Summary of "Don't Rain on Trump's Military Birthday Parade" Episode of The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

Podcast Information:

• Title: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
• Host: NBC Universal
• Description: The Tonight Show is the longest-running talk show on television and the #1 late-night program on digital. New episodes feature Jimmy Fallon’s latest monologue, extended interviews with celebrity guests, sketches, games, stand-up, and more, airing weekday mornings (Tuesday-Friday).
• Episode: Don't Rain on Trump's Military Birthday Parade | Julianne Moore, Marc Maron, Jurnee Smollett, Tommy Brennan | Thursday, June 12
• Release Date: June 13, 2025

1. Opening Monologue and Father's Day Jokes [00:00 - 05:43]

Jimmy Fallon kicks off the episode with a humorous take on Father's Day, showcasing a series of comically flawed Father's Day cards. His monologue is filled with witty one-liners that highlight the quirks of fatherhood, eliciting laughs from both the live audience and listeners.

Notable Quotes:

• "Father's Day is almost here, and a lot of people are still shopping for that perfect card." [01:00]
• "This card says, 'Dad, you’re always there for me.' Open it up, it says, 'unless Bosch is on.'" [01:20]
• "Another one says, 'I don’t know anyone else.' Open it up, 'Who bought their clothes and their TV from the same store?'" [01:40]

Following the monologue, Jimmy transitions into a satirical news segment focusing on former President Donald Trump hosting a congressional picnic and preparing for a large military parade celebrating his birthday. Fallon humorously critiques the event's logistics and political undertones, incorporating playful jabs at public figures like Elon Musk and Mitch McConnell.

Notable Quotes:

• "Trump personally grilled all the burgers on his tanning bed, but was well done or burnt to a Crisp." [03:00]
• "Democrats are secretly hoping lightning strikes during the parade because a Freaky Friday situation might be the only way to get back in the White House." [04:20]

Jimmy further breaks down the parade's details with comedic comparisons, intertwining the actual numbers with exaggerated, humorous parallels.

Notable Quotes:

• "There’re 150 military vehicles involved in the parade, but it's also the number of times Eric Trump will ask, 'When do I get to see Bluey?'" [05:43]
• "140,000 pounds — that’s how much each tank weighs, and also how many times Trump will check his phone for a B-day text from Putin." [05:50]

2. Promotion of Mo Willems' Book and Unintentional Self-Promotion [06:00 - 10:04]

In a heartfelt segment, Jimmy Fallon gives a shout-out to children's author Mo Willems, celebrating his number one New York Times bestseller, Will the Pigeon Graduate? However, the promotion takes an unintended turn when Fallon discovers his own book, Papa Doesn't Do Anything, is listed as the second bestseller. This leads to a humorous and relatable interaction with his brother Billy Fallon, highlighting the awkwardness of unintentional self-promotion.

Notable Quotes:

• "My book Papa Doesn't Do Anything is available for Father's Day." [08:32]
• "This is a complete nightmare for me. And right now I am shook." [08:16]
• "I love every one of his books. He’s like a modern day Dr. Seuss." [08:45]

3. Interview with Julianne Moore [11:27 - 20:35]

Guest: Julianne Moore
Projects Discussed: Sirens (Netflix), Echo Valley (Apple TV+), Stick (Apple TV series)

Julianne Moore joins the show to discuss her recent and upcoming projects. Fallon praises her performance in Sirens and shares anecdotes about her co-stars, including Jurnee Smollett and Sydney Sweeney. Moore humorously recounts her experience working with trained falcons on set, providing entertaining behind-the-scenes insights.

Notable Quotes:

• "In the first episode of the show, I have a falcon that I'm supposed to be releasing into the wild. It's a female and they don't want to work." [14:09]
• "This is an Emmy and Oscar-winning actress who you can see in the hit Netflix series Sirens." [11:27]
• "Echo Valley is about a daughter who shows up to her mom’s doorstep, covered in blood." [19:19]

Moore also delves into her character’s emotional depth in Echo Valley and the challenges of filming intense scenes, offering listeners a glimpse into her acting process.

4. Interview with Marc Maron [21:27 - 31:04]

Guest: Marc Maron
Topics Discussed: Ending his podcast WTF with Marc Maron, his role in the Bruce Springsteen biopic, and the new Apple TV series Stick.

Marc Maron talks about his decision to conclude his influential podcast after 16 years, reflecting on its impact on the podcasting medium and his personal growth. He shares amusing stories about interviewing Bruce Springsteen for the biopic I Cannot Wait and his experiences infiltrating the music legend’s creative space.

Notable Quotes:

• "We decided we're gonna put it to bed. We're gonna stop. We're gonna not do it anymore." [22:03]
• "Somebody's gonna get fired. It's just going to be ridiculous." [10:00]
• "When you make your girlfriend cry, it just doesn't feel as good. Or I'm kidding. I've never won." [43:00]

Maron humorously discusses his limited acting role in the Springsteen movie, emphasizing the contrast between his podcast persona and on-screen presence.

5. Interview with Jurnee Smollett [34:57 - 38:37]

Guest: Jurnee Smollett
Projects Discussed: Smoke (Apple TV+), her role in Sirens, and her personal life.

Jurnee Smollett shares her experiences filming Sirens and discusses her new Apple TV+ series, Smoke. She opens up about her son's adorable attempts to emulate his mother's fitness routines and the challenges of balancing her professional and personal life. Additionally, Smollett delves into the intense and emotionally charged nature of her role in Smoke, highlighting the physical transformation and emotional depth required.

Notable Quotes:

• "My son is obsessed with sports and athletes. He really wants to have a muscular build at 8." [35:34]
• "Michelle, my character in Smoke, is someone who pushes herself really hard and has a lot of childhood trauma that she pours into various outlets." [37:06]
• "I did my trainer, Jeanette Jenkins, and I put on a total of 20 pounds to feel more muscular." [37:17]

Smollett’s candid discussion about her portrayal of a troubled detective and the rigorous preparation she undertook provides listeners with an insightful look into her craft.

6. Segment with Tommy Brennan [38:54 - 45:16]

Guest: Tommy Brennan
Topics Discussed: His upcoming stand-up performances at Sisyphus Comedy Club and interactions with other guests.

Tommy Brennan appears to discuss his stand-up routines and upcoming performances. Although brief, the segment highlights his comedic style and chemistry with fellow guests like Marc Maron.

Notable Quotes:

• "You’re a trained assassin who's been reassigned as a traffic cop." [44:17]
• "I've never won an argument against my girlfriend and then been like, dang, the vibes in here are chill as hell." [44:42]

His humorous take on personal relationships and self-deprecating humor adds a light-hearted element to the episode.

7. Closing Remarks and Musical Performances [45:16 - End]

Jimmy Fallon wraps up the show by thanking all guests, including Julianne Moore, Marc Maron, Jurnee Smollett, and Tommy Brennan, commending their performances and contributions to the episode. The show concludes with musical performances and upbeat sign-offs, leaving the audience entertained and looking forward to future episodes.

Notable Quotes:

• "My thanks to Juliet [Julianne] Moore, Marc Maron, Jurnee Smollett, Tommy Brennan, once again, well done. That was great. And the Roots right there from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Good night, everybody." [45:33]
• "Thanks for listening to The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon. Don't forget to subscribe to get the latest episodes weekday mornings. Wherever you get your podcasts." [46:12]

Conclusion:

This episode of The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon masterfully blends humor, celebrity interviews, and engaging discussions about current projects. From Fallon’s witty monologue on Father’s Day to in-depth conversations with high-profile guests like Julianne Moore and Marc Maron, the show offers a rich variety of content. Notable moments include Maron’s reflections on ending his podcast and Smollett’s insights into her role in Smoke. Tom Brennan’s comedic segments add an extra layer of laughter, making this episode both entertaining and informative for listeners.