Thoroughly ADHD: "ADHD-Smart Strategies For Food, Drink, And Fun"

Host: Alex Delmar, Certified ADHD Coach
Date: December 12, 2025

Episode Overview

Alex Delmar addresses the special challenges people with ADHD face at social events—especially around food, drink, and fun during party seasons. With holiday parties as a backdrop, Alex explores why self-regulation is so difficult at such events and offers ADHD-centered strategies to avoid the all-too-common pitfalls of overeating, over-drinking, and emotional fallout. The tone is supportive, candid, and practical, reflecting Alex's dual perspective as both a coach and someone with lived ADHD experience.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

Why Parties Are Challenging for ADHD (00:00–03:00)

• Sensory Overload + Impulsivity: Parties come with “the sheer volume of things to consume,” which, when combined with ADHD traits like inattention, impulsivity, and social awkwardness, can “create an environment where it is way too easy for people with ADHD to overeat and to drink too much.”
• Holiday Stressors: Additional responsibilities and distractions around holidays further destabilize good habits, making decision-making harder.
  • “...the additional responsibilities and distractions impact our ability to maintain healthy habits and this in turn impacts our ability to make good decisions.”
• Preparation Is Key: Arriving at an event tired, hungry, and anxious is “the most likely scenario to negatively impact your ability to make good decisions right off the bat.” (01:28)

ADHD, Overindulgence, and Interoception (03:00–05:00)

• Poor Interoception: “Our brains don't do a great job of interpreting signals from our bodies. We can accidentally eat tasty treats until our belly aches because each bite gives us a little hit of dopamine and we didn’t receive the ‘I’m full’ signal.” (03:45)
• Guidelines Are Essential: Decide in advance how much to eat/drink for the night. “Be realistic… your goal is to feel good when the party ends, not deprived or ashamed.”

Practical Food Strategies (05:00–09:00)

• Pre-set Standards: Before the party, set clear food/drink guidelines for yourself.
• Mood Check-Ins: “Periodically check your mood to make sure you aren't at risk of drowning your feelings.”
• Buffet Dangers:
  • “Parties with a self-service buffet are the greatest risk because of the opportunity for endless grazing and non-existent portion control.” (05:58)
  • Memorable Moment: Alex admits, “I was once so engrossed in a conversation I found myself halfway through a piece of cake that I didn’t even realize had been handed to me.” (06:28)
• Smart Buffet Navigation:
  • Scout all options first, then build a plate starting with the healthiest items and ending with the least healthy.
  • Take only one serving, with most of the plate being healthier options.
  • “Don’t go back for a second serving of anything unless it’s the best thing you’ve ever had in your entire life and you won’t be able to stop thinking about it.” (08:18)

Seating and Social Dynamics (09:00–10:30)

• Physical Distance from Temptation: “As soon as you have filled your plate, look for a seat far away from the food.”
  • If continuing a conversation, suggest moving: “Let's sit over there so you can tell me more about it.” (09:55)
• Pick Seats Wisely: “Do not sit in that lone chair in the corner. Pick a seat that makes it easy for people to talk to you.”

Activity Alternatives and Engagement (10:30–12:00)

• Stay Busy: “Help in the kitchen, play games, dance, sing karaoke, or decorate a page for the scrapbook.” These hands-on activities help avoid boredom/anxiety and distract from food.

Alcohol-Specific Strategies (12:00–14:00)

• Avoid Triggers: “The easiest way to avoid overindulging in food is to also avoid overindulging in alcohol, and the easiest way to do that is to not have any alcohol at all.”
• Start with Non-Alcoholic Drinks: “A stiff drink may seem especially attractive when you are uncomfortable, so always make your first drink non alcoholic while you settle in.” (12:42)
  • Tactic: Use a fancy glass with a citrus wedge—“My mom carried apple juice and club soda in a champagne glass and no one noticed in 30 years.” (13:02)
• Alcohol Impacts ADHD: “Alcohol impairs your ability to manage your ADHD symptoms, and that first drink can make you forget all about the intentions you set for this event.”

Knowing When to Leave & Self-Compassion (14:00–16:00)

• Set a Time Limit: Limit party duration and have a clear exit signal (e.g., when dessert is served).
• Listen to Warning Signs: “If your periodic mood check in returns the information that you are tired, it is time to leave. The more tired you are... the fewer resources you'll have available to self regulate.”
• Think About 'Future You': When in doubt, ask: “What effect might this have on future you—later tonight, tomorrow morning, or the next time you see these people?” (15:30)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Our brains don't do a great job of interpreting signals from our bodies. We can accidentally eat tasty treats until our belly aches because each bite gives us a little hit of dopamine and we didn’t receive the ‘I’m full’ signal.” — Alex Delmar (03:45)
• “Parties with a self-service buffet are the greatest risk because of the opportunity for endless grazing and non-existent portion control and it's a good place to hang out when you're not sure who to talk to.” (05:58)
• “Don’t go back for a second serving of anything unless it’s the best thing you’ve ever had in your entire life and you won’t be able to stop thinking about it.” (08:18)
• “My mom carried apple juice and club soda in a champagne glass and no one noticed in 30 years.” — Alex Delmar (13:02)
• “The more tired you are, the more you will crave sugar and simple carbs, the more appealing a drink will sound and the fewer resources you'll have available to self regulate.” (14:44)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Challenges at Parties for ADHD: 00:00–03:00
• Interoception & Planning: 03:00–05:00
• Buffet Strategies: 05:00–09:00
• Seating & Conversations: 09:00–10:30
• Activities to Stay Focused: 10:30–12:00
• Alcohol Management: 12:00–14:00
• Time Limits & 'Future You' Perspective: 14:00–16:00

Summary

Alex Delmar delivers a practical and relatable roadmap for ADHDers facing social events. With a focus on preparation, self-awareness, and actionable strategies—like plate-loading order, mood check-ins, and creative non-alcoholic drink tactics—he equips listeners to enjoy parties without the regret often triggered by impulsivity and inattention. The episode is both empathetic and empowering, offering insight and real-world tools for thriving through the festive season and beyond.