Podcast Summary: "Acontece que no es poco | Alfonso XII: el entierro del último rey que murió reinando"

Podcast: Todo Concostrina (SER Podcast)
Host: Nieves Concostrina
Episode Date: November 30, 2022

Episode Overview

This episode explores the life, death, and elaborate funeral of Alfonso XII, highlighting his significance as the last Spanish king to die while still reigning. Host Nieves Concostrina offers her trademark witty and irreverent take on royal history, focusing on the strange rituals and enduring Bourbon traditions that surrounded Alfonso’s final days and burial. The episode balances sharp critique, humorous anecdotes, and historical rigor to shed light on both the king and the monarchy’s lingering oddities.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Alfonso XII: Life Cut Short, Bourbon Classics

• A Life Packed Into 27 Years: Concostrina draws a parallel between the young deaths of legendary musicians (Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin, etc.) and Alfonso XII, who also died at 27.
• Bourbon Traits: Despite his youth, Alfonso XII fit the Bourbon mold, especially regarding infidelity.
  • “Como bien advirtió la Victoria Eugenia... 'los Borbones llevan la infidelidad en la sangre.'” (01:22)
• Eventful November: His birth (Nov 28), marriage (Nov 29, to María Cristina de Austria), and funeral (Nov 30) all clustered at month’s end.

2. Death and Disease

• Tuberculosis’s Toll: Alfonso XII succumbed to tuberculosis at age 27, a disease that "no entiende de clases ni de nada." (03:47)
• Personal and Political Contradictions:
  • He had three “official” children, some clandestine ones, and expedited notable decrees—including barring women from university after the first Spanish women earned medical degrees.
    • “Mucho tardó en morirse.” – Concostrina’s sharp retort to his reactionary decree. (04:53)

3. The Oddities of a Royal Burial

• The Pudridero Ritual: Instead of direct burial, royal bodies were first left in a "pudridero" (decay chamber) at El Escorial monastery.
  • “No los entierran... se entregan los cuerpos a unos señores con faldas... que se encargan de la custodia. Los llevan ahí a que se pudran.” (02:52)
• Embalming & Ceremony: After a basic embalming, aristocrats dressed the king for state viewing. Eventually, he was transported by train for the El Escorial rites.

4. Absurd Funeral Protocols

• Ceremonial Verification: Old protocols dictated that the Minister of Justice ask the royal guards to confirm, under oath, that the king’s body was indeed his.
  • “Monteros de Espinosa, ¿Juráis que el cuerpo que contiene la presente caja es el de su Majestad el Rey Don Alfonso XII de Borbón...?” (08:19)
• Three Calls to the Dead King: In the crypt, officials repeatedly called out “Señor, señor, señor” to the king before officially declaring him deceased.
  • “Evidentemente, el rey no respondió...” (09:38)
  • After silence, the chief of the royal guards remarked: “Verdaderamente está muerto.” (10:19)

5. French Bourbon Inheritance and More Absurdities

• Imported Customs: The tradition of calling out to dead kings stems from the Bourbon’s adoption of French court rituals since Felipe V.
  • “Esto se lo traen los borbones, porque ellos ya desde que vino Felipe V se seguían las maneras francesas...” (11:51)
• Other Royal Deaths: A similar process was used for Carlos III, complete with face-checks and mirror breath-tests to confirm death.
  • “El ministro acercó su propia cara hasta casi rozar la nariz... y repitió las tres voces... acercó un espejito a su boca...” (12:51)

6. Notable Observations & Cultural Critique

• Concostrina consistently mocks the anachronism and theatricality of these royal protocols, contrasting their strictness with their evident uselessness.
  • “Llamar a un rey muerto... les quitamos los protocolos y se quedan en nada.” (09:49)
  • “Después de tanta chorradica...” (10:51)
• The phrase “El rey ha muerto, viva el rey” is discussed as a non-Spanish custom, noting that at Alfonso XII’s death, there technically was no next king—Alfonso XIII was not yet born.

Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• On Royal Infidelity:
  “Los Borbones llevan la infidelidad en la sangre.” – Victoria Eugenia to Queen Sofía. (01:20)
• On Barring Women from University:
  “Mucho tardó en morirse Alfonso XII.” (04:53)
• Royal Funeral Verification:
  “Monteros de Espinosa, ¿Juráis que el cuerpo que contiene la presente caja es el de su Majestad?” (08:18)
• On Proving Death:
  “Evidentemente, el rey no respondió.” (09:38)
  “Verdaderamente está muerto.” (10:19)
• Nieves’ Scathing Wit:
  “Después de tanta chorradica... cabría esperar que alguien hubiera gritado aquello de ‘el rey ha muerto, viva el rey’. Pero es que no, porque aquí no es costumbre.” (10:51)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:33: Intro to Alfonso XII and comparison to famed musicians
• 01:11: Details of Alfonso XII’s eventful final days
• 03:41: Alfonso’s cause of death (tuberculosis) and look at his private/public life
• 04:53: Discussion about women’s exclusion from university
• 05:35: Beginning of funeral protocols for Alfonso XII
• 08:00: Absurdities in royal protocol explained
• 09:38: “Señor, señor, señor” – the ceremonial calling of the dead king
• 11:51: Origin of protocols; tracing them to the French Bourbon dynasty
• 12:51: Funeral process of Carlos III as precedent

Conclusion

Nieves Concostrina wraps up by noting that Spain’s last king to die reigning left behind not just a corpse, but an elaborate set of rituals that persist in the monarchy's shadow—sometimes absurd, always revealing. The episode is a sharp, accessible, and irreverent look at the intersections of power, tradition, and the inevitably human reality of royal death.