“I’M A FARMER”

Summary

Detailed Summary of Therapy Gecko Podcast Episode: “I’M A FARMER”

Released on June 18, 2025 by iHeartPodcasts

In the episode titled “I’M A FARMER” from Therapy Gecko, host Lyle engages in an in-depth and personable conversation with Weston, a fifth-generation farmer balancing his agricultural responsibilities with his studies in mechanical engineering. This episode provides listeners with a rich glimpse into the life of modern farming, familial legacies, and the unique challenges faced by those who choose to continue their ancestral trades.

---

Introduction and Caller Connection (02:09 - 02:34)

The episode begins with Lyle greeting Weston, who introduces himself and begins sharing a recent mishap on the farm.

Weston:

“Well, I live on a farm and I was just spraying the field and then I ran over a log that was hidden in the weeds and it went through my tire.” (02:21)

---

Farming Background and Legacy (03:00 - 04:33)

Weston delves into his family's long-standing farming heritage, highlighting the transformation of their land from forested areas to productive farmland.

Weston:

“I'm a fifth generational farmer.” (03:11)

He explains how his grandparents moved to the current location, clearing trees to establish farming operations.

---

Cultivating Cotton: Processes and Market (04:33 - 05:50)

Weston provides a detailed overview of cotton farming, from planting to harvesting and processing.

Weston:

“We grow cotton. We have about 10 tractors and then two big cotton harvesters... trucks will come and pick it up and take it to what they call it a gin.” (04:33)

Lyle questions the modern demand for cotton, to which Weston admits limited consumer knowledge but emphasizes the crop's profitability in their dry climate.

Weston:

“Out here it's really dry. It's like a desert. So cotton is actually the most profitable crop we can grow.” (05:28)

---

Economic Dynamics of Farming (15:13 - 16:00)

The conversation shifts to the financial aspects of farming, where Weston explains the substantial revenues and high expenses involved in cotton farming.

Weston:

“If an average person makes a hundred thousand dollars a year, but if they're farming, you would make like maybe $3 million a year, but you would have $2.9 million in expenses.” (15:13)

Lyle expresses concern over the narrow profit margins, prompting Weston to discuss the inherent risks and protective measures like crop insurance.

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Anecdotes and Farm Life (07:01 - 10:44)

Weston shares entertaining stories from his farm life, including his and his friends' experiments with tannerite to create explosive displays.

Weston:

“We stack a bunch of fridges, old fridges on each other and put like, 40 pounds of this stuff under there... and it just blows up into a mushroom cloud.” (07:30)

He also discusses his laid-back relationship with local law enforcement, allowing him to engage in reckless driving without repercussions.

Weston:

“When are you gonna catch me? I'm waiting for it.” (10:01)

---

Balancing Education and Farming (17:03 - 18:48)

Weston talks about his current role as a farm manager on a friend's ranch while pursuing a mechanical engineering degree. He describes the cultural shift from a small high school to a large college environment.

Weston:

“I just got through my freshman year of college and that first semester was very difficult for me because... it was like not the type of school I was used to.” (17:44 - 18:13)

He highlights his ability to make friends through shared interests like sports and religion, mitigating the initial isolation.

---

Community and Relationships (36:06 - 43:37)

Weston emphasizes the importance of family and community, describing his close-knit relationships with cousins and grandparents. He shares stories that illustrate the strong support system that underpins his life.

Weston:

“I've been told by a bunch of my dad's college friends that he's the best guy you could ever have as a dad.” (36:06)

He also discusses his aspirations to return to farm life post-graduation, valuing hands-on work over sedentary careers.

---

Interactions with Wildlife and Safety (28:00 - 31:07)

Weston recounts encounters with wildlife on the farm, including handling rattlesnakes and wild dogs, demonstrating his resilience and familiarity with farm life hazards.

Weston:

“I've killed, like, a rabbit and ate it. A rattlesnake... it's like eating any other food.” (54:08)

He shares his conflicting feelings about heights, enjoying the physical act of climbing but fearing the height itself.

---

Future Aspirations and Crop Diversification (24:21 - 25:04)

When prompted about alternative crops, Weston expresses interest in growing alfalfa or corn, citing corn's robustness and versatility.

Weston:

“Either alfalfa or corn. That would be my answer because corn is super tall... you just grow.” (24:29 - 25:04)

He contrasts sweet corn with field corn, explaining their different uses and growth patterns.

---

Closing Remarks and Reflections (58:35 - 58:51)

Towards the end of the conversation, Lyle conveys heartfelt sentiments, wishing Weston well and expressing admiration for his character and lifestyle.

Lyle:

“Weston, you're a blessed man. You have a close family. You have a strong idea of what you want to do with your life.” (42:22)

Weston:

“I love living my life, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.” (58:46)

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Weston:

“I'm a fifth generational farmer.” (03:11)

• Weston:

“Cotton is actually the most profitable crop we can grow.” (05:28)

• Weston:

“We almost have a privilege... I'm super close to my grandparents.” (09:00)

• Lyle:

“Weston, you're a blessed man. You have a close family. You have a strong idea of what you want to do with your life.” (42:22)

• Weston:

“I love living my life, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.” (58:46)

---

Conclusion

The “I’M A FARMER” episode of Therapy Gecko offers a heartfelt and informative look into the life of a dedicated farmer balancing tradition with modern aspirations. Through Weston's engaging storytelling and candid reflections, listeners gain valuable insights into the complexities of farming, the importance of family, and the pursuit of personal and professional goals amidst challenging circumstances.

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Note: Advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections from the transcript have been excluded to focus solely on the meaningful interactions and discussions.

Transcript

[Lyle]

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[Lyle]

Full disclosures at public.com disclosures Mr. Gecko, what's up man? What's your name?

[Weston]

My name is Weston.

[Lyle]

Weston, what's going on, Weston? How's life?

[Weston]

Well, I live on a farm and I was just spraying the field and then I ran over a a log that was hidden in the weeds and it went through my tire.

[Lyle]

Oh no. Is that bad? Right?

[Weston]

So now I'm here. Yeah, that's really bad. That means I need a new tire.

[Lyle]

How is working on a farm?

[Weston]

Oh, it's awesome. I love it. It's. I would, I would not want to live any other way. I'm actually in college right now and I'm studying mechanical engineering. But I really just want to end up back on the farm.

[Lyle]

Cool, man. Is this like your parents farm or whose farm is this?

[Weston]

Yes, sir. So. So I'm a fifth generational farmer.

[Lyle]

Oh yeah. So when was the land that you're farming on first, like cultivated or whatever?

[Weston]

So both of my grandparents grew up in a town about an hour away from us and then both of them moved out to where I live now. And then my parents met each other, you know, that kind of stuff. But so they actually. It was all trees, like a forest. And we cleared it out with big machines and made it, turned it into farmland.

[Lyle]

Whoa. What do you grow?

[Weston]

Yes, sir. So we grow cotton. So we have about 10 tractors and then two big cotton harvesters and they. Once the cotton is grown and it's all white, we run these big machines over it and it'll, it'll tick off the white fluff off of the, the little stalk and then it turns it into this massive bale of cotton. And then we stack those bales and sets of four and then trucks will come and pick it up and take it to what they call it a gin. And the gin will divide the fibers and the seed and then that's how you get your shirts and all that kind of stuff.

[Lyle]

Yeah. I was about to ask what, what, what are they, what are they using cotton for these days? I feel like shirts are made out of all kinds of stuff now.

[Weston]

Yeah, a lot of China stuff, but man, I, I really couldn't tell you. Probably cotton ball maybe.

[Lyle]

Do they, do we need, do we use a lot of cotton balls these days?

[Weston]

I've used probably three in the past couple years. Three cotton balls.

[Lyle]

Here's the thing, man, I'm just. Look, I'm no farmer, but I'm just saying like I feel like you could be doing so much more profitable crops out there, like cotton. That sounds, that's a very like 1700s, 1800s ass crop. You know what I'm saying?

[Weston]

Yeah, yeah. I mean out here it's really dry. It's like a desert. So cotton is actually the most profitable crop we can grow.

[Lyle]

Get the out of here. Really?

[Weston]

Which is crazy. Yeah, because like my dad loves to plant corn because like the wind will knock it over and the next day it's standing up again like it's it's, like, indestructible, but we don't have the water for it, so we have to do cotton. Isn't that. Isn't that kind of weird?

[Lyle]

I'm still like, I. I guess, yeah. I mean, shirts. But, like, what. What else? Like, what. Who's buying all this? Like, who's the cotton ball company buying all the cotton?

[Weston]

I have no idea. Somebody is. Somebody's buying our cotton. So we keep going. But, I mean, it's a. It's a really, really good industry. And the thing about it is it's really hard for somebody who didn't grow up. Grow up on a farm to start farming. But, like, in my shoes, I'm almost 20 years old, and I've had 19 years of teaching and learning and all this stuff, so, like, I'm so far ahead of somebody who would just, like, want to start coming from the city. You say so, and I just. I really. I really do enjoy it. Just, like, the lifestyle. Like, I really want to have a family, grow up on a farm. You get that country lifestyle, which there's nothing wrong with, like, growing up in a city. But, you know, like, last weekend my. Me and my friends got together and. Have you ever heard of tannerite?

[Lyle]

No. What is tannerite?

[Weston]

So it's like a. It's like these little white. White bead or like bbs and then powder, and you mix it together and you shoot it with a gun and it explodes. So we stack a bunch of fridges, old fridges on each other and put like, 40 pounds of this stuff under there, and we get like, half a mile away and we shoot it, and it just blows up into a mushroom cloud. It's. It's the best thing ever.

[Lyle]

That's so awesome. I love the way you said what you said, by the. I love what you said, by the way, where you were like, you know, there's nothing wrong with living in the city because, like. Because people who live in cities, we think we're so much better than everyone else. And we say things and we say things like, well, there's nothing wrong with wanting to, you know, live in. In the country or the suburbs, but in this, like, sl. You know what I mean? It's like a framing of, like, the way you're even saying it implies that there is something wrong, you know, but you're flipping it on its head. You know what I mean? You're like. Like, you see. You see the city people the way the city people see the country people. It's like, it's like, what the fuck kind of life is that? You know, living in a big fucking city. You can't. You can't. If you try to blow up fridges in the middle of Manhattan, you would be sent to Guantanamo Bay.

[Weston]

Yeah, I would be in a lot of trouble. Yes, but I can't. But I can do that here.

[Lyle]

You can do that there. What did it look like legally?

[Weston]

Actually, I don't know how legal it is, but.

[Lyle]

Yeah, but there's. Who gives a shit? No, but there's no cops out there. You can break any laws you want. I think so.

[Weston]

Funny thing is, I know all the cops. Isn't that awesome? So we have. We have Carl, Kenneth, Chase, like, all of them. Sheriff Keith, like, I keep. So. So I have.

[Lyle]

Wait, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Did you say. Did you say Sheriff Pete Keith?

[Weston]

Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

You. You guys have a sheriff?

[Weston]

Absolutely.

[Lyle]

Dude. God damn, though.

[Weston]

The funny part. The funny part. So I live in Texas, near Midland, which is like the oil filled city of Texas. And so there's a bunch of oil filled traffic. So all the cops don't give a about us. They're like, oh, you're local. You do whatever you want. You want to drive 120 down a county road? Go for it. We're gonna pull over this guy for going five miles over the speed limit because he's an oil field worker. So we almost have, like, privilege, if that makes sense.

[Lyle]

Yeah, that definitely makes sense. Sorry, sorry. I was just making sure that my fucking microphone stories. Okay, I think it does. I think it does. All right, cool. So you know all of the cops by first. Do you go on, like, joy rides with them and shit? Like, do they let you get away with shit?

[Weston]

Oh, absolutely, Absolutely. So, like, I have this one. Carl is my favorite cop, and I keep telling him, I'm like, carl, man, when are you gonna. When are you gonna catch me? I'm waiting for it. And then he. He's like, oh, I'll get you one day. And he still hasn't got me. But like, one of my close friends, his. His dad, the cop, he pulled me over and I. I just hop out and I walk over to his window. I'm like, what's up, man? How you doing? He's like, oh, good. How have you been? How's school going? I'm like, oh, it's going good, you know? And then I walk away. No ticket. I was speeding like 30 miles over the limit.

[Lyle]

Oh, boy.

[Weston]

Isn't that awesome?

[Lyle]

Well, what kind of laws is it? What kind of laws are you breaking out here?

[Weston]

Oh, none that are important. All right, I know, I know you're not the biggest fan of a drive in.

[Lyle]

I would know. I was. That's how I was about it. Well, yeah, I don't like. I think going 30 miles over the speed limit is bad. I actively hate that you're doing that. But.

[Weston]

Right.

[Lyle]

I have no. But I have, I have no jurisdiction upon you other than judgment.

[Weston]

Yeah, pretty much.

[Lyle]

Well, okay, let me ask you this. So when you graduate from school, you said you're in school, right?

[Weston]

Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

What, and you're gonna. Are you gonna go back to work at your parents farm or are you gonna work on your own farm?

[Weston]

So I'm actually working for my best friend's dad right now on his farm slash ranch. So he, my best friend's dad works for like this billionaire and he owns all this land and like we ranch on it. We do like a feed yard, like a bunch of cattle. We feed them every day and tins and all this stuff. And then we'll let them out into the pasture and the forest and the ranch and stuff. And then he also has some farmland. So I am like the farm manager, if you had to put a title on it. And that's what I've been doing out here, which is great learning experience. But after college I really, I don't know because I. I kind of wanted to do engineering for a job, but I've lived all my life. Whenever I work, I get like my hands dirty. I have to be doing something. I can't. I don't think I could sit like how you do. Like you sit behind a screen and talk to people, which talking to people makes it so much better. But I would just be doing like straight book work and I don't think I could do that.

[Lyle]

Yeah, you want to be making stuff and building things and working with your hands, right?

[Weston]

Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I like that, man. I like that. And also you can pick a better crop. Cuz I, I don't know why you guys are stuck in the 1800s. Pick, you know, making cotton, doing cotton.

[Weston]

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know why we are either but.

[Lyle]

And, and then you, I assume you have a bunch of boys, you have a bunch of homies, you have a bun, you have a. Oh God, what's the name of that movie? What's the, what's the movie or the TV show where they jump a car over a ditch and it freezes and there's a voiceover?

[Weston]

I couldn't tell you.

[Lyle]

Hold on Chat. What is the name of this movie I'm talking about? No, it's not Jackass. Hold on. Oh, the Duke of Hazard. Okay, you got your little Duke of Hazard. You got your little Duke of Hazzard group. Okay, and what are they? What do they all do? What are they all doing? What's their deal?

[Weston]

Yeah, so we're all working on farms, and we're all just messing around, you know, So I know it's gonna disappoint you, but three of my friends are planting cotton right now. And then one of my friends is stacking silage. So you. You grow, like, this really tall grass, and then you cut it and push it in a big pile, and then you put a tarp over it, and then you let it, like, ferment, almost like beer or wine, like ferments. And then you take the tarp off and feed it to animals. And it's super, super nutritious and easy to digest.

[Lyle]

Why would that disappoint me? Because it's more cotton.

[Weston]

Yeah, more cotton.

[Lyle]

I don't. Cotton doesn't necessarily disappoint me, I guess. I don't know. I mean, it seems you guys do okay with cotton.

[Weston]

We're doing great. Yeah. And you know what's. What's also fun about farming is you get to mess with big money.

[Lyle]

How so?

[Weston]

For example, if the average person makes. Or if a stand. If an. If a person makes a hundred thousand dollars a year, but if they're farming, you would make, like, maybe $3 million a year, but you would have $2.9 million in expenses.

[Lyle]

Right?

[Weston]

So you profit a hundred grand.

[Lyle]

Right.

[Weston]

But you just get to play with more money. Isn't that so much fun?

[Lyle]

Yeah, well, that. That makes a lot of sense to me, but that's also kind of spooky to me, right? Because aren't you, like, you. You. Because you're investing all of this money, but aren't you, like, at the whim of so many things like natural disasters or lack of whatever? Like, are you. Is there a lot of risk involved in farming?

[Weston]

Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Absolutely. So. So you have, like, tornadoes, and then hail is a big problem. So whenever your crop is really, really small, wind, high winds can even just, like, burn the leaves off because it gets so hot out here. And then you can have hail just, like, pound it to a pulp. But we have a. It's called crop insurance. So if. If a natural disaster occurs, this company will come out, take a look. They're like, yeah, that looks pretty. Pretty bad. And then they'll give you money. So we kind of have a safety blanket. But not all the time like your, your cotton, your cotton harvester depicts your cotton could catch on fire and there goes $2 million. Like nothing.

[Lyle]

What do you do when you're not farming?

[Weston]

So it's kind of seasonal. So we're just getting over planting season and planting season and harvest season is the biggest season. But in, in the downtime, go on vacation, go play like mess around with friends. I don't know, you're kind of, you're kind of always farming, right, if that makes sense. Because you have all of this equipment and land at your disposal.

[Lyle]

How has it been managing both farming and going to school?

[Weston]

So during school I have a part time job on a farm and it's been good school. School was a very drastic change for me because I grew up so my high school, I graduated with 20 kids and then I went to college and my first class I had 200 people in one room. And that was like a crazy culture shock for me.

[Lyle]

Yeah, okay, so you had 20 kids in the whole grade and then you went from 200 kids in one class. That's crazy.

[Weston]

Exactly. Oh yeah, it was, it was like nothing I've ever seen. But. But yeah, that first. So I just got through my freshman year of college and that first semester was very difficult for me because. Because that is, it was like not the type of school I was used to. I was used to very personal connections. And in college you don't get that really at all.

[Lyle]

Did you make any friends in college?

[Weston]

Yeah, so luckily I'm a very, I don't know, I thought I have a very easy time making friends, which is very, very fortunate. And so I made a bunch of friends through like my religion. Like we have like a, like a group or what do you call it? Like a. Not a church, but I guess a hall. So I made a bunch of friends through there. I made a couple friends through my major and then I made more friends playing pickleball and tennis and like racquetball, ping pong, anything with a racket I'm not too shabby at. Hmm, yes, sir.

[Lyle]

Do you work with a lot of animals or just crops?

[Weston]

So that's, that's the funny thing is every time I bring up, I grew up on a farm, the first question is always, what kind of animals do you have? And I'm like, we don't have any animals. We have cotton. But the animals I messed with on this ranch is a whole bunch of cows. That's their Main passion, if you will. And then they also have a couple sheep and a couple goats because I don't know why.

[Lyle]

Do you feel like people, like, have a lot of misconceptions about you when they hear that you grew up on a farm?

[Weston]

I can understand how that would be a like us. Not really as much as you would think is how I would put that. Because everybody I've dealt with, they've just always been super fascinated by the fact that I grew up on a farm. But I've never, I've never ran into anything crazy like a movie would portray, I guess, if you say that. But a really cool part about working on a farm is I have two South African co workers and they're like the best people I've ever met. They're awesome.

[Lyle]

What do you like about it?

[Weston]

And they. Oh, I love them because they like, their accent is awesome. I find stuff that they like normal stuff that they say really funny. And then they find stuff that I say super funny. And then they're just so, they're so joyful because they've told me, like a lot of bad things that have happened in South Africa. They're getting kind of like, the government is kind of chasing them out in a way. But like, they'll invite me over. They're teaching me South African words because they speak English in a language called Africante. And then they'll make like all kinds of jerky and dried sausage and all this like, interesting flavors that I've never had before because I've never been out of the United States before. So like, all this new culture coming to me is just like, awesome.

[Lyle]

Do you, oh, what, what words do you say that they find funny?

[Weston]

Okie dokie. They, they, they hysterically lose it every time.

[Lyle]

That's super fun.

[Weston]

Oh, it's awesome. I'll just be like, okie dokie, I'll see you later. And if they go, okie dokie. Oh, it's awesome. Do you have those face stuff?

[Lyle]

Go ahead. Yeah, you go ahead.

[Weston]

They'll say stuff like lakasha or a bride. And I'm like, what does that even mean? It's just awesome.

[Lyle]

Do you have places outside of the US that you want to go to?

[Weston]

I would love to go to Canada and Germany.

[Lyle]

Why? What's going on in Germany?

[Weston]

Germany they have awesome. So like I, I use this in a scholarship interview. So like, they have some of the best ski slopes because I love snow skiing. And then anything made in Germany, like cars, tools, some of our explosives, we buy anything made in Germany just always has this, like, amazing quality. And I would just love to see, like, everything is made. Made in Germany is in. Everything in Germany is made in Germany. I just love to see, like, what that beholds, if that makes sense.

[Lyle]

And then what about Canada?

[Weston]

I would also want to go skiing there. And I like the cold, which is weird because I'm from Texas. Like, it's 115 degrees right now.

[Lyle]

So if you could. Yeah, if you could get. If you could get into any new crop, right? Like, you. Let's say you could snap your fingers and the land. And the land were fertile for whatever you wanted it to be fertile for, what would you grow?

[Weston]

Never thought about this. So it's fertile, and I'm assuming we got some water.

[Lyle]

Whatever. Whatever you. Whatever you need.

[Weston]

Whatever it takes. Either alfalfa or corn. That would be my answer. Because corn. Corn is super tall. And it's like. It's like building a wall, but you don't even have to build it. You just grow.

[Lyle]

It's like you're growing a wall.

[Weston]

It's so, like, dense. Yeah, you're growing a wall. What could be better than that? And it's so. It's so dense. And then. So there's a difference between, like, the corn you eat at a restaurant and the corn that they put into cans. So the corn you eat at a restaurant, it's called sweet corn. And whenever you grow sweet corn, it's only about 4ft tall at its peak, but whenever you grow, it's called field corn. Like, the corn they put in a can with flavoring, that stuff can get up to, like, 10ft tall, and you just get lost in it. And then you can do so many things with corn. You can grind it up like cornmeal. You can shred it, turn it into silage for the animals. You can bail it into bales. You can just send it off, sell it as corn. Oh, there's a. There's a badger walking through this pecan orchard right now.

[Lyle]

You're in a pecan orchard?

[Weston]

That's a. That's a big orchard. I mean, a big. Oh, my gosh.

[Lyle]

Can I send you a picture of the badger?

[Weston]

There's two of them.

[Lyle]

Yeah, sure. You can send me a picture of the badger.

[Weston]

Oh, I have an iPhone. I don't think it takes a picture that far away for reference. It's like the size. Hmm. Of a car tire.

[Lyle]

You see? Okay. A badger the size of a car tire.

[Weston]

Yeah. This thing's huge.

[Lyle]

Wait, take a picture of that fucking badger. Send it to me. I want to see this.

[Weston]

I don't. Okay, let me try.

[Lyle]

All right, hold on. When you said the badge of the. There's no way that that badger is the size of a car tire. That's like a.

[Weston]

My camera's too shitty.

[Lyle]

Okay. This is gonna come out looking like one of those fake pictures of bigfoot.

[Weston]

Yep, yep. Let me drive. Hold on. It might be a little loud.

[Lyle]

Are you in your. Are you in a car right now?

[Weston]

In my truck, yes, sir.

[Lyle]

Okay. Normally, I try not normally. I try not to talk to people while they're driving, but I feel like being in a truck is. I feel like this is part of your aura.

[Weston]

It's appropriate. Yeah, I have this cool switch on it. It can open and close my exhaust to make it loud or quiet.

[Lyle]

Yeah. What? Do you ever make it loud on purpose?

[Weston]

Absolutely. It's loud right now.

[Lyle]

So you're chasing after the.

[Weston]

Oh. Oh, It's a mom badger. And there's, like, four babies following it.

[Lyle]

Oh, my God.

[Weston]

Sorry. I'm. I'm hunting on your live stream. I don't mean to do this.

[Lyle]

No, but you're not gonna. You're not gonna kill them, are you?

[Weston]

No, sir.

[Lyle]

Okay, good. They seem. They seem nice.

[Weston]

They are very nice. They're very. You could describe it as cute.

[Lyle]

Do you see it? Do you see a lot of these animals, like, on the. On your. On your farm?

[Weston]

Yeah. So we have all kinds of animals. We have deer, rabbit, snakes. All kinds of snakes. Badgers, raccoons, bobcats, coyotes, everything you ever gotten.

[Lyle]

Attack.

[Weston]

Okay. I sent it to you.

[Lyle]

Okay. All right, let me see.

[Weston]

So there's a. There's a big blob, and then there's four little blobs behind it. If you. I don't know. My service might be pretty bad out here.

[Lyle]

No, I say it'll. It'll. It'll. Eventually. It'll. I'll eventually see it. Do you. Oh, wait. All right, hold on. Wait, let me see here. Oh, I see him. Okay, Wait, hold on. Oh, yeah. This is a really shitty picture.

[Weston]

Yeah, I told you.

[Lyle]

Oh, wait. Oh, I see them. They're, like, really tiny in the background. Okay. They're little dots. Yeah. Okay.

[Weston]

They're probably, like, a football field away.

[Lyle]

Okay, that's cool.

[Weston]

Oh, so, yeah, we have orchards out here. Pecan or pecan. I don't know how. How y' all say it up there in Jersey, but, yeah, you're asking about the animals. That's. That's pretty much all of them. I mean, we have, like, mice all kinds of birds, pretty much anything you can think of out here.

[Lyle]

Have you ever been attacked by anything?

[Weston]

Been attacked by a dog, A wild dog? Oh, we have wild dog.

[Lyle]

How is that.

[Weston]

But that one. That one didn't. It was kind of like a smaller dog. I just picked it up and threw it, and then I was fine. My arm was bleeding a little bit, but nothing too crazy. My. My dad says whenever I was little, in our barn, there was a. There was a baby rattlesnake. And he said I was just pushing it across the floor with my foot for like two minutes. My dad thought it was a rope, and then he. He, like, did a double take and he ran over there and grabbed me and kill it. Killed it, but it never bit me, which is super lucky.

[Lyle]

Do you. Do you have any fears?

[Weston]

Fears? So I have a contradicting fear of being afraid of height, but I love to climb. I love to climb stuff.

[Lyle]

You love to climb stuff, even though you have a fear of heights?

[Weston]

Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

What, like, what stuff are you climbing?

[Weston]

So I'll climb, like, up on a barn to fix the roof, and I'm like, I love. I love, like, the art of climbing up there. But once I'm up there, I'm like, oh, shoot. This is kind of scary.

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Weston]

Being on the ground sounds pretty nice right about now and then. But like an airplane, I can't really. I used to have this, so I used to be terrified of elevators, thunderstorms, and airplanes. And I think it was due to the fact that they're like, gary, if they start going down, and I have no control over it. But then as I grew older, I was just like, well, I really have no control, so I'm just gonna let nature run its course and see what happens.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I. That's. That's. I've kind of ended up adopting that philosophy in a lot of ways as well.

[Weston]

Yeah, it's kind of whatever happens, but.

[Lyle]

What's your name again?

[Weston]

Weston.

[Lyle]

Weston.

[Weston]

Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

Weston, I've appreciated this little window into your life. This has been nice. This has been quaint.

[Weston]

Yeah, absolutely. I wish. I wish you could come down here and visit, because I have family in New Jersey, so. I've seen. I've seen it, But. But you haven't seen this because, like, you look to my left, there's a bunch of green trees in this orchard. You look to my right, there's a bunch of dead trees. Because. Because it's like a desert out here.

[Lyle]

What's the biggest. What's the. The closest big city next to you.

[Weston]

It would have to be Midland. But if that's not big enough, I'm about five hours away from San Antonio and Dallas and about six hours away from Houston.

[Lyle]

What's the sheriff's name again?

[Weston]

Sheriff Keith.

[Lyle]

Sheriff Keith, yes, sir. And they're. And. But they're. And they're. And they're keep. And they're keeping an eye on you?

[Weston]

Yes, but not a like parental eye. More of a. I just waved at the South African. Not a parental eye, but more of just like a. That's a funny thing to do kind of eye.

[Lyle]

Before we go, are there any other. I kind of want to give you the opportunity. If there are any other stories that you have about wacky farm shenanigans, I would love to hear them.

[Weston]

Wacky farm shenanigans?

[Lyle]

Yeah. Like blowing up the fridges.

[Weston]

Yeah. So me and the South Africans fixed up this Polaris. It's like a four seater, a thousand cc, which is pretty, pretty, like souped up. And then we're going like 70 down this dirt road, 70 miles an hour. And then he just starts doing donuts. And then we haul it and we start jumping stuff. And then we. We turned and it like leaned up on its side and then it stopped and we broke the belt to like power the. The wheels. And if we had more power, we would have flipped. So it was like a. It was like a crazy moment. And that was like a couple days ago.

[Lyle]

Does that. Does that stuff not scare the shit out of you?

[Weston]

No, I had a seatbelt on. I was good.

[Lyle]

If. But if the fucking car flips, does it matter if you have a seatbelt on?

[Weston]

Yeah. Cuz then. I know. Then I don't fly away. I stay with it.

[Lyle]

All right, well, you know more than me.

[Weston]

No, I wouldn't say that. You're pretty wise. I love your stuff.

[Lyle]

Thanks, man. I appreciate it, Weston, but I don't know. I don't know anything about cars, actually. No, I know enough about cars to know that it's probably not good to flip them over and be in them while that's happening.

[Weston]

But that is a very slow point.

[Lyle]

You know, I just. I just like you, Weston. I don't want you to die.

[Weston]

Oh, that means a lot, Lyle.

[Lyle]

I don't want you to. You. You're. You. You're a night.

[Weston]

You're.

[Lyle]

You're a nice guy. You're. You're a real. You're a real American. And I don't want you to meet an early death underneath a fucking truck.

[Weston]

Yeah, that's a Good point. I do have a rather heavy foot when I'm driving, but I inherited that from my dad, too.

[Lyle]

So what's your relationship like with your parents? Are they cool?

[Weston]

Yeah, yeah, they're. They're amazing. I would never. I would never want anyone else. And then I've been told by a bunch of my dad's, like, college friends that he's. He's the best guy that you could ever have as a dad, and, like, as a friend, he'd do anything. And I was. I was super, super lucky with the parents that I got, and they're luckily still together. And then I have a sister. I. I believe she's going to be a nun. She's like, so she's like the sweetest person ever. And then my grandparents are amazing, so kind. My brother's a. A. He's good for a brother. Like. No, I'm. I'm so, so lucky to have the environment that I had growing up.

[Lyle]

What's your dad's deal? Is he. You know, I mean, I guess they're all. Also their. Your parents are both farmers?

[Weston]

Yeah. So my mom stays at home. She's a stay at home mom. And then my dad's a farmer. Yeah, farming really takes up kind of all of your time, but at the same time, you are your own boss, so you can do whatever you want, if that makes sense. Like unlimited vacation days.

[Lyle]

How old are your siblings? Are you the oldest?

[Weston]

No, I'm. I'm the middle child, so. So my sister's older. She just graduated from Texas A and M in College Station.

[Lyle]

Cool.

[Weston]

I. I believe she got some kind of agricultural degree, but she has a minor in religious studies. And I'm. I'm like 99 sure that she's going to be a nun, which, which is great for her, but also I'm gonna miss her because with that lifestyle, she's going to be very isolated and I just won't get to see her as much, if that makes sense. But she's. She's awesome. And then my brother is younger than me. He's gonna be a senior in high school this year.

[Lyle]

Do you. Sorry, go ahead. Do you have a. Do you have a brotherly relationship with him? Do you watch after him? I mean, you're not that much older. I. You're like 19. He's like 18, right?

[Weston]

Yeah. So I know I'm not super, I guess, protective over him, if you will, because, I don't know. He. Yeah, he's not too far behind me. He can do whatever he wants, but if, if the circumstance came. Yeah. I'd do anything for him or for anybody, really.

[Lyle]

You would do anything for anybody?

[Weston]

Anybody? I know enough like you. I've been listening to you for like since 2019. I did anything for you, Lyle.

[Lyle]

How, how, how much do you have to know someone for you to be able to do anything for them?

[Weston]

Enough to know that they're a good person. Fuck. Shit.

[Lyle]

You're a cool guy, Weston. I really. I really mean it. I don't want you to die. You seem like a nice boy.

[Weston]

I don't want you to die either.

[Lyle]

I imagine you as like a Tom Sawyer character that has a dog.

[Weston]

I do have two dogs. Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Weston]

I love them so much too. So one is a sheep dog. She. She does not participate in cheap in doing of the sheep, but she's just a house dog. But she's awesome. She's a little. Probably like I got her for one of my birthdays, probably like 6 years old. And she's the happiest little thing. And then we adopted my grandparents dog whenever they moved into town. And she's. She's probably like 15 years old. A brown lab and she. I don't know how much longer she's gonna make it, but she's a happy little thing.

[Lyle]

Are you close to. Sorry, go ahead.

[Weston]

I was just gonna say she has a little shedding disorder. I have to help her brush because she's getting old.

[Lyle]

Are you close with your grandparents?

[Weston]

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. So I always. One thing I always kind of do is I look at. I look at myself through the person that I'm interacting with, like their shoes. So I'm like, if, if I was a grandparent, what would I want my grandson to do? And I'm like, well, I'd love for him to just come by and visit. So I do my best to like go to both my grandparents and just sit down, visit with them. We actually ate with one of them for Father's Day yesterday. And then I'm. Yeah, I'm. I'm super close to my grandparents. So. Funny thing is, one of my. My mom's parents live two miles away from my house and my dad's parents live one mile away from my house.

[Lyle]

So you're right there, you're right next to. It's super easy to get to be close to him.

[Weston]

Yes, sir. Yes, sir. And then I have 13 cousins on my dad's side and I know all of them super well. We're all super close family. And then I have two cousins on my mom's side and they live in New Jersey with you over there.

[Lyle]

So you are. You're close with all 13 of your cousins?

[Weston]

All 15? Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

Geez, man, that's awesome. And why you guys have. You guys have, like, big get togethers on the farm?

[Weston]

Yeah. So, like, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, we'll all gather together and just like, all them will drink. I'm not a. I'm not a. I've never been into drinking. I don't smoke either. But, you know, it seems everybody I hang out with, they. They're always. They always smoke and drink, which, again, absolutely nothing wrong with that. It's just not my cup of tea.

[Lyle]

Yeah, you don't want to be flipping any more cars than you already are.

[Weston]

Right. That would probably increase with alcohol consumption.

[Lyle]

Right? You're a blessed man. I'm. I'm. I feel like I suck for not remembering your name. Oh, Weston. Weston.

[Weston]

No problem.

[Lyle]

Weston, you're a blessed man. You really are. I really don't want you to die. Weston, you're a blessed man. You have a close family. You have a strong idea with. Of what you want to do with your life. You're adventurous. You're. Have a great family. I mean, yeah, you're. You're about as blessed as I think a guy can be.

[Weston]

Yes, sir. Absolutely. And I'm. I'm so grateful for it. I try to do my best for everybody else. Kind of. Kind of give back in a way, but I don't know how that makes sense. Just give all my blessings that I've received in my life. I just try to help other people out and whatever that takes. But, yeah, I always try to, like, form get togethers with my friends, because I know sometimes it's kind of hard to get everybody together, but I do my best.

[Lyle]

That's an important role to have in the friend group, the Gatherer. Because some people. Because a group chat can just lay dormant for years without anyone ever actually getting out of it.

[Weston]

Yeah, absolutely. Like, during college, our group chat almost died. And then as soon as summer hit, I hit it up, and we're all in my grandpa's pit. We had fridges, we had tannerite, and we had guns, and we had wine bottles, and we fill them with gas, and then we shove a rag down there, and you light the rag on fire and you throw the bottle, and when it breaks, all the gas comes out, and it's like a fiery inferno.

[Lyle]

Yeah, you guys are making. Yeah, you guys are making Molotovs. I've played video games.

[Weston]

Yeah. It is the best thing ever I.

[Lyle]

God damn it. I'm not gonna ever try that in my entire life. I really. I. I really don't want you to die, Weston. You know. You know. You know what the problem. You know the problem is, Weston, is I just. You're like. You're like a Jenga tower. I feel. I don't actually mean what I'm about to say. I. I'm just bullshitting you, but you're like a Jenga tower where, like, I feel like flipping cars and making homemade Molotov cocktails is just as integral to who you are as, like, you know, all of the good things in your life that if. If you pull, it's almost like you can't have you without those things. I don't actually believe that in any way, shape, or form, but I kind of do a little bit.

[Weston]

Yeah. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.

[Lyle]

Just. I don't. I just don't blow your arm off with fireworks or light your dogs on fire.

[Weston]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

I mean, do you. I mean, you have. What were you gonna say?

[Weston]

I was gonna say I singed all the hair off my arm last week. So one of my tires went flat on the plow, and so I got starting fluid and a lighter, and I shot some in there and then shot it and lit it, and it just inflated the tire. And I was like, this is the best thing ever. Fire is just, like, so entertaining and useful. It's an amazing tool.

[Lyle]

You have, what, 13 cousins?

[Weston]

13? On my dad's side? Yes, sir.

[Lyle]

Okay, so 15 in total. And. And so you have a lot of other people your age around you, do I. And I assume that they are cut from similar cloth as you?

[Weston]

Yes.

[Lyle]

Yeah, and no. And nobody's ever gotten into any horrible accidents or blew their arms off or killed a dog.

[Weston]

So my. So about the arm. My friend lost the tip of his finger roping Sears, but my great, great grandma lost her arm in a tornado when she was pregnant with my great grandpa.

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Weston]

And my great Grandpa was the ninth child of 18.

[Lyle]

You're living a. You're living an interesting life, man. I really can't think. I really. I can't think of anything that could make your life better except maybe, like, a shield.

[Weston]

A shield.

[Lyle]

That.

[Weston]

That is an awesome idea. I'll have to make one.

[Lyle]

I'm gonna go ahead. I'm live on Twitch right now. I'm gonna see if the Twitch Chat has any questions. Twitch Chat. If you guys have any questions, I'll. I'll read them out to. To Mr. Weston. Someone said just a Little bit of reckless pyromania for the youth as a treat.

[Weston]

Absolutely.

[Lyle]

Someone wants to know your thoughts on the Switch 2.

[Weston]

The Switch 2. So I've had. I've had the switch, like, as soon as it came out, and I love that thing. But I have sadly gone away from the switch and onto the steam deck, so I'm not gonna lie. I didn't know there's a switch too, but I'm might have to invest into it.

[Lyle]

I'm kind of surprised that you even play video games. You seem like you're, like, too busy lighting stuff on fire.

[Weston]

You got to make time for everything, which is a hard thing for my girlfriend to understand.

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Weston]

Part about knowing someone, Everybody is you have to make time for everybody.

[Lyle]

Someone just asked if you had a significant other and if it's hard to find one out there. So you have a girlfriend?

[Weston]

It. Yeah, I do. So it is extremely hard to find one because everybody is related to me.

[Lyle]

Did you just find. Yeah. Do you just find the girl who lives in your town who just happens to be the least related to you?

[Weston]

So I found the girl from the neighboring town that wasn't related to me.

[Lyle]

There we go. Rock and roll.

[Weston]

Boom.

[Lyle]

It's a real catch.

[Weston]

Oh, yeah.

[Lyle]

And how long have you two been together?

[Weston]

We've been together since April 28th of last year.

[Lyle]

Very nice. How's it going?

[Weston]

It's going great. Yeah. So she really loves me, like, more than anybody, and I'm so grateful for that. And, you know, we've had our struggles, but, you know, we. We don't, like, give the silent treatment or let the problem solve itself. You know, we'll sit down and talk about it and, you know, get everything straight, you know, understand the other person's perspective is a huge part of it. And, yeah, we're doing great. She has one younger sister. She's an interesting one, but I bring her cookies, and she's. She's great.

[Lyle]

That's so sweet. What's your. So what's your girlfriend's like deal? Is she also another farm farmer?

[Weston]

So she lives out in the country and her dad ranches, like, half ranches. Half is the superintendent of the water district of the city. So she has. She has enough farm in her, so she's great.

[Lyle]

Is her dad intimidating to you? Like, is it like a you must gain my approval? Like, I feel like in a small town. Is it like a whole you must gain my approval before dating my. My daughter kind of deal?

[Weston]

So that's how I thought it was gonna be. And he's. He's like 6 4, £250. He was a bodybuilder in. In high school and college, I believe. And I. I weigh 140. I'm 5 11. I'm. I'm lean, but I don't have a lot of muscle. So, yeah, extremely intimidating guy. But the second time I met him, we were, like, best friends already. He likes me way more than my girlfriend. Anyway, he.

[Lyle]

He said he likes you more than he likes his daughter.

[Weston]

His daughter? Yeah. So. So does their mom. My girlfriend's mom, she likes me more, too.

[Lyle]

Someone asked you, are you planning to have kids? And if you do, will you let them play with fire?

[Weston]

I will absolutely let them play with fire. And I would love kids, because the idea of raising a family because I'm so close with my family that, like, it's not even a second thought to not have kids, because I just. I. You know, I want to be a father. I want to watch these little pet sperms that I created grow up and, like, you know, develop their own personalities.

[Lyle]

Mm.

[Weston]

So I just think that would be awesome.

[Lyle]

Someone wants to know what your favorite fast food is, and they have a guess for what it is, but I'm not going to tell you because I want to hear what. What it is.

[Weston]

Okay. I don't get fast food a lot because I'm an hour from the nearest town, but probably Canes.

[Lyle]

Canes. They guess Subway. No, they guess Subway. I don't know why they guess Subway. I thought. I think it's kind of a bad guess, to be honest.

[Weston]

Yeah, I mean, I could. I could get horny for some Subway every now and then.

[Lyle]

Same.

[Weston]

But Cane. Cane's is really fast, and they're consistent.

[Lyle]

What do you eat? Would you. I just. I assume you cook a lot.

[Weston]

Yeah. Yeah. So we have a lot of steak, like, ribs, pork, like, a lot of meat, I guess. Pork chop. Last night we had. Yeah, steak. The South Africans make a lot of, like, spicy. It's all about their spices, is what makes their food taste cool.

[Lyle]

And you've been eating a lot of South African food lately?

[Weston]

Yes. Yes, sir. Lately.

[Lyle]

Someone asked if you've ever. Oh, sorry. Go ahead, finish.

[Weston]

I was trying to think of food. I'm not a huge vegetable guy, but since I hit college, I was like, you know what? I should probably eat a little bit of vegetables. So I never, like, intentionally make vegetables, but at a restaurant, if they come on my plate, I try to eat them. If that makes it.

[Lyle]

Somebody asked if you ever cook any roadkill?

[Weston]

No. Not roadkill.

[Lyle]

Would you? If you like. Listen, we'll eat it like. Oh, I see. You've killed and eaten a deer.

[Weston]

Oh, absolutely. I've killed, like, a rabbit and ate it. A, A rattlesnake. We've tried that too. And then, so there's a cottontail rabbit and a jackrabbit. A jackrabbit is a lot bigger and they taste awful, but jack. But cottontail tastes like chicken and rattlesnake tastes like chicken.

[Lyle]

People who regularly listen to this podcast are be annoyed at me for bringing this back up, but have you ever played red Dead Redemption 2?

[Weston]

I have not, but I've watched my friend play it a lot.

[Lyle]

I think you, I think you would like it.

[Weston]

I would probably like it. I play GTA 5.

[Lyle]

Yeah. But, you know, I, I, I will say in the, in the city versus country debate, gta, representing the city, Red Dead Redemption. Representing the country, Red Dead Redemption. Significantly better gaming experience.

[Weston]

Very true. Do they have Molotov and Red Dead Redemption?

[Lyle]

They do, yeah. I'm almost positive they do.

[Weston]

All right, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll test it out and I'll call back eventually, let you know how it went.

[Lyle]

Have you ever eaten a badger?

[Weston]

Have not eaten a badger, but I, I can make it happen if you really want to know.

[Lyle]

No, no, no, no. Let those.

[Weston]

Because that was. That badger had a whole family. I better not.

[Lyle]

Yeah. I was gonna ask you one other thing about. Oh, how's it feel to, like, kill and eat an animal? Because I, I eat a lot of animals. I just don't kill them myself. I financially support their deaths by, you know, consuming the meat, but I don't get the, I don't, I don't get to kill them. My s. How does that feel, that you, you see a thing and then you, you eat it?

[Weston]

That's a good question. It feels, it really feels like two different parts. So you think, like, so if, like, I kill a deer and then I eat it while I'm eating it, I'm not thinking of, like, oh, this poor deer might have had a family, and, you know, stuff, because, like, whenever I'm, I'm killing, it is. I'm in one mood, I guess. And then whenever I'm eating it, it's just like eating any other food. Like, you know, I just stopped by Subway and grabbed a sandwich, right, with, with steak in it. I'm not thinking of the cow. I'm just kind of eating it, thinking of the flavor, you know?

[Lyle]

Yeah. Isn't that so Interesting that, like, we eat. We're so far removed from, like, all the. That we're eating.

[Weston]

Yeah, that's. It's absolutely crazy.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I'm not. I'm not. I'm not planning on ever doing anything about it ever in my entire life, but it is. It is crazy. It is crazy to think about. Weston, great talking to you, man. Anything else you want to say about farm life, about Western life, about anything at. Else at all before we go.

[Weston]

About Western life? Invest in a radar detector.

[Lyle]

What the fuck is that?

[Weston]

It goes off whenever the cop is hitting you with his speed tracking stuff.

[Lyle]

Why don't you just go. Why don't you just go like, 10 miles above the speed limit and not die?

[Weston]

So on a. On a casual day, I'll drive about 80, and most of our roads around here are 75, so that's a reasonable speed.

[Lyle]

All right.

[Weston]

But. But when you get into town, the speed limits get slower, the cops get more abundant, so radar detector is an amazing investment, and it's the price of a ticket. So, like, you're saving yourself tenfold.

[Lyle]

That's so funny that that exists, that there's. You could detect police radars.

[Weston]

Yeah. I can't believe you didn't. You've never heard of that? Because that's, like, super, super popular out here. Which. Which we have long distances to drive. Like I mentioned, we're an hour from town, and you might walk down the street to your grocery store. We have to drive an hour, so.

[Lyle]

Don't fucking die, Weston. Don't fucking die. I liked. I liked. I liked talking to you. I got to know you. The people listening to this podcast got to know you. They like you that, don't they? We don't want you to die, Weston. Just don't die. Just keep not dying.

[Weston]

That means a lot.

[Lyle]

Keep. Keep. Keep living your best life while. While also being careful to not die.

[Weston]

I love living my life, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

[Lyle]

Have a good rest of the night, Weston. Thank you very much for calling.

[Weston]

Yes, sir. You too. I'll keep it up.

[Lyle]

Later, man. That was a good kid. I like that guy. He's interesting. I still don't understand. Can anyone explain that for me in the comments section? Cotton. Do people buy cotton? I mean, I know they use it to make some shirts, but is that. That's really it, right, though? They make sure they make shirts with a lot of stuff, you know, how much? How much? What's the what? How much can the cotton market be Go. If you're an expert on the cotton market. Please comment in the Spotify comments or the or the itunes whatever or the YouTube whatever. Please let me know. I got to know more about cotton.

[Jemma Spaeg]

This is Jemma Spaeg from the psychology of your twenties unlock smarter learning with Lenovo AI powered PCs powered by Intel Core Ultra processors. Head to lenovo.com and choose from multiple devices to fit your passions. If you're a gamer, you can spend less time stressing about GPUs and CPUs and more time dominating with the AI enabled smart engine which optimizes your game performance in real time. Or maybe you're a scientist on the verge of a groundbreaking discovery and need a device with a longer battery life and AI enhanced tools to give you extra time to finish your research. Or you're a musician preparing for your biggest break and need better, faster AI tools to make digital art a breeze, like creating band posters and T shirt designs. Or you're a soon to be graduate needing to catch a recruiter's eye to land that dream job. So you need cutting edge smart tools to build your portfolio from scratch. That's the power of Lenovo with Intel Inside. Plus college students and teachers get 5% off with an education account on Lenovo.com A Better Future is waiting and it needs you.

[Lyle]

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. Now.

[Ryan Seacrest]

I was looking for fun ways to.

[Lyle]

Tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited premium wireless for $15 a month is back.

[Ryan Seacrest]

So I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills, but it turns out that's very illegal, so there goes my big idea for the commercial.

[Lyle]

Give it a try at mintmobile.com/switch upfront.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Payment of 45 for three month plan equivalent to 15 per month required new customer offer for first three months only speed slow after 35 gigabytes of networks busy taxes and fees extra c mintmobile.com.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags on items like Kraft Mac and Cheese, Celsius energy drinks, Quaker Chewy bars and sparkling ice flavored water. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Pablo]

You're great at protecting your own personal information. You probably even use things like two factor authentication, strong passwords and a VPN but as much as you try to be in control of how your information is protected, there are lots of places that also have it and they might not be as careful as you are. That's why LifeLock monitors millions of data points every second for identity threats. If your identity is stolen, a LifeLock US based restoration specialist will help solve identity theft issues on your behalf, guaranteed or your money back. Plus, all LifeLock plans are backed by the million dollar protection package, meaning LifeLock will reimburse you up to the limits of your plan. If you lose money due to identity theft, you might not be able to control how others handle your personal information, but you can help protect it. With LifeLock. Save up to 40% your first year. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code iheart or go to lifelock.com iheart for 40% off terms apply.

[Lyle]

Hello.

[Alden]

What's up, man?

[Lyle]

What's up? What's your name?

[Alden]

I'm Pablo. Let's go with Pablo.

[Lyle]

Pablo?

[Alden]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

You share a fake name with the Penguin from the Backyardigans and the famous painter Pablo Picasso, both of whom I believe made fairly significant contributions to society.

[Alden]

You know, I, I couldn't, I couldn't tell you one thing Pablo Pagasso did, but I could tell you like five things Pablo the Penguin did.

[Lyle]

Fucking do it again. Do it. Do it. Say five things to Pablo the Penguin did.

[Alden]

Okay, he is blue. I guess he didn't do blue, but he is blue.

[Lyle]

You know what? I, you know what? That one's true. Being blue is not the same, is not really doing something. But I'll let you have it. Okay, Four more.

[Alden]

Yeah, and anyway, is he Hispanic? I don't know. Is he Hispanic or black? I don't, I don't know what he is.

[Lyle]

But you just said he.

[Alden]

Yeah, but you know, like, ethnicity wise, like, I, I'm Hispanic and I feel like I identified myself in Pablo, you know what I mean? Kind of like how like Darwin and Amazing World of Gone was like black pretty much. You know what I mean?

[Lyle]

Yeah. And that makes a lot of sense, I think, I think he's Hispanic. I think he's canonically Hispanic. Although that doesn't make a lot of sense because I don't think there are any Latin countries that penguins are native to. Pablo. Pablo.

[Alden]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lyle]

What's up? What's up, man? What would you want to talk to them? What'd you want to talk about today?

[Alden]

I, it's funny, I, I, I will watch your streams every now and then. I'll usually just watch it when it uploads on YouTube. But I usually, like, don't have. I usually, like, have something to talk about every time I call you and I don't reach. And this time I don't have any. Well, I do have any. I do have something. I. I'm 22, and I may or may not be becoming a father. And I don't. I'm not. I'm not in the. I don't want to be a dad. You know what I mean? Not yet.

[Lyle]

May or may not. May mean a lot of things. How. How. What does may or may not mean?

[Alden]

So. So I, you know, it's. It's one of those things where, you know, you're. You're in it, and then you're like, you don't know. You know, obviously use protection. That's very, very smart. And that's something I don't do.

[Weston]

And.

[Alden]

Yeah, it's just one thing led to another, and I. You know, the. The girl that I'm with, my girlfriend, she, like, you know, the ovulation phase, you know, there's that period of time where the egg is, like, can be fertilized for like, 12 to 24 hours. And she was in that. I don't know if she was in that window, but, you know, there's like a day. Like a day's worth. Like, maybe I could be wrong, but, like, it's like days. Like the. The windows, like, days long. But, like, the egg is. Sorry, I'm really nervous. I watched it for years.

[Lyle]

It's okay, man. Take your time.

[Alden]

But, but, but, yeah, she, you know, it's in that window, and she may or may not have been, you know, it's a specific day where, like, you know, you can. If you, you know, if you forget my language, if you're not. And the, you know, you're. The person you're with, you know, that you could. She could be pregnant, and she was. She may or may not have been in that window, and I may or may not have finished, you know, because I was high. And that's another thing, too. Like, there's a lot of factors, you know, a lot of factors where I. I couldn't tell you.

[Lyle]

So. So, okay, hold on. So, hold on, hold on. Okay, so. So, okay, so your girlfriend's not on birth control.

[Alden]

Correct.

[Lyle]

And you. You did. You, like, you didn't even pull out. Like, you came inside of her.

[Alden]

Okay, so. Okay, so here. Okay, we're gonna get. This is. Dude, I've watched you for years. I love you like, Pablo.

[Lyle]

Thank you. Pablo. I love you very much too. I think I love you in the way I love you in the sense that you and I find ourselves at the. In the same cosmic predicament of being alive at this blimp of time in the universe.

[Alden]

But go ahead, dude, I'm sober right now. This is crazy that this is happening while I'm sober. Anyway. Yeah, so what I was saying is. Yeah, so. So yeah, yeah, you were saying. I don't know if I came in here, I was high, but like, you know that. Okay, so again, kind of tmi, but you know that kind of when you're in it or like, you know, you're sort of in it, but then, you know, you're kind of. You're kind of going in it. Sorry, you, like, you don't finish all the way, but you sort of do.

[Lyle]

You, like, kind of accidentally. Yeah, sure. Okay. You didn't.

[Alden]

A partial shot, a partial load. I don't know what you call that. Partial night.

[Lyle]

You know, I'm gonna. Actually, I'm. Here's the thing, here's the thing, here's the thing. The details of the logistics of things are not, Are not important. You believe there is a chance that some of your semen ended up in your girlfriend's vagina. Okay. And so how long ago was this that you.

[Alden]

So it was yesterday. Last night. I. There was so many other factors. I couldn't.

[Lyle]

Hold on, hold on, hold on. This was last night?

[Alden]

This was last night.

[Lyle]

Okay, a few things. First of all, I am pretty sure that the plan B pill has. I'm pretty sure you're in a 48 hour window with the plan B pill.

[Alden]

Okay, so. So here's the thing too, isn't. I mean, you and I are probably the least, you know, reliable sources on this, but like, is. Can't. Isn't prem. Plan B. Doesn't it not work when you're like, you know, in that fertile window or like when the egg is in that 12 to 24 hour phase where it's like it's there, you know, I mean, it can be fertilized.

[Lyle]

You know, it's funny. Pablo, I genuinely, I really appreciate that you're fan of the show and that you're excited to be talking to me, but you should really not be on the phone with me right now. You should really be feverish. You should really be with your girlfriend figuring this out. This happened to last year. I thought when you said you may or may not be a father, I thought it was like a thing where you and your girlfriend Were like decide she was pregnant. You guys were deciding, you know, whether you wanted to do or, you know, I didn't realize that this was. This happened to last. It's. Dude, it's the morning. It's literally. It's literally the morning after.

[Alden]

Dude. And you do.

[Lyle]

Where's your. Where's your. Hold on. Where's your girlfriend right now?

[Alden]

She's. She's out. She's at work right now.

[Lyle]

What. What It. What did she have to say about all of this?

[Alden]

She. I mean, obviously she's fucking freaking out. This is. Okay. And this is another thing. I feel horrible. I feel like. I feel like an asshole because she's not. Not this week, but the next week she's driving with their friend. We're all in college. She's driving with her friend and out. She's in an outing club. You know, it's like a. They backpack and they do like, they. They like to hike for days. You know what I mean? And I don't. I don't find the enjoyment in it, but like, you know, teach their own. But she's going on a six week backpacking trip to New and New Hampshire along the Appalachian Trail, I think. And like, this is probably the worst time to like, have a pregnancy scare, you know, I mean, because she won't know, you know, she's pregnant. So like, two weeks later, you know, waiting for a period.

[Lyle]

Dude, you're okay. By the way, just to clear this up. She does not want to be pregnant, correct?

[Alden]

No, yeah, we do not want to be pregnant. We want to, you know, bro, go.

[Lyle]

Go to the. Go to CVS or Walgreens or whatever right now and buy a plan B pill, my guy. It's. This happened. You're telling. This happened last night.

[Alden]

Yeah. Okay. Okay, so. Yeah, let me. Yeah, so I should probably say everything so we're on the same page with her. But I did get rid of plan B today. But like.

[Lyle]

Oh, wait, okay, so you did. Okay, hold on. So. So you did.

[Weston]

So, like.

[Alden]

Yeah, so like, we're kind of in the clear. I just don't, you know, I guess I won't really know until she gets a period, but she won't. She'll be out of state, you know, by the time.

[Lyle]

Okay, so, you know, so she took a plan B pill.

[Alden]

Correct.

[Lyle]

Oh, okay. So she. Okay, so first of all, you only kind of think that you may have accidentally came in her. And I'm like, she took. And she took a plan B pill?

[Alden]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lyle]

Is that. Am I understanding that correctly?

[Alden]

Yeah, but now I like, don't feel as worried, but I should. You know what I mean? Because like the. For the ovula. I don't know. I'm not a. Not a woman doctor, but you know, the ovulation. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lyle]

Well, okay, well, here's. Well, first of all, a few things is. One is I'm pretty. I feel like people who, like, you know, what's it funny? People who are like trying to get pregnant have a hard time with it, you know, so the fact that this. What? You weren't even trying and.

[Alden]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

And you had a plan. People. You're. I mean, you're probably not a doctor. I don't fucking know. But you're probably fine. But I get. It's a scare for sure. I get it. To scare. Yeah, I guess. What? You know, like. So I guess you just have to wait until she has her period.

[Alden]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lyle]

Mm. And she's at work.

[Alden]

She at work right now? Yeah.

[Lyle]

Okay. How's she doing?

[Alden]

I mean, she's like scared and shit. Because like, I. I was the one that, like, usually she's. I mean, okay, truth be told, like, we've had like scares too. I. I'm not a very use protection, you know, I mean, I don't. I don't, you know, because I'm stupid. But anyway, are you.

[Lyle]

Are you gonna. Wait, wait, wait. Are you. Are you gonna continue to not use protection?

[Alden]

No, no. Like, like this was a. Like, she was like, she. It was, it was the whole thing last night, dude, you know, she was crying and. Because she's so stressed, you know, and I was trying to like. So here's how it went last night. She's all stressed because she's planning for this trip and she has her sister's wedding this year and. Yeah, my cousin's with, you know, a lot of all this, you know, and it's like coming soon, so it's like she doesn't, you know, the six week thing is like taking all her time of planning for the wedding and all this shit, so. But she wants to do it and then she's all stressed and I'm telling her like, yo, let me like, like, let me like make you feel better. And then, and then this brings on, you know what I mean? Like, this is the. This is my result if I try to make it feel better. And I gave her this scare, you know, so I.

[Lyle]

Wait, wait.

[Alden]

You.

[Lyle]

You okay? You okay? Your girlfriend was stressed out about like her wedding and you were like, let me make you feel better. By us having sex?

[Alden]

No, no. I guess. But it wasn't like, you know, that wasn't like the point. It just like, led there, you know what I mean?

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Alden]

You know, like, comforting her.

[Lyle]

Okay, sure.

[Alden]

Comforting her. Like I was comforting her, you know?

[Lyle]

How long have you. How long have you. How long have you two been dating?

[Alden]

For like a year, a year and a half.

[Lyle]

Okay. Is every. Is everything going good otherwise?

[Alden]

Yeah. Yeah, I like. Yeah. Yeah, pretty good.

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Alden]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

I mean, I assume she's at work right now. She's texting. I assume she's texting you and freaking out.

[Alden]

I actually texted her a little bit ago saying, like, I got on the call with you because I like, we're like, both fans of you.

[Lyle]

That's. That's very nice. Okay.

[Alden]

I'm talking about you.

[Lyle]

I think you got. Look, here's the thing. You guys did everything I think you could do, right? Like, yeah, probably be fine. Just be. Just be. Just be there for your girlfriend, man, while she's dealing with all this stuff. That's all I really got.

[Alden]

Yeah. Yeah, I thought so, too. I. This is like the last. Like, this is like the last thing I wanted to talk to you about if I ever got on call, but.

[Lyle]

You said, well, I'm sure. So, yeah, it's what's on your mind right now. But what. I mean, I'm looking this up right now. Yeah. The window of effectiveness for plan B, an emergency contraceptive pill, is up to 72 hours.

[Alden]

All right. All right. Yeah, so we're good. I feel like, you know.

[Lyle]

Let'S see here. Let's see. Let's see. Plan B effectiveness rate. Okay. Within 24 hours, plan B is approximately 95% effective.

[Alden]

Okay.

[Lyle]

This is pretty good odds. Okay. Plan B is less effective if you are overweight, you have already ovulated, and you are taking certain medications. But you didn't. But it was this. But you're not even telling me that it was like. That you, like, shot. It was like a full load.

[Alden]

So.

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Alden]

Yeah. Okay. Do you know what I'm talking about? You know, it wasn't a full load, but it was like a. It was like a. It wasn't a pre. Come either. It was like a partial load, you know?

[Lyle]

I mean, you.

[Weston]

I.

[Lyle]

Okay, you started coming and then you pulled out, I'm gonna assume.

[Alden]

I guess. But it was weird because I usually feel like when I'm going to. But that time I didn't. So, like, I'm like, did I. You know, what was that rush of liquid? You know, What?

[Lyle]

I mean, look, all right, here's what you do, Pablo. Look, tell her. Tell her that. Tell her you spoke to the therapy gecko and that he googled it and said that there's a 95% chance that you're fine.

[Alden]

Okay. I'll tell her that I'll probably make it for better.

[Lyle]

I hope so. I hope so. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, just be, you know, just, you know, she'll probably. She's. Yeah, I mean, she'll probably be, you know, understandably so, a little freaked out until she has a period again and, you know, just fucking. Just.

[Alden]

I mean, that's life, right?

[Lyle]

Yeah, I mean, it is. Just be with her. Just be in it with her until, you know, it gets resolved.

[Alden]

Yeah, no, I saw her at lunch. It was. I mean, she's, like, freaked, you know, but I mean, you know, I'm doing what I can, you know, she, you know. Yeah.

[Lyle]

What was it? You said that you. There was another thing that you wanted to talk about, I think, or. You said that every time you think about calling, it was a new thing. I'm very curious. Because I'm curious, like, is it. Do you have a pregnancy scare every. Every week?

[Alden]

Nah, nah, nah, nah.

[Weston]

I don't know.

[Alden]

I guess I'm. I'm a little high right now because I'm talking to you and. But I don't know. I guess I've always wanted. We saw you in Chicago In May of 23, I think, or whenever you. It was when Kermit. Kermit was on stage. You remember that?

[Lyle]

Yeah, that was about a year ago. Yeah, and at the Den.

[Alden]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cool show. Yeah, it was fire. We wanted to see you. We wanted to see you, but you said there was a show right after yours, so if we wanted to meet you, we'd have to wait until after that, but we were like, let's. Let's just get pizza.

[Lyle]

Well, hey, listen, maybe. Maybe. Maybe if I do a. Maybe if I do a tour again in. In 21 years, you can come with your son.

[Alden]

Yeah. Yeah. I would tell him how, like, you said we weren't gonna have a kid, and then. And then we had a kid.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I kind of jinxed it a little bit. No, you're gonna be fine. You're both gonna be fine. Yeah, I think. I mean, I can't. I. I can. I can. There's a 95% chance you guys are both gonna be fine.

[Alden]

Yeah. And thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah, I mean, I don't know, man. I guess, like, I. I've always wanted to tell you. Like, I. I'm. I'm entering my grad school year. I'm gonna be a grad student this year. I'm studying healthcare administration. And about four years ago, when you. You started in, like, 2020, I started watching you, like, yeah, 21, I think.

[Lyle]

Oh, cool.

[Alden]

My freshman year, I just got out of a relationship from high school, and it was kind of toxic and shit, and I don't know, I was. I was just really lonely freshman year. Like, the whole year, I just feel like I didn't. I didn't do shit. I didn't make friends and shit, and I was just kind of lonely and FOMO and shit, you know? But I always watched you. Like, I always watched you and, you know, talking about, you know, sharing the shit with other people and hearing, like, other people's lives and hearing, you know, you know, how you started. And then now you're, like, really open and shit. Because I remember you used to, like, whenever people ask how you are, you're always like, true, you know. Yeah, whatever. What about you? But now you're, like, really open and like, stuff. And you always say, like, I'm talking too much about myself. But now, like, I listen. You know, Like, I listen. I'm like, hell, yeah. You know.

[Lyle]

Thanks, man. Are you doing. Are you okay? So that was. So. That was like four or five years ago. Are you doing better now, aside from whatever. Aside from what's going on with you in this moment?

[Alden]

Yeah. Yeah, I'm doing really good. I found my. I had, you know, it was one of those things where after a relationship, I know it's high school, but you know what I mean, you find yourself, you know, college, you know, finding out what I like, what I don't like, you know, friendship and relationship and, you know, made me realize I recently lost some friends, you know, from years ago when I was in that time. Like, I was in my lonely, kind of lonely phase. And, like, I had my close friends, at least I had them from my hometown, but now it's realizing, you know, they're not that good, and, you know, kind of letting them go, you know, this year has been kind of crazy because, you know, you just kind of figure out, you know, like, hey, I don't need these people, or, like, you know, even though it sucks to lose them, but, you know, they're not adding anything in your life.

[Lyle]

Yeah, but you're so. I mean. Yeah, but you're so. You're so young. You're about to, like. I mean, you just graduated College. You're about to go into grad school. You're so young. You have so much more. You're going to meet so many more people. Your life is going to continue to evolve. Like, you just have no idea. I don't have any idea. I'm not even really that much older than you. But your life is going to continue to evolve exponentially. I think you're. I think your life. I think the younger you are, the more exponentially your life evolves year to year. Yeah, but that's not like. That's not like an inherent fact. Yeah, yeah, you got. You got a bunch of shit ahead of you, I believe. I hope. I think.

[Alden]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lyle]

Grad school.

[Alden]

You're gonna.

[Lyle]

And what? Healthcare. Health Care Administration.

[Alden]

Yeah, bro. I'm a hand of the budget, you know, I'm saying.

[Lyle]

Okay, Are you gonna. Are you. Do you like. Do you like, deny insurance claims?

[Alden]

Nah, nah, I'm not. I'm not. I'm not gonna be a devil. I'm gonna be like, I'm one of those people I want to like, you know, make it better, you know, Healthcare. Healthcare systems. Fuck healthcare systems as fuck.

[Lyle]

I like that.

[Alden]

Yeah, yeah. I'm not trying to get money.

[Lyle]

Yeah. Who know? Who knows? Maybe one day you'll have it. Maybe one day when you're ready, you'll have a kid and it'll be. It'll be good.

[Alden]

Yeah, yeah, no, I do want one, but like, not now, you know.

[Lyle]

And then when. And then when you do, you can. You guys can watch the backyard against together and you can be like, that's Pablo. He inspired me.

[Alden]

That shit. Dude, you're so wise. Like, that was kind of unk of you to say, but you're not really on.

[Lyle]

Thanks, man. Yeah, I want kids eventually in the future, but I used to think the future didn't exist. And what I mean by that is I used to think that like, if you say, oh, I want to do this in the future, you don't really mean it because you. If you. If you won't do. If you don't want to do something now. It's like the, like the future self doesn't exist and life is just one day and you know, all that bullshit. But I actually think. I think she think that's wrong. I think there is. I think they're kind. I'm low. I'm starting to feel like there kind of is a quote unquote there. I do think you can be ready for things or not ready for things. And I think. I think I just. I think I just fucked up. I watched too many motivational videos, watched too many motivational Reddit videos that made me think I had to do everything in one day. But yeah, I'd like to have kids. Pablo, give your. Give your girlfriend my good. My good graces.

[Alden]

Yeah, I will, bro. It was so cool to talk to you.

[Lyle]

I hope you too, man. Is there anything else you want to say to the people, the computer before we go? Pablo?

[Alden]

Yeah, Wear protection and. Yeah, nah, I just fuck with you, bro. I hope to see you, you know, obviously, take your time. Rest, rest, you know? Yeah, rest, you know, get you.

[Weston]

I'll be back.

[Lyle]

I'll be back on another. I'm not. Not this year, but I'll be back. I'll be back next year. We'll see.

[Alden]

No, yeah, whenever. Yeah, whenever, bro.

[Lyle]

But yeah, give your girlfriend my good graces. All right?

[Alden]

I appreciate it, bro.

[Lyle]

All right, take care, Pablo. Good luck.

[Alden]

You too. Bye.

[Jemma Spaeg]

This is Jemma Spaeg from the psychology of your twenties unlock smarter learning with Lenovo AI powered PCs powered by Intel Core Ultra processors. Head to lenovo.com and choose from multiple devices to fit your passions. If you're a gamer, you can spend less time stressing about GPUs and CPUs and more time dominating with the AI enabled smart engine which optimizes your game performance in real time. Or maybe you're a scientist on the verge of a groundbreaking discovery and need a device with a longer battery life and AI enhanced tools to give you extra time to finish your research. Or you're a musician preparing for your biggest break and need better, faster AI tools to make digital art a breeze, like creating band posters and T shirt designs. Or you're a soon to be graduate needing to catch a recruiter's eye to land that dream job. So you need cutting edge smart tools to build your portfolio from scratch. That's the power of Lenovo with Intel Inside. Plus, college students and teachers get 5% off with an education account on Lenovo.com A Better Future is waiting and it needs you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags on items like Dove ice cream bars, Chips Ahoy cookies, Arrowhead box, bottled water and Charmin bath tissue. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online. For easy drive up and go, pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply, Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Pablo]

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[Ryan Seacrest]

And here we have a specimen from.

[Lyle]

The early 2000s, a legacy investing platform.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Please don't touch the exhibit folks.

[Ryan Seacrest]

It could crash. Ready to step out of the financial history [e-mail] you can invest in almost everything. Stocks, bonds, options and more. You can even put your cash to work at an industry leading 4.1% APY. Leave your clunky, outdated platform behind. Go to public.com and fund your account in five minutes or less. Paid for by Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC. Full [e-mail] disclosures.

[Brie]

Hello.

[Lyle]

Hi, what's your name?

[Alden]

Hi, my name's Alden.

[Lyle]

Alden, Is that Am I like the grocery chain? Like Aldi, like almost?

[Alden]

Yeah, basically like Aldi. That's how I tell people about my name.

[Lyle]

Have we ever spoken before, Alden?

[Alden]

No, we haven't.

[Lyle]

Very cool. Very good. What's up? How you doing today? How's life?

[Alden]

Good. We were supposed to be a bonnaroo today but they canceled it on us.

[Lyle]

Well. Oh yeah, I guess I get bonnered today. Well, it's Sunday. Oh, was it? Okay, so they canceled but they had it on Saturday and Friday.

[Alden]

Yeah, so they had it till Friday and it was downpouring and then all of a sudden they canceled it mid Friday because everybody was blurred out.

[Lyle]

How was Saturday and Sunday though? I mean Saturday and Friday.

[Alden]

So Saturday. So Friday we just like went around to a bunch of the renegades and joined some of the like smaller little DJ areas. But that's when they had officially canceled it. But Saturday, we all had to pack up, and we're in Atlanta now. But for then, it was.

[Lyle]

For those who don't know, for those who don't know, Bonnaroo is a really great music festival that they have every year in Chattanooga, somewhere in Tennessee or in, like, Manchester. Yeah, Manchester, Tennessee. And I did some shows there, like, three years ago. It was a good time, I think. Unfortunately, I think the founder of it just passed away.

[Alden]

I think so. I think, like, last year they were talking about it and then. Yeah, we also. Me and my friend. You might have met my friend Brie in Miami. She went to your show in Miami and you guys hung out after.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I do remember your friend. Yeah, we went. Oh, wait, you're. Oh, wait, is that you?

[Alden]

Yeah, Bree's right next to me.

[Lyle]

Oh, shit. What's up, Bri? How you doing?

[Alden]

He said, what's up?

[Brie]

I miss you. We got. We gotta hang out soon in Miami.

[Lyle]

Yeah, we. We went to the. Me, your friend Bri and some of her friends. We went to the strip club after. I think I did a show.

[Brie]

This is Brie, actually.

[Lyle]

Yeah. Oh, it's upper. Yeah, we went to the strip club after. I think I did a show at the Miami Improv. Like, I don't know if this was. Yes, 2024, 2023. Brett. Shout out. The Gold Rush strip club. What a great.

[Brie]

Yeah. And you also performed there at one point. Didn't you have, like, a show where you went around and interviewed people?

[Lyle]

I went. Yeah, I went around and interviewed people there. They let me do that, which was cool. They have. It's funny because at that. So I think I'm at that strip club, like, when they have. They have this, like, LCD screen where they, like, if they have, like, a rapper. Because a lot of, like, rappers or whatever the fuck, like, go there, and if they have, like.

[Brie]

Remember, we saw Future.

[Lyle]

He was there. Yeah. So they have, like, rappers come there and shit. And so whenever they. It's like somebody's in the building or whatever, they. They say, like. Like, welcome Future on this, like, big LCD screen. And I. When I. When I was there, when I first went there to, like, do interviews, they had a picture of my face on the screen, and it said, welcome Therapy Gecko. And I took a picture and there was like. It's like, a picture. It's a picture of, like, welcome Therapy Gecko on this LCD screen. And then, like, a bunch of, like, strippers in the foreground. It looks really funny. It looks really fun. Yeah, I was like, I think this is the peak of my. Everything's been completely, utterly downhill since the then.

[Brie]

No, honestly, that's. That's how I felt when, like, I came up and saw you. I came by myself, if you remember. I drove like two hours to the show. It was last minute. I bought a ticket and I was like, you know what? I'm no one to go with, but I. I want to do something by myself for once. So I came to Miami, got a little Airbnb, came to your show, and what was really cool, I met. I met some friends with people at my table and everything. And then we went to a bar right next door afterwards. I remember. And that's when we seen you outside. And I came on stage. I was the first person you called up, which was awesome. Cool experience, of course. And then we went to the Trip Club.

[Lyle]

Wait, I. Oh, you know what? You know what? Yeah, okay, now I'm remember. I remember that because I thought. I'm remembering it. Like, you came with all these people and we all went. But no, you came alone.

[Brie]

I just made friends. Yeah, you came friends while I was there.

[Lyle]

Yeah. Yeah, you came alone. And then there was some other people there, and then we all went out. That was a good time. I like Miami's fun. Although Miami is.

[Brie]

It's a little crazy.

[Lyle]

It's a little crazy. Like, yeah, there's people.

[Brie]

Maybe that was the vibe.

[Lyle]

Well, there's people. Like, there's. What's the strip? Not. It's not strip club. It's like a club club. It's called like 1010 or some shit like that. It's like, I think live. I think it's called 1010. They're. They're parodying it in the new Grand Theft Auto game, but it's like, it's. It fucking. It's. Miami is a crazy city because, like, they'll be like a club that charges like $100 to get in, and the line for it is around the fucking block. And it's like, who are all these people paying $100 to get into a nightclub?

[Brie]

We. We tried to go to that one. It was like live nightclub or live nightclub, I can't remember, but it's like the 24 hour one. And we waited in that line in the same spot for so long, and we're like, you know what? We just got to go to a strip club or something. We got. We got to do something here.

[Lyle]

It was a fun time.

[Brie]

Yeah, that was. Dude, it was such a fun time. Do you ever. You ever play like, Fortnite or Do you have, like, Xbox or PlayStation? You play any kind of game?

[Lyle]

I play the Switch.

[Brie]

What do you play on Switch?

[Lyle]

Right now I'm playing. I just bought the Grand Theft Auto, the definitive edition. So I'm playing. I'm playing the. The San Andreas, the Grand Theft Auto San Andreas remake.

[Brie]

Oh, cool. Because I. I play it on Xbox sometimes, but I've been waiting for the new one to come out and I just seen that they pushed it back to like another year or something.

[Lyle]

They did, they did. I do. I do genuinely wonder if that game will, like, increase tourism to Miami. I think it. I think it might. I think it absolutely will.

[Brie]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

Like. Like, I have to imagine. I have to imagine that Rockstar is like working with the fucking, like Florida tourism board or so. They got to be doing something because there's no way. It's not gonna. I mean, actually, I mean, they're probably not, because I assume, you know, rock those games. Those games don't always paint extremely flattering portraits of. I mean, it's about. I mean, it's a game about. I mean. Yeah, I guess I take back everything I'm saying. They're definitely not working with the Florida tourism board on a game where you. Where you run around Florida killing everyone. Yeah.

[Weston]

Yeah.

[Brie]

You just go around Florida killing everyone, run them over. Yeah, probably. Probably not the best for tourism, I guess.

[Lyle]

Yeah. But it will. I probably assume it will increase. I wonder if. You know what, I wonder if that strip club that we went to is gonna be in the game, bro.

[Weston]

It.

[Brie]

And if it is, we definitely got to play together and go in it together like other characters. That'd be so cool.

[Lyle]

So who is your. Who. So you were here with. Hold on. Sorry, I lost track because I was talking to somebody else before. Is your friend, right?

[Brie]

Yeah, so that's. It's my best friend Alden and her and her boyfriend Jamal. They're from Alaska, so they flew from Alaska. And then you need to come to Alaska, she's saying. And then they came with Alden's roommate and her boyfriend Trent. So the four of them flew in from Alaska. I'm from Florida, so I drove to Atlanta. We all met in Atlanta, basically. And then we have our other best friend Megan and her boyfriend Evan, and they are from South Carolina, so they drove as well. We all met in Atlanta. That's kind of like our, like, meeting spot for Bonnaroo in a way. Just so we have like some time to, like, get ready for it, go shopping together, do whatever, do our last minute things, and then we all drove to Bonnie together. And then, like Alden was saying, it got canceled after us being there for two days, so we had to hurry up, pack our up yesterday morning. It was crazy. And then. Yeah. So we're back in Atlanta.

[Lyle]

What are you guys gonna do with your day now that your plans have changed?

[Brie]

So we're in Atlanta right now. Alden found an Airbnb yesterday morning for us, so we're going to stay here. We're thinking about going. So there's, like, a botanical garden, so we're probably going to take some mushroom chocolates, I guess, and, like, get a little. Get a little funny and, like, go look at the botanical garden. We also saw there's, like, some karaoke bar close by and a trap house museum. So there's a. There's so much to do here. We have so much planned. But. Yeah. So we're just. Honestly, we're all, like, super bummed from Bonnaroo, but we're all with, like, each other, which is the main part of what this was all about anyway, and being with our best friends. So we're living it up. I mean, we're living it up right now.

[Lyle]

I mean. Yeah, I think as you get older or. I mean, I don't know if it's an age thing. I mean, just in general.

[Brie]

Well, we're the same age pretty much. I'm 26 almost.

[Lyle]

Well, I was. I was just gonna say, like, why? What? The actual thing you're doing is less important than, like, who you're doing it with, but can I. Can I talk to Alden? Aldi Alden?

[Brie]

Oh, of course. You can talk to all the. Anytime. Love you. And listen, like I said, we should play some like. Or something together. That'd be a lot of fun.

[Lyle]

Maybe.

[Brie]

Yes. Maybe. We'll see. I'll message.

[Lyle]

Sorry, I just. I don't. I don't. I. I don't play online video. I only play one online video game. If I will play. If I just. I only play one online video game. I play Smash Bros. Melee Online and everything else I just do alone. So I didn't want to. And I don't want to sit. I don't want to sit here. I also. I don't like to lie. I don't want to be like, we should totally do that. And then knowing full. I'm not gonna say that to you, knowing full. Well.

[Brie]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

That I'm not gonna do that.

[Brie]

You don't have to make any promises. Okay. But. Because I'm kind of the same way, like, when I get home from work, I'll smoke and play, and then everyone keeps adding me, and I don't. I can't even talk at that point. Like, I just need to, like, go around and kill people on Fortnite.

[Lyle]

Yeah. Yeah. That's what I. I only play, man.

[Brie]

You know, So. I feel you.

[Lyle]

I feel you.

[Weston]

I'm.

[Brie]

I'm kind of the same way. But if anything, we can do, like, some. Some. No, Mic. You don't even have to talk. We can just, like, around and shoot the city up together.

[Lyle]

Well, it was good. It was good reconnecting with you, Brie.

[Brie]

Yeah, absolutely. It was great talking to you. I'll talk to you soon, I'm sure.

[Lyle]

Beautiful.

[Brie]

But here's Alden. Love you guys.

[Alden]

Hey, Lyle.

[Lyle]

Hey, Elder. I just wanted to. Because I know you called me, so I wanted to before, if I was gonna. I was gonna end the call, but before I did, I want. I didn't know if you had a specific thing that you called in to want to talk about.

[Alden]

No, honestly, I didn't even realize that. It was like. I didn't think that your voice would be this different over the phone, like people say, but it kind of is. So I kind of got a little starstruck for a second, and I had to pass it off to Brie to tell the situation. So now that I'm calm, I'm like. I just. We just wanted to tell you about Bonnaroo. We're all just hanging out in the backyard.

[Lyle]

Sweet, man.

[Alden]

Trying to figure out what to do.

[Lyle]

Well, yeah, I'm glad that you guys are enjoying life.

[Alden]

We are.

[Weston]

Yeah.

[Alden]

All friends together, hanging out. We only get to see each other, like, once, maybe twice a year. So this is the best time to do it.

[Lyle]

Alden. Right?

[Weston]

Yes. Yeah.

[Lyle]

Alden, is there anything else you want to say to the people. The computer, before we go?

[Alden]

Not so much for the people of the computer, but more like you. I want you to come up to Anchorage. We're up here, and I've been putting a lot of people on to you, so I really want you to be able to, like. I'll talk to a few people and see if I'm doing it. I want so bad.

[Lyle]

I've. I have fucking. Since 2022, I have fucking tried to. To do a. I want to do my live show in Alaska, but no Alaska. I. I'm on a big kick now of, like, I want to make travel videos. That's kind of like the. My. My main quest in life right now. And so I have. I Have a few on the docket. But yeah, Alaska is up there. So I'm definitely gonna. But I'm definitely gonna go to Alaska sometime soon. I don't know if I'll be able to do a show.

[Weston]

Yeah, we can't wait.

[Lyle]

Yeah, that'd be sick.

[Alden]

Or even just like. Yeah, let us know when you're coming up.

[Brie]

Cause that'd be cool.

[Alden]

Just like meet you. We could show you around a few different places. Check out like glaciers and swag.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I gotta know what's going on over there. I'm sure there's a lot of people going insane in Alaska.

[Alden]

I will say during the winter months people are definitely going insane. During the summer the sun is out most of the time. So a lot of people are feeling a lot better. Like seasonal depression wise and just have so much more energy because the sun just gives it to you, you don't even realize it.

[Lyle]

Well, thank you very much for calling Alden and good luck the rest of your entire life.

[Alden]

Thank you. Thanks for taking our call.

[Lyle]

Bye, Alden. All right, bye. Yeah, I, you know, I didn't want to lie to Bree because here's the thing. I have like, like I have people even like, like in my like real life or whatever who are like, oh, add me on the switch. And I'm like, no, I don't want to do. I only play. I'll it the best. I'll, I'll, I'll. I play people in melee. That's the only online game that I play. Everything else is like I'm sitting alone playing like I like, like linear story driven. We're gonna go from point A to point B. Shit, even I probably won't even play GTA 6 online when it comes out. I have no interest in whatever. I'm sure that, I'm sure that they're cooking up something big for GTA 6 online, but I have no desire to. I just want to be in the story mode. Although they're probably gonna do some fucking bullshit bullshit that everyone does now where like you have to be connected to the Internet to play the single player. That really pissed me off. Alright, okay. Do I have any other post call thoughts on this? I don't, I don't. Hello folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode. But get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week. That's right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming a premium member of Therapy gecko over at therapygecko.supercast.com Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes. They get a completely ad free podcast feed of the regular show. They get recordings from my live shows members only streams and they help support my ability to continue doing this podcast. So here's a clip from this week's members only bonus episode.

[Alden]

Find myself like mentally not being able.

[Pablo]

To do the things that I once.

[Weston]

Was able to do.

[Lyle]

That fucking guy is in you. The guy who loves I'm I want to grab you right now, Steve, and by the collar of your shirt and tell you that that guy is in you. Not I just I'm not even in like a crazy motivational whatever the fuck but because, and I'm saying this because I too have a have a have a boy within me. That sounds weird, but I have a boy within me who, who who deeply loves the earth. And I love and I love talking to people and I love life and doing things and going out and being around people and chatting with people and being really extroverted. Just I truly from personal experience want to grab you and say that that the motherfucker is still in there. If you want to hear this full conversation, you can sign up to become a premium [e-mail] or find the link in the episode description. That's therapygecko.supercast.com Alright, I have nothing else to say. Repeat.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags on items like Kraft Mac and Cheese, Celsius Energy drinks, Quaker Chewy Bars and sparkling ice flavored water. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Jemma Spaeg]

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[Ryan Seacrest]

And here we have a specimen from the early 2000s.

[Lyle]

A legacy investing platform.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Please don't touch the exhibit folks, it could crash.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Ready to step out of the Financial history [e-mail] you can invest in almost everything stocks, bonds, options and more. You can even put your cash to work at an industry leading 4.1% APY. Leave your clunky, outdated platform behind. Go to public.com and fund your account in five minutes or less. Paid for by Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC. Full disclosures at public.com disclosures add dry eye relief to your routine with Refresh Optive Mega 3, a lubricating eye drop.

[Lyle]

With a moisture rich, preservative free formula.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Enhanced with inactive ingredients like flaxseed oil and antioxidants. This formula supports all three tear film layers and provides advanced hydration to instantly moisturize and soothe dry eyes. Refresh Optiv Mega 3 is safe to.

[Lyle]

Use as often as needed so you.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Can make it part of your wellness routine. Find Refresh online or in the Eye Drop section at all all major retailers FSA and HSA eligible.

[Lyle]

This is an iHeart podcast.