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Theo Von
Zootopia 2 has come home to Disney. Let's go get ready for a new case. We're the greatest partners of all time.
Jason V
New friends, Gary the Snake and your
Theo Von
last name, the snake Dream team. Get new habitats. Zootopia has a secret reptile population. You can watch the record breaking phenomenon at home. Zootopia 2, now available on Disney. Rated PG. And right now you can get Disney and hulu for just $4.99 a month for three months with a special limited time offer. Ends March 24. After three months, Plan Auto renews at 1299amonth. Terms apply. I want to wish Everybody a happy St. Patrick's Day. That's what it is, baby. St. Patty. Hey, Patty. Dude, Patty. We used to have this girl bus and her parents didn't let her do much, you know, when God didn't really let her do much. She didn't have, you know, she probably had a couple of abilities, but she would. She was in charge of bringing the garbage out to the curb, you know. And we'd be out there by the bus stop sometime and she lugged them cans on out and it was kind of like one of the only times she'd kind of go out and about. And so she'd get all dressed up and even sometimes put her mama's lipstick on and pull them garbage cans out there. And we'd be like, hey, Petty. And she would smile, bro. She smile. I mean, she would get all shy sometimes and even hide. But she would stop pulling the can and hide behind it. So she'd be hiding behind that garbage can, but we'd be like, hey, hey, Patty. Just kind of, you know, being sweet to her or whatever. Just not really flirting, but just, you know, just hey, Patty. In her. And she would just be so shy and nervous, boy, hey Patty. And she'd be pulling that can out there to curb. But she'd smile so big when we kind of like be flirting at her, you know. And her lipstick, man, she smiles so big. She'd get lipstick on her, on her earlobes, bruh. She was like that happied out. And there's something nice about that. Seeing somebody get joyed out. Happy St. Patrick's Day. Who was St. Patrick? Let me look it up real quick. Who was St. Patrick? Because I've been to some St. Patty's boy, I've been, dude, one time I was out, I remember down in Rochester downtown over there and people are getting blasted. They're just like, St. Patrick, St. Patrick. They don't even know who you know hey, Patty, people don't even know what's going on, dude. People out there just eating cigarettes and just. Dude, I had one dude, he had his kid in a. One of those wagons, like a little wagon. He had a one year old just. Or maybe a half of one year old. This probably, you know, just however much half of one is. And that was him, the baby, just a little damn manger. This motherfucker had like a little to go manger. Just. It's just some hay around that bitch. And he'd stacked a bunch of to go orders on top of that baby bro. Just to keep them warm, bro. A baby stay warm. Touch a baby bro in a. On its back or whatever. Touch it again in an hour. I bet you that bitch still warm. But yeah, this dude, he was just rolling home, bro. He had like six or seven to go order stacked on that sleeping baby bro. Bunch of garbage plates stacked on a damn four month old cut. What do we got here? St. Patrick, and this is on Perplexity. That's what I'm using. St. Patrick was a 5th century Christian missionary and bishop. He was born in Britain. At age 16, he was captured by Irish raiders and taken to Ireland as a slave where he herded animals for about six years before escaping back to his family. Let's go, Paddy. Hey, Patty. After returning home, he eventually trained for ministry and later felt called back to Ireland as a missionary. Okay. Patrick spent years traveling through parts of Ireland, preaching, baptizing founding churches and ordaining clergy. He is traditionally regarded as the first Bishop of Armagh and became the leading figure associated with Ireland's conversion from paganism to Christianity. Dang. He was that dog. He was that lord dog. Brother, we ride here. Hey, Penny. He was a lord dog. The famous story that he drove the snakes out of Ireland is considered a legend, often read symbolically, since there is no evidence Ireland had native snakes after the last ice age. Wow, so there's no snakes in Ireland, huh? They're all working in politics in Israel, I guess, or america. Anyway, happy St. Patrick's Day to everybody who's celebrating. Got my green on. I got my green on. What's cracking, dude? Not much, bro. Just got back from Alba. They put so many kirks in it, you know, by the time you're done saying it, you're gone. You already left. You're like, damn, I don't need. You know, I was there, but I couldn't say it fast enough because they had too many. Have you tried the green chilies, bro? If you haven't been To Alba, then you don't. You don't. You don't know what it's like, bro. When you get there. It's freaking. It's very Latino, you know, it's like a lot of like essays. Who never wrote any essays, bro. You know what I'm saying? Like, that it's like a. Like. But it's also like a lot of hard working good people there. A lot of kindness, bro. You know, Mexican culture, bro, they freaking. It's a blast, dude. They have a blast, bro. You know, and that most of our laborers in the u. In America, most of the hardest workers are Mexicanos. Not all of them. I'm not saying that. And everybody's kind of taking their turn over time. If you look through history, all cultures have taken their time of being hard workers. And some, you know, some are more prevalent now than others. But it's for sure they got a lot of Latinos there. Latinos are key. A key Latinos. And bro, but you got a lot of construction babies down there. Children born out on even, you know, you'll see in the street, they'll have two kids. Even. Just even the children are involved in trades. You know, I saw two kids just throwing a piece of drywall back and forth. You'll see a homeless dude, he'll have a sign, but it's written in drywall and it's really edged really well. And you know, he's got baseboard at the bottom of his sign. You know, like, even like that, you're like, damn this. You'll see a. A dog house there. Just the shingles are done really well. There's just like a Latino guy just drinking under one of the eaves of the home. But yeah, man, it's a place you. You grow to love, man. But I'll say this about Albuquerque, bro. They don't like doing two stories on nothing. Everything is just one story, bro. One. Just like only one story. It's almost like for a long time they maybe didn't have a ladder. They. And then finally they got a ladder because they'll be like 50 miles of just one story houses. Just like ranch style home. Just. Have you tried the green chilies everywhere you go to eat? We went to a place. I went to watch my friend Diego's sister was playing basketball out there in the state tournament. And so we went to watch our game and it was cool. It was at the Pit where the Lobos play, where the New Mexico basketball team plays. And they won their game. They lost their second game. But you'll get them next year. That's the vibe. And, yeah, it was just great, bro. We went to a place to eat called Frontier. Oh, it was so good, bro. It was just so good. Hey, Patty. But they also. It's like, no matter who you talk to there, they're just like, yeah, have you tried the green chilies? They'll have a dude in a coma or whatever, and he'll finally, like, start to say something. They'll be like, he's. He's gonna talk and he'll be like, if you tried the green chilies, it's all anybody cares about, bro. You could be going to jail. And they'll be like, how do you plead? And they'll be like, I've tried the green chilies. It's just. There's something about it, bro. That's just their thing, bro. The green chilies over there. So. But that was. It was a blast just to get to go over there. We just went for the day, caught the game and. And came back home. What else is going on? Well, personally, I guess there's. Oh, we're gonna. We gotta. This episode we get. We're gonna talk to some busboys. We're gonna talk about the Bus Boys movie. The tickets. The tickets for the movie go on sale March 16, so. So that's gonna be wonderful. We got. We have some busboys that have just called in and left voicemails. We put a. An all call out for that. So that's what's popping. Um, have you tried the green chilies? It's fucking crazy over there, dog. You'll see a kid in the street just fucking throwing a drill. Just throwing a drill to his friend. It's. This is. It's a construction area, bro. The whole place. A lot of people there working construction. But the place looks like it could probably use a little bit of construction. So it's just a dichotomy over there, you know? But a lot of great people. We had a blast, man. And unique people, bro. Unique. I could see why they say a lot of times UFOs landed out there because they got some. They got people that's halfway to space out there. And Alba, they got some people that's halfway to space. Hey, Penny, have you tried the green chilies? Patty? Like, dude, she chills. She's just bringing out the recycling bin. She's shy. Yeah, we'll get into that in a second. What's going on, dude? With me. I gotta check in, man. It's been. It's like, I don't know. I don't want to get in, like, a complaining culture. Nobody wants to hear that. What's going on? I started a thing where I'm taking a break from dating and interacting with women. So that's been going pretty good. It's nice. I just wanted to just take a break from, like, I just wanted to have time to focus on myself and my higher and my relationship with my higher power. So just to try and get some Just things on track better. And, you know, I think, like, in the world, like, you're like a magnet, right? Everybody is like a magnet. I think that's just my thoughts and. And you attract certain things and your magnet gets attracted certain places. And sometimes it's a great spot, but sometimes you got to just check in on the magnet, make sure the magnets work and see what's going on with the magnet. So, yeah, that's what I wanted to do. Um, you know, because I've been attached to some good metals over the years here and there, some precious metals. But I think I just need to take some time just to kind of look at the magnet and just see what's going on. Yeah. And I just want to. Want to. Wanted to try and work on my relationship with my higher power. You know, I've just been. Recently, I've just been kind of. Sometimes, I don't know, like, I just hadn't really been praying that much recently. And I was talking to my therapist. Therapist about it yesterday. I couldn't figure out exactly why. I think, you know, sometimes. Sometimes I. Sometimes I don't want to do everything I'm supposed to do to take care of myself. And that may not make sense to some people or whatever, and that's fine. But it's like, yeah, sometimes I just. I don't want to do ever. Like, you know, I'll be doing, like, so many. Like, I'll be doing good things for myself, taking care of myself this way and this way and this way. And I know it's impossible for us to do everything, to take care of ourselves. We don't want to live, like, as, like, slaves to, like, you know, exactly what we're. You know, every article that comes out or everything we hear, you know, that kind of thing would be impossible for me, but. But yeah, sometimes I just don't want to do all the things I'm supposed to do to take care of myself. Sometimes I want to, like, well, I'm not doing that, or there's always one that I'll kind of leave out or I don't Know, I think. I can't understand. I can't explain exactly what I'm saying, but I'm trying. To. Yeah, I. I don't know. I just. Sometimes I don't want to do everything that I'm supposed to do to take care of myself. Does that make any sense to you, Trevin? It does, yeah. And you're saying, like, you're trying to now kind of check in and, like, recenter. Yeah. And I was just like, why am I not praying? Like, what am I again? Like, I'm not against praying, you know, I mean, I want a better relationship with my higher power. I think. I think, honestly, part of me scared if I do. If I do the things I'm supposed to do for myself, then I'm going to have to change. Yeah. That I'm going to have to not change in a bad way or anything, but just that things could be different, you know, And I won't have. I don't know. There's always a part of me that wants to be able to say, I'm not doing that. You know, I'm not doing. You know, I'm not doing that. No, I'm gonna do things my way, you know, So I don't know what it is, but. But that. That's been something. And so I was grateful today, like, even before this episode, I was just asking God for some help, you know, I was just saying I just feel kind of sometimes some. Sometimes exhausted. In some ways I feel like I can't figure out sometimes what I'm supposed to do. Just like, in the world, like, with work and stuff, I can. But, you know, it's just like, yeah, what does God want me to do? And maybe that's it. Maybe I'm just scared sometimes of asking the God that and try and get in, like, a real answer. Yeah, what does God want me to do? And then it's like, you know, and this sounds kind of. I don't know if it sounds lazy or what it sounds, but sometimes I get tired of being the one to always have to take care of myself, you know, I just. I get tired of being. It's like, oh, okay, here we go again. I gotta be. You know, I gotta come to Moan Rescue. And I know that those. That. Those are the. That that's the truth, but sometimes I just get kind of tired of it, you know? And I'm not trying to say anything like, I'm doing great, but that's just kind of some real ways that I'm feeling. I've been doing Good. About pornography and looking at pornos and, hey, Penny. And. And masturbation or jerking off or touching your cock, buddy. But then I've. I slipped up yesterday, so I think part of me has some negative feeling about that. You know, not negative, but just, like, you know, I think I get tired of getting, like, man, I'll get to, like, four or five days, you know, Sometimes I've gotten a long time. I've had months, and. But, you know, and then I'll just, like. I don't know. So it's all good. Just trying to be like, just say what's going on with me? And. Yeah. And, yeah, that's it. Sometimes you just. You jerk off because it's almost St. Patrick's Day, but that's not a good reason, dude. You can't be like, I'm jerking off because it's almost St. Patrick's Day. That's crazy, bro. That's crazy. Hey, Penny. So that's some of what's going on with me. But I'll say this. It has been nice taking a break from, like, dating and social interaction with women has been nice because it. There's been times where it's like, yeah, I have some more time to myself. I have some more time to think. Yeah. And it gives my brain a little bit more, like, space to be like, okay, hey, what's going on? You know, and to kind of check in with myself. So, yeah, I'm hopeful. I'm hopeful that. Yeah, just that I can work on the magnet, you know? So that's been happening. What else? You know, there's people message me a lot of times or will tell me, hey, why don't you talk about this thing? Or why don't you talk about Iran? Or Iran? Because people say it different. And a lot of people will ask me about, hey, Theo, will you talk about this or will you say something about this? This is going on a lot of different causes that are de. Dear to people's hearts and minds, and I understand that, and I wish there was. That I could talk about everything. Sometimes I don't know enough. Sometimes I don't. I'm. Sometimes I'm burnt out from absorbing, like. You know, you absorb so much horrible stuff that's out there that's happening, and it just, like, it ruins you. It ruins you. It's like. And there's algorithms that are set up, it feels like, to ruin you. So it's not that I don't care about certain things. It's just that I have to take care of Myself, I have to make sure that I'm living and surviving and make sure that my life is okay and that the people that I'm responsible for through work and family, that, you know, that I'm upholding my place in their lives, you know, So I think that's it. And not that anybody's asking me to answer about that, but I'm sure a lot of people deal with that where it's like, people like, why, why don't you speak about certain things? Or why don't, you know? And some of it's just, it's too much. Some of it's. It's too much. Some of it I don't know enough about it. So I try to. I try to speak up where I can. I try to speak up when I feel compelled, and sometimes I feel compelled and I don't know exactly what to say. I don't know enough information. So I want to have people on to learn more. And sometimes we have guests set up in advance. And so it's like certain guests aren't this space to have a certain conversation with people. So, yeah, I'm not beholden to anyone about anything like that, but I do want to say that. And yeah, I'm doing the best that I can. Maybe in time I'll be able to have more information about certain topics and do better. I can do better to learn, and I try my best. It's hard to know also what is clean information, and that's a scary thing. So, yeah, I'm not apologizing or anything. I just, I want to speak up about that, that I also have to take care of me and show up in the spaces that I'm supposed to show up as a human and also not to like, you know, I don't. It's tough when you attack when you, you know, it's just, it's at times it's a lot, and I'm sure a lot of people feel that way, that it's a lot. But I do see things and I do pray about things. It doesn't mean that I don't know about them, you know, and. Yeah, and that's where I'm at with that. You know, I have spoken about this before, but I do have a lot of uncomfort about America's relationship with Israel, the Israeli political leaders. That's what I mean. I just, I believe that that group is. It is. It just feels like a satanic regime. It doesn't seem like. It feels like they just want to cause pain. They just, I Mean, the, you know, these. They don't even know where all the bodies from Gaza are, and they're already moved on to other places that they are attacking and that America is associated now with their attacks. And I believe that that will come here one day. I don't believe that the Israeli leaders, that they have any intention to stop that. I don't see that they have any care for the American people. It doesn't seem like that. I've never heard that spoken. And I believe that if we don't speak up now, that our children won't have the chance to speak up, either by law or by worse. And that may sound crazy to some people, and that's fine. If it does. If it does sound crazy to you and you think I'm crazy on that point of view, that's okay. I don't. You know, I may disagree with you, but that's okay. You know, I do want to. You know, I worked hard to be able to have a voice for myself. And. And so I hope at least you disrespect that or I hope at least you just see that. Like, at least I'm trying to say what I want to say. And I don't understand our government's relationship with Israel's leaders and with Israel's government. I don't understand it. You know, I just. It feels like there's this war machine and. And then our soldiers and are put into these spaces, and they're just there to serve an America that they believe in, and it's no knock against them or anything like that. It's just. I just don't. It just feels like it's causing a lot of pain and fear. And. Yeah, I don't understand our. I don't understand Trump's relationship. I don't understand our political, like, why we are so beholden to these, to this government, this Israeli government that. That just seems to be obsessed with control, and it feels like, like bloodlust. Like they just, like it's not enough. Like, after what happened in Gaza, I don't see. To me, I don't. I don't see how there could be any other view, but if someone else has a different one, that's okay. That's their point of view. I'm just happy to be able to speak up for myself even if I'm wrong. Even if I'm wrong. There's a part of me that, even though I feel scared sometimes, that I'm happy to be able to speak up for myself and say that, you know, because It's. I've. Yeah, having a voice has always been important to me, and I'm sure it is to a lot of people. And they're making laws now. There are bills being presented where we won't even have a chance to have a voice at some point. There's surveillance infrastructure that's being put into place. There's a lot of things happening right now, and some people are like, well, it's too much for me to get involved in. I understand that. I understand that. But, yeah, I believe that if we don't speak up now, and it may already be too late, but if we don't speak up now, that one day our kids will not be able to. And it's disappointing to me, too, that a lot of our religious leaders haven't said anything. I don't understand it. I don't understand that. But there's a lot of stuff I don't understand, you know, And I think this has been going on for a long time. I. I do not understand Trump's, like, infatuation with or like, beholding to this government. But they've had, you know, Israeli government's been involved in America for a long time throughout countless political party leaders. So it's nothing new. It just feels very extreme right now, and it feels very scary. That's what it feels like. And I don't understand how our relationship with them is helping America, but that's just me. That's just my thoughts. All right, let's move on. I just had to say that. Sorry. I know some people's like, dude, it's too political, whatever, but that's. I have to speak up for myself. You know, I'm saying I've worked hard in my life to have a place for a voice, and you may not even ever want to hear my voice again. That's okay. But I have to speak up for myself even if I'm wrong. And it's just a lot. That's a lot of fear I see of just every day, people around me, like, what's going on here? People from different parties, too, that, like this candidate or like this candidate, what the. Is going. I have no idea. I have no idea. But it sound. It seems super scary. That's the feeling scary. You know, the. The industrial war complex. Just like everything, you know, the fact that we know that our foods are poisoning us just all. We know that the health care that when after your food poisons you, you go to get. Hell, you go to get health care, and you get screwed there. It's Just. It's fun. It's crazy. It's crazy. And then we get sedate. You start looking at a married dude. You get. People get sedate. It's like, as long as I have my vape and I'm able to watch, like, some kids do the stanky leg video or something. It's like. Then I put. You know, it's like we've just, like, slowly gotten sedated. It's pretty wild. And I. Who knows what will happen, but went from, like, kind of seemed like, kind of mundane in the world to high speed, it feels like. But then you. You can't get so wrapped up in it that that's all you're thinking about and all you're talking about either, because then that is giving. That's like. That's what they want, you know, they don't want us to live. You know, they don't want us to live. They want us to be alive, but they don't want us to live. But anyway, I know that all. All that stuff is a lot, but that's just. That's been on my mind. Hey, Patty, do you try the green chilies, bro? I tried them. I freaking. Dude, I was there. You're there. You're in Albuquerque for 11 minutes, and some guy's coming up. He's got illegal green chilies. He's like, bro, these aren't even supposed to be here. It's just like, dude, I've tried the green chilies. I've tried them, and they're great. They're great. And we went to a place called L. Can you look it up, Trevin? It's by. It's kind of by the airport, I think. El Modelo. Look it up. Is it that one? Yeah, bro. El Modelo. And it wasn't beer. I thought I'd go in. It was just people swimming in a bunch of, like, Modelo beer or whatever. Some guy doing the backstroke, you know. Oh, put some drywall on here. I'm drowning. But it was just like, the sweetest ladies working in there. I mean, the best, bro. And it was just good, bro. It just felt like. Dang. It felt like when you walked in there, it felt like your grandmother loved you right when you walked in, homie. Even the gang bangers, they were taking off their face tattoos before they walked in, bro. There was, like, a lot of respectado for El Modelo, but it was. Yeah, I had a good time over there. And shout out to my friend Abby Pavia. She's a great basketball player, and she's got a big heart, and it was great. It was great to watch her team. Her team play. Now let's get into it, dog. Dude. St. Patrick's Day. Have you tried the green beer? Damn. St. Patrick was a slave, bro. Did we say that, Trevin? I don't think so. It says right here. Let me see. At about age 16, St. Patrick was captured by Irish raiders and taken to Ireland as a slave, where he herded animals for around six years before escaping back to his family. Dang, bro. And then he went back to Ireland. Said, I'm going to change the game, dude. That's wild. Have you tried the Catholicism? That's what he was doing over there. St. Patrick spent years traveling through parts of Ireland preaching, baptizing. Baptizing.
Jason V
Bro.
Theo Von
Dog. Don't stay under too long, homie. You'll be late for work. Founding churches and monasteries and ordaining clergy. Dang. He was out there in the streets pushing something that meant something to him. His own surviving writings are the confessio condemning violence against Irish Christians. Amen. Okay, I want to talk about bus boys. And we got some callers. We had bus boys that called in. And I'm a tap into my. You know. You know, I'm saying I was a busboy for probably 7 years. I bus boyed a couple of places. Couple times. I worked with a couple sisters one time over there at the first Mexican restaurant in our area. And these two girls named April and May, they were the chefs. And they were. Anytime you came back to get food or whatever, they got furious at you because they was doing some other shit or whatever, smoking or whatever, and. And so, yeah, you'd have to go out to the tables and shit. Was late and shit like that, and people left or whatever. Anyway, they invited me to their house one day to party. Asked me to bring some beer. I drank. I brought some beer over there and. And a dog bit me. And everybody there drank all my beer. And I fucking had to leave early. But what else I had. I worked at Tucson, Arizona. I was a bus boy down there. I was one of the first busboys to use creatine ever in the history of bus busing. I was probably. I think I was one of the top seven busboys south of Phoenix probably for a little while. And I say that with my whole whole chest. I say that shit pure as day. I was out there, boy. I was out there. I was on the tables. Bread on 6, butter on 11. Cleanup. I'm 43. Shit diaper. Some kid, they had a shit diaper. Over there, some kid, they brought him in there. I don't even think they ate. They just brought the kid in there to. In his diaper and somebody. I wrapped a towel around that and sent him out. But I was doing it, bro. I was on the front lines of food use and dishware, dirty dishware. I was on the front lines of that shit. So I know the trenches. I know what it's like to go back there and have to look at the dishwasher. And you bring one more tub and you love that because he's in the heat, bro. The steam coming off that, the water hose spigot thing, he's blasting, bro, that got shit hanging off his eyebrows and shit. He got pieces of fucking damp tortilla hanging out of his eyelashes. And that bitch is still back there blasting them bitches, getting the platos limpio, you know what I'm saying? And he don't want to. And you can't even look him in the eye when you drop off that last bus tub. Damn, bro, that's the pain of a real bus boy. Somebody who's got the tables and the trays and the tubs and the plates in their heart. When you. When you know, bro, like, I can't bring this to my dog one more time. And sometime I tab him out, I say, man, like, we a tag team, bro. You know, it's like the world Wash. Like the World Washing Federation, bro, the wwf. Let me limpio a tub for you, daddy. Get out there and get you a cigarette. And then somehow he'd have a little pocket of camarones or something on them shrimps, and he'd get out there and eat them bitches by himself just to rebuild his conscience and stuff so he could get back. I mean, that's a dude. That's a Vietnam right there for some people. So shout out to all the dishwashers too, man. And that last tub, sorry we brought it in there, bro. We know how it felt, but we all had to get the job done. So I want to say that. But we had some calls from busers that have been in the game over the years. People called in. We got to go to a couple calls of those. But first I do want to talk about. About the. About the movie. I just want to tell you straight up that Bus Boys, the movie will come out on April 17, so that's when you'll be able to go to see it. But tickets are going to go on sale March 16th. So, yeah, I guess, like, you know, first of all, I got to do this movie with David Spade. And I say this movie, like, trust me, there's a big part of me that's just. I cannot even believe that we did this, right? And we did this ourselves, right? That's what I want to say. You know, I went to Hollywood and. And you go pitch TV shows and you do all these. All these meetings, you're always waiting to hear back. You're always in this cycle of bullshit, you know, and it's always somebody that was nothing like me deciding if they thought I had the ability or the talent or the capability or if my voice should be heard, right? It was always the. You know, it's the same type of people over and over again. Some schmuck who had never fucking done a day, a moment of comedy in his life, some business, fuck, whatever, you know, you go to all these things and. And it's. For me, it was a waste of time. For some people, it's great. It's. It's their stairway to their dreams or to different opportunities and stuff like that. And I had a great time. Like, I met a lot of great people, and I got to develop my standup, which was the best thing, because standup was the thing that I liked the most, because nobody could give that to their kid. You know, you go audition for some role and then some. Some producer's kid gets it or somebody's son or some bull, you know, but stand up, they can't do that. Stand up is you. They can. Nobody could give that shit. Look, I'm gonna get my son the opportunity. Fuck your son. You know what I'm saying? He's got. You can't withstand him. You can't. You got to get up there and do your job. Now, some people may not like my stand up, may not think I'm any good at it. That's fine with me. But you have to get up there and do your job. Nobody. It's a. It's a thin line. And that's one thing I always want. I always wanted my voice. I don't want to do your. I don't want to do your. I don't want to go play some role where you have me playing this stupid redneck. And it's just like. Because you don't even understand that maybe people where I'm from are diverse of thought and are more intricate and aren't just racist people. You know, I wanted more that I like. I just. I don't know. I thought their system was outdated, to be honest with you. And though they, you know, there's always these articles. Hollywood, it's accepting everybody that it's not. It's not. And I'll say that firsthand. So I. I just want you to know where some of my energy was coming from and why. Eventually, I started to. To do podcasting because I just wanted to have my own voice. I don't want to read your lines. I don't even believe. I'd have meetings with people, and I would tell them about my life or about how I see things, and they would say that it wouldn't fit this narrative. It would all. You know, it wouldn't fit this narrative. And so I got tired of waiting for them, and. Yeah. And then. So when I got into podcasting, it was a place where we could have our own voice. And I think some of this movie just kind of followed suit. You know, I became friends with David Spade through Adam Eget, who worked at the Comedy Store, and. And it was great. You know, I still remember the first time that I went to dinner. I met David at the comedy club a few times, and then we went to dinner one time, and he gave me a Joe Dirt hat. Dude. And it was the best, because I remember seeing Joe Dirt when I was younger, and it was just like. I didn't know it was. I thought it was a documentary, you know, because our TV was fucked up, and so some of the audio was different, and. And I thought it was a documentary about this kid who had gotten left at the Grand Canyon by his parents. And. And it gave me just such like, an affection for this, for him, you know, just like. Yeah, because I think I felt like that as a kid. Anyway, I felt like I got left at the Grand Canyon, even though I was right there, a bedroom over from my mother, you know, just like, you know how I felt, it matched with how I felt. But anyway, a lot of. That's a lot of emo. But so David and I became friends, and. And he. He. He's been a great friend. You know, he's got a big heart. He's welcomed me into circles. He's taking me with him to, like, fancy parties where they have fancy silverware and there's, you know, people are stealing shit from the place. Like, that's how nice the shit is there. Like, I've been to a lot of places where nobody's stealing shit because people are like, oh, this shit's trash. I already got this shit at home. I ain't stealing more just shit. But I've been to places where they got really nice shit with Him. I met Jon Hamm. With him. I met Jon Hamm. Yeah. Just. So. Anyway, just getting to know him was a blessing. And then we started. Was during COVID We started writing a movie together. And David, even this. I'll say this. He. You know, I ran out of gas one time, and he brought me gas, and he almost got hit by a damn Kia Sophia. I mean, so close to hitting him and killing. I don't know if it would have killed him. I don't know. He's not the biggest guy, but he could have challenged it. But I don't. I don't know. But he brought that shit out, ran across the interstate and shit, bringing me fucking gas. So, I mean, just nice shit, man. And so we started writing this movie because we. And one thing that we found that we had in common was that we both worked as busboys in Arizona. I worked in Arizona under. They had this guy, Sam Fox. He's a restaurateur. He's a friend of mine. He had. This was his first restaurant, and I worked there as a busboy, and David had worked as a busboy over there in Phoenix. And so we had this relationship. A busing in the desert, man. Even when there's water shortages and shit like that, bro. Imagine you got to clean up 20 tables and you ain't got no water cut. Who are you now? Who are you now? I was still a busboy, so I stayed in that shit, man. I stayed in that shit. That was our Iwo Jima cut. And so that's where I was, man. And so we kind of bonded on that type of shit. And then we started writing this movie. Yeah. And nobody really wanted to help, you know, and that's fine. I'm not complaining. I'm just saying what it was. Right. I wanted to let you know where we were at mentally, what was going on with us in our brains and stuff. Nobody really wanted help. We couldn't. We reached out to some directors that we liked. They didn't want to deal with it. Our agencies didn't really help. You know, there was some email and back and forth and some light shit, but nothing really. Like, we're going to take these guys and we're going to believe in them. You know, we're going to really take these guys and do something. There wasn't any of that. And I say that. That's true. And so we got to a spot where it was like, damn, we got to make this, or just go by our ways. And we'd spent a lot of time together and made it and written it so far and all of that. And so we just put up our own money, you know, we put up our own money and. And then next thing you know, dude, we were making a real movie. And this is crazy. I didn't think it was real until I showed up that day on set to shoot because it had just all been emails, it had been David and I writing and we would go meet at his place and sometimes we would get Jimmy John's and sometimes we wouldn't, which I didn't understand. But. But I would get it on the way home or whatever sometimes. But, but yeah, we, you know, we, we made this. But we, we. We realized that we had to pay for it, right? We have to fund. We. So we put our money in and I didn't realize until the day that we got to set this set. I call it look, though I'm not locked in on all the terminology and so I call it that. I know it sounds highfalutin or whatever, but until we got to the movie site the first day and there was like trailers. There was like a woman with makeup or whatever, hair conditioner or whatever, you know. Hey Patty, have you tried the green chili? Yes, I have. And, and we, and we were making a movie and it was crazy that other actors were there that we'd. Look, you know, we did all of this stuff and so that's what's, that's what we're making, right? That's what we put together and we did it. We created a movie, you know, and we made something. And it was crazy because you get to the end and I was like, what did we do? Dude? I was so scared. And then you go through the editing and you do all this shit and you start to realize, okay, this is how it is. And so that's what's coming out is our movie that we made completely by ourselves that these people said no to. I don't care. Fuck em. You said no to me your whole life, cuz. You know what I'm saying? I'm glad you're not on board now. So that's where we're at. And I think it's good, man. There's some funny spots in was a huge learning curve. I'm not saying it's the greatest movie. I mean it's like a three million dollar budget or something. And yeah, I learned a ton. Like if I could go back and do. There's a lot of things I would probably adjust. Like, I just learned a lot. I learned a lot, man. About how it would operate, just all these different things. So that was a blessing. It was the most expensive course of education I've ever learned in my life. But if you go see this movie, I just want you to know that that's what it is, right? It's something that we made. We made it outside of the system. And thank you, David, for you. Let me do this with you. There's some scenes in there, dude, that David does that are so good. And this comment, it's just like, Tim Dillon's in it. Nate Diaz, Chris Avila, Jay Pharaoh, Trevor Wallace, Jimmy Gonzalez, Michelle Ortiz, Lindsey Normington, Thiago Martinez. Have you tried the green chili Tiago? Steve Little Sky Bree, Brent Morin. There's a lot. There's. There's a lot I'm missing a ton of wonderful folks. So. So, yeah, All I'm saying is that's what this is. This is a movie that we made that is outside of the system. And we want you to go see it to support this type of. Of thing. Because we can do more in the future and we can do it better, and we can help fund movies that other people want to make that. That the gatekeepers don't see, you know, and that's fine. I don't need the gate, you know, I don't even want to go through the gate. I'm coming up through the dirt, son. I'm through the mud, dog. You keep that latch, dog. I'll be in the yard. And that's how I've always been. And so that's where I'm at. That's where we're at with this. Yeah. So. So thank you. If you go to see it, it's not like. What's that movie, Dunkirk or whatever? It's not like that. Okay? So don't think it's like that. It's different. It's not like Sarah Marshall. It's not that, Right? This a movie about two dudes trying to be alive, trying to become waiters. That's what it's about. With some love stories in there and some other type shit, but you feel me? But it's got that bus boy mentality in it. You know, I'll be a waiter or I'll get my some other way, but we eat. Even if I work at the restaurant, we eat. So that's the movie. It's going to be out. I can't believe it. It's kind of scary, too, because if nobody goes and sees you, like, oh, all right. But that's okay too, right? I mean, It'll bum me out, but that is okay. You know, I'm proud of, like, what we've done. I'm proud that we did something. You know, I feel lucky. I got to do something with David Spade, man. Like, you know, I don't even deserve that kind of stuff. And I don't mean that in a negative way about myself, but, yeah, he's just such an immense talent and to be able to just be around him and spend time and the fact that we ended up down this road together and here we are, it's been a blessing. And yeah, I can't even. But like, it's weird to say, like, yeah, I'm in a movie. I mean, anybody could be in a movie. I mean, you know, I'm saying Kim Kardashian was in a short one with some in it, so anybody could be in a film. But. But yeah, that we made this and that our friends showed up to help us make this, man, you know? Yeah. And just the actors and actresses in it. But I think. I know there's some funny parts in it. I know you'll laugh. I'm curious. I think I'm just super curious, like, what is okay to do in a movie? What is. You know, what could we do different? I mean, dude, we got. The first day we started shooting, got moved by a week at the last minute, like two days before. We got moved by a week because of the fires that were out in California that were like a year and a half ago or whatever. Oh, whenever. The Pasadena fires and the Palisades fires. So that was cr. I mean, just. There was so many things that were like, is this gonna happen? But it happened. And. Yeah, so, yeah, there's some. Yeah, like, there's just. It's just like, I hope you'll find some joy in it. It's a fun. It's light hearted, it's goofy, it's dumb, it's fun. And yeah, it's a dream come true to be able to do it. And I promise you that if this one goes well, we will find other things to make if I'm not. If I don't do good and it's. I'm not the one to be in the other things, that's fine. But we'll create other projects that are funny that people want to see, you know, because that's really what needs to happen, you know, at least to respect other people's point of view of comedy, you know? You know, and to just. To care, like, just, you know, I don't even I don't even know if. I mean voices that aren't out there, but it's just like, you know, there's. That's different. And. Yeah, I just. I promise that we'll make other cool stuff whether we're in it or not, but we'll write it or we'll do something, you know? So, yeah, that's where I'm at, you know, so let's get this thing out there, bro. But just one more time. Tickets will be on sale Monday, March 16th. You can buy them@busboys movie.com. so you'll be able to get those busboys movie.com. if they don't have it in your area, that's okay. It'll notice what area has been looked up. And then as soon as these First, I think 100 theaters fill up or something, if we can sell those, then it's going to let us sell more. So it's an experiment, you know, it's an experiment.
Busboy Callers
It's.
Theo Von
And I appreciate you guys patience. It's. I've spent so many hours editing, going through, watching, you know, there's so many choices that you are a part of in. In this, and I learned a ton. And. Yeah. And just. Yeah. Thank you so much. I can't even believe it. It's just crazy to even get to do it. Whether people hate it or love it, I don't give a shit what the critics think. Them. The critics don't know shit. You know, the critics don't know shit. Remember that? The critics don't know shit. The critic is some schmuck who's sitting over there who never did shit. That's the critic. That's the critic. Some guy with a pen and a fucking. He probably didn't even have a dip in. He probably didn't even have a zen in a cheek. In his cheek to fuck him. The critic don't know shit. I hope the critics hate this shit. Fuck them. I'll cr. Look, I'm a critic now. Hey, critics, y' all fucking suck there. Boom. I just did your whole job in fucking four seconds. All right, now let's get to some calls from some bus boys. Some players that been in the game, boy, you know what I'm talking about? Let's go, bro. And look, I want other busboys to call in. Some of these are good. And so I want some other bus boys to call in, too, and hit the hotline. I like to throw these in from time to time just to respect the culture and keep it going. The hotline, as always, is 985-664-9503. Or you can go to the website theovon.com. there's a place you can leave. Send a video on there as well. If you want to send a video version of you and we can put that in the show. So those are the two ways where you can get in touch and communicate as well. If something's going on in your life and is big or small, or if you just want to say something or if you're scared about something, you want to get it off your chest, if there's something that you feel like me bringing up on here could be of help or service. I'm going to try to do a better job of doing more solo episodes. It's been hard for me for some reason. This is, this, this doing solos, it takes a lot of stress. It creates a lot of stress in me. I don't know what it is. It could just be what's going on right now and just the busyness of life. I don't know. It used to be a little easier for me, you know. Have you tried to bring Healy? But it's just gotten tougher over the years and so. But maybe that will change. But yeah, I do want to be able to continue to have just more of a personal relationship and maybe that's something I need to pray about and can pray about. So anyway, love you guys. The hotline, 985-664-9503. Let's get to some calls.
Busboy Callers
Hey, Theo, this is Jacob from Cincinnati area.
Theo Von
What's up, Jacob? Nice to hear from you. Sorry, you guys just lost Trey Hendrickson there. I saw that, but blessings. Onward, baby.
Busboy Callers
I saw your Instagram story talking about bus boys. So I used to be a busboy back in high school.
Theo Von
Thank you for your service, brother.
Busboy Callers
My sophomore in my junior year at a pretty high end restaurant. And I think the craziest thing that happened to me there, well, I saw some tits once, but that's not.
Theo Von
I mean, that's normal shit, bro. That's street shit. You could see a tit anywhere, bro. Close your eyes, Open them. Bitches might see one. Onward.
Busboy Callers
I don't know, man. I'm more of a butt guy myself.
Theo Von
But bro, a butt is just a big tits on the back, bro. With no nipples, with no milk in them. That's all a bud is. Let's hear it.
Busboy Callers
I. This one day I was working. I agreed at this table and this lady was mad. She's like, can I have a lobster bisque? I said, yeah, let me Grab my waitress real quick. And she started ripping my ass. She's like, you don't need to go tell her this and tell her that. Just go get me the lobster bisque. And I was like, all right. Well, you know, some time goes by, she gets up to go to the restroom. So I go over there to check on the. On the brother, and he says, hey, man, how old are you? I said, I'm 16, sir. He's like, oh, never mind. Said, well, why do you ask? He said, oh, my. My wife loves redheads. I forgot to mention I'm a gentleman, but I'm assuming that he wanted me to have sex with his wife in front of him. And, you know, I don't think I would have done it maybe for the right price and. But yeah, anyways, Theo, I love you, man.
Theo Von
Love you too, brother. Praise God. And he almost got. He almost got a sex trafficked or whatever there by an urban couple. And you know, that's the kind of that's happening, bro. When you had high end, anything could happen, bro. You might get sex trafficked or whatever. When you had a low end place where if you had a, you know, if you working at a subway or something like that, or more of like a lower tier fast, you know, you lucky. You're lucky if somebody tries to touch your ass or whatever or something, or somebody tries to put their hand in your pants real fast and pull it out and get a quick sniff of your egg, boy. But if you had a high end place, you might actually get traffic, you know, not some fucking hand sniffing dick monkey over there trying to rub on you or whatever. But what I'm saying is this, dude, yeah, they wanted that ginger boy, they wanted that fucking little firework, you feel me? They wanted that fucking spicy candle. But that's okay, bro. That's the kind of shit when you work, high end shit, you at least get job opportunities, bro. I always tell my friends, if you working in a high end place, you might get a job opportunity, bro. Hey, bro, thanks for your service, bro. Type shit. We out, boy. Blm, dude. GLM too, kind of. All right, let's hear this.
Busboy Callers
Hey, what's up? Theo Love from New Jersey, this is Charlie. I was a busboy at my brother's steakhouse. And the best part about being a busboy is you can be fed. You got a lot of food in the back there, so you can snag on the food. And, you know, being a busboy might not be the best job, but be the best bus boy you can be.
Theo Von
Bro, what are you, Richard Nixon or something? Dude, we're just trying to freaking clean up the tables, twin. You feel me, dog? But I got you. But I don't. You don't always get food in the bag. Dude, I worked at this one place, and they would. They would have soup, but we could only eat it when it was really hot, bro. If the got too kind of cooled off, the dude wouldn't let us eat it. So he liked watching kids eat that hot soup or whatever. That guy was a per. Maybe a pedia file or whatever. But. But we didn't know him that good. We was employees, you know? But yeah, but yeah, I feel you do. You worked at your brother's steakhouse and you got fed, bro. It sound like you was just over there hanging out, boy. That's gentrification, bro. All right, let's take another call here.
Busboy Callers
Hey, Theo. This is Ryan. So I used to bus tables at this seafood place, and there's this old guy who came in all the time. We're talking in late 70s, quiet, always sat at the same two top by the window. Every single visit, he ordered the same thing. A dozen raw oysters and iced tea. Now, if you've ever been a busboy, you know the rule. Nobody says out loud. You know, if a table leaves and there's food that looks untouched, you know it's fair game.
Theo Von
Yeah, you can have a little.
Busboy Callers
So the guy finishes up, pays leaves, and goes over in. You know, I go over to clear the table, and there's still a couple oysters there still sitting in the shells, and they look perfect.
Theo Von
Oh, bro, them bitches don't look perfect, bro. Going near somebody else's oysters, dude, that's crazy, bro. Let's hear it.
Busboy Callers
Lemon wedge cocktail sauce. The whole setup, honestly, look like he barely touched them.
Theo Von
Oh, bro, dog, I don't care if somebody even just a little bit touched an oyster, bro. I ain't even showing up at that thing. Now. A scallop, Bro, scallop is just a big gay oyster, bro. It's just basically like a bear in the gay community or whatever, but amongst shellfish. Let's hear more scallops. They suck.
Busboy Callers
And I'm hungry. I've been running around for, like, six hours. So I look around the dining room real quick. Nobody's paying attention. I grab one the oysters, hit it with little lemon, and just slurp it right down there while I'm here on the plates. A couple minutes later, I'm back in the kitchen, and one of the servers Goes, hey, did you clear that old guy's oysters table? I'm like, yeah. And she goes, did he do his weird thing again? Now I'm already nervous, and I'm like, what weird thing? And she goes, oh, he doesn't actually eat them. He just sucks on them for the flavor and spits them back in the shell, man. When I tell you, the entire kitchen turn and look at me, because by that point, the oyster was long gone. The dishwasher just starts laughing, goes, bro, you ate a secondhand oyster. And the whole. The worst part about it was just everybody knew this guy did that. Like, it was just a known thing about him. Nobody told the new bus. No, but nobody told me this. So that's the day I learned important restaurant rule. If a food still sitting at customer's plate, there's. There's probably a reason, bruh.
Theo Von
Don't. You can't be eating nobody's oyster like that, bruh. Dang, bruh, I can't even imagine that. Oh, it makes my fucking lungs hurt right now hearing you say that, you bastard. Why would you do that? Why would you do that? Why would you do that? I just. I just don't understand, Dan, why you would do that? God, I. Oh. Oh, bro. That's bad, dog. My buddy used to be like that, boy. My boy Josh, we used to work over there, more than seafood over there on a chafunk, the river down there in Louisiana, Madisonville. And we were bus boys back there and shit. And we was always, like, trying to finish off a little bit of food at that. And sometimes the shrimps, I didn't notice the shrimps, if they eat. If somebody eats a peeled shrimp, sometimes a little bit gets hit, Gets kind of kept down by the tail over there. And he would peel off that last little outside part and just get that last bit of snack off that thing. Boy, he was like that, though. He was like that, bro. He was a real. He got his ged. Let's hear another call on it.
Busboy Callers
Yo, Theo, this is Jackson. I got a crazy story story for you. I was a busboy at. I mean, the worst Denny's you could possibly imagine.
Theo Von
Oh, which one was it? Every single one. Let's hear more.
Busboy Callers
I'm talking, like, just people throwing stuff everywhere. It was a mess.
Theo Von
We know who you're talking about when you say people as well, but let's hear more.
Busboy Callers
But this one time, this whole group, people, 15 people came in. They seemed nice. They seemed real nice. Apparently it was a graduation, and one of the boys just Graduated. And the rest of the guys were very happy. They decided they were going to order the all you can eat pancakes, just one of them. And I had to explain to 15, 17 year olds, you can't buy just one all you can eat pancakes. You gotta buy 15 all you can eat pancakes. Let's just say they beat my ass and I had to give them all you can eat pancakes.
Theo Von
I don't even believe that story, they beat your ass at a Denny's. But first of all, that might be true. Nobody would even notice. But you just gave them all you can eat pancakes. I don't even believe that. Thank you for the call. Do you believe that, Trevin? I mean, shit happens at Denny's, brother. They beat his ass. And then he's continued to work for the day, tears in his eyes. I don't know. I appreciate the call, Jackson. I just do not believe it. Is it wrong for me to say that, Trevin? No. I mean, it's a fair assumption, okay? And I'm sorry you got hurt, if you did get hurt, but I don't think you did all right.
Ethan Anderson
Theo, my brother, I used to be a busboy slash kind of bar back for this steakhouse in Nashville. And I worked there for like, I don't know, a year and a half. And basically I would just kind of pick up dishes from the table sometimes and, you know, cut fruit for the bartenders stuff. But I would, you know, I would clock in at like 3:30 in the afternoon and I would leave at like 10:30 at night. And I may be worked. I mean, I maybe did two hours of work while I was there. And so after about a year and a half of working there, the manager pulls me into the office one day and he goes, hey, man, we're going to eliminate your position. We don't really think that we need a bar back.
Theo Von
And
Ethan Anderson
I said, you don't? I wasn't even mad. I was like, yeah, I'm. I was like, I've been working here for a year and a half and I don't really know what I do, to be totally honest with you.
Theo Von
And.
Ethan Anderson
And I've always imagined that that's what it would be like to work for the federal government. So, yeah, that was my experience.
Theo Von
Amen, man. That's from a guy, Ethan Anderson. Thank you, bro. Yeah, that's a dude. I agree. I mean, they just voted to let pet like perverts keep spending money out of a slush fund or whatever. The government, our government has sold us up the river, brother. So I'M just glad that you had a job, even for a little bit. That'll be at one day. We'll be in a museum. Even if you had a job just for a week or something and be like, oh, tell us about what it was. Like, there'll be three people left. That's great, man. That's great stuff, bro. I said you. You don't. All right, let's see what else we got here. There's a great one, too, that I'm gonna. I'm gonna play after this.
Busboy Callers
I. I've been a bus boy on and off for a while. Currently on type shit.
Theo Von
Big Dog. Stay in the game, bro. Stay in the fricking game, dude. Just wear knee braces or whatever if things are getting bad. Stay in the game.
Busboy Callers
But the wildest story I had was probably I was working at PF Changs and I found someone's panties under the table, and I had to get to the back of the kitchen, but. Yep, thank you.
Theo Von
You had to give them to the back of the kitchen for what? Huh? What do they want them? Some. Some purr back there huffing on them, boy. Oh, been there, daddy. We've all been there, huh? To be young. Hey, have you tried the green chilies? All right, let's get one more here. Yeah, dude, the things you'd find under the table, bro. I found a molar under one table one time. We had a dude left his ashes, Buddy's ashes or whatever from a thing, a few fire, death, burning thing or whatever. Funerals. Trying to think, yeah, panties or whatever, bro. And if that's at PF Changs, you was at that shit's popping, though. PF Changs was nice, though. At a certain time, bro. That was nice. All right, let's get one more here. I love this one. I think we'll probably finish on this one for now. We'll see. And we might do some more next week. Next time we do a solo. I like this. I like kind of seeing what kind of people were doing what. Bus boys. Tell me about it. Bus girls. Who was out there when, now? We didn't have a lot of bus girls, bro. The bus boys had to try to. Try to flirt with the hostesses, but we were kind of too low class for them. So really, the waiters got the hostesses really to date them. So bus boys was always out. That was the thing about being bus boys. You were always on your own, bro. You always this outsider group. You weren't really the kitchen. They didn't respect you to cook. They Respected you to carry the food from the cook to the table. That was it. They respected you to have the food for about seven or eight seconds, that's as much respect as they gave you when you was a bus boy. They didn't respect you to cook it. They didn't respect none of that shit. They didn't respect you. They. They said for seven seconds you could carry this over there. That's how amount of respect they have for you. Onward. Here's a call right here. This from Jason V. Kai the.
Jason V
I used to be a busboy at a couple different restaurants. The first restaurant was the Burger Bar in Stockbridge, Michigan. It was owned by my Uncle Danny, who was a Vietnam War veteran. He loved Asian women. He used to tell me, growing up, all the time he's like, get you an Oriental woman, Jason. They cook, they clean, they don't talk back. He owned the Burger Bar and I worked with him. And the manager of the Burger Bar was my mom. So I worked with my mom. Uncle Danny was the owner and my mom was the manager. And my mom had a relationship with her first cousin Steve, that was the son of my Uncle Danny. And Steve was in the Outlaws Motorcycle Club. His road name was Pushrod. And I eventually got out of that environment and I grew up and I got my own car and I became a busboy at the Ground Round in Jackson, Michigan. I worked a few days a week there and I worked on kids night, which was Tuesday night. And they used to have this clown come in and this clown was named Planko. Planko was in his late 40s or 50s or some, and he was named after that Price is Right game because he and his mom were like really close and she died of cancer or some. And he just called himself Plinko the Clown. Plinko didn't have a driver's license. I don't know if Plinko was ever legal to drive in the state of Michigan. And I used to have to pick him up for work. My boss would give me like an extra $20 if I would pick up Plinko and I formed a relationship with him. He would buy me booze all the time, let me smoke cigarettes, and I would pick him up and he put his clown makeup on as we were driving to the Ground Round. And he would basically. I don't think they. I don't think the Ground Round paid Planko. I think they paid him in alcohol because he would just get hammered and he would make these kids like these up balloon animals, like, not even balloon animals, like Balloon items. Like he had, like a hatchet he would make and like a balloon machine gun. And he would just be sitting in the back as I was busting tables and he would be drinking and he would be like, I hate kids. And I gave Plinko a ride home. And after I quit the ground round, Plinko actually hooked me up with this dude that he was friends with and his name was Detroit Rick. And we used to sell cable, the scramblers out of the back of Detroit Rick.
Theo Von
Oh, yeah. Cable to scramblers. Dude, that was hype. Big industry onward Van.
Jason V
It was like a cash only thing. I made a lot of money. Then after that, I joined the Army National Guard and I became a recruiter for the National Guard. I hope this information helps. Thank you for your service.
Theo Von
Thank you for your service, Jason V. That's. Dude, that is. Thank you, bro. Thank you. I was losing hope in humanity and in myself, and you just restored it with a good story. I appreciate that. Sometimes that's all we need, you know? Yeah. Thank you, bro. That is. Thank you for your service, Jason V. And for your service as a. As an Army National Guardsman. That's it. That's it for today. Happy St. Patrick's Day. You know, Try the green chilies. Try them on St. Patty's Day. Try them for St. Patty's make. Put them in your St. Patty's food. That's a green additive. What else? That's about it, you know, Hang in there. We'll keep our heads up. We keep doing our best. We live to fight another day. Busboys, movie dot com. That's where you can go get a ticket if you like. Busboys, movie dot com. Yeah. Anyway, God bless you guys. Be good to yourselves because you deserve it, you know? You do. We have to be good to ourselves and. And one day at a time, you know, One day at a time. Whatever's going on, if something's tough in your life, you don't have to. You don't. Don't think I have to deal for this my whole life, or I can't do this my whole life, or I can't do that, or this just. All you. All you just. Can I do this today? That's been helping me recently. Can I do this today? Can I get through this today? But yeah. Thank you guys for paying attention and I appreciate the support and. Gang, Gang. Have you tried the green chilies? Hey, buddy. Now I'm just floating on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be cornerstone oh, but when I reach that ground I'll share this peace of mind I found I can feel it in my bones. But it's gonna take. Monster Energy. Everybody knows White Monster Zero Ultra, that's the OG it kicked off this whole 00 sugar energy drink thing. But Ultra is a whole lineup now. You've got Strawberry Dreams, Blue Hawaiian Sunrise and Vice Guava. And they all bring the Monster Energy punch. So if you've been living in the White can, branch out. Ultra's got a flavor for every vibe. And every single one is Zero Sugar Tap the banner to learn more.
Episode #646 - Hey Patty!!
Release Date: March 14, 2026
Host: Theo Von
In this freewheeling solo episode, Theo Von reflects on the meaning of St. Patrick’s Day, shares personal updates about his mental health and self-care, offers comedic observations from his recent trip to Albuquerque, and dives into stories from his and listeners’ time as busboys. A big focus is on the upcoming movie "Bus Boys"—an independent project he created with David Spade, celebrating restaurant culture and DIY artistic ambition.
(Starts around 00:23)
(Begins at 03:00)
(07:07–13:00)
(13:00–28:00)
(28:00–37:00)
(31:04–54:39)
(54:40–71:49)
Selection of Funniest and Most Memorable Stories:
Theo’s voice remains that of a Southern raconteur—warm, self-deprecating, irreverently honest, and quick with a joke. The episode is conversational, looping in-and-out of serious and absurd, marked by memorable phrasing, recurring bits (“Have you tried the green chilies?”), and affirming, empathetic asides to his listeners.
This episode is a blend of heartfelt humor, reflection, and working-class nostalgia. Theo offers fans a window into his current headspace, childhood, and evolution as a creator—culminating in an invitation to support indie film and the underdog spirit. “Bus Boys” is positioned as the product of creative grit, and the bus boy segment is both a celebration and a remembering of those making their way, one cleared table at a time.
Call to Action:
Final Advice:
“Be good to yourselves because you deserve it, you know? … One day at a time. Can I do this today? That’s been helping me recently.” (74:00)
Gang, gang. Have you tried the green chilies?