Session 98: Kaia Gerber

Summary

Podcast Summary

Podcast: Therapuss with Jake Shane

Episode: Session 98: Kaia Gerber
Release Date: October 2, 2025
Host: Jake Shane
Guest: Kaia Gerber

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Episode Overview

This episode of Therapuss features a lively, deeply personal, and funny conversation between Jake Shane and his close friend, model and actress Kaia Gerber. The duo reflect on their whirlwind friendship, share playful banter about their adventures, discuss their careers in acting and content creation, and offer candid insights into relationships, mental health, and navigating the public eye. The session moves seamlessly between lighthearted anecdotes and heartfelt advice, including the classic “Tell Me What’s Wrong” audience Q&A segment.

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Key Discussion Points

Friendship and Adventures

• Growing Closer: Jake and Kaia reminisce about becoming best friends over the past year, with shared trips to Austin and Portland, and building new memories.
• Portland Stories (04:38): Humorous retelling of Jake’s attempts at “nature” in Portland, swimming holes, cliff jumping mishaps, and Jake vlogging the experience.
  • Memorable Quote:
    • Kaia: “We sold you the dream and we under delivered and I’m sorry.” (05:29)
• Adventurous Personalities (21:11): Kaia is dubbed Jake’s “most adventurous friend.” They joke about Jake being lured out on weeknights and his growing boldness.

Acting Careers and Set Stories

• Jake as Actor:
  • Kaia witnessed Jake’s first movie role, relaying how the crew raved about him and how well he handled joining an established set (07:34–11:49).
  • Memorable Moment: Kaia recounts Jake’s confusion during improv scenes and his quick adaptation (11:03).
• Kaia in “The Shards”:
  • Discussion of her role in Ryan Murphy’s new show, including character research and the challenges of playing an ’80s LA kid (15:04–16:02).
  • Quote: Kaia: “Honestly, I love Ryan Murphy. Like, I didn’t realize Glee was camp when I watched it... he does that so well.” (15:38)

Book Club and Reading Habits

• Reading as a Muscle (13:42): Kaia shares her passion for reading, how she fits it into her day, and encourages Jake to build the habit.
  • Kaia’s Book Club: Library Science.
  • Quote:
    • Kaia: “I actually think reading is a muscle. And the more you do it, the better your attention span gets.” (13:42)

Pop Culture, TV, and Needle Drops

• Favorite Shows:
  • Jake loves Scandal (16:45–17:03), Kaia is cycling through The Office (18:29).
• Ryan Murphy Universe:
  • The pair geek out over Glee, Scream Queens, American Horror Story, and what “camp” means in TV (15:38–15:53; 30:32–31:55).
• Needle Drop Obsession (68:44):
  • Both express love for emotional TV soundtrack moments, from Girls to Grey’s Anatomy and The OC.

Relationships & Dating

• Dating in LA & NY (22:12; 48:43):
  • Both discuss the struggles and quirks of dating in LA vs. New York, the prevalence of monogamous vs. open relationships, and the value of being true to yourself.
  • Kaia’s Advice: Date your friends—“If you have the opportunity to date a friend, do it. It just is so much better.” (40:24)
• Embarrassment & Self-Worth:
  • Kaia and Jake talk openly about insecurities, the impact of online comments, people-pleasing, and learning not to let others define their self-worth (37:27–39:13).

Mental Health & OCD

• OCD Experiences:
  • Both share their personal experiences with OCD, from intrusive thoughts to compulsions, and the challenge of being misunderstood.
  • Quote:
    • Jake: “One of my ocds is ... thinking you’re a bad person all the time ... that’s what hurts the most.” (38:08)
• Therapy Recommendations (63:38):
  • Jake shares exposure therapy techniques, helped by Kaia’s insights on how diagnosis can lead to understanding and self-compassion.
• Drinking & Sobriety:
  • Both reflect on taking breaks from alcohol and how abstaining improves their mental health (56:47–57:15).

Audience Q&A – "Tell Me What’s Wrong" (59:34 onward)

• Boyfriend brings condoms to college: Kaia’s advice: “If there is any suspicion of cheating, leave... wanting to leave is enough.” (60:04–61:11)
• OCD Diagnosis at 37: Emphasize peace from understanding behaviors and recommend exposure therapy (63:08–64:19).
• Throuple & Paternity: Mixed feelings about finding out the father, jokingly prescribe watching “Mamma Mia!” and “think about the kid” (65:01–65:24).
• Partner’s Pet Snake is an Ick: Kaia finds it sweet; if you’re looking for icks, maybe you don’t like them as much as you think (66:43).
• Dealing with Embarrassment from Clumsiness:
  • Kaia’s tip: “If I trip, I just look at the nearest person and I say, are you okay? It just confuses them...” (74:10)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Friendship:

  • Kaia: “It’s so fun to watch people meet you for the first time. I have never heard someone say something bad about you.” (21:22)

• On Adulthood:

  • Jake: “You got me out of the house on a Wednesday.” (03:10)

• On Public Perception:

  • Kaia: “The amazing thing about you is the person that ends up loving you is going to be so obsessed... if they don’t, then like, don’t you dare shave your legs.” (22:28–24:39)

• On Relationships:

  • Kaia: “I used to completely just change my personality and my values for someone...but that’s not actually how you build respect.” (22:48)
  • Jake: “I think just to start...for my first boyfriend I’d like it to be monogamous.” (22:24)

• On Advice for Rejection in Acting:

  • Kaia: "Either a role was always yours or never yours." (29:12)

• On Mental Health:

  • Jake: “One of my OCDs is thinking you’re a bad person all the time.” (38:08)
  • Kaia: “I think everyone’s mad at me all the time. I have friends who text me ‘not mad at you’ because they know I probably think they are.” (39:24)

• On TV & Music:

  • Jake: “I'll tell you my favorite needle drops right now if you really want to know…” (68:49)
  • Kaia: “You love a needle drop. More than anything.” (68:45)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Portland “Nature” Stories: 04:38–07:19
• On-Set Acting & Jake’s Movie Debut: 07:33–11:49
• Book Club & Reading Habits: 13:42–14:03, 36:38
• Ryan Murphy & TV Recap: 15:38–17:12, 30:32–32:17
• Dating, Friendship, and Self-Worth: 21:11–24:39, 40:23–41:43
• Online Comments & Insecurities: 37:27–39:13
• Mental Health, OCD, Therapy: 38:08, 63:08–64:27
• Tell Me What’s Wrong Mailbag: 59:34–74:54
• Pop Culture & Needle Drops: 68:44–71:15
• Reflections & What Did We Learn: 75:00–77:28

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Episode Takeaways

• Celebrate True Friendship: The episode showcases the warmth and depth of platonic love, as Jake and Kaia support and tease each other with equal energy.
• Stay True to Yourself: Their stories about acting, making content, and dating emphasize the importance of authenticity—even when it’s hard.
• Mental Health Matters: Both host and guest speak frankly about OCD, anxiety, rejection, and therapy, normalizing these conversations.
• Date Your Friends: Kaia advocates for romantic relationships built on friendship and mutual respect.
• Don’t Let Fear (or the Internet) Define You: Whether facing social anxiety, online criticism, or the icks in dating, the duo encourage embracing your quirks and letting go of things that don’t serve you.

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a joyful, messy, and profound celebration of friendship, vulnerability, and humor—with genuine advice for listeners navigating their own drama. Jake Shane and Kaia Gerber prove that therapy—real or amateur—can be as goofy as it is healing.

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Listen for sharp-witted banter, heartfelt admissions, and plenty of pop culture recommendations. Perfect for fans of both hosts or anyone needing a reminder that being a little messy is perfectly normal—and sometimes exactly what you need.

Transcript

[A]

Hi. Tonight on Therapist, we have on one of my best friends, Kaia Gerber. She is one of the nicest, greatest, smartest, funniest people I've ever met. I just adore her. We've gotten so close over this past year and I am so grateful. And like, randomly we have so many. We've traveled a bunch together. Last weekend we were in Austin. We went to Portland together. So we just have, like a bunch of memories in such a short amount of time. And I'm just very grateful for her. I think she's so talented. She is one of the smartest people I've ever met. She runs a book club called Library Science. You have to check it out. It's incredible. It's inspired me to read. I'm almost there. I haven't started reading yet, but I'm almost there. She is the star of the new Givenchy campaign and she was recently cast in Ryan Murphy's the Shards. She was in Overcompensating season one. You may recognize her from Bottom Saturday night. She is everywhere. She is so incredible, so talented. You can also catch her in season two of Palm Royale on Apple tv coming out soon, which is also incredible. It's. She stars alongside Kristen Wiig, who, you know, I'm just. Is an idol of mine. She's one of the coolest people I've ever met and she's humble and smart and caring. And most of all, she's an incredible friend. I feel like this has just been like two minutes of me complimenting her, but she deserves it. To submit Tell Me what's wrongs, go to passthatpuss.com and click Tell Me what's Wrong. Leave a name and number if you're feeling fancy. Okay. Enjoy the episode. Love you. Pussies. Hi, pussies. Welcome back to Therapist. Tonight we have on actress supermodel.

[B]

Whoa, wait. Sorry. Keep going. What else? Go, go.

[A]

Leader of her own book club.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Kai Gerber.

[B]

Hi.

[A]

Did I miss anything?

[B]

No. That's too much, actually. You did too much.

[A]

And great friend.

[B]

Great friend.

[A]

Great friend. Which, by the way. Okay, so for those that don't know, we actually filmed this episode almost a year. Almost a year ago. And the episode got lost.

[B]

Is. And it's the only time.

[A]

It's the only time it's ever happened. The episode got lost, but now it was almost like a blessing because we actually became really close friends in between then and now.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So now this makes more sense.

[B]

I was. I could tell you were stressed when you texted me that the episode was Lost. And I truly.

[A]

You were happy.

[B]

I was thrilled. I could not have been happier. It was. I blacked out. I had slept the night before, like an hour, and. And I was shaking. And I had met you once before, and once. And I think, like, that's so bad. That's going to be bad.

[A]

Well, now this makes more sense because we actually have so many experiences to talk about.

[B]

We've lived so much life together now.

[A]

We have. Because as I say, you are my most adventurous friend.

[B]

It's. You say this to me all the time, and it's upsetting because I'm. I'm sorry.

[A]

You got me out of the house on a Wednesday.

[B]

That's true. I do that. I also, like, whenever I come to your house, I. I appreciate more. So when you come meet me on the east side because it's not close.

[A]

I prefer the east side.

[B]

I think I know, but you live. I mean, it's nice over here. I understand.

[A]

It's quiet.

[B]

It's quiet. I was born close by.

[A]

You were?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

It's not. It's just, you know. But like, I love a long Uber ride because I obviously don't drive, and.

[B]

I actually, by the way, I think you're onto something. I think I'm done driving. Really? I'm done. I've done it enough.

[A]

You know what?

[B]

What?

[A]

I get it. I'm over get it. And I don't even drive.

[B]

I don't. I'm over it. I've driven so much. I'm a bad driver.

[A]

You're not a bad driver, Jake.

[B]

Have I driven you?

[A]

No. Wait. Yes, you have.

[B]

Have I?

[A]

No.

[B]

No.

[A]

No, you haven't. No, no. Yes. No. I'm trying to think. Every time. It's not you driving.

[B]

No, no, no. That's because I'm bad at it. And if there's someone else that can drive, I have them.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Okay. So, yeah, I wouldn't drive either. I think I'm gonna be done.

[A]

I got it.

[B]

I've retired. I'm done.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I did drive here.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I can drive you tonight.

[A]

And we're driving to dinner.

[B]

It is so funny that, like, we know each other so well, and the second we start doing this, I feel like I've never met you before.

[A]

I know. I feel the same way. We know each other. We know each other really well.

[B]

So we've.

[A]

We just took a trip together.

[B]

We were in Portland together.

[A]

We were in Portland together and we had the best time.

[B]

It was so fun.

[A]

I. I mean. Well, you took me to nature for the first time. I've never done that before, you guys. Kaya was like, will was there too. And they were like, okay, like, let's go to a watering hole. What was it?

[B]

Yeah, swimming hole.

[A]

A swimming hole in Portland.

[B]

And I wanted you to get in the hole.

[A]

I got in once and you got in the hole. And then I was like, I'm done.

[B]

It was so wonderful to see you in nature. I have such great videos of you trying to walk down a steep hill. But that wasn't even really nature. That was nature in the middle of a city.

[A]

Well, it's because I kept being like, okay, I'm in nature. I'm in nature. And then I would look out and there was a Holiday Inn Express and we were under a highway.

[B]

So, like, we were like two minutes from a McDonald's.

[A]

So I was like, okay, this isn't the nature that I was sold.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Like, if anything, it's better.

[B]

We sold you the dream and we under delivered and I'm sorry.

[A]

No, you guys were, you guys were jumping off cliffs.

[B]

I did jump off a cliff.

[A]

And I. Injure yourself.

[B]

No, Kyle did.

[A]

Yeah. I was about to say Kyle hurt himself. Right.

[B]

Because when you see a cliff, you're like, I gotta try that. Right.

[A]

And it doesn't look as high as it feels.

[B]

And you do it once and it's amazing. And then, and then to, to re, to want to do it again, to return to it is crazy. Like, he, he jumped multiple times, which I was like, that's a mistake. You do it once, you're safe, you're grateful you had the experience, and then you swim to shore. But they were jumping it multiple times. And that's, I think, why the injury happened.

[A]

Where did he get injured?

[B]

His shoulder.

[A]

I have great videos of you guys jumping on my little camcorder.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You were, you were vlogging.

[A]

I was vlogging. I totally forgot about that. And I need to get them on my.

[B]

Jake was like, fully clothed. Video camera out, like, flip it flipped out. And you were just sitting up on a rock at like the highest peak, sort of in a huddle, trying not to be on your phone, which I really appreciated. And, and then after five minutes, Jake looks at me and is like, okay, what am I supposed to do now?

[A]

I didn't get it. And then like, also, like, we were sitting there and then I, I, I couldn't, I hadn't, like, I didn't want to ruin anyone's vibe. So I didn't want to say like, hey, when are we going?

[B]

You said when Are we going? Starting 20 minutes in.

[A]

Right, so 20 minutes. And I eventually started saying, when. What's the vibe?

[B]

Like we should go.

[A]

And no one agreed with me because everyone was enjoying themselves in nature. And we saw. And we saw weapons, which was my type of day.

[B]

We. That was actually. Was that the same day as the swimming hole?

[A]

No, I can, you know, I can't do both.

[B]

That was.

[A]

That was too many activities we did.

[B]

We did weapons and then swimming. We did weapons and then swimming.

[A]

We did weapons on Saturday, swimming pool on Sunday.

[B]

That was really, really, really a great weekend.

[A]

It was the best weekend ever. It was the most wholesome.

[B]

It was so fun.

[A]

And then we got dinner Monday night.

[B]

Yeah. And then you left.

[A]

That was depressing for me.

[B]

You are such a star. Can I just say? You are. You are. No, you are. No, I'm just gonna do it once and then I'm not gonna do it again.

[A]

You can do it.

[B]

I know. And you're gonna love it. You. I got to see you on set. And my favorite part about seeing you on set was that everyone was coming up to me like I didn't already know how incredible you are and like delivering the news to me that you're a superstar and. And are gonna have this huge, massive career and that they never wanna make a movie without you. And I was like, you're telling me who is his self proclaimed best friend? Which you can say that I'm not, but I.

[A]

No, you are.

[B]

We had a discussion.

[A]

We had a discussion about it.

[B]

Is it okay if I refer to.

[A]

You as my best friend?

[B]

And you said, I've been doing that already, so it works, but they just were obsessed with you and kept adding you to things and it was your first movie.

[A]

It was my first movie. It was amazing and was so fun.

[B]

And you're so funny.

[A]

It was so. It was like the most. You want to know how I knew I was having a good time?

[B]

How?

[A]

That room we were in for the scenes that I was shooting on Monday was so hot.

[B]

I got locked in that room.

[A]

Do you remember how hot that room was? Did you hear me complain once? No, not once.

[B]

Yeah, and you hate being hot.

[A]

I hate being hot.

[B]

Don't you sleep with your.

[A]

Yep, I sleep. I got.

[B]

Just got a fan delivery. Did you not see the minus 10?

[A]

Yep, the.

[B]

Yes, I have the same mattress as you.

[A]

You have an eight sleep, of course. Oh, I'll sleep over.

[B]

You will, because you can turn yours down on your side of the bed.

[A]

Wait, I didn't know you had an eight sleep. On that.

[B]

Of course I do.

[A]

I'll sleep over.

[B]

And I have a Lola now, too.

[A]

Okay. We are Lola girls.

[B]

We are Lola girls. I was sleeping with one, unknowingly. Oh, I had one, but I didn't know what it was. And I just was like, this is so soft. And then you started talking to me about Lola, and then I ordered one and it came, and it was the.

[A]

Exact same because Charlie and I were like, it's a lifestyle.

[B]

But the XL changes everything.

[A]

The xl? It's heavy. You know, it's low key kind of weight.

[B]

It's a weighted blanket. But, like, it's a weighted blanket.

[A]

It's weighted. It's good for my anxiety.

[B]

I also don't use a comforter anymore.

[A]

Wait, I don't either.

[B]

I literally.

[A]

I only use my Lola.

[B]

It's the best. Sometimes it slides off in the middle.

[A]

Oh, always. But that just shows you how soft.

[B]

It is, because then I, like, wake up and I'm like, right?

[A]

And then you pull it back on, and then you get to wake up and be like, oh, my God, it's 3:00am I have a few hours left.

[B]

Yeah, I. I also know that you hate being hot. And that room was so warm. Not one and the worst lighting ever. And you didn't complain once. And then you left. And I was like, I'm just gonna use Jake's room because you had the nicest room of anyone.

[A]

It was a really nice room.

[B]

You had the nicest room. And then I got locked in there because they started shooting towards the door and I. And I couldn't leave. So I did a bunch of research on Punxsutawney Phil. Oh, do you know about Punxsutaw the groundhog? Yeah.

[A]

Do you know I used to do Puss Hog Day where I would.

[B]

What is.

[A]

I would wake up and decide if it was spring or not. That was it. That was it. I'll show you videos of it. It was electric.

[B]

Wait, I saw you doing the, like, 0.99 of germs.

[A]

Did you like that one?

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

That one came to me in a vision.

[B]

It was so funny. Yeah, it was so funny. I just sit and watch because people are really inventive.

[A]

They are really.

[B]

And then you really take it to the next level. It's really funny. The Mary Magdalene one, too.

[A]

The Mary Magdalene ones were my favorite series I've ever done.

[B]

That was great. And then also Noah's Ark.

[A]

The particle. The particle.

[B]

So funny. It was incredible.

[A]

Oh, and you want to know my favorite part of that? Whole shoot. What was. You remember when I shot the scene, it was Lewis and Maya in the car.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I ran away, and then they called me back, and they. And because we were improving, but I didn't know we were improving.

[B]

Yeah. That was confusing because you were. You were running out of that shot.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And I don't know where you were going, but somewhere far on a busy.

[A]

It was down a hill.

[B]

And then I just hear, like, come back, Come back. And you came back so confused because.

[A]

Graham was like, they're calling you. They're calling you. And I was like, I don't have my phone. And then I. I walked back in, and I think, like. And I. And. And I was like, what? And then he was like, no, you're in the scene. And I was like, oh.

[B]

I'm ready now.

[A]

And it was great.

[B]

You put your glasses back on, and you said. It was so funny. But I think you have one of the hardest jobs on that movie, which is coming in once it's already been established and everyone knows each other.

[A]

Right. It's scary.

[B]

And getting thrown into an environment that you haven't been acclimated to yet.

[A]

It's scary.

[B]

And you did such a good job.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

They literally couldn't get enough. They kept adding stuff.

[A]

I know. And remember, I tried to stay. I was like, I can stay for the week.

[B]

I wanted you to.

[A]

I wanted to stay so bad once you left.

[B]

I just was really sad.

[A]

It's crazy that that all came from my crash out over a boy.

[B]

It was that crash out that got you that job.

[A]

He got me a role in a movie.

[B]

So, like, we're not gonna thank him because he doesn't deserve to be thanked because it was really you that got yourself the role in the movie.

[A]

We were, like. I was letting it rip for, like, 60 minutes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And Graham was just sitting there, like. And then I started a movie.

[B]

And then you got a role in a movie.

[A]

And then I got a real movie. Speaking of rules and things, you are in the shards.

[B]

I am. Have you read it?

[A]

No. And I. It's in my room next to my bed. It's in my room next to my bed, and I'm gonna read it.

[B]

Zero preparation for the interview is crazy.

[A]

No, I'm really excited. You know, reading's hard for me.

[B]

You can listen to it.

[A]

No, I'm gonna read.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I'm really excited.

[B]

Reading's not hard for you.

[A]

Yes, it is.

[B]

Why is it hard for you?

[A]

Because I have the attention span of a goldfish. It's crazy to me how much you read. It is one of the most underrated things about you. I had no idea how much you read.

[B]

I. Yeah, I do read.

[A]

Do you, like, read in your sleep? Because, like, sometimes, like, you'll tell me, like, oh, I read this book. I read this book, and I'm like, when? Because I've hung out with you all week, and there was no reading involved, but somehow you're finding the time to read these books.

[B]

I mean, it's hard to read around a lot of people.

[A]

Well, of course. That's what I'm saying. But you find the time.

[B]

Yeah. I'll read it before bed or in the morning or on planes.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I just took your breath away in the morning.

[A]

It's just like, I can't imagine waking up and reading.

[B]

Oh, it's. That's actually great. That's the best time.

[A]

Tell me why.

[B]

Because you're. You're usually. You're, like, grabbing your phone.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then your day is just already intruded upon by all these people.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And when you read, no one can reach you.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

And I actually think reading is a muscle. And the more you do it, the better your attention span gets.

[A]

Okay. Because it's hard.

[B]

If I take a week off, I go back to read, and I have, like, 20 minutes before I'm like, okay, do something else.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Now, you saying that. That it's a muscle has made me believe that I can do it.

[B]

You can 100 do it. Anyone can do it. You got it. Well, maybe not everyone can do it.

[A]

No. Oh, Leah.

[B]

Michelle can do it.

[A]

Lea. Michelle can do it. She can read.

[B]

That was the best when you got her to read.

[A]

Dude. It's crazy, because manifestation's real.

[B]

I literally the biggest Glee fan.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

By the way, speaking of Ryan Murphy.

[A]

Glee.

[B]

Glee.

[A]

Have you ever spoken to him about Glee?

[B]

No. And I need to.

[A]

You need to.

[B]

That show raised me in a huge way.

[A]

Well, I. Before we did that interview, in my head, I had this moment where I was like, I'm not going to ask her about the reading. I'm just not. I'm not that type of person. Like, I'm not going to ask her.

[B]

You want to do so bad.

[A]

In my manifestation dreams, I hope that she picks up the tell me what's wrong and starts reading. I swear to God. And she did it. And in that moment, the room, you could hear a pin drop.

[B]

It was so powerful.

[A]

It was so powerful. It was my shining moment.

[B]

It was amazing. Next question.

[A]

Wait, but so are you. When do You. When do you start? Are you. How are you prepping for the shards? How do you prep for a role?

[B]

It's different for everything. I just got the first two episodes, so before that, it was just reading the book. Like, that was the nice thing about it being based on other material is like, there's. You have access, right, To. You know, I don't know how much they're gonna stay true to it and how much they're gonna change, but, like, you have access to at least some kind of starting point. But I don't know. I'm playing like an LA kid, so it's not that I. I don't know how different it will be from myself.

[A]

But what's in the 80s, right?

[B]

It's in the 80s, which I wasn't alive for.

[A]

See some research.

[B]

Yeah. You know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think it's gonna be fun. And honestly, I love Ryan Murphy. Like, I didn't realize Glee was camp when I watched it because I was probably too young to understand camp, but he does that so well. He.

[A]

Yeah, he's like the master of camp. And television camp.

[B]

Like, intellectual camp.

[A]

Like Scream Queens.

[B]

Oh, my. That's a genius show.

[A]

I've never seen Nip Tuck, though, and I really want to.

[B]

Neither have I. And I would like to see it.

[A]

Are you a TV person?

[B]

I am. I used to be more than now.

[A]

But I'm like a very.

[B]

You watch everything you read.

[A]

Watching Scandal, I watch for the third time.

[B]

You've seen it in its entirety?

[A]

I've seen it. I've seen it. Okay. So I watched it when I was a kid up to season four, then I stopped. Then I rewatched it during COVID in its entirety. And before COVID I had re watched season one and two. So this must be like the third time I've rewatched it all.

[B]

I see. But I don't understand how you have time. Like, if you have time to watch this many TV shows, you would read.

[A]

More books than I. I know, I know. But something about.

[B]

Have you ever seen the phone while you're.

[A]

Sometimes. Okay, that's it.

[B]

That's. I understand the rewatch when you want to have phone time and also have noise.

[A]

Have you ever seen Scandal?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I think you're gonna say it's the best show in the world.

[A]

No, it's not. It's not. Okay. There's just, like, I've never felt those emotions about a show before like, that I do about Scandal.

[B]

What do you mean? Like, strong emotions.

[A]

They're like the tension between Kerry Washington and Tony Goldwyn.

[B]

Is he the president?

[A]

Yes. It is like something I've never witnessed in television before.

[B]

You know which president I love in tv? James Marsden.

[A]

Oh, in Paradise. Oh, we will that show. We bonded.

[B]

My, my president, I loved him in that show.

[A]

I was actually talking about that show today with my brother.

[B]

I feel like you're the only other person that I know that watched it.

[A]

No, that show, that show changed my life.

[B]

It was so good and it was such a random. Like that's so not the kind of show I would watch but I found it and when there's that drone shot at the end that then I don't want to give any spoilers away but that. The ending of the first episode, I was like.

[A]

And the needle drop of. What was it like?

[B]

Oh yeah.

[A]

Another day in paradise or something. So sick.

[B]

Great music in that show too.

[A]

Season two of that show is going to be so different than season one now and I'm so excited.

[B]

Also Julianne Nicholson, I was talking about her today. She's so good.

[A]

She's so good.

[B]

She's in hacks and she's really good in Blonde.

[A]

What's Blonde?

[B]

The Marilyn Monroe movie.

[A]

I've never seen it.

[B]

Andrew Dominic. Have you seen any Andrew Dominic movie? He did these, this two part film series for Nick Cave and it's so wonderful. Have you seen it, Nolan?

[A]

All I know is killing them softly.

[B]

Okay. Also great. Yeah, he. There are these like beautiful set of films that he did for Nick Cave that.

[A]

I love Nick Cave.

[B]

I love you.

[A]

Who is Nick Cave? I thought you were talking.

[B]

Sometimes I'm like, we're so similar. And then sometimes our tastes just could not be more opposite.

[A]

It's like I'm watching Scandal and you're reading books, right?

[B]

I'm re watching the Office still.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Have you seen it?

[A]

No, I've never seen the Office.

[B]

You are a comedian.

[A]

I know. Oh, thank you.

[B]

You are.

[A]

Thank you. I've never seen the Office.

[B]

A comedian.

[A]

A person I would like.

[B]

You're not a personality. I mean, you have a personality.

[A]

I would like to say comedian, like comedian is what I aspire to say, but I'm scared that someone will be like, no, he's not. So I just don't know.

[B]

You're a comedian. I don't care what anyone says. That's insane.

[A]

I, I said it.

[B]

So you a comedian? Where? What camera do I like? That's a comedian.

[A]

You heard it from her.

[B]

You are.

[A]

And you're not going to disagree with her.

[B]

So you should watch though, one more Time with feeling. And I think the other one, as I know this much is true.

[A]

Okay, It's.

[B]

They're really sad, but they're beautiful and really cool films. But then, Andrew, how did I get on this? Andrew Dominic directed Blonde, which Julianne Nicholson is in. And she's really wonderful. She plays Norma Jean's mom.

[A]

Norma Jean is Marilyn Monroe. Is Marilyn Monroe, right?

[B]

Yes. Okay, next question. Next question. This is going well.

[A]

Sometimes I just feel like I don't know anything, but I know everything.

[B]

What, you know everything that you need to know.

[A]

You know what I learned about you while we were in Portland?

[B]

What?

[A]

People work out on the weekends. You guys. People work out on the weekends?

[B]

Yeah, we worked out together. You work out?

[A]

I mean, never on the weekends. No, no. I lasted five minutes.

[B]

Headphones died.

[A]

My head. Well, the first time I did 12.

[B]

3, 30, which, by the way, I've never successfully gotten through a 12, 3, 30.

[A]

It's hard.

[B]

I do 12, 3, 20.

[A]

Okay. It's hard.

[B]

30.

[A]

30 is hard. But then. Then. Day two, headphones gone. It was a Sunday. I was like, this isn't happening.

[B]

It was overly ambitious to try to work out on the weekend. But I was glad that we did it.

[A]

Me, too.

[B]

It was fun. And I liked seeing you in the gym. You actually look so good.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. And I've seen you in every state and with as little clothing as possible, and you look amazing.

[A]

You.

[B]

Yeah, I've seen you basically naked.

[A]

Basically.

[B]

And you look very good.

[A]

I feel like I've really been working out.

[B]

Look at that. Wait, show it. Don't. Yeah, look at that.

[A]

Like.

[B]

Is that Louie?

[A]

Yeah, that's Louie.

[B]

You look so good.

[A]

I. I do. I did 55s today.

[B]

I've never lifted anything that.

[A]

It was hard.

[B]

Sometimes a child will ask me to pick them up.

[A]

You're like.

[B]

And I'm like, no, I can't.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I can't do that.

[A]

You are like. You know what's crazy? Back to you being my most adventurous friend.

[B]

It's insane that you think that, but. Yeah.

[A]

Do you remember the Fourth of July, too? I was also in nature.

[B]

Yeah. We scaled the mountain together.

[A]

You realize I don't do that. Like, I don't know how to, like, emphasize that enough.

[B]

When you say that I'm your most adventurous friend, do you mean, like, I'm cool party adventurous or I'm like, nature adventurous?

[A]

They're all the same.

[B]

So across the board.

[A]

Across the board.

[B]

I'm your most.

[A]

Like, it's Tuesday night, and you're like, come meet us at blank. And I'm like, it's Tuesday. And like, okay, I'm leaving the house. I guess you do it.

[B]

You come.

[A]

I know, I know.

[B]

You show up.

[A]

I show. I show up.

[B]

And you're like, the most entertaining person ever. It's so fun to watch people meet you for the first time. You know, I was thinking about this on the drive here. I have never heard someone say something bad about you. Oh, my God, never.

[A]

People have. No people.

[B]

Well, not to me. Maybe they know that I would kill them if they did.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

Probably because I have this look where it's like, don't even think.

[A]

Well, I love all your friends, and I love making Louis laugh.

[B]

He is very generous with his laughter. But you do have to earn it. But once it comes, well, that's so gratifying.

[A]

That's why I put on the show. Because, like, when we're out at dinner and he starts laughing, I'm like, okay, like, I'm going to keep it going. Like, I'm going to keep it going.

[B]

He always says to me, and we're like, how are you and Will single? But then I think about the people in the world that are available or that at least I know that are available and they're not worthy.

[A]

Dating in L. A. Is really hard for me. Just as a gay guy, it's really hard for me.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, what do you think you are looking for? Do you want more of it? Like. Like, do you want a monogamous relationship? Do you want, like, a more traditional relationship?

[A]

I think just to start. Look, I'm so open to anything eventually, but I think for my first boyfriend, I'd like it to be monogamous.

[B]

Well, also, I think in order to be open, you have to have trust. And to have trust, you have to.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Get to know each other and know that you can be monogamous.

[A]

My thing is just, like, I don't know, I feel like I'm so selfish and so busy that it's, like, hard for me to, like, give someone else my attention.

[B]

Right. But I do think totally. But I think that's a really, actually great quality to have because I used to be the opposite way where, like, I would completely just change my personality, my values for someone 100. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I always dated people that were older than me. And so I was very willing to give up everything. Like, I was like, I can show you I love you by completely giving up my life for you. Which is actually not how you build respect and trust and is not good in the long run. Because then you start to like, bring a little bit more of who you really are into the relationship. And they're like, no, I liked that person before, but that wasn't you fault. It's like my fault.

[A]

But yeah, well, it's also their fault.

[B]

They're not, not, they're not all know, innocent. But yeah, I think that that's a big thing. And I also, like, I was literally talking about this the other day with Lou where we were like, the amazing thing about you is the person that ends up loving you is going to be so obsessed with you because you are such a specific person that they're just going to like, die for you and die for every single part of you. I believe this so much. And if they don't, then like, like, don't you dare shave your legs.

[A]

Oh my God, I want to shave my legs so bad. I texted Kyra the other day and I was like, how do I, like.

[B]

How do I remove the hair?

[A]

How do I remove the hair from my body?

[B]

Don't you dare.

[A]

I saw this tick tock. And it was like, you need to shave your legs. And I was like, damn. Okay. I shaved like a patch. I told you.

[B]

What did you, did you shave it with a razor?

[A]

No, I just did like a little.

[B]

Did you do a narrative?

[A]

I did a little like, like I did this razor and it's so bumpy now.

[B]

Don't do it. I mean, obviously do whatever makes you happy, but don't do it because maybe I'll trim it. Okay. Okay. This is. I truly believe this. They are lucky to even be in the position where you would have sex with them. So they can't then start putting like parameters up of like, or, you know, non negotiables. That's insane.

[A]

I know, it was crazy.

[B]

They should be so lucky.

[A]

It was crazy.

[B]

But they should be like licking your leg hair.

[A]

Oh, thank you.

[B]

And swallowing it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That's what I think.

[A]

I want to wax it so bad just to see what it's like.

[B]

But also I think you're gonna feel really naked.

[A]

Do guys, do actors, like wax themselves for TVs and movies though? Yes. Right?

[B]

You're asking me because I've dated a lot of actors?

[A]

No, I'm asking you because you're an actress.

[B]

Well, it's different, I'm sure. For. I think it, it depends what the role requires. I, I wouldn't shave my legs for a role. I mean, I shave my legs for myself sometimes if I'm feeling like it. You know what I Love is an everything shower. Do you know what that is?

[A]

I do, but I never do it because. Well, actually.

[B]

What?

[A]

I've started skincare recently.

[B]

What do you mean? Like on the.

[A]

I've never washed my face before.

[B]

You have perfect skin. It's always the people that don't wash their face.

[A]

So I never wash my face. But I started using road.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I really with it.

[B]

I saw you post a picture wearing road and your skin was glowing.

[A]

Look at it right now.

[B]

Are you wearing it right now?

[A]

Glazing milk.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I use the face wash. The glazing milk. And then I.

[B]

The pineapple face wash. I use that too. It takes your makeup off really well. Nothing. I pointed at you and say your makeup.

[A]

No, but no, you know what? I would use it though. No.

[B]

Chapel Rowan drag.

[A]

Yes. No. Well, that nothing took that makeup off. I show up to set the next day for craft Mac and cheese and there was like black eyeliner under my eye and I was like, yeah, this is what you guys are getting. And I'm really sorry about it.

[B]

Sometimes your life is so funny. It's so insane.

[A]

It's so. Yeah, like what? You saw what I texted you today about.

[B]

Oh, about.

[A]

Somebody texted me, oh my God.

[B]

Oh yeah.

[A]

Somebody texted me, I will not name this person. But like they texted me happy birthday. And I said, oh my God blank. I miss you, but it's not my birthday. And they said, oh, so when's your birthday? And I said, October 27th. Why? And they said, cuz usually the people that say they miss me, I would know their birthday. Who is this? And I said, this is Jake. And they said, oh, wrong number. You're not Kiki Palmer. I said, what?

[B]

It's so funny.

[A]

It was actually that's a real conversation I had today, but that's like normal for you. And I was like, damn. It was one of the funnier things that had happened to me in the past week.

[B]

I got a really lovely happy birthday text a month ago and it was not my birthday, but it was so nice. And it said happy birthday Kaya. They didn't think I was Kiki Palmer. They said happy birthday Kaya. And like all these amazing, lovely things. And I literally just said, thank you so much.

[A]

Oh, you didn't tell them? No, I. Maybe I shouldn't have told them.

[B]

Well, no, because then maybe like that person actually now can reach out to Kiki Palmer because maybe it is her birthday.

[A]

Is it Kiki Palmer's birthday?

[B]

I think she's a Virgo.

[A]

Is Kiki Palmer.

[B]

Happy Birthday.

[A]

Happy birthday, Kiki Palmer. Wow. You know, that was crazy.

[B]

That is so funny.

[A]

But also, like, Kiki Palmer deserves more than just a happy birthday. No, no, exclamation point. Not. There was nothing.

[B]

It was just happy birthday.

[A]

Happy birthday.

[B]

You know when you say congrats or congratulations, it automatically sends confetti.

[A]

Yeah. I love it.

[B]

And also, how do you turn the thing off of zoom, where it celebrates for you?

[A]

What?

[B]

You know, where if you do a certain hand gesture and it goes.

[A]

Gives you the thumbs up.

[B]

I was on a zoom where someone was telling me a really personal sad story.

[A]

Oh, Jesus Christ.

[B]

And it was a director and it was really, like, lovely that they were opening up in that way. And I was listening really intently and I think I just went like this or something. And balloon started or. No, no, no, no. It was the laser show and it got dark all around me and then it was rave lasers. And I literally was like, I'm so sorry.

[A]

Did they laugh?

[B]

No, they were like, it's okay.

[A]

Okay. Like, God.

[B]

I was like, this is the worst thing that could have happened right now. And I'm so sorry. It was terrible.

[A]

What? I don't know. I don't think you can turn that off.

[B]

I mean, that you should be able to because it's really inappropriate sometimes when it happens. It was the worst. It was horrible. I didn't get that job, obviously.

[A]

So I. Yeah. I don't know how you actors do it.

[B]

Well, you do because you're auditioning now.

[A]

I am. And it really hurts every time.

[B]

It doesn't stop hurting.

[A]

But you. You give the best advice about it. Like, it's not meant for you.

[B]

I give the advice that I wish I listened to. When it comes to me, there's no consoling me.

[A]

Right.

[B]

But it does make me feel slightly better. Like, all the rejection is worth it when I can actually give you advice on it. But I do believe that, like, either a role was always yours or never yours. That's true.

[A]

Do you like. Do you think that, like, it hurts more when you're closer to it and you don't get it?

[B]

100.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

When you do a self tape and don't hear anything back, you're like, well, yeah, you know, who cares, right? When they're like, they're really interested. Do another one. You're. You start to get excited. Even if it's a project that you weren't excited about before, suddenly you start caring about things that you didn't actually care about.

[A]

Right?

[B]

And then they're like. And we actually still, we saw more of you, and we don't like it. Then you're like, oh, okay, it hurts. It hurts. I don't know if I'm very good at auditioning, but I think you're also the kind of actor that, like, you're just gonna get roles because you're so right for it.

[A]

Well, I don't think I can do something that's not. Doesn't check out with, like, my. I don't think people would buy it.

[B]

Like what?

[A]

Like, I don't think I could. Remember the other day I tried to play straight, and you were like, just do it. I was like, I don't think anyone's gonna buy this. I didn't get it.

[B]

So, I mean, people say that I can't play straight either.

[A]

What?

[B]

Yeah, that was my big feedback when I did bottoms, as they were, like, my one note is that, like, we don't believe that Kaya's straight. I mean, I didn't think my character was straight. She was written straight, but I definitely was not believing it.

[A]

Was bottoms the first acting thing you ever did?

[B]

No, I did American Horror Story. Ryan Murphy.

[A]

I forgot about that. And was that. Was it What? Like, were you, like. Did you grow up watching American Horror Story?

[B]

Yes, I watched every season.

[A]

Which is your favorite?

[B]

Okay. I have two. Okay. I love. I love the first season. It's like, near and Dear and also the twins in the beginning, Bodhi and Kai. I went to school with them, so that was huge in my town. It was like, Bodhi and Kai have hit it big. They're an American Horror Story. Then I love Colt, which is. I know, weird. Wait, when Evan Peters has blue hair.

[A]

Did I watch Cole? I watched Coven. No, I didn't watch Cole.

[B]

I watched especially now in today's climate. It's actually so good. You should watch Cult. It's really scary because it's, like, super realistic. What's about. It's about, like, a political campaign and a cult.

[A]

Oh, yes. I never saw this.

[B]

You should. Evan Peters is so good in it.

[A]

Okay, I need to watch it.

[B]

And I was freaking out because I'm, like, the biggest American Horror Story fan. And they kind of pitched the character that I was playing to me. Like, I mean, they didn't pitch it to me. I auditioned and I explained the character. When they explained the character, they were like, it's kind of like the modern, like, Tate, who was Evan Peters in Season one. And I was like, don't do this to me. And I got to wear the same shirt that says Normal People scare me and I freaked out. It. My performance didn't hit the same as Evan Peters performance, but just total. It didn't. And that's okay. We learn and we grow. But I loved doing that show and I'm such a fan. And then I also loved Freak Show. Did you watch that one?

[A]

That was the circus one, right?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I did.

[A]

Actually. I watched some of that one where.

[B]

Sarah Paulson plays the joined twins.

[A]

Yes. Perfect. Have you. You've seen Coven, right?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

That was like my.

[B]

That was your favorite.

[A]

That was my big one.

[B]

I love that show so much.

[A]

It's just exceptional.

[B]

It's exceptional again. And now I get to work with him again. It's very exciting. Yeah.

[A]

And the premise of this. I keep interrupting you. Have you noticed that?

[B]

I don't think that you're interrupting me. I think we're having a normal conversation.

[A]

Thank you so much. Thank you so much. So what is the concept of the shards? It's that it takes place in the 80s and there is a murder and you go to Beverly Hills High.

[B]

Yes. No, that's not correct.

[A]

But.

[B]

The. The premise of the shards, it's kind of auto fiction. Do you know what that is? Okay, so auto fiction. Auto fiction is. It's like autobiography slash fiction. So it's like when people kind of.

[A]

Next time I'll read context clues.

[B]

Yeah, it's okay. When it's like a retelling of someone's life with fiction.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

So it's Brett Easton Ellis life story or in high school when he was. Was around the time he was writing Less than zero. But it's obviously like heightened and kind of imagined, but the names are real. People that he went to high school with, he went to Buckley. So it's. It's sort of based in truth and it's about a group of wealthy kids who go to Buckley High and they there starts being murders and people start going missing and. And the main character, Brett, sort of is figure trying to figure out who did it. He thinks it's this new kid at school, Robert Mallory. And. And then kind of how chaos ensues within the friend group and the city.

[A]

Of Los Angeles not to be so toxic because I know that that's there's murder. But how interesting would your have your high school have been if there was a murder mystery and you were solving it within your friend group?

[B]

So interesting.

[A]

That sounds fascinating.

[B]

Not that I wish that upon anyone, but it. I think that's kind of why I don't know if there was actually a murder. At buckley in the 80s. But I think that's kind of. Brett was like, let me retell my high school experience in a little more of like, an interesting and right and creepy way. And it's scary. The book is really scary. And.

[A]

Oh, that's my type of book. Okay, you know what? I'm going to start it tonight.

[B]

It's scary.

[A]

After the dinner that I'm making you go to with me.

[B]

You're not making me. I'm excited.

[A]

Really?

[B]

I make you come out all the time with me.

[A]

Yeah, but I'm. I have fun.

[B]

All of our best friends moved to New York, so we sort of ended up together accidentally. But I'm grateful, and it was a good pairing.

[A]

I used the best pairing. We met at Travis's wig party. Who is now also in New York.

[B]

Yeah, well, he's here right now.

[A]

Oh, he is here right now.

[B]

Didn't you see him this weekend?

[A]

I did. Oh, I love Travis.

[B]

I love Travis.

[A]

My king.

[B]

I went to school with Travis.

[A]

Oh, you. You.

[B]

We met in middle school.

[A]

How'd you guys meet? Like, class.

[B]

He. He was friends with this boy named Chris, and they invited me. I was friends with the cool girls. Not cool at all. And he invited us to Chris's house, and we, like, hung out. And then I remember on the first week, or it was maybe homecoming of sixth grade, he Snapchat messaged me, are you coming to the game tonight? To which I responded, why? Because.

[A]

Do you think he was asking you on a date?

[B]

No, I just thought that they were trying to play a prank on me because boys didn't invite me places. So I was very sort of suspicious of the invite or of the ask. And I was like, why? What are you going to do to me there? And now he's my best friend. My best friends for life, right? Yeah. Yeah. He's. He knows where all the bodies are buried.

[A]

Friends. Like, those are scary, but great.

[B]

He could ruin my life.

[A]

Right? That's what I think about some of my best.

[B]

He knows exactly where it would hurt the most. I mean, truly. But he. But he doesn't. Thankfully.

[A]

That's my Alice.

[B]

Is that your.

[A]

Yeah. Alice would. Alice knows all.

[B]

Who's your longest friend?

[A]

Probably my. She. I used to have her babysit me because she was so cool. She was a senior when I was in seventh grade. But, like, I just wanted to hang out with her, but she would only hang out with me when I would. She would babysit. Sent me Imani, but we talk every day now. But she has known me since I was 12.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

That's probably my long time.

[B]

Are you the same person that you were at 12? I. I can feel that from you.

[A]

Same exact person.

[B]

I'm so glad. I see videos of you when you're younger, and I'm like, you literally haven't changed at all in the best way.

[A]

You know what? There's a lot of things I'll critique about myself. I am the same person, and I appre. And I appreciate that I've stayed true to myself.

[B]

You. You 100 have. And then people just caught on to you. I feel this way about, like, Charlie xcx. I'm you and Charlie xcx.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Because Charlie always just stayed true to herself, and then finally people caught up to her, but she was way ahead of everyone.

[A]

Do you. Did you listen to her? Like, what's your favorite album by her?

[B]

I mean, I loved, like, obviously, like, I love it and all of the. Yeah, all the. But I think, like, the most recent really, really grabbed me in a way that I wasn't expecting. But I've always loved her so much, and I think, like, it just took people a second to catch up to her. And I think, like, your success has been people just catching on to you rather than, like, you adjusting for people.

[A]

I really try to remind myself of that all the time. I'm really. Every time I feel myself adjusting, I'm like, I can't do this.

[B]

But it's hard because a lot of your videos are based off of comments, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So do you have to read the comments?

[A]

Yeah. And, like, even if I didn't, I would anyway. Do you read comments?

[B]

I don't let people comment on my Instagram.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Did you.

[A]

Was that always the case?

[B]

No, I'm just too sensitive. Yeah, I. I did for a long time, and then I stopped. My therapist was like, stop. And so I did stop, but it's so. It's too tempting. Like, not because I think I'm better than anyone. I'm actually very weak, and I would read all of them if they were there. So I just don't. I don't. I can't.

[A]

Have you ever let, like, one comment ruin your entire day?

[B]

Of course.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Especially when they point out an insecurity you hadn't thought of before.

[A]

Mine is like, you can calm. You can say I'm ugly. You can say whatever you want when they, like, critique my character.

[B]

But how do they know your character?

[A]

They don't, but they'll critique it anyway. And, like, that's what hurts the most.

[B]

Yeah. Yes. Yeah.

[A]

Where they're like, this guy seems like a bad guy.

[B]

That's insane.

[A]

That's, like, what kills me. But like that, because I have such bad ocd. And I know this sounds stupid, but one of, like, my ocds is that, like. And I. I thought. I didn't know this until I saw it on Tick Tock. Somebody was like, no, it's a symptom of OCD is thinking you're a bad person all the time. Or, like, thinking, like, you're gonna. You. You are not, like, just thinking you're a bad person. Like, thinking your intentions are bad is like a symptom of ocd.

[B]

Oh, thinking that you did something intentionally.

[A]

Yeah. And so, like, that is. I've always had that. And so when I read that, it, like, really. It, like, really upsets me.

[B]

Yeah, I'm. I truly, I am like the friend that the next morning has to hear that they're not mad that the people that were with me the night before were not mad at me.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think everyone's mad at me all the time. All the time.

[A]

I've never thought you were mad at me or. No, I've never. I've never heard of anyone ever being mad at you.

[B]

They have been. They've happened. The worst is when you think someone's mad at you and they are.

[A]

Because you're like, I was right. What else have I been right about?

[B]

Literally. Then you go, probably the 400 other people that I think are mad at me. I don't even know 400 people. And I assume that at least any given moment, 400 people are mad at me.

[A]

Right.

[B]

It's the worst. I mean, I have friends who will just text me once a day, not mad at you, because they know that I probably think that they are. It's a really nice thing to do for the people that you care about. I'll do it to you.

[A]

Can you?

[B]

But you never think I'm mad at you. And I honestly would never get mad.

[A]

At you, but I don't know, maybe can you start doing it?

[B]

Yeah, I'll do it.

[A]

I feel like Lewis, like, takes care of you so well and, like, you know what I mean? Like, he would be the type to text you. Not mad at you.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

It is so nice. I mean, one, especially in Portland, I felt like he was all of our boyfriend.

[A]

He was my boyfriend.

[B]

He was the group's boyfriend.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

He loves you and Will so much.

[A]

He's my everything.

[B]

Like, I really feel like a lot of the Appeal to me was you guys. Like, he was like, your friends are amazing. And I was like, it's a shock that they want to hang out with me, but I'm definitely. A lot is being healed in this relationship.

[A]

I can feel it by the way he is, like, you guys are, like, healthy.

[B]

I'm going to cry. No, it's true.

[A]

We mean it.

[B]

Thanks. It's true. It is. I really feel like if you have the opportunity to date a friend, do it, because, like, it just is so much better.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, I never want to fight with my friends. I never want to be mad at my friends. I respect my friends. It just is like, a whole other thing. And I think sometimes you forget that you like someone when you love them.

[A]

So I've never heard someone explain it that way. So it's like, you don't want to fight with your friends, but when you view someone as, like, just a boyfriend or just. Yeah, you're like, I can. Like, I'll fight with you.

[B]

Like, I truly feel like sometimes in relationships, and I know you've never been in one, but you will learn this. You get to a place where it's almost impossible to understand how love can get you there. Like, you're like, how can we get brought here by love?

[A]

Right?

[B]

And, like, what.

[A]

Like, how. How is this love?

[B]

Like, how is love the thing that carried us to this point of, like, hurt and pain and anger and all. And resentment and all those things when, like, love is supposed to be a really beautiful thing? So I really think, like, if you can date your friends, you should. Or date someone that you would be friends with anyways.

[A]

Right?

[B]

Don't date someone just because you're, like, sexually attracted to them and are in lust with them. You should sleep with those people.

[A]

Right?

[B]

For sure.

[A]

Right.

[B]

But you don't need to make them your partners.

[A]

Thank you, seatgeek, for sponsoring tonight's episode. My code has changed because the other one got leaked to people that do not watch this podcast. It is now just therapists for 10 off your SeatGeek order. And with that being said, see, let me tell you why you should use it. There are so many concerts happening right now. There's Lord on the ultrasound tour. There's Renee on the Bite Me tour. There's Megan Maroney on the Am I okay? Tour. She only has eight shows left. I'm about to personally see it myself this Thursday in la. I cannot wait. But there are just so many people on tour. Oh, Tate. Miss Possessive World Tour. I see that now twice. It is quite Literally one of the best shows I've ever seen in my entire life. There are so many shows to see in such little time. SeatGeek makes it possible to see all of them, but by providing you with the best deals on the best seats. If you go to the app and you put in where you are, they will show you popular events in your area that could be sporting, that could be a play, that could be a musical, that could be a concert, that could be a comedy show. And then when you scroll and it shows you the seats, it'll give you a little ranker from 1 to 10. 1 being not the best, 10 being the best. And that's how you know if you're getting a good deal on those seats. There are so many incredible artists on tour right now, and SeatGeek really does make it so simple and to just see all of them at an affordable price in great seats. Once again, that's code therapist for 10% off your order. You can click the link in the description of this video and it'll download the app and automatically add the code to your account to use. That's code therapist for 10% off your order. Thank you, se for sponsoring tonight's episode. Wait, so it's about to be your birthday, so I guess when this comes out, it'll be past your birthday. Oh, also, I'm taking the 11pm on.

[B]

The 3rd, so you can come to dinner. 7:30.

[A]

Great. I'll be there. Can I bring my luggage?

[B]

Of course.

[A]

Do you care?

[B]

Not at all. Why would I care?

[A]

Cool.

[B]

I'm so happy you'll be there.

[A]

I'll be there.

[B]

I need my best friend there.

[A]

I. And I need to go to my best friend's birthday.

[B]

It sounds good, doesn't it?

[A]

It feels good. It feels so good. Yeah. I can go and I'll leave at 9 or I'll leave at like 8:30. But I'll go.

[B]

But you'll come?

[A]

Yeah. Maybe I'll come to your house before.

[B]

That's cute. Let's do that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. Gorgeous. Thank God.

[A]

I'm so excited.

[B]

Are you so excited for life of a Showgirl?

[A]

Like you already know, like it's going.

[B]

To change my mind. We were at dinner when the announcement happened and you had to excuse yourself.

[A]

I said, everybody. Well, first of all, I told everybody. I said, I'm just letting everyone know. I think it was 9pm I am going to have to leave dinner. No, it was. It was 9:12 for us.

[B]

It was.

[A]

I'm going to have to leave dinner for 5 minutes. To experience this.

[B]

It was also so funny because it was a group of boys only. Who didn't understand the gravity and what it meant to you.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And so you had to excuse yourself. And they were all kind of like, what's going on?

[A]

Do you remember? And then. Do you remember? I was guessing what it was going to be before. Yeah. I was like, you were cosmos. I was so off.

[B]

What was the name that you guessed? It was, like, cosmic.

[A]

Cosmic Love Love. Cosmic, cosmic burn. Like, Because I was like, it's orange. It's like. It's reds. It's orange. It's cosmic. It's life of a showgirl.

[B]

So you're so excited I was off. And are you happy about the engagement?

[A]

I threw up. I almost threw up. Like, I. It's just because it's. She's been singing about wanting this for so long. So, like, seeing it come to fruition is so awesome.

[B]

You can find love.

[A]

You can find love. Yeah.

[B]

It doesn't matter how long it takes.

[A]

So much heartbreak and you can still find love.

[B]

It's so true. And I think she's the champion of that.

[A]

She is.

[B]

It's like, you can date as many people as you want, you can make as many mistakes as you want, and, like, eventually you're gonna find that person. It doesn't matter how long it takes.

[A]

Also, like, the way that their love story played out, I thought was really sweet. He literally just, like, shot his shot on his podcast. Said, I made her a friendship bracelet. She didn't get it. And then that's how they started. Do you not know that?

[B]

No.

[A]

That's how they started dating.

[B]

Wait, what did he do?

[A]

He went on his podcast, if I'm remembering correctly, and was like, I made Taylor Swift a friendship bracelet because she performed at. I think it was Arrowhead Stadium. Wherever he. Wherever he plays, he went. He was like, I made a friendship place that.

[B]

Which was part of the whole friendship.

[A]

Bracelet culture, and I didn't get to give it to her. And so I remember seeing, like, the news, like, Travis Kelce says, like, he got to give to. She heard, yeah, they're engaged now they're engaged, so never shoot your shot.

[B]

You ever slid into someone's DMs?

[A]

Yeah. And I. And honestly, it's never worked out in my favor, so I've stopped.

[B]

I do think, like. And you're on dating apps, too?

[A]

Yeah, I should.

[B]

I just. How do you know if you don't know their personality?

[A]

You. I. That's what I think. Well, that's why this guy I'm going on a date with. In New York. I didn't go on a date with him, but then I ran into him somewhere.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

And we re. Like, I felt we vibed.

[B]

Right. It's really hard to tell. Like, sometimes you see someone and you're like, no, not for me. And then you meet them, and you're like, whoa.

[A]

For me?

[B]

For me, Right? Please.

[A]

Well, that's the issue with dating apps, I think, is that it's sometimes hard to, like, just look at someone and be like, yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. What's your worst date story?

[B]

Date story.

[A]

Probably the time I went on the.

[B]

Date and was this denim one? Denim?

[A]

Yeah. And he told me, this isn't it. It's not a date. Because I was just so embarrassed.

[B]

Okay, but I don't think that's your fault.

[A]

But I was embarrassed. Like, I was really embarrassed.

[B]

This is what makes me very sad, is, like, when something like that happens, we get embarrassed, even though the other person should be embarrassed.

[A]

Right?

[B]

Like, yeah, I've been stood up, and I was so embarrassed.

[A]

You've been stood up? No way. Wait, what?

[B]

But it was an accident, okay? It was an accident. He fell asleep.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But I was, like, sitting at a bar, waiting, waiting, and I was like, this is the most embarrassing thing. I'll never recover from this.

[A]

Right?

[B]

And then I was like, why am I embarrassed? But it's like, it happens. I feel this way also, like, when people get cheated on and, like, you feel embarrassed, and it's like, but why are you embarrassed? The other people should be embarrassed.

[A]

That's so true. I feel like it's just, like, a pride thing, maybe.

[B]

Yeah. Or you're like, how did I not catch on to that? But honestly, no, it's the other person's fault. And it is the denim on denim boy. That was his fault.

[A]

But at the time, I was like, did I misread things? And I don't think I did.

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no.

[A]

I really don't think I did.

[B]

I mean, didn't you meet on a dating app?

[A]

No, we met at an afterparty, but it was flirty. Like, I know.

[B]

I'm not. You're not crazy. Also, you're not someone who thinks that everyone's flirting.

[A]

No, I never think people are flirting with you.

[B]

Yeah, I don't think that that's ever. No, that's, you know, like, I'm actually.

[A]

The polar opposite of it, and I have to have someone be like, no, I think they're flirting with you. Yeah, I like you yeah. So for me to, like, think this, like.

[B]

No, there had to have been signs, some vibes. There had to have been signs.

[A]

One time, the first date I ever went on, we went on a second date and he was. Was 40 minutes late. That sucked.

[B]

But he showed up.

[A]

He showed up, but it was 40 minutes late. And I was like, this just isn't it for me.

[B]

Yeah, that's also first date. You should be on best behavior. So if it's already not going well, then, like, it's only gonna get worse.

[A]

But I'm excited to go. I like dating in New York a lot more than I like dating in la.

[B]

Well, I think maybe you have more.

[A]

There's more gay people maybe.

[B]

I think. Yeah. More gay people in New York. No, I think that it's just in la you tend to only date people who have the same job as you. Look at me. You. It's better. It's. It's nice to be like, there's more options in New York that you're around people who do all different kinds of things.

[A]

Did you like living in New York when you lived in New York?

[B]

I loved it. I loved it. I came back when the pandemic happened.

[A]

That's when you came back?

[B]

Yeah, I would have honestly stayed. And then I've just been working here, which is really nice, and, like, I'm from here, but I would like to go back, I think. But I would never leave you here.

[A]

Okay, cool.

[B]

I would never do that. And you can't leave me.

[A]

No, I'm not leaving you here. Because I was about to say, Louisiana is about to have a moment.

[B]

I know, because there was.

[A]

Its stock is low right now, and the best time to invest is when someone's stock is low.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It's true. No, because, like, I was talking about investments the other day and they were like the stock market so bad, but they're like, no, but that's the best time.

[B]

You buy.

[A]

You buy when it's low.

[B]

And then. And then.

[A]

And L. A. I just have this gut feeling that, like, we're about to get this, like, resurgence of, like, real, like, pre pandemic la.

[B]

I hope so.

[A]

I feel it.

[B]

I'm. I am enjoying it here right now.

[A]

I like, I am loving it here.

[B]

It is.

[A]

I'm having fun nights. Yeah, I drove around.

[B]

People are out on the street.

[A]

Right. I mean it. Well, at that one wine bar we go to, it stayed up until 3 something a.m. the other day.

[B]

I know, it's so fun. And people are, like, smoking cigarettes out on the street. Which I don't condone, but it just feels like not la. And this can be like New York. Yeah, I know New York.

[A]

I'm. I see good vibes for it, hopefully.

[B]

I hope so, because you and I are holding it down here.

[A]

We are holding it while everyone leaves down.

[B]

And Will and Charlie and.

[A]

I don't think Will and Charlie are gonna leave.

[B]

I don't think so either.

[A]

Do you think Travis will ever come back?

[B]

God, I hope so.

[A]

I think so.

[B]

I gotta find my husband here so he comes back quick.

[A]

I know. I know. Do you and Travis ever make, like, a marriage pact?

[B]

We. We don't have a marriage pact. But I do see, like, a domestic partnership where we raise our children in the same, at least vicinity of each other. I. I hope I have a child that's exactly like Travis. Oh. Like, I truly believe that if I have a son that is exactly like Travis, I will be the happiest woman on earth.

[A]

You need a gay son.

[B]

I need a gay.

[A]

You are, like, meant to have a gay son.

[B]

I. I'll be dead. I'll do everything in my power.

[A]

Like, you are meant to have a. Yes.

[B]

And that's what I want, Louise. I want it so bad. Of course I'll love my child no matter what their sexual preference is. But I would be very happy with a gay son.

[A]

I think that's a really big green flag. I always say that.

[B]

One thing I will say about my relationship with Travis, I don't know if you have this with Will or Charlie, is I'm like, some of the people I've dated have gotten off so easy because most of the things that I would require from a partner. Travis does, like, he picks me up from the airport.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

He's, like, taking me to doctor's appointments. He's the first person I call with, like, good or bad news. So I'm like. I kind of have had. I rely on him for more things than my partners, usually.

[A]

Right.

[B]

But now that he's in New York, we're being forced to have some independence, which is really hard. But I think good for us.

[A]

Was it sad when he left?

[B]

It kind of, like, just happened.

[A]

Well, he. Because that's what I felt like, too. It wasn't like. Like, when Julian Peyton left, it was a big to do. Like, I. We were like, pull. I ran after their car. Like, really?

[B]

Did you actually cry?

[A]

Yeah, I cried.

[B]

Was that the first time in a.

[A]

While in a really long time.

[B]

I was cathartic.

[A]

Well, I wasn't, like, sobbing, but I was like, Tears were falling.

[B]

That's great.

[A]

Felt great.

[B]

I love crying so much.

[A]

I was just sad like, because I've lived with Julia for four years or three years, so I was like, when you live with someone and they move, it's like, oh, my God. What the is happening? No, but you also travel so much.

[B]

Yeah, I go to New York all the time. I. I also see him all the time. We've done like long stints apart. It's okay. But it was. It was kind of like happened during a very busy time. And then I was in LA with a week of nothing to do and I was like, oh, he's not. I have no other relationships outside of this. But now I have you.

[A]

Best friends.

[B]

Best friends.

[A]

Best friends.

[B]

Which I think would have happened regardless if Travis date or not. I don't want you to think that you're like the replacement.

[A]

No. And I don't want you to think you're.

[B]

It's okay if I am.

[A]

No, but it's okay if I.

[B]

Big shoes to fill.

[A]

That's how I feel about Travis.

[B]

We can have all of them in our lives.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

And that's the beautiful thing.

[A]

Do you want to get into the. Tell me what's wrong.

[B]

Yeah. Are we supposed to do therapists?

[A]

Oh, my God. Sometimes I forget Kyla listens to therapists.

[B]

No, no, no, you don't understand, Jake. I have listened to every episode at least twice.

[A]

It's crazy that you. Because she'll know. She just said Nolan and I was like, wait, how do you know that? Also was shocked by that.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Nolan, I wouldn't forget you after the whole debacle with the last nemesis number one. I would never forget an enemy. No, actually, he's my hero.

[A]

So what are you therapist about?

[B]

I watched Barbarian the other night and I had never seen it. Have you seen it?

[A]

So good.

[B]

I'm therapist that more people aren't talking about Justin Long in Barbarian.

[A]

I love Justin Long.

[B]

That is the performance of a lifetime.

[A]

Did you see his cameo on Weapons?

[B]

Of course. But it didn't mean as much to me because I hadn't seen Barbarian yet.

[A]

He's amazing.

[B]

Well, because also he's so funny.

[A]

He's so funny and he seems like such a nice guy. So when he plays such an. And plays it off well, I know.

[B]

It'S that much more impressive. And when he's Was. Is like down in the basement with the tape measure getting the square footage.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[B]

It's. I was crying, laughing. He's so funny. So that's what I'm therapist about.

[A]

I think he might get enough credit for.

[B]

No, like the candles should always stay lit for Justin Long. That's how I feel.

[A]

What else is he and was he in like some 2000s rom coms?

[B]

I think so.

[A]

Is that where I'm like remembering him from? He was in New Girl.

[B]

What is it?

[A]

He was not in New Girl.

[B]

Yes, he was. Yes, he is. Wait, who is he?

[A]

A new girl againslinger.

[B]

Oh, he's the other teacher.

[A]

Yeah, he's the other teacher.

[B]

He's like the nerdy teacher on the turkey day. He. There's like a Thanksgiving episode and don't they find a dead body? Yes.

[A]

I've never seen New Girl. I've seen like two episodes. Oh my God. I know, I know. You love it.

[B]

Have to watch it.

[A]

Have you ever seen Search Party?

[B]

No. That's Cole. Isn't Cola Scola in that I need to watch.

[A]

It is the funniest show I've ever seen.

[B]

Who else is in Search Party? You don't know. It's okay.

[A]

I don't know but it a really great group of people.

[B]

I need to watch it.

[A]

Search Party. Have you seen the other two?

[B]

Yes. You actually told me to watch that.

[A]

I love.

[B]

So funny. What are you therapist about?

[A]

What am I therapist about?

[B]

Hush Falls.

[A]

Maybe. Maybe that. I don't know what we're getting for dinner yet.

[B]

I think we should go to Santo.

[A]

I want to go to Santo.

[B]

I think that's what we should.

[A]

I want to go to Santo.

[B]

Let's do that.

[A]

But I don't want to force Lewis to do something that he doesn't want to do. You won't be but one time I had sushi from. Because one time we were at Seco and they made me sushi at Santo. Do you remember that?

[B]

That you worked the room until you got exactly what you wanted and I was so impressed.

[A]

I came back to the table with a plate of sushi and it was really good.

[B]

Which is you had like eight pieces of sushi and I was like. Okay. At midnight.

[A]

Are you a Pillstone girl?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay, so I notoriously used to hate it and I've fallen in love with it.

[B]

What do you get there?

[A]

Salmon to Geary. It's the best salmon. Gary in Los Angeles at Hillstone. Yep.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yep. Would be shocked.

[B]

Okay, well, you.

[A]

Yes, I will. Thank you. Okay. So should we. I can't believe you remember therapist. No one ever remembers that. Not even Julia or them.

[B]

I. When I tell you I don't like being in silence because I Don't want the thoughts to start creeping in. And so I just listen to therapists over and over again. And when you released two episodes last week, I was like, yes.

[A]

What should did you listen to, Willis?

[B]

Of course.

[A]

How good was.

[B]

Well, you were unwell. I. I've never seen you like that.

[A]

I had like. I've never been so hungover. And what did you do?

[B]

Was that the night after? Wait, when did you record that?

[A]

It was then.

[B]

Was it after we went out and then you went out after we went. No.

[A]

Yep. It was that night. It was that night.

[B]

Yeah. That was that night. That's brave to do an episode the next day.

[A]

It was that night.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And yeah, I was terrified. I woke up terrified.

[B]

That's the worst feeling. I haven't had a drink in three weeks and I have to say my anxiety is better and my sleep is better.

[A]

I'm not drinking this week.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I feel great.

[B]

Neither am I.

[A]

And I feel great.

[B]

Isn't your sleep better?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I just was like, oh, you. Everyone wakes up with crippling anxiety. And then I was like, no, no, that's alcohol, actually.

[A]

Turns out I do miss weed though. I've been thinking about it a lot.

[B]

I was quite the stoner and I just.

[A]

You gave up.

[B]

I gave up. It didn't. It never agreed with me. But I just thought it will eventually start agreeing with me.

[A]

Right.

[B]

It only got worse.

[A]

I think that's how I felt too.

[B]

Right. Like, you can. You can like convince your body that it likes it eventually.

[A]

But it made me creative at points, which I needed. Okay, but I think that was creative.

[B]

In a way where you revisited it and you were like, that's a terrible idea.

[A]

Well, I don't know because when Tucker came on, he was telling me like, that's what I used to tell myself. And it's not true. He's like, I used to tell myself that it made me more creative, that it made me this, that and third and like, it just wasn't true.

[B]

Wait, you know what else I'm therapist about?

[A]

What?

[B]

When you brought up Tucker, you were the original Sally girl. And no one more about it. You were the original Sally girl. And like Natalie Portman was so cute as Sally. I watched that video so many times.

[A]

Great.

[B]

She was amazing. But you were the number one Sally girl.

[A]

Tucker likes to forget.

[B]

Don't. I'm not letting anyone forget.

[A]

Tucker likes to forget. He ranked his favorite Sally's the other day.

[B]

Stop. Were you in there?

[A]

No.

[B]

Wait, what was the ranking?

[A]

I forget.

[B]

What was the ranking I forget.

[A]

But I wasn't in there. And I was like, oh, he's. He's just a Jedi. It must be.

[B]

He is very funny.

[A]

He's hysterical.

[B]

He is funny.

[A]

He's hysterical.

[B]

But I think about the fact that you were the original Sally girl.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

You started a big trend.

[A]

Thank you. You know what?

[B]

I was following in your footsteps.

[A]

I think about it a lot too. I. If I'd be lying if I say I did, if I said I didn't. And I. I do think about it.

[B]

I would think about it all the time.

[A]

I was like, damn. Like, I did that.

[B]

Where. Where was the concert? Where were you?

[A]

In Dallas. And it was right after my show in Dallas and I went to go see him and he was. He wanted to. He has a song called Slut Interlude and he wanted to bring me on and dance around me like one. One less lonely girl. And so I was like, oh, that sounds great.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But then he was like, no, actually, come on for Sally and like, jump around. And I was like, that feels anxiety inducing. So that's why I was on for so short, because I went on and I was like, oh, I can't do this anymore. And I jumped off because it was scary. No one had done it before.

[B]

I haven't been asked yet, so.

[A]

You haven't?

[B]

No.

[A]

You would make a great Sally.

[B]

Thank you. I think so too. The offer hasn't come in yet, but it'll. It'll come. Eventually.

[A]

It'll come.

[B]

He's done with tour. It's never happening again. By the way.

[A]

Going on tour again.

[B]

What if we were Sally's together?

[A]

Don't play with me. Should we.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Should we see if he's coming here? Yes. Just coming on. Our Lola's jumping around. It's low key, really scary. At least for me it was. But now I don't know if it is because people know what to do.

[B]

Let's get into the. Tell me what that.

[A]

So my boyfriend is leaving for college, nine hours away, and we are staying together and doing long distance. When I was saying goodbye and helping him pack up, I found a pack. I found a box of condoms in his bag. I'm not going with him. We've been together for a year and have done long distance before. Should I kill him or tread lightly?

[B]

Okay. Should I take it? I mean, you know, unfortunately. Unfortunately. I think I should take this one.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think I'm in a. First play, devil's advocate, and then I'm going to decimate his character.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So I think there's a world where he was bringing them with him so that when she comes to visit, he has condoms. Unless they don't use a condom, and in that case, run.

[A]

Right?

[B]

What I will say is, if there is any suspicion of cheating, leave, go. Like, that's enough. There's this. There's this, like, wonderful column called Dear Sugar. And when I was in a similar situation, my friend showed me this advice column. And there's this thing. There's this, like, kind of poem that she wrote where she's like, go because you want to. Because wanting to leave is enough.

[A]

One more time.

[B]

I thought you were so moved by.

[A]

It that you had picked up on it for a second. And then. Okay, go, because you want so in it.

[B]

She's like, go. Even though you love him, go. Even though he's your best friend and you're his. And then the end is go because you want to. Because wanting to leave is enough. Like, I don't think. I think that's enough proof for this person.

[A]

Right? Like, if you feel it, you're.

[B]

If you feel it, right? Like, don't second guess your intuition.

[A]

So leave, leave. I mean, yeah, if he's bringing a pack of condoms and you're. You're nine hours away, there's no reason.

[B]

For him to have that. You know what I prescribe?

[A]

What?

[B]

The Other Woman. Ah, it's a great movie.

[A]

I love you so much.

[B]

I love you.

[A]

You know, that's my favorite prescription to give.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Leslie Mann should have gotten an Oscar for that movie.

[A]

Yeah. Nicki Minaj tale. Nicki Minaj, too.

[B]

Put Nicki Minaj in more movies. Honestly, she's.

[A]

She killed her kid. She's LaGuardia Kid.

[B]

Is she?

[A]

Yeah, she went to LaGuardia.

[B]

All the great went to LaGuardia.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Who else went to LaGuardia?

[A]

Somber went to LaGuardia. Azealia Banks went to LaGuardia.

[B]

Wait, this is an insane, insane roster.

[A]

Who else? Timothy Chalamet went to laguardia, right? Did I make that up? I think I might have made that up. No, I didn't make that up.

[B]

No, I think he.

[A]

No, he went to LaGuardia.

[B]

Did he?

[A]

He went to LaGuardia. I'll fact check. Give me. Nolan, will you get me a list of people that went to LaGuardia? Because it is extensive.

[B]

But you didn't. Where did you go? You went to school in the city?

[A]

I went to school in the city. I went to the school called Calhoun Calhoun, and it was like we had no walls.

[B]

It sounds like an improv troupe.

[A]

I think it was an improv school.

[B]

Like it felt like everyone was improving.

[A]

No, it felt like they didn't really.

[B]

Know what they were doing.

[A]

No. Yes.

[B]

Okay, great. Did you call your teachers by their first names?

[A]

Yeah, of course.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Timothy Chalamet. Did go to LaGuardia. Michael Shea. Zazi Beats Awkwafina. Jennifer Aniston. Oh, lots of people. Ansel Elgore.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

Omar Epps. I don't know, I, I, I don't know. Al Pacino. Oh, wow, wow, wow. I was just diagnosed with oats. You know what I would prescribe actually leave? Get out by Jojo Yep.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

I was just diagnosed with OCD at the age of 37. It feels so strange that many of my patterns and behaviors had had a connection for the entirety of my life. So far, nothing's terribly wrong, but I just feel strange with this new information. What tips or tricks do you have post diagnosis of something like this?

[B]

You're diagnosed with ocd?

[A]

Yes, I, I, I knew though like since I was seven.

[B]

Yeah. I've never been diagnosed but I, I exhibit all the behaviors.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think if anything it should give you some peace that like you're like, okay, that makes sense. Maybe this person feels like frustrated that they didn't catch it sooner but like.

[B]

Yeah, but I think it's hard to catch information. Yeah. Take the information and like at least now you have context for it.

[A]

Yeah. And there's things to help you. I'm restarting exposure therapy soon.

[B]

What do you do in exposure therapy?

[A]

So like I have a hard time. I used to have a hard time adding songs to a playlist.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Sounds really silly. But I used to have to add it four times.

[B]

Delete it. Add it. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

And so like for example, during exposure therapy they would just have me add it and I'd have to sit there in the uncomfortability and like have it be added.

[B]

I would be so bad at that. No, it doesn't.

[A]

It was really hard because I was.

[B]

Like now I just knock on wood. But I feel like if I talk about it it's going to come back. But it's fine, honestly. Or am I going to give it to you?

[A]

I, that's what I'm scared about.

[B]

I just used to have to say something if I thought about a thought but then saying it once wasn't enough. So I had to do it three times. Three times? Three times. And it was just very consuming. Time consuming.

[A]

So like an exposure therapy, they'd have you think that bad thought and then not say that. And it's scary, but it's helpful. The most helpful therapy I've ever done in my entire life.

[B]

Amazing.

[A]

Ever in my entire life. It changed my life.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I stopped too soon, but I'm gonna restart it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm excited.

[B]

Great.

[A]

One of the participants in a throuple I'm a part of just got pregnant. Me and the other participant, if you will, are now torn on whether or not we want to find out who the father is. Wait, wait.

[B]

So two. Wait. Two boys? One.

[A]

One girl. I'm on the side of clarity while the other guy doesn't want to know and wants to just raise the kid all together. What do you think we should do?

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

I don't know. I don't know. Oh, I would watch Mamamma mia.

[B]

Oh, one or two?

[A]

One. Two.

[B]

That's both. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Think about the kid. What do you think the kid will want? What's best for the child.

[A]

I mean, I think when the kid comes out, you'll know who the father is.

[B]

True.

[A]

You will know.

[B]

That's true.

[A]

You will know.

[B]

Yeah. That's tough.

[A]

My boyfriend just got a pet snake and is obsessed with it. And I'm not even kidding. It's affecting my ability to finish with him in bed. Like, how do I suck up the ick? Because that doesn't even make any sense. Help. I think she's icked out that her boyfriend got a snake. Oh, I would think. That is so sweet.

[B]

I would find it. So, like, I'm like, if you have a pet rat. Absolutely.

[A]

What?

[B]

A rat. I love a weird animal.

[A]

Okay. Okay.

[B]

I mean, I had a pet squirrel for a while.

[A]

I didn't know you could domesticate those.

[B]

You can't. It was a biter. Banjo.

[A]

Okay. What was this when you grew up?

[B]

It was not as long ago as I wish it was.

[A]

It was four years ago. And how did you have Banjo?

[B]

Banjo was a sugar glider. Banjo. And Turbo was a brother and sister.

[A]

And where did you find Banjo and Turbo?

[B]

Nashville.

[A]

Like, in the wild?

[B]

No, no, no, no. They were. They were pets, but you can't really domesticate them. They're nocturnal. I'm just the wrong person for this because I love weird animals.

[A]

Right?

[B]

But I do think that I am, like, the person who has, like, the longest ick list ever. But I do think if you actually like someone, don't really apply.

[A]

I. You've told me that before, and I think you're correct.

[B]

Let yourself be surprised, because sometimes an ick is just that you're over the.

[A]

Person and, like, you're looking for any reason.

[B]

Because I think if you were madly in love with someone and they got.

[A]

A snake, you'd be like, oh, they got a snake.

[B]

That's so endearing.

[A]

I think it's sweet. I love when, like, boys get nerdy about that stuff.

[B]

I know. What do we prescribe? Is there, like, a Snakes on a Plane? That's. That movie gave me nightmares.

[A]

I've never seen it, but I describe it. Is it good?

[B]

I couldn't fly for so long. There's a scene where a snake comes up from the toilet.

[A]

What?

[B]

And I literally couldn't use the bathroom on a plane for the longest time because I was like, the snake's gonna come and bite me.

[A]

Sorry. Now that we're talking about movies again, you need to watch Scandal. And I know that it's a TV show. I'm just, like, thinking about how you haven't seen it. And it is so mind blowing to me. Like, do you like soap operas?

[B]

I don't know if I've really watched. I mean, I watched Grey's Anatomy.

[A]

You would love Scandal. Oh, my God, it's the best. It's made by the same person. I prompt, do you like.

[B]

Sorry.

[A]

And you know what? Dare I say Scandal is better than Grace Anatomy?

[B]

Well, careful.

[A]

No, careful. I'm telling you, it's better. It changed.

[B]

Is there a musical episode of Scandal? Because there is in Grey's Anatomy.

[A]

No, there's not. But the music, the Needle Drops and Scandal are all, like, jazz songs. Oh, no. And they're so good.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[A]

Like, there's one scene where they're like, you know. Okay. Do you know, like, the premise of the show? It's like the President and Olivia are, like, in love, right? Like, you know that they're in love.

[B]

Or they're having just, like, a sexual.

[A]

Like, a torrid affair.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And there's a scene that's so heated.

[B]

Did you learn Torrid Affair from Taylor Swift?

[A]

Yeah, I did. I did.

[B]

Incredible.

[A]

There's a scene where, like, he's like. Like, watch me earn you. Like, watch me choose you. And what's the song playing in the background of it? It's like. I think it's Sam Cooks. Nothing can change this. Love, Nolan. Just like, my nipples are hard. Like, it. Seriously, like, mine, too. Kind of like it. And they played the most beautiful rendition of Bridge Over Troubled Water the other day. No, it's amazing.

[B]

Okay. Okay.

[A]

It's amazing.

[B]

You love a needle drop. You love. You love more than anything.

[A]

And I'll tell you my favorites right now if you really like. I Want to Know Girl Season 1, Episode 3, Robin dancing on My Own.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah. What about. Okay. There's a really good Fiona Apple song, Valentine. And girls, when they're all dancing, you.

[A]

Know, I've never really listened to Fiona Apple. And I know I need to. I know I need to.

[B]

We have. It's okay.

[A]

I know. I know I need to. I know. She's, like, one of the greatest of all time.

[B]

She is. And I think especially, like, the girls that you love now are all influenced by people.

[A]

I'm going to.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you have a favorite needle drop?

[B]

No. Should I? No, I can't. I don't. I mean, no, I don't.

[A]

You never watch Mr. Robot, right?

[B]

No. You've been telling me.

[A]

There's a scene in Mr. Robot season in season three. I think it's season three, episode seven. And they have this song called In Time by Robbie Rob. And one of my favorite needle drops I've ever heard in my life. Also, Crowded Places by Banks and Girls was amazing.

[B]

Oh, wait, isn't two one, two in the bling Ring?

[A]

Yeah. Iconic, iconic, iconic.

[B]

Also, this isn't a needle drop, but there's in the movie the Skeleton Twins. Have you seen this?

[A]

No.

[B]

Bill Hader and Kristen Wake, my two favorite people in the whole world.

[A]

Wait, I've heard of this movie. What is it about?

[B]

We'll love it. They're twins, and he tries to take his own life and then moves back in with her. And it's like when she still lives in their hometown. And, like, he revisits this teacher that he had an affair with when he was a student. And it's, like, devastating and so funny, and they're just so electric in it.

[A]

I love when comedians play drama.

[B]

Oh, my gosh. It's. It's so good. They're both such great actors. And there's a scene where they sing. They fuck. What is the song? Oh, Nancy, we're crazy. Oh, my God. We can build this. Whatever.

[A]

We can build this world together. Nothing's gonna stop us.

[B]

I think it is that. Okay, whatever. It's really, really good. And that's one of my favorite musical numbers in a movie of all time.

[A]

Also, what's the one in Grey's Anatomy when Katherine Heigl is running after Danny?

[B]

Is it how to Save a Life?

[A]

Yeah. No, it's chasing cars.

[B]

Those to me. Feel like the same song.

[A]

Yeah, for sure.

[B]

Are they both the Fray?

[A]

No ones.

[B]

Nolan, you would know this.

[A]

Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol. Snow Patrol and How to save a life is the Fray. Yeah. And then I'm trying to think of, like, other. Like, I'm just like, a. For a good needle drop. Oh, the finale of. Have you ever seen the Hills?

[B]

No.

[A]

They do an acoustic version of Unwritten in the finale of the Hills. It's amazing.

[B]

Oh, the OC when they play the image in Heap song.

[A]

Oh, what the. Yeah. Hide and Seek. I've never seen those. See, but I know that scene.

[B]

Wait, is it the Imogen Heap song or. No, no, they play Hallelujah.

[A]

No. And they do the image.

[B]

They do both.

[A]

You were right.

[B]

So good.

[A]

I love Hallelujah versions. My boyfriend.

[B]

I love Hallelujah.

[A]

My boyfriend of over a year is Slash. Was kind of addicted to weed. He recently claimed to quit for me, but one of our mutuals told me he smokes a lot behind my back. What do I do?

[B]

The problem. Oh, hi, Emily. The problem is not the weed smoking. The problem is the lying.

[A]

Jinx.

[B]

Yeah, jinx.

[A]

I agree. And also, like, quitting for someone. I've never. That doesn't. Like, when I quit.

[B]

That's not.

[A]

Quit for myself.

[B]

You can't quit for someone else. Yeah. You resent them, and then it's too much pressure. You have to choose for yourself. So if he quit for you, that's.

[A]

Like, he didn't really want to really quit either.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Have you ever seen the show Dope Sick?

[B]

Yes. With Caitlin, who you had on.

[A]

Who I love changed my life.

[B]

It's. That show is so upsetting.

[A]

So upsetting.

[B]

Have you seen Birdman?

[A]

No. Is that the one that was, like, shot one shot or something?

[B]

Oh, my God, it's so good.

[A]

Is he in it?

[B]

Yes, he's. He's the Birdman. Got it. Birdman.

[A]

I'll give it a watch.

[B]

Also in the same. This is not to compare opioids and weed, but warning, this drug may kill you.

[A]

Oh, I've never seen that. What's that about?

[B]

So sad. It's about the opioid epidemic in the US Just to bring the mood down a little bit. But it's really good.

[A]

Is it a documentary or a movie?

[B]

Documentary.

[A]

Okay. Oh, interesting. I'm gonna watch it.

[B]

Yeah, watch it.

[A]

I used to watch, like, so many documentaries about that. It was like a weird.

[B]

I was going through a weird time.

[A]

I have this almost strange supernatural ability that almost every single curb, wet floor, or slushy Is what. I don't understand this one. And it's giving me ocd, and I can't.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

She's saying that, like, she trips on everything.

[B]

So do I.

[A]

Like, wait, I think.

[B]

What's the problem?

[A]

Yeah. That is what she's saying. That is what she's saying. Yeah. She's like, how do I deal with embarrassment? Not the fact. The problem is.

[B]

Oh, I have a good one for this.

[A]

Okay. Should I finish reading it?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Just to give her the floor.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I have this almost strange supernatural ability that almost every single curb, wet, floor, slushy is either being tripped or. Or on or tripped into. Like, I am the clumsiest in America. It has nothing to do with anything. Eyesight, contacts, mentality, mentally. Sorry. And I just have to do with me having zero spatial awareness. It ruined graduation, it's ruining dates, and everybody finds it funny, but, like, I'm so sick of it. I might be hopeless, but please help.

[B]

Okay. This is not a real problem.

[A]

Right?

[B]

It's not a real problem. Everyone trips all the time. It is embarrassing to trip when you're not with friends because.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You know, people saw and you. But here's. This is what I do. If I trip. I just look at the nearest person and I say, are you okay?

[A]

Do you really do that? You. And are they like, what?

[B]

It just confuses them.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then it, like, gets the attention off you. If you trip, just look at the person next to you. Are you okay?

[A]

Are you the type of person where if someone's arguing with you and they say something really mean, do you go, what did you say? So they have to repeat what they've said.

[B]

That's a really good tactic.

[A]

No, I've never. I just feel like you would be emotionally intelligent enough to do that.

[B]

I. I do a version of that on set sometimes. Like, if someone asked me to do a pose that I don't want to do, I'm totally outing myself. But no one that I work with is probably gonna listen to this. I think it's okay. Where if they're like, can you do this pose? I go, I don't understand. Can you show me? And then they try to do it, and they're like, never mind.

[A]

Because it's weird.

[B]

Because it's weird, right? Yeah.

[A]

Kaya, what did we learn today?

[B]

Oh, my God, it happened so fast.

[A]

This was amazing.

[B]

It was so fun.

[A]

Dare I say, one of the best.

[B]

Stop.

[A]

So good. Nolan.

[B]

You have to say that, Nolan.

[A]

I don't.

[B]

I don't have to. Have you been nervous? In front of anyone?

[A]

Yeah. Who have you been nervous in front of? Betty Blanco. Because I'm a huge fan.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Charlie. Yeah, I was nervous in front of Charlie. Ed Sheeran.

[B]

Ed Sheeran's my favorite.

[A]

Yeah. I love Ed Sheeran. I just love him. He's amazing. Well, that was.

[B]

That episode is so funny.

[A]

That was the first house call we ever made. That was, like, the first of first. When we did Tate McCrae for the first time. Like that. We had done two episodes with Friends. Oh, yeah. I was nervous for that.

[B]

Bricks and Glenn Powell.

[A]

I was nervous for Glenn, even though I love Glenn. But I was. I was nervous because he was the first act. I think it was the first actor we had on. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so I was nervous. Well, besides Renee. But, like, when I was promoting music, he was promoting a movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So what did we learn today?

[B]

I learned that your husband's gonna love you so much.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

He's not gonna love you as much as I love you, but he's out there. There's time for you to find your husband. That's what I learned. I learned that I have to watch Scandal.

[A]

You need to watch Scandal. And I learned that I have to watch Birdman, and I also have to watch Blonde.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And I have to read the Shards, please, which I already knew I was going to read. But, like, you've sold it on me if it.

[B]

I wouldn't recommend you a book that I didn't think you'd like, because I don't need you to hate reading any more than you already do. But I think you'll love it.

[A]

Have you ever read A Little Life?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Is it as sad as people say it is?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay, you.

[B]

You're reading that book and you go, can't get things can't get worse.

[A]

That's what everyone says.

[B]

And then they do. And there was. I was sitting at the pool the other day, and the woman next to me was reading it, and she was about halfway through, and I literally looked at her, and I go, you have no idea what's coming for you. She was like, la, la, la. And then I was just like, you're about to get wrecked, Will.

[A]

Just read it. Right?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Oh, where's Will? We should invite him tonight.

[A]

We should invite him to double date. That's Double date.

[B]

Gorgeous. Well, what did you learn?

[A]

Oh, you know what? You just might be my favorite guest ever.

[B]

Don't say that to me.

[A]

What did I learn? I learned.

[B]

I'm glad I was so impactful.

[A]

No, I learned I learned. No, there was something you said that really.

[B]

That just.

[A]

Oh. Oh. I learned that reading is a muscle.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And that you have to practice. You're not just good at reading.

[B]

And date your friends. Date your friends if you can.

[A]

And. Yeah. And I love you.

[B]

And I'm not mad at you.

[A]

And you're not mad at me. And I'm not mad at you.

[B]

Thank you so much. I was waiting for that. Thank you.

[A]

I love you.

[B]

I love you.

[A]

Do you want to give a little bye.

[B]

Where do I look? There. Where?

[A]

Right there.

[B]

Where? Oh. Bye.