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Therapy Gecko
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David
Hello?
Therapy Gecko
Hello? How's it going?
Chris
Pretty fucking chill, dude.
Therapy Gecko
Pretty chill. Why is it going pretty. Why is it going.
Chris
This is Lyle, right?
Therapy Gecko
Yes, sir. Who is this?
David
You can call.
Chris
I'm. I'm down to go by my former Smash Bros. Name, Stud with a Money sign.
Therapy Gecko
Okay. Stud with the Money sign. All right. You sent me a lot of texts. I'm gonna read all of them.
Chris
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
First of all, your name is. Your name is Chris. I might just end up calling you that. You said I'm Chris? I'm violently hungover at work right now. You sent me that about two months ago. Then you said, I've been crashing the fuck out for the past two months, got a haircut today and I'm ready To be a menace. Okay. And then you said, my name is Ganondorf. And then you said, anyone who mains Little Mac on Super Smash Brothers is a bitch. And then you said, I got sent to jail on Valentine's Day and I'm out now. So it sounds like you were a little bit too much of a menace. So let's. Okay, let's get into this here. So you said, I've been crashing the fuck out for the past two months. I got a haircut today. I'm ready to be a menace. What does that mean?
Chris
So, like, basically, like, when that was going on in my life, I was just being belligerently drunk on a regular basis and I was doing, like, a lot of cocaine because there was a lot of stuff going on with my. So I got two baby moms. My set. My first one, she doesn't. I can't see my son. She has a restraining order against me that I don't know if it's still standing because it got put on a temporary status. And then my second one is now withholding my son away from me. And that was a big contributing factor to, like, me constantly crashing out because she blocked me on everything. She doesn't bring my son over or anything anymore. And it just kind of, like, ultimately resulted in, like, me just crashing the fuck out on a. On a daily basis.
Therapy Gecko
All right, so you have two different baby mamas?
Chris
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
How old are you?
Chris
I'm 29. I'm turning 30 in July. July 4th, to be exact.
Therapy Gecko
Okay. Happy birthday. And how old are the kids?
Chris
So my first one, his name is Eros.
David
He's.
Chris
He turned three on January 22nd. And then my. My younger one, he's one and a half. His name is Aiden. He turns two on September 23rd.
Therapy Gecko
Okay. Okay. So these are recent kids?
Chris
Yeah, pretty, pretty recent.
Therapy Gecko
And. All right, let's start with the first one. Okay. I'm sorry, you mentioned one as a restraining order, and then the other one just blocked you. What's the deal with the other one?
Chris
So with the second one, we were kind of on and off a little bit, like maybe a year. We started dating a year after my first son was born, and we were kind of on and off since then. So for like, the past, like, two and a half ish years, we were on and off and when. And when we had gone back together at some point, I. I can't remember the exact timeline of it, but we got back together and then she ended up getting pregnant. So during that time, we. We stayed together. We were Doing everything together, like, living life. We got our own apartment. And then after we had the baby, a lot of the, like, the postpartum stuff, like, it got, like, out of hand, and she wasn't really aware of how to, like, address things. And it kind of. It went down, like, the path of, like, her pushing me away. I was doing everything for her, like, really trying my very best to, like, let her know, like, you can come home and talk to me. And ultimately, it just, like, boiled down to, like, her pushing me away. And I'd be up all hours of the night with the baby alone. And then it led to the point of, like, me cheating on her because I felt alone in the relationship. And when I cheated on her, I cheated on her with this girl, and she gave me HSV1. And I was unaware of it because I was asymptomatic. Yeah, I got HSV1 from her, and. And she. She told me, but I. I don't recall it because I was drunk and on a lot of drugs. So after I had slept with that girl, stepping out on my second kid's mom, I then gave it to her because I didn't know that I even had it. And then that from that point forward, like, the relationship completely, like, dwindled away. We broke up, and then we tried getting back together sometime later, and that was around, like, August of last year. And when we were together, the way she went about, like, trying to deem it as, like, me rebuilding my trust, it was like her policing me, me having to send her constant pictures of, like, where I'm at as I'm, like, commuting, like, from place to place where I'm staying, even though she has my.
Therapy Gecko
Wait, she took you? Wait, wait. I'm sorry. I'm getting all the. I'm getting all the people mixed up. She took you back?
Chris
Yeah, she had. So my.
Therapy Gecko
After she. Wait, after you gave her. After you gave her the hsv, she took you back?
Chris
Yes.
Therapy Gecko
Okay.
Chris
And. Well, so she didn't take me back. Like, we weren't officially together, but we were. At least to my knowledge. We were, like, exclusively talking to each other. But she never stopped talking to some of her exes while this, like, from last year was going on. So from August of last year to about December, she never stopped talking to, like, her exes. She would go through my phone. She will go through all my social media stuff and basically, like, police me into, like, proving, like, that I am only talking to her when she wouldn't reciprocate the same kind of, like, Transparency. And it's like, I get it, you know, because, like, I cheated on her. Like, now we both have this lifelong std. But, like, the. The way she conveyed her. Her emotions into that kind of stuff, like, made me, like, start going, like, crazy, like, because it drove me to a point of where, like, I had to prove myself to her. And I was, like, doing some, like, outrageous things that, like, I'm not proud of. And it. With time, it got worse and worse and just started, like, snowballing effect. Like, I would text her, like, I would send her, like, an insane amount of text messages, and I. And I'd be calling her an insane amount of times to let her know, in my fucked up way of thinking, that, like, this is how I'm proving to her that I'm only talking to her.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, Chris. Yeah, well, listen, Chris, do you speak to. Do you talk to a real therapist, man?
Chris
I. I did a long time ago, but that was, like, probably, like, in high school. And I. And so I've listened to your podcast for a long time, and, like, at some point how you're like, oh, like, Chat GPT is pretty great. I was like, all right, well, let me just start talking to Chad GPT about these kind of things.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, what did Chat GPT say?
Chris
I would talk to Chad GPT, like, saying, like, I'm feeling extremely anxious. Like, I want to, like, be continuously texting her, blah, blah, like, blowing her up, you know, and it was basically, like, calming me down and, like, telling me, like. Like, it provided a lot of, like, exercise, like, breathing exercises, or, like, it would suggest for me to, like, splash my. My face with, like, water and to, like, alleviate myself from all the anxiety and stuff like that, to prevent myself from going overboard and like, kind of blowing her up.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, so you said you. You went to jail on Valentine's Day, and did you just get out?
Chris
Yeah, Yeah, I got out on the 15th.
Therapy Gecko
All right, so you're there for a month. What. I mean, if you want to talk about it, what was up?
Chris
Oh, so. Okay. Also not a. Not another proudest moment. So, like, me being a medicine, like, constantly crashing out, like, it kind of, like, entails this because, like, I was drunk and I've. I've had, like, a really hard time, like, with drinking and stuff like that. So I got arrested on Valentine's day for a third DUI. My first one was when I was 21, and then my second one was last year, and the third one was on Valentine's Day. So on Valentine's Day, one of My buddies, we can just call him a gerbil. Gerbil was calling me like telling me about like the whole situation with his girl. He was all sad. So we, me, him and a couple friends, we went out and I was drinking. I had a, I had like a 12 pack of like the white cloth surges to myself. And then when we went out, I had like maybe like 7 or 8AMFs. The that blue drink, the audio says, you know, I, I, yeah, okay. And then afterwards, at some point in the night, I had just blacked the out and I came to in the driveway of my family's home because I, I moved back in last year and then I blacked out again and I came to in the driver's seat of my truck with a flashlight on my face. And as soon as that flashlight got to my face, I was like, I'm going to jail. Like, I'm, it's, that's it, I'm done. And so when I got into jail, excuse me, I thought I was in a burp. After the, on the 18th of February, I had my court date. I wasn't exactly too sure what to do, so I asked to speak to a public defender and then they had my court case set to the third of this month. And basically they tried giving me 16 months in prison with running my second and third DUI concurrent as a felony. And because I had signed a piece of paper agreeing to do 60 days in county jail for not doing my work release, I was able to use that in my like to, to not go to prison basically. So I did 60 days. But because each day in county is counted, is credited as two days, that's why I did a month.
Therapy Gecko
So listen, Chris, I'm, listen, I'm not a big, I'm not gonna sit here and be like, try to, you know, whatever, call you out or anything. I want this podcast to be helpful. I want this phone call to be helpful. So like, okay, so you're out of jail now and you got this restraining order. Like what? Like what's up man? Like what, what's the plan?
Chris
So my plan, cuz I thought I was gonna have my job when I came back out, so that didn't happen. I got fired. So now I've rebuilt my resume. I have been applying on Sundays. There's an AA meeting here in the next city over for me. So I'm gonna begin going back to AA because I went for like a couple weeks at some point in the past like three years and I thought I don't need this. But
Jon Jon
it.
Chris
It seems like, may be the best option because it, like what worse could happen is like, I don't like it. Like, it. I can't say that I didn't try it if I commit myself to it. So I'm gonna try and commit to it, and I'm just gonna keep going even if I don't like it.
Therapy Gecko
And so. Okay, so you. Your wife has a restraining order. His second wife. Wait, okay, so I'm sorry, I'm still trying to get your timeline right. So you had this kid, and then when did you have the second kid?
Chris
The first one was born in January 22, 2023. And then my second kid was born a 9. 23, 24.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, and you're not able to have contact with either of them?
Chris
The first one, I cannot at all until whenever the court decides to send the papers. Like, I've been waiting, I've been calling, and I can't really get any information about if that restraining order is still like, on a temporary status. If it is, then that completely terminates 100 visitations or anything with my first son. Just per the, like the stipulations and parameters set in the restraining order.
Therapy Gecko
Okay.
Chris
And then the second. Yeah, the second, the second one, she just has me blocked on everything. And I've been trying to have ask my. My mother if she can ask her to bring him or like, at least let him spend the night, but she just constantly provides like, he's sick. I'm not feeling good. And it's been that way since probably January. Like. Like as soon as the new year started.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, how's the drinking?
Chris
I haven't drank since I got out, and I. And I don't plan on it. When I was in jail, all I did was like, work out because I'm so in the county jail over here. Like, the Hispanics, they run a program basically. Like, it's just because we don't have anything else to do. So we. We get up at 6am, we work out for a couple hours. So being in jail for the past month, I just got into fitness. And now, I mean, I. I've been maintaining the workout that I do. And I'm surprised that I'm awake right now because I have a bed and my bed is pretty comfortable. So I'm probably still gonna get up at 6am, work out, and then continue applying. And then I need to fix my truck. So I'm just gonna maintain a life of fitness. And when I was in jail, I had started talking to this girl, like, maybe a Week before. And she's been extremely supportive of everything.
Therapy Gecko
Wait, wait, you started. Okay. A week before you went to jail, you. What, you matched with a lady on a dating app?
Chris
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
You matched with a lady on a dating app a week before you went to jail.
Chris
And.
Therapy Gecko
And did you. Did you go on a date before you met, before you went to jail?
Chris
Well, so, okay, so I live in.
Jon Jon
I'm.
Chris
If, if any. I'm just going to say where I'm from.
Jon Jon
It's.
Chris
It's totally cool. I'm from Shafter, so. In Kern County. And what state is that? California.
Therapy Gecko
Okay.
Chris
Yeah. So she. So she lives in San Luis Obispo by the Bay Area and. Or like, more like just like the.
David
The coast.
Chris
Like San Luis Obispo County. But she. She made the effort to, like, reach out to me in jail after I had my. My mom, because she asked me if I wanted her to grab my. My property, like, my phone and my wallet, and I was like, yes, please. I was like, call this girl and let her know I am not ignoring her. I'm just in jail.
Therapy Gecko
So, okay, you match with this girl on a dating app and you have your mom tell. Try to tell the girl. I'm sorry, I'm trying to. You said your mom?
Chris
Yeah, my mom.
Therapy Gecko
You have your mom tell this girl that you match with on a dating app. Sorry, my son is not ghosting you. He's just going to jail.
Chris
Yeah, like. Like, because I was already in there and she's like. And at this point, she had already figured it out that I was in jail. And then she went and made, like, an account to be able. So in. In the jail, we have tablets and we can message people if they paid for the account or whatever. And she went ahead and made it, like an e messaging account so she can message me on the tablet.
David
Dude.
Therapy Gecko
What? In jail, this is a girl that's known you for one week.
Chris
Yeah, but we. We met a long time ago because we used to work in the same city and. Yeah, like, we met a long time ago.
Therapy Gecko
So you didn't meet on the dating apps. You'd met a long time ago, but you reconnected on the dating app?
Chris
Yes.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, so how long had it been since you guys, like, why is she so. Like, why. Like, that's a lot. You know what I mean? Like, that's like. Did you guys have a strong relationship beforehand? Like, like all those years ago?
Chris
So we had only met, like, one time because. So she also has a kid and the. And her boyfriend at the time. I Worked with him and he invited me over and we just partied. And that was the only interaction I had with her. But when we rekindled on the. On the dating app, he 100% remembered me. And her entire life has, like 180. She doesn't party anymore, she doesn't do drugs. She's. She's an amazing mother. And she's like, her, her. Her mentality and like, the way she goes about things is like, extremely wholesome, like, just compassionate. And she's just like a very independent, strong woman that has like, just this attraction. I. I don't know. Like, to me, like, it seemed like it feels like she has feelings for me and. And she said it, but I didn't expect that because, like, we had just rekindled on a dating app. Like the. So we met back in 2017 and I was like, I was like, there's no way, like, like, this girl cares about me or like, even is worried about my well being because we only met once. We rekindled about almost 10 years later, and I'm in jail now for being an idiot.
Therapy Gecko
Dude. What? That's crazy.
Chris
Yeah. So, like, the fact that, like, she went the extra mile and, like, continued to talk to me and like, just like, like, not even, like, scold me in like a negative way, but, like, just talked me through it with, like, empathy and like, genuine care. I was like, I think I'm not gonna fuck this up again.
Therapy Gecko
Dude, that's crazy. Do you. Do you know what? What? So you went. You, like, did coke with this lady's boyfriend 10 years ago, and then she matches with you on a dating app and then gets a. And then like a couple days later gets a message from your mom saying, hey, my son's not ghosting you. He's in jail. Did she send you. Did she send that message on the phone or on the dating app? Is your mom, like, typing on Facebook dating for you?
Jon Jon
No.
Chris
No. So. So the way my mom contacted her, because my mom is not tech savvy at all, but she just. I gave her the passcode to my phone. I'm gonna completely out my passcode on. From my phone on this. And I. I told her. I was like. I was like. I told my mom, I was like, but the passcode to my phone is 69. 69. I was like. And this is how you spell.
Therapy Gecko
Never could have guessed that one, really. Outing yourself on the podcast.
Chris
Yeah. And if. If she. I, I sent her one of your episodes, so if she keeps up with the podcast. If. If at Any point, or if this gets anywhere or whatever, at any point, she will. She will hear my passcode. I'll probably end up telling her. But yeah, so my mom just called her from my phone because I wouldn't be able to sit there and explain to my. To my not tech savvy Hispanic mom how to navigate through an iPhone that she doesn't know how to use without a home button. And then to get to Tinder and then find her in my Tinder dm. So I just asked her to call her from my phone because I had her phone number.
Therapy Gecko
Did you have a phone number from tinder or from 10 years ago?
Chris
From Tinder.
Therapy Gecko
And then this girl has been. Dude, this is crazy. So what, like, okay, so you've been out for three days. Have you gone to see her?
Chris
No, because. So when. When they impounded my truck, whoever like, drove my truck into the. Onto the flatbed or whatever, they punched my clutch through the firewall so I can't even drive my truck.
Therapy Gecko
How far away does she live?
Chris
Like two hours.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, man. So what's the. Okay, Sorry, man. I'm trying to wrap my head around all this stuff. This is insane. Are you texting. Are you texting with her all the time?
Chris
Yeah, I. I just texted her as soon as you called me back that in cap locks, I'm on the. Wait, what did I say? I'm. I'm on the own with the therapy gecko because I. I misspelled phone.
Therapy Gecko
That's so funny. Okay, what's up with this lady's interesting to me, right? Because I have to be honest, I like. And though this isn't shade to this lady, but. Yeah, and it's not shade to this lady. It's not shade to you. But for this lady to be getting involved with a guy who, for lack of a better word, your life is in a bit of a fucked up situation right now, you know, like, for, you know, I think we both know this, her life must also be pretty fucked up right now for her to dive into this thing with you. Do you know what I mean? Like, what. What's going on with this lady where she's diving into this, like, jail relationship with a guy she met from her boyfriend doing Coke with him 10 years ago. Like, what's going on?
Chris
So right now it. Like that. That. That is an understandable like, like, way to see it. But like, she's doing pretty, pretty well off, honestly. Like, like, there's. I don't know why, but I am utterly grateful that she is diving into this life into my life because like my life is in a up situation and like hers, like, like, I mean, she lives with her family and I mean it's understandable in her area. Like rent is like $4,000 or 3,000, I think like average. But like she's pretty well off. Like she's, she's going to college, she has a, she has a great job, she's a great mother. Like, she, she's a very healthy mindset woman. And I'm just like, I'm like, what? Like, why me? Like, like I'm not, I'm not like trying to discourage you, but like, I'm just like, why me?
Therapy Gecko
Like, are you, are you handsome?
Chris
I don't think I'm like handsome, but like I have a lot of tattoos.
Therapy Gecko
Are you tall and skinny?
Chris
I am. Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, all right, well, I mean, that's good that you have that tall, skinny tattoos. That's a lot. That's a lot. That's a lot. Yeah, you can look, you can almost. There's plenty of people out there who are willing to look past three DUIs and jail time for tall skin, even tattoos.
Chris
And, and, and the two baby moms
Therapy Gecko
that and the two baby mamas.
Chris
Art. Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
How tall and skinny exactly are we talking here?
Chris
Okay, okay. I'm not even gonna like lie about it because I know people my height. So in the eyes of the, of the epitome of a tall king. I am a short king because I am 5 foot 11. I'm not lying.
Therapy Gecko
You're 5 foot 11?
Chris
Yeah, I'm 5 foot 11.
Therapy Gecko
Okay. I, that's way less baby mamas than I thought would be tolerated at 5 foot 11. Or way more about baby mamas than I thought would be tolerated at 5:11.
Chris
Yeah. Because I mean like it. If you're not 6ft or taller, like you're a short king. And it like if I wore my boots, like, like I'm just living a lie. Like, it's like, it's like I'm living the imposter syndrome.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, so. Dude, man, this is crazy. So I, alright, so I guess what, what do we want for you? Right? You clearly, like, if your life was a movie of some kind, this woman over the, this, this magical Tinder rekindling woman would be the, would probably be the love interest of the movie. And if the movie had a happy ending, you'd get to reconnect with your children. You'd ride away with your lady and her son. You'd have a nice, you know, daughter. Daughter right away with her daughter.
Chris
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
You know, you quit drinking, you'd put on, like, a white shirt or something like that. Like, you wanna. You want. You want some version of a happy ending for yourself, right? So what? And right now it's like, okay, okay, you got out of jail, you've been sober for a month. You've proven to yourself that you can at least do it for a month. If you can do it for a month, you can do it forever. So what's between just knowing you and knowing your life better than I know you and then I know your life? What's between you and that happy ending?
Chris
Honestly, it's being in this town. Because when I lived, like, away from, like, the people who condone and, like, enable, like, the bad behavior and, like, the. The bad influences and stuff like that. Because, like, every. Almost every person in this town that, like, I'm friends with, like, like, my. My old. My. My old drug dealer lives down the street, two of them lived on the same block. And. Okay, like, I. I just think, like, completely, like, cutting myself off from, like, a majority of these people that enable and, like, condone to, like, drinking and driving and stuff like that. Like, I think it's ideal to just kind of, like, cut them off because I've been in plenty of situations where, like, even after my second dui, excuse me, I thought I had a burp again. But, like, I'd be put in a position where, like, somebody would be a little too, too, too drunk, like, a little more drunk than I am, and then I'd get asked to drive. And the person asking me to drive there, I can't drive. And I'm like, well, I can't drive either. And then I'm just like, you know what? Fuck it. Like, I'll just drive. I have drugs on me. I'll just do a bunch of drugs right now, and then I'll be sobered up a little bit.
Therapy Gecko
So normally I'll say this to that point. I think a lot of people will tell you, like, oh, you can't blame the people around you, and. And you can't. But I do think that there's a lot of. Validity to your point that, like, the community that you're in and the people you surround yourself in are actually genuinely extremely important for, like, the kind of person that you become. So, you know, you can't really, like, blame your friends for, like, enabling your, like, stuff that you're doing. But I think you got the right sentiment going that you should find a new environment, not just a place, but people as well, who like share your desires and sentiments to stop like making crazy ass decisions. I think AA is a good thing for that. I think, you know, however you can. Yeah. Kind of build a new community that won't be like, where it won't be so easy to do the. That you're doing. And they'll be looking at it and going like, you know what the more than like, yeah, this is totally normal and cool.
David
Yeah. Yeah.
Chris
Because like in the, in the community that I'm in, like the community of friends that I have, like that like that is just a normal thing. So it's like to everyone in my circle of friends, like, they're like, oh, like it's no big deal. Like, just an example, like two of my longest friends that I've known here, like these two dudes, they've been hanging out for like the past like 15ish years on a daily basis and they put down about a 20 pack to 30 pack a day.
Therapy Gecko
Whoa.
Chris
Yeah. Like, like it is extremely, like just a normal thing to like put down just multiple cases in a day. Like there's nothing to do in this town. Like we live in Bum, basically nowhere. We're surrounded by orchards. Like, there's drug dealers everywhere. And like, if I go to the next city over like 20 minutes south, I end up in Bakersfield. And I used to be like, in high school, I was like, really big in like the Super Smash Bros community over here. And like, I would help like coordinate like with local tournaments and like at my mom's house, like, I think we had Mewtwo King come over one time.
Therapy Gecko
Shut up. You had Mewtwo King at your apartment, at your house once?
Chris
It. It was some MLG guy. I can't remember exactly who his name was. And my friend that helped coordinate all these Super Smash Bro tournaments, he's competed in EVO for the Super Smash Bros. Competition.
Therapy Gecko
Dude, I just had a weird moment just now. Can I tell you where you're 29? And you were like, yeah. When I was in high school, I was helping organize Super Smash Brothers tournaments and dude, I genuine. Dude, I just had a genuinely crazy moment in my head. I was like, wow, this guy must be fucking old or. No, no, no, no, no, no, it wasn't, it wasn't that. It wasn't that. It was like, no, no, it's not actually. I'm sorry. That's how I said that. This guy must be fucking old. I was like, huh? What do you mean you were doing it in high school? That was like Super Smash Brothers was popping, like kind of recently. And then I remembered that I'm about your age and I also organized super Smash Brothers tournaments when I was in high school. And I'm like, oh, fuck, I'm getting fucking old now.
Chris
Yeah, we're pushing 30, dude.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah. Damn. I was like, wait, that, that was like two years ago and we're not. It just. It didn't make any sense to me. The math.
Chris
Yeah, not.
Therapy Gecko
Was not mathing, but. Yeah. That's funny, huh? Okay. All right, so the point. So why don't you get back into Smash Brothers, man? It's still around.
Chris
Okay, so funny enough, I still have my CRT tv. I have like three gamecubes, and I have all the characters unlocked on Melee. And I have every page, every pot, every moth piece of. I'm outside, there's a moth. But like, I have every. I have every. Damn it. What are the words I'm thinking of? Like, I, I could get back into, but like, I don't know if the Kern county community like, really dabbles in like, melee anymore.
Therapy Gecko
Huh? Okay, well, maybe not Melee, man, but like just. But something like, whatever. It's Smash Ultimate. Just something. Something where you can show up regularly and like, be a part of society. Because that's what I think is you want to get your kids back, I assume.
Chris
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, so you. I think the first step to like, this, this fairy tale happy ending that we're talking about is just like finding your way back to being a well rounded human being where you feel like. When you are like, where you feel like you can be judged as worthy of like, being back in everyone's life. And I totally, I totally, totally think that that is achievable for you. I think everything is there, right? But I think like, you got to kind of do this mental mapping out of like, what are the steps, what are the steps of like, of like, just being able to like, look around and be like, I have a healthy life. I don't feel like my emotions are running amok. I'm not, you know, the drugs aren't running amok. The, the. The mania is not running among. Like, I'm just like a healthy, normal fucking dude and I'm ready to be a boring dad. It's like, how do you get there? Because that's the first step. It was like the internal work of being like, all right, I'm worthy to like, have my kids back, be a good, you know, whatever, boyfriends, stepdad, whatever it is you want to be to this, this, this new. This Old, new, old flame person.
Jon Jon
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
You know, so basically you just want to mentally map out, like, how are you gonna get there, you know?
Jon Jon
Yeah.
Chris
Like it like to me, because like a little. I. Correct me if I'm using this term wrong, but I've heard younger people say that this is a lore drop. And I mean that with complete genuinity, that I'm not sure if I'm using the term correctly.
Therapy Gecko
But this is a large. Yes, we are. We're getting a lot of lore about you.
David
Okay, cool.
Chris
I. I'm young and hip now, but like, I've been like, I. So I started smoking cigarettes and weed when I was like 10, 11 years old. And I've been drinking since I was about like 12. And this is probably like the first time like I. I've had like short bursts of like being sober in the past, but like nothing like more than a month. And I've never thought like being sober for more than a month would be at all achievable in life because like, I'm outside, there's a bunch of cops going on. I don't know why.
Therapy Gecko
That's okay, keep going.
Chris
But I never thought it'd be like an achievable feat in life because like, it just seemed like the normal thing and like, like. Do you know the band Motley Crew?
Therapy Gecko
I've heard of them.
Chris
Okay. Nikki Six, they have a documentary called the Dirt. And growing up like dad's been gone, mom worked two full time jobs to like keep a roof over my head with my brother. And so. So she wasn't exactly absent, she was just working all the time because that's what she had to do. And there's a quote from Nikki Six in the movie, except not. It's not exactly verbatim that I, I feel the same way because it's not. It wasn't my preference of drug, but it like the camera pans out from the outside of his mansion and like it slowly comes in and like it goes to him and his tidy whitey's like basically on the verge of overdosing from heroin. And he says, I've never felt a motherly love until I met her and her name was Heroin. And to me, like that completely resonated with me because like alcohol and like drugs and substance abuse was like, it was a. It was an easy thing to turn to.
Therapy Gecko
Sure.
Chris
As a kid.
Therapy Gecko
Sure.
Chris
And so like now like, I'm just like, fuck, like I'm sober, like, I'm not feeling like shit all the time. Like, how do I Maintain this, like, because getting sober is easy, but staying sober is the hard part.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, yeah, of course. How do you maintain it? I guess one day at a time, man. That's what they say, right?
Chris
Yeah, like, and like, cuz I, I used to be like super into skateboarding and stuff like that. Like, like I, I was all in a. Doing death metal vocals as like a teenager and playing Super Smash Bros. So like now I'm like, like, I, I can, I can do the Super Smash Bros part. Skateboarding might be a little bit out of the question. I don't want to break an ankle or if I do skate, just like, be careful.
David
Mm.
Chris
But like, I, and like, and I'm like rediscovering a lot of things about myself again because like, it's been so long of like, not being sober at all and like, understanding who I am anymore as a person is like, like, what do I even enjoy? Like, do I enjoy those things anymore? So like, this is a whole new
David
adventure, the whole new world.
Therapy Gecko
It is a whole new adventure. Well, I'd look at, Listen, at least you're going on the adventure, right? I mean, we have a, we have guys calling to this podcast who have similar problems and are kind of, they're actually a step behind. They're actually a step or two behind where you are. Where they, they actually don't even believe that there is an adventure to go on. Right? Yeah, like, that in and of itself is a important thing. The fact that you're like, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna walk this road. I'm gonna do this thing. I know what I have to do, and I'm gonna fucking do it. Versus like, oh, there's no hope. I'm a piece of shit, I should die. You know, all these crazy thoughts. So, so look, man, I think like, staying sane is just a thing you have to try to do every day. And so, I don't know, I'm, I'm kind of talking a little bit of nonsense here. I appreciate you sharing all this stuff with us, but I, I, I think just like, staying sane is just something you just kind of have to try to. Being an adult is just like, you wake up, you try again, you know, you fucking just keep trying. So that's, that's what you just do, man, is keep, keep, keep trying to not drink and not kill yourself. That's, that's the best way to do it.
Chris
You saying the whole like, keep trying thing, it, I'm gonna shout out my favorite book right now. It's called A Million Little Pieces by James Frey. And what you said just completely reminded me of what the author says in the book, because, like, it's about him going to rehab and, like, him struggling, like, to maintain sobriety, even in rehab, and, like, all the emotional, like, difficulties that he has to navigate and everything. And. And he. He says in the book, whatever it takes, just hold on. Just keep holding on is what he says.
Therapy Gecko
Do you know that book got, like. You know, that guy got in a lot of trouble for. Because he made the book up, right?
Chris
Did he?
Therapy Gecko
Oh, you didn't know about any of that?
Chris
No, I didn't.
Jon Jon
Wow.
Therapy Gecko
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I thought you knew. Wait, you didn't know about this?
Chris
No. Wait, wait. What did he get in trouble for?
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Therapy Gecko
You're okay. You're a skateboarding super Smash Brothers guy. You watch south park, don't you?
Chris
Not. Not really, but, like, I do.
Therapy Gecko
You've never seen. Dude, you said you've. You don't really like South Park.
Chris
No, no, I. I do like it, but I don't really watch it. Like, I. I don't have whatever streaming platform it's on.
Therapy Gecko
Okay. Streaming platform? Dude, we. You're like. You watched on, like, the TV that you play Melee on. Anyway, do you. Have you seen this episode of south park called A Million Little Fibers?
Chris
No, wait, hold on. You said it's A Million Little Fibers?
Therapy Gecko
Yeah. I'm so sorry that I have to do this to you, but, yeah, there's a South park episode called A Million Little. You know. Towely, Right?
Chris
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, so. So they make. Basically, in the. In that episode, they make fun of this book. Pauli writes a memoir, and he, like, goes on Oprah, and then Toweley gets in trouble because it turns out he made up a lot of his memoir, and they're basically parodying this book.
Chris
I, I, I. I am reading the little summary on Google as. As you said it. And I see Tali sitting next to Oprah.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, but this is. But this. It's based off of a real thing with the real author where he got in trouble for making up that book. I'm sorry to do this to you. When you said that this is the. I'm so sorry. You're like. You're like. This is the most inspiring quote from my favorite book. It keeps me going every day, and I'm like, Turns out. I'm like, you know it's all a fraud, right? Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut.
Chris
Yeah, I'm gonna DM this on Instagram, I swear to God.
Therapy Gecko
Are you reading about it right now?
Chris
I, I, I'm gonna take a screenshot of Tali. I'm gonna take the picture of Tally with the mustache and a little. I'm, I, I'm blanking on the investigator's name. Like the famous investigator who had the corn cob pipe.
Therapy Gecko
Sherlock Holmes.
Chris
Yeah, his Sherlock Holmes hat. I'm taking this picture and I'm just sending it to James Frey on Instagram. He will probably never see it because now his book is fake.
Therapy Gecko
Damn.
David
It's okay.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, Large part. Yeah, there we go. A million little pieces. After a six week investigation, the Smoking Gun published an article saying that they described fabrications and Frey's account of his drug abuse experiences, life and criminal record. Frey responded to the claims saying, I've never denied I've altered small details. I stand by the book as being the essential truth of my life. Then he appeared on Oprah again, and this time he said that the same demons that had made him turn to alcohol and other drugs had also driven him to fabricate crucial portions of his memoir. So listen, so listen, listen, actually, I'm gonna. You know what? Let's do this. Let's do this. Chris, you said your name was. Yeah, Chris, I think you could if you really want to. I think you can still find inspiration in James Frey because, Because James Frey, what he did was he, he did, he did your version of getting a haircut and being ready to be a menace, which is he got really fucked up and wrote a fake memoir, which sounds like something you might do if you got really fucked up. And we're doing a bunch of crazy stuff so you can still see yourself in this guy.
Chris
Yeah, yeah, that, that's not far from true. Damn, I already sound like him. Far from true.
Therapy Gecko
All right, well, anyway, sorry for ruining this book for you.
Chris
Okay, now I need to tell, tell my, my lady about this. Hopefully it doesn't ruin her.
Therapy Gecko
Chris, keep trying. Keep doing your thing. Thank you for sharing all this stuff about yourself. I appreciate your vulnerability as always. Was this helpful for you? Was this a good conversation to have?
Chris
Oh, yeah, 100% it is. Okay, 2, 10 in the morning right now, and I'm just gonna shout out shopper in Shafter, California. I, I honestly didn't expect you to call me because I, I tried calling like five times before you had called and I was like, I, like, I'm just gonna keep watching Animal Kingdom on my silly little iPad and, and then I saw A call. And I was like, I know this number. I was like, I'm gonna answer this. I don't even have to ask who it is.
Therapy Gecko
Well, Chris, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
Chris
If any of you guys play Little Mac, you suck. I don't care. Find me.
Therapy Gecko
Thanks, Chris.
David
Also.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, yeah, go ahead.
Chris
Also, if anyone knows about the Kern County Smash Bros. Page that started at my mom's house when I was 16.
Therapy Gecko
Thank you for calling, Chris.
Chris
Thanks. I'll have a good night. Wait, wait, wait. I have one last question that I really wanted to ask before. Before you let me go.
Therapy Gecko
Go ahead.
Chris
If I take my son, as soon as I get a chance to go to one of your shows, if I take him in a baby gecko costume and take a sword, can you knight him into the Geck Nation on video for me, please?
Therapy Gecko
Listen, you. I don't. If you just get it, like, if you just got your custody back, you don't want to be doing child abuse like that.
David
Okay, that's fair.
Chris
What if it's like a. Like a styrofoam sword?
Therapy Gecko
Bringing a child to my show is abuse of everyone else who came. Actually, I think they're. I mean, they shouldn't be. Oh, they should be like. I think all the shows are, like, eight. I think there's been, like, some, like, maybe teenagers who've come to the shows but never, like, holds your son. He's like, one, two,
Chris
one and a half, and another one's three.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, they're gonna have a bad time.
Chris
I'll just be outside the venue.
Therapy Gecko
If you really want to stand outside of the venue with your kid, I'll. Yeah, I'll. I'll knight your child.
Chris
Yeah, I'm gonna. I'm gonna do everything in my power so that way he can be get ignited into the Geck nation. Thanks, Law. Love you, dog.
Therapy Gecko
Thank you, Chris. I appreciate you. Good luck, man.
David
Thanks, man.
Chris
Have a good night.
Therapy Gecko
That was Chris. If you're three years old and you're listening to this podcast, I would appreciate if you stayed home from the live shows. If you're above the age of 18, I think in Canada, 16, some places, unfortunately, 21. But if you're reasonably an adult, then you should come to the show therapygeckotour.com to get tickets. And many places around the universe. Actually, you know what? Fuck it. If you're three years old and you're listening to this podcast, like, on your own, right? Like, if you're three years old, and somebody else is listening to this podcast near you, this doesn't count. But if you're three years old and you managed to go to Spotify, click on the podcast and you're like actually genuinely listening, you can come. Oh yeah, you can come. If you. If you're like an actual genuine listener and fan of the podcast and you're three years old, then, you know, go for it. We all need a little help sometimes, and quitting nicotine can feel like a big challenge X Program by Truth Initiative has your back from the very start. When you're doing something as tough as quitting nicotine, support can make all the difference. In fact, support is proven to help you quit. So get a leg up on your quit journey with help from X program, a free 24. 7 tool for quitting nicotine. It brings people together who share a common goal quitting and staying Quit become one of millions to use its free, confidential and 24. 7 support community. Inside there's real connection. Members can answer your questions about quitting, cheer you on, and support you through tough moments. It can make a real difference. So much that 93% of members would recommend it to family and friends who are trying to quit. Plus, there's guidance every step of the way. You'll get expert advice, text support, and a personalized quit plan, all for free. Visit exprogram.com to explore X program's community for free. Today.
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Therapy Gecko
Hello?
Jon Jon
Yo, what's up, dude? Is this the. Is this the therapy gecko right now?
Therapy Gecko
Yes sir, this is the therapy gecko right now. And who is this right now that I am speaking to?
Jon Jon
Oh, dude, my name is Jonathan. Jonathan. But I go by Jon. Jon.
Therapy Gecko
Jon. Jon. I like that. That's cute. Did somebody give you that name or did you give it to yourself?
Jon Jon
Yeah, no, my friend from like elementary gave me that name in like first rate and then after that I just like stuck with it.
Therapy Gecko
John. John, I. I have to ask you, are you okay? Because you sound. You sound like you just woke up.
David
No problem.
Jon Jon
I'm fucking faded off. Inedible.
Therapy Gecko
You're faded off? Inedible?
Jon Jon
Yeah. And I saw your story and I was like, bro, I gotta call this dude right now.
Therapy Gecko
Inedible. What? I'm just kidding. John. John, what are you doing right now that you're faded off of inedible?
Jon Jon
Dude, I was like, I was taking some notes and then I was setting ahead of bed and I saw your story and I had a call.
Therapy Gecko
You were taking notes on what?
Jon Jon
Astronomy. For astronomy. Because I have an exam tomorrow.
Therapy Gecko
So you are up at what, two o' clock in the morning?
Jon Jon
Oh no, it's. I mean like Kelly. So like 12am okay, you're up at
Therapy Gecko
12am and you are faded off in edible Studying the universe. What was the most interesting thing that you learned about the universe in your notes that you wrote down?
Jon Jon
That's a good one. I'm going have to like look back at them because it's pretty cool.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, you should know this. This could be on the test. What's the coolest thing about the universe that could be on the test? Do you normally get faded when you study for a test?
Jon Jon
No, this is my like first time.
Therapy Gecko
And is it making you better or worse?
Jon Jon
In between?
Chris
In between?
Jon Jon
Like terrified.
Therapy Gecko
Yes, I'm here.
Jon Jon
But how's your night going though?
Therapy Gecko
How's my night going?
Jon Jon
Yeah,
Therapy Gecko
I'm actually, I'm in Tokyo right now, so. It's 5pm oh yeah, that's right. I'm here talking to you. But anyway, listen, listen. Who cares about any. Who cares about anything? John, John, is there a particular reason why you called?
Jon Jon
I don't know. I just wanted to give it a shot because I tried calling you before when you posted, like, when you post about it.
Therapy Gecko
Okay.
Jon Jon
And to be honest, I didn't really think I was gonna be able to, like, talk to you.
Therapy Gecko
So, Jonjan, how's your life going as a whole? I know you have this test tomorrow. I mean, but outside of that, how's everything going?
Jon Jon
It's going all right. Like, I've been, like, low key, tweaking out about school, and I feel like it's kind of not for me at times.
Therapy Gecko
That is not for you. What is causing you to tweak out?
Jon Jon
Like, I just, like, can't get, like, in the mindset to, like, care about it, if, like, that makes sense, you know?
Therapy Gecko
Do you care about anything?
Jon Jon
My girlfriend and skateboarding.
Therapy Gecko
Wow, that's pretty sweet. How long have you been with your girlfriend, dude?
Jon Jon
Six years, seven this year.
Therapy Gecko
Really? You sound young.
Chris
Yeah,
Jon Jon
yeah, I'm like. I turned 20 a few months ago.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, fuck. You've been with her since you were 13?
Jon Jon
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
How did you guys meet? Like, in class and middle school.
Jon Jon
Middle school? Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was like, the new. The new girl in my class, and I was like, yo,
Therapy Gecko
how you. You were like. She was the new girl in your class and you were like, yo.
Chris
Yeah, like, yo.
Jon Jon
Because, like, I kind of knew. Knew her because she was a pretty tall girl. I was like, a pretty short kid.
Therapy Gecko
And how long have you been skateboarding for?
David
Cool.
Jon Jon
I've been skateboarding since I was in, like, seventh grade, so like, maybe like. Like six or seven ish years.
Therapy Gecko
Can you do a kick flip?
Jon Jon
Yes.
Therapy Gecko
Can you do a tray flip? That's the real question. Okay. Was your. Does your girlfriend. Is your girlfriend attracted to the skateboarding skills? No, no. Is she active? Does she actively find them childish?
Jon Jon
Oh, no, no, no. I show her my clips sometimes.
Therapy Gecko
Really?
Chris
Yeah.
Jon Jon
I'm like, yo, look at this.
Therapy Gecko
And is.
Jon Jon
She did my.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, go ahead, go ahead.
Jon Jon
Sorry, sorry. No, no, I didn't mean to cut you off.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, I was gonna say. So you. You show her, like, clips of you. Like, you. You clear, like, a set of stairs?
Jon Jon
Yeah, yeah.
Therapy Gecko
And then. And then you show her the video of it?
Jon Jon
Yeah, I did my first ten stare and I had her with me for it and she recorded it.
Therapy Gecko
Okay. All right. So she's supportive.
Chris
Yeah.
Jon Jon
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
That's nice.
Jon Jon
It was like a pretty mental battle. Like, the tents There and then, like, I finally had the courage for it to, like, do it. And I was pretty stoked then.
Therapy Gecko
Have you ever fucked yourself up doing any of this? Like, broken any bones?
Jon Jon
No, thankfully not. Just like, rolling my ankles. Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
And you said that school's not for you. What is for you then? What do you want to do with your life? You're a pretty young guy. Do you have thoughts about how you want to spend your days on the Earth?
Chris
I don't know.
Jon Jon
That's why I was kind of, like, worried about school. Like, like, like tweaking out about it because, again, I don't know what I want to do. And then, like, school feels like it has that guide towards where I can be, but I just, like, feel like, I don't know, like school isn't for me. And then without school, I can't have a sense of direction of where I'm going in life.
Therapy Gecko
What do you study?
Jon Jon
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
Astronomers?
Jon Jon
No, I know psychology.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, yeah. Okay. It's an interesting conundrum. I gotta be honest with you, man. You know, it's tough to be like a young, like 18 to 20 year old right now because you're going into a. The world gets kind of rapidly, exponentially more uncertain every year. So you're going into a bit of an uncertain universe. But there are still certain constants to the universe that remain. Do you have a job of any kind? Do you make money in any way?
Jon Jon
Yeah, I have two jobs.
Therapy Gecko
What are your two jobs?
Jon Jon
I work at Ross and then I work at this pokey place with my girlfriend.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, you work at the poke place with your girlfriend?
Jon Jon
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
Okay, how. Okay, if your life is exactly the same right now when you're like, 30, would you be happy with that? Genuine question.
Jon Jon
No. Like, if I'm like, exactly where I'm at right now like that?
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, if you're exactly where you're at right now, you're working a couple jobs, skateboarding, hanging out with your girlfriend.
Jon Jon
Probably, like, fine if, like, I'm able to manage, but, like, if I don't have, like, an actual career. Probably not. Yeah. Because I kind of thought about, like, switching it, but I'm already, like, two years deep into this.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, what the fuck? You know, you're not. Let me say something. You're not too deep into anything.
Jon Jon
You're.
Therapy Gecko
You're in your infancy of existence, I think.
Chris
Oh, yeah.
Therapy Gecko
I mean, you're in your. You're. You're in your infant. You're not in your infancy of existence, but you're in your career. Infancy.
Jon Jon
Yeah.
Chris
Yeah.
Jon Jon
Because I kind of. I thought about switching it to, like, something like, with mechanics, I feel like there's always gonna be, like, some type of work there.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, I. I think two years of college is a little too early to be subscribing to the stock. The sunk cost fallacy.
Jon Jon
Yeah, I see. I see.
Therapy Gecko
Dude, you sound. I feel like I'm keeping you up, man.
Jon Jon
No, no, I don't mind, though.
Therapy Gecko
All right.
Jon Jon
I'm lucky. Like, pretty stoked to, like, be talking to you.
Therapy Gecko
I feel pretty stoked to be talking to you, too, man. I didn't know that, like, there's There were still guys out there who were chill like that.
David
For real.
Therapy Gecko
For real.
Chris
Yes.
Jon Jon
Thank you, Therapy Gekko.
Therapy Gecko
Jon Jon, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
Jon Jon
Hope you guys have a good ass. Night.
Therapy Gecko
Swag.
Jon Jon
And. Oh, I recently started living. Like, Try living every day like it's my last. Like, I tried putting a bit more effort. Everything I do, I think everyone should do the same and. Yeah, well, you can't be good, though.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, you have a. You have a good one. John John. God bless you. See you around the universe, man.
Jon Jon
Hope to see you around.
Therapy Gecko
That was Jon Jon. He's about to sleep for. I don't know. I don't know what John John's deal is. He was an interesting guy. He was very sleepy. He sounded a little.
David
A little.
Therapy Gecko
A little, like, whacked out, but maybe in a nice way. You can't really live your. You can't really live every day like it's your last. Because if today was my last day on Earth, I would probably do more drastic things. You know, I'd spend every dollar I had. I'd probably commit at least a couple crimes, right? Like, ones that are victimless. Like, you know, I don't know, like, steal stuff from, like, a Walmart. Although I. No, I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't go to Walmart on my last day. I probably talk. I probably hang out with my family and friends. No, I wouldn't commit any crimes. There's no real crimes I want to commit. I'd like to commit tax fraud, but if you're. If it's your last day on Earth, there's no point in committing tax fraud, because what's the point of. Pay your taxes. Don't pay your taxes. You're gonna die, you know? So I'm a little off track, but. Yeah. Thanks, Jean. John. Anyone who's ever tried to quit nicotine knows it takes more than willpower to make it stick. That's why X Program by Truth Initiative is with you from the start, because when changes are worth making, every minute counts and you don't play around with your time. Quitting nicotine isn't easy, but can be more successful with a plan. That's where X Program comes in. It's a free quitting tool built to help you outsmart nicotine. Built on proven methods, its science backed approach can increase your odds of quitting by up to 40%. When you need support, X Program is always there. You'll get 24. 7 Advice via text message and community support. Whether you're thinking about quitting for the first time or are a seasoned quitter, X Program tailors a personal quit plan to meet you where you're at. Quit smarter, not harder, with X program. Visit exprogram.com to learn more and join for free when you're ready.
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Therapy Gecko
hello?
David
Hello, is this Lyle?
Therapy Gecko
Yes sir. Who's this?
David
Holy moly.
Chris
This Is.
David
We'll go with David.
Therapy Gecko
David, David, David and Goliath. Camp David. That's where the president goes to eat bread. David Copperfield, famous magician. Not sure what he's up to these days.
Chris
Me neither.
Therapy Gecko
David Schwimmer, one of the popular Friends actors. He played one of the friends. He's your friend? He's my friend. He's everyone's friend.
David
Nice. I wish I could think of a David.
Therapy Gecko
Yeah. Throw it in. Throw anyone in. I tried to do this with someone else. They want to do it. Just give me anyone. Give me anyone.
David
Is it. I don't know. I'm David. I guess for today.
Therapy Gecko
He fucking. He did the same thing. It doesn't even have to be. It doesn't even have to be a David.
David
Come on, give me something David isn't dj.
Chris
Known.
Therapy Gecko
DJ anyway. Anyone? Anything. It doesn't. Any dj. Dj.
Chris
Dj.
Therapy Gecko
Howie Mandel.
David
I don't know, man. I. I really. I don't even know about David right now. I'm dating.
Therapy Gecko
Listen, it doesn't have to be anyone. Howie Mandel. Do you work. Give me the name of somebody that you work with.
David
The name of someone who I work with, like, right now.
Therapy Gecko
Yes. Yes, right now.
David
I don't work with a David.
Therapy Gecko
Oh, my God. It doesn't have to be a David. Just like Harry Potter. Come on. Something, someone, anyone, anything. Just say stuff. It doesn't. We're gonna. It's gonna be fun. Everything's. I don't know what I'm doing right now. Oh, Ellen DeGeneres. Do you know Ellen?
David
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's.
Therapy Gecko
She's matter in the universe. She's matter in the universe. No, no. We're beyond. David. We're in the realm of everything. We're in the universe right now.
David
What's she up to?
Chris
The universe.
Therapy Gecko
What is she up to these days? She's playing. She's in finding Dory 2.
David
Dory. I don't know, man.
Therapy Gecko
Who cares? Who cares about anything?
David
David cares. Who cares?
Therapy Gecko
Who cares?
David
Wow. I can't. I can't believe I'm talking to you. That's crazy. You're like. You're in Japan right now, aren't you?
Therapy Gecko
Dr. Phil. He's something. David, what is it?
David
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
That made you want to call me today, man?
David
Well, I'm camping in the back of my car right now in Seattle. I'm not from Seattle, but trying to sleep. But I can't really sleep. I called you, like, 20 times. I'm a little. A little under the influence of some substances. To help me fall asleep. I was like, let me call Lyle one more time. But hell, like, we're here, we're here now. So. That's sick.
Therapy Gecko
What is it that is making it so that you are in your car right now?
David
Well, I think just to, I don't know, just to save a little money. Got another. Sorry, another trip next week to go drive down to San Diego. I'm in the PNW obviously, but not from Seattle. But I've came coming up here for the day. We got shitty days off, got Tuesdays and Wednesdays off, but trying to make the most of it, you know.
Therapy Gecko
What do you do on these shitty Tuesdays and Wednesdays, as you call them?
David
Try to do as much as I can. I'm really trying to meet more people. But, you know, actually I'm very grateful to all the people I've met so far on these Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Um, met some really great people who are willing to come hang out with me and make the effort to hang out with me on my terrible days off, though they have the weekends off, you know, But I'm, you know, just trying to put myself out there some more of these days and trying to do some more for myself.
Therapy Gecko
What ways are you putting yourself out there?
David
Just trying to meet more people. Trying to actively like socialize with people, strangers, you know, I'll just like go up to them and strike conversation or try getting my friends out or, you know, like I'm kind of interesting because I've, I guess there's the word like ambivert, like a little bit of both, like introvert and extrovert. But I'm trying to be more extroverted these days, meet more people. Because I found myself most of my life being introverted. And, you know, I'm just finally getting out of my shell. I'm in my late 20s now. I think it's a little something that comes with age possibly, but also another circumstance of like getting out of a long term relationship has also been wanting to, or actually pushes me to want to meet more people and to get out of like that sort of rut, you know? Mm.
Therapy Gecko
You said that you've met some people already. Who are these people? How did you meet them?
David
I'm into, I think for anyone that's listening, like if you're trying to get into the new hobby, like rock climbing is a great hobby, whether you exercise or not. Like it's a great social sport. So I've met some really great people through that. And then after that I'll invite them for, like, some drinks or something and extend our hangout and will do that. So it's a little social exercising, plus, you know, get that little socially, like just having some drinks and that sort of thing and having some fun that sort of way. Mm.
Therapy Gecko
Do you feel like you're able to connect with all that many people?
David
I'm trying the best I can. You know, I. I texted you a while ago. One of my issues, that work night shift, and it's been very grueling. I feel like I can't escape that night work from several jobs, though. I know that it's difficult to meet people when you're sleeping through the day, but I do the best to try to, you know, wake up early even though I'm tired. You know, I never get that great a rest, but I still like, you know, get my coffee in and go out and exercise, climb and hang out with some friends. Go out on my weekends, even though it's on the weekdays, you know, try to meet people. Just do the best I can when it comes to that sort of thing and socializing because I really. I work with a small crew at work, and it's like, we're all busy. They pay us pretty decently, so it's like, you know, there's that incentive to make sure you're doing a decent job, you know, so it's hard to socialize, especially when it's very busy. When it's a little slow, it's. It's okay to chat here and there, but when it's busy, it's like, you know, you're by yourself at times. And I, you know, I feel that I wish I was, like, talking to more people, but I don't feel that much too much these days because I'm trying to socialize more, you know, but, you know, your podcasts keep me very busy. And, you know, it's. It's nice to have. So thank you for that.
Therapy Gecko
What? Oh, of course, man. I'm honored to be hanging out with you in the forklift. Which brings me to my next question. What is the process of becoming forklift certified?
David
You know, I know that there's been a couple of some people brought up being a forklift driver. There's that one episode of, like, the one girl that's, like, really into her boyfriend as a forklift driver.
Chris
Quite funny.
Therapy Gecko
Is that true? Are the ladies all over you with the forklift stuff?
David
I feel. I mean, some of them still. I know that there's a trend of, like, being a forklift driver certified or whatever was like the hottest thing. And some people still remember that when
Chris
I bring it up.
David
And that's pretty sweet. But to be forklift certified doesn't take very much, you know, it's like a little golf cart or something. It's takes a couple months or so to get like decent at it. It's not the hardest thing in the world, honestly.
Therapy Gecko
What's your ultimate dream?
David
My ultimate dream? Oh man. I think just try to make the most out of life. Like, I don't know, my parents are, have immigrated and they're all about work, work, work. And I feel like I'm kind of like the black sheet of the sheep of the family where I'm like, yeah, I work a lot, but I also want to have as much fun as I work, you know, and try to experience and see as much as I can before I die. Like one of my things is like, I do not want to be on my deathbed and like regret not seeing more, you know. And I'm sure you could relate to that.
Therapy Gecko
What, what have you yet to do that you would regret not doing on your deathbed?
David
What have I yet to do? I mean, I'm trying to do. I feel that like right now I'm actively doing that. Like there's been so many times where I doubt myself of like, like I'll think of like something to do like this last few days, like to the last minute trip. Like I'm getting a booked up an appointment for a tattoo today. Technically I'm like, should I go? Because I work nights. Should I go the night of my day off and see, trying to meet some people, go out, get some drinks and then like do my tattoo like the next day, you know? And I was like just doubting myself, like, is that worth doing or should I just stay at home and like feel comfortable and then go the next day, you know? But I'm like, let me try to get out of my shell and try to experience something new and get out of that comfort zone, you know, so trying to do more of like a little last minute when it comes to things. But you know, that can be fun, you know, you never know what can come out of it. So I'm like, need to do more of like let's go do that one thing that you know, I normally wouldn't do. So I'm trying to do more of that, trying to plan some more things, that sort of thing, you know.
Therapy Gecko
You got any big plans on the horizon?
David
I want to just visit more of the country. I'm in the US But I want to visit Canada some more. I want to visit Mexico some more. Hopefully go to Europe one day, that sort of thing. Just need to see more things, meet more people. Just actively do as much as I can so that one day I don't regret, like, not doing enough, you know.
Therapy Gecko
And so you're in kind of a nomadic vibe right now. You're out, you're in. You're in your car.
David
That's crazy. Yeah, I am in my car. I forgot, you know, I've got a little camping setup. It's pretty chill. Got a little inflatable bed that I put in the back of my car. I've got little windshield covers, though. I forgot the front windshield cover. So hopefully I don't get in any trouble in the morning. But I'm like, it's a city. Like, there's not a bigger fish to fry around here, so hopefully I don't get in any trouble.
Jon Jon
But.
Therapy Gecko
How much. How much longer are you going to stay on the road for before you pick a place to. To hang out at?
David
Well, I do. I do have a home. I'm just, you know, traveling. I'm on the road a lot. I love to drive. I love to just. I don't know, I spend a lot of. If I'm not at work, I spend a lot of time either, like, climbing or just driving somewhere or at work, obviously, because I have to be at work. But besides, I hate being at home. Like, I just. I'm just at home asleep. But besides that, I love to just like, drive, listen to music on the drive. Just driving my car. I enjoy driving my car, you know, and it's a really, really important thing to do if you're trying to, like, drive 10 hours to go to like a national park or do something cool, you know, like, you gotta enjoy driving a little bit at least.
Therapy Gecko
No, I'm the same way. Like, when I. When I was first kind of starting doing this podcast in my mom's basement, I just couldn't. Like, I had to go out and it's like during COVID So, like, my. I had. I would have. I would record from like 6pm to 9pm and then it would be like, late and I would just like, get in my car and I would drive to the parking lot of a Dick's Sporting Goods, and I would just like, smoke weed in the car and listen to music just like in the middle of the night. Like, that was my night out. It was. It was actually. It was pretty chill. I would eat Jack in the Box. It was a chill time, man. Now that I think about it, those were. Those were chill nights. Just like, dude. Yeah, you know, very. Yeah, Very low five vibes.
Chris
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
I mean, like, cat girl.
David
A cat girl?
Therapy Gecko
No, you know, the fucking cat girl with the, you know, the lo fi hip hop beats, lady. I felt like I was that.
David
Oh, yeah. Oh, but that in your car, dude. Yeah, definitely. Like, yeah, I'm just like, thinking of all the things about you and like, one of the things that you've mentioned on this podcast, like journaling. Like, I personally journal as well. But also, like, being in your car is. Gives you just that space to, like, think a little bit, you know, it's like your little personal journal in a way. Like, your car is kind of like you bond with your car even. And it's like you get to think in your car. You eat, you can, like, listen to music, sleep in your car. Like, talk to Lyle on the phone in the car. Like, these are memories I'm going to have with my car for as long as I have this car for, you know, so it's special experience.
Therapy Gecko
I. I know I talk a lot about how I hate cars, but I do miss, like, sitting in them. Parked.
David
Yeah.
Therapy Gecko
I like being in a car much better when it's parked randomly than where it's, like, parked in a. In a place than when it's, you know, driving down the highway about to kill me.
David
Yeah, yeah, It's. Those car naps can. Can hit pretty good sometimes, too. I'll, like, I'll take a break. If it's like a really bad night, I'll take a little 15 break on in my car and just hit that nap and it hits differently.
Therapy Gecko
What's your name again, brother?
Chris
David. David.
Therapy Gecko
David. How'd I forget? David? It's like, David, there's a guy I went to camp with named Dave. His name. I don't know if he's still alive. Probably. He's probably my.
David
Isn't that crazy to think about, like, people that you grow up with and you're like, are they still alive? You know, it's kind of games.
Therapy Gecko
They could be dead. Life is fragile. Because they're probably 28 doesn't mean they're probably alive. You know, they could be. There's a lot of. There's a lot of good diseases out there now. There's a lot of shootings. There's a lot of ways. But hopefully he's.
David
Did you ever get Covid?
Therapy Gecko
Yeah, I got Covid a couple times.
David
I don't think I'VE ever gotten Covid, which is pretty crazy.
Therapy Gecko
I feel like you just jinxed yourself. Now you're gonna wake up with it.
David
No, I don't know. I tend to get sick like at least once a month and I think that's because like, like I never sleep, which is such a struggle. One of my issues currently is like, I never really sleep. And so I feel like my immune system is just like to the dirt. And so I get sick at least once a month, but I don't know if done sick terribly. But I've tested for code and never gotten it so far. I know it's still lingering around here and there, but so far so good, I guess.
Therapy Gecko
Dave, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
David
I think I want to say like, you know, don't. Like if you have plans and you have and you feel a little like apprehensive, like, just do it. Like it comes to anything, like traveling, you should definitely do it. You know, more people should travel, more people should see, see the world, experience people. Like that's what life is about. You know, like, there's nothing wrong with like chilling at home, but you know, life is exists outside of the Internet sometimes, you know, that's where you can truly make some real connections.
Therapy Gecko
And brother, don't we know it.
David
Yeah, it's good, it's good. But also like podcasts exist on the Internet, so I get it to be on the Internet, but meet people, travel, that sort of thing.
Therapy Gecko
Hey David, thanks for calling and listening, man. I appreciate you. Have a good rest of your evening in your car.
David
Sounds good, man. Nice talking to you too.
Therapy Gecko
See you, David.
David
Bye.
Therapy Gecko
Sometimes in life you gotta hang out in your car. Quitting nicotine isn't easy, but is better done with support. Having a community to lean on can help make it feel more manageable. X Program by Truth Initiative is a free quitting tool that can increase your odds of quitting by up to 40%. You'll get 24. 7 advice via text message and community support from people who know what you're going through. That kind of backup can really help change stick. So quit smarter, not harder, with Xprogram. Visit Exprogram.com to learn more and join for free when you're ready.
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Therapy Gecko
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Podcast: Therapy Gecko
Host: iHeartPodcasts
Air Date: March 18, 2026
In this episode, Therapy Gecko (Lyle) takes calls from listeners across the universe, delving into their unique, messy, and often comical personal situations. The show balances raw honesty about addiction, relationships, and personal growth with moments of absurdity and heartfelt advice—all filtered through the persona of an unlicensed lizard therapist. Three main callers feature in this episode: Chris, Jon Jon, and David, each exploring the crossroads of adulthood, struggle, and self-discovery.
Segments: [01:43] - [48:17]
Background & Turmoil
Relationship Breakdown
Mental Health & Coping Attempts
Post-Jail Life and Intentions
Reflections on Community and Change
Staying Sober & Ongoing Struggles
Memorable Sendoff
Segments: [51:57] - [62:41]
Student Life & Relationships
Uncertainty about the Future
Philosophy on Living
Segments: [66:28] - [83:41]
Transient Lifestyle & Self-Growth
Challenges of Adult Transition
Importance of Action
The therapy gecko balances bleak honesty with sharp humor and surreal, lizard-themed roleplay. The conversations feel raw and vulnerable; the language is casual, explicit, and peppered with internet and gaming references. Lyle often oscillates between sincere support and comic detachment, inviting callers to reflect while also acknowledging life’s absurdity.
This episode of Therapy Gecko explores the sometimes humorous, sometimes harrowing process of pulling oneself out of chaos—be it addiction, heartbreak, or existential confusion. Through callers like Chris, Jon Jon, and David, Lyle teases out themes of community, the struggle for self-improvement, and the ongoing quest to find meaning amid setbacks. The episode leaves listeners with a blend of practical encouragement (“just keep trying”) and the comforting knowledge that nobody’s journey is as smooth or linear as it seems.