Ep 276 : Jelking For Idiots

Summary

Podcast Summary: This Is Important – Ep 276: Jelking For Idiots

Podcast: This Is Important
Hosts: Adam DeVine, Anders Holm (Ders), Blake Anderson, Kyle Newacheck
Episode: 276: Jelking For Idiots
Date: December 23, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode of "This Is Important" is a classic, freewheeling exploration of “seriously important” topics, blending absurd humor and surprising earnestness. The gang dives into subjects like sleep deprivation, energy drinks, male grooming, male pattern baldness, the pros and cons of hair plugs, self-acceptance, bizarre gym routines, penis enlargement myths, and the shifting mentality of younger workers around mental health and work-life balance. As always, the crew’s irreverent banter is laced with personal anecdotes, playful roasts, and the occasional (uncomfortable) overshare.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Sleep Deprivation and Life on Set

• Blake shares he's running on zero sleep due to filming and jokes about living in a "hostel" in Winnipeg.
  • [05:08] Blake Anderson: “Hey, I’m on death row. Don’t you see my film quality?”

Energy Drinks: Evolution, Brands, and the Gym

• The group debates the difference between energy drinks and pre-workouts.
• Ders admits his return to energy drinks after a hiatus, celebrating the proliferation of delicious flavors.
  • [07:41] Blake Anderson: “Welcome back.”
  • [08:04] Adam DeVine: “Yeah, the taurine was heavy, yes.”
• Ders describes the appeal of brands like C4 and Ghost, mentioning collaborations with candy like Sour Patch Kids.
• The hosts riff on the idea of a "gas station workout," using ice bags and gas nozzles as gym gear.
  • [14:13] Blake Anderson: “With slingships?”
  • [14:31] Ders: “You farmer carry bags of ice until all of the ice melts.”

Fitness Talk: Jargon and Fads

• Playful confusion over fitness buzzwords such as “hypertrophy,” “lipids,” “eccentric,” and “macros.”
  • [15:09] Adam DeVine: “Buckhole. It's like lifting with chains.”
  • [15:47] Blake Anderson: “I like pH. A T. Yeah, sorry, we’re from the 90s.”

TV Binging: Lioness and Male Body Goals

• Ders recommends the series Lioness and discusses writer Taylor Sheridan’s dramatic transformation (“all the tea,” referring to testosterone).
• Discussion of shirtless action montages and the aesthetics of aging muscular men.
  • [17:27] Ders: “And now he’s on so much tea…he is so red looking.”
  • [18:37] Adam DeVine: “The fuck me muscles.”

When Is It Okay to Juice Up?

• The group agrees only men over 50 (and fully gray) should be allowed to get unnaturally jacked.
  • [19:02] Ders: “At what age do we start?...I feel like right now I’m too young.”

Going Gray & Hair Loss

• The hosts trade thoughts on celebrities who have embraced gray or white hair—Ted Danson, Eugene Levy, Johnny Knoxville, George Clooney.
• Playful rivalry over who will go gray first and best.
  • [20:45] Adam DeVine: “What about Clooney?”
• Existential panic about balding, with Ders recalling his college hair scare.
  • [59:28] Ders: “I was taking a shower, and there would be, like, hundreds of [hairs] in my hands.”

Hair Transplants, Rogaine, and Societal Stigma

• Open conversation about modern hair loss remedies, including plugs and Rogaine.
• Ders presses Blake on whether he’d get hair restoration if he began balding rapidly.
  • [38:49] Blake Anderson: “I think at that point, I would shave my head. Yeah. I would bust.”
  • [39:01] Adam DeVine: “You would pay ten grand?”
• The group discusses how normalized and advanced hair restoration has become, name-checking comedians like Santino and Theo Von.
  • [43:21] Adam DeVine: “Theo. What, the hair plugs?”
  • [43:31] Ders: “Joel McHale has done it, like, five times…”

Masculinity, Insecurity, and Appearance

• The crew veers into how much appearance affects comedy careers and self-confidence.
• Blake jokes about “embracing the skullet” or getting a scalp tattoo.
  • [40:18] Blake Anderson: “Yeah, you just do like Bam Bam Bigelow. That would be kind of fire.”

Shaved Armpits & Male Grooming

• Ders and Adam express dislike for armpit-shaving in men, unless you’re an Olympian.
  • [35:46] Adam DeVine: “A guy with a shaved armpit.”
  • [35:48] Ders: “Yeah, a guy with shaved armpit. I don’t like it.”

Penis Enlargement: The "Jelking" Segment

• The hosts stumble through discussion of “jelking,” riffing on its supposed history and effectiveness.
  • [46:14] Adam DeVine: “I heard there’s actually a term for when you try to, like, stretch your penis…think it’s called guelking.”
  • [47:34] Adam DeVine: “You know what? I feel like if joking [jelking] worked, a lot of people—yeah, we would all be joking.”
• It turns into a meta joke about the podcast becoming a “men’s health” show.

Generational Work Ethic & Mental Health Days

• Extended, serious comic rant on Gen Z's approach to office jobs and mental health days, contrasting it with their own upbringings.
• Discussion of shifting work culture, whether “mental health days” actually work, and their memories of their first jobs.
  • [67:40] Ders: “How many mental health days can you take?...I don’t work in an office.”
  • [68:28] Adam DeVine: “I think a mental health day is a sick Day. I think they’re the same thing.”

Notable Quotes & Moments

On Balding and Appearance

• [23:34] Blake Anderson: “God, can you believe none of us went bald? Unreal. Yet.”
• [40:41] Blake Anderson (on going bald): “I’d have to, like, tattoo my head.”

On Male Grooming

• [35:48] Ders: “Yeah, a guy with shaved armpit. I don’t like it.”
• [36:06] Adam DeVine (on swimmers): “Mark Spitz style. Do you understand how much slower he was because of that [mustache]?”

On Penis Enlargement

• [46:14] Adam DeVine: “I heard there’s actually a term for when you try to, like, stretch your penis to make it longer. I think it’s called guelking.”
• [47:34] Adam DeVine: “If joking worked, we’d all be joking.”

On Generational Differences in Work

• [63:00] Ders: “You can’t even be stern right to your employee anymore.”
• [63:38] Adam DeVine: “You know, comedy’s dead too.”
• [67:40] Adam DeVine: “If you need a month off, you know what would relieve the stress? Quit your job.”

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [04:29] – Episode proper begins; sleep deprivation and acting life
• [05:53] – Energy drinks—comeback, flavors, and fitness debates
• [14:31] – Gas station workout routine riff
• [16:23] – Diet, macros, and fitness jargon jokes
• [17:15] – Discussion of Lioness and Taylor Sheridan’s testosterone-fueled makeover
• [19:02] – Ethics of taking steroids/testosterone as you age
• [20:04] – Celebrity gray hair and embracing aging
• [38:49] – Would Blake get plugs or accept baldness? Dilemma discussion
• [43:21] – Modern hair restoration and celebrities
• [46:14] – "Jelking" and penis enlargement jokes
• [59:28] – Ders’s college-era balding anxiety and hair counting
• [62:27] – How youthful looks shaped the Workaholics sitcom
• [63:00] – Shifting work norms; Gen Z and mental health days
• [67:40] – Mental health days: how many is too many?
• [71:15] – Running joke on taking mental health days to binge shows and "jelk"
• [72:24] – Reflections on work-life balance and technology’s future impact

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Final Remarks

The episode maintains the "This Is Important" signature blend of raunchy, absurdist humor and sincere bro-philosophy. The hosts riff on insecurities and modern masculinity (balding, gym culture, penis size) with a mix of genuine vulnerability and relentless punchlines. There’s a pervasive nostalgia for the “old school” (whether office culture or 1990s snacks), alongside both trepidation and curiosity about society's evolving attitudes toward appearance, work, and self-care.

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For Reference: Noteworthy Quotes by Timestamp

• [19:02] Ders: “At what age do we start? Because I feel like right now I’m too young [for steroids].”
• [46:14] Adam DeVine: “I heard there’s actually a term…think it’s called guelking.”
• [63:00] Ders: “You can’t even be stern right to your employee anymore.”
• [67:40] Adam DeVine: “If you need a month off, you know what would relieve the stress? Quit your job.”
• [68:28] Adam DeVine: “I think a mental health day is a sick Day. I think they’re the same thing.”

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Transcript

[Blake Anderson]

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[Adam DeVine]

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[Ders]

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[Blake Anderson]

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[Adam DeVine]

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[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Adam DeVine]

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[Blake Anderson]

Oh gosh, you guys. You know we're always watching our kids back.

[Ders]

Yep, always.

[Blake Anderson]

But what about their back sides?

[Ders]

Well, only when there's poop in it, not like a weird way.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, well, that's why there's Little Dude Wipes. The flushable wipe for kids. They're free of chemical binders and alcohol, so they get to the safest possible clean. And my little butt could use the clean. Trust me, we got a lot going on these days. And you know, I'm just as stinky as my kids.

[Ders]

Kids can get stinky. And so can Blake.

[Adam DeVine]

Totally.

[Ders]

You reek, dude. But now you can eliminate that stank with little Dude Wipes Bubble bomb. The bubble gum scented flushable wet wipe for your little stinker. They're made with 99% water and 100% plant based natural fibers available exclusively at Walmart nationwide.

[Blake Anderson]

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[Adam DeVine]

That's exactly why Hill's pets nutrition exists. They understand that being a pet parent means being human. Hill's science led nutrition helps you give more love to than humanly possible.

[Ders]

Whether it's those long work days or trying to balance attention between multiple pets. Hill's pet nutrition gets it because you're only human. There's Hills science does more. Ready to let go of the guilt? Find the right [e-mail] iheart that's hillspet.com.

[Blake Anderson]

Iheart this is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something.

[Ders]

Do you know the symptoms of moderate.

[Blake Anderson]

To severe obstructive sleep apnea or OSA.

[Ders]

In adults with obesity?

[Blake Anderson]

They may be happening to you without you knowing.

[Ders]

If anyone has ever said you snored loudly or if you spend your days.

[Blake Anderson]

Fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability and concentration.

[Ders]

Issues, it may be due to osa.

[Blake Anderson]

OSA is a serious condition where your.

[Ders]

Airway partially or completely collapses during sleep.

[Blake Anderson]

Which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at don't sleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lilly, a medicine company. Welcome to this Is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we only talk about what is most obviously very crucially important. Today on this is Important.

[Adam DeVine]

Dude, you can find me in the club.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm going to be real with you, brother. I'm ready to deliver pizzas again.

[Ders]

Yeah, I'm actually just gonna go in my car and jerk off to these men taking their shirts on and off and I might gulk for a minute.

[Adam DeVine]

Let's go.

[Blake Anderson]

That shit's important.

[Ders]

That's life.

[Adam DeVine]

Oh, man. Motorboat, you guys.

[Ders]

So, Blake, you just said before we got on the podcast you said, I have had zero sleep. Is that because you've been working or you were out?

[Blake Anderson]

Hey, I'm on death row. Don't you see? Don't you see my film quality?

[Adam DeVine]

The record label?

[Blake Anderson]

No, the death row. I'm the real deal. I've been in prison. I'm coming to you live.

[Adam DeVine]

You do kind of look.

[Ders]

Yeah, that's Winnipeg. Looks actually pretty scary. They're putting you up in a real or. What's going on?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, it's a hostile. Yeah, hostile. The rest of the cast, it's pretty cool.

[Ders]

The rest of the cast is in like a beautiful, really nice Hotel? Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Isaac signed me up to be in a hostel. He's like, dude, it's punk rock. You're gonna love it, dude.

[Adam DeVine]

Right, right, right.

[Ders]

Were you working last night? Is that why you say you're sleepy?

[Blake Anderson]

Yes, sir. Yes. It's because. What's today, right? Today's Friday. Yeah, I actually have the day off today, so I'm pretty hyped on that.

[Adam DeVine]

Freaking actors.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, I'm a.

[Adam DeVine]

Actors just don't even know what day it is, dude.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm in a time vortex. Like, I have lost complete track of days, times. I'm just in a snowball over here.

[Adam DeVine]

Mm. That's my favorite moment of those movies where they're like. They're like, not where. When am I?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, baby.

[Adam DeVine]

When they've time traveled and then someone like, gives them a newspaper and they go fudgeing crazy looking for the date on it.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

I live for that shit.

[Ders]

I've been in one of those movies.

[Adam DeVine]

What'd you do?

[Ders]

Yeah, when we first met and what.

[Adam DeVine]

Can you just. Just take us there now?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. Give us the scene, dress it up.

[Ders]

Okay, so I go to a blueberry Red Bull.

[Adam DeVine]

Okay.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay. I just want to party.

[Ders]

And it didn't exist. And I'm like, what do you mean it doesn't exist? They're like, blue, blue. Red Bull doesn't make blueberry Red Bulls. And I'm like, whoa, whoa. They do.

[Adam DeVine]

This is because they did the same thing in Inception, I think.

[Ders]

Yeah, they used blueberry Red Bull based.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Very famous scene.

[Adam DeVine]

So it was like a nod and a wink too?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, yeah. The original draft. Instead of a spinning top Red Bull can.

[Ders]

Right.

[Blake Anderson]

Blueberry.

[Adam DeVine]

And in the Shining, when the elevator opens, that's code red, right?

[Blake Anderson]

Sir, you were here last night?

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, he's time traveled to the future and the past. When the ballroom.

[Blake Anderson]

You were here last night drinking a rock star, sir, he's just sampling every energy drink. I like that.

[Adam DeVine]

I feel like the Simpsons must have done that.

[Blake Anderson]

They did everything.

[Adam DeVine]

Come on. They really have. They really have.

[Ders]

I will say I'm. I'm back drinking energy drinks.

[Blake Anderson]

Ok.

[Ders]

I know, guys. I know.

[Blake Anderson]

Welcome back.

[Ders]

I know. Not as much, obviously, one every few days or so, but.

[Adam DeVine]

Well, they've run out. They've run out. Adam. They can't serve you.

[Ders]

I love it. Dude, they've gotten so good. They've gotten infinitely better than they used to taste.

[Adam DeVine]

Okay.

[Blake Anderson]

What? How? When they were already so good.

[Ders]

They used to taste like energy drinks. They would taste like a specific.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, the taurine was heavy, yes.

[Ders]

Yeah, like monster. Tasted like a monster. Now you could just drink lemonade, and it's energy lemonade. It's like. I think. I think C4 does it, and it's just called classic lemonade.

[Blake Anderson]

Hello.

[Adam DeVine]

Okay. Well, that's like a pre. A pre workout.

[Ders]

What's an energy drink?

[Adam DeVine]

Or does C4 just do energy?

[Ders]

Yes.

[Adam DeVine]

I thought C4 was a pre workout. Such.

[Ders]

Well, if they do energy drinks that you can use as a pre workout.

[Adam DeVine]

It was going to be a little bigger, but.

[Blake Anderson]

Where are the guns, brother?

[Ders]

What's happening?

[Blake Anderson]

Did you just walk through tsa? No, Guys.

[Ders]

Is it the shirt that. That's making you look so scrawny? What happened there?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

My God. Jesus.

[Adam DeVine]

I mean, this is a football jersey, so I guess something.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, maybe we're. Anyway, yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

C4. C4. Look at.

[Ders]

Anyway, you're looking mad weak if you're.

[Adam DeVine]

Just tuning in now. My arms are huge.

[Ders]

Jesus Christ. No, because I've seen your arms. Not like a month ago. And I. I was like, oh, yeah, Ders is looking pretty jack. I'm always, you know, gauging how jacked my bros are and how jacked they aren't.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And I was just thinking, durst looks pretty jacked, but right now he looks like, yeah, grandma look. Really?

[Adam DeVine]

More of the I'm a try guy. You know, I'm not really a bi guy.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, that's not what I hear.

[Adam DeVine]

Anyway. C4.

[Blake Anderson]

C4.

[Adam DeVine]

You're just doing it now. I look good. Adam's back on energy drinks.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ders]

But. And I've tried a handful of them now at the gym, and they're. They're all so tasty. Ghost energy. Have you had these energy drinks?

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

My God, again? I thought this is a pre workout. No.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, well, they're energy drinksters.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, Sorry. I know that pre workout has caffeine in it. Right, Right. But I think these are not energy drinks. They are pre workout drinks with caffeine. No.

[Blake Anderson]

What's the difference? Please, can you. Can you. Can you draw a line?

[Ders]

I mean, they sell my gas stations.

[Blake Anderson]

What's the difference?

[Ders]

I don't think they.

[Adam DeVine]

I could be wrong. I don't know. The difference for a pre workout would be that it has, like, some creatine and it's got, like, amino acids and all the other shit, you know? Energy drink is just straight up the blood of children.

[Ders]

So C4's thing is, life gave us lemons. We blew them up. Meet the official energy drink of summer. Oh, yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Okay.

[Ders]

Delicious energy Drink right in the title.

[Adam DeVine]

And so here's my question. Is that C4's energy drink?

[Blake Anderson]

Okay.

[Adam DeVine]

Or is that. I'm just asking. I just want to know.

[Ders]

So I don't work for the company, buddy. All I know is it says energy drink.

[Blake Anderson]

You're acting like.

[Adam DeVine]

You're damn near acting like it.

[Ders]

It says it' energy drink on the can.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay?

[Ders]

And then I drink it. I have energy, and I go to the gym. So I'm using it as a pre workout because that's where I want to drink an energy drink. But if you wanted it to start your day, I guarantee you it would be fine. And you're not going to be.

[Blake Anderson]

Jesus.

[Adam DeVine]

Adam. I'm just trying to stretch this episode, man. We got two. We got to do two today.

[Ders]

Okay, well, D. We're four minutes in.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

I feel like we're just kind of stretching already.

[Adam DeVine]

Watch. We'll see you at 54.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, well.

[Adam DeVine]

And so you're gonna go harder than ever on these things because they're just better. Can you be like, a energy drink sommelier?

[Ders]

Zinc. Zinc Sommelier. If anyone could, I feel, it's me, but I. I'm a little wary because, you know, I went off the caffeine about a year ago, and I was off for several months because what, the heart.

[Blake Anderson]

Heart. Your heart was palpitating?

[Ders]

No, it was. It was because of the inflammation. Cells. Yes. Themselves.

[Blake Anderson]

Right.

[Ders]

You got to bring the inflammation down.

[Adam DeVine]

Feed those.

[Ders]

And by the way, I will say I've never looked better. Never looked or felt better than when I was off caffeine.

[Blake Anderson]

Sure.

[Ders]

It wasn't drinking?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

I feel like I. I got lean. I got, like, leaner than I just can when I'm doing all the other stuff, and I'm like, oh, this is so much healthier. But I hated it.

[Blake Anderson]

And, yeah, it wasn't.

[Adam DeVine]

Can I be honest with you, bud?

[Ders]

What's that?

[Adam DeVine]

You. You weren't very funny.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, yeah, you're funny.

[Adam DeVine]

Every time you thought you were being funny, Blake and I would look at each other and go, oh, my God.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm gonna give each other a look.

[Ders]

He's. He's not even eating steak. This guy's not funny. He's not drunk all the time.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, no, it was sad.

[Ders]

That's not funny.

[Blake Anderson]

We need Adam to have his go Go juice, baby.

[Ders]

Yeah, well, I loved it too, so I'm back on the sauce.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay.

[Adam DeVine]

I like that C4. What was the other one you dropped?

[Blake Anderson]

Ghost.

[Ders]

Ghost. Ghost. Lot of good.

[Blake Anderson]

I like Ghost. They do. They're the ones that do the good, like collabs. Like, they'll just say like, yo, this one. Sour Patch Kids.

[Ders]

And yeah, they have a Sour Patch Kids that I.

[Blake Anderson]

Come on. Liquid sour patch. Imagine if that was around when we were kids. Oh, my God, I would just be taking that to the freaking dome, dude.

[Adam DeVine]

Well, I.

[Ders]

It just got me excited because when you walk into my gym, it's a giant wall of energy drinks. Like, they have two giant free refrigerators.

[Adam DeVine]

That are just chock full, like airport style. Like the open wall one.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And you're just. And it's bro, say less.

[Blake Anderson]

Does it say get. Get you some?

[Ders]

I wish it did say, get you some.

[Blake Anderson]

I wish I did.

[Ders]

I wish I did.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm gonna start saying get you some.

[Adam DeVine]

Does it have those plastic flaps that hang in front of everything?

[Blake Anderson]

Get you.

[Ders]

No, it doesn't have. No, no.

[Adam DeVine]

Good, good, good.

[Ders]

Just a regular gym.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay.

[Ders]

But. But there's so many different flavors and types, and I want to. I want to try them all.

[Blake Anderson]

You sure it's not a 7 11? You're.

[Ders]

Yeah, I'm just working out in a Circle K. I'm just dead.

[Guest/Announcer]

Deadlift.

[Adam DeVine]

I think that's what we're figuring out here. He's like, you just grab.

[Blake Anderson]

It's called AM PM. It's a 24 Hour Fitness. It's called AM PM because it's open.

[Adam DeVine]

Jugs of blue liquid go in whatever.

[Ders]

Time of the day. And there's a ton of heavy stuff you can lift. There's cases of Budweiser.

[Blake Anderson]

Have you ever been in the gym? 7:11 is open seven days a week, 11 months a year.

[Adam DeVine]

I do want to see Adam doing what they call them battle ropes. With the fucking gas. The gas station.

[Blake Anderson]

With slingships?

[Adam DeVine]

No, no, with the gas station nozzles. Just doing battle ropes.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, dude, look at homies got the cats. Might have to gas hose workout. Dude, if you could formulate a gas station workout, you would go so viral, dude.

[Ders]

Oh, yeah, dude. Well, what you do is you. You farmer carry bags of ice until all of the ice melts.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And that's. That's how long you have to go.

[Blake Anderson]

It starts to get pretty easy towards the end if you get there.

[Ders]

Yeah, but then. But then you're done. Yeah, but. But you're so exhausted by the time you get there.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And then you better hope you're working out on a hot day. If it's the middle of the winter, you're fucked.

[Blake Anderson]

Absolutely.

[Ders]

Dude.

[Adam DeVine]

I do love that idea. What would that be called if you had Like a bucket with like a little hole in it where the water slowly leaking so it's heavy, but it's getting light.

[Ders]

Oh, no, people do. People do that.

[Adam DeVine]

And I'm saying, what is the name for that bucket.

[Ders]

Bucket hole workout?

[Adam DeVine]

Buckhole. It's like lifting with chains where, like, it's heavier towards the top, I guess because you're now lifting more chains.

[Blake Anderson]

Explain dirt.

[Ders]

They call it like eccentric or eccentric and decentric.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Is that what it is, you guys?

[Adam DeVine]

Hypertrophy. What else?

[Ders]

Lipids. Lipids. Don't like them. Don't like lipids.

[Adam DeVine]

Lipids. Macros. Macros. Are we back there?

[Ders]

For sure?

[Blake Anderson]

Macros. I know because you guys. What. Wait, what are these? Let's go back to what's a lipid? Is that a workout you're saying? Or that's a.

[Ders]

No, lipid is a fat.

[Blake Anderson]

That's a type of fat.

[Ders]

We don't like Lipid. No, lipid is fat.

[Blake Anderson]

It is fat.

[Ders]

Yes.

[Adam DeVine]

I like pH. A T. Yeah, sorry, we're from the 90s.

[Blake Anderson]

Hello, goodbye.

[Ders]

In the 90s.

[Adam DeVine]

Whenever I hear fat, I assume it's pH.

[Blake Anderson]

I think I've heard the word lipids.

[Ders]

Yeah, lipids.

[Blake Anderson]

But I haven't heard the other word you said. Eccentric. Eccentric Billionaire. What was that one?

[Ders]

Okay, so lipids are a diverse group of water insoluble organic molecules, including fats, oils, waxes, and steroids.

[Blake Anderson]

Give me some of those, baby. I want that.

[Ders]

Dude, I'm watching that show Lioness, by the way. It's good, dude, it's good.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay.

[Ders]

It's what that Taylor Sheridan should be doing instead of the Landman. What do we.

[Adam DeVine]

You know, I don't even know what this is.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, hold up.

[Ders]

Okay, I know. Me neither. I didn't know either. But it's Zoe Saldana. Morgan Freeman's in it. It's like a cool cast and they run like a secret sect of the CIA where they do. They like send in this like, woman to like infiltrate a group of terrorists or. Or whatever, and then kill the terrorists either by her or send. They send in a bomb.

[Blake Anderson]

That's not nice.

[Ders]

It's truly crazy stuff. But Taylor Sheridan put himself in the movie or in the show. And okay, this guy, the last time I saw him, he was just. He looked kind of like a cowboy guy. And you're like, okay, yeah, he's like a cowboy type guy. He created Yellowstone and, you know, Hell or High Water, which is one of my favorite movies.

[Blake Anderson]

And yeah, that's a good tidbit to know.

[Ders]

And a handful of other cool things.

[Adam DeVine]

He writes Sicario. Am I crazy?

[Ders]

Yes, that's right.

[Blake Anderson]

He wrote nice pull.

[Ders]

And now he's on so much tea.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, is he a big boy?

[Ders]

He has to be on the most amount of tea. He is so red looking. And yeah, like, there's a lot of, like. I think it's a show that both women and men like. Men like because the action and women like because guys are always taking their shirts off and they're always.

[Adam DeVine]

That's what women love.

[Blake Anderson]

Women love that.

[Ders]

And then. And then it's. And then it's like slow montages of men taking their shirts off, putting their shirts back on. And under the guise of, like, we're getting ready for war.

[Adam DeVine]

You had me in under the guise.

[Guest/Announcer]

Hello.

[Blake Anderson]

Hold on. Yes. Points.

[Ders]

You could just cut to them driving. You don't need to see them taking their shirts off and on and getting in and out of the shower.

[Adam DeVine]

Right.

[Ders]

So it's a lot of that.

[Blake Anderson]

It's just getting dressed.

[Ders]

Like the last episode I watched last night, it was like seven, eight minutes of them, like, getting dressed and showering.

[Adam DeVine]

You seeing my belt?

[Blake Anderson]

Getting ready for good. Like, it's a tight shirt too, so they're like pulling it down over the abs and stuff.

[Ders]

And Taylor Sheridan is so naked in this, and he is so jacked. But in a way, the Usher muscles.

[Adam DeVine]

The fuck me muscles.

[Ders]

He's too old for those. Yeah, but he has muscles on top of them. Like, he's taking so many steroids or testosterone or whatever he's on that the muscles are growing on top of muscles. And now it's just like a slab of.

[Adam DeVine]

It's like the big muscle belly.

[Ders]

Yes.

[Blake Anderson]

I love muscle belly. Muscle belly.

[Adam DeVine]

Guys, can you hold my hands? We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it.

[Ders]

I would love to. Okay, at what age do we start? Because I feel like right now I'm too young.

[Adam DeVine]

But when it's in poor taste to do it before 50, I think you.

[Blake Anderson]

Have to be gray. You have to be fully gray.

[Adam DeVine]

I feel like 50. It's like a celebration. It's like, we made it.

[Blake Anderson]

I. I think you have to be fully gray and then you can start. Start really getting jacked in and do your steroids.

[Ders]

I don't.

[Adam DeVine]

But what if you don't get gray at 50?

[Ders]

Yeah. What if you don't get gray?

[Blake Anderson]

Well, then you missed the. You missed the bus and I'm sorry.

[Ders]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[Adam DeVine]

You gotta wait.

[Blake Anderson]

You have to wait. Or you can dye your hair gray.

[Adam DeVine]

Adam does not like this at all.

[Blake Anderson]

It's coming. Give it. Give it time.

[Ders]

I have, like, three gray hairs. I'm not go. I'm not gonna go gray.

[Blake Anderson]

It happens quick. It happens quick. Just trust me. Just trust me.

[Ders]

Trust you. You. You don't have a lot of gray hair.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm telling you, it's. It's happening, man, and it's happening quick. Wait till.

[Ders]

I can't wait for you to go fully gray.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, me too. I'm gon wizard.

[Ders]

You're gonna look like such a woman that's gone.

[Adam DeVine]

Like, who's gone. Who's gone gray recently?

[Blake Anderson]

Going gray. That's our next podcast. Going gray.

[Adam DeVine]

Gray. Grandma Bowie just talked about Grey's Anatomy.

[Blake Anderson]

That would be sick.

[Adam DeVine]

Who's gone gray the best? Like, I'll just. Right off the bat, this is a throw. This is kind of a throwback. But it was like when Ted Danson showed up in Saving Private Ryan and had like. Like, white hair. Everyone was like, okay, let me. It's Ted Danson in Saving Private Ryan, right? Hang on a second. Has his hat off, hair's white, and you're like.

[Ders]

That kind of throws me off.

[Adam DeVine]

I need, like, three minutes to just get back to France.

[Ders]

I kind of don't remember him in Saving Private Ryan.

[Adam DeVine]

I. Yeah, it's a too old.

[Ders]

I feel like. I feel like that would throw me out of the movie because he's such a television. I know you could do both.

[Blake Anderson]

Both.

[Ders]

But back then you couldn't do both. But also, he's such a TV actor.

[Adam DeVine]

Right.

[Ders]

It's a little strange to see him for more than 30 minutes at a time.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay. You like your dancing in doses.

[Adam DeVine]

They did put Norm on a stool nearby. Just good in his regular costume in.

[Blake Anderson]

The middle of a war. That's cool.

[Adam DeVine]

Spielberg sends it, bro.

[Blake Anderson]

Like, hey, Norm. And then he throws a grenade. That's cool.

[Adam DeVine]

Has the dad from American Pie ever looked richer?

[Blake Anderson]

Eugene Levy.

[Guest/Announcer]

He looked.

[Adam DeVine]

He. He's gone gray fully. And he just looks like a male prostitute. He looks so fetching.

[Ders]

Oh, and that's rich to you?

[Blake Anderson]

Well, no, no.

[Adam DeVine]

Like, silky. He looks like what?

[Ders]

Like a male. Like a male prostitute is like. That's what you imagine a rich older man to look like.

[Adam DeVine]

Like, if he was, like, an old male prostitute.

[Ders]

Okay.

[Adam DeVine]

He would be working, you know? I mean, I don't know. Not like the corner. Not like a teenager on the corner with, like, jeans hanging off his ass.

[Blake Anderson]

What do people. That's fine. That's fine. What do people.

[Adam DeVine]

He's not like, not like a Not like Blake. Not like a little Blake.

[Blake Anderson]

Bay area, bro. You know how we do it in the bay?

[Ders]

Twinkie Blake.

[Adam DeVine]

But he just. He just seems like he's finally found his look and.

[Ders]

Okay, Isaac has a good one here.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay.

[Ders]

He says, what about. Good job, Isaac. The second half of the latest Jackass movie, when Johnny was totally gray. Johnny Knoxville.

[Blake Anderson]

Gracefully. Gracefully.

[Ders]

I like that because he's. That's not great. That's white. That he went. He went.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh. So now we're doing. We're saying white and gray are two different things, but.

[Ders]

No. Okay. Well, it's one of the same, but I'm just saying he went super.

[Adam DeVine]

Super shades of gray.

[Blake Anderson]

The shades of gray. Splitting hairs at that. What about Clooney? Oh, my God. What about Clooney?

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, I thought that was a subtle. Yeah, that was like a long week. We kind of. We rode that with him. I feel.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Well, Timothy Oliphant is suddenly gray.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Looks sharp.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay. I like that.

[Adam DeVine]

I think people who are, like, tan and gray. Do you think.

[Ders]

Are we gonna go gray? Do you think. Do you think the three of us are going.

[Blake Anderson]

I thought everybody does. Doesn't everybody go gray? If you don't dye your. Isn't it, like, inevitable? Like.

[Adam DeVine]

Like everybody but Howard Stern.

[Ders]

Oh, I feel like you don't. There could be levels to it. Some people go very gray. Some people like salt and pepper, if you will. Salt and pepper.

[Adam DeVine]

Some people are salt and pepper gray.

[Ders]

Go fully ball spinderella gray.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know. I haven't checked in on them in a while.

[Adam DeVine]

Right. God, can you believe none of us went bald? Unreal yet.

[Blake Anderson]

It's true.

[Ders]

It's a phenomenon.

[Adam DeVine]

How did we find each other?

[Ders]

We are in our 40s, Blake. Like my dad, every time I asked him a few times ago that he was here visiting, I'm like, when did you go bald? And he's like, I mean, that's probably about your age. And I'm like, dad, I did the math. I'm like, when I was 18 years old. When. When. When you got my.

[Adam DeVine]

You got this.

[Ders]

You got this when you were my age. I was 18 years old and you were so bald.

[Adam DeVine]

I did the. That his brain breaks. Yeah.

[Ders]

And you were so bald when I moved out here.

[Adam DeVine]

Can you imagine having an 18 year old right now, by the way?

[Ders]

I know, it's. It's absolutely crazy, but you were so bald and you were so bald when I was, like, 8. So you're bad at math and knowing, like, how old you were, but was.

[Blake Anderson]

He like, I was shaving my head, dude. That was. That wasn't really bald.

[Ders]

No, no, no, cuz. Cuz for a long time, he just had, like a.

[Blake Anderson]

A.

[Ders]

A swirl here.

[Blake Anderson]

Like Charlie Brown.

[Ders]

Yeah, like, just like a. It just. He didn't want to shave it, but it was just like a little poof of hair.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Because as soon as you shave that, you're admitting you're like, it's over.

[Blake Anderson]

That's cool, dude. That's the kind of. I like. I like when dudes cling to the very, very, very last of the essence of their hair.

[Adam DeVine]

Right.

[Blake Anderson]

Those are. I hope so, because those are cuts. You can't get in the wild or. Well, you can only get in the wild. Like. Like, it has to happen naturally. You can.

[Adam DeVine]

Adam, I'm so glad you're with me on this. We both just made the exact same.

[Blake Anderson]

Those are hairstyles that only God can bless you with. And they happen through.

[Ders]

Okay, so that's what in the wild means.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. In the wild. They only happen in the wild. Through living a wild life. The Lord's wild kingdom, it blesses you with that cut.

[Ders]

All right.

[Blake Anderson]

I say, I don't think people should be able to get hairstyles. I think it's bullshit.

[Ders]

Okay.

[Blake Anderson]

I think you should have to rock with what.

[Adam DeVine]

Okay. You are a hairstyle.

[Blake Anderson]

I am you.

[Ders]

Yeah. You're a human hairstyle.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm very aware.

[Adam DeVine]

Did you know on your call sheet for this movie, it just says Hair guy?

[Ders]

Yeah, You're.

[Adam DeVine]

You're. You're in the top call. She. But I don't know. They don't know your name. I know they say, get the hair guy here. And.

[Ders]

Where's Hair? Hair Rolling and. Oh, we're missing Hair.

[Adam DeVine]

He's right. Hair.

[Blake Anderson]

Hair the man. Hair Man.

[Ders]

No, no, no, no. Hair.

[Blake Anderson]

Where's Hair Man?

[Ders]

Hair Man. I should learn his name. But I have ice, so I won't remember.

[Blake Anderson]

You don't have to.

[Adam DeVine]

Hey, guys.

[Blake Anderson]

It's.

[Adam DeVine]

It's Blake.

[Ders]

It's not.

[Blake Anderson]

It's not.

[Adam DeVine]

It's hair.

[Blake Anderson]

Shut up, Hair.

[Adam DeVine]

Shut up, Hair. Get on your mark.

[Ders]

I don't think so. I. I don't think anyone's gonna go back because now. What is it called? Hair transfer.

[Blake Anderson]

What are they called?

[Ders]

Hair plugs are so good and so.

[Adam DeVine]

But also the. The Rogaine or whatever. I know a dude who got Rogaine.

[Blake Anderson]

Joe Rogan.

[Adam DeVine]

And he showed me pictures of before, and I didn't meet him.

[Blake Anderson]

Why would you.

[Adam DeVine]

I met him with Hair, and he showed me pictures And I was like, not really. But it was shocking how how far.

[Ders]

He clawed back to really Rogaine has gotten so good.

[Adam DeVine]

This is Important is presented by Heineken 00. You know it's funny, people turn into full on detectives the second I show up with a Heineken 00. Suddenly I'm getting all the questions like dry January, hey, are you training? Doing some big new wellness thing? And half the time I'm like, guys, relax. There's no headline. Honestly, I just like having a great tasting alcohol free option that fits wherever I am. Weekday dinners, office hangs, backyard nights, or those quick gatherings that somehow turn into hours. It works for pretty much any moment. No explanation needed. Sometimes you just want to Enjoy a nice Heineken 00 and there doesn't need to be any fuss about it. And sure, a lot of people jump into dry January after the holidays, but enjoying a Heineken 00 doesn't require a challenge or a resolution. Sometimes it's just as simple as I want something that tastes great. Zero alcohol, great taste. Now you can available at your local Heineken retailer or for [e-mail] must be 21 or older to purchase. Enjoy Heineken responsibly.

[Blake Anderson]

So I've got a question for all my gamers out there. Are you seriously going to miss out on Alienware's biggest gaming sale of the year? I mean, these are Cyber Monday prices, so it's not just another sale. No, this is some pretty big bang for your buck. You know, it's Alienware with some of the most advanced engineering out there with systems at the top of reviewers list. And what about a gift for yourself? Yeah, gift yourself a new Alienware 16 Area 51 gaming laptop. You deserve it. Okay, do it. This thing's got performance at the absolute next level with Intel Core Ultra processors. And even better, you can get it during Cyber Monday. Plus you can save on all kinds of displays and accessories like, I don't know, the Alienware 32.4K QD OLED gaming monitor for ultimate visual fidelity. These really are incredible deals on PCs with otherworldly performance. So visit alienware.com deals soon and grab what you can before the lowest prices of the year go dark. You know, I'm not gonna let big wireless and my overpriced phone bill suck the joy out of the holidays this year. Because right now all of Mint Mobile's Unlimited plans are 50% off. I can get 3, 6 or 12 months of unlimited premium wireless for 15 bucks a month. It's their Best Deal of the Year and it makes it real easy for me to give my expensive wireless bill the Scrooge treatment. That's right. Mint Mobile's best deal of the year is happening right now. Like I said, you can get a 3, 6 or 12 month unlimited plan for $15 a month. And all Mint plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text on the nation's largest 5G network. It's so easy and you can bring your current phone and number over to Mint. No contracts and no nonsense. Their services are worth your time and money because you will be saving so much of it. Turn your expensive wireless present into a huge wireless savings future by switching to Mint Shop. Mint unlimited [e-mail] important that's mintmobile.com important limited time offer upfront payment of $45 for 3 month, $90 for 6 month and $180 for 12 month plan are required. $15 a month equivalent taxes and fees. Extra initial plan terms Only greater than 35 gigabytes may slow when network is busy. Capable device required availability, speed and coverage varies. See mintmobile.com TII Nation if you could stop somebody from breaking in before they got inside, why wouldn't you? Most old school systems go off after someone's already in your place that's too late. Well, luckily Simplisafe is different. It's proactive with the double layer of defense that stops crimes before they start. First, AI powered cameras spot potential threats outside. Then live agents step in talking to a person through the camera, letting them know they're on video and police will be dispatched if they don't leave. They can even trigger a loud siren or spotlight. That's how you help stop crime before it starts. And there are no long term contracts or hidden fees you can cancel anytime. It's incredibly easy to set up and it gives me peace of mind when I leave the show. Simply Safe is so reliable and I feel better knowing I am protected dude. And with their easy to use app, you can quickly check in on your property this month. Only take 50% off any new system. This is one of the best prices you will ever see for Simplisafe. Don't miss it. Hit simplisafe.com thisis again that's simplisafe.com thisis and lock in your discount. There's no safe like Simplisafe.

[Ders]

All right legends. You know we're all about the important stuff. Like what are you wearing around the house? If your answer is a towel barely hanging on, it's Time for an upgrade. We're talking about dude robe. The robe that went viral on shark tank. Over 300, 000 guys have already made the switch.

[Adam DeVine]

Oh, yeah, it looks like a hoodie. Feels like a post shower victory. And it's made with their proprietary weekend blend fabric. So every day feels like the weekend hoodie. On the outside, towel lined on the inside, non floppy sleeves, built in belt. You can't lose. And yeah, there's a secret pocket too. They even have matching shorts and pants so you can lounge like a legend, mate, without risking the old dick slip.

[Blake Anderson]

It's the robe you'll throw on and never want to take off. Better hide it before the wife steals it. But with the holidays coming up, it's the perfect gift for all the special dudes in your life. Your brother, your dad, your best bud, or that guy still rocking gym shorts from college. Go to duderobe.com and use code thisis for 15% off. That's. This is. You deserve better. So ditch your shitty loungewear and upgrade to dude robe today. Didn't I see a story in the news that like, UCLA cured baldness, like forever? Like, it was like. It's like a true thing. It's like baldness is gone. They. They got us.

[Ders]

All right, okay. And that's a true thing. And because you read a headline, it sounds like you know the article.

[Blake Anderson]

You read a headline when I was opening my aol, maybe Todd or Isaac can. It's real. Look, Baldness cure.

[Ders]

Hello. Well, no, it's a question. They go, did UCLA just cure baldness? And if you click on it says no.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Wait. And then. Do you see this person?

[Blake Anderson]

It's me. Yeah, it's me.

[Ders]

I don't even. There's a guy. Oh, by the way, a guy who's like, he has no armpit hair. He shaves his armpit hair and then he just plays with his hair. This is getting me rock hard.

[Blake Anderson]

Hello.

[Ders]

Right.

[Adam DeVine]

Can I ask you guys something?

[Blake Anderson]

What?

[Adam DeVine]

And no one listening to this will understand this. What are they doing with this gif up top here?

[Ders]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Blake Anderson]

Gif. What? What did we click?

[Ders]

What do you mean? The link, Blake.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't want to click links. God damn it. Oh, my God. This guy's AI for sure, right? He must be.

[Adam DeVine]

What?

[Blake Anderson]

Look at the way his forehead's moving. That is an AI Human.

[Adam DeVine]

I was locked in on the eyes. I'm sorry. I didn't see the forehead.

[Ders]

I'm mostly so. So it's this link about ucla. Maybe curing baldness. And then it's a twink, like, gentleman. Yeah. Playing with his. Tousling his hair. And then I'm mostly intrigued by the shaved armpits.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

I, I. I know guys do it. I know bodybuilders do it. I know some. I hate it. I hate it.

[Adam DeVine]

A guy with a shaved armpit.

[Ders]

Yeah, a guy with shaved armpit. I don't like it.

[Adam DeVine]

You know, do your thing unless you're gearing up for finals at the Olympic trials.

[Ders]

Yeah, that's true.

[Blake Anderson]

But how cool would it be, dirt, if there's, like, a really fast, like, German team and they all had super hairy armpits hits, I would be rooting for them to win at swimming.

[Adam DeVine]

Anything, anybody fast is cool.

[Ders]

Yeah, but what if they're super fast and they're just covered in hair, dude?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. Like, hairy.

[Ders]

Would that be cool, too? Sure. But here you are shaving your butthole hair in a. In a hojo bathroom.

[Adam DeVine]

This is, like. This is, like, Mark Spitz style. He used to have, like, a huge mustache. Do you understand how much slower he was because of that? Yeah, I don't. I don't. I want people to go back to just regular speedos instead of all the suits that, like, cover their body.

[Blake Anderson]

What did the. In the, like, what are they? Jammers.

[Adam DeVine]

Jammers.

[Blake Anderson]

I love that they're called jammers, sweetheart. Where are my jammers?

[Ders]

That's. I mean, that's essentially what I. I tell my son to go put his jammers on.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, where's daddy's jam?

[Ders]

Go put your jammers.

[Adam DeVine]

We say jammies. We say jammies and jammers. It's really confusing around bedtime.

[Ders]

Wow.

[Blake Anderson]

God.

[Ders]

That's. Why wild?

[Adam DeVine]

Oh, good for you. He comes in wearing a swimsuit. I go, son, you're going to sleep.

[Blake Anderson]

Blake.

[Ders]

Real talk. And I want you to be serious. And I know you say, like, you want your hair in the wild, and yada, yada, if tomorrow it just went, your hair is falling out in clumps, and they go, well, Blake, if you can spend whatever, what an amount that you could afford, you will have your full head of hair. No one will notice. You'll have to take a few weeks off. No one will notice. And you'll have your full head of hair again. Or, hey, you're leading the witness here, Duras. I'm talking to Blake. Or you're gonna look like you're out in the wild like you said earlier, and you got a haircut that you could only find in the wild where it's really strangly on the sides, and it's like. And it's just, like, a swirl right here and get to it. Would you then decide to do that and. And not be a hair guy anymore? Or would you spend the ten grand.

[Blake Anderson]

Or whatever you're saying? Like, it's, like, falling out in, like, in chunks and clumps in, like, sectors.

[Ders]

It's. It's going fast. Like, within a month, you're going to be a bald old woman.

[Blake Anderson]

Because if it's like. If it's, like, skullet vibe, like, you know, I have the ring around, and then, like, I have, like, a cool, wispy.

[Ders]

It's not.

[Blake Anderson]

Not.

[Ders]

Hey, it's not cool. It's not cool. You immediately look like the old woman from weapons.

[Blake Anderson]

Dude. No, she's fire. Dude, that haircut is sick.

[Ders]

No, actually, she has the red hair, right.

[Adam DeVine]

She looks good.

[Blake Anderson]

She's got the bangs. I've always wanted bangs. So if I have an excuse.

[Adam DeVine]

I don't know. He's talking about when the wig is off.

[Ders]

Yes, when the wig is off.

[Adam DeVine]

When the wig is off, Blake, go straight up, like. Yeah, no, like, pippy Long stockings. They. Status.

[Ders]

Yeah. When she's wearing a wig. Sure.

[Adam DeVine]

Dude. You could find me in the club.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. And I want you to be real. I think at that point, I would. I would shave my head. Yeah. I would bust.

[Ders]

You would shave your head and not just, oh, oh, no.

[Blake Anderson]

I would take the miracle. I would take the miracle drug, and I would go.

[Adam DeVine]

You would pay ten grand? No, he's not saying, would you take it?

[Ders]

Well, it's not a miracle drug. It's. It's. It's hair plugs, essentially.

[Adam DeVine]

But then, yeah, you got to go to Turkey, right? It's Turkey.

[Ders]

No, I'm. Well, no, you could do it here in the States.

[Adam DeVine]

Don't people go to Turkey?

[Blake Anderson]

They do go to Turkey.

[Ders]

It's cheap, cheaper.

[Adam DeVine]

Oh, it's cheaper. It's not just better.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, I thought it. I thought they knew what they were doing over there.

[Ders]

I think they do, but I also, like.

[Blake Anderson]

It's cheaper, and it's gonna look legit.

[Ders]

Yeah, it'll look legit.

[Blake Anderson]

It looks. It's gonna look. It's gonna look as good, if not better than what I got right here.

[Ders]

A lot of people will say better.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Hands down.

[Blake Anderson]

I think I would do it. Really? Yeah, I think I do the procedure.

[Ders]

Yeah. That's cool.

[Blake Anderson]

Thank you.

[Ders]

That's cool. And I like that you're being honest, because I know you want to say, like, no, no, I would do. I want the cool with the wispy and the.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, again, like, I, I'm not, I. I'm not totally afraid of the idea of, of buzzing my head. I think that that could be a cool thing. But I do think maybe I'd want to buzz it in, like, you know, do it like pink, sort of like, like flee or something.

[Ders]

Like, dude, but there's nothing to die.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, that's where I'm getting worried. I would have to, like, tattoo my head.

[Ders]

If you're an actual bald person, there's nothing to die.

[Adam DeVine]

It really is tat out the head, right?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, you just do like bam, Bam Bigelow. That would be kind of fire.

[Ders]

Dude, your first tattoo is going to be on your skull when you're bald, so then you can't ever cover it.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Like flames.

[Ders]

Okay, see, see, this is what I don't like. We're getting real, we're getting someplace. And then you make up a bunch of.

[Adam DeVine]

What's the name of the Greek stand up Greek standup guy?

[Blake Anderson]

Greeks.

[Ders]

Stabros.

[Adam DeVine]

I don't know him, but I see him in every video every day. Yeah, Stavros. Yeah, he's made it. The look.

[Blake Anderson]

See, cuz he rocks. What he's got. It looks awesome. I love it.

[Adam DeVine]

But he knows what he's doing also. He's like, he's cultivated a look as opposed to, like, you've got a look. He's being a guy who works at Wells Fargo who's like, janine, can you pick that up?

[Blake Anderson]

Yes. But also, he could have looked himself in the mirror and gone like, this is not, you know, this is not the coolest hairstyle, but as long as you embrace it and you love yourself for who you are and what the Lord bestowed upon you, it works.

[Ders]

Absolutely.

[Adam DeVine]

That's what I'm saying. But he knows what he's doing. As far as mixing it with glasses from the 80s. He's got hair and glasses from the 80s.

[Blake Anderson]

Sure.

[Adam DeVine]

Which we all look back on fondly.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes.

[Adam DeVine]

Right. He's kind of cracked the code. You wouldn't just be like, I'll crack the code. I'll crack my code.

[Blake Anderson]

I would. If I started to have like the clumps and like this, I'd probably start wearing a lot of leather jackets, you know, like a lot of like.

[Ders]

But Blake, so you're. Now you got scared and you pivoted off what you just said that you would do.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, no, because.

[Adam DeVine]

No, we're just. Adam, we're just talking.

[Blake Anderson]

We're running through the options we're running through.

[Adam DeVine]

We're doing two episodes.

[Blake Anderson]

We're running through the options. I'm just saying, okay, I could make. I could make either of them work. You know, sometimes life hands you lemonades and you gotta blow em up and you gotta make C4 lemonade energy drink and just make it work for you. Because what if. What if I don't have the money? What if I don't have the money? The transplant.

[Ders]

No, no, you do.

[Blake Anderson]

I know, but now we're going walking.

[Ders]

I'm.

[Blake Anderson]

Let's put myself in different shoes. Where we're not.

[Ders]

It's. You're in your shoes. You're not in different shoes. We're talking about you and shoes in your life.

[Blake Anderson]

Right?

[Ders]

And what would you actually do? For real? Not some made up thing. Would you pivot and, you know, maybe gain 150 pound and become Savros?

[Adam DeVine]

If you're listening, if we were in person, Adam would be holding Blake down right now.

[Blake Anderson]

I've seen it before with a wie hanging.

[Adam DeVine]

This is why we can't do it in one room. I mean, it gets too physical.

[Blake Anderson]

It would just turn into boxing matches.

[Adam DeVine]

Adam slams a ghost.

[Blake Anderson]

What. What happened? Like, you know when sports stars have to make big decisions and they're like, I need time to be with my family and, like, think about it. I would have to be with my family and. And we'd have to discuss it.

[Adam DeVine]

Right.

[Blake Anderson]

But what.

[Ders]

Why is it that big of a decision? Like, we all know a ton of other comedians that have done it. Like, Anders Santino has done it.

[Adam DeVine]

Theo. What, the hair plugs?

[Ders]

Oh, yeah. Theo Andrew. Joel McHale has done it like five times. He's. Every time I see him, he's talking to me about hair plugs.

[Adam DeVine]

He's like the king, right?

[Ders]

He showed me photos of him before. It was crazy. And then now he looks. I mean, he's got a great head hair. Same with Santino. When Santino. I kind of forgot that he got them. And then he. He mentioned it not too long ago, and I was like, like, yeah. I forgot that when we were in the clubs together, like in our 20s, you were balding, and then he just went and got it. I think it's.

[Blake Anderson]

I gotta go.

[Ders]

It's so just. People are just open and honest about it now because it looks so good. Like, it would. I feel like you would want to.

[Blake Anderson]

That's amazing.

[Ders]

You're, like, more scared of it if it turns out ugly, right?

[Blake Anderson]

Well, yeah, because then you got to.

[Ders]

Tell people, I got hair plugs and it looks like. But when it looks great, you're like, oh, yeah, I got it. Look. Look how great it is. Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

You're hoping it's not that you always have to address.

[Adam DeVine]

You know what, though? I mean, I feel like you. Blake, you just for, like, comedy juice. And I don't mean to be looked at and seen as funny, but just to be looked at and laughed at long enough that you get funnier, and then you get the hair plugs. Because I look at this picture of Santino, and I go, oh, this guy. He's got to have comebacks. He's got to be quick with the tongue.

[Blake Anderson]

Right.

[Adam DeVine]

With what's happening up here, because he looks very young here. He looks like he's in college in this picture, and he's already pretty thin.

[Ders]

No. 2011. He's not in college.

[Adam DeVine]

Sorry. I'm on the Internet. Are you somewhere?

[Ders]

I'm not. No one to me. Oh, yeah. I'm on the link that Todd just sent. But you see. And not even the link. The photo.

[Adam DeVine]

But I just pulled up the same armpit person.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, God. What are you doing? Dir.

[Adam DeVine]

I can't. I hit the wrong link. I. I'll just leave it here, I guess. No, I'm looking at what I. What appears to be, like, a college picture.

[Ders]

Sure.

[Blake Anderson]

And you think that kind of your. Your defaults or whatever sort of forge.

[Ders]

And I'm not throwing Santino under the bus or like, he's been out and. And open with. With getting this done before, and so. So is Theo, so I feel like we could talk about it, but I think he looks great. I think he looks great now.

[Adam DeVine]

And, look, he can bring up your penis enlargement.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

This is fine.

[Ders]

It's science.

[Adam DeVine]

Oh, have you not. It didn't.

[Ders]

It didn't. Oh, did you never. My. My t. Rejected it.

[Adam DeVine]

They did my balls by accident.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm just back to hanging fish weights from my dick to stretch it out.

[Adam DeVine]

God, that'd be a nightmare. To go get a penis enlargement and then have the doctor, like, put his hand on your shoulder and go, everything went perfectly. Your balls are bigger than ever. And you just go, huh?

[Blake Anderson]

What's that?

[Adam DeVine]

I think if I was that doctor, I would do that every time. Just kidding. Your is beautiful.

[Blake Anderson]

Now, I heard there's actually a term for when you try to, like, stretch your penis to make it longer. I think it's called guelking.

[Adam DeVine]

I don't know. I think I heard that maybe there's this. And anyway, I've heard.

[Ders]

I Think I've heard. Yeah, I don't know.

[Adam DeVine]

Maybe unreal. Unreal.

[Ders]

Possibly. There's this thing called ging. Have you guys ever do that? Done that? Or would it be cool?

[Adam DeVine]

Because it started in ancient Sumerian days.

[Blake Anderson]

Guys, I don't. And we could keep this kind of talk to a minimum today, because I don't want to really dive into it.

[Adam DeVine]

It's got an interesting history, but I.

[Blake Anderson]

Believe it's called Gelkin and. Or joking, one or the other.

[Adam DeVine]

Interestingly enough, it started at the exact same time in four different places on the planet.

[Blake Anderson]

But, guys, I really would like to keep this talk to a minimum today.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, all right. Same. All right.

[Blake Anderson]

But honestly.

[Ders]

Yeah, we don't want to get into this today.

[Adam DeVine]

So we're talking about guilt. The shocker. This is where you hang your something from your dick to make it longer.

[Blake Anderson]

It's like stretching exercises. So it's a lot of tugging and pulling and massaging.

[Adam DeVine]

Hey, I'm doing that.

[Ders]

Hey.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, but it's funny. I'm joking.

[Ders]

I'm just joking in here.

[Blake Anderson]

I was joking with.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, I was joking.

[Ders]

I'm wearing my Oculus Rift. Just joking real quick. Just joking.

[Blake Anderson]

Just joking. Kids, come on.

[Adam DeVine]

You know what? I feel like if joking worked, a.

[Ders]

Lot of people, yeah, we would all be joking. But see, I like this. This podcast has become like a men's health podcast. We just kind of go into, you know, our love of energy drinks, hair plug, balding, how to make your dick. I don't even know. Bigger. It's. It's stretchier.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, I think it. I think it. Maybe it begins to get accustomed, because.

[Ders]

If you stretch your. Your penis out and you stretch it out. Stretch it out.

[Adam DeVine]

Mine.

[Ders]

When the blood goes into it, is it. Would it get, like, hard, or would it just sort of be, like, limp and like. Like a limp noodle? Like, is there. Because if the same amount of blood is rushing into the area right now, there's more area.

[Blake Anderson]

Maybe stretching it is about kind of opening the floodgates a little bit. Like, opening. Yeah, opening your blood gates in your. A little bit. And let's keep it to a minimum.

[Adam DeVine]

But again, if it worked starting in eighth grade, we're all doing it. We'd all get the Gilking guide to whatever the galaxy.

[Blake Anderson]

What is it? Idiots Guide.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, we get Guilking for dummies.

[Blake Anderson]

We'd be doing it for dummies, baby. Have you clicked the Kelking link yet?

[Ders]

I saw somewhere that, like, the complete Idiot's Guide. Whatever. Like, that world just sold for like hundreds of millions of dollars or tens of millions of dollars or something.

[Adam DeVine]

Great brand for like.

[Ders]

We're gonna exploit this in movies and television. I'm like, you what it now, dude?

[Adam DeVine]

It was in. What's it called? Two Kids Movie. I just saw it.

[Blake Anderson]

Whatever.

[Ders]

Kids.

[Adam DeVine]

Zootope. Zootopia 2. They have like a Partners for Dummies book or whatever. And I was like, oh, really?

[Blake Anderson]

I haven't seen them For Dummies book in. That wasn't the 90s. That was like in the 2000s.

[Adam DeVine]

By the way, which came first, For Dummies or Complete Idiots Guide 2? Which one was first? Because they're the same thing, right? Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Which one has the little dude with the glasses? What? What has the. The little dude with the glasses on the COVID Is that the Dummies? He's got like the little.

[Adam DeVine]

I. I don't want to say. I couldn't. I don't want to be wrong.

[Blake Anderson]

I feel like there's a really cool mascot on the. The Dummies ones. I almost just threw up.

[Ders]

Durs talk. So if you.

[Blake Anderson]

There he is. There's my guy.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

How to Fix Everything for Dummies. Yeah. Yeah. I guess that is different than a Complete Idiot's Guide.

[Adam DeVine]

Complete Idiot's Guide. And then blah, blah, blah. For Dummies.

[Blake Anderson]

I find For Dummies superior. That is my reference book. I love the For Dummies series because it has that guy.

[Ders]

I think I could do both.

[Blake Anderson]

It has that massive. That might be my first tat on my head when I shave it.

[Adam DeVine]

I like the idea that Blake goes both. Wait, fuck. You can do both? No.

[Blake Anderson]

How to fix every For Dummies is the name I trust.

[Adam DeVine]

I think we had a Complete Idiot's Guide to like history or something at my house.

[Blake Anderson]

You can tell. You can tell you're not a dummy's family because I couldn't even read it. You guys were complete idiots and my families was Dummies.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

My family couldn't afford. Wouldn't buy books.

[Adam DeVine]

My family.

[Blake Anderson]

My family doesn't read.

[Adam DeVine]

Right.

[Ders]

Family wouldn't buy us books.

[Adam DeVine]

We didn't.

[Blake Anderson]

We just didn't look. Up. Up. We'll find out the hard way.

[Adam DeVine]

This is important. As presented by Heineken 00. You know, it's funny. People turn into full on detectives the second I show up with a Heineken 00. Suddenly I'm getting all the questions, like, dry January. Hey, are you training? Doing some big new wellness thing? And half the time I'm like, guys, relax. There's no headline. Honestly, I just like having a great tasting, alcohol free option that fits wherever I am. Weekday dinners, office hangs, backyard nights, or those quick gatherings that somehow turn into hours. It works for pretty much any moment. No explanation needed. Sometimes you just want to Enjoy a nice Heineken 00 and there doesn't need to be any fuss about it. And sure, a lot of people jump into dry January after the holidays, but enjoying a Heineken 00 doesn't require a challenge or resolution. Sometimes it's just as simple as I want something that tastes great. Zero alcohol. Great taste. Now you can available at your local Heineken retailer or for [e-mail] must be 21 or older to purchase. Enjoy Heineken responsibly.

[Blake Anderson]

So I've got a question for all my gamers out there. Are you seriously going to miss out on Alienware, Alienware's biggest gaming sale of the year? I mean, these are Cyber Monday prices. So it's not just another sale. No, this is some pretty big bang for your buck. You know, it's Alienware with some of the most advanced engineering out there with systems at the top of reviewers list. And what about a gift for yourself? Yeah, gift yourself a new Alienware 16 Area 51 gaming laptop. You deserve it. Okay, do it. This thing's got performance at the absolute next level with Intel Core Ultra processors. And even better, you can get it during Cyber Monday. Plus you can save on all kinds of displays and accessories like, I don't know, the Alienware 32 4K QD OLED gaming monitor for ultimate visual fidelity. These really are incredible deals on PCs with otherworldly performance. So visit alienware.com deals soon and grab what you can before the lowest prices of the year here go dark.

[Ders]

All right, legends, you know we're all about the important stuff. Like what are you wearing around the house? If your answer is a towel barely hanging on, it's time for an upgrade. We're talking about dude robe. The robe that went viral on shark tank. Over 300,000 guys have already made the switch.

[Adam DeVine]

Oh yeah, it looks like a hoodie. Feels like a post shower victory.

[Blake Anderson]

And.

[Adam DeVine]

And it's made with their proprietary weekend blend fabric. So every day feels like the weekend hoodie. On the outside, towel lined on the inside, non floppy sleeves, built in belt. You can't lose. And yeah, there's a secret pocket too. They even have matching shorts and pants so you can lounge like a legend mate without risking the old dick slip.

[Blake Anderson]

It's the robe you'll throw on and never want to take off. Better hide it before the wife steals it. With the holidays coming up, it's the perfect gift for all the special dudes in your life. Your brother, your dad, your best bud, or that guy still rocking gym shorts from college. Go to duderobe.com and use code thisis for 15% off. That's this is you deserve better. So ditch your shitty loungewear and upgrade to dude robe today. Make your home smell as good as it looks with Pura 4, the smart fragrance diffuser that lets you control your scent from anywhere. Choose from hundreds of premium fragrances, schedule your favorites and set the perfect mood for every moment. And right now, get yours free when you subscribe to 2 cents for 12 months. Don't wait. This limited time offer won't last. Try it risk free for 30 days [e-mail].

[Ders]

You know that feeling when you come home late from work and those puppy dog eyes just pierce right through your soul? Or when you're packing for a trip and your cat refuses to leave the suitcase? Aw buddy, I can't take you with me. Yeah, we've all been there. Pet parent guilt is real. And you know what? It's completely normal.

[Blake Anderson]

Nothing is worse than leaving your pet home alone for a period of time. Especially when you're packing for a trip. You see your dog sitting in the suit suitcase with those sad puppy dog eyes. It kills you. That's exactly why Hill's Pet Nutrition exists. They understand that being a pet parent means being human. With all our imperfections and daily juggling.

[Adam DeVine]

Acts, Hill's science led nutrition helps you give more love than humanly possible. Whether it's those long work days or trying to balance attention between multiple pets. Hill's Pet Nutrition gets it. They've created science based nutrition that supports your pet's lifelong health so you can feel confident even when life gets hectic because you're only human. There's Hills. Science does more Ready to let go the guilt? Find the right [e-mail] iheart that's hillspet.com iheart if my hair started falling out Adam would I get it bit?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, now that I've been sauteed.

[Ders]

And I know you're not a very vain person and I like that about.

[Adam DeVine]

You durst but well, my teeth are fake. I don't know.

[Ders]

Well that's true. Teeth are fake. You had. You had some coke bottle glasses and.

[Adam DeVine]

Now you personality's fake.

[Blake Anderson]

You joke all the time and we'll keep that.

[Ders]

And you, you lasered your eyes.

[Adam DeVine]

I Do think it's. I did. I never had coke bottle glasses. Like, I never had glasses where, like, you looked at my eyes and they were.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Apple bottom jeans, which was always tragic. I didn't understand when people had those glasses. I was like, you find regular ones that don't make your eyes insanely crazy huge.

[Ders]

My wife's glasses are insane. She's so blind. Like, truly blind.

[Blake Anderson]

When Chloe puts her glasses on, her eyes get way smaller. They're like. Right. Like, the. The lenses are so fucking thick.

[Ders]

I think it's the opposite. I think they get huge.

[Adam DeVine]

She looks like Battle for Alita.

[Blake Anderson]

You know when people wear glasses and it makes. Makes. It makes like, the eyes smaller behind the lens because they're so thick.

[Adam DeVine]

No, she doesn't want to get just. Just laser those doggies.

[Ders]

I think she's scared, too, and. And maybe her eyes are, like, too far gone to do that.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, they're like. This is.

[Adam DeVine]

Well, what do I know? I don't know.

[Ders]

Yeah, I don't. I don't. Yeah. I don't really know why she doesn't, but she.

[Adam DeVine]

I guess I would probably get the plugs.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

I don't know.

[Ders]

I mean, we all know where I stand.

[Blake Anderson]

You're in.

[Ders]

I'm getting the plugs. I'm getting the plugs. I mean, I might get them now. And I, like, my hair is perfectly fine. I might get it. So my hair starts right here.

[Adam DeVine]

Hey, weird. I want a widow's peak that goes to the tip of my nose.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't think you need to, but, like, there's so much preventative stuff now. Like, honestly, like, hymns. I think him's.

[Ders]

Oh, we're talking him.

[Blake Anderson]

The way to go.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah, Just a brand of everything, right?

[Blake Anderson]

Is it. I thought they made. I mean, we read enough ads.

[Adam DeVine]

I thought you could get, like, hymns. That was like, him. Viagra. Him's hair stuff. It's like they use the generics.

[Ders]

Yeah, I think so. I think that is the case.

[Adam DeVine]

I have no idea. I don't. I feel like I'm already 44. It's a good age to lose your hair.

[Ders]

You're a monster.

[Adam DeVine]

I'm married. Like, I feel like this is something you do when you're in your 20s and losing it and every girl just looks at your forehead and goes, next.

[Ders]

I'm good.

[Blake Anderson]

They don't make eye contact.

[Ders]

Dude, I. I was losing my hair.

[Blake Anderson]

Hair.

[Ders]

I don't know if you remember this, Blake. I probably wouldn't shut up about it, but in college, I was losing my hair. I was like. I would take a shower, and there would be, like, hundreds of hair. Little hairs in my hands.

[Blake Anderson]

I thought those were pubes.

[Adam DeVine]

Blake was just sprinkling his own hairs over.

[Ders]

And it wasn't hundreds, but it was dozens and dozens. Every time I. I would ch. And then I would, like, put them. I would, like, freak out and put, like, smack my hand against the. The wall of the shower and then count the them. And my roommate Austin was like, what the fuck? Is there, like, your hair all over the shower? Because I was freaking the fuck out.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, you were. You were probably stressing your hair out. It was falling out because of that. And also, you were probably just living off of energy drinks and.

[Adam DeVine]

And fucking malt liquor.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

Yep. Yeah, you're. You're absolutely right.

[Blake Anderson]

Your hair.

[Ders]

And then it stopped.

[Adam DeVine]

I do love the idea of having a roommate who goes, who. I go, why is there hair all over the wall of the shower? He goes, I'm freaking out. I'm losing my hair. And I just go, hey, man, I'm sorry to hear that. Don't put it on the wall.

[Blake Anderson]

Clean up your fucking hair, dude. No, I'm doing.

[Ders]

Yes. And that. That's. That would be perfectly, totally fine thing to say to me. And. And I did. You know, it was only a few times that I did that, so I could. Cause I was like. Cause I don't know, I think maybe my mom was like, was it 10 hairs or is it 50 hairs? And I'm like. Like, I'm going to count them. And so I did, and I'm like, 66 hairs or whatever the number was. And I remember just freaking out about it. And then after, like, a month or two of that, where I think, like, I'm going to go bald. I was not even 20 yet. That's life. And I'm like, I'm. I'm going bald. And then it just stopped.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, but, Adam, imagine if you did.

[Adam DeVine]

What was it? We got to circle. We got to figure this out.

[Ders]

I don't know.

[Blake Anderson]

Imagine if you did. And he. He just would have been so cool if you were bald this whole time.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah. You looked like Matt Damon in that one movie.

[Blake Anderson]

Do you think we still would have got Workaholics?

[Adam DeVine]

No.

[Ders]

No, I don't.

[Blake Anderson]

If the mamp was a bald character.

[Ders]

I don't think so.

[Adam DeVine]

I mean, I agree only because I think it's Scotty who always says this. He goes, sometimes I go back and watch episodes of Workaholics from season one, and you guys are just children in an Office.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

And he's like. And that's half what the joke is, is that you guys are so young in an office. Office. And so if you were bald. Yeah. It might have. You know, because Robbie, the. The drug.

[Blake Anderson]

The.

[Adam DeVine]

The drug tester, he's bald. And if you're bald and he's bald.

[Blake Anderson]

It'S almost like Brian. Husky.

[Adam DeVine]

Brian, Husky. Funniest person.

[Blake Anderson]

But we love him. He really is.

[Adam DeVine]

It kind of doesn't work as well.

[Ders]

That's right. Yeah, you're right. That was part of what the charm of workaholics is. We did look like tr. Like actual kids in the. In working in office with. Which is what the youngest people in your office look like.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Which is so funny. I love that. I love that you guys were at a call center.

[Adam DeVine]

And you know what is interesting is we. We were the dumbest people in the office, but we liked. We had the most fun, and we made fun of everybody in that office. I think that young people now think they're the smartest people in the office.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, okay. Okay.

[Adam DeVine]

That's just what I hear from almost everyone who's like, we just hired a millennial. Younger than millennial, I guess, like Gen Z. Gen Z. And they're like, they walk around like they own the place, and it's a little off putting. You are so dumb.

[Ders]

What? Bosses can no longer, like, be mean.

[Blake Anderson]

Right?

[Ders]

Can be mean principles. Or not even mean. Like, stern. You can't even be stern right to your employee anymore.

[Blake Anderson]

That's so wild.

[Adam DeVine]

I will say this. I remember getting yelled at at an office and then being like, oh, I no longer take this guy seriously. You know, I mean, like, he, like, lost it about, like, a printer or something. And I was like, I love that.

[Ders]

Well, there's a difference between, like, losing it and being like, hey, you have to come on time. There's no being five minutes late. There's no being three minutes late. You have to be here on time or five minutes early.

[Adam DeVine]

Exactly.

[Ders]

Like, you can't even say that anymore. Like, you could get written up for that.

[Adam DeVine]

You know, comedy's dead too.

[Ders]

Yeah, I know. I. I feel like an old man talking about this, but I. I had a friend, Comedy, who. He fired his assistant because that assistant called in sick for work.

[Adam DeVine]

Right.

[Ders]

Every Monday for six weeks in a row.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And he could not say when he fired that assistant that that was the reason.

[Adam DeVine]

Right.

[Ders]

Because you can't fire someone for being sick.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh.

[Ders]

Even though it was only on Mondays.

[Adam DeVine]

Right, right.

[Ders]

Six weeks in a row.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

So they had to come up with another reason. And there were other legitimate reasons, but, like, you can't even say to your employee, like, hey, I know what the going on. You're 22 years old. You. On Mondays, you're hungover because you partied all weekend. You still have to come into the office on Mondays. You can't be sick every Monday, right?

[Adam DeVine]

I wonder. I wonder if there's been studies about mental health days that are taken, because I. I feel like we have never taken a mental health day.

[Blake Anderson]

No, it's awesome.

[Adam DeVine]

I'm just asking, have you guys ever been like, I can't come in today. I'm just not feeling up to it.

[Blake Anderson]

It's not. I was raised.

[Adam DeVine]

But anyway. Anyway, I just.

[Ders]

No, Realistically, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Blake doesn't want to get real today.

[Blake Anderson]

Anders, I'm being serious. That's not how I was raised.

[Adam DeVine]

Blake, remember, we've got two episodes to do. Let's get real just for a little.

[Blake Anderson]

That's not how I was raised, man. That's.

[Adam DeVine]

I. I wonder if there's been studies that have shown that mental. Taking a mental health day is actually beneficial or not.

[Blake Anderson]

Dude, we didn't even acknowledge anxiety in when we were kids. Like, that's not. That wasn't even a thing. So how would we have a mental health day?

[Adam DeVine]

Adam's hair's falling out. He's like, mom, I don't know. Anyway, I got to go to the grocery store and go slice.

[Blake Anderson]

Adam, is it 100 or is it hair going into.

[Adam DeVine]

In the sandwiches?

[Blake Anderson]

Adam, if it's 50, shut the up and go make sandwiches. If it's 100, yeah, you're okay. And go make sandwiches. You're. Either way, you're, bud, get to work.

[Adam DeVine]

And I guess I'm like. And I don't know. That's why I'm just saying it in front of an international audience. That will be recorded forever.

[Blake Anderson]

Like, yes.

[Adam DeVine]

Don't you still have anxiety?

[Ders]

It's science.

[Adam DeVine]

Even if you're like, I don't know.

[Ders]

You'Re just at home that day. Like, shouldn't you go to work and make some money?

[Adam DeVine]

I had anxiety then, and I have anxiety now. But, like, now I'm told I can, like, chill about. I guess I just don't know.

[Blake Anderson]

You're saying, what do you. What do you actually do with a mental health day? Like, what is.

[Ders]

Well, no, I think. I think sometimes it's fine, like, if your dad just passed away or something. Like someone close to you just passed away, then. Yeah. You could take some time for sure, and then. But then you got to gather your. And come back to work, right?

[Adam DeVine]

Oh, this is a cool movie. So someone keeps killing people to get. Get mental health.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, yeah.

[Ders]

They're like. Like, my best friend just died, so.

[Blake Anderson]

And they're like, I needed.

[Ders]

Yes.

[Blake Anderson]

And by the. By the third one, they start checking, and then they're like, wait, they really are dying. He's not lying.

[Adam DeVine]

That's a lot of dogs, right?

[Blake Anderson]

That's a ton of dogs dying.

[Adam DeVine]

That's so many dogs.

[Ders]

He actually did have 12 dogs that live in his house, and they're all dying.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah. Hell, then they. Then they go to the pound, and they're like, oh, the dog died guy. He just.

[Ders]

Yeah, that's the movie.

[Blake Anderson]

That's the movie.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah. I just. I'm like, you know, if. If you're a. If you're like a cop and you're having a bad day, I'm sorry. Go to work. Okay.

[Ders]

Go to work.

[Blake Anderson]

Hold up.

[Ders]

Load your gun.

[Adam DeVine]

Power through. Okay.

[Blake Anderson]

Obviously, take it out on.

[Ders]

Take that. That taser out and go to work.

[Blake Anderson]

And go hand out some tickets. All right.

[Adam DeVine]

But I guess I'm like. Like, if you're doing a mental health day, what is the protocol? Like, if you're. If you're taking a sick day and genuinely, you're sick, you're chilling, you're laying up, you're. You're catching up on your shows, you're hydrating, right? If you're taking a mental health day, what is the protocol? What are you doing?

[Ders]

You're drinking.

[Adam DeVine]

What are you doing? So that the next day you're ready.

[Blake Anderson]

I think Adam's got. The survey said 100.

[Ders]

100 people said jerking off.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes. You're jerking. You're gking. You're setting up your. You're setting up your diffuser, your humidifier, you kind of getting the. The vibes going.

[Adam DeVine]

What is the thing? I. Because I understand the concept of mental health day. Okay, so what. What's. What are we doing then on that day off? You're running errands. You're jacking off and running errands.

[Blake Anderson]

Right?

[Ders]

It's science. How many mental health days can you take? Like, you're. And what's up about a mental health day is your boss can't say you've taken too many mental health days, or is there a number? Let's see. I don't know. I don't work in an office.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't think there is.

[Adam DeVine]

I think a mental health day is a sick Day. I think they're the same thing.

[Blake Anderson]

They just can't be denied and you can't be punished. Like, you treat them the same way. Like, mental health day is as undeniable as a sick day. We don't want you coming in on.

[Adam DeVine]

A bad day misnomer. Because it may not be a single day. It could be used to describe an hour, half day, or even a month away from stressful situations.

[Blake Anderson]

Hey, I'm down for that. I think that's sick.

[Ders]

It is sick. Until, like, you're the boss and you're trying to run a business, and you're like, man, all of my employees just left for a month because they want to chill and just, like, maybe go to Coachella and, like, yeah, like, you.

[Blake Anderson]

It's a bummer for your workforce for sure.

[Guest/Announcer]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

But, yeah, you know, I get. Dude.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

I just love that they go. It could be an hour or a month.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, man. It might be a camping trip.

[Adam DeVine]

I'm sorry. If you need a month off, you know what would relieve the stress? Quit your job.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, dude.

[Ders]

Yeah. Then you. Then quit your job.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, I gotta pay the bill.

[Adam DeVine]

30 days reapply for that job. Hey, change your life. Go to a whole nother job. Learn the guitar. What's the protocol?

[Blake Anderson]

I love that interview. I love that interview, though. I'm better, man. I'm good. I'm good, dude. I know.

[Adam DeVine]

Actually, my name is Skyler now.

[Ders]

I had to go. I had to go camping in Yosemite for a month.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And just kind of get my mind right.

[Adam DeVine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And it's. Right now until two months from now, I'm gonna go camping at Joshua Tree.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm gonna be real with you, brother. I'm ready to deliver pizzas again.

[Adam DeVine]

Well, look. Hey, Blake. You look great. You smell awful.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, Yeah, I came straight here.

[Ders]

See, the problem. The problem, Blake, is it. It's not just like the. I understand if it's the lowest level pizza delivery guy because you. You can probably get another guy to deliver pizzas really easily, but a lot of times it's like. It's just like a junior executive. Like, they have a real responsibility in the. In the office or whatever, and they. But they're Gen Z, so they feel comfortable just being like, yeah, you know what? I. I had a really kind of stressful weekend where I did a little too many drugs. So on Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday, I. I needed to kind of chill at my house and catch up on Lioness on Paramount. Plus, where Taylor shared.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm gonna watch some dudes.

[Ders]

Taking his shirt on and off before going to work.

[Blake Anderson]

Bro, I'm coming down from a peyote bender and I gotta watch some boys take their shirt shirts off.

[Adam DeVine]

I need to take a mental health break. Okay, how long? An hour? A month? Few episodes. I'm sorry, did you say episodes? Yeah, the protocol.

[Ders]

Yeah, I'm actually just gonna go in my car and jerk off to these men taking their shirts on and off and I might guilt for a minute.

[Blake Anderson]

You've been gulking during this interview.

[Adam DeVine]

I have, I have.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, guys, keep it to a minimum.

[Ders]

Any, any takebacks, any apologies, any epic slams.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh man.

[Adam DeVine]

I mean, look, hey, I, I, I'd.

[Ders]

Like to, I'm not taking it back, but Gen Z, you know, I feel like we, I take back how old we probably seemed going after the Gen Z, and I don't like that we seem old, but we are getting old.

[Adam DeVine]

Take back how old you are getting there. Interesting. Do you think they take back how young they seem? I don't think they do.

[Ders]

Okay, it's not about them. Okay, Wasn't about them. This is what we take back.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

Yeah. So I, I, I don't like that we seem so old, but we are sold. So I guess I'm not taking it back.

[Adam DeVine]

I, I mean, I was almost with you about just, just going hey, I don't know. But that's kind of my question is, is like, is are the numbers there where it's like a, it actually does work. It's working. Everyone's happier. I don't know if those numbers are there. Everyone seems more miserable.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. Who knows? You know, we're speaking from a place, but the, the workforce and the amount of, of time people have to work, it's, it's, it's not fun. It's not good.

[Ders]

Well, dude, work isn't fun.

[Adam DeVine]

I know, but I remember when I was young and I was working like crazy and it's like kind of what you just do.

[Ders]

Yeah. I work 60 hours a week in a, in a service deli, dude. It's, it wasn't fun, but I had to like pay the bills and you know, make sure I had spectrum cable.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, but with AI and everything, we're not going to need to have jobs anymore. And it's going to fucking rock, dude. And life will be a mental health life safe, baby.

[Ders]

You think that's how it's gonna pan out? Is everyone's just gonna. Yeah.

[Adam DeVine]

Free money.

[Ders]

All right. That'd be. Hey.

[Blake Anderson]

Hell yeah. We shall see. Well, yeah.

[Ders]

Do you have a take back.

[Adam DeVine]

No, no, I was just gonna say.

[Ders]

Well, or is that another episode?

[Guest/Announcer]

Gotcha.

[Adam DeVine]

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[Blake Anderson]

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[Adam DeVine]

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[Ders]

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[Blake Anderson]

Season 2 of unrivaled basketball is here and the talent is unreal. Paige Beckers, Nafiza Collier, Kelsey Plumb, Brianna Stewart and more are back to redefine the game. Unrivaled basketball season two, sponsored by Samsung Galaxy, tips off January 5 on TNT, TruTV and HBO.

[Guest/Announcer]

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[Blake Anderson]

Guaranteed Human.