Episode Overview

Podcast: This Is Woman's Work with Nicole Kalil
Episode: Restless Life Syndrome (Why I Want 14 Different Lives) | Unfiltered & Unhinged
Host: Nicole Kalil
Date: February 20, 2026

Nicole Kalil dives into the tongue-in-cheek, deeply relatable sensation she calls "Restless Life Syndrome"—the desire to live not just one, but 14 wildly different lives. Inspired by a substack from Nora McInerney, Nicole explores the curious longing for a multitude of experiences, the struggle against traditional “shoulds,” and the unapologetic embrace of a big, sometimes impractical, always audacious list of dreams. This episode is all about ditching linear, responsible expectations and celebrating the messy, multivalent truth of womanhood today.

Main Discussion Points & Insights

Introduction to "Restless Life Syndrome"

• (00:35) Nicole describes discovering Nora McInerney’s concept, “Restless Life Syndrome,” and immediately self-diagnosing herself.
  • She humorously acknowledges “diagnosing” herself with all manner of late-night Google-search inspired illnesses.
  • “It does explain a lot. It's that feeling that I'm not necessarily dissatisfied, just restless, curious, convinced there are at least 14 other lives I'm supposed to be living and somehow I'm supposed to live them all in this one lifetime.”

Nicole’s “14 Lives” Wish List

• (02:08) Nicole, inspired by Nora, reads her own big, not-at-all-reasonable wish list—to live all the lives she dreams of.
  • Living abroad: Somewhere walkable, three-hour lunches, linen pants.
  • Taking a sabbatical: Recovering from productivity culture by glorifying “lying down until further notice.”
  • Learning a historic craft: Candle making, knitting, something “wholesome and meditative” to escape capitalism.
  • Absorbing Italian: Not through classes, but “osmosis, gelato, and pasta.”
  • Learning gluten-free sourdough: “...but I'm married to someone with an intolerance, so realistically, Jay will end up making it while I sit nearby with a block of cheese calling it teamwork.”
  • Living on a farm with goats and chickens: While also wanting an urban existence, walking to coffee shops and bookstores—admitting to “both multitudes and denial.”

Rich, Relatable Anecdotes & Self-Awareness

• (03:39) Nicole details mundane yet whimsical ambitions:
  • Working in a bookstore: Not managing or committing, just loitering, drinking coffee, and giving unsolicited book recommendations—“That one changed my life, I'll say about every third book they touch.”
  • Creating a gathering place for women with her sister: “Circle of trust meets a collective exhale with snacks and lots of swearing ... we cackle because we want to.”
  • DIY home projects: Dreaming of “just opening up that wall” without the financial and emotional disaster or double-charging contractor.
  • Epic mom-daughter trips: Unscripted adventures, “terrified it’ll involve a Taylor Swift pilgrimage and roller coasters,” contrasted with a wine-laden, laughter-filled trip with her mom.

Humor and Hyperbole

• (05:18) Nicole embraces the ridiculous:
  • A “gaggle of pugs”: “A small army of flat-faced, snorting little potatoes who follow me everywhere ... People will say ‘that seems excessive’ and they’ll be right.”
  • Epic girls' trip: “No plans, no purpose, no pretending. Just beaches, laughter that turns feral, and women who love you exactly as you are—unfiltered, unshowered, and somehow more yourself than you've been in months.”
  • Reading 100 books in a year—none about leadership, purely for escape.
  • Fitness ambition ambivalence: “Maybe I want to squat my body weight. Or don't. I can't really tell if I want to or if I just want to want to. Because fitness culture doesn't know what to do with women who are content.”

Celebrating Contradiction and Unapologetic Desires

• (06:48) Nicole continues exploring paradoxical dreams:
  • Tourist in her own town: Boston’s witch trial history and the oldest independent bookstore in America.
  • Learning witchcraft: “Or something else that scares people a little. You know, because being an independent woman is so scary, you have to call them witches. I'm not hexing anyone. At least not yet.”

The Antidote to Burnout: Remembering Life

• (08:05) Nicole clarifies her priorities:
  • “Do I have work goals? Of course I do. But when I get restless, it's rarely because I've lost focus at work. It's because I've forgotten about life.”
  • She frames “Restless Life Syndrome” as the explanation for “the 12 open tabs, the impulse to burn it all down and start over, the deep conviction that fulfillment is just one hobby spell or home renovation away.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On restlessness and possibility:
  “It's that feeling that I'm not necessarily dissatisfied, just restless, curious, convinced that there are at least 14 other lives that I'm supposed to be living and somehow I'm supposed to live them all in this one lifetime.” (01:12, Nicole)
• On ambition vs. desire:
  “In case you're wondering, I am aware that this isn't a reasonable list. That doesn't prevent me from really wanting to do things like learn how to bake a really good gluten free sourdough ...” (02:45, Nicole)
• On contradictory dreams:
  “It's delusional. I still want it. Apparently I contain both multitudes and denial.” (03:20, Nicole)
• On hypothetical entrepreneurship:
  “I just want to sit by the candlelight muttering 'this used to be woman's work' while stabbing something with purpose or creating something that I can burn ... until I start an Etsy shop and ruin it all.” (02:33, Nicole)
• On redefining woman’s work:
  “We're shedding expectations, setting aside the ‘shoulds’, giving our finger to the ‘supposed tos’. We're torching the old playbook and writing our own rules.” (00:01, Nicole, thematic excerpt)
• On writing your own list:
  “Are you feeling restless? Good. Now go write your own list. There's no right or wrong way to do it. Actually, I take that back. There is a right way. It's big, audacious, slightly unhinged. And there is a wrong way. It's practical, linear, responsible, and boring.” (08:44, Nicole)

Key Timestamps

• 00:35 – Introduction; what inspired the episode
• 01:12 – “Restless Life Syndrome” described
• 02:08-06:48 – Nicole’s “14 lives” list: dreams, ambitions, contradictions
• 07:51 – Reflections on work vs. life restlessness
• 08:44 – Encouragement for listeners to write their own audacious lists
• 09:46 – (Ads begin; content ends)

Episode Tone and Takeaways

Nicole combines humor, self-awareness, and heartfelt honesty, championing the beautiful messiness of women’s desires. She validates feeling pulled in a thousand creative, contradictory directions and insists that no dream—no matter how impractical or unhinged—is “too much.” The episode’s ultimate message: Forget chasing linear progress or one-size-fits-all definitions. Instead, honor your “Restless Life Syndrome” and give yourself permission to want it all, even if just on paper.

Final rallying cry:
“Who runs the world? You decide. Because that is Woman's Work.”

For further reading (and the unfiltered continuation of Nicole’s thoughts), visit her substack.