Totally Booked with Zibby: Episode Featuring Ada Calhoun on CRUSH: A Novel

Introduction

In this engaging episode of Totally Booked with Zibby, host Zibby Owens sits down with acclaimed author Ada Calhoun to delve into her debut novel, CRUSH. The conversation explores the intricacies of love, relationships, and personal growth, offering listeners a deep dive into the themes that resonate with Generation X women and beyond.

Guest Introduction

Ada Calhoun, the author of CRUSH: A Novel, joins Zibby Owens to discuss her latest work. Ada is renowned for her insightful non-fiction, including Why We Can’t Sleep, which explores the lives of Generation X women. Her novel, CRUSH, marks her foray into fiction, showcasing her versatility as a writer.

Overview of CRUSH: A Novel

Ada begins by outlining the premise of CRUSH:

"It's about a woman who's happily married and then she meets this other man, and they develop this super strong connection, and she tries to figure out a way, mostly through reading a lot of books, to keep both men amazing." [03:53]

The novel intricately weaves themes of love, devotion, and the complexities of maintaining multiple relationships, all while navigating personal desires and societal norms.

Exploring Themes of Love and Loss

Ada shares a poignant passage from her novel, illustrating the emotional turmoil of her protagonist:

"They say crying clears out the residue of what was there before. When you're disoriented, crying is a proper response. But what about when you can't stop?... I kept switching roles the way I had at times in a moment of orgasm, sexual situations flashing through my brain. Only this version was depressing." [04:09]

Zibby praises Ada's fresh take on a timeless subject:

"People have been writing about love forever. You think like, how can people write about love in a new way? And yet you can't and you did." [05:10]

The Unpredictability of Love

Ada reflects on the universal yet unpredictable nature of love:

"Everybody has been trying to figure this out for a very long time. And it is so unruly and it is so surprising to every one of us individually and to every culture." [05:14]

She emphasizes that despite widespread experiences, love remains intensely personal and often defies logical understanding.

Open Marriage and Relationship Dynamics

The conversation shifts to the concept of open marriages, a central theme in CRUSH. Ada explains:

"The boundaries are very hard. It’s very difficult because love is so unruly. And in her case, it just runs roughshod over every attempt that she makes to keep it under control." [08:18]

Ada clarifies that the novel neither champions nor condemns polyamory but instead portrays one woman's quest to balance her desires with her existing commitments.

Passion in Midlife

Ada discusses the portrayal of midlife passion in her novel:

"Women in midlife often are working a lot more than 9 to 5 and also might have little kids or no families or just any kind of permutation of a very full and complicated life. So finding passion can be maybe more jarring in that state where suddenly you have these feelings or cravings that can be confusing." [09:28]

She highlights the evolving roles and challenges faced by women in midlife, making the pursuit of passion both a personal and societal exploration.

Literary Influences and Writing Process

Ada shares her journey as a writer, revealing her initial struggles and eventual transition to fiction:

"When I tried to do a memoir about the last few years of my life and it just was not working. And so this was this way to actually talk about these ideas I had and not have to stick to the fact." [07:36]

She contrasts the constraints of memoir writing with the creative freedom of fiction, finding solace and expression in crafting her own narratives.

Balancing Fiction and Nonfiction

Discussing her diverse body of work, Ada touches upon her previous projects and future aspirations:

"They’ve all been different. And so I'm always working on at least one or two things. And I think the next one might be a novel, but I'm still trying to figure it out." [21:17]

Her ability to navigate between genres underscores her versatility and commitment to exploring various facets of human experience.

Advice for Aspiring Authors

Ada offers valuable advice for writers striving to find their voice and community:

"Finding a community like that for whatever kind of writing you're doing... It makes such a difference just to be around other people who know what you're doing or trying to do." [24:58]

She advocates for creating supportive networks, emphasizing the importance of collaboration and mutual encouragement in the writing journey.

Closing Remarks

As the conversation wraps up, Ada expresses her gratitude and excitement for her ongoing projects and upcoming events:

"There’s a couple in New York and then I'm going all over. I’m going to like books and books in Miami... It'll be really fun." [18:06]

Zibby thanks Ada for her insightful contributions and encourages listeners to explore CRUSH and Ada’s other works to gain a deeper understanding of the nuanced themes she presents.

Final Thoughts

This episode of Totally Booked with Zibby offers a captivating exploration of Ada Calhoun’s CRUSH, delving into themes of love, personal growth, and the challenges of modern relationships. Ada's candid discussions provide listeners with a profound understanding of her creative process and the compelling narratives she crafts, making it a must-listen for book enthusiasts and aspiring writers alike.

Notable Quotes and Timestamps

• Ada Calhoun on Love and Writing:

  "Everybody has been trying to figure this out for a very long time. And it is so unruly and it is so surprising to every one of us individually and to every culture." [05:14]

• Ada Calhoun on Open Marriages:

  "The boundaries are very hard. It’s very difficult because love is so unruly." [08:18]

• Ada Calhoun’s Writing Process:

  "Doing fiction, you can just make everybody do what you want. It's just magical." [18:58]

• Advice for Writers:

  "Finding a community... It makes such a difference just to be around other people who know what you're doing or trying to do." [24:58]

Conclusion

Zibby Owens' conversation with Ada Calhoun provides a rich and engaging exploration of CRUSH, offering listeners profound insights into the complexities of love and personal fulfillment. Through thoughtful discussion and meaningful quotes, the episode encapsulates the essence of Ada's work and her contributions to contemporary literature.