Matt Jones & The Hollywood Truth

Summary

TigerBelly - Episode: Matt Jones & The Hollywood Truth

Date: July 8, 2026
Host: Bobby Lee
Guests: Matt Jones (actor), Khalyla, Luke, and others

---

Episode Overview

This episode of TigerBelly dives deep into the realities of life and work in Hollywood, featuring actor Matt Jones. The panel—comedians Bobby Lee, Khalyla, and Luke—unpack industry frustrations, class divides, changing opportunities, and hard-won wisdom as veterans and newcomers. It's a candid, sometimes biting, exploration of resilience, reinvention, and the relatable struggles behind the glamor of showbiz.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Nature of Hollywood: Disillusionment & Gatekeeping

• Matt Jones discusses being candid in recent interviews about how "the business sucks," explaining that even successful actors feel powerless in a changing industry, often too afraid to speak out for fear of burning bridges (02:44).

  "Some people don't post publicly, but I've had Oscar winners reach out and be like, holy, I feel the same way... Then say that publicly." – Matt (02:49)

• Bobby Lee and Matt bond over the lack of control and integrity struggles:

  "I have this shitty integrity. I don't want to be pathetic. And I've never asked for a job or dropped a name... and I did it the other day, and I couldn't sleep that night." – Matt (12:03)

• The Gatekeeping Power Structure:

  • Animosity toward "rich kids" who now run the industry, vs. creatives from working-class backgrounds.
  • Feeling like outsiders—"bottom Asians," "white trash"—even at events meant for inclusivity (14:57, 15:20).

2. Shifting Economics of Acting & Stand-Up

• How the money and opportunities have dried up:

  • Residuals and big paydays for network sitcoms are over; streaming and shorter seasons mean less compensation, higher cost of living, and fewer security nets (39:50–43:53).
  • Live personal appearances and conventions, another form of income, have shrunk post-2020 (68:23).

• Comparison to Stand-Up:

  • Stand-up is more direct ("A to B" with the audience), but grueling and uncertain.
  • Improv discussed as a "stupid" yet joyful creative outlet, though rarely lucrative (06:14–09:06).

• Bobby on pivoting:

  "So I'm like, I'll just do this. I transitioned out of waiting in line, but this is better. I don't know if it's better... but it's something." – Bobby (03:22)

3. Perceptions & Realities of Celebrity

• Misconception that those with recurring roles or fame are well-off.

  • Matt: “Even my kids, they're not going to be rich kids. We’re not that way.” (24:13)

• Recognition vs. Power:

  • Even frequently recognized performers may feel “bottom-tier” and excluded from lucrative projects or elite circles (93:00–93:49).

• The 'Rich People' World:

  • Stories of Hollywood parties and the surreal wealth on display (25:43–28:16).

4. Current Industry Trends: Looks Over Character, 'Podcast Creep'

• Rise of conventionally attractive leads:

  • "If you go back and watch 80s and 90s movies, nobody is that attractive... It's too distracting. Like, girls and guys." – Matt (55:06)
  • Pushback against pretty actors in every role and body modifications in period pieces (59:50–60:17).

• Podcast Oversaturation:

  • Frustration as Hollywood "A-listers" enter podcasting, crowding out grassroots creators (89:53–90:16).
  • Critique of podcasts devolving into bragging about “watches and how rich they are” instead of being relatable (90:36–92:05).

5. The Value of Honesty, Self-Acceptance, & Reinvention

• Matt and Bobby stress not caring what people think and the need to adapt.
• Advice on creating for oneself: Bobby encourages Matt to start a podcast or create online sketches, leveraging his improv skills (74:04–75:25).
• Generational divides, contentment, and setting new goals outside of fame.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Hollywood Honesty:

  "Everybody's afraid they're talking themselves out of a job. But I'm not getting jobs anyway, so..." – Matt (03:13)

• On Rich-Kid Gatekeeping:

  "And it's all run by rich kids. Executives are rich kids, bro." – Matt (15:08)

• Comedy World's Realities:

  "People climb over your corpse... I'm gonna fuck you right now... then they walk over your body.” – Matt (36:42) “The person we're watching now isn't the person that we're gonna be watching 10 years from now. Ripping on somebody that early is tough for me.” – Bobby (05:34)

• Evolution of Pay & Opportunity:

  “Back in the day, you could get a $300,000 house in North Hollywood... Now it’s $2 million for a house and you’re getting paid less per episode. And they’re only doing 10 episodes.” – Matt (43:17)

• Industry Advice & Self-Production:

  "Why don't you do sketches with your friend online and put them out?... You have that skill set." – Bobby (74:04)

• On fame and happiness:

  “I'm already the main character in my life. I got a beautiful wife and two kids. I'm doing great. I don't need to be the main character in your shitty thing that sells boner pills anyway.” – Matt (62:24)

---

Segment Timestamps

• Hollywood Disillusionment, Gatekeeping: 02:44–15:20
• Wealth/Status Stories (Palisades, Parties): 24:20–31:40
• Acting vs Stand-Up/Improv Industry Change: 39:50–43:53, 68:23–73:16
• Nostalgia for Old Hollywood & Auditioning: 84:03–87:17
• Podcast Landscape & Authenticity: 89:21–92:05
• Advice on Reinvention and Self-Production: 74:04–76:35
• Generational Frustrations, Modern Dating: 80:06–83:00

---

Additional Highlights

• Discussion on the episode “Widows Bay” (50:50):

  "I'm not kidding. It's one of the best shows I've ever seen. Unbelievable." – Matt

• Laughs about 'ugly actors' and relatability:

  "I love an ugly actor. Me too. You're a great actor. You're going to get work." – Matt / Bobby (57:07)

  • Matt Jones and Bobby’s self-effacing humor about their own perceived "Hollywood ugliness" and "Midwest hotness" (57:24–57:28).

• On the grind of live performance:

  “Any job where you’re doing something every single night, that’s hard. I put my kids to bed.” – Matt (73:05)

---

Tone, Style & Flow

The energy is raw, self-deprecating, and peppered with inside jokes, cultural observations, and genuine cynicism about entertainment as an industry. There’s warmth in the mutual support between old friends, and recognition of the cyclical nature of fortune in showbiz. The audience gets the real, frustrated, but determined voice of blue-collar Hollywood survivors.

---

Conclusion

This episode peels back the curtain on the myth of Hollywood glamour. Matt Jones and Bobby Lee, seasoned and scrappy, share hard truths about rejection, staying authentic, and making your own opportunities in a fickle business. Whether you’re starting out or deeply in the mix, the recurring message: stay nimble, keep perspective, and never stop learning—even if that means dyeing your t-shirts in a swimming pool or finally admitting you're "Hollywood ugly."

---

For more Matt Jones, follow him on Instagram (@MattJones). For Bobby and Khalyla, catch new episodes of TigerBelly every Wednesday.

Transcript

[A]

Writing some notes?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It's just like a kind of a.

[A]

Do you know who Matt Jones is?

[B]

Yes, of course. Dude, come on. You can't look at my notes.

[C]

I can't read. I honestly can't read a mute.

[A]

Don't ever yell at my guest again, man.

[C]

Horrible. Hang on.

[B]

Yeah, I wasn't.

[C]

I can't read that.

[B]

They say that's a sign of genius.

[C]

Okay. All right.

[A]

I feel like Luke is a young Matt Jones.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah, I was never that.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah. Y. Young. Same kind of haircut.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

All right.

[A]

I mean, is that what the whites are doing lately? I don't even know.

[B]

What's the meeting like?

[A]

Yeah. What is the meaning of that, haircut guy?

[C]

I don't go to church anymore. Do you?

[B]

No, I never. I'm Jewish. I never went to church.

[A]

You're Jewish?

[C]

Temple. My bad. Also a church.

[A]

It is a church. There's four main religions, are there not?

[B]

Is that, like, a loaded question?

[A]

Yeah, it's not a loaded question. There are. There are four main religions. I would say three.

[C]

Well, I would say zero.

[A]

Yeah. I would say Christianity, Muslim.

[C]

Hinduism is really big.

[A]

Yeah. Hinduism and Israel. Israelites. Just the country. Yeah, Yeah. I mean, Judaism.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Judaism, yeah, yeah. Are there the four? Would Scientology be in there?

[D]

No.

[A]

Pretty big, though. They're pretty big.

[C]

I guess.

[A]

Yeah. What do you mean, you guess?

[C]

I don't give a shit.

[A]

You don't give. You're in a kick right now. You don't give a shit about anything.

[C]

I really don't.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. So the reason why I got mad here, I mean, I. You've been on the list forever, but I was like. I was watching. I don't know why, but you kept popping up on my TikTok feed.

[C]

Okay, I'm on TikTok.

[A]

Yeah, you're on TikTok.

[C]

I don't have TikTok.

[A]

Yeah, I don't either, but I still, you know.

[C]

You don't?

[A]

Well, I mean, I've never posted anything. I just. I like watching it.

[C]

Right.

[A]

So I created a profile so I can just watch it.

[B]

It's kind of having it.

[C]

I'm bad enough with Instagram, so I don't.

[A]

Yeah, I don't. Was it trending on Instagram?

[C]

I don't know. I. I don't know.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, you did an interview. A couple of interviews.

[C]

Yeah, I've done a couple. And I've just been a little honest about how much the business sucks.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And. Yeah. And I've had. What's Weird is people. Some people don't post publicly, but I've had some, like, I don't know, Oscar winners reach out and be like, holy, I feel the same way. And I was like, well, then say that publicly.

[A]

Yeah, but no, they don't.

[C]

No, because I. Everybody's afraid they're talking themselves out of a job.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But I'm not getting jobs anyway, so

[A]

that's what I felt.

[E]

Right.

[A]

Why do you think I'm in this garage? You know what I mean?

[C]

It really is a garage.

[A]

I know it's a garage. I'm in my garage because I couldn't get the work, you mean? So I'm like, I'll just do this. Yeah, Yeah. I mean, at the end of the day, it's like, I try to. I transitioned out of waiting in line,

[C]

but this is better.

[A]

I don't know if it's better. I don't know if it's worse, but it's like, it's something that, like, I went a different direction, but I understand, you know. Holy, is that you?

[C]

So he wasn't as.

[A]

You weren't as Luke back then. Wow. What happened there?

[C]

A lack of parenting.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Just no one was really paying attention to what I was eating or doing.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Boy, you're swimming in bog water.

[C]

In butter.

[A]

You were swimming in butter. Is this. Oh, yeah, yeah. Absolutely unfuckable.

[C]

Crazy. Oh, my God.

[A]

That's not unbuckable.

[C]

He got some girls. That's 1999.

[A]

It's like a fat Michael Shannon.

[C]

Yeah. Okay. That is kinder than I would.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

I, I always thought I looked. I, I looked like a lesbian until I was 20.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Like, that is a stand up comic.

[A]

Yeah, that's a stand up comic.

[C]

Yeah. Like Barbara Sanders, something like that.

[A]

Signing up a killed honey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Traveling people travel to go do that show.

[E]

It's wild.

[A]

It's wild. Yeah. From all over the country, they travel to go to that.

[C]

I can't watch it.

[A]

I can't. Okay. I can't watch it.

[C]

I. I know it's really popular.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And it's.

[A]

I can't do it. I. I've done it. I can't do it.

[B]

He sneaks out.

[A]

I sneak out.

[C]

I can't. It's. I, I appreciate that people love it, but it just makes me so uncomfortable. I don't like it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I've. I've guested on that panel before with Bert, some other people, and I usually leave halfway during it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'll go, I gotta Go to the bathroom and I'll, like, wait 45 minutes and then come back. You know, I. I cannot do it and I will never do it again. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Cause you just don't like being mean to people or something or.

[A]

It's just. I just don't know what to say. It's like, you know, people are developing and it's like.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The person that we're watching now isn't the person that we're gonna be watching 10 years from now. So it's like, ripping on somebody that early is tough for me.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I'm not a roaster in general. I mean, I called you a fat Michael Shannon.

[C]

Pretty good.

[A]

Pretty good. Pretty good roast.

[C]

But I mean, personally, I just. The whole show is about, like, who's going to be the next stand up comic.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I don't think anybody should be. I want to say no to everybody.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah.

[C]

I think it's done. We don't need more. More standups.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is it because you're such a die hard improv guy?

[C]

You're like, no, I'm not a diver. Improv is stupid waste. I love it because I hang out with my friends and I'll do it every now and then, but it is an illegitimately stupid waste of time watching it. You did comedy sports? I did in high school.

[A]

Oh, my God. Yeah. What's comedy sports?

[C]

It was a thing that was popular in the 90s where it was like, you wear jersey. Yeah.

[A]

No, really? You wore a jersey?

[C]

Yeah. And you'd, like, compete against the other team for audience claps, but it was all, like, rigged and it was like wrestling in its own. And it was stupid.

[A]

What was your team called?

[C]

It was just whatever, like the red team or the blue team. New team every time. Yeah. I was on a high school team, so we were Claremont High School comedy sports.

[A]

Wait, Claremont. Is that San Diego?

[C]

No, that. This is without the eye. This is next to Pomona.

[A]

Oh, Pomona. Okay. So you're. Do you guys usually win or whatever?

[C]

The home team was won. That was the rule.

[A]

And you never did Second City or anything like that? Or grounding?

[C]

I did Boom, Chicago and Amsterdam.

[A]

Oh, you did boom.

[C]

I did Boom, Chicago and Amsterdam.

[A]

Oh, good.

[C]

Tons of UCB stuff in prevalence.

[A]

Did you do it with Ike and all those guys?

[C]

They were a little before me, but I did a bit with Jordan.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And Colton.

[A]

And Colton Dunn. Yeah.

[C]

I mean, tons of people.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And Jordan. Jordan Peele.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

He just said that.

[C]

Sorry I didn't drop the appeal.

[B]

That's What? I'm clarifying.

[A]

Either it was Michael Jordan. I don't know

[C]

Michael Jordan.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Stop playing basketball.

[A]

Matt Jones. Michael Jordan.

[C]

Larry Bird. Stop playing basketball.

[A]

Hussein Bolt. Michael Phelps in, I imagine, that improv group. Oh, my God. Terrible.

[B]

But I just wanted to clarify.

[C]

But also, every improv group is terrible. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, what. You know what the worst torture is? Watching long form improv.

[C]

So. Oh, yeah. Yes. I would say yes, 99.999% of the time.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then there's these certain people that can do it so well, Keegan can do it that it fools everyone else.

[A]

Yeah, I can do it.

[C]

Did you know Tammy Sager?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Like Tammy. I would see her and like Craig Kakowski and like Stephanie Weir.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And Bob Dassing. Like those people.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Unbelievable.

[A]

Unbelievable.

[C]

But then everyone else.

[A]

Yeah, don't do. That's the crib of the crop. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

I have a guy, Dave Hill. We've been doing a two man together for like 15 years. We are very good at it.

[A]

Wait, wait, wait. You have an improv group?

[C]

Yeah, it's just.

[A]

I thought you said it's shit.

[C]

Yeah, that's why we don't.

[A]

You said it was shit.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

That's why you're currently in an improv group.

[C]

Yes. Yes. That's how he knows. No, our show's not everything.

[A]

How do you know?

[C]

No, it is sometimes.

[A]

I'm gonna watch it. I'll tell you if it's or not. When's your next live show?

[C]

We don't. We. We do them like randomly, like maybe like three or four times a year.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna go to the next one.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. And I will tell you if the

[C]

next one is in Minneapolis.

[A]

It is. It's long form.

[C]

Yeah. We do it. We get one suggestion. We do like a full show that everything connects. It's almost like a play.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But it's. It's very good.

[A]

Yeah. Do you, do you. So do you do improv, Luke?

[B]

I took two classes.

[C]

Where at?

[B]

I took UCB 101.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

No big deal.

[B]

Educated. And then I did one day class at the Groundlings.

[C]

Okay, cool.

[B]

And I thought this isn't really for me.

[A]

It isn't. Yeah, yeah. He's a stand up. Don't judge true comedy.

[C]

Real comedy, real shit. Kill Tony. Shit. I, I honestly, I'm a huge, huge stand up fan. Been a stand up fan my whole life.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I just, I've never done it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Because I like stand up.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I just know that, like I Could do it. I could legitimately do it, but I don't think I would be great at it. And I think it's been too long now.

[A]

No.

[C]

For me to get.

[A]

Get going.

[C]

To throw away my nights and weekends.

[A]

No, you get 20 minutes and then you open for me.

[C]

Yeah. Anytime.

[A]

No, right now.

[C]

Right at my ass. I do. Absolutely.

[A]

You have 20 minutes of stand up.

[C]

I could do. I could do a solid 10 right now.

[A]

Wow. Wow. Holy.

[C]

I could.

[A]

You could. Yeah, Yeah. I want 20. 25.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

All right. Get that. And then it'll be. You'll be opening for me.

[C]

Okay, great.

[A]

Yeah. And I'll pay you good.

[C]

All right. Done.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll pay you good. So. But, you know, I look at. I've. I just recently. As in 20 minutes ago. Yeah. That's how I prepare. Yeah. Matt's coming. I'll do some preparation. And I looked at your IMDb and I scrolled through it and a mass amount of work.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? You were in Badger, Breaking Bad.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

And then you were also in that supernatural anti Superman movie.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Brightburn.

[C]

Yeah. James Gunn produced. David Yourofsky directed.

[A]

Yeah. And so you know, James. I do, yeah. Yeah. Can't push anything,

[C]

I guess. I don't know.

[A]

I mean. Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

I mean, here, I'll tell you this.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I'll throw this out there. I don't even care. I. The other thing.

[A]

I don't care.

[C]

I auditioned for something, a big one.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

That he's involved with. And for the first time in my entire career, I've never done this ever. Ever.

[E]

Ever.

[A]

Yeah, ever.

[C]

I messaged him and I was like, hey, just let you know I auditioned for this just so you can make sure you see the tape.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Basically.

[A]

That's not a bad thing.

[C]

I've never thought they do, but I've never done that because I have this, like, shitty integrity. And, like, I don't want to be pathetic. And I've never asked for a job or dropped a name ever.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I did it the other day, and I swear to God, I couldn't sleep that night.

[E]

Oh, wow.

[C]

So I was like, how did I do that?

[A]

No, no, that's what you're supposed to do. Matt.

[C]

The agent is supposed to. No, no, no, no.

[A]

You know what I did the other day? This is the first I've ever done. All right. I wasn't moving as many tickets in Chicago, although I sold it out, but because I had to pull in the big guns and it was hard to ask. I Went to Jo Koy, Gabriel Iglesias, Tom Segura, and Bert Kreischer. And I go, can you post a story for my show? And then it sold out.

[C]

There you go.

[A]

But it was very difficult to do. I'd never done that before. Cause I could usually sell out on my own. But it was like. It was because of the economy and because people aren't selling right now. You know what I mean? I had to do it. But in this day and age, I think making that text is the right thing to do.

[C]

See, but the difference between you doing stand up.

[A]

Here we go. There's a difference.

[C]

Well, I'm telling you, you're doing stand up.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And me doing some fucking movie or TV show.

[A]

Yeah. I still do it too.

[C]

I'm still behind the business, man.

[A]

I mean, Nimrod's coming out. I was in Happy Gilmore too. I'm not out.

[C]

He's like, I saw your IMDb man.

[A]

No, no. Yeah. I was in the city reservation.

[C]

I did stuff saying the difference. Like you. You're doing it yourself, right? You're booking this place.

[A]

Booking what? Like my house?

[C]

No, no, the theater in Chicago.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Right.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

A to B, it's you to there, you to the audience.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I. I have to crawl through, like, mountains and oceans of dog shit to get to a job.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then back through because there's all these people in the middle that are taking all the money.

[A]

I know.

[C]

For everybody. Not just for me, for the people that are directing it for everybody.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So there's advertisers and all this shit. You're just going to a place and selling to stupid people that'll pay you to. They don't think you're funny. But, like, that's a direct con. Whereas, like, the long. Whereas the long con is like, I. I have no control over my fate. That's terrible.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't want to do.

[A]

Well, take control.

[C]

Exactly.

[A]

Yeah. That's what I told you the other day. I texted you, I go, you got to take control.

[C]

So you said, I. You texted me I should start a podcast about how shitty the business is.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

And I just don't want to hear some. I don't want to hear a bunch of fucking actors complain about it anymore. I don't. I wouldn't listen to that.

[A]

I would.

[C]

You would.

[B]

I would, too.

[A]

And yeah, I would too. The reason why I would listen to it is because I feel the same shift. I feel the same resentment. I feel the same anger about it. So it's like, yeah, I would definitely listen to that.

[C]

I think it's just still. It's just me mad at rich kids, right? Yeah, I know from when I was a kid. I hate rich kids and I still hate rich kids. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And. And it's all run by rich kids.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Like, all the executives are rich kids, bro.

[A]

You know, Bro, there's this thing. Bro, I want to tell you something. There's this thing called the Golden Gala. Okay. It's an. It's.

[B]

It's.

[A]

It's the uppity Asians.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And every year they get together. Yeah. Right. And they invite me. Right. But I can't have a plus one. Everyone else has a plus one. Right. And the one time I went, right, I was in the back, right. And all the Steven Yoons and the Michelle Yao's and the John Jones.

[C]

Because you're a bad Asian because they think you're gonna show up with like, a prostitute. They're afraid you're gonna do that.

[A]

I know, but if you were married

[C]

to a nice young girl.

[A]

No, but I have a nice girlfriend right now.

[C]

Yeah, but you're not married.

[A]

I know, I know, I know. I'm not married. And I'll never get married.

[C]

And you'll still never get a pl. What?

[A]

I know. No, no, I want to. No, what I'm pay. My point is, is that I know I'm going to be in the back, right. I know they're going to side eye me, like, you know what I mean? Oh, my God. There's their dirty one. You know what I mean? They consider me the dirty one, you know what I mean? And it's like. I mean, I could argue that I have a bigger fan base.

[C]

Absolutely.

[A]

You mean. Than most of them. I. We're talking about built right now.

[C]

Built.

[E]

Built.

[A]

Built right now.

[B]

Sold.

[A]

Built.

[C]

Built right now.

[B]

Get your bilt on.

[A]

I love bilt, man. B I L T, man. It's like, you know, whether you're renting or paying a mortgage, one of your biggest monthly expenses should be working harder for you. And that's the fact. That's where bilt comes in. Bilt is the membership where you live that rewards you with points on every housing payment wherever you live.

[E]

And honestly, it's something that, like, okay for me at least.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Like you can't get away from it. You pay rent or you pay a mortgage, and it just stings. Right? But now with built.

[A]

Not with built. It sings my ass.

[E]

It stings.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Not with built, though.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Not with built out yeah, yeah.

[E]

It just doesn't matter anymore. And it kind of is. Like you're almost excited to pay rent because there are perks to paying rent now. You get points and you can use those points towards everything, including important for me, student loans.

[A]

Exactly. Built members also get access to a neighborhood concierge. You can make restaurant reservations, book fitness classes and find new local spots, all while being rewarded at more than 45,000 merchant partner partners. It's like having a personal assistant baked into where you live, Luke.

[B]

So as a young comic, what do you use Built for. You know, it's simple. I do pay a lot of rent myself. I'm constantly paying rent and it's nice to be able to earn points on stuff and then be able to redeem it at places like Amazon.com, lyft rides, gift cards, Members only experiences. This is stuff I use all the time.

[A]

What members only experience do you use?

[B]

I use Lyft rides at Amazon pretty much.

[A]

That's pretty cool.

[B]

Yeah, that's one of my. You're kind of a members only guy.

[A]

No, I'm a built home delivery powered by Gopuff. That kind of guy. I'm that kind of guy.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Soul soccer.

[E]

I'm just a basic student loan balances kind of guy.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Anyway, guys, join the membership for where you [e-mail] Once again, let's join the membership for where you live at joinbuilt.combelly. that's J-O-I-N-B-I-L-T.combelly. make sure you use our URL so that we. So they know we sent you hymns

[A]

for your hair and prescription stuff. Yeah, him. Or choose an oral medication. Yeah, you guys. Hymns to save my life. My hair is thicker, stronger, never look better. I'm growing my hair out again. Catching hair loss early makes all the difference, Luke. The sooner you start, the better your options. Hims makes starting simple with 100% online process and personalized treatment plans delivered straight

[E]

to you, to you, to you, right to your door. Convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments because those are the only ones that truly work, you guys. Prescription strength ingredients like finasteride minoxidil can actually help prevent further hair loss. And regrow hair in as little as three to six months.

[A]

Wow. That's like short period of time, Luke.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Find the right hair regrowth treatment for you, Luke. Okay. With Flexible subscription options, access24.7 provider support, and once a day treatment options that fit your daily routine.

[B]

Luke, I have noticed. I felt like my hairline has been pushing back a little. It does. Yes, it does feel like people are starting to notice, especially everyone in this room. So it'd be nice to find the right hair growth treatment for me.

[E]

Yeah, catch it early. Use HIMS now.

[A]

Yeah, it's straightforward guy transparent and designed to make getting care feel very easy. And don't you like easy?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. Start now, dude.

[B]

For simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, weight loss and more, visit hims.combelly that's hims.combelly for your free online visit hims.combelly Featured products include compound dry products with the FDA does not approve or verify for safety, effectiveness or quality.

[C]

Prescription work wide.

[B]

Individual results may vary. See websites for full details, restrictions and important safety information. Ignite your taste buds with a freezer Pop classic reimagined as a delicious Firework Freeze five Hour Energy Shot. Juicy cherry, citrusy lime and candy like blue Raspberry combine to create a bold flavor explosion in every sip. The iconic Freezer Pop flavor you crave with none of the sugar. Spark a tasty flavor sensation with Firework Freeze 5 Hour Energy Shots available online at 5hourenergy.com and Amazon Now. We love the new Firework Freeze 5 Hour Energy Shot flavor. It perfectly recreates that summer classic freezer pop taste with a caffeinated twist. Ignite your taste buds with a Firework Freeze Flavored 5 Hour Energy Shot. Now available online at 5 Hour Energy.com or Amazon Shopify

[A]

Shopify Shopify. We use Shopify here on Tiger Belly and we only use the best here. Of course we have our merch and we sell it off of Shopify. And we love it because Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the US from household names like Allbirds, Rothy's, Tiger, Belly and also skims to brands Just getting started. Get started with your own design stores. I love design studios, don't you? You get to do whatever you want with hundreds of ready to use templates and Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style

[E]

and also you can get the word out like you have an actual marketing team behind you. You can easily create email and social media campaigns wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. Best yet though, Shopify is your commerce expert with world class expertise in just about everything from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and beyond.

[B]

Something I really like also about Shopify is that Shopify helps me find customers with like easy to run email and social media campaigns. Very important so I can grow my own brand. It's time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com tigerbelly go to shopify.com tigerbelly that's shopify.com tigerbelly before we

[A]

dive back into today's episode, great news for the comedy TV fans. Every episode of the Hulu original series Alice and Steve is streaming on Hulu. From the producers of Baby Reindeer comes a new edgy comedy. Lifelong best friends Alice and Steve see their world implode when Steve starts dating Alice's 26 year old daughter. Uh oh. The once rock solid friendship turns sour as Alice tries to sabotage their romance and Steve attempts to salvage their friendship leading to hilarious hijinks and chaos. A fiasco of per se. This unique comedy that can only be described as the first rom com proves that sometimes best friends make the best enemies.

[E]

Alice and Steve takes a wild premise and turns it into a sharp, insightful laugh out loud British comedy with real emotional bites. Starring Jemaine Clement and Nicola Walker, the series explores friendship and modern dynamics with a blend of dry, dark British wit and awkward situational comedy that will delight every generation.

[B]

Watch every episode of the Hulu original series Alice and Steve on Hulu and Hulu on Disney for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

[D]

Why does Progressive work hard for truckers? Because truckers unite the world. They unite kids with their first drum sets and parents with earplugs. But truckers can't do this if they're not on the road. That's why Progressive has over 360 heavy truck employees to help truckers stay on time and. And on track. Quote Truck Insurance today in as little as eight minutes at progressive commercial.com progressive casualty insurance company and affiliates.

[A]

Yeah, okay.

[C]

Bobby's got me spicy.

[A]

I got, I got him. I got them all spicy.

[C]

No, but I'm going to be white trash for the rest of my life. I just will be to them in my head. Right?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I'm not going to be a rich kid.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Even my kids, I'm like. And we had money for a bit. We don't need more like, you know, my kids, they're not going to be rich kids. You know, I mean, they're just not. We're not that way.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

God, though.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Thank God.

[A]

Why? Why thank God?

[E]

I just feel as though like every

[A]

way you're talking.

[E]

Sorry. I grew up in the Palisades.

[C]

Fucking Palisades I'm an executive.

[B]

Can I tell you you're never going to work again.

[C]

I won't. I will. Talking shit about Jews in the palace. I'll tell you what, this is my. This is how crazy. I grew up 45 minutes east of here, right?

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

And I came into town, I was doing commercials and whatever. I was like 18 and on. And I had this friend that grew up in the Palisades and we had like a sketch group when I was like 19, 20, another sketch group. And we practice. We practice in his parents garage in the Palisades.

[A]

How do you practice? Oh, it was. Oh, sketches. Okay.

[C]

And this is how ridiculous the Palisades is. I was driving down the road in my shitty like 1988 Nissan Sentra at the time and I had the windows rolled down and I had just put in like a CD player. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Like, this is like where you had to take off the face. And I'm driving down the road and I'm playing Come Sail Away and I'm like rocking out, like moving. And then a girl rides up to me on like a ninja motorcycle, like nods at me and rides off. Oh, nice. I come up to another stoplight and I go in and Arnold Schwarzenegger pulls up next to me in a convertible black Ferrari in a T shirt, a black T shirt dressed like the Terminator and looks at me and goes like that, gives me a thumbs up and drives on. And I was like, wow, the Palisade, that's good.

[A]

You perceived it wrong.

[C]

Yes. I'm a negative person.

[A]

I know, I know. He would never give me a thumbs up. He would go, fuck you.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Bottom Asian. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm a bottom Asian dude. Yeah, I.

[C]

That's probably true.

[A]

That's probably true. I think it is. I think. I really believe I'm a bottom Asian.

[E]

We all are. I think.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

In this room. All the Asians in this room are bottom Asians.

[E]

Yeah. And I'm thankful for that too.

[C]

I also love rich people too. Right?

[B]

You do?

[C]

You do? All of a sudden. No, no.

[A]

Out of nowhere.

[E]

You do.

[C]

I deeply. I deeply resent them.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

But like, have you ever been like a really incredible rich person party?

[E]

Yeah, I love.

[A]

I went to Thanksgiving at Michael Bay's house.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

I went to this like Hollywood party years ago.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I can't say who it was.

[A]

Why?

[C]

Well, because it's. I don't know who it was. No, no, no. I was invited.

[A]

You don't know who it is?

[C]

No, I was invited to the party. It was the agency I was with at the time. It was like the owner of the agency. Can you tell me the agency Paradigm. And it was like the owner of the agency is like, has like so much money, but it was their brother, I think.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And it was in like in a part of the Hollywood Hills I didn't know existed. It's like down in a back canyon kind of thing.

[A]

Michael Bay. Michael Bay.

[C]

Where the hell am I?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And like their backyard had like two pools and in the middle of the pools was like a green grass area that was like the size of a football field. Yeah, this is their backyard.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then they had like, what's the famous Nobu there? Like, and like every alcohol you could think of, I just. Whatever you want. And so I was like, oh, just top shelf everything. Open bar.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So I just was drinking like 30 year old Scotch like crazy.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then I was like, well, I have to go to the bathroom. And they're like, oh, this guy will lead you down to the bathroom.

[A]

And there's tons of people, other stars there. Yeah, a lot.

[C]

Yeah, I. I remember. God rest soul. I was wasted. I cornered James Vanderbeek and talked to him for like a half an hour.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

And I walked back. My wife was like, what were you guys talking about? I was like, I don't remember.

[A]

Yeah, Vanderbank's in this podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Nice guy. Really nice.

[A]

And pist.

[C]

And he. Anyhow, I had to go to the bathroom and we like, they like led me down these stairs and I went under this massive house and there was a movie theater with like four pool table, like a pool hall connected to a movie theater, connected to a concession area that was completely full and it was just. And then there's a small bowling alley thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then I, I opened a door because I started snooping and I saw 22 washers and dryers.

[E]

Yeah, 22.

[C]

22. I counted.

[A]

It's a sweatshop. And I was like, yeah. How do you get other businesses going

[C]

to run 22 at one time? Yeah, like that, that blew my mind over.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Is it coin operated?

[A]

That sounds really funny. Yeah, yeah, that's really funny. Very funny. Like a little toka machine.

[E]

No, it was just a serious question. Were they running a business? 22 is wild.

[C]

I just couldn't believe it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. And did they have those, one of those machines, what you put like, you know, get snacks?

[C]

No, there wasn't a vending machine. It was Just why would it be behind glass? It's just there to take.

[A]

All right.

[C]

When I was a kid, if there

[A]

was this, that'd be cool. There was a venom, there's this.

[C]

If I was a kid, if there was a Snickers, you would eat the stick.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

You wouldn't be like, you know what, I'm gonna have that later.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

No, yeah, eat it now.

[A]

Oh, you eat it now. Yeah, yeah, they had that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would just love my, like my chips to get snagged at this party.

[C]

Would that peek.

[A]

Pushing the machine so that it unsnags anyway.

[C]

But that peek into that rich world is unbelievable.

[A]

I've peaked too. I'm a peaker, you know, I mean, and I've. I've peaked.

[E]

What did you see in Michael Bay's house where you were like, oh, I can never get to this level.

[A]

Well, I mean, I don't have a museum.

[E]

Oh, he has a museum.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Of his own stuff.

[A]

Of all his own stuff.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's awesome.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. So I have never been to an in house museum.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Of his own work. Yeah. There's a bumblebee there. Sure. The full thing.

[E]

Really?

[A]

Oh, yeah. The car.

[E]

Oh my God.

[A]

Yeah. There's the. I already told you that in the movie, the rock, the little. The ball. Oh yeah, the ball thing. Do you remember the rock? Yeah, yeah.

[C]

So green. The green.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. So I picked that up. He has a museum, he has a movie theater. I saw a full blown movie that hadn't been released yet. You know, I mean, in his movie theater. And then I also saw. He named his deer.

[E]

He is a deer.

[A]

He has deers.

[E]

Oh, just like free roaming in the

[A]

neighborhood in his backyard. Oh, he goes, there's Frank. Okay. You name them. Okay.

[E]

I mean, but that's not a rich person thing. Deer just come across people's property whenever. I, I wanted to ask you guys though, like, if you did have absolute like fuck you money and you know, like Michael Jackson got like a giraffe, like, what would be your first big fuck you purchase?

[C]

I, I just would never. I, I can't imagine amount of money where I'd ever spend like that. That. Luke, I just wouldn't.

[B]

I would probably.

[A]

No, no, I would buy you.

[D]

What?

[A]

Give me the Palisade. You're my bubble. You're my bubble. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Give me that little boy from the.

[A]

Yeah. Never Ending Ranch. That's what I call Never Ending Ranch. And you'll be there. Well, you wouldn't do it for how much money? Do. What would I have to pay you to.

[B]

I mean, it would have to be his backyard giraffe.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Honestly, if I could just live there for free, I'd probably do it.

[E]

Come on.

[D]

No.

[A]

Come on.

[E]

Name a price.

[A]

Say a price.

[B]

I guess a million a year.

[C]

That's not true.

[A]

That's not true.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Point.

[A]

California.

[C]

Non California. Boy, that's one of the problems for that.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah.

[B]

I mean, take it.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, people have been urging me to move out of L. A for a bit now.

[E]

Haven.

[A]

Tax. Yeah.

[B]

One of the tax. Haven.

[C]

Yeah, but what are you gonna.

[A]

We're gonna go Austin, and that's what I'm saying. I don't know where to go.

[E]

Well, you love Washington.

[C]

Puerto Rico.

[E]

Washington D.C. no, Washington the state.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

If you're gonna continue to do this. This sucks on Zoom, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You gotta have people in person.

[E]

I know.

[C]

In a place where it is.

[A]

I know. So that's why I stay. It's only because of podcast guests. Is the only reason that's linking me into this town is podcasting because Andrew's not going to move. And where he wants to move. He wants to move into a place where I don't want to move, which is Phenix.

[E]

Oh, God, no.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

He's moving to Phoenix.

[A]

He wants to move to Phoenix because of the taxes and also because of fucking golf. Golf?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Do you play golf?

[C]

No. Either. Golf sucks. Jesus. Right?

[A]

So bad.

[C]

It's so boring. Can I die from smelling their own farts? Shit is so boring.

[A]

I know. And because of global warming. That's. So that place is going to get hotter and hotter in 2050. It's going to be unlivable. Phoenix.

[C]

The. Also the amount of. I can't. The amount of.

[A]

Yeah, you can. You will see it.

[C]

The wasted space of golf courses in Los Angeles alone. And by the way, they're not taxed on this shit. They are not taxed on. It's billions of dollars and you've got hundreds of thousands of homeless people on the street. And if you just tax the fucking golf course. I can't.

[B]

I know.

[A]

I hate golf. Churches, too.

[C]

Oh, God.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Don't get me even started.

[C]

We could all live our lives. You want to lower taxes? Tax churches.

[A]

Tax churches. Yeah. And oil companies. No.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought you were, like, pausing on oil. Let me think about oil.

[E]

Hate golf, but love oil.

[A]

Big oil. Yeah. So you think it's. It's forever dead Hollywood.

[C]

No, no, no. I think it's. No, I just think that it's working in a different way. And for people like you and me, no one is ever going to give you the role you want to get.

[A]

I know. Ever, Ever.

[C]

They're just not going to do it

[A]

because they be so negative.

[C]

And it's not. It's not just cuz you don't have. It's not cuz they don't have a role for you. It's because they. They don't have the money or the courage to cast you in something because they need the latest. Like, what's the guy? He's a good actor, but he's. He was gonna replace you in Death and Ramen. Oh, that guy?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

He's like this super hot Asian guy with abs. Like crazy abs. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.

[A]

The British guy?

[C]

Yeah, in British. He's an excellent actor.

[A]

You were getting recast in that movie too.

[C]

Yeah, of course. Yeah, of course I'm getting recast.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. No, it's so here. All right, this is the deal. Let's talk about it.

[C]

He's not from la, right?

[A]

He's not from la. He's not from L. A.

[C]

He is. He's a kid from. From New York and Hong Kong. Right?

[A]

Hong Kong, Yeah.

[C]

Like, he's got that style and he's young, so they don't know like about. And also your generation. Sorry, buddy. You don't know about, like a respecter. Decorum

[A]

that even that.

[B]

Yeah, okay.

[C]

Because when I was your age, I keep my mouth shut.

[A]

You learn and you listen. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

If I talk that way in front of Michael Richards.

[A]

I know, dude.

[B]

Also, you're saying this guy doesn't know the business? Hong Kong and New York, that's pretty business.

[C]

No, no, I'm talking about the inside of the business. So he like made his first thing and he was like, oh, cool. People like it. I want to make it even cooler. Let's get some people that can get the movie funded. Me and Bobby can't get the movie funded.

[A]

No, we can, maybe.

[C]

No, we can, but not as much money. And we're not.

[A]

We can. Okay, okay, we can.

[C]

I don't have the confidence that you do.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Isn't that like kind of how the business works anyway?

[C]

No, no, the way the business works is people climb over your corpse. That is true. People are like, hey, hey, can do me a favor? I'm gonna. I'm gonna fuck you right now. Can you do me a favor? Just let me fuck you and you're like, oh, okay, okay. And they're like, okay, I'm done fucking you. And then they walk over your body.

[A]

That's what they do.

[B]

So that's what happened, it seems like.

[C]

Because if someone calls, so the business happens. How many times in your career has somebody like, hey, can you come do this thing? It's no money, but on the next thing, it'll be it. Has there ever been a next thing? No, never.

[A]

Never been a next thing. I did this one thing which was a miracle. I did a table read.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

You're right. You're not cast. You're not. You're just doing a favor. And you. You can. You do it? And I'm like, I looked at who was in it and what the movie was, and I was like, all right, I'll do it. And I got cast from the table read. That's the only time that's ever happened.

[E]

Or I think there are some situations where you just happen to be. To say yes to something small and you meet someone there just by chance that leads to something else, which is like, number. You met Gene Hong.

[A]

That's the one time it's happened.

[E]

Yes. You went to Hawaii for a small. A small part in a movie.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And then you just happened to run into someone else who was also filming there, and then he actually got you on that show.

[A]

Yeah. So that's happened.

[C]

But, like, the truth is.

[A]

Maybe you're not open enough.

[C]

No, the truth is, like, people are

[A]

the mysteries of life.

[C]

Eat. Eat this bull of Bobby. And you're like, I don't want to eat this bullshit.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

There's a line of people around the block willing to eat this bullshit, Bobby.

[A]

I know.

[C]

And you're like, okay, I'll eat it. And then you eat it. You choke it down. They're like, good boy. Good boy.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And they come around again. They're like, I need to eat another bullshit. I don't want to.

[A]

I know.

[C]

You already did. I know. You can do it.

[A]

I know.

[C]

And you're like, but I already ate the bullshit. And then you're. You're sitting there next to 10 empty bowls of shit. You're like, I'm sick.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, that's exactly what it is.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But let me ask you this, though. I mean, you were a series regular on Mom.

[C]

Yes. Chuck Lor's the best.

[A]

I love Chuck. I met him.

[C]

The best.

[A]

The best, right?

[C]

He.

[E]

He.

[A]

How long. How long did that go?

[C]

I did mom for four years. And then. Then I went off and I did another show, and Then Chuck came to me and offered me another show, and then I did this show called Bob Hart's Habit show for five. So I did nine years of Chuck Lorre, and he said he'd bring back, and he did and was like, yeah,

[A]

so it does happen. Yeah. But relationships.

[C]

No, but I auditioned in the beginning for mom, for a serious regular role, and I was given something equal later. Right.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Like, I know he. I never did Chuck a favor. He did me a favor.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

The whole time. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It never really built. It was just this thing that always was. Right.

[A]

Yeah. So you're in the Chuck Lorre camp.

[C]

I'm in the Chuck Lorre universe. Yeah.

[A]

In the universe, yeah. Yeah. So could you live off that money?

[C]

No.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[C]

I could have at one time.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But that. When I got on to. Yeah. I mean, if you want to get into the minutiae of it, I. I didn't have any. What's the word? Leverage. And I didn't get a huge amount of money.

[A]

Oh, your quote. Your quote was low.

[C]

Low. Very low. When I started a mom, and it never got up. And then I left the show.

[A]

Could you, like.

[C]

I never got that big payday.

[A]

Oh, you never did. Yeah. Because at that time, it changed.

[C]

It had changed. So all those Big Bang guys got those. That huge.

[A]

Yeah, I heard you talk about that.

[C]

And they spun around and said, everybody else, that's not happening again.

[A]

And then in life, that will never happen again.

[C]

I. I don't think it's really going to happen again.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

They'll just cancel the show. We'll make a different show.

[A]

Well, the numbers don't add up, though, anymore.

[C]

They don't.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'm not blaming anybody for that. Like, there's not the money to give us.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Asking for, you know, 500 grand an episode. Anybody gets that is. You're gonna kill your show. But if they can afford to give you it. Yeah. Take it when it's there.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But it's not there. That money's not there anymore.

[A]

It's not there anymore. Yeah. Yeah. So structurally, is it the hobbit's fault?

[C]

No, it's. It's the.

[A]

When I say the Hobbit.

[E]

Hobbit.

[A]

What? Who's the Hobbit? Sean Aston.

[C]

No.

[A]

Okay. Okay.

[C]

No.

[A]

He's a president of After.

[E]

Oh, no, no.

[C]

He walked into a situation that's been bad for decades.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

It's just gotten worse and worse.

[A]

I want to blame the hobbit, but I don't think I can.

[E]

No.

[C]

The merger between SAG and Afro was like.

[A]

You think Aragorn was like, you know, I mean, the president of sag, that it would.

[C]

No, maybe he is.

[E]

He is bilingual.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, he could do some fucking deals with the elves.

[E]

No, not just that. He speaks Spanish too.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, the actor.

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Oh, the actor.

[E]

Aragorna.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, the character. I see he speaks Elvis.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, some dwarves. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Anyway, no, this situation has been eroding for decades.

[A]

It's been eroding for four decades. Yeah, well, I think the emergence of the Internet and the emergence of streaming, the emergence of. I mean, I think network television is pretty much dead. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, the years. I mean, the years where we were doing it, like, because, you know, I was on. I think I've been on three series that got picked up, that actually aired. You know what I mean? In those days, I was like, oh, if this continues, this will be good. But also like, it was 22 episodes a year.

[C]

But that, that when you got that hit, you were like, let's say. Let's. Let's just say you got a 22 episode a year and you're gonna get 40,000 an episode, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Which is really actor math. Like 20 grand an episode if you're lucky. If you get 50%, probably only get 33%.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Because of agent, manager, lawyer, that's 25% off before taxes and then they tax you on the gross. It's. So you're getting like 35%, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So you're not even getting 40 an episode. You're getting like. Yeah, like. Like I said, like maybe 18. Yeah, but times 22. That's a lot of money. And back in the day when you could go to the fanciest restaurant in Hollywood and only spend 200 bucks. Oh, man.

[A]

Yeah, that's.

[C]

You're living huge.

[A]

Huge.

[C]

You could get a $300,000 house in North Hollywood.

[A]

Yes, back then. Back then, yes.

[C]

Now it's $2 million for a house and you're getting paid less per episode. And they're only doing 10 episodes.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And going to dinner anywhere in LA is $400.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And also the restaurants suck.

[A]

Bath Mate. Oh, yeah. Bath Mate. So wet Bath Mate.

[C]

Take my pants off.

[A]

Bath Mate. You guys, My penis is larger. Just add water. You know, let's cut the crap. If you could have a bigger, harder, long lasting erection, you take it, Right?

[B]

Yeah, absolutely.

[A]

Am I not right? So why aren't you using Bathmate yet? I use it.

[E]

I'm looking at this box and it's quite the contraption. It's an impressive contraption. And you can see Bobby, there's like the little tape measure.

[A]

I know, I use it and I do the bottom one here. Yeah, yeah. But now it's at the second level.

[C]

Do you think that you can get

[E]

up to this right here when you're outside?

[A]

No, no, no, no.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

That's crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm not Eric Andre, but anyway, meet Bathmate, the number one hydro powered penis pump that actually delivers results. This isn't some gimmick. It's science backed, proven and used by guys worldwide who want better performance and a partner who can't get enough.

[E]

It's more size, more girth, more confidence.

[B]

You get better, longer lasting erections. Your partner will feel the difference. You're going to be harder, stronger performance every single time. How do you know that, Luke? Well, all you have to do is just use it a few minutes a day when you shower and then you just watch what happens in the bedroom. Your partner's reaction. It's going to be priced.

[A]

It really does work. I use, I've been using it and

[E]

it's like a pancake. It's just add water.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Right now, Bathmate is giving our listeners up to 20% off when you use code belly@bathmate direct.com belly that's bathmate direct. B A T H M A T E D I R e c t.com belly use code belly for up to 20% off. Go to bathmate direct.com belly use code belly and upgrade your sex life today. Luke link is in the episode description.

[D]

You're listening to this podcast, so I know you've got a curious mind. Here's a helpful fact you might not know yet. Drivers who switch and save with Progressive save over $900 on average. Pop over to progressive.com, answer some questions and you'll get a quick quote with discounts that are easy to come by. In fact, 99% of their auto customers earn at least one discount. Visit progressive.com and see if you can enjoy a little cash back. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. National average 12 month savings of $946 by new customers surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2024 and May 2025. Potential savings will vary. Ever wonder who's out there making the world go round? It's truckers. Who unites baristas with coffee beans? Truckers. Who unites dogs with their favorite chew toy? Truckers. That's why Progressive offers Truckers Even more protection with cargo plus coverage to keep truckers moving right along with quote truck insurance today in as little as 8 minutes at progressivecommercial.com progressive casualty insurance company and affiliates. Coverage subject to policy terms, limits and conditions not yet available in California, New York and Virginia.

[E]

When it's time to scale your business, it's time for shopify. Get everything you need to grow the way you want. Like all the way. Stack more sales with the best converting checkout on the planet. Track your cha chings from every channel right in one spot. And turn real time reporting into big time opportunities. Take your business to a whole new level. Switch to Shopify. Start your free trial today. This is a paid message from GoFundMe. Meet Juan Naula. When his son was hospitalized for a viral infection, Juan started a GoFundMe to pay for medical expenses.

[A]

It was 5k to pay the bill for my son and I need only 22 hours. It was amazing. People really trust on GoFundMe.

[E]

How did Juan raise $5,000 in less than a day? He posted a short video on GoFundMe telling his story in 30 seconds.

[A]

30 seconds. Be specific. Be quick and tell. What are you gonna be using the funds for? I was nervous to do it because it doesn't feel okay to ask money. But you shouldn't be nervous. Sometimes you just have to do it and see the results. We were able to save my son's life thanks to gofundme that we still have my son with us.

[E]

Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's gofundme.com gofundme.com this message reflects one person's experience.

[A]

What do you mean?

[E]

In la?

[A]

In la.

[C]

No, I just.

[A]

Have you been to Damien?

[C]

Yeah, sure. There are good westerns.

[E]

Damien is not Damien.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

What do you mean? Damian's so good.

[E]

It's a sexy bar, but the food itself is mid.

[A]

Yeah, okay.

[C]

My wife's a great cook. We eat better at home than most restaurants.

[E]

If you have a wife who is a great cook, there's really nothing beating.

[C]

It really is.

[A]

I don't know.

[E]

There's.

[A]

I disagree. They're. They're. They're good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Remember you took me to Major Domo for the first time?

[C]

Yeah. That was good.

[A]

Yeah, that was really good. Yeah. Really good. My point being is, is that that's all I get.

[E]

You eat the up front.

[A]

I do the. I order. I. Oh, yeah. I leave halfway during the movie.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Like disclosure day.

[C]

You walked Out. Walked out.

[A]

I don't walk. I haven't seen it yet, but I hear people. I see a lot of tiktoks going, yeah, we walked out.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

But there are also other tiktokers that are like, you know what I mean? It changed my life. So I'm going to watch it Wednesday.

[C]

Did you see the Fabelmans?

[A]

No. Good.

[C]

No.

[A]

Oscar nominated. It was bad.

[C]

Yeah. But I love his other movies. But, boy, that movie. Yikes.

[A]

Yeah. Really?

[C]

I'm talking myself out of job. I love this.

[A]

No, no. I don't know. You're not. I think that we're in the age of being honest.

[C]

Honest. Okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And your opinion. Who cares?

[E]

Yeah. Who gives a shit about the Fableman?

[C]

Yeah, who gives a shit?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But also you're like complaining about your not getting job. Jobs, everything. Like what job? Wait, I can name one show. One show on tv. Right. Or two shows.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That I would love to be.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Outside of that, I don't care.

[A]

Yeah, I don't care.

[E]

What do you think? Okay. In the spirit of honesty, okay, who are the top three women and top three male actors who are taking up too many roles and who should quit?

[A]

Not.

[C]

I don't think anybody should.

[A]

I don't think Andrew quit. But I think that some people should go, you know what? I have enough.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Too much saturated. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. There's too much Nicole Kidman. We all know that.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So every month it is.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

Before you see a movie, you see her face.

[C]

And I went off on that on this other podcast and I. And like, like, when is enough enough? I get it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But also, like, I don't know, maybe she's crazy and she is taking whatever she can get because in her head it'll all go away. That's fine.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't blame her. I blame the. This industry that is like me think that all of her means something. Do you know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Just her is the only way your show could succeed. Well, that's crazy.

[A]

But the proof is obsession. No stars.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

The movie is making. Gonna make hundreds of millions.

[C]

Widow's Bay.

[A]

I heard it's great.

[E]

That's what I heard.

[C]

I'm not kidding. It's one of the best shows I've ever seen.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Unbelievable.

[E]

Is it like Twin Peaks?

[C]

Love it is Twin Peaks. If Twin Peaks was made by someone, it's better than Twin Peaks.

[E]

I'm sorry, Really?

[C]

I just re. Watched Twin Peaks and this is.

[A]

It's just so I'm watching it tonight.

[C]

It's got Coen Brothers feel.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I love the Cohen, but also, like, it's so good. And Katie Dibbled, who wrote and created it. She's UCB person.

[A]

I know.

[C]

She's a writer, right? And she.

[A]

She wrote on MAD TV for a year.

[C]

I know she had to write that show. And now she's on Widow's Bay now. She's created, like, one of the best shows.

[A]

What do you mean that, man? God damn.

[C]

First time I ever met Bobby.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah.

[C]

I want to say 2004 or 5.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I was back home from Amsterdam and I had a bunch of friends working on MAD and I, like, hung out backstage or like, afterparty thing, and Bobby cornered me and told me some of the most fucked up stories I've ever heard in my life. She said. And I, like, walked away. And Colton's like, hey, you all right, man? I was like, I don't know, man. He told me some. The fuck did you say?

[E]

He calls him his deepest darkies. His deepy darkies.

[C]

That was really funny.

[A]

I mean, I mean, I've heard that before where people like Eric Andre always says that. Man. You used to tell me the weirdest fucked up stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

No, but like, mad was. But SNL and mad suck 85.

[A]

All right, it sucks.

[C]

No, they suck 85% of the time, but the 15% that's good is really, really good.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Just keep it on the table, Matt. Jesus Christ.

[C]

I have to clean up.

[E]

You have that.

[C]

I don't know if it's like, you

[E]

know what it is.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

You're a working man.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

You're not out of touch.

[C]

You're not out of touch.

[A]

Yeah. He's got it. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, thank you.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

It gives me.

[A]

There are people that I look on the billboards, I go, him again. Him again.

[E]

But like, who? Like, who? I want to know.

[A]

I think Nick Offerman works a lot.

[C]

He does.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

But he also. He does. Small enough. Yeah. Not all about him.

[E]

Yeah. He's not doing like, every single big.

[C]

Like, he does work a lot.

[E]

He does work a lot.

[A]

He works a lot. He's very talented. In fact, if I had a project and I was doing it, I would try to make. Give him an offer.

[C]

But like, the biggest name on Widows Bay is Matthew Reese.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Who in the industry is a name? But like, it.

[E]

It.

[C]

People don't know who he is in the world.

[A]

I don't think it matters anymore.

[C]

I don't think it does. I'm saying this show is proof.

[A]

Obsession is Proof, like back rooms.

[C]

Yeah. You don't need these massive stars. Just do something that's good and interesting. I mean, even Adam Scott is kind of a name, but, like. Yeah, well, what's the name of the show?

[B]

Severance.

[C]

Severance. You know, they're not relying on these huge stars.

[A]

Yeah, they're not. Yeah, yeah. I think. I think it's the content and it's the originality. I mean, these new. These repeated ips that they keep doing, I think that's terrible.

[C]

Yeah, Yeah.

[A]

I mean, we're making. You know, I mean, they remember. They remade Total Recall.

[C]

Why?

[A]

I don't know even why you would remake Total Recall.

[C]

Why would you remake.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, it was terrible.

[B]

I've only seen the remake, so I don't really know.

[C]

You've only seen the remake? Oh, my God.

[B]

I didn't even know it was a remake until years later.

[A]

The original generation. We got to kill him.

[C]

The original Paul Verhoeven.

[B]

Yeah, I like.

[C]

So perfect.

[A]

It was so perfect.

[C]

It's so.

[A]

It's so good.

[C]

Dumb and great.

[A]

Yeah, it's dumb and great. Fuck, yeah.

[C]

Three boobs.

[A]

What?

[C]

You made me wish. I.

[A]

There's three boobs in the original.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Well, there's in the remake, too.

[C]

Good movie. Does he say. Does he say in the remake, does he say, you make me wish I had three hands?

[B]

I. Maybe. I think so.

[C]

You'd remember.

[A]

I don't know. The three boobs in the original is much better. Boob.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. They're plump.

[C]

Yeah. And like Sharon Stone.

[A]

Look at this thing. Look at this.

[B]

That's a movie right there.

[C]

And also, I don't blame Colin Farrell. I love Colin Farrell.

[A]

He's killing it too.

[C]

But Colin Farrell, now, like, post I haveboy. Colin Farrell is so much better.

[E]

Yeah, I think so, too.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

And that's one of the other things is everything is either boys, like, just. It's nothing but like these gore.

[A]

Like you think, Shalom, Jacob Elordis.

[C]

They're just so attractive.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

If you go back and watch 80s and 90s movies, nobody is that attractive. You're not allowed to be the lead of a movie. Or if you're that attractive because it's too distracting.

[E]

Right.

[C]

Like girls and guys.

[E]

Even if you look at all of the John Hughes movies, like, none of them, like, what's his name? The guy from Pretty in Pink. He was so okay, but just cute.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Or even like James Spader and Sixteen Candles. Yeah. Like, he's like the bad guy. He would be Played by the hottest guy ever now.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Whereas back then you have a weird ass guy like James Spader that's so much more fun to watch.

[E]

Although you do have like the Barry Keegan. Keegan, yeah.

[A]

Coogan.

[C]

Coogan, sure. But he's not in these. He's.

[A]

Well, he's in that. He's the Batman. The new Batman.

[E]

Yeah. Saltburn with Jacob.

[C]

Right. But these are.

[A]

Here's my theory on that. Let me just hear finish. So if you watch. I've said this before.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

If you watch the movie E.T.

[E]

yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And you look at. He was the. I think, I think Spielberg is the master of making a house look like an everyday house.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

So if you look in the house, things are just disheveled, chaotic. You know what I mean? It feels real.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

The, the rooms are only lit by the lights that are in.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

It's not like this bright ass room even close counters.

[A]

If you see the house there, it feels real. Now if you watch a house in a movie, it looks like it's like for sale and it's like, you know, I mean a IKEA showroom looking house. It doesn't look real. The people don't look real. It's like I think in the 80s they ch. They. They booked real looking people that people could relate to.

[E]

I feel like a lot of the UK shows still do that.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're ugly as I, I would have anybody in that in those shows.

[C]

I love an ugly actor.

[A]

Me too.

[C]

You're a great actor.

[A]

You're going to get work.

[B]

A lot of work.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm ugly. Ugly. Well, you are ugly.

[C]

I'm Hollywood.

[A]

You're so ugly.

[E]

You're.

[A]

No, I think you're ugly. I don't think you're. I think you're good looking now.

[C]

I know, but I'm Hollywood ugly, right?

[A]

You are Hollywood ugly.

[C]

You know I'm Hollywood ugly.

[A]

You're Midwest hot though.

[C]

I'm a Midwest eight.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I'm a Hollywood four.

[A]

Yeah. No, no, no. But you're the. You're you. But there's something about your face where you're. You seem like a happy guy and you're.

[C]

Oh. On film.

[A]

On film. Not now, not as a person, but. Yeah, yeah. I mean. Cause I've worked with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which was a grueling. The most grueling. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

It wasn't great.

[A]

It wasn't great. And what conspired after that was just really devastating and it enraged me. It arranges me yeah, Yeah.

[C]

I do have a thing now where people ask me to do something. I'm like, well, if you make something else, then I have to be involved also. I'm not doing this shit for free.

[E]

Get that shit on paper.

[A]

I'm going to get on paper next time, too. Yeah, because he. This dude told us when we make the movie, you guys are going to be in it. This fool told us that.

[C]

Yeah. And then he saw, like, a commercial for something, a 24, and he just jerked off and.

[A]

Yeah, that's the guy.

[E]

Did you get replaced by Charles Melton?

[A]

No. If it was Charles, because I know Charles.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

I'd be honored.

[E]

Okay.

[C]

Who's supposed to replace me over yet?

[A]

They haven't even cast that yet.

[C]

Oh, right.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Be someone really hot. Like, that guy's gorgeous.

[E]

Oh, I see.

[B]

That whole thing kind of ruined Project Hail Mary for me. Honestly.

[A]

What?

[B]

Ryan Gosling does not seem like a scientist teacher. They're like, he's like, me, I could never do it. And he's in, like, a little cardigan, but he has, like, perfect hair and perfect highlights and all this stuff. And he's supposed to be, like, a school teacher that they just find one

[A]

of the greatest actors of our generation,

[C]

he in the movie. But you do have a point.

[B]

It was like, this is so. They're like. He's like, little old me. It's like, you're, like the hottest guy ever. I feel like you'd walk in and be like, who the is this?

[C]

You know, who would play him be in Project Hail Mary if he was made in, like, 1985? Richard Drus.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, like a B guy who's a real piece of. In real life.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, if we want to go all Hollywood, I can tell you who the pieces of. You want me to say something?

[E]

I don't want you to ruin Richard Dreyfus for me.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I'll throw a name out. He's an excellent Alan Hunt.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

Oh, boy. Have you. Have you has yet?

[C]

No, no, no, no.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

To your point about, like, not believing Ryan Gosling, you know, there's this whole, like, sentiment around not casting anyone who's done any body modifications in any historical pieces.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Like, I think that that has to be true because it's like, you see these, like, even they did a show about Stevie Nicks and, you know, and they cast girls with, you know, lip fillers, and it just does not look right. Like, you can tell.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And it's just. It takes you out of the whole era altogether.

[A]

Yeah, totally. Yeah. But it's all just to sell products. It is, yeah, it's all to sell products.

[C]

So, like, if you want to be in this TV show or movie, whatever the fuck it is.

[A]

What are you talking about?

[C]

Like, I'm saying you want to act, you're complaining.

[A]

I'm doing a movie in July.

[C]

Great.

[A]

And what you.

[C]

This.

[A]

I never read it. I don't know what my part is. Right. They just go, do you want to do this movie? I go, how much is it? And they tell me the number and I go, okay, I'll do it. You want to read it?

[D]

No.

[A]

Sure. No one's going to see it.

[C]

Fair.

[A]

Yeah. So that's what, that's where I'm at.

[B]

This is not good promo for you.

[C]

But also, like, I'm sure it's great.

[A]

I'm sure it's going to be great.

[C]

The realization I came to with all of this is like, let's say the greatest movie or the greatest TV show ever. Like, in my wildest dreams, what's going to happen? Right. Okay. I'm doing really well. And then I get nominated for. For an Emmy and I win an Emmy. And I'm standing on the stage and I go, oh, thank you for Miami.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then I go home and then there's a bunch of phone calls for all of these new products and shows. And now I'm gonna have tons of money.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, great. Everything's great. And I'm not gonna see my kids as much because I'm gone all the time.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I was gonna tear apart my relationship with my wife. It absolutely. I. I get you want to.

[A]

Why is that funny?

[C]

Show me a list of all 40 different famous people that used to be happy, just that aren't because they're famous now. I'll tell you why.

[B]

It just took such a turn so quickly. It's like the driving through the Palisade story.

[C]

God damn, kid. Welcome to the real world. The real world, dude takes a turn real quickly. All of a sudden you blow up, Right? So I'm, I'm, I'm. I try not to concentrate on how shitty it all is right now.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Like, just jobs that come and go and me being that, like mid range kind of like, I'm just in stuff. I want to be Nick Offerman, right?

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

I don't need to be in the front.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I'm already the main character in my life.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I got a beautiful wife and two kids. I'm doing great.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't need to be the main character in your shitty thing that sells boner pills anyway.

[A]

Let's move on. Uncomfortable.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

What?

[C]

What's what?

[A]

What?

[C]

I didn't say anything.

[B]

She's talking about blowing up.

[A]

Yeah. Go ahead, tell the story.

[E]

Because I really want to want Matt to weigh in. So I had to feel the very distressed phone call from his pool guy because he's like, I don't know what this is, but, like, I've been coming here every single week. I'm doing everything I can, but, like, the pool is brown.

[A]

Black.

[E]

Black. I was on that phone call.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

It's like, pool is brown. There's something in here. And, you know, he was, like, losing his mind, being like, I don't know what I did. He thought he was at fault.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, it was my fault.

[E]

Only to find out that Bobby has picked up a new hobby of distressing T shirts, and he was pouring coffee into his pool, this beautiful pool. He wanted to stain the shirt. And I want to ask you guys if you think that that's out of touch or artistic.

[C]

I think it's just stupid.

[E]

No.

[A]

Eccentric.

[C]

It's just stupid.

[A]

No. Eccentric.

[C]

Yeah, it's just like, that's a dumb thing to do, and then you learn from it.

[B]

What gave you the idea to use the. You didn't have, like, a bucket or something? Or, like, a bathtub?

[A]

Yeah, I have buckets now.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

He learned.

[A]

I learned. See, that's the moral of this podcast. And there's always a story to be told. Right. And the story and the moral of this podcast is you learn. Learn.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You make a mistake and you learn. Yeah. And guess what? The pool is clear now. Okay.

[C]

Do you ever go in it?

[A]

I do. I went in there yesterday. Yeah. You know, I'm living in a. Almost retirement age.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. I'm. I'm headed toward, like, figuring things out so that I can get out.

[C]

I've been going to a lot of friends. 50th birthday parties.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And it is a weird deal.

[A]

Yeah. How old are you now?

[C]

I am almost 45.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

And it's weird.

[A]

Yeah, it's not weird.

[C]

No, no. It's just weird that, like, I'm watch. I have a lot of friends have died recently.

[A]

I had a dark friend die yesterday.

[C]

Yeah. Like, all different reasons. And you're just like, I just can't give a shit anymore. About what? About what people think.

[A]

Oh, I thought you thought I used

[C]

to be worried about what people think, and I just am not.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm at a point where I don't give a shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know that when I saw some of the videos that were popping up with you. Right. It was very interesting because perception, wives wise, I always thought that, oh, Matt Jones is killing it. And I had an envy almost about you, you know, I mean, and then I was like, it was very interesting to see that other guy named Kirk Avedido gave Acevedo whatever he was talking about. Acevedo. He was also talking about how he has to move and this and that. And then it became. I started having real deep empathy for people that I, you know, and that are great actors that I've always not envied, but I was like, good for them, you know? And it's like, it's so interesting to watch something die, you know? You know, it's so interesting to see this thing that I spent my whole life reaching for and desiring and working my cause. We've been through some fires.

[E]

Sure.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, we went through some pain and some fire to get here, you know what I mean? And for it to die is very, very interesting, you know, And a kid like this, you know what I mean, who has the same desires as we did. How old are you now?

[B]

25.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, 25. Yeah. And. And it's like, why are you smiling?

[B]

I don't know. Why are you laughing at it?

[C]

So when I was 25. So I booked my first episode of Breaking Bad when I was 25.

[B]

Oh, great. I'm already behind 20 years.

[C]

No, but at that point, I had already been trying to work for eight years, seven years, because I started 18. I didn't go to college because I'm not a rich kid. No, but like I'm saying, like so much has happened like that since then in that past 20 years. Like some people, I was on the street the other day and a guy's like, you know, hey, man, you got any meth?

[E]

Or whatever?

[C]

And I'm with my, my kids and my wife and.

[A]

Oh, because of the show.

[C]

Yeah. Because they think I'm the same person I was 20 years ago. Right.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That perception is going to be with me forever, River.

[A]

Yeah, right. Yeah.

[C]

So I'm still kind of stuck in this 25 year old thing. Sometimes I get really angry about it because I'm like, other things have happened in 20 years.

[A]

I draw, I'm walking down the street and people will yell, yell out, oh, hot dog.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Which is a sketch I did. Yeah. And it, it puts the children, or

[C]

they call you Mrs. Swan, you're like, that wasn't even me. I know.

[A]

I've gotten that. It, too.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I. How do you know that happens to me? Yeah.

[C]

Cause I can guess. Yeah, you can guess because by the way, the Venn diagram of mad TV fans and Breaking Bad fans, I mean, it's really.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

A lot of, like, teenage Hispanic boys.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. It really is. Yeah. Yeah. Which is a good thing.

[C]

It's a great thing.

[A]

It's a great thing. Yeah. And then it was interesting to see you talk about the conventions. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And, you know, it's. The conventions is what we call. Luke, stay in tune.

[B]

I'm listening.

[A]

The conventions are basically us going on the road. You know what I mean? It's like road dates, and it's like. I mean, oh, I got to be in Cleveland. You know what I mean? To do something is pretty much. And actors do that to make some extra cash. It's like personal appearance. And your personal appearance person does that from your agency. Right. The same person that does your comedy, that does probably the comedy bookings as well, you know, so it's interesting to see how that. Because even when I go on the road, you know, I sold 5,000 tickets in Toronto. But my point is, is that, you know, but. But still. Just let me get it. Let me just get my laugh.

[C]

What the fuck?

[A]

Anyway, the convention scene has died as well. You've done them.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

What is it like?

[C]

Well, it was. I haven't done a ton, but what do you do?

[A]

You sit there at a booth.

[C]

Sit at a table.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And there's a thing behind you and it says, like, Matt Jones. And it maybe lists the shows I've been on.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And people like. I mean, it's. It's just everything. It's. You have people that are £700 or. Or like the hottest girl you've ever seen.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Like, it's just all white walks of America. America.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And they walk by and they go, oh, oh, you're in. Huh? And then they keep walking and you see it all day long. And I'm sitting next to people that are Oscar winner types all the time.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I. And no one's doing well Right. Anymore. I mean, they're.

[A]

So how do you make the money? So they wait in line.

[C]

Animation's doing well. Like, if you're like the Voice on one piece, you're doing great.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Mikhail is doing great.

[A]

Yeah. So they. So they wait in line and they. And how do you make the money?

[C]

Okay, so there'll be A thing that says, like, selfie, not to price. I don't know what people's prices are.

[A]

What's your price?

[C]

I. I honestly don't know. It changed per convention.

[A]

Let me guess.

[C]

Okay, selfies. How much?

[A]

I would. Five bucks.

[C]

No, it was like, 30 bucks.

[A]

Are you on your mind? I take selfies every day. I take free.

[C]

I take selfies for free. Always.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So only if I'm at that table would I charge for it, because everybody

[A]

difference between it being inside a building and outside a building.

[C]

Everybody else is charging for it. And you're fucking the people out of their money if you're doing it for free, because you're lowering the entire thing.

[A]

So everyone's $30.

[C]

Oh, 30 is the cheapest.

[A]

Oh, that's.

[C]

Some people are like, a hundred first.

[E]

How much would you charge Bobby for an indoor selfie?

[A]

Free.

[E]

No, no, you.

[A]

If I'm at a convention.

[E]

Yeah. You have to set a price.

[C]

You have to go there, be free.

[A]

I believe the bottom of whatever the bottom is.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

If it's $30, then probably $30.

[C]

So what it is. It's like 30 bucks.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

There you go. This is like an animation selfie is 40. For AJ Luc, the voice of Gambit from the 90s, that's a selfie. That's $40.

[A]

So autograph, print, 60. I do that for free.

[C]

And then the combos.

[A]

Autograph selfie, 80, voice recording, 70. Premium item. 80. Wow. Well, who's the cheapest in there? Oh, here we go. Alpha Takahashi. She charges $20, premium item. Wow. So that's how they make their money. Yeah, I have no. I don't know anything about that world,

[B]

but have you considered doing, like, improv shows? Like, you have this whole other skill set that, like, might be more fun than improv shows where, like, you're saying that you only do three or four improv shows a year or something. But maybe you could, like. Do you ever consider doing stuff like that instead of, like, a convention thing? That seems kind of.

[C]

You just don't make money that way, people. It's just not a thing.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's the thing.

[C]

I could go. I literally could. I. I've had off. I could do stand up. Right. And that is a hard, hard life. It's really hard work.

[A]

How do you know?

[C]

Because every. Because you're just gone all the time. How many. How many nights a week would you say he should go do sets?

[A]

How many nights do you do a week?

[B]

Like, I try to do every night.

[C]

Yeah, that's every single Night.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That's hard.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Any job. But we're doing something every single night. That's hard. I put my kids to bed.

[A]

But it's, you know. But it's fun.

[C]

Yeah, Absolutely.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Absolutely.

[A]

But you're in a different situation. What I would say to you is, is that I think it would be fun if you got a set together. You said you have 10.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Get 25. And then, like, you know, if I do a theater date or something.

[C]

Let's do it.

[A]

Just come do it.

[C]

You know what I mean?

[A]

And then. And I think that, you know, I could. Can I make some suggestions?

[C]

Absolutely.

[A]

And you'll be open.

[C]

I'm listening.

[A]

Because I feel.

[C]

I'll tell you to off.

[A]

I feel like a defense system's going up. Because I did text you. I did text you some stuff. And then you didn't.

[C]

About a podcast.

[A]

I know, I know. So it's like, you know, I feel like there's just some defenses going up, and you're like this guy. I'm trying to help you.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean? I think that you're a talent. You're my friend, and I'm trying to fucking help you.

[C]

All right.

[A]

All right. I'm taking it. I don't want any defense. Okay. That's all. So shut the fuck up. I know. So there's a couple things I want to say. Okay. So number one is why don't you do sketches with your friend online and put them out? There's some sketches people that don't. Never even heard of, from the Midwest that I follow, and I love their sketches.

[C]

Yeah. There's a couple really funny accounts.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So, you know, I mean, you have that skill set.

[C]

Have you watched Cheese Parade?

[A]

No, they're good.

[C]

I'm obsessed with them.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. So I'll look up Cheese Parade. Write that down for me. Cheese Parade. And that's number one. I don't see you doing that.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And I think that you can, you know, figure out, you know, it's cheap, not a lot of money. It's just the writing.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And who you do it with. Yeah, yeah. And they don't have to be long.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So that's one thing. I know. It feels like you're selling out, and it feels like desperation.

[C]

No, no, no. It just feels like a younger man's game.

[A]

It's not a younger man.

[C]

Yeah. It just feels like that's what he should be doing.

[A]

No, no. There's these 70.

[C]

And to be fair, I've had. I've Been busy working on jobs for a while. And now.

[A]

Well, that was the problem.

[C]

No, no, no, no. But now I'm not. And now I need to listen to shit like this.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

And take this advice. Absolutely.

[A]

So I would, number one, do that. Okay. And number two, you have improv skills. And I. I could. I will be fairly honest with you right now. No, I'll be completely honest. Yeah, yeah. Not fairly. What I want to say is. The thing is, is that I. I. There's some. And what. What's it called? Bobby Isms. Is that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I hate doing that. Anyway. Anyways. Another one. It's one of my transitions. There's a lot of things that are glaring, but let me. I'm just going through my own little.

[C]

I was listening to myself in that podcast I did, and I said like 10,000 times.

[A]

I know. I remember.

[C]

It's horrible.

[A]

Yeah. So the second thing is, you know how to add information.

[E]

You.

[A]

You're good with the silence, and I think that you have the skill set to do it, because when I watched you do that podcast, the couple of podcasts, I'm like, oh, this guy. It's very interesting. You know, so. And you can be funny on these. It's tape recorded. You're just having conversations with people.

[B]

Tape recorded.

[E]

I like.

[B]

Sorry, continue.

[A]

No. Why'd you giggle at that?

[B]

I just. I've never heard that. Even said tape recorded.

[A]

What?

[C]

That's. That's what a tape is. I'm showing him.

[B]

Oh, I know what it is. Yeah.

[A]

It's. It's digitally recorded. You know, I mean.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Through complex systems.

[E]

This is why I bought my son a real telephone where he can actually do this.

[B]

Oh.

[E]

So that he doesn't. I make him say, hello. Hello. And he's learning this instead of this.

[C]

This.

[E]

Because I'm afraid of tape recorded.

[A]

Yeah, but he's gonna be doing this.

[E]

I don't care. He's gonna learn analog first.

[A]

Yeah, but that doesn't exist.

[E]

It does.

[A]

It's like teaching your son to do this.

[E]

Nope. Nope.

[A]

Which is like sword fighting.

[E]

I think people are going back.

[A]

What's the point?

[E]

Nope.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Isn't it funny now we're in a place where you want him to be doing this, like, because kids aren't doing that anymore. Do you know that?

[E]

They're not.

[C]

Are you drinking off?

[B]

Yeah, I try to jerk off as much as I can.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, you do.

[B]

Yeah. Just hard to find. Find time, you know, I have a busy schedule.

[C]

Jesus Christ.

[A]

What do you mean? Open mics? Are getting busy.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So the rest of the three. I mean, 23 hours, you have no time.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, jerking off nowadays takes like, you know, five or six hours. Really?

[C]

What?

[B]

That's.

[C]

That's.

[B]

That's what everyone's doing, you know?

[A]

Oh, they edge it. Yeah.

[B]

You gotta edge. You have to.

[C]

You don't have to do that.

[A]

You don't have to do it.

[C]

Everybody jumps off a cliff.

[A]

Yeah. You don't have to.

[C]

You just jerk off in five minutes.

[E]

Just edging is like. That's all the rage.

[B]

Yeah. You know, that's what everybody's into these days.

[A]

That's just, you know.

[E]

But I think the health benefits from actual.

[B]

Yeah, that's what you have to do.

[A]

What? I understand that. That I'm sure, because I. I rarely masturbate, and I.

[B]

That's great.

[A]

Okay. Because I have a girlfriend now.

[B]

Congrats.

[A]

So the other day, I. I had to, you know, the spirit.

[C]

You mean you were moved by.

[A]

I was moved by something.

[B]

That's the devil. That's the devil on your shoulder.

[A]

Okay. Anyway, I had the devil on my shoulder. Right. And I'm like, I'm gonna bang. I'm gonna bang one out quickly, you know? I mean, it took me about two minutes.

[E]

Minutes.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yes. I think two to five minutes is probably the time.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You can do it. Yeah. How long does it take you?

[C]

Yeah, we're on there.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Thank you.

[C]

Five minutes.

[A]

Maybe it's our age and our demographic. I don't know.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Generational.

[C]

I know how to get me off.

[A]

I know. You know? Yeah. I would do it through imagination.

[C]

No.

[A]

Okay, okay. Okay.

[C]

Come on. Cave paintings.

[A]

Yeah. I wonder what cave, like, cavemen did.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you think they were like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

And then a guy next to him made the boobs bigger, and he's like, oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

You know.

[A]

You know those books that you could tell a story? So you do a thousand of those, right? And you're just running and turning off, running and turning off. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

You think that's bad, though? You think it's bad? Are you saying it's better that kids are not jerking off or that they are. What was.

[C]

I think they need to want to get out of the house and have sex.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Right, right, right.

[C]

I think that's a good thing.

[A]

There's a. There's a male loneliness epidemic going on in their twenties. And it's all. I mean, just go to Scott Galloway. He can explain.

[C]

Yeah, I love Scott.

[A]

I love Scott Galloway, too.

[C]

And also this whole thing of, like, the amount of 25, like, young people thinking they need to be CEOs and, like, entrepreneurs and stuff is disgusting. Yeah. Hate it. What happened to just dorks, you know?

[A]

The dorks have been fucked. Yeah, yeah. The dorks have been. Because back in the day, dorks got laid.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

If you look at photos of. And I don't want to start a fight with you because I. I grew up. I don't want to start. I don't want to start a fight with you because I have fights with my little squabbles with my girlfriend about it.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Where I'm just telling her, right, that it's like, in the 70s, you could look at photos and you see a very attractive woman in a photo booth, like a JCPenney or photo. You know, those photo booths. Like Amelie.

[E]

Yeah, okay.

[A]

The Amelie type photo booth.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Do you understand?

[B]

Yes.

[E]

And then.

[A]

Right. And you'll see, like, an attractive woman with a dude that likes, like, could shoot up a school back, you know? Yeah, yeah. Like, they were, like, not that attractive. And they were like. They had a good factory job. They were nice to the woman, you know? And these factors no longer, you know, apply to modern dating and how, you know. That's all I'm saying.

[E]

I don't think that the onus is on the woman that you're.

[A]

See, that's exactly what I knew you were gonna say. And that's why pre. Did a pre. Warning.

[E]

Yeah. It's like, hey, ugly dudes get good, then.

[A]

No, no. How could an ugly dude get good?

[E]

There's so many ways. I dated an ugly dude for a very long time. I wasn't talking about you. They laughed.

[A]

They.

[E]

I. I wasn't talking about.

[A]

Yeah, it was definitely mad.

[E]

And I've had.

[A]

I know what you meant.

[E]

I think. No, but I wasn't. I wasn't even talking.

[A]

I am.

[E]

Okay. No, I wasn't talking about you.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm pretty juggling.

[E]

If you look at my history of people that I've dated. Yeah. It's like, from here to there, but that's you.

[A]

And you're a different gender.

[E]

But no, it's not. It's not a different generation. I truly think that's you. I think that men really need to understand that if you make a woman feel safe, if you're kind, if you can actually offset the fact that at some point she's going to have children and. And have some difficulty with her body, with her state of mind, if you just get good. I Promise you we're available.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

It's like. It's not, It's. That's. I'll stop there.

[C]

In my ugliest times, you know, I'm. I am the best looking I've ever been right now. For me.

[A]

I believe that.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But I was very ugly and I did quite well with women.

[A]

I believe that, too.

[C]

Long time.

[A]

Yep.

[C]

And it was just because I had the confidence to talk to them and like, not.

[A]

Yeah, but. Yeah, but okay.

[C]

And usually pick up women who had only been dating hot guys and they're like, I can't do that anymore because those guys are awful.

[A]

Yeah. There he is.

[D]

There he is.

[B]

For you, Cl.

[C]

Everything was vaguely lesbian.

[E]

So cute.

[B]

It's like the general manager at Lowe's or.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Did you play Kim?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You play lacrosse or something? I mean, what? That, that, that is crazy.

[E]

I don't know.

[C]

It's just 90s.

[A]

That shirt is cool. What. What kind of shirt is that?

[C]

My aunt worked in Nordstrom.

[E]

Oh, you have good hair.

[C]

Yeah, that was my. That was my first. One of my first headshots.

[A]

That's cool.

[E]

That's.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

This is the emergence of who you are.

[C]

That's when I booked like 12 commercials in a year.

[A]

That's another thing.

[C]

It's gone.

[A]

What year? I know it's gone. What year was that?

[C]

That would have been like 2003.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Like in the 90s. Oh, my. Luke. Miss the days.

[B]

I know. That's what everyone tells me. All I hear is that I completely missed the boat. People are still trying to do it. Do you do self tape? Like, I've never gone in person for an audition before.

[C]

Yeah, I only do self tapes. Yeah, I, I did a. Gosh, I, I. Yeah. I can't think of the last, like, in person audition I had.

[B]

Wow, that's crazy.

[C]

Yeah, because people.

[B]

I always hear people tell stories about, like, horrible audition things.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm always jealous of that, though. Yeah, that's real.

[A]

You bomb, though.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

I had this one where the character is supposed to be autistic.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And. And it was like.

[A]

I love it.

[C]

It was in Santa Monica in one of those, like, production companies. So it was like, next step, I'm at producers. Right. The room is filled with people, but it was in a room that you could hear outside of that room. And in the hallway are, like 10 guys. We all vaguely look the same in slightly different ways. And I could hear the guy before me crush. Yeah, he did fine.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

It wasn't a. It Wasn't a comedy thing. It was, like, slightly. It was a drama.

[A]

I. I didn't say what. Crush meaning. You know, it was a comedy thing. He. He was doing good.

[C]

Yeah. He was doing well.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I think. But how do you know a drama? They're not applauding, they're just quiet. Right? Yeah.

[A]

But you could hear him talk.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I think choice sounded really autistic.

[C]

He sounded fine. Right. So I was like. So I get in there and I go, hey. To the Caster. How autistic? Like, how far? Oh, you should really go for it. Just really go for it.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[C]

And it wasn't autistic. Like, it was like, I played, like. I don't think the better word. I played it very, like, very offensive.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

But not. But, like, traumatic. Like, I was like Leonardo DiCaprio.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

And Gilbert.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Like, really going.

[A]

You can't do.

[C]

Yeah. Better than that.

[A]

I was better than that.

[C]

And I came out of the room and I'm talking, and I was. And they were quiet. I come out of the room and I'm talking to a friend in the hallway, and I just hear, well, that was offensive.

[A]

Oh. Oh.

[C]

I went for it. And I missed.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Oh, my God.

[C]

And I don't think I saw that casting director much.

[A]

Yeah. Did you ever. Did you ever, like, freeze or.

[C]

No, No. I. I am more comfortable on stage or in, like, a stressful situation like that than I am anywhere else.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

You put me in front of 5, 000 people. I'm better there than I am one on one.

[A]

I used to freeze.

[C]

I never.

[A]

You never froze?

[C]

No.

[A]

Oh, God, no.

[C]

My wife actually asked me. My wife's an actress, very accomplished in her own right. She's like, do you ever have that dream where you don't know your lines? I was like, I've never had that dream where I don't know more my lines or I don't feel prepared or I'm scared. I've never had that dream as an actor.

[A]

So you've never been nervous a night before?

[C]

I've been nervous, but, like, it's like. Like, I'm more just anxious. I want to do it.

[A]

It. Yeah.

[C]

I'm not like, you know your lines.

[A]

You know your lines are ready.

[C]

Yeah. And even if I don't, I'm fine.

[A]

Wow. I'm getting to that point now, too.

[C]

Even if I don't know the lines, I'll just.

[A]

Yeah, I'll get through it. The kind of projects I do, it doesn't even Matter. You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He.

[B]

You.

[A]

You.

[B]

You saying you're not even reading the script.

[A]

No, what I'll do now is I'll be in makeup and read it for the first time. Oh, my God. Yeah.

[B]

I mean.

[A]

And I'll go, oh, no, I don't think I can do this, Bobby.

[C]

I've done that.

[B]

That.

[A]

What do you mean, what you've done?

[C]

Yeah, I've done that same thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Because we're similar in the way of our add is so strong.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That it's. You can only deal with the thing you're doing that day.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

I can't deal with it. Three days.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Five days out.

[A]

Exactly.

[C]

It's. I. I crammed. I. I would get A's on tests, but I'd never do my homework.

[A]

Yeah. So I. I strongly would watch a podcast and even. I'll blow you for a guest spot. That. The funny thing that you said, you know, is a really good title. I think it'd be fun to watch you talk to other actors about how it's changed and complain. Well, because I love complaining.

[C]

You know what it is, is, is the perception of, like, what you said. Like, my perception of what somebody else is doing is always. They're doing so great. They're doing so great. And you hear, like, how much is their podcast making? What the. The. Why am I not doing that? Oh, because I. I don't have the confidence of that. I. That people would watch. Right. Or listen.

[A]

They're not in the beginning.

[C]

Right. And you just have to do it for a couple years and build your audience.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

They're not gonna work. It's not a lot of work. It's once a week.

[C]

Right.

[A]

For one hour.

[C]

Yeah. You only do this once a week?

[A]

Yeah, sometimes twice a week. But this. This week, how many are we doing?

[D]

Just this one.

[A]

One. Just this one this week.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

I'm doing one tonight with my other one, and then the week's pretty much I go to New York to promote something else. But Saturday. But my week's open. So my point is, is it's an easy job. It's fun to do, and then once you build an audience, it's, you know, it's. It's pretty much good. I don't know if I'm going to grow any higher than I've already grown.

[C]

Right.

[A]

I think I'm pretty much at the level maybe.

[C]

Do you find podcasts dipping in general? Yeah, because.

[A]

So here's. Here's. Here's my complaint.

[C]

You want to hear My complaint.

[A]

All right. It's the reason why I. We, Andrew and I, and we all did in the first place, is because Hollywood was like, no more.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Right. So then I was like, what do I do? So I did this. 10. How many. How many years has Tiger Billy been around?

[E]

Almost 11.

[A]

11 years. We've been doing this 11 years.

[C]

Right.

[A]

And then all of a sudden, you see Hollywood stars doing it. You know, I mean, guys that don't need to. What do you need?

[C]

You're already in.

[A]

You did it already. Yeah.

[C]

Stay in your lane.

[A]

You did it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, you're in Top series and killing it, and then you're doing this side Hustle.

[E]

For a while, it felt like we were podcasters were just like, the outcasts or the underdogs. It, like, felt. That was the vibe in the beginning, which is why.

[C]

But that was the vibe of someone watching them and listening to them. I used to listen to a ton of podcasts.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I. There's a bunch of people that are friends of yours. I used to listen to their podcast, and I don't anymore.

[A]

Why?

[C]

Because I'm sick of listening to them talk about watches and. And how. Complaining about how rich they are.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

It's like, Jesus Christ. Guys, do you remember who. Why we started listening to you?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You went way far away from that.

[A]

Yeah, I'm very frugal. Okay.

[C]

Cheap.

[A]

I'm cheap. I mean, I. I spend my money with my girlfriend. Like, we'll go. You want to go to a nice restaurant tonight?

[C]

Great.

[A]

That I can afford.

[E]

Yeah. He's extremely generous.

[A]

Yeah, that. But it's like, I don't. Like. I know some. Like, the watches, you know, I mean, I know that a couple of these podcasts will compare. Like, where'd you get that?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, this is a 400, 000, you know, I mean, I'm like, what are you doing?

[E]

Is that an investment, though, at that point?

[A]

I know. Yeah. They think it's an investment piece. They think it's an art piece.

[C]

Yeah, that art piece.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Are we the metadici. Like, that's insane.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Or like, look, dick jokes on stage. Put money away and get some interest.

[A]

Yeah, I got a titanium, you know, I mean, putter for, you know, from. From Cockatooshi.

[C]

But all that is a flex, right?

[A]

It's a flex.

[C]

I understand the flex. I get it.

[A]

I don't get it.

[C]

This is fake gold, right?

[A]

Yeah, I like it. I like fake gold.

[C]

Yeah. But, like, I don't. It loses me as an audience.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah, I get it.

[C]

When I'm driving in my car and I'm worried about paying for something, I have a cousin or cousin in law who is Filipino who lives in Winnipeg. Winnipeg. And they fucking love Bobby, right?

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

A bunch of weird Filipinos.

[E]

Filipinos, Number one, Bobby Lee.

[C]

Love Bobby Lee. Right. They like you starting a podcast because you're the weird guy from Mad TV that worked.

[A]

What's the weird guy?

[C]

You were the weird guy. You were the straight man.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

The guy that we put in a green screen suit to look like he's jacking off dragons. That's Bobby Lee, the straight man. Yeah,

[A]

you're right. I did do that. Yeah. Well, you know, I feel like, you know, I love my fans, and when I see the audience, I. It reminds me of who I am.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. And they're all like me.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, I mean, they're just like, you know, particular, you know, and I. And. And I worship. I love that I'm the Pied Piper of them, you know? And it's like, you know, you have an audience out there too.

[C]

I do.

[A]

And so I think that.

[C]

And I will say I get very frustrated with myself that I don't.

[A]

You're gonna. You're gonna. You're gonna do it. I'm gonna force you to do it.

[C]

Because I. I like, there are guys out there that you. And I know this bothers you where you're like, really? That guy's a bigger name than. Than. Than me?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You're like, I. Everywhere you go in the world, someone's gonna know who you are.

[A]

Who, me?

[C]

Yes. When you walk down the street, someone's gonna recognize.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

It just happens. I get recognized every single day.

[A]

I know you do.

[C]

It just is how I am. And guys that. That never happens to are considered a bigger name than me.

[A]

I know.

[C]

And I don't.

[A]

It's so frustrating.

[C]

Know how to make that money?

[A]

Yeah. Well, we're gonna teach you. Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're gonna teach you how to do it.

[C]

So you're producing my pocket podcast.

[A]

I'm thinking about it.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm literally thinking about it. I want to give it a go.

[C]

I'll give you all the money you want.

[A]

No, no, we'll do a fair deal. But anyway, I just. I want to do a down note. You know what I mean? Are you plugging anything, by the way?

[C]

No.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

That was a. Down there.

[A]

Yeah. What?

[B]

Check out his Instagram.

[A]

Yeah. Follow his Instagram.

[B]

You're about. Have 100k.

[C]

Yeah, it keeps the bots keep going in and out of 100k, you know?

[E]

Yeah, yeah, he did that one big cleanup.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So get into. Get into Matt here and then I just download Rest in Peace, Oliver Tree. Yesterday was the roughest. I'm sorry, what? No, it was the roughest day yesterday. I was about to do a bunch of shit. I canceled everything. And I don't know, I'm still processing it. But I love you and I miss you and what a talent and what an oddball. And I think that's the thing that I relate to most about him is him and I were the same kind of people, you know? But anyway, it's a comedy podcast and it was a rough day yesterday, and Rest in peace, brother.

[E]

Give Matt Jones a round of applause.

[D]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.