish my father said that to me at like, any point in my life. I wish I had that kind of support in my own household. You were born a man. You're a goddamn man. What? We have Candace Owens here. She's being sued by. Brigitte Macron is the first lady of France. And Candace has said Brigitte is, was born a gentleman. And now I have challenged Brigitte to go on the Nelk boys podcast and show her clit and let's do this thing and the war in Gaza. Show your bush. Show your clit to the Nelk boys. You're the. You're the first lady of France. If you're afraid to show your to Steiny from Nelk, then you don't get to be the first lady of France. You don't get to be it. Show your pussy to Joe Rogan in his studio. Fly to Austin and open your. Spread your legs for Joe Rogan. Hey, Mom. That's weird. Mom. Well, it could. It could definitely be worked on, Mom. It could. It's. It. Well, it's a pussy moment. It could definitely be. Oh, 100%. It could absolutely have been altered. Yeah, well, for sure. I saw her pussy mountain. Show your pussy to Joe Rogan in Austin, Texas, and go see a show at the Mothership. Show the clan. Just do it. End the speculation. Show the gash. This is politics. It's the news. And this is what has to happen. We got to move on as a society from this war in Gaza and from this. Stop starving the children in Gaza. Show your clit to Joe Rogan. Go on, kill Tony. I'm the president of France's wife and they say, I got a cock, but I got a clit. Boom. Red band does a sound effect. Make the podcast rounds and show everyone your pussy. Please. Put your pussy in Akash and Andrew Schultz's face. Schultz is like, damn. Get your pussy on flagrant endless. Show your pussy to Theo Vaughn. Let the Avon see your French pussy and let him. Let him decide if it was at one point a small cock. That's what we have to figure out. Was her penis inverted and made into a. This is politics. What. What are tariffs? We don't even know. Get. Put your puss on the Internet. Let's watch. Keep watching this. Sorry. So give us a sample. I'll send my doctors to take your blood pussy. Figure it out real quick, however you want to go about this. Hey, how about just giving us some pictures again of you growing up, you know, raising your children. That would be fine for whatever reason to phone, by the way. Like I said, we'll get to the bottom of it, right? That is what discovery is for and ask a lot of questions. You're probably hoping, oh, you know which this will go away and at least we'll see now. So here's what Candace's thing is that Brigitte was born. Something else she got. I think she stole the identity of her dead brother or something like that. And. And MK Ultra that program that the CIA used, which was a mind control program. Because I listened to this a while ago and it's, it is interesting. And I, at the Beverly Hills Hotel, there's a French guy and I spoke to him about this and he did say to me, macron, there is something that's not French. What is French? Oui, oui. Macron is what is French. In Macron, he like the boys at the hotel. And then I, then I said, I spoke about you on my show because I know you made me a famous, you made the Mia famous. Unusual. But what he was saying was that it was kind of known in France a little bit that something was up with this maybe, maybe not. And then I've had people call me go Conspiracy. This is nuts. Who knows? It's not, it's not going to make any sense until you show Joe Rogan your pussy. That's the way we decide things in them. In, in. In these, in these parts I drink cold brew year round and used to rely on grocery store concentrate or $6 Cafe. Runs mostly out of what I thought was convenience. But then I found trade. Now making cold brew at home is easy. 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That's around 60 cups of cold brew for 50% off when you go to drinktrade.com Tim that's drinktrade.com Tim Get 50% off one month of cold brew. Drinktrade.com Tim so the MK Ultra thing, which seems like a CA mind control. Candace says they all have these weird links to like MK Ultra mind control and that Macron was like some weird Venturian candidate. Now Macron's a weird guy. Let's look at Macron is now saying he's going to bring in refugees from Gaza. But let's take a look at what's happening really going on. It feels weird. McCrone, if you can get that up, has just said, hey, I am going to accept refugees from Gaza. And he said, hey, this is what's going to happen. And everybody is going, well, isn't that nice that Macron is going to accept all of these refugees from Gaza. But what it really is, is a relocation campaign to take people from Gaza and put them in France so that Israel can build whatever the hell they're going to build in Gaza. So everyone's like, isn't it so nice? Look at France stepping up. And then. So people are saying this like. And then there's some people that are not dumb and they go, well, this seems like a relocation plan to put people that lived in Gaza in France. And so that Israel is just, you know, now controlled demolition. All these buildings of gods and they're going to build whatever they're going to build. Now Macron goes, well, now I'll take some of the heat off myself by going, hey, listen, we're, we're, we're recognizing a Palestinian state. Now Israel is like pretending to be mad at this, but this is a completely ceremonial thing because they just destroyed Gaza. It's over. What state could there. What are we talking about? Like, everyone's like, macron is. I can't believe he's. He's recognizing a Palestinian state. What is what. They destroyed the whole thing. It's in smithereens. The thing is, Kudan, it's the most. It's like a lot of the people coming out now and going, this seems a bit much with the starving. This seems a bit, you know, I, I've talked about it on the Patreon or whatever. A lot of celebrities now are coming out and going, I cannot believe. And they're so dramatic and they're like, what is happening? You know, they're all like half singing all the time, but it's like, well, there's no political risk in saying anything. Now this guy's recognizing a Palestinian state after it's literally been destroyed. It's literally like, destroyed. It's like the funniest thing in the world. It's literally been destroyed. What if. Hold on, hold on one second. What if Ghislaine Maxwell's like, brigitte Macron is a man. What if. That's the info she brings. She's like, I'll tell you one thing right away, I'll tell you one thing. First and foremost, Prashee. Macron as a cook. I knew it. And although it's known as Scott Cook. So here's our president on, on the Palestinian question. This is Macron, the Palestinian state issue that Donald Trump has asked about. And this is his response, counterproductive to France, for France to say that they would recognize the Palestinian state. Macron said that yesterday. Look, he's a different kind of a guy. He's okay. He's a team player pretty much. But here's the good news. What he says doesn't matter, you know, it's not going to change. Well, he made his way statement, friends. I guess we'll find out. With all the Ghislaine Maxwell testimony and discovery, maybe we'll find out why we have such a unwavering commitment to the Israeli project right now, perhaps, by the way. But, you know, it's insane, the level of, of, you know, supposedly Trump admonishes Netanyahu behind the scenes or whatever. But everything we do, we just kind of support this country. This new anti Semitism thing, which seems crazy, this law that is kind of being proposed here, and I'll actually send this to you where it's like, hey, you know, people are basically trying to equate, again, any criticism with anything that Israel wants to do with anti Semitism. And this is like they're trying to enshrine all of this into law. And I just texted you. But this is a, this is, this is becoming like, so insanely obvious to everybody who's watching this going, wait a minute, hold on, this doesn't make any sense. Jewish people are noticing this. People that live in Israel. Netanyahu's, you know, extending this war. And the longer he extends it, he's not in jail, he's not facing charges. It's obvious in the Ukraine what Zelensky is doing. He's extending the war. Now articles are coming out about how shady they are, how much money they're stealing in the Ukraine, how they're not trying any way to have peace. So here we go. Let's just take a look at this here. Legislation requires social media companies to release detailed public reports of violations of their terms of service and to outline how they're addressing these violations, which includes the use of their platforms by terrorist groups. Every day companies fail to report this information, it will result in a $5 million fine. Social media companies can no longer hide the crimes that take place on their platforms, especially when they pose a threat to America's national security. And we're very proud this bill has the backing of the Anti Defamation League. I saw anti Semitism for the first time when I was 15 years old. I had good parents who taught me it was wrong, but left a lasting impression of seeing my first incident as a teenager. And if you're on my social media, you see it every day from people that are responding back with what I consider clearly anti Semitic kind of messages on social media. I even saw a article today. It was about me, but talking about we have opposed congressmen who are pro Zionists. Right. And you're like, in other words, it's all over our social media and it's unacceptable. And what do I saw the protests I heard the last two days there was. Were vile, right? They were. You can see the anti Semitism in their comments and how they, how they were treating some of our members of congress who are Jewish. I saw, saw that firsthand. It's unacceptable. And so we want to be in a country that makes clear that anti Semitism or any kind of racism is repugnant, unacceptable, not allowed in my space. And we just zero tolerance for it. And people should feel like they're scorned for having, having this. These is in espousing these ideals. And we need to work with our social media companies to clean this up because what is going on is wrong. And I think it's further influencing other young. More people are more, you know, to be influenced by what they're saying. That's more that this is acceptable behavior. It is not. So we need to hold these companies accountable and work with them to take it. Okay, we get what they're doing here. We get what they're doing. Yeah. I mean drawing a line around any ism is always a problem. Saying that, like what constant. Now there's obviously very obvious examples of anti Semitism. We know that there's obvious examples of racism. There are obvious examples of whatever you want to say. Transphobia, homophobia, people hate trans people, hate gay people, don't like Jewish people don't like black people, hate them, whatever. But then there are also discussions about things, policies, positions, political statements. All of these things need to happen in a free society. And some of the people that engage in those discussions are going to be anti Semitic or they're going to say things in a way that's not elegant and they're not articulate or they're, they're just not good at having debates. Some of those people are going to be trolls. Some of those people are going to be trying to be funny. Some of those people are trying to be ironic. Some of those people hate everyone and are genuine Nazis. Right. Free speech is not for a bunch of people that you like and agree with and think are good all the time. Free speech has to be for everybody. And the way that you create a political space, and I believe in this project that, where you don't have extremism and, and, and you don't have neo Nazis running around and you don't have racist, you don't have all this craziness happening. The way that you create that political space is by trying to create a political culture where people can debate ideas, where people can be proven wrong and where, where people can exist without feeling that they're somehow being silenced or that there's forbidden information that they can't have and they're in the dark. And then the space in which all that information exists, they're, they're filling that void with whatever kind of ideas they want because they don't have the actual ones. You need to have an open space for dialogue and for debate. That's the only way to have certain ideas take prominence. The idea of owning a house, for example. Everyone wants to own a house. Every, that's a good idea. Ownership is a good idea. No matter how many people come in and tell you to rent or have more. You know Jillian Michaels, the fitness trainer who's at Turning Point usa, she's like, no, you should actually rent an income producing property and then years later you get rich. And then years later after that, whatever. Are there economic realities that she's talking about? Sure, but, but most people want to own a fucking house. That's an American idea. It's an idea that people believe in. No matter how many people tell you that renting is better or living, you know, in a smart city where everything's 15 minutes away and you never have to cut the grass or no matter who tells you that it's a better idea to own a house. It's an American idea. You shouldn't be afraid of people who tell you that the real thing is renting or the real thing is like, you know, using Uber and not owning a car. And the real thing is those are the better ways to do it. There are huge campaigns, by the way, put together by those companies that make just live in Airbnbs, just take Ubers, Just the gig economy. You'll own nothing and be happy. There's lots of money that's been put behind those ideas. But the idea of ownership is still an idea in America that's incredibly popular. I believe that the idea of like A live and let live society where you're not socially engineering other people is very popular in America. From the people that I talk to, maybe not to maniacs online, maybe not to people, you know, on the dark web or people wherever. But most people in America don't want social engineering. They don't want their children to be engineered. They do not want propaganda being delivered to them from the government. They just want a space where they can be happy, have necessities, have health care, compete with other people, follow whatever their life goal is and have their journey. That, to me is the goal of the entire country is to just have that. So I think in order to do that. So I, again, I don't think that medieval antisemitism is ever going to be really popular in America. I don't think genetic determinism is going to be popular saying to people, you're black, you can't compete. The IQ stuff, the shape of skulls, racist. Like, to me, yes, there's people online for sure where that's a big deal. But for the vast majority of people, they're just trying to survive. They're trying to figure out how to pay their rent. They're trying to figure things out. So I think that, like, when you create a political culture, in order to prevent it from sliding, going off the rails into extremism, you cannot, for the last 30, 50 years, immiserate people and make their lives materially worse where they don't. They can't redo their bathroom, they can't get a knee operation, their car breaks, they can't get to work, they're fucked. All of these people become radicalized because the material conditions of their life are much worse. That's obvious. Most of these people become. I was broke for years. The reason I didn't become like a psycho radical is I was doing comedy. I loved comedy. I loved the group of people I was with. We had a goal and we're all doing it. We all kind of understood that part of it was being broke and part of it was not having a ton of assurances that we were just out there taking risks. But there's a lot of people that, because their lives are going down the drain, start embracing pathologies. And when you tell people that, like, the Epstein files don't exist or that, you know, questioning Israel makes them anti Semitic or that they, they should be funding a genocide and then a starvation campaign, it drives people insane. It makes them actually crazy, as it would. So now the material conditions of their life are worse. Everything's a lie. People know it's a lie. The Ukraine war, remember that? I mean, they're stealing everything. Article after article is how much they're stealing over there. And there's no money to fix the roads in upstate New York or Pennsylvania or Detroit or Michigan, and fuck you. And when Marc Andreessen comes out and says, hey, the only jobs left are gonna be venture capitalists after AI takes over, and sorry, that's just the way it is. And again, I think these ICE raids are barbaric. But you do need to figure out a way to worry about American people. You, I don't think you should be deporting six year olds, throwing them in handcuffs, or, you know, people here that are here, that have been here for a while, they've roots in a community, they're doing a job. I think all of that is going to make the pendulum swing again to where no one cares and everybody's coming in. But you need to worry about America as a country and say, why is everything so fucked? And it's not one. We should be going after billionaires. Where is the E Verify shit? Why aren't we going after people that employ illegal immigrants? Is it because they're all Trump's friends? Why aren't we going after the guys like Steve Wynn and all these hotel magnets that employ all these people and choose not to pay American wages? Why aren't we doing that? So this is what drives people insane and it drives them crazy. To the left, to the right, wherever they go. Why am I watching some ICE show up at a graduation, but there's a billionaire on a private jet who employs illegal immigrants, who's not being arrested or detained or questioned? Why is that happening? This is what drives people insane. And then they go on the Internet and they get radicalized. So if you want people to stop being radicalized, it's not about banning things and burning books. And the right wing does it too. Although some of the books are a little crazy. But a gay character in a book, and the right wing runs and bans it because they're afraid their kids are going to become gay. You know, I understand when you're in fourth grade, but if you're in high school, you handle a book with a gay character. But some of the books are like, you know, I don't know, some of them are a little crazy. Like some of the. I've looked at some of the books, like, and I've looked them up and I'm like, wait a minute, why are we doing this? You know what I mean? Like some of the books are like, it's like Charlotte's Web, but it has, it's a. There's a vibrator in it. It's like, you know what I mean? Like, Charlotte teaches herself about self pleasure. That I don't think is great. But if you want the recipe for radicalization, which is seemingly what everybody's looking for right now, they're going, what is the recipe Radicalization? Why are certain people off the deep end? Why do people believe the world is flat or that space is completely fake? Why do some people believe Tom Hanks is a clone? You know, it's because the lies have gotten so verbose and people are now starting to go, wait a minute, what is real? What the hell's going on? So you can't make an entire population poor, poison their food, stress them out to the point where they're, they're anxiety ridden. It can be hard to talk about not being able to be hard to get hard. But HIMS is here to make things much easier. They're all online. 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With transparent, affordable plans Starting at just $5 a month, no hidden fees and zero interest, Kickoff helps you score big when it comes to credit. It's simple. You make on time payments. Credit bureaus see good behavior and your credit can go fast. I'll tell you this, I'll be very honest with you. I know I'm being hyperbolic, but the reality is if you do have bad credit in this country, you're fucked. Can't get anything. I just went through this with a friend of mine. It's so hard. You got to repair your credit. You got to start building credit with Kickoff today and you can get your first month for as little as $1. That's 80% off the normal price. When you go to get KickOff.com Tim, that's KickOff without the C. Get K-I K O F F.com Timickoff.com xxx to activate offer. Offer applies to new KickOff customers. First month only. Subject to approval. Offer subject to change. Average first year credit score impact of plus 84 points. Vanity Score 3.0 between January 2023 and January 2024 for kickoff credit account users who started with a score below 600, who paid on time, and who had no delinquencies or collections added to their credit profile during the period. Late payments may negatively impact your credit score. Individual results may vary. I mean, they just did a study, look this up. The World Happiness Report, which, by the way, is my favorite thing in the world. The World Happiness Report is, finds that young people in, you know, Western countries are unhappy and they're much less happy than they were like 15 years ago. Young people aren't as happy. And people are wondering why that is. Like, why are young people not as happy as they were? Is it technology? Is it social media? Here we are, young people in the west becoming unhappier. People are unhappy. And some people go, well, it's because now there are terms for mental health and we're talking more about mental health. And in my comedy special, I talk a little bit about that, that, that yes, people are more conscious of their mental health now than they've ever been in the past. And some of that's good. Some of that seems a little, you know, is a little suspect. There's a lot of people that seem to be cynically using their mental health. Here we go. Average happiness of young people is on the decline across the West. The shift has driven the US out of the top 20 happiest countries overall for the first time since reporting began. Lithuania took the top spot for young people. While it's under 30 population rating, Lithuania took the top spot for young. But the happiest people are in Lithuania. By the way, part of why this is okay is that young people now are looking at the world and going, is the country going to exist in 20 years? Are we going to have a. And by the way, not because of a foreign threat, not because we're going to be invaded, not because we're going to be nuked, but they're going. Is the country going to exist? Or are internal forces pulling the country apart? And are, are those people the young people in this study? The lower happiness reported by the younger under 30 in the United States and Canada is linked with lower levels of satisfaction and social support, lower satisfaction with living conditions, greater stress and anxiety, lower trust in government, and higher perceptions in corruption. Because people are looking around going, is this country even going to exist? It doesn't seem like it's going to exist. It seems to be way too corrupt to exist in 20 years. So what do you do? What? Wait a minute. By the way, most happy places for people who live under 30? Number one, Lithuania, number two, Israel. Maybe there's something to that ethno state concept. But so what I, what I'm saying here is that, like, everyone's running around now going, how do we prevent people from being radicalized? And going, becoming schizophrenic. Which I think is a good goal. But I think that part of that really has to look at the entire picture of, of, of what's going on right now. Younger people are sitting there wondering, does Brigitte have a cock? Will I afford a house? Is there a job for me? And there isn't. They're not. And she does. Those are the answers to those questions, but they're not. Is a country being run by pedophiles? Yes. Does Brigitte have a cock? Most likely. Am I going to afford a house? Not nearly. Do I have. What kind of job am I going to get? Nothing. Do you know what young people do now? If you're a young person, this is what you do. You graduate school. Let's give you a name. Let's give you a Name, your name. I'm going to give you a male and a woman. Sorry, non binaries. I'm just going to do a male and a woman right now. Okay? The male's name is Brett. His name is Brett. B R E T T. Brett. He is a 22 year old male. And then Carolyn, Carolyn is a 22 year old female. Okay? This is what happens to Carolyn and Brett. Carolyn went to nyu. She is a smarty pants. She's smart. Carolyn grew up in Rhode island and her parents were together and she's got a lovely home life and she has a nice older brother, but he ended up on drugs and he's just doing the best he can. But Carolyn went to NYU and she went to the Stern School of Business because she's going to take over the world and she loves all the female founders and she listens to fucking, you know, motivational speeches from that bitch who founded Bumble Whitney, fucking whatever Wolf heard and all these other people. And she's a badass finance bitch. And her, she wants. And her, her pet causes are women's literacy in the third world. She wants women in the third world to know more about money. And that's what she does. And her name is Carolyn. And she moves from Rhode island and she goes to nyu and she likes nyu and she's very liberal and all of her friends are very rich and she thinks Trump is gross and always has. And she's in love with a French guy, but he doesn't really love her and it's whatever, Carolyn. Okay, Carolyn. Okay. Brett grew up in a suburb outside of Chicago. Okay? Brett's father killed himself because he had undiagnosed mental illness. It was very difficult. He shot himself in their garage and Brett found him and half of his face was blown off. And Brett called the police and. But he knew it was no use because half of his father's face is in the garage. Brett's mother died of cancer early on. Okay? So Brett was living with his father who killed himself. Now he's 17 years old, so he's right on. He's right on the ledge of he's gonna be emancipated. He doesn't need a parent, okay? Now he doesn't get any real money from his father's health with his life insurance. His dad didn't have it, so he didn't have any life insurance. Okay? And they were renting. Here's the good news for Brett. Brett writes a great college essay and it's called I Found My Father's Body in The garage. And half of his head was gone. And so the. The people at the college admissions office. Because Brett is an A minus student. He's pretty fucking good, okay? And he's on the baseball team. He's not the star, but. But he's on it. And he writes an essay. I love baseball and I love playing baseball. It takes my mind off the time I found my father's body in the garage with half of his face gone. So Brett goes to Northwestern, pretty good school. And he plays baseball, okay. And his father's dead, okay? Carolyn's at the Stern School of Business. She wants women in Afghanistan to learn about, you know, bitcoin. Brett's at Northwestern trying to get over the trauma of his father who is sacrificed on the altar of globalization and. And Reagan letting all the mental hospitals out and no health care and whatever, okay? His father was also abusing pharmaceutical drugs and whatever. It just is what it is. He was also a drunk. So Brett's at Northwestern and Carolyn's in. In. In nyu. Now, Caroline and Brett never should have met, but Brett was traveling to New York City to see a friend he grew up with who was attending Pace, a much less reputable school. In fact. It's a piece of shit. It's a prison. But that's where retards go. And Brett knew a lot of retards grewing up in. Growing up in his town. So he goes to visit his buddy, and his buddy goes. Sometimes you go to these, like, cool bars with really hot chicks and they're all super rich, and it's not like they'll ever go out with us. But I fucked a model last month. And Brett's like, we're going. So they go to this bar. I don't know. I haven't been to bars in years. I don't know what they call it. They call it, uh, the. It's called. It's called the. The bar is just called Jew. J. U. It's a Japanese name. Now Brett is in this bar called Jew, and he meets Carolyn, who is a finance major at the Stern School of Business. She's graduating next year, and he's going to graduate next year, too. Brett, of course, has majored in education because maybe he'll be a gym teacher. Because he actually thinks it would be cool if he could help kids who had found their dead father in their garage get over it by connecting them to team sports, which he feels is one of the only reasons he hasn't killed himself. Okay, Caroline is outside, and Brett steps out. Brett's Not a smoker and never has been, but everyone's smoking and looks cool. So Brett decides to smoke a cigarette and Carolyn's outside and they start chatting. Where are you from? This, that and the other thing. One thing leads to the next, okay? They end up going home together and hooking up. This is very rare. Brett's not a Casanova. It doesn't happen all the time. Neither is Carolyn. Okay? But they decide they're gonna get married. They're going to make a go of this. Okay? After several months of dating long distance, Brett decides he's going to move to New York because Carolyn seems to be on some better financial footing. Okay? So he moves to New York and Carolyn and him start dating. Now the power dynamics a little off because she's got all the money and she's got all the friends and the world has kind of pushed her forward and there's nothing wrong with that, but she's got the fancy degree from the school and Brett feels a little cocked, but he goes with it cuz he doesn't really have a family. His father's head was all over the garage. Okay? Carolyn loves Brad. She treats him really nicely. She likes him. He's, he's a nice guy. He's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's pure and he's, he's simple. And she says that to her friends, like, he's pure, he's like a good guy. And I just love him. You know, he uprooted his whole life for me. Is this Midwestern guy and he likes sports and baseball and his dad blew off his head and his mother's dead, but he's a good guy. And then one day, Carolyn is having dinner on the Upper west side and the French guy that she was in love with two years prior passes. And he notices Caroline and he comes over and he says to her, how, oh my God, it's crazy to see you. And she's like, hi, how are you? Now this French guy is French aristocracy. He's got lots of money, an absurd amount of money. In fact, there's not that many people left in France with money. This guy's one of them. Caroline knows that, but it doesn't matter. It's filed away in the back of her head. He also has movie star good looks. But Carolyn's in a relationship with Brad, a regular Midwestern guy who watched his dad. We didn't watch him, but the body was still warm when he walked into the garage. You know, What? I mean, pretty sick of his dad to do that close to school. But Carolyn sees this French guy, Jacques, and she chats with Jacques, and you know what? She's gonna walk to get her Uber. And she decides that she'll. And he goes, well, maybe I'll just walk with you. And she goes, okay. And they chat. She doesn't mention that she's seeing anyone. But it doesn't come up. It doesn't come up. Why would it come up? Okay. And he said, I. I'd love to see you again. We should go. And we should go to this opening of this gallery. My friend in Soho, my cokehead friend, who has no talent, has rented a gallery in soho and she's inflicting a mediocre art on people. Let's all go down there and see what that's about. And she, living downtown, sees no reason not to attend a very public art gallery show in soho with an old friend. It's not a big deal. She's not cheating on this Midwestern guy who's so pure and simple, his father killed himself in the garage. So Carolyn, from the Stern school of Business, who cares that women get Bitcoin so they can transcend the circumstances of living in an Afghan cave, decides to go to the opening of a mediocre artist in soho with Jacques, a very wealthy French guy who all the while, her simple, pure, Midwestern, beautiful boy. Beautiful, you know, life that they have together. She calls him a boy. He doesn't love that, but she does. And she realizes it's just because he doesn't have a lot of money and he doesn't come from anything. Okay? She decides to go to this gallery opening with Jacques. Well, the gallery opening becomes a lunch, and the lunch becomes a coffee. And then she eventually has to tell Jacques, listen, I'm actually in a relationship, but I don't know what the hell's going on here, okay? But Jacques says, listen, I totally understand, but here's the reality. You're graduating school next year. I've always loved you. I never thought you loved me. We're meant to be together. We're meant to get married at my family's vineyard in the south of France. You know it and I know it, so what are we doing here? And she walks home and she's crying, and it's cold and it's wet and it's raining, but she knows the jock is right. She knows that she's going to go and marry this rich guy and she's going to destroy this man, this Midwestern Guy who's a good guy. And she goes home and they have a talk and she says, listen, Brett, go away. Listen, Brett, you know I love you and these two years have been the best years of my life. But I just feel like there's too many things here that will just never work. I think we want different lives. You know, you mentioned that you love the Midwest and that you'd like to go back one day and I could never see myself living there. He goes, yeah, but that's just something I say. I mean, I uprooted my whole life for you. I kind of like New York. I actually love the pizza. I thought I'd never like anything better than the tavern style Chicago pizza, but I actually love the pizza here. She goes, here's the thing. This isn't about pizza, Brett. It's not about food. It's about the fact that I met a guy and I'm in love with him. And I'm sorry. Now Brett is hollowed out. He's hollowed out. He's absolutely. He's vacant. There's nothing. He's angry. And then the anger translates into a hopelessness. It's a stage four diagnosis. It's, we've denied the appeal to death row. He knows immediately, as soon as those words leave her mouth that there is nothing to be said and nothing to do, that he can't compete with this guy, this fairy tale French rich guy and she's been in love with forever because he's gonna provide her a type of life that Brett can't. So he then gets a small apartment in Manhattan. He moves out cuz he'd been living with Caroline for the last eight months. He started out in a small apartment, then he's living with her in a little bigger apartment in a better location. But he moves to Brooklyn, okay, He moves to Brooklyn. He says, fuck it, I'm gonna start moving to Brooklyn. I'm going to live in Brooklyn now because who cares? I just want to get laid. I want to do drugs and I want to just be angry. My, my fucking girl threw me. And Carolyn keeps going and that's where her part of the story ends. We don't know what happens to Caroline. She gets engaged to this French guy, she gets really wealthy, she gets really rich. They split their time between France and the United States. She has a fake job and so does he. But Brett, Brett's now living in Brooklyn. And Brett oscillates from the far left to the far right. One day he's a literal neo Nazi, the next day He's a far left anarcho communist. And all the while, he listens to the Tim Dillon show every day. Every day. He has no idea which way I'm gonna go. He has no idea. He just knows I'm angry at things and he likes that. And he listens to my show. But one day he's in Antifa, and the next day he's a proud boy. He's just angry. He's a hateful hatred. He's full of hatred because the rent keeps going up and nothing makes sense. I don't know what this has to do with anything, really, economically. I thought it would say more about the economy than it actually did. But my point is this. We've empowered certain women at the expense of men that have found their fathers dead in their thing. I mean, it's true. So that's what I'm getting to. So this guy's now a radical because we made this woman fall in love with French people, which is disgusting. That's what happens. And Brett dies of an accidental overdose in Bushwick, and his body is found by his Chinese landlord. You see, I made the landlord Chinese. I could have went another way, but it was a Chinese landlord and they found Brett's body and they couldn't call his dad. His dad's already dead. Sad. This is. This is what's happening to young people all over the country. Well, it is. It's the summer. So many people are injuring themselves, and then they need their money. A client of Morgan and Morgan had recently been awarded nearly 1 million after jurors affirmed that her injuries from slipping on ice outside of a Panera bread with a company's fault. Their client was working as a doordash driver when she slipped and fell on an icy walkway outside the Panera in Fort Wayne, Indiana. She broke her left elbow, which led to surgery and hardware being inserted into her arm. The original settlement offered was $125,000. But Morgan and Morgan fought to get her what she deserved. Morgan and Morgan is America's largest injury firm for a reason. They've been fighting for the people for over 35 years. Hiring the wrong firm can be disastrous. Hiring the right firm could substantially increase your. Can you imagine that? You're going. And you go, oh, I'm going to pick up the door dash. I'm going to get this southwestern fucking corn chowder from Panera and the Asiago Chicken Club, which is nice. And then you. Then you fall on the ice and you go, ah, help me, help me with Morgan and Morgan, it's easy to get started and they're free. Then their fee is free unless they win. Visit for the People.com Tim or dial pound law pound529 from your cell phone. That's F O R the People.com or click the link in the description below. This is a paid advertisement. There's a time and a place for a filet of fish, but breakfast is for sausage biscuits. McDonald's breakfast comes first. You're great at protecting your own personal information. You probably even use things like two factor authentication, strong passwords and a vpn. But as much as you try to be in control of how your information is protected, there are lots of places that also have it and they might not be as careful as you are. That's why LifeLock monitors millions of data points every second for identity threats. If your identity is stolen, a LifeLock US based restoration specialist will help solve identity theft issues on your behalf, guaranteed or your money back. Plus, all LifeLock plans are backed by the million dollar protection package, meaning LifeLock will reimburse you up to the limits of your plan. If you lose money due to identity theft. You might not be able to control how others handle your personal information, but you can help protect it. With LifeLock, save up to 40% your first year. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code IHEART or go to lifelock.com iheart for 40% off terms. Apply. Tim Dillon comedy.com We do have dates in the fall and what we do and Brigitte actually does have to come out and show it. Show it. Light it up. Tell us what you got. There's nothing wrong with it, but it is happening. The thing I described is happening. Men don't have great jobs and they're moving to these cities and then women are promising them stuff and then going with a French person. And that calls into the ideas like, what is a nation state? Well, it, it actually does. What is a nation state? What are we? Who are we? What do we want to be? What do we owe each other? Show the puss. Appreciate. I just love. I mean, this headline is just too funny. Hillary Clinton uncontrolled fits of anger and heavy tranquilizer use and happiness. She was also very happy, but that's okay. All right, folks, well, we're going to get out of here. We have an interview right now with someone who supports Gaza. Or maybe we played that in the beginning of the show. Should we play in the beginning or at the end? Beginning. All right, so we played it at the beginning. Just Lane is testifying we'll see what happens. Seems like Trump's done. Seems like the administration's kind of cooked. Feels like people are circling. They smell blood. Who inherits it? Is it Tucker? Is it J.D. people think Tucker's running. He says he's not running, but it feels a little bit like he's running. We don't know. Lots of things to follow. Lots of stories that are developing all the time. Tim DillonComedy.com Tickets for shows in the fall if you want to see them. Thank you again. Bye Bye. You're great at protecting your own personal information. You probably even use things like two factor authentication, strong passwords and a vpn. But as much as you try to be in control of how your information is protected, there are lots of places that also have it and they might not be as careful as you are. That's why LifeLock monitors millions of data points every second for identity threats. If your identity is stolen, a LifeLock US based restoration specialist will help solve identity theft issues on your behalf, guaranteed or your money back. Plus, all LifeLock plans are backed by the million dollar protection package, meaning LifeLock will reimburse you up to the limits of your plan if you lose money due to identity theft. You might not be able to control how others handle your personal information, but you can help protect it with LifeLock. Save up to 40% your first year. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code IHEART or go to lifelock.com iheart for 40% off. Terms apply. Hey everyone, this is Carrie Champion, the host of Naked Sports. The all new 2025 Nissan Armada Pro 4X provides freedom. Freedom to explore, to go wherever you want with your whole crew and all your toys. With a twin turbo V6 engine, £8,500 of towing capacity and and seating for eight, this unshakable fortress of a vehicle is built to take you on your next adventure. Drive the all new 2025 Nissan Armada today. Learn more at nissanusa.com intelligent four wheel drive cannot prevent collisions or provide enhanced traction in all conditions. Always monitor traffic and weather conditions. There's a time and a place for a filet of fish, but breakfast is for sausage biscuits. Yep, sit in the hip like McDonald's, breakfast comes first.