James McCann & The Tribes of Comedy

Summary

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TigerBelly — "James McCann & The Tribes of Comedy" (June 17, 2026)

Podcast: TigerBelly
Host: Bobby Lee (with Khalyla, Ramsey, Cat, Luke, and guest James McCann)
Guest: James Donald Forbes McCann
Description: A wide-ranging, hilarious, and sometimes profound conversation about comedy’s tribal structure, cultural identity, international stand-up, and the animal behaviors of performers and audiences alike.

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Episode Overview

This episode features Australian comedian James McCann engaging with Bobby Lee and the TigerBelly crew in an energetic, raucous discussion. The group explores the intricate "tribes" of stand-up comedy, the path of non-American comics in the US, and the quirks of international comedy cultures. They also dive into personal stories, awkward encounters, and the self-reflection that accompanies a career in stand-up. Alongside the in-depth chat are plenty of riffs, detours into animal facts, and the usual irreverence and warmth for which TigerBelly is known.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Comedy Store as Comedy’s “Harvard” (01:27–02:10)

• Bobby Lee welcomes new "sidekick" Luke, a Comedy Store door person, comparing the club’s famed hierarchy and community to elite academic institutions.
  • Bobby: "For in terms of comedy institutions, it could be viewed as a Harvard or a Yale...or MIT, Cambridge, Hogwarts." (01:47)

Hogwarts Sorting & Generational Differences

• The group jokingly sorts Luke into Hogwarts "houses," riffing on Harry Potter and generational differences in pop culture literacy.
• Notable Quote:
  • Bobby (to Luke): "I feel like an owl wouldn’t deliver your [letter], it would be like a pigeon or something. You get like a post-it note." (02:23)

2. Looksmaxing, Genetics, and Family Banter (06:28–08:59)

• An in-depth and tongue-in-cheek discussion about "looksmaxing"—the quest for maxing out your looks. Luke explains the Gen Z/online obsession with mathematically improving your appearance.
  • Luke: "Looksmaxing is basically just to mathematically make yourself the most good looking that you can, through any means necessary." (06:34)
  • Bobby and others riff on whose family members are most attractive, with escalating absurdity.

Celebrity "In or Out" Game

• The hosts play a rapid-fire "in/out" game on photos of women and men in their 60s–80s, debating attractiveness in a playful, sometimes absurd fashion. (08:30–14:39)
• Memorable Exchange:
  • Bobby: “I would date Cher.”
  • Ramsey: “You’re only picking celebrities.” (08:44–08:54)
  • Bobby: “How can you be out on William Defoe?” (11:59)

3. Comedy, Cultural Identity & Belonging (24:19–27:16)

• Bobby discusses how being Asian American and growing up as a "minority" in the US affected his social experience, especially compared to Australian guest James.
  • James: “I feel like minorities in America are nicer to me than they are to conventional whites.” (25:16)
  • Explores nuances in how “outsider” status works differently for Australians and Americans, especially among comedians.

4. The Tribes and Clans of Comedy (53:34–56:26)

• James reflects on the "tribal" structure of American comedy—Marvel vs. DC, coaching trees, openers, and “crime families”—with different generations and geographies building out comedy "universes."
  • James: “It’s all tribes and clans...like Marvel vs. DC. In the NFL, they have coaching trees. I see this with people’s openers.” (54:15)

The Comedy 'Game of Thrones'

• The crew likens comedy scenes in LA, New York, Austin, Nashville, etc., to empires and alliances in "Game of Thrones".
  • Bobby: “At the end of the day, all hail to the king.” (54:54)
  • Discussing “kings,” “peasants,” and the roles comedians occupy in these circles.

5. Comedy Scenes Around the World (66:13–68:08)

• James describes starting out in Adelaide, Australia:
  • Smaller cities see regular waves of talent that build up the scene, then leave for bigger markets.
  • The effect of the internet in letting acts bypass traditional local circuits.

The Problem with Local “Lifers”

• Longtime local comedians become bitter openers/hosts for touring headliners, often causing friction with fresh perspectives.
  • Bobby (on corporate comics): “Their jokes are very generic about family or, yeah, driving and local references.... It’s not what comedy’s about.” (76:16)
  • James: “In every city, there are people that have been doing comedy for 20+ years and never moved...there’s a bitterness.” (72:14)

6. Cross-Cultural Comedy, Asian Identity & Representation (79:40–84:55)

• Bobby and James explore intra-Asian dynamics, generational trauma, and representation in comedy:
  • James: “Koreans have maybe the least Asian archetypal personality...masculinity and just a constant threat of violence in a very American way.” (79:49)
  • Bobby: “Even other Asians don’t like me! ... They find me unpalatable.” (80:03)
• The importance of figures like Margaret Cho for non-traditional Asian comic voices.

7. Side-Stories & Irreverent Tangents

• Animal Segments: Riffs on quokkas, animal facts, and who resembles what animal. (65:02–65:54)
• Sauna Stories: Hilarious recounting of awkward Korean spa/sauna moments, cultural differences around nudity, and personal embarrassment.
  • Bobby: “As a free American citizen slash Korean person...I fly naked. So when I’m at the spa, I go fully nude...a lot of white people cover themselves up.” (30:27–31:13)

Gooning & Internet Culture

• Luke introduces the TigerBelly crew to "gooning"—pushing the boundaries of internet-fueled self-gratification and youth culture. (42:33–43:37)

8. The Philosophy of Stand-Up and Self-Expression (74:48–77:02)

• Bobby emphasizes the importance of authenticity and personal style over bland universal routines.
  • Bobby: “I always thought...I’m being myself. You have to pretend you’re a comedian more than finding your own point of view...I don’t think that’s what comedy’s about.” (75:36–76:24)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Comedy’s Caste System:
  "There are treasonous folks, and there are also kings and emperors and there’s also peasants. It’s very Game of Thrones-y." — Bobby (54:40)

• On International Comedy Scenes:
  ”There’s always room to play in a greater extent...but a million to two-million city gets really good, 15–20 people, then they all leave, and then it crashes.” — James (68:26)

• On Generational Trauma in Korean Comedy:
  "There’s something wrong with us, and I think it’s the Japanese oppression of 50 years...It’s generational trauma and it’s just the way we are." — Bobby (82:53)

• On “Trying” in Showbiz:
  “You take a big risk, you fly all the way over there, you tape it, you cut it together and you...pitch it and they all say no. And I call that trying.” — Bobby (61:43)

• On Style and Generational Change:
  “Your generation killed something. What happened?” — Bobby, jokingly blaming Gen Z’s style for the supposed death of punk/edgy counter-culture (86:05)

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Timeline of Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |-----------|---------------------| | 01:27–02:10 | Comedy Store prestige & Hogwarts analogy | | 06:28–08:59 | Looksmaxing and family looks debate | | 08:30–14:39 | Celebrity “in/out” game (older women, men, Willem Dafoe) | | 24:19–27:16 | Comedy, ethnic identity, and cultural belonging | | 53:34–56:26 | Comedy tribes, clans, and the Game of Thrones analogy | | 66:13–68:08 | Adelaide/Australian comedy scene, “waves” of comics | | 72:14–73:43 | Local lifers and openers, bitter hosts, awkward intros | | 74:48–77:02 | Bobby’s authenticity philosophy in stand-up | | 79:40–84:55 | Cross-Asian dynamics, Korean representation, Margaret Cho | | 86:05 | Generational critique, style “killed something” | | 30:27–31:13 | Korean spa nude confidence vs. white modesty (sauna segment) | | 42:33–43:37 | "Gooning" and internet-fueled masturbation |

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Episode Highlights & Tone

• Irreverent and warm, moving between roast-style humor and earnest reflection.
• International/outsider perspective provided by James creates a platform for comparing experiences in US vs. Australian comedy.
• Recurring themes: tribal identity, local vs. global comedy, authenticity, generational change, social awkwardness.
• Personal stories and animal metaphors ground abstract discussions in relatable detail.
• Moments of self-deprecating vulnerability from Bobby and guests offset the bravado and banter.

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Final Takeaway

A signature TigerBelly blend of riff-heavy chaos, genuine insight into the inner workings of stand-up and its caste systems, and cross-cultural storytelling. The addition of James McCann’s outsider observations and openness about the grind of international stand-up offers a sharp, self-aware understanding of comedy’s evolving tribal map.

Fans of “inside baseball” comedy talk, generational clashes, and the endless search for both laughter and belonging will find plenty to love.

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Transcript

[A]

I started Ornod in 2013 and we make bike apparel. The best part of Shopify for me is our ability to run the business as essentially non technical people. We're able to admin everything on the back end, front end and sell things online easily. If Shopify were a bike accessory, I think it would actually be the bicycle. It's the thing that you do the thing on. We run the business on Shopify. So start your free trial on shopify.com. we're on Spotify video. Hey, Tiger Belly video now available to watch on Spotify, everybody. Spotify Premium users get fewer ads and more eyes.

[B]

We love fewer ads and more eyes. We love more eyes.

[A]

Yeah, get the third eye fourth and watch more. Get Spotify Premium more watch videos and watch it sa. We have a new sidekick, Luke Bilton.

[C]

Was it Last name Bingo.

[A]

Bingo.

[D]

I like built it.

[C]

That's. I could. Yeah, whatever.

[A]

Yeah. Well, I want to say what your real name is.

[C]

It's Luke Binko.

[A]

Luke Bingo. Shy guy, huh? Yeah, yeah. Maybe you're a sweet little shy guy sometimes. Yeah, yeah. Luke works at the Comedy Store. He's a door person, much like Ramsey once was.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Cat still is. Yeah, right. It's a fine institution, number one. Yeah. For in terms of comedy institutions, it could be viewed as a Harvard or a Yale. Yale. Yeah, yeah. Or mit.

[D]

Cambridge.

[A]

Yeah. Hogwarts. That's interesting.

[D]

Interesting. You got.

[A]

Your generation would go to Hogwarts. Do you actually think that that's an actual school?

[C]

If you were a wizard, it'd be an actual school.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Would you go if I was. If I got one of the letters?

[A]

Yeah, I'd go, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

If I could.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I feel like a owl wouldn't deliver your. I feel like it would be like a pigeon or something. Yeah. He doesn't even get a full letter. He gets like a post it note.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

He gets one of those right.

[A]

On the eye of a pigeon. It just says, I guess you're invited. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean it knocks its head on your window, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And still I don't think you would go now. Is he here? Okay. But yeah, I think you've been. I think you have a Hogwartsy face as a student.

[D]

Yeah, big time.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Does he not?

[D]

He does.

[E]

Yeah. Absolutely.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. You look like a professor.

[D]

Well, thank you.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Snake or something, you know what I mean?

[C]

Snape.

[D]

I just called him a snake.

[A]

Professor Snape. Professor Snape. Yeah. Like you're not. You're in the Dark Arts.

[D]

I feel like this started positive and it got kind of.

[A]

No, no, no, no. You're not. You. You're not in the Dark Arts. In the Hogwarts universe.

[D]

Yeah, I guess I would be.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Slytherin.

[D]

You're Slytherin.

[A]

You're. No, not Slytherin. He's not white. Yeah, Slytherins are pretty. Are there black Slytherins? I mean in the new one.

[C]

New Snape.

[A]

In the. Yeah, the new Snape is black.

[D]

You think I'd be a dei?

[A]

Yeah, DEI Snape. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

I take it.

[A]

But you're definitely not somebody like, you know, I mean like alchemist teacher. Yeah, yeah, I'm the alchemist teacher.

[D]

And what would I teach you think

[A]

like dark powers, like moving. Transforming a cave into a fucking. Yeah, I mean it's always got a cave.

[C]

Oh,

[A]

so then a big creature, whatever.

[D]

Yeah, okay.

[A]

Like just spells that, you know. I mean wouldn't help anybody certainly. You know what I mean? I mean unless you turn this tree into it. Like, you know, a tractor feels like

[D]

that would be helpful.

[A]

Oh, that's true.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Turn the tree into a nuclear missile.

[C]

Okay, okay.

[A]

I knew it was going to. Yeah, nuclear missile with certain colors on it that represent a certain. We don't country. What about that?

[D]

I.

[A]

Okay, what about that one?

[D]

I'm going to move on from this one.

[E]

Okay.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Why you have a headache all of a sudden?

[C]

I don't know.

[A]

Why are you sweating so?

[C]

I don't know. I was thinking about something.

[A]

Yeah, what were you thinking about?

[C]

I forget.

[A]

Are you scared that the straight of her moose is closed?

[C]

No. I mean, yeah, I guess. I don't know. I don't really.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what, I'm confused.

[C]

Is there literally just like a gate that they closed? How is it closed? Who's closing it? Couldn't you just drive your boat through and it's like, okay, don't do it brother.

[A]

Go behind me.

[D]

Don't get Bobby going.

[A]

Don't get Bobby going. What do you mean don't do it, brother?

[C]

I don't know. There's. I don't know. I don't know is the thesis of my argument.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I know, but do you have Google?

[C]

I think so.

[A]

You don't look it up.

[C]

Well, I don't just spend my time being like, oh, is there a gate at the street of Hormuz?

[A]

Like. Like a gate. He thinks it's like a pearly gates that opens up or like a tol Road. Yeah, yeah. No, it's just a gigantic. I don't know how many miles is it? 15 mile waterway sounds right to me. Yeah. But there's only like 2 miles of actual shipping.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Lane. You know what I mean? Because a lot of the straight of Hermus is shallow.

[D]

Bobby's getting really into the straight home.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

You're tapped in, bro. He's tapped in.

[A]

Yeah. But there's not an actual gate. That'd be the biggest gate ever made.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Only the Chinese could do it. How long. How long is the actual straight in its narrowest passage.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

That's pretty.

[A]

That looks pretty big. Yeah.

[D]

I don't think you can do a gate there.

[A]

I'm going to estimate right now 90 to 104 miles.

[D]

I was going to exactly say that.

[A]

90 miles.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And then the width is varying from 24 to 60 miles. Okay. And what are the shipping lanes with? No one Google shipping lanes with. Okay.

[D]

Come on. This is the most geopolitical.

[C]

Yeah. I was like getting in trouble for not googling it myself.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Two miles.

[A]

That's what I said. Did I not?

[D]

It's pretty.

[A]

Yeah, I did say that.

[D]

Pretty close. Bobby stepped in.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm not tapped in. I just, you know, I just know what's going on a little bit.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I think your generation. What you're. What are you guys doing? Coachella.

[C]

I went to Coachella. We're looks maxing.

[A]

Yeah. You're looks maxing.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You were trying to explain to me that earlier. What is it?

[C]

Yeah. Looks maxing is basically just to mathematically make yourself the most good looking that you can through any means necessary. Any means.

[A]

Are you doing that now?

[C]

I aspire, you know, I'm on my looks maxing journey. As many aspire.

[A]

You are? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

I'm just at the beginning of my journey.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I hope to grow.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you're cute.

[C]

Thank you. I've been looks maxing.

[A]

You've been? No, but I think genetically you're cute.

[C]

Genetics are a big part of it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you don't have to do much on that end.

[C]

No.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah, I guess.

[D]

Is your mom hot?

[A]

Yeah. Who's hot in your family? The dad or mom? Somebody asked to me.

[C]

Yeah, I guess you'd have to ask someone else.

[A]

I don't know. In your opinion? I can say that.

[C]

In your opinion.

[A]

No, I could say this. Okay. That mom, my mom, based on her earlier photos, especially in her 20s, was a pretty lady.

[D]

Yeah, I could see that.

[A]

Her face.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean. Yeah. Body not Great dumpster fire. But the face is good. You know what I mean? So can you. Yeah. Look. Look at my mom.

[D]

Yeah, your mom is very attractive.

[A]

Yeah, she's attractive. Okay, nice. And that's me as a baby.

[D]

She was clearly looks. Maxing.

[A]

Looks. Max.

[E]

Right.

[C]

You can see her jaw. Her jawline there is like a really pronounced. That's good. That's good for looks. Maxing.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

You still kind of look like that, Bobby. That's crazy.

[A]

What are you trying to say, dog? What are you trying to say, dog?

[D]

I'm saying like you, you, I, I. If you showed me that and like not cut your mom out, I would have guessed that was you.

[A]

Yeah. Not Ronnie Chang.

[D]

No, no.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

That's a distinct Bobby Lee right there.

[A]

Okay, you take that off, please. I didn't even know that was on the Internet. So between your parents, who do you think is the most attractive? My mom.

[C]

My mom, I guess a very lovely woman.

[A]

She's a lovely woman.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Are they still together?

[C]

No.

[A]

Okay. Single. Your mom.

[C]

My mom is single. Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

How old is your mom?

[C]

She's older. She's like 60.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

Bobby's out.

[A]

Yeah. What do you mean? I have a girlfriend.

[D]

I know, but even if you didn't, you'd be out.

[A]

That's not true.

[D]

60.

[A]

That's insane.

[D]

You date a 62 year old?

[A]

I did share. I would date Cher.

[C]

Cher's hot.

[A]

Yeah, I think she's hot.

[D]

And she's an icon.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Madonna.

[D]

Ok, you're only, you're literally only celebrity.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

You're only choosing famous.

[A]

What? Yeah, yeah. Who are people in their 60s?

[D]

Okay. Yeah. I mean, these are all gorgeous.

[A]

I want to just tell you right now, Lisa. Right now. Are you in?

[D]

Wait.

[A]

Yeah. In. Wait. I'll just go through the photos. We don't have to say. Okay, out. In. In. Out. Out.

[C]

Out.

[A]

In. Out.

[D]

You're out on Edie Falco.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

That's crazy.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay, here we go.

[D]

Okay. Okay. Okay.

[B]

In.

[A]

Out.

[C]

Out.

[A]

In.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

In. Out.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Out. I think, I think, I think out. Yeah. Oh, in for sure. Out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Out.

[D]

In.

[A]

No.

[D]

Come on, dude. Okay. That's crazy.

[A]

Is that Donald Duck? If that's Donald Duck.

[C]

In.

[A]

How about you? Let's go this row, Luke.

[C]

Okay, but I, I have a girlfriend.

[A]

I know. I have a girlfriend too. This is just older ladies. If you were single.

[D]

Yeah. Dude.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

You're not gonna actually date.

[A]

Go in the row.

[D]

No, Sh.

[C]

What, you don't think I could.

[D]

I think you could.

[A]

All right. All right. Ready? Go. Wait, so where are we starting? I'll do 65. Okay. Go, go, 65. Go. 65.

[C]

Okay. Jane Lynch. She would.

[E]

She would.

[A]

Don't say the names.

[C]

Don't say name.

[D]

Go.

[C]

You don't.

[A]

We'll show the photos on the online.

[C]

Okay. Okay. In. In. In. I guess.

[E]

I guess in.

[D]

I guess is an out.

[C]

Yeah, I say in. In.

[A]

Second row. In.

[C]

In.

[A]

In.

[C]

I would say in.

[A]

In. In. In. All of them. Wait, really quick.

[C]

Third row. In. Wow.

[A]

All the way in. Third row.

[C]

Yeah, dude, I'm all in, honestly.

[A]

Wow. I like this guy. I. I like this guy a lot, dude.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. How about. Well, let's go back to that. Next. The previous page. Ramsey.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Were you in on. On all?

[D]

No. Absolutely not.

[A]

Okay, tell me yours.

[D]

Out.

[A]

In.

[D]

Out. In.

[A]

In.

[F]

In.

[D]

Out. Out.

[A]

Wow. Very good.

[D]

I'm an older man. I'm discerning.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. What is this?

[C]

You just don't dream big enough, bro.

[A]

This is 67. They look great for 67. You look great. Well, I know one of them, so I can't even do that one.

[D]

You've known multiple? No, I've seen few that you knew here.

[A]

All right, so. No, trust me. I only know one of them on this list personally.

[D]

Oh, you mean on this one?

[A]

On this particular list.

[D]

Okay.

[E]

Try this list.

[A]

This is seven year old.

[F]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. I could do this. I could do this perfectly. Yeah, perfectly. Kidding. If you were gay.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. And be honest.

[D]

This is easy.

[A]

This is so easy.

[D]

Incredibly easy.

[A]

In dub.

[D]

Definitely.

[A]

In, out. Yeah, Out.

[E]

Oh,

[A]

just a look. In, out.

[D]

I got it.

[A]

In, out.

[D]

I thought that was a. I give you 90% on that one. How can you be out on William Defoe?

[A]

He just. In the dark. Oh, by lighting. Thinking about in the dark, you know, I mean, you know how your eyes get adjusted to the dark.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And he's. He wants to hook up at 4 in the morning, you're not in, and he's like this close to your face and you wake up, it would freak you out.

[D]

I think, Bobby, that was actually a beautiful case.

[A]

I think you go like that. Oh, William. What's up? Suck my dick.

[B]

Apparently.

[D]

I did not. I did not know I was gonna be turned around so quickly.

[A]

Well, you have to know because we're in a relationship and we're together. You know what I mean?

[D]

I'm picturing the red carpet. William Defoe.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no. You gotta think of regular. No makeup, late night. It is regular clothing.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

You know, morning. Breath. Yeah. Morning breath. Oh, my God. That morning brother goblin, like, right? Just like a goblin.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

All right, so here we. How old? Say. All right, so this is 81. 81. Let's do your list.

[D]

Go, Luke, on this one.

[A]

Oh, my God. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

All right.

[A]

Let's go, Luke.

[C]

Okay, this is if I would make gay. Gay sex with them.

[D]

If you would.

[A]

And in a relationship. With them.

[C]

In a relationship.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Out.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

What do you mean? Wow. Okay. Out. In.

[A]

In.

[C]

Out.

[A]

Yeah. In. Yeah.

[C]

So out.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So out. So out. Last three.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I think that's my list, too.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

How about you, Ramsey?

[D]

I think I'm in.

[A]

There we go.

[B]

In.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

In.

[A]

Yeah, out. Why?

[D]

I think there could be an abuse situation.

[A]

All right, let me just say this right now. Let me just say this right now, please. And you just offended me to the biggest degree.

[D]

I do.

[A]

One can offend.

[D]

I do apologize.

[A]

No.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

All right. He's been sober forever. That's good, right? He's helped more people probably than anyone I ever know. Right. He's a good man. I'm sure he's right. And I think. I think you. I think you said no. Right. And I'm going to say this out loud. I think you. Both of you said now, right. Because of racism.

[C]

You said, I agree with my list, though, after I said it.

[A]

You did say you agree to his list.

[D]

No, he wasn't.

[A]

No, I didn't.

[E]

Let me edit it out.

[A]

I'll edit out what I did say. I didn't even know that was. I thought it was Edward James Almost.

[E]

Oh, really?

[A]

Yeah. How would Edward James almost.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

Go back to telling us how we're racist after you. Confused.

[A]

Okay. Anyway, yeah, but I agree, the last three completely. Out.

[C]

Out.

[A]

You know, I think Michael Douglas, I mean, just a legend.

[D]

Just for the stories.

[A]

The stories. Yeah. The stories of Gary, though.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

I'm with you on Gary, by the way, I might go. Yes, on Gary.

[A]

Yeah. These are too old. Can we go a little younger with the guys?

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

That's 81.

[A]

Let's go to 75. Where's James McCann at? Perfect timing.

[E]

Perfect.

[D]

Thank God. Thank God.

[B]

James.

[E]

Oh, I'm so. Hi, nice to. To meet you. It's good to.

[A]

Hello.

[E]

Am I going here? Yeah, right there.

[A]

We got a water for you.

[E]

Honor and respect is all mine.

[A]

Sit down, please.

[E]

Oh, if I may. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, you may not. You may. I mean, hi.

[D]

My friend Ruby.

[A]

Who is Ruby to you?

[D]

Ruby.

[E]

Ruby is a comedian. She's in the festival. She's dear friend.

[A]

What do you mean? She's different. In what way?

[E]

Oh, dear friend. Sorry, not different.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, dear friend. What does that mean?

[E]

Friends?

[D]

Maybe. Yeah, that they're dear.

[E]

A dear friend.

[A]

Okay. Is it a platonic relationship?

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Thumbs up to you.

[D]

James is a married man.

[A]

Are you really married, James?

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Why is that funny? Your sentence structure. I'm married.

[E]

I don't mind that.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

It's a hard thing in this business to be married. Not a lot.

[A]

Yeah, not a lot. I've never been married.

[D]

Yeah,

[A]

yeah. That's how Koreans. You know, I mean, I. Well, we put in the heart.

[E]

I've seen this.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

I went to a Korean sauna recently for the first time.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

And yeah, I thought it would be an odd sexual vibe. Because of the nudity.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

And it kind of was.

[A]

No, no, no, no, no, no. Look at me right now, dude.

[C]

Y.

[A]

Was it. Cuz I'm a expert in.

[E]

I was a Houston. I was a Houston.

[A]

See, I don't know. The Houston spa. Korean spa scene.

[E]

Very cool with black people. A lot of black people.

[A]

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

The Houston Korean spa in the.

[A]

We spa here in la. Yeah, a lot of black people. A lot of black people, right? And a lot of Korean people. And the Korean men are always like hiding their penis.

[E]

No, the black penises were out and about.

[A]

Yeah, I know. But the Koreans, because of the size differentiation, right? They go, why they do that?

[E]

White.

[A]

So you being a white, this is odd. I feel out of place. So there's two types. I don't know if you like this, Luke.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I can't say this about you. Shopify.

[D]

Shopify.

[A]

Shopify. We use Shopify here on Tiger Belly and we only use the best here. Of course we have our merch and we sell it off of Shopify. And we love it because Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the US from household names like Allbirds, Rothy's, Tiger Belly, Tiger Belly. And also skims to brands. Just getting started. Get started with your own design stores. I love design studios, don't you? You get to do whatever you want with hundreds of ready to use templates. And Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style. What else, Kai?

[B]

Well, and also you can get the word out like you have an actual marketing team behind you. You can easily create email and social media campaigns wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. Best yet though, Shopify is your commerce expert with world class expertise in just from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and beyond.

[C]

Something I really like also about Shopify is that, you know, I might have not a lot of as many fans as you guys. So I need people to learn about my brand and I want people to do that. And Shopify helps me find customers with like easy to run email and social media campaigns.

[B]

Very important.

[C]

So I grow my own brand.

[A]

What's your brand called, dude?

[C]

I don't know, probably called Luke Brand or something. I'm working on the name. That's why I need Shopify to help me. Honestly.

[A]

It's time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com tigerbelly go to shopify.com tigerbelly that's shopify.com tigerbelly oh built. Oh built. B I L T Bill, you guys. Built Bilt started out rewarding members on their rent and that's a fact. Now as of 2026, BILT members can also earn points on mortgage payments wherever they live. That's another. Every housing payment earns you points you can use toward flights with top travel partners like United and Hyatt, Lyft rides, Amazon.com purchases and so much more. Personally, I do redeem my my build credits for gift cards at 120 brands. Dude, for me, 120 brands.

[B]

All of them student loan balances.

[A]

That's what you do?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. Oh my gosh. You didn't go to college?

[B]

I have my degree, sir, in nursing.

[A]

Okay, that's right. My bad. I forgot. And what about you, Luke?

[C]

I think I would use fitness classes. Honestly, I'm trying to get yoked and it'd be nice to be able to earn points.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. You want to get yoked?

[B]

Isn't it so wild that we spent all of the years before this just paying rent and mortgage and it just stops there with nothing in return? I think this is why Built is so cool. It's almost like incentivizes you. You're like excited to pay rent because you get a little something back.

[C]

It's simple. Being a renter and owning a home, it's better with Bilt.

[A]

You're right, man. Join the membership for where you live at. Joinbuilt.combelly that's J O I N B I L T.combelly make sure you use our URL so they know we sent you.

[B]

This is a paid message from GoFundMe.

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

pay for medical expenses. It was 5k to pay the bill for my son and I need only 22 hours. It was amazing. People really trust on GoFundMe. How did Juan raise $5,000 in less than a day? He posted a short video on GoFundMe

[B]

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[A]

30 seconds. Be specific. Be quick and tell what are you going to be using the funds for. I was nervous to do it because it doesn't feel okay to ask money. But you shouldn't be nervous. Sometimes you just have to do it and see the results. We were able to save my son's life thanks to gofundme that we still have my son with us.

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Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's gofundme.com gofundme.com this message reflects one person's

[F]

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[G]

build things online, you know the stack can get messy fast docs in one place, project tracking somewhere else, AI tools scattered everywhere. That's why I've been spending more time in Notion lately. It's become the one workspace where I can actually organize ideas, collaborate with people, and now build on top of it too. Notion just launched their new developer platform and it opens up a ton of possibilities for builders, startups and teams. You can create integrations, connect workflows, build AI powered experiences, and customize Notion in ways that fit how you actually work. What I like is that it doesn't feel overly technical or locked behind enterprise complexity. I was recently experimenting with automating some recurring workflow tasks, and it was surprisingly easy to get something functional up and running without rebuilding my entire system from scratch. That's the sweet spot. Whether you're building internal tools, AI agents, automations, or entirely new products, the Notion Developer platform gives you a flexible foundation to work from. Learn more about Notion's developer platform today at notion.com amp that's all lowercase letters notion.com amp to try notions developer platform today notion.com amp this message is sponsored

[E]

by IQ Bar hey, I'm Will. I started IQ Bar because I couldn't find a protein bar that wasn't loaded with sugar and unpronounceable ingredients, so I decided to make my own. IQ bars are ultra low sugar, packed with protein, fiber and brain boosting nutrients like magnesium and lion's maneuver. And they got zero weird ingredients. And if you've been meaning to try them, now is a great time, because right now you can get 20% off all Iqbar products, plus free shipping when you visit iqbar.com and enter promo code BAR20. Whether you're at your desk, on the road or mid workout, iqbar has functional, clean and delicious options for every occasion. Now you can get 20% off all IQ Bar products, plus free shipping when you visit iqbar.com and enter promo code BAR20. To get 20 off, plus free shipping, go to iqbar.com and enter Promo Code BAR20. That's iqbar.com promo code BAR20.

[A]

So there's two types. I don't know if you like this, Luke. Okay, I can't say this about you because Persians.

[D]

Not Persian, Palestinian, but all right. Kind of on the other side of the whole thing. Are Persians Arabs? No, they're not.

[E]

No, but they're Palestinian.

[D]

Yeah, we're Arabic.

[E]

But there are Arabs who say they're not.

[D]

Yeah, they'll say they're Phoenician or something.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what's that about?

[D]

I don't know. You're gonna have to pick it up with them.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, but what is it about? And we'll deep dive into it. Maybe later. Yeah, yeah, but when I said Persian, I apologize.

[D]

It's okay. Yeah, And I forgive you.

[A]

But I was close.

[C]

Pretty close.

[A]

Dude, was I not close?

[B]

Close?

[A]

You know, I mean, like, when people go, are you Japanese? I don't get offended. I'm like, you're close.

[D]

I think you'd get offended.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Like you're white. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I am. But you're an Australian white. An island white.

[E]

That is true.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

I feel like the minorities in America are nicer to me than they are to the conventional whites.

[A]

Oh, I. I think I agree with you.

[E]

I think I get in easier with black people, etc.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Because of the historical context, I think.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. I think this is James Baldwin going to Paris.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

You're nodding along like you really know what I'm doing.

[C]

Yeah, I get it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we agree. Yeah, I agree with you. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Is that true that people are nicer to James because he's Australian? The. I think I definitely don't experience that as a Traditional white. I don't think I experience that.

[A]

Oh, you don't?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You think that. That you're treated equally amongst all of the imminent immigrant or ethnic groups?

[C]

No.

[A]

You do. So are there ethnic groups that you feel uncomfortable and they treat you differently?

[D]

I'd love to hear this.

[A]

Yeah, we'd love to hear this.

[C]

I guess I might feel out of place, but I let them shine. I go, hey, you guys, this is your. This. Oh, and I'm just here to. I'm a listen and learn.

[A]

Like, shine. Like, put a spotlight. We'll put your tuxedo on. Do a tap dance. Shine.

[C]

No,

[A]

See, they always want them performing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You throw them a basketball. Do something, boss. You're on his side.

[D]

You're looking at me.

[A]

This what you're talking about? Yeah. James gets to meet. Right. We're on the same boat.

[E]

I know where my bridge, but I know how to get.

[D]

Come on.

[A]

Me, too, bro. You do? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

I know where it's buttering, bro.

[A]

All right, dude. What are you looking at?

[E]

I'm looking all around.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a lot to look at. So, James, thanks for having me. Thanks for being here. We can't. I can't wait. And I couldn't wait.

[E]

Well, look, I'm happy to do it. I'm happy to do it. I think Santino's having me on in two. I don't know why I couldn't do the one with you two together. And we save everybody time, but I'm happy to do them separately. I know I gotta work my way up to have you in the same room.

[A]

Well, that's. You know, that's unfortunately. I mean.

[E]

Get kipped.

[A]

No, no, no, no. That's unfortunately the wrong way to think about it.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

You know what I mean? There's two things I wanted to address, the spa thing, but I'll address this first, and then I will go back to the spa because my mind way.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. Number one, we rarely have guests. Okay. Bad friends. Yes. Yeah. Both our podcast, individual podcast are guest driven.

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Right. So that's why you're doing. Probably. Have you done Whiskey Ginger yet?

[E]

I have not.

[A]

But you're doing it soon.

[E]

And I might also say this. There are about. I think it's odd that there are about five podcasts in all of Los Angeles, and between the two of you, you've got three of them.

[A]

Yes. It's a little odd. It's odd. Yeah. Yeah. But what I'm saying to. Once you do both.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And then you'll do. Do you understand?

[E]

Hey, I'm just happy to be here.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. If this is where it sounds like you're not.

[E]

If this is where it ended.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

It would have been. It's never gonna end.

[A]

You and I were never gonna end. Can we go back to the spa?

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

There was a man. Followed me around.

[A]

That's what I was saying.

[E]

There was a cold. There was a hot pool.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Some sort of root in it.

[A]

Explain the root.

[E]

It was some sort of. It was a beautiful smell. It was sort of murky. It helped the back unlock or something. Then there was a cold one. And the man would walk over. He walked forward. Me from the heart into the cold, talking to me. And he would stand up and he would sort of dip his penis. Because it came up to just mid thigh level.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

And while talking to me, hands on hips. He was just dipping his penis.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

Into the cold.

[A]

Yes, yes.

[E]

Talking to me.

[A]

Asian guy, black guy. Oh, white guy, White guy.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

One of the only other whites there.

[A]

Yeah. And he was dipping his.

[B]

You.

[A]

So you've never dipped your penis in

[E]

and out, like, alone would be one thing.

[A]

I see mid conversation in public.

[E]

I did find that to be on you.

[A]

Yeah. That is unusual. It's very friendly, I agree.

[E]

Very friendly.

[A]

Yeah. But I have done my dips, of course, and you got to do about 20, 25 a day. Yeah. Alone.

[D]

Hot or cold water?

[A]

I do both.

[D]

You do both?

[A]

Yeah. Every temperature? Yeah. Yeah. Because I do the. Do the dips to make it stronger.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

It circulates the. Yes.

[E]

What I love is the room afterwards. Is it called the jojoba? I don't know what it was called. It had a special name.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

There was this whole room where apparently you're just. You're just allowed to go and hang out for as long as you want.

[A]

Yeah, that's what it is.

[E]

Fall asleep.

[A]

Yeah. You can sit there.

[E]

And there are people who. They stay there for hours. They spend the night there.

[A]

Yeah, they do.

[E]

This is a high trust.

[A]

It's a high trust situation.

[E]

I love it.

[A]

Well, there's lockers.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

So at the Wii Spa, you can spend the night. There are lockers. There is an area where you can sleep. Right. In fact, all the spas have it in Koreatown and you pay a little extra for, like, overnight stay.

[D]

Interesting.

[A]

Yeah. So it's. It's a good way. You would have had to have a vehicle. And it costs about 60 or $70.

[D]

Okay.

[E]

I mean, that's cheaper than a hotel.

[A]

Yeah. It is cheaper than a hotel. I would rather do that too.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. But well, what I was going to ask you about in terms of spa is me as a free American citizen slash Korean person. Okay. And also just, you know, I'm sort of like a Beatles song.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

If I may say.

[D]

Sure.

[A]

I fly. And so just let me, just let me finish. Okay. I fly. Right. I fly naked. And I. So when I'm at the spa, I go fully nude. Right. And I see a lot of half of the white people, they cover themselves up with a. Either pant shorts or a towel when they're in the steam room in the dry sauna. And I was gonna ask you, what kind are you?

[E]

Oh, I was. Dick out.

[A]

Yes, dick out.

[E]

No, my dear friend, everyone dick out.

[A]

Very important.

[E]

Very important. I could tell that it would be cowardly to cover the penis.

[A]

It's cowardly.

[E]

It draws more attention to your penis than everyone else's by covering it.

[D]

Great point.

[A]

Exactly. Like there's something you're hiding.

[E]

But my friend, my friend Eve lived in Korea. She's a Jewish woman from New York, but she lived in Korea for a long time. She opens for me. She insisted we go whenever there's a Korean spa on the road. She goes, we're going to the Korean spa.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And she goes up. I didn't realize that first of all, the lady, they have an area. But she was telling me in Korea that there will sometimes be a more overt sexual. She said she was once at a Korean spa and there was a very old Korean lady there in Korea pushing up against one of the jets and having orgasm. Yes.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

But this was considered to be a little unusual, but.

[A]

Okay, it's unusual. Well, can I reveal a story to you?

[E]

Please, please.

[A]

My father caught me because my. My parents bathroom, the bathtub, had a strong faucet.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, like it just came out like a waterfall.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Niagara specifically.

[D]

Thank you.

[A]

Okay. And so I. I thought he was at work. And so I was naked. I came home from school and I got naked and it was so powerful that just putting your penis right on it. Right. Would make you erect.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

It felt very good, my friend.

[E]

Of course.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

You're a young boy when you're doing

[A]

14 and you know what I mean?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm discovering sexuality, of course. Yeah. I mean. And there's tingly sensations around there.

[E]

As you know, this is very common, I think for young girls. There are fewer stories. There are fewer stories getting their dick in a faucet.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. And I want to share. Right, yeah, yeah. I'm trying to share the other perspective. Yeah. The other gender also. And so I got fully erect in there, and I would be able to just have an orgasm just by the strength of the faucet water. And then one day I hear a laugh and I turn around. My dad had come home early, and we've. Even. Before his death, we never talked about it. Yeah, I feel like that it was never mentioned, but there was definitely. And my dad saw me with an erection and he goes, go again. Get up. You know what I mean? I took the fucking towel and I ran out of there. And we never discussed it. But anyway, back to the. Our guest, James McCann. Give him a round of applause. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

I'm sure we all have a story like that we can share now.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait. Yeah. Let's go down the line. Luke, do you have. When you coming of age.

[C]

I do have a story, actually. I should. I say.

[D]

Yeah. That's why he asked you, right?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Whoa, whoa.

[D]

Sorry.

[A]

You're a sidekick, too. Sidekicks don't talk to other sidekicks.

[D]

That was. I apologize. I didn't mean that.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think just a side note, right, Your ego's getting in the way.

[D]

Luke is just my good friend. I've known Luke for a while.

[A]

I understand it, but. But just take the ego away.

[D]

You're right.

[A]

You're right.

[D]

I apologize.

[A]

Go ahead, Luke.

[C]

Sorry about that, Luke. Right, And I'm sorry as well.

[A]

No, there's no need to apologize, Luke. This is your first time on the show.

[C]

Affirmative.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're not on the starship Enterprise. I'm not Jean Lucard. I don't know what affirmative means.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. Anyway, great show, by the way. Yes, Go ahead.

[E]

It's not the character I thought you.

[C]

My. My neighbor, when we were in, like. He was in, like, fifth grade. I was in, like, fourth grade or something. He was a little older. We watched Transformers together. The movie. Transformers movie, if you're aware.

[E]

Megan Fox.

[C]

Yeah. And he said, hey, check this out. If you Google Megan Fox naked, it actually comes up on Google.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So then every day we would go to his house and on his family computer, Google, like, Megan Fox naked and kind of just sit next to each other in awe. And then one day, he had a housekeeper who, like, walked up the stairs and she saw us Googling it, and we physically were. She was like, trying to get to the computer, and we were physically, like, restraining her, trying to get her away from it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And she discovered it and told everyone's parents and. Oh, no, it was only brought up at a barbecue once by the dads who said, hey, you know, I get it. Honestly,

[A]

really good. Yeah. Response.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I think it's something that is just better unsaid.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

If I was your father, I would never even bring it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

I mean, it wasn't my naked, direct fenis, but. Yeah.

[A]

Similar kind of story, you know, it's the same kind of embarrassment.

[C]

Yes. Yeah.

[A]

There was an embarrassment there. Yes, there was in Persia. I mean, in. I. I apologize. Yeah, yeah. You know where the dunes are.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I want to say it in a way where I'm not offensive. It feels like, you know where you're going? The barons, you mean of Dune.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How would you explain it?

[D]

You don't have to do this, Jen.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. In Palestine. Yeah, yeah.

[D]

But I grew up here.

[A]

Oh, you grew up here in Orange County. Yeah, that's right. So I don't even have to do anything.

[E]

Do you think this is a problem for the Persians in general is that they're having a revolution? You know, they're trying.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

But then all the people who looked good in bikinis and like, liberal democracy and the Shah and.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

They already came here and they're having a nice time in San Diego.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

Irvine.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Dancing. And they're not. None of them are getting strapped and going back over. Not saying they should. But how long can you have? How long until the people in the country start to resemble that which the regime would want? Cuba, for example, gets rid of everybody with a little upward mobility, a sense of themselves being able to do something. So you actually finally get a communist population.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

I think the people. I mean, North Korea, do. They actually love it. You would know better than I.

[A]

What do you mean that I would know more?

[E]

Well, it's just been going on for so long. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And so. So many people with a personality type who go, this is. I can't tolerate this anymore.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

But people who might love marching. We're just. Over time, the population starts to resemble what the regime wants them to be.

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[E]

I always say.

[A]

Well, that's a very interesting point there. Right. That when you're used to. You know what I mean, Being. It could make life easier, get through

[E]

the first couple of years.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I think it's like, all right, I have to go to this government job. Yeah, right. I know. I'm gonna eat the same meal.

[E]

Same meal.

[A]

Rice, you know what I mean? Some sort of animal, you know what I mean?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't know what animals are up there, you know what I mean? Or some like black, you know, I mean, pigeon or something.

[E]

Okay. Yeah. I don't know what they.

[A]

Have you paused at black. Yeah, no, I did it. I said I was trying to figure out what bird, I mean, a yellow pigeon, that's going to be better for the. You know what I mean?

[D]

It will be.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

Appreciate it.

[A]

And you know, they know, you know, weekends, right. It's going to be maybe a walk through a park.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? And that's the end when you're inundated with technology and Grand Theft Otto and Project Hail Mary.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

You know, and Zinn.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And. And constant, you know, I mean, Celsius. What?

[D]

Celsius.

[A]

Celsius. Energy drink or sugar free Red Bull like I drink. You know what I mean? You know, etc. Etc. You know what I mean? The chalamet. You know what I mean? The whole family is what I meant. You know what I mean? You're inundated with all this stuff, right? Maybe it's a simpler life to just do. And then you have one wife and because there's no porn, of course. So you think that once she shows like even half a titty, right. You're like, oh my God. You know what I mean? Yeah, Right. And it's like the pornography I do worry about. What do you mean, you think they have it in North Korea?

[E]

I mean, I read some story about like they. They went to fight in Ukraine or something to help the Russians and they got the Internet for the first time, the North Koreans. And. Yes. And then the Internet kind of broke because they were just in such huge numbers, going crazy, getting around the corner. That's what I heard.

[A]

That's very interesting.

[E]

Told me that.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Imagine being a North Korean soldier. You're 24 years old. You may never even seen a vagina in your life. Just imagine.

[E]

No, no, no.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want everyone to put. I like what you're doing right now. You're thinking.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Put your eyes up in the sky and think.

[C]

Think.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Everyone think, right? Imagine 24. Never seen any anatomy of a female person. Okay. Then you go to the war. Yes. There's bullets being shot at you. Yes. You're probably not eating a lot, right. Sleeping conditions are bad, but you get free Wi Fi. Okay. Right. And now, you know, I mean, some you, I don't know, can't do A Ukrainian accent, but I'll try.

[G]

Please.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

You need. You must.

[D]

Why are you doing bucks?

[A]

I love I. You must look at the phone hub. You know, Right.

[E]

This is what. It's a record playing backwards.

[A]

You mean check out the phone hub. Right, and then. What is it? Right, and then. Right, Very good. Right, Right. And they go. Yeah, and they go, www.phonehub.com. right, whatever. Right. And then. Yeah. And then they see everything.

[D]

Oh.

[A]

Imagine two girls, one cup.

[D]

They're looking at all the classics.

[A]

Debbie does, Dallas.

[D]

Oh, 100. Yeah.

[E]

These upsets them.

[A]

So North Korean soldiers get Internet access in Ukraine hooked on porn. That's insane. That's absolutely insane.

[D]

I'm actually kind of jealous of them like that they get to experience all that at once, you know?

[A]

No, I'm not. Because it gets taken away when they go home. Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah.

[E]

Have you seen the. Have you seen the. The Egan. He's a comedian who's in Japan at the moment. Who's. Have you seen the clip where he teaches everybody the word guna? Have you seen this clip?

[C]

I'm friends with Eagle.

[E]

You've seen that clip.

[A]

He's gonna stop. Stop. I don't know the word gooner. So I'll tell you something. I'm an Arsenal fan.

[E]

Congratulations.

[A]

Thank you.

[C]

I know where this is going.

[A]

Right. And they call Arsenal fans gooners. And so my cat, his name is Gooner. Right, Right. So all I know is a gooner is a good thing. Right. But I think there's a different definition.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

So. And I've. And. And I swear to God on my mother's life, she's still alive, that I don't know what the other definition is. And I don't even know if I want to know.

[E]

Let's move on.

[A]

No, I want to know. Go ahead. I want to learn and I'm learning today. Go ahead.

[D]

I like this.

[E]

I think it's. It's a young man who spends a lot of time masturbating and thinking about what to masturbate.

[C]

Okay. No, no. It's way more than that.

[E]

Okay. I didn't know.

[A]

He's a younger generation.

[E]

Is it not like. Is it not doom scrolling pornography?

[C]

That's. That. That could be considered modern gooning, but the original.

[E]

The heck are they doing now?

[D]

I like the history of real old school.

[C]

Gooning is when you have multiple screens of porn playing all the time. So you'll have a goon cave people similar to this where we are right now, almost.

[A]

This is not a goon cave.

[C]

It could be, though.

[A]

Why? Why?

[C]

If you had a lot of pornography up and instead of all these.

[E]

He doesn't.

[A]

I don't. But if it did.

[E]

Seems the operative change.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

It's like a separate room where you could create a.

[A]

This could be a museum. If you had Rembrandt and.

[C]

You know what I mean, Picasso on the wall.

[A]

I mean, like, you could go on and on.

[C]

You know what I mean?

[A]

It's like. What the fuck are you talking about?

[D]

This could be a bathroom.

[A]

If you put a toilet. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

And yeah, you basically watch, like, a lot of multiple screens and a lot of a high volume of pornography for a long period of time. So with gooning comes, like, edging you edging yourself where you're masturbating yourself for, you know, hours.

[E]

What happened to just coming?

[A]

I know, I know. How old are you?

[E]

Oh, 30 something.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you won't say that, Dan.

[E]

Oh, I don't actually. I don't know. 35, maybe 35.

[A]

Okay. Maybe 35. Okay.

[E]

36. I don't know.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. You really don't.

[E]

I was born in 91.

[D]

What's the year?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't care.

[E]

It ceased to be.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

A huge part of my life. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. I'm 54.

[E]

Well, I know I would be keeping track then, because.

[A]

Yeah. So I'm 54. And when you turn. Once you turn 50, you start counting the days when people die. You. You go, how old were they when they died?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And then you go, how did they die? And then you kind of, like, do the math. Yeah, yeah. I mean, so I ultimately have maybe 22 years left.

[D]

I think you're gonna live longer than

[A]

that unless AI technology catches up and helps me medically, you know what I mean?

[E]

But has your digestive system.

[A]

I just had a colonoscopy.

[E]

How is it?

[A]

No polyps, no cancer.

[E]

Come on.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm good on that.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I don't know. I haven't checked my breasts or my shoulders or anything like that, but, you know, I mean, I don't know.

[E]

You're relatively slim. Your knees, you can make it up and down these hills. Okay. You go for walks.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah. I can hill walk.

[E]

Yeah. Discovering that now. Yeah, I'm hill walking at the moment.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

It's very special. It's really.

[A]

And it is. Hymns for your hair. Hymns. Hair loss. Hymns for your hair. Finasteride. Minoxidil. You guys. I love him, Tara. And I'll be honest with You. It's thickened my hair.

[B]

I think so too.

[A]

Yeah. Hair loss doesn't fix itself, bud. And earlier you act the better friend makes starting simple with 100% online process chief. And dude, personalized treatment plans delivered straight to you guy.

[B]

And what are the ingredients that matter, Bobby?

[A]

Finasteride and minoxidil. I can memorize it.

[B]

I know.

[A]

And it can stop further hair loss and regrow hair in as little as three to six months. Captain. Bro, bro, I'm telling you right now, you shouldn't even have to go out of your way to feel like yourself. Hims brings expert care straight to you. With 100% online access to personalized treatment plans that put your goals first.

[B]

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[A]

All that's right, punk.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. What else?

[C]

That's true. I just like that you're able to find the right hair regrowth treatment for you. Like I might not have, you know, complete baldness, but I have some thinning here and there. So I go, okay, I need a flexible subscription option and luckily for me, I have access to 24, 7 provider support and once a day treatment.

[B]

And they can be like, Luke, you know what? It's you're okay up front, but you're a little spotty up back here. Right?

[C]

Okay. Or not. Or maybe it's something else, but yeah,

[A]

someone's been looking at the back of your head. I've been staring at it for years now.

[C]

Well, luckily for me, I can. I can fix that.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. Thank you. For simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, weight loss and more, visit hims.combelly that's hims.combelly for your free online visit hims.combelly Featured products include compounded drug products which the FDA does not approve or verify for safety, effectiveness or quality. Prescription required. See website for full details, restrictions and important safety information. Individual results may vary based on studies of topical and oral minoxidil and finasteride. I like that one. You like it? Oh. Before we dive back into today's episode, great news for the comedy TV fans. Every episode of the Hulu original series Alice and Steve is streaming on Hulu. From the producers of Baby Reindeer comes a new edgy comedy. Lifelong best friends Alice and Steve see their world implode when Steve starts dating Alice's 26 year old year old daughter. Uh oh. The once rock solid friendship turns sour as Alice tries to sabotage their romance and Steve attempts to salvage their friendship, leading to hilarious hijinks and chaos. A fiasco per se. This unique comedy that can only be described as the first rom com proves that sometimes best friends make the best enemies.

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[D]

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[A]

really like when you conquer a hill. How does it feel?

[E]

I'd say that all these people would say that LA has gone to the dogs and blah blah blah.

[A]

Listen yeah.

[E]

Hollywood Hills are quite nice.

[A]

Oh, they are very nice.

[E]

They're pretty nice.

[A]

It is nice. It is.

[E]

I really short of that Charles Manson stuff.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

And the threat of bushfires.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

I see a lot of happy, rich, nice people.

[A]

Yeah. Yes. It's a very nice neighborhood.

[E]

I don't know what's happening down in the plains and I don't much care to.

[A]

Yeah. When you say plains, what do you mean?

[E]

The. The greater flat.

[A]

Los Angeles flat, where those movies came. Yeah, Yeah. I mean, like color.

[E]

I didn't know it was called.

[A]

Or cold.

[E]

Skid. That's its real name.

[A]

Skid Row.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

I thought that was a derogatory expression. They actually called it.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

Skid Row.

[A]

Yeah. Have you been there?

[E]

No. I realized I came very close because I was at Union Station and then we went to a Chinatown and I just missed it. But I'd like to go.

[A]

There's a Chinatown and a little Japan town there.

[E]

I saw little Japan.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

And I tell you what, I didn't. A lot of Mexicans, I think they're lying.

[A]

I think they're lying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it. You know what? It drives me crazy. And when people are like, from out of the state. Look at la.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, I mean, it's in the dirt and they just show Skid Row and I'm like, yeah, I've never even been there. Like, I. I wouldn't even be able to even know, like, if somebody was like, hey, let's go check out Skid Row. I wouldn't be able to even tell them where to go, really, specifically.

[E]

It makes people feel really good to talk. Not that there aren't things to talk down about la.

[A]

But. Yeah.

[E]

People would always tell me Malibu was on fire. Yeah, it's all been destroyed. I went to Malibu.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Some things got destroyed. It's still a really nice place.

[A]

It's a nice place. It's a nice place.

[E]

I have a fish and chip shop there. It was world class.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

I bought the hoodie.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

I rented a boogie board. A bodyboard.

[A]

Yeah, I know what that is.

[E]

I had a great time.

[A]

I'm from Southern California. I know what bodyboarding is.

[C]

I love it.

[A]

That you loved it.

[E]

Yeah. Also San Diego. Magnificent.

[A]

You know, you seem like a. And I don't want you to take off offense to this. You. I mean, I get ready. F. No, I wouldn't get ready. And. And, and it's not an offensive thing. I think it's a good thing. Right. But you look like a Peter Jackson White. Like a creative. You know what I mean? A really talented.

[E]

Thinking about shaving it all off.

[A]

No, no, no, no, no, don't.

[E]

It might be time.

[A]

No, no, no. You look like a director.

[D]

Yeah, I see.

[A]

You look like a director. You look like you. You're a very creative person.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You look like you're. I've never met you before. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You seem introspective and you seem brighter than shane and brighter. McCusker and I believe.

[E]

Now I know that's why we.

[A]

No, no, no, no. Just in.

[E]

No.

[A]

They'll pop off.

[E]

You'll start a war. You'll say something about Austin. You'll make me defend Austin. I know what I've been brought into now. Start with a compliment. Start with all positive. Let's talk about the hot springs. No war.

[A]

No war.

[G]

No war. No war.

[E]

I come here, say nice Angeles.

[A]

I was getting your grade.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

You're a wonderful person. You're a wonderful and very talented person. That's all I'm trying to say. I'm not starting a war. I love all those guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I think that Gillis. Now I get it. Gillis, you and McCusker, you guys pot together.

[E]

We have potted.

[A]

You have potted together.

[E]

I've been on podcasts with them.

[A]

A. Are you a regular on that podcast?

[E]

I don't. I wouldn't. I don't regular. I've done it five or six. I've enjoyed doing it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

I like doing it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I would say I've seen.

[E]

I'm in that universe.

[A]

You're in that universe.

[E]

Cinematic universe.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're in the. If it was a marvel, that's how this country.

[E]

I've realized that's how this. It's all tribes and clans, and it's very. It's interesting. I'm very happy to be here. Very. I feel blessed to be brought in.

[C]

Just Australia.

[E]

But it's very. I see everything is.

[A]

What you're saying. I see you were saying everything is tri.

[E]

And there's this guy and that.

[A]

It's Marvel versus dc, you know? Yes, yes.

[D]

It's.

[E]

You know, in the NFL, they have, you know, coaching trees.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

I see this with people's openers and.

[A]

Yeah. Yes.

[E]

Oh, he's a soda guy.

[A]

That's part of the soda. Yes.

[E]

The soda lineage.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

Crime families.

[A]

Crime families.

[E]

There's the Burr people and the Louis people. They're not the same people.

[A]

They're not the same People, I'm looking on the ad.

[E]

I think it's all one big happy. No, no, very discreet.

[A]

Yeah. But there are treasonous folks.

[C]

Folk.

[E]

Absolutely.

[A]

Yeah. There's treasonous folk, and there are also kings and emperors and there's also peasants. Right. And there's also. It's. It's very. Games of Thronesy. Okay. But at the end of the day, all hail to the king.

[D]

Yeah, absolutely.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

Who is.

[A]

You know. Yeah, yeah. All hail to the king. For now.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. And so I'm just Bobby Hu.

[D]

Akbar.

[A]

No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm just a little. You know what I mean? I have. I. I'm in charge of a little village. I am, you know, off the coast. You know what I mean? I hear the rumblings what happens in the kingdom. Right. But it's none of my business.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. And I know who play what.

[E]

You're in the hermit kingdom over here.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I'm in the hermit kingdom. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm still a part of the royal class. Okay. And so are you.

[E]

I mean, how much of it comes down to a New York, Louisiana divide to begin with? Because Austin is definitely a break off of the LA thing and New York

[A]

thing a little bit too.

[E]

People have dribbled out.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

New York. But overwhelmingly, it's. It's an LA in la.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, in Game of Thrones. Have you seen the show?

[E]

Isn't it? Yes, but it disappeared from a cultural imagination real quickly.

[A]

Not from Bobby's, not from mine. I talk about every week. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I still talk about Lord of the Rings. What are you gonna do?

[E]

Really Came.

[A]

What?

[E]

When is winter? I thought that was going to be a big thing.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, so everyone.

[E]

Winter's coming.

[A]

Oh, so you're saying the Austin people are the White Walkers?

[E]

It's not what I'm.

[A]

Is that what you're saying?

[E]

Potentially the homeless. Yeah, yeah. I don't know where I would put them.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Might be dawn.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. But there's three Empire.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you think.

[E]

Well, I mean, what are we calling Nashville? Is that the sort of. That's the sea. People who drown it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think they are. Because there are people there.

[E]

They're big names.

[A]

They're big. They're big names. Big national names, but not a threat.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

They have to join alliances.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Or they think.

[D]

Exactly.

[A]

Don't you think?

[D]

They couldn't stand on their own.

[A]

They can't stand on their own. They can't win the War.

[E]

Vanderbilt being their team is interesting. Interesting. You know.

[A]

What does that mean?

[E]

Always sort of in the conversation. Never going all the way.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what Vanderbilt means.

[E]

Football team. They all wear the V. Yeah. You see them always with a V.

[A]

Theo always with the V. Oh, I see.

[E]

It's it. But it's all. I mean, I like Nashville a lot.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And they're doing it. They're trying, you know, and why not? Low tax, nice place to live.

[A]

Have you thought. I thought about moving there.

[C]

Really?

[A]

Andrew. Have thought about moving to three different places.

[D]

Nashville.

[A]

Austin was one of them.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Vegas was one of them. I think Phoenix and then a Nashville, too. So there's four. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Like literally buying houses and moving out of la.

[D]

Can't see you in Nashville.

[A]

Why?

[D]

Just a race thing, I guess. I don't know if there's a lot of Asians.

[A]

That's incredible that you're. Yeah.

[D]

I just didn't know.

[A]

On the boat again. I'm fishing on the boat again. What do you think of that?

[D]

Good.

[A]

I'm a rice boy. Cowboy.

[D]

I like it.

[A]

I mean, I would be a hit. You'd be a huge hit in Nashville.

[E]

We got a big Asian population in Australia and we had, you know, we had Australian Idol. You've got American Idol. I know that's really American Idol, though. You would have. They would have the goofy person this. The silly person who's never really going to make it through.

[A]

Right. The William Hong would be like a big.

[E]

Yes. But we had so many Asian people who were making their dream come true.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Were they good? No, some of them.

[E]

Some of them. The first winner of the first season was Guy Sebastian.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

Asian fella.

[A]

Asian fell.

[E]

But have you seen.

[A]

I feel like

[E]

there's someone in. I think a Philippines version of. It's like Philippines out. Ken Lee.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen that.

[E]

So beautiful.

[A]

But the Philippines per capita have the best singers.

[E]

Okay.

[D]

Sounds right.

[E]

The Welsh would be furious with that.

[A]

I know, but I'm telling you right now, have you seen why there's eight

[E]

Welsh people and they're all Tom Jones.

[A]

Oh, that's right. That's right. That's right.

[E]

Yeah. You think the Philippines.

[A]

The Philippines per capita. Are the most talented. Gilbert.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Are the most talented people. Interesting I've ever seen in my life. It's just. There's just no way to make it.

[D]

Sure.

[A]

Right. Because it's so impoverished there in sections. Yeah. You know, I mean. And I've been there many times. I Love the islands.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm one of them. If, if I may say, you know what I mean?

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Because I had sex with one for 10 years.

[D]

Sure.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So that gets you cred. That gives me a lot of credit.

[C]

You become one.

[A]

I know the smells. I know that you know. Yeah. I mean textures. Yeah, you know what I mean? Skin textures, you know, I mean food, etc. Etc. Okay, et we just et'd.

[E]

It loves a touch.

[A]

What?

[E]

I love touching. But you say the most talented in the world.

[A]

I would have, I would argue yes, because I've been there. And every time I'm there, I do the Bobby Lee talent show. I've done it twice.

[E]

You get to do shows in the Philippines?

[A]

No, what I do is this. I go, I'm in town and I'm gonna do a talent show. Singing, dancing, that's me.

[E]

That's in the Philippines.

[A]

That's in the Philippines. He wears a full suit. I wear a full suit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ye, yeah. The top Bobby Lee's talent extravaganza, right? And invite the whole island to compete. And every. It gets packed.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And people are doing all kinds, lighting themselves on fire. Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Crazy.

[A]

Crazy. The craziest acts you've ever seen.

[E]

What do they record it?

[A]

I do record them. Yeah, Yeah. I don't put them online, but they're just for me. What, you watch them?

[D]

What, you just watch them at home by yourself?

[A]

No, I just like to watch talent from all over the world, you know what I mean? Because I'm a man of the people.

[E]

But you would only do it in the Philippines.

[A]

Yeah, I only do it. Yeah. On one island, Cebu.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. And they all come out and they. Oh my God. One guy took, put baby powder in his mouth and blew them and put shapes. Oh, that's with baby powder. Which I never thought you could even do.

[E]

You look so sad.

[A]

Yeah, because I'm sad when I'm there. It's a lot of stress because I'm like, is anyone going to compete? Is anyone coming?

[D]

Sure.

[A]

I take it personally. And people cry when they lose.

[E]

Like teams.

[A]

Yeah, people like Dan's crews, they cry when they lose.

[E]

This is a show.

[A]

What do you mean?

[E]

This is a. That said you gotta get that.

[A]

I taped it as a show. I tried to pitch it and no one bought it. What's so funny?

[C]

Oh, I don't know. I don't know. I, I, I think that's. People should have bought it.

[D]

Bobby, what do they win? Sorry.

[A]

What the fuck do you mean, dude?

[C]

No, I'm.

[A]

I'm. Let's just say this, okay, James, you know this. You take a big risk. You fly all the way over there, you get the camera people, you tape it, you cut it together and you. You go to all the networks, Netflix, everyone, you pitch it and they all say no. And I call that trying.

[C]

Yeah, you did a good. That's a good.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

What the fuck have you ever done?

[A]

Okay. That's what it's called.

[E]

Maybe concert movie. You get that into a 90 minute version.

[A]

A concert.

[E]

I'll get that out to Khan.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

South by Southwest.

[A]

That might really maybe film it myself.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

You attach James as the director.

[E]

No, no, visually, I see what you're saying. Not a skill that I have.

[A]

Is that a skill you have?

[E]

But we'll find out.

[A]

Yeah, I think you do. Just based on your look.

[E]

I worry.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. On your look.

[E]

I worry that you need a level of attentiveness to the wreck.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Do you like film?

[E]

Yes, I do.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

I just found out that Quentin Tarantino has a cinema here.

[A]

Yeah, he does.

[E]

I just found out.

[A]

Yeah, he does have a cinema. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's wonderful. Los Feliz, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

We were just there.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

It's not. There are so many Australians in Los Feliz. There are beautiful jacaranda trees.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's up with. Can I. Let me ask you something. What's up with the didgeridoo?

[D]

Thank you.

[E]

If a woman.

[A]

I've always. I've always.

[E]

Women aren't to play it. It makes them barren, apparently.

[A]

Oh. Oh. Because of all the wind that you must use out of your body to get that thing to.

[E]

I don't know. The deep. I don't know. The fine detail.

[A]

I know that's real good, but I've never heard the dis redo and went that I'm gonna. You have like start a band and have a guy be the jack.

[E]

Oh, no, there's some good ones. There's some good dig tracks out there.

[A]

And that's why I wanted you on here. Why?

[E]

Treating Yothu Yindi. I think there's a dig in that. Gee, I'd hope so.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

Sometimes when you're just.

[A]

It's Celtic.

[E]

It's a primal when it comes in.

[A]

Tell me how you feel.

[E]

A deep. It's not used as much in Australia because people get offended and fucking whatever, but I would.

[A]

Why. Why would they get.

[E]

You know.

[A]

They what? Yeah, no, I don't know. I Don't know. I don't know about the region. Tell me.

[E]

Aboriginal people. People get very, you know, Very, you know. What are you doing with that? Didgeridoo. That sort of thing. That's how.

[A]

Oh. When the white people do the desiree.

[E]

Yeah, right.

[A]

Didgeridoo. Yeah. The aborigines get offended.

[E]

Well, even saying aborigine, that people get.

[A]

What do you call. What would I call that? You.

[E]

Them so fun. Aboriginal.

[A]

Aboriginal people.

[E]

Explain to me.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Why that's. One's fine and one's not.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

You can't do it.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

I don't know.

[A]

Yeah, I don't know either. And something that. Well, maybe I chatgpt or something we could discover.

[E]

Yeah. I spent hours arguing with chat GPT about Aboriginal people, you know.

[B]

Ow.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Friends with any Aboriginal people?

[E]

Yes, I am.

[A]

Yeah, I bet you are.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Hello, Craig. Hello, Craig and others.

[A]

Yeah. What's up with the quokka?

[D]

Okay.

[E]

Only in Western Australia.

[A]

Yeah, I've seen it.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Live. What's up with it?

[E]

I. I've been to Western Australia a lot of times. I've never made it out to see quokka. I never went to the island.

[A]

That's insane.

[E]

I never did.

[A]

I went.

[E]

I did the gigs. I went home.

[A]

Oh, no. I went to the quokka.

[E]

How was it?

[A]

And let me tell you about the quokka.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Cute. I mean, that's. You know what a quokka is?

[C]

It's the part of the bird where they pee and poop out of the same hole.

[A]

What? I've never even heard that of that. No, no, it's an animal.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

That's a cloaca.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. This is a quokka. Yeah.

[E]

Cute.

[D]

Oh.

[C]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[A]

You know.

[C]

Yeah. There's a resemblance there.

[A]

Of what?

[C]

It kind of looks like you. Honestly, it has your animal.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

That was bold that you said that. I'm cute.

[C]

I'm sorry.

[A]

Yeah, no, it's cute. Yeah, look.

[C]

That's good.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

No, they love them over there.

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

And I have to say, out of all the creatures I've met on Earth, that's my favorite one.

[C]

That's a good one.

[D]

Pretty beautiful.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

If it's unbelievable to me as an Australian that you've not gone to the island to see the most friendliest creature

[E]

on planet Earth, everybody else always got to do it. But I would pass the dates, would never line up. I'd be there for the fest when they go on, you know, on Sunday we're going out, I go. I'm flying out Sunday morning.

[A]

Oh. So what part of Australia are you from?

[E]

I'm from Adelaide. Oh, Adelaide at the bottom. We don't have a good concert hall for people.

[A]

I played it.

[E]

We had the entertainment center.

[A]

Yeah, we did that.

[E]

I think it's acoustically rough.

[A]

It was.

[E]

No disrespect, but it's rough again.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

The Theban theater, which is 2000. That's the biggest, best one we've got.

[A]

That's the one we did.

[E]

That's a. That's better.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

But, boy, we could use this Hollywood. This Hollywood Bowl. Yeah, we have a Hollywood Bowl.

[A]

Yeah, but Greek.

[E]

Build it into the hills. Cause we got the hills. I find the LA hills really remarkable.

[A]

But how did you start comedy in Adelaide?

[E]

Well, you said, you know, there's open mics. You don't start out in the 2000. You would know this about comedy. You know this. It takes time.

[A]

But there are open mics. They're open.

[E]

They're open mics.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

But no, I was there for.

[A]

But what is the scene in Adelaide? I'm sorry, because I don't know about it.

[E]

Please, please. Yeah.

[A]

May I?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, good.

[E]

What question would you like to ask?

[A]

I would love to ask a question

[E]

I would like to hear.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is it as brutal as it is? Because I know you. Did you start here.

[C]

I started Orange county, but.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you started here. Yeah, yeah. It's brutal.

[D]

The worst.

[A]

It's competitive.

[D]

There's no audiences.

[A]

No audiences.

[D]

Zillion comedians.

[A]

Brutal.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

That's what I. Because I started in San Diego for three years. A little better, but still kind of brutal.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Is it brutal in Adelaide?

[E]

There's always room to play in a greater extent. I felt then you could go out to the biggest cities, but I found this about San Diego. I thought this because I thought. I thought who Derek Poston was from San Diego and Hassan Ahmad was a San Diego Ian.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And. And yourself. And I thought for where it is geographically, that must be one of the best cedar cities in America for comedy. Because you go off to la, you try and make it.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

When it's hard in la.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

You know, rather than going it. I'm moving back to Ohio. You just go. I'll go see mum for the weekend.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Drive down to San Diego, swim. Well, I'll try again next time.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

There's not a. Make it. You can just. Just didn't go back, hang out, catch the train. Beautiful train.

[A]

Yeah. Beautiful.

[D]

Beautiful train.

[C]

And

[E]

Adelaide was Good. We got a big fringe festival, so that was nice. There was a lot of stage time during the festival.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

And then difficult the rest of the year to get everybody else in.

[A]

But yeah, yeah.

[E]

I think it's also. It suffers from the same thing that every, you know, million to 2 million city gets with a comedy scene is it gets really, really good. There's like 15, 20 people who are doing great. They all go. And then it fucking crashes.

[A]

But then there's a new generation.

[E]

There's a new generation. But now with the Internet, you know, people aren't doing the comedy circuit as much.

[A]

Wow.

[E]

They just go and they do that well. Or they bring their own openness. You know, it used to be a thing. There was a guy come to town and everyone would get to open for him.

[A]

Oh, wow. Yeah.

[E]

I mean, I'm a part of that problem. I don't like working with the people from.

[A]

My problem with it is, is that, you know, I want, you know, I mean like minded openers. Okay. So I bring this guy, you know, I mean, and I bring.

[D]

Appreciate it.

[A]

Cat, bird. I brought him once, right? Yeah. So it's like, I know them, I can hang out with them.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Because what happens. Because I was at a point for like maybe 12 years where I had couldn't afford to bring an opener, so that had to go to a town and there'd be two locals opening for me. And that's when. You know what I mean? It wasn't that fun because sometimes you'll just have a guy like this one mc. I was in Houston and he. His first line to me was. I think I've said this before. His first line to me was, yo, I'm not going to tell you, like, interesting. Okay, yeah, we got the yo. This is what he said. But he's not necessarily. Yeah, what you think he is.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

God, he's a yo, bro. Hey, what's up? What's up? I go, what's going on? He's like, yeah, yeah. I be like, I be like, I'm headliner.

[G]

Uhhuh.

[A]

I go, oh, you're a headliner? Yeah, but I don't even know why I'm open for you.

[D]

That's crazy.

[A]

That's his opening line. And I go, oh, well then why did you do it? Time's tough. You know what I mean? You go, but I headliner. I go, why? What do I care?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Just do the host, right? He does 40 minutes up front and it's all the dirtiest jokes ever. Right. So then after the show, I came up to him. I go, yo, what's up, man? Because, you know, I'm.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Regular, you know, whatever. You know what I mean? He's like, what? What? I go, I mean, you're supposed to do 10, 15 minutes up front, and it's a little too dirty. And he goes, ah, right. And I go, second show, he goes dirtier and he does longer. Ooh, this is Friday night. Right at the end of the second show, I walk right up to him. I go, you're fired.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And he couldn't believe it.

[E]

He couldn't believe it.

[A]

No, he couldn't. No. Because it's like, at that time, I wasn't a name. I was kind of climbing up.

[D]

Sure.

[A]

You know what I mean? But still, I just went up to the manager. I go, I can't have a host doing. You know what I mean? Dirty jokes, you know, 40 minutes up front.

[E]

And that man was Patrice.

[A]

If it was Patrice, I would go, you close? Yeah, yeah. I'll open and I'll do 10 minutes. You know what I mean? What are you talking about? You know what I mean? You're a legend. You know what I mean? This guy had.

[E]

It's insane. No, it's insane. It's insane because also, they give you the most senior guy in the team. What you want is not the guy who's been doing it for 15 years. That's full of hate and despair. You want someone coming up who's gonna do something else with their life, but they don't give it to that guy. They give it to the guy who goes, I've seen a lot of guys come through here.

[A]

Yeah. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's the. You guys don't know this particularly, but I think James and I know, right? Is that in every city, in every town, there are people that have been doing comedy for 20 plus years and they never moved.

[D]

Sure.

[A]

Right. And these are the ones that open for you, Right? And there's a bitterness. Yeah, Right. Like, I shouldn't be here. I don't give a. About this. You know what I mean?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

There's They. I had one guy introduce me as Billy Lee. Like, he didn't even bother to memorize my name. Yo, man. Billy Lee.

[C]

A lot of yo.

[D]

Yo.

[C]

A lot of yo. Every guy.

[D]

What do you mean?

[E]

It's a lot.

[D]

Seems like.

[A]

No, I'm sorry. Let me do it again. Do British accent.

[D]

Do British.

[C]

Hello. Oh, nice.

[A]

Audience, please welcome Bob Lie. You know what I mean? So is that better?

[D]

Yeah. I think.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I come out. Oh, no. I said, bobby Le. Please welcome Bella Lynn. Yeah, right. And I'm. And then I have to go up on stage. My name is Bobby.

[D]

It's not good.

[A]

It's not good. It's not good already.

[E]

You're.

[A]

You're in the weeds.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

When you have to say, my name is actually Bob in that line, you're

[E]

already in the weeds.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

You're. You're. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Over and over again.

[A]

Over and over again. Yeah. So now we bring our own. You bring your own.

[E]

I try. Also, I find it very lonely on the road.

[A]

God. God bless you. Yeah.

[E]

It's nice to have people there with me to keep it going. But I. I think a lot. I think the other thing that dooms people is they actually make good money doing comedy. These people who've done it for 20 years because they've got all the local corporates stitched up. They do all the Christmas parties. They do work functions. No, not here.

[A]

I agree.

[E]

I know these people.

[A]

I agree. But I'm shaking my head and I'll tell you why. But keep.

[E]

No tell. But I think that. What now tell me.

[A]

No, no, keep going.

[D]

He has a philosophical disagreement, I believe.

[A]

Thank you.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, keep going, Bobby.

[E]

But I must now know.

[A]

I understand that you didn't finish your thought, though.

[G]

Start over.

[E]

There's a sense of entitlement that people have. No.

[A]

Yes, yes.

[E]

Yeah, but no, but they're making big money from doing comic. I always thought. I always wanted to get on the cruise ships. I always wanted to be on the cruise ships. I always wanted to because I was this part until quite late in the career. I was like 15, 16 years in. I was just in my little town. I tried moving away. I had to keep moving back over and over again, and still I did. I did, like, one Christmas party and it went so badly, I never got another one. They still gave me the money, but the cheapest chips would never book me again.

[A]

I'll tell you. I was shaking my head. I'll tell you why.

[E]

Okay, thanks.

[A]

If I may. If I may. Okay, okay. When I started, they were like, yeah, you got to clean up your act. You know what I mean? You got to do jokes that, like, are more. You know what I mean? Meat and potatoes, right? You got, you know, like about driving or, you know, I mean, dating. What's going on with the airplanes, you know what I mean? And you have to dress better because I used to dress like this and messed up hair. You Know what I mean? Up. I would say, really crazy on stage, wouldn't get a laugh necessarily, but it was just like really nut shit, you know what I mean?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And people would go, you're never going to get corporate gigs. You're never going to be on cruise ships, you're never going to do the road. You're never going to make it with that act. And I always thought said, but I'm being myself.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? And, and, and I, you know, because you have to do a lot of, like, you have to pretend that you're a comedian more than finding your own point of view and being essentially yourself. Right. So you kind of have to like clean up your act, wear certain. A specific thing. Right. To only talk about things that everyone, you know what I mean, Will relate to. And I think that hinders comedy. So, yes, there's corporate comics in these towns that like, if a convention comes through, but their jokes are very generic about family or. Yeah, very generic jokes about driving and

[D]

the freeway around that town, you know?

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They have local references and it, it's. I, I don't think that that's what comedy's about.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

I think comedy is about, like, you. I've never seen anyone that looks like you. I've never seen anyone like you. Right. I've never seen anyone do comedy like you. Right. You were in. You are who you are. Okay. And I think I was the same way. So that's why I've never done a corporate.

[D]

Your whole career, you never did one corporate.

[A]

I think I did one and they lit me right away. I mean, and they were like, get him off. You know, I mean, it was like one of those things. And I, you know, I, I did maybe seven colleges and they're like, no, it's. He's too wild.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

For the kids.

[D]

I could see that.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I would do crazy shit, you know what I mean? Just running around the whole thing. You know what I mean? Yeah. And they'd be like, you want to,

[E]

you know, a part of you start, goes, I'd like to do well for these people. I could never. One still wants to do well for these people. But I would try and do it and I would realize I didn't have the. I did a. I did a gig for a supermarket company on their special golf day and I, you know, it was their special golf day. They said, get up to 10 minutes.

[A]

What do you mean, special golf day?

[E]

They all went out and played golf with the people who supplied the supermarket.

[A]

Okay, okay. Oh, it's special.

[E]

Yeah, Special Golf day. And they said, here's the comedian. I think I used the word three times in the first minute.

[D]

Are you on a golf course?

[E]

They had come in from the golf course to watch me say something about someone getting to death. What the fuck am I doing?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. All the lights are on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The lights are on. People are eating. It's not the right amount. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a nightmare. You know what I mean? So what I would say to a young man like this. How long you been doing comedy?

[C]

Four and a half years.

[A]

Four and a half years, right. Still developing, you would say?

[C]

Yes. Yeah. Still developing, are you? Yeah, I say it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. You know, it's so funny. From afar, sometimes you look Asian.

[C]

I've gotten that a lot.

[A]

Yeah. Right now. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Like right now, people say it. I have squinty eyes, if I may say.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you're dating a Korean.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. An Asian person. Yeah, yeah. She's half. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you afraid of full.

[C]

Oh, afraid of full Asian capital. A Asian. No, I'm not afraid, no.

[A]

Okay, fair question.

[C]

Yeah. No and fair answer. No fear.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

The Koreans have maybe the least Asian archetypal personality.

[A]

What do you mean?

[E]

There is. There is.

[D]

I agree with you.

[E]

I think.

[A]

What do you mean?

[E]

I think of Christopher Sheen from Perth. I think of other Koreans I've met in my time.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

There is masculinity and just a constant threat of violence in a very American way. Yeah. They're Christian, I think they call this Han huting huiting.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Very lives large in the. You know, of all the Asiatic regions, gender politics may be the worst there. Women not happy to be submissive and they take themselves out of the sex market. And the birth rate is, I think, the worst in the world.

[A]

In South Korea. Yeah.

[E]

South Korea. There's something in Korea that is really. People think of Japan as being the most alien and, like, interested.

[A]

But yeah.

[E]

Yeah, boy, the Korea. There's something happening.

[A]

I'll tell you an interesting thing.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

If I may.

[E]

Please.

[A]

Okay. Even other Asians don't like me. Yeah. Of other Asian regions, they find me to be. What's the word? Unflavorable.

[D]

Yeah. Unpalatable.

[A]

Unpalatable. I can't say the word. Yeah.

[D]

But I agree.

[A]

You agree?

[D]

Well, I mean, I've seen it.

[E]

I don't agree.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

But I know what you're talking about. I have similar things.

[A]

I mean, you know, there was. I don't want to re. I. You know, I've been potting for a long time, so sometimes I re. Reiterate certain stories.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

I had this famous Asian actor once, pulled me aside at the Comedy Store, and he goes. He had an accent. Yeah, Let me talk to you outside. And I go, okay. He goes, oh, you're disgraced. And I go, what do you mean? He's like, go to Asia, everybody. And I go, why all the thing you say? And I go, what the fuck you talk about? You back up. Because I get.

[E]

That's really the sort of thing he might have had a problem with.

[A]

Oh, you think?

[E]

That was the thing I started. I started out with Ronnie Chiang.

[A]

I love him.

[E]

Great.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

But suit dignity.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Tonight show.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

I've been reading the news.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

I was in a. You know, it's very. I have my law degree.

[A]

Yes. Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Disciplined in martial arts.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

The d. Very heavy get around.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm. If I was back in the day, right. I would be, you know, I mean, with the rice on the head.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[E]

The coolie.

[A]

Yeah. Just shuffling through a village. You know what I mean? Right.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Dropping it off. Right. And then probably in some. Well, you know, I mean, like, I would face really dirty dude. Yeah, yeah. I would, like, maybe have some sort of slight leprosy. You know what I mean? Right, right. People would call me the town, you know? I mean. Yeah, yeah. And I think that I'm one. When I was a kid, I never wanted to do comedy until I saw Margaret Chow on hbo. And she's Korean, and I'd seen other Asians, you know, I mean, like Johnny Yoon or other people to my Yatsuki and stuff like that. But back in the day, she was the first person I was like, oh, I think maybe I can do comedy because she's Korean. And you can tell she's Korean because she can. She goes to the edges of things. You know what I mean?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? And I thought, oh, you could go to that edge of things. And I think then, oh, maybe I can. Because when you're watching just a Seinfeld growing up as a Korean boy, what? You're like, oh, there's no way I could do that because he's in a suit, he's talking, you know, I mean, what's up with that?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, I mean, I'm like, I don't understand. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then, you know, you need. You know, I think Koreans, especially in comedy, are the. A little wilder, I think. Yeah, I think so. Like, Hans Kim, for instance, is an extreme example.

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

Of that. Of just some. Something wrong.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

There's something wrong with us, and I think it's the Japanese oppression of 50 years.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You mean we were tortured and pillaged and, you know, I mean, destroyed. You know, I mean, and. And we. My parent generation lived through that and they. It's generational trauma and it's just the way we are.

[G]

We're.

[A]

You know what I mean? We're really into revenge.

[E]

There was something happening before then, though, because in the medieval era, those hats, the Korean hats.

[A]

No, no, no. Tell me about the hats.

[E]

You know about the Korean.

[A]

No, I don't know about the king.

[E]

They called it the kingdom of hats. You've never seen the hats of.

[A]

Well, I'm watching a TV show again, called Kingdom.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

And they're wearing these large hats, baby, the hats.

[E]

Unbelievable.

[A]

Unbelievable hats.

[E]

Something important that. No, I mean, get up all of the. There was a. There was a show about. Was this the zombie show?

[A]

Yeah, the kingdom.

[E]

The hats in that show.

[A]

That's the one I was talking about.

[E]

I went from that. I saw that show and I went, look at these.

[A]

Look at the hats.

[E]

And I went back.

[A]

It's a whole tradition of hats and clothing.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

They were really into linen. And I'm gonna tell you this right now, it's fucking Prada shit, dude. We were into style.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? We were into like. You know what I mean? Check me out.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? And it's like, everything is just like clean, good lines, very Balenciaga.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

If you really think about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look at that, dude.

[E]

Yeah, look at that on the right,

[A]

on the different styles.

[E]

Different styles of hat.

[A]

Of hats. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're also clever because they're.

[E]

See, through the top knot. They breathe.

[A]

So it breathes.

[B]

Breathe.

[A]

We were already into technology.

[D]

Yeah. Breathable.

[A]

Yeah. And breathable fabric before anyone else.

[E]

Margaret Cho thing you said is interesting, though, because it was sort of like that was the last moment that there was kind of a left wing, progressive, edgy punk rock that got absorbed at some point into a mainstream.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

But it's like her and Patton Oswald getting around like Jim Goad and the. All the weird, edgy.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

Sort of proto fascist, straight, like violent. Kill yourself, kill other people.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

And you go, that's really gone away. There's not the people got the dirt bag lift. Dirt bag lift had nothing on.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Early Margaret Child.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah,

[A]

yeah, yeah.

[E]

What a moment.

[A]

Yeah. I witnessed the tail end of that.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? And I think I was molded by it. Like Bane was molded by the dark.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Remember Bane? Yeah. When he was mold.

[E]

When did that go away? And why did that go away? Because I'm. I wasn't there for it at all.

[A]

I think you were molded by it, too, as well. I watch your comedy, and I think you're molded by.

[E]

I would say so. Vice magazine had started up by the time I was in my teen years, and that was really big. And I know that was born of that. They're taking that ethos.

[A]

Yes. Yes.

[E]

And Gavin is a big Jim God person.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

There's some through line there.

[A]

Yes.

[E]

And the hipster thing was huge in Australia. We loved. It was like, have a little. We can be countercultural and have a nice little meal. Ride around on my bicycle.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Casual sex and a bookstore. It's great.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

But it does.

[A]

Your generation killed something. What happened?

[B]

What?

[C]

Yeah, No, I mean, you're wearing.

[E]

Very unfortunate.

[A]

Let's just look at your clothing.

[C]

It's sick.

[A]

Yeah, it is sick. Yeah. But. But it's like there's not you specifically. Right.

[C]

Okay. It felt like it was for a moment when you said look at your clothing.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Corrected at me. I guess I misunderstood.

[E]

You wearing corduroy trousers.

[A]

Yeah, bro.

[C]

These are J. Crew.

[E]

But in Los. In, this hate.

[A]

I know. See how defensive he is, too.

[E]

I love it.

[C]

Yeah, man.

[E]

Great.

[A]

No, go for it.

[E]

Go for it.

[A]

Yeah. Go for it.

[E]

Go for it.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[E]

I'm wearing Searsucker and linen. I planned ahead. Head for Los Angeles. Yeah.

[A]

I'm loving it. Yeah, Yeah.

[E]

I love it.

[A]

This is style.

[E]

Yeah. Suck on

[A]

it.

[E]

You're a great guy.

[A]

Yeah. You're a great guy.

[E]

He's a great guy.

[A]

You're a great guy. We can tell you're a great guy. Yeah.

[E]

Four years in a heady time.

[A]

It's a heady time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You feel you're still struggling? Yeah, a lot. Yeah.

[E]

Are you a door person? Where are you. Where do you do? Person Person.

[C]

The Comedy Store.

[E]

What a great place to be a door person.

[A]

It really is.

[E]

I've only been there about four times. I went in there the other night.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, my goodness.

[A]

What was. Did you go up?

[E]

I just watched from the back. I was. I couldn't get on this one. Oh, yeah, this was that Kanye was there.

[A]

Oh, who was that?

[D]

Kanye West.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Sorry. Kanye West.

[A]

I have a slippers. Those slippers are dope. Yeah, let's move on. Yeah, let's move on.

[D]

It was.

[E]

It was a night of many star.

[A]

It was Chris Roger.

[E]

Chris Rock was there. Yappel was there. Shane was there. Louis was there.

[A]

Wow.

[E]

It was a. I. I was with my friend Fuzzy.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

He's never been to California before, and he was. He'd never been in the store before. He's walking around going, is it like this every single night?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because mostly the nights are me.

[D]

It's usually you, Bobby, you're the guy.

[A]

It's me, Santino, Whitney Cummings, Ali Wong, Nikki Glazier. Ali Wong is pretty much the. Is pretty much. Is the regular nights.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

But during Netflix week, which is this week, is everyone. That's why I'm like, I was gonna take this week off, but they're like, you want a spot? And I'm like, I have to do it.

[C]

I think.

[A]

Yeah, I think I have to do it because I'm going to the. The house for the first time tomorrow. Did you hear about the house?

[E]

No.

[A]

Ted Sarando's has a lunch.

[E]

Okay. I know about this only because I saw Hannah Gadsby in the picture one year where she was a couple of years ago. She came along, and she's right in the corner. Chappelle's Way.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Let me about. Because Hannah's from your region.

[E]

Hannah started out in my city. She's a Tasmanian, but she started comedy.

[A]

Are you friends with her?

[E]

We've never really hung out, I'll be honest.

[A]

Yeah, she was.

[E]

She was doing much better than me in Australia when I was there. I once emceed a gig. She did.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And I didn't do a very good job.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And I think I was offensive. And anyway, so no disrespect.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, no disrespect either.

[E]

Great club.

[G]

Don't know her.

[E]

Great club comic.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Not known for that work. People give me a. People give me a look, but I'll stand up for it. She was a really strong club comic with tight, punchy bits.

[A]

I like her.

[C]

And then.

[A]

What are you talking about?

[E]

She did. No, no, over here.

[A]

Yeah, but he's anti everything. Yeah, yeah. He's like a Red Bar.

[E]

People don't want to hear it. I don't know who that is.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Red bar is a guy who.

[E]

No, I don't have any.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

Finding out Any more.

[A]

Let's move on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But this is the lunch.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

There she is.

[A]

Where? In the corner. No one's. That's not her.

[E]

That's her.

[A]

And then Chappelle.

[E]

That's them. Sorry, That's Hannah.

[A]

Yeah. Zoom into that area.

[E]

Yeah. Look how happy Chappelle is here.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. So every year they have this, the famous lunch. Right. And I'm finally invited the Asians.

[E]

You would say you don't get any outsized Asian attendance at your shows. You must.

[D]

No, he does.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, in San Francisco. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, when I play the Midwest, where they. We've never had an Asian or There are no Asians in the town.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

What can I do? Catch is, like, filled with whites.

[D]

If you showed up to a show and the entire audience was Asian, would that feel good or bad? Were weird to you?

[A]

Oh, it'd be great.

[D]

You'd like that. Okay.

[A]

Oh, no, I. You know, because when dumbfounded, did that outside, you know, all Asian festival, and that was a surprise. It was a huge reaction. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I know where I belong in the history and the annals of, you know, me. History of Asian comedy.

[D]

Yeah. Okay.

[A]

Okay, I understand. You know, I think the whites have it harder

[E]

accent. Accented whites. We have.

[A]

Oh, yeah, you have.

[E]

No, Ari, Maddie and I have like a. Like a hot knife through butter. We. Quite well.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

Can you do an American accent?

[E]

Yes.

[D]

See, they love it.

[E]

Oh, I turn it on and off, though, during the show. I try and I try.

[A]

I'll give you.

[E]

I go.

[A]

Sure. You know, but can I give you a line?

[E]

Parking my car at the car. Parking lot. Sorry, Parking lot. What do you want me to say? I'll try to go. I can do Midwest.

[A]

All right. Read the. This is your book. What's this book here?

[E]

My Struggle.

[A]

But whose book is it?

[E]

It's mine. I brought it in. Why Alex came. He actually does have Midwest. I do have books.

[A]

Can you read? Can you say this book? My Struggle, Carl Ove. In an American accent.

[E]

I struggle. Book one, Carl O. It's not great. I can do this one's much easier for. Personally, I find it not really difficult.

[A]

Yeah. Can you teach me how to do an Australian accent?

[E]

Dog. Dog.

[A]

Now give me a sentence.

[E]

Yeah, you. You dog.

[A]

You dog.

[E]

And even then, Americans really pronounce the. If it's an R at the end or a T, they pronounce it. We just. We just.

[G]

Ka.

[A]

Car. It's like Bostonian.

[E]

It's A little.

[C]

I have a.

[E]

It's a little south side Chicago.

[A]

I have a dreaming or whatever.

[E]

That's very good, that.

[A]

That's a very Martin Luther King as a skit. Yeah. Yeah. You think so?

[E]

Well, with the dreaming is the aboriginal.

[A]

Do you think this is a bit. Cause I thought about it. What if Koreans had, like, an mlk, you know what I mean? He did a speech like that with an accent. So I have a dreaming. Right. The white people do their own laundry. Do you think that would work as a bit or.

[C]

No?

[E]

Sure. Give it a go.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

I like it.

[E]

I have a bit about Koreans that I've not managed to get a. Off the ground.

[A]

Can it. Can you. Can you workshop it here?

[E]

Well, it's that the. From the outside, the stereotype is like, you know, these Koreans, they're like the anime. The black people, they like the fried chicken.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

But now I'm here, it's like, my God. I mean, the Koreans love the fried chicken, and black people love animals. That's the whole observation.

[A]

I think that it is a very. It's a very accurate observation. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Believe how much black people loved animals.

[A]

Yeah, they love it. Black people love, back in the day, kung fu Chinese movies, man. I.

[E]

And I wish that Liquid Swords. I don't know if you know the song Liquid Swords. It's all these Wu Tang songs. They've got an hour. They've got 90 seconds at the start of some odd Chinese, you know?

[A]

Yeah. They love it.

[E]

I find you and they. Samurai came from my father.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Weird noises happen.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Finally we get to the song. Liquid Swords is the big one where.

[C]

Where It's.

[E]

It's just 90 seconds of piffle and screaming.

[A]

Yeah, but they. It's heavy. The Asian culture is heavily influenced, you know? I mean.

[E]

Yeah. I mean, certain macho, macho. With the black thing. It's a fighting.

[A]

What's a macho?

[E]

Macho. I mean, kung fu movies. I was reading about this. I think the Tarantino, the kung fu movies, very macho. And black people.

[A]

Wait, wait.

[E]

Black people have a macho culture. Kung fu is a macho thing.

[D]

Like macho. You say macho.

[A]

What's macho mean?

[D]

Like tough.

[A]

Oh, macho, macho, macho man. Yeah, yeah. I want to be a macho man. Yeah.

[E]

It's actually not a.

[A]

And then Trump comes out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's doing yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What weird choice. YMCA and macho man. It's. It's. Yeah, like the worst. Maybe that's the only rights he can get. Is that what it is?

[B]

Maybe.

[E]

He ends on Candle in the Wind. I always thought that was beautiful.

[A]

His, his, his. After his speeches, he finishes the speeches,

[E]

they play Candle in the Wind.

[A]

Wow.

[E]

That's why there's that clip of him coming off stage. And they go, ruth Bader Ginsburg died and it's Candle in the Wind playing. Have you seen this clip?

[D]

No. No.

[E]

Oh, it's the greatest clip if I'm ever.

[A]

Explain it to me. Explain it to me.

[E]

He. They go, it's. And it seems to me in the distance, it's playing. And he comes over and he goes, what? And someone goes, what's. Bader Ginsburg is like? It's my first time hearing that. You're telling me that for the first time.

[A]

Wow.

[E]

She lived an incredible life. And then he walks up the steps.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

He salutes everybody. It's Candle in the Wind and the fucking flags going tonight.

[A]

Wow.

[E]

It's really. It's like cinema.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Perfect cinema.

[A]

Perfect.

[E]

Has anyone else seen it?

[D]

I've never seen this before.

[A]

Yeah, I've never seen it before. Yeah. Yeah. I love it already.

[E]

It's peak.

[A]

But. But the describing is better than seeing it.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Don't look it up.

[D]

Especially from an Australian.

[A]

From an Australia seeing it. Yeah, it as an Australian cry.

[E]

I cry thinking about it.

[A]

You do you live here now though, right? In Austin.

[E]

I was living in Austin. I moved back to Australia. Now I'm just doing a tour. We had a fourth child. It was hard.

[A]

Oh, okay. Congratulations.

[E]

We'll figure it out.

[A]

Congratulations.

[E]

Thank you. I appreciate it.

[A]

How do Australians feel about Americans right now because of the global conflicts. Can I. Is that uncomfortable? No, we're not a political show.

[E]

People are afraid to come. Most Australians feel odd coming.

[A]

Yeah. Because I have a tour in Australia in August.

[E]

Yep.

[A]

I'm going to Australia. I'm going down under.

[D]

Yeah, there you go.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Okay. And I am right, gonna sell out every show. Uh huh.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And it's gonna be great. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And Jay, you're gonna open for with me in Adelaide.

[E]

I think I might be filming. I am actually directing a movie in August. August. Would you come one day? Would you come one day early? I'll do the show. Will you come and be. I can only give. I can't necessarily pay you. It's a very low budget.

[A]

Yeah. You're doing. You're directing a movie.

[E]

Yeah, but can I.

[A]

I'm not a director.

[E]

I don't think it's gonna work.

[A]

Wait Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You lying piece of. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

I was quite careful with how I worded everything.

[A]

Crazy, dude. It's crazy dude. Yeah, yeah. That's you, dude.

[E]

Right.

[A]

And what I'm saying to you is this. I already said in the beginning of the show that you look like a director. Then you completely denied it, like you didn't want to do it.

[E]

I planned it.

[D]

I didn't.

[A]

And then now it's like, can you fly in a day early to do my movie so I can be in your movie?

[E]

I'll give you a good role in the movie.

[A]

You would?

[E]

Maybe, yeah. Great role. Powerful role.

[A]

Okay. Is it. Are you really directing a movie?

[E]

I'll send you the script.

[A]

No, you don't have to send me the script. I'll do it anyway.

[E]

All right, Done.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll do it anyway. But what I'm saying is. Yes, I'm doing it anyway.

[E]

Nice. Oh, so you are going to Australia.

[C]

Australia.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

He's the way back. You ready?

[A]

What?

[D]

Here we go, the cruise.

[E]

We gonna get on a one of

[A]

these two week cruises and get Hunter virus. Yeah, Come on, come on. I'm pure number one Hunter virus guy.

[E]

Brisbane to Hawaii.

[A]

Yeah. How long does that take?

[E]

Two weeks, three weeks, one month. You sit on the deck, you drink the.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

You drink the thing, go for the.

[E]

A swim and then you get off in Hawaii. You say, now I fly back with a sweet American jet fuel.

[A]

But, oh, a three week trip to Australia through a cruise and then a beautiful trip, that's six days.

[E]

Then you get booked on the cruise. Two, three thousand dollars, get a free room.

[A]

No, I'm not doing that.

[D]

Bobby will pay that to not do that.

[A]

Yeah, I'll pay not to perform. So three weeks on, one way to Australia.

[E]

No, no, I fly in. Fly in. You got American fuel to bring you in.

[A]

Oh, I fly into Australia and you ship out. Three weeks.

[E]

That'd be nice.

[A]

It would be nice. Go to Australia, Hawaii, stay a couple of days. Yeah, the problem is, is that I'm playing Hawaii in September.

[D]

September.

[A]

So what if that works?

[E]

We'll go September. Hello.

[A]

Hello.

[D]

Could work.

[A]

What if that did work?

[E]

He's in the Blue. The Blue room.

[A]

Lagoon, Blue night.

[E]

Hawaii theater.

[A]

Hawaii. No, no, the bigger one.

[D]

Yeah, it's a different.

[A]

Oh, I'm doing a bigger one. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

That's great. I've always wanted to do Hawaii.

[A]

Blue Note. What? The Blue Note. What I. What am I, Tony Hinchcliffe?

[E]

That's the Best I could imagine for myself. You're playing Rainbow Warrior Stadium. It's five to five. I'll text them tomorrow. I want to go to Hawaii.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

I've never been there.

[A]

Oh, you got to go.

[C]

Go.

[A]

You gotta go.

[E]

It seems the perfect. I got all these kids and we gotta keep going back and forward.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

What a nice place to get to stop and take a look.

[A]

You gotta go, dude, I. I took him. Yeah.

[D]

You gotta go with Bobby.

[A]

Yeah. It's different in Hawaii. Hawaii with me, it's different. Yeah. We go to Omasa. I know all the great spots are a lot of laying out, a lot of beach fun. You know, I mean, I'm looking forward. Yeah, Yeah.

[D]

I feel like you're pretty, you're recognized everywhere you go. But in Hawaii, it's a different level.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah. I have a whole big H. People go crazy for. I don't know crazy, but it's like I'm a local.

[D]

Yeah, you are.

[E]

You support a Hawaii independence.

[A]

I do, yeah. Yeah. And I was, you know, I, you know, I was on a show called Magnum PI which is. Was shot in Hawaii. So I worked a lot out there.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And as an actor. And so I don't lose the job.

[E]

It would be an honor.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

It be honestly an honor to have

[A]

you in the picture and can't pay you.

[E]

Right, right.

[A]

I'll do it for free, dude. I do movies and television for nothing. Because it's. It does. Doesn't do much. No one's going to see your movie. But anyway.

[E]

Hey, maybe so, maybe so.

[A]

It's hard to get off the ground. But I, I would.

[E]

You do it for free. And the movie does get off the ground. You'll come with us to the Khan Film Festival. You'll have a wonderful time.

[A]

And not only that. How about this as a promise, right? I'll do that small roll for you for free.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Right. But if it becomes a huge movie.

[E]

No, no, no.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

No, no, no.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or I won't do it.

[E]

How big is a huge movie?

[G]

All right.

[A]

So if you do this movie right, and it becomes I should have just moved on like an Academy Award winning movie, right?

[E]

Yes.

[A]

You'll get another movie.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

A bigger movie, right?

[E]

Yep.

[A]

I get a part in that movie.

[E]

I. I can accept these terms.

[A]

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

[E]

Pending your performance.

[A]

No, no, no, no. You shook first.

[E]

Apoplectic that not one line. Not one line. I think

[A]

solid. Two lines. I'm not background. One line.

[E]

I Would be an honest.

[A]

No, we know.

[F]

We.

[A]

I feel I have a significant role in the big Hollywood one.

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Cuz I've been in this boat before. You know that I have. Yeah. I literally. I've been on this boat before where I get screwed. Where they're like, you know, in do the short. Yeah, right. You're the star. Right. And then all of a sudden, we got funding for the movie. We're gonna get Keanu Reeves. Right. And then you're like. And then you're like, oh, I got fucked.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, I mean, have you ever

[E]

been in the Marvel Cinematic Universe?

[A]

I have not.

[E]

It might be time.

[A]

Are you directing, you think? I'm gonna call Warner Brothers. Hey, can I play Wolverine?

[E]

I think that there are enough people in there. If you just start putting that out, who knows what will happen?

[A]

Well, I have auditioned for Star wars and Marvel project, but not as a superhero, as like a scientist or something, you know? I mean, or a clerk at a hotel. Like, oh, my God, Spider Man's like. That helped you with shang chi. Yeah, you helped me with shang chi. Yeah, yeah.

[E]

I was gonna say shangchi. You didn't land anything in Crazy Rich Asians.

[A]

Oh, it's everywhere. That's all right. All right, all right, all right.

[E]

I don't know.

[C]

Yeah. All right.

[A]

I was tracking that movie from Inception to casting.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And when we called and said, can Bobby Lee audition? They go, he's never going to get it. So thanks for bringing that up again, you piece of.

[D]

You might. You might.

[E]

I truly are crazy. These riches.

[A]

I would have put you Ken Jung got it.

[E]

I would have put.

[A]

Anyway, did you have fun today?

[E]

He did blackface well.

[A]

He did, yeah.

[E]

Everybody knows that.

[A]

No, let me see.

[E]

Oh, and that episode of.

[A]

Let me see.

[E]

That episode of Community that got cut where he's a dark elf.

[D]

You may have just won your graces back with Bobby.

[A]

Well, no.

[E]

Can I say.

[A]

This is so funny, though. Yeah, send it. It's so. Oh, that's not Black Friday. He's an elf.

[C]

Yeah, he's like a.

[A]

Now find Mine. George Foreman. The George Foreman one. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[E]

George Foreman Woman.

[A]

No, I. I played George Foreman's son. Is that online? Yeah, I think. I think Bad Friends has it.

[D]

This is. I had no clue you did this. It's on mad tv.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, no, you're not gonna be able to find it. Give me some time. Okay. Anyway, well, we're done with the. Here's some of his dates. Oh, yeah. So your dates are.

[E]

Once you're all these shows get on here.

[A]

Is there a site that they can go to?

[E]

The James Donald Forbes McCann catamaran plan out now. All digital plan platforms Spotify Delicious little juice the hit single out now.

[A]

Okay, give four books of poem. Wow, four books. Give James a round of applause, everybody.

[E]

Thanks for having me. I really, really thank you for having fun.

[F]

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