Lihi Lapid, A WOMAN OF VALOR and ON HER OWN: A Novel

Summary

Podcast Episode Summary: "Lihi Lapid, A Woman of Valor and On Her Own: A Novel"

Podcast Information:

• Title: Totally Booked with Zibby
• Host: Zibby Owens
• Episode Title: Lihi Lapid, A WOMAN OF VALOR and ON HER OWN: A Novel
• Release Date: April 21, 2025

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Introduction

In this poignant episode of Totally Booked with Zibby, host Zibby Owens welcomes Lihi Lapid, a bestselling Israeli author, photojournalist, columnist, and activist. Lihi, wife of former Israeli Prime Minister Yair Lapid, shares her heartfelt journey through motherhood, writing, and activism, focusing primarily on her impactful works, Woman of Valor and her latest novel, On Her Own.

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Discussion of Woman of Valor

Zibby opens the conversation by expressing her deep connection to Lihi's first book, Woman of Valor, describing it as "the best book I think I've ever read about marriage and resentment and parenting with children" ([04:24] Zibby Owens). This sets the stage for an in-depth exploration of the book's themes and personal significance.

Lihi recounts the origins of Woman of Valor, emphasizing the book’s personal nature and its unexpected success in Israel. She explains how the book became a catalyst for societal change by being the first time a prominent figure in Israel openly discussed parenting a child with special needs:

"It was the first time someone very famous talked about being a parent for kids with special needs. So it was a really, very, very different." ([04:41] Lihi Lapid)

She delves into the emotional struggles of motherhood, particularly when dealing with her daughter Yael's severe autism. Lihi shares the profound impact of societal expectations and personal sacrifices:

"We are growing up and they tell us all the time we can do whatever we want to do, we can be whatever we want to be. And I'm not so sure it's always the truth." ([05:32] Lihi Lapid)

A particularly moving moment occurs when Lihi discusses the publication of a deeply personal paragraph in her book, despite initial fears of exposing too much:

"I prayed that I will have a deaf child because other possibilities were so much more frightening... Yael taught us a huge lesson about love and about family." ([10:45] Lihi Lapid)

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Emotional Resonance and Familial Bonds

Zibby reflects on a heart-wrenching scene from the book where Lihi confronts her father's lack of acknowledgment for her as a mother:

"Why me? Why did this happen to me? Why did this happen to my daughter?" ([13:33] Zibby Owens)

Lihi responds by highlighting the delicate balance between self-sacrifice and self-preservation in parenting:

"The line between giving all of ourselves to our family and keeping some of ourselves to ourselves is a line that we need to balance all the time." ([15:41] Lihi Lapid)

She further discusses the strain that raising a child with disabilities can place on marital relationships and the importance of maintaining a healthy partnership for the well-being of the entire family.

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Transition to On Her Own: A Novel

Shifting focus to her latest work, On Her Own: A Novel, Lihi shares the inspiration behind the story, which intertwines personal experiences with broader societal issues. She describes the novel's central characters, Nina and Carmela, and their journey of connection and healing:

"If you don't write them, they will stay in the stairwell in Tel Aviv." ([28:36] Lihi Lapid)

Lihi elaborates on the novel's exploration of family dynamics, the challenges of maintaining connections across distances, and the emotional toll of military service in Israel.

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Cultural Context and Impact

Lihi provides cultural insights into the Israeli experience, particularly the profound emotional impact of military service on families:

"For Israelis, a soldier is not a war machine... it's our son that got to the age of 18 and needs to go and defend his country." ([35:16] Lihi Lapid)

She discusses the thematic elements of her novel that reflect the collective grief and resilience of Israeli families, especially in the context of recent conflicts.

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Personal Reflections and Future Endeavors

As the conversation draws to a close, Zibby praises Lihi's vulnerability and ability to give voice to deeply personal and universal experiences:

"Your thoughts on the subject are so profound and so relatable... Something that's deep down and resonates." ([35:52] Zibby Owens)

Lihi expresses gratitude for the platform to share her stories and emphasizes the strengthening bonds within the Jewish community during challenging times:

"The bond between Jews in Israel and Jews in America and around the world became so much stronger." ([37:55] Lihi Lapid)

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Conclusion

This episode offers a deeply emotional and insightful look into Lihi Lapid's life and work. Through her candid discussions, listeners gain a profound understanding of the complexities of motherhood, the power of storytelling, and the resilience required to navigate personal and societal challenges. Zibby Owens skillfully guides the conversation, allowing Lihi's powerful narratives to shine and resonate with a broad audience.

Notable Quotes:

• Zibby Owens ([04:24]): "I started by reading Woman of Valor and it made me cry. Loved it so much."
• Lihi Lapid ([04:41]): "It was the first time someone very famous talked about being a parent for kids with special needs."
• Lihi Lapid ([10:45]): "Yael taught us a huge lesson about love and about family."
• Zibby Owens ([13:33]): "You tried so hard... sometimes all the trying gets in the way of the bigger picture."
• Lihi Lapid ([15:41]): "The line between giving all of ourselves to our family and keeping some of ourselves to ourselves is a line that we need to balance all the time."
• Lihi Lapid ([35:16]): "For Israelis, a soldier is not a war machine... it's our son that got to the age of 18 and needs to go and defend his country."

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Final Thoughts

Listeners are encouraged to delve into Lihi Lapid's works to experience the depth and emotional gravity she brings to themes of family, sacrifice, and resilience. This episode not only highlights Lihi's literary contributions but also underscores the universal struggles and triumphs that resonate across cultures and personal experiences.

Transcript

[Zibby Owens]

Are you interested in being part of the live studio audience while I film a series for Totally Booked with Zibby Live in New York City? Sign [e-mail] I have a little Google form that you can fill out and if you get selected you can come sit in the audience, hear from authors before their books have even come out, and be a part of the show again. Go to zibbyowens.com Filmings will be on April 16th, 23rd, 30th and May 7th in New York City. Be a part of it.

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[Zibby Owens]

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[Lihi Lapid]

Thank you.

[Zibby Owens]

Thank you for coming on Lihi. When we did our event together at Temple Emmanuel, you talked about your first book, Woman of Valor, and how that had been a personal book and one that had really taken off and then you had written your novel. And so I started by reading Woman of Valor and it made me cry. Loved it so much. I feel like I need to sit and reread it again just to soak up all of your knowledge. And it's like the best book I think I've ever read about marriage and resentment and parenting with children and oh my gosh, it was so good.

[Lihi Lapid]

Wow. Okay. It's. It's. Yeah. Wow. It's. It's not the book we are. We're scheduled to talk about.

[Zibby Owens]

I know. I'm sorry. I got to. I couldn't stop reading it. I just couldn't. I was going to read a page or two just to be familiar with it and then I ended up reading the whole thing and I couldn't stop.

[Lihi Lapid]

Actually. It was a very huge bestseller in Israel and I think I wasn't ready for that. So I didn't really try to help it go on outside of Israel. But I do think that it's got a lot of place, really. It was a, it was a book that changed something in Israeli society because it was the first time someone very famous talked about being a parent for kids with special needs. So. So it was a really very, very different. So thank you for reminding it and loving it.

[Zibby Owens]

No, it was so good. Do you mind telling listeners a little bit? I can summarize it too. But how you ended up writing that book, what do you mean by you were famous? Like, just give a little background.

[Lihi Lapid]

Okay. I'll Give a little background. So, hi, I'm Lili Lapid. And I never thought I would write. Actually, I never thought I would write. I just. I was a news photographer, a tough news photographer with motorbike and short ha. But I married someone that he's a writer and he wrote in the newspaper. Then he became a politician, but before that. And his father was writing books and writing for the newspaper. And his mother is a very famous author. So as a young woman, I said, I rather know what they are talking about instead of feeling a little bit stupid at dinners. So I went and studied a little bit of literature. And few years passed and I became a mother. And then I realized that no newspaper wants a news photographer that breastfeed every four hours. And on the motorbike there is no place for baby chair. And I found myself unemployed, but it's not unemployed, as I was left without the thing that I thought all my life I would do, which is photography. It was the thing that I studied, that I did, that I expressed myself through. And then I started writing a book about this change, becoming a mother, becoming a family. And I wrote a book that was never translated or anything, but it started this talk about, you know, we are growing up and they tell us all the time we can do whatever we want to do, we can be whatever we want to be. And I'm not so sure it's always the truth. We can try and do a lot of things, but I do think that there's a moment in the life of women when they become mothers, that something changes. And it can be a change of what we want to be, or like what happened to me that I couldn't be anymore and use photographer. But I also fell in love with those little babies. It was Liora, and after a year and one month, his sister Yael. And this change is a change that I wasn't prepared for, because I grew up thinking, being a woman, being a man, what's the difference really? And then I realized that there is a difference. And then the book was published. And then I was offered to write a column in the newspaper, which I wrote for 15 years, about family, but about family from the side of a working mother, of someone that doesn't give up on herself and she wants, like our generation, the generation that we can slow down sometimes, but then we continue to pursue our dreams and our thoughts, and we want to be involved and we are not like, giving up on things about life. So. And then I will say something about Women of Valor, which is a book that I I wrote it and actually after I finished writing it, I tried to censor myself in a lot of things. And I will say something because maybe a lot of people that hear your podcast are writers or want to write. And I went to my. My mother in law that she's a very famous writer, Shulamit la. And I told her, listen, I wrote a book and it's too personal and I don't know, do you write the whole truth when you write a book? And she looked at me, this tough woman, and gave me the best advice ever about writing. She said, when you write a book, you write the whole truth and then you erase a little bit. And I try to erase things that won't embarrass anyone. And I got to one point that I couldn't erase it, one paragraph. And I decided that the book won't be published because it was too exposing to have it published and to publish it without this paragraph. I felt that it's not the truth anymore. I can quote the paragraph at the end. After a year and a half, I sat with my husband with the ear and I told him, listen, I have to publish this book. And he said, you know what it means to the exposure? Are you sure you are ready for that? And I said yes. And we gathered the family and decided that the book is being published. And the paragraph goes like that. I come one day to pick up my daughter from kindergarten and the teacher says that something is wrong. I tell her that we already paid attention and we scheduled with an ear doctor because she doesn't respond like all the other kids. As time passes by, we make a lot of noise and she doesn't respond. And we ask everybody that knows, everybody that know things. And we realized maybe it's not just the ears. And at the crucial night before the ear exam, I pray all night and I don't sleep. I pray that I will have a deaf child. I wanted a deaf child because other. All other possibilities were so much more frightening. And our daughter Yael is 27. She's a autistic with severe autism. It was heartbreaking at the beginning. It's very really, it's not easy and I crashed and everything. But at the end, she changed our lives. She taught us a huge lesson about love and about family and for me about being a mother. So Woman of Valor is about really this move between being a nice couple with dreams and things and becoming a family that surrounds a girl with special needs. She's 27 now, Yael. She still doesn't talk, but she started Writing a little bit, a word here and there, which is really opening our hearts and lives for her soul, and it's a huge journey. So thank you so much for saying something about this book. It's really in my heart.

[Zibby Owens]

Oh, my gosh. That scene that you mentioned, I kept tearing up reading the book. And you have a scene later where you talk, I think, to your mom or. No, it was your dad who had never said to you that you were a good mom. And you said finally, after a couple years, you just asked him, you know, why me? Why did this happen to me? Why did this happen to my daughter? And he said, because you were the one who was supposed to do this. This is what you were made for, and you were such a good mom. And how that, like, got to your heart so much, and it's just so moving. It's so moving. And you're like, I didn't think anyone even noticed all my effort. And I feel like that's one of the through lines of this book, is like, you tried so hard. And I feel like so many of us just try so hard, and how sometimes all the trying gets in the way of the bigger picture, and then we kind of lose ourselves and what we wanted. And by the time you get to the end of the book and even your relationship and you find yourself a little bit enough to, like, go on a date with your husband, you know, and then I was like, well, then what happens? You know?

[Lihi Lapid]

Yeah. Yeah. I. I think this line between giving all of ourselves to our family, to the people that need us, and between keeping some of ourselves to ourselves is a line that we need to balance all the time. I can tell you something about the fact that we know that a lot of parents of kids with disabilities are getting divorced because it's such a huge burden on the family on, like, who's in charge, who's paying a bigger price, and the sadness and everything. And that was part of why I wrote this book. In order to hug other families that are going through and to tell them that it's very difficult at the beginning, but at the end, not at the end. There's a moment you need to choose. I remember sitting with Yair, like you say, on a date, going on a date, asking questions about our love. Do we love each other? If we didn't have those kids? If you weren't married already, would you go on a date with me? Would I go on a date with you? And I think we need to make sure that the answer for that is yes. And we need to take time in our lives to have those dates, to continue thinking about us as a couple and not just as mother and father for the same kids. So Yair looked at me at that time and said, this house needs to be a happy house. This home needs to be happy again. And that was my, my main target, to have this house happy for the other kids that lives in it, for us as a couple, and also for Yael, because she really feels if the house is stressed and sad or happy and just hugging her.

[Zibby Owens]

Oh, so beautiful. Can I read a passage that I like, screenshotted? Is that okay? Can I read it? I know we were supposed to talk about something else, but I'm just over the moon obsessed with this book. There are so many passages. Oh, this is another. I mean, there are so many I could read. This is one where you talk about sort of bonding with the other parents of special needs kids. You say, I was thinking about what the group facilitates. So you were in a small group and the facilitator got you all together. This is the first time you've really connected with other parents who had, had. Who have special needs kids. And he had asked you to go around and talk about your hobbies, which of course is a joke because nobody had any time and all of your emotions were fried and everything. So you say I was think what the group facilitator asked us about hobbies. And I remembered that once I had dreams. Not just about children, not just about my baby girl. Once before everything came crashing down, before nights turned into days, before teachers filled the house and worked with her in her room. And my man and I sat on the other side of the closed door, listening to her cry, torn apart by how difficult it is for her. And I curled up in the circle of my beloved man's embrace, wanting to scream and wanting only to wake up from this nightmare. And I remembered that before all of this, before this dizzying cycle of awful exhaustion and anger and heart wrenching sorrow, I had dreams about myself. Dreams that I hadn't dared dream for a long time, that I was ashamed to dream. Because how could I even dare to want something for myself when I was supposed to think only about her? And I started realizing that if I didn't have dreams to escape to, I would fall apart. Today's episode has been sponsored by Fast Growing Trees. Did you know Fast Growing Trees is the biggest online nursery in the US with thousands of different plants and over 2 million happy customers. They have all the plants your yard or house needs, like fruit trees, privacy Trees, flowering trees, shrubs and so much more. Whatever plants you're interested in, Fast Growing Trees has you covered. Find the perfect fit for your climate and space. Fast Growing Trees makes it easy to get your dream yard. Order online and get your plants delivered directly to your door in just a few days without ever leaving home. Their alive and thrive guarantee ensures your plants arrive happy and healthy. Plus get support from trained plant experts on call to help you plan your landscape, choose the right plants and learn how to care for them. I am obsessed with the fiddle leaf fig tree, an indoor plant that I got from Fast Growing Trees. It is so beautiful and it just came right to my door. No annoying trip to a nursery or I once had to go in midtown in New York City, not even midtown, all the way to the flower district to find a tree and put it in the car. And that was such a pain. Anyway, now these came right. Everything comes right to my door and it's amazing. This spring they have the best deals for your yard, up to half off on select plants and other deals and listeners to our show get 15% off their first purchase when using the code Readbooks at checkout. That's an additional 15% off at fast growingtrees.com using the code readbooks at checkout. Fast growingtrees.com code readbooks now's the perfect time to plant indoors or out. Use Readbooks to save today. Offer is valid for a limited time. Terms and conditions may apply. Today's episode has been sponsored by Quince. It is spring and I have so many travel plans from book touring to travel with my kids to everything else. So this year I am treating myself to the luxe upgrades I deserve with Quince's high quality travel essentials at fair prices. And seriously, these prices are amazing whether you get this beautiful cashmere blue throw which I got because you know, how nice is it to wrap yourself in a cozy blanket because airplanes don't give you blankets anymore and a navy blue suitcase. They have this fabulous hard shell carry on suitcase that I am just so excited to use. The best part about Quince, all items are 50 to 80% less than similar brands. By partnering with top factories, Quince cuts out the cost of the middleman and passes the savings on to us. And and Quince only works with factories that use safe, ethical and responsible manufacturing practices and premium fabrics and finishes which I just love. So for your next trip, treat yourself to the luxe upgrades you deserve from quince. Go to quince.comzybee for 365 day returns plus free shipping on your order. That's Q U I n c e dot com Zivi to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quinn's dot com Zibby.

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[Lihi Lapid]

Well, thank you for this paragraph for reading.

[Zibby Owens]

It's so beautiful. I mean, wait, one more. Hold on.

[Lihi Lapid]

I'm just saying for the people that are joining us, really, that we were supposed to talk about in our book.

[Zibby Owens]

I'm sorry.

[Lihi Lapid]

No, no, no, you don't need. It's so. You know, I think that the fact that this book, that my previous book got into your heart, that's the truth of the thing. Wow. It's. It's. It's really so strong for me to. To come back to it. Now try to imagine I wrote it when she was like 12. It took me a few years to publish it because I was so afraid. And now for you to read it when she's 27 and I know who she is. And you know what, like you said before, so many years passed and I fulfilled a lot of dreams that I almost gave up on them, but I could do them a few years later, which is amazing. Thank you. Yeah. I want to read the other paragraph for you to read.

[Zibby Owens]

Oh, okay. Okay. The other paragraph. And then I promise I'll ask you about your new book. You write a lot about comparison, right? And you actually have sort of a foil for your own family with this prince and princess after the fairy tale, which is so interesting, how you set that up and then how they end up connecting later. I was like, that's genius. Okay. And you always think like, her life is better and then you talk. Well, here, I'll just start. One evening, it's her turn to host the girls night out. And they arrive, all her girlfriends, all of those who never stop, who keep constantly moving on in the race, working and growing. One is a psychologist, one is a doctor, and one is a teacher without Even noticing they scatter around stories of success, of achievements, of failures, of struggles, of an exciting life, of wild, unapologetic shopping sprees that they don't have to justify to anyone, of exhilarating trips abroad. And all the while they compliment her on her lovely palace, her tidy children and her tasty dishes, compliments that until recently were her adequate compensation, a source of pride and satisfaction, a sense of achievement and success, and suddenly seemed to her like empty shells. This palace which she licks clean, the children whom she nurtures, the dishes that she cooks, all these things that she puts her heart and soul into, that she dedicates all her time to, suddenly seems so unimportant. Yes, okay, the house is clean, there's hot food, and the children are attended to. But they don't seem much happier than her friends, children and not much more successful than them. She, who had no less potential than them, if not more, who was supposed to prance around the world wearing designer gowns, who was supposed to buy whatever she felt like buying, who was destined for greatness and success, is now receiving compliments on her clean house, on her cooking. And now these compliments of theirs insult her, anger her. She feels as though she doesn't deserve compliments. She hasn't achieved anything unique. She knows that each and every one of her friends could have a house like this were they sitting at home all day, licking it clean. And she can no longer lie to herself. She can no longer say to herself that she's happy, that she's content, that she's doing the most important thing in the world.

[Lihi Lapid]

Wow. Wow.

[Zibby Owens]

You should go reread this book. Yeah.

[Lihi Lapid]

Yeah, I will.

[Zibby Owens]

It is so powerful. So you wrote this book. In the book, you write about writing another book. What book was that? Because you carve out the time with, like, all your might to find the moments in your crazy life to write and how important writing itself is to you, and then you get published and it's a bestseller. And is that the book that wasn't translated?

[Lihi Lapid]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was the first book that was. Yeah, that wasn't. That was. Yeah, that changed. The first one, changed my life because I became a writer.

[Zibby Owens]

Right.

[Lihi Lapid]

With a column in the newspaper. It's a big newspaper. I can tell you that when they offered me the column, of course they said, wow, you wrote women's book, so we want to offer you a woman's column. So we need recipes and we need tips for the. And I said, but I don't know how to cook. I'm burning Also salads, like. And then I realized that that's what they want. And it was a moment, you know, it was also, it was a moment in my life that I drove home and I said, are you really going to write a column for the newspaper with tips that you don't have and recipes when you don't know how to cook? And another voice in me said, they are offering you a page in the most read newspaper in Israel. You're taking it and you will make it what you want of it to be. And I gathered all my friends, all my girlfriends, and I said, each one of you gives me her best recipe, her most simple, easy to make recipe. And I started with recipes, and at the end, it was 15 years that I wrote at the end, whatever I wanted about life, about life in Israel, about things like that. And it was. I'm very happy I did it. It really changed my life. Writing a column.

[Zibby Owens]

Wow. And then you include a lot of the questions that came into the column, which are also beautiful. Okay, so then what happened? When did you write this book and tell listeners about, about your latest book and everything?

[Lihi Lapid]

Okay, So I wrote 15 years, my column. And then I was fired from the column in the newspaper because my husband is a politician and to be. It got too complicated. And then I said, okay, now I don't have any other excuse why I don't write another novel. And I talked to a friend of mine that we tried to write something for tv which didn't work out. And she said, do you have any story? And I said, yes, I have a story about an old woman going down the stairs at the middle of the night. And on the stairwell, it's old Tel Aviv, old building, there's a girl named Nina, 18 year old, that runs away from home and from bed. People that are chasing her with her miniskirt torn, she's hiding there, when this old woman opens the light and looks at her and says, dana, my Dana, you came back for me. But she's Nina, she's not Dana. And she goes to live with this old woman, Carmela, trying to be her granddaughter that lives far away in America. And I had this beginning of a story and she just SMS'd me every day, not every day, every two weeks, like what's happening with Nina and Carmela, my friend, that she's the editor. And I told her I don't have time to write always here in Israel there are politics and elections all the time and things happening. And then she said it was much before the war, and she said, One day she texted me and she said, I will never ask about them. If you won't write them, they will stay in the stairwell in Tel Aviv. And then I couldn't leave them there. So I started writing them like I didn't have any other choice.

[Zibby Owens]

Oh my gosh. So then how long did you spend on this book?

[Lihi Lapid]

I spent like, I think two years I spent on this book. I needed there few subjects that are rising in this book. So first of all is the thing that there's a family, an Israeli family, that the son lives in America, which my brother lived for 30 years in LA. So it's really. I saw my parents seeing their grandchildren growing up speaking a language that is very hard for my parents. My parents are simple people with a store and they don't speak great English. So it was very difficult for them to see grandkids, that they can't really be there for them because they are very close to my kids and my sister kids and the kids in America, the grandkids in America. And I thought more and more families are having this, having grandchildren far away, outside of their state or country. And how do you keep a family strong together? How you keep a family happy and loving even when people live far away? I see a lot of Jews in America that their kids decided to do aliyah to Israel and suddenly they are very far away. And how do you keep it? And I think in this global world that a lot of kids are, a lot of adult kids are doing relocations and things like that and live far away from their parents. So after so many years, I wrote about what we owe our kids, how to be a wonderful mother or a good enough mother. I wrote about do our kids owe us something? What can we ask them? Can we ask them to be there when we grow older and watch us? And how do we do it? And what about their dreams? So in a way, it started from that, but I needed to do a lot of research about. There's a little bit of the things of dimension there about the mother that is slowly forgetting things. And. And I think one of the most strong things that happened to me was the book that it was being published was published in Israel and was a success. But when Harper's Collins, which is a very distinguished publishing house in America, decided that they want to publish it, I was very, very happy. But it was out at the middle of the war, It's March of 24. And when it went out, I said to myself, wow, it's such a bad time for an Israeli book to be published. And also I remember when the publishing house wanted a store to do, to find a store in Manhattan to have me, you know, to have some kind of party and. And no bookstore wanted to host us because it was really, I think they were afraid of riots. And it took us time to understand that that's the reason we can't find any store of books in Manhattan to do it. But then I thought about the fact that in this book the old woman lost her son at war 30 years ago. And I thought that there is something in the way the book is written. Like it's about a family. And the thing that I think gets out the most in this book is that for Israelis, a soldier is not a war machine. It's not someone that dreamt of being Rambo, okay? It's not. In Israel, a soldier is our son that got to the age of 18 and needs to go and defend his country. And some of them dies or being killed. And I think this book really gives this notion of it's just a child that went one day to the army and didn't come back. And for this book to be published after the 7th of October was so strong that I know not a lot of people that either are not Jewish will read it. But I think whoever will read it will get this notion of what it is to be an Israeli mom that sends her son to the army. I remember this when my son Lior was 18 and he did to go to the army and he wanted to be a fighter. And I said to myself, if something happens to him, I have only my daughter that I need to take care of her. And if something happens to him, no one will take care of me. And I said, it's such a request from a country to ask us, the mothers, to hand our kids. And I think it's something that we Israeli moms, we. We hardly think about because it's so difficult. I'll tell you something, when my son was in the army and he was a fighter, I went to visit him in all kind of bases around Israel and everything. And my mother in law said, if you are already, go there, write a book. So I wrote a book called Being a Soldier's Mom. A wonderful book with a lot of tips and a lot of things. No one bought this book. No one. It was a huge failure. And we sat at the publishing house trying to figure out what happened. Like every book I. And then I said, listen, no Israeli mom wants a book named Being a Soldier's mom next to her bed. It's Too frightening. We just want those three years to pass and for him to come back home safe and healthy. And we don't need. We can't think about it every minute because we will go insane. And especially after this horrible year.

[Zibby Owens]

Oh, my gosh. Well, Dehi, you wrote such a beautiful short piece for our anthology on being Jewish now about exactly this, which is so powerful. And your thoughts on the subject are so profound and so relatable and. And just like, cut to the core of the most vulnerable moments of being a mother or a parent, but particularly a mother. And to give voice to all of that in all these different forms is. It's like plucking an unheard string or something. Something that's deep down and resonates.

[Lihi Lapid]

Thank you. I wanted to really thank you for the opportunity to be on being Jewish now in the anthology and giving the voice of an Israeli mom inside of it, and especially at that time. So it's a big honor. And every week that I see that more people are reading it and buying it. And I tell you something. We met in New York in an evening, in the morning that you did for the anthology. And I had something that I felt all those days that I was there, that for many years, Israelis were very sabra. You know, we have those. We are a little bit arrogant. We don't need anybody. We are okay, we Israelis. And on the other hand, I felt that the Americans said, Jews in America said, there is Israel, it's okay. And after 7th of October, everything changed. I think we Israelis, we were suddenly, we needed so much the support of Jews in America and around the world. Every post that someone wrote about strengthening Israel and believing us and supporting us was so, so important. And people that came to visit and I think also from America and Jews in America felt that Israel needs them a little bit more than they thought before. And I think that it's a horrible year and a half, but what happened was that the bond between Jews in Israel and Jews in America and around the world became so much stronger. And it's really amazing that something like, woke up in this. In this relationship that were, like, too obvious for all of us and suddenly like husband and wife.

[Zibby Owens]

Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Well, thank you for coming on. I could talk to you all day. And thank you for going back in time and reliving a moment that has passed so long ago, because it is a timeless story in Women of Valor and your latest book, too, and everything. So thank you so much.

[Lihi Lapid]

Thank you.

[Zibby Owens]

Thank you.

[Lihi Lapid]

Thank you, Zibi, really, thank you. And hope for better days and for all the hostage to be home between now that we talk and until it will be aired.

[Zibby Owens]

That would be amazing. Thank you. Thank you for listening to Totally Booked with Zibby, formerly Moms don't have Time to Read Books. If you loved the show, tell a friend, leave a review, follow me on Instagram Izzyo and spread the word. Thanks so much. Oh and buy the books.

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[Zibby Owens]

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[Lihi Lapid]

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[Lihi Lapid]

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