This Is Woman's Work with Nicole Kalil
Episode: How To Rewire Patterns That No Longer Serve You with Judy Wilkins-Smith | 323
Release Date: July 2, 2025
Introduction: Unveiling Emotional DNA
Timestamp: [01:10]
Nicole Kalil kicks off the episode by delving into the profound concept of Emotional DNA. She introduces the idea that our genetic makeup influences not just our physical traits but also our thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and overall success. Nicole emphasizes the importance of understanding these inherited patterns to break free from generational constraints.
Notable Quote:
“If you keep hitting the same roadblocks in life, it might not just be you, it might be your great great grandmother's unresolved baggage that's running the show.”
— Nicole Kalil [02:30]
Understanding Genealogy 3.0
Timestamp: [04:37]
Judy Wilkins-Smith introduces the concept of Genealogy 3.0, building upon traditional genealogical studies (Genealogy 1.0 and 2.0). She explains how Genealogy 3.0 goes beyond tracing lineage to decoding the subconscious blueprints left by our ancestors. This approach examines how historical events and familial experiences shape our current emotional and behavioral patterns through epigenetics and systemic constellations.
Notable Quote:
“You can change that DNA, the emotional DNA, and that is part of what you were born for.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [05:10]
Systemic Work and Constellations Explained
Timestamp: [07:05]
Judy elaborates on systemic work, which studies an individual within their broader family system. She introduces constellations as a method to visualize and reconfigure familial relationships and their impact on personal challenges. By representing family members and abstract concepts like money through physical placement, individuals can uncover underlying causes of their struggles.
Notable Quote:
“When you understand why he is the way he is, suddenly he becomes a hero instead of a villain because he managed to survive.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [09:45]
Reframing vs. Affirmations
Timestamp: [12:02]
Nicole raises a crucial point distinguishing the process Judy describes from simple affirmations. Judy clarifies that constellations involve an embodied experience that engages the head, heart, and gut, making the reframing process more impactful than repetitive affirmations alone.
Notable Quote:
“Affirmations stay in the brain, but when they hit the heart and the gut and all agree, that becomes your new truth.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [12:32]
Identifying Limiting Patterns
Timestamp: [17:54]
Nicole asks for practical advice on identifying limiting, systemic, and epigenetic patterns. Judy advises listeners to reflect on recurring frustrations and limitations in their lives. By documenting thoughts, feelings, and actions related to specific areas of struggle, individuals can trace these patterns back to their origins.
Notable Quote:
“The biggest mistake people make is they go, ‘I'm done with you,’ you're giving your eviction notice.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [18:17]
Navigating Unknown Ancestral Histories
Timestamp: [20:13]
For those unaware of their extended family histories, Judy suggests timelining one's own life to recognize patterns. Even without detailed ancestral information, individuals can acknowledge inherited behaviors and consciously choose to set aside old patterns with respect and intention.
Notable Quote:
“Tell it, I will use you as wisdom when I need to.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [20:37]
Taking Action: From Awareness to Transformation
Timestamp: [24:16]
Judy shares a personal story illustrating the power of commitment and action in breaking free from limiting patterns. She emphasizes the importance of small, consistent steps toward one's goals and the necessity of maintaining belief and determination despite obstacles.
Notable Quote:
“When you've accomplished a dream once, I promise you it's addictive. It'll pull you out of that trance.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [24:39]
Practical Steps to Address Trauma and Limiting Beliefs
Timestamp: [25:19]
Nicole inquires about actionable strategies to overcome inherited trauma and limiting beliefs. Judy outlines a step-by-step process:
- Identify the primary desire or goal.
- List out all fears, beliefs, and actions that hinder progress.
- Determine which patterns belong to previous generations.
- Reframe these patterns with positive affirmations aligned with one's purpose.
- Create a fail-safe mechanism to counteract negative thoughts in real-time.
Notable Quote:
“Train your toilet talk. It's like taming your dragon.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [29:17]
Overcoming Blame and Embracing Personal Responsibility
Timestamp: [31:01]
Nicole addresses the temptation to blame ancestors for present struggles. Judy firmly states that individual accountability is essential. She encourages listeners to recognize that while past generations influence them, personal choices define their present and future.
Notable Quote:
“At some point you raise your damn self.”
— Judy Wilkins-Smith [31:43]
Conclusion: Empowerment Through Choice
Timestamp: [32:06]
Nicole wraps up by highlighting the power of choice in breaking free from inherited patterns. She reinforces the episode's core message that while our histories shape us, we hold the agency to redefine our narratives and forge new paths aligned with our true selves.
Notable Quote:
“Choice is always ours. And being the change agent, my friend, is what it truly means to be doing woman's work.”
— Nicole Kalil [32:41]
Key Takeaways:
- Genealogy 3.0: A modern approach to understanding and decoding inherited emotional patterns.
- Emotional DNA: Beyond physical traits, our genetic makeup includes emotional and behavioral patterns passed down through generations.
- Systemic Work and Constellations: Methods to visualize and reframe family dynamics and their impact on personal challenges.
- Reframing Over Affirmations: Engaging the heart and gut alongside the mind leads to more profound transformation.
- Identifying and Changing Patterns: Conscious recognition and deliberate action are essential to break free from limiting inherited behaviors.
- Personal Accountability: Embracing responsibility empowers individuals to redefine their narratives and achieve lasting success.
Resources Mentioned:
- Judy Wilkins-Smith’s Books:
- Hidden Power in Your DNA: How Using Genealogy to Explore Ancestral Patterns and Transform Your Life
- Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint (International Bestseller)
- Website: judywilkins-smith.com
- Social Media and YouTube: Follow Judy for more insights and resources.
Final Thoughts: This episode of This Is Woman's Work provides a comprehensive exploration of how our ancestral patterns influence our present lives and offers actionable strategies to rewire these patterns. Judy Wilkins-Smith's expertise sheds light on the intricate connections between our genetic inheritance and personal development, empowering listeners to take control of their destinies by redefining what it means to engage in true "woman's work."