Danny Put Together the Worst Valentines Day Fit Ever | The Yak 2-16-26

Summary

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The Yak – Episode Summary

Episode: "Danny Put Together the Worst Valentine’s Day Fit Ever"
Date: February 16, 2026
Hosts: Kyle “KBNoSwag” Bauer, Nick, Brandon Walker, Rone, Lil Sas, Kate, Steven Cheah (out), Big Cat, Donnie, Titus, Mikey, TJ, Danny

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Overview

The Yak crew gathers for their usual raucous roundtable, diving into everything from disastrous Valentine’s Day outfits and vacation recaps, to the misadventures of Barstool staffers overseas. The show’s core is the comedic shaming and support of its hosts’ life choices, ranging from fashion fails to new exercise routines. This episode bounces between stories of cringe fits, wild travel, group fitness ambitions, and the unique micro-dramas only Yak regulars could invent, all keeping in line with Barstool’s raw, irreverent tone.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Danny’s Infamous Valentine’s Day “Fit”

[02:18 – 06:21]

• The group roasts Danny for an Instagram story—a wrinkled, ragged shirt during a brunch date with Jackie, posted on Valentine’s Day.
• Brandon: “He went on a date night dressed for a tailgate in 1997” [02:39].
• Turns out the photo was older, from a Bears-Packers game, but the crew refuses to relinquish the bit.
• Kate: “My actual Valentine’s Day fit was a lot worse.”
• Deep dive into whether Danny “gave up,” with jokes about avoiding future infidelities simply by showing the outfit pic as evidence.
• Danny (deadpan): “So we make fun of Danny for his shitty clothes and a shitty car. You’re poor.” [05:02]

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2. Brandon’s Cayman Islands Vacation

[07:06 – 14:53]

• Brandon recounts nearly being detained over weed gummies at customs in the very religious, highly-regulated Cayman Islands.
• Profiling story: “I got racially profiled for being a chill ass dude. Like, straight up, they’re like, that guy’s chill.” [09:57]
• Describes tourist excursions, failed massage expectations, wild tourist traps (stingray-feeding), and the island’s strict no-weed policies.
• Donnie: “A Caribbean island not allowing weed? That seems...”
• Brandon: “That’s false advertisement.” [13:47]
• The story becomes a punchline for the rest of the crew, with Brandon musing that the mugshot would have all been worth it.

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3. The “Hate List” – Yak Members’ Pet Peeves

[18:15 – 21:04]

• Brandon reveals he spent vacation composing a personal “hate list.”
• Examples: pre-appointment forms (“I’m not filling it out beforehand!” [19:04]), brown rice (“Garbage. You can taste the difference!” [19:22]), and waist-level bushes (“I want a tall bush or a shrub. Not waist level.” [20:54]).
• Plans for a future segment where all will compile and share their hate lists.

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4. Barstool Turkey Hair Transplant Saga

[40:32 – 53:58]

• Updates about multiple Barstool guys traveling to Turkey to get hair transplants.
• Mincy’s catastrophic post-surgery head bleed, and Mook/Pat’s wild experiences.
• Eddie: “So, Pat wasn’t like freaking out? ...He was vibrating.” [50:30]
• Mishaps: improper post-op care, towel mishaps, clarinet-wielding grifters on tourist boats, and speculation over who will heal best.
• Brandon: “The procedure is all about how you heal. So that’s not a good way to heal.”

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5. Fitness & Weight Loss Face-Off

[68:44 – 89:43]

• Kyle and Brandon both confess to being at their heaviest weights (“278 pounds…that’s the first time I’ve ever been 278 in my life.” – Kyle, [69:08]).
• They vow to embark on a group fitness journey involving a viral, awkward 16-minute daily exercise routine, as seen on social media.
• Brandon: “All we gotta do is look goofy for 10 minutes… If you get to 300, you’ll lose like 10 instantly.” [74:43]
• Much joking about scales, “touch three, lose 100,” and the importance of energy over looks.
• Group chat riffs: headphones that don’t fit, the dream of “hitting 300,” and the struggle to get up from the floor without using hands.

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6. Women’s Sports Bar & “Babes in Logan Square” Review

[34:31 – 37:01, 113:01 onward]

• Mikey reports on her experience at a women’s sports bar in Chicago:
  • Clean bathrooms, polite patrons, diverse (and mostly women) crowd.
  • Mikey: “I was gonna say nut to butt, but I guess clam to jam.” [36:01]
  • The vibe: pre-games, queer speed dating, astrology nights, clean and friendly but “not a place for riff-raff.”
• Provides color on clientele, events, and whether men seeking to pick up women should consider it a “red flag.”

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7. Miscellaneous Banter, Viral Topics, and Nonsense

• KD Burner Account drama: Ongoing Twitter misadventures of Kevin Durant, with theories that he roasts himself from a secret account. [97:01]
• “Rice Bucket” and “Grip Strength” talk: The virtue (or scam) of quirky internet exercise challenges. [65:00+]
• Observations on documentaries (“Free Solo”), the tragedy of fog (JFK Jr./Kobe), reminiscing about offensive 90s t-shirts, and school pranks.
• Wheel punishments, “Wet Wheel,” and the running bits about show regulars getting soaked, with the “legendary” reactions.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• Brandon, on Danny’s fit: “That was your Valentine’s Day date, wasn’t it? …He went on a date night dressed for a tailgate in 1997.” [03:00, 02:39]
• Kyle, on Brandon’s hate: “Waist level bushes. Those aren’t worth hating.” [20:58]
• Brandon, on the Cayman incident: “I was that close. Oof, that close.” [11:21]
• Kyle, on exercise routines: “We’re dumber than we were in the 1300s.” [88:19]
• Mikey, on the women’s bar: “I was gonna say nut to butt, but I guess clam to jam.” [36:01]
• Donnie, on weird ice fishing mishaps: “You died saving your boy’s cock ring.” [62:12]
• Brandon, on being profiled as a ‘chill guy’: “I got racially profiled for being a chill ass dude. Like, straight up, they’re like, that guy’s chill. And then they tried to get me.” [09:57]
• Brandon, on KD’s social media addiction: “He’s such a loser when it comes to this [Twitter].” [97:54]

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Notable Segments & Timestamps

• Danny’s fit/photo roast: [02:18 – 06:21]
• Brandon’s Cayman weed scare: [09:55 – 14:53]
• Hate List Introduced: [18:15 – 21:04]
• Turkey trip & post-op disasters: [40:32 – 53:58]
• Fitness viral routine challenge begins: [68:44 – 89:43]
• Women’s sports bar report: [34:31 – 37:01, ~113:01 onward]
• KD’s Twitter burner story: [97:01 – 99:07]
• Wet Wheel – end of episode hijinks: [120:45 onward]

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Final Notes

This episode encapsulates The Yak’s unique mix of brash humor, group self-deprecation, relentless ribbing, and a surprising ability to pivot from roasting fashion to debating ancient exercise for longevity. The show is a parade of in-jokes and emboldened self-awareness, best highlighted by long-running bits like “Wet Wheel” and the recurring cast taking fitness and masculinity way less seriously than their core audience might.

For new listeners, this episode offers a crystal-clear view into the group dynamic: relentless, hilarious, occasionally juvenile—but always unfiltered Barstool.

Transcript

[Danny]

Hey yak listeners. You can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.

[Brandon]

Out on the course, they're the PGA.

[Danny]

Tour's best players, but in the arena, they're prime time.

[Brandon]

And season two of TGL, presented by SoFi, is back. With lights, cameras, action. We're talking big moments, big personalities, big names in the stands, all on the big screen. Big time matchups with shot clocks, Hammer.

[Danny]

Drops timeouts, overtime and playoffs.

[Kyle]

It's.

[Brandon]

It's city versus city, squad versus squad. This sport just hits different under the lights. It's TGL, presented by SoFi.

[Kyle]

Keep up.

[Brandon]

It's golf. Tune in to every match only on ESPN. 3, 2, 1. Are you serious?

[Danny]

I'm the coolest one out of all of us.

[Brandon]

That was incredible. Whoa. What was that?

[Kyle]

Sheep.

[Brandon]

Sheep?

[Danny]

Yeah, it's a new thing we're doing.

[Brandon]

We're doing sheep.

[Danny]

Yeah, Just like a sheep transition. You've been going for a long time.

[Brandon]

Damn.

[Donnie]

You're doing sheep.

[Danny]

People are calling that an all time episode when we. The sheep transition. Yeah, you missed it.

[Brandon]

What's up, everyone? Back St Blue Coffee, stillbluecoffee.com Go right now. By the way, we're doing a curling stream on Thursday night and we're gonna do a stow. Blue coffee, everyone. Like every thousand dollars you buy, it's gonna either be, I'm gonna give 200 to the chat or there's gonna be punishments and Pete is gonna be on the stream. Oh, I want to see some punishments for Pete. So drink water.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Look at that.

[Brandon]

We're curling. Yo, what's up, guys? Missed the out of you, did you? I've been gone so long.

[Kyle]

All of us.

[Brandon]

Brandon's a charity case now.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Oh, yeah, I missed all of that. Yeah, I finally caught up a little bit yesterday and I was like, damn.

[Danny]

On Fridays mostly. You said you're done speaking to him.

[Kyle]

Yeah, I'm done.

[Danny]

He's blocked.

[Kyle]

I'm nothing for him. Yeah, nothing for him.

[Donnie]

Wow.

[Kate]

He throws out crazy insults all the time. He called me a rapist.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Oh, sir, he did.

[Kate]

Beach house.

[Brandon]

No. The only thing you would rape is a. An Italian beef with your bare starter jacket on Valentine's Day. That's.

[Kate]

That wasn't Valentine's Day.

[Brandon]

Wait a minute.

[Kyle]

What?

[Brandon]

What?

[Kyle]

I hate to ruin your fun.

[Kate]

That was. That was bad.

[Brandon]

He went on a date night dressed for a tailgate in 1997. Yeah, dude, I'll let you have your.

[Kate]

Fun, but that wasn't from Valley that was. That was Bears package. What was the fit?

[Brandon]

Let's see the fit.

[Mikey]

Are you talking about the brunch where he wore that raggedy T shirt?

[Kate]

See, that's what I thought you were talking about when you were making fun of my clothes.

[Danny]

No.

[Brandon]

There was a picture of you. Were you at the aquarium?

[Kate]

Yeah, but that wasn't Valentine's Day.

[Brandon]

It was.

[Danny]

But that was your Valentine's Day date, wasn't it?

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

No.

[Brandon]

Were you on a date?

[Kate]

Yeah, that was a date for you.

[Brandon]

Posted on Valentine's Day.

[Kate]

Yeah, in an old picture. That was from Bears Packers. That's fair.

[Brandon]

With Jackie here. Yeah, she was here that day. Oh, you posted on Valentine's Day. I was like, damn, they put on some swag.

[Kyle]

Normal to throw out an old picture.

[Donnie]

Swag for B.

[Kyle]

For B day.

[Brandon]

He put on his finest starter jacket.

[TJ]

Love.

[Brandon]

Oh, I'm going to. You know what? Now that you've given me the actual facts behind it, I choose to not accept it. I'm going to go with. I'm just going to go with Valentine's Day start. Can you post? Can you show the picture?

[Kate]

Too bad. Stories expire.

[Eddie]

No.

[Brandon]

Is it. Oh, no. For real. That was a story. Send it to. Send it to.

[Danny]

Why did you throw it on the grid, Dan?

[Brandon]

Send it to. Are you guys not grid official?

[Kate]

I think Dante.

[Danny]

Dante tweeted it.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Dante tweeted it. Yeah. This is going to be how I choose to remember Danny and Jackie.

[Kyle]

I figured in a bear, you gotta.

[Brandon]

Wear it at your. Your wedding. I'll pay for your wedding if you wear that. Oh, done. Look at that.

[Danny]

Happy Valentine's Day.

[Brandon]

Valentine's Day. Yeah. Oh, yeah, bro. Is decked.

[Donnie]

Valentine's Day with the snapback.

[Danny]

You must really love her, man.

[Mikey]

Listen, listen.

[Kate]

My actual Valentine.

[Brandon]

The idea of you wearing that on Valent is so much funnier. I need to just keep that alive in my head. Please let me have that.

[Kate]

My actual Valentine. Stay fit Was a lot worse.

[Mikey]

They're in this beautiful, bright brunch spot. Looks lovely. And he's wearing this, like, raggedy brown shirt with. I was very confused because Danny normally.

[Titus]

Now I gotta see that picture.

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Now I gotta see that. Yeah. The raggedy shirt.

[Kate]

Unfortunately, a video.

[Brandon]

Oh, can you. Can you send it to tj or do you.

[Titus]

Really. Any picture you.

[Brandon]

Yeah, you know what? Just give your phone. We're gonna need your phone.

[Danny]

So we make fun of Danny for his shitty clothes and a shitty car. You're poor.

[Brandon]

But all those bonus bets, dude.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Man.

[Brandon]

What about the bonus?

[Danny]

Oh, Danny.

[Mikey]

Look at all wrinkles.

[Danny]

Happy bell, Danny.

[Kate]

Did any of you guys ever think that maybe we showed up to a restaurant and it was nicer than Jackie thought, and she had wore a hoodie, and so then I tried to make her feel better by crumpling my shirt?

[Brandon]

No chance.

[Titus]

Why are you looking?

[Brandon]

Because I sure would have.

[Kyle]

I sure wish I would have thought it.

[Mikey]

Yeah, sure.

[Donnie]

She's from a top capsule.

[Titus]

Yeah, you're looking at the fork like you're Ariel. What was that?

[Kate]

It was a mega spork. And they. That was what they gave us.

[Brandon]

All right, I'm gonna say I don't want to list. I'm happy to be back. I miss you guys so much. And I don't want to get it aggressive right off the rip, but I have to say something.

[Kate]

It's a little late.

[Brandon]

No, actually, no, it's too.

[Kate]

We know how this works.

[Danny]

That was the most wrinkled I've ever seen a shirt.

[Kate]

I wasn't planning on taking my jacket off. It got a little hot in the.

[Brandon]

If Jackie ever cheats on you, we can just show that picture and it'll make.

[Danny]

Honestly, can't even do a.

[Kate]

A bonus Valentine's Day breakfast anymore.

[Brandon]

Oh, Jackie cheated on Danny. Well, did you see that? That's a Valentine, all right. Yeah, he gave up a long time ago.

[Danny]

What was the jacket?

[Donnie]

She's with her bro now.

[Danny]

Yeah, she's with her bow.

[Kate]

What do we got in the prep sheet?

[Danny]

It's all you, man.

[Brandon]

It's all you. No, I missed the. Steven's not here.

[Danny]

Vacation.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Damn.

[Kyle]

She can't expect him.

[Danny]

Wait, is he on vacation?

[Mikey]

Actually, no. School's off today and tomorrow.

[Danny]

Oh, whoa.

[Brandon]

Yeah, I know. Cps, they stack dates. I don't know why they do. Like there's a holiday and then there's a teacher summit day, and they stack them together.

[Kate]

I hate to shift negative focus on someone else, but do you think Stephen Chase taken more vacations days than like.

[Kyle]

A normal job would allow?

[Brandon]

Probably, yeah.

[Donnie]

Just wondering. Like a couple stints in Door County.

[Mikey]

A couple tours, Door county veterans.

[Danny]

He might have done back to back weeks. He did door, came home, went back to door.

[Brandon]

I mean, a bonus revolving back door.

[Danny]

Get me back to door.

[Brandon]

He was a local for a minute there.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Yeah. But yeah, it was great. Great, great vacation tan as.

[Mikey]

Say it. You're go.

[Brandon]

You're glowing tan, slept in spray, no alarm clock any day. Drank eight ice cream Sundays every night.

[Donnie]

Wow. Oh, yeah. You deserve it.

[Brandon]

Even last night, the last Night I was on vacation. They were. They didn't have it on the menu. Ask the guy. I was like, could you help me out? I got you, bro.

[Donnie]

Maybe have ice cream back there. Of course they can.

[Brandon]

Of course they could do it.

[Kyle]

What was this?

[Brandon]

Yeah, there's a Cayman island things, by the way, that I put Renegade as the music. It was not.

[Danny]

Oh, I. I got fooled.

[Donnie]

I was like, what's playing?

[Brandon]

It was abba.

[Danny]

Okay.

[Brandon]

But yeah, no, I was like, I got this looks like the saddest renegade possible. Yeah. I went to two restaurants where it just was like kind of a club. But also dinner where there would just be blasting music.

[Donnie]

That's my idea.

[Brandon]

And then having people do this. Two back to back restaurant nights.

[Titus]

They do it all night for one.

[Brandon]

No, they're just like. Everyone whip them around.

[Danny]

That's like, wow.

[Titus]

So you do it one time throughout the dinner.

[Kyle]

They did.

[Titus]

Or was it like every. It was like a few minutes that someone.

[Brandon]

It was every like 10th song.

[Titus]

Okay.

[Brandon]

They'd be like, all right, let's. Let's really get it going.

[Donnie]

That's weird.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

What kind of music?

[Brandon]

That was abba. The other one was I. We went to a steakhouse.

[Kate]

It was just.

[Brandon]

There was just a dj. It was just too terrible.

[Donnie]

That's how would like it.

[Brandon]

Oh, see, it was too loud, but it was good. Time went. Got two massages zero times. Jerked off. No, that sucked. Cuz I was kind of expecting the second time.

[Danny]

You just got to do it yourself.

[Brandon]

Well, I tipped really well in the first one. Then I got the same woman.

[Donnie]

I was like, that's a good move. Tip it.

[Titus]

Yeah, yeah.

[Brandon]

Like way pre tipped. Pre tipped? Yeah, but that did nothing for me.

[Mikey]

Stingrays.

[Brandon]

Stingrays Touched the Out of some stingrays.

[Danny]

What?

[Kate]

You went to. You went to a shut aquarium on Valentine's Day?

[Kyle]

That's crazy. He's trying to come back.

[Danny]

He's getting back.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Danny]

You guys had the same Valentine's Day?

[Brandon]

No, they were actually in the wild. Danny.

[Kyle]

Gotcha.

[Brandon]

It's like, you know when you're in a tourist thing and you're like, this is kind of ridiculous. That was the stingray thing. It was like 15 boats all anchored and dudes just feeding stingrays and stingrays.

[Kyle]

Just.

[Brandon]

That's the stingray. Yeah, right.

[Danny]

Did you get wasted?

[Brandon]

I got wasted on Saturday on the boat. That was good.

[Donnie]

Cross faded.

[Brandon]

Cross faded.

[Danny]

Whoa.

[Brandon]

Which you're not allowed to do in Cayman Islands.

[Donnie]

What do you mean?

[Danny]

You can't have Zaza.

[Brandon]

They're not you can't. I almost got arrested going into the island. I, I got racially profiled for being a chill ass dude. Like straight up, they're like, that guy's chill. And then they tried to get me.

[Donnie]

Is it an uptight ass island?

[Brandon]

It's very religious. But so I go in, we go through customs, and I had the double whammy. I go, I go to customs and the guy's like, he's on my ass. And there actually was a moment where I was like, I think my wife might have set me up to like, just get rid of me because I'll just be in Cayman island jail forever. Because it was way too like, he, he basically picked me out of a lineup. Like this guy asked me, this should have been illegal, but he asked me if I smoke and I was like, yeah, dude, like you said, yeah, well, yeah. Why? I didn't want to be.

[Danny]

Yeah, you don't want to be.

[Brandon]

And then he immediately was like, well, you know, it's illegal in this, this island and like, you'll go to jail if you have anything. And he's like, tell me right now if you have anything. And I was like, no, I'm good. I mean, I did have something, but I was like, I'm good, I don't have anything. Then he was like, what do you do for a living? I was like, podcaster. I was like, fuck.

[Kyle]

I really.

[Brandon]

Yeah, that's smoking. Podcaster. He went through my entire bag, like thoroughly. Went to my toiletry kit, picked out my bottle of pills that are just. It's just ibuprofen. Looked at it, put it back in the ibro. There's no ibuprofen. It was all gummies in there. I was that close. Oof, that close.

[Danny]

What's the penalty?

[Brandon]

I don't know. But at the whole time, this is how up my content brain was like, the whole time I was like, okay, would this suck? Yeah. But also be an incredible story. A lot of T shirts.

[Danny]

A lot of T shirts.

[Donnie]

Wait, so he didn't define your gummies.

[Brandon]

He did not find them. But he was holding the bottle. If he had just opened the bottle, I would have been like, he picked out the bottle and looked at it and I was like, it's ibuprofen. And then he put it back. He was, he was going, well, you.

[Donnie]

Would have went to jail.

[Brandon]

He said that. He was like, if you tell me right now, like if you have anything, otherwise you're gonna go, is it, is.

[Titus]

It like, haha, I was in jail or Is it like Brittney Griner?

[Brandon]

I don't know. I don't know.

[Donnie]

Yeah, some countries are strict with weed.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

Did you have, like, Grateful Dead on?

[Danny]

Yeah. How did he.

[Brandon]

No, I was wearing a black hat. I think I just looked like a chill ass.

[Titus]

You have beads in your hair.

[Brandon]

I look like.

[Danny]

Yeah, he did. Yeah.

[Brandon]

This is going in. I look like. Yeah, I. I think I have, like a. The problem is I don't have a. I was gonna say I have a case against Cayman Islands for profiling me as a chill ass dude, but I did, in fact have weed, so.

[Danny]

Right.

[Brandon]

I was doing. There we go. Wait, wait. So what happened?

[Danny]

They killed her.

[Brandon]

Damn. Did she actually go to jail?

[Danny]

There's no way to handle a friend.

[Brandon]

After Lugo's search, they arrived on a private jet in court and paid a fine. Okay, all right. So I would have had to pay a fine. Would have been cool, though. If I got cuffed.

[Danny]

It would have been worth it for the mug shot.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah.

[Donnie]

A couple hours.

[Brandon]

What a badass mug shot.

[Kyle]

1200 fine.

[Titus]

Oh, that's easy.

[Brandon]

That's nothing.

[Mikey]

In Mexico, they let my friend with all the mushrooms in her bag through, and then they pulled me aside and all I had, they just put. They have this metal table. All my raggedy ass Hanes.

[Danny]

Naturally, I was like, oh, yeah, Wait, you're.

[Donnie]

Hey, you're hatings.

[Titus]

What Hanes?

[Mikey]

My underwear. Oh, like, my raggedy old underwear with, like, the waistband elastic falling out of them and the like to, like.

[Danny]

Handle them.

[Mikey]

They put a Hazmat suit on.

[Titus]

They're like male tidy white.

[Donnie]

Yeah, like the variety that we wear or what?

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Oh, my God.

[Mikey]

Ladies jail. I feel like that's our thing. And you guys took it.

[Donnie]

We did.

[Brandon]

No.

[Titus]

Well, maybe we did, but it was anyway.

[Brandon]

A Caribbean island not allowing weed. That seems.

[Titus]

Yeah, it's false advertisement.

[Mikey]

You said Cayton island is religious.

[Brandon]

Some guy was telling me we're at a bar on Friday, and he was like, yeah, on Saturday they close all the bars at, like, 11pm because they don't want anyone drunk at church on Sunday.

[Kyle]

Wow.

[Brandon]

And, like, the whole island's very religious, so. Huh. Yeah. That seems counterintuitive.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Right.

[Brandon]

Like, Cayman was where you go for, like, tax.

[Mikey]

Yeah, tax evasion. Did you go on any excursions, like, into the jungle or anything?

[Brandon]

There's not really a jungle. Went on a boat, saw the stingrays. That's enough about it.

[Mikey]

That's all you need to do. You don't need to be doing too.

[Titus]

Much bunch of crabs that I, when I was there, I, I ran over a bunch of crabs.

[Danny]

You ran them over?

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

And you have to.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

Oh, is that when they're doing that?

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Yeah. I don't know if that's like your round though, or it's just like.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

When I was there.

[Brandon]

But I also learned that there's a billionaire that I was not familiar with that we all should be familiar with who, like, basically owns the island. Ken Dart. He's the guy who created styrofoam and solo cups. Oh, you can't find anything about him. He renounced his U.S. citizenship in 1994.

[Donnie]

And became a Cayman Island Ken Dart.

[Brandon]

Ken Dart. There he is, Kenneth.

[Danny]

Actual zombie.

[Donnie]

He made like the red, the red cups.

[Brandon]

I think he makes solo cups.

[Donnie]

I guess that's a billion dollar thing.

[Brandon]

And he just lives on Cayman Island? Yeah. Dark container and Solo cup company, man.

[Donnie]

How long has he been there?

[Brandon]

Since 1994. He has not been a U.S. citizen.

[Mikey]

Also a citizen of Belize and Ireland.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Dude just doesn't like us.

[Mikey]

Michigan, man.

[Brandon]

Former Michigan's wealthiest person.

[Kyle]

Cranbrook. That's a private school.

[Danny]

Yeah, he did.

[Mikey]

Yes, he did, actually.

[Donnie]

I didn't know that was a real place.

[Kyle]

Yeah, right.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Good vacation. Good to be back, though.

[Danny]

You should have used those amnesty boxes at the airport.

[Brandon]

Oh, what are those?

[Danny]

That's where you put your drugs in.

[Brandon]

Oh, really? Yeah.

[Danny]

A dork alarm should go off if you do that. Yeah. I've never seen anybody at them.

[Brandon]

What would you guys have answered, though, when the guy was like, do you smoke?

[Danny]

I would have said yes. I would have broken immediately and give it to him.

[Brandon]

You can't say no.

[Kyle]

Oh, oh.

[Brandon]

What if he's like, you don't smoke, loser.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

You don't get extra jail for lying.

[Brandon]

Right. But that's like a.

[Donnie]

That might be an actual drive.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

That's perjury.

[Titus]

Probably. You missing this cup.

[Brandon]

Yeah, it's what a guy to guy situation. Like, if I say no, he's gonna be like, loser.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

I don't think he was testing your manhood or your coolness. Testing your coolness?

[Brandon]

Yeah, a little bit.

[Donnie]

That'd be scary.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

In, in the Duke Cannon's beard balm, like in the, in the depths of that smart.

[Danny]

Is it all gooey when you get.

[Donnie]

It's so goo.

[Brandon]

Yeah. I, I, I was more calm than I thought I would be. I think it's because I just was like, this would be an awesome story.

[Donnie]

Which is you in jail. Yeah.

[Brandon]

For like a day. Just A quick, quick came.

[Danny]

It would be so worth it.

[Titus]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brandon]

Like, I'm kind of pissed that I didn't.

[Danny]

Would you make your mug shot your profile picture?

[Brandon]

Yeah, I think you'd have to.

[Donnie]

If you got slapped in jail, would you like, still tell us?

[Brandon]

Yeah, for sure. If I kissed a dude in jail, I'd tell you guys.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Danny]

They held you for an hour and you already.

[Brandon]

I just walked in. I right, let's get this.

[Danny]

You were made a.

[Brandon]

Immediately I start making out in the guy comes like, hey, dude, you.

[Danny]

You don't even do.

[Donnie]

We're pending. We're processing there was still pro.

[Brandon]

You're going to be done with your paperwork in five minutes.

[Kyle]

Still got ink on your thumb.

[Brandon]

Start, start, start making a noose.

[Danny]

This is my life now. Yeah, you kill.

[Donnie]

Not even arrested.

[Brandon]

They're like, dude, what are you doing?

[Danny]

You're hanging before the mug shot.

[Brandon]

You're sitting in the lobby of the police it.

[Donnie]

We're just standing. You're in the lobby, dude, I'm doing.

[Brandon]

A rope in the lobby, taking off my shoelaces.

[Danny]

We were gonna ask you for US$800. You're in the process of killing yourself.

[Brandon]

Sitting next to a water cooler trying to hang myself.

[Donnie]

Killing yourself in the lobby next to a vending for a misdemeanor.

[Brandon]

Someone go, I'm hanging myself for my shoelaces while someone gets Doritos. Hey, don't do that, dude. Oh, but yeah. Missed you guys. Missed you guys a lot.

[Kyle]

I also.

[Danny]

I can't get over you. Just a dude. The lobby of the police station.

[Brandon]

I. I think Wednesday we should do our hate list because I had a lot of free time to let my mind wander and it's extensive.

[Danny]

So you had a nice vacation? You just thought about the things you hate?

[Brandon]

Yeah, well, I mean, they're all very inconsequential.

[Kyle]

Sure.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

But yeah, I think we should do it. Yeah, we should let other people in the office do it too. Yeah, I got some things.

[Donnie]

Yeah. Mine would expose me as just like a shitty dude.

[Brandon]

Yeah, I have a couple of those that, like, could for sure get me canceled, but I A lot of emergence.

[Donnie]

Too nitpicky.

[Kyle]

That's a long list, Dan.

[Danny]

Oh, my God. That's all you did?

[Brandon]

Yeah, I did a lot of.

[Danny]

Did it make you screw doing it or was it therapeutic?

[Brandon]

It was so therapeutic.

[Kyle]

Give me the seventh one off that list.

[Brandon]

Give a random 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Filling out forms beforehand.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Danny]

Beforehand. Beforehand.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Every time you go to the doctor or dentist, they're like, please fill out this form before you get there. And then you fill it out and then you get there. They're like, please fill out this.

[Titus]

You still have questions.

[Brandon]

I know you're going to make me fill out a form when I get there. I'm not filling it out beforehand.

[Danny]

Yeah, ate that.

[Brandon]

That's good, right?

[Kyle]

You're loaded. Yeah.

[Titus]

You.

[Mikey]

That.

[Brandon]

That was right above. That was brown rice. Hate brown rice. Garbage. It is garbage.

[Donnie]

You can't taste the difference.

[Titus]

No.

[Brandon]

Rice is perfect.

[Danny]

But you couldn't. A blind taste test. You can't tell.

[Brandon]

Yeah, you can't. It's like a little more grainy.

[Kyle]

I think you can taste the difference. Definitely on a white rice.

[Brandon]

You guys aren't fat enough to taste the difference. Brandon. I could definitely taste the difference.

[Kyle]

I. I know when brown rice is.

[Brandon]

Sneaking a little bit of health in it.

[Titus]

You're in brown, too.

[Kyle]

My radar goes up when brown.

[Brandon]

Oh, yeah.

[Danny]

Brown. White over brown.

[Titus]

You like white over brown rice is perfect.

[Brandon]

They've been eating it for.

[Mikey]

Billions.

[Donnie]

How long? How long have they been eating white rice?

[Mikey]

Since before floor.

[Brandon]

Millions of years.

[Kyle]

That's not millions, though.

[Brandon]

No.

[Kyle]

When did rice come out?

[Titus]

When was rice invented?

[Danny]

When it dropped, people lost their minds.

[Kyle]

People didn't come out till hundreds of thousands of years ago, right?

[Danny]

I think so.

[Kyle]

All right, so when do people drop?

[Donnie]

Oh, man.

[Danny]

As we know it.

[Brandon]

Do you know sharks are older than trees? All right.

[Donnie]

I saw the video.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

Sharks were the first that came out of the new drop.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Yeah. They're like the first thing.

[Donnie]

Holy.

[Mikey]

The oldest animal in the world. There's like this shark in Greenland that's like 300 years old.

[Kyle]

They're lying about that. No, I always see that shark's picture. It said it was born in 1626. How do we know? Miserable.

[Donnie]

How do you know the clam is the oldest. It was, oh, I think 500 years. 500 year old clam, ocean, cohog.

[Brandon]

Waist level bushes. I don't. I don't like them.

[Kyle]

Those aren't worth hating.

[Brandon]

I want a tall bush or a little kind of shrub.

[Kyle]

Those aren't worth hating.

[Brandon]

I hate them.

[Kyle]

Yeah, they've cleaned your house perfectly.

[Brandon]

No, I don't like waist level bushes. Them.

[Danny]

They're good for pushing your homie into.

[Brandon]

Yeah, but that's actually a scary thing where you walk by and you're like, I could get.

[Danny]

What was that trend called?

[Donnie]

Pushing it always.

[Brandon]

Oh, my God.

[Danny]

You got Kyle.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Remember that?

[Brandon]

I would get like, yeah, he's seriously.

[Kate]

Oh, I got you. I didn't try.

[Brandon]

When was that for you?

[Donnie]

He did.

[Brandon]

It was like 2006 for me.

[Danny]

I was in high school.

[Brandon]

You would get, like, it was actually.

[Kate]

Hurt going, when Bush was president.

[Danny]

Who's the president?

[Eddie]

Right?

[Brandon]

You just end up in a bush.

[Kate]

It's funny every time.

[Kyle]

That is so.

[Brandon]

Yeah. You guys gotta all get your hate list going.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Kyle]

All right, all right.

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[Brandon]

You got. You got a bunch, I'm sure.

[Kyle]

Yeah, I might just. Free ball. I've got enough sitting on the top of my head usually just to go.

[Brandon]

I sent you guys one. That was an interesting conversation at dinner with my wife because I was updating it as we were just going about vacation. No. No touch strip clubs. And then she was like, what do you mean? Like, they touch you? And I was like, both ways. You go to a strip club and they're like, no touching. It's like, what do I do?

[Danny]

Is that like all strip clubs?

[Kyle]

No, I've never. I've never been to a touching strip club.

[Donnie]

Yeah, I would prefer no touching.

[Danny]

Oh, yeah.

[Kyle]

I've only been to.

[Brandon]

You want.

[Danny]

You growled at K. Kyle, bro, you're a predator.

[Kyle]

You growled at Kyle.

[Brandon]

You growled.

[Kyle]

Back off, Kyle.

[Donnie]

At the concept of not reaching for a woman.

[Brandon]

You pay for the dance.

[Donnie]

That's a. I'd rather just be like.

[Brandon]

Hey, yeah, no, I'm not talking about like. Like, standing, like, in the. In the General population and like, grabbing out. That's not what I'm talking.

[Titus]

They let you touch back.

[Brandon]

Yeah, in some of them.

[Titus]

Yeah, I know.

[Brandon]

That was allowed in the good ones.

[Donnie]

Dude's like, reaching for it like they're gonna get a free T shirt.

[Brandon]

No, you get the dance and then you can.

[Kyle]

All right, so a lady's grinding on me and I'm. I'm. Am I cupping?

[Brandon]

You pay for the dance.

[Kyle]

Yeah, yeah, I'm cupping.

[Brandon]

You can.

[Kyle]

Does sound appealing.

[Danny]

Oh, I think I would want a strip club. Be as least touchy. Yeah, I'd want to pay the chicken. She shows me a picture of her tits on her. That would be the way.

[Donnie]

A private room, alone.

[Danny]

And then unlock your picture of me. Look at this. I would love that.

[Brandon]

Your favorite strip club is just Ryan Ro's Instagram.

[Danny]

When I saw that, I was like, this is. This is perfect.

[Brandon]

What a night out with the boys. What? So what did I miss? Besides charity case.

[TJ]

Z PETA's pants.

[Brandon]

Oh, yeah, I saw that.

[Danny]

That was damn near.

[Donnie]

It was unbelievable.

[Kyle]

The. The pee came squirting out where the zipper hole was.

[Brandon]

Oh, no.

[Danny]

What a stream to do that.

[Kyle]

It was unbelievable.

[Danny]

I don't know if my piss could break the. The teeth of a zipper.

[Brandon]

Sounds like the wet wheel was good.

[Danny]

It was funny.

[Kyle]

It was. Yeah. It. It.

[Brandon]

I don't know why it ain't coming out.

[Kyle]

It came out good.

[Mikey]

Waterfall sound.

[Brandon]

Actually, you know what?

[Mikey]

This trick really did this.

[Kyle]

And immediately.

[Brandon]

Yeah, so. So I went to boarding school for high school.

[Danny]

We used to do this all the time.

[Brandon]

You. If someone fell asleep, you just put their hand in water.

[Danny]

Yeah. But this much. And it was immediate.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

If you need a piss.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Danny]

The middle two fingers.

[Kyle]

And here we go.

[Brandon]

There we go. That's great. So.

[Kyle]

It's good peeing. Oh, man. Let's see. You missed a charity case.

[Danny]

Francis was here.

[Kyle]

Francis was here a couple days.

[Brandon]

Charity case.

[Kyle]

You didn't miss much. No, no.

[Danny]

It was a low key.

[Kyle]

We got wet and it ended up being pee.

[Brandon]

I missed you guys.

[Donnie]

I don't even remember how the charity case thing formulated.

[Danny]

It just happened.

[Kyle]

Francis and him were arguing and I tried to ask a question to articulate his. To let him articulate his side. He said. I said, as an outsider, Dante. And he said, no, you're a charity case. That's how it happened.

[Titus]

Was it relevant to the argument at all?

[Kyle]

No, I was simply going to say, as an outsider, why would you be the perfect person to talk to about the beginning of barstool? Because that's what he was. That's what was his case. And he didn't let me finish the question. He just headed me off a charity case.

[Danny]

There's so many things he could have called you. Yeah, that one doesn't fit you at all.

[Kyle]

And that one bothered me the most. So maybe it was good strategy on his part, because I was just. I was a mess for the next two days.

[Donnie]

Danny, thoughts?

[Kate]

He knew it would hurt you, and it did.

[Kyle]

Yeah, he landed a blow.

[Kate]

But he seems very apologetic.

[Kyle]

I had no. Okay.

[Brandon]

Oh, not at all.

[Kyle]

No. He hasn't said anything to me.

[Danny]

I think Deutsch dropped the most impressive video anybody's ever done.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

Unbelievable.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Donnie]

Film it.

[Brandon]

You got to film it.

[Titus]

Film it.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Danny]

That was you.

[Donnie]

I got one angle. Russian. I film. It was insane. It was insane.

[Danny]

Deutsch in the first try.

[Donnie]

He didn't.

[Danny]

Yeah. He's living in 2004 right now.

[Mikey]

Yep. By the way, he is, like, united. The dude squad here, they've been doing stuff all weekend, and every afternoon, I hear him making plans for the people to go to the bars. Like, he's. He's.

[Danny]

Yeah, by stuff. It's blacking out every night.

[Kyle]

So he's immediately the captain of the dudes.

[Mikey]

He's the captain of the dudes. They all went to the Family Guy bar the other night.

[Danny]

Oh, yeah, the Clam.

[Mikey]

They went to the. The. The Clam. Then they went out to other spots.

[Brandon]

They.

[Titus]

Oh, did he have to take it down because of Celine Dion? That was so perfect.

[Brandon]

Said that Deutsch just. Saturday morning at 10am was like, beautiful day. Let's go get some cold ones. And I was like, all right, cool. And then same thing Sunday morning. We can't do this. They seem like the boys had a great time out.

[Mikey]

Yep.

[Brandon]

They were just ripping up the town.

[Kyle]

Well, they got a new captain. Anytime the dudes get a new captain, that's time for celebration.

[Brandon]

But they also. White boy Rick said that Deutsch also just gets so drunk, he just goes mute.

[Danny]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Because also, guys just keep coming up to him, challenging him, and he doesn't. He doesn't turn him down.

[Kyle]

I mean, Deutsch isn't far from mute on a normal day. Yeah, he's not exactly, like, boisterous. He'll. He'll give you a little bit.

[Brandon]

He said, like, 10 dudes came up to him at the bar on Saturday and was like, chug off.

[Kate]

He.

[Brandon]

He will not.

[Titus]

He can't say no.

[Brandon]

He can't say no.

[Kyle]

But then he's Living that life a while.

[Brandon]

He was just done for the night.

[Titus]

Sleep it off.

[Donnie]

The best beer drinker in the world as we know it.

[Brandon]

Apparently Whitney said he's got a guy who can beat him. I was like bring him on.

[Donnie]

But the best as we know.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah. And I, I, I'll take any challengers.

[Titus]

But Deutsch swears that his tolerance for alcohol is not, not that impressive.

[Brandon]

Right.

[Titus]

As any said that before. He's like I can drink it fast but like I still get drunk. I still get pretty drunk.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

But like what is the tolerance expectations for six and 30 seconds.

[Danny]

Right.

[Titus]

But I, I, if people are coming up to him, challenging him. I could see him just getting blasted in the snap of a finger and then there goes his night. Now he's just gonna stare at his feet.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Titus]

The next three hours.

[Donnie]

I would like to know how he behaves like four hours in.

[Brandon]

I think just a quiet.

[Titus]

He needs like someone that he needs like a sidekick. That limits it to like one per 30 minutes or something is all you. You can't just be doing challenge after challenge rapid fire for his own.

[Donnie]

Yeah, we can't let him.

[Titus]

For longevity purposes. Yeah, we gotta.

[Donnie]

He's not a one term guy.

[Brandon]

I love seeing his debates with white boy Rick too where they were, I think they were debating top five point guards of all time and and what? And Deutsch was just like Chauncey Billups. He's like you don't know. You weren't, you weren't alive. It was different.

[Kyle]

It was so fun to say.

[Brandon]

But Chauncey Bells is a very fun one. Yeah.

[Kyle]

Like you don't even know dude.

[Brandon]

You have no idea. Special chance.

[Kyle]

And no matter what he says you don't even know. You don't even know.

[Donnie]

I don't know anything about basketball. That sounds funny.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Chauncey Billup, I mean he was a good point guard.

[Titus]

He was good.

[Brandon]

How's that top five point guard?

[Titus]

How's he doing by the way?

[Donnie]

Oh yeah.

[Brandon]

Oh yeah.

[Titus]

Remember that whole arrested. Oh yeah.

[Brandon]

He was the coach. The Blazers.

[Titus]

He sure was.

[Brandon]

And they got arrested.

[Titus]

Got arrested and hauled off gambling thing.

[Mikey]

Oh he was that guy.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

That was a big story.

[Mikey]

That was a huge story. 20 seconds and then now I don't know what happened.

[Danny]

Is there an update on that?

[Kyle]

I actually feel like every now and then we have these big stories of a guy getting popped for gambling in sports and there never is any follow up.

[Donnie]

We forget there's so much other.

[Brandon]

Yeah. It just happened.

[Titus]

Epstein files Michael Jordan grabbing ass.

[Danny]

Oh yeah, there's all sorts.

[Brandon]

He was grabbing his shirt.

[Danny]

That was weird.

[Kyle]

Is that what we're going.

[Brandon]

I think there was.

[Kyle]

I need to know what we're going.

[Brandon]

I think I'm going with. There was ice in the kid's shirt, and he was trying to get it out.

[Kyle]

Okay. Why would there Ice being.

[Brandon]

Yeah, the back of his shirt was celebrating.

[Danny]

Yeah, but I don't think you celebrate with ice.

[Brandon]

No, I think they were like, maybe dumped Gatorade or something.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Titus]

Yeah, that's.

[Brandon]

That one that tracks.

[Kyle]

And the ice stayed on his shirt.

[Brandon]

Inside of his shirt. And Michael George being. That's really good guy.

[Kyle]

Get out of his shirt.

[Titus]

I grabbed his eyes.

[Donnie]

Huge for LeBron fans.

[Brandon]

LeBron broke a record last night. He has the most All Star Game losses of anyone in the history of the All Star Game.

[Kyle]

But that's good.

[Brandon]

No, that's 11 losses.

[Kyle]

Means he's been in a ton of All Stars.

[Brandon]

Crazy. That's so much. So much losing in the All Star Game. Yeah.

[Danny]

But then Michael Jordan wiggled a boy's ass.

[Brandon]

He.

[Danny]

Relentless, relentless.

[Brandon]

Wiggle, grab.

[Mikey]

Shirt.

[Brandon]

That's his shirt. That's his shirt. That's his shirt.

[Danny]

That's like four too many grabs.

[Brandon]

Who's the boy?

[Donnie]

What a lucky boy.

[Danny]

Yeah, that's sick for the boy.

[Mikey]

So this was recent.

[Danny]

This was yesterday. That was the Daytona 500. His team won.

[Mikey]

Oh.

[Brandon]

Oh, no, no, it's his shirt.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Brandon]

He's just grabbing his shirt.

[Mikey]

I mean, he knew people were watching, so that's. Oh, oh.

[Kate]

Is he trying to get like a.

[Danny]

Stain out the leg?

[Mikey]

Has he made a statement yet? Like I was a piece of ice?

[Kyle]

No, no, it's Michael Jordan. America will. America will collectively agree to just move on and not worry about it, because it's Michael Jordan.

[Brandon]

But. Okay, so if you want to take the worst interpretation of it. Yeah, but don't you think that. And this is going to be a bad time to say this, but I actually do agree. Think this. Don't you think we've gotten a little too pedophile crazy? Like, everyone's a pedophile for everything. I saw someone in the comments being like, I wouldn't even grab my. My own son's shirt. Yeah, I would.

[Kyle]

Yeah, you can grab your son's shirt.

[Donnie]

It's getting. With the purity testing and pedophile policing is getting.

[Brandon]

Everyone's just looking for pedophiles everywhere, which, again, this sounds. Is a bad time to say this. Probably the worst time in history. Say that we're too, Too. We're too Pedophile crazy. But I do believe that everyone being like trying to accuse everyone of pedophilia is a little much.

[Titus]

Right, kp, once again, right in the frame.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Dude.

[Kate]

I don't even say cheese for awful announcing.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Am I crazy for. Did you guys get what I'm saying? I'm not saying that pedophilia is good. I'm saying that everyone. That's like an instant.

[Danny]

I think everybody, everything. I think people think there's more pedophiles than there are.

[Brandon]

Correct. And again, bad time to say it because there turns out there were more pedophiles than we.

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Then we found out everybody.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah. Found out pretty much every. Every elite rich person in America is a pedophile. We got that part.

[Donnie]

So that should be talked about more.

[Kyle]

Agreed.

[Brandon]

They're just all in it.

[Mikey]

It.

[Brandon]

They're all in it.

[Donnie]

Do you want to end the segment?

[Brandon]

Yes. No, I think we got a little bit more meat on.

[Kyle]

We have some juice. Yeah.

[Kate]

Little more.

[Brandon]

No, no, no, no.

[Mikey]

I went to the all women's sports bar Friday.

[Danny]

Back to pedophiles.

[Titus]

Back to the pedophile.

[Brandon]

Oh, wait, what did you guys watch?

[Mikey]

It was women's ice hockey was on and the WNBA all Stars was on and it was fun.

[Brandon]

That WNBA was not. You watched?

[TJ]

I don't know.

[Brandon]

I don't watch.

[Mikey]

This is my defense. I don't follow sports at all.

[Kyle]

Were you watching the celebrity game?

[TJ]

The unrivaled one on one?

[Mikey]

Yes, it was the unrivaled.

[Brandon]

Okay.

[Kyle]

All right.

[Brandon]

Because that would be funny if you went in. There was like nine month old all star old stuff.

[Mikey]

No, Olympics were on and then WNBA was on and the bar smelled amazing and the drinks were clean and they had a good system.

[Brandon]

Drinks were clean.

[Mikey]

The. The whole bar was clean like every. It was just nice to go into a sports bar and not be like wet bars.

[Danny]

How was the talent?

[Mikey]

Pretty good. I was sitting there after my second drink. I was like, am I.

[Brandon]

Were there dudes?

[Mikey]

Yeah, there was dudes who were handsome. There was like handsome dudes, huh? Yeah, it was mostly women, but there was definitely like, I'd say dudes a third dudes.

[Kyle]

Were the dudes gay or just dudes?

[Mikey]

Didn't see. People were having like Valentine's parties. There was like parties in the back. There was like. It seemed like a good. I was there kind of early. Seemed like people were like pre game in there before.

[Donnie]

Was it like one big community, everyone's interacting or kind of just like a regular bar with different. Different.

[Mikey]

Mostly Like a regular bar. But it was, like, nicer. Like, everybody was being nicer because it was, like, so packed. It was like. I was gonna say nut to butt, but I guess clam to jam.

[Kyle]

And the clientele was, like, attractive for softball players or.

[Mikey]

Yeah, there was hotties in there and everyone's beautiful in their own way, of course. But there was like a regular. What you see at a regular sports bar.

[Brandon]

Power lifters.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Catchers.

[Titus]

Were the women actually watching catchers? Yeah, Sports are waiting for the. The one on moment and then asking everyone to do chores around the house.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Swapping recipes.

[Mikey]

Anyway, babes in Logan Square. Highly recommend.

[Brandon]

Were the guys dressed as white nights.

[Danny]

Last lap of the Daytona 500. The toilet wasn't refilling.

[Titus]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mikey]

They had two openings in the bar with two little things. It was like, hey, don't clog this space whenever you need your drink. So everyone just waited politely in line. And it went so quick. Instead of like fighting for a space at the bar to get a drink when it's crowded, everyone.

[Kyle]

You're putting that on us.

[Mikey]

Everyone was polite and the drinks were good. Yeah, it was good. I was like, oh, this is nice. Bathroom is clean. It was just a treat.

[Brandon]

Was there a men's bathroom?

[Mikey]

I don't know.

[Kyle]

Did people there ever shut the up?

[Mikey]

We were. The hens were clucking. It was. We were clucking in there. We were chatting. No, it was good.

[Kyle]

All right, all right.

[Brandon]

We gotta send Highly recommend.

[Titus]

Yes, indeed.

[Mikey]

Yeah, he would be welcome. He would be welcome there for how long?

[Kate]

About a coyote in the hand.

[Mikey]

A sip.

[Kate]

Would it be appropriate? Like, were guys hitting on girls there?

[Donnie]

Guys even do that.

[Mikey]

Would go to an all women's sports.

[Donnie]

Bar and hit on to approach women.

[Danny]

I've never seen it happen in the wild.

[Mikey]

I can see guys coming with groups that were going already and, like, hitting it off with somebody.

[Danny]

But is that a red flag to you if a dude came to meet girls at the all women's sports bar?

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

Okay.

[Mikey]

Immediately. Yeah.

[Brandon]

2. They're probably are, like, going up to girls being like, I respect you too much to hit on you. And cats. They're hitting on them.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

Yeah, That's.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Danny]

It's the only bar I can go to.

[Mikey]

Yeah. It was cool. It was fun.

[Brandon]

Oh, we're finally. We're away from all those men.

[Danny]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Those guys saying, we're not like those other guys.

[Danny]

They need arrested.

[Mikey]

Got to leave my drink on the table to go to the bathroom.

[Danny]

A lesbian could still get you.

[Titus]

True.

[Mikey]

But I'M not hot enough.

[Kyle]

I agreed.

[Mikey]

Old mom.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

Highly recommend, though.

[Kyle]

Nasty.

[Mikey]

You gotta get there, Mark. Go watch some games.

[Titus]

I would love to.

[Danny]

Yeah, let's do a yak live there.

[Brandon]

They'll have us.

[Mikey]

Yeah, good ambiance.

[Kyle]

If they'll have us, they'll have us.

[Danny]

We'll do them.

[Kyle]

How long?

[Brandon]

Sure, they're big stoolies.

[Kyle]

Sounds like our clientele.

[Mikey]

They've been. I don't know how long they've been open. I think another one's opening up in your neighborhood up north somewhere.

[Kyle]

All right.

[Brandon]

Ladies, Ladies. Finally, a bar for women.

[Titus]

Sports.

[Danny]

What do you think it'll be next.

[Kyle]

Golf course.

[Brandon]

At the All Chicks Bar. They like. Women aren't even drinking and they're like, sorry, you can't drive home. Home. No, have to.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Can your drunk boyfriend please come meet you?

[Brandon]

Oh, man, we have fun.

[Danny]

That's at one of our expenses. It's gang up on her.

[Mikey]

I can't wait to be banned from there after this episode.

[Danny]

They just take your keys immediately.

[Brandon]

Hey, listen, if they watch this and get upset, just be like, maybe you should smile more.

[Mikey]

Yeah, yeah. Quit nagging me about this.

[Brandon]

Hit him with one of those. Oh, man.

[Kyle]

All right.

[Brandon]

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[Kate]

He's.

[Danny]

He's. I haven't seen it. He got shaved. He got his.

[Brandon]

I don't know if he got shaved yet, but, like, his fits his vibe.

[Danny]

He's having the time of his life.

[Kyle]

He didn't bring his wedding ring.

[Mikey]

Yeah, he had a paper one wrapped around his finger. This trip leading up to the transplants has looked incredible.

[Brandon]

Incredible.

[Mikey]

Like they're having the time of their lives.

[Brandon]

Look at that. And then I think he. Yeah. Do you think they know we're from America? Yeah. Most American guy ever.

[Mikey]

Them on the Boat with that dude playing the clarinet right in their faces to take their money away from them was very funny too. Jack McCarthy.

[TJ]

Mincy looks like for sure his up, right?

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

Bleeding show is.

[Mikey]

So Pat had a tweet that was like. They told us the one thing they drove into our heads more than anything was don't let anyone, no matter what, touch your. Touch the area with anything. And it's him getting.

[Brandon]

Oh, my God, a rag.

[Danny]

If you turn the audio on. He.

[Brandon]

He.

[Danny]

He put a towel over his head.

[Brandon]

You put a towel over you?

[Kyle]

Yeah, like. But I had it like.

[Danny]

Like, immediately.

[Mikey]

Oh, my God.

[Danny]

And I asked rude. It's like, hey, did you bleed like that? And he was like, no, not over it.

[Kyle]

Over it, but not. But not on it.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kyle]

But like, I was. I was just walking back and it started raining when I was walking back.

[Mikey]

Oh, they're not supposed to get it wet either.

[Kyle]

No, I just threw a towel.

[Danny]

Yeah, he's. He just can't be.

[Mikey]

Oh, my God. Yeah. Oh, my God. Makes me nervous.

[Danny]

It has, like, six months of pretty high.

[TJ]

Yeah, it's. It's.

[Danny]

It's gonna be bad.

[Mikey]

Have we seen anyone else? Look how swollen the top looks like.

[Danny]

A cartoon made by a hammer.

[Brandon]

A burrow. Oh, man.

[Mikey]

It's a Wiley Coyote bonk.

[Danny]

Doesn't.

[Titus]

Doesn't Deutsch have something like that going on?

[Danny]

Does Deutsche have a bump?

[Mikey]

I thought he.

[Titus]

I thought he showed a bump.

[Donnie]

He might as well.

[Danny]

He probably does.

[Mikey]

I also forgot certain people were going like. I was like, Mook and Pat. Yeah, I was kind of. That was Jiggly twerking his ass on the table. I saw that.

[Danny]

I guess it hurt him so bad, his ass just compulsively started twerking.

[Mikey]

I thought he was doing that to be funny. He was in tremendous pain. Well, good for them.

[Brandon]

I did laugh very hard. I know you guys talked about it, but the Mincy just deciding to pick out only Ryan Whitney.

[Danny]

Oh, yeah.

[Brandon]

Like, just so funny.

[Kyle]

You wanted him to get kidnapped by a cartel. Dave wanted him stabbed.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

And Whitney just thought he was.

[Eddie]

Just.

[Brandon]

Being like, what a burden to live with. That much.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Hating your heart.

[Danny]

I know. Donnie did a speech last year for the boys, and this year, White Sox Dave, it was his job to do a speech, and he was so nervous about it. He was typing and he was like, I'm nervous. I was like, dude, just write it down. Read it verbatim. And so I saw Pat on his story posted, White Sox Dave giving the speech, but with music over it. Because he didn't want to spoil it for the video. So I text him because I knew he was nervous. I said, did you do the speech? And White Sox Dave goes, duh. And I said, how'd it go? And he just responded. How did 911 go?

[Brandon]

Well, depending on which side. Yeah. Right.

[Danny]

So I don't know. I didn't elaborate. I didn't answer. But I got. Guess we have that to look forward to.

[Donnie]

Oh, brought the nation together.

[Mikey]

Do we have any clips of the boat with the clarinet with Corey getting. Oh, yeah, this is fake.

[Danny]

This is. This is the fake face.

[Brandon]

Yeah. You do know when he got the fake face out.

[Mikey]

Yep. That's rude. You got to humor the lady.

[Danny]

Oh, they take it moot.

[Kyle]

Robbed.

[Mikey]

These guys were going around, just literally, they would open their wallets, and these guys are like, just take the money out.

[Brandon]

Play. They're playing, like, in their face till they get a tip.

[Mikey]

Yes.

[Danny]

Get out of my face with that clarinet.

[Mikey]

And even still, it wasn't enough for this guy. It was the clarinet player. It was harassing him.

[Danny]

Clarinet's the worst instrument. Never sounds good.

[Donnie]

You're kind of right, I think.

[Brandon]

Yeah, you might be right.

[Kyle]

Not getting robbed today. Screaming. Not getting robbed today. Right in front of him is.

[Mikey]

Yeah, this is the one that.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Cory's just staying strong. Real strong.

[Danny]

Do they nudge his face?

[Mikey]

Yes. I'm not built for that.

[Brandon]

No.

[Kyle]

I crumble for clarinet or bald stole.

[Mikey]

Just somebody be like, give me money. If you.

[Titus]

They're on a boat too.

[Kyle]

You'd give them.

[Mikey]

You're stuck.

[Titus]

You're stuck.

[Mikey]

Very awkward jump off.

[Brandon]

Were people mad that you guys talked about Miny on the airplane?

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Why?

[Kyle]

I think people are just tired of Mitzi in general, or want to. Yeah, whatever.

[Brandon]

I guess I get that. Yeah. I. I can't. You can't. You just can't be mad about him. He just exists. He's never gonna get a raise, never gonna get a bonus. He's gonna just exist.

[Danny]

So when people, like, fucking sick still.

[Brandon]

Yeah, I know, but people are like, oh, how do you pay him? And not like, he just exists. And he does his job of just being an idiot.

[Kate]

It would have been negligent of us to not.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kate]

About that at all.

[Brandon]

He's a whack.

[Kate]

It was going viral.

[Brandon]

I was trying to explain to Whitney. I was like, dude, it's no different. Like, Howard Stern had the same. Like, you need the. The whack packers to make the whole thing.

[Donnie]

I'm telling you, he's got it, like in that sense.

[Kyle]

Right.

[Brandon]

One of the best.

[Donnie]

We'd be crazy to ignore it.

[Brandon]

Not only that, but he's got one of the best qualities ever in the fact that you can say the meanest thing to his face and he'll walk away being like, we're best friends.

[Donnie]

He's not improving or correcting.

[Danny]

He's getting worse.

[Brandon]

Yes.

[Donnie]

Which is awesome.

[Kyle]

Right?

[Brandon]

You'd like. If he. If he, like, became a better person, he then would have zero value.

[Danny]

But I think the over saturation is real.

[Brandon]

Yeah. That's fair. I mean, it was. It was a quick turnaround from. That's why I said, tate, don't go. Because a full week of him following Mincy around would probably have been too much.

[Danny]

And then as soon as it's full, he becomes fully aware. It's unwatchable.

[Brandon]

Yeah. But then you're like, oh, let's stop talking about. Then the guy. You wake up on a. On a Monday morning. His head's bleeding.

[Danny]

His head looks like a. His head looks like a penis. His head looks like a.

[Donnie]

We have to pretend and not acknowledge the dome on his head.

[Brandon]

The guy's not supposed to touch his head. It's bleeding and he's touching it like two seconds after surgery. That's insane.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Kate]

And we're not.

[Brandon]

Cuz he looks like he's a attitude error Wrestler bladed.

[Titus]

We have to.

[Donnie]

Giving us everything.

[Danny]

And also his transplant.

[Kate]

Yeah, like.

[Brandon]

But I had it like.

[Donnie]

Gushing blood.

[Titus]

Not typical.

[Brandon]

Two seconds after a transplant.

[TJ]

Like 30 of them have had this done over the last three years. He's the only one that's had this sort of reaction.

[Kyle]

Okay. Yeah.

[Brandon]

Looks like Joint the clown.

[Kate]

Something really bad is going to happen.

[Brandon]

To the hell in the cell.

[Danny]

He's gonna. It's gonna get to the point where they're gonna have to take off the top of his skull's brain.

[Kate]

He'll probably have to go back to turkey.

[Brandon]

Turkey. Oh.

[Kate]

Because there's no.

[Danny]

There's no way that looks bad immediately.

[Kyle]

You're right. It looks like he was talked on the top of the head by Wiley Coyote or something.

[Brandon]

They take off his skull and the. And the monkey with the symbols.

[Danny]

Yeah. Hey, man, we thought we were alone, right?

[Brandon]

That skull's back, dude.

[Kyle]

Oh, man.

[Brandon]

So. So half of them already went event today and then another half tomorrow. I think I Keep forgetting Jack McCarthy's getting his hair done.

[Mikey]

Yeah, I was surprised by that too.

[Brandon]

I feel like he does have, I think, a big no.

[Kyle]

Yeah, he's on the way.

[Donnie]

He's the guy who should be getting it. He's a forever active. Nice hair. Just a bad hairline.

[Mikey]

So.

[Donnie]

Yeah, fixes that. He's going to be amazing.

[Kyle]

Mook was the one that surprised me. I thought Mook had a head full of hair.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Mikey Betts.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Mikey Best was close.

[Titus]

Are they all shaving their head? Are they like, you have to. Eddie didn't though, right?

[Brandon]

I think he shaved.

[Kyle]

Eddie didn't get the full thing, did he? He got like the crown. Yeah.

[Titus]

Okay.

[Danny]

I think he was the only one that just be like. That was like, no, I'd rather not. And they're like, all right.

[Kyle]

Yeah, they do have that option though.

[Danny]

Yeah, maybe.

[Kate]

So at some point, Eddie might only have hair on his crown and not the front.

[Brandon]

Let's ask. Oh, yeah, see if he's here. I want to. I want to know how long because it does feel like it's pretty severe surgery.

[Kyle]

Well, they all came back. White Sox. David felt like there. There's.

[Danny]

Shake it like a salt shake.

[Kyle]

I don't earn myself some.

[Mikey]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Brandon]

Do they not like put them.

[Danny]

Look at that thing go. Oh, I'd be so pissed.

[Kyle]

What does he do?

[Brandon]

Wait. Yeah.

[Titus]

Why is he.

[Danny]

That'll be the last thing. The most pain I'm ever in at White Sox.

[Kyle]

Dave. White Sox.

[Brandon]

Dave's holding his legs down.

[TJ]

Oh, God.

[Brandon]

This is like. I do not.

[Titus]

This is the last thing I want to see.

[Danny]

Dr. Don and Dr. Doofy.

[Brandon]

White Socks Dave also thinking his internal alarm clock would work the face the other side of the world.

[Danny]

He never sets alarms, dude. Because his internal alarm clock's too good.

[Kyle]

Jet lag door opens and his eyes are crazy.

[Danny]

The room's a mess.

[Kyle]

He's panicked.

[Brandon]

Yeah. That's when cons calls him raccoon boy. That's. Those are the moments. You're like, yeah, that may be. Actually.

[Kate]

He's the biggest, like self proclaimed morning guy too.

[Kyle]

Like, he'll.

[Kate]

He'll brag about it. 6am today.

[Brandon]

Look at his face.

[Kyle]

What's going on?

[Brandon]

That's just. That's. He wasn't even close to packed. They were all in the van.

[Mikey]

Is he getting follow up stuff or he's just there.

[Brandon]

I think he's just there for support. He's there to hold Pat's ambassador. Eddie.

[Kyle]

What?

[Brandon]

We're talking about the hair transplants. What. What did you end up getting? Did you get. Have to shave your head?

[Eddie]

No, I did the sides, remember?

[Brandon]

Oh, that's right.

[Eddie]

A Peaky Blinder thing.

[Brandon]

Yeah. So how. How severe does the surgery Hurt?

[Eddie]

Yeah, the shots do.

[Brandon]

So Pat wasn't like freaking like, yeah, it was normal.

[Eddie]

I mean, he was like gyrating. He was vibrating.

[Brandon]

But he had White Sox Dave there.

[Eddie]

Yeah, true.

[Brandon]

How bad is it that Mincy's head was bleeding?

[Eddie]

I think a couple people were bleeding.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Eddie]

A couple people were leaking a little bit. So I don't think it's horrible. But I guess the. The procedure is all about how you heal. So that's not a good way to heal. So that's bad.

[Titus]

How. How long is the pain window open? Like the. The video of Pat? How long is he be enduring that and shaking his ass?

[Eddie]

It's a lot. So it's like, it's. It's. It's pretty much just the long shots that hurt.

[Donnie]

Like they.

[Danny]

They're big needles. Right.

[Mikey]

Is that to numb the head or.

[Kyle]

Yes.

[Mikey]

Okay. Okay.

[Eddie]

So to get numb, obviously you need those shots. Those shots are okay. Those shots are brutal.

[Kyle]

So.

[Eddie]

Yeah, the shots suck for sure. I don't. Everyone's different. Some people were like, yeah, that was fine. Some people were like, that was horrible. So Pat was just on the opposite end.

[Titus]

Damn.

[Eddie]

But yeah, that's.

[Brandon]

Looks like the boys are having a blast.

[Eddie]

I know. Do you see? I saw you just pull up. Dave is built an alarm clock.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Across the world. Jet lagged.

[Eddie]

Special dude.

[Brandon]

He's special. And he did look like raccoon boy there.

[Eddie]

Yeah, he did.

[Brandon]

Yeah, he did. That was a big time raccoon boy.

[Danny]

How serious is the upkeep post surgery? Like you have to be pretty. Pretty on.

[Eddie]

So it's like 14 days. You can't do caffeine, you can't sweat, you can't get it wet.

[Danny]

Nicotine?

[Eddie]

No nicotine. No coming like, no. Like, nothing.

[Danny]

How do you think mints will do?

[Kyle]

Could be me.

[Kate]

You should make him do us a Stella Blue.

[Mikey]

He already got it wet.

[Danny]

He already got it wet and touched it.

[Eddie]

Yeah, I think that's. That's gonna be a problem.

[Kate]

That's why he was bleeding.

[Eddie]

Yeah, that's me a problem.

[Danny]

Did yours bleed like that?

[Brandon]

No.

[TJ]

No, no.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Brandon]

But I didn't.

[Eddie]

I had the least amount of graphs. I only had like 3200 or something like that.

[Danny]

That sounds like a lot.

[Brandon]

Yeah. So 14 days. When. When do we say Mincy Ethan Pro Day is March 6th?

[TJ]

4Th.

[Kyle]

4Th.

[Brandon]

4Th. That's exactly 14 days.

[TJ]

Yeah, I think that was like.

[Titus]

Oh, by the way, I. I saw a video I want to add to the mix. Oh, you saw one, T.J. what? Oh, I thought someone said something Sorry. Water pouring championship. It looked perfect. It got. It got put into my feed.

[Brandon]

I like that where they do the drops.

[Titus]

They're. They're. They're blindfolded and they turn on the faucet and you have to fill up the cup to the.

[Danny]

The.

[Brandon]

I like that.

[Mikey]

I thought you're talking about the one where the cup's already full and you do both drop by drop. Yeah, yeah.

[Titus]

Try to find a video.

[Brandon]

I. I also have one. Do you guys. Do you guys follow the guy? Insane Shane. I don't know why, but he's like.

[Kyle]

It's.

[Brandon]

It's basically like early jackass. It's just him and his friends kicking the. Out of each other and they just play undodge ball where they're. You can't dodge and it's just like. Like three. Like two points for chest, three points for head, four points for. A nutshell.

[Donnie]

Reverse dodgeball.

[Brandon]

Yeah. They're just standing across from each other, throwing at each other.

[Kyle]

Ball.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

You have to get hit. That's how you get points.

[Titus]

You.

[Brandon]

You have to hit the other person to get points.

[Donnie]

I like the other way where you have to get it.

[Kyle]

Oh, okay.

[Brandon]

We do that too.

[Donnie]

We're not doing this.

[Brandon]

No, they're doing that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They just like play tackle football. It's like him, he's like a small guy and he's got two, like fat friends and they just play tackle football and he just gets his ass kicked. Oh, this is a perfect game.

[Danny]

The Germans and Japanese know how to do.

[TJ]

This is a show. I just want them to come here and host midsey and everyone that this schlagen star show does is. Is like perfect.

[Danny]

Give me the red guy.

[Donnie]

Can we get.

[Titus]

Show us how it's done.

[Danny]

That guy's in a dress.

[Brandon]

Do I have any pants on?

[Kyle]

Red has no pants on.

[Danny]

I like the no pants.

[Kyle]

Meta let it all free. Good lord.

[Danny]

He low key.

[TJ]

Has a me build.

[Kyle]

Oh, my God.

[TJ]

Red.

[Brandon]

That other dude had ass. You be red.

[Kate]

You win this.

[Donnie]

Feed the water.

[Kyle]

Oh, my God.

[TJ]

He's going to win. He's going to win.

[Danny]

You have so much time.

[Brandon]

No, no, no.

[Kyle]

Keep going. Keep going.

[Mikey]

It.

[Danny]

Stop.

[Kyle]

Oh, wow.

[Titus]

This guy's awful. Hate him. The guy walking around his room.

[Donnie]

Yeah, Nothing.

[Titus]

He's terrible. I want him on my hate list so I can put him on my hate list.

[Danny]

Just one half.

[Kyle]

Guys got a me build.

[Titus]

Just one half.

[Brandon]

Robert Duvall passed away.

[Kyle]

Oh, see, right after.

[Danny]

What do you mean by c Godfather?

[Donnie]

Oh, big events, like just.

[Mikey]

Oh, yeah.

[Donnie]

Foreshadowed in an hour when somebody eats a cactus.

[Mikey]

I can't picture what Robert.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

He was in the Godfather.

[Mikey]

Oh, this guy. He was in some big movies.

[Kyle]

Yeah, big time, big movies.

[Mikey]

Apocalypse Now.

[Kyle]

Yeah, sure.

[Danny]

How old was he?

[Brandon]

95.

[Mikey]

Oh, wow.

[Brandon]

Good. Okay.

[Kyle]

It's a good, good run.

[Brandon]

Kate, can I ask a question? I think you'll know how to answer.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Brandon]

Where's Savannah Guthrie's mom?

[Mikey]

So now I'm seeing all these theories that they're like. I'm not saying it's. This is alleged. This is not me. I'm seeing other people saying this. Is it an inside job?

[Brandon]

I've thought that from the beginning because.

[Mikey]

Now it's starting to get weird.

[Danny]

They found a glove.

[Brandon]

Well, and they also.

[Mikey]

That was somebody who worked on the scene left, they think.

[Brandon]

Was Savannah Guthrie on leave from the Today show?

[Mikey]

I don't know. I should know more about this. That's. He asked me about it the other day, too.

[Titus]

I think she did. I think she's supposed to be at the Olympics, but she was.

[Brandon]

No, I think she was on now. This is all from one tweet I saw that she was on leave before this happened.

[Titus]

Right.

[Brandon]

And the show was doing just fine without her.

[Kyle]

Oh.

[Mikey]

So she, like. See, I. I don't actually, in my heart, think it was an inside job because, I mean, like, how do you think you're gonna get away with it? But it is, like, crazy that they haven't found anything yet.

[Brandon]

Yeah. It's also nuts just watching, like, everyone, like, it is a sad story because it's most likely a elderly woman died in a potentially horrific way. And everyone just being like, oh, this is like a Netflix crime.

[Donnie]

They love it.

[Mikey]

It's pretty.

[Danny]

Like, we're way too quick. We're way too quick to those.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Is there a podcast about it yet?

[Brandon]

Probably. Probably. Probably way too quick to that. Yeah.

[Kyle]

Savannah Guthrie.

[Mikey]

Yes.

[Kyle]

She's famous.

[Mikey]

Yes.

[Brandon]

I didn't know that either.

[Kyle]

I thought she was just a random woman whose mother got kidnapped and it hit local news.

[Brandon]

She does.

[Donnie]

She's on the panels.

[Kyle]

Wow. Today's show.

[Mikey]

She's like, one of the biggest morning show people in circuit.

[Kyle]

Didn't know that.

[Mikey]

Yeah. You'd know her if you saw her, I'm sure.

[Kyle]

Huh.

[Mikey]

But the whole thing's weird. And even the guy with the mask, like, pretty noticeable eyes and teeth. Like, how nobody has come forward. Being like, I think I know who that is yet. Is weird.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

Then I don't know.

[Brandon]

Dante probably knows where she is.

[Danny]

Dante probably is on the case.

[Kate]

It was Bunker.

[Mikey]

Speaking of scandals, you see Somala Che made it over to the wine Reddit.

[Brandon]

Oh, what?

[Mikey]

First off, like him, they had to remove the post.

[Donnie]

Oh, controversial.

[Brandon]

Too hot.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Love that.

[Mikey]

Yep. Mine read it. Had a very active convo going.

[Kyle]

Now Wine Reddit seems like a big, big Reddit. Like sufferable.

[Mikey]

It was a picture of him dressed as a woman sipping a glass of wine. And it's Mrs. Doubtfire.

[Danny]

Hope it didn't ruin his vacation.

[Mikey]

I know.

[Kyle]

No, tell him when he gets back. We'll tell him next week. Yeah, I went. I went ice fishing on Saturday. I got out with the boys. My friend. My friend Scott from Antioch. His name's Scott.

[Danny]

Listen, man, I'm. Put that in the past.

[Kyle]

His name's just Scott.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Okay. Yeah.

[TJ]

So.

[Danny]

But who's that guy you brought with you today? Who's watching live right now?

[Kyle]

Well, he left. It was. That was Robbie. Robbie I met.

[Danny]

You just brought a friend to the office. He brought Robbie to the office today. Yeah, well, Robbie and his lovely wife.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Wendy. And they're.

[Danny]

You like Wendy?

[Kyle]

They're. Yeah, I like Wendy. They're Jim and Steve's guys. So I met him at Jim and Steve.

[Brandon]

So why is he not Jim and Steve?

[Kyle]

No, that's Robbie.

[Danny]

Robbie works at Jim and Steve?

[Kyle]

No, Robbie's a customer of Jim and Steve's. I'm a customer of Jim and Steve. We met as customers.

[Brandon]

Customers.

[Kyle]

And he said, one day, can I come see the office? And I said, yeah. And today was that day.

[Brandon]

Did you get anything in return?

[Danny]

That's what I'm thinking.

[Kyle]

I probably will eventually.

[Brandon]

Nice.

[Kyle]

But right now, no, he's.

[Danny]

What does Robbie have to offer you?

[Brandon]

Something from Jim and Steve.

[Kyle]

He spends more money than Brandon. I do. So. So. So we'll put that aside. Me and Scott went out. Scott? Yeah, Scott. Scott.

[Danny]

Just Scott.

[Kyle]

Great guy. Great guy.

[Brandon]

One or two tees?

[Kyle]

Two. I play golf with him in the. In the. In the winter. In the summer. But in the winter we go ice fishing. And we went ice fishing the other day, and I learned something. Ice fishing isn't fishing at all.

[Brandon]

No.

[Kyle]

It's just two dozen dudes around a shack drinking beer.

[Brandon]

It's hanging with the boys.

[Danny]

I was disappointed when I went.

[Kyle]

It's just hanging with the boys. We were surrounded by what they call tip ups, which are the flags. And if a fish gets on, the flag, tips up. None of them ever did. And there was a shed with three holes in it that we could fish in. Nobody ever did. They were simply out There drinking beer and whiskey and all sorts of things. There was a four wheeler on the ice that people would take around with. We hit golf balls on the ice. It was everything but fishing.

[Mikey]

Did you?

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Yourself, huh? Did you enjoy yourself?

[Kyle]

I did. I didn't stay long. I was sick Saturday, so I stayed for about two and a half, three hours and then I. I got out of there. But they were having a big time when I left.

[Brandon]

Yeah, I mean fishing, when you think about it, is. What's the act of fishing? It's casting the line. When you ice fish, you don't do that.

[Kyle]

Fishing's kind of just waiting.

[Brandon]

Right. But it's also, you know, throwing the line back and forth.

[Kyle]

Yeah, no, you don't do that.

[Brandon]

Put it in there and where you want to put it.

[Kyle]

Yeah. And it was. We had a good time. I just. It was. It was one of those days. I think it was perfect for ice fishing because the. The ice is 14 inches thick right now. Hasn't really started to melt, but it was 50 degrees outside. So it's comfortable to stand out there for day. Comfortable to be out there and you're not really in any danger.

[Brandon]

Might have been the best day.

[Kyle]

I would think so. There were a lot of people out there.

[Danny]

So can you. Can somebody be even be good at ice fishing?

[Kyle]

I bet there are people that. There was one guy in the group, cockering Charlie, whoever drinks most beers. Yeah, Cockering Charlie wasn't about the nonsense. He walked off apart from the group and was checking his stuff and being, you know, getting him some. Some lines in the water liners. Cockering his lines. She was eating.

[Danny]

It expands in the cold. Right? That would suck.

[Kyle]

Ring. Yeah, the cock.

[Danny]

The cock ring.

[Kyle]

Oh, I don't know.

[Brandon]

The cock.

[Danny]

The cock itself is smaller. The metal ring would get larger.

[Mikey]

No, but are both happening at the same time?

[Danny]

Metal get bigger or smaller in cold?

[Mikey]

Smaller.

[Danny]

Oh, okay.

[Kyle]

So that's fine. So everything shrinks the same.

[Brandon]

That would be funny if it just fell off and it just like, you know. Yeah. Oh, there's my ring.

[Danny]

Would you pick it up for him?

[Kyle]

Does it fall off or something? No, I wouldn't pick up.

[Donnie]

Dive in the water. Frozen water.

[Brandon]

What are you guys doing?

[Titus]

I got it.

[Donnie]

First ring you died saving your boy's.

[Danny]

Drown on the ice. What a way to go.

[Brandon]

Yeah, we just have to call a plumber.

[Danny]

I flush.

[Brandon]

My cock ring went down the drain. Did you get it? My diamond encrusted ring.

[Danny]

There's got to be some pricey ones.

[Brandon]

Oh yeah.

[Mikey]

Elton John.

[Kyle]

No, Got.

[Mikey]

I think for.

[Brandon]

Whoa. That's a up. Cock ring. All right, chill out.

[Mikey]

I think when Elton John got married, Eminem got him a diamond studded ring, like, kind of as a joke, but it was like a fancy.

[Danny]

Was his the one that you put on for the toy or was his the one that you put through the penis?

[Mikey]

Oh, put through the penis?

[Titus]

Yeah, like a Prince Albert.

[Kyle]

Prince. Oh.

[Mikey]

I think it was like a muzzle. Almost like.

[Danny]

Okay.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

I don't know.

[Kate]

Ellen John was Eminem's AA sponsor.

[Mikey]

Really? I thought that was very thoughtful.

[Kyle]

Is any of this real?

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Okay. He did get him a diamond and something like that.

[Mikey]

It was very fancy. Norton do what?

[TJ]

You said that on Graham Norton's show.

[Kyle]

Diamond encrusted adult toys, specifically rings.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Danny]

That's beautiful.

[Mikey]

How do you clean that?

[Danny]

I don't think you do. I think you kind of. It's like a cast iron.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Season it, don't wash it.

[Kyle]

No, you're gonna.

[Mikey]

I've been seasoning this forever. I watched Free solo again last night for the first time in, like a decade.

[Brandon]

So anxiety for you.

[Mikey]

Holy.

[Danny]

I can't watch this.

[Mikey]

Holy. I know how it ended, and I know I'd seen it before. I, like, was on the edge of my seat, couldn't believe that again, I was up for. It was like beasting before bed. I was up for it till midnight afterwards.

[Donnie]

It's the craziest feat ever, ever done on Crazy.

[Mikey]

And the one thing they didn't address in half the shots, even when he's training and while he's doing it, there's bees. You can see them on the screen. What happens if you're up there and you, like, stings you and you get attacked by bugs or bees or you probably die? Right?

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Not Honnold.

[Danny]

Not hard.

[Brandon]

I feel like. I feel like bees don't bother.

[Kyle]

Huh.

[Mikey]

I don't know. It's like a honey badger or something. But I.

[Titus]

It's so far up there, too. Like, see the visual of the tower that he climbed versus the El Capitan to hold either. That's insane.

[Mikey]

Well, there's somewhere. There's nothing underneath him. And he's just, like, holding off with his fingertips on the. I couldn't believe it.

[Titus]

I keep getting. I. I watched the Netflix thing for a little bit and then, I don't know, my phone was listening to me watch or something. I keep getting targeted ads for grip strength.

[Kyle]

Same.

[Titus]

And I want to talk to you two in particular.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Titus]

You both feel I. I live in this world.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Do I Need this. Yeah, I need to, like.

[Brandon]

Yes.

[Danny]

Kyle, you said it's like the biggest indicator of how health.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Titus]

I start getting like. But it's like clips of dudes, like, climbing with their.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Like the tips of their fingers. And they're like, do you wanted this? And I'm like, not really. And they're like, you're gonna want it. Did you see how you get it?

[Brandon]

Did you see the guy?

[Titus]

I do want it now.

[Brandon]

Who did it? He's like. He's basically like. His New Year's resolution is to get awesome grip strength. And now his hands sound like wood.

[Mikey]

He like dog medicine.

[Danny]

Wait, he has superpowers.

[TJ]

It's a different guy.

[Brandon]

Oh, that's a different guy.

[Danny]

That guy has superpowers now.

[Brandon]

Yeah. I think you need grip strength.

[Titus]

I feel the urge to just buy every single correct this and just sit there.

[Kyle]

Forearms.

[Brandon]

Yeah. I'm doub around to get in.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Yeah, let's do it.

[Mikey]

Well, that's how I'm just bringing in.

[Titus]

And I'm gonna just fidget with grippers.

[Mikey]

He gets to the top, and they're like, what are you gonna do the rest of the day? And he's like, I guess I'm gonna go work on my grip. And he goes to his van and he does his grip strength, actually.

[Brandon]

Oh, this guy's fingers.

[Titus]

That's crazy.

[TJ]

The dog medicine guy does have superpowers.

[Danny]

Yeah, you can levitate a little bit.

[Brandon]

Listen this. Listen to this.

[Danny]

God damn.

[Brandon]

That can't be good for you. I want that bad.

[Mikey]

That cannot be good.

[Brandon]

The problem is, Mark, every time I buy one of those, it's so much harder.

[Titus]

So hard.

[Brandon]

It's like, oh, squeeze like three times. Like, I'm such a.

[Titus]

It's awful.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah.

[Donnie]

I was told don't even bother with, like, the toys.

[Titus]

Oh, how do you do it then? Just rice hangs or hangs.

[Donnie]

Hanging and carrying.

[Brandon]

All right.

[Donnie]

Dumbbells.

[Mikey]

That's what Honald had in his van. He had this, like, little board with tiny little holes. And you would just. He would practice just, like, dangling on it.

[Donnie]

But there's like, there's infinite amount of things that can improve quality of life and longevity and infinite amount that can, like, destroy it. And we're kind of just trial and error. We have no idea. So it's like, what? Don't. Don't stress over.

[Brandon]

I'm about to start a fitness journey that's going to be the goofiest fitness journey ever. I don't know if you guys seen this. There's like a 10 minute workout that dudes are doing. That's like. It might be Turkish where just body movements. Have you seen these guys?

[Danny]

There's that one guy that jumps 100 times a day.

[Brandon]

Yeah, it's kind of like that. H. I'll try to find it. It's going to. It's going to suck to have.

[Titus]

Wait, does he like kind of. Yeah, like this?

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Titus]

I know what you're talking.

[Brandon]

He's lost like £20.

[Titus]

I know what you're talking about.

[Brandon]

Try to find him.

[Danny]

But is he also like eating? Just kind of running like he started maybe?

[Kyle]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brandon]

And then you're like, yeah, you do that. And then you're like.

[Danny]

I think the Chinese.

[Brandon]

That's the whole work.

[Danny]

Parks do that in the morning.

[Brandon]

Yeah, it might be Chinese. They're Brandon, do it. Do the Noble ad.

[Mikey]

Maybe Donnie was on to something.

[Brandon]

Hold on, I'm gonna find it.

[Titus]

I know exactly what you're talking about.

[Brandon]

It's gonna suck to do. I can't do it.

[Titus]

The guy looks awesome too.

[Brandon]

He looks so good. Go ahead, do it.

[Kyle]

Noble is a footwear brand. Milk for training. It is a brand for anyone who strives to be better every day with options across training and lifestyle. No Bull has options for everyone. It's a brand for anyone who wants to be a better version of themselves. Get stronger physically, mentally and emotionally. As you can see right there, Zaz holding his up. They don't over promise or under deliver. The shoes just feel great and hold up to any occasion. Not to mention, this is the same brand worn by Olympic athletes, NHL players and TB12 himself. We have. I have three pair of the no Bulls. They are. I wear them on the weekends to get out and about and get active. Make my calves look good. No big deal. I have great looking calves. Exclusively for the Yak listeners. No bull is offering 35% off your first order. Visit nobullproject.com use code yak for 35% off your first order. That's n O B U L L P R O j e c t.com use code YAK for 35% off. Once again, no bullproject.com, use code YAK 35% off your first order. I've been seeing this guy. This. This is the type. You want to do this with me?

[Brandon]

No, this is a regular dude. I don't know if you guys see.

[Kyle]

I do want to do it with you. This morning I walked two miles. I got here at 5 o'. Clock. I walked two miles because I Weighed in today. I am officially the biggest I've ever been. What?

[Brandon]

You.

[Danny]

How'd that happen?

[Kyle]

278.

[Brandon]

7.

[Kyle]

8 is what I weighed in this morning. That's the first time I've ever, ever I've ever been 278 in my life.

[Brandon]

If it makes you feel better. Well, I'm not 278. But I started my diet January 1st and I'm. I weighed in today five pounds heavier than January 1st.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

Do you feel a little bit of an urge since you're so close to just do this? Let me do 300.

[Brandon]

This is like 10 minutes a day.

[Kyle]

Oh, I haven't seen this.

[Brandon]

This is what I'm about to do.

[Titus]

This isn't the guy, but okay. Probably the same lymphatic hops.

[Brandon]

Yeah, it's the goofiest ever. Well, this is only day nine. He's already. This is a pin tweet. He's on.

[Kyle]

Like, none of this is a workout yet. I just.

[Titus]

Yeah, this is. This is the good.

[Brandon]

This is it right here. This is how you live to 100. Yep.

[Kyle]

Something. What's wrong with that?

[Brandon]

Oh, oh, that's just booty popping. Okay. Dead on. That's weird. That's the one. You can't.

[Kyle]

He's got weird arms.

[Danny]

Does he.

[Kyle]

Are they longer than his body?

[Brandon]

Wait, but show his updated one because I think he said he lost like. Yeah, there you go. Day 42.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Kyle]

All right.

[Brandon]

Yeah. He looks like he's in better shape, does he not?

[Kyle]

Way better shape.

[Brandon]

Yeah. So I'm gonna start doing this.

[Kyle]

This is all we gotta do.

[Brandon]

This is all we gotta do. Now, this is probably gonna suck, Brandon, because it's one of those trick ones.

[Kyle]

Where it's way worse than you think.

[Brandon]

You don't like it, Kyle? Look at that.

[Donnie]

It's if he's burning calories that way. But is that something you want to do every day? Walking on a treadmill?

[Kyle]

Nothing you have to do to work out is something I want to do every day.

[Brandon]

Correct. I want to find something that 10 minutes that I do it every day, I'll be jacked.

[Kyle]

Tiptoe arms.

[Donnie]

Just like three sets of lap pull downs, three sets of chest press, three sets of lat raises.

[Kyle]

Well, yeah, if you say it like that.

[Donnie]

Three sets of curls.

[Kyle]

Well, you keep adding three sets of something.

[Brandon]

Yeah, that was a lot of sets.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Every time I think you're done, you got another three sets. Oh, he's right, Peptides. Now you're sending a whole nother word.

[Brandon]

Steroids for 10 minutes a day, honestly. So yeah, torso reveal is going to be pushback. Okay.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Brandon]

It's gonna be a little bit.

[Danny]

278.

[Kyle]

278.

[Danny]

What's your NBA equivalent?

[Kyle]

Oh, I don't have one anymore. I think I'm past. I think my only equivalents are like out of, out of work tight ends.

[Brandon]

Are these Brandon, are these yours?

[Danny]

Do you feel worse?

[Brandon]

You've been having some Valentine's Day.

[Kyle]

I have felt. I felt big recently and that's why I did. I got here early. We weren't even supposed to get here early this morning because there's no wake up barstool this morning.

[Brandon]

Morning.

[Kyle]

And I got here about 5:30 and I said I'm gonna walk a mile. And I got through a mile and I said I'm gonna weigh myself. And I weighed myself and I was 278. So after walking and I said I'm gonna walk another mile. So now I gotta get sick because. Jesus Christ. 278. Yeah. 666-6-284 Zion.

[Mikey]

Well, these people are fit. You're fine.

[Kyle]

They're also. Most of these guys are 7 inches taller than me.

[Kate]

Well, has your slit gotten bigger?

[Brandon]

You're like Cleed el me.

[Kate]

Oh yeah.

[Danny]

It probably feels great.

[Kyle]

Yeah. But he's like six foot. No, I'm. I'm six five two. 78 is probably like Antonio Gates.

[Kate]

Can you do before pictures of just a slit?

[Kyle]

Why do you keep saying slit?

[Danny]

The one slit you have.

[Mikey]

Yeah. On your side.

[Brandon]

What do you call it?

[Danny]

Side thing.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Do y' all think that's a Jon Ham slit?

[Danny]

Oh yeah.

[Mikey]

Yes. Are your clothes fitting different? Are you starting to struggle?

[Kyle]

I'm. I, I've, I've my T shirts.

[Brandon]

That's the problem.

[Kyle]

I've been. I've been sitting home and T shirts. I'm like this just doesn't fit at all.

[Brandon]

It's. And we're in sweatshirt weather.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Noticed she hasn't said anything, but I'm pretty sure she has. Yeah. She, she, she, she. Yeah.

[Danny]

Valentine's Day weekend too. She must be 2D right now.

[Kyle]

She, she.

[Brandon]

Is she alive? Did you suffocate her?

[Kyle]

She's good.

[Brandon]

Are you on?

[Kyle]

She's good. She's. Everything's good. Everything's fine. 278.

[Danny]

Got to touch three. Touch three and come back.

[TJ]

So close.

[Brandon]

I put so close.

[Donnie]

I'm not that dude. You're close to 300. Like you're close to Wisconsin.

[Kyle]

It like now fun.

[Brandon]

Just commit to Cuz you know what it will Come off a lot easier.

[Kate]

Oh, yeah.

[Danny]

And it's much more inspiring. I used to weigh 300 pounds.

[Kyle]

I don't know that I wanted to. 20, putting on 22 pounds. A lot of weight.

[Mikey]

You could do it, T.J. can I ask what everyone else your most. What was you at your heaviest?

[TJ]

300.

[Mikey]

305. 305.

[Danny]

So that was, that was your eye openening number.

[TJ]

It was like becoming a health issue where, like, my body was rejecting food, which is interesting. Like, I like, go to a restaurant and then throw up after.

[Danny]

Oh.

[TJ]

He was like, you gotta chill.

[Mikey]

Well, it sounds like that's the answer. Then what?

[Kyle]

Start throwing up.

[Brandon]

And I want to see you at 300 so bad.

[TJ]

Touch three, Brandon.

[Titus]

Lose 100 pounds.

[Brandon]

Just kiss it.

[Danny]

Touch three, lose 100.

[Titus]

Touch three, lose 100. That's incredible.

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Titus]

What a story.

[Brandon]

Dubo's epic 300 to 200.

[Kyle]

Yeah. I don't know, man. Man, I just need to lose 20 pounds.

[Brandon]

Well, no need to gain 20 pounds then lose 40. But again, the, the, the first 20, you're gonna, you're gonna. If you get to 300, you'll lose like 10.

[Danny]

And that would probably fill you with motivation to lose the.

[Brandon]

You got to get fat to get skinny.

[Kyle]

I feel fat now.

[Brandon]

The way you said that was very fat.

[Danny]

I'll be, I'll be dead honest. You don't look it.

[Brandon]

Yeah, I don't think you look different.

[Kyle]

No. I don't know. It, it just, it. I think it was in San Francisco. I was, I was like looking. I was like, this is about as bad as I've gotten. What, Kate? What fucking what? Why are you looking up at the sky? You're trying to be nice to everybody in the world. You apologize, but with me, you're looking up the sky.

[Mikey]

You could see it in your face a little bit. Oh, your headphones are squishing your cheeks together.

[Danny]

You're too fat for your headphones.

[Brandon]

Headphones do look a little bit like a vice.

[Danny]

We need a larger size headphone that's.

[Mikey]

Gonna explode like a watermelon with those.

[Brandon]

That would be the eye opening moment.

[Danny]

My headphones don't fit anymore. Oh, that would be bad.

[Titus]

Brandon, have you ever broken a chair? You ever had like a moment like that?

[Kyle]

Yes. I've broken plastic chairs. I've broken lawn chairs. Was sitting in sand.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

At the beach. I've broken them.

[Brandon]

That's just a cost.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Is that as humiliating as it seems?

[Kyle]

It would be, yeah.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

You just kind of stare at the chair being like, what?

[Kyle]

Yeah, that's What's a chair malfunction?

[Brandon]

How could you betray.

[Danny]

If that's not instant anorexia, I don't know what is.

[Mikey]

Well, I feel like you guys get that how big dogs think they're smaller than they are. And you, you guys just plop on stuff, thinking you can plop. You have to ease yourself.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Even me, like, if I were to lose 30 pounds, I'm still big.

[Brandon]

You're big, big guy.

[Kyle]

I'd still be. If I lost 30 pounds, I'm 250. That's not small.

[Danny]

That ain't small.

[Kyle]

No. Just said that.

[Brandon]

What was 300?

[Danny]

What's for lunch today?

[Kyle]

I had just grilled nuggets with no sauce, no fries. Well, I, I, I. I took my wife to the side yesterday. I said, hey, will you start? Will you help me meal prep? Will you. Will you cook my meals and then prep them for me?

[Brandon]

The help is very funny there. And she said, help me meal prep?

[Kyle]

And she said, yes.

[Danny]

Yeah. What does she have?

[Brandon]

Will you meal prep?

[Kyle]

And she said, yes. And she prepped my meal for this morning, and I forgot it. And she said, do you want me to put it in your truck tonight? Because you're gonna forget it in the morning.

[Donnie]

Wow.

[Kyle]

I said. I said, I'm not gonna forget it.

[Brandon]

And put it in your mouth.

[Kyle]

I was insulted. I was like, I'm not gonna forget it. Just. And I forgot.

[Danny]

What was the meal?

[Kyle]

It was chicken and sweet potatoes. Yeah, chicken breast and sweet potatoes.

[Titus]

So it's her fault, really.

[Kyle]

It's her fault today. But, yeah. So I'm doing walking in the morning workout in the evening. Walking in the morning workout.

[Brandon]

Do your, do the. Let's do this thing together. Let's see how many.

[Kyle]

Are we sure this is gonna work?

[Titus]

They're hot.

[Brandon]

The guy lost.

[Titus]

There's another. I gotta find the guy that I see do it. He's jacked. Yeah, and ripped. Jacked and ripped.

[Danny]

Well, and ripped both.

[Kyle]

But that guy, just by doing this.

[Brandon]

That guy looks like us, and he lost 20 pounds in 40 days also.

[Kyle]

42 days, a long time.

[Brandon]

I understand, but all we got to do is look goofy for 10 minutes.

[Kyle]

You think me and you are gonna do something 42 days. Days in a row.

[Brandon]

Let's go do it right now. Let's go do it. Me and you, over on the.

[Kyle]

What if it just wears us the fuck out?

[Brandon]

Yeah, let's find out.

[Danny]

Then you'll quit?

[Brandon]

All right, well, I'm gonna take a piss. Let's figure out what the actual. What is it?

[Titus]

Called I gotta find this guy. Cuz I. Brandon, you'll think differently if you see a guy with a six pack doing it. You know, I think maybe that was part of the problem as you saw. Yeah, I just saw a dumpy guy doing it.

[Kate]

Come on, Brandon, we're all worried about you. Just do it.

[Kyle]

No, you're not, Danny. Yes I am. Yes I am.

[TJ]

I think what's really going to motivate some of the so called pathetic titans is if. If Frank starts catching up to people.

[Kyle]

I think Frank has caught.

[TJ]

He's closing in.

[Mikey]

I'm pretty sure he has.

[Kyle]

I think Frank might have passed.

[Danny]

He's under three.

[TJ]

I think he's at like 285.

[Mikey]

Go meet him at there and then. And then we're go with him. Come with him.

[Danny]

If a man named the Tank is less than you.

[Kyle]

Yeah, yeah, but I mean it. His first name was Frank. I mean the Tank was easy to put.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Like he's. He's not like Billy the Tank, right? Or Chester the Tank.

[Danny]

What would your.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Danny]

What rhymes with Brandon the Walker, the. There's nothing.

[Kyle]

Nothing.

[Kate]

Stalker.

[Danny]

Walker the stalker.

[Kyle]

Well that doesn't even make sense. Yeah. How about this guy?

[Brandon]

That's.

[Danny]

He's in good shape.

[Brandon]

Monks call these exercises the key to healthy longevity.

[Kyle]

One minute of that.

[Mikey]

See our monks really doing this?

[Danny]

I think so.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

I think people just use monks. For example, Joint recovery begins.

[Danny]

Is a monk a life you'd want though?

[Mikey]

No, not.

[Kyle]

Not me. I gotta get knee deep in that toxic.

[Titus]

You're.

[Danny]

You're obsessed. You're crazed.

[Kyle]

I got to get knee deep in it. I can't be away from a longer than like three months.

[Danny]

Damn. God damn.

[Mikey]

That's cool as hell.

[Titus]

Yeah. This is the guy. This is the guy I see. Yeah. Look at this guy.

[Kyle]

This guy.

[Titus]

Look at this guy.

[Kyle]

This guy's way better.

[Danny]

And that's all he does.

[Kyle]

That's the guy I see all this guy does.

[Titus]

That's all he. He goes to the beach every day, Brandon, and just does this.

[Kyle]

Look at this guy. No way. This is all this guy does.

[Titus]

That's what he says.

[Kyle]

You don't get traps like that doing.

[Mikey]

Doing this Chinese gymnastics.

[Donnie]

I'm deeply saddened by like the amount of middle aged midwestern dudes and women who are gonna do this.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

And they're gonna get to day 40.

[Kyle]

And they're still gonna be.

[Danny]

They're going to be a little red.

[Titus]

Hold up a picture of that guy. Hold up a picture of them.

[Donnie]

They're gonna be better at dancing Eat like a dog.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

7:30, 8 o'. Clock.

[Danny]

Oh, he's fasting.

[Brandon]

So this is exactly how I structure pretty much every day of my life.

[TJ]

I'd say at least 80, 90% of.

[Brandon]

My days in and out, I follow that fasted window.

[Mikey]

But is that a fun way to live? Like, are you enjoying life?

[Brandon]

First intake of food is. Could be around 2, 3 o'. Clock. Anytime in there.

[Mikey]

Like, I'm not dating a guy like this.

[Brandon]

Normal workout schedule. Meditation, breathing, everything else always on a fasted state.

[Titus]

Are you taking notes?

[Brandon]

Find that that allows me to be the most mentally sharp and my energy is super optimized.

[Mikey]

I bet it's chick fil a order about to arrive.

[Brandon]

There's grilled nuggets, is eggs and avocados. This is six eggs and one avocado.

[Mikey]

Six eggs.

[TJ]

Okay. Mr. Fart.

[Mikey]

Pretty much, yeah.

[Danny]

He's got a fart. So much.

[Kyle]

Mr. Fart.

[Mikey]

Do you follow that really thick guy with the huge L lips who like, is like, let's find protein at the airport?

[Brandon]

No, no.

[Mikey]

Okay. He kind of looks like a younger Brandon. If Brandon was like, ripped and got a ton of Botox.

[Titus]

Dan, I found my guy. Yeah, Dan.

[Kyle]

His Dan. His guy is crazy.

[Brandon]

This is. This is way more than I thought.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Wait, do you see his guy?

[Titus]

Look at this guy. This is the guy that I get. It gets thrown into my algorithm all the time.

[Kate]

You could look like this.

[Mikey]

Oh, oh, he has a friend doing.

[Kyle]

Ain't no way.

[Brandon]

Yeah. No, this is the same workout. Wait, how many. How many are there? How many workouts? How many movements you have to do?

[Mikey]

Or a reverse 6.

[Titus]

This is all he does, by the way.

[Mikey]

He's flopping around in there, like.

[Brandon]

But he was jacked before.

[Kyle]

This has to be.

[Brandon]

We need to do the one where the guy is fat and then he becomes.

[Kate]

This is for like, mental purposes, right?

[Titus]

And could not well, go try it. Everyone's. Brandon, you have to go try it. The monks were doing it.

[Brandon]

All right, I got. I got the whole list. The is this guy while you're flying.

[Mikey]

This is the guy I'm talking about.

[Kyle]

That guy's terrible looking. This guy's just you.

[Brandon]

The most amount of protein.

[Mikey]

This is you if you're fit.

[Kyle]

No, it isn't. What's wrong with this upper lip?

[Brandon]

16. 16 minutes. Now that I blew my life saving on this protein, it's time to eat some more. Most of these places just have high calories.

[Mikey]

I love this guy. He's got a good vibe.

[Danny]

Why would you want to look like.

[Mikey]

That he's very positive.

[Brandon]

Jesus Christ.

[Kyle]

I'd rather doing numbies.

[Titus]

You said he looks.

[Brandon]

Yeah, he is.

[Mikey]

I'm a little obsessed with him.

[Danny]

Oh, my God.

[Titus]

And you said he looks exactly like Brandon.

[Mikey]

If. If Brandon gets fit, that's. And you got little lips.

[Kyle]

You think that's the next stop. Fat to fit. It turns into that.

[Mikey]

Something to work towards.

[Brandon]

I'm doing the. I'm doing the. The workout. Do it like I'm gonna start doing it.

[Kyle]

What time? 9am tomorrow. I'll do it with you.

[Brandon]

All right. Be done. We'll do all 16.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Titus]

Am I falling into that trap with the grip stuff? If I work on my grip, am I one of the people that believes that? I'm looking at these guys that are knocking their fingers together.

[Brandon]

We should have rice.

[Donnie]

This happens to me every year. And then it becomes. Oh, yeah, we actually don't know. There's no scientific evidence. Yeah, we just think.

[Brandon]

And then.

[Titus]

I know what I'm doing is not working, but I don't know what to do.

[Brandon]

We should get a rice bucket in here.

[Donnie]

Whatever.

[Brandon]

We should have rice buckets kind of everywhere in the office.

[Titus]

Just. Yeah, we're always rice bucks.

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Just anywhere you sit.

[Titus]

There's a rice bucket right now, as we're doing the show. Just.

[Mikey]

Yeah, yeah. Isn't that sound. Just calluses on their fingertips, though? It's not strength.

[Brandon]

Rice bucket Friday.

[Danny]

TJ and I brought it up. You guys saw the dog medicine guy, right?

[Brandon]

No.

[Mikey]

Oh, yeah.

[Danny]

He's praying dog paw medicine on his hands to toughen him up. And now he can levitate aluminum foil?

[Kyle]

No.

[Brandon]

He can.

[Danny]

Yes.

[Donnie]

Oh, really?

[Danny]

Yeah.

[Titus]

That's.

[Donnie]

That's a better goal than just being a little strong.

[Danny]

He was doing it to toughen up his hands.

[Kyle]

But why would you want to levitate aluminum for.

[Titus]

Yeah, I want.

[Kyle]

That.

[Kate]

Wants to be there.

[Danny]

Yeah. He could just levitate foil. Now, that's cooler than a six pack.

[Brandon]

I've heard a lot of great appliances opinions so far. The first reason, of course, is the.

[Titus]

Dog medicine could have given me superpowers.

[Brandon]

Are my hands so dry that they generate large amounts of electricity? Is it a performative? Logical explanation. Putting myself in your perspective, that's probably the one I'd pick. Or is it cgi?

[Kyle]

Well, stick around.

[Danny]

But he's been. How long has he been spraying 820 days of dog medicine on his hands?

[TJ]

And he doesn't really have. He just wants to have tougher hands. But now he has super superpowers.

[Brandon]

That's a. That's a Good goal control.

[Danny]

Little pieces of foil and quinoa.

[Brandon]

Oh, he's still fat.

[Kyle]

Is somebody out there doing. Doing.

[TJ]

He lost like £250.

[Brandon]

Oh, he's not fat.

[TJ]

Yeah, he. He's still big, but he lost like. He was like gigantic.

[Brandon]

Just from the dog medicine?

[TJ]

I think so, yeah.

[Brandon]

What?

[TJ]

No.

[Kyle]

Oh. Is somebody out there doing every single activity you can think of once a day for the Internet?

[Titus]

Yeah.

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

They find something crazy, unique, obscure, and then they're stuck in this cycle of having to do it every single day to feed their algorithm.

[Kyle]

Like I'm getting a paper cut on my finger every day for the next 300.

[Mikey]

I follow guy who stands on two tables and dangles something different off his wiener every day.

[Kyle]

Why do you follow that guy, Kate?

[Mikey]

Somebody. People send me fellas all the time now. I'm sure it happens to you guys as well. And for whatever reason I was like, thanks for that. And now I see him every day. I'm like, go.

[Kyle]

You pressed follow on the wiener dangler?

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[TJ]

There's a Chicago paper airplane guy that's going.

[Brandon]

I love that guy. That guy, he throws paper airplanes out of his apartment.

[Mikey]

He goes to different. I think his friends all live in like. He goes to different high areas.

[Brandon]

Look at this. This one was sick.

[Mikey]

And every now and then they just go forever.

[Danny]

That was going quick. We should have him come here littering.

[Brandon]

Yeah, we should have.

[Danny]

Yeah, we should get him arrested. How it going?

[Brandon]

It would be funny if it caused the car crash.

[Danny]

Oh yeah, he causes a death.

[Mikey]

Take somebody's eye out.

[TJ]

Dm, if you want me to throw from your building.

[Danny]

Oh, he's staying anonymous though.

[Kate]

This will ruin him at his day job.

[Titus]

Watch we sling this piss bomb.

[Kyle]

Oh, that one didn't good.

[Brandon]

It's coming back. There it is.

[Kyle]

That was just in the wind. Where else would it go? Well, I mean, some of them just fly majestically.

[Danny]

Yeah, I don't think. That one's not a product of the.

[Mikey]

Craftsmanship catching its flight.

[Danny]

That's pretty cool.

[Brandon]

All right, so Brandon, Tomorrow morning at 9am we gotta. We gotta have someone.

[Titus]

Wait a second, hold on, hold up. Holy.

[Mikey]

See this one Turkey speech. Oh my God.

[Titus]

Wait a second.

[Brandon]

We gotta have someone video it and then we'll.

[Kyle]

Yeah, Cody will be here. Cody, you'll be here.

[Brandon]

And then he can edit it and then we just have to. Yeah. Cuz then when we post it, we're like, well, this is our locked in.

[Kyle]

We do it every day.

[Brandon]

I was gonna do it tonight, but you want me to save it for Tomorrow, first one.

[Kyle]

You gonna do it right after the air?

[Brandon]

Well, no, I was gonna do.

[Kyle]

Okay, we'll do it in the morning.

[Brandon]

Or do you want me to do one tonight so that I can figure out how hard it is?

[Kyle]

No, let's figure it out.

[Titus]

How long. How long are you playing it for? Like 10 minutes?

[Brandon]

16 minutes.

[Mikey]

16.

[Titus]

16 minutes, 16 workouts outs, one minute each. 16. That's easy.

[Donnie]

We need.

[Titus]

Get a.

[Brandon]

Get a timer.

[Kyle]

There were 16 of them.

[Brandon]

We need to get a timer.

[Kyle]

Okay. All right.

[Titus]

But they're all easy. It's like just kind of.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

The one that's going to be tough is.

[Kyle]

What was it?

[Brandon]

I. I just wrote them all down.

[Titus]

You're not doing burpees?

[Kyle]

You don't know that.

[Titus]

You should do burpees.

[Brandon]

Wide arm step backs is going to.

[Kyle]

Be a tough one. Wide arm step backs. Wide or white? Oh, wide. Okay, go.

[Danny]

That's the tough one.

[Kyle]

Brutal for a minute.

[Brandon]

Me and Brandon doing that. Yes, that would be the tough one. Yeah, that one's gonna be.

[Titus]

I want KB to do it and see if he breathes heavy at all.

[Brandon]

There's push ups.

[Titus]

Sweat. Do you sweat?

[Mikey]

I can't.

[Donnie]

This is. That would, like, get people to fall for it. In like, the 1300s, the guys lost £20.

[Kyle]

KB but we're dumber than we were in the 1300s.

[Donnie]

We are. Mm.

[Brandon]

And listen, the alternative is, like, eating right and actually going to the gym. We have to find the shortcut.

[Titus]

Mm.

[Mikey]

I know the statues had abs. Like, if you go to the basilica or whatever and the statues are ripped. But they didn't have gyms, so how are they getting that?

[Kyle]

Well, they didn't. They weren't filled with the. We eat either.

[Danny]

And everything was, like, made of marble. Everything. You just had to move stones all the time.

[Mikey]

True.

[Kyle]

What? Dan, why not just steroids?

[Donnie]

Yeah, everyone's doing steroids.

[Brandon]

Don't want to die.

[Donnie]

Everyone's doing peptides.

[Danny]

Everybody's doing.

[Donnie]

There's a peptide called, like, Rhett that will make you skinnier. It'll give you a jawline. But I also peptide called glow that will make you tan.

[Brandon]

That's the. There's definitely a point where it's like, I don't. I don't. I don't want to. I don't want to die young because I was trying to, like, I don't actually care about how I look.

[Kyle]

It's too late for either of us to die young.

[Danny]

Oh, yeah, it is.

[Brandon]

No, we'd still be classified as dying young.

[Danny]

I don't know I'd ask if, like, I don't know if I'd ask what happened.

[Donnie]

But.

[Brandon]

We got this, Brandon. It's our fitness journey.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Together 16 minutes a day.

[Kyle]

We got it.

[Titus]

It.

[Danny]

Do you have any desire to, like, be hotter, though?

[Kyle]

No, I need to. I need to way less. It's.

[Brandon]

You're. You. We're in the same spot.

[Kyle]

Yeah, we are.

[Mikey]

What?

[Brandon]

We are.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

We look how we look.

[Kyle]

Never going to be hot.

[Brandon]

We still get laid all the time. Oh, some of the time.

[Kyle]

All the.

[Brandon]

Some of the time. And all that we care about is energy.

[Kyle]

Yes.

[Brandon]

I just want to feel.

[Danny]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

I want to feel energetic.

[Kyle]

I want to be able to get up, right?

[Brandon]

Yeah. Whoa.

[Kyle]

Get up? Not.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Can you get up without. You.

[Danny]

Can you get up without using your hands?

[Kyle]

Yes.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

I'm not going to right now, but I could.

[Danny]

I believe you.

[Brandon]

I just have to close my eyes.

[Danny]

What?

[Brandon]

I was talking about getting a boner.

[Kyle]

Oh.

[Danny]

Oh.

[Brandon]

If I just got one. Right. Hold on, guys. Give me a second.

[Danny]

Pretend you're getting arrested.

[Kate]

Kate, leave the room for a second.

[TJ]

That.

[Kate]

Would you ever consider the big O?

[Brandon]

No, no, no. Energy. Cuz the energy part, it's. Yeah, I need energy. That's all I want is energy.

[Danny]

I think you just got to get.

[Brandon]

On testosterone and maybe like speed.

[Kyle]

All somebody has to do like me is just. Just walk a couple miles.

[Brandon]

That's what I'm saying. This. This thing is.

[Danny]

I mean, like, are you guys sleeping?

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

A lot.

[Brandon]

Well, I got my. I got my Donnie glasses. I fall asleep. I get knocked out now with.

[TJ]

Actually.

[Brandon]

Yes. It's crazy. The blue light glasses work. Donnie. What. What are you looking at me for?

[Kate]

Was your problem before? Like it wasn't dark enough in your room or is it like a mental thing where.

[Brandon]

I don't know, but I just put them on and within 20 minutes I'm tired.

[Kate]

I got to see it to believe it.

[Kyle]

I don't believe that.

[Mikey]

Go over to his house tonight.

[Danny]

Watch him sleep.

[Mikey]

Watch him.

[Kyle]

Oh, I have been.

[Brandon]

Tj, have you been watching Beast Game?

[TJ]

I watched the first like three episodes. I'm on the Survivor episode now.

[Brandon]

Oh, it's good. I want to talk to you about it, but it's just like.

[TJ]

It's so much.

[Brandon]

I know.

[TJ]

Like every. Every 10 seconds.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[TJ]

It's like the biggest decision possible.

[Brandon]

I like that.

[TJ]

It's a max overload.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[TJ]

There's no build up. It's all payoff.

[Brandon]

It's just every single moment is like, holy. How they can get out of this.

[TJ]

Every scene Is like, this changes everything, huh?

[Brandon]

Yeah, that's what I like.

[Kyle]

He also.

[Brandon]

It's. It's constantly.

[TJ]

That Beast is constantly verbally reassuring the audience that this is the big. Like, they keep being like, I can't believe how important this moment is.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Audience.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[TJ]

You gotta watch right now. Like, pay attention now. It's almost like he's assuming that you're on your phone being like, oh, oh, whoa.

[Brandon]

Like, like, no. Beast Games is the only thing I don't have my phone out during.

[Danny]

I got hooked on the JFK junior Show.

[Brandon]

Wait, so you're on him now?

[TJ]

It's good.

[Danny]

What?

[Brandon]

Like, remember we talked about him a few months ago?

[Danny]

No.

[Brandon]

How he was, like, the hottest bachelor of all time.

[Kate]

It was like.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Danny]

And all the whole show is him walking around New York being hot.

[Brandon]

Correct.

[Danny]

With a backwards kangle and wheeling his bike.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Danny]

We had called Love Story. No.

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Danny]

No, know. It's like a script. He died.

[Mikey]

He. The plane crash. What? Yeah, he. He was with her. Oh, I'm so dumb. I'm like, big guy.

[Kyle]

Oh, no.

[Danny]

I didn't want to have to break.

[Brandon]

God damn it.

[Mikey]

I was wondering why my entire timeline on all social media right now is, like, old photos of the actual couple around. I was like, why is everyone posting them? That's because of the show.

[Brandon]

And I got in the algorithm, and it's like he just was walking around New York City with, like, a Saab and a kayak on top of top, biking around with a backwards kangle and being the coolest guy ever.

[Danny]

Chain wallet.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

And then perfect girl.

[Danny]

She was cool.

[Brandon]

Perfect hair on his chest.

[Danny]

A perfect amount. He was all. He was playing football in Central park.

[Brandon]

With, like, every Sunday. Yep.

[Danny]

But, like, all American. I love the show. It's entertaining, but I don't know why I like it.

[Brandon]

What, is it on Hulu? Okay, I'm gonna watch it.

[Titus]

Is there, like, a narrative to it, or is it videos of him?

[Danny]

No, it's like. It's. It's actors. Oh.

[Brandon]

It's scripted.

[Danny]

It's like him dating this girl leading up to their demise.

[TJ]

Oh, did you watch the Menendez brothers?

[Brandon]

Yes.

[TJ]

It's the same guy that made that.

[Danny]

Ah, but that's, like, similar.

[TJ]

Similarly. Drama. Dramatiza.

[Danny]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

Is it showing how much they fought, though? Because I'm seeing the real photos of them. Like, they would just be in the middle Central park surrounded by people, like, screaming at each other until they cried. And, like, they would take their rings off.

[Brandon]

That's a good old toxic relationship.

[Titus]

So hot.

[Kyle]

So Hot sex.

[Danny]

The first episode. He kind of blames her. Like, she's an hour late to the plane and he's not licensed to fly at night. And that's how they die.

[Mikey]

Oh.

[Brandon]

And so, yeah, Fog got him.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

And her sister was on board, too.

[Titus]

Fog got Kobe, too.

[Brandon]

Got Kobe as well. Yeah.

[Mikey]

We aren't mad enough at fog, are we? I feel like we should be a little.

[Brandon]

Fog is kind of up. It just rolls on in. But it'll burn off.

[Kyle]

Off.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Danny]

It's just a tough word to yell with hate.

[Kyle]

It'll burn off.

[Titus]

I love the afternoon.

[Brandon]

Don't worry. It'll burn off.

[Mikey]

They were super hot. I was looking at the photos of, like, the real old photos of them on a boat together.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

He was just like the man.

[Mikey]

Yep. He had a backwards hat on.

[Danny]

They made his dick so big.

[Brandon]

He loved hats.

[Danny]

Him.

[Brandon]

A hat connoisseur.

[Danny]

Him changing in the. Look at that dressing room in the show.

[Brandon]

How cool.

[Danny]

Comical penis.

[Brandon]

Look at that.

[Mikey]

With a suit with a backwards hat. Come on. And a bike.

[Brandon]

The all American man.

[Danny]

He's just trying to get his magazine George off the ground.

[Brandon]

Look at that guy. That's just him walking.

[Donnie]

That's actually.

[Brandon]

Yeah, that's actually him.

[Mikey]

He's got a camera, two dogs, biking.

[Titus]

Hold on.

[Brandon]

Look how fashionable he is. Yeah.

[Titus]

Is that replicable? Could. Could we wear that?

[Brandon]

No. You could. Me?

[Titus]

I don't know.

[Danny]

I think anybody would get made fun of.

[Titus]

Yeah, Right. It's just that he's JFK. JFK Jr.

[Mikey]

I would say wealthy and hot.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Yeah. That the level.

[Titus]

We're in a suit with a backwards baseball hat.

[Brandon]

I'd say Anyone. Anyone who pulls off a Kangle. That means they're just hotter than the K. Yeah.

[Kyle]

Or black.

[Mikey]

Black.

[Danny]

Or black.

[Brandon]

Black. Yeah.

[Kyle]

They can. Yeah.

[Titus]

If someone showed up to this office in a full business suit with a backwards baseball cap on, we'd assume they're bald. Yeah.

[Mikey]

Who's the comedian, George? You'll know who it is. He only wears Wallace. George Wallace. He's a Kango guy, right?

[Kyle]

Is it George Wallace?

[Mikey]

I think so.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

You know who else is a Kango guy? Michael Jordan. Did you see the video of him?

[Brandon]

Hellboy get ice out of his shirt.

[Danny]

Oh, yeah. He was wearing it.

[Mikey]

Does anyone here have a cool take about pedophiles?

[Danny]

I didn't notice the Kango in that video.

[Brandon]

I assume you guys talked about it extensively on mostly sources. We did on pmt. But the KD burner is just.

[Kyle]

That's great.

[Brandon]

It's so Funny. And the fact that he spent the entire All Star game on the phone.

[Kyle]

He. He's the only professional athlete that if we hired here at Barstool, we would just give him like an anonymous blogger profile.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

We wouldn't give him a podcast. We would just let him be for. He's. He's meek, Phil.

[Brandon]

He's Rico.

[Kyle]

Rico. Yeah.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Rico's got burners.

[Kyle]

He's got the one burners. He have multiple burners. And then he's just warming up and looking at his phone.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Titus]

You're saying.

[Brandon]

So my. I actually think there's a chance that KD is so addicted to Twitter that he was on a third burner roasting kd.

[Donnie]

Oh.

[Kyle]

Oh. He's.

[Brandon]

He was like, the. The action is so hot right now. I gotta get some.

[Titus]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Donnie]

I think he does get.

[Brandon]

He was a burner of himself. He was roasting himself with his third burner.

[Kyle]

You think he's maybe his primary hater then?

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Right. Like, he's so in it.

[Titus]

It's all. It's all kd.

[Danny]

Everyone on Twitter dead is actually just. Everything's kd.

[Brandon]

Yeah, everything's kd.

[Titus]

Kevin Durant is all of us.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

There.

[Kyle]

Someone.

[Brandon]

Someone put it perfectly. They're like the. The craziest part about KD is, you know, like he's driving back from the All Star Game in like diamond encrusted Rolls Royce, just searching his name on Twitter to arrive at his $18 million house where he's going to stay up till 6 in the morning. Just searching his name on Twitter.

[Kyle]

That's what I said.

[Brandon]

Can't get off.

[Kyle]

It's one of the ultimate winners in our society. Gold medalist, champion, number one, number two, draft pick, whatever. He's been a winner his whole life and he's such a loser when it comes to this.

[Brandon]

Yeah. But he's. Yeah.

[Mikey]

So he's been like, for sure, for sure.

[Brandon]

No, we don't know for sure. There's enough.

[Mikey]

Enough.

[Brandon]

There's. It's definitely people that put pieces together. And I'll say this. This is. This one's different than this last burner thing because he was trashing his teammates. Like, I think there's. Pft. Disagree with me. I think it's going to be awkward for some of his teammates.

[Danny]

It would have to be.

[Brandon]

Has to be.

[Donnie]

I think it just felt so authentically real.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

Coming. It felt like his voice, what I'd imagined it to be.

[Brandon]

He was calling.

[Donnie]

He's funny.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is his teammate right now, Jabari.

[Donnie]

Like, get off my Dickerson is.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

That's something he would.

[Danny]

I love the other guys. Get. I'm like, dude, you have a game in one minute. Literally one minute, dude.

[Donnie]

Well, who are the other guys? Just random dudes.

[Brandon]

He's just in a group chat, Brandon.

[Titus]

You're saying if we hired him, we wouldn't even make it public? That we.

[Kyle]

Right.

[Titus]

We would keep it secret. Put him in a dark room somewhere.

[Kyle]

Yeah, yeah. Just let him troll.

[Titus]

Tell him to harass and troll.

[Danny]

This one made me laugh.

[Brandon]

This one was good.

[Danny]

Come on, kevin.

[Mikey]

To the face.

[Kate]

Wait, why do we think it was him, but still aren't 100% sure.

[Titus]

I'm still confused by that, too, Danny. I feel like someone just said, this is Kevin Durant, and everyone's like, yeah.

[Danny]

It'S like the same.

[Titus]

All right.

[Kyle]

That is kind of what happened happen. Okay. It's kind of taking somebody's.

[Danny]

It's fun to believe.

[Titus]

Yeah. I.

[Donnie]

What's helping him is now people are making a bunch of obviously fake ones.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Donnie]

So people are just going to assume any. Any of them are fake.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

But he is the guy that you would fake this for.

[TJ]

Kevin Durant also very conveniently stopped tweeting after this tweet came out. And he had been tweeting at just like anybody. Like, he.

[Danny]

He.

[TJ]

And he just, like, hasn't tweeted since.

[Titus]

But he's still on his phone just as much.

[TJ]

Every shot of him is on his phone.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Huh.

[Kyle]

He's taking the information in. He's just not spitting information back out right now.

[TJ]

Not out on his main.

[Titus]

On his main account.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Maybe.

[TJ]

Big Cat. Did you see Obama and Red Panda?

[Danny]

No good collab.

[Brandon]

They were collabing.

[TJ]

Obama just very clearly wanted to be watching Red Panda, but he had to do an interview with Reggie.

[Brandon]

Oh, that's awesome. He's just like us. I mean, Red Panda's the best.

[TJ]

Shout out to her. She had, like, a kind of a rough patch a couple years ago.

[Brandon]

She did. She also broke her leg.

[TJ]

Right.

[Titus]

She was washed there for a second.

[Brandon]

She ain't washed.

[TJ]

Second prime.

[Titus]

She got it back.

[Brandon]

I heard Dana's trashing the badgers on mostly hoops.

[Titus]

Great. Probably the best moment in the brief history of mostly hoops this morning where the chat was calling him out for not liking Big Ten basketball, specifically Wisconsin. And he, like, losing his mind is an overstatement, but he was just like, what the. I like, what the f. Look at that. And he grabs his backpack and pulls cheese out of it. He's just like, Would I have cheese in my backpack if I didn't like Wisconsin?

[Brandon]

But I told him after.

[Titus]

It was incredible.

[Brandon]

That was. That was just his version of doing, I have a black friend.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Like, that's cheese.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Look at the cheese, guys.

[Ad Read]

Hey.

[Brandon]

Cheese.

[Titus]

But I was so taken aback.

[Brandon]

She just keeps that thing on him.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

What do you mean, bag of cheese?

[Titus]

Also, the allegation was like, you don't like Big Ten basketball. And he was like, I have cheese. Everyone knows if you have cheese in your backpack.

[Mikey]

Yeah, you like the pedophile. Hold on.

[Brandon]

I think we've said this probably every single year since we've known each other, Titus. But, like, this has to be the year that Big Ten wins. It feels even though there's so many good years. Yeah, we've done this so many times.

[Kyle]

Big 12's pretty loaded, too.

[Brandon]

Oh, every. There's 10 teams that can win the title.

[Mikey]

You boys see that Arizona, Texas game this weekend?

[Kyle]

Try again.

[Brandon]

Very close.

[Mikey]

Be on the tv. When I was.

[Titus]

They were showing the wrong game at the women's bar. Sounds like you're talking about the softball game we were talking about.

[Mikey]

You guys see that field game?

[Brandon]

I did bet the Badgers to win the national title. I had to.

[Titus]

What were Those million dollars?

[Brandon]

150 to 1.

[Titus]

Yeah, why not? Why not?

[Brandon]

Had to.

[Titus]

Two great guards.

[Brandon]

Them. Florida and Yukon. Those are my three horses.

[Titus]

Yeah, why not?

[Brandon]

Why not?

[Kyle]

Why not?

[Brandon]

Why not?

[Mikey]

Has a super underdog ever won? I remember, like, St. Peter is the one.

[Kyle]

Yes.

[Brandon]

That was a. That was the. That was. That was inglorious bastards 3. Is super underdog ever won?

[Titus]

That was the question. That was the question of the day at the women's sports bar as a.

[Mikey]

Super underdog ever up follow any sports.

[Kyle]

Yeah, that's your. That's your fault for talking.

[Brandon]

Super underdog.

[Mikey]

You know what I mean?

[Kyle]

The fact that you talk there is crazy.

[Mikey]

Like, Wisconsin's an underdog dog. St. Peter's is a super underdog.

[Brandon]

Super underdog.

[Titus]

No, no, no.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Brandon]

Not a super NC state. And what were they? An eight seed in eight seeds.

[Kyle]

85.

[Titus]

Those super underdogs.

[Brandon]

Those super, super underdogs.

[Mikey]

Oh, you guys.

[Brandon]

Super underdog.

[Titus]

Super underdog is crazy. In all my years. In all my years. Not once. Not once have I heard that.

[Kyle]

Why is there. Michael?

[Danny]

I was peeing. But I'm sure whatever's happening is deserved.

[Kyle]

Yeah, you're right. You're right.

[Mikey]

I'm starting to agree with Donnie and Mikey bats a little bit. Might be a bad person.

[Kyle]

Mark.

[Mikey]

It's okay.

[Kyle]

Mark.

[Mikey]

Oh, he's so.

[Kyle]

Mark.

[Mikey]

So cool, dude.

[Brandon]

Chef Donnie, he's in like the. He's in a postcard. He's skiing in a postcard?

[Danny]

Yeah. He's like going up those beautiful lifts.

[Brandon]

I did a picture. It looked insane.

[Kyle]

I knew he's tried to spell wedge. We dag on that show. I had never watched the clip. Clip came across my timeline yesterday and I watched it for the first time and it's way worse than even that.

[Danny]

Well, it's funny because you could see his confidence diminish because he's writing smaller. It almost ends up looking like an eye chart.

[Kyle]

By the time the only thing he was certain of was you couldn't put the D before the G. That was the.

[Danny]

There was so much wrong. There was so much wrong.

[Kyle]

They were so funny.

[Brandon]

He's the best.

[Titus]

He's in France skiing right now.

[Kyle]

Skiing.

[Titus]

What a life.

[Brandon]

And it looks insane. I don't know if the. I don't know if it was an Instagram story, but the picture was just like. Just when you close your eyes and you think of. What is that?

[Danny]

Start over here.

[Mikey]

What is that?

[Danny]

And Kyle was not even supposed to be in the scene. You were like eating Chipotle. You were disappointed.

[Brandon]

D can't be there. I'm trying every combo. No, it's not GDE wedged. Yeah, it is. No. There we go. Dude, am I. Do I have all the letters?

[Kyle]

Give me one more try. Read that.

[Brandon]

Wedged.

[Kyle]

Read it.

[Brandon]

Wedged it.

[Donnie]

Sound out that.

[Brandon]

What? Weged it.

[Titus]

We edged it.

[Donnie]

There you go.

[Brandon]

How do you change that sound, though? How do you change that sound?

[Danny]

How could you ever get the D before the G?

[Kyle]

The science.

[Danny]

Change.

[Brandon]

How do you change that sound? Well, now I have an A.

[Danny]

Anybody blame.

[Brandon]

He wrote it.

[Danny]

W. E. I'm right.

[Kyle]

Wedge.

[Mikey]

Look how tiny.

[Brandon]

No, no, they're coming. I've tried every common combo. Dude, help me out.

[Kyle]

What did I do with this A? That came out of nowhere.

[Brandon]

Hangman. What?

[Danny]

Then he play hangman where he'd still have to spell.

[Brandon]

What am I missing? This was right.

[Danny]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

All right.

[Danny]

I'm really disappointed in that. Well, you told me it was wrong. It is wrong.

[Brandon]

The ending was tough cuz the. It's the French.

[TJ]

Always end something with an E. Wedge.

[Danny]

Ends with an E. Yeah, I got no excuse.

[Brandon]

You just went to a generic I spoke for. He's the best.

[Mikey]

Whoa, he's that fresh, pal.

[Danny]

Gotta be.

[Titus]

Oh, wait, yeah, that does that look.

[Danny]

That would be a shitty postcard.

[Brandon]

No, the. The one that I saw was. Was expired. There was, like, a perfect village.

[Danny]

Good Lord.

[Kyle]

Yeah, it's a lot of snow.

[Brandon]

He's in a nice place. Where's it. What was the location?

[Danny]

He's in the French Alps.

[Brandon]

Yeah, but what was the actual. I want to look at that town.

[Donnie]

Maribel.

[Brandon]

Dude, this place.

[Kyle]

Maribel.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Oh, Donnie, you dog.

[Brandon]

Oh, they have. Oh, yeah. Oh, look at that.

[Kyle]

Oh, yeah.

[Donnie]

Center. What is it?

[Danny]

Oh, man. He's gonna try and make one of them his neighbor.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

All right.

[Brandon]

Darn it.

[Kyle]

Wait.

[Titus]

Keep going.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Danny]

Wait, when does it stop?

[Brandon]

Tj, you clicked on the one of a house. Hot chick.

[Danny]

This is crazy.

[Donnie]

The town.

[Mikey]

I haven't seen a studded belt yet, though.

[Kyle]

No, not his time.

[Brandon]

Get that guy out of here.

[Mikey]

Anything? Yeah, yeah.

[Danny]

Yes.

[TJ]

Okay.

[Brandon]

Yeah, big time. Yes.

[Danny]

Go to her.

[Kyle]

Page.

[Danny]

Four likes.

[Titus]

Oh.

[Brandon]

Oh, she's a baddie, huh?

[Mikey]

Yep.

[Danny]

Is she fake?

[Donnie]

Wait, how many of those women were fake? Oh, no.

[Brandon]

Oh, no.

[Danny]

How many of those women are fake?

[Donnie]

Probably did look uncanny.

[Brandon]

Oh, that one is probably fake.

[Danny]

11,000 likes.

[Brandon]

This one looks fake.

[Mikey]

Oh, she's real. She's a supermodel. Yeah.

[Brandon]

Good for you, Donnie. That's real.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Titus]

All right.

[Mikey]

That's a fun.

[Kyle]

So for clarity, we're just looking at hot chicks now.

[Brandon]

Yep.

[Titus]

We're learning more about this town.

[Kyle]

Okay, I'm sorry. Sorry.

[Brandon]

That one.

[Titus]

Click.

[Brandon]

The one with the woman on the ski.

[Danny]

The leaning.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Donnie]

Oh, she's funny.

[Brandon]

She's really funny. She's got a good personality.

[Danny]

Oh, the art of wearing less. Okay, but meaning more. She's philosophical.

[Donnie]

Yes. I'm French in la, but I'm studying that art.

[Kyle]

Yes.

[Danny]

Have you read the Art of America any less? I have some literature I think you'd love.

[Titus]

Good for Donnie.

[Danny]

Great for Donnie.

[Brandon]

For him, we do the Factor Read.

[Kyle]

Brandon. Yeah.

[Brandon]

Last one, we got. Last one.

[Kyle]

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[Kate]

Free breakfast.

[Brandon]

So do we want to do Hateless on Wednesday? You want to do it tomorrow? What do you guys.

[Danny]

I need one.

[Donnie]

Give me.

[Brandon]

What.

[Kyle]

What are you doing to that thing?

[Kate]

Don't worry about it. Do you have a lot of people on your hate list or just no people?

[Brandon]

Jonardi.

[Kyle]

Oh, wow. Whoa.

[Brandon]

I. Here's another one. I. I hate that cornbread should be more wide. It should be on every menu. It should be the basic. Like every appetizer menu has, you know, calamari or mozzarella.

[Kyle]

Like cornbread buddy. You just need to move to the South.

[Brandon]

It's so good.

[Kyle]

The South. Is cornbreads on every minute.

[Brandon]

It's ever. It's so. I've never gotten cornbread and been like.

[Kyle]

Wish I hadn't gotten this cornbread is good.

[Kate]

I think we should eat corned beef more other than just St. Patrick's Day.

[Brandon]

Okay.

[Kyle]

Corn.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Is that. It's not hate, though.

[Kyle]

That's also correct.

[Danny]

Love.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

No, the. My specific hate is that cornbread is not more widely.

[Kyle]

Got it.

[Kate]

There's ways to.

[Kyle]

But it's weird because. What? You're actually declaring your love for cornbread and declaring your hate for cornbread.

[Brandon]

Not having yet. Not getting enough respect. Respect.

[Kyle]

Okay. Yeah, you can.

[Brandon]

You can flip it up like that.

[Kyle]

Sure.

[Brandon]

You kind of get funky with it.

[Kyle]

See, I almost. I almost did a fat guy move just now. What? Almost texted my wife, said, hey, what would I. Cornbread. Yeah, but I'm not gonna do it.

[Brandon]

That's so fat. No, you can. Cuz tomorrow is when we start.

[Kate]

Tomorrow is Fat Tuesday too.

[Kyle]

Get it all out of the way.

[Brandon]

Tomorrow is when we start our fitness journey.

[Titus]

You can't start your fitness journey on Fat Tuesday.

[Mikey]

Wait, tomorrow's the day you gorge, right?

[Kyle]

And then you start the next day.

[Brandon]

Not us.

[Kyle]

We're starting.

[Brandon]

Brandon.

[Kyle]

We're gonna let up.

[Brandon]

We're the only ones who are working out on fat.

[Danny]

Wait, when is Marty gr.

[Kyle]

It should be ending tomorrow.

[Brandon]

Forever.

[Danny]

Does it forever?

[Brandon]

I think it's been going.

[Kyle]

Doesn't end on Fat Tuesday.

[Danny]

Oh, it's been going on.

[Mikey]

Oh, yeah. Different neighborhoods do different for like a month and a half, I feel like.

[Brandon]

Do you think there's a chance M. Gr.

[Kyle]

Oh, I think he did. Yeah.

[Danny]

That's crazy.

[Kyle]

And I think in his Mind. It was a giant sacrifice.

[Brandon]

Yeah. No, it definitely was.

[Kyle]

He's like, I'm gonna. I'm gonna start showing him how serious I am. I'm not gonna go to Marty Gr.

[Brandon]

I'm going to Turkey.

[Kyle]

Gonna take this free trip to Turkey instead.

[Brandon]

Mm.

[Kyle]

I really. I do think for him it was Mexico Widespread panic or Mardi Gras, and he ended up doing Mexico widespread panic.

[Danny]

We all make sacrifices.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

I had a tough realization because I have a cousin who, like, is into jam bands. She actually was the person who got me into jam bands when I was younger. But she goes to a lot of these. Like, she. She's, like, at Fish right now, and there's a decent chance she, like, has met Miny.

[Kyle]

She's crossed paths with.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Which is just a horrific feeling.

[Kyle]

Like, she's turned around with two drinks in her hand to go back to her seat. And Min's just.

[Brandon]

Yeah. Like, they probably have run in the same circles, and it's just like.

[Danny]

Is she married?

[Brandon]

No, she's not. There might be a chance she doesn't like.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Men.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Okay. Which hopefully.

[Mikey]

I saw her on Friday. Was she in?

[Danny]

Yeah, the lady sports bar.

[Kyle]

Bar.

[Mikey]

Yeah.

[Danny]

I'm. I want to go.

[Mikey]

It's lovely.

[Brandon]

We should do it.

[Mikey]

It smells good.

[Brandon]

They will have us. We will do a live yak from there.

[Kyle]

You keep saying the smell multiple times.

[Mikey]

It was the first thing that hit me when I walked.

[Danny]

Do sports bars smell bad?

[Brandon]

I want to go. We should go and just.

[Mikey]

Wet rags.

[Kyle]

Just go.

[Titus]

Rip art.

[Kyle]

Smell like candles or something.

[Mikey]

Your ass. The bouncer was no joke, I'll tell you that.

[Brandon]

Was it a woman?

[Mikey]

Yes.

[Kyle]

The bouncer was a woman. Woman.

[Mikey]

Yes. And she could pick you up by your scruffier neck and toss out.

[Brandon]

278.

[Kyle]

What position is she playing?

[Brandon]

278.

[Mikey]

What's one where you get low and you have a lot of oomph?

[Kyle]

You talk about super underdog catcher.

[Mikey]

Super underdog.

[Titus]

What do you think?

[Mikey]

Super download.

[Titus]

What do you think's, like, the most busy night that they'll ever have at the women's sports bar?

[Kyle]

WNBA draft.

[Mikey]

The, Like, a heated rivalry type finale night.

[Brandon]

But that's men watching men.

[Danny]

That's men. Men.

[Kyle]

That's men's sports.

[TJ]

That's not.

[Titus]

That's television.

[Kyle]

You shouldn't.

[Titus]

If.

[Danny]

If they were showing lesbian porn, I would be there.

[Mikey]

I don't know. Probably wnba, like, some kind of championship game.

[Kate]

But do they also have, like, Gilmore Girls on one tv or was it all sports?

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

I was only there On a Friday night.

[Brandon]

Women's World Cup.

[Titus]

Women's World Cup.

[Mikey]

Pie line out the door.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

College softball World Series.

[Danny]

Or is it just airing halftime shows?

[Mikey]

Yeah, there it is, babe.

[Titus]

Sports bar.

[Mikey]

I'm afraid they're gonna ban me.

[Danny]

They're not gonna ban.

[Titus]

Let's look at the calendar. What do we.

[Kyle]

Yeah, let's see what they got.

[Mikey]

Coming home. I hate you guys.

[Kyle]

Hockey. Oh, Queer speed dating for 35 plus.

[Brandon]

That's fun.

[Mikey]

If that's what you're buying.

[Brandon]

Spelling bee.

[Kyle]

So if I'm 34, I can't go to queer speed dating?

[Brandon]

No, not overweight speed dating.

[Kyle]

Taquitos.

[Brandon]

What's queer astrology?

[Titus]

Yeah, right.

[Mikey]

They're reading your. Everybody welcome. And we're gonna read your astrology.

[Kyle]

It's so you have to be.

[Kate]

Is this a gay one?

[Mikey]

Anybody could be. You know, it's for everybody. But not. People are gonna come and fart.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Mikey]

The vibe. Stay away.

[Brandon]

We'll burp too.

[Mikey]

Nobody be weird. See, I'm afraid you guys are gonna ruin.

[Danny]

No, nobody ruin this. That'd be up. Be normal. Yeah, Titus, you're spreading your legs more. Reading that. That's how he's gonna sit.

[Titus]

Let me just get in. See what we got going on in here. Did somebody say women's bobsled?

[Mikey]

Ladies, if you want a fun night out without the riff raff spreading around all over town, highly recommend.

[Kyle]

It.

[Mikey]

Smells good in there.

[Kyle]

All right.

[Titus]

Smells good.

[Mikey]

Brandon's obese.

[Kyle]

I didn't die to say anything. That's Titus talking. All right.

[Brandon]

So hate Wednesday.

[Kyle]

Hate Wednesday.

[Donnie]

Wednesday.

[Danny]

Kate's just gonna have a list of us.

[Mikey]

Yes.

[Brandon]

Warranted.

[Mikey]

Sheesh.

[Brandon]

Yeah, I, I, I mean, I didn't put a lot of people on, but you could.

[Donnie]

Types of people, maybe.

[Brandon]

Like what?

[Danny]

Like local newscasters that walk in the Generations pub and act like they own it?

[Donnie]

Exactly.

[Kate]

Okay.

[Brandon]

What?

[Danny]

Nothing.

[Mikey]

Did that happen this weekend?

[Danny]

I have beef with so many local newscasts.

[Brandon]

What happened?

[Danny]

No, it didn't happen this weekend. This is a long running thing.

[Mikey]

Oh, here in Chicago?

[Danny]

Wheeling.

[Mikey]

Oh, Wheeling.

[Brandon]

He walked in like he owned the place.

[Danny]

There's one guy that drives me bonkers.

[Kyle]

What's his name?

[Danny]

I don't want to say.

[Mikey]

I feel like you've brought him up before.

[Titus]

I have?

[Kate]

I. Yeah.

[Danny]

This has been a long time. Oh, well.

[Brandon]

Him up.

[Danny]

No Chant. No. No. It's not right. Right. I'm going to do just things and maybe him.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Brandon]

Okay.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Let's spin the wheel. Stephen Shay.

[Kyle]

Back tomorrow.

[Mikey]

School's off tomorrow, too.

[Brandon]

Oh, yeah.

[Mikey]

These damn kids.

[Brandon]

Although I don't know. Suburbs might not have the double day.

[Titus]

Huh?

[Mikey]

No, no.

[Ad Read]

Come on.

[Brandon]

That's funny.

[Danny]

And there's nobody.

[Mikey]

No one even likes it.

[Brandon]

Now, that's funny. That's funny.

[Kyle]

The contractor coming to the house.

[Danny]

Is there anybody we can come get sit in here?

[Brandon]

Who's in the gambling cave right now?

[Kyle]

Nobody. Rick and Bloodman.

[Titus]

Bloodman. Come on.

[Kyle]

I want to say a wet Bloodman just for fun.

[Danny]

I don't even know how that would look.

[Kate]

Look, Eddie was on.

[Brandon]

Eddie was on. Oh, wait. Let's see.

[Kate]

Definitely get read in here.

[Brandon]

Max is here.

[Titus]

Reed's not watching.

[Kyle]

I haven't seen Max trick Max.

[Titus]

I'll go get read. Wish.

[Kyle]

Have a seat. Butman.

[Donnie]

Stand up.

[Danny]

Move. H. Yep.

[Brandon]

Yeah, that was a. That was a really cool move.

[Danny]

Yeah, but now he, like. He has such good cosmic energy on his side.

[Kyle]

It will never first out.

[TJ]

Yeah.

[Titus]

All right. That's all we really needed.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Kyle]

See you.

[Titus]

Do you want to tell Reed to come in?

[Kyle]

Yeah, I could try that.

[Titus]

We have something important to tell him.

[Mikey]

Okay.

[Kyle]

Is Reed aware of anything right now?

[Kate]

Jeez.

[Kyle]

Hey, Reed.

[Kate]

Get comfy.

[Kyle]

Come here. We got to talk to you. I don't think he knows.

[Kate]

No, he has his headphones in. Perfect.

[Brandon]

Play cool.

[Danny]

Play cool.

[Kyle]

Yo, here, real quick.

[Danny]

We have boss. Go on.

[Brandon]

No, no.

[Kyle]

Yeah. We just got a real quick question. All right.

[Danny]

Thank you, Reed.

[Kyle]

Thank you.

[Brandon]

Cool. Thanks, Reed.

[Titus]

Thanks, Reed.

[Brandon]

Good job, bro.

[Kyle]

Appreciate it.

[Titus]

Appreciate you. That's all we need.

[Brandon]

All right.

[Kyle]

Stay close in case you get wet.

[Danny]

T. Appreciate it, Big T. We have Rand Paul on.

[Brandon]

That would be. Why would I want to talk to Randy? Well, you want to give a piece.

[Danny]

Of your mind, you can piece of your mind. Mike Huckabee.

[Brandon]

Do you think I'm thinking about betting Tennessee to win the national championship?

[Titus]

It's a good bet.

[Kyle]

Is Joey coming back? I mean, the. The judge is doing his thing right now, right? You need a mic.

[Mikey]

I can't hear him.

[Kyle]

You need a mic. I'm not speaking to these people. I'm just speaking in the void. I don't know how this works, but I'm just gonna. Who are you looking at?

[Brandon]

What are you doing? Come over here. Big T. Huh?

[Mikey]

Is he the smartest guy here?

[Brandon]

He's so.

[Kyle]

He's just a kudan.

[Brandon]

Just want him to like me.

[Kyle]

I love him so much.

[Brandon]

K. Big dog.

[Kyle]

Let's go.

[Titus]

Stop.

[Kyle]

Big.

[Brandon]

You Big T. You know what?

[Kyle]

K. Big T. If you don't want to do it, you don't have to do it.

[Brandon]

Tell other people K, get in here, bro.

[Mikey]

He opens a window.

[Brandon]

Dude. Yo, we're talking about this weekend. Football Guy genuinely loved seeing you guys out.

[Titus]

That was awesome, dude.

[Brandon]

It keeps barstool young. Yeah, it's sick to watch the boys just. All right, thanks.

[Kyle]

Yeah, thanks. Oh, wet Will.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hang out. It did look like an awesome time this weekend.

[Kyle]

Yeah, it was Family Guy bar, I guess. I mean, and shout out out Dana's.

[Brandon]

Wife because she just sat there and watched us two idiots drink on Valentine's Day. Oh, she was there. Yeah. It was awesome. I also, this is a me problem, but on Friday. So I cleaned out my office, and I'm. I willingly say anyone who wants to take something within every single time I do this, within 24 hours, Nikki smokes, goes out with one of my shirts, and I'm just like, on Friday night.

[Danny]

Grateful Dead shirt.

[Brandon]

Yeah, it was the Grateful Dead shirt he faced.

[Danny]

Time me to show off his fit.

[Brandon]

Yeah, that was my shirt.

[Kyle]

Yeah, I was with him.

[Brandon]

I. I can't be mad, because it is. I am doing it. I'm saying everyone wants to take from it, but it's just every time he's got something. Yeah, that's my shirt. It's instant, too.

[Kyle]

Well, at least I can't fit in.

[Brandon]

Any of your shirts, so you know it's not me. Yeah, I. Listen, I would love for you to wear my fire. Yeah.

[Kyle]

Awesome.

[Brandon]

Sports is hell.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Okay, let's spin the wheel.

[Kate]

I have a terrible feeling about this.

[Brandon]

For what? Oh, yeah, here it is. When he said Kareem Abdul Jabbar.

[TJ]

Doing this at the Family Guy bar is so funny.

[Brandon]

Jason Kid, too.

[Kyle]

Point guard. I love the not Kareem Abdul jab.

[Brandon]

Magic Four step five. We're talking point guard. You keep saying that over and over.

[Danny]

That doesn't make it less dumb.

[Brandon]

They used to distribute the ball, so.

[Mikey]

Do magic and stuff.

[Brandon]

They're on the list below chauncy pillows.

[Kyle]

You weren't around for how magical that was.

[Danny]

We have Deutsch.

[Brandon]

You have no idea what it was like to watch Chauncey Billups in his. I love Deutsch so much. Did you go out with him on Sunday?

[TJ]

Saturday.

[Brandon]

But he texted everyone. Sunday, right?

[Kyle]

Yeah, they.

[Brandon]

Yeah, everyone. I mean, it was beautiful.

[Kyle]

The first beautiful day.

[Brandon]

They were all having beers on Sunday.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Oh, they actually did go out.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

Oh, yeah. But I. I said, I'm.

[Eddie]

I'm giving.

[Brandon]

In a month, I'm gonna learn how to drink like Deutsch, chug like Deutsch. What? That's giving out a One month.

[Titus]

He did say that, that, that you can learn.

[Brandon]

I was, I was trying it. We were at the bar and I was doing it with like a quarter beer and I was doing it well. And then the one time I did it, I just spit everything up.

[Donnie]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

I'm just laughing because it's like, like imagine maybe not you because you could have potentially played in the NFL, but like another 24 year old being like, what. What's going on at work? Well, I got a month to learn how to chug really fast.

[Donnie]

It's a, it's tight deadline.

[Brandon]

Yeah, it's going to be a tough one.

[Titus]

Bosses on?

[Brandon]

Yeah. They're expecting me to deliver and I just haven't been able to.

[Donnie]

A lot of overtime hours.

[Brandon]

Yeah, it's tough.

[Kyle]

Tough deal.

[Brandon]

Oh, man, my performance review. I'm so nervous for it. If I can't chug this beard one gulp, he's gonna fire me.

[Titus]

They're like, what?

[Brandon]

All right, let's spin the wheel. Danny says he's got a bad. Danny, you've never been wet.

[Danny]

Oh, that looks good now.

[Kate]

And I swe.

[Danny]

Tj have you ever been wet?

[TJ]

I don't think so.

[Kyle]

DJ Hasn't. Yeah, I'm doing always Titus. Right.

[Brandon]

What are we rooting for other than Brandon?

[Kyle]

Why?

[Brandon]

Because you'll have a reaction. That would be funny.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon]

And I've never seen £278 wet.

[Kyle]

Well.

[Brandon]

You get 350, £15 wet. Come on.

[Titus]

There we go. There we go.

[Brandon]

There we go, Titus.

[Donnie]

Wow.

[Brandon]

Good brother.

[Kyle]

That's.

[Brandon]

That feels good, doesn't it? Now you can just sit back.

[Kyle]

Oh, this is. No, no, he deserved that.

[Brandon]

He deserved that. It was a stand up move by him.

[Kyle]

Big T shouldn't be allowed to watch.

[Brandon]

Let the boy watch. Terrain.

[Kyle]

Big Nick.

[Brandon]

Big Nick. Oh, you good man, Nick.

[Kate]

Thank you.

[Danny]

I know what you're trying to do.

[Brandon]

You Danny, you piece of. Danny, say no. I feel bad.

[Kate]

Feeling never been wet.

[Kyle]

No, it's. It's super funny though.

[Danny]

Brandon, you're only hurting yourself.

[Brandon]

Here comes the anger.

[Kyle]

Funny.

[Titus]

You're making it funny.

[Kyle]

One time five years ago, Nick's like, it wasn't me. Yes, it was. Shut up. Oh, it was Nick. And then five for five years beholden to this goddamn.

[Titus]

Well played, kb.

[Kyle]

We're just beholden to this wheel.

[Brandon]

It's huge.

[Kyle]

We're all grown. Why can't we just say no? Nobody would read. What was that face?

[Mikey]

He's a bad guy.

[Titus]

There you go. Katie, Mike.

[Kyle]

Appreciate you guys.

[Brandon]

Big Mike. What a size and piss his pants. Again.

[Mikey]

Still think about how he said his family built all.

[Brandon]

There you go, Brandon.

[Kyle]

This is gonna.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Mikey]

All the cabinets at the Pittsburgh.

[Kyle]

Here we go. Oh, he's got to get wet.

[Brandon]

Oh, man, now I'm nervous now.

[Kyle]

No, I'm in trouble.

[Brandon]

I'm. I feel like I'm in trouble.

[Mikey]

I put on mascara today and never do that same.

[Brandon]

I got in trouble.

[Kyle]

Dog goes back to back piss.

[Brandon]

May the best man win.

[Danny]

Oh, all right.

[Brandon]

Taking my shoes off.

[Kyle]

It's too late for should have done that three times.

[Brandon]

I know, I know, I know, I know.

[Mikey]

Now this time I would have to.

[Danny]

Poop right got back to back sweeps is a poop.

[Brandon]

Oh, no.

[Kyle]

I mean Piston is still on the table here.

[Brandon]

Very much still on the table.

[Danny]

Is that Z's piss box right there?

[Kyle]

Where did you get rid of the piss box? I guess it's right there.

[Mikey]

There we go.

[Brandon]

No, I threw it out. Is it up? I'd rather piss my pants to get wet.

[Danny]

No, I think I would.

[Mikey]

At least that's warm.

[Kyle]

It's much easier fix and you gain.

[Danny]

A ton of respect from the fellows.

[Brandon]

Yeah, yeah, that's true. The fellas do love it. It.

[Danny]

Oh, back from vacay.

[Kyle]

All right.

[Titus]

Just like that.

[Danny]

Oh, Was that an all black Legends tea?

[Donnie]

Legends tea?

[Mikey]

Yeah. He should do the.

[TJ]

The mobility drills while he's soaking.

[Brandon]

What?

[Danny]

T.J. you're sick.

[Donnie]

What am I soaking?

[Mikey]

Do you guys remember the big Johnson T shirts?

[Brandon]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Mikey]

Kind of like Big dog, but big. It was like this white kid who was like, cool.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Danny]

I don't remember who was on it.

[Kyle]

It was always a pun. Yeah, yeah. Big Johnson was always a penis related pun.

[Titus]

Oh, yeah.

[Danny]

Penis shirts were huge back then because the big Peckers restaurant like that was on the shore.

[Kyle]

Sure, sure.

[Danny]

Those were hilarious.

[Kyle]

Well, any T shirt with a funny slip. Logan was. Yeah, like the big dog with the Seinfeld dog and all that.

[Danny]

I got sent home from school for wearing a who flung poo shirt with a monkey.

[Mikey]

That's kids were getting in trouble for the big Johnson shirts. They tried to argue.

[Kyle]

I had a headless guy on my T shirt that held a sign said, we'll work for head.

[Danny]

Did you know what head was at the time?

[Kyle]

Not even really. Yeah, my principal did, though.

[Danny]

Hell yeah.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Sucker.

[Kyle]

He's like, you know, you don't even know what this is.

[Mikey]

That's the make seven up yours was. Yeah, Johnson. He always had some big.

[Kyle]

There's not much room in the box when you're swinging a big Johnson.

[Mikey]

Oh, hell, Yeah, I kind of forgot about those.

[Danny]

And those are cool.

[Donnie]

Remember we were just like in class giving airhead.

[Danny]

Yeah, just.

[Donnie]

Yeah, with the. Yeah, the tongue and the cheek and our 30 year old teacher just had.

[Danny]

To like watch us like when we put our hands. We did like the jerk off thing.

[Donnie]

What the do I do?

[Danny]

I get paid $12,000 a year. I'm going to let these boys just suck dick. I'm going to sit back.

[Donnie]

Is that all I call out? What do I even say to Carter Hoffman?

[Danny]

It's always going to Carter off. He was always doing it.

[Donnie]

Then you have to like, do I call his mom? Like, no, you just got to let the boys do it.

[Danny]

Yeah, yeah. Carter found out what head is like, what do you do? You just gotta let him suck. That was fast.

[Kyle]

He's wet.

[Donnie]

Oh, my God.

[Mikey]

Oh, yeah.

[Kyle]

No, don't come over here. Come on. Come on, man. Come on, man.

[Brandon]

See, that's funny.

[Titus]

See that, Brandon?

[Danny]

He's soaked.

[Kyle]

You're wet.

[Brandon]

See how wet I am?

[Donnie]

You're wet in the legend shirt.

[Brandon]

Dude, I'd never wear this shirt.

[Titus]

Stay humble.

[Danny]

Wetting the Legends tea.

[Brandon]

All right, see you tomorrow.

[TJ]

Have a good week, everybody. Love you guys.