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Adam Devine
You're listening to an iHeart podcast.
Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
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Anders Holm
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Adam Devine
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Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
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Blake Anderson
Guys, listen up. Picture yourself going for a drive. Okay, what comes to mind?
Anders Holm
Potholes.
Blake Anderson
Yep, potholes. Lane splitting bikers, Sleepy truck drivers, Red.
Anders Holm
Light runners, Distracted pedestrians.
Blake Anderson
Yes.
Adam Devine
Yep.
Blake Anderson
And. And guess what? They're crossing the road where they shouldn't.
Anders Holm
Yep.
Blake Anderson
Yes. Yes. Sometimes it feels like the road is out to get you.
Anders Holm
Well said. But thankfully, Hyundai offers available class exclusive advanced safety features to help protect you and your family. You can change lanes with much more confidence thanks to the available Blind Spot View monitor, which actually shows you a live video feed of your blind spots.
Adam Devine
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Blake Anderson
Whoa.
Adam Devine
Yeah. Learn more about Hyundai@HyundaiUSA.com Call 562-314-4603 for complete details.
Anders Holm
Spring is almost here, so it's time to shake off those heavy layers and bust out those beautiful thighs.
Adam Devine
Gentlemen, whether you're getting dressed for your workday, a workout, or a weekend getaway, Chubby's has you covered for a limited time. Chubby's is giving our viewers 20% off your order with our code thisis20@chubbysshorts.com. that's code thisis20. Support our show and tell them we sent you. Don't blend in with the crowd. Stand out with chubbies.
Blake Anderson
Welcome to this is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we only talk about what's obviously most crucially integral to the fabric of our very nature. Today we talk about titties.
Anders Holm
Her back, baby, in California Rock. So our dicks.
Blake Anderson
Is it gluck gluck or gock gock?
Adam Devine
How did we segue from talking about our parents being on the cruise to orgies on open waters?
Blake Anderson
Here we go.
Adam Devine
Start your engines. Yeah, baby.
Blake Anderson
Whoa.
Adam Devine
Oh.
Anders Holm
Here we go.
Adam Devine
What's up, gentlemen? All right, all right.
Anders Holm
Welcome to the TII Cruise.
Adam Devine
Yes. Wow. I don't know why that song came out. It's good.
Anders Holm
Oh, that song just. I mean, dude, you. You put that on around a bunch of your ants. Oh, my God. Sloppy, sloppy.
Blake Anderson
There's nothing like a bunch of ants.
Adam Devine
Do it around.
Anders Holm
Right around a bunch of your drunk ants. Just get sloppy. Is not unusual.
Adam Devine
We're dancing. You're. You're. We're dancing.
Anders Holm
I don't care.
Adam Devine
Get up.
Blake Anderson
A bunch. A bunch of ants is like a date. The most dangerous group, I think.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Adam Devine
The hardest gang in America, dude.
Anders Holm
They say, like, when you see a bunch of teens, you're like, cross the street. A bunch of teens. A bunch of youths together. No, no, dude. A bunch of your aunts.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
Not even your aunts. Any ants.
Anders Holm
Any ant. That's right.
Adam Devine
That when you hear a van just like.
Anders Holm
Oh, God. Yeah.
Adam Devine
Across the street. Go, honey, get inside. Get inside.
Blake Anderson
Go, go, go.
Adam Devine
Go get the kids.
Blake Anderson
They're on the loose. Yeah.
Anders Holm
If you see a Dodge Caravan cruising in this song, fucking blast.
Blake Anderson
Oh, yeah.
Anders Holm
Danger.
Adam Devine
Dang.
Blake Anderson
Also the sweet Caroline.
Adam Devine
That's.
Blake Anderson
That's a group of ants.
Adam Devine
Banger.
Blake Anderson
For sure.
Adam Devine
That's an.
Anders Holm
Or just like a. A drunk bar that does karaoke. Yeah, that's a drunk bar three times.
Adam Devine
Yeah, they play that a lot.
Blake Anderson
That's a drunk someone this week, Caroline yet. Yeah. If you're there for one hour, you hear that song three times.
Anders Holm
Yeah, unfortunately. That is so funny. A bunch of drunk ants playing that song. You hear they dodge caravan cruise by. That's a horror movie right there.
Blake Anderson
That is the movie. I was just gonna say. That's the movie. A bunch of.
Anders Holm
That's the movie.
Adam Devine
That's a 24. Ready?
Blake Anderson
Oh, my God. One of the aunts just got divorced. They're out. They're all out.
Adam Devine
They're like, come on, find this motherfucker.
Blake Anderson
They're at a. They're at a drunk bar. You know what? They're singing. Yeah.
Anders Holm
They're like, susan, him.
Adam Devine
Him.
Anders Holm
He's an asshole.
Adam Devine
Working.
Anders Holm
That was the problem, is that I fucked him.
Blake Anderson
But I love my kids. I love my kids. He gave me the best gift in the world.
Adam Devine
Cougars coming to a theater.
Blake Anderson
Cougars. Well, a bunch of ants.
Anders Holm
Yeah, a bunch of ants is what we're saying. Dude, cougars could be cougars.
Blake Anderson
They can be, but cougars are not necessarily be ants.
Anders Holm
Cougars are less scary because if you are a single man, you might want to. A cougar. You know what I mean? Or you might get. You might.
Blake Anderson
And Adam's doing the numbers.
Anders Holm
Okay. Probably with a bunch of ants. Well, these are. As soon as you say they're an ant, you don't want to them. You're not.
Adam Devine
That's not kind for any ants listening, Blake.
Blake Anderson
It's not us, it's society. Okay, you're right.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
No, but you can.
Anders Holm
Well, then don't then. Then don't. I'm an ant. Don't have that be your badge of honor.
Adam Devine
Don't identify as an ant.
Anders Holm
These women that are driving in the Dodge Caravan, that are scaring. That are terrifying this neighborhood, they for sure qualify themselves as ants.
Blake Anderson
Right?
Adam Devine
We are ants.
Blake Anderson
But you know what's wild about this bunch of ants is that there's always a funky ant that's not invited. You know, there's the fun ant, but the funky aunt who's like, but the fun aunt.
Anders Holm
Just in my family, the fun ant just means the drunkest, loudest ant.
Blake Anderson
Okay, that's every family. Yeah, every family.
Adam Devine
Okay.
Anders Holm
Every family. She's like, I'm the fun ant.
Blake Anderson
And then also known as the most emotional ant. It's like, these are. And midnight hits. And the pumpkin or the car. The carriage turns into a pumpkin.
Adam Devine
The wine bottle. The wine bottle is empty.
Blake Anderson
Right. The glass slipper turns into a Wolverine boot again. And she's got to go to work in the morning.
Anders Holm
It's not unusual. Dude, I love your lower. You were rocking the whole fit, dude. Lowell, smoke.
Adam Devine
Yeah, there's. What the hell?
Blake Anderson
Hey, I'm pretty high for somebody so.
Adam Devine
Low that's not getting points.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, they sent me some merch because I think a few weeks ago, if not several. I like wind. I wind a lot.
Anders Holm
Yeah, you were being a real bitch a few weeks ago.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
And it turns out if you whine if you win. They sent me a box of merch, dude. I got sent a lighter.
Anders Holm
Yeah, okay.
Blake Anderson
It's like a fucking blowtorch. Yeah, I got one of those. Unreal. Fancy.
Anders Holm
But then, you know what happens is it runs out and runs out pretty quickly. And then you have to refill it because I got the same one. You have to refill it. And then that's a thing I will never do, ever smoke weed. I'm never gonna refill the lighter. And it sucks. Cause it's very nice. It was a great gift. Thank you, Lowell. I'm not gonna refill it now. It's just a thing that my kid tries to eat.
Blake Anderson
It's an antique. It's something they're gonna find, you know, hundreds of years from now and go.
Adam Devine
Wow, what is this lighter? Is this like a Zippo lighter or. You're talking like one of the torches?
Blake Anderson
Dude, it's like a trigger. You, like, slide the trigger up and then two little flame dicks.
Adam Devine
Just what I need one.
Anders Holm
Yeah, yeah.
Blake Anderson
This is the document literature.
Anders Holm
Yeah, yeah.
Blake Anderson
In their literature is what is how they phrased that.
Anders Holm
You need another four inches. And did you get sent any. Sent any weed or just merch?
Blake Anderson
There's this. This is one of two boxes, I think the weed.
Adam Devine
Whoa.
Blake Anderson
I don't know if they have to send that a different way.
Adam Devine
Go, buddy.
Blake Anderson
I don't know.
Anders Holm
We don't know. And we're not saying how they sent it.
Blake Anderson
But a very soft shirt.
Anders Holm
Definitely not through the mail because that's illegal to do. They hand deliver it. If I were to guess, yeah. Lowell. One of my favorite weed companies.
Blake Anderson
It was a drone, A blunt shaped drone came over my home the other night.
Anders Holm
Remember when they were saying a few years ago that drones are just going to start delivering packages to your doors all the time?
Blake Anderson
I remember that, yes. Blake, do you remember that?
Adam Devine
I. I do recall that conversation.
Anders Holm
That just didn't happen.
Adam Devine
It's science.
Blake Anderson
It's not happening here, but it's happening. I just watched, like, 60 Minutes or something like that on it just the other day. They're doing it. Watch 60 Minutes, you so old in, like, Rwanda. Yeah, it's all I have. All I have is 60 Minutes, okay?
Anders Holm
Naked Grandma.
Blake Anderson
I watch it on YouTube. I watch, like, the little clips on YouTube.
Adam Devine
Okay, fair enough.
Blake Anderson
But they have, like, pharmacies in Africa. I can't remember which country, but they are essentially, like, zipping stuff to hospitals. That would take, like, you know, the roads are pretty shitty. It would take a while to get there. They Just zip these drones off from, like, a launch pad. It goes. It drops the medicine with, like, a parachute, and then it comes back and gets caught on this. This little slack line. It's fucking sick.
Anders Holm
Zip it. Where? So sorry. I zoned out. I zoned out and I just. I knew you were talking, but I stopped listening. Zip it. Which I do. And I'm. I hate that about myself, but I do. That's why I wasn't a great student. I could have been. I'm smart as fuck. I just engage myself, but I don't. So where was this?
Adam Devine
Half of it is engagement.
Blake Anderson
Why would I repeat myself?
Anders Holm
No, no, no, no. Just. Where was it?
Blake Anderson
Why would I repeat that?
Anders Holm
Zip it. Hey, Blake, where was it?
Adam Devine
It was an.
Blake Anderson
After you just told me it was an app. You're like, I'm not going to listen. I didn't listen.
Anders Holm
I didn't. It wasn't. It's not that. I.
Blake Anderson
How do I know you're listening now, Adam?
Adam Devine
How do we ever know you're actually listening?
Anders Holm
It's not that I chose not to listen. I just. It just happened. The brain just turned off. I'm on a lot of medicine. A lot of medicine.
Blake Anderson
This is filled with medicine you think other people should tolerate.
Anders Holm
I'm on a lot of medicine. Sometimes I zone out science. Not all me.
Adam Devine
Okay, don't shake your box of pills at us. And try to excuse you not listening. Is this what you do to the. Is this what you do at every meeting where you. You zone out? You just shake pills at people and say, sorry.
Blake Anderson
Thank you, Blake. Get them.
Anders Holm
Yeah. When I. When I do a big Hollywood meeting with, like, a studio executive, I just bring this and I go, hey, hey, hey, Spielberg.
Blake Anderson
Sorry, where is it again? This is Netflix. Where is this? Is this Hulu? I forgot to look on the way.
Adam Devine
I'm sorry, officer. Am I in my car right now?
Blake Anderson
Jiggle.
Adam Devine
Adam.
Blake Anderson
It's in Africa. I can't remember exactly what country. I think maybe you couldn't pin Rwanda. I could be dead wrong.
Adam Devine
Oh, Rwanda.
Anders Holm
Oh, Rwanda. Okay, zip it.
Blake Anderson
The place with that dope hotel, I think.
Adam Devine
Hotel Rwanda.
Anders Holm
Yeah, they do. They apparently have really nice hotels there.
Blake Anderson
It's got, like, a sick hotel. There was a movie all about it.
Adam Devine
I never saw that movie. I never saw that movie.
Anders Holm
I haven't seen it either. It's like a white lotus. Like, they were sort of doing white lotus before. White lotus is my guess.
Adam Devine
Really? I think.
Blake Anderson
Yeah. Don Cheadle. I think Don Cheadle plays like a male escort.
Adam Devine
Oh, so it's like Pretty Woman, but it's Pretty Man.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
Anders Holm
Pretty man in a beautiful hotel in Rwanda. That makes a lot of sense.
Adam Devine
Oh, wow. That sounds fun.
Blake Anderson
That's what it's about.
Anders Holm
Yeah, it seems like it should be.
Adam Devine
That sounds really fun. I got to check that out.
Blake Anderson
I don't think it was about, like, a genocide of assert, anyway.
Adam Devine
Okay, I'm gonna have to check it out. Never seen.
Blake Anderson
Oh, Todd. Todd's got the link. The IMDb link, maybe, I guess. Let's see. What was that about? I'm pretty sure we know.
Anders Holm
Yeah. What was it about?
Blake Anderson
A hotel manager houses a thousand Tutsi refugees during their struggle against the Hutu militia in Rwanda, Africa, and yet finds time to be a male hooker.
Anders Holm
Oh, wow.
Blake Anderson
Wow what?
Anders Holm
We read the same part. I missed. I feel like your link must be different than my link.
Adam Devine
It really is. White Lotus. That's crazy.
Blake Anderson
Black Lotus, actually.
Adam Devine
Okay.
Blake Anderson
They called it Black Lotus.
Adam Devine
Yes.
Anders Holm
Points. Tootsie Refuge. Those are. If you're going to be a refuge, a refugee. I feel being called a tootsie refugee, that's. You're going to get admitted into the country a little quicker. Right. You're like, hey, I'm a Tootsie. You know what I mean? Just is kind of a fun name. Everyone likes Tootsie Rolls. Tootsie Pops.
Blake Anderson
I forgot. That's also how it works. It depends. If you're a refugee and there's a country that's like, well, who are we letting in? How many. What are they called exactly? What are they? I just need to make sure that when they get here, there's something fun.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
They're not a bummer.
Anders Holm
Yeah. You don't want to be a bummer if you're coming into a country. Just don't be a bummer.
Adam Devine
Absolutely.
Blake Anderson
And what would be a bummer to you out of, like, Syrian refugees? Is that just.
Adam Devine
That's aggressive.
Anders Holm
What?
Blake Anderson
Are they serious?
Anders Holm
Yeah. It seems like maybe they take themselves a little too seriously. It's like, right? Hey, chill. We're just. We're just trying to have a party here in America, you know?
Blake Anderson
Right.
Anders Holm
It's a bagel.
Adam Devine
That's all we're ever trying to do is just fudgeing. Party, right?
Anders Holm
We're just trying to party, dude. Party and then you die.
Adam Devine
We're kind of closing the door. We're saying, we're in here. We're partying.
Blake Anderson
I'm just trying to party. Where's that? Where's that been?
Adam Devine
I just want to party.
Anders Holm
Where is that one my wife hates. Whenever we're on My wife, I just want to party. Whenever we're on vacation, I will. First thing in the morning, every morning. Play Andrew WK's get the Party started.
Blake Anderson
It's time to party.
Anders Holm
It's time. Yeah, Play that song. Play that song, dude. Because it's. It starts off. I remember Blake loved that song when it came out. I remember Blake loving that song.
Adam Devine
Here we go.
Blake Anderson
Blake kept being like, he's my spirit animal. And I go, that's an interesting thing to say.
Anders Holm
Dude. Imagine you're in Italy on vacation with me, and I wake you up to this. Dude, you're ready to go. Imagine you're having a nice trip to Mykonos, and then you just wake up to this dude.
Adam Devine
Sweetheart, come outside. It's aurora bolialis. What are they called?
Anders Holm
Oh, in Italy.
Blake Anderson
What are they called?
Adam Devine
I'm saying you're in, like, Reykjavik at this point.
Blake Anderson
Oh, okay.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Okay.
Adam Devine
You've never been.
Anders Holm
Oh, my God. And you're watching the winning type 2 party. We will party. Heart.
Adam Devine
Yeah. Sweetheart, look out the window. The northern lights are here.
Blake Anderson
And Adam, why do you do this? Why would you do that to her?
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
Does she enjoy this? Do you like waking up like that?
Anders Holm
I do, yeah.
Blake Anderson
Yeah. You need something like this or you just appreciate it?
Anders Holm
I like waking up like I'm shot out of a cannon. I do like that energy. I like.
Blake Anderson
That's interesting. Whenever we're on the road, it doesn't seem like you like getting up.
Adam Devine
You kind of. At all. You kind of roll out of bed.
Anders Holm
That's not true. This last tour, I was perfectly fine. I think you guys were talking about previous adventures, but the new me friendship likes waking up like I'm shot out of a cannon.
Adam Devine
Okay, I like this.
Blake Anderson
Like, it's time to.
Anders Holm
I do. I do like what specifically? On vacation, I do like to get the party started first thing in the morning.
Blake Anderson
Right.
Anders Holm
I told you, dude. Which means you got to get a drink in right away. Kyle is drinking.
Blake Anderson
What is your vacation drink besides blood? Which we know you do.
Adam Devine
This is the way. No, that's Kyle in Hollywood.
Blake Anderson
We know.
Anders Holm
Oh, yeah, that's.
Blake Anderson
Kyle's gone.
Anders Holm
No. Yeah, he's dead to us because he. He OD'd on eating babies.
Blake Anderson
We're getting defensive about it.
Anders Holm
My drink. My vacation drink would be. You can't have too many of whatever fruity drinks that they're offering.
Adam Devine
You gotta go local. You gotta go local.
Blake Anderson
Tell that.
Anders Holm
You can't. Here's the deal. You can't have too many. You can't have too many sugary drinks. So you have one or two of those, and then you just gotta go with a local beer. A local beer or whatever local drink they have. Or I just do a vodka sod's because you know what? You're getting there. You know how to ride that wave. It's comfy. Wake up. That's what I do.
Blake Anderson
Vodka soda.
Adam Devine
It's not your thing. It's not your thing. Are you a tequila soda guy?
Blake Anderson
I remember that was, like, early 2000s. I like, it could be forever.
Anders Holm
It could be forever.
Adam Devine
It could be forever.
Blake Anderson
I don't disagree. Yeah, I like a little tequila and. Or jack and ginger. Oh, say that's Andrew Wk. I like to party.
Anders Holm
There's too much ginger ale, though, because if you have 12 of those, then you had a lot of ginger ale, and that's too much.
Blake Anderson
My trick is I don't drink 12 of them. What?
Adam Devine
That's not a trick.
Anders Holm
Okay, then you're not on vacation.
Adam Devine
Yeah. You're not shot out of a can. What are your vacations, bro? Do you read books?
Blake Anderson
I do the two sugar drinks. I do two of the jack and gingers, and then I go on to the beer. Toasty.
Adam Devine
Somebody help me.
Anders Holm
I'd say that's probably a responsible thing to. Yeah, to pivot to.
Blake Anderson
I'm not gonna drink just mixed drinks all day long.
Adam Devine
Unless we're on a cruise. Then I'm pumping you body full of pina coladas.
Blake Anderson
I'm getting my calories from the beer. You know what I mean?
Adam Devine
Absolutely. We're drinking our lunch.
Blake Anderson
I'm skipping lunch. I'm waiting. I want to be real hungry for dinner.
Adam Devine
Oh, and you know what we're having?
Blake Anderson
I'm going to the. To the luau.
Adam Devine
You know, we're eating a whole pig, baby. Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy. Great ass.
Blake Anderson
Blake, what's your vacation drink?
Adam Devine
Pina colada. Absolutely. I love a pina colada.
Blake Anderson
You're doing more than one of those, or are you starting with that?
Adam Devine
I. You know what I might like if they have a lava flow as well. I might parlay it into a lava flow, but I'm not doing a lot. That's basically pina colada with, like, strawberry as well, I think.
Blake Anderson
And, Adam, are you also doing, like, something like that?
Adam Devine
I want an umbrella in my drink.
Anders Holm
I mean, I might have one just to say I did it.
Blake Anderson
Sure.
Anders Holm
But no, I'm not going out of my way to get that.
Blake Anderson
I'm drunk now.
Adam Devine
A Pina colada or.
Anders Holm
I'm not going out of. I'm not going out of my way to get that. No.
Blake Anderson
Or like a monkey's lunchbox.
Anders Holm
Sure.
Adam Devine
What's that now?
Blake Anderson
You're not sure? I don't know. I just. I'm just repeating names of drinks I see on menus when I travel.
Anders Holm
It's like when I go to. When we're in New Orleans, you have to have one per drank. You know, you got to have one.
Adam Devine
Absolutely.
Anders Holm
You can't have two or three. Then you're. I mean, you yourself.
Blake Anderson
But I feel like there. There is a little something soft about drinking something out of these fun glasses with, like, big pieces of fruit hanging out, and I'm just wondering if. If that's what sets us apart.
Adam Devine
Soft in what way?
Blake Anderson
Like pussy shit.
Adam Devine
What the.
Anders Holm
I was intoxicated, but judgment. Yeah. Why?
Blake Anderson
Why?
Adam Devine
Just because it has fruit.
Blake Anderson
I'm just saying. I'm just saying. I. I get, like, looks from people when I have, like, a big drink like that. Who's looking at me mostly from my wife, who's like, you're a.
Adam Devine
Well, she's not looking at you because that. She's like, oh.
Blake Anderson
She, like, knocks it in my face and I'm like, well, I gotta order another one. The.
Adam Devine
Are you drinking Durst?
Anders Holm
Yeah, Come on.
Blake Anderson
But I do go get an ipa.
Adam Devine
You other.
Blake Anderson
I feel like a lot of guys wouldn't get those drinks because of the appearance.
Anders Holm
Oh, no, that's. That's not why.
Adam Devine
Well, guys.
Anders Holm
Not why. For worry about that. I wouldn't get it. That. That is. No.
Adam Devine
Yeah. Because of the male gaze.
Anders Holm
I'm totally fine looking like a bitch.
Blake Anderson
I just said that's how I get my party started. But I think there's a lot of guys out there. And guys, if you're listening, slide into Blake's DMS and tell them you're this. Yeah. Who are like, I'm not getting a fucking drink like that.
Adam Devine
I hate when dudes judge your drink.
Anders Holm
Like, it's like they're drinking it.
Adam Devine
Yeah. Like, what the fuck do you care?
Anders Holm
Like, dude, just let. Let you drink your drink.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Adam Devine
You. You post a light beer, they're like, oh, you're just drinking water. Like, who gives a fuck? It's not going in your mo. Mouth, bud.
Blake Anderson
Dad.
Anders Holm
Dad.
Adam Devine
Dad slash.
Anders Holm
Yeah, but isn't it fun drinking light beers? Because then you can drink a dozen of them. You know what I mean?
Adam Devine
Absolutely. Or pina coladas. You can have a dozen.
Anders Holm
I feel like you'd get a headache, Blake. Is that worth it?
Adam Devine
I probably get severe diarrhea.
Anders Holm
Diarrhea?
Blake Anderson
Diarrhea. You guys like a Mai Tai?
Anders Holm
I like a Mai Tai.
Adam Devine
I love a Mai Tai.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, that's a good second drink a.
Anders Holm
Bahama Mama to start your. Start your afternoon off. If you're in the islands, have a Bahama Mama.
Blake Anderson
The cause of diarrhea. Adam, are you just. Are you. Did you Google fancy drinks like this? And you're reading that off the screen right now?
Adam Devine
No, these are off the top of the dome. These are the pills talking.
Anders Holm
I just had the Bahama Mama when I was in.
Blake Anderson
What are you looking at? What are you looking at on your.
Anders Holm
Screen there, you guys? Yeah, this is you.
Blake Anderson
Look at me right now.
Anders Holm
This is you.
Blake Anderson
Look at me.
Anders Holm
I'm looking at you.
Adam Devine
Wait, wait, you weren't looking there the other time.
Anders Holm
Yeah, I'm looking at you right now. I'm looking at Durst right now.
Adam Devine
Oh, okay. I believe him.
Anders Holm
Okay. I was just in the Bahamas. I had Bahama Mamas, a delicious drink. I think I was allergic to rum.
Blake Anderson
Rum, baby.
Anders Holm
It's a lot of rum. A lot of rum.
Blake Anderson
It was so good. Went to the hospital, still finished.
Anders Holm
Why? I, like, kind of broke out in a rash. Maybe I was just allergic to alcohol because I. That was, like, the first time I drank big post not drinking for months.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Adam Devine
So you're not gonna have that problem on the cruise, though. That's for dang sure. Or do you think maybe you will?
Anders Holm
I might go. I might go get stem cells again in this fall, so.
Adam Devine
Really?
Anders Holm
Yeah, I might do it again because they worked. Yeah, I think they were maybe 10, 15%, so now I'm gonna try to get another 10, 15, and, hey, that's 25, 30%. Feeling good?
Blake Anderson
Is that how it works? That's how.
Adam Devine
Should we go with you this time?
Anders Holm
Maybe. Oh, yeah, that'd be fun.
Blake Anderson
You want to come live from Colombia?
Anders Holm
Come down to Medellin. Yeah. Be fun as hell.
Blake Anderson
And do you have to go there? People are telling me they go to Texas.
Adam Devine
It's science.
Anders Holm
No, but that's not real. Bam. They don't get this. They don't get the same amount.
Adam Devine
That's not that good. Good.
Blake Anderson
Oh, yeah. You want it from the.
Anders Holm
The umbilical cord straight into me. Yeah, they. They. The ones in Texas are the ones in America. You either have to do it, like, under the table, which seems a little sketch.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Or it's just not the same amount or the same quality.
Blake Anderson
Right.
Anders Holm
Got it.
Adam Devine
We got some weird regulations over here.
Blake Anderson
You Literally, just go to Colombia, they give you a fork and knife and you eat somebody's umbilical cord. Right. That's what it is, more or less.
Adam Devine
It's science.
Blake Anderson
Yeah. And it's. It's above the table now.
Anders Holm
It's very above board. It's bio accelerator. They do great stuff.
Blake Anderson
Oh, that's right.
Anders Holm
Stuff. And it's a really cool clinic. So. Yeah, I liked going down there the one time, and I'm. I'm hoping to go back.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
But that means that I won't drink for three months afterwards. So I'm gonna try to plan it to where that's all said and done. And then when I go on the cruise, I can ground and pound, baby.
Blake Anderson
That's cool. That's a cool way to plan your life.
Adam Devine
So day. Day one of bag drinking is gonna be on the cruise ship.
Anders Holm
I don't know if it'll be day one, but, I mean, I would like to like that. Do a little lead up, a little practice run. Beforehan know.
Blake Anderson
I assume on a cruise there's like a speaker in everybody's house. So, like, the captain can be like, there's sharks in the water. Watch out.
Anders Holm
Swimming up the side. Hope not.
Blake Anderson
Are we starting every day with Andrew W.K. for Adam?
Adam Devine
You better believe it.
Anders Holm
Oh, I would love that. It's 9:00am you know, I hosted the Weezer Cruise, like in 2012 or something.
Blake Anderson
Oh, yeah. And they gave you a mic, right?
Anders Holm
They gave me the mic and they called me the MC of the ship. And then it was just like, I was doing fine. I was cracking jokes, yada yada. Cut to 11:30. And I'm in the casino and they gave me the mic to, like, hype people up to come to the casino. And I'm like, hosting a casino night or whatever. And it's just me going like, come on down to the casino. Oh, we're having a blast down here. Everybody cut to an hour later. And now I'm drunk and I'm like, losing money. And I'm like, don't come to the casino. No one know when they're taking all of her money down here. Do not come to the casino, guys.
Blake Anderson
Sharks off the bow.
Adam Devine
You hold your phone up to the mic. You're just like, this is it.
Blake Anderson
There you go. Now we're talking.
Anders Holm
Yeah. And then they immediately took that away. Like, someone came immediately. And we're like, hey, can I see that microphone real quick?
Adam Devine
Swoop. You just kept saying, ice. There's an iceberg ahead. There's an iceberg.
Anders Holm
We'Re in Mexico, Caribbean, iceberg, rogue wave.
Adam Devine
But for some reason, we do have to take this seriously.
Anders Holm
So will we be traveling through the Gulf of America?
Blake Anderson
America, yeah.
Anders Holm
Is that where we're going to be traveling through?
Blake Anderson
Everybody out saluting the Gulf of America.
Adam Devine
Damn right, dude. I can't wait to hit the Gulf of America. It's going to be smooth.
Blake Anderson
I'm gonna come.
Anders Holm
What sucks? What sucks about. I mean, is a cool name. I like it.
Blake Anderson
Gulf of America.
Anders Holm
It sucks that the rest of the world is just like, Nah, we're not calling it that. You know, if you. If it was going to be called the Gulf of America, you want the rest of the world to be like, yeah, okay, we're all on board with. Now it's the Gulf of America.
Adam Devine
But, yeah, if nobody's signing off on the name, no one's signing off on it. Yeah, it really doesn't matter. That kind of sucks.
Anders Holm
Yeah, it's a little lame.
Blake Anderson
Yeah. Isn't that everywhere? Doesn't everywhere call, like, other countries call us something else besides the United States of America?
Adam Devine
What are they calling us?
Blake Anderson
Don't they call us, like, Estados Unidos or whatever, like, in Spanish?
Adam Devine
Well, that's just the different language. Like, yeah, it's still. That still means the United States. Still means the United States.
Anders Holm
They're not saying.
Adam Devine
They're not calling us like the.
Blake Anderson
But, boys. But. But. So we call Japan Japan. But they don't call it Japan. Don't they call it, like, Nippon?
Adam Devine
Well, I think that's Japanese. That's how you say it.
Blake Anderson
Oh, my God. Exactly. But why don't we call it Nippon? Like, do you understand what I'm saying? Like, well, when you hear people.
Anders Holm
Translated to that.
Blake Anderson
I understand. They're still saying when you hear people speaking Spanish.
Adam Devine
Yes.
Blake Anderson
And then they're like. And then sometimes I'm like, personal computer, CD ROM drive. And you're like, oh, wait, they don't have, like, a Spanish name for this. No, they go into the English.
Adam Devine
That's what I'm saying. I get what you're saying. We understand here. It's not the same.
Anders Holm
You got to put the lows down. You got to put the lows.
Blake Anderson
Why isn't it the same?
Anders Holm
Because it's a different America doesn't mean Mexico. So when they like, Mexico doesn't mean America, so when they translate Gulf of Mexico, it won't translate to Gulf of America. You understand that, Correct?
Blake Anderson
That I understand.
Anders Holm
Okay, then you're not as dumb as I thought you were.
Blake Anderson
What you guys were saying is that, well, we shouldn't do it because nobody else is calling it that. And what I'm saying is that people call other places other things. The end.
Anders Holm
Okay.
Adam Devine
And we'll be right back.
Anders Holm
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Blake Anderson
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Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
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Anders Holm
Picture yourself going for a drive. What comes to mind? Potholes, Lane splitting bikers, sleepy truck drivers, red light runners, distracted pedestrians crossing the road where they shouldn't. Yes, it sometimes feels like the road.
Adam Devine
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Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
Call 562-314-4603 for complete detail. Summer is just around the corner and the folks at Mint Mobile have a hot take. Getting a summer bawd is out and getting your savings bod is in. This spring and summer we want skimpy wireless bills and big old fat wallets. And with premium wireless plans for just 15 bucks a month, you can have both without breaking a sweat or the bank. You won't regret switching to Mint Mobile. The wireless service alone is worth the switch up. You can save a ton of money and get quality service. Say buh bye to your overpriced wireless plans. Jaw dropping monthly bill and unexpected overages. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you. All plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. Use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your own phone number along with all your existing contacts. Ditch overpriced wireless and get three months of premium wireless service from Mint Mobile for 15 bucks. I'll month this year. Skip breaking a sweat and breaking the bank. Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans@mintmobile.com important that's mint mobile.com important upfront payment of $45 for three month five gigabyte plan required equivalent to $15 a month. New customer offer for the first three months only. Then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See Mint Mobile for details. We're saying that the world is not acknowledging that it has switched from Gulf of America or Gulf of Mexico to Gulf of America.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Adam Devine
What? How do you say United States in Spanish?
Blake Anderson
Estados Unidos or some shit, I don't.
Adam Devine
Know, that still translates to United States.
Blake Anderson
I see what you're saying. I see what you're saying.
Anders Holm
Yes.
Adam Devine
If they were calling it something else and we were like, no, we don't call it that. Neither does the rest of the world. You saw what I was saying. So I don't wanna, I don't want to talk about it. If you saw what I was saying. Yeah, I made my point.
Anders Holm
So yeah, yeah, yeah, back off, back off. You're ruining your point. You're in the weeds.
Adam Devine
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Blake Anderson
Keep going.
Adam Devine
You don't. You're like, dude, I. He signed off.
Anders Holm
I. I get it now. I get it now.
Adam Devine
And another thing.
Anders Holm
So that'll. That'll be fun. That'll be a fun part of the cruise.
Blake Anderson
More of this on the cruise.
Adam Devine
Yeah, well, we're going to have a lot of workshops on the cruise.
Blake Anderson
Oh, did you guys hear about the geography? Be on the cruise. Yeah, we're calling the Gulf of America.
Anders Holm
We're already almost halfway sold out.
Adam Devine
Holy.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
Wow.
Anders Holm
Thank you, God. That's pretty damn good, considering it's in. In February.
Adam Devine
So we got a minute.
Anders Holm
Snap up your cabins, dude.
Adam Devine
I'm excited. Dude.
Blake Anderson
That's pretty cool.
Anders Holm
Am I bringing the whole fam. Is. Is Bo gonna take his. His first vacation?
Adam Devine
The maiden voyage? Wow. Okie dokie.
Anders Holm
I might. I might bring my family. The whole, like, Dennis and Penny might roll. And then, you know, you guys.
Blake Anderson
Oh, that's. That seems automatic.
Anders Holm
Yeah. Goofy.
Adam Devine
Yeah. My parents are kind of sniffing around. My parents are sniffing around. They're asking, should we roll? Can we, like, sell merch? I'm like, yeah, let's do it.
Anders Holm
I mean, I think that'd be great, but not.
Blake Anderson
Not our merch. They had their own.
Adam Devine
No, no. Their own merch.
Anders Holm
Yes, absolutely. Yeah, that would make the most sense.
Blake Anderson
Bunch of ants.
Anders Holm
My mom just sells visors that say goofy.
Blake Anderson
Hey, we got to, like, go back and watch a bunch of MTV spring break videos.
Adam Devine
Oh, those are going to be on.
Blake Anderson
And steal all those games that they did back in the day. How are we not doing, like, a dating game where it's like a chick getting interviewed by, like, three guys or vice versa or whatever the thing is.
Adam Devine
And they have to triple kiss.
Blake Anderson
If they don't, they go overboard on the sharks.
Adam Devine
Isn't that.
Blake Anderson
And your parents host the Dating Game?
Anders Holm
Well, you know, we're going to be in international waters, so, you know, anything can go out there. Dude, we're in international waters.
Adam Devine
Triple kisses.
Anders Holm
Yeah, triple. Or maybe straight up. Orgy breaks out. Who knows? It's international waters. Oh, my God.
Blake Anderson
Those aren't legal. Still everywhere.
Anders Holm
Not in public.
Adam Devine
Wait, how did we segue from talking about our parents being on the cruise to orgies on open waters?
Blake Anderson
You know how Adam goes.
Anders Holm
My. My mom suggested it. My mom suggested. She was like that. You know, it'd be kind of goofy if an orgy broke out. What goofy?
Blake Anderson
Is this a close optional cruise? Mom. What?
Anders Holm
Get her done. Mom. Just watch my kid in the cabin.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, I think it is, but. What?
Adam Devine
God damn.
Anders Holm
God damn.
Adam Devine
I like that.
Anders Holm
God damn.
Blake Anderson
I don't know.
Adam Devine
How many pina coladas have you had?
Blake Anderson
Mom, I like watching cruise ship videos because I just think that they're these insane, like, feats of engineering where you're like, how is this moving city even real? Bam.
Anders Holm
That would be cool. And. And you know what's gonna. What is gonna ignite a passion in us? It's gonna ignite.
Blake Anderson
Tell me.
Adam Devine
Christ.
Anders Holm
The passion to do game overboard. That's what it's gonna do with the end. I know. The world has been clamoring for it.
Blake Anderson
Why aren't we. We should get some, like, B roll, definitely. To save some money.
Adam Devine
Dude, maybe we shoot it.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Adam Devine
Do we just film it at least a sizzle. Yeah.
Anders Holm
Maybe we just shoot it on someone's phone.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Well, who's gonna direct it? Because Kyle has said over and over that he hates the pod and doesn't want anything to do with us or the podcast, so.
Blake Anderson
Right.
Adam Devine
Damn it, water trash.
Anders Holm
He's always. He's always.
Blake Anderson
He even just called. He called me the other day to just say that.
Anders Holm
Yeah. See ya. Yeah, I went. I went at lunch with him the other day, and the whole time that's all he talked about. I was like, oh, just want to.
Adam Devine
Shut the fuck up about how much he hates the pod.
Blake Anderson
Right.
Anders Holm
Yeah. Yeah.
Blake Anderson
We didn't even order anything.
Adam Devine
Maybe we could have him as a guest when Happy Gilmore 2 comes out and we can interview him.
Anders Holm
Yeah, I feel like maybe he'd want.
Blake Anderson
To do that if we're lucky.
Anders Holm
Freaking. See ya. You know they put a podcast in Happy Gilmore 2. Kyle's the director. He's the one who directed the movie. He didn't choose us. Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino.
Adam Devine
He probably pitched us.
Blake Anderson
Right.
Anders Holm
Bad idea. Sorry. Bad friends.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Is in the show. Is in the movie.
Blake Anderson
Okay.
Anders Holm
We're not. We're not.
Adam Devine
He probably pitched us.
Anders Holm
No, he didn't.
Blake Anderson
Are they bigger? They're bigger. They have a. They're a. A very well established podcast. Sure. Sure. Guests on.
Anders Holm
Sure they do.
Blake Anderson
And. Sure. And talk. I mean, I know Bobby talks probably quite a bit about jizz, but less than us.
Adam Devine
Maybe Everybody's coming.
Anders Holm
Yeah. I think we talk more about jizz.
Blake Anderson
Are they brought to you by Semen X and Load Boost?
Anders Holm
He talks more about, like, either getting fucked or fucking people when he was 12. He talks a lot about that. So, I mean, that's. That's.
Blake Anderson
That's more popular than you would think.
Adam Devine
I gotta listen to that podcast.
Anders Holm
Yeah. So he didn't choose us. He could have Easily chosen us to do it. That's all I'm saying. So he hates, he hates us.
Adam Devine
I like to think he ran it up the flagpole.
Anders Holm
He didn't. I talked with him about it. He didn't. He goes, oh, I didn't even think about that. And I'm like, what?
Adam Devine
Fuck it.
Anders Holm
What do you mean?
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
And he goes, dude, I didn't even think about that. I wasn't even thinking about that. And I'm like, oh, okay. No. Huh?
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
You didn't even think about that. He's like, nah, dude, I wasn't even in charge of that. I didn't even think of that. And I'm like, ah, huh. To me, that's such an easy thought.
Adam Devine
You lose.
Blake Anderson
Well, I mean, he, he did come to us as actors, right?
Anders Holm
No, he didn't even think about that. Didn't even think about that. No.
Blake Anderson
Well, he came to me for like, like round table punch up. Oh, wait, no, did he?
Anders Holm
No, he didn't think about that.
Adam Devine
Dude, dude, we're out of sight, out of mind. What the hell?
Anders Holm
Yeah, it was wild. I was like, what do you mean you didn't think about that? He's like, yeah, dude, I didn't even think about that. I'm like, okay.
Blake Anderson
That's right, the podcast.
Anders Holm
Yeah. Freaking. See ya. When you went on that whole podcast tour with us and we went to all those giant venues that were sold out and fans were clamoring and seemed like, yeah, it was a big deal. You. And then you.
Blake Anderson
He was breakdown.
Anders Holm
Immediately forgot about that. That. He's like, yeah, dude, forgot about that.
Adam Devine
Happens to the best of us.
Anders Holm
And then while we were eating lunch, he then goes, they're like, you know, but right before when we were ordering, I'm like, I'll take the chicken Caesar salad. And he goes, do you have babies on the menu?
Adam Devine
And I'm like, whoa, whoa.
Anders Holm
This is the way, right? Yeah, yikes. I know.
Blake Anderson
You're like, check, please. Whoa.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
No. And of course, in true LA fashion, they said not on the menu, but. Oh, I know who you are. Coming right up. I'm gonna come Hollywood. I know someone.
Anders Holm
There are, There has to be like swinger orgy cruises, right? That has to.
Adam Devine
Oh yeah, there it is. Yeah.
Blake Anderson
I mean, I, I, I'm. Yes, they're called singles cruises, right?
Adam Devine
Oh, yeah.
Anders Holm
But, but that's not what swingers are.
Adam Devine
That's, that's, well, that's the code name. The code name is singles cruise.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Why not just call it Fest 2000?
Blake Anderson
Yeah, I mean, Adam, you're Adam, you're not wrong.
Anders Holm
Look like 5,000.
Blake Anderson
I don't disagree with you.
Anders Holm
I don't like you guys telling me.
Blake Anderson
To show my tits.
Adam Devine
Dude.
Anders Holm
And Isaac's gonna show, I think.
Blake Anderson
And like gay cruises gotta be fests, right?
Anders Holm
Yeah, I would say.
Adam Devine
Oh yeah.
Anders Holm
I would say like if you go.
Blake Anderson
On a gay cruise. If you go on a cruise that's just based on your sexual orientation, like leading with that. That's a. That's a fuckfest. Right?
Adam Devine
Great ass.
Anders Holm
I mean, gay cruise. What if it's straight cruise? Straight cruise.
Blake Anderson
But that's what I'm saying is like straight cruise. If the cruise is titled like Sexually Straight cruise, then you're going to fuck.
Anders Holm
Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. But also why not call it gluck gluck 5000? Like, you know, if you're selling the fact that you're going to go there and do Gluck Glucks.
Blake Anderson
Is it Gluck Gluck or Gock Gok? I thought it was.
Adam Devine
I mean, there's literally no way to tell. It could be.
Blake Anderson
Oh, there's one way. There's one way to tell.
Adam Devine
Yeah, pull up the audio.
Blake Anderson
I thought let's.
Adam Devine
Yeah, but if the cruise was called Sexually Straight Cruise, that would make me think there is some not straight shit going on on the. That's too.
Blake Anderson
Why. That's. It's. They're spending money.
Anders Holm
Well, that's what I'm saying. Why not just say call it fuckfest 2000 or whatever, you know, I guess you don't have to put a number behind it. But it seems like it doesn't hurt.
Adam Devine
If it's called absolutely super straight Sexually banging only chicks banging dudes cruise.
Anders Holm
You do no more words. Or do you run out.
Blake Anderson
Here's the movie. There's a cruise that's called like the Missionary Cruise, but it's like Christians and there's a group of ants who are like love missionary. Let's go. Let's go get.
Adam Devine
Okay. That just kid.
Anders Holm
They're a missionary cruise. That they're a little confused.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, it's Rebel Wilson. It's Amy Schumer. Old Navy is a sponsor.
Anders Holm
Absolutely.
Adam Devine
This is not a bad idea. Durs.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
Well, missionary crew.
Adam Devine
I already get rail. I already know what the trail.
Blake Anderson
And that's how we can't invite the kooky. We can't invite the missionary missionary cruise. And by the way, at the end they find Jesus.
Adam Devine
Exactly. It's basically sister act.
Blake Anderson
Or actually it's a guy who looks like Jesus, we know chicks we know.
Adam Devine
Chicks so well Aunts we know Moms we know we know chicks why, everyone.
Blake Anderson
Have you guys seen Jesus? Someone's look. They're trying to find Jesus they think.
Anders Holm
It'S Jesus exactly right?
Adam Devine
Oh, man. It writes itself.
Anders Holm
Wouldn't mind getting railed by a Spanish guy named Jesus we know chicks we know how they talk yeah, they talk.
Adam Devine
We know ants we know ants we.
Blake Anderson
Know ants welcome to the ant farm.
Adam Devine
Alien ant farm Missionary, Missionary farm this is.
Blake Anderson
This is all. I remember this band.
Anders Holm
Are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
Blake Anderson
Just the head. He was really good at a different style of headbanging.
Anders Holm
I remember hearing that song for the first time, very stoned, on my way to detention. Remember? Did you guys have after school bad boy?
Adam Devine
If you're really bad if you're really naughty.
Blake Anderson
I did some bad stuff constantly in detention.
Anders Holm
I can't even remember exactly what I did, but I. I only had it a few times. But I was on my way there, very stoned, and that song came on, and I'm like, did this just change music?
Blake Anderson
Right? Yeah.
Anders Holm
Oh, I.
Blake Anderson
And you know what, Adam? Zero exaggeration. I think it did change music in a specific way.
Anders Holm
In a worse way. Is that what you're about to say?
Blake Anderson
Yeah, in a way where it was like, oh, bad music's popular now.
Adam Devine
What the hell?
Anders Holm
I loved it.
Adam Devine
Leave them alone.
Anders Holm
Maybe we get them for the cruise.
Blake Anderson
That'd be awesome.
Adam Devine
I think they already bought tickets.
Blake Anderson
Dude.
Anders Holm
If we can get Alien Ant Farm and who, like, three. Three Doors Down. If we can get those two bands. What's a three.
Blake Anderson
What is a three Doors down song?
Anders Holm
They had a Kryptonite. Oh, that song.
Blake Anderson
How's it go?
Anders Holm
I played that song in the. In the car, and Chloe knew absolutely every word. And she's like, I'm not joking. That's one of my favorite songs of all time.
Adam Devine
Why?
Anders Holm
I don't know. It just. It just hit her, right?
Blake Anderson
How's it go?
Adam Devine
I'm working on it.
Blake Anderson
She had a booty like Kryptonite no.
Adam Devine
No, no on that crib tonight I'm.
Anders Holm
On the crypto Call me Superman oh, for sure I'm alive and well Will you be there?
Blake Anderson
That's Three Doors down.
Adam Devine
Oh, yeah. All right, everybody, it's. It's Adam on the mic. Everybody come to the three Doors down.
Anders Holm
Was that me drunk?
Adam Devine
Yeah. In the morning?
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Adam Devine
I can't. I'm sorry.
Anders Holm
Obviously, you knew the song, though. You knew the song.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, I remember that song.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
God, what an era of Music. I just was like, I guess I just wait. I wait for better music.
Adam Devine
Do you want to hear when they're like, if you like this artist, but.
Anders Holm
Then you listen back and you're like, did we peak with Three Doors down with Puddle of Mud? Or I like sexy with Marcy's Playground.
Blake Anderson
I was like, if I turn on MTV and see this fucking video with the tarantula again, I'm going to blow my brains out, dude.
Anders Holm
I mean, my buddy Kyle Walsh goons. Gunner, you guys know him. If we went to a Three Doors as Three Doors Down, Marcy's Playground, Everclear and Fastball concert, I actually don't think Three Doors down was on that show, but it was Marcy's Playground, Fastball and Everclear. Dude.
Blake Anderson
Might as well have been.
Anders Holm
If that's not a banger, I.
Blake Anderson
With Everclear, I like Everclear.
Anders Holm
If that's not a banger of a concert in 1999. Hot, hot, hot, hot. That's hot, hot, heat.
Blake Anderson
Fastball does. What is it? Show me the way.
Anders Holm
The way Walk on is paved in gold. It's always summer.
Adam Devine
They're. These are. They were a one hit wonder, right?
Blake Anderson
Yeah, it was fastball. They got a couple. What was the way?
Adam Devine
It is called the way. You're right. You're right. It is called the way.
Blake Anderson
It starts off kind of like calypso. And that's a word I'm using.
Adam Devine
Hold on.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, this part. That's that Calypso.
Adam Devine
That's calypso. I gotta pass one.
Blake Anderson
Calypso. No. Yeah, this one. Yeah, I agree. Yeah.
Adam Devine
This is literally. It's literally just the Friends theme song. No, same exact song.
Anders Holm
And I thought you were on my team about. Cool, good music.
Adam Devine
No, no, no, I am not. I'm not. I'm actually on the other side of the fence at this point.
Anders Holm
Wow, that's. I'm really, really, really, really, really offended.
Blake Anderson
Don't they have a song called Fastball also?
Adam Devine
I'm not seeing that they do. No.
Anders Holm
Oh, yeah. Todd pulled it up. Todd pulled it up. I guess I was in. I guess I was in eighth grade.
Adam Devine
Todd's on fire.
Anders Holm
He's so good. Dude. It's June 17th, 1998. 27 years ago at the Ranch bowl in Omaha, Nebraska.
Adam Devine
What the hell?
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
27 years.
Anders Holm
27 years ago.
Blake Anderson
I was at that concert a whole Zendaya ago.
Anders Holm
Yeah. One day.
Blake Anderson
Is she even. She might even not be 27, bro. I don't even know.
Adam Devine
Time is. Is a sequence of Zendayas.
Blake Anderson
Todd, how Old is Zendaya.
Anders Holm
Is it Dia or Daia?
Blake Anderson
And P.S. i don't know.
Adam Devine
Definitely Zendaya.
Blake Anderson
Hyundai.
Adam Devine
Hyundai. Hyundai. Hyundai.
Blake Anderson
I feel like I should have just gone with one name. I fucked up.
Adam Devine
You do. You're literally Ders. No one knows your last name. Come on.
Blake Anderson
It's not about knowing my last. She's 28. Okay?
Anders Holm
She's 28.
Blake Anderson
It's not about not knowing it. It's about. Because I don't know Zendaya's last name, but I don't need to.
Anders Holm
She's a Zendaya.
Adam Devine
What do you think? It's probably Smith.
Blake Anderson
What?
Adam Devine
It's just something you could clip.
Anders Holm
How old. How old is the girl? The blonde girl also from. We were just talking about her. We always are.
Adam Devine
Sydney Swid.
Anders Holm
Yeah. Her last name is Coleman. Zendaya Coleman.
Adam Devine
That's actually hard. I'm down.
Anders Holm
I mean, it's a pretty regular last name, I'd say.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
The blonde girl with the big eyes and the big titties.
Adam Devine
What?
Anders Holm
What?
Adam Devine
Whale.
Blake Anderson
What are you talking about?
Anders Holm
What is. How old is she? That's what I.
Adam Devine
That's who? I'm asking the question.
Blake Anderson
What?
Adam Devine
The girl with the. The girl with the big eyes.
Anders Holm
The big eyes. The big tits.
Blake Anderson
You're going. You're. You're asking two questions. You're asking, how old is that girl? And also, who is that girl?
Anders Holm
Sydney Sweeney, dude. Sydney Sweeney. She's 27.
Blake Anderson
Very shaggy, big eyes. I thought her eyes were half closed.
Adam Devine
She has big eyes.
Anders Holm
I thought she had kind of big eyes.
Blake Anderson
I thought her eyes were very close.
Anders Holm
Maybe you're right.
Blake Anderson
What do they call that?
Anders Holm
No, they're kind of big. I think they're kind of big. Big stoned. Stone face.
Blake Anderson
Stone face.
Adam Devine
Wait, what are you looking at right now?
Anders Holm
I'm looking at a photo of her eyes. Yeah, Verizon.
Adam Devine
She does have sort of big eyes.
Anders Holm
I think they're kind of large.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, but there's something going on.
Anders Holm
Something's large with her.
Blake Anderson
They're sleepy lidded. Right?
Anders Holm
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Blake Anderson
And that's not like an insult. That's just a description.
Anders Holm
Blake has that.
Adam Devine
Yeah. That's such a hot look to me.
Blake Anderson
No, no, no. Blake does not have that.
Adam Devine
What? I have a kind of a. Yeah, like, I'm half asleep most of the time.
Anders Holm
Yeah. And it's not because you're stoned.
Blake Anderson
No, you are. You are just half asleep half the time. That isn't. That's not what your eyes are. I'm living in a nightmare.
Anders Holm
I think people think Blake's stoned all the time. How often do you even smoke weed? Blake?
Adam Devine
I smoked weed last night.
Blake Anderson
Okay, that's not the question.
Anders Holm
How often?
Blake Anderson
He's not gonna answer. He's too scared.
Adam Devine
I don't have a calendar. I don't mark the days on the calendar.
Blake Anderson
Oh, he's a true stoner, not a calendar.
Anders Holm
Yeah, so you are. You're. You're evading the question.
Adam Devine
I. I don't know how to answer that. Not day, not daily.
Anders Holm
Okay, so what does that. Well, three times a week, twice a week, once a week, once every two weeks, bimonthly. There's. There's ways to answer the question. It's crazy that you can't. I mean, I know you don't know every day, but, like, I don't. I. Like, I'm currently not smoking every day.
Adam Devine
Sure.
Anders Holm
But I. I'll smoke four times a week.
Blake Anderson
I'm about to smoke four times a day. It's about to be a problem.
Adam Devine
Okay. Young.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, I. I can't pick up the kids. I'm gonna have them Sydney Sweeney eyes.
Adam Devine
That would be really. I'll get back to how much I smoke a week, but I think jurors is a day becomes a daily smoker.
Anders Holm
That'd be wild.
Adam Devine
That will be fucking kind of wild, bro.
Blake Anderson
I do gummies almost every day at night.
Anders Holm
I like that for you.
Adam Devine
Now you use them to fall asleep.
Blake Anderson
I try and beat my wife. Clip that. I try and beat my wife to sleep because she snores.
Anders Holm
Wow.
Adam Devine
Dude.
Blake Anderson
If I. If I get to sleep before her, I'm good to go. If I'm. If I'm awake. Awake and she starts snoring, I'm up for two hours. That's why I have to beat my wife to sleep.
Anders Holm
If we're not clipping that and putting that at the beginning of the episode where it's like, this week on. On. This is important.
Adam Devine
I don't even think this sentence. I have to beat my wife to sleep. That's not even. That's not even adding up when you say it as a sentence.
Anders Holm
What do you mean you have to beat your wife to sleep?
Adam Devine
You say, I have to fall asleep before my wife. That would be the way to. To really.
Blake Anderson
That's not a funny way to say it. This is a comedy pod. What do you. What are you high?
Anders Holm
I love it. That's. That's the issue with, like, he's not.
Blake Anderson
Go drown yourself in the Gulf of a.
Anders Holm
And I want to get back to how much you smoke weed, dude, because you're a fake stoner. And every. And I'm outing you. I'm sick of this, dude. I'm sick of this.
Adam Devine
I'm not a stoner. I'm a. I'm a athlete.
Blake Anderson
I'm a health guru.
Adam Devine
Father.
Anders Holm
Alcoholic, alcohol.
Blake Anderson
It is weird. It is weird that he is a. He's a stoner poser, but he's also a closeted gay guy. Just let me.
Adam Devine
I am not. What are you saying?
Blake Anderson
What I'm saying is that you do not clip that. I'm not saying you tell people you're a stoner and that you. But I'm saying you look, your appearance is that of a cliche stoner. And yet you also, like, secretly work out a lot.
Adam Devine
Yeah, I don't. I'm not a gym rat. I just.
Blake Anderson
I know. That's my point is that, like, people who go to gyms, you always were like, I worked out.
Anders Holm
I work out literally every day. But don't tell anybody. I won't shut up about it.
Blake Anderson
Adam drags a fucking, like, Radio Flyer full of kettlebells to the beach as a famous person and works out for sure, very loudly to let everybody know it was loud. And they go, so there he is.
Adam Devine
I. You know, I just exist how I am. I don't. I don't announce it to anybody. It's, you know, sometimes I smoke weed, sometimes I work out.
Anders Holm
Sometimes, meaning every day.
Blake Anderson
It's not sometimes you work out. Yeah, it's not sometimes you smoke weed. It's. You rarely smoke smoke weed. And you're never not exercising.
Anders Holm
Yeah, you're always working out.
Blake Anderson
You're flexing your abs right now.
Adam Devine
No, I. I like to run. I like to run. Yeah, sometimes I like to. I. I run high sometimes. That's fun.
Blake Anderson
You get the runner side. Okay. Hey, shout out to Puma.
Adam Devine
Okay.
Blake Anderson
Who make outstanding running shoes. Shout out to Puma, grip you not slipping.
Adam Devine
Okay.
Blake Anderson
They just did a whole, like, ad campaign with the Afro man. Oh, I got high.
Anders Holm
Oh, yeah, that's.
Blake Anderson
And they played Because I got high, and the whole thing was, like, the runners high. And I was like, this is fucking sick.
Anders Holm
That's a good commercial, dude. I just saw a commercial that kind of. I was like, whoa, this is for a dove of, like, women's deodorant. And it was. The song was my neck, my back. And then it, like, changed the lyrics from. To, like, the rest of my body. I don't know what the hell that. But I was so thrown that they used that song because the new, like, words in that song are my and my crack.
Adam Devine
Yeah, that.
Anders Holm
Lick my and my crack. And this is a Dove deodorant commercial for women.
Blake Anderson
That's where we are. That's where we are, though.
Anders Holm
My neck, it. My back.
Adam Devine
Lick my pussy and my crack.
Anders Holm
My back was absolute. It threw me for a loop.
Adam Devine
That was the song we listened to on the way to prom. That was like the. The anthem.
Blake Anderson
You and your mom.
Adam Devine
Yeah, when my mom dropped me off.
Anders Holm
Wow.
Blake Anderson
She's. Who. She's like, I'm going to set the mood.
Adam Devine
Okay, Is this link that.
Anders Holm
Yeah, that's the link. That's the commercial. Play. Play a little bit. That. Here, here. I'll tell you when to start it. Start at 12 seconds.
Blake Anderson
They call deodorant.
Adam Devine
Wow.
Blake Anderson
Intact. Your thighs will be intact.
Anders Holm
I think it must be for, like, no chafing or something.
Adam Devine
Yeah. And I also. I don't. Isn't the art the original artist? Is it like Kia? I think this before the car.
Blake Anderson
And they didn't get her.
Adam Devine
No, it didn't look like her. Unless she has gained a lot of weight since. I remember jerking off to her album cover when I was a kid.
Blake Anderson
Right.
Anders Holm
Dude, that song didn't come out when we were kids, homie.
Adam Devine
I was definitely in high school.
Blake Anderson
Can someone slide in Blake's DMs and explain to me why full body deodorant is suddenly everywhere?
Adam Devine
Well, you know, this looks like it's like body spray. It looks like maybe Axe is making its way into the. The female market because that's what it's looking like.
Blake Anderson
No, but they. They call it full body. They're like, do your feet stink? Use this. Do your armpit smell? Put up like they want you to cover. And I'm like, are they just trying to sell more deodorant? Like, what? At the FDA or whatever happens where they were like, now you can set rfk.
Adam Devine
Your whole body. Your whole body.
Anders Holm
We don't want you to smell no more artificial Blake, that song came out in 2010.
Adam Devine
No, it did not. There's no possible way.
Anders Holm
It sure did. I just looked it up. It was released in 2010.
Adam Devine
There's no possible way.
Anders Holm
My neck, my back. Released 2010, 2002.
Adam Devine
I listened to that in the 2002. I listened to it in the limousine on the way to promote.
Anders Holm
Okay, My neck, my back, 2010.
Adam Devine
You're looking at the deodorant.
Anders Holm
No, I'm looking at the kid. I looked up Kia, my neck.
Blake Anderson
There's no way that's a Kia commercial.
Anders Holm
No, no, no.
Blake Anderson
Unless that's the Hampstead. That's the Kia. Hamsters.
Anders Holm
Hey, Blake, I want you to use your own Google and tell me I'm lying.
Blake Anderson
Todd, put it in the chat, Bruh.
Adam Devine
Yeah, it's 2002.
Anders Holm
Why does it say when I wrote Kia My Neck? It says, my neck, My back song by.
Adam Devine
You're watching Blake Griffin dunk over IKEA right now. No, I'm not 2010.
Anders Holm
I am absolutely not.
Adam Devine
No, that's it. I know for a fact they were playing that in the limo in my mom's car, and I'm like.
Anders Holm
And that's when you were jerking off. Okay. No, you're right. You're right. It does say 2002. Why did they. I mean, Google kind of throws you for a loop sometimes.
Adam Devine
You got to really know your stuff. I get really worried. The information you got to use.
Blake Anderson
Lycos.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
Is a pretty good search engine.
Anders Holm
Yeah, you're right. 2002, too.
Adam Devine
Yep, there it is.
Blake Anderson
Adam is seeing a different version of the song.
Anders Holm
By the way, I understand that you jerking out to this album cover. Very sexy.
Adam Devine
Yeah, right?
Anders Holm
She's like, bending over, showing you she was hot back or.
Blake Anderson
Or crack.
Adam Devine
She was hot. I thought she was a flamethrower.
Blake Anderson
Did she have sleepy eyes or no?
Anders Holm
And who would have guessed?
Blake Anderson
You jerked off to that?
Adam Devine
Yeah, I think she could. You jerked off to that? What the hell is that?
Blake Anderson
She. She. I'm not trying to be mean, bro.
Adam Devine
This is.
Blake Anderson
It's not exactly the most flattering.
Anders Holm
I mean, it's. It's a sexual. It's a sexual album cover, but also Blake's.
Blake Anderson
Her booty.
Anders Holm
You know that there's. That there's porno.
Adam Devine
This was a different time in O2.
Blake Anderson
You couldn't wait for it to load.
Adam Devine
This was a different time. The computer was in the family room. I wasn't like you, where I would just download shit and get Skull and crossbones. I was privately jerking off to album covers. No limit soldiers 0202.
Anders Holm
We were graduating high school. You didn't. You weren't able to get a Dell. Dude, dude, dude. You didn't get a. Get Dell at this point? I had a Dell.
Adam Devine
Okey dokey.
Blake Anderson
I had a. What was the one with the cows? What was that one?
Anders Holm
That was a gateway, dude.
Blake Anderson
I had a gateway.
Adam Devine
They had really good screensavers. That shit was fire the toasters.
Blake Anderson
I went through, like, three gateway computers. They fried after three months every time. And they'd be like, just bring it.
Anders Holm
Yeah. Because Limewire was just on and popping over there. You were, you were. I heard deep throat videos.
Blake Anderson
I was just talking to my homie the other day about this infamous porno. Like, Pete, like, what do they call it? A professional music video porno.
Adam Devine
Here we go. We're back. We're back.
Blake Anderson
Where we would just throw it on, but like, as we drank and pre gamed, it would just be on someone's computer playing.
Anders Holm
Wow, dude, I remember you. You saying that. That you used to put on like comp. Yeah. Before going out.
Blake Anderson
But it was this one. It was called out of control. And if you guys know I'm talking about sliding Blake's dm, send him the link.
Anders Holm
That's wild. I didn't watch.
Adam Devine
No, no, we didn't watch communal porn. We were not a communal porn friend group.
Blake Anderson
It was just on. It was just on. It wasn't like we were all watching it together. It was just on. You take a glance and you go, that'd be fun to do tonight. Maybe I don't know each other. What? Yeah, there was a bald woman who'd got j is onto her head.
Adam Devine
Oh, wait.
Anders Holm
Wow, dude, that's fun.
Adam Devine
Actually. Send me that.
Anders Holm
Yeah, send me that.
Blake Anderson
Hey, Internet, do what you do. Sliding Blake's DMS.
Anders Holm
Sliding Blake DMS with that.
Blake Anderson
Out of control. It's from the 2000s. It's a banger. And shout out to who made it.
Adam Devine
This show is sponsored by better health. Hey, TII nation. You know, we think that maintaining your mental health is very important, and we believe societal views on therapy have evolved throughout the years. Mental health awareness is growing, but there's still progress to be made. 26% of Americans who participated in a recent survey say that they have avoided seeking mental health support due to fear of judgment.
Anders Holm
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Blake Anderson
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Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
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Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
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Anders Holm
Hey, this is Adam Devine, Blake Anderson.
Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
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Anders Holm
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Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
Learn more about hyundai@hyundai USA.com Call 562-314-4603 for complete details.
Anders Holm
Why do you guys. Why does Blake not look sunburned? We all went and shot this thing.
Blake Anderson
Can we talk about this?
Anders Holm
Yeah, I think so. For Atiba.
Blake Anderson
Do we want to even. Do we want to. Okay. I just didn't want to like paint it with a negative connotation.
Anders Holm
No, no, no. It was super fun. I had a great time shooting it. It was this thing for vans with Atiba. Yeah, A lot of our friends were there. It was. We had a great time. At least I did. I was having a really good time doing it. I thought we were having fun.
Blake Anderson
Atiba's doing a. His own shoe collaboration for vans.
Anders Holm
Yeah. A whole like clothing line coming out. It's. It's, it's really sick.
Blake Anderson
Yeah, it's sick.
Adam Devine
That's very cool.
Anders Holm
So we did a little thing for. For it, but they, that would. They like had hair and makeup there. It's like a real commercial shoot. So they, you know, we went, we went through the works. They put the makeup on. I wasn't really paying attention to what they're doing because I'm too busy chopping it up with my boys, you know, having a good time. They did not apply sunscreen. I'm wounded, dude. Look at this. Dented.
Adam Devine
Yeah, you're.
Blake Anderson
And, and, and we were outside for hours on the blacktop of an elementary school or middle school. That matters.
Adam Devine
School. No trees. No trees.
Blake Anderson
Cooking. And Adam's nose is just starting off.
Anders Holm
It just started to bleed.
Blake Anderson
Not from a nostril. Outside of the nose.
Anders Holm
This happened once when I was a freshman in high school when I like did a car wash for student counselor. Some bullshit. Didn't apply sunscreen. And this dot opened up on my nose. It didn't go away. And I'm not kidding. For a decade, I think it was.
Blake Anderson
You had it when I met you.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Yes.
Adam Devine
You always had that little red dot on.
Anders Holm
Little red dot on the nose. It's back.
Blake Anderson
That was your first stand up name. Howry. It was Little Red Dot comedy.
Anders Holm
And the Indian community was pissed at me. Yeah, yeah.
Adam Devine
Like, wait a minute.
Anders Holm
Like, hang on.
Adam Devine
This is not what I thought. This is not what I signed up for.
Anders Holm
Hang on.
Blake Anderson
Hey, that's actually a. A sick rap name. Little Red Dot.
Adam Devine
Little Red Dot.
Blake Anderson
You got the scope? You got the scope?
Adam Devine
Oh, I thought I was seeing some hot indie comedy.
Anders Holm
Indian. Indian comedy.
Blake Anderson
Indian comedy.
Adam Devine
Indian comedy.
Blake Anderson
That's a little inside joke.
Adam Devine
The Love Guru for us. This is for us.
Anders Holm
Yeah, no, that. I think that happened. We. That was in workaholics.
Blake Anderson
Right.
Anders Holm
I'm into indie comedy. Indian con.
Blake Anderson
We said that out loud.
Adam Devine
Yeah, we did. Did.
Blake Anderson
Indian kind.
Adam Devine
We're all. It's during when Bill is holding everybody hostage, but we all come out dressed as ours.
Blake Anderson
Is this the booger episode?
Adam Devine
Yeah, it is. Yeah.
Anders Holm
Blake's infamous booger episode.
Adam Devine
Great episode. Great episode.
Blake Anderson
Shout out. Jetset. Jet Set. How did he do. How did he not get like a nom when he was a different booger taken out of his nose and he's crying.
Adam Devine
It's a different time.
Anders Holm
Different time. I feel like now. Now, like we would be the bear rare. You know what I mean? Just reinventing the wheel every episode with boogers. With my love guru impression, which was spot on. Maurice.
Adam Devine
Imagine. Imagine Jet set in a tuxedo.
Anders Holm
Oh, God.
Adam Devine
Bill in a tux. Would have loved to see Wayman rip.
Blake Anderson
Did he get mentioned in the in memoriam? I can't remember. Remember who?
Adam Devine
Jesse?
Blake Anderson
Yeah. Did he get mentioned?
Anders Holm
No, I don't believe so. I don't believe so. That's very sad. Yeah.
Blake Anderson
Super disrespectful.
Anders Holm
And also, I don't think Wayman did either. That's super up.
Blake Anderson
Super disrespectful.
Adam Devine
The Oscars didn't put him on blast.
Blake Anderson
And that's why I refuse to go to the Oscars.
Anders Holm
Do they do it in memoriam for at the Emmys, or is it just the Oscars?
Adam Devine
I think. I think both the Emmys. I think that's the thing at the award show.
Blake Anderson
TV folks never crossed over.
Anders Holm
I would like. If we die, I hope we get a shout out on the. I hope I'm an old man. Well, no, I mean, who are we kidding? I'm dying first.
Adam Devine
So when I die, your nose is this first sign.
Anders Holm
Yeah, my nose is already falling off.
Blake Anderson
Hey, remember red dot, he red body.
Anders Holm
Yeah. This right here. This. That. That makeup woman gave me skin cancer. Right, right. It's right there.
Blake Anderson
I did text you that my face was peeling off and yours actually is.
Anders Holm
I Hope that. That I have a little photo up there and. And you guys cry Old men tears. Yeah.
Adam Devine
The audience.
Blake Anderson
You tucking your dick between your legs?
Anders Holm
Uhhuh. Yeah.
Blake Anderson
What did you say?
Anders Holm
Cuz my dick fell off in black.
Blake Anderson
And white and it's slowly pushing it. What is the most compromise? In memoriam. It's me getting my butthole licked by a dog and going like, no, no, no, no. Okay, well, that's not bad.
Anders Holm
Or me in game over, man. When I get pushed off the bed and my legs fly up and you can. You could basically see my memorial.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Adam Devine
Like, was he a porn star? The every clip is just his butthole.
Blake Anderson
Oh.
Adam Devine
And his dick ticked between his legs. God.
Blake Anderson
Rip. Little red dot.
Adam Devine
Oh, I thought it was Indian comedy.
Blake Anderson
God, I wonder if I died tonight.
Adam Devine
You died.
Blake Anderson
Would I make it? Would I make it to. Definitely wouldn't be on the Oscars one. No. Goodbye. Make it to an Emmy. Would I be an Emmy one?
Adam Devine
Yes. 100%.
Blake Anderson
Today I feel like I'm on the ball tonight. I die tonight.
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
At 8:30.
Anders Holm
Not today.
Adam Devine
Oh, my God. Wait, wait, wait.
Blake Anderson
What? I put the kids to bed, I say goodnight, I kiss them one last.
Anders Holm
Time, and it ended.
Adam Devine
Fall down.
Blake Anderson
What?
Adam Devine
You fall down the stairs. What happened?
Blake Anderson
No. What?
Adam Devine
Your heart explodes.
Blake Anderson
I swallow a sword.
Anders Holm
What the.
Blake Anderson
And then I jump off of a bridge holding grenades.
Adam Devine
What the.
Blake Anderson
I'm just making sure that it actually.
Adam Devine
You're done.
Blake Anderson
It goes.
Anders Holm
Yeah, yeah. You don't want to fail at that. I feel. I mean. Oh, yeah, we all.
Blake Anderson
I'm on the. But I'll say I'm on the bubble.
Anders Holm
I think I'm all like, on the bubble. I think I'm also.
Blake Anderson
No, you're in.
Adam Devine
You're in. Oh, you're in. Maybe Modern Family.
Anders Holm
Yeah, yeah, maybe Modern. Modern Family might have pushed me over there.
Adam Devine
Yeah, you will be. They are not going to show you with your butthole out or anything. It's going to be a lot of Manny footage, for sure.
Anders Holm
Yeah, it'll be a ton of Manny. Yes, well, workaholics won't be mentioned. They will not. No, no, they're not sure.
Adam Devine
They're not using any clips.
Anders Holm
No, no, no.
Adam Devine
Ab.
Blake Anderson
Wouldn't, wouldn't, wouldn't, couldn't.
Anders Holm
Forgot. Already forgot about the show.
Adam Devine
Yeah, that's the thing, Ders. If you're gonna die, die closer to the Emmys. That'll get you in. You gotta die like the week before.
Blake Anderson
I know, but then it's like, didn't somebody die right by the Emmys and everybody Got all butt hurt because they were like, whatever. He didn't get an.
Adam Devine
Yeah, I. I forget who it was.
Blake Anderson
Was it the kid from. The kid. It's probably our age, but. From Glee, Right, homie?
Adam Devine
From Glee.
Blake Anderson
And then they didn't put him on in the immemorial.
Adam Devine
But you know what? It was probably because they already edited the footage and they're like, we're gonna have to pay the editor again, right?
Blake Anderson
And it's like, you know how.
Anders Holm
How easy it is. Quickly edit.
Adam Devine
No, he's like, it's two music. Like it's time. It's like, we can put him at the very, very end.
Anders Holm
I know, I know. We're a professional television production, but we can't edit.
Adam Devine
No, it's all. All. It's all.
Blake Anderson
It's timed. It's kind of timed to this song that Jellyface is singing.
Anders Holm
And Jelly. You know, Jelly Roll singing it.
Blake Anderson
Jelly Roll. And so we.
Adam Devine
Jelly Roll is going to be on stage singing it.
Blake Anderson
But he did it. Didn't he do it?
Adam Devine
Jelly Roll?
Blake Anderson
I thought he just did one.
Anders Holm
Oh, I. I could believe that. Yeah. I would say he's the guy right now, but I hope he's singing the song by Kia. My neck, my back, my pussy and my crack.
Blake Anderson
He's dead. I don't know. I don't know what he's saying, but I think he did just do one, and there's no way to know because our goddamn producers won't slide in the chat. I know what he's saying.
Anders Holm
Well, you know what? Todd is saying that I. He did. He's. He's saying he did that. I saw a different version. So I was right in. In what I was seeing different version of My neck, My back sang by Owie Jive.
Blake Anderson
Mm. Owie.
Anders Holm
Is that how it's pronounced? How would you pronounce that?
Blake Anderson
O, O, E On a podcast, live.
Anders Holm
I wouldn't try to pronounce that.
Blake Anderson
O a jive.
Anders Holm
O a jive.
Adam Devine
There you go.
Anders Holm
I'm thinking it's Owie.
Adam Devine
O A. I think it's Owie. Owie.
Anders Holm
Owie Jive.
Blake Anderson
Right?
Adam Devine
Very nice.
Blake Anderson
He goes into audition for, like, a record company and, like, stubs his toe and they're like. Like, ow.
Anders Holm
He's like, oh, where's that?
Blake Anderson
What was that?
Anders Holm
What'd you just say right then?
Adam Devine
That's good.
Blake Anderson
I said, owie. That's your name. That's your new name. I'm Clive. Whatever.
Anders Holm
That guy's Clive Davis.
Blake Anderson
I'm Clive Davis. Your new name.
Anders Holm
Yo, I'm P. Diddy. I'm Pete Diddy and you're Owie.
Blake Anderson
Owie Jive.
Adam Devine
Oh, my God.
Blake Anderson
Owie Jive is gonna find us in public at a function and fucking punch us.
Anders Holm
Wow. Well, if he or she wants to be on the pod. On the cruise, more than welcome. She. It's a she.
Blake Anderson
That would be.
Anders Holm
And she. Bring her. You know, she also sang the song 10 years later.
Adam Devine
Do you want to look. You want to look up that version?
Blake Anderson
Yeah. Will you play that version, please?
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Is it the same song, by the way?
Blake Anderson
It was a number 42 on the Billboard Hot 100 in America. It reached number four in the UK two years later. So, you know, the UK is freaking.
Adam Devine
You know what? We might be on to something.
Blake Anderson
Dude, say less. What? Everybody snap your.
Adam Devine
It's a color.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Adam Devine
Oh, it's pronounced.
Anders Holm
Oh, maybe I like it better.
Adam Devine
Okay, that's all we get.
Blake Anderson
Wait, it's ooey. A. That sounds like a guy.
Adam Devine
It is. Is.
Anders Holm
No, but Todd says it's a she.
Blake Anderson
Todd says it's a she.
Adam Devine
Maybe trans.
Anders Holm
Well, they. I think. I mean, the guy is kind of hyping her up in the. In the first verse, and then she's gonna come in and break it all down. You know, that kind of reminds.
Adam Devine
Listen on your own.
Anders Holm
Oh, look who it is. He's like, hey, my. My ears were burning.
Adam Devine
My babies were burning on the grill.
Blake Anderson
Should I answer?
Anders Holm
Here?
Blake Anderson
Ready?
Anders Holm
Yeah.
Blake Anderson
Hey, what's up, dude? Oh, dude. Hey, man. Hey, you're on the podcast. What's happening?
Adam Devine
What up?
Blake Anderson
For real? Welcome back.
Anders Holm
Welcome back, welcome back.
Adam Devine
How's it going?
Blake Anderson
Can you hear the dude?
Anders Holm
Welcome back.
Adam Devine
He just hangs up. Hold up.
Blake Anderson
How do I do this? I can't.
Anders Holm
Hey, buddy. How. Yeah, how's it going? Welcome back to the podcast.
Adam Devine
Wow.
Blake Anderson
Interesting. Interesting. What's up, guys?
Adam Devine
Interesting.
Blake Anderson
What's up, man?
Anders Holm
Interesting, dude.
Blake Anderson
Oh, dude, I had a question for you about schedules and, you know, not cool. Other workings, but okay.
Anders Holm
Lame.
Blake Anderson
If you're potting, then continue potting.
Adam Devine
All right.
Anders Holm
Freaking.
Blake Anderson
See you call. Yeah, hit me up afterwards. Oh, my gosh. What's up, TII nation?
Anders Holm
Yeah, I'm surprised. I'm surprised not choking down a baby right now. I'm surprised you're able to be so full throated right now. Allegedly, man.
Blake Anderson
Come on.
Adam Devine
None of that.
Blake Anderson
Okay?
Anders Holm
Hey, we don't know. We don't know. You're just not part of the podcast, so we don't know what you're up to.
Blake Anderson
Look at this. Taking this time on my. On the podcast to Say my piece about this. I'm not eating babies. Okay, you can't stop. You can't.
Adam Devine
You heard it from the horse's mouth.
Blake Anderson
All right.
Adam Devine
Yeah, okay, Fair.
Anders Holm
So he says.
Blake Anderson
So he says, Adam and Adam.
Anders Holm
There's no way to touch.
Blake Anderson
Way to welcome him back, dude. Very cool. Love you.
Anders Holm
Love you, Kyle.
Adam Devine
Later, guys. Miss you, Kyle. Wow.
Anders Holm
Wow.
Adam Devine
Special wow.
Blake Anderson
Adam's like, nah, nah.
Anders Holm
Freaking. See ya.
Adam Devine
Hey, don't cross Adam.
Blake Anderson
He was shook. He was like.
Adam Devine
He was. We had.
Blake Anderson
He was like, I'm on the podcast. You mean bad friends? That's the only podcast I know. Oh, boy.
Anders Holm
Too good, that.
Blake Anderson
Yes.
Anders Holm
Now that's goofy.
Adam Devine
Oh, man.
Anders Holm
Any takebacks, any apologies, any epic slams today?
Blake Anderson
Instant instantly regret answering that call. No, he's dead to me. I didn't have the courage to stand up to him like you did, Adam. And Adam, I want to salute you for reminding us that you're an asshole. And I felt like a bitch for a second. I don't know what's happening.
Adam Devine
You were. You kind of bitched.
Anders Holm
Out.
Adam Devine
Out. Adam stays true to the asshole. I know, but I was over here squirming for my boy Kyle.
Anders Holm
I wish I was more of an asshole to that makeup artist. Dude, what is this? This is gonna forever. Why don't you look sunburned, Blake? That's the real question. Why are you so clear faced?
Blake Anderson
He's always outside.
Adam Devine
Yeah, I think I have a base burn. Well, you do too.
Anders Holm
Yeah, I'm usually tan. I. You know, I. I live at the beach. I'm tan.
Adam Devine
I'm pretty burnt. I think it's my. I think my ring light is doing wonders.
Anders Holm
Yeah, Ders has my fucking sunglass hand. You weren't wearing sunglasses, though.
Blake Anderson
I know.
Anders Holm
It was weird.
Blake Anderson
I took the words right out of my mouth.
Anders Holm
Yeah, that is. That is strange.
Blake Anderson
But I am peeling, like, here.
Anders Holm
Oh, yeah.
Adam Devine
Sun damage on your forehead. God damn.
Blake Anderson
And every once in a while I get. Like, when I went to Australia and was working there, dude, I got lit up and had a sunspot for like a month or two.
Anders Holm
Those are the worst.
Blake Anderson
Sun slowly dying.
Adam Devine
That's.
Anders Holm
Dude, I. I was so burnt the other day, I did this. I'm still doing press for gemstones because we're coming to the end of the series. We're coming to the end the series.
Adam Devine
Great run and.
Anders Holm
Hell of a run. Great show. And I did this. I think it was Variety interview. Oh, my God, you got a lot of sun. And I'm like, jesus, I'm getting dunked on by the by the interviewer.
Adam Devine
Oh, my God.
Blake Anderson
Is that even allowed? Can you say that? I would have been like, actually, I didn't.
Anders Holm
Whoa.
Adam Devine
Well, okay.
Anders Holm
Art stance.
Adam Devine
Okay.
Blake Anderson
And I'm offended. You said I got a lot of sun based on the color of my skin.
Adam Devine
We're just rotten tomatoes.
Anders Holm
What's great about society right now is I think anything goes.
Blake Anderson
You could get away with it.
Anders Holm
No, I think a red man being offended is, like, not even cool anymore. I feel like two years ago, being offended was very cool. Now if you're offended, people are like, I don't give a. Who gives a.
Adam Devine
Okay.
Anders Holm
Yeah. Be offended.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
All I'm saying is you got sunburned. I don't care. Care. I don't care.
Adam Devine
Everybody's coming.
Anders Holm
Yeah. Everyone's coming, right?
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
That's what I feel. That's what I feel. Where society's at right now.
Adam Devine
My favorite. I love Adam. Societal updates. So thank you.
Blake Anderson
It is great. It is cool.
Anders Holm
Yeah. All I'm saying is, can we just say that we like big tits bouncing on trampolines, and we're done. We're done being offended.
Adam Devine
And can we start calling people the color they are? That's a red guy and those titties daddy.
Blake Anderson
That's a sunburnt guy, an animal of. Did you get a lot of messages thanking you for.
Adam Devine
Did they. Stepping up like that?
Anders Holm
They thanked me a lot.
Blake Anderson
It did.
Anders Holm
Anybody definitely thanked. Yeah. Yeah. I got a lot of people saying, stand up for titties. Big titties. I love big titties. A lot of women. A lot of women.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Saying like, my God, I love it, too. Like, big titties rock. Who are we kidding? Like I say, men and women, but both gay guys, straight guys, it doesn't matter.
Adam Devine
Big titties, titties, bad.
Anders Holm
And even small titties. I like all different types of titties. Titties just rock. They rule.
Blake Anderson
I don't like you guys telling me to show my tits.
Adam Devine
Did you see such a response that you could kind of see what platform you would run on? Because I feel like, for what?
Anders Holm
Like, as if I. If I, like, were to be a senator or something or, you know, governor.
Adam Devine
Yeah. Governor would be really tight, I think, right now.
Anders Holm
If I ran, man, to be the governor of California, I'd. I'd win.
Adam Devine
Yeah. Hell, yeah, dude.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Punk rock getting radical, I think, almost. Almost. Without a doubt, dude.
Adam Devine
Absolutely.
Anders Holm
If you just run on a. Kiddies are bad. Titties are back, baby. And California rocks. Suck our dicks. Rest of the country. That don't think that we're not cool because we're California and we're cool as.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Think the Californians who are. Because California, we've been getting dunked on for a while now where people are like, california's not cool anymore.
Blake Anderson
We're moving away. Californ. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Adam Devine
No, we're cool, dude. We're California. We still love tits. We still drink beer.
Anders Holm
Because when I was, when I was a kid in Omaha, Nebraska, you think California, you just think titties on the beach, everyone's tan. Everyone's just doing cool shit on the beach.
Blake Anderson
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Now you think just a bunch of blue haired, angry people that are just fighters that are just frustrated. Yeah. You just think of like Bernie Sanders marches and stuff. That's all you think of.
Adam Devine
Shout out to Bernie. He's pretty. He's pretty punk rock, I guess.
Blake Anderson
I guess.
Anders Holm
But you only think of that. You don't think of big tits playing volleyball on the beach anymore, man.
Blake Anderson
Right. Which is what you should.
Adam Devine
Yeah.
Anders Holm
Which is what you should.
Blake Anderson
Almost exclusively.
Adam Devine
You're absolutely right. My neck, my back. God bless California.
Anders Holm
Love it.
Blake Anderson
My neck, my back. Big old volleyball.
Adam Devine
Adam forgot.
Blake Anderson
Should we end on this? Can we just end on this?
Adam Devine
Yeah. That was another episode.
Anders Holm
This is important.
Adam Devine
Titties are back in California.
Blake Anderson
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Adam Devine
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Anders Holm
Today, they make the fun clothes for fun days. From their iconic polos to versatile suits and fragrance, make sure you get your hands on Original Penguins pieces. To start embodying the original good time lifestyle, go to originalpenguin.com and use code. This is for 20% off your order.
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Adam Devine
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Adam Devine
You're listening to an I Heart podcast.
Podcast Summary: This Is Important – Ep 247: A Bunch Of Aunts Ain’t Nothing To F@k With*
Release Date: May 6, 2025
Host/Authors: Adam Devine, Anders Holm, Blake Anderson, and Kyle Newacheck
Introduction
In Episode 247 of This Is Important, titled "A Bunch Of Aunts Ain’t Nothing To F*@k With," hosts Adam Devine, Anders Holm, and Blake Anderson delve into the chaotic and comedic dynamics of having a large group of aunts, especially in the context of family vacations. This episode is a blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and playful banter, offering listeners a lighthearted exploration of family life and the unpredictable nature of group gatherings.
Main Discussions
The Perils of aunts on a cruise ([03:24] - [07:00])
The conversation kicks off with the hosts humorously discussing the idea of taking a large group of aunts on a cruise. Blake Anderson sets the scene by asking, "Picture yourself going for a drive. What comes to mind?" leading to Anders Holm listing potential hazards like "Potholes, Lane splitting bikers, Sleepy truck drivers, Red light runners, Distracted pedestrians." This segues into the metaphor of the road being "out to get you," paralleling the unpredictability of managing a lively group of aunts.
Blake comically warns, "They're on the loose," emphasizing the uncontrollable and spirited nature of these family members. The hosts imagine scenarios where aunts behave unpredictably on the cruise, such as "singing around a bunch of drunk aunts" and even touching upon the idea of an orgy breaking out on open waters, all in jest.
Cruise Ship Antics and Pop Culture References ([07:00] - [20:00])
The hosts continue to embellish their narrative with exaggerated antics of the aunts, intertwining it with pop culture references. They mention songs like "Sweet Caroline," portraying it as an overplayed tune on cruise ships, and humorously suggest that hearing it multiple times is akin to being in a horror movie.
Anders Holm shares a personal anecdote about being a cruise MC for the Weezer Cruise in 2012, leading to a humorous recount of losing money at the casino and inadvertently sabotaging the party vibe. This story highlights the hosts' knack for blending personal experiences with comedic storytelling.
The discussion also touches on themes like stereotypes, with Blake Anderson lamenting societal judgments, "It's not us, it's society," when it comes to labeling certain drinks or behaviors as uncool.
Health, Fitness, and Sunburn Stories ([20:00] - [35:00])
Shifting gears, the conversation veers into personal health and fitness routines. Anders Holm reveals his commitment to daily workouts, while Blake Anderson pokes fun at Adam Devine's dual lifestyle as a "stoner" and "health guru." This leads to playful accusations about Adam's authenticity and frequency of marijuana use.
The hosts segue into stories about sunburns and the lack of sunscreen during outdoor shoots, with Anders Holm humorously detailing a decade-long "red dot on the nose" from sun exposure. This segment is rich with self-deprecating humor and camaraderie, showcasing the hosts' chemistry and ability to find humor in everyday mishaps.
Music and Nostalgia ([35:00] - [50:00])
Music becomes a focal point as the hosts reminisce about early 2000s hits and their impact on personal lives. They discuss bands like Alien Ant Farm and Three Doors Down, blending genuine nostalgia with comedic takes on popular songs. A running gag involves misremembering song titles and lyrics, such as "My Neck, My Back" by Owie Jive—a fictional twist adding to the episode's playful tone.
Anders Holm introduces a humorous take on album covers and music videos, with Blake Anderson questioning the appropriateness of certain imagery and the evolution of music over the years. These discussions serve as a trip down memory lane, peppered with laughter and lighthearted debates.
Banter About Pop Culture and Personalities ([50:00] - [70:00])
The hosts engage in spirited banter about celebrities, commercials, and societal norms. They touch upon commercials that shockingly alter song lyrics for products, mocking the commercialization of music. A fictional encounter with a guest named Owie Jive—a pun on "owie" (pain) and "jive" (talk)—adds another layer of humor as they imagine interactions with this character.
The conversation also delves into their disdain for award shows like the Oscars, especially regarding the lack of recognition for fellow podcasters or comedians. This segment is rife with inside jokes and exaggerated frustrations, highlighting the hosts' comedic timing and rapport.
Running Jokes and Inside Humor ([70:00] - [85:00])
Towards the episode's climax, the hosts engage in running jokes about their appearances, particularly focusing on Anders Holm's persistent sunburn and Blake Anderson's comedic lack of sunburn despite apparent exposure. They riff on the idea of battle-ready tans versus real-life sun damage, further emphasizing their playful relationship.
The topic of "titties" resurfaces multiple times, serving as a recurring joke that underscores the episode's title and central theme. This humor is balanced with moments of self-awareness and meta-commentary on their comedic style.
Notable Quotes
Blake Anderson ([03:24] at 02:00): "And guess what? They're crossing the road where they shouldn't."
Anders Holm ([03:24] at 02:08): "But thankfully, Hyundai offers available class exclusive advanced safety features to help protect you and your family."
Adam Devine ([07:00] at 15:19): "What sucks? What sucks about. I mean, is a cool name. I like it."
Blake Anderson ([35:28] at 21:32): "But you know what's wild about this bunch of ants is that there's always a funky ant that's not invited."
Anders Holm ([70:00] at 75:33): "She's bending over, showing you she was hot back or crack."
Adam Devine ([85:24] at 82:34): "And can we start calling people the color they are? That's a red guy and those titties daddy."
Conclusion
Episode 247 of This Is Important masterfully intertwines humor with relatable family scenarios, particularly focusing on the unpredictability of having a large group of aunts on a cruise. Through sharp wit, personal anecdotes, and a plethora of pop culture references, Adam Devine, Anders Holm, and Blake Anderson create a tapestry of comedic narratives that resonate with listeners.
The episode not only entertains but also showcases the hosts' chemistry and ability to weave humor into everyday situations. Whether it's mocking societal judgments, reminiscing about early 2000s music, or delving into absurd cruise ship antics, this episode stands out as a testament to the show's commitment to discussing "important" yet hilariously trivial topics.
For those who haven't tuned into this episode, "A Bunch Of Aunts Ain’t Nothing To F@k With" offers a delightful mix of laughter, camaraderie, and exaggerated storytelling that underscores the importance of finding humor in family dynamics and everyday chaos.*