Our Next Dating Show Contestant Has Been Announced | The Yak 1-13-26

Summary

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The Yak — "Our Next Dating Show Contestant Has Been Announced"

Date: January 13, 2026
Host & Panel: Barstool Sports (Big Cat, Brandon Walker, Kyle "KBNoSwag" Bauer, Nick, Rone, Lil Sas, Kate, Steven Cheah, Eddie, Connor Griffin, Titus, Marshall)

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Episode Overview

This episode of The Yak is signature Barstool chaos and comedy with a heavy focus on the announcement and early planning for their next big in-house dating show, featuring Connor Griffin as the upcoming contestant. While much of the banter is classic office-guy riffing, two main arcs emerge:

• The breakdown and reaction to the viral Jaguars press conference "pep talk" moment and its ripple through the sports journalism world,
• The official unveiling of the upcoming dating contest with Connor as the bachelor, including live brainstorming and some laugh-out-loud debates about his preferences and dealbreakers.

Along the way, the crew dives into sports media "rules," men’s fashion, food delivery disasters, hot guy debates, absurd bodily function stories, and the cyclical misery of being a Steelers fan.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Food Delivery Mishaps & Robotic Deliveries

• Brandon Walker kicks things off [04:43] with a tale of a failed salad delivery—he was duped by a delivery driver using a stock photo as "proof of delivery."
  • "I was walking around outside with the security guard around the block looking for a white door…" — Brandon [04:43]
• The group riffs on delivery scams: switching between apps for new accounts, the futility of chasing small tips, and feeling "got" when online scams work.
• Kate relays an experience with a food delivery robot: "I watched as it took a hour to go half a mile. And then pizza was cold and floppy." [06:46]

2. The Jaguars Pep Talk Press Conference: Sports Journalist Meltdown

• The group erupts in debate over a viral Jacksonville Jaguars press conference, where reporter Lynn Jones started with a heartfelt pep talk to the coach instead of a hard-hitting question [10:00].
  • Connor: “The reason I hate these scoops guys so much is because I just hate any sports journalist that believes what they do is important...” [10:25]
  • Big Cat: “Anyone that's covering sports who thinks, 'I do very, very important work'…you deserve to be clowned.” [10:26]
• They read and lampoon outraged tweets from “Big J” journalists, especially a verbose analogy about professionalism and suits [12:42].
• Kate proposes a more human touch: "I just like to see a little humanity. There’s people dying, Kim, okay?" [18:52]
• Spirited defense and mocking of sportswriters who take their job too seriously—especially their "codes" and "professional norms."
• Connor: “Who wrote the rules, by the way, on sports journalism?...These are the rules, god dammit!” [16:15]

3. Pittsburgh Steelers Fan Cycle & Mike Tomlin News

• Brandon and Big Cat discuss the never-ending cycle of Steelers fandom and Mike Tomlin’s fate as head coach amidst rumors of his departure. [50:00+]
  • Big Cat: "It's always the same. It doesn't matter who's on the team." [50:36]
  • When the news breaks that Tomlin is reportedly stepping down, the crew reacts live [66:11+], debating job desirability and comparing the Steelers’ coaching longevity to Papal succession.

4. The “Hot Guy Friday” Debate—Who’s the Hottest Nick?

• Hyping "Hot Guy Friday" where Big Cat will bring in his “male crush,” Nick—sparks comparison wars about office hotties [24:44 – 34:00]:
  • Big Cat: “I showed my wife him, and she was not blown away…” [25:00]
  • Eddie doubts Nick’s hotness, claiming “he’s not even the hottest with that name in this office,” leading to a parade of Nicks and a feisty debate on male attractiveness.
  • “Let me ask just a simple question… do you have a six-pack? Oh. Because my guy does.” — Big Cat [30:09]

5. Absurd Story Time: “The Expired Lobster Incident”

• Steven Cheah retells his infamous “expired lobster” story—with the group grilling him for plausibility [63:34 – 78:00]. Did he really drop a “solid log” while playing basketball, unnoticed?
  • “If KB told me he was abducted by aliens, I’d have fewer questions.” —Connor Griffin [76:34]
  • Group refers to the story as "the JFK assassination" for the absurd detail analysis it receives.
  • Jay: “Why would I lie about pooping my pants?” [64:10]

6. Announcing the Connor Griffin Dating Show

• Bumble is sponsoring the next house dating show, with Connor Griffin as the eligible bachelor [88:43+].
  • The panel covers everything from dealbreakers (ugly, bad hygiene, family issues), willingness to date outside Chicago, thoughts on tattoos ("I struggle with tattoos. Not trying to figure out my thoughts..."), and rapid-fire questions on age, body type, interests, and whether he'd date a Cowboys fan.
  • Kate offers to “sprinkle in one predator” to keep things interesting. [89:43]
  • “You can't think of a turnoff?” –Connor Griffin is put on the spot about his preferences and gives little away, leading to much group frustration and teasing. [99:52]
  • Theoretical discussion about having to break hearts on camera and whether Steven Cheah would do the ‘dumping’ for him.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Sports Journalism & the Jaguars Viral Press Conference:

• “Anybody that's covering sports that is like, I do very, very important work. You're a bozo and you deserve to be clowned.” —Connor Griffin [10:25]
• “Full stop is one of those trigger words… Or full stop, and also, 'I don't know who needs to hear this.' Or the clapping emojis for period.” —Big Cat [13:37]
• “This should be standard practice in the NFL. Every playoff loss should open with the losing coach getting a pep talk.” —Connor Griffin [12:23]
• “I think we need to do a better job in society today because everyone’s online…every now and then just be like, 'I don’t care.'” —Big Cat [11:26]

On the Dating Show and Preference Debacles:

• "One is like, ugly. Like, ugly..." —Connor Griffin on dealbreakers [89:19]
• "I want to see how you ejaculate... Well, you said you're open to everything." —Big Cat (teasing Connor on his stated open-mindedness) [97:12]
• "Would you date someone that's 21?" —Big Cat [95:12]
  "Yeah, for the sake...yeah. Just to see where it goes. Sure." —Connor
• "Are you interested in guys?" —Big Cat
  "No." —Marshall [93:00]
• "If you notice you don't like women with tattoos..." —Eddie
  "I don't dislike people with tattoos. I've dated…" —Connor
  (Group: endless frustration as Connor gives only vague, diplomatic answers) [105:02]

On Wild Bathroom & Bodily Function Stories:

• “Why would I lie about pooping my pants?” —Jay [64:10]
• Connor on the plausibility: "If KB told me he was abducted by aliens, I'd have fewer questions." [76:34]
• “The angrier you get, the more of a lie it seems.” —Eddie [79:42]

On Steelers Fandom:

• “It's the same every time. It doesn't matter who's on the team.” —Big Cat [50:34]
• “That’s a crazy, crazy stat…the Steelers are now looking for a new head coach for the third time since 1969.” —Big Cat [70:02]

Miscellaneous Standouts:

• "Let me ask just a simple question...do you have a six-pack?" —Big Cat evaluating office hotness [30:09]
• “There have been more Popes than Steelers head coaches since 19…” —Connor (on the rarity of Steelers coaching changes) [69:27]
• “Coaches as desserts: Tomlin is a chips ahoy cookie." —Big Cat & crew [52:11]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment / Topic | |------------|-------------------------------------------| | 04:43 | Food delivery scam, stock photo discussion | | 06:46 | Kate's robotic pizza delivery story | | 10:00–13:00| Jaguars press conference viral moment | | 24:44–34:00| Hot Guy Friday: the “Nick” attractiveness debate | | 50:00–56:06| Steelers, Mike Tomlin job, and NFL coach discussion | | 63:34–78:00| Steven Cheah’s expired lobster/shitting story | | 88:43–106:20| The Connor Griffin Dating Show details, rapid-fire questions | | 106:36–end | Wrap-up, final dating show planning, final bits |

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Episode Tone & Takeaway

This episode is quintessential Yak: noisy, joyous, off-the-wall, with constant diversions from serious to stupid, overlapped with genuinely funny insights about sports media, fandom, and group dynamics. If you’re not up to speed with Barstool’s internal characters, some in-jokes may fly past, but the headlines—clowning sports journalists, dropping plans for a new dating contest, and relentless debate about basic preferences—make for an engaging hour-plus of absurd entertainment.

For listeners: Get ready for the next big Barstool Yak dating show—applications coming soon for anyone who thinks they’re a fit for the affable but frustratingly noncommittal Connor Griffin.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Brandon Walker]

Hey yak listeners. You can find every episode on Apple, podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.

[Marshall]

Out on the course, they're the PGA Tour's best players. But in the arena, they're prime time. And season two of TGL, presented by SoFi, is back with lights, cameras, action. We're talking big moments, big personalities, big names in the stands, all on the big screen. Big time matchups with shot clocks, Hammer drops, timeouts, overtime and playoffs. It's city versus city, squad versus squad. This sport just hits different under the lights. It's TGL, presented by SoFi.

[Big Cat]

Keep up. It's golf.

[Marshall]

Tune in to every match, only on espn. Out on the course, they're the PGA Tour's best players. But in the arena, they're prime time. And season two of TGL, presented by SoFi, is back with lights, cameras, action. We're talking big moments, big personalities, big names in the stands, all on the big screen. Big time matchups with shot clocks, camera drops, timeouts, overtime, and playoffs. It's city versus city, city squad versus squad. This sport just hits different under the lights. It's TGL, presented by SoFi.

[Big Cat]

Keep up. It's golf.

[Marshall]

Tune in to every match, only on espn.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm the coolest one out of all of us.

[Big Cat]

That was incredible.

[Brandon Walker]

Hello.

[Big Cat]

It's the Yak. Where the Is everyone? Oh, okay. Well, we have our free lunch day on Tuesdays.

[Marshall]

That's right.

[Connor Griffin]

Here comes Brandon.

[Big Cat]

Here comes Brandon. Here comes big Customer. West Point, Mississippi.

[Connor Griffin]

What are those shoes?

[Big Cat]

Six, six, 250 pounds.

[Brandon Walker]

Those have, like, the mouse track balls in them. Interesting.

[Connor Griffin]

Those look like the.

[Eddie]

I got some new shoes.

[Connor Griffin]

Is it the Penny Hardaways that had, like, the big bubbles? They're pretty cool. It's like a knockoff.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, the Matrix 5000 Neo. Looks like you'd wear those.

[Eddie]

Well, they're Air Maxes. They're, they're good shoes. I don't know why we're making. They got the bubbles in them, though.

[Big Cat]

Too many bubbles.

[Kyle]

The bubbles are cool.

[Eddie]

Yeah, thanks. Also, I'm wearing new shoes. Hello.

[Brandon Walker]

Just plain white socks, though.

[Eddie]

Yeah, I did go white socks today. I think that's, I, I brought fancy socks, but I, I, I did a workout, so I didn't, I didn't put the fancy socks on.

[Brandon Walker]

That makes perfect sense.

[Eddie]

They're bubbled, right?

[Jay]

Bubbled up?

[Eddie]

Yeah, I'm bubbled up.

[Connor Griffin]

You get a little bounce.

[Eddie]

The little bounce. Not a lot of bounce. I'm not going to try to bounce on them, but if I Needed the bounce. I have it.

[Big Cat]

You do tricks on it.

[Eddie]

Would you like to touch them, Kyle?

[Big Cat]

Touch them. They're fun. Okay, you can do some tricks on it.

[Eddie]

I. I could. They're just standard shoes that they're really. They don't require the show to come to a halt.

[Titus]

Speaking of tricks on it, you passed me by. I couldn't help but notice there's come all over your ass again.

[Eddie]

These are my come pants.

[Titus]

But it was a different spot this time.

[Eddie]

It's not a difference.

[Titus]

I think it's different.

[Brandon Walker]

How set it in. Is that stain?

[Eddie]

I don't know. I washed them.

[Big Cat]

Let me see.

[Eddie]

I think it's hair gel. I don't know, but it won't I wash. Could we not. What?

[Brandon Walker]

Don't. Not this.

[Big Cat]

Oh, man, that you. Why, though?

[Titus]

Nickelodeon logo just come like.

[Eddie]

I. I love these paints.

[Brandon Walker]

Also, you stood up and a silica gel pack fell out of your ass.

[Marshall]

Keeping it fresh.

[Eddie]

Stand up.

[Brandon Walker]

There's a silica gel pack it fell out of.

[Big Cat]

Are you making beef jerky in your pockets?

[Eddie]

Why?

[Brandon Walker]

Is there too much moisture in your ass crack?

[Marshall]

Kate.

[Eddie]

Kate's here. Hey, Kate.

[Kate]

You know, a little bit of lemon juice and Don gets come right out.

[Brandon Walker]

No kidding.

[Eddie]

Really?

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Titus]

I don't know about this stain, though.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, this stain set in show the audience. Right?

[Kyle]

It does it, actually, because I'm curious.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah, the acid.

[Eddie]

You know, Google how to get calm out before.

[Kate]

No, I've never tried to get it out.

[Big Cat]

Right. Just wear white. Try to get it in.

[Kate]

All right, ladies.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Why are you laughing like Peter Griffin?

[Kyle]

Today's free lunch. Well, I didn't get to see it.

[Jay]

What is it?

[Eddie]

Pasta.

[Big Cat]

Oh, thanks for telling us that you don't eat the free lunch.

[Kyle]

I don't know.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it was pasta.

[Kate]

This was so good.

[Big Cat]

It was very good.

[Kate]

So good.

[Big Cat]

Pasta la vista or something.

[Eddie]

I. I'd be forgetting, though, because I did get my Chick Fil A. Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Tuesdays. Tuesdays until the rest of time.

[Brandon Walker]

I ordered a salad and I'm the dumbest guy on Earth because. No, because it said marked as delivered. And I looked at the picture. I was like, oh, they must have delivered it across the street. And so I was walking around outside with the security guard around the block looking for a white door, and he was like, show me the picture. And I looked at it. There's just like a watermark on it. It is just a screenshot of somebody's computer. There's a watermark across the bag.

[Big Cat]

Oh, wait. Sweet.

[Kyle]

He played you.

[Marshall]

Played me?

[Connor Griffin]

Played you Hard dudes who do that.

[Kyle]

Get like, get away with that, I guess.

[Kate]

What do they do with it?

[Big Cat]

Why the do they want to get the tip?

[Brandon Walker]

I don't follow up. I got my money back.

[Big Cat]

Oh, okay.

[Titus]

Yeah, you get your money back. But do they get penalized?

[Brandon Walker]

I don't think.

[Jay]

Right. Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

That can't be a lucrative three dollar tip.

[Brandon Walker]

And then they're picked.

[Eddie]

And a salad.

[Jay]

But I get.

[Connor Griffin]

They get the salad. They do get the free salad.

[Brandon Walker]

That's nice.

[Eddie]

$3 for eating free lunch.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

And then they do. They lose their job.

[Brandon Walker]

I think they probably just sign up for Door dash or grubhub, which is like a different identity.

[Big Cat]

They hop around. Yeah. I bet you they do hit. Every now and then they'll hit someone who just doesn't complain.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, yeah.

[Big Cat]

It's like sometimes I'll order food and just. And be like, if it doesn't come. That's probably not the worst thing because I probably shouldn't have ordered this.

[Kyle]

People who order delivery probably don't care as much about money.

[Big Cat]

Well, not even that. It's just like there's sometimes I'll do an order and I'll be like, yeah, I probably shouldn't be eating this for lunch. So if it doesn't show up, it's not. Yeah, the world telling me, hey, you shouldn't have done that.

[Connor Griffin]

Are there any food places doing their own delivery these days?

[Brandon Walker]

I think pizza places are still hanging.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah, some pizza places will.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Throw the little logo on the top of your car.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Titus]

You still see the domino's car with the bag.

[Kyle]

Actually, no, I haven't seen one.

[Connor Griffin]

I haven't seen here. I haven't seen.

[Brandon Walker]

When was the last time YouTube perfect bodies ordered Domino's?

[Kyle]

Oh my God.

[Connor Griffin]

I guess. Yeah. Guys like us.

[Big Cat]

Have you guys ordered anything from the robots?

[Brandon Walker]

Coco.

[Big Cat]

Is that what they are?

[Kate]

Against my will.

[Big Cat]

You have.

[Kate]

I ordered from a expensive ass pizza place in town. And then I watched it. It'll show up as the robot. And I watch as it took a hour to go half a mile. And then pizza was cold and floppy.

[Brandon Walker]

I saw one run into a pole.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

I always wave to him though.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

No, my kids love seeing them.

[Kate]

It was worth it.

[Jay]

That was my.

[Big Cat]

I'm so stupid. Oh my God. Wait, how much lunch did you think you ordered?

[Brandon Walker]

That's the thing. I like other. I thought that he just was doing other deliveries and put mine with it.

[Big Cat]

That's the fakest picture ever. Zoom in.

[Brandon Walker]

Bunch of groceries, say Alamy. So first of all, it's not even a screenshot.

[Eddie]

It's.

[Brandon Walker]

Somebody took a picture of their computer screen. Dreamstime.com.

[Big Cat]

Wait, can we do a reverse image search and figure out where this came from originated?

[Brandon Walker]

Well, it's from Dreamstime.com, the cheaper shutter stock.

[Big Cat]

Is that what it is?

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Dreamtime.

[Connor Griffin]

That's funny.

[Brandon Walker]

But like, he didn't even screenshot. It's like a picture of a computer screen.

[Big Cat]

He just got his reflection. He got you from start to finish.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

And you pre tipped.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

You could take it away.

[Marshall]

I got it all.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

I got it all back in credits. So it'll just happen again.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm so stupid. Was walking around the cold.

[Titus]

I don't know, though. That guy is not getting the benefit of the doubt. They see he was clearly. It wasn't like an accident or anything. He uploaded a licensed picture.

[Brandon Walker]

I don't think he gives a shit.

[Big Cat]

No, Getting.

[Connor Griffin]

Getting got sucks.

[Big Cat]

It really does.

[Connor Griffin]

It sucks so much. The. The feeling of like, I'm a fucking idiot. How did this happen?

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Getting got online. Oh, brutal. You just sit there and you're just like, God damn it, why didn't I use my brain on this one?

[Kyle]

Yeah, it seems to happen to you a lot.

[Big Cat]

Well, I. The cope I use is that you're not properly doing your job unless you're getting got. Like it's going hard in the paint. Like, you're gonna have to foul. You're gonna have to get fouled. That's just the cost of doing business.

[Connor Griffin]

That's right.

[Big Cat]

We did have a little stretch, though, where Dom had sent me like two or three fakes in a row, and I didn't even look at him. I just, like, retweeted him. And yeah, that was bad. We had to have a little talk. Just really, really. Oh, yeah. 100. I told him that. I was like, you're my sterling reputation online as someone who gets all facts right. Has been tarnished.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

That's got to be really scary for the reporters. Like, you get one thing wrong, you're done.

[Brandon Walker]

Tarnished.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Like what. What was the. Was it who did Arson judge to the. To the Giants? Is that Haymon?

[Eddie]

No.

[Big Cat]

Might have been.

[Eddie]

Hater.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah, I remember what you're talking about.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. You tried to get it out so fast, and then it wasn't. None of it was right. Arson judge to the job.

[Kyle]

Well, do they get penalized for that.

[Big Cat]

Or they get fired of public opinion? That's.

[Connor Griffin]

In that sense.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. There it is. Arson judge appears headed to Giants. None of that was right.

[Kyle]

So Aaron Judge stayed with the ink. Yeah, I knew that.

[Big Cat]

What's up, everyone?

[Brandon Walker]

News breakers. Those are your guys.

[Marshall]

Tightest.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

You love them.

[Connor Griffin]

Well, it's just I, I think this Jaguars situation has illuminated what my ultimate issue is.

[Big Cat]

Explain the situation for people who don't.

[Connor Griffin]

Know, the people that don't know. There's the Jaguars press conference after the Jags lost to the Bills. And the lady, just the start of the press conference. Liam Cohen's just up there at the podium and she just gives, like, a pep talk, which was incredible. It was just like out of nowhere. And the big Jays are losing their mind about.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

And I, I realize it's not. The reason I hate the scoops guys so much is because I just hate any sports journalist that believes that what they do is important, basically.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Anybody that's, like, covering sports that is like, I do very, very important work. You're a bozo and you deserve to be clowned. And that's what happened with the Jaguars lady.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

That, like, all these, all these people are like, that's so unprofessional.

[Kyle]

She hyped him up. It was like, yeah, very.

[Eddie]

You see the.

[Kate]

Very wholesome.

[Brandon Walker]

It was.

[Kate]

Yeah, it was really like.

[Connor Griffin]

It was awesome.

[Eddie]

Congratulations on your success, man. You hold your head up. All right? You guys have had a most magnificent season.

[Jay]

Thank you.

[Eddie]

You did a great job out there today. So you just hold your head up. Okay. And ladies and gentlemen, Duvall, you the one. All right. You keep it going. We got another season. Okay. Take care. And much continued success to you and the entire team. That's amazing.

[Connor Griffin]

That's so cool.

[Kyle]

Is that breaking unwritten rules or etiquette?

[Connor Griffin]

I guess so.

[Eddie]

Among the big J journalists, you have to ask them.

[Kyle]

How did it feel out there?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. No, we were saying on week of bars, some guys sitting in the back of that room. Like, I was just about to ask him to talk about the third down decision, and now I can't.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, she ruined.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

The third.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

That.

[Kyle]

What was going through your head?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I, I, My take on this one was I, I think we need to do a better job in society today because everyone's online and there's. Everyone's got a take and everyone's got an opinion. You got to be able to every now and then just be like, I don't care.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I mean, I don't care that she did that. I don't really care. I didn't think it was that, like, remarkable. I did. I had no strong opinion one way or the Other, I don't think the.

[Connor Griffin]

Big Jays didn't care either. And they made it known on every. On their numerous tweets.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Like, I don't care one way or another.

[Big Cat]

Right.

[Connor Griffin]

But you care.

[Marshall]

Right? Right.

[Big Cat]

It's okay to just be like, okay, that happened.

[Connor Griffin]

Read my paragraphs.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Of why this could be a problem.

[Kyle]

Yeah. Everyone has to have an extreme opinion.

[Big Cat]

Right. It's like sometimes you could just say, cool, move along.

[Brandon Walker]

Who's anti compliment the big Js. What did he say?

[Big Cat]

They were upset.

[Eddie]

Stan Verrett had three or four tweets about it. A lot of. A lot of sports reporters had. Jeff Pearlman had a four minute tick tock on it.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Like, it's just. What you're doing is not that serious.

[Connor Griffin]

I think this should be standard practice in the NFL. I think every playoff loss should open with the losing coach getting a pep talk.

[Big Cat]

Well, someone pointed out, like, could you imagine how great of a clip it would have been if someone did that to Belichick after. Oh, yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Oh, yeah.

[Eddie]

We need it.

[Kyle]

It was the perfect two people like some white dill weed. Couldn't have gotten away with that.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. No. Definitely not. Here's an analogy about the Jackson reporter situation. Let's say you're expected to wear a suit to work. If you showed up in shorts, you violated workplace nor. That is true. Even if you look better in shorts, people like seeing you in them. And people who point out to the departure from these norms don't hate shorts. Are people who wear shorts.

[Eddie]

All right, dude, eight sentences. Yeah, just about.

[Connor Griffin]

He fired off like eight tweets. And then one of them was finally to be clear. I'm not upset about this.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, that's.

[Kate]

Oh, my God.

[Big Cat]

He's still going.

[Kate]

Is this a real person?

[Big Cat]

I think reporter in Jacksonville had said, coach, I'm glad your team lost. And I don't think you're the right coach. And they will probably continue to lose. Can't wait for you to leave Duval. Almost anyone would understand it was the wrong setting for that. What she said was sweet, endearing, and positive. It was still outside professional norms for a reporter. We're not here to berate, console, or cheer. We're there to ask questions to enhance coverage. Full stop. Full stop.

[Kate]

Stop.

[Brandon Walker]

What a square.

[Big Cat]

Full stop is one of those triggers the. Or full stop. And also, I don't know who needs to hear this or the clapping emojis for period.

[Brandon Walker]

What about all the Bears fans say? The packers fans saying that? Enjoy it, Bears. This was your Super Bowl.

[Eddie]

I Don't like that one.

[Brandon Walker]

That's a lot.

[Marshall]

You see that a lot.

[Big Cat]

That also is like, I. Whatever. Because I actually, I called into Bob Does Sports, was doing a stream in cutsy, who's a great guy, was. Is a Packers fan. And he said that to me. And I said, so you're admitting the Bears won the Super Bowl? I was like, wait a second. But you just said, we won the Super Bowl.

[Connor Griffin]

I think that's. It's a coat move, no matter what. But, like, to do that in the regular season, I guess you could maybe make an argument, let's do it at a playoff game. Like, in the regular season, you'd be like, it's funny that you guys cared so much. We don't even care because we're getting geared up for the playoff. You know, you could argue that sort of thing.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

One time.

[Connor Griffin]

But there's no world where the packers weren't trying to win.

[Big Cat]

Right.

[Connor Griffin]

I mean, you know, like, it was their Super Bowl.

[Big Cat]

Right.

[Connor Griffin]

They were also trying to win the Super Bowl.

[Big Cat]

The. We did. We did. At the end of week 18 on PMT, we did everyone's super bowl who didn't make the playoffs. Because I feel like it's actually nice to look back at and be like, oh, you remember when you, like, the Falcons beat the Bills on Monday Night Football and went like 4 and 2? That was their Super Bowl. Looking back at it, everyone should get.

[Eddie]

A Super bowl every year.

[Big Cat]

Sports suck. Here's your Super Bowl.

[Kyle]

Too hard.

[Brandon Walker]

But it's always deemed their super bowl after they win.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Not before. Although it was kind of before. It was kind of hard.

[Brandon Walker]

Was that.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

They're not so wrong.

[Kyle]

Y' all done the same.

[Brandon Walker]

Danny, was that Super Bowl.

[Big Cat]

It was a big.

[Titus]

Not that great. Like a rival in a postseason game.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

We're gonna be happy as owned you forever.

[Titus]

Yeah. But I think. Yeah. That's such, like, a transparent coping thing that I don't think.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. And the people mad about Ben Johnson are just. Oh, I love that he didn't. That he doubled down. Right.

[Titus]

And it's like anyone who's mad at that, you know, they would be cheering for it if it was their coach who did it.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. And it's the. It's like getting in a. Like. Like getting in a competition. Losing and then being like, I didn't care anyway. Okay, well, then why do we compete?

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Titus]

Like these journalists were doing.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. I love. Oh, man. The big change. I think they're also just. I think the journalists are just. They're very Threatened these days.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

By their existence because of the fact that, like, back in the day, the. The local, like, lead columnist was the guy, you know, he basically set the tone.

[Jay]

He.

[Big Cat]

He had the take and everyone went with that take. Now there's so many outlets and so many people creating content, they probably feel a little threatened.

[Connor Griffin]

Who wrote the rules, by the way, on Journal, on sports journalism? Because they all, like, refer to the code. Where did the code come from?

[Brandon Walker]

Who's the father?

[Connor Griffin]

How did this start? Where this. These are the rules. God damn it.

[Big Cat]

And it's very funny because again, it's not. We're not talking about real journalists, like, Exactly. People who are exposing, like, corruption or, like, you know, stories from war that I get. Like, you gotta have some rules. This is just a game.

[Connor Griffin]

It's a game.

[Kyle]

Syracuse needs more bullies.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kyle]

They should ship them in ransom bullies.

[Big Cat]

That new house Syracuse should have, like, they should. They should do. Because they have their journalism school. They should have like a tick tock school. And it's just like, cool, hot people. They're like, I'm gonna take your job.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Just so they can get used to it, you know? Yeah. I'm gonna have a YouTube show. I'm gonna swear. And you're not gonna be able to.

[Kyle]

There's just want to give them like an industrial noogie with machinery. Attach them to a clamp, a factory clamp. They need that in their skin. Industrial.

[Brandon Walker]

They need to strap their underwear to like a. Like an automated flag.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Just a constant. Yeah. Like the. The JFK Forever flame. It's a forever toilet.

[Kyle]

Always, always, always going. They're always ask you forever toilet.

[Big Cat]

Dunk your head in there. You do too.

[Kyle]

Well, at Syracuse Journalism School, you go to the forever toilet, if you're over.

[Big Cat]

3.7 GPA, it's straight to the forever toilet. There's just a behemoth of a man ready to dunk your little frail body.

[Jay]

Oh, shout out to Adam Schefter, though, because he had a similar opinion as Titus.

[Connor Griffin]

Oh.

[Jay]

He was the first person to amplify it. Called an awesome exchange, which triggered a lot of.

[Big Cat]

But see that I. I don't care about that either. I don't think it was that awesome.

[Connor Griffin]

You're right.

[Kyle]

It wasn't that.

[Big Cat]

It was just a thing.

[Eddie]

It was awesome. In the face of the backlash. The. The fact that the backlash exists and people were like, this is how you should actually act. No, it was. It's awesome the fact that it triggered that and it triggered people to be emotional and defensive of a. Of a occupation that isn't that serious.

[Big Cat]

Right.

[Eddie]

I go back retro and look at her like, okay, well, that's awesome.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

That makes it cool.

[Big Cat]

You wait for their move and then you counter move. Yes.

[Titus]

Like, how much would it have changed if she threw in a question at the end?

[Eddie]

Lynn Jones is her name, by the way.

[Big Cat]

Jones. Shout out Lynn Jones.

[Kate]

Also, I think dudes take sports a little seriously.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Kate]

So it's nice to see it's. People get a little angrier than, like. It's like, okay, nobody's. There's people that are dying, Kim. Okay. Chill out. And I just like to see a little humanity. Dash.

[Eddie]

I had to be in those rooms for 15 years, and nobody likes to smell their own farts like sportswriters.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

And I hated it. I hated it then. And I got lucky and got out of it, but I still hate it.

[Jay]

I also think it changes a little bit because she has been on the Jaguars coverage for 30 years, since the team became a real.

[Kate]

It's not objective.

[Jay]

She can do what she wants shooting for.

[Big Cat]

So if she was a newbie. Yeah.

[Jay]

I think it would get a lot more backlash.

[Connor Griffin]

Connor Griffin hates her guts. You ask him why? He says, because she's not hot.

[Marshall]

Wouldn't.

[Big Cat]

Her hands aren't.

[Connor Griffin]

That's what he said.

[Brandon Walker]

I think it's fine to pick up a grown man that's about to cry. Personally, I think.

[Big Cat]

I think he.

[Kyle]

Do you think he deserved to hear that?

[Big Cat]

No, I think he.

[Kyle]

I think he did.

[Big Cat]

No.

[Eddie]

Jacksonville did a hell of a job.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. But I think he knows he did a hell of a job. I don't think he needed to be told that.

[Eddie]

I think.

[Connor Griffin]

I think you appreciate some positive feedback. His face was, like, lighting up as she kept going like he did. Like, oh, wow.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Brandon Walker]

What was the last time Brandon? Somebody was like, you did a damn good job.

[Eddie]

Oh, my God. So 2004.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah. What was it?

[Connor Griffin]

Okay.

[Eddie]

I just made it up.

[Brandon Walker]

I put you on the spot.

[Eddie]

So we.

[Big Cat]

So what we need to do is we just need to have every press conference start with, anyone got any compliments or questions?

[Brandon Walker]

I think in order to ask a question, you have to give a compliment.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Clement Wheel.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

I. I just say I think a compliment from an older black lady feels better than any other compliment.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Right.

[Eddie]

They're just way better. They're way better at complimenting than anybody else is what.

[Kyle]

That's what we're dealing with.

[Eddie]

Just tell him, young man. And like, you. Like I. Yeah.

[Titus]

They call you baby.

[Eddie]

Yeah. If that were. If that were a 32 year old white woman. I don't know if it was just like a.

[Big Cat]

When it's reversed, like when coaches compliment the reporters, they love that. It. When they'll be like, oh, I know you, Kevin. Like, oh, didn't you say that last week? Yeah, they eat that up.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah, they do, huh?

[Titus]

Maybe she was just like sucking up to him. So now next time she'll get called first.

[Eddie]

Lynn Jones, don't suck up.

[Big Cat]

Nah, I would. Like if, like next year they, they loot. They have a really bad year. If she's like, yeah, all that I said last year sucked.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

I was wrong.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Just keep that same energy.

[Eddie]

Lynn, get the out of here.

[Brandon Walker]

That's what she has to do.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Be real.

[Eddie]

I think she would.

[Big Cat]

I don't think she would. I think she's dog football.

[Eddie]

I think Lynn. I think Lynn tells it like it is.

[Brandon Walker]

She hasn't done it. Has she ever.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, she has. She's had many chances to do that.

[Eddie]

I don't know. I haven't been around Lynn Jones.

[Kyle]

That's the problem. This should have just happened.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, thanks.

[Kyle]

Lynn Jones is gonna be like some Donald Trump.

[Big Cat]

That's what I'm saying. It's just the thing that should have just happened and we should have had no takes.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Just happened.

[Eddie]

I disagree. Whenever I can dunk on sports writers that take themselves too seriously, I'm going to take that opportunity.

[Connor Griffin]

Same.

[Eddie]

Fuck them. Fuck them is what I say.

[Connor Griffin]

Fuck them.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Yeah. So then we disagree.

[Eddie]

Unless you're saying they shouldn't have had the takes and then I shouldn't have been able to react to it. In that case, it's still their fault.

[Connor Griffin]

We were talking about it earlier, like the big Js. How far does the impartial partial personality, how far does that go? Like if. If you're walking into the press conference and the coach is walking behind you, can you hold the door for them? Can you show like common courtesy?

[Big Cat]

No.

[Connor Griffin]

Or do you have to like slam the door in their face?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. You can't do.

[Connor Griffin]

Can you?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah. It is very funny to be like, we still are humans so you can still have a relationship. Although I didn't go to journalism school, so I don't know.

[Jay]

What was the thing you had with Peter King where you like, like bought him a meal like, and he wasn't supposed to have.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah, he owes me money. Well, that's because he. We were at Niners camp and we were hanging out and we were doing Grit Week and he was there, and we were all sitting, waiting to interview some people. And I was like, all right, well, we gotta get lunch. So I went to In N Out. I was like, peter, what do you want? I think he got two hamburgers and I bought him for him. And then like a year later, he bashed barstool. And I was like, well, dude, pay me the money back. This is. You got a free burger and then you bash it.

[Marshall]

No fry, no cheese.

[Brandon Walker]

If somebody's picking up food for you that you'd kind of know, you can't be a glutton.

[Connor Griffin]

No, you got to say a number. Say, give me the number one. Give me the number two, Give me the number three.

[Big Cat]

And then he bashed us, like, bro.

[Eddie]

If a man buys you a burger, you can't ever bash that.

[Big Cat]

Right?

[Kate]

It's a code.

[Big Cat]

Like, I don't like this bar stool. Well, you like those burgers, buddy. Yeah, he kind of owns you.

[Kyle]

That's the worst. Did he go animal style?

[Big Cat]

I think he might have.

[Brandon Walker]

This man had you ordering off the secret menu.

[Big Cat]

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[Eddie]

Oh, hot, hot guy Friday.

[Connor Griffin]

Yep.

[Big Cat]

I've been in touch with him.

[Brandon Walker]

How's he text?

[Big Cat]

We're Instagram dming. I told him we gotta get. We gotta wear our best fit. We gotta maybe get a tan.

[Eddie]

So you're nervous? He's not hot enough.

[Big Cat]

I showed my wife him and she was not blown away.

[Titus]

Oh.

[Big Cat]

Oh, no, dear dude. And I'm like, I just can't believe I had a moment last night when I was going to bed and I was like, what did I do? What did I. I'm bringing in my crush. My male crush.

[Kyle]

Tonight is coming.

[Big Cat]

I met for, like 20 seconds.

[Kyle]

Yep. Your weakness. Your forever weakness.

[Big Cat]

I think he's gonna deliver. I really do.

[Connor Griffin]

Meanwhile, Eddie is under undercutting you.

[Kyle]

Ed doesn't.

[Connor Griffin]

Eddie does not believe at all.

[Eddie]

He's in business.

[Big Cat]

He's just trying to prove to everyone how straight he is. We get it, dude.

[Kate]

Are we still doing them in the clump of normies? Because I think that matters.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. I think he's bringing his friends.

[Kate]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

So it actually would be the same setting that I saw him.

[Kate]

Okay.

[Jay]

Okay.

[Brandon Walker]

This guy has a pretty common name. Your crush.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Your boy toy. And Eddie said he's not even the hottest of that name in this office.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. That's crazy.

[Kyle]

He said he's one rung because what.

[Connor Griffin]

He said when he is here, he won't even be the hottest guy with that name while he's here. That's crazy.

[Kate]

Mincy.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Brandon Walker]

His name is.

[Big Cat]

His name is Mince.

[Brandon Walker]

And Che, did you have his number saved in your phone and it popped up on your car?

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Che, what are you doing?

[Jay]

So I see. What?

[Big Cat]

What are you doing? What do you mean?

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, what were you.

[Jay]

Okay.

[Kyle]

You're in contact.

[Jay]

Yes. So one of his friends DM'd me yesterday because Big Head said, send all this stuff my way and include his number. He said, like, he's good to talk to you. So I reached out. That's how he found it. He was on a plane yesterday. We started texting. I saved him my phone as.

[Big Cat]

We.

[Jay]

Could just say his first name, right? Like it doesn't matter.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Jay]

Nick, Big Cat's crush. And I just did that. I was driving my kids home yesterday and I got a text from him that was like, hey, do you have a few minutes to talk? But it appeared on Apple Carplay as Nick, Big Cat's crush. And my young kids who know Big Cat are like, what does that say? Who's Nick's Big Cat's crush? And so that was an uncomfortable discussion. But then I talked to Nick on the phone, and multiple times he said the phrase, and I'm quoting this, I'm willing to stretch this as far as Big Cat likes.

[Brandon Walker]

What is. What's he stretching?

[Big Cat]

That's what I like. That's what I like hearing from my crush.

[Kyle]

Big Stephen Shea is your liaison of gay sex affairs.

[Brandon Walker]

Jay, that's VP of football.

[Kyle]

Richards, that's your coordinating. Preparing orgasm points. Seminal releases.

[Jay]

So he seems down for whatever. So this is. This should be fun on Friday.

[Big Cat]

So nervous.

[Brandon Walker]

And there's a sales guy, Nick, who Eddie is dead set. Is better looking.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. We got to get him in here too. I. I don't think Nick, I don't think he's hot. He's a fine looking guy's a good looking guy, but is it that standard?

[Eddie]

Standard attract? I don't think he's.

[Connor Griffin]

Isn't that proof to Eddie's point that if he, if Nick Addison's better looking than Dan.

[Marshall]

Wait, is Eddie gay?

[Eddie]

Proves he has a crush on Nick.

[Brandon Walker]

Eddie has a crush on.

[Connor Griffin]

Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Kyle]

A lot on the line.

[Connor Griffin]

I'll defend Eddie. Eddie never said Nick Addison was hot. Eddie said that Dan's guy is not as attractive as Nick Addison.

[Eddie]

But he had Nick Addison.

[Big Cat]

So hurtful to me.

[Kyle]

Be honest.

[Big Cat]

I just think you're in for a tough Friday.

[Eddie]

Jesus.

[Big Cat]

No, no, there's nothing against him. Like Jacob Elordi could walk in here.

[Eddie]

You think this guy's ugly as.

[Marshall]

No, no, no.

[Big Cat]

But Kyle's like, this is a high bar. Oh, me, like you're gonna be pointing out his dimples or something.

[Eddie]

So Nick Addison is more attractive than this Nick?

[Big Cat]

I think it's a good race.

[Connor Griffin]

Where's Nick Addison? On a scale of 1 to 10? So we get a frame of reference.

[Kate]

Yeah. In your mind, what is he?

[Big Cat]

Well, I, I don't have. I don't. I just have comparisons.

[Kate]

Don't be shy.

[Titus]

So we really shouldn't sexualize our co.

[Connor Griffin]

Workers compared to, compared to sixes is Nick Addison.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah. I don't. I don't know. I mean, you guys know what he looks like too. I don't have to be the one to grade.

[Jay]

I don't know.

[Eddie]

I don't think he's that hot.

[Brandon Walker]

I think Nick Addison's a perfectly handsome man.

[Marshall]

Yeah, he's.

[Eddie]

He's solid. He's solid.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

How would you rate him?

[Eddie]

Brandon N. If this guy isn't better than Nick Addison, then he's not worth bringing in here. That's what I'll say.

[Kyle]

Yeah. There's a fine line between and disrupt your marriage and bring someone into your workplace.

[Big Cat]

Let me ask you question. Let me ask you a question, Eddie and maybe Nick Addison. Was he here? Yeah, he's here. Okay.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, you would know.

[Big Cat]

All right, here's Nick Addison. Okay, go into. Go sit where Stephen or. Yeah, you sit where Danny is for a second. We got. I got my crush coming in on Friday.

[Kyle]

So Big Cat's bad habit is coming in on Friday.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. And. And, and his name is Nick. And Eddie thinks that you're more attractive than this guy.

[Marshall]

But Eddie knows me.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. So it might Be a personality thing.

[Connor Griffin]

You.

[Big Cat]

You think Nick has. Might be office hot to you. Yeah, he might. Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Work husband.

[Connor Griffin]

Is this the hottest you can get? You can get hotter, right?

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, for sure. I.

[Eddie]

A haircut.

[Jay]

Clean up.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

I don't know. I mean, just about as hot as I put together.

[Big Cat]

Let me ask just a simple question, and I don't want to put anyone on the spot. Nick Addison, do you have a six pack?

[Marshall]

No.

[Big Cat]

Oh. Because my guy does.

[Kate]

He does.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

But I have been told, like, how many kids does he have? I don't know if he has any kids.

[Eddie]

How deep back in his Instagram did you go, Dan, that's not a good July 4th.

[Kyle]

How old is he?

[Big Cat]

I think he's probably 30ish. Young, 30s. He graduated high school in 2011, so. Okay, so maybe even a little older.

[Kyle]

32, 33.

[Big Cat]

Yes, like 33, 34. I think it was 11. He's gotten better with it.

[Kyle]

Got better with things.

[Big Cat]

I went all the way back.

[Kyle]

Okay. Full body.

[Eddie]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Look at me. You're not just with Big Cat.

[Jay]

That.

[Connor Griffin]

Do you think Dick Addison's more attractive than the big Cats guy?

[Big Cat]

I. Listen, here's the. Here's the issue. I talked. I talked to sources in his camp. He's hitting a tanning bed. Like he's coming. Yeah, well, I told him he's hitting the bed. Yeah, I told him. So I said, dude, we need you in your house.

[Kyle]

No, that's not fair.

[Big Cat]

So let me get. Let me get some. Some motion.

[Connor Griffin]

Nick on Friday. Yeah, he's got you.

[Big Cat]

We're having Nick. I told him he has to an hour ago.

[Kate]

Does this guy normally tan, or is he, like, judging himself just for Big Cat?

[Big Cat]

He. They said no, but he's gonna start.

[Kate]

He's gonna start.

[Eddie]

So this thing has now changed to a Nick competition.

[Brandon Walker]

No, this is suede.

[Big Cat]

This is.

[Marshall]

This isn't right.

[Brandon Walker]

We need him. As you say.

[Big Cat]

Listen, bronze medal's not that bad. Okay.

[Brandon Walker]

I don't know.

[Eddie]

Smokes.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, we do have a lot of Knicks.

[Eddie]

He's Charles for Soul Links.

[Big Cat]

All right. That's all we had. Nick. I just wanted.

[Marshall]

All right, boys.

[Brandon Walker]

I just wanted to take a peek.

[Eddie]

Good, good. Hot.

[Big Cat]

Danny, come back.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Nice boots.

[Kate]

He's got good boots on today. That's.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Height.

[Big Cat]

He's tall.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Six.

[Marshall]

Three.

[Eddie]

No, goddamn. Six. Three and a half.

[Kate]

Yes, he is.

[Eddie]

Whatever. Keep walking. I'm good.

[Kate]

Oh, Nick. Addison's feeling himself. As he should be.

[Eddie]

I guess so. That's Eddie's crush.

[Brandon Walker]

That's Ed's crush.

[Eddie]

All right.

[Big Cat]

I've heard people say they find him attractive. I was like, yeah, you're right.

[Brandon Walker]

Who said that?

[Eddie]

You. You.

[Big Cat]

It was you ratting those people out.

[Eddie]

What are you doing?

[Big Cat]

Oh, I'm just showing abs.

[Kyle]

Well, we're not going to see.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, we're not going to see his abs.

[Eddie]

Yeah, we might see his ass.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Can't rule out abs.

[Big Cat]

You're not concerned at all that you've hyped them up too much? Oh, I'm very concerned. This is a. This is the biggest day of my life. On Friday.

[Brandon Walker]

Could be the first day of your life.

[Big Cat]

Could be the first.

[Connor Griffin]

My hot guy from the BET gal is named Nick, too, by the way.

[Big Cat]

It's just the Nick. So is it. Is it. Every Nick is just super hot.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm Christopher now. Dude, I'm Christopher.

[Big Cat]

And none of you guys have gotten a sneak peek yet? No. Nobody.

[Eddie]

Don't want it.

[Big Cat]

Good. Good. Smart.

[Eddie]

Also, Titus, if you were to bring your neck in. That's not even close.

[Connor Griffin]

It won't even be close.

[Eddie]

That.

[Connor Griffin]

Dude, you know this guy. Guy. I'm showing you my guy.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I'd love to bet Gala.

[Brandon Walker]

Nick, he. He had, like, a magnetic pool, an.

[Eddie]

Aura in a glow.

[Connor Griffin]

Really?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. I think we're gonna go to the game.

[Connor Griffin]

That's Mike.

[Big Cat]

Oh, I think we gotta go to the game.

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Big Cat]

I mean, but this guy's like.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not. Yeah. Not fair. Yeah, it's a different game. Yeah, it's a different game altogether. I mean. I mean, look at that.

[Big Cat]

If you got professional pictures like that.

[Connor Griffin]

My guy's better than Dan.

[Big Cat]

No, that. You don't know. You don't know that.

[Kate]

Holy.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I don't know that this guy was a sexy vampire.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah. Are you kidding me?

[Brandon Walker]

In person.

[Connor Griffin]

Are you kidding me? Get a peek of that.

[Big Cat]

Oh, my God. Oh, wow. I mean, come on. What is he doing with that pose? Yeah, that's not.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Trying to. He's trying too hard.

[Brandon Walker]

Titus, see if he can get here by Friday.

[Connor Griffin]

I will. DM Him. Him.

[Big Cat]

That guy needs you.

[Kyle]

Is he taken?

[Big Cat]

My Nick? Yeah, he's married.

[Kyle]

Oh, that's right. That's right.

[Eddie]

So he'd be leaving his family, too.

[Big Cat]

Correct.

[Brandon Walker]

My Nick.

[Titus]

This guy's going to get a restraining order.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I think. I think we're going to go. Nice. And then we'll. We'll go to the. We'll go to their tailgate again. Perfect. Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Well, that's why.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Big Cat]

You're sick. That's the motivation. Good.

[Eddie]

Luck and the nick off.

[Big Cat]

No, it's good luck for us to go to.

[Eddie]

Oh, I see.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it's good luck for us to live together, Brandon.

[Connor Griffin]

You got to live around a nick. You have to have a nick in your life. Other than.

[Eddie]

I think I would just have to put forth terrain.

[Brandon Walker]

Thanks, man.

[Eddie]

Give it our best shot. Just give it a whirl, man.

[Connor Griffin]

We're gonna give the real a story.

[Brandon Walker]

Listen, we can see what happens.

[Eddie]

All we're gonna. We're gonna break you out of the gate just like everybody else, man. Somebody stumbles, we're right there.

[Connor Griffin]

While you play the game, anything could happen.

[Brandon Walker]

You make it to the elite eight, everybody loves you, then just UNC beat you by 82.

[Big Cat]

Did you see. Speaking of neighbors, did you see Mikey bet's been calling his neighbor the wrong name for eight years?

[Eddie]

Eight years.

[Big Cat]

That's crazy.

[Eddie]

How wrong.

[Connor Griffin]

Close.

[Kate]

Yeah, that's kind of the neighbor's fault at some point.

[Big Cat]

That's what he said, and I kind of agree with him. I think it was Derek or I. He's been calling him Derek, and his name's maybe Dylan. Last night, I was talking to my neighbor who had been calling him Derek for eight years. I was talking to my other neighbor. Today. It turns out Derek is actually named Darnell. Why the has he never said anything? I think I gotta stick with Derek until he addresses it. What the is his problem?

[Eddie]

Well, how'd he find out?

[Kate]

He was talking to his other neighbor, and he said the wrong name of the neighbor's. Like, that's not his name. The other neighbor.

[Big Cat]

That's crazy. Say the wrong name for.

[Eddie]

What if the other neighbor's with him?

[Big Cat]

Oh, what if Mikey bets is schizophrenic panic?

[Brandon Walker]

I think that's probably our best bet. That's.

[Big Cat]

That's on the table for sure.

[Eddie]

I do. Like, his first instinct was to blame the guy.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kate]

The is wrong with this guy. Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I mean, if someone calls you the wrong name for that long, I'm embarrassed.

[Brandon Walker]

Correcting.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

You reach a point I don't correct.

[Brandon Walker]

Because I know how bad they'd feel, so whatever.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, you're right on that.

[Titus]

There's probably a way to, like, casually throw it in there, though. Like, if you're like, oh, so I got this package has my name on it, Derek, blah, blah, blah. And then instead of being like, actually.

[Big Cat]

My buddy's wife's name is Alex, and he went to pick up a pizza under her name, and they call him Alex now, and he just won't correct them oh, no. What do you do?

[Kate]

Like, I'm stuck.

[Big Cat]

Gender. Yeah, the gender neutral names. You get a. You probably get Brendan sometimes.

[Eddie]

No, I don't. Most people just respect me and call me. Call me Brandon. Except for assholes online, they call me Brendan.

[Titus]

Wait, it's Brandon.

[Eddie]

It's Brandon with an A?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Do you hate Brendan?

[Eddie]

I don't. I. Nothing. Brendan. Because that's not my name.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, but like, you hate it.

[Eddie]

I've never encountered it in real life. It's only online.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, but you definitely hate.

[Brandon Walker]

You've never met a Brendan?

[Eddie]

No, I, I. No, I've never been confused for a Brendan.

[Big Cat]

But you hate the name Brandon.

[Eddie]

It's a worse version of Brandon.

[Big Cat]

Right? You hate it.

[Eddie]

The knockoff version of Brandon.

[Brandon Walker]

It really is.

[Eddie]

Yeah. So I do kind of think it's stupid.

[Connor Griffin]

Where does Brandon come from?

[Eddie]

It's. It's Scottish. I don't know.

[Brandon Walker]

What's it mean?

[Eddie]

I don't know. I don't know. I believe it was a character in a book my mom was reading as she was knocked up with me. Oh, yeah? Yeah.

[Big Cat]

That was it.

[Eddie]

I think so. My dad wanted to name me tj.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah?

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

But Thomas. What?

[Eddie]

Jackson.

[Big Cat]

Thomas Jackson Walker?

[Eddie]

Yeah, I think so.

[Brandon Walker]

Stonewall.

[Eddie]

I don't think. I doubt he knew who that was.

[Brandon Walker]

Okay.

[Eddie]

Probably just somebody that played for the. For Mississippi State in 73.

[Connor Griffin]

Are there old Brandons?

[Eddie]

I. No, I. I don't know how many.

[Big Cat]

The fact they're young Brendan's translates to.

[Kyle]

Hill covered with broom. Amazing.

[Eddie]

It's a masculine name.

[Big Cat]

Do you ever see those. Those two gay guys that do the gay name or straight name?

[Brandon Walker]

Yes.

[Big Cat]

I think they did Mark the other day.

[Connor Griffin]

Oh, really?

[Big Cat]

We should see it.

[Kate]

Let me find Mark with a C is gay. In my mind, it's like sexy kind.

[Connor Griffin]

Of K. Could be gay.

[Kate]

Mark with a K is just a Mark.

[Brandon Walker]

It's Mark.

[Eddie]

It's just.

[Brandon Walker]

It's Mark.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Mark is straight.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Almost too straight.

[Eddie]

Almost.

[Connor Griffin]

It's unfortunately, yeah, extremely straight.

[Brandon Walker]

Kyle. Why are you Kyle?

[Kyle]

My dad wanted to name me Blaze.

[Brandon Walker]

Ah.

[Eddie]

So said.

[Kyle]

No, it's Kyle. It's either Blaze or Kyle.

[Brandon Walker]

Blaze Bauer.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

I'm. I'm not gonna lie. Blae Bauer.

[Kate]

Yeah. That's kind of sick.

[Eddie]

Kind of amazing. Especially for a wrestler.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Like, maybe after you get that done.

[Kyle]

With wrestling, you got like a lot on your plate.

[Kate]

It's embarrassing to lose if you're Blaze Bauer.

[Kyle]

Right.

[Kate]

That's tough.

[Kyle]

Yeah. You have an expectation.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Number six in your district and your Blaze Bowers.

[Kyle]

No, you gotta be losing in the conce semis if your name is Blaze.

[Kate]

Oh, but like, Kenneth Bauer. Six would be great. I'd be like, oh, wow.

[Kyle]

Kenneth. Kenneth.

[Kate]

Like, that name I have lower expectations for.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, right.

[Eddie]

Good job, Kelly.

[Kate]

Yes. Good for Kenneth.

[Big Cat]

It's Miss. Miss Thing. The pod on Instagram. Yeah. Did they do Mark? Oh, straight name Mark. Hello. Mark is gay. He's always surprisingly gay.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Mark is someone who. You first meet him, you think straight, you're like, okay, so straight.

[Kyle]

And then as Mark hobbies and interests.

[Big Cat]

You have to very subtly not react to the shock when you find out that they're gay. Like, because you're obviously like, oh, you were gay. Telling you about the warehouse party that they were at and you're like, you're gay.

[Marshall]

Listen, I completely agree.

[Big Cat]

Mark was kind of like a good, good student.

[Marshall]

You know, bookish a little bit, but like, always kind of like played sports.

[Big Cat]

He wrote. Oh, no. Really inherited that gay accent that people.

[Marshall]

Love to talk about.

[Big Cat]

In our comments.

[Marshall]

Mark was marked safe from gay voice.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. The other thing that Mark inherited. Oh, my God.

[Kyle]

Is Mark Love.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. To tell you about who they slept with with the previous weekend. That is always.

[Eddie]

Yep.

[Big Cat]

You're always talking about your wife.

[Connor Griffin]

Oh, my God. Wow.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it's scary.

[Connor Griffin]

That's a lot. That's a lot to think about.

[Eddie]

So have they done Kyle and Nick and.

[Connor Griffin]

I mean, they're not wrong.

[Kyle]

Look for any late night set.

[Big Cat]

Look to see if they have any of our names.

[Kyle]

Union.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah. Union at Columbus. Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

How'd you know the Columbus Gay Bar?

[Kyle]

Because I got stranded there once in a blackout with my phone dead.

[Connor Griffin]

It'll happen.

[Kyle]

Woke up with some videos.

[Big Cat]

Videos? Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Videos of what?

[Kyle]

I got nursed back to health by some. Some big fat gay dude.

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Big Cat]

What do you think is the most common name for a gay man? And there's one answer. I know what it is. There's so many. I'll give you a.

[Connor Griffin]

It's pause.

[Marshall]

Oh, oh, wait.

[Kyle]

Oh, no, that's just a hint. It's not cop.

[Big Cat]

Wait, Go. I'll give you a hint. It's Kyle.

[Jay]

Close.

[Big Cat]

Oh, Brian, I.

[Kyle]

Okay, this is a hint.

[Big Cat]

Brent or Trent of your probably other than me. Gay best friend is named this.

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Big Cat]

And his husband and his. They're both named Matt.

[Eddie]

They know.

[Big Cat]

Oh, Gay Matt. If you know a mat in your life, they are gay. And if they're. I think they did Dan. And I think they came to the conclusion that Daniel.

[Kyle]

Daniel's gay.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

They're like, anyway, Anytime you do the full name.

[Connor Griffin]

Such a funny premise, you know, because anybody that gets like defensive, you're actually hurting yourself harder.

[Kyle]

I said, wait, is Daniel Tiger a character?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, he is. Oh, oh, oh, Steven, your evolution.

[Kyle]

Straight name.

[Big Cat]

Steven. Steven's gay. Yeah. I'm sensing femme.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Totally.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Yes. Is someone who's.

[Eddie]

I haven't seen them call a name straight.

[Big Cat]

Well, the gay voice.

[Eddie]

Totally.

[Marshall]

Well, when you are born, when your.

[Big Cat]

Name starts with an S. Yeah, I know there are some Mask Stevens, you know, but I'm not.

[Marshall]

Yeah, unfortunately, I think like, you still still have a twinge of gay accent.

[Big Cat]

Which of course.

[Connor Griffin]

The comments are hilarious. Do Zach. Next.

[Kyle]

Interesting.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm curious how that.

[Jay]

I'm not.

[Brandon Walker]

Never mind.

[Big Cat]

I sent this to. They did Ryan. Oh. A little bit ago and I sent it to Rosillo and. And he was like, we should start doing this. But just straight name or super straight name. And just talking about how sick like a dude is.

[Kyle]

Dusty.

[Big Cat]

This dude benches so much.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Stephen is kind of a gay name. What? It is Steven.

[Brandon Walker]

I guess when you say it like.

[Big Cat]

Actually Brandon might be the only one that's. You can't like Brandon.

[Eddie]

Nope.

[Big Cat]

But Brendan. Brendan.

[Eddie]

Brendan's the gay version of Brandon.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Whoa.

[Eddie]

Yeah. You guys don't have gay versions of your names. You're just.

[Big Cat]

Your name is just Daniel Nicholas. Yeah. Any longer.

[Eddie]

I disagree with them. I think there's more Gay Dan's and gay Daniels. No, I think I, I, I think. No, that's what I feel.

[Kyle]

You feel.

[Eddie]

I feel it.

[Big Cat]

There's. I mean, like.

[Eddie]

No, I feel gay dance.

[Big Cat]

No one goes.

[Kyle]

Dan's pretty rugged.

[Big Cat]

No one goes with Daniel.

[Kate]

Well, Dan's are power bottoms and Daniels are femtops.

[Eddie]

Don't know what that means.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I don't either.

[Eddie]

Speaking of, speaking of Zach, what happened this morning?

[Big Cat]

He might have slept in again. We gotta.

[Eddie]

You might have come down on. On your, on your baby boy.

[Big Cat]

We might have to take away his video games. So it's gonna be a problem. I don't want to take away his video games, but I think we're gonna have to take away his video games games.

[Kyle]

Pull the plug.

[Big Cat]

Well, he was. I. The guys were telling me. So on Sunday nights we finish the podcast. In football season, we're at like 12:30, 1:00 clock and then like, pft. Hank and I go home and Max and Memes and, And Shane and Pug and everyone, you know, edits and they don't finish till like 4 in the morning. Max was telling me that Zach just Hangs out with him and then goes home and plays video games. So he's playing video games at like three or four in the morning every Sunday.

[Eddie]

Throws his whole week off.

[Kyle]

He stay all night.

[Big Cat]

I think he has some friends that work odd hours and so he has some friends that he can game with at any hour of the day.

[Kyle]

But he's not hearing his alarm.

[Big Cat]

I don't know what. Today was a little bit of a. We didn't, we didn't have a full set schedule, but it was also like, we kind of know our schedule. But yeah, he. We might have to take away his video games. I don't want to do that. I don't want to take away his tough games. I love the guy.

[Connor Griffin]

Maybe just take away the fun ones. Yeah, you can play video games, but they suck.

[Big Cat]

We haven't recorded the portion of the show yet where we discuss it with him, so we'll have to. We'll see what the. What the end result is.

[Kate]

I feel bad for him too, because it's just the worst feeling in the world. I used to be a big time accidental late and it's like, that's the worst punishment of all.

[Big Cat]

And today he walked in and we were all sitting waiting for him and we cheered for him when he came in and he said that he had.

[Marshall]

He.

[Big Cat]

I was like, when did you wake up? He said 12 minutes ago. So he was still basically asleep. He just rushed in. That's okay. He'll figure it out. He is so. He's so nice and so. So he apologizes so much that it's hard to stay mad because, like, we've had other guys that would fight, would be like, no, it's your fault that I slept in.

[Brandon Walker]

No, no, I did.

[Big Cat]

And that makes it a little bit more difficult. But he comes in and he almost cries. So we. It's like, how can you be mad about that?

[Marshall]

You can't.

[Big Cat]

Who's on the treadmill right now?

[Eddie]

Bft. Oh.

[Big Cat]

I feel like we have to wean ourself off of Mincy.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

And I can't go cold turkey. I had. Someone in the office was listening to Mincy's conversation on the phone yesterday and I just kind of want to share it.

[Brandon Walker]

He's been more talkative than ever.

[Eddie]

What about the video we received?

[Brandon Walker]

I don't believe it.

[Eddie]

Okay, I don't either.

[Big Cat]

What was that?

[Eddie]

Do you want him down here?

[Big Cat]

No, I think we just say it and then you guys can go.

[Eddie]

Oh, he's active.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Eddie]

Mobile.

[Big Cat]

Some of his quotes. Maybe we should.

[Eddie]

And what's this from?

[Big Cat]

This is from him. Just I think. Well, he talks on the phone very loud.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

So he's just sitting and talking on the phone super loud in the middle of the office.

[Titus]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

So he kind of wants everyone to hear it. He said only three people could get that kiffin phone call. He hadn't done an interview in months, so now he's taking credit for it. Oh, he's mad about that. People are mad about out.

[Eddie]

Yeah. The thing that was business fault.

[Big Cat]

Are they still doing Shorty Fest this year? Oh, no. I don't know what that is.

[Titus]

It sounds funny, though.

[Eddie]

Some sort of music festival in New Orleans.

[Big Cat]

Dave is really happy with me in the hard work.

[Eddie]

That's not. No. Not accurate at all.

[Kyle]

Can't be. Right.

[Brandon Walker]

He said that to me in person yesterday.

[Big Cat]

Marty Grock. Yeah. See all these things he said, so I. I have no problem saying him. He's set him to every.

[Brandon Walker]

Everyone.

[Big Cat]

That's Shorty Fest. Oh.

[Kate]

Trombone Shorty rules.

[Big Cat]

Not as cool as we thought.

[Eddie]

That would be pretty cool.

[Kate]

Kind of cool.

[Big Cat]

No, but I thought Shorty Fest was like. Like a bunch of. Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Shy.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Marty Gro content would be great. Something different.

[Eddie]

What?

[Titus]

The past three years in a row.

[Brandon Walker]

He said that to about 20 people yesterday.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Most secure I've been in 24 years. Okay.

[Eddie]

Secure. Wait, wait.

[Big Cat]

Job security. I think.

[Eddie]

Think since he turned 18, maybe.

[Kate]

Is he considering him and Tate one in the same? Maybe like a package deal now?

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

And then this last two are very funny. He said loved having Danny Boy Kane around. He's a Miami fan, not an employee of Barstool, just a friend of Dave's. And then he said he is one of the weirdest characters I've ever been around. That's Mincy talking about Danny Boy.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

I think he said Danny Boy Kane was in his own world.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Yeah. Which is perfect. Yeah, it's perfect.

[Brandon Walker]

It's. It's addicting content. It really, really is.

[Big Cat]

It really, really is. And Danny Boy will be there. We've confirmed everything. He's. He's already texting Tate about the tickets.

[Brandon Walker]

Get him downloaded phone.

[Big Cat]

So next Monday. It is so stupid that they wait this long to do the.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

National championship.

[Eddie]

Yeah. The fact that feels like it's lost all momentum.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. The fact that we have the.

[Connor Griffin]

The.

[Big Cat]

The conference championships in the NFL are set.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

You got to finish it before NFL playoffs.

[Brandon Walker]

You do.

[Eddie]

I think you got to figure out a way to get back to where New Year's Day is your finale.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

And if they could do that. They'd have it perfected.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Nick, sorry about the Steelers. It.

[Brandon Walker]

It was.

[Big Cat]

No one saw that coming.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah. Since the beginning of the year, we knew this was what going to happen. It's just, it's always the.

[Big Cat]

It's actually incredible.

[Brandon Walker]

It's always the same.

[Big Cat]

It's the same every time.

[Brandon Walker]

Every single time. Exactly the same. It doesn't matter who's on the team.

[Big Cat]

It's just the same.

[Kyle]

But it was the opposite.

[Brandon Walker]

Tell me for when you were growing.

[Kyle]

Up, it was like this. Yeah, of course the Steelers are going to win.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

So that's something.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah. That's interesting. And I said it on web this morning. I'm kind of appreciative because time feels like it's moving so fast, but the Steelers make it feel like it hasn't moved at all.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

When I'm watching that, it's like, oh, life is long. I'm young.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

This is the same.

[Big Cat]

I'm doing the same thing I was doing seven years ago. So there's no difference.

[Brandon Walker]

There is nothing that's changed.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

So that's kind of nice. It's like rewatching a movie that, like that, you know, the ending to an anxiety thing.

[Kate]

It's comfort show.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Was there any point that you guys thought that you were going to win the game?

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Halftime, I think.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you had them in the Steelers.

[Brandon Walker]

Right where we wanted them.

[Big Cat]

Seven, six.

[Marshall]

Beautiful.

[Big Cat]

Perfect. Just them up. Make them make mistakes.

[Brandon Walker]

If they, if they keep. Tomlin, Jerry and I are talking about boycotting and then filming and doing something else with our time on Sundays.

[Big Cat]

What?

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

What do you guys think?

[Brandon Walker]

We're, we're, we're pitching it. It's back and forth right now. And I don't want to say anything to.

[Kyle]

Compared to a dessert.

[Big Cat]

Tomlin to a dessert. Tomlin to a dessert is I would say like a little bit of a stale store bought chocolate chip cookie. You're still gonna eat it.

[Kyle]

Very good. But we'll never win.

[Big Cat]

You're still gonna eat it, but you're not gonna be like, wow, that was an incredible chocolate chip cookie.

[Brandon Walker]

And if you don't want it, somebody else will take it.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you leave it, it will be taken.

[Kyle]

That's good. The grocery store or Chips Ahoy.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, a little bit like. Or like I'm thinking of even the store bought ones. Like with some. Sometimes you stay at a hotel and they're out. They've been out for like all day.

[Kyle]

A little hard.

[Big Cat]

You checking it 11pm and you're like, I haven't eaten all day. I guess I'll have this one.

[Brandon Walker]

I think it has to be chips ahoy because it's. You know exactly what you're getting.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

Cookie.

[Big Cat]

It's as standard as possible. It's not something you ever crave, but it's not something you would pass up either.

[Brandon Walker]

It might be a fortune cookie because it's not going to knock your socks off. It's not the best thing. It's tradition, and it has a quirky quote on the other.

[Kyle]

That's good.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. The coaches as desserts.

[Brandon Walker]

I love that.

[Kyle]

Coaches as desserts. Okay, who is. Who is saltwater taffy?

[Eddie]

Oh.

[Big Cat]

I don't know how I feel about saltwater T. That was too.

[Marshall]

That was too hard of a.

[Brandon Walker]

Let's think about it. It's something you only buy for other people on when you're coming back for vacation. Somebody you thought forgot about.

[Kate]

Old people love it. What's those. Who's a coach that. The old heads really? Like.

[Big Cat]

I'm thinking, like, what, Like a standard Sunday ice cream Sunday would be like Andy Reid. Yeah, it's good.

[Kyle]

Banana split.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

It's just gonna be good. You're gonna like it. It's gonna be good.

[Brandon Walker]

It's not gonna reinvent the wheel. It's not. Yeah, it's good. Good.

[Big Cat]

It's Good.

[Kyle]

Who is McDaniel or what is McDaniel?

[Big Cat]

Mike McDaniel.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

He's a weed gummy.

[Kyle]

He's a weed.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kyle]

Can be a vibe.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah. Kind of. You up a little. It's like, all right, maybe not a weed gummy. Maybe like, you know how they do wheat? Like Skittles with weed in them.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Like three.

[Big Cat]

So it's a good dessert, but it's also like, I probably ate too many of these. Yeah.

[Eddie]

You're talking about regular size Skittles or Skittles.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

What size?

[Big Cat]

Oh.

[Eddie]

Ooh.

[Big Cat]

I've never seen the Skittles littles with.

[Kyle]

They get smaller. They're already pretty small.

[Eddie]

Che.

[Brandon Walker]

What do you give Todd bowls?

[Eddie]

O.

[Big Cat]

Todd bowls? Might be a bowl of, like, sugar cereal.

[Eddie]

It needed to be a bowl of something.

[Big Cat]

It had to be a bowl that's not really a dessert. But you're like, I guess this sati. Satisfies it.

[Jay]

It's like frozen yogurt, like a flavor.

[Big Cat]

Oh, no way. Good.

[Jay]

No. What's the.

[Big Cat]

The. Oh, halo top.

[Jay]

Yes, that's it.

[Brandon Walker]

It halo top's trash, but it looks good on paper.

[Big Cat]

You eat halo top?

[Brandon Walker]

Me yeah.

[Eddie]

What the.

[Marshall]

I don't.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, you do.

[Brandon Walker]

I don't.

[Big Cat]

You definitely.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm a sherbet man. A rap.

[Eddie]

I'm sorry. Halo top's fine. What's wrong with Halo top?

[Big Cat]

It's nothing. It's gross. I eat ice cream.

[Eddie]

I think it's fine.

[Kate]

No, it's bland.

[Big Cat]

It's bad.

[Eddie]

Okay. Sorry.

[Jay]

I like Halo top, too.

[Big Cat]

Say you like Halo Top.

[Connor Griffin]

After that, that big, bad, big cat. What were your emotions seeing Aaron Rodgers, perhaps his last pass of his career as a pick six?

[Big Cat]

I. So, Danny, I don't know if you. I. Because I think it's because the Bears are good. I didn't really feel anything.

[Titus]

Yeah, we don't care about her anymore.

[Connor Griffin]

It wasn't funny. It wasn't.

[Big Cat]

If the Bears were just finishing a four win season, I think I would have been celebrating it. Yeah, it was a Super bowl, but it was just like, oh, okay. I also think he's going to be back.

[Connor Griffin]

Wow.

[Big Cat]

I don't know why.

[Connor Griffin]

I just think he's in Pittsburgh or.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Well, I think whatever it is is going to draw the decision for a while.

[Brandon Walker]

Jerry thinks him and Tomlin back one more year.

[Big Cat]

Oh, man. That will be different.

[Marshall]

They'll probably lose.

[Big Cat]

That will. That. That will be crazy if they do that. But it also very Steelers.

[Brandon Walker]

It'll be very Steelers and like, it's not a great coaching cycle this year, I don't think.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

There's no IT guy.

[Big Cat]

So you're stuck with Tomlin. Yeah.

[Marshall]

Yes.

[Brandon Walker]

Dude.

[Big Cat]

You got the chocolate chips Ahoy and that you.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

And it satisfies you sometimes. This week 18 win was awesome.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah. But then he did like the. The blow the kiss to the camera.

[Big Cat]

I know. After another person up.

[Eddie]

Yes.

[Big Cat]

He took credit for another guy's up a miskick and he's like, I did it.

[Connor Griffin]

I did that again.

[Big Cat]

Check it out, Steve. We do DraftKings. Oh, I forgot to do Stella Blue. Go to Stella Blue coffee dot com. Save a dog's life. We get the new ready to drink cans. It's very delicious. Stella Blue coffee dot com. We got everything in the store and we're helping save dogs. All right, Stephen, do DraftKings.

[Jay]

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[Big Cat]

Opt in King of the court.

[Marshall]

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[Eddie]

Don't. I don't like that.

[Titus]

Don't do that.

[Jay]

Steve.

[Titus]

This will be the last week of the wheel, right?

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Titus]

I'm gonna miss it.

[Jay]

Two winners.

[Big Cat]

Two winners this week.

[Jay]

I don't think anyone won their parlay.

[Big Cat]

No, because it was that disaster game. Patriots, Chargers game that everything was under. All right, Steven, what do you got for us? Anything?

[Jay]

I had a. A fairly crude one from.

[Big Cat]

Oh, wait. Before you start, did you guys see Stephen Chase's Ladder Challenge?

[Jay]

Oh, not a ladder challenge, but Steven.

[Big Cat]

Shay's doing a challenge where he's doing a bet every day for seven days, and he starts with $50 in a minus 500 line. The next day, he gets $60, 400. He started last night. He lost.

[Eddie]

Minus 500.

[Big Cat]

Minus 500.

[Eddie]

Got hurt.

[Big Cat]

Oh, you're not even on that step. You're not even on that step. Dudes, get your ass back down there.

[Jay]

That has been corrected. That was just a clerical error.

[Big Cat]

Get your ass back down there.

[Jay]

We don't celebrate injuries. We don't mock injuries. Yeah, I'm gonna play this week. Tough.

[Big Cat]

That was so funny.

[Brandon Walker]

So, Back to square one.

[Jay]

San Antonio spurs plus 20 and a half tonight at. Okay, so see Oh, I want this.

[Big Cat]

To lose so bad. Oh, plus what?

[Jay]

20 minus 495.

[Eddie]

Oh they kind. They've kind of own the. Yeah.

[Jay]

30 against him this year.

[Connor Griffin]

Thunder are do.

[Eddie]

I could see a blow Thunder dude.

[Big Cat]

Oh man.

[Eddie]

Spank him.

[Big Cat]

The first step appointment television tonight. All right. What were you gonna say?

[Jay]

We had a conversation. I'm a gambling kid that had on Sunday night. It had me laughing so hard I almost threw up. What I wanted to discuss. So Wonton Don told us that once he was asleep on a bus and pissed his pants. He was so drunk he was asleep and peed his pants. Dana said that he had a friend who was asleep and had a wet dream on a plane. I was wondering who is the less desirable person to be sitting next to.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm gonna take the come on the plane.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Titus]

We're sitting next to Brandon right now. He has come in his pants.

[Eddie]

I think there's a world you don't notice the guy that has the wet dream, right?

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Titus]

You don't smell it.

[Big Cat]

You don't notice.

[Kyle]

I think the boner pisses worse.

[Eddie]

The piss is way more. I feel like the piss is gonna announce itself a lot loud. More loud pisses.

[Brandon Walker]

Piss come feels like biohazard to me.

[Titus]

The piss will escape the pants. It'll get on the floor. It will affect you the come.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah. I feel like I wouldn't even notice the come.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Like he's making. I might be asleep too.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

So I wake up and he's. And I look over. He's covered in piss. I see that.

[Titus]

Having a wet dream for during a nap.

[Eddie]

That's a lot.

[Big Cat]

That's fucking horniest.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Jay]

That'S. I. That sounds so bad. You have to notice it if a guy's rocked up and maybe making like potential noises.

[Brandon Walker]

Oh, I don't want that it be.

[Kyle]

It'd be worse to see with your eyes.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Was he making noises? He's grunting.

[Jay]

That. That's what I'm envisioning. He didn't know because his friend was the one that was having it was asleep.

[Eddie]

Oh, so he was really getting it in perhaps when he was asleep.

[Connor Griffin]

Sleep.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Also do get airplane boners. That does happen.

[Eddie]

I Y' all keep saying that and I. I can't fathom.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm too nervous to.

[Connor Griffin]

If the wet dream guy's like thrusting or like rubbing his dick on something.

[Kate]

I might have to move.

[Big Cat]

That would have bad.

[Connor Griffin]

But I pictured on a plane. I pictured him just sitting there and then just busting.

[Brandon Walker]

Not even asleep. Spontaneous combust yeah, Yeah.

[Eddie]

I think both are outrageous.

[Connor Griffin]

But poop?

[Big Cat]

Oh, that's way worse.

[Kyle]

That would piss me off.

[Big Cat]

You. You so mad.

[Brandon Walker]

Dude on the flight himself next to me.

[Kate]

That lady who pooped down the aisle. Remember? It was like viral the other day.

[Brandon Walker]

They had to land the plane.

[Kate]

Yeah. She, like, ran down the aisle. Poop coming out of her pants.

[Big Cat]

Oh, man.

[Connor Griffin]

Like Steve eating seafood.

[Brandon Walker]

Oh, yeah.

[Kate]

Solid. That's best case scenario. I feel like his basketball shorts.

[Jay]

Do you guys think there are.

[Big Cat]

It was all lobster.

[Jay]

Yeah, it was expired lobster.

[Connor Griffin]

Tired lobster slid right out.

[Jay]

Do you think there are more leather.

[Brandon Walker]

Belts or leather couches? That's one of the least believable stories ever.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Like I said, full log. Full log.

[Jay]

Didn't someone say that they get that too? Where if you get chili that you have to go number two, like, pretty quickly.

[Brandon Walker]

I'd feel a big log.

[Kyle]

I hate to circle unbeknownst.

[Brandon Walker]

Can't believe it.

[Big Cat]

Peanuts.

[Brandon Walker]

Can't believe it just slid out.

[Eddie]

What is this size leather belts.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

What's the Steven stories?

[Connor Griffin]

Steve ate bad lobster.

[Brandon Walker]

Expired.

[Connor Griffin]

Expired lobster.

[Big Cat]

His father loved buying expired seafood.

[Connor Griffin]

He was wearing gym shorts, and a solid turd fell out of his butthole through his gym shorts.

[Kyle]

And he just looked down it on the grass.

[Kate]

Didn't feel it.

[Big Cat]

You didn't feel it? There's no way.

[Eddie]

There's just no way.

[Connor Griffin]

And he looked down and he said, is that my.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Whose is that?

[Kate]

And I believe you said it. Not your words on my. It was like the size of a dick.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

It was big dick.

[Big Cat]

And he just had no idea it fell out of his ass.

[Eddie]

So. Ch. Out of your ass?

[Kyle]

Your underwear, out of your shorts.

[Jay]

I was running to my car. That makes a difference? It's a lot.

[Big Cat]

It just fell.

[Connor Griffin]

Just slid out.

[Jay]

Why would I lie about pooping my pants?

[Big Cat]

You didn't feel any stomach pain? It's just like, boom.

[Jay]

No, my stomach felt numb.

[Brandon Walker]

I wouldn't.

[Big Cat]

I would.

[Brandon Walker]

A guy like me would feel a giant dick coming out of his ass.

[Eddie]

Yeah. It passes through your butthole. How do you not feel that?

[Kate]

There's women who don't. Who are like, I didn't know I was pregnant till the baby was coming out. And I'm like, how So I guess if that.

[Jay]

If that's a thing I knew for your life.

[Kyle]

Are you ready to swear on this under oath lie detector. Put your hand to God. Describe what happened logistically with this. With this turd.

[Jay]

I was playing basketball. I was playing great. It was 2000.

[Brandon Walker]

Don't believe it.

[Eddie]

Why do you have to have.

[Jay]

I lived at home with my parents. It was.

[Big Cat]

How old were you?

[Jay]

I was 22. Yeah. It was a Sunday. The afternoon games were just.

[Big Cat]

Or.

[Jay]

No, the. The one o' clock games had ended and there was like poor afternoon games. So some friends wanted to get together, play basketball. I didn't see them in a long time, so I was like, okay, this feels irrelevant.

[Big Cat]

You were eating the expired lobster during the games.

[Jay]

I had it for lunch.

[Big Cat]

So you were eating your. So let's back.

[Jay]

I think it was like a sell by date.

[Big Cat]

Let's back up. You're sitting at home, your parents house.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Watching an NFL Sunday.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Just mowing down some expired lobster.

[Jay]

I mean, I had the expired lots before the game started, but. Yes.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Okay.

[Jay]

So I was playing and then it was a chillier day, so I was going to. I felt like I had to poop my pants. Like I felt like I had to poop. So I was like, okay, I'm out at. I think the school's name is Holy Trinity. Holy Trinity. And they have a very nice outdoor basketball court. It looks like the Fresh Prince court from that intro where it's all colored, so. But there's no bathrooms. It's outside of a schoolyard. So I was like, oh, fuck, I gotta go. There's no bathroom. I went. There's a. There's a large step.

[Eddie]

Thank God.

[Big Cat]

Breaking news.

[Jay]

Oh, shit.

[Big Cat]

Huh?

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Connor Griffin]

Wow.

[Kyle]

He's going to.

[Connor Griffin]

Wow. Thank God.

[Kyle]

Wow.

[Eddie]

Wow.

[Brandon Walker]

Thank you, Mike.

[Connor Griffin]

Wow.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

And this what we should talk about from now on and not revisit anything that was already being talked about.

[Connor Griffin]

Oh, that's huge. You guys asked me that's.

[Eddie]

Again, Mike Tomlin.

[Brandon Walker]

Just think that don't add up to that story.

[Eddie]

Fine.

[Jay]

Yeah. I didn't put my pants.

[Eddie]

Ha.

[Jay]

Sucker. Why?

[Eddie]

Wait a second. You told me to stop him. We had him stopped and then you re engaged.

[Brandon Walker]

You're right. My bad.

[Eddie]

Mike Tomlin. Huh?

[Brandon Walker]

Is that. Is the Steelers the best available job now? The best opening?

[Big Cat]

No.

[Eddie]

No quarterback.

[Big Cat]

God, no.

[Brandon Walker]

Ten years guaranteed job security.

[Big Cat]

Probably more.

[Kyle]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

In the NFL.

[Eddie]

Yeah. But when? I don't. When did Tomlinson.

[Brandon Walker]

He's there for 19 years.

[Eddie]

So they had Roethlisberger when he took it.

[Brandon Walker]

Yes.

[Eddie]

They don't have that hope now.

[Brandon Walker]

But still you get so much leeway in a league where if you don't figure out in three years, you're gone.

[Eddie]

I feel like you got the leeway because Chuck Noel had Bradshaw. Cower came in. Cower kind of went from o' Donnell to Some. Nothing. But then Tomlin had Roethlisberger. I think. I think their. Their longevity is artificially inflated by the fact that they all came in with the quarterback.

[Brandon Walker]

So you think now the Steelers will be a franchise like the others?

[Marshall]

Where.

[Eddie]

I think they could. I think without the stability at quarterback. I think that propped up the stability of the coaches to an artificial degree.

[Big Cat]

I'd rather have the Ravens job. I maybe would rather have the Giants job.

[Brandon Walker]

You're kidding.

[Big Cat]

Don't have a young quarterback back.

[Eddie]

Well, well, congrats.

[Big Cat]

Now you can keep watching the Steelers.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, that's good.

[Big Cat]

That's huge.

[Brandon Walker]

That's good.

[Kate]

Who would you. In a dream world, who's coming in?

[Eddie]

Harbaugh, right?

[Brandon Walker]

No.

[Big Cat]

Oh, no. Same thing. Well, I mean, that would just be. You'd just be doing the same thing. He had the same thing with the Ravens going.

[Kate]

Belich.

[Connor Griffin]

What if they.

[Eddie]

He wanted to bow with Flecker ago.

[Marshall]

Right.

[Big Cat]

But that was 12 years ago. Four, 13 years ago. Like, he kind of within the similar situation of like, always being good enough to be in the playoffs, but never actually.

[Brandon Walker]

There are three open jobs in the AFC North. It would be funny if they all just traded.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

There's three open jobs. And the Bagels guys still.

[Big Cat]

Zach Taylor, he's still like, what the. Dude, what did I do?

[Brandon Walker]

I don't know. Somebody young.

[Big Cat]

I just like saying I quote cheat. Every time Shefter announces a firing, I say, why? Just so everyone can get mad underneath the comments. Huh.

[Brandon Walker]

So you felt like you had to, but then the feeling went away. But you didn't know whose was on the ground.

[Big Cat]

Felt like you had to.

[Jay]

Sorry.

[Brandon Walker]

That doesn't matter.

[Connor Griffin]

It doesn't matter.

[Brandon Walker]

It doesn't matter.

[Big Cat]

You guys don't want spilling up there.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah, no, it happened. It definitely happened.

[Kate]

But it was clean. There was no need to wipe.

[Connor Griffin]

There have been more Popes than Steelers head coaches since 19.

[Brandon Walker]

A lot more.

[Kate]

Six popes.

[Connor Griffin]

Wow.

[Big Cat]

They're old.

[Kate]

I didn't realize we were blowing through them.

[Connor Griffin]

How long is like the typical Pope tenure?

[Eddie]

Well, JP2 went.

[Kate]

Went a while, but I guess not.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah, I don't think that's that surprising. No, I like, every Pope that becomes Pope is old as well.

[Brandon Walker]

Like 80.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

It would make sense that we've had.

[Eddie]

Some quick Popes lately, though.

[Big Cat]

No, it's crazier to say that the Steelers are now looking for a new head coach for the third time since 1969.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah. That's crazy.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, that's a crazy, crazy stat. Yeah, I kind of. We already Taped some of pmt. So now we're gonna redo it. But I was basically saying in it I was like he. Tomlin should want to walk away.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

There's nothing looks like he did. Yeah, I know. That's what I'm saying. Like he should. He should want to leave.

[Brandon Walker]

He's going to do tv, right?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. For a year and then he'll get a new job somewhere.

[Kyle]

And now do you guys celebrate him for what he's done with you guys for sure.

[Brandon Walker]

I think so, yeah.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. The fact that he walked away makes it a little bit like if you dragged it out another year, I think it would have gotten ugly.

[Brandon Walker]

When do you think that was decided?

[Big Cat]

Probably right after the game. Probably right around the. The fourth quarter.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

You think he coaches again like a head coach in the NFL?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Some team will. He's a leader of men. He is.

[Connor Griffin]

These guys are just different man.

[Big Cat]

He is. I will say the. The greatest thing that Tomlin has on his resume is that he was able to keep a locker room of Levon Bell, Ben Rosberger and Antonio Brown somewhat together.

[Brandon Walker]

Artavis Bryant was on that.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Like he did. He did kind of keep those guys. They all went well. Ben had his own issues but like you know, Antonio Brown basically lost his mind after he left.

[Brandon Walker]

As soon as they left. Yeah.

[Big Cat]

So there's something there. Players coach. So the came out.

[Kyle]

That's all. How did it come out? Describe the ship portion of the story.

[Jay]

Consistency. Six and a half out ten of.

[Connor Griffin]

Of ten. What.

[Eddie]

What.

[Connor Griffin]

How are you. What's a ten out of ten? Why would you have a half?

[Brandon Walker]

What's a ten? Is that hard?

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

What's hard?

[Jay]

Yeah. Density, hardness.

[Kyle]

Okay.

[Jay]

Why are you guys asking questions? You don't want the answer.

[Kyle]

I just want you to say exactly what happened cuz I don't.

[Big Cat]

I did and I kept getting cut off portion.

[Jay]

You guys are asking me these questions.

[Kyle]

Say the came out of your ass through your underwear, through your shorts and landed on the ground without you knowing. Just say the that.

[Jay]

Have I not. Yes, that's. That's exactly what.

[Connor Griffin]

That's what happened.

[Kyle]

So I just want it on record.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Big Cat]

Like as you were walking I was.

[Jay]

Running to my car.

[Eddie]

So in this.

[Jay]

It was like the step before I stepped shot out.

[Eddie]

In this madeup scenario, you. It just. It just popped out.

[Jay]

I hope you guys don't think I my.

[Kate]

Is there a chance that didn't your.

[Connor Griffin]

Pants you through the ground you the ground?

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

It didn't touch your pants or your.

[Big Cat]

Leg or Was it a dog turd.

[Kate]

And the feeling went away Lie I had.

[Jay]

Have you guys ever had like a.

[Connor Griffin]

This is the biggest lie it's ever been. Not happen.

[Eddie]

I don't know what numb tummy feels like.

[Connor Griffin]

That's the biggest lie I've ever.

[Big Cat]

Numb tummy.

[Eddie]

But again, that's your tummy. What about your. It has to go through. It has to go through your. You didn't feel that?

[Jay]

No, my stomach was numb.

[Titus]

His stomach doesn't matter though your would have to be numb in order for you not to feel it.

[Jay]

Fine. I don't care if you believe me. If I On the.

[Connor Griffin]

I don't. I don't believe.

[Jay]

Good cuz I don't care.

[Connor Griffin]

I don't believe you.

[Brandon Walker]

We.

[Kyle]

We don't believe gay.

[Connor Griffin]

We don't believe you at all, brother. Respectfully, we don't believe you.

[Titus]

It's like what an 80 year old does. They can't even tell they themselves. I don't think you want that narrative, Steve.

[Jay]

I don't. I haven't talked about the story in years. I think.

[Big Cat]

Can we get. Can we call a friend? They see the.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Have we ever tried.

[Kate]

Can we pull it up on Google Maps and see the exact.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I would like to see like I did.

[Jay]

I did go back after and tell them that I did my pants.

[Big Cat]

I don't know if they saw it. You didn't.

[Connor Griffin]

Your pants, however you want to phrase it.

[Jay]

Why is this coming up today?

[Big Cat]

Because I. I don't know.

[Brandon Walker]

Can't talk about mints.

[Kyle]

How loose were your boxer shorts?

[Big Cat]

How big were the. The basketball shorts?

[Jay]

It's 2008. So I mean there's were they.

[Brandon Walker]

And I had to so bad but now I don't have to. But that can't be my turn on the ground.

[Big Cat]

Did you. Did you. Did you get mad at your dad for the expired lobster?

[Jay]

Oh, yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

How does expired lobster produce a solid log? That's. That's diarrhea.

[Brandon Walker]

Che. Will you eat expired lobster and we can test this to see if.

[Big Cat]

And have you run around on the court.

[Jay]

I think it has more to do with the weather situation.

[Big Cat]

Okay, well, how.

[Eddie]

How.

[Jay]

Yes. You guys don't want to talk about this?

[Eddie]

No, no, no, no, no. I'm. I'm.

[Big Cat]

I'm having fun.

[Eddie]

How would weather have had an effect there?

[Big Cat]

I'm enjoying this.

[Connor Griffin]

He said so deep.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Jay]

I've told you several times that if I get chilly and I'm not dressed appropriately, then I have to poop.

[Big Cat]

If you get chilly. Cold. Not eating.

[Jay]

Correct.

[Big Cat]

And you don't address a pro. So we got to test this. We got to get you chilly.

[Eddie]

See, if you poop 40 degrees outside and you wear a T shirt and shorts, you're going to have to poop.

[Big Cat]

It's numb tummy.

[Connor Griffin]

So if you went to the bears knowing it, did it fall out of.

[Kyle]

Your ass like a skydiver or did it hit your underwear at all or your shorts?

[Big Cat]

Did it.

[Jay]

It slide?

[Kyle]

It just fell right. Did it like, right through your holes? Three holes.

[Connor Griffin]

Like. Like the. The guy jumped off the Titanic and hit the propeller.

[Kyle]

It had to have hit your garments.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Was there anything? Was there. Is there any sign of it when you went to check your underwear so your under us.

[Jay]

So this happened. My next step is the car in which I sit down and then I drive for a mile and a half.

[Big Cat]

Wait, so you didn't know you. You did. You look back and saw it?

[Jay]

I have one foot on the car, and I see it. At which point? What am I gonna do then?

[Big Cat]

But you knew it was yours?

[Jay]

Yes.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Titus]

I mean, what route could the pooh have taken in order to not hit anything?

[Big Cat]

Could it have been just like a dog?

[Jay]

Oh, no, brother. That was my brother.

[Connor Griffin]

Brother.

[Big Cat]

Brother also.

[Titus]

So the expired lobster is kind of irrelevant because the cold is really what made you yourself.

[Jay]

Yeah, it's a combination. You guys, for bringing this up. You guys are such. You guys are all asking me to corroborate the story I told, like, three years ago.

[Eddie]

Being.

[Jay]

When I respond, someone lying to us.

[Kyle]

The event you're describing is, like, once in an eon. Can never happen to another human.

[Big Cat]

We're talking about seeing Haley's comet.

[Connor Griffin]

If. If KB Told me he was abducted by aliens, I'd have fewer questions.

[Jay]

That's fine. I UFO a couple years ago too. Right.

[Brandon Walker]

Right.

[Connor Griffin]

Any other coaches fired?

[Brandon Walker]

Jay, I'm sorry for getting you riled up.

[Big Cat]

Can we recreate it, though, Jay?

[Jay]

It's tough, but, I mean, if we go to a grocery store and I'm in a T shirt, then it'll probably happen.

[Big Cat]

Numb tummy. I want to get chase tummy so numb. Just to find out what it produces.

[Brandon Walker]

We should all do it.

[Big Cat]

The numb tummy challenge.

[Kyle]

It's not even the numbness. The path that it had.

[Connor Griffin]

It's the path of the turd. I keep going back to.

[Big Cat]

Left or right.

[Jay]

I don't remember. I think right. I don't know. I don't know how. How it exactly came. I didn't feel it. I just saw it on the ground.

[Kate]

Can I ask how it was laying in the ground. Sorry. Was it like, how do you think.

[Jay]

A turd is laying on the dumb.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Hey, quit.

[Big Cat]

Quit prying.

[Eddie]

Stupid ass.

[Big Cat]

Were your shorts a little askew? Like, you know how, like, if you pull your shirt.

[Eddie]

That's the best.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Damn.

[Marshall]

Hate.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Like, were your shirts a little screwed up?

[Jay]

What is this question you're asking?

[Connor Griffin]

They got to be, like, the quadruple X.

[Kyle]

The shorts, biggest shorts, biggest underwear.

[Titus]

Yeah, actually, the underwear.

[Eddie]

This is how.

[Connor Griffin]

The underwear.

[Marshall]

This is.

[Brandon Walker]

This is like the JFK assassination.

[Kyle]

We're hyping you up. You deserve, like, a segment on 60 Minutes.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I never heard a guy who.

[Kyle]

Got impaled by a rod through his chest and it missed his organs by, like, a nanometer.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. You're the man who's shot in the head, and it's like, got straight through the brain, missed everything. Yeah. I don't know.

[Jay]

Know. How is this coming up today? This is a story.

[Titus]

I had never heard it. And they ref.

[Big Cat]

I don't know. Did we reference it or did I think it was your fault because you started talking about coming on a plane and.

[Connor Griffin]

Oh, we're talking about pooping.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Naturally, we segued into this.

[Jay]

Okay. All right.

[Big Cat]

But now I want to bring it up, like, once a month.

[Connor Griffin]

I do, too. Just.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Titus]

I think we could focus on a different part each time. We seem to skip over the part where he doesn't feel like at all coming.

[Jay]

I'm going to be very clear. I don't mind talking about this at all. But if you guys are going to ask. Act bored. Like, you're not asking me these questions.

[Big Cat]

Completely. That is fair, because you're not bored. I'm not bored right now.

[Jay]

All right, well, I see Brandon cringing and slouching back. I see Titus calling me a liar to my face.

[Big Cat]

It's frustration.

[Connor Griffin]

Can I stop you there? I think the whole room is calling you a liar, for what it's worth. Jay.

[Eddie]

Jay. I also think they get the lie.

[Big Cat]

I don't give a. I was trying to show.

[Eddie]

Yo.

[Big Cat]

How many. How many guys were playing hoops?

[Eddie]

Say, man. May I say one thing? It's just an observation.

[Big Cat]

Oh, this could be explosion.

[Titus]

Don't.

[Jay]

No. Brandon's been fine.

[Eddie]

The angrier you get, the more of a lie it seems.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, but why would he lie about this?

[Jay]

Yes. This doesn't make me look good in any way.

[Eddie]

Way.

[Big Cat]

It does make you look like maybe prophet or some type of. Some type of angel.

[Eddie]

Yeah, and while we're here, you didn't run a 4. 4.

[Big Cat]

Oh, no.

[Brandon Walker]

All right, that's.

[Jay]

I don't care. If the guy lied to me, then that's on him. I believe what I was told.

[Marshall]

That's.

[Brandon Walker]

That is too far.

[Big Cat]

Too far. How many people were playing basketball?

[Jay]

I think at that point, the numbers had dwindled a little bit. We did have. Have fours, and I feel like maybe it was twos or threes at that point.

[Big Cat]

Do you have anyone you could call?

[Jay]

I'm not really tight with that group anymore.

[Marshall]

Yeah, we can't hang out.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

You know what? Now that I'm thinking about it, that's last time we hung.

[Connor Griffin]

I.

[Brandon Walker]

Kate, any questions? I guess that was the last time I hung out with those.

[Titus]

I haven't spoken to them since that day.

[Eddie]

Oh, man. It makes sense.

[Connor Griffin]

There you go, Danny. That's the story.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Now you know.

[Titus]

Allegedly.

[Brandon Walker]

And also him not talking to them anymore makes me believe it fully.

[Titus]

All the witnesses are dead.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Titus]

Sorry for asking, Steve. Just curious about my friend.

[Big Cat]

Way to go, Danny.

[Jay]

Again, I don't mind talking about it. It's more that you guys are being dickheads.

[Kyle]

Do you understand?

[Connor Griffin]

We were.

[Brandon Walker]

We were all right.

[Eddie]

On the other side. On the other sheet.

[Brandon Walker]

I'm thankful for you and your stories.

[Eddie]

Yeah, I'll do Flavortown. The playoffs are here, and it's time to raise your game. What's that coming down the tunnel? It's Guy Fieri's Flavortown sauces. Just in time to help your tailgate or pregame hit different. Just like this weekend when the Bears host the Rams. They'll be tailgating out there in an amazing matchup. We want to talk about some sauces that'll pair perfectly with your next meal. Guy Fieri's Flavortown sauces. You can slather on bold flavors and elevate your game. You can't bring that weak stuff. It's the playoffs. That's why you bring the big guns with Guy Fieri's Flavortown sauces. This time of year demands bold flavors. Flavortown just hits different sauces and seasonings for a flavor blitz delivered directly to your dough. There's chicken wings right off the grill slathered in OG Buffalo sauce, or a nice rack of ribs in smoking hickory barbecue sauce. When game day is on the line, you gotta have the flavor that brings it. Grab Flavortown sauces and seasonings wherever you get your groceries. You must take these sauces to the house. You can grab them wherever you get your groceries. Remember, Flavortown sauces just hit different. Guy Fieri's Flavortown Connor's here for a second.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Connor Griffin]

Connor.

[Big Cat]

Connor.

[Jay]

Hey.

[Big Cat]

I have two questions. One is for another ad, but the first is you're. You. You're mad at Lynn Jones.

[Marshall]

I never said I was mad at Lynn Jones.

[Big Cat]

I just said sounds like you're mad.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

You can't be doing that in a press conference.

[Eddie]

But you can though.

[Brandon Walker]

You can't.

[Big Cat]

She did.

[Eddie]

You can.

[Big Cat]

You can and she did.

[Eddie]

It's fine.

[Marshall]

Yeah. There she's. It's not like she's going to be like, you know, taken out of there. Never allowed back in that facility. But that just not. You can't. You can't do that.

[Connor Griffin]

And by that you mean. Mean be butt ugly.

[Big Cat]

I only.

[Connor Griffin]

You can't be that ugly.

[Big Cat]

She had 34 double Ds.

[Eddie]

If Aaron. Andrew asked the same question.

[Marshall]

If Aaron Andrews had said that, I absolutely would have had the same criticism.

[Big Cat]

No way.

[Marshall]

Yes, I would have.

[Brandon Walker]

You're not.

[Marshall]

Even though I love Aaron.

[Brandon Walker]

Are you attractive?

[Marshall]

Love Aaron Andrews. Oh, Shay, how about that fur coat the other day?

[Kate]

Great coat.

[Jay]

Incredible.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

What was with the fur coat? Oh, did you saw the fur coat? I saw it, but I didn't think.

[Eddie]

Oh, Connor has a lot of opinions on the coat.

[Marshall]

Only because you guys asked me for my opinion. Opinion.

[Brandon Walker]

I wasn't gonna come out.

[Big Cat]

Sounds like you got a lot of opinions on the fur coat.

[Marshall]

I just said it was. It was a good coat. It was 40 mile an hour winds. You got to stay warm.

[Big Cat]

It's just a fur coat, but everybody was doing it.

[Eddie]

A lot of coat.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it's a nice fur coat. Yeah. Was that skunk?

[Marshall]

That's fake.

[Eddie]

I think it's fox.

[Marshall]

Yeah, fake fox.

[Big Cat]

How do you know that?

[Eddie]

We looked it up.

[Brandon Walker]

Fake fox. What?

[Big Cat]

She's on fox.

[Eddie]

It's fake. Yeah, it's fake fur, but it's. It's fox.

[Connor Griffin]

Real fox.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

Nothing against Lynn Jones, nothing against Aaron Andrews, nothing against the coat.

[Big Cat]

But just if. If you're gonna ask those questions, be a little hot.

[Connor Griffin]

You gotta be hot.

[Brandon Walker]

Would you have her back to a press conference after a stunt like that?

[Marshall]

Lynn Jones we're talking about? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you have to. She's been around for 30 years. But you know, I'm fine with what she said. It's just that, you know, you could say that in private. You could say that. Not during a press conference. That's all.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Kyle]

I'm interested in being swayed. Why can't you?

[Marshall]

Professionalism, it's the. The sense. The number one rule is you don't cheer in the press box, you don't show that you're a fan of the team. You don't do anything that's like that because it shows favoritism and it shows that you're not.

[Eddie]

Counterpoint.

[Marshall]

The impartial journalist. You should be.

[Connor Griffin]

Okay, you think the woman that's been covering the Jacksonville Jaguars for 30 years is impartial, Marshall. And has no feelings one way or another about the Jaguars?

[Marshall]

Yeah, no, I'm saying if not for.

[Connor Griffin]

This stuff, this was her taking the mask off, and it's like, oh, my God, you're a Jaguars fan.

[Big Cat]

And the whole time. And she was ugly.

[Connor Griffin]

And she was. And she was ugly.

[Marshall]

Yeah. And like, when I was. I don't know why we keep going back to the ugly thing. Yeah, she's a lovely lady, but, yeah, there's. There's just a certain level of, like.

[Big Cat]

Would you, though, on both.

[Marshall]

Both levels, Would I ask that question? And then would I?

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah, would you?

[Big Cat]

Would you? Would you? Would you? And would you?

[Titus]

Would you, in that order.

[Marshall]

Out of respect? No.

[Big Cat]

Which one?

[Marshall]

What are we talking. What are we talking about? Lynn Jones. Out of respect. No, to Lynn Jones. And out of respect, would you.

[Kyle]

What?

[Marshall]

What do we.

[Eddie]

No, but if you were.

[Big Cat]

But if she was, like, tight with you, would you.

[Marshall]

Out of respect now. Okay, because we're talking about professionalism here. That would be unprofessional. Yes.

[Brandon Walker]

Is telling somebody to keep their head up bias?

[Marshall]

It's just. It's a form of consoling. It's a form of, oh, my God. Like, people can view it as sucking up. Like, people can. It's not. I'm not saying they have to be holding this guy's feet to the fire unless, like, you know, oh, fuck Liam Cohen, and why'd you do this during the game? And blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But you do get a certain amount of questions throughout the course of a press conference. As a. As a room of reporters, you have to divvy up these questions.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah. You gotta think of no one.

[Marshall]

That was one of them.

[Connor Griffin]

And, hey, no one gotta ask, how do you feel after that?

[Marshall]

And if I'm a type person, if there is a reporter who asks a question like that, they're a terrible reporter. Don't ask a question like that. I think there are plenty of reporters who are soft by asking bad questions, and I critique those people, too. This, I don't want to say was soft, but it was like. It was just a different form of. Yeah, you're not asking the right questions.

[Kyle]

But is that, like, in the handbook. You can't do that. You should.

[Big Cat]

In the handbook.

[Marshall]

That's absolutely in the handbook.

[Connor Griffin]

Who wrote the handbook? Where's the handbook come from?

[Marshall]

Everything that you're taught in journalism courses, everything you're taught to get certified. Everything. Like you're. You're not supposed to be showing favoritism to certain coaches or players. You're not supposed to be. Be, you know, their buddy. You're supposed to be somebody who's asking insightful questions. And again, if there's somebody who says, what about that third down? That's not an insightful question. They're also not doing their job. So it goes both ways.

[Connor Griffin]

So we can you and I be friends?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. What do you mean?

[Connor Griffin]

I don't know.

[Marshall]

We're not journalists.

[Connor Griffin]

I mean kind of.

[Marshall]

I. I do not think.

[Connor Griffin]

We're not actual journalists.

[Eddie]

No.

[Connor Griffin]

Okay.

[Marshall]

This. We. We chose. We choose to do this. We choose to talk about.

[Connor Griffin]

All right.

[Marshall]

Farting and all right.

[Big Cat]

So why we really have you in here though?

[Marshall]

Sex and all that type of stuff.

[Big Cat]

What's up? Bumble is a new sponsor. How's everyone feeling stepping in New Year? I'll be honest, I dropped my resolutions pretty fast. I actually still going to the gym, Kyle. But maybe that's the point. You don't need a whole new you to find someone great. You just need to show up as your real self through Bumble. Profiles on Bumble are designed to show your personality, interests and lifestyle. And a rich which visual way you can quickly get a genuine sense of someone's vibe and have natural conversations through prompts. Prompts take the pressure off small talk and make it easier for others to start real conversations. They help your profile feel in intentional and relatable. So you invite matches who get your vibe from the start. And chats feel more natural and easy. Showcase more of you and find people that get your vibe on Bumble. Download the app today. So you're here because Bumble's a new sponsor? Bun Bumble is sponsoring the Connor Griffin dating show. What?

[Kyle]

It's happening not know this.

[Big Cat]

We are going to find you a match.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

And we don't have any plans yet, but we wanted to at least introduce it because I think we should probably start with getting some applications. How are we going to do this, tj? Do we know?

[Marshall]

We got to put an application together. So when we did the Malisek one, we had him like tell us privately like his non negotiables whether it's like, like going to sleep at this hour or smoking or whatever. That way we can, like, put these questions into a sheet, but if we.

[Big Cat]

Say it out loud, then people are.

[Marshall]

Just going to lie and get around that. So, like, we got to talk to Connor privately and we'll put out a publicly.

[Connor Griffin]

I mean, one is like, ugly. Like ugly.

[Big Cat]

If you're ugly head.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

So, yeah.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

One concern. This is going to be all the same girls that did the malice equal one.

[Marshall]

You think?

[Big Cat]

No, I do.

[Kyle]

Do we have the reach to other girls?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, we definitely do. And Connor's a way more appealing candidate, Right?

[Brandon Walker]

That's true.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Kate]

To keep it exciting, do you guys want me to sprinkle in one predator?

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, grab one.

[Kate]

You want me to find one chick?

[Big Cat]

What are you looking for, Connor?

[Marshall]

I don't know. What should I say? A nice leg lady. A nice lady.

[Eddie]

That's all. Okay.

[Big Cat]

Has to be involved.

[Marshall]

I'm not gonna say. Head would be nice. Head would be, like, an absolute necessity. Yes. I'm kidding, kidding, kidding.

[Big Cat]

But not.

[Brandon Walker]

Wait, so, like, if there was somebody that didn't give head at all ever. You're fine.

[Marshall]

Yeah, I'm fine.

[Big Cat]

No, you're not fine. You need head. Yeah.

[Marshall]

We. We probably should pull up the Travis Kelsey.

[Connor Griffin]

This is the Travis Kelsey clip.

[Big Cat]

All over Travis Kelsey clips.

[Connor Griffin]

Travis, Kelsey, what are the odds we.

[Brandon Walker]

See you kiss on camera during Zero.

[Kate]

Oh.

[Eddie]

Oh, come on.

[Big Cat]

I would like it to be higher than 0.

[Eddie]

10%.

[Big Cat]

Zero is like zero feels when you say zero odds to something. It just. It's like there are zero odds that someone could play a game of basketball and then have that's the closest fall out of your shorts. That's zero odds.

[Connor Griffin]

That's what we're talking about, Connor.

[Eddie]

If it's zero, you're forcing zero. You're making sure that you're not doing it. But 10 means if the mood hits you just right and you just fall in love immediately, you got to do it.

[Marshall]

I'm. I'm a private type of guy.

[Big Cat]

Oh, good thing we're doing this show.

[Marshall]

Oh. When it comes to, you know, that type of stuff. Yeah. I. I don't know if I want to put that.

[Eddie]

You send a text to the mostly sports group chat every time you get.

[Marshall]

Late, just not blowing them up.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Bone city is what you.

[Brandon Walker]

I believe you say population me.

[Marshall]

I send you guys a text when I'm like, I do my laundry like that. It's. It's the most basic boring stuff. Like, I'm not sending you guys any of these.

[Jay]

Boring guy.

[Kyle]

He does that.

[Big Cat]

All right, let's do rapid fire preferences.

[Marshall]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

Height.

[Marshall]

I vary on height.

[Brandon Walker]

Shorter or taller than you?

[Marshall]

Well, I mean, shorter, preferably.

[Brandon Walker]

Would you like to be a short girl or like a. I. I've gone both.

[Big Cat]

Is there any limit to height?

[Marshall]

No, not really.

[Eddie]

Perfect. Six, eight, perfect height. Go 68.

[Marshall]

Actually, six, eight would be interesting. Just out of curiosity.

[Eddie]

Five, seven.

[Kate]

Climber. Like a tree?

[Marshall]

Yeah, yeah, like five, seven, five, eight.

[Big Cat]

Hair color?

[Eddie]

Hair color.

[Marshall]

I am not exclusive with this, but I typically lean more towards Burnett. Well, again, that's not a. Not a deal.

[Eddie]

You're not going to offend anybody. Just.

[Marshall]

Well, I just. I don't want to get into deal breakers and all that type of stuff.

[Eddie]

Curly hair, straight hair.

[Marshall]

It doesn't matter.

[Big Cat]

Pro life or pro choice? That does matter. That does matter.

[Marshall]

We could cover that on a second day.

[Brandon Walker]

That's big.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Marshall]

That's typically. Oh, I go back and forth on that as well.

[Big Cat]

What do you mean?

[Brandon Walker]

You talk fake or natty?

[Marshall]

Tits, preferably natty.

[Big Cat]

You want the big natties? You want Matt? Natties or little natties? You like fat natty?

[Marshall]

It's about the personality. It's about the personality.

[Big Cat]

But if you had to choose, are you a tits guy or an ass guy?

[Connor Griffin]

What's the thing you notice first?

[Marshall]

It's been a constant evolution, and I think as I've gotten older, I. I've. Yeah. Swayed here and there. I probably. I'd have to go tits, most likely.

[Big Cat]

Okay. All right.

[Marshall]

They're more fun to play with.

[Kate]

Good.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Are you. Oh, my God. Are you interested in guys? No.

[Marshall]

No.

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

Because some of us.

[Eddie]

Here Friday, you'll. You'll. Yeah, yeah.

[Marshall]

No, if I see.

[Big Cat]

Don't turn it off.

[Marshall]

Don't turn off the possibility of having.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, let's.

[Marshall]

If you want to.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

If we want to throw a guy in there just to. If he's breathtaking. If he's breathtaking and maybe he makes it all the way through. Through. And because we are going to do this probably, I'm assuming we're going to start blind, right? With all these.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Marshall]

Would you. Yeah, maybe there's, like a blind resume in there and it happens to be a dude.

[Connor Griffin]

Okay, but what about blind. What about blind women?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. What if we did a blind resume, but it was all blind women?

[Marshall]

That'd be fine as well.

[Connor Griffin]

You could. You'd love a blind woman.

[Marshall]

Yeah, I'm not turned off to anything.

[Eddie]

Wheelchair.

[Titus]

What?

[Brandon Walker]

Would you stop dying your eyebrows if you were dating a blind woman?

[Connor Griffin]

Woman.

[Big Cat]

Good question.

[Marshall]

No, I can never go back to the blonde eyebrows.

[Eddie]

You were. You Were telling us which races you don't want.

[Marshall]

No, I.

[Brandon Walker]

That was a long list.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I'm.

[Marshall]

I'm open.

[Big Cat]

Would have been easier to just say whites only. No, no, I'm.

[Marshall]

I'm open to anything.

[Big Cat]

Wheelchair.

[Marshall]

Yeah, wheelchair, Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Marshall]

We talked about it on there.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

Very beautiful women.

[Big Cat]

What about Cowboys fan?

[Marshall]

That be fine, too.

[Jay]

Wow.

[Big Cat]

I think I've also.

[Marshall]

I've said on this show before, too, I think it's kind of fun. It's a little bit of a. A fun thing to have, like, a rivalry within the. The household.

[Big Cat]

That does sound fun. What about a.

[Eddie]

What if she.

[Big Cat]

White supremacist.

[Eddie]

A joa. New tattoo.

[Kyle]

Ooh.

[Marshall]

Tattoos is something I struggle with.

[Titus]

Oh.

[Marshall]

Not trying to figure out exactly my. My thoughts on them, because some can be tasteful, some cannot.

[Brandon Walker]

What if it's a chick that used to date Titus?

[Marshall]

Yeah, that automatic. She's ruined automatic now.

[Brandon Walker]

Why is that?

[Kate]

Well, that would be a wheelchair.

[Connor Griffin]

What if it's a chick that's married right now, right this second. You.

[Marshall]

You keep this.

[Connor Griffin]

It's a hypothetical, Connor.

[Marshall]

I love your wife. Not in that way.

[Big Cat]

Age.

[Connor Griffin]

Age.

[Big Cat]

Like, we're talking like, 16 to.

[Eddie]

Over the 1834 demographic.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

What's the. What's the. How old are you?

[Marshall]

I am 26.

[Big Cat]

Would you, like, date someone who's 30?

[Marshall]

Yeah, I would.

[Big Cat]

Would you date someone that's 21.

[Eddie]

For.

[Marshall]

Yeah, for the sake. Yeah. Just to see where it goes. Sure.

[Eddie]

19.

[Marshall]

No.

[Big Cat]

35. Yeah.

[Marshall]

Fuck it.

[Eddie]

14.

[Marshall]

But primarily, you know, not to pour my heart and soul out here. I would like to have kids someday. I would like to be.

[Big Cat]

What if they come pre. Kids? Like, they already have kids Loaded up. Yeah, Kids already.

[Eddie]

Oh, just say no. That's what you want us. You're not saying anything you want to say.

[Marshall]

I don't want to decrease the.

[Big Cat]

The applicant pool.

[Marshall]

I don't want to.

[Connor Griffin]

This is the exact opposite of Alice.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah. I don't every single way. But that being said, you might pick three women at the end.

[Marshall]

I. I will be in such a mental pretzel throughout this entire thing. What is this?

[Eddie]

What are you doing?

[Brandon Walker]

You can't just walk in here with.

[Kyle]

Gloves on to see if you guys would notice.

[Marshall]

Notice right away. You know, I don't want to turn anybody.

[Connor Griffin]

Can you break up with a woman? Well, is that something that you feel comfortable doing? Look, we're down to five contestants. You got to will it down to four. Look in a girl's eye and say, it's not you, babe.

[Marshall]

I mean, I'll have to do it. Sorry, I'll have to do it. But I. I will not be good at it whatsoever.

[Brandon Walker]

Do you think there's a chance you cry on camera?

[Marshall]

Yes, that. Absolutely. Yeah. Oh, not because necessarily I would feel this, like such strong attachment to somebody that I have to let go. Just because. Yeah, I would be in that spot where I. I would feel like such a terrible person and I would not want to do that to somebody if I would be like hurting their feelings or. I don't know if this is just a Chicago thing or if we had people fly in for the. The Malicex show or if.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, we sure did.

[Marshall]

In an af. They flew in just for this and then I sent it back. Oh, I'd feel like a terrible person. Person.

[Eddie]

What about what you're going to bring to the table as far as the performative aspect? Do you feel okay crooning to a woman?

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Marshall]

Pruning. Maybe some magic tricks.

[Eddie]

Okay.

[Kate]

Grind, line, grind.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Well, stand up there.

[Big Cat]

Like, I want to see how you ejaculate.

[Jay]

No.

[Big Cat]

Okay, that's. Well, you said you're open to everything, so I'm just. Yeah, sure. True. Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

How would you.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, well, they want to see your face because you.

[Marshall]

Oh, the face.

[Brandon Walker]

Just the face will put up a.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, not the actual penis. Dude, that's gross.

[Connor Griffin]

It's disgusting.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I know the face. They want to see your. Your old face.

[Brandon Walker]

What if she's like, you got to stop going to these young girl pop sensation concerts alone.

[Eddie]

A.

[Marshall]

They've never been alone.

[Big Cat]

They've never been alone. Never. You've never gone to a concert alone?

[Kyle]

Rodrigo.

[Marshall]

Rodrigo. I. I took Brandon's sister. Shout out, Kate.

[Connor Griffin]

Hug me, brother.

[Kate]

All right.

[Big Cat]

Oh, what about Brandon's sister?

[Marshall]

What?

[Eddie]

Now wait a minute.

[Big Cat]

In the pool.

[Eddie]

Hold on.

[Connor Griffin]

The candidates time.

[Big Cat]

You're open to everything.

[Marshall]

Open everything.

[Eddie]

That's not.

[Marshall]

Co workers friends. I'll.

[Big Cat]

Oh, that would be an interesting.

[Eddie]

If we did it just co workers.

[Big Cat]

Who's Connor gonna date in the office?

[Eddie]

I'd like to see how long the sign up she gets for that one.

[Marshall]

Yeah, yeah, whatever works. I don't want to just like cut off possibilities. I want this to be as big and as fun as it can be because obviously, yeah, we've done it now. This would be the third time. I want it to still be fresh and everything. So.

[Brandon Walker]

Whatever.

[Marshall]

Whatever works.

[Brandon Walker]

I think you're so different from malice. Like, you're going to go on these dates.

[Marshall]

You're going.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

No, it was so reluctant. If I wind up, you know this winds up with a person that wins the whole thing. Whatever. If we get that far in the process and the winner gets a date with me. Yeah. I'm going to go on the date. I love going on dates. Dates are fun.

[Kate]

Also can we help craft your perfect bumble profile?

[Marshall]

While I think that I would love to part of it.

[Big Cat]

This is getting difficult because you are so not picky.

[Eddie]

But.

[Marshall]

But I'm.

[Big Cat]

We're bringing in a 40 year old dude that doesn't like head.

[Eddie]

Yeah. But we're going to see.

[Big Cat]

And you're going to have to send.

[Eddie]

Him away during the dating process. We're going to see quirks we don't see now. And they're going to be fantastic.

[Marshall]

Correct. Yes.

[Connor Griffin]

Has to turn you off. You're hinting at tattoos. Is there. Is there something. No. No.

[Marshall]

I. I see because now I'm not.

[Connor Griffin]

Want to say tattoos but not.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

You're walking it back. There is a turnoff. What's the number one turn off?

[Brandon Walker]

Super jacked.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. The one. The number one turnoff of Connor Griffin Ugly.

[Marshall]

I don't know.

[Big Cat]

Bad press.

[Kate]

Could you do.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Like she little dog in a purse she carries everywhere.

[Connor Griffin]

Like would that bother you about bad hygiene?

[Marshall]

Like a foo foo dog bad hygiene is. Is up there.

[Kate]

What if she like doesn't always shave her legs and she only shaves her ankles sometimes. Sometimes when she's going to be wearing.

[Eddie]

Kate, are you entering this company?

[Kate]

You said you can't.

[Connor Griffin]

You can't think of a turn off.

[Titus]

Weird red flags.

[Eddie]

Let's get into.

[Marshall]

I mean, I mean the main thing. The main thing. There are no like turn offs that I have when it comes to first meeting somebody. If I'm. But if I'm actually trying to like get into a relationship with somebody and then I see red flags.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

What was the last. The last time you remember thinking this is a turn off off about a woman. What was it? What was the context?

[Marshall]

It was a. A bad relationship with their family.

[Connor Griffin]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

Oh it. So that was.

[Marshall]

But again that's like a deeper.

[Brandon Walker]

She had a bad relationship with you.

[Marshall]

Did she had a bad relationship with her family.

[Eddie]

Oh about facial piercings.

[Marshall]

Fine with that.

[Big Cat]

Have you broken up with a girl before?

[Marshall]

Kind of. Yes.

[Big Cat]

That sounds like you got broken up with.

[Marshall]

It was. It was a weird situation.

[Connor Griffin]

You got dumped and then you said yeah.

[Big Cat]

Then you're like we both decided to. Yeah. Both thought it was better if I got dumped.

[Brandon Walker]

If I got dumped.

[Marshall]

Yeah, mutually. But it kind of stemmed back to what I was saying earlier. Where Even if it's somebody, a rando who I just met, I still feel terrible breaking up. Not breaking up with them, but sending them home. So when I get into a relationship and then I realize this isn't going to work out and then I have to be the one breaking up, I get really heavy, hesitant.

[Brandon Walker]

But, Connor, if she flew out here from California and you don't like her, you can't keep her around.

[Marshall]

Exactly. Which.

[Kate]

Yeah, but they'll know that coming into.

[Big Cat]

It, this is possible.

[Kate]

What if she has a crummy.

[Brandon Walker]

Do we have a designated dumper? Do you want to have somebody come in and are you willing to dump?

[Big Cat]

Steve Jay will dump.

[Jay]

Yeah, I've done people.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, he's done well.

[Eddie]

No.

[Brandon Walker]

Would you be willing to dump the girls Connor's dating?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, she dumps.

[Marshall]

I'll take whatever help I could get from you guys. But I also know coming into this that that will be part of the show is me having to turn people away. So I'm ready for that as well. What? However we choose to do that, I'll be ready.

[Connor Griffin]

But what if only seven women apply?

[Marshall]

Then that would be a massive, massive shot to the ego.

[Connor Griffin]

Would you give those seven 100 or would. Would that just be in the back of your mind the whole time? You're like, I only got seven.

[Marshall]

Oh. You know, whoever, whoever applies this, we're gonna. To make sure that this is good and we're going to make sure Bumble is happy with it. And yeah, I'm excited to be a part of it.

[Big Cat]

So. Okay.

[Marshall]

Yeah, I don't want to turn anybody away. I don't want to. Long distance relations, severe deal breakers right now.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah. What if there are women in Dallas that are watching that are like, I would love to start something, Connor.

[Marshall]

Yeah, I think that'd be fine.

[Big Cat]

What about short distance relationships? Like, the woman's like, the only way I'll date you is I have to.

[Marshall]

Move in right now into my studio apartment.

[Eddie]

Yeah, well, she likes bistros.

[Titus]

Yeah.

[Marshall]

I still have the. The free kisses. Just ask sign at the Beastro. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Big Cat]

Trap any girls with that.

[Marshall]

Don't say trap. You guys say I'm a predator.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

No, no. Trap a few girls.

[Kate]

You know what? I think we'll get a lot of this time. Malisek. I say this with love, but, like, I'm not recommending my girlfriend girlfriends to try to date him. I think we're gonna get a lot of people watching who are like, I know a girl who I think would be great for him, I think we're gonna get a lot of, like, referrals.

[Marshall]

That's the goal. I agree.

[Kate]

This time.

[Marshall]

And I'll more of a wholesome guy.

[Kyle]

You are open to people from anywhere.

[Marshall]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kyle]

This guy that opens it up.

[Marshall]

I'm looking at you for the first time with these balloons.

[Big Cat]

Really?

[Marshall]

Yeah. You know, open anywhere. Open to anything. I'll. I'll get a haircut. I'll get dressed all spiffy.

[Eddie]

Whoa. And don't be afraid of picking two winners. Don't be afraid of coming out of this dating too.

[Titus]

Let's go.

[Marshall]

Lou will.

[Brandon Walker]

Lou will.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Don't be afraid. Don't limit your options here.

[Marshall]

Okay, well.

[Eddie]

Yeah, well, last question, because I was interested in your reaction to the tattoo thing. So where is the tattoo? A problem? So lower back tattoo, I assume is fine. Visible arm tattoo.

[Marshall]

You just don't want to see the back one.

[Kate]

He's.

[Titus]

Yeah, his lower back fine.

[Eddie]

That's so you. So all tattoos are a little iffy here.

[Connor Griffin]

Is it asleep? Is that.

[Marshall]

No, no. There have been, been. There have been some tattoos I've seen. I'm like, oh, that's the eagles logo.

[Eddie]

She's got a heart. She got a little heart on a heart tattoo.

[Marshall]

That's totally fine.

[Eddie]

Okay, but Cannon's face, then that would be an issue.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

What about like, on her cleavage? Yeah, she got tats on her cleavage. Is that hot? Is that disgusting?

[Kate]

What about like a Rihanna bird under that?

[Marshall]

Put a pin in that. Put a. Yeah, that would take feel problem.

[Connor Griffin]

He's giving us nothing.

[Big Cat]

He's giving us. Cuz.

[Marshall]

I don't want to. I don't want to turn anybody away.

[Eddie]

We'll start working on Connor. The very nature of this is turning people away. Yeah, you have to eventually turn people away.

[Marshall]

After we get the applicants.

[Eddie]

No, no, no, no. When we. Before we did the m thing, we had. We had like little notes of.

[Connor Griffin]

But if you don't people's time. Like, if you notice you don't like women with tattoos, and then.

[Big Cat]

He'S going to tell us.

[Marshall]

Steel breakers. I got it. People just lie. I got a text before. They're saying, don't reveal deal breaker.

[Eddie]

On the questionnaire, though. Are we going to put tattoos why or in.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I just have to do an arranged marriage.

[Marshall]

No, I don't. I don't dislike people with tattoos. I. I've dated.

[Eddie]

I'm just gonna get some tattoos. I'm getting a little pissed off now. You got to give us something.

[Marshall]

It'll be right if he Says his deal breaker is girls that go to bed after 10pm Then we ask what time to go to bed. Everybody's gonna say yes.

[Jay]

But we still know the goal is to not. Because the problem with the. The last one is we. We had too many applicants to sort through. We want to, based on this questionnaire, eliminate 90 of them.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Jay]

Because we're expecting a good deal.

[Eddie]

I don't know why him saying it now would. Would eliminate.

[Jay]

Because then people. They know the answers to the people.

[Kate]

Lie and say what he wants to hear.

[Marshall]

I. I apologize.

[Eddie]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Which is fine. I think that's fine.

[Eddie]

Yeah, that's.

[Connor Griffin]

That's. That's. I lied to my wife for the first, like six. Six months we dated also. That's part of dating. Is lying turn off for you?

[Jay]

Huh?

[Brandon Walker]

Is lying a turn off?

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Okay, so one of the deal breakers is lying.

[Kyle]

We'll ask if they lie.

[Connor Griffin]

That's. That's exactly what. That's what dating is. You go on a first date, you're like, I. Yeah, of course I have my. Together. I'm paid. Well, I, you know, never pooped out of my. I've never pooped out of my gym shorts. Would you like a second date with me? And that's. That's what you do. You lie.

[Eddie]

Whittle it down.

[Marshall]

All about honesty.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Marshall]

All about honesty. Yeah. Sorry, I can't give much.

[Big Cat]

No, you're good. You're good.

[Marshall]

I was told beforehand. Don't.

[Eddie]

It's all about honesty. You're not being honest.

[Marshall]

I haven't lied about anything. I just. I can't talk about it because we don't want to give anything away just yet. But hopefully people tune in. Hopefully they enjoy it and we'll make the most of it. It'll be very fun. Thank you guys for letting me do it. All right, you know, week after Valentine's Day.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Week after Valentine's Day.

[Marshall]

Perfect. Okay. Sounds good.

[Big Cat]

Love it.

[Eddie]

Hunter.

[Marshall]

Yeah?

[Brandon Walker]

What if you meet somebody before then?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. You got to make sure you.

[Brandon Walker]

We've already sold this.

[Connor Griffin]

I know.

[Marshall]

It's already been sold. It's already. I am.

[Big Cat]

And now that people can smell that you're not looking, you're going to get a lot worse.

[Marshall]

I am putting myself in a cage.

[Brandon Walker]

Are you going to vow off sex until after Valentine's? Until this dating show?

[Marshall]

I don't think it'll be that hard to vow off, but yeah.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I will not like Nikki Smoke, folks. Soft 60. That lasted.

[Marshall]

Yes. First.

[Connor Griffin]

You know, he already.

[Big Cat]

Wait, wait.

[Kyle]

He broke it via what?

[Big Cat]

Sex. He just did it so that he could tell everyone that he couldn't stop having sex.

[Marshall]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I said it would be no different if I was just like, you know what I'm not gonna do this year? I'm not gonna bench press £500. And like, four days later, I'm like, whoops, guys, I'm so strong, I bench pressed £500.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, maybe next year.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, man.

[Marshall]

You called him a. A phase guy.

[Big Cat]

He is. He's a little girl. He's a girl who one day wants to be a get a pony and the next day wants to be a ballerina. That's Nikki Smokes in a grown man's body.

[Brandon Walker]

That is true.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Daddy, I want this. I want no sex. Daddy, I want a sex. That's what he's doing.

[Kyle]

That would be a nightmare.

[Big Cat]

Daddy.

[Eddie]

All right.

[Big Cat]

Good job, Connor.

[Marshall]

Thanks, guys. Love you. Yeah, I'll be celibate.

[Brandon Walker]

This is gonna be so good.

[Big Cat]

It's gonna be so good, Brandon. We do the Pizza Hut read.

[Eddie]

Pizza Hut is the Pizza quarterbacks are asking for by name. So Pizza Hut is challenging quarterbacks to say pizza before Hut during a televised game. And if your quarterback says pizza before Hut, Pizza Hut will throw your city a pizza party. So tag your quarterback and use hashtag pizza before the Hut. But no need to wait for that to happen. Order the big New Yorker before the first Hut is yelled on game days. If it's Pizza Hut's biggest pizza for the biggest games, $10 for a limited time. Order your big New yorker@pizza hut.com or in the Pizza Hut app.

[Big Cat]

What did you send me, T.J. this video of Mincy?

[Marshall]

Yeah. Mincy thanked Big His. Oh, no, actually, no, he didn't. Somebody asked Ben on cameo to thank their friend Paul for letting them stay at their apartment.

[Big Cat]

Well, I got to see this.

[Eddie]

What's up, Paul? Spy with a message from your friend.

[Big Cat]

Ben who's rocking a great name. Well, I'm more than sure. Said he spent the weekend with you.

[Eddie]

And said he just wanted to say.

[Big Cat]

Thank you cuz he spent the night.

[Eddie]

Over your house and he had a great time and y' all turned it up and had a blast. And so I'm feeling some grateful vibes here from Paul.

[Big Cat]

And, hey, your name's Ben.

[Titus]

My name's Ben. It's the best name there is.

[Big Cat]

So there you go.

[Titus]

So thank you for being a good host to Paul.

[Eddie]

Hope y' all had a blast and.

[Kyle]

Cherish your friendship and let's get freaking hot in 2026.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. You got that backwards at the end.

[Brandon Walker]

He doesn't know Biz's name is Paul, right?

[Big Cat]

No way.

[Jay]

No way. Way.

[Marshall]

He also posted that shirt at like 2am last night.

[Big Cat]

Nice post.

[Kyle]

Posted what?

[Titus]

Get the night audience.

[Kyle]

Oh, the Dracula of philanthropy.

[Big Cat]

Perfect time.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Perfect time. All right, I think we got everything today.

[Eddie]

Y. Good show.

[Big Cat]

Great. I might have something for us to tomorrow.

[Eddie]

That'll be fun.

[Connor Griffin]

H.

[Brandon Walker]

Interesting.

[Titus]

Any hints?

[Big Cat]

Nope.

[Jay]

One hint.

[Connor Griffin]

What are the chances you bail on Friday high? Yeah, I. I can see the wheels turning over there. You're starting to realize this might not go the way you saw it going. Yeah.

[Kyle]

You looked at his whole Instagram, like, you know, both.

[Jay]

We're going to.

[Big Cat]

What you guys like. I know what I like, and it's that. Oh.

[Kyle]

Is he nervous?

[Big Cat]

No, he seems like he's confident in his. In what he's going to be bringing. So I think we're. Have a good shot. Have a good shot at this thing. This is gonna be awkward, man.

[Brandon Walker]

You gotta stop bringing Eddie. And he's doing you no favor.

[Big Cat]

Eddie's just. Eddie's not on team Big Cat so bad. It's crazy, man.

[Titus]

The Eddie's very anti hype, though, so it doesn't even matter how.

[Kyle]

He doesn't like any hype.

[Big Cat]

No, he's a. Yeah, it's the opposite of a hype beast.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Titus]

So I think that's. That's the only reason why.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. All right, let's spin the wheel. Tga.

[Eddie]

Tga.

[Big Cat]

Tga. That guy Andrew. I noticed Lucas wasn't on the stream last night.

[Brandon Walker]

No, he wasn't.

[Jay]

Why?

[Big Cat]

I invited him because he doesn't want to. Doesn't want to run with the big dogs.

[Brandon Walker]

Was a good time.

[Eddie]

Time.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Look like good time.

[Brandon Walker]

Hank turned off the tv.

[Big Cat]

I know. That was such a funny clip. It do it on purpose?

[Brandon Walker]

I think so.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, he probably did.

[Brandon Walker]

I think so.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Jerry was very upset.

[Brandon Walker]

2026, man.

[Big Cat]

What's happening?

[Connor Griffin]

Oh, something happened.

[Big Cat]

Pancake. What do you. What the are you doing.

[Brandon Walker]

Liam?

[Big Cat]

What the are you pressing, bro? This thing fell in the room. Don't touch the remote. What the are you doing?

[Eddie]

He put Disney.

[Big Cat]

No, he's trolling. He's trolling. All right, we're back. The are you doing, bro? It's good to see Jerry. Have a little fire. Yeah, little piss and vinegar. Okay, let's spin the wheel.

[Marshall]

Is Tate doing hole in one stream tonight?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I think so. With Trent and Lacy. Lacy?

[Connor Griffin]

They'll get it triple hole in one.

[Big Cat]

Wait. Oh, they won't.

[Connor Griffin]

It's three hole? I think so.

[Big Cat]

Sucks a golf.

[Connor Griffin]

I don't know where Lucas comes up with these ideas.

[Big Cat]

It's crazy.

[Connor Griffin]

Three holes in one.

[Kyle]

Three.

[Big Cat]

Wow. Yeah. Lucas or Tate's not good at golf. I think Trent and Lacy will get it because like on the simulator, it's just repetition. Getting it close.

[Connor Griffin]

Yeah.

[Brandon Walker]

Tate's girlfriend needs canonized.

[Big Cat]

Well, she is with every religion.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, you're right.

[Big Cat]

She immortalized in the New York Athletic Club.

[Brandon Walker]

Yeah, you're right.

[Big Cat]

Rest the time the Heisman as chef Donnie used his. Oh, oh. We got to ask him. Yeah, he better be. He better be, this guy. Oh.

[Eddie]

Damn.

[Big Cat]

All right, we'll see you for tomorrow. Time to talk shop is the act.

[Marshall]

Happy birthday to the late great Nick Mangold.

[Big Cat]

Love that guy.

[Marshall]

All right, love you guys. See you tomorrow.

[Brandon Walker]

Bye.