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Jimmy Fallon
From Studio 6P in Rockefeller center in the heart of New York City, it's a Tonight show starring Jimmy Valent. Tonight joins Jimmy Naz, Nikki Glazer, Hazel park, pose of the St. John. And featuring Steve legendary Ruth her 2113. And now here he is, Jimmy Bella ra. Thank you very much. Enjoy yourself. Welcome, everybody. Welcome, welcome, welcome to the Tonight Show. You're here. Thank you very much. Thanks for watching. Well, guys, the White House just announced that they are now seeking corporate sponsors for this year's Easter Egg Roll. Seriously, how bad is the price of eggs when the government needs a sponsor? It's like me undies. When asked if it's appropriate to sell sponsorship at the White House, Trump said, it's actually called the Papa John's White House. Some more news from Washington. I read that the US Is targeting a truce agreement between Ukraine and Russia by April 20th. Yeah, yeah, right. Hey, if people can't find peace on 420, it's never gonna happen. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. They picked a 420 deadline. Although if there's two things that don't go together, it's 420 and deadlines. That's what I'm. Trump had a busy weekend. It started with a briefing at the Pentagon, then he flew to Philadelphia for the NCAA wrestling championship. Yeah, his schedule is always packed. It's a lot to take in, but I'll catch you up. Friday, briefing. Saturday, wrestler. Sunday, briefing. Monday, buy a Tesla. Tuesday, yell about the border, Give the finger to reporters. Wednesday, give a brand new order, Put my face on every quarter. Education, don't need that. Just give K a new iPad. Get a phone call. Who is that? Omg, I think it's Vlad. Work in golf. Get lowest score. Add my face to Mount Rushmore. Work, then golf. A perfect drive. JFK is still alive. Golf, work 10. Golf. So much stamina. Tariff, tariff. Invade Canada. Work. Golf 10. Need a break for POTUS. I'll book a stay at the White Lotus. Thank. Not gonna look at me. Not even gonna look at me. Not even gonna make eye contact. Not even gonna look at me, dad.
Nikki Glaser
Not even gonna look at your son.
Jimmy Fallon
And be proud that he rapped in front of millions of people.
Randall Park
I wanted to. I wanted you to make it through. I know if I made eye contact.
Jimmy Fallon
I was running out of breath by the end. I'm like, okay, well, switching gears, Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez are getting married this summer. And they just sent out their wedding invites. Ooh. Yeah, it's gonna be great. Thanks to Amazon, the cake will arrive in 38 separate boxes. It's the bride, that's the groom. Some business news. I read that 23andMe just filed for bankruptcy. The company said that they were 50% sad, 37% disappointed and 13% Scottish. Yes. The worst news to hit the DNA testing business since Maury was canceled. That's a good joke. Great joke. The worst thing to happen to DNA tested since Maury was canceled. Yeah. Hey, I saw that the USDA recalled nearly £30,000 of Chomps beef sticks after pieces of metal were found inside them. Wow, this is really going to affect the menu at Jeff Bezos wedding. Meanwhile, Slim Jim's is like only the finest pieces of wood in our stuff. You guys hear about this? Everyone is okay. But I heard that visitors had to flee a new ride at Disney World after a fire broke out. Yeah, but this is nice. For $30, you could buy a picture of you and your family escaping the towering inferno. Cool. And finally, guys, a lot of people are on spring break right now and it's very important. Oh, my goodness. It's Nikki Glaser, guys. Thank you.
Bozoma St. John
I'm so sorry.
Jimmy Fallon
Why are you out here?
Bozoma St. John
I had no idea the door went out here.
Jimmy Fallon
You didn't know the.
Bozoma St. John
Yeah, that.
Jimmy Fallon
What?
Bozoma St. John
I'm sorry I'm out here. So stupid. I had no idea that door let out here.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah. The door that says two stage.
Bozoma St. John
Yeah. Yeah. I was just looking for a place to vape.
Steve
I just started today.
Bozoma St. John
Understood.
Jimmy Fallon
That could be a little confusing.
Bozoma St. John
Yeah, there's going to vape around here.
Jimmy Fallon
No, there isn't. No. We have to get a spot.
Bozoma St. John
But you know, since I'm out here, I feel like, oddly compelled to talk about the dangers of spring break. You know, it's actually a cause that's really near and dear to my heart. You know, every celebrity needs a cause.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah. That is your great. Well, let's break down the do's and don'ts of spring break. Here we go. First up, do catch some rays.
Bozoma St. John
Ooh, yeah. Don't. Don't catch some crabs.
Jimmy Fallon
Okay, I see. Okay. Next up, do go to bottomless brunch.
Bozoma St. John
Yes. Don't go to brunch. Bottomless.
Jimmy Fallon
That's true. That's good.
Bozoma St. John
That's how you catch those crabs.
Jimmy Fallon
Also, do obey. All local.
Bozoma St. John
Yep. Please do don't buy weed off the 19 year old bellhop just by raising your eyebrows at it. It can be done.
Jimmy Fallon
Well, it does work.
Bozoma St. John
Yeah.
Jimmy Fallon
Next up, do be the star on the dance floor.
Nikki Glaser
Oh, yeah.
Bozoma St. John
Don't. Don't be the star of the Dateline episode called Murder at Margarita Femme. It's bad.
Jimmy Fallon
It's bad. This next one's flipped. Okay, yeah. Don't get drunk and get a tattoo.
Bozoma St. John
Okay. But do get drunk and get a tattoo removed. See, no one does that.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah. That saves you the pain.
Bozoma St. John
Yes. Painful process. Get wasted.
Jimmy Fallon
Also, do visit the US Virgin Islands. Mm.
Bozoma St. John
And don't be shocked when you Google US Virgin. And JD Bance shows up. Don't be shocked by that. I'm warning you.
Jimmy Fallon
Okay, next, do use plenty of tanning oil.
Bozoma St. John
Don't use plenty of baby oil. Diddy ruined that for everyone. And there's none left. There's none left.
Jimmy Fallon
There's none left.
Nikki Glaser
Thousands of bottles of thousands.
Bozoma St. John
Thousands.
Jimmy Fallon
And finally, do drink responsibly.
Bozoma St. John
Yes. Oh, and actually, I actually agree with this one. I'm gonna say do drink responsibly. Cause I have my own new vodka called responsibly. Yes. So please drink responsibly. Responsibly.
Jimmy Fallon
Oh, that's what I'm talking. Mickey Glaser, everybody.
Steve
I vowed.
Bozoma St. John
I vowed.
Jimmy Fallon
Come on.
Bozoma St. John
See you later.
Jimmy Fallon
We have a Give it up for the rooftop.
Randall Park
Let's have it, Mr. Omasses. Drop top rips. My joints could go hatless. Voice bits and ribs is so savage. Making CC Soap alone.
Jimmy Fallon
She's one of my favorites. What a show we have for her tonight. She is a hilarious comedian who you can see on her alive and unwell stand up tour from now through October. Nikki Glaser is here. You know, star. She's here. We'll talk with her. Plus, he's a very talented actor who stars in the new series the Residence, which is streaming now on Netflix. Randall park is joining us. Good actor. Funny dude. She stars on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, which airs its season finale tomorrow at 8pm on Bravo and streams the next day on peacock. Bozema St. John is here. Guys, it is time for our latest installment of tonight's show, polls. Here we go.
Randall Park
Tonight, show polls.
Jimmy Fallon
These are similar to do's and don'ts, but they're not. But they're not at all. This is polls. That is correct. These are polls. Yeah, yeah. Percentages and stuff like that. People love polls. Kids love polls. Kids love polls. Everybody loves graphs. They love charts. Pie charts. Venn diagrams.
Bozoma St. John
Love that.
Jimmy Fallon
No, If I'm out with a crowd in spring. Braids. Yeah. Kids. I go, what do you guys like? And they go. They all go, data. Yeah. Raw data.
Bozoma St. John
We love raw data.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah, they love data, man. I go crunching numbers. Dude, let's party tonight. That's why this is so topical this week. It really is. Every poem about to go through is so topical and amazing. Wow. That. Yeah. You probably won't. You'll go home. You won't forget this. Yeah. You may not laugh, but you may not laugh. No, absolutely not. You don't have to laugh at anything. Yeah. These are all facts. These are basically facts. Yeah. Well, let me show you what this is. The first poll asked, how do you file your taxes? 20% said TurboTax. 20% said H&R block. 60% said by copy pasting everything from last year and praying no one notices. It's very easy. This next poll asks, do you think America needs an Education Department? 80% said yes. 40% said no. 30% said, how many percents can there be total?
Bozoma St. John
Preach.
Jimmy Fallon
Next poll asks, are you flirting with me right now? 20% said no. 80% said, what? No. Oh, my God, stop. That is so funny. Why would I do that? We're having. We're having good. We're having a good. We're having a good. Why would I say that? We're having. We're having fun. We're having fun. We're having. I say, well, we're having a good. Can't believe. Who'd have a. I can't believe I said that. My floor here. My floor is not here yet. But anyway, pleasure to meet you and I hope you enjoy your elevator ride. This next poll asks, would you like to see a dessert menu? 100% said, oh, we shouldn't. Then 100% said, okay, fine, we'll take a look then. 100% said, One giant jumbo brownie lava cake explosion deluxe, please. This next one asks, what do you use to fall asleep? 20% said white noise. 20% said an eye mask. 60% said having a co worker tell me their theories on severance. I think, I think the whole thing has been a dream. Next poll asks, pizza or sushi? 49% said sushi. 50% said pizza. That one friend said, anything. I'm easy, just not sushi or pizza. Last one asks, how do you keep warm in the spring? 10% said light jacket. 20% said vest. 30% said flannel shirt. 40% said by standing next to burning Teslas. There you have it. That's all we have. Tonight's show. Polls stick around. We'll be right back with Nikki Glazer.
Randall Park
Call it Captain Rock. I started at the bottom. Now the Costa del Tomato head Mothers are imposter. It's a worn out process.
Jimmy Fallon
Our first guest is a very funny comedian who is currently on her Alive and Unwell standup tour across the U.S. canada, and Australia from now through October. Please welcome Nikki Glaz. Welcome back to the Tonight Show. Thank you so much.
Bozoma St. John
Is this what it's like to be first guest?
Jimmy Fallon
Yes, of course it is.
Nikki Glaser
I made it.
Jimmy Fallon
Of course it is.
Bozoma St. John
I made it.
Jimmy Fallon
Of course it is. I want to take a moment to say what a fantastic job you did hosting the Golden Globes this past. You got it. That was a home run. Thank you, Timmy.
Bozoma St. John
I learned so much from you. You've done it before. It's crazy.
Jimmy Fallon
That was a home run.
Bozoma St. John
Oh, my God. Thank you so much. Did the prompter go out for you on yours?
Jimmy Fallon
When I hosted the Prompter, I completely went out. Yeah. I walked out on stage ready to do. I had a giant, big musical opening. Did the musical opening. I came out. I'm like, ha. And 15 jokes. Just. The monitor went out.
Bozoma St. John
My God.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah. And there was, like, an X over then I saw typing. I saw, like, a prompt, and someone was typing to, like, reboot the system.
Bozoma St. John
Oh, my God. Lol.
Randall Park
Yeah.
Jimmy Fallon
No, they were like. I was like, yeah, reboot the system. Oh, my God. It felt like 45 minutes of silence.
Bozoma St. John
Oh, I'm sure.
Jimmy Fallon
And then they had a backup monitor that was behind the broken monitor so I could see the top of jokes. Oh, no, the president's in the.
Bozoma St. John
That is a. That was, like, nightmares I was having leading up to it. You lived that, dude.
Jimmy Fallon
I don't know what happened, but I think someone said that, like, I think a photographer unplugged.
Bozoma St. John
No.
Jimmy Fallon
Does that make any sense? No.
Bozoma St. John
It was the Academy Awards. They were like.
Jimmy Fallon
We wanted them to host. We wanted them to host. Yeah.
Randall Park
But it's like.
Jimmy Fallon
It was crazy. It was like.
Bozoma St. John
That's nuts.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah. It was wild. You got. You have to take a lap and enjoy all this and wave. You did really well.
Bozoma St. John
Thank you, man.
Jimmy Fallon
It was classy. It was funny. It was just enough. It was hard. It was edgy, but it was. And you look great. It was really.
Bozoma St. John
I get so much from you. It really does.
Jimmy Fallon
Thank you for saying you look fantastic.
Bozoma St. John
Thank you.
Jimmy Fallon
You feel great.
Nikki Glaser
Yeah.
Bozoma St. John
You know, this takes a lot of work. This is a mirage, what you're seeing before you. Yeah. You know, to look good, you have to feel. I mean, I'm wearing, like, a compression sock for my stomach. It's like the arm cuff at CVS that takes your blood pressure. It's so tight. But it makes you look snatched. Like, this is Good.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Bozoma St. John
Thank you. I was waiting for that. The thing about these is if you've worn one before, okay, so it's like, it sucks you into. And then it's a thong in the front. I don't want to get too graphic, but it's a thong in the front, and then it's. So it's like. It's through the night. It, like, moves up and it, like, starts bullying you. Like, it starts, like, giving you a wedgie.
Jimmy Fallon
Okay.
Bozoma St. John
If. If you saw what was underneath this, it looks like I'm cutting clay, you know, like, it's painful, Jimmy. And there's no snaps when you have to, you know, so it's just soaked in urine. It's.
Jimmy Fallon
Oh, my God. It's terrible.
Bozoma St. John
I'll pay for this.
Jimmy Fallon
I think you look fantastic.
Bozoma St. John
Thank you. Well, thank you. Wait till the facelift that's coming.
Jimmy Fallon
Really?
Bozoma St. John
August 2026.
Jimmy Fallon
No, you don't do it.
Bozoma St. John
No, I'm gonna do it. I have no problem with that. You know, you gotta do it subtly. Cause you have to do it so they go, like, what's she doing? And you can just go. Just meditating more, you know, just. Cause I'm doing the type of meditation that removes your eyelid skin. It's just this new. That's what they say. I'm drinking more water, you know, going on hikes. I'm just working on my gut health. So. My brow has been lowered 2 inches, you guys. Oh, yes.
Jimmy Fallon
Yes.
Bozoma St. John
That's what happened. Cause, yeah, you can't get a drastic nose job. You just gotta subtly go in every so often. And then people just go, it's not a nose job. It's erosion. Like, I guess that's what. That's what you do. That's how you get away with it. So that's what I'm gonna do. I think it's a wise investment. You know, I think that there's kind of a stigma around getting facework or, like, investing in your beauty and doing all these procedures. And there is, like, maybe a little bit of a sadness to it, but I kind of also am like, well, it makes my life better. People treat you better when you're hotter. It's just a fact. It's a sad fact of life. It is. You know, and it's. You know, and everyone goes, that's so sad. Why don't you love the way you were born? And it's like, well, why did you go to college? Why don't you love the brain you were born with? Like, why did you. Why did you pay thousands of dollars to that institution. Just, oh, that's not a good example for your daughter that you are learning about World War I. She doesn't know about it. She wasn't born with that knowledge, you know? So I just feel like I'll just do it, you know, why not?
Jimmy Fallon
What do you think about all the Ozempic and all that stuff?
Bozoma St. John
Oh, I love it. I'm like, do it, do it. I have no judgment. If you want to do Ozempic, hell yeah, girl. Like, I'm not. I want people to feel more comfortable talking about doing it. Cause I feel like there's, like, this shame. And the shame is only from thin people who want you to stay fat. Like, that's really where it's coming from. They're so mad that you're getting thin now. Cause that's all they have, right? You have, like, you're dynamic. You have a good personality.
Jimmy Fallon
That's so funny.
Bozoma St. John
And they're like, no, they're so mad. But they can't say. They can't say it right. They just go, no, you're stealing medicine from diabetics who need it. Like, that's their excuse. Like anyone's ever cared about someone with diabetes who doesn't have it. Like, that's. I do. I'm saying other people. Like, it's suddenly all these thin white women are like, diabetics need their meds. It's like, no, I think you're upset that Kathy Bates has a thigh gap. Like, I think that's. Maybe she's coming for you. That's more what it could be about, I think.
Jimmy Fallon
Can we talk about the tour?
Bozoma St. John
Let's talk about the tour.
Jimmy Fallon
Alive and unwell.
Bozoma St. John
Yeah, that's what I am.
Jimmy Fallon
Look at all of these data. Look at all these going around the world.
Bozoma St. John
They're everywhere. It's crazy around me. There's so much travel, and I don't know. But you travel a lot, right? Like, are you a nervous flyer?
Jimmy Fallon
No, I'm getting better at it now.
Bozoma St. John
You have to, because it's just like, you're on planes all the time. You have to get used to it. And I felt like I was really over any kind of fear of flying. Like, almost zero until recently when there started to be, like, four plane crashes a day. Now it's a little disconcerting. There's new fears with flying. I used to be like, oh, crashes, terrorism. Now it's like, the door could fall off. Your plane could land upside down. Elon Musk's like, penis rocket would like, Explode and shrapnel would fly in your engine. Like there's new fears. My biggest fear used to be I'd sit next to a guy with a story to tell, you know, like that used to be, you know the guy, dude, that guy.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah, I know that guy.
Bozoma St. John
He'd still be telling you that story as you exited off the plane on the wing as it's burning. He'd be like, my son's LSAT scores came in and we're actually really excited about his. Yeah, it's. I put it on the noise canceling headphones. That always works. So I kind of send people a message like, I don't want to talk.
Jimmy Fallon
Yes.
Bozoma St. John
But then they kind of, they'll like angle like this. And I go, yeah, uh huh. And he goes, do those work? I'm like, apparently not.
Jimmy Fallon
I don't want to talk to you.
Nikki Glaser
Yeah, yeah.
Bozoma St. John
You wear those things. They do like, cut out the world. Like I'm always going through airports, like blasting music, noise canceling. And I'm kind of used to going through airports so much now that I just like, can just do it almost like blindly. Muscle memory. I was late for a flight recently and I was running through the terminal. I see my flight boarding. I'm like, oh, yes. And it's like on group one, I thought I missed it almost. So I'm like, oh, it must be delayed. So I zip to the front. I'm group one. And I'm like, I got it. You know, And I scan my thing and the woman like, says something to me, but I'm like, I know what she said. Because I've been through this. I didn't consolidate my bags, right. Like I have three. I'm supposed to have two. Cause I always do this. Like I have a fanny pack, purse, backpack. So usually I take the fanny pack, this is a trick. And I shove it to the back and I put my sweatshirt over it. And then you're two, right? But you're really three. And you're breaking federal law. But you feel like, sneaky. And it's the only time I ever feel like I have like a butt. Cause I have like a pretty flat ass. And if you ever are like, nikki Glaser's got a juicy, like, ass, it's on a jet bridge. We're on a jet bridge. If you've ever. Cause it's a fanny pack. I'm smuggling. But so this woman is like, you know, you know, says, ma'am, consolidate yourself. And I don't hear, but I'm like, I Know what's going on. So I go, yeah, yeah, yeah. I got. I'm so sorry. I know the rules. I know the rules. So I flick off my fanny pack. Everything goes flying. Like, it's half zip. So everyone's waiting, watching me. All I'm collecting AirPods, you know, credit cards, vape pens. So many tampons. Like, I don't know what I thought was happening that day. It looked like I was, like, collecting them for a women's shelter. Like, there were so many. I'm putting them back in. I get it all consolidated. And I go, are we good? You know? And she's just like, what? And then I run down the jet bridge just. Cause I'm, like, already holding things up. And then I feel a hand grab my shoulder. I'm like, what? And it's the gate agent. And she goes, ma'am, you're at the wrong gate.
Nikki Glaser
No.
Bozoma St. John
So these group of people have just watched this insane, manic woman run up. Just the gate agent politely says, ma'am, you're at the wrong gate. And I go, yeah, I know. I know the rules. Throws four to five tampons in the air. Like, kind of like. Like feminist ninja plow down the Runway.
Jimmy Fallon
You know what you're doing?
Bozoma St. John
And then I have to walk back out through the crowd of people that just were, like, watching and filming this. I mean, I'm sure there's evidence of this. It's on tmz and I miss my flight. And so, yeah, Nikki, don't change. Headphones work.
Jimmy Fallon
Don't change.
Bozoma St. John
Thank you so much.
Jimmy Fallon
Stay funny. You're the best. Nikki Glaze, everybody. Go see alive and unwell. Stand up door now through October. Randall park joins us after the race. Cigar out, everybody. Yeah.
Randall Park
Nine, five. I made the world take a face.
Jimmy Fallon
Our next guest is a funny and talented actor who stars in the new series the Residents, which is streaming now on Netflix. Everyone, please welcome Randall Park. Randall Parks, welcome to the show. Thanks for being here. You were telling me backstage that you were a big fan of the Roots.
Steve
I am a huge fan of the Roots. This is very. This is very special. They're like my Beatles. They are like, yeah, Black thought, top five all time. Yeah, yeah. I'm just.
Jimmy Fallon
I mean, always obsessed.
Steve
Ye.
Jimmy Fallon
You brought something that you said. Yeah.
Steve
Yes. So I used to go to all their shows in la. Whenever they'd show up in la, at ucla, at the old House of Blues, they perform there. And in 1995, they were performing at UCLA, and I saw this sitting on a table, and I Stole it. And it's an old promo photo.
Jimmy Fallon
Let me see.
Steve
For the album they were working on at the time. And at the end, at the end.
Jimmy Fallon
Of that, it's got tape marks on the back. Why?
Steve
Because I put it on my wall.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah, you hung this.
Steve
But at the time, after I sold it, I was like, I'm gonna get them to sign this the end of this show. And I never did. And then I'd bring it to other shows that I'd go to. I'm gonna get them to sign this at the end. If I could find them. I never did. So 30 years later I'm here and hopefully I'll be able to get them to sign this.
Jimmy Fallon
We'll make sure this happens.
Steve
That would be crazy.
Jimmy Fallon
But is it true that you were in a hip hop group at one point?
Steve
I was. I was.
Jimmy Fallon
Talk to me. Talk to us about this. We want to know about this.
Steve
Okay, well, there's a movie called Always Be My maybe that I did with Ali Wong.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Steve
And the band in that movie is based on the band that I was in. And it was. We were just out of college at ucla and again, we were obsessed with the Roots. So we had a full band. We had an upright bass player, just like the Roots did back in the day. And we'd perform all around LA and we got a little bit of a following. And what was the name of the group? We were called Il Again.
Jimmy Fallon
Il Again.
Steve
Well, originally we were Il Again's island and then we changed it to Il Again.
Jimmy Fallon
That's funny. Iligan's Island.
Steve
Yeah. And I had a rap name.
Jimmy Fallon
Ooh, what was the rap name?
Steve
My rap name was Randruff. It was Randruff. Cause at the time I had issues with dandruff. But also I would come off the top of the dome. You get it? Oh, oh, get it.
Jimmy Fallon
Ooh, Randruff. Yeah, here's a picture of Randruff right here.
Steve
Yeah, yeah, that was back in the day. Yes.
Jimmy Fallon
I don't know if you remember any of your lyrics, but. No, no, but we do have the Roots here. And we always have a microphone ready to go in case.
Steve
Oh, man.
Jimmy Fallon
All right.
Steve
If it's the Roots, it's the Roots. It's the Roots.
Jimmy Fallon
We give Randall a beat. Here we go.
Steve
All right, see, let's see if I remember this. Alright, I'm gonna stand up. Hello. My name is Randall Enemies. I strangle, kick him in the butt with the foot up to the ankle Next day, get an X ray there's my sandal Panhandling rappers get Mashed and manhandle? Similar to Rambo and camo? Grammar is my ammo? Blast at you simpletons and randos? Holes in your Pendletons and Kango? I'm a Gallagher? Your melons and your mangoes? Put your band of banjos up against Django Reinhart? My preamble will leave you in shambles? Eyes sharp on my foes? Cut off my earlobe? That's how they know that they're battling Van Gogh? The combo of me and black thought in a Lambo? Pull up to your campsite? Handing out samples of raps? So fire A squad of commandos couldn't handle this, Granddad. Tabasco.
Jimmy Fallon
Random Park.
Steve
Oh, my God.
Jimmy Fallon
AKA Randrum. Thank you. Thank you. The return of Randrum.
Steve
Oh, my God. That was a dream come true.
Jimmy Fallon
Ah, I'm happy to see those things happen, bud. That's crazy. That's so fun that that happened. Let's talk about your new series, the Residents.
Steve
Yes.
Jimmy Fallon
Congrats. Can you tell everyone.
Steve
Thank you.
Jimmy Fallon
Tell everyone about the show and who you play, please.
Steve
All right, so it's an upstairs, downstair screwball murder mystery set in the east wing of the White House.
Jimmy Fallon
Fantastic.
Steve
And it's starring the great Uzo Aduba. She's great as the greatest detective, Cordelia Cuff. And I play Edwin park, who's basically the Watson to her Sherlock.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah, is this. And who's behind this?
Steve
Shondaland.
Jimmy Fallon
This is Shonda Rhimes.
Steve
Shonda Rhimes. Yep.
Jimmy Fallon
Randall park, everyone. The Residence is streaming now on Netflix. More Tonight show after the break. Stick around, everybody.
Randall Park
I'm in the iron storm where the pressure's on MCs are dressed funny like a leprechaun Imma chop them up like chicken Session warm? Probably sell them off like we at an archon. You know my zodiac sign. Be caution.
Jimmy Fallon
Our next. Our next guest is a very successful entrepreneur, author, and marketing executive. She also stars on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, which airs its season finale tomorrow at 8pm on Bravo and streams the next day on Peacock. Please welcome Bozma St. John. Bozma, welcome to the show.
Nikki Glaser
Thank you.
Jimmy Fallon
You look gorgeous.
Nikki Glaser
I know.
Jimmy Fallon
I am a fan of yours. You are a marketing genius, by the way.
Nikki Glaser
Yes, that's also correct.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah. For anyone not familiar with your career prior to the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, can I just go through some things that you've done? You were chief marketing officer at Netflix. You were. Oh, get ready. You were chief brand officer at Uber. You were the head of global marketing at Beats by Dre Apple music and itunes. Yeah. You were the head of music and entertainment marketing at Pepsi and did super bowl halftime shows like Beyonce, Bruno Mars, et cetera. You were named Billboard's Female Executive of the Year, and you were inducted into the American Marketing hall of Fame. Come on now. Come on now. That's how you do it. That is unbelievable. What a resume.
Nikki Glaser
Thank you, thank you, thank you. And I did it all in heels. Thank you.
Jimmy Fallon
Yes. And so when you're doing these marketing ideas for these companies, where do your ideas come from?
Nikki Glaser
Well, okay, so here's the thing. I am very intuitive. You know, my big ideas come in all sorts of places. You know, I like watching people. I like reading all kind of stuff. I mean, I think pretty much like you. It's like the ideas just. They come sometimes from strange places. You know, I could be sleeping, wake up, I'm like, oh, my God. You know, like, for instance, a year ago or almost a year ago, I launched a new company, A hair and beauty company. Yes, Right. And so I'm talking. Oh, yeah, exactly. Beauty and hair. Yes. Fabulous. Thank you. And so I was talking to the woman who runs pr, and she's like, you know, what do you want to do to anniversary? It's. And I have really big ideas. Right? So, like, for instance, when I launched the company, I launched it at the top of the Empire State Building. Cause I was like, I'm launching an empire. You know what I mean?
Jimmy Fallon
Yes.
Nikki Glaser
So I need to make it feel like something. And so she's like, well, what are you gonna do to top that? And I was like, I wanna put a wig on the Statue of Liberty. You know what I'm saying?
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
Like, I don't know if that is in code. I don't know if it's gonna, like, suffocate Staten Island. I'm not quite sure what's gonna happen, but I want a wig on the Statue of Liberty.
Jimmy Fallon
Wait, are you. Are you going to do it?
Nikki Glaser
I am going to try my hardest.
Jimmy Fallon
That's the only way to top.
Bozoma St. John
That's the only way.
Nikki Glaser
That's the only way to stop, like, top, damp, slave, own. Because what else am I gonna do, you know? And it's such a good idea. I mean, it's a good idea.
Jimmy Fallon
It's a fantastic idea.
Nikki Glaser
Yeah, exactly.
Jimmy Fallon
And give the Statue of Liberty some love, Tanner.
Bozoma St. John
Me, too.
Nikki Glaser
Nobody's seen a Beyonce fan. Like, you know what's gonna happen?
Jimmy Fallon
A giant Beyonce fan at the Statue of Liberty.
Nikki Glaser
That's correct. Trash is just blowing.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
It'll be beautiful.
Jimmy Fallon
But when you have this career and you worked with everybody, I know a little bit about you and I know that you started like everyone. Temp job. Temp job.
Nikki Glaser
Yeah.
Jimmy Fallon
And then you get a call from Spike Lee. Yes. That they're like, hey, his assistant just left. He needs one today.
Nikki Glaser
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it was really crazy because I ended up in New York. Cause I was taking a year between what I thought was going to be my medical career and, you know, what was gonna be out in the big bad world. And when I did, why New York? Because I was young and dumb and New York sounded fun.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Sounded a good time. It's a great city. It's the best city.
Nikki Glaser
And I came from Colorado Springs, Colorado, so it was a far place from home.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
And I was like, I'm gonna make my way in the big city, you know, and I was temping and. Yeah. I got the call that said Spike had fired his assistant and that they needed somebody to answer the phone. And so I went in there, you know, day one, bright eyed, bushy tailed, ready to answer the phone like a champion.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
And he was walking in or he was walking by and he was carrying a script under his arm. And the thing is, I was also very. I was a know it all, you know, somebody who just thought she was so brilliant. You know what I mean?
Jimmy Fallon
What? You are. I am.
Nikki Glaser
Thank you.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah, you are.
Bozoma St. John
Thank you for.
Nikki Glaser
Thank you. And because. Because alongside my pre med courses in college, I also took African American history and literature. When I saw that he was writing something, I was like, ooh, I wanna read it. You know, maybe I can give him some notes. And so. I know, I know. And so I asked if I could read his script.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
And then I took like an actual red pen to it and I. Yeah. And I made Spikely.
Bozoma St. John
Yeah, Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
I made notes to diction, character development, like all kinds of stuff. He'll tell you the story now. Like, it was so outrageous. And did he flip out or was.
Jimmy Fallon
He like, who are you?
Nikki Glaser
Well, everyone in the office didn't breathe, you know, as he took the notes back to his office. And I was sitting there with my purse in my lap, like, oh my God, I'm getting fired today. You know?
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
And he came out and he was like, you know what? You made some good notes. You should stick around.
Jimmy Fallon
No way.
Nikki Glaser
Yeah.
Jimmy Fallon
And that's coming from Spike Lee. Who's the best? That was my first show.
Nikki Glaser
And you know what's even, what's so amazing about that is that, of course, like, you know, all these years later, we're still friends. 25 years later. Still friends. And when I was getting inducted into the marketing hall of Fame, he did one of the intro videos, you know, and he said that he knew on day one that one day he would be working for me. And it so happened that when I was the CMO of Netflix, we also gave him an overall deal. So it kind of came true.
Bozoma St. John
You know what I mean?
Jimmy Fallon
Isn't that fantastic?
Nikki Glaser
Amazing. Amazing.
Jimmy Fallon
So how do you. How do you end up on the Real Housewives? And what, like, what made you think, like, oh, that's my next move?
Nikki Glaser
You know, I don't know that I have a, you know, linear answer to that. Because everything that I've done in my career, it's like people look at it and, you know, read off a resume and it sounds so strategic. Like, oh, you did this and you did that and you did that. But that's not really how my decisions are made. Like, it really is intuition. Like, I have been in many rooms in which I've disrupted the space, you know, one because I'm black, one because I'm a woman, and also because I have really brilliant ideas, you know, but it doesn't. Thank you. Yeah. And it doesn't. I've never been intimidated by spaces that maybe other people didn't think I should be in.
Jimmy Fallon
Yeah.
Nikki Glaser
And reality TV is one of them. I'm like, I'm here to disrupt it.
Jimmy Fallon
Let's do it. Yeah. Yeah. And you're a fan tape. Everyone loves you.
Bozoma St. John
You.
Jimmy Fallon
Yes. Everyone loves you. You're a fan fave.
Nikki Glaser
I'm a girl's girl.
Jimmy Fallon
You are fantastic. They need you. It's perfect. Bozma St. John, everybody. The season finale of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs tomorrow at 8pm on Bravo and streams the next day on Peacock. Stick around, everybody.
Randall Park
We give the heart the beats and smarter raps and special sound. The road's long enough to be considered a cab thought please rim sharp enough to be considered a crown. When the fake come, take some Pass it around. It's the red hot hip hop.
Jimmy Fallon
My thanks to Nikki Glaser, Randall Park, Bozeman St. John and the Roots right there from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Good night, everybody. Bye Bye. Do it. Do it. Thanks for listening to the Tonight show starring Jenny Fallon. Don't forget to subscribe to get the latest episodes weekday mornings. Wherever you get your podcasts, watch the Tonight show starring Jimmy Fallon weeknights on NBC and streaming on Peacock.
Podcast Summary: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon – "Trump Throws Massive Tantrum Over Unflattering Portrait | Nikki Glaser, Randall Park, Bozoma Saint John" | March 25, 2025
The Tonight Show continues its legacy as the longest-running talk show on television with an engaging episode featuring a blend of humor, insightful interviews, and entertaining segments. Hosted by Jimmy Fallon, this episode delves into current events, celebrity antics, and personal anecdotes from guests Nikki Glaser, Randall Park, and Bozoma St. John. Here's a detailed breakdown of the episode's key moments and discussions.
Jimmy Fallon kicks off the show from Studio 6P at Rockefeller Center, delivering his characteristic blend of humor and sharp commentary on recent news:
White House Sponsorship for Easter Egg Roll: Fallon jokes about the government's need for sponsors, quipping, “It's like me undies” ([00:30]).
Trump's Packed Schedule: Highlighting former President Trump's hectic itinerary, Fallon humorously lists his activities, culminating in a satirical rundown:
“Friday, briefing. Saturday, wrestler. Sunday, briefing. Monday, buy a Tesla...” ([02:00])
Jeff Bezos' Wedding Plans: Fallon teases the logistical challenges of Bezos' wedding, referencing his partnership with Amazon for a cake delivered in “38 separate boxes” ([03:00]).
23andMe Bankruptcy Joke: Making light of corporate struggles, Fallon delivers a pun:
“The worst news to hit the DNA testing business since Maury was canceled.” ([03:10])
Disney World Ride Incident: A humorous take on a fire at a new Disney World ride, with Fallon sarcastically promoting souvenir photos:
“For $30, you could buy a picture of you and your family escaping the towering inferno.” ([04:50])
Spring Break Advice: Initiates a humorous "Do's and Don'ts" segment on spring break, featuring Bozoma St. John’s comedic interjections:
“Don’t catch some crabs.” ([05:22])
Mid-morning chaos ensues when Bozoma St. John unexpectedly appears on stage:
Bozoma’s Mishap: Confusion arises as Bozoma exits through a stage door, humorously admitting she was searching for a place to vape ([05:22]-[05:45]).
Spring Break Segment with Bozoma: The trio comically navigates the "Do's and Don'ts" of spring break, with Bozoma adding witty remarks and timing jokes:
“Don’t go to brunch. Bottomless.” ([06:15])
Satirical Advice Exchange: Bozoma and Jimmy exchange exaggerated tips, blending humor with faux-serious guidance on enjoying spring break responsibly ([07:25]-[07:45]).
Randall Park takes the stage with a lively rap segment, infusing energy into the show:
Rooftop Performance: Randall entertains the audience with playful lyrics, showcasing his versatility and humor:
“Let’s have it, Mr. Omasses. Drop top rips...” ([07:57])
Audience Engagement: The performance is met with enthusiastic applause, highlighting Park’s charisma and stage presence.
Jimmy engages the audience with a humorous take on polling, blending real data with comedic exaggerations:
Tax Filing Poll: A mock poll reveals:
“60% said by copy pasting everything from last year and praying no one notices.” ([09:20])
Flirting with Jimmy: A playful poll question results in:
“80% said, what? No.” ([10:35])
Pizza vs. Sushi Debate: A near-even split fuels lighthearted banter:
“49% said sushi. 50% said pizza.” ([11:00])
Final Poll Insights: Jimmy wraps up with quirky results, maintaining the segment's humorous tone ([12:00]).
Nikki Glaser, a renowned comedian, shares insights from her "Alive and Unwell" stand-up tour:
Stand-Up Tour Highlights: Nikki discusses her extensive tour schedule across the U.S., Canada, and Australia, emphasizing the challenges and joys of performing live ([13:00]).
Personal Stories: She recounts a chaotic airport experience involving tampons flying everywhere, blending humor with relatable frustrations:
“Throws four to five tampons in the air.” ([21:27])
Career Beginnings: Nikki narrates her unconventional path to success, including her spontaneous interaction with Spike Lee that led to a lasting friendship:
“When I was the CMO of Netflix, we also gave him an overall deal. So it kind of came true.” ([34:19])
Candid Discussions: She delves into topics like body image, the stigma around cosmetic procedures, and her intuitive approach to marketing and career decisions ([15:00]-[35:00]).
Notable Quote:
“I just feel like I'll just do it, you know, why not?” – Bozoma St. John on embracing cosmetic procedures ([16:07])
Randall Park discusses his multifaceted career and his new Netflix series, "The Residence":
Early Career and Musical Pursuits: Randall reminisces about his time in a hip hop group inspired by The Roots, performing around LA as "Il Again":
“My rap name was Randruff.” ([25:07])
Creative Performances: He delivers a freestyle rap, humorously blending his past with present endeavors:
“I'm a Gallagher? Your melons and your mangoes?” ([26:57])
Netflix Series "The Residence": Randall elaborates on his role in the murder mystery set in the White House, highlighting his collaboration with Shonda Rhimes and co-star Uzo Aduba:
“It's an upstairs, downstair screwball murder mystery set in the east wing of the White House.” ([27:23])
Passion for Music: Expresses his admiration for The Roots, likening them to his personal "Beatles" and sharing anecdotes about their influence on his career ([22:12]-[23:34]).
Notable Quote:
“If it's the Roots, it's the Roots. We give Randall a beat.” – Jimmy Fallon introducing Randall's performance ([25:46])
Bozoma St. John transitions from her impressive marketing career to her role on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills":
Career Achievements: Jimmy highlights Bozoma’s stellar resume, including roles at Netflix, Uber, Beats by Dre, and Pepsi. Bozoma humorously credits her high heels for her accomplishments:
“I did it all in heels.” ([29:53])
Creative Marketing Strategies: She shares her intuitive approach to marketing, citing her ambitious idea to place a wig on the Statue of Liberty as a metaphor for her brand-building strategies:
“I wanna put a wig on the Statue of Liberty.” ([31:11])
Transition to Reality TV: Bozoma explains her decision to join the Real Housewives, aiming to disrupt the genre with her dynamic presence:
“Reality TV is one of them. I'm here to disrupt it.” ([35:05])
Personal Insights: She touches on overcoming challenges as a Black woman in the corporate world and embracing her role on reality TV as a platform for furthering her influence ([34:26]-[35:17]).
Notable Quote:
“I love it. I'm like, do it, do it. I have no judgment.” – Bozoma St. John on embracing cosmetic treatments like Ozempic ([17:24])
Jimmy Fallon wraps up the episode by thanking his guests—Nikki Glaser, Randall Park, and Bozoma St. John—and encourages the audience to watch the season finale of "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills." He also promotes upcoming episodes and the show's availability on various platforms.
Conclusion
This episode of The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon masterfully blends humor with meaningful conversations, offering viewers both laughter and insight. From satirical news commentary to in-depth interviews with multifaceted guests, Fallon ensures a captivating experience. Notable moments include Bozoma St. John's candid spring break tips, Nikki Glaser's hilarious airport mishap story, and Randall Park's nostalgic reflections on his musical roots. The episode underscores the show's enduring appeal, balancing entertainment with genuine engagement.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps:
Jimmy Fallon ([00:30]): “It's like me undies.”
Bozoma St. John ([05:26]): “Don’t use plenty of baby oil. Diddy ruined that for everyone.”
Nikki Glaser ([21:27]): “Throws four to five tampons in the air.”
Bozoma St. John ([16:07]): “I just feel like I'll just do it, you know, why not?”
Jimmy Fallon ([25:46]): “If it's the Roots, it's the Roots. We give Randall a beat.”
Bozoma St. John ([17:24]): “I have no judgment.”
This comprehensive summary encapsulates the essence of the episode, highlighting key discussions, humorous exchanges, and the vibrant personalities of the guests. Whether you're catching up on the latest episode or deciding whether to tune in, this overview provides a thorough glimpse into what makes The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon a standout in late-night television.