← Thriving with Addiction with Dr. Jonathan Avery
Thriving with Addiction with Dr. Jonathan Avery
Losing the Game, Finding Yourself with Montee Ball Jr.
00:37:16
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- [00:00]
A
Welcome to the Thriving With Addiction podcast, where we explore how recovery is not just about surviving, but about truly living. Each week, we'll dive into the science stories and strategies that help people and families heal from addiction and build healthier, more resilient lives. I'm your host, Dr. John Avery.
- [00:18]
B
Let's get started, John.
- [00:26]
C
I'm John Avery, and welcome back to Thriving with Addiction. Today I'm joined By Monte Ball, Jr. He's one of the most accomplished running backs in college football history, whose life ultimately became defined not just by records, but by recovery. A dominant high school and University of Wisconsin star, Ball set NCAA records for career touchdowns, earned multiple All American honors, won the Doak Walker Award, and finished fourth in Heisman Trophy voting, although he should have finished higher. My editorial note there. Drafted in the second round by the Denver Broncos in 2013, his NFL career was cut short as injuries took their toll. After legal trouble and personal challenges, Ball entered recovery, rebuilt his life, and is now sober, a father, and doing incredible work helping others. He was recently inducted into the College Football hall of Fame and uses a story to help those facing addiction and identity loss. Monte, thanks for coming.
- [01:22]
B
Hey, thank you so much for having me. It's always a privilege and an honor to share my story, so thank you for bringing me on.
- [01:30]
C
Of course. No, I'm very lucky to have you. And I was just watching the College Football hall of Fame. Congrats. That must have been such an honor.
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B
Thank you. It was. When you think about it, right. It's been really challenging for me to really put into words just all the years of dreaming. Right. Of being remembered. Right. We play the game to win, to build that camaraderie with our guys to give back to our fans and our family. And then, of course, if you're fortunate enough, blessed enough, you get that last, last honor. Right. Of being immortalized inside of the Enshrinement Building there in Atlanta. And so it was wonderful experience and truly an honor.
- [02:10]
C
Well deserved. And it was a lot of work to get there. Take me back to the beginning. Were you from a football family, or how'd you end up being in such a spar?
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B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So back in the beginning, it's. My father played in high school. He didn't go on to play much more from there. My mother ran track growing up. She was really good at that. I get a lot of my athletic abilities from my mother. Not saying my father wasn't athletic, but my mother was very, very fast growing up. And so for. For me, it was, you know, football was Always what I wanted to do. I was eight years old. I remember being outside throwing the football with my cousin. Wasn't playing the game yet, just sort of playing catch with him. Ran inside and saw my dad watching football. And just like any other kid, right, I was in before the streetlights came on, getting ready, washing up for dinner and all that stuff. And all of a sudden, see, you know, I see him watching TV and he's watching the Denver Broncos. And of course at that moment, I had no clue what was going on. So I just started asking him so many questions as to who are the guys on the field, you know, who are those zebra printed shirts running around throwing those yellow towels, you know, that's how I was saying. And of course he started answering the questions and like any other kid, right, I saw how excited that sport made him. So I wanted to make my dad excited. I wanted to be a football player. And so I told him, I want to be a running back for the Denver Broncos at the age of eight. And he was like, well, we got to get you into football. Before I know it, I was, I was playing some football, wanting to be a running back for the Broncos.
- [03:49]
C
And it came naturally right away.
- [03:51]
B
It did not, to be honest with you. So Little league football growing up in Wentzville, Missouri, it's about 40 miles straight west of St. Louis on Highway 70, played Little League football there did not come natural, that being being a ball carrier. So the rules here in this league, you know, had to be under a certain amount of weight in order to carry the football. I was over that way. So I actually played linebacker for the first four years of my football journey. That part came somewhat natural, right. Chase the ball, tackle the person with the ball, just be a Tasmanian devil. That came somewhat natural. But once I became a ball carrier, that, that there, there was, there was a little bit of a learning curve, but, but once I was able to get over top of that, yeah, the rest was, was history. I knew exactly what I wanted to be.
- [04:45]
C
And that doesn't come easy. I imagine your family had to dedicate a lot of resources and time once they recognized that you had that unique skill to get you in a college ready physical form and, and out on the field.
- [05:00]
B
Yeah, I, I, in order to become a ball carrier at the age of 12, you know, I had to drop, I think it was £12. So I did that on my own at the age of 12, ate salads, ran, drank a significant amount of water. But yeah, once I was able to become a ball carrier right in Middle school. And then, of course, once high school came about. Right. You know, once it got to the level of okay, yeah, you know, I can really take this on to the next level. Um, I think my. My family, they did sacrifice or rather invest into my athletic abilities or rather, you know, training, you know, during the summer and all that stuff. And so they. They most definitely did reallocate some funds to. To make sure that I was supported. And I'm very grateful for them for doing that because it worked out. They. Their bet. Their bet hit.
- [05:57]
C
No, that's great. No, it does take a whole family to get to the professional levels for sure. And you've talked a little bit about your family in terms of your substance use journey as well. What did you know growing up? I know you've been open about that your dad struggled and your grandfather, but what did you know about that growing up? And maybe tell me a little bit more about them.
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B
I'm so glad you're asking that because, you know, it's very important to me, that paternal lineage. Right. I am open, but I want to preface this by stating that my father has been huge in my recovery journey. Right. Just having someone that close to me, of course, that I know very well, and vice versa, him knowing me very well, just to get some advice from him, a lot of advice from him as I charted down my own recovery journey. And so, yes, my father is a proud recovering alcoholic as well. And he was somebody, of course, growing up, you know, I never had the opportunity and thank goodness. Right, I should say that, but never saw my father drunk or whatsoever because he actually started his recovery journey at the age of 21. They had me when they were 19, so I wasn't old enough, of course, to see, you know, how he was pre sobriety. But thank goodness, you know, thank my mother, thank my father's support system, thank my father that he was able to get on the recovery journey track because, you know, come full circle. Of course, I was one that struggled with it. And then he was someone that was able to lean in and. And get a lot of advice from and get the treatment, get the help, get the. You know, how do we continue to fight this monster every single day? Dad, how did you do it? How are you doing it? Can you help me? And so, you know, my father is someone. It's very, very important in. In my recovery journey. And same for my mother, of course, too. She saw it with my father. She noticed it, of course, with me. My sisters as well. They. They all came to my beck and call. In a sense, right. They, they, they ran, they, they helped me whenever I was on the ground, picked me up and got me into treatment.
- [08:05]
C
That's, that's wonderful. Did they get in recovery in a similar way you did? Were they involved in 12 step or did they talk about their process when you were growing up?
- [08:14]
B
My dad did not, or my grandfather as well. My grandfather, rest his soul, was for sure always there for us. He's a war vet, Vietnam. And so, you know, he faced his own challenges, his own ptsd, of course, and would, you know, my, my mother, you know, he had his benefits, of course. Right. So when my parents would go to work and when we weren't in school, my grandfather was watching us and most definitely miss him to death, but didn't have many, many opportunities of right to chat with him about it. He passed my freshman year in college when I was 18. But my father, yes, absolutely. While he did not go through the 12 step routes, he's more of a, of a cold turkey person. Again, I'm saying yes just to the fact that I was able to just pick his about so many things. But he did not go into treatment like I did. He did not go to the 12 step route. You know, he comes from, you know, the baby boomers. Right. He's a Gen X, but his parents were baby boomers. They pulled up their bootstraps and, you know, go the cold turkey route. But you know, my father is someone, of course, that I continue to lean on today and we have quite the relationship because of that and I'm blessed for that.
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C
That's great. And so they were there for you growing up, helping you get into this football career. And then it really took off in high school. That's when you thought you might have a shot at going to a big, big college. What was that like? How did it develop for you over time?
- [09:43]
B
And yeah, that's right. College or, excuse me, high school right there in Wentzville High. Timberland High School out there in Wentzville. I would say come my late sophomore year, I started to really sense it. Okay. You know, I'm, I'm, I'm pretty good, I'm pretty good. Like I, I, I, I'm, I'm on magazines, I'm getting, you know, some, some attention from the press, the media, some scouts. And then come my junior year when I really took off at 3,000 yards that one season and over 40 something touchdowns, that's when I knew, right? That's like, I was like, okay, you know, I'm really going to Go on to the next level. I'm really going to take some time to just sit down and figure out where that's going to be. Of course. Right. I have to sit there and wait for the offers to come in. But I KN knew in my heart, my family knew as well that, okay, this is going to happen. And so, again, I would say in 20, that would have been in 2008. Yeah, 2008. They really started to pour money, energy, time and effort into figuring out where I was going to train during the off season, figuring out what I was, you know, the stretching I was going to do, the amount of liquids I'm going to be consuming a day. Right. We really put a lot of time in it, which is why I'm so grateful for my family every single day. But that was when we knew. And so once those offers started to come in, you know, I took my visits to Iowa, took my visits to Iowa State, Mizzou, many different places. But once I was blessed enough to receive an offer from the University of Wisconsin Madison, I took my official visit there in December, and it was a night game against Ohio State. And here's the craziest part. I took more official visits to Iowa than I did Wisconsin. Almost was a Hawkeye. But once I took my official visit there to Wisconsin, had the opportunity to learn about the campus, which is extremely beautiful. Right. Understanding that it's an isthmus. There's two lakes, or, excuse me, there's a lake on each side of it. Understanding the education there, and of course, the football program, the way they run the football, the long history that they have of running backs there. And then seeing that night game against Ohio State, I was sold. I was sold. I was like, this is where I want to play football at. This is the stage I want to play at. This is the atmosphere I want to be in. This is the school I want to go learn at. It all checked the box. All the boxes were checked.
- [12:15]
C
Incredible. And for those that don't understand how big those numbers are, you were running over people. Those are gigantic numbers you had in high school. The 3,000 yards and all those touchdowns. You were untouchable. And I can tell how hard your family really worked to get you there. And then to see. I went to the. We were saying before we started, I went to the University of Florida and I saw the Swamp. And, you know, the college football stadium atmosphere, it's just so big. And, you know, the whole community, like at uf, similar to Wisconsin, it revolves around the football team. Did that bring a Lot of pressure your way. Did you feel the pressure in high school as you made your way to this big school, or how did you navigate that back then? I don't think you were drinking back then, is that right?
- [13:03]
B
Great question. So I, I, I experimented a few times with alcohol in high school. Literally, I can count on one hand how many times I did. It wasn't something that I was really interested in. I knew where I wanted to get to. It wasn't part of the puzzle, right. To get me to where I wanted to get to. Right. It just didn't make any sense to me. But there were moments where I experimented. But of course, in hindsight, now, understanding how all of that works, you know, the, the seed was planted in the sense that, you know, the epigenetics, the study of epigenetics, that I wake up the gene, what have you. We can sit here and question that until the end of time, but the seed was planted. And so, no, I didn't experiment a lot, but a few times I did. Now fast forward to college to your question. You know, there was pressure, right? It happened a little bit in high school. I guess that's why I experimented. But come college, right? Bigger stage, more fans watching, more obligations, right. The sport demands a lot more at a D1 school. Yeah. There were many moments, of course, in college where I strengthened that relationship with the bottle. Many great moments, right? Learning from the greats, being able to learn from Barry Alvarez, being able to be coached by Brett Bielema, to many other coaches as well, and playing side by side with J.J. watt, Russell Wilson, Melvin Gordon, James Way, all these greats. Something that I'll absolutely never forget. And so blessed to be a Badger for those reasons. But now, with that said, there were moments, of course, where I felt as if my life was, you know, I was living in a fishbowl. That fishbowl Experience. Experience. Excuse me, going to class after you make a mistake on the football field or even going to class after winning a game. Right. It's this fishbowl experience where social anxiety gets a little high. You're kind of feeling a lot of pressures, right? You're kind of carrying a torch that a young kid doesn't understand that they're carrying until. Until they do, I guess, in a sense. And so for me, it was a lot to carry. I was fortunate enough to carry it, but I was struggling, of course. I was really strengthening that relationship with the bottle in college.
- [15:25]
C
And at first, as I understand your career, at first you weren't getting on the field the first year of college, but eventually some people got hurt, and then you had your breakout game, and then success came like wildfire that.
- [15:39]
B
Those.
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C
Those next years. Is that right?
- [15:41]
B
Yes, sir. Yes, sir. My freshman year in 2009, I, you know, barely played. You know, I had a guy, a couple guys in front of me that were performing well, and it just wasn't my time yet. Come my sophomore year, first half of my sophomore season in 2010, same script, wasn't playing a lot. I felt as if I was doing all that I needed to do in order to play, but evidently not true. And so in 2010, we were able to play the Ohio State Buckeyes when they were ranked number one in the country, and we actually beat them. That was somewhat of the first, third of the season, maybe somewhat of the half of the season. We played them, and I didn't play a single snap that game, and fans rushed the field. And of course I was excited, but I was still a little, you know, it was a bittersweet moment, like, thank goodness we won. But gosh, I wish I would have gotten an opportunity to. To get some. Some clock some playing time. Well, I remember going home and extremely frustrated right at the age of 19, super frustrated, not understanding what I want to do. If this is the right trajectory for me. I don't know if this is going to go well. You know, many different questions going on in my mind, many doubts. I remember having a conversation with my father, and he said, you know, this is what you signed up for. Maybe you need to work harder, you need to study longer, you need to lift longer, be the last one to leave the weight room, do more conditioning. Well, all of that wasn't able to come about in one week, but for one week, I was trying to knock all of those things out to be the last. And the long story short, we played Iowa Hawkeyes the next week, and I was giving it my all leading up to that game in practice and stuff, and it was still the same. I was going to be third string. Not much is going to change in one week. Well, the two running backs ahead of me unfortunately suffered an injury. And during that game, and I remember the running backs coach turning around to me and saying, it's time to put up or shut up. Literally what he said to me because he knew I was complaining. I wasn't playing in all that game until come the fourth quarter. I go in, I catch a slant route on fourth and one. Extend the change. Mind you, we're down by seven points here, down by six points. And then four plays later, end up scoring the game winning touchdown. And from that moment, never gave. Never gave the position back, never gave it back. In Kinnick Stadium in Iowa, you know, my journey on the football field in the collegiate realm to the pros was born.
- [18:18]
C
Not only did you not give it back, you became the best running back in college football. That next season, you dominated completely. What was that like?
- [18:25]
B
Yeah. Yes, sir. So again, what I learned from that moment was to. You got to put the work in, right? That's just it. There are no shortcuts. You have to put the work in. All the greats understand that. There are no shortcuts to the top. And so for me, going into my 2011 season, yes, it helped landing Russell Wilson, that most definitely made us, you know, a little bit more diverse, a lot more diverse in offense. But leading into that season, I. During our strength and conditioning sessions during the summer, I would jog to the strength and conditioning session at the stadium and then do that session with the team and then jog home afterwards just to get some extra conditioning in, just to become lighter on my feet, trim the fat, become lighter, et cetera. And so I was doing so many extra things to become better on the football field leading up until my 2011 season to where it showed on the field come 2011, you know, we. I was blessed to play along some greats, right? And like I said, I just named Russell Wilson and we were rolling, we were steamrolling teams. Just wanted to set that standard, right? Because leading into that season, in the summer, I was setting that standard. My teammates saw me running after strength and conditioning session, they would get on their mopeds, right, and go home not saying they were doing anything wrong. I just wanted to go the extra mile, literally and figuratively. And so I would. I wouldn't even shower or anything. I would just take a little break, drink some water, and then drive home. And so that's what set me apart. That plus studying tape longer, right? Literally digesting and dissecting the film and wanting to be the best in that show.
- [20:14]
C
It did. And I think if Russell Wilson didn't split some Heisman votes, that the next year you might have. I mean, you were so dominant. I remember that season so well, and it was one for the history books. And so you had two more seasons, right, in Wisconsin and then. And then you were. You were drafted by the pros. What was that like?
- [20:35]
B
Yeah, yeah, I just to chat real quick about that Heisman thing. I. Yeah, I do. I truly believe this and I know I'VE come from a humble family. That's who I am. I'm Missourian, right? From Missouri. Small town guy. But that super blessed and fortunate and grateful and thankful to have been, you know, had the opportunity to go to New York for the heism, but I just, oh, my gosh, I don't understand it. I was like, I was, congratulations to RG3. But I was like, my goodness, what else do I got to do? Yeah. Oh, my. What does a running back have to do to win that? But so awesome to meet those guys there. Seriously now. Yes. Fast forward to the NFL. You know, I grew up a Broncos fan. My entire life, my room was blue and orange starting from the age of eight in a small town in Missouri, all the way up until, of course, I left for college. You know, didn't want to paint my room in college blue on orange, but always wanted to be a Bronco. That was my team, still my team today. And so when that phone call came in, you know, I had a little draft party in Madison, in a hotel in Madison, in the banquet hall. And come second round, you know, everyone's having fun behind me. They're, you know, we had beverages, we had food for them, family, friends, et cetera. And my phone was propped up against a glass of water and a 303 number called. It started to vibrate, it fell. I stood up, I picked it up. Of course, you know, it said Denver, Colorado. I started hitting my dad. I started hitting my mom and showing her. She started crying. My dad was crying. And then of course, I answered it and it was, it was John Elway, right? You know, as a little kid watching la, my father watching la, and then Elway calling your phone and saying, you know, in this next pick, we're going to pick you. Would you like to be a Denver Bronco? Dream come true. Literally, a dream come true. That was honestly a dream come true. And so although my career was cut short of two seasons, of course there are many things I would love to go back and change. But when you look at everything right now, in hindsight, from my college years, of what I was able to accomplish, thank goodness, because of my teammates, my coaches, fans, family, and then of course, getting drafted by my favorite team and playing side by side with Peyton Manning, playing in the super bowl, my rookie year against Russell Wilson, being in AFC championship, you know, Dr. Avery was again, many things I would change. But my goodness, what a journey.
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C
And you worked hard for that journey. And it was a shame the injuries got in the way with the career.
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B
But that's for everybody. Yeah.
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C
And the drinking also sort of got in the way. Maybe speak a little bit about how that sort of. I know it emerged towards the end of college there, but what did it look like as you got into the pros and how did it, do you think, impact your pro career?
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B
Absolutely. I think it's something that's, it's, it wasn't addressed right. I didn't address it in college, um, mainly because I had, there was this feedback loop of, well, obviously nothing's going, Nothing's wrong, Nothing's wrong. Obviously my, my relationship with the bottle isn't impacting me because I'm still accomplishing my dreams. Mom and dad. See, I told you nothing's wrong. You know, it was LA called and so it was one of those situations where do I almost wish that I saw more red flags in college so I could have done this self diagnostic check. I don't know. Would I have even listened to anybody at that moment? I don't know. And so once I was drafted, figuratively speaking, it's almost as if I packed my alcoholism up as well in my suitcase and took off to Denver, Colorado. And so that was never addressed. Now you give a kid money, more fame, etc. Not making excuses just to paint the whole picture here. I, I, of course, I spent dollars partying, drinking, living that lifestyle where of course it, it had an inevitable end of, of one of the lights going out. I still have that relationship with the bottle. That slippery slope came into effect where slipped into depression once that door closed from football and became upset at every single person around me except myself. Because, yes, it's an addiction, yes, it's a chemical dependency. However, there were moments in the NFL where I knew that this relationship is ruining my relationship with football.
- [25:26]
C
And then after your second season, you had that really difficult legal moment that sort of ended up being your impetus for change. Do you want to speak a little bit about what happened there?
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B
Absolutely, yes. Again, transparency has been the best route for me. And I've always been honest about the situation and always will be, you know, because that's the route to go. Even when the situation happened, I never blamed anyone, never even blamed alcohol. So for me, again, when I mentioned that once I saw the door closing, you know, I knew it was coming. You know, I didn't, I wasn't man enough, in a sense. I didn't have the strength to look myself in the mirror and say, you know, the things that you've learned to get to this point are some are the things you Gotta, gotta utilize now, right? When I wasn't playing in college, I looked at myself in the mirror and said, I gotta do better. It's on me. I gotta study longer, I gotta run longer, faster, harder, etc. Well, I didn't tap into that same mindset because I was drowning in the bottle, right? I wanted to blame everybody else in the moment, at the time. And so for me, I took my frustrations out in one evening on someone very close to me, my partner at the time. And because of those actions, I landed in jail come February 5, I believe, of 2016, which was a Friday. And so I spent the weekend in jail in Madison, Wisconsin, and ended up watching the Denver Broncos win Super Bowl 50 against the Panthers while I was in jail. That was February 7, 2016, a Sunday. And so I remember sitting in there watching that and that was
- [27:14]
C
not a
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B
great feeling, but something I needed to experience because I needed a wake up call. First off, this is not who I am. This is something I've never done. I think I've only had one speeding ticket up until that point, so never had any issues with the law. And so again, it was just one of those situations where alcohol, not to blame it on the bottle, but it was changing who I was, literally. And so once I was able to get out of jail, saw a judge on that Monday and got out, I remember my mother sitting on the floor when I went back to their home, my parents home, and she was crying, crying, saying, you know, you need help, I don't know who this is. And she was right. You know, my sisters couldn't recognize me, my father, my mom, you know, I was completely immersed in drinking. It was my personality completely had me. And so my family was huge in my recovery journey. The start of it of sort of having an intervention with me and telling me, you need to get some help because this isn't who you are. And so I went into intensive outpatient treatment, did family group, individual, group and, excuse me, did family, individual and group therapy for a 12 week program for about 12 to 15 hours a week. And then once I completed that, I then just completed 170 hours of just individual therapy to follow that. And so I put the work in Dr. Avery, and I learned so much through that process.
- [28:53]
C
That same tenacity you used to advance your football career, it sounds like you used that to advance your recovery there.
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B
Yes, sir.
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C
It was not just recovery, it was, it sounds like mental health support and therapy was a big part of it as well.
- [29:06]
B
Huge. I know that there are a Million, million ways up that hill. Right. Many different routes one can take. I am such an advocate for therapy because obviously, I know, like, individual therapy would be the lowest level of care. And it's. And it's a great entry, great entry point for me. At the time I needed the higher level. So they jumped me up to Iop, and thank goodness they did because I needed a little bit more intensive treatment. And throughout that process, mind you, I completed this at a facility right behind Camp Randall Stadium. So I faced the music. I went to group therapy in Madison, Wisconsin, and I needed that. I needed to be humbled. I needed to understand my actions, how there may be a ripple effect. Hopefully not. But long story short, I needed to get my mind right because that's not who I was. And so I was under the impression that therapy was, you know, I was gonna have so many conversations with my therapist about alcohol. No, 95% of the conversations were about my relationships with people and myself. And so I was able to understand who I am outside the game of football, because once that door started to close, it was almost like I had a quarter life crisis, in a sense, an identity crisis. Not knowing who I'm going to be, what I'm going to do. Who's Monte without the game, I freaked out. I freaked out and drowned that with alcohol and made a very poor, poor decision.
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C
But you didn't waste the crisis. You used it to build. And who did Monty become through all that work?
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B
Yeah. Yes. I thank you for asking that. It's. I like to think of myself now as. As, ooh, wow. For the last 10 years, I've spent my time helping so many people, so many families, right, to get connected to the right resources in the community. There are so many resources out there, but the right ones, right? The ones that are actually providing the right care, the ones that will provide the right services for that right person, for that specific individual, is something that I've taken a lot of pride in for the last 10 years. There were moments where I. When in Madison, Wisconsin, some of the projects that I worked on, when the stay at home order was put into Place in 2020, and long story short, the city contracted with hotels, and they placed people experiencing homelessness in these hotels while I was with the treatment facility at the time. And I was sort of sent to this hotel, and I lived there for nine months in 2020. Getting people connected to resources, getting those that figuratively felt as if they were on the ground, right? Helping them to get on their feet, get connected to their benefits. If they were eligible. Getting connected to resources, job training, et cetera. Something that literally changed my life. Dr. Avery, in 2020, because I wanted to be of service. I've come to find out that service is my medicine. And so if I were to say who I am today, I'm someone who loves to give service, love to be of service to those in recovery, those in their mental health journey, whatever that may be. That's who I am. And I also take a lot of pride, of course, in helping out these organization and businesses as well. In business development, I like to help those that are in need of services, but I also understand that we have to focus as well on what these services are. Not from the clinical standpoint, it's not who I am, but just from the business development side of how to become culturally appropriate to specific communities. And so for myself, I like to call myself a business development professional right in the mental health space. And something I've been doing for 10 years. I'm proud of it.
- [33:07]
C
And you should be. You've helped so many people along the way. And it was nice to then I imagine this last year be recognized for all the football accomplishments and to almost come back into the football space as a different person in some way to the College Football hall of Fame, the Rose bowl hall of Fame. I've seen you everywhere on TV these days. It's been nice to be honored for that past, but also to be someone different now. That's a nice, a nice combo of things over this last year, sir.
- [33:36]
B
Yeah, it's come full circle. Wow, full circle, right? It really has. I would not be here without, you know, the support from my family, my friends, folks like yourself, you know, wanting to, to share these stories because that's the, that's the point of, of, of all of this. Main thing is to help so many people just to understand the landscape of what's out there. Insurances, verification of benefits, to levels of care, to dual diagnosis, co occurring to all this terminology, just helping people to understand what it is is the main thing. But also sharing stories like this because it's inevitable to not make any mistakes again. Now what this mistake may be, that varies. But what we're seeing, of course, with our youth is they're facing so much pressure because they're just so nervous about making mistakes with these cell phones, with social media. The societal pressures that they're facing are unfortunately putting them in the directions of self medicating. And the data is quite alarming, unfortunately. And so for me, I just want to be a voice. I want to use this platform to speak on something way greater than myself, which is mental health.
- [34:50]
C
That's amazing. It's an amazing legacy for you and also for your son. I know being a father is also a big motivator for you as well, Is that right?
- [34:58]
B
Yes, sir. That is correct. That is correct. My son, Maverick, was huge in my recovery journey. He. He's. He's nine now, so he's, he'll.
- [35:12]
C
He'll.
- [35:12]
B
He'll come to understand for sure. But. So my, my son was born April 2, 2016. I want to start by saying I've, I've thank goodness blessed to say that I was able to make amends with my partner, former partner, within the last four to five years. When my son was born, it was his mother, of course, from a woman that lived in Denver, Colorado. And at the time, I had no clue that he was even in the womb. And so when he came about, I was like, whoa. Wow.
- [35:56]
C
So it was the same time you were going through all these other changes?
- [35:59]
B
Same exact time. Literally, once I stepped out of jail of the weekend, two weeks later, I was. The information was shared with me that I'm pretty much going to be a dad in seven weeks. And so I got a great relationship with my son's mother. Well, we've never come into any of those issues whatsoever, and she's a great mother to him, and so I'm blessed to have him and I can't wait to have that conversation with him.
- [36:32]
C
Well, I'm very lucky to have this conversation with you today. I really appreciate you taking the time. It's an inspirational story that I think will benefit so many more, and you've benefited so many already. So thank you so much for sharing with us today.
- [36:44]
B
Yes, sir. Thank you for having me. Thank you for what you do as well. Right. For. For, for our communities.
- [36:49]
A
Thanks for listening to the Thriving With Addiction podcast. If you found today's episode helpful, please follow and subscribe wherever you listen to your podcasts and share it with someone who might benefit. You can also connect with me on Instagram, LinkedIn and YouTube or visit thrivingwithaddiction.com to learn more. Stay tuned for next week's episode. And remember, thriving is possible.