Totally Booked with Zibby: Episode Summary Featuring Kiana Harris – "Mainline Mama: A Memoir"
Introduction
In this compelling episode of Totally Booked with Zibby, host Zibby Owens welcomes Kiana Harris, the author of Mainline Mama: A Memoir. Kiana, a multifaceted individual—a writer, storyteller, mother of five, prison abolitionist, activist, and academic—shares her profound journey navigating motherhood amidst the challenges of the carceral system. With an impressive array of accolades, including the 2018-19 PEN America Writing for Justice Fellowship and the 2024 Haymarket Writing Freedom Fellowship, Kiana brings a wealth of experience and insight to the conversation.
Exploring Mainline Mama
Kiana begins by explaining the essence of her memoir:
Kiana Harris [04:21]: "Mainline Mama for me is a love letter to women, specifically Black girls and women who've been forced into relationships with the carceral system, whether that's being incarcerated, formerly incarcerated, or women like me who are mainline mamas that are just trying to, you know, keep a connection to a loved one."
She defines a "mainline mama" as a woman striving to maintain bonds with loved ones entangled in the prison system while juggling roles as caregivers for their children and communities. This memoir serves as her coming-of-age story, detailing her experiences raising children with incarcerated parents and the personal growth that emerged from these trials.
Personal Journey and Resilience
Zibby delves into Kiana's early life, highlighting the profound impact of becoming a mother at 14:
Kiana Harris [06:07]: "It was a whirlwind because my whole life just exploded. The double life of Kiana was exposed in an instant."
Kiana candidly discusses the abrupt transition from envisioning a future as an obstetrician to facing the immediate responsibilities of motherhood. Despite the crushing circumstances, she reflects on her ability to defer her dreams rather than seeing them crushed:
Kiana Harris [07:00]: "What I like to think about it now, the dreams were never crushed. They were just deferred. Right. Because I ended up doing everything that I wanted to do in life, but it was just a very difficult time to navigate and find my new place for myself and within my family."
Her resilience shines through as she recounts finding a supportive community at a specialized school for pregnant girls, which allowed her to graduate a year early and lay the foundation for her future accomplishments.
Navigating Teenage Motherhood
Zibby empathizes with the unique challenges of being a teenager with a child, and Kiana shares her strategies for overcoming depression and forging her path:
Kiana Harris [07:38]: "I am resilient. And I know it sounds so cliché. No, no, I am relentless as far as if I'm determined to do something, I'm gonna do it."
Kiana emphasizes the importance of self-love and community support, which were pivotal in her ability to overcome adversity. Her story serves as a beacon of hope for young mothers facing similar struggles.
Impact on Her Children
Kiana discusses the profound effect her memoir has had on her children, fostering deeper understanding and connection:
Kiana Harris [09:02]: "It's so funny because I... my children, especially my older children, can really know who I am as a person."
Her children, particularly her 15-year-old, find solace and relatability in her narrative, bridging generational gaps and fostering meaningful conversations about personal growth and resilience.
Confronting Trauma
A particularly poignant moment in the conversation addresses Kiana's experience of sexual assault and its aftermath:
Kiana Harris [13:56]: "I was hurt on a number of levels because it's someone who I previously trusted and I thought I would never imagine that they would do this kind of thing to me."
Kiana bravely shares the emotional turmoil following the assault, including her unexpected and heartbreaking reaction from her then-husband Jason. This revelation marks a turning point in her journey toward self-discovery and healing through therapy.
Activism and Current Work
Transitioning from her personal narrative, Kiana sheds light on her current activism and academic pursuits:
Kiana Harris [16:50]: "I'm currently at the University of Washington, which I love, and we are currently, you know, looking, leaning into anti-racist justice work as far as the connection between mass incarceration and health."
Her research focuses on the dire health outcomes faced by formerly incarcerated individuals, addressing issues like high blood pressure, diabetes, and the broader impacts of stress and inadequate healthcare within the prison system. Kiana's work aims to uncover solutions that can improve health outcomes both during and after incarceration.
Parenting Insights
Kiana offers invaluable parenting advice rooted in her personal experiences:
Kiana Harris [19:35]: "I think it's very important to check in with your kids. [...] Really check in on them. Like, check in and see how their heart is doing."
She advocates for deep, meaningful communication with children, emphasizing emotional well-being over superficial inquiries about daily activities. Additionally, Kiana highlights the importance of involving children in major family decisions to foster transparency and mutual understanding.
Future Endeavors and Legacy
Looking ahead, Kiana reveals her plans for her second book, which promises to delve deeper into the interconnectedness of health and family relationships:
Kiana Harris [20:49]: "I'm working on the second book, which I'm very excited about. It's looking like it's going to be a matrilineal memoir of relationships, tracing connections between health and family."
She aspires to explore the legacies of silence and trauma passed down through generations, aiming to inspire and shed light on how these unspoken burdens manifest in physical ailments and affect familial bonds.
Conclusion
Zibby and Kiana conclude the episode by reflecting on the transformative power of Kiana's story and her unwavering resilience. Kiana's journey from a teenage mother navigating incarceration's harsh realities to a respected activist and scholar serves as an inspiring testament to the strength of self-love and community support.
Notable Quotes
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Kiana Harris [04:21]: "Mainline Mama for me is a love letter to women, specifically Black girls and women who've been forced into relationships with the carceral system..."
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Kiana Harris [07:00]: "What I like to think about it now, the dreams were never crushed. They were just deferred."
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Kiana Harris [13:56]: "I was hurt on a number of levels because it's someone who I previously trusted and I thought I would never imagine that they would do this kind of thing to me."
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Kiana Harris [19:35]: "I think it's very important to check in with your kids. [...] Really check in on them. Like, check in and see how their heart is doing."
Final Thoughts
This episode of Totally Booked with Zibby offers a deep and heartfelt exploration of Kiana Harris's life and work. Through her memoir, activism, and academic endeavors, Kiana illuminates the intricate ties between personal trauma, systemic injustice, and the pursuit of healing and self-love. Listeners are left inspired by her resilience and commitment to fostering change both within her family and the broader community.
