71: The Wayback #71 | Kim Congdon

Summary

Detailed Summary: The Wayback #71 | Kim Congdon

Podcast Information:
Title: The Wayback with Ryan Sickler
Host: Ryan Sickler
Guest: Kim Congdon
Episode: 71
Release Date: May 8, 2025
Description: Ryan Sickler and his guests take a seat in “The Wayback” for a nostalgic, wild ride filled with laughter, fond memories, and a touch of wistful reflection. Buckle up.

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Introduction: Welcoming Kim Congdon

In the 71st episode of The Wayback with Ryan Sickler, host Ryan Sickler kicks off the conversation by expressing heartfelt gratitude to his audience for their continuous support. He enthusiastically introduces his guest, Kim Congdon, setting the stage for an engaging and nostalgic dialogue.

Ryan Sickler ([00:32]): “Thank you for real for supporting anything that I do. I don’t care what it is.”

Kim joins Ryan, bringing her unique experiences and stories to the table, promising listeners a memorable episode filled with personal anecdotes and reflections.

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Haunted Beginnings in St. Augustine

Kim Congdon delves into her unconventional childhood, sharing that she was born and raised in a haunted house in St. Augustine, Florida. She recounts eerie family stories and the supernatural atmosphere that surrounded her early years.

Kim Congdon ([03:17]): “We lived in a haunted house when you were born.”

Kim describes how her parents resided in the guest house of one of the most haunted residences in St. Augustine. Although she was just a baby and had no direct experiences with the hauntings, family photographs reveal ghostly figures, sparking her lifelong fascination with the paranormal.

Haunted House Stories:

• Kim shares tales of ghostly apparitions, including white figures appearing in her baby photos.
• Her mother recounted haunting incidents, such as piano-related witchcraft attempts to revive a deceased daughter’s body.
• The house was a hotspot for paranormal investigations, once almost turning into a movie titled The House.

Kim Congdon ([04:24]): “She left me in the arms of these people... trying to revive her body with witchcraft.”

These stories paint a vivid picture of Kim’s eerie upbringing, blending family lore with supernatural elements.

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Childhood Games and Early Mischief

As the conversation shifts to childhood, Kim reminisces about the imaginative and sometimes wild games she played with her sister, inspired by the wild antics of shows like Jerry Springer.

Kim Congdon ([08:26]): “We caught dad cheating or I was taking my sister away, like, I’m taking my kid.”

These games were not only a form of entertainment but also a way for Kim and her sister to cope with and escape from the tumultuous environment at home. The playful yet dramatic scenarios reflect their creativity and resilience as children.

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Navigating Chat Rooms and Teenage Challenges

Kim opens up about her teenage years, particularly her experiences in online chat rooms. At a young age, she and her friend Rachel engaged with older men, a situation fraught with discomfort and potential danger.

Kim Congdon ([09:57]): “Perverts are relentless. You can roast them, you can make them feel shitty. And they’re relentless. They’re insatiable, truly.”

Kim and Rachel employed humor and sharp wit to deal with inappropriate advances, showcasing their solidarity and strength in navigating these challenging interactions. This period highlights Kim’s early encounters with online safety and the importance of friendship in overcoming adversity.

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Family Dynamics and Embarrassing Punishments

Kim candidly discusses her relationship with her mother, whose disciplinary methods were often public and humiliating. These experiences have had a lasting impact on Kim’s views on relationships and conflict resolution.

Kim Congdon ([21:14]): “When I got my period, she called everyone in our family and made it so obvious at dinner.”

Her mother’s tactics included:

• Publicly shaming her by exposing personal matters.
• Dropping Kim’s clothes at school or work, forcing her to retrieve them in front of peers.
• Using embarrassment as a punishment for typical adolescent behavior.

These harsh disciplinary measures contributed to Kim’s reluctance to engage in public confrontations and her preference for resolving conflicts privately.

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Struggles with School and Summer Classes

Academically, Kim faced fluctuating performance levels, often attending summer school as a result of poor grades. Her lack of academic focus was partly due to minimal parental pressure, contrasting with her sister’s more disciplined approach.

Kim Congdon ([23:00]): “Summer school was kind of fun. All the bad kids went and they sold good snacks.”

Summer school provided Kim with:

• A social outlet among peers facing similar academic challenges.
• Opportunities to enjoy simple pleasures like snacks, making the experience more bearable.
• A sporadic academic record, with her only straight-A year occurring when motivated by a peer, and a subsequent return to failing grades.

This inconsistency in her academic life underscores the impact of her home environment on her educational pursuits.

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Family Karaoke Parties and Musical Influence

Kim fondly recalls her family’s love for karaoke parties, a significant part of their social life. These gatherings were not only fun but also a reflection of her parents' personalities and interests.

Kim Congdon ([26:37]): “She was in a cover band now.”

Key aspects of these karaoke parties included:

• Her mother’s favorite song was “Zombie” by The Cranberries.
• Her stepdad was actively involved in a cover band named The Comeback Kid.
• These musical endeavors fostered a lively and creative family atmosphere, despite underlying tensions.

Through these shared musical experiences, Kim developed a deep appreciation for music and performance, traits that continue to influence her life today.

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Favorite Toys and Nostalgic Games

Reflecting on her childhood, Kim mentions some of her favorite toys and games that brought joy and creativity into her life.

Kim Congdon ([30:02]): “Dream Phone... it's a board game.”

Dream Phone:

• A popular board game where players call out to match with their “dream guy”.
• Involved playful interaction and a bit of teenage flirtation, encapsulating the innocent crushes of adolescence.

90s Projector and Flashlight Set:

• A nostalgic favorite that allowed Kim and her friends to create ghostly images on walls.
• Included a projector, flashlight, and a light pen for drawing, sparking endless hours of imaginative play.
• They often used it to create humorous and inappropriate drawings, adding a mischievous twist to their fun.

Kim Congdon ([31:10]): “We make inappropriate pictures... it was one of our favorites.”

These toys represent Kim’s creative spirit and the inventive ways she and her friends entertained themselves during their youth.

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Conclusion and Promotions

As the episode winds down, Kim takes the opportunity to promote her various projects, ensuring listeners know where to find more of her work.

Kim Congdon ([32:03]): “Check out KimCongden.com, Childless Milf on YouTube, Magic Prank Show on Netflix, this podcast with Sarah Weinshank, The Kim Congdon Takeover, all out wherever you find podcasts.”

Ryan wraps up by expressing his appreciation for Kim’s openness and the joy she brought to the conversation.

Ryan Sickler ([31:54]): “You’re one of my favorites, and I love you. Thank you for doing. This is a lot of fun.”

---

Notable Quotes

• Ryan Sickler ([00:32]): “Thank you for real for supporting anything that I do. I don’t care what it is.”
• Kim Congdon ([03:17]): “We lived in a haunted house when you were born.”
• Kim Congdon ([08:35]): “Jerry Springer at five is wild.”
• Kim Congdon ([09:57]): “Perverts are relentless. You can roast them, you can make them feel shitty. And they’re relentless. They’re insatiable, truly.”
• Kim Congdon ([21:14]): “When I got my period, she called everyone in our family and made it so obvious at dinner.”
• Kim Congdon ([30:02]): “Dream Phone... it's a board game.”
• Ryan Sickler ([31:54]): “You’re one of my favorites, and I love you. Thank you for doing. This is a lot of fun.”

---

Overall Impression

Episode 71 of The Wayback with Ryan Sickler provides a captivating glimpse into Kim Congdon’s life, blending eerie childhood memories with humorous and challenging teenage experiences. The heartfelt and candid conversation highlights the complexities of family dynamics, the resilience developed through early adversities, and the nostalgic joys of youthful creativity. For listeners seeking an engaging and heartfelt narrative, this episode delivers a rich tapestry of memories and lessons learned.

Transcript

[A]

Baltimore, I'm coming home. We're gonna wrap the Live and alive tour up Saturday, June 28, at the Horseshoe Casino. It's gonna be a great night. I got Justin Schlegel from 98 Rock gonna be out there with me. We're gonna have some surprises. It's gonna be a really big deal. Get your tickets [e-mail].

[B]

Hey, baby, we gonna be here all day.

[A]

We're gonna be here all day, baby.

[B]

I like this.

[A]

Back to the way back, everybody, I'm Ryan Sickler. I want to start this episode like I start them all by saying thank you very much. Thank you for real for supporting anything that I do. I don't care what it is. Telling someone about the shows, you know, sharing it, following a shirt. I don't care coming to see me, like, whatever it is. Thank you very much. It is much appreciated over here. All right, make sure you check out the new tier on Patreon. We we've got the way back a day early now. It's ad free, sensor free, and exclusive bonus content on that tier. You're not getting anywhere else. All right, that's it, man. I'm very excited to introduce today's guest sitting back here with me, Ladies and gentlemen, been waiting for this one. Please welcome Kid Kong then, everybody.

[B]

Oh, wow. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, guys. Thank you. I'm gonna crowd surf.

[A]

You could do it.

[B]

Good.

[A]

These people.

[B]

I can't. No, I can't. Dude, they're hot. We should get them some water.

[A]

They look parched over there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Before we get going to the way back with you, please promote everything you'd like.

[B]

Yeah. You guys, thank you so much for watching KimCongden.com for show dates, you could check out my special Childless Milf on YouTube. My podcast, this with Sarah Wein Shank and the Kim Con takeover. All out wherever you find podcasts. And check out magic prank show on Netflix.

[A]

All right. I. I showed my daughter the magic prank show.

[B]

Oh, did she like it?

[A]

She does. She went to the magic castle. Sin she likes it.

[B]

That's fun.

[A]

She's coming home. Showing me little, like, sleight of hand. So now I'm trying to learn quick ones on the Internet so I can.

[B]

Just, like, watch this and show out. Yeah, you have to. You have to.

[A]

You're someone who I've been wanting to do this podcast with because I know that you're a Florida girl and you definitely have a different upbring. So first of all, where. Where are you growing up? In Florida.

[B]

Okay, so I grew up. I was. Well, I was born in St. Augustine.

[A]

St. Augustine.

[B]

In a haunted house. What do you mean, in a haunted house?

[A]

Your house was actually haunted?

[B]

Well, yeah. When I was born, my parents lived in a guest house of a haunted h. The. One of the most haunted houses in St. Augustine. They.

[A]

Hold on. Do you have the address?

[B]

No, but they almost made a movie about it called the House.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. This.

[A]

What do you mean they almost made.

[B]

I don't know. When I was younger, they were like, they're making a movie about it, and you know how show business goes, bro.

[A]

I also know a lot of people, like, thinking about making this movie. You know, it just gets around. Like, they were thinking about making.

[B]

No, they had people coming in, filming, and I don't know what happened.

[A]

All right, so what kind of. Maybe something going on in that house? Did you ever. Were you old enough at the time, still living there for you to personally experience anything?

[B]

No, I was a. I was a baby, Baby, baby. But I have pictures of, like, me at this. I was looking through my baby book, and I'm. And I see these pictures. I see my grandparents holding me. I'm like, so cute. So cute. And then I flip, and it's just this weird house. I'm like, that's kind of a scary house. And then there's. And then I flip again, and it's like two white people that look like ghosts, like, standing straight up in this house. And then that.

[A]

You don't know?

[B]

No, that I don't know. And I've never seen before. And then I flip again, and the white people are holding me, and I go, who are these people holding me? My mom was like, we lived in a haunted house when you were born, and those were the owners of the house, and they would watch you. They loved you. I was like, you would leave me alone with these people, and it's just me in a haunted house in front of, like, a. And she was like. And then my mom would be like, yeah, you know that piano? A woman's daughter died, and she kept her body on that piano for 14 days, trying to revive her body with witchcraft. And I was like, you left me. You left me in the arms of these people.

[A]

They were also unsuccessful.

[B]

You left me in the arms and in the arms.

[A]

What other stories have you. Did they have any other.

[B]

Yeah, I remember because we would go. My mom. So we would go visit, and my mom.

[A]

What do you mean? You'd go back to it to check it out?

[B]

Yeah, my mom would be like, let's go see the haunted house we lived in when I was. And my mom said, okay. My mom said that the lady that lived there was, like, a really old lady. Like, she was pretty old. And. And she. Her mom was alive at one point, was really old. And she said when she was living. Living in the guest house one night she was. She was up with me, like, breastfeeding or something hot. And. And she heard something at the door. The power went out, and she started hearing all these weird noises. And she goes up and opens the front door, and there's this old woman with, like, stringy hair, like, at the door. She was like. Like a movie. Like the lightning was flashing behind her. And it was just the lady's mom, so it was already a creepy family. And we would go and visit, and then the lady would tell stories that, like, her husband got pushed down the stairs by a ghost. And the doors would open it. The sliding glass doors would open and close by themselves and slam. And. Yeah, and there was a woman whose daughter died, and she tried to revive her on the piano. And there was a albino boy that was born at one point in that.

[A]

House or got the color scared out of here. You know what I mean?

[B]

These are all the stories they told me. And. And then they kept albino boy in the attic. They let him starve. And the neighbors would see him getting, like, withering away in the attic. Like, he. There'd be a window. There's a window in the attic in the house. There's tombstones in the yard, on the property, on the. Of the kids that died.

[A]

That. Kim, that's crazy.

[B]

And the pictures of me are just in this woman's arms. She's in, like, you know those things that look like napkins on tables? She got that around her neck. She's got a Doyle. The bitch had a Doyle. The bitch had a Doyle on her neck. Like, you can't leave your Puerto Rican daughter with a white woman with a Doyle on her neck. You can't. You can't.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

No, you can't.

[A]

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[B]

Yeah, so that was my first few months of living.

[A]

Yeah, man. All right, so you guys get out of there.

[B]

Yeah. Now we're living in this rogue. What are those, like, square hippie vans?

[A]

Volkswagen.

[B]

Yeah, those vans. An orange one.

[A]

VW van.

[B]

Yeah. And I'm picking this all up from pictures.

[A]

Tell me about. We were talking before we started. We were asking you about, like, we love to hear games. Kids would make up. Like, shit you don't find anywhere else. It's not like we all played Monopoly or whatever, like, the stuff you make up and create. And you said, I didn't have a.

[B]

Very strict mom, so I would. I was watching, like, Jerry Springer young and stuff.

[A]

How old are you watching Jerry?

[B]

I remember at one point when I was in kindergarten, my mom. My mom turning to me during Jerry Springer and going, do you know what humping means? Because they were saying something about humping.

[A]

They said a lot of wild on Jerry's.

[B]

And I went, yeah, like, with attitude. And she was like, what? And I was like, I don't know. And I thought I did. And I was right about what I thought, but I knew it was inappropriate, so I was like, never mind, bitch. I don't want to talk about it.

[A]

Jerry Springer and. And at five is wild.

[B]

Jerry Springer at five is wild. So I would play, like, crazy games with my sister. Like, we would play like, we caught dad cheating or like, I'm the wife. I caught my dad cheating, and I'm taking my sister from. Like, I'm taking my kid. Yeah. We also had a lot of domestic dispute going. We had a lot of domestic stuff.

[A]

Let's play. We catch that cheating. And I'm taking my child.

[B]

Yeah, Jeff, I don't care. I'd use my dad's name. She's mine. We do that. We also played this is the. This is. When I was a teenager, I would get. Me and my friend Rachel would get into chat rooms. When chat room started oh man, we were, we were not the kids to have in a chat room. We'd get in there, we'd start talking to men, we'd ask them their age, they'd say 41, 42.

[A]

And you're how old?

[B]

Like 15, I think at this point, like if I'm thinking about it, I remember being like 14, 14, 13, 14.

[A]

Just.

[B]

And we're writing back like, we're 13.

[A]

Oh, you are being.

[B]

We're not lying. We're not lying.

[A]

Okay. I'm thinking you're telling them you're 20 or whatever.

[B]

No, we're like, we're 13 year old girls. And like I'm. My friend would be like, I'm 13, I live here. You know, whatever, you're 40. And she'd literally write back like, but you're old. Like, we would be mean and we'd be cracking up. She'd be like, but you're old. Lol, you know, or whatever. And we'd be like, like it was a roast battle. And the guys wouldn't care. Like, you know, perverts are relentless and they would like keep talking. And at one point, perverts are relentless. You can't really get rid of them. You can roast them, you can make them feel shitty. And they're relentless. They're insatiable, truly. And, and, and at one point she was like, let's start with them more. She was really funny and, and she was kind of like bad. She was my bad friend. And she. So she started telling them to meet us at this park that was like in walkable distance, probably like a 10 minute walk from her house. And, and then we'd walk like close to the park but far away, like, and just enough to where we could see what's going on.

[A]

And you would see these grown ass men show up looking for these children.

[B]

Kind of like silently roast them next to each other. Like, look at this fat pig. This fat loser pig. And then we'd like all your org. And my friend was bad. She'd be like, look at this fat loser pig. And she'd put out like the cigarette that she stole from her mom. And she'd be like, let's go, we have to sneak out later. And I'd be like, are you sure? Like, I was kind of like the friend that was like, I don't know if we should sneak out. She's like, come on, Kim, don't be a loser.

[A]

So, all right, tell me about sneaking out. Where are you going? You staying over at her place?

[B]

That's the Only place I could sneak out.

[A]

Why? What was her parents deal?

[B]

The alcoholics, not her mom liked a little drinky drink. Yeah, she would knock out early. She would knock out early for sure. Yeah.

[A]

So did you really have to sneak out or could you just go right out?

[B]

We went through windows.

[A]

Oh, you did?

[B]

Okay. Yeah, through the window fully. And we. There was another girl who, whose grandma had custody of her. And that's when you know it's about to be fun.

[A]

Yeah. Hell yeah.

[B]

Her grandma would be waiting. We'd sneak out and there'd just be this old van out front. And this old woman, she's like, grandma, open the door for them. She's like this poor abused old woman that's like had to take custody of her crackhead daughter's child. And she's like doing bad things to help her granddaughter. Like you could tell she's a messed up family, you know what I mean? So they, her grandma picks us up and they wait, you're sneaking out?

[A]

Oh, I'm thinking you're going to the lady's house. She's driving you this grandma's drive.

[B]

Yes. And she takes us to these boys house.

[A]

This is crazy.

[B]

It's like, it's like midnight. She drops us off at these boys house and my friend's like, kim, we're gonna smoke weed tonight. And I've never smoked weed before. I'm specifically 13 at this age. I remember being 13. We sneak out, this girl's grandma picks up two 13 year old girls at midnight were in the car. She's like, grandma, make a left here and then come pick us up at you know, 1:30. And she like slammed the door and the grandma just drove off and. Wild. Wild. So the three of us get out of the car.

[A]

No wonder that lady's daughter's dead, dude.

[B]

Crazy, crazy. History repeats itself.

[A]

For real. No wonder she's dead.

[B]

So.

[A]

Oh man. Okay, go ahead. Sorry. So we go, you're gonna smoke weed tonight.

[B]

Oh, and in the, in the van, the boys lived so close. Like literally the drive was. We could have walked there. It was, it was like a six minute drive. And in the car there's bottles of Bacardi that like the girl brought for us a pre game with grandma's van. Grandma's van were pre gaming some alcohol.

[A]

That is crazy.

[B]

We're drinking some.

[A]

Do you ever look back at this now?

[B]

I'm like, Jesus, I've actually never retold this specific part of the story. And I'm kind of like, yeah, that's pretty shocking.

[A]

There's a grandmom that's taking children.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

To boys houses. She doesn't probably even know.

[B]

13 when I was 13.

[A]

I hear you drinking. Her daughter's dead because of this. Probably.

[B]

Probably.

[A]

And you're going over now to smoke weed.

[B]

Yeah. And we're gonna go smoke weed for the first time. So we're having a few drinks and my friend, My friend Rachel, she's. She chugs, she's chugging. Her mom knocks out early. She. She's the apple don't fall far from the tree, you know. And then so she's chugging, I'm drinking, and we get to this. The grandma drops us off, we go to the door. These guys open the door immediately. I'm like, these guys are way older than us. We get to this house. I don't know whose house this is. This is some guy that my friend Rachel met that she had a crush on. I think she may have met him at a mall or something. And he ended up living close or something weird like that. And we show up and I'm like, oh, dude, this guy's way older. It's like two guys answer the door, but there's three of us. So I'm like, okay, this is fine. We're 13. They're probably close to being juniors or seniors in high school. So it's like. Yeah, it's a whole. But my friend Rachel's 13 with like fat titties. So she's really like 16. So fat, young titties, give you three years. And, and, and she smokes cigarettes and she drinks, so she seems like older. And I'm very clearly 13. I'm like, have no boobs. I haven't started my period yet. But I'm lying about it. Like, I'm like, I'm like lying about it. Yeah, I'm like, very right. And I don't sneak out. My mom instills nothing but anxiety in me and fear and I'm terrified to do everything and I'm about to smoke. So we go into this house. This house is like a hoarder's house. It's like, there's just like boxes and everywhere and, and there's just like a kind of like a trail leading to a room. So we're like going into this room, we open the door, it goes from two like 16 or 17 year old guys to like five. And they're all like, just high as. And I'm like, all right. And they're like, come in, come in the room. And then we close the door. And there's like five locks on the door. And they lock all of them. Dude, they lock. There's like a bunch of them extra locks. And then I'm like, oh, this is gonna be bad. And then they just got as high and showed us really cool videos. They were really nice. And we drank.

[A]

What? Wait, they were like, I'll roll back up to get you guys.

[B]

Yeah, no, grandma never came back. That girl like left and went to go. One of the dudes, I think, and like disappeared into. Then I don't know where she went. And then we were, I was like, what are we gonna do? And my friend was already hammered and she was like, we'll walk home. And I'm like, I'm scared to walk home. I'm like, what if we get kidnapped? Even though I'm doing all these things with her, like going, I'm terrified the whole time, but I'm doing them because they're funny. Like I do things for. And I always have. Yeah. The story, I'm like, this is, this would be funny. So she's like, we're going to walk home. So we take drinks to go. I remember at this point, we're still drinking, we take drinks to go. When we show up to the house, her mom is up and she, she's like waiting for us to come home. And, and on the walk home, Rachel needed a pee, so she pulled down her pants and she peed in someone's yard. And so we pull up, her underwear is hanging out of her zipper. We're hammered. We smell like weed. We're 13 years old. We come back, her underwear is hanging out of her zipper. And her. My mom's like, you guys have been doing God knows what with God knows who and your underwear is hanging out. You're going in a two step program tomorrow. Then, then.

[A]

12, just starting. You know, I, I, look, I ain't gonna make you do all 12 of them, but God damn it, you go start the first.

[B]

She's just a kid. Yeah, she's just.

[A]

It's a junior program. Two step for underage.

[B]

Two step, yeah.

[A]

That is something drunk would say in the morning.

[B]

And then she slapped Rachel and then Rachel ran into my arms and we're hammered. And she's like, you two need to go to bed and sober up. This is like my best friend from second grade. Like, yeah, in the morning her mom was like, you have a problem? To her 13 year old daughter. And then everyone kind of forgot about it and we all moved on.

[A]

All right, good. You were fidgeting with the Rubik's Cube over here. And you did that. And then you're like, you want a flower? And I was like, were you grounded a lot? This is behavior that seems like someone who was grounded a lot. Yeah, like, I was grounded a lot.

[B]

I was grounded a lot.

[A]

What were. Like, what. When you were grounded, what was it I had. What weren't you allowed to do? What did you have to do? Like, did your mom make you do chores or was it, like, just go in there and don't do well?

[B]

We had to clean, like, all the. Like, in the weekends, we had to, like, wake up, and my mom would be like, for every weekend, we'd have to wake up and clean the bathroom, clean our room. We had to clean our rooms every day and stuff like that. So me mostly, I got grounded for, like, having an attitude, talking back, like, kind of being a. In general.

[A]

And what was grounded? Like, no, T. Like, what were your rules? You know what I mean? Restrictions.

[B]

Oh, yeah. They take away my tv, which would really upset me. They would take away my phone. But my mom was like, okay, so this is the thing. I. Even now. This is. Now we're getting into therapy. Even now, I, like, I do not in relationships. I don't get into relationships where I, like, publicly fight or fight in front of people or, like, you know, I don't like seeing people argue. And when I was younger, my mom did use, like, embarrassment as a punishment. So, like, if she was mad at me, she would, like, say she wanted me out of her house or something, and then pack up my clothes and drop them off at school, like, throw them out in the parking lot. At school.

[A]

At school.

[B]

And I'd have to, like, pick them up or. Yeah. Or in front of my work. Yeah. Yeah, Your job. Yeah. Or like, you know, if I, you know, if I was crying or something and my friends in the neighborhood were around, she'd bring them in and be like, look, she's crying. She's like such little baby Jesus. So she tried to, like, embarrass me as punishment. Or like, she, you know, she, like, I don't know. She'll just tell everybody everything, you know, she's like, I'm going to tell business. Yeah, all your business. All my business. Yeah. So. So I was grounded a lot because I'd be like, don't do that. And she'd be like, you can't say. I'm like, you told everyone I got my period. And I heard you, and I. You said you weren't gonna tell anyone.

[A]

Yeah. You heard?

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

She really did that.

[B]

She did. And then she also. When I got my period, she made it so awkward.

[A]

She tell, like, family.

[B]

She called everyone in our family and told everyone in our family and then told my stepdad and then made it so obvious at dinner, like, serving me food and being like, you okay? And I was like, stop talking to me. Like, I was like, stop. Don't look at me like that. It's like. Like, I just can't. And she'd, like, make it about herself. It was like a whole thing. Like, my daughter got her period. I'm like, can you leave me alone? If your daughter's getting her period, be cool. Be cool about it.

[A]

Yeah, Tom, give me some advice. I'm about to hit that wall here in a second.

[B]

Just be cool about it. Don't. Don't make it too heartfelt. It's already. I'm so embarrassing.

[A]

That's good. Don't make it heartfelt. And also don't make it weird.

[B]

Don't make it weird. And don't. Just be casual. Be like, this is what happened.

[A]

Don't be the comedian. Be the dad during this one.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Later I can be in the grocery store yelling about it, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or facetimer and be like, can I get. You need to super dip?

[B]

Yeah. Let her get used to it. The first one's weird, dude. The first one, you're like, this.

[A]

This ain't right for the heads up. Yeah, I'm with you. I got it. I could only imagine if I woke up, looked out, I'm like, oh, my God.

[B]

I got my first period in middle school on the one day in my entire life that I ever wore a white skirt.

[A]

No.

[B]

In my entire life.

[A]

Did it.

[B]

It didn't. I was on the bus at the end of the day, luckily, so I don't think anyone even really noticed.

[A]

But let's talk about summer school. You said you went to summer school.

[B]

Oh, yeah, I went to summer school.

[A]

I had to go one year, too. I want to hear your story first.

[B]

Well, I always went to summer school because I didn't really have to study and stuff. So I didn't do well in school because I didn't.

[A]

Because you had no parental push at home.

[B]

Yeah, I didn't. I would. I would skate. Was by with seas. And then everyone. At first. My first few years, I was doing really bad. This is so funny. The only time I ever got straight A's in school was one year when there was just one girl that was a And my friend. And. And I. And I was new in the school. I went to a new school, like, every year too. We moved a lot. I don't know why. And. And. And. And then I was like, that girl's kind of mean. And then someone's like, yeah, and she's the only one that gets all A's. And that's the only year I have ever got all ice.

[A]

You just cheat all.

[B]

And then I went, no. I just was like, I'm gonna be smarter than this.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

And I got all A's. And then I went back to failing again the next year.

[A]

You're like, there is nothing I said I was gonna do.

[B]

I was like, yeah, I could do this. I don't want to. So I would go to summer school because my grades were really bad and summer school was kind of fun. All the bad kids went and. And they sold good snacks. I don't know why.

[A]

When I went to summer, really, look, I had good grades. I was an A and B student. My mom hated me. Okay?

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I have two brothers, and my mom decides fourth grade, I'm going to summer school. I'm like, why am I. They don't go. I have a twin brother. We're the same age.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why is he not going? My grades are as good as.

[B]

She's just picking you to go.

[A]

She just got rid of my ass. I don't know what they did for the summer. I can't remember. I think this was the time when my mom was cheating on my dad. And I probably would have thought talked too much and said too much. So I get dumped into, like, fourth grade. Summer school.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

For the whole summer, my grades are good. The eve school was even like, he doesn't need to be here. Yeah. And I'll never forget one day, I don't know what holiday it was or something, but there was no summer school. My mom drops me off. There's no cell phones back then or anything. She's going to this dude's house, Okay? I don't have this guy's number, okay? I sat at that summer school. I just sat outside from eight to three when she came back to get me because there was no school that day. Summer school. I had to sit there.

[B]

She didn't call.

[A]

Who? Who's she calling? This is the 80s girl. This is the 80s. Who's she calling? She had to get on that dude's phone and call the school. My mom ain't doing that because she thought it was a normal day and it wasn't like it was like, whatever. They're like, we're not having it. The worst clothes this day. But my mom just dumped me off and then drove.

[B]

You should have came to my summer school. My summer.

[A]

I would have rather. I would have hung out. I'm out there pulling doors and I'm.

[B]

Like, they sold chocolate. I don't know why Summer school. They saw they sold the Hershey's with the almonds. That's what got me addicted to Hershey's with the almond summer school. That's why here. She's with the almonds because of summer school and chips and.

[A]

Yeah, tell me about. Let's do family parties. You guys used to have family parties?

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Now. What do you mean? Like just family comes over or your family would throw a party. Anyone's coming.

[B]

My parents were. My mom and my stepdad were really big on karaoke parties when we were young. Yeah, like they had like. We would go to the flea market every Friday and even if we didn't have any money, they would save up money to get new karaoke CDs.

[A]

Yeah, that was there.

[B]

That was like. They're like, we're this, We're. This is what we do as a family and this is what we spend our money.

[A]

Wait, what was your mom's song? What's the one she liked?

[B]

She likes Zombie. The Cranberries. Yeah. And. Yeah. And. And, and they would have. They had a whole stepdad that he.

[A]

Have like his go to was.

[B]

Oh, he. He is dad rock cover. But he's in a cover band right now.

[A]

He. Oh, he really is.

[B]

Yeah. So he's taking it to the next level. Yes, he's in a cover band.

[A]

What's it called?

[B]

The Comeback Kid.

[A]

Kid. He's just one guy. But it was a band.

[B]

It's a whole band.

[A]

That is.

[B]

And they get booked.

[A]

Do they really?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

He like does my mom right now. My mom is 77 and she's a groupie for a band that she met at the beach called on the Edge. And she's like their unofficial photographer.

[B]

That's so funny.

[A]

My brother hates it.

[B]

That's so mad about it.

[A]

And I get so much joy that he hates it. Ote, they're old dudes. They're all age appropriate. I'll say that.

[B]

She's not like run around 20 year olds fair.

[A]

They're all age appropriate, you know, older men and. But she's 100. A groupie for Ote.

[B]

That is really funny. On the Edge is such a perverted name too for a band on the edge. Your mom's on the edge. She's in.

[A]

She's an edge. So listen, they go so much. They call them the edgettes, and they have shirts and. And listen.

[B]

Your mom's an edge.

[A]

Yeah, she's an edge. And not only that, listen. They got mad bookings. They got mad bookings, dude. I look at their schedule. Like, who the setting them up?

[B]

He should. They should pair up with Comeback kids.

[A]

That's what I'm saying. Our mom should.

[B]

Yes. Dude. My stepdad banned my mom. My stepdad banned my mom from.

[A]

Wait, she can't come to show?

[B]

No, they're divorced. Oh, they're divorced now? And she. And then she kept coming, and then he called her a barfly.

[A]

She kept coming.

[B]

After they were divorced, he called her a bar fly.

[A]

And she got that got her out of there.

[B]

No, no. He had to get remarried and a restraining order.

[A]

Even the remarried dude, they had to.

[B]

Hide where the wedding was. And my mom was trying to get it out of me on the wedding day. She's like. She was like. She was like, literally tricking me. She was like, so I already know where it is. So. Yeah, we had a lot of karaoke parties. And they were. And every party, even if it was.

[A]

Did you sing, too? Did you get the.

[B]

Yeah, I would. I would sing and I would join in on a few duets. I'd hit a little Kid Rock, Cheryl Crow.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah, I do a little Snoop or whatever with N Word. And it was a long time ago. It was a different time.

[A]

It was a different time.

[B]

And. And. But all of the parties that my family had were they. Even if it was like, my fifth birthday, by the end of the night, it became an adults party, where they're like, the kids need to go in the room. The parents are making out with each other's partners in the Jacuzzi. So they're playing some weird go under the water game in the Jacuzzi. I don't know what's happening. Every time it'd be like, you know, we'd. And it would be fun for us because we'd have parties. Like when we started turning, like 12, 13, 14. They'd have parties, and we'd sneak the alcohol and I'll go in my room, and all the teenagers from the other parents would be over our house, and we'd have our own little thing and. Yeah.

[A]

All right, let's finish with favorite toys. Give me some of what you're going. What year are you born?

[B]

90.

[A]

All right, so 90. So even at 10 is 2,000.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

What do you. What are you playing with?

[B]

I have some good. One of my favorite games is this game where you date. You figure out which boy likes you. It's like you call boys on a phone. It's a board game.

[A]

It is.

[B]

Yes. It's this board game.

[A]

What's it called?

[B]

I think it's Dream Phone. Dream Phone. That one? Yeah. Those were my babies. Those are my men. This is all Dan. I loved Dan. Dude.

[A]

Dating game for girl.

[B]

Dream Phone. Yeah. It was a board game, and you'd pick up these things, and you'd have to figure out which was your dream guy. Like, you were matched up with someone, and you call, and you'd call, and Steve would pick up, and he'd be like, it's not me, but your dream guy. And he'd give a clue. And it was always a different. Every game. And you'd find your dream guy at the end, and you'd just be horny and calling men that didn't exist. This is like a very horny teenage.

[A]

What a dumb game. We're baiting them live over here at the park.

[B]

Yeah. I was like, this sucks. Let's get in the chat rooms. Yeah. And then I. There was this 90s game that I really love. It was a Nickelodeon or it was a flashlight. So it's that. And it comes with a projector. And you turn off all the lights in the house.

[A]

Check it on the wall.

[B]

No, no, no. And you pose some. Someone poses in front of it, and you take a picture, and when you move, it, like, stays. It's the coolest thing ever. Yeah. And you'd move, and the image would stay after you flash for a while. And it also had a pen you could draw with a light on.

[A]

It slowly fades away.

[B]

Yeah. We'd make inappropriate pictures. Make, like, dicks and, like, stuff like that. And then. Yeah, you could draw things.

[A]

You can draw on it and.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. That was one of our favorites.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I want one of those now.

[A]

How much are they still?

[B]

50 bucks. Yeah, it's not bad. But then I think you got to get the projector. That was only one part of it, but, yeah, that was one of my favorites. I love that.

[A]

Well, you're one of my favorites, and I love you. Thank you for doing. This is a lot of fun.

[B]

Thank you for having me on. This is awesome.

[A]

Promote one more time. Anything you'd like.

[B]

Kim congdon.com childless milf on YouTube. Magic prank show on Netflix. This podcast with Sarah Weinshank. The Kim Congdon takeover while show [e-mail] and thank you guys so much, you guys, I love your audience. They're the nicest people in the world.

[A]

So nice you to say that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Thank you, Kim Kong, of course, as always, Ryan Sickler on all your social media. RyanCickler.com we'll talk to you all next week.