Podcast Summary: "PERFECT IS BORING (AND IT TASTES LIKE KALE): Finding Belonging and Purpose Without Changing Who You Are" with Jess Johnston

Overview

In this engaging episode of Totally Booked with Zibby, host Zibby Owens invites Jess Johnston, author of Perfect Is Boring and It Tastes Like Kale: Finding Belonging and Purpose Without Changing Who You Are, to delve into the intricacies of perfectionism, authentic connections, and the journey toward self-acceptance. Released on August 13, 2025, this episode offers listeners profound insights into overcoming the pressures of perfection and embracing the messy, beautiful realities of everyday life.

1. Introduction to Jess Johnston and Her Work [03:15]

Zibby Owens introduces Jess Johnston, highlighting her multifaceted roles as a mother, author, and creative spirit. Jess is celebrated for her relatable writing style that makes readers feel at ease, as if they're sharing a cozy conversation over coffee. Her notable works include the Wall Street Journal bestseller I'll Be There But I'll Be Wearing Sweatpants and contributions to prominent publications like HuffPost, Scary Mommy, and Motherly.

Notable Quote:

Jess Johnston [03:15]: "My writing makes you feel like you're sitting cross-legged on my couch in your cozy pants while sharing hearts and drinking coffee."

2. Exploring the Themes of Perfectionism and Connection [04:17 – 05:16]

Jess shares that her book is a deeply personal exploration of her own struggles with perfectionism. She emphasizes the universal nature of these challenges, particularly among women striving to meet invisible societal standards. By embracing imperfection, Jess believes individuals can foster genuine connections and find solace in shared vulnerabilities.

Notable Quote:

Jess Johnston [04:20]: "There's so much connection to be found when we're real and vulnerable about the hard stuff, the messy stuff, the imperfect stuff is really, really powerful."

3. Embracing Imperfection in Daily Life [06:06 – 09:01]

The conversation shifts to the practical aspects of dealing with imperfection. Jess humorously recounts everyday struggles, such as managing mismatched socks for her children, highlighting that life's unpredictability often leads to moments of chaos. She advocates for recognizing and accepting these imperfections rather than striving for unattainable standards.

Notable Quotes:

Zibby Owens [06:07]: "So funny. I love that line."
Jess Johnston [08:16]: "I'm the placing in my life where I want to let that go. I'm probably not going to know where all the socks are, maybe ever. But that's okay."

4. The Power of Authentic Friendships [09:41 – 10:25]

Jess discusses the transformative impact of having supportive friendships. She shares a poignant moment when a close friend reassured her during a particularly overwhelming period, saying, "I like you when you're a mess." This affirmation underscored the importance of unconditional support and acceptance in fostering mental and emotional well-being.

Notable Quote:

Jess Johnston [09:46]: "I like you when you're fun and not fun. I like you when you're a mess, when you're not a mess. And that's just like the most freeing thing."

5. Navigating Parenting and Connecting with Teenagers [17:51 – 19:09]

Transitioning to motherhood, Jess candidly shares the challenges of connecting with her teenage children. She expresses feelings of inadequacy and the constant effort to balance relationships with multiple kids, each at different developmental stages. This segment underscores the universal struggle parents face in maintaining meaningful connections amidst busy lives.

Notable Quote:

Jess Johnston [17:56]: "I have teenagers, so I feel like all the time I'm like maybe I have four kids. I feel like all the time I'm like winning and connecting with maybe one or two of them and then I need to work on my relationship with the other two."

6. The Experience of Moving and Building Community [20:17 – 22:23]

Jess recounts her experience of relocating to Santa Barbara with close friends, highlighting the challenges and joys of moving. She emphasizes the importance of a supportive community in easing the transition, providing both practical help and emotional support during stressful times. This move not only provided a fresh start but also reinforced the value of strong, authentic friendships.

Notable Quote:

Jess Johnston [21:30]: "Moving can always be difficult, but it was very incredible. Moving to a completely new place but having friends with so much history that as you're struggling to find your way, you can be like, what do you have in your fridge? I just vent and talk about how it's going."

7. Growing Your Platform Authentically [22:23 – 23:21]

When asked about expanding her platform, Jess attributes her success to authenticity. By sharing her genuine experiences and vulnerabilities, she resonates with her audience. Jess emphasizes the importance of staying true to oneself and addressing relatable topics, which naturally attracts and builds a loyal following.

Notable Quote:

Jess Johnston [22:37]: "What worked was really telling my truth... speaking your own, something that really resonates with you, there's a big chance that it will resonate with others as well."

8. Looking Forward and Embracing the Creative Process [23:45 – 24:23]

Jess touches on her creative process and future projects, expressing a willingness to let ideas develop organically. With her children growing older and new life changes on the horizon, she reflects on the evolving landscape of her personal and professional life, hinting at forthcoming emotional and creative explorations.

Notable Quote:

Jess Johnston [23:48]: "I have just found that there are words inside of me, but I just don't know where they're going to land."

Conclusion

Throughout this heartfelt episode, Jess Johnston masterfully intertwines personal anecdotes with universal themes of imperfection, connection, and self-acceptance. Listeners are encouraged to embrace their authentic selves, seek and cherish genuine relationships, and find strength in vulnerability. Jess's candid discussions offer a comforting reminder that imperfection is not only acceptable but also a pathway to deeper connections and personal growth.

For those seeking inspiration and reassurance in their own journeys toward self-acceptance and meaningful relationships, this episode serves as a valuable companion.

Additional Information

• Follow Jess Johnston: Stay updated with Jess’s work and insights through her social media and publications.
• Purchase the Book: Perfect Is Boring and It Tastes Like Kale is available for purchase through various book retailers.
• Connect with Zibby Owens: Follow Zibby on Instagram @zibbyowens and visit zibbymedia.com for more information and resources.