Ep 274: Men’s Rights Mansplained

Summary

This is Important – Ep 274: Men’s Rights Mansplained

Podcast: This Is Important
Hosts: Adam Devine, Anders Holm ("Durst"), Blake Anderson, Kyle Newacheck
Date: December 9, 2025

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Overview of the Episode

In this characteristically irreverent and candid episode, the TII crew – minus Kyle – dives into topics ranging from the nuances of men's "self-care" (read: masturbation) etiquette in relationships, to Quentin Tarantino's controversial recent podcast appearance where he shredded some notable actors and shared his much-discussed favorite movies of the 21st century. The guys weave in stories about mustaches, adolescent sexuality, nostalgic board games, and what they’d do if acting dried up. The banter is loose, hilarious, and occasionally introspective, all in the signature crude-yet-clever TII style.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Masturbation and Relationship Dynamics

Timestamps: 03:20–14:52

• The episode opens with Adam and Durst joking about the blissful alone-time after dropping kids at school, leading swiftly into a conversation about masturbation habits as dads and husbands.
  • Blake: “Have you guys ever had a girlfriend...that was bothered by you jerking off?” (05:28)
  • They discuss partners' jealousies, boundaries, and the cultural narratives online about porn addiction.
  • Durst: "Let's just be clear here, right? You don't like me jacking off. Sorry." (07:10)
  • Adam: "That's it. That's explaining men's right?" (07:18)
  • They debate whether watching porn or just using imagination is "worse" for a partner's jealousy, with consensus that “it ain’t about you. This is called self-care.” (08:09)
  • Blake talks about avoiding interruptions during VR-use by barricading his office door, leading to a round of self-mocking on the elaborate lengths for privacy.
  • Personal anecdotes of "sex coupon" books and how male sexuality is often commodified or gamified in relationships.

2. Twister, Sex, and the Horniness of the 1950s

Timestamps: 15:04–17:51

• The crew re-litigates the invention of Twister (1966) and why it’s the "horniest" party game.
  • Blake: "Whoever invented Twister was like, horn dog who just didn't know how to meet girls..."
  • Durst: "In the 50s, everything was way more perverted…cooking spoons were all dildos." (16:12)
  • They joke about the perceived innocence of the era vs. what was actually going on in American culture, riffing on retro perversions.

3. Porno as a Historical Constant

Timestamps: 17:52–18:36

• Durst notes that with every new media technology, sexual content arrives instantly.
  • Durst: "They do say that as soon as cameras or, like, movie cameras were invented, porno was…right there." (17:56)
  • Adam: “Horse running…and then it was like a naked chick belly dancing.”
  • Consensus: Some things never change.

4. Dad Staches & the Aesthetics of Aging

Timestamps: 18:41–23:42; 30:51–32:35

• Adam laments the consequences of mustache growth as a father, how he’s now “completely shaven everywhere else.”
  • Blake describes his own mustache/hair woes: "I went on tour with it when I was morbidly obese with the Hitler stache."
  • Durst talks about shaving his '70s stache after an audition, leading to talk about mustaches as grime magnets.
  • Adam: “That shit curdles in your stash. It smells like shit all day, dude. I don’t fuck with that.” (21:38)

5. Tarantino’s Podcast Rant & Actor Rankings

Timestamps: 32:34–47:24

• The heart of the episode: Tarantino’s recent appearance on Bret Easton Ellis’ podcast, where QT famously called Paul Dano “the limpest dick in the world,” and slammed Owen Wilson and Matthew Lillard’s acting.
  • Blake: "Imagine you're Paul Dano…look at your phone and one of the biggest directors in the history of cinema just calls you the limpest dick in the world. Oh, my God." (38:35)
  • The crew dissects whether Paul Dano really deserved the criticism, and what Tarantino meant about charisma in actors—using examples like Chris Hemsworth’s real-life presence and Daniel Day-Lewis’s on-screen intensity.
  • Notable defense of Matthew Lillard’s unique style: “I don't know if Matthew Lillard is like a good actor, like a Philip Seymour Hoffman, but he's definitely memorable. There's no one else like Matthew Lillard.” – Durst (71:19)
  • The group debates whether Tarantino is right to be so unfiltered, or whether he’s just a “huge dork.” (46:02)
  • Debate about whether “Inglorious Bastards” and “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood” are “mid,” with Adam taking the opposing, controversial position.

6. Tarantino’s Top 20 (and Movie Taste in General)

Timestamps: 47:24–60:03

• The guys go through QT’s list of favorite 21st-century films:
  • Split reactions, e.g., Toy Story 3 ("Amazing.”), Black Hawk Down ("Pretty crazy #1... seems like a #12.”), Jackass ("Jackass 2 is the funniest movie I've ever seen." – Adam (59:36))
  • Mini-reviews of “There Will Be Blood,” “Dunkirk,” “Lost in Translation,” and more.
  • Anecdotes about movie-watching routines with kids and revisiting baseball movies.
  • Running sidebars: “Have you guys laughed harder at anything than Jackass 2?”
  • Reflection on the longevity of actor careers (esp. Matthew Lillard) and the fleeting nature of Hollywood work.

7. Field of Dreams and the Male Wet Dream

Timestamps: 61:01–64:44

• Why is “Field of Dreams” such a classic for men? The guys psychoanalyze its appeal.
  • Durst: “It’s just every guy’s fantasy...the wife is like ‘We might lose the farm, but sure, go for it,’ and he gets to play catch with his dead dad.” (62:10)
  • Parental nostalgia, ghost stories, and jokes about how the message is "go crazy with your new thing, honey."

8. What Would You Do If You Couldn't Act?

Timestamps: 72:35–75:35

• Hypothetical: If acting dried up, what would the guys do?
  • Adam claims he'd do woodworking – everyone else laughs at his lack of manual skills.
  • Blake: “I would open my own breakfast spot...just cook some eggs and go around table to table.” (74:29)
  • Durst: “I'd just coach swimming. I think it's fun. Boys in speedos. Something about it, I don't know what it is.” (74:00)
  • Extended riff on why every shop teacher is missing fingers.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Masturbation in Marriage (07:10):
  Durst: "Let's just be clear here, right? You don't like me jacking off. Sorry."
  Adam: "That's it. That's explaining men's right?"

• On Sex Coupon Books (14:10):
  Blake: “A little booklet of sex coupons...I’d, like, stack them up where I was doing multiple a day, and she’s like, I can’t. You have to… it’s void. It’s void.”

• On Twister’s Origins (16:12):
  Durst: “In the 50s, everything was way more perverted...cooking spoons were all dildos.”

• On Paul Dano’s Acting (38:16):
  Blake, reading QT: “He is weak sauce man...the limpest dick in the world.”

• On Quentin Tarantino’s Persona (46:02):
  Adam: “He’s kind of a dork, dude. I think he’s revealed himself to be a dork.”

• On Jackass 2 (59:36):
  Adam: “I think Jackass 2 is the funniest movie I’ve ever seen.”

• On ‘Field of Dreams’ and Male Fantasy (62:10):
  Durst: “It’s just every guy’s fantasy...the wife is like, ‘We might lose the farm, but sure, go for it,’ and he gets to play catch with his dead dad.”

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Timestamps for Major Segments

| Timestamp | Segment/Topic Summary | |-----------|----------------------| | 03:20–14:52 | Masturbation, relationships, and "men's rights" banter | | 15:04–17:51 | Twister, sexuality, and pervy history | | 17:52–18:36 | Porno’s inevitability with new media | | 18:41–23:42 | Mustaches, masculinity, and dad-life grooming | | 32:34–47:24 | Tarantino's savage podcast appearance: "limpest dick" rant and the nature of star power | | 47:24–60:03 | QT’s favorite films, Jackass, Tarantino’s taste, movie nostalgia | | 61:01–64:44 | Field of Dreams: The ultimate "man fantasy" movie | | 72:35–75:35 | What would you do if acting dried up? Alternate careers and woodworking fails |

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Flow, Tone, and Style

The episode flows as a classic, free-rolling TII hangout: brash, often crass, introspective in spurts, but always slanted toward keeping each other laughing. There’s zero puritanical filter, plenty of retro pop culture, and a strong sense of shared history and affection beneath the playful jabs, self-deprecations, and sex jokes.

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SUMMARY

For fans of the Workaholics squad and anyone wanting a mix of real talk and raw humor about relationships, pop culture, and Hollywood, this episode delivers. Major highlights include a refreshingly honest look at men’s private (and not-so-private) rituals, a deep-dive on why Twister is the world’s horniest game, the ever-relevant link between new media and sex, and a wild unpacking of Quentin Tarantino’s latest, most controversial opinions. A must-listen if you like your movie criticism with a side of butt-wipe jokes and “men’s rights” lampooning.

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Related Episodes/Follow-up Topics:

• More on Tarantino’s actor call-outs
• Hollywood’s “10-year run” rule
• Is Jackass America’s greatest art?
• Dad staches: necessary evil or style crime?

Transcript

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[Durst]

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[Blake]

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[Adam]

Pair of new shoes and wooden dildos.

[Durst]

It's a wet dream for men everywhere.

[Blake]

Why are you getting so rock hard talking about his mustache?

[Durst]

Buckle up.

[Blake]

Oh, yeah, man. Coming in hot.

[Adam]

Good morning, TII nation.

[Blake]

Oh, it is a good morning for us. This is a squirrely early one for us. It's not that early, though. Now that we're all dads, I feel like this isn't even that early no more. This is midday.

[Durst]

But Adam, and. And you'll learn this, Adam. You'll learn this. This is the. Like you just dropped the kids off at school and now you're back home. And maybe you crawl back in bedtime.

[Adam]

Oh, or just crank, cuz you got the house to yourself.

[Durst]

Well, that's kind of. You crawl back in bed and close your eyes. Somehow you find your laptop. You open it with your eyes closed.

[Adam]

Your hand finds. Yeah, laptop. You place it right on your chest. It warms you.

[Durst]

Honey, I'm sleep jerking here.

[Blake]

Or you just mysteriously just.

[Durst]

Oh, boy. Go right to another lane.

[Blake]

Your Oculus.

[Durst]

Yeah, I'm watching. I'm watching a soccer game in Ecuador right now.

[Blake]

Baby, I'm gonna come. What? Honey, I have to jerk off to to when I'm playing the. The dancing game on the Oculus.

[Adam]

Honey, Baby, baby.

[Durst]

And she's like, oh, cool. What's the name of the dancing game? It Porn Red Step sister.

[Blake]

It's called stepsister Interracial orgy.

[Adam]

Who's playing the stepsisters versus the stepfather Stepmoms. Ver.

[Blake]

Oh, versus the Chorgoths. I'm so bad at lying.

[Durst]

She buys it where she goes. Oh, that sounds cool.

[Adam]

That's cool.

[Durst]

Wow, how inclusive. Interracial stepsisters.

[Blake]

Chloe wouldn't care at all. I, I. Have you guys ever had a girlfriend.

[Adam]

Or.

[Blake]

That was bothered by you jerking off?

[Adam]

What do you. What do you mean? Like in her presence or like.

[Blake]

Well, yeah, I mean, no one wants to be just jerked off her in the kitchen when you're putting some cream.

[Adam]

Cheese on the bagel, you're Weinstein.

[Durst]

You mean like knowing that you jerk off sometimes? Is this what you're saying?

[Blake]

Yes. No. I've. I've seen online that people are like.

[Durst]

Two Minutes in, we're already getting to it.

[Blake]

I've seen.

I've seen online where girls are like, my husband or boyfriend or whatever was a porn addict and he was jerking off all the time and it was ruining our family. And then. And then it's like later, him being like, yeah, I've life is so much better. And then it's like shows him like playing pickleball or whatever, right?

[Durst]

He's got grip something.

[Blake]

I think this is my algorithm. He's like telling me like, hey, man, maybe you're. Maybe you're cranking down too.

[Durst]

Maybe.

[Adam]

Maybe get outside.

[Durst]

I have yet to see that.

[Blake]

So know. I've known. I've had friends that are like high school friends that they're suddenly. They're like, yeah, I don't jerk off anymore. And I'm like, say what now? And I know it's because that their girlfriends or wives, in that case, it was a wife.

[Adam]

Ah, they put the clamp down.

[Blake]

Said he did. She didn't like him drinking off that much.

[Durst]

I mean, well, there's levels to this.

[Adam]

There's levels to this first off, for sure. Right?

[Durst]

But like, let's just be clear here, right?

[Adam]

Let's be.

[Durst]

Yeah, let's. Let's. Maybe we need to explain men. Men's rights.

[Blake]

I would love it. This is what this podcast is about. And this is important.

[Adam]

Huh?

[Durst]

You don't like me jacking off. Sorry.

[Blake]

That's life.

[Adam]

That's it.

[Durst]

That's it.

[Blake]

Yeah, dude.

[Adam]

That's explaining men's right?

[Durst]

And then, and then you just close the door slowly. I'll be in here. Sorry.

[Blake]

Oops, sorry.

[Adam]

Did I do that?

[Blake]

Why do you think I take four 45 minute long shits every day by the Blake?

[Durst]

I think Blake either said this or tweeted it, but you said this like 10 years ago when it was. You hear like the apple, like, volume going, going down. You know your roommate's about to go to town.

[Adam]

That's true.

[Blake]

I liked the rhyme to that too.

[Durst]

So accurate.

[Blake]

Apple volume. Volume's going down. You know your roommate's going to town.

[Adam]

Absolutely. There's your T shirt.

[Durst]

Yeah, I mean, what. What.

The thing that I think people, girls or. Or even boyfriends need to realize. It ain't about you.

[Adam]

Thank you.

[Blake]

It ain't about you.

[Adam]

This is called self care.

[Blake]

Yeah. They don't like you watching the pornos. And I think that's.

[Adam]

You think jealousy.

[Blake]

If you were just jerking off and you're. You're just.

Using your brain. But I would say even using your Brain might be worse, because then.

[Durst]

Worse. Way worse.

[Blake]

Because then you have to think about ex girlfriends or things from your past.

[Durst]

Inventing characters.

Actually, hang on a second. Blake. Is that what you're doing?

[Adam]

I'm building a building world.

[Blake]

A model.

[Durst]

So, like, weird science. Every time.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

You turn on that song to jack off, it's like, weird.

[Blake]

Weird science.

[Adam]

What are you doing in there?

I know you're not watching the Weird Science Weird Science series from the Sci Fi Channel. There's no way.

[Blake]

Blake, you gotta keep that weird science song.

[Durst]

That was on usa.

[Adam]

Oh, was it? My bad.

[Durst]

I just want to make sure nobody slides in your DMs.

[Blake]

Weird science.

Yeah. Okay, well, good. I'm glad we're not. Well, no, because my. Because Chloe actively doesn't care. She'll pretend like she. She doesn't.

[Adam]

I dare you to jerk off right now.

[Blake]

She'll pretend like she doesn't know that I'm jerking off sometimes.

Like the other day.

[Durst]

That's actually above and beyond. Why is she doing that?

[Adam]

I'm not. I'm not seeing this.

[Blake]

I dusted this boy off, charged it up.

[Durst]

It's a boy, huh?

[Blake]

Yeah, it's a boy. He helps dump.

[Durst]

Sit on my face here, boy.

[Blake]

He helps me.

[Adam]

And you're holding up the Oculus Rift. The Oculus Rift for all our listeners.

[Blake]

There's no lock to my office door.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Adam]

Okay, can we work on that?

[Durst]

Did you go, like, 1950s and, like, put the chair under the knob?

[Blake]

No, but I have a tiny step stool that I rest my feet on under my desk.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Blake]

And I put that and my backpack in front of the door. I've never done before.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Blake]

Never done so. I've never done so.

[Adam]

You barricaded the door.

[Durst]

I'm starting to figure out why. She pretends to.

She's like, I'm hearing furniture move upstairs. I gotta pretend Adam has stacked up.

[Adam]

Dressers and tables up the door.

[Durst]

And.

[Adam]

And Chloe is just shoulder checking the door. Like, I know what you're doing in there. It's just fortified.

[Blake]

She would be like, I don't know what you're doing in there. This is totally fine. Yeah, this is fine.

[Adam]

Why is the dresser in front of the door?

[Blake]

And then. But then I'm like, she knocked.

[Adam]

Here's Chloe.

[Blake]

But the. The. The sounds emanated from this.

[Durst]

You okay?

[Blake]

It doesn't sound that loud when you're outside of the little Oculus world, sure. But in the Oculus world, it's. It's pretty all encompassing.

[Adam]

Sure. Hey. Hey. You got some points yes.

[Blake]

Points.

[Adam]

Thank you.

[Blake]

Thank you, God. Dear God. It's been so long since I've got.

[Adam]

That was a good one too.

[Durst]

Pissing sitting there.

[Blake]

So I ripped the headset off. I go. She's like, what is all this fringe drop? Like, I don't even know I got it. I was just rearranging. So I don't know. And you're embarrassed, right? You're a little embarrassed.

[Durst]

There's load all over your hand.

[Adam]

Yeah. Your tail is tucked between your legs.

[Blake]

Or not your hand covered in your own spit. This is disgusting.

[Durst]

Goodbye to my.

[Blake]

But then I had the. I had the. The goggle marked just on my head.

[Durst]

The goggle.

[Adam]

Goggle.

[Durst]

Oh, I was just water. I was a skiing.

[Adam]

Honey, you do it outside your sunburnt as the oculus.

[Blake]

Do it outside. Do it outside. That's the most insane place to do it.

[Durst]

Feel the breeze.

[Adam]

You look like you just got done snowboarding for five days. You're just blasting.

[Blake]

It was bad. And then she acted like nothing. She's like, oh, okay.

[Adam]

Well, should have said it.

[Blake]

I was gonna ask you about this sconce.

[Adam]

I was gonna ask you of what preschool you thought should go to, but I'll come back to it. Yeah.

[Blake]

I'll put a pin on that.

[Durst]

I'll circle back.

[Adam]

You know what?

[Durst]

Yeah, I'm a circle back.

[Blake]

I'm going to circle back.

[Durst]

Eod, Adam. The way you're. The way you're painting it in your household. I'm starting to see why she has to pretend. Okay. Because it seems like it's like midday when people are in the house.

[Blake]

Well, it wasn't people. It was just Chloe. Right? Not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, what. What am I. She's always here. There's no getting away.

[Durst]

Oh, yeah.

[Blake]

She doesn't go anywhere. Very shaggy.

[Adam]

Welcome to the husband.

[Durst]

You know what you got to do for Christmas or whatever. You guys celebrate Christmas?

[Adam]

Whatever denomination. You can say Christmas.

[Blake]

Say Christmas, dude.

[Durst]

No. But I don't know what you celebrate. I'm not really sure.

[Blake]

You do know what I celebrate. You do? You. You've known me for like 25 years.

[Adam]

At this point we find out dirt refuses to say Christmas.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

Xmas is one of my favorite holidays.

[Adam]

The price back in Christmas, please.

[Blake]

So, all right, this is weird.

[Durst]

You get. You get passes where you're like. You can hand her, like, hour long. Go hit the road. Go to Starbucks.

[Adam]

Right.

[Durst]

Tickets.

[Adam]

Oh, you hit the road pass.

[Durst]

Hit the road, pass.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Durst]

So it's like, honey, she gives you 20 of those.

[Adam]

You know what Christmas is Around the corner. This is a great gift idea from Der.

[Blake]

Yeah, this is a great gift.

[Durst]

And whatever you celebrate in the road.

[Blake]

Is a get, like, hit the brakes. And the gift is, get out of the house.

[Adam]

Take your ass to Starbucks car.

[Durst]

They're saying, here, I'm giving you 20. Tell me to goes so you can.

[Adam]

I give you permission to leave the house so you don't have to listen to me bang myself.

[Blake]

Oh, so it's a gift idea for me? Yeah.

[Durst]

No, she gives it to you to give back to her. I know it sounds very confusing.

[Blake]

Yeah, yeah. Now I understand it.

[Durst]

But it's work. But it's worked for 10 years in my house. Does.

[Blake]

Does it. Do you do something like that?

[Durst]

Oh, that'd be foul.

[Blake]

Yeah, that's. That's crazy, honey.

[Durst]

They're called Hit the Road, Jackson. Hit the Road Jack Offs. There's something there.

[Blake]

I remember a girlfriend, no points. Many, many, many, many, many moons ago, she gave me, like, a little booklet of, like, sex coupons. And, like, you could. It was like, throughout the year, you get 20 blowjob coupons. But then I just use them. I would. I'd, like, stack them up where I was doing multiple a day, and she's like, I can't. You have to.

[Durst]

Yeah, she's exhausted.

[Blake]

It's void. It's void.

[Adam]

I'm gonna play the whole hand.

[Blake]

It's void. I was just like, well, I'll run 20 in a row. Here we go.

[Adam]

If I turn in four hand jobs, can it turn into an anal?

[Blake]

Well, dude, the coupons, if you. If you could use them whenever you want them. I'm. I want them.

[Adam]

You're like, adam, we're at dinner.

[Durst]

Adam, I'm not her. You don't have to, like, yell at me.

[Blake]

I'm not yelling, dude. I'm just explaining myself. And when I get riled up, I get a little louder.

[Durst]

I do like the idea of you going, well, then what are the. What are the ground rules here, honey? If I can'.

[Adam]

I like you calling your high school girlfriend honey, too.

[Blake]

That's freaking cool, honey. Sweetie cow, pal.

[Adam]

That is really cool. That's a great idea, though. I like that little, like, sex coupon booklet.

[Durst]

I'm gonna send you some of those sex dice.

[Adam]

Anything to spice up my bedroom. Come on, man.

[Durst]

You guys, I'm gonna send you naked Twister.

[Blake]

Spice up your life.

[Durst]

Hello.

[Blake]

Spice up your life. Pizza.

[Durst]

Pizza. Twister in middle school was fucking right.

[Blake]

That's about as close as you could.

[Durst]

Get when you were doing Twister with girls. It was like, whoever invented Twister was like, horn dog. Horn dog who just didn't know how to meet girls and was like, oh, well, guess what? I'm gonna middle school them.

[Adam]

You don't.

[Blake]

Come on.

[Adam]

You don't think it was some, like, innocent 50s game? When did Twister get invented?

[Blake]

Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But no, no, no, dude.

[Durst]

In the 50s, everything was way more perverted.

[Blake]

People were so horny in the 50s. Dude.

[Adam]

You think?

[Durst]

Yeah, they.

[Blake]

Were so horny in the.

[Durst]

50S, cooking spoons were all dildos.

[Adam]

Wait.

[Blake]

Yes, that's exactly right.

[Durst]

In the 50s, if you ever ate food in the 80s 50s, you were eating coochie.

[Blake]

Basically, you're eating coochie spoons.

[Durst]

Smegma.

[Adam]

That Betty. Betty Crocker cookies were smacking, bro.

[Durst]

Oh, yeah.

[Blake]

So the game was invented in 1966. A little late. Almost 60. I feel like they. That's wild. Yeah. You could have waited three years, and it would have been hilarious.

[Adam]

Wait to drop it.

[Durst]

He knew what he was doing.

[Blake]

Yeah. You know, the innocence of it. I think there was an innocence factor there. I bet when he invented it, he was like, oh, this is a fun game. And then as soon as he saw. I hope he was really, really, really, really Christian, and he invented it. And then he sees a bunch of middle schoolers playing it the day. First day, and he was like, what have I done?

[Durst]

Right?

[Blake]

And they're.

[Durst]

And people are just scissoring. And he goes, dear God, what have I done? What happened?

[Blake]

Yeah. He immediately drops on his knees, starts praying, what have I done? What have I done?

[Durst]

He's like, I can't wait for whatever holiday I celebrate coming up. I'm getting this, you know, Christmas.

[Adam]

You know what he was saying?

[Durst]

But whatever it could be.

[Adam]

You know what he. No one knows. This is a big Happy Holidays.

[Blake]

Yeah, probably probably Christmas. More than likely.

[Adam]

Happy holiday to all.

[Blake]

Yeah. I wonder if Twister that sort of set off the. Where we are today. We're just. I'm putting on Oculus riffs to jerk off midday. All because of Twister. That son of a bitch. It all goes back, set us down a path. I mean, total perversion.

[Adam]

Real men, a genius.

[Durst]

I just want to keep, you know, pushing this.

[Blake]

Oh, please, push it.

[Durst]

Really? They do say that as soon as cameras or, like, movie cameras were invented, porno was, like, right there. They were like, okie dokie were taking pictures of naked chicks. Almost immediately, it was like a horse running. And then it was like a naked chick belly dancing.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

Yep.

[Adam]

Absolutely.

[Blake]

That's right.

[Adam]

I've seen that footage. It's still.

[Blake]

Well, that still goes.

[Durst]

It's in the retro category.

[Adam]

It still goes. It still slaps.

[Blake]

Slaps, dude. As the kids say. I think a decade ago.

[Durst]

Do they? Yeah.

[Blake]

Yeah. I feel like I've lost the thread on what kids have said.

[Durst]

It still slaps, as young dads says.

[Blake]

Yeah, still.

[Adam]

That's dad core. Now that's kind of cool. Our sling is just dad core.

[Blake]

Speaking of dad core, your stash is darker. Are you dying it for the movie?

[Adam]

I. Well, I mean, I took a shower, but it's just. It's fucking.

[Durst]

Okay. And what do you think that might have done?

[Adam]

It's just thick. I haven't shaved it in a long time, but they. They do fill it in a little bit up here.

[Blake]

Okay. So that is. I remember the last time you had a mustache. It was much blonder looking. I thought.

[Durst]

Well, maybe not.

[Adam]

I also think that. When's the last time I saw you? Two weeks ago.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Adam]

This is a lot of bro. My mustache grows fast now.

[Blake]

Well, is it because you shaved? Because you had a mustache for a long time.

[Adam]

Right.

[Blake]

And then remember, I did not ever look like that.

[Adam]

That's true. That is true.

[Blake]

And I doubt you ever trimmed it or did any sort of maintenance other than keeping it out of your mouth.

[Adam]

Yeah. Okay, fair enough.

[Durst]

Adam is coming for you.

[Adam]

Hel.

[Blake]

No, no, no, no.

[Durst]

I'm just adding answers now.

[Blake]

I'm pissed now. No, because I. Dude, I won a mustache. And. And you remember how my mustache grew? Where it grew here, here. But right here.

[Durst]

Birthday. I almost posted that picture. And I was like, you're opening a door that does not need to be open.

[Blake]

It was. It was blonde. It was like. Or, no, no, it was blonde down here, but dark in the middle. So when the light hit just right. In person, it didn't look like that. But then in photographs, it looked like I had a Hitler stash.

[Durst]

Every photo looked like it was rough.

[Blake]

And I went on tour with it when I was morbidly obese with the Hitler stache. It was a bad time in my life.

[Adam]

Well, you had the sideburns to kind of balance it, so it was kind of like hillbilly Hitler. It was interesting. Yeah, it was really interesting.

[Blake]

That's kind of what pulled it all together. If I didn't have those sideburns and I was just a fat Hitler. That's depressing. That's depressing.

[Adam]

Well, okay, so.

[Blake]

So I'm wondering for. In the case of your mustache, I'm wondering if I were to. Since I did that, should I grow it out, Shave it? Grow it out, shave it. And then I can get to where you're at.

[Adam]

It's possible. Now that you are a father, I feel like dad stache. Dad stache is a real thing.

[Blake]

Okay.

[Adam]

I think. I think.

[Durst]

Can I tell you something?

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

I'm shaving mine.

[Blake]

Whoa.

[Adam]

You're out of here.

[Durst]

I kept it on yesterday for like a. A tape I sent in an audition. But I'm.

[Adam]

I'm shaving it and they're like, God damn.

[Durst]

No, no, I just. I saved it for that cuz I'm supposed to be like in the 70s or something, but I'm like, got shave it.

[Blake]

Go. God.

[Adam]

Are you the inventor of. Are you the inventor of Twister in this movie?

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Durst]

I will say, though, I think in this season of, like, sicknesses and colds and blowing your nose.

[Adam]

Can't have it.

[Durst]

Can't. The boogers in the mustache.

[Adam]

It's a thing.

[Blake]

Yeah, it's a thing.

[Durst]

It's a thing. It's a genuine thing.

[Blake]

It's a real thing. And also, do you get all kinds of food in it?

[Durst]

A little bit, yeah.

[Blake]

Like when you taste. You're like. You go to lick your lips and you taste your mustache a little bit, and it tastes like what you ate for lunch or whatever.

[Adam]

You know what really stays? The smell. Yeah, the smell. If you, like, have anything dairy or, like, eat a piece of pie with whipped cream. Oh, man, that shit curdles in your stash. It smells like shit all day, dude. I don't fuck with that.

[Durst]

So specific.

[Blake]

Fucking yuck.

[Adam]

That's my least favorite thing, is having whipped cream with a mustache.

[Durst]

That's your least favorite thing?

[Adam]

Yes, absolutely.

[Blake]

In the whole world, dude. Anders, am I off base here? Insane that his mustache is bigger and more beautiful than it's ever been mine.

[Adam]

Thank you, dude. Is that a compliment?

[Blake]

No, no. Yours looks great. You have a. A grade A. Sorry. Tom Selleck, elite level.

[Durst]

You're saying? Hey, Ders, are. Isn't. Blake's. Got it.

[Blake]

Hey, Durs, Isn't Blake's mustache the best it's ever been? I love it.

[Durst]

Yeah, it's good.

[Adam]

Well, here's why. Here's one of the reasons that is standing out to you.

[Durst]

Showbiz.

[Adam]

I'm completely shaven everywhere else. It's just my mustache everywhere else. And I took it all the way down.

[Durst]

It's for the roll. You ain't got a mustache up top.

And bottom.

[Adam]

I am clown Clean shaven everywhere else. Yeah, right under my nose.

[Durst]

Yeah, that helps.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

When you shave everything else, it accentuates it.

[Adam]

It accentuates.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

No, it looks strong. Looks wide.

[Blake]

Thank you.

[Adam]

And you guys know I was coming from a. A very shaven place as you made fun of my face without a mustache a few weeks ago.

[Blake]

Didn't like it. It really threw me off.

[Adam]

A lot of people didn't like it.

[Blake]

You're a handsome gentleman.

[Adam]

Okay. Thank you.

[Blake]

God damn my boy. In certain circles.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Durst]

And Adam?

[Adam]

The arctic.

[Durst]

To be fair though, Adam has not been able to jack off in about six hours.

[Adam]

So he's in some circles. The arctic circles. There are no arctic circles.

[Blake]

You are.

[Durst]

That's a good one.

[Blake]

Yeah, that's points. That's okay. In some circles. The arctic circle. You are good looking. Yes. Points.

[Adam]

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[Durst]

So let me ask, how's your holiday shopping going? I know it can be hard to find the perfect gift for someone. I mean, when you know someone really well, it's a lot easier. But when you don't, it's a lot harder. Right, Adam?

[Adam]

Yep.

[Durst]

But I've got a tip to help you out there.

[Blake]

What's that?

[Durst]

Get to know them better.

[Blake]

Oh, yeah, that's it. And the best way to do that is on Facebook. You can learn more about them. You can discover their interests and hobbies through Facebook groups. Right, Ders? Yep. Maybe they love dogs. Maybe they love crochet. Everybody's different, right, Ders?

[Adam]

Yep.

[Blake]

But you'll never know how unless you get to know them.

[Durst]

And not only can you use Facebook to get to know someone better, you can use Facebook marketplace to find the perfect gift once you do. Right, Adam?

[Blake]

Correct.

[Durst]

And by the perfect gift, I mean a thoughtful gift. One that shows you know the person even when you maybe didn't know them that well before.

[Blake]

That's how you connect with people. That's how Facebook helps you connect with people. And a little connection goes a long way. Let's reconnect this holiday season with Facebook.

[Adam]

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[Blake]

I just got so used to you having the mustache and kind of a not a great mustache. So now that you do have a good mustache, it makes me go, do I grow the bad mustache of the crew and I'm the one with the bad mustache?

[Durst]

Bad.

[Blake]

Yeah, could be kind of fun.

[Durst]

Just grow it out.

[Adam]

Yeah, give it a shot.

[Blake]

But dur is shaving his. So then what's the point?

[Adam]

You know, I'm excited for Ders to shave his.

[Durst]

Well, I'll pass it. I'll shave mine and then send it your way.

[Adam]

I love it, but it is a cookie duster. Dude, you got a biggin this.

[Blake]

It makes you look a decade older than you are because there's so much white in it. When your hair isn't really that white. I mean, you don't. You have hardly Any gray Before you.

[Adam]

Shave it, can you just ferment it, please?

[Durst]

Please, ferment it just for a minute. You want me to, like, comb a color into it?

[Adam]

I want you to comb a color, yeah.

[Blake]

Why are you getting so rock hard talking about his mustache?

[Durst]

I. Adam, you're throwing stones in glass houses here, man.

[Adam]

Please, I need it. I need that file sent to me, please.

[Durst]

But what color would I comb it? Like, the one that matches me or you want me to go, dude, dark black.

[Adam]

Dude, dark black. Please, please, dude.

[Blake]

I feel like if you did that, you would get a call from Paul Thomas Anderson immediately saying we're doing There Will Be Blood too.

[Adam]

Right?

[Blake]

You would.

[Adam]

What's his name? What's the dude's name in the movie Plane Spew?

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Adam]

Oh, I pulled that out. I think I'm right.

[Blake]

Yeah, I think that is right.

[Adam]

Yeah, It's a bagel.

[Blake]

I watched that the other night and.

[Durst]

He'S like, we're doing a whole thing about drinking the milkshake. The milkshake gets in the mustache and curdles.

[Adam]

This is a hot topic too. Go ahead.

[Blake]

So I watched it the. I literally watched it two nights ago because Quentin Tarantino came out with his list of favorite movies from the 21st century.

[Adam]

Yes.

[Blake]

And I was like, oh, you know what? I've never seen There Will Be Blood. I've never seen it.

[Adam]

What the hell?

[Durst]

That's kind of cool.

[Blake]

I think I've only seen. I've walked in on, like, on people watching it, Right. And I've sat down and watched like.

[Adam]

30 minute chunks of it on VR.

[Blake]

Or never watched the whole thing.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Blake]

So I watched the whole thing.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Blake]

And then you know how it is when you have a kid and you have to go to bed and you're like, God damn, he's gonna get up so early in this movie. So we stopped it and then we watched the last, like 35 minutes the next night. And in that time, that's when Quentin Tarantino came out with. Paul Dano is the worst actor in sag. He's a limp dick loser.

Yeah, he's called him a limp dick. What is the exact quote here? Todd, find it for us.

[Durst]

So I. I subscribed to the podcast. I listened to Brady Sonellis podcast. So I heard it.

[Adam]

Oh, is that where he. That's where he did it?

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

That's where this is all coming from, is that he showed up on Brett Easton Ellis's podcast. The writer of American Psycho.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

And he was like, we were just gonna do something, but I like him. He goes, I just showed up and I've got my favorite 20 movies of the last 25 years. And Brett's like, oh, I didn't ask for that. I wish you told me. And then I would have mine and we could have a thing. And he's like, don't worry about it. Like, let's just do this.

[Blake]

Don't worry about it. This is my thing.

[Durst]

But ironically, it's been, like, the biggest fucking thing ever. Because it's Quentin Tarantino, one of our greatest, saying what movies matter and what movies don't over the last 20 years. Or I should say they're his favorite, right? They're not the best.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

And then he just absolutely shits on Paul Dano and Owen Wilson.

[Adam]

Dude, Owen Wilson got it, too.

[Blake]

Oh, I didn't see that.

[Durst]

And then Matthew Lillard.

[Adam]

Okay. Now he's a real. Now he's irrelevant to me.

[Durst]

What happened that these dudes pissed you off?

[Adam]

That's weird.

That's weird. You can't dunk on Lillard. Dude's a ledge, bro.

[Durst]

He's our Shaggy.

[Adam]

Absolutely. He's the shag man.

[Blake]

So I'm watching the movie, and then I come back after hearing Quentin Tarantino on Dog On. And it did kind of affect the performance. Affect the performance for me.

[Adam]

Well, yeah.

[Blake]

Then I'm watching it through Quentin Tarantino's, like, hateful eyes when I thought he was doing a pretty good job. Although Daniel Day Lewis is so great.

[Durst]

He's chewing it up. Yeah, you can't. Who's gonna battle that?

[Adam]

You can't battle rap him.

[Blake]

He's a absolute monster. So it is hard to go toe to toe. And Paul was pretty young in There Will Be Blood.

[Durst]

Yeah, perfect.

[Blake]

So you're like, okay, he's. He's a kid. It's like, this is. This is wild to dunk on him this hard.

[Durst]

But I never liked Paul Dano's character in There Will Be Blood. I don't know.

[Adam]

Well, he's a really pathetic person.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

Yeah. But, like, I. I feel like. Because I think Tarantino goes, oh, you know who'd be good is the guy.

[Blake]

Austin Butler. Austin Butler.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Durst]

And so what I think he's saying is. What I think he's saying is that.

[Blake]

If he wishes he was hotter. Yeah, I wish. Yeah. He's like, I wish Paul Dana was hotter.

[Durst]

I know. I wish that character was hotter, more charismatic.

[Adam]

Really?

[Durst]

Because. Yes, because I think what they're saying in this is that there's, like, people who have natural charisma. And then there's just dogs. And people who have natural charisma can get a following, but you will always get eaten up by that dog.

[Blake]

Okay.

[Durst]

Daniel Day Lewis character is that dog who's like. Who needs to feel genuinely threatened by that character. By being like this little hot young guy who's got a connection to God and everyone's like, going to his church. I gotta take this guy out.

[Blake]

I see. Yeah. When you put it in that light, I do understand what you're saying. I'm like.

[Durst]

And I don't know who that actor is. Yeah.

[Blake]

Because I don't know if it's Austin Butler or not. But there is something to be said about, like a good looking person who just. The room he walks in, and all of a sudden the room just goes to him. Like, remember when we saw Chris Hemsworth at that party when workaholics first.

[Durst]

This is my story.

[Blake]

No, no, no, no. We saw him together. You saw him at a house party. But I'm saying when we saw him together at I. It was some, like, Comic Con.

[Adam]

We were at Comic Con.

[Durst]

I think this was at the MTV Awards, maybe, because we were in a back room. Taylor Swift was also in that room.

[Adam]

Hello.

[Durst]

And they were both taller than everybody, and it was like towering. You guys should right now.

[Adam]

Yeah. Make something.

[Blake]

And I remember he walked in and the room, like, turned and sort of was just like, holy. Like, look at this person. I do understand what you're saying of like, yes, Paul Dano is not that guy. He's actually kind of an off putting looking person where you're like, huh, huh, huh. He looks different. But that being said, I liked. I liked his performance. And he's.

[Durst]

He's amazing. He's not a bad actor.

[Blake]

He's a good. He's a very good actor. I think.

[Durst]

I do think it needed to have this, like, young, vibrant young person who just. It has the innate magnetic. Whatever we call that, who is genuinely threatening. It can't just be some guy.

[Blake]

So this is what Quentin said. He said, okay, about Paul Dano. He said he is weak sauce man, which is hilarious.

[Adam]

That's dad core, dude.

[Blake]

Yeah, he's weak sauce, man. He's a weak sister. Austin Butler would have been wonderful in that role. And then he's talking about Daniel Day Lewis. He goes, so you put him, Daniel Day Lewis with the weakest male actor in sag. The limp dick in the world. Whoa. The limpest dick in the world.

[Adam]

Dude.

[Blake]

Imagine you're Paul Dano and you wake up the next morning, you just Wake up and you look at your phone and one of the biggest directors in the history of cinema just calls you the limpest dick in the world. Oh, my God.

[Durst]

It's got to be personal.

[Blake]

That's rough.

[Adam]

It's got to be personal. Or they have a. Or they have like a film coming out that we don't know about and this is to stir something up. It just seems so left field.

[Durst]

Dano. Dano needs to play Tarantino in a movie now.

[Adam]

Yeah, that would be kind of sweet revenge.

[Durst]

And by the way, Dano in. Was that your Tarantino?

[Adam]

Yeah, Very good. Kind of Jay Leno after every sentence. Just kind of Jay Leno. But I like it.

[Blake]

Yeah. All right. Yeah, it kind of was Jay Leno. The same guy to me.

[Durst]

Giant Dano in Escape at Dannemora.

[Adam]

I also think Dano in the Batman. I thought his Riddler is great.

[Blake]

Dude.

[Durst]

Yeah, he was good. And dude, do we even need to go back to Girl Next Door?

[Adam]

I would love to.

[Durst]

He was one of the other friends. That movie is the.

[Adam]

And I never saw the Beach Boy movie, but I know Kyle would be on here being like, oh, he was great in that. And I really need to see that.

[Blake]

Yeah. The Beach Boy movie. I don't even know.

[Durst]

Yeah, no, I was saying who Kyle.

[Blake]

But yeah, it's called Love and Mercy. Thank you.

[Adam]

I really want to play Brian Wilson.

[Durst]

And then he bags on Owen Wilson. He goes, I don't like Owen Wilson. Because he liked. He named Midnight in Paris as one of his favorite 20 movies. And he goes, and you know, I hate Owen Wilson, but I like the movie. And then I watched it again. I kind of like Owen Wilson after that. Like dog.

[Blake]

Oh, that's right.

[Adam]

But people are firing back on Quentin.

[Blake]

Well, people are sort of miscast. You see some. Sometimes you watch a movie and you're like, wow, that's such a great actor. But they're so not right for this role. Yeah. Or like, and. And it's happening a lot nowadays where the. They'll cast 50 year old actors.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

In the roles that should be for a 35 year old guy. Shots fired.

[Durst]

Story wise.

[Blake]

Story wise. Yeah.

[Durst]

Where you're like, this is not the story for a 55 year old person.

[Blake]

Yeah. They're like, it's weird that you're just getting married and just talking about kids and you're feeling 55 years old.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

You're like, maybe you should have started a few years ago.

[Adam]

You're just going to college. Tommy Lee Jones is frat boy.

[Durst]

I think that people and look, we know how the business Tommy Lee Jones.

[Blake]

Is buying school supplies. I do.

[Durst]

I do love the idea of the. It used to be reserved for people who are about 30 when they're like, I'm going to my 10 year high school anniversary or whatever. Or high school reunion reunion.

[Adam]

Anthony Hopkins in the Bachelor party.

[Durst]

And by the way, when, when you' 28 going to your 10 year high school reunion, you might have not gotten where you want to go yet.

[Adam]

Right.

[Durst]

But when you're 50 and the movie is about you going back to your high school reunion.

[Adam]

Ian McKellen is the Bachelor.

[Durst]

What have you not solved at 50?

[Blake]

Well, but also, I mean, is that movie even funnier? Like everyone is just like very well established and they're like, wait, you guys got married and had kids and had careers fucking.

[Durst]

But it's specifically funny for that reason. As opposed to the. The one that we all know, which is like, oh, like I haven't gotten to where I want to be. How's it gonna stack up? And then you go back and there's like the rich guy who you find out at the end of the night actually didn't make. He's got a fake Rolex. Yeah, you.

[Adam]

Right, Right, you. Hello.

[Durst]

Like, dude, we just. We were on the same soccer team. Here we are. You're not rich. I thought you were. It's a fake Rolex. It looks real.

[Adam]

Patrick Stewart is the freshman.

[Durst]

Is that the Star Trek dude?

[Adam]

Professor X B, Come on, let's go.

[Blake]

I'm pissed now.

[Durst]

I liked him when he had a little bit of hair on the sides.

[Blake]

Morgan Freeman is your college roommate.

[Adam]

The roommate dorm days.

[Blake]

This is what Quinton to go back. What? Because he said some crazy shit he says. I'm not saying about Paul Dano in There Will Be Blood. I'm not saying he's giving a terrible performance after he just called him the limpest dick of the world.

[Adam]

Yeah. Huh. Okay.

[Blake]

And he added moments later. I'm saying he's giving a non entity performance.

[Durst]

You lose worse.

[Adam]

You're making me look up words. God damn. That's a burn.

[Blake]

I don't care for him. I don't care for Owen Wilson. I don't care for Matthew Lillard. Dude, crazy. Crazy. One, two, three, punch.

[Adam]

What is on this dude's mind?

[Durst]

They just named Blake's Mount Rushmore.

[Adam]

I know. What the fuck?

[Blake]

Yeah. I mean, honestly. Honestly. Well, is it because you kind of look like all three of those guys combined?

[Adam]

Yes, very much so. Yeah, absolutely. Why? I just. Was he on coke?

[Durst]

Like, and how did you describe Paul Dano's looks earlier?

[Adam]

Yeah. Sexy. In some circles, that would be off putting. Yeah.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

Off putting.

[Adam]

Was he on coke? What was the vibe?

[Durst]

No, he is fully just leaning in. I mean, Adam's reading it with emphasis. He says it with emphasis and just like, flippantly, like.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

You know, and I don't like that. I've never had. I'd have. Like, he's a bad.

[Adam]

I mean, he's got. He's got verbal diarrhea. When Quentin fires up, you can't stop him.

[Durst]

No, but this here. Here's the thing about this podcast, is that neither of these guys care.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

No one is writing. They're not. They're in their 60s. They're at the height of. Or they're. They are icons of their crafts. They don't care if they go.

[Blake]

They don't care.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

I didn't like this movie. I didn't think this actor was that good. I think that the director up here, like. And I'm not saying they're always right.

[Blake]

But it's their opinion, and it's kind of cool.

[Durst]

Yeah. And in. In this business now where everyone has a podcast and we all, like, like, work with each other.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

We pull punches all the time about, like, what movies we did not like or thought were bad and didn't think actors were as good as people say they are. Whatever.

[Adam]

Yeah, but I mean, he. But he's. To me, he's not addressing the elephant in the room. You know what I mean?

[Blake]

Like, that's like a.

[Adam]

That's a very debatable thing. Daniel's good. Fudgeing Lillard is great. Owen Wilson.

[Blake]

Yes. To. To you.

[Adam]

Why are those guys. Top of mind? Like, why do you have. That's fucking weird.

[Durst]

Pulling Lillard out is wild.

[Blake]

Is wild.

[Adam]

That's weird.

[Blake]

Well, one, because he's like, Paul Dano and Owen Wilson are huge stars.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

Matthew Lillard isn't.

[Durst]

That's what I'm saying. Like, Lillard must have, like, dissed him.

[Adam]

At some point, Right?

[Blake]

It's. It's pretty crazy because Matthew Lillard is not that big of a star anymore. He had his run in the early 2000s, but now he pops up and he's a character actor and he will pop up and things. I've always liked him personally, and he's always good. He's always good.

[Adam]

But I feel like he just signed on to something.

[Durst]

Like, there's a big role like Landman or some shit.

[Adam]

Something's coming up for Lillard that I heard. So Maybe that was just. He read the trades or. I don't know, like, why.

[Durst]

I do want you to have Google alerts for Matthew.

[Adam]

I do, bro.

Ever since SLC punk, I'm in.

[Blake]

Me too. SLC punk rock.

[Durst]

It's rough. By the way, Tarantino's list is. Is off. Yeah, his list is off.

[Blake]

And by the way, what is his list? Todd, give us his list.

[Durst]

It's his favorite movies, so you can't call him.

[Adam]

Wrong. He's kind of a dork. He's kind of a dork, dude. I think he's revealed himself to be a dork.

[Durst]

Kind of a dork. He's the biggest dork ever.

[Blake]

But, like, he's a huge dork. But that's his thing, is he's a dork for cinema and he's. I mean, his movies rule, dude.

[Durst]

Like, he put a bunch of his friends. They're. They're.

[Blake]

Some of them.

[Durst]

Yeah, he put a bunch of his friends. Some of them.

[Adam]

If you're gonna. If you're gonna hold them up to Dano's performance at that level and be like, I'm looking down at some. A lot of Quentin Tarantino movies are mid. Dude, they're mid.

[Durst]

What?

[Blake]

Okay.

[Adam]

Glorious Bastards.

[Blake]

Mid.

[Durst]

Inglorious.

So I want you. When's the last time you watched it? You've watched it once, and that was 20 years ago. Am I wrong?

[Adam]

And it was mid.

[Blake]

It didn't come out 20 years ago.

[Durst]

But what year did it come out out?

[Adam]

It has one scene that I, I.

[Blake]

It's.

[Adam]

The movie can exist because of the first scene. I'll take it. Okay, two scenes. The bar scene as well. But the overall movie. Mid.

[Blake]

Mid.

[Durst]

It came out in 2009, so.

[Adam]

All right, mid. What was his last one? Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. Mid. Mid.

[Durst]

Watch it. Hang on a second. Blake. Blake, watch. Watch it again and I promise you, you'll go. Not mid.

[Adam]

I know it well. I know it very well. There's two amazing scenes. Two amazing scenes. The bar scene and the first scene with the people under the floorboards. Those are incredible scenes.

[Durst]

Movie theater scene.

[Adam]

No, the movie theater scene can go away.

[Durst]

It's not for you.

[Adam]

It's not for me, mate.

[Blake]

It's not for me. No mo.

[Durst]

I will say that on this list, he's like, cabin Fever. And I'm like, well, that's your homie, right? Yeah, like, you just like.

[Adam]

He's a cabin boy now.

[Blake]

I'm listening.

[Durst]

Cabin boy. Now we're talking.

[Blake]

But people do like Cabin Fever.

[Durst]

I'm not Saying cabin fever is bad. I'm just saying his favorite.

[Adam]

Okay, go through the list. What's cabin fever? I don't even know what that is.

[Durst]

Fever is a movie where, like, kids are in the woods at a cabin, then, like, there's. They start getting sick and going. Fever is crazy.

[Adam]

Yeah, well, I could have did that.

[Blake]

Okay, so his list is Black Hawk down, which.

[Adam]

That's number one.

[Blake]

That's crazy. That. That's number. But this is of the 21st century.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

Okay, so this is just in the last 25 years.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Blake]

I do agree.

[Durst]

I remember seeing that movie. I didn't love that movie. But he's saying number one. I was listening to this the other night. I was like, I gotta watch this.

[Adam]

I gotta watch it, bro.

[Blake]

He's just saying I gotta watch it.

[Adam]

To me, he's just saying, so.

[Blake]

There Will Be Blood was number five, and I hadn't seen There Will Be Blood, so I gotta watch it.

[Durst]

And you watched it, by the way, we never got, like, your take.

[Blake]

It's very good.

[Adam]

Yeah, I love it.

[Blake]

It's very, very good. Good.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

That movie rocks. Yeah, it's. It's just a really well done, great. Kind of boring. But I like boring movies and boring things. I like boring. Right up my alley.

[Adam]

Give me some boring.

[Blake]

So Blackhawk down. Pretty crazy. Number one. I disagree. That seems like a number 12 also.

[Durst]

You got to remember the directors. You got to remember the directors.

[Blake]

He's Ridley Scott.

[Durst]

He's going for directors. Each of these movies, you go, oh, okay.

[Blake]

Toy Story 3 is his number two. Amazing people.

[Durst]

Love right there with him. I was talking about that movie two weeks ago.

[Blake]

We're letting Bo watch, like, an hour of TV at nighttime because he starts to lose his mind right before bed. And then you're like, hey, watch this. And he loves it. So we've been watching, like, 40 minutes of whatever animated movie Rambo and. Of Rambo, of robocop, of Just Some Things to put him to bed. Yeah, just some things to put him to bed.

[Durst]

Human Centipede.

[Blake]

So we watched Toy Story 1. We're halfway through Toy Story 2 now.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

Toy Story 2 is just okay. But I'm excited to get to Toy Story 3.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

Okay. Then we got Lost in Translation. Number three.

[Durst]

Good movie.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Blake]

Also haven't seen that one. Do I watch that one?

[Durst]

No, that's a good movie.

[Adam]

I. I wonder if you'll like that.

[Durst]

It's a hang.

[Adam]

Yeah, it's a hang.

[Durst]

It's a hangout movie. If you like boring movies, you'll like it.

[Blake]

I do like boring things usually.

[Adam]

This one's really boring, though. That one's really boring.

[Blake]

I might not love it. I don't know. Dunkirk rules.

[Durst]

Awesome.

[Blake]

Dunkirk rules.

[Durst]

And again, these are directors movies.

[Blake]

And Blake, you hated Dunkirk.

[Adam]

I thought I was gonna like it a lot more. I will say.

[Blake]

Okay.

[Adam]

I remember being like, huh? It's like fractured.

[Blake]

There Will Be blood, which is. I do love pretty great Zodiac, which is very great.

[Durst]

That's right up your alley as far as boring movies. Yeah.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Durst]

In a. In a good way.

[Blake]

In a good way.

[Durst]

Good way. In that it's just like you're just in a world. You're watching it happen. There's no, like, crazy movie plot drive, by the way.

[Blake]

Unstoppable at number seven.

[Adam]

What's that?

[Durst]

I can't wall movie. But I like that movie. I saw that in the theaters for sure.

[Adam]

Wait, what is that? Is. Is that Mark Wahlberg?

[Durst]

Chris Pine.

[Adam]

Oh, love me some pine.

This episode is sponsored by Better help. Hey, TII nation. We know the holidays are a time of traditions. Some people have many in their family and some have none and are just beginning their own. Now's the time to reflect on what they mean to you or to rewrite those traditions and make your own. Like perfecting a hot chocolate recipe with the kids or continuing your great aunt's sweet potato pie. Yum. On top of that, incorporating therapy into your new or existing traditions can help ensure you take time for yourself during what can be a very joyful but sometimes hectic and lonely time of year. A tradition that allows you to focus on yourself is important. Let BetterHelp online therapy help you close the year with clarity rather than chaos. BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals. A short questionnaire helps you identify your needs and preferences. And their 12 plus years of experience and industry leading match fulfillment rate means they typically get it right the first time. If you aren't happy with the match, switch to a different therapist at any time. From their tailored wrecks this December, start a new tradition by taking care of you. Our listeners get 10% [e-mail] thisis that's better. H E L p.com thisis hey everyone.

[Durst]

So let me ask, how's your holiday shopping going? I know it can be hard to find the perfect gift for someone. I mean, when you know someone really well, it's a lot easier. But when you don't, it's a lot harder. Right, Adam?

[Blake]

Yep.

[Durst]

But I've got a Tip to help you out there.

[Blake]

What's that?

[Durst]

Get to know them better.

[Blake]

Oh, yeah, that's it. And the best way to do that is on Facebook. You can learn more about them. You can discover their interests and hobbies through Facebook groups. Right, Ders? Yep. Maybe they love dogs. Maybe they love crochet. Everybody's different, right, Ders? Yep. But you'll never know how unless you get to know them.

[Durst]

And not only can you use Facebook to get to know someone better, you can use Facebook Marketplace to find the perfect gift once you do. Right, Adam?

[Blake]

Correct.

[Durst]

And by the perfect gift, I mean a thoughtful gift. One that shows you know the person even when you maybe didn't know them that well before.

[Blake]

That's how you connect with people. That's how Facebook helps you connect with people. And a little connection goes a long way. Let's reconnect this holiday season with Facebook.

[Adam]

So I've got a question for all my gamers out there. Are you seriously going to miss out on Alienware's biggest gaming sale of the year? I mean, these are Cyber Monday prices, so it's not just another sale. No, this is some pretty big bang for your buck. You know, it's Alienware with some of the most advanced engineering out there with systems at the top of reviewers list. And what about a gift for yourself? Yeah, gift yourself a new Alienware 16 Area 51 gaming laptop. You deserve it. Okay, do it. This thing's got performance at the absolute next level with Intel Core ultra processors. And even better, you can get it during Cyber Monday. Plus you can save on all kinds of displays and accessories like, I don't know, the Alienware 32 4K QD OLED gaming monitor for ultimate visual fidelity. These really are incredible deals on PCs with otherworldly performance. So visit alienware.com deals soon and grab what you can before the lowest prices of the year go dark.

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[Blake]

I remember TJ Miller. TJ Miller. When I was doing standup and in the standup world a lot and also trying to get into acting. This movie came out in 2010, so it was right before.

[Durst]

So you were more in the stand up world than the acting world world at this point?

[Blake]

Yes, yes, absolutely. Yes, sir. And so I, I. And T.J. was the guy who was booking, was the standup who was also booking movies.

[Durst]

And I remember being like getting into the movie world. Yeah, Yeah.

[Blake]

I remember him getting unstoppable and being so jealous.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

Like not. I didn't hate the guy. I was like, tj, But I was.

[Durst]

I was like, natural standup vibe.

[Blake]

I was like, oh, dude, how can I get in these movies? This, right. This big goof is getting in these movies. How do I.

[Durst]

He's super funny.

[Blake]

He is very funny.

[Adam]

He's a very funny guy.

[Blake]

And he's a character too.

[Durst]

Yeah, he's insane.

[Blake]

He says lunatic. Love him.

[Adam]

He's.

[Durst]

How do we describe it? Like an insane character.

[Adam]

Yeah, he's an insane person.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

And then Mad Max, Fury Road.

[Durst]

So wait, did you ever see Unstoppable?

[Blake]

No, I never. I never saw it.

[Durst]

Stenzo Washington. It's Chris Pine. I believe Rosario Dawson's in it as well.

[Blake]

Like back at the headquarters, TJ Miller and tj. And it was Tony Scott.

[Durst]

Exactly. So again, it's. He's going with like directors and Tony Scott directed his first movie ever. Or maybe it's not his first movie, but like true romance. Right. So like.

[Blake]

Right, right.

[Durst]

He's putting his homies on here. Which. What are you gonna do?

[Blake]

So Mad Max Fury Road banger might be number one. Shaun of the Dead again. Banger.

[Adam]

Cute.

[Blake]

Midnight in Paris. I liked it just fine. I don't know that one I'd like to just find.

[Adam]

Is that a. Is that a sex movie?

[Blake]

No. Hot. Hot, hot, hot.

[Durst]

Then you know that's.

[Blake]

That's your boy, Owen Wilson.

[Durst]

That Allen? It's good.

[Adam]

Woody Allen.

[Durst]

It's a feel good movie. You watch it? It's Woody Allen again. We're going with big directors here.

[Blake]

And then battle royale 2000. Kenji. Fukush.

[Adam]

Yeah, he ripped that off. You got it. He ripped that off.

[Blake]

Fukushu. Fukushaku.

[Durst]

Yeah, we're saying it's based. It's basically Hunger Games. Before Hunger Games.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

And like, right before hunger games, apparently. 2000.

[Durst]

And they're both books.

[Adam]

It's like very. It's very Kill Bill too. Right? Isn't that the girl with the spike ball?

[Blake]

Wasn't that also what Running man was?

[Durst]

Ye. Yeah, but this is like teenagers, right?

[Blake]

On an island and then big bad wolves. Never heard of it. Big bad wolves, 2013.

[Adam]

Don't know it.

[Blake]

Some foreign director. Can't pronounce their names.

[Durst]

Is that the Israeli one?

[Blake]

No way to tell.

[Durst]

Okay. Because there's one that was like the movie Prisoner no.

[Blake]

13 is Jackass.

[Durst]

Jackass. Jackass 2 is better.

[Adam]

Wait, he has Jackass on. Okay, I'm back in Queen. I just got me.

[Blake]

Then School of Rock.

[Durst]

I mean, we got to remember fucking rule. Remember Jackass. Have you guys laughed harder? I mean, I will. I got a couple others.

[Adam]

But no, I think Jackass 2 is the funniest movie I've ever seen.

[Durst]

Hardest. I will say Borat is also up there as far as laughing in a movie theater. Uncontrollably.

[Adam]

McGruber. Also up there.

[Durst]

Yeah, yeah.

[Blake]

School of Rock. The Passion of the Christ. The Devil's Rejects.

[Durst]

Dude, I saw Devil's Rejects in the theater.

[Adam]

The Rob Zombie movie.

[Blake]

Yeah. Which I don't think I ever saw. And also Passion of the Christ.

[Adam]

That movie's cool.

[Durst]

I mean, Mel is good, but I'll put Apocalypto. Apocalypto over Passion for sure.

[Blake]

Chocolate.

[Durst]

It's not chocolate.

[Adam]

Oh, I was about to say that thing flopped. I worked at Brendan theaters when that came out.

[Durst]

Yeah. Different movie.

[Blake]

So it's just chocolate?

[Durst]

Yeah, but it's. I believe it's Korean.

[Blake]

Is it good?

[Durst]

I've never seen it.

[Blake]

Huh.

[Durst]

I think it's a fighting then.

[Blake]

Then Moneyball.

[Adam]

Okay. Which let's go. Oakland ball.

[Blake]

Moneyball. Fine. I. I rewatched this summer. Usually in the beginning of summer, I get a little baseball fever.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

But I also don't love just watching baseball at home.

[Adam]

Right.

[Blake]

You hate the sport and.

[Adam]

But you do get the.

[Blake]

No. Unless it's, like, a team that I'm rooting for. I'm like, I don't really care.

[Adam]

Right. I. I figured that one, I put.

[Blake]

On a random baseball game.

[Durst]

Yes.

[Adam]

That one's close to me because that's my home team. But, yeah, it had good. It had some good performances.

[Blake]

So at the beginning of the summer, usually I'll just go through and watch a few baseball movies.

[Adam]

And I fired that one.

[Blake]

Beginning of this summer, dude, when's the.

[Durst]

Last time you watched the Natural this summer?

[Adam]

I have big Naturals. I watch those.

[Durst]

Love it. I love.

I love the Natural.

[Adam]

Yes. Is that Robert Redford?

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Adam]

Oh, Rip.

[Blake]

It is weird. It is. It starts off strange.

[Durst]

It's a weird supernatural movie. Even the guy who's like, let me see how much money you have in your pocket.

[Adam]

I've never seen it. It. I gotta watch it.

[Durst]

You gotta watch it. It's a strange, like, mythological type movie. But.

[Blake]

Begin. Beginning of the summer.

[Durst]

Love it.

[Blake]

And then I rolled that right into Field of Dreams. And Field of Dreams is a lot weirder than I remembered it being, too.

[Durst]

I'm like, those are the two weird ones.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

And it's weird that Field of Dreams was so popular because it's about these ghosts. Yeah. And then no one could see them except for him. Well. And then his family.

[Durst]

Listen, this is. Here's my breakdown of why Field of Dreams is huge. It's a wet dream for men everywhere.

[Adam]

Man.

[Host/Announcer]

I just want to party.

[Blake]

But why did I love it so much as a little boy? When I watched it again, I'm like, why did I even like this Kevin costume?

[Durst]

Because it's well made. Dude. Let me just break this down real quick, okay. It's about a guy who becomes obsessed with something, which is like. Like a lot of guys later in their age, they get their hobby or whatever it is. The wife is like, we might lose the farm, but sure, go for it. And he's like, cool. And then he gets to play catch with his dead dad.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Adam]

It's just.

[Durst]

It's just every guy's fantasy to have.

[Adam]

A wife who's, like, sold in the ring.

[Durst]

Go crazy with your new thing.

[Blake]

Go crazy. Yeah. We can lose the farm, but, yeah. Hey, we. We believe you and we trust you. Yeah.

[Durst]

And by the way, your dad.

[Blake]

Hey, wouldn't that be nice?

[Adam]

He's back.

[Durst]

Have. Have a catch. But so I. I watched it with my kids, and it's a slow movie.

[Adam]

It's a slow.

[Durst]

They leaned in.

[Blake]

Oh, yeah.

[Durst]

And like, my oldest kid, this is like two years ago now. As soon as they go, if you build it, he will come. He leans over, he goes, are they talking about his dad?

[Blake]

Just, just.

[Durst]

Just keep watching.

[Blake]

Just keep watching.

[Durst]

Just keep watching. He's like, it's the dad, though, right?

[Adam]

And I go, I thought you were about to say he made a cum joke. And I would have been. I would have shed a tear of joy.

[Blake]

That would have been. And yeah, we're not quite there yet.

[Durst]

There.

[Adam]

Yeah, just not quite yet. Once they start, they don't stop you.

[Blake]

You want to know a absolute insane thing? I was watching Weapons.

[Adam]

Oh, yeah. Great movie.

[Blake]

My parents.

[Durst]

Another male fantasy. Go ahead.

[Blake]

The other day, the witch in Weapons, the redheaded witch.

Is the mom from Field of Dreams.

[Durst]

Whoa. And the girlfriend from Uncle Buck.

[Blake]

And my mom hated the movie the whole time. She's like, well, it's not a very good movie, but we're laughing at it. And I'm like, I think it's a really good movie, Mom. And she's like, I don't think anyone likes this movie. I'm like, I think it has like a 93 cinema score or whatever, sir. I don't like. I'm like, I think it's pretty universally liked. And she's like, I don't think so.

[Adam]

None of my friends are like, you knowing it?

[Blake]

And I'm like, okay. But the whole time she's like, and.

[Adam]

Paul Dano's a hack.

[Blake]

The whole time she's going to. I know her from somewhere. Like the. And every time it'd be like a jump scare. And you see the witch, it's like my mom is going, I know her from somewhere.

[Adam]

Where do I know her from?

[Blake]

And I'm like, just watch the movie. Just watch her movie.

[Adam]

I know her. What is special way to view that movie, man, with the penny commentary.

[Durst]

Just the whole time.

[Blake]

The whole time, incessantly, like, I know her.

[Adam]

It's Adam.

[Blake]

What is she from? I'm like. And she's. And then I'm like, you want me to look it up? And she goes, no, we'll figure it out. Don't look it up. We know it.

[Durst]

And then don't watch the movie. Spend the entire time thinking about that.

[Blake]

And then an hour and a half into it, she goes, field of Dreams.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

And I'm like, oh, okay.

[Durst]

I'm glad you let her have that.

[Blake]

Yeah.

[Adam]

Was there a box of wine on the table or something?

[Durst]

No.

[Blake]

No.

[Durst]

In fact, slapping the bag.

[Blake]

Yeah. Well, she's smacking. Shoot. Was she based in.

[Adam]

I'm gonna go slap the bag.

[Blake]

And then after Moneyball goes Cabin Fever.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Blake]

And then west side Story, and I. West side Story.

[Durst]

West side Story is a banger. I think it was my favorite movie that year.

[Adam]

Well, it's a great.

[Durst]

You have to see it, dude. I. I watched it by myself on, like, a screener.

[Adam]

Oh, weird.

[Durst]

And then, like, everyone got home, and I was like.

[Blake]

And your pants were around your ankles.

[Durst]

Watching west side Story.

[Blake]

The backpack was in front of the door.

[Adam]

We used to get out of town. Pass. I know. You gave us seven so that you could have four hours.

[Blake]

I gave you the pass.

[Durst]

I thought I had time to watch a movie.

[Blake]

And.

[Durst]

And what? And. And you're back already.

[Blake]

You're back.

[Durst]

Your boobs are huge. No, that is. I wish I saw that in the theater because, like, the way it's directed, it's awesome.

[Adam]

But that's an incredible musical.

[Blake]

All time.

[Durst]

Yeah, but, like.

[Blake]

And you love your musicals.

[Adam]

I do.

[Blake]

I do. What's your favorite musical? Blake?

[Adam]

What's my favorite musical? Go.

Dude, That's a great question.

[Blake]

As a. As a theater major, I mean, I'll just say Annie.

[Adam]

And you Love Annie.

[Durst]

Love Annie. Love Annie.

[Blake]

Yep.

[Adam]

I mean, I. Book of Mormon was really good.

[Blake]

You know, I think you guys could guess. I think you guys could guess mine pretty easily.

[Durst]

Is that a musical, though, or is that a. What do they call it? A review where they just cover songs?

[Adam]

No, Book of Mormon had original. Original.

[Durst]

No, no, I'm talking about if you. Adam, if you're talking about Pitch Perfect.

[Adam]

No, I got it.

[Blake]

No, no, no, no. I would not.

[Adam]

Damn Yankees. No, dude.

[Blake]

Damn Yankees. Get out of here.

[Adam]

Rent.

[Blake]

No, no, no.

[Durst]

Are we talking movies or are we talking plays?

[Adam]

We're talking plays. Musical. Oh, you're saying newsies. Of course. Yeah. No, that doesn't count. We're talking. We're talking stage shows.

[Blake]

It has to be a stage show at this point. What?

[Adam]

I have mine.

[Blake]

We're talk.

[Durst]

We're talking about movies, and then suddenly you're talking about stage plays.

[Adam]

I'm on the stage. Okay, okay. I know mine. I've got it. I've got it.

[Blake]

Okay, just say it. Just say it.

[Adam]

And it is. It's the pinnacle. It's the pinnacle of musical theater.

[Durst]

Phantom of the Opera.

[Adam]

Phantom of the opera.

[Durst]

Is it?

[Adam]

Yes, it is. Of course.

[Blake]

Is that real?

[Adam]

Of course.

[Durst]

I saw that in Chicago when it came through, and I was like, I thought it was amazing because it's like a Broadway style style play with all the crazy stuff. But the music, when you listen to it now, it's like half techno, half like opera.

[Adam]

Yeah, it's kind of fire, dude.

[Durst]

It's kind of Hans Zimmer.

[Blake]

Yes. But wouldn't you rather have some newsboys standing up today against the man and little Christian Bale going, pair of new shoes with satin laces?

[Adam]

Are they.

[Durst]

Is that Nazi Germany Newsies?

[Adam]

No, no, that's Swing Kids.

[Durst]

Swing.

[Adam]

Swing Kids.

[Blake]

It's New York. It's. I believe, the king in New York.

[Adam]

Right when Twister came out, and it is a hot number.

[Blake]

They're. They're just standing up against the. The. The owner of the newspaper, and they're gonna start. They're gonna unionize, and they. They go around to Brooklyn and Queens.

[Durst]

They're playing stickball a lot.

[Adam]

They say parano shoes and wooden dildos.

[Blake]

Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, they are. I give it points myself.

[Adam]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Durst]

Swing Kids and Newsies are the same movie to me. They came out around the same time.

[Blake]

I feel like I don't think I've.

[Adam]

Ever seen Swing Kids. They very much.

[Blake]

I think I've seen it. I think I'm so brand loyal to newsies that I. I couldn't possibly randomly. I couldn't possibly.

[Adam]

You're such a newsy bro.

[Blake]

Dude, that. That. I love just that movie.

[Adam]

I know you did.

[Blake]

I still. I know.

[Adam]

So what?

[Blake]

I know so what? I said it. And the fact that you listed Damn Yankees and all these other ones. I was a little disappointed.

[Adam]

I'm sorry I got there, though. I did get there.

[Blake]

Yeah, you did.

[Durst]

When you guys hear lists like Tarantino, does any part of it make you want to sit down? Not sit down, but just think about what your top 20 of the new millennium as far as movies are.

[Blake]

That seems like too much. Like, I. I don't. I think. I think I'd get to like, number five or six and then be like, what am I doing? Sure. Sitting here just thinking about a list of movies.

[Durst]

Yeah. I could be jacking off right now. What am I doing? Jacket off.

[Blake]

I can put on the oculus science.

[Adam]

I think I'd figure out that I haven't seen.

[Durst]

That's Adam's new workout is. The workout is moving the furniture to beat off.

[Adam]

I think I quickly figure out that I haven't seen 25 movies from the last 20 years.

[Durst]

You have. You'd have trouble.

[Adam]

I'd have trouble. I. I don't. I haven't seen.

[Blake]

You don't watch any movies?

[Adam]

Those film. I have not seen half of the films you guys just mentioned.

[Durst]

But I'm not saying you need to name the best movies and be right about it. I'm saying like your list. Naming your top 20 of the last.

[Adam]

Speed Racer.

[Durst]

That's right. You love Speed Racer. You gave me Speed Racer.

[Adam]

Visually stunning. Visually stunning.

[Durst]

Yeah.

[Adam]

And John Goodman kills it. It.

[Durst]

Who does?

[Adam]

John Goodman.

[Blake]

I didn't even know John Goodman was in it.

[Durst]

Oh. You know who would have been good in speaking of Girl Next Door? Emil H. As, as the little kid, he's a little more handsome. Square jaw.

[Adam]

He would have been great. And there will be blood.

[Durst]

He's also a little unhinged. In a good way.

[Adam]

I think he's too short. Too short.

[Blake]

Emil's a great actor.

[Durst]

Short's good cuz.

[Blake]

He's a really good actor, man. Yeah.

[Durst]

Wasn't he the like runaway hiker guy?

[Adam]

Crushed it in the survival.

[Blake]

I had to turn down a movie starring opposite Emile Hirsch earlier this year.

[Adam]

What the hell? Yeah.

[Blake]

Loose butthole. Sad. It was sad. Sad day.

[Durst]

What do you mean? Had to?

[Blake]

Because conflict or no, I physically couldn't do it.

[Adam]

Right.

[Blake]

I physically.

[Durst]

Because of your back?

[Blake]

Because of my back or because you.

[Durst]

And Emil Hirsch are just twins?

[Blake]

Yeah, well, we. We were going to play best friends in the movie and usually your best friends look exactly like you. That's why we see our powers combined. Make one decent looking person.

[Adam]

We could just plug it into AI. It's all good. We'll get it made. Yeah, we'll get it made.

[Blake]

Any take backs? Any apologies? Any epic slams?

[Adam]

Gosh.

[Durst]

I. I want to apologize to Matthew Lillard on behalf of Tarantino. Like, what are we talking about?

[Blake]

And by the way, that's rough.

[Durst]

I think we can all agree that there's like good actors and then there's like memorable actors and then there's movie stars.

[Blake]

Yep.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Durst]

I don't know if Matthew Lillard is like a good actor, like a Philip Seymour Hoffman, but he's definitely memorable. There's no one else like Matthew Lillard. I don't know if he's a movie star.

[Adam]

Matthew Lillard, but there's definitely a place.

[Blake]

He was for a minute.

[Durst]

But what do you star in? I mean, look. Slc Punk.

[Blake]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Durst]

Scream. The Scooby. The Scooby movies.

[Blake]

He was in some cool movies in the early 2000s, he had his run, which a lot of actors do. You look at an actor's career and you're like, oh, they had like a 8 to 10 year run where they were in a ton of stuff, and then it kind of fizzled out. And that's kind of where we are at in our careers. Right.

[Durst]

I'm pretty sure he became like a. Like, not a banker, but like a trader. Like, he just started trading, like, following the stocks, did perfectly well for a long time, and then came back to acting after his kids got out of school or something like that.

[Blake]

Whatever you want him go, I love him. I like that.

[Durst]

I love that he could do.

[Blake]

That's not something I would want to do at all. Like, I know people are like, yeah. And then I got into trading. I'm like, there's people that studied the stock market for decades, and that's all they think about is the stock market. Yeah, let them do that.

[Adam]

Let them cook.

[Blake]

Let them do that with your money.

[Durst]

Here's what I'll say. I think people have other skills besides acting, and that might have been his.

[Blake]

What would you guys do?

[Adam]

Woodwork.

[Blake]

Woodwork?

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Durst]

Interesting.

[Blake]

And have you ever worked with wood ever?

[Adam]

No, but I just can sense that I'd be very good at it.

[Blake]

Yeah, I don't.

I don't see that for you, even a little bit.

[Durst]

Yeah, yeah.

[Blake]

I've never seen you, like, craft anything, really.

[Durst]

Or he comes back to the podcast with, like, no fingers. He's like, yeah, by the way, I.

[Blake]

Think you'd be so bad at that.

[Durst]

Definitely. Our middle school shop class teacher had two fingers going.

[Blake]

Yes. My shop teacher also was missing part of a finger.

[Durst]

I mean, if you're in the shop that often.

[Adam]

Mr. Treddy didn't have an eye.

[Durst]

Should we get flowers to all the shop teachers?

[Blake]

I think you want to dress like that and. And look like you could woodwork, but you can't.

[Adam]

I have an uncle who does it. It came very natural to him. So I think, you know, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

[Blake]

My uncle did heroin and died on the toilet.

[Durst]

You would be.

[Adam]

You would be great at heroin, I guarantee it.

[Blake]

I don't think I'd be that good at heroin.

[Adam]

I think you'd be great. It's not hard to be bad.

[Durst]

He's too much of a butterball braggadocio.

[Adam]

Can you be good at heroin?

[Blake]

I think so. And I don't think I could be good at it. If anything, I would be like a meth head if I was Gonna do a drug.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Blake]

Yeah. Or cokehead, I guess.

[Adam]

But. Yeah.

[Durst]

Yeah, but.

[Blake]

So you're gonna say woodwork because you don't have a real answer, Durst.

[Durst]

I mean, I guess I would just coach swimming.

[Blake]

Right? Yeah. See, I still love the sport.

[Durst]

I think it's fun. Boys and speedos. Something about it. I don't know what it is.

[Blake]

Water trash. You know what I would do? Do? I would fire Isaac.

[Adam]

Yeah, of course.

[Blake]

And then take over Avalon and then actually fire Isaac.

[Durst]

Oh, wow.

[Blake]

And then be a manager. Yeah. And then be a manager.

[Adam]

Okay, I like that. Good answer.

[Blake]

And if I. And if it wasn't that if I wasn't firing Isaac multiple different ways. Right. It would be. I would open my own breakfast spot.

[Adam]

That's cool.

[Blake]

Would just be just to cook some eggs and going around table to table.

[Adam]

Being like, how you doing?

[Blake]

How's everything here?

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Blake]

Enjoying yourself?

[Adam]

So I like that answer, Adam. That's better than woodworking.

[Durst]

I. I do love the idea of his spot being like. Every half hour on the half hour, Adam sings something.

[Blake]

I. I got.

[Durst]

Everyone comes out of the kitchen. Like, it's 8:30am and you're at this restaurant and we're singing the song.

[Blake]

It's either a breakfast spot or a steak restaurant. And I could do either.

[Adam]

I'm liking these answers.

[Durst]

No, no, no. You got too much energy for the steak restaurant. I'm sorry, but the guys who walk around the steak restaurant. Very reserved. How's your meal? Very good.

[Blake]

No, no, no, no.

[Durst]

They fold. When they fold your napkin, it's a.

[Blake]

It's. It's dinner and a show.

[Adam]

God.

[Blake]

And someone comes out and they play the piano, and I sit on a stool and I prune.

[Durst]

Them.

[Adam]

Would you like some more? Would you like some more coffee?

[Durst]

And that's another episode of Please entertain. The music is important.

[Adam]

Why don't people understand my intention.

[Durst]

My intentions? Why don't people understand my intentions?

This is Blake putting together his girl 7 boobs. Grab some lube and watch some porn.

[Blake]

Weird science.

[Adam]

Dude wipes, cleans what toilet paper leaves behind in your behind. No more nasty butt crumbs or dingleberries. Our butts stay super clean and shiny here at TII thanks to Dude Wipes.

[Durst]

You wouldn't clean your muddy car with dry paper towels. So why would you clean your butt with dry toilet paper? There's a reason your mom used to spit wash your face wetter. Just cleans better, so. So ditch the itch and switch to wet xl Dude Wipes.

[Blake]

You know what they say about big hands. They need a big wipe for their bud. Dude wipes are extra large so your hands stay as confidently clean as your bud. That's a promise. We'll shake on. Dude Wipes Best Clean Pants down. Available at Amazon and major retailers nationwide.

[Adam]

Then the space hamster flew his hot air balloon all the way to the.

[Host/Announcer]

Bottom of the of the ocean. Where did that story come from? Book Dream?

[Durst]

Nope.

[Host/Announcer]

It came from a conversation. Meet Miko Mini plus, the AI companion that co creates personalized story adventures with your child in real time. What color was the hamster's cape and what did he pack for lunch? Unlock your child's imagination. Discover Miko Mini plus and the Magic of AI exclusively at Costco. 10 athletes will face the toughest job interview in fitness that will push past physical and mental breaking points.

You are the fittest of the fit. Only one of you will leave here with an IFIT contract worth $250,000.

[Durst]

This is where mindset comes in.

[Host/Announcer]

Someone will be eliminated.

[Adam]

Pressure is coming down.

[Host/Announcer]

This is Trainer Games.

[Adam]

Watch it on prime video starting January 8th.

[Host/Announcer]

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