Mallary Tenore Tarpley, SLIP: Life in the Middle of Eating Disorder Recovery

Summary

Totally Booked with Zibby: Episode Summary Featuring Mallory Tenore Tarpley on SLIP: Life in the Middle of Eating Disorder Recovery

Release Date: August 8, 2025

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Introduction

In this poignant episode of Totally Booked with Zibby, host Zibby Owens welcomes Mallory Tenore Tarpley, the author of SLIP: Life in the Middle of Eating Disorder Recovery. Mallory, an assistant professor at the University of Texas at Austin and a respected journalist, shares her deeply personal journey through anorexia following the tragic loss of her mother at age 11. The conversation delves into the intricacies of living in the "middle place" between acute illness and full recovery, offering invaluable insights for both survivors and their loved ones.

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Book Overview: Exploring the Middle Place

Mallory provides an overview of her book, explaining that SLIP intertwines her memoir with investigative reportage to examine the ongoing struggle of recovery from anorexia. She describes the "middle place" as a liminal space where individuals are neither acutely ill nor fully recovered, a stage she initially believed to be unique to her experience.

“Slip is really about my own experiences with anorexia... and what it looks like to live with the imprints of your disorder, knowing that it remains a vulnerability.” (05:28)

Through extensive research—surveying and interviewing hundreds of individuals—Mallory discovers that many share this middle ground, prompting her to expand her narrative to include diverse perspectives from fellow sufferers, researchers, and clinicians.

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Personal Journey: From Grief to Anorexia

Mallory recounts the profound impact of her mother's death on her mental health. The loss triggered the onset of anorexia, which she used as a mechanism to cope with her grief and maintain a connection with her mother.

“I was really desperate to find a way to stay close to my mom. I conjured up this idea that somehow if I stayed the same size that my mother was when she was alive, maybe I could become closer to her.” (09:08)

Her narrative includes vivid descriptions of her behaviors during the disorder's peak, such as extreme food restriction and compulsive exercise, leading to severe physical health complications. Mallory emphasizes the intertwined nature of anorexia with her identity, highlighting how the disorder became an intrinsic part of who she was.

“I moved from saying, I have anorexia to I am anorexic. And so for me, it became very much tangled up in my identity.” (11:58)

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Treatment Journey: Navigating the Healthcare System

Mallory details her extensive treatment journey, which included multiple hospitalizations and a prolonged stay in residential treatment. She underscores the critical role of medical intervention in her recovery, reflecting on the challenges and evolution of treatment approaches over the years.

“Treatment has also evolved to make note of that and to have more group therapy sessions where there are kind of more structures around the interactions that patients have.” (16:06)

Her experience in the psychiatric ward was a mix of support and toxicity, as camaraderie among patients sometimes led to competitive behaviors that could hinder recovery. Mallory also shares the heartbreaking loss of friends during her time in treatment, reinforcing the severe risks associated with eating disorders.

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Support Systems: The Pillars of Recovery

A significant part of the discussion centers on the importance of support systems in battling eating disorders. Mallory credits her father and grandmother for their unwavering support during her darkest times, a contrast to many patients who lack such familial backing.

“Support is really critical when you're dealing with an eating disorder. And I think when you don't have support, that's when you can slip into the secrecy and silence more.” (31:00)

In her current recovery, Mallory maintains regular sessions with a therapist and dietitian, and she highlights the value of having a supportive partner and a strong network of family and friends.

“I do still see a therapist and a dietitian... I have an amazing husband who is super supportive.” (32:42)

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Parenting and Prevention: Breaking the Cycle

As a mother, Mallory is acutely aware of the genetic and environmental factors influencing the development of eating disorders. She discusses proactive measures she takes to foster a healthy body image in her children, such as:

• Promoting Body Respect: Teaching that all bodies deserve respect, regardless of size or shape.
• Balanced Conversations About Food: Avoiding labeling foods as "good" or "bad" to prevent the development of restrictive eating habits.
• Open Dialogue: Encouraging her children to share their feelings and concerns about body image and food, leveraging her own experiences to create a safe space for discussion.

“I really try to be respectful toward my body and not put it down in front of them. I really want my kids to feel like they can have open conversations with me about moments where maybe they're not feeling so great.” (25:13)

Mallory also reflects on the challenges of parenting while managing her own recovery, acknowledging that slip-ups can occur but emphasizing the importance of transparency and seeking support when needed.

“A big part of my own recovery has been just being open about my own experiences with an eating disorder and the fact that I'm not over it and that sometimes I still do slip.” (30:38)

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Continued Recovery and Future Outlook

Mallory candidly discusses her ongoing journey toward recovery, recognizing that it is a continuous process rather than a fixed endpoint. She stresses the significance of addressing perfectionism and embracing vulnerability as key components of maintaining mental health.

“I have realized that secrecy can keep us stuck, and eating disorders really thrive in secrecy. And so I think silence and secrecy not only keeps us stuck, but can also keep us sick.” (30:38)

Her commitment to transparency serves as both a personal healing tool and a message of hope to her readers, illustrating that recovery is possible even when complete healing feels elusive.

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Conclusion: Honoring the Past and Embracing the Future

In the closing moments of the conversation, Mallory reflects on the significance of her book as a tribute to her mother's memory and a testament to her resilience. Approaching her 40th birthday— the same age her mother was when she passed—Mallory views SLIP as a bridge between honoring the past and stepping into a new phase of life.

“Slip feels like this ultimate way of honoring her memory and also of beginning this next phase of life.” (35:11)

Zibby Owens extends her heartfelt congratulations, expressing excitement for Mallory's continued impact through her writing and advocacy.

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Key Takeaways

• Understanding the Middle Place: Recovery is not a linear journey; many individuals reside in a liminal space where they are neither fully healthy nor acutely ill.
• The Importance of Support: Strong familial and professional support systems are crucial in navigating and sustaining recovery from eating disorders.
• Parenting with Awareness: Proactively fostering a positive body image and open communication can help prevent the development of eating disorders in the next generation.
• Continuous Recovery: Embracing vulnerability and seeking ongoing support are essential for maintaining mental health and preventing relapse.

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For more information about Mallory Tenore Tarpley and her book, visit zibbyowens.com and follow Zibby on Instagram @zibbyowens.

Transcript

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[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

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[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

Hi.

[Sponsor]

This is Zibby Owens and you're listening.

[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

To Totally Booked with Zibby.

[Sponsor]

Formerly Moms don't have Time to Read Books in my daily show, I interview today's latest best selling, buzziest or underrated authors and story creators whose work I think is worth your time. As a bookstore owner, publisher, author, and obviously podcaster, I get a comprehensive look at everything that's coming out and spend my time curating the best books so you don't have to stay in the know. Get insider insights and connect with guests like I do every single day. For more information, go to zibbedia.com and follow me on Instagram ibyoens Mallory Tenore Tarpley is the author of Life in the Middle of Eating Disorder Recovery. She is an assistant professor at the University of Texas at Austin, where she teaches journalism classes in the Moody College.

[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

Of Communication and writing classes at the.

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McCombs School School of Business. Previously, Mallory was the associate director of UT Austin's Knight center for Journalism in the Americas, an international training and outreach center for journalists. Prior to UT Austin, Mallory was executive director of the nonprofit Images and Voices of Hope, where she developed a storytelling genre called restorative narrative stories that show.

[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

How people and communities are finding meaningful.

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Pathways forward in the aftermath of trauma. Mallory's articles and personal essays have appeared in the New York Times, the Washington.

[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

Post, the Los Angeles Times, Dallas Morning News, Teen Vogue, Harvard University's Nieman Storyboard, among other publications.

[Sponsor]

Mallory holds a bachelor's degree from Providence College and a master's of Fine Arts in nonfiction writing from Goucher College. She lives in the Austin area with her husband and two young children.

[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

Welcome Mallory. Thank you for coming on Totally Booked with Zibby to talk about life in the middle of eating disorder recovery. Congratulations on your book.

Thank you so much for having me.

The way you wrote about the loss of your mom in this book and the aftermath of your grief and everything that happened. It, like, broke my heart in two. Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry.

Yeah, thank you for that. It was a really difficult time in my life.

Why don't you explain sort of the book in general, and then we can delve in deeper into certain parts?

Sure. So Slip is really about my own experiences with anorexia, which I developed after my mom died when I was 11, and looks at my sickness, my treatment for the eating disorder, and really explores my ongoing recovery from the disorder. So in this book, I was really interested in exploring these driving questions of what does it mean to be better from your disorder, but not all better, and what does it look like to live with the imprints of your disorder, knowing that it remains a vulnerability? And so as I explore these questions, I began to think a lot about what I call the middle place, which is this name I've given to this liminal space between acute sickness and full recovery. And I used to think I was the only one in this space. And I began to do a lot of reporting for the book and ended up surveying hundreds of people and interviewing hundreds of people and realized that there are many people who also inhabit this middle place. And so in the book, alongside my own personal experiences, I bring in lots of perspectives from other people with lived experience, but also researchers and clinicians who can speak to some really fascinating research that's out there now about eating disorders and recovery from them.

Wow. Well, I just love the way you told the story through your own experience, how at the end of each chapter, you were bringing in more and more data. So we're getting a look not just at what the landscape was when you were going through it, but how it is today and what advances have been made and what is still lacking. And also how you take us back to this time in the world.

Right.

The influences of Seventeen magazine, which, by the way, I wrote for once, and, you know, all the pressures societally that everybody was putting on girls and women at that time and how that has changed too, all of which are compounded into your story.

Yes. And I'm glad that you just mentioned the research alongside the personal, because that was a challenge structurally, trying to figure out how do I write a book that is really equal parts memoir and reportage? And so I was really interested in exploring that from a structural standpoint. So really tried to think through that and ended up adopting the split chapter approach, where the first half is all personal and very deeply immersive. And Then the second half is written from my present day perspective where I'm bringing in all of the research and insights from others. So in some ways those two halves are always unified by a central theme. But I also think that that approach enabled me to be in conversation with my younger self and for my younger self and present day self to really converse in some ways. On the page, speaking of the voice.

Of your younger self, you include some diary entries and excerpts from when you were young. And as you went through a lot of the things in the book, and again, they were heartbreaking. Some of the longing for your mom. And even when you had a two way dialogue once, which you at the time felt weird about essentially, but then realized it was a very adaptive way of self soothing to have your thoughts and then have your mom respond in writing what she would think or say and help you through when you wrote about that whole trigger. And I know that's just the trigger and the rest of the story follows with the disorder. But when you look back at the whole time and wrote about it, like, were you crying over your keyboard type of thing or what was it like having to revisit this and talking to people who were involved, going back and meeting them and the nurse that you know all of that.

Yeah. So in many ways it was an exercise in excavating my past and reinhabiting my younger self. And so, as you said, I went back and looked at all of my old journals, which were just heartbreaking to read. I mean, I meticulously kept journals after my mom passed away and while I was sick. And it became so clear in looking at those journal entries that I was just desperate to find a way to stay close to my mom. And I had conjured up this idea that somehow if I stayed the same size that my mother was when she was alive, maybe I could become closer to her. And so in looking at these journal entries, it was very clear that I found food restriction to be this warped form of time travel. And of course, the great irony of eating disorders is that they think, we think they're going to give us one thing, but they completely strip it from our lives. So the eating disorder really made me feel like I was out of control and farther away than ever from my mother, ultimately. But it was difficult going back and reading entries related to that and going through all of my old medical records. I did a lot of revisitation too. So I went back to Boston Children's Hospital where I was treated and interviewed the doctor who treated me there, and nurses and really Wanted to be able to experience all of that. And it did feel like I was climbing this emotional Mount Everest and wondering, how do I do this? How do I climb up this mountain? But I did go back to therapy when I was writing this book, because I felt like writing can be therapeutic, but it's not therapy. And there was a lot that I needed to work on, just off the page, so that I could really come to the writing with a clear sense of focus and also with some real intentions around what I wanted to say and how I was going to write my story in a way that was vulnerable but also meaningful for readers.

So when you were young, after the death of your mom, you started restricting your intake, you started jumping, which I was wondering if there was ever an OCD diagnosis in there anywhere, you know, like these compulsions that you had. And anyway, just throwing that out there, as I am an armchair doctor in every way, as in my later years. But anyway, you started jumping a lot and having, you know, picking your hand, like, all these things, maybe something where your hands were all chapped. And by the time you got to the inpatient unit, which, thankfully, you were admitted to in time, your heart rate was down to 40 beats per minute, and you had Laguna hair all over you and your fingers were blue. I mean, it was. It was almost hard to read your description of yourself at the beginning of your treatment. Tell me a little more about that.

Yeah, so it was really helpful having my medical records and being able to actually look at those, because I had certain memories of what my body felt like and what I was going. But then to actually go back and look at the medical records for confirmation, it was heartbreaking in a lot of ways because, I mean, my father took me to Boston Children's Hospital, and neither of us knew what I was struggling with. We really didn't have a name for it because I thought people with eating disorders didn't eat anything at all. And I was still eating, albeit not a lot. And my father, his only real point of reference for eating disorders was the death of Karen Carpenter, and he thought that eating disorders only affected adults. And so we were both, in some ways, surprised to get the diagnosis of anorexia nervosa when I went to Boston Children's. But in looking back, it was quite clear that the doctors were quite afraid that I could suffer heart complications and other really serious medical complications if I wasn't hospitalized. And it is true, too, to your point. I mean, jumping was my form of exercise, which, looking back at it now, I mean, it Seems so childish. And I was only 12, 13 years old. So instead, ways it was fitting. But I did get diagnosed as well with anxiety and depression and severe obsessive compulsive disorder. And those are comorbidities that are very common among people with eating disorders. But it was very interesting reading the doctor's notes about just how entrenched I was in my eating disorder and how I very much identified as someone with anorexia. And I distinctly remember this point where I moved from saying, I have anorexia to I am anorexic. And so for me, it became very much tangled up in my identity. And that became even more so. The case once I kind of was living this institutionalized life of being in and out of the hospital.

And then you detail all of the treatment. How many days? What was like 584 days? Something like that? So many days in and out. And then in the treatment center that you were in after Granger House, what was it called? Granger House.

It was called Jermaine Lawrence.

Jermaine Lawrence. Sorry, I had the G. But anyway, and I was really struck, too, by your time on the eating disorders psychiatric ward, like the eating disorders which I have worked at an inpatient unit in the adolescent inpatient unit at a psychiatric hospital. And I know how the kids would swap different tricks for beating different systems and the. The levels of independence they got and all that. And you talk about the camaraderie amongst the girls, but also how that can backfire, too, when you're competitive and tricks of the game. And then. And then when you looked back and found out that two of your good friends had passed away and they're like one in their 20s, one in their 30s, it was just so sad. Right? Tell me about those friendships and that particular experience and the role of friendship when you're struggling with something like this.

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[Mallory Tenore Tarpley]

Yes. So when I was on the psychiatric ward, it was really the first time I had met other girls and boys. There was one boy on the ward with eating disorders. And so in some ways, it felt supportive because we could commiserate and we could talk with each other. But in other ways, it was toxic because we did share tips and tricks on how to get away with exercising or things of that nature. And this was also at a time where we didn't have social media. So this was the late 90s. And so we hadn't been exposed to this in the ways that some teenagers and adolescents are kind of exposed to it now. And so in some ways, I got all of these new ideas about how to get better at my eating disorder. And I think that I got the best treatment that I could have at the time. But I think treatment has also evolved to make note of that and to have more group therapy sessions where there are kind of more structures around the interactions that patients have. But it was difficult just being in that environment and feeling like I was really surrounded by people with the eating disorder. And again, I think that's part of why it really became part of my identity. And I came to feel like the psychiatric ward was a safe place for me because I felt like every time I left, I would fall back into the same behaviors. And so that was really challenging. And that was ultimately why they decided to have me go into residential treatment. And I was there for 17 months, which is almost unheard of these days. And I was very fortunate. And that my public school system and the Department of Mental Health in Massachusetts, where I grew up, they were able to cover the costs. Otherwise, there was no way I would have been able to afford treatment, because that's one of the main barriers to care for folks with eating disorders. But, yeah, that was a really challenging time in my life because you've worked on one, you know what a psychiatric ward is like, but most people don't. Right. And it's hard to really describe that. And I actually tried to go back onto the ward when I was doing these revisitations. And the clinician who was walking me through the halls of Boston Children's, she worked there, but she didn't even know quite how to access the ward. It was always very hidden and still remains so today. And so I thought, well, some places in our life can sort of be part of our past, but they don't necessarily need to invade our presence. So I thought maybe in some ways it was a gift that I wasn't able to access it or wasn't even able to see the entrance to the ward because that was a really painful part of my past.

I had a very, very close friend in high school who ended up taking her own life, but she struggled with anorexia and bulimia and was hospitalized. And I visited her at two of her hospitalizations and got to see. And you were allowed on those wards, I guess, because I remember seeing her in bed and everything and just how vulnerable you are when you're hospitalized for something like this. And of course with eating disorders like this, you are so frail physically, right? You're just. I just like wanted to go in and hug everyone there because it's just seeing somebody and knowing that it's not because they are fighting cancer, but it is something in their brain that is causing this. And having. It's just as much a struggle, right? It's just as much a sickness. And I feel like unfortunately, anorexia and they get such a. Not a bad rap. I mean, that's the wrong way to say it, but that it feel that people can misconstrue it as something that's just about how you look and that's not it at all. I mean, it's about so many things and then as you say, especially when it happens early, it really changes your brain chemistry and your body and your development and all of it.

Yes, very much so. And I mean to the point where scientists now refer to eating disorders as brain disorders, because there are kind of these alterations in the brain that occur when one does have a severe eating disorder. And this was not known at the time when I was in treatment. And there's so much more research that's out now, but there's a lot of sort of these brain based alterations that can keep people stuck in a cognitive rut and that can keep people from getting better. And it's interesting what you had mentioned earlier about two of the girls I was in treatment with who passed away. And I remember I had an interview with the mother of one of those girls. I had reached out to her several times and thought, oh, she probably doesn't want to talk with me. I don't know her. I don't want to conjure up these painful memories. But we did end up talking and I include this in the book. But she talked about how much she tried to help her daughter and how much treatment she provided for her daughter and yet ultimately couldn't save her. And so I think it was this really sort of powerful moment and heartbreaking moment in which, again, I remembered that eating disorders are not a choice, and they're not about a diet. They are these really harmful disorders that are so easy to get caught up in, and they can take lives. And I've seen that firsthand. And so I have a lot of just empathy for people who are really struggling and acutely sick, and a lot of empathy for my younger self, because I look back and I just realize how toxic the eating disorder was in my life. And it's still something I contend with to an extent. But I'm grateful that I'm in a far better place than I was when I was younger.

How do you feel now? Because you take us through the rest of your story. Falling in love, having kids, which of course, also, I mean, anyone having a child has to deal with what their body looks like, changing shape and being essentially out of their own control again, as it's, like, inhabited by somebody else. But as you raise your kids and as so many people struggle now with the TikTok of it all and the rise of eating disorders during COVID and all of that, like, what is your perspective on making sure the next generation has it a little bit easier or has the supports they need, or how do you view your role in this whole system?

I think about this a lot as a mom, so my kids are 7 and 9, and I know that. But there are lots of factors that go into eating disorders, including genetics. So research does show that females who have a relative with anorexia are 11 times more likely to develop the disorder themselves. But even though this is a really scary statistic, it's also important to know that we don't inherit eating disorders. We inherit a vulnerability to them. So in other words, we're not doomed if we're the child of someone with an eating disorder, nor are our children doomed if we have an eating disorder. But knowing all of this, I try really hard to just provide a really safe environment for my kids. And I'm sure, especially once they're of the age, that they can go on social media, it's going to be a lot harder to sort of control that environment, so to speak. But right now, I really think a lot about this. And I try to teach my kids that all bodies are worthy of respect, no matter how short or tall or big or small. And. And even though I still have a lot of bad body image days, I never put my body down in front of my kids. I really don't want them to be immersed in this home environment that is rooted in any sort of diet culture or fat phobia. And so sometimes it can feel a little bit like I'm faking it till I make it, but I really try to be respectful toward my body and not put it down in front of them. And I'm also really conscious about how I talk about food with my kids. So I don't talk about foods as being good or bad or healthy or unhealthy. Because kids oftentimes think in terms of black and white, it's harder for them to capture nuance. And so sometimes when we talk about food in this way, it can be easy for kids to think, well, I'm bad if I eat, quote, unquote, bad foods, or I'm good if I eat, quote, unquote, good foods. And. And I know from my own experiences, when I was in the seventh grade, I was in a health class that really kind of taught us about good and bad foods, quote, unquote. And that was one of the many factors that led me to think about food restriction as a way of controlling my body and the way it looked. And fast forward 25 years, and my kids have had similar assignments in school. And so we're still talking about foods in these very black and white ways without a whole lot of nuance. And so I'm very conscious about that in terms of how I interact with my kids and my kids. I mean, I also want them to know about my story. And I've been thinking about this a lot as the book goes out into the world. So I have begun to have pretty basic conversations with my kids about eating disorders and my own story so that they're at least aware of what eating disorders are and so that they feel like they can come to me if they're ever in a place where they're not treating their bodies with respect or not giving their bodies the food or fuel that they need.

That's great. I know. I feel like as parents, we always have to be checking what we say. What are we modeling? What are we doing? I mean, the other day, my daughter was taking a picture of me, and I looked at it, and I was like, oh, wait, let me do it again. Let me suck in my stomach. And I was like, I cannot believe I just said that. I can't believe I thought it. I can't believe I even said it out loud in front of my impressionable daughter. I feel like I need to be arrested by the parenting police for this move because I'm so conscious of never saying anything, being so. Because you always do in response to whatever you had sometimes. Right. We all have our things. But anyway, I was feeling like such a failure because at least we all now try to protect in the ways that we can. Except for slip ups like that. Slip.

Yes, exactly. But it's hard. I mean, I grapple with it all the time. And my kids are asking me, mom, can I have a snack? Can I have a treat? Like when? And it's 10 minutes before dinner. I mean, those conversations can be hard to have because I don't want them to have a restrictive mindset. But sometimes there are moments where I'll just say, just ask your father. Right. And knowing that my husband can step in and support in those moments where maybe it feels a little overwhelming, I have found that to be helpful.

Yeah, that's a good. That's a good trick. I know. I feel like I'm so permissive with food. Like, oh, can we get an ice cream? And then we're have dinner an hour. And I'm like, sure, you know, because I don't want to say no to any of it. You do. It's your body. Tell me if you're hungry. Like, yeah, you think you'll eat dinner? How are you going to get your protein? I don't know. It's always a mess. But of course, eating disorders, your eating disorder, on top of the baseline stress of raising kids with positive body image is a lot. And I know that you didn't devote too, too much time to this in the book, and the bulk of it was sort of your coming of age story and how you survived, which at times felt like not a given at all, and how you worked through it. But I don't know, I feel like right now, the moment that you're in, especially about to have teenagers and kids going through that, like, how are you gonna. How are you steeling yourself for that? Like, how are you, do you look to external help? I know you've interviewed a thousand people for the book. Like, what is something that you took from it that you're gonna use to help yourself so it doesn't drag you back down into a dark place.

Yeah. So I think one thing for me is that I am a perfectionist. And so I used to think I had to be really perfect at my recovery. And I see that trickle into my parenting as well, where sometimes I think, oh, I've gotta be the perfect mom and do all the Things and work and be with them and write a book. And. And so I do have to watch that, just as I think about how I talk about bodies and food with my kids, because I recognize that no matter how hard I try, they're probably still going to have bad body image days. They may end up developing, you know, behaviors, or they may end up going on skinny talk or seeing some things one day that I would prefer that they not see. And so I think for me, just, I have realized that secrecy can keep us stuck, and eating disorders really thrive in secrecy. And so I think silence and secrecy not only keeps us stuck, but can also keep us sick. And a big part of my own recovery has been just being open about my own experiences with an eating disorder and the fact that I'm not over it and that sometimes I still do slip. And so I think for me, that's been really healing to be able to be super honest about that. And I think the book is the most honest piece of work I've ever put out into the world. And so, as I think about how that translates to my parenting, I really want my kids to feel like they can have open conversations with me about moments where maybe they're not feeling so great about who they are or what they're putting into their bodies or what their bodies look like. And I never want them to feel like, oh, well, mom has had an eating disorder, so I can't talk with her about these things. And so the open communication was so helpful for me. And so I want to encourage my kids to feel like they can come to me when they have these concerns and that we can really just have dialogue about them so that they're not kind of secretly or silently struggling or wondering what the content they're seeing on social media or elsewhere means for them and their bodies, and what does your.

Support system look like right now?

So I do still see a therapist and a dietitian, and five years ago, I probably would have been sheepish about saying that. But I do think that it's really just been helpful in terms of being able to stay active in my recovery. And I always say that I'm kind of in recovery as opposed to fully recovered. It's hard to even know what full recovery means from an eating disorder, especially in our society, which is so steep in diet culture. But I have the therapist and dietitian. I also have an amazing husband who is super supportive and really understands my own lived experience and can really just help me in times when I feel like I need a little Extra support. So those are my main support systems. And I'm lucky to have just a great family and friends. And so I am fortunate in that sense. And I remember when I was in residential treatment, I was there with a lot of girls who did not have a home to go to. They were in and out of the foster care system or they'd been abandoned by their parents. And so even then, I knew that I was fortunate to have my father. I had a loving grandmother who had stepped in to help after my mom passed away. And so support is really critical when you're dealing with an eating disorder. And I think when you don't have support, that's when you can slip into the secrecy and silence more.

Well, I'm so glad that you have that whole system, because the image of you coming home from school the day that your mom died to an empty house and just, like, putting on some Arthur cartoons. Cause it was just so quiet and, like, not having a snack put out. Oh, my gosh. I feel like I'm gonna Haunted. Haunted by the sadness of that. I'm just so sorry you went through that. And anyway, I'm also glad we're doing an event together at the core Club. I'm excited to introduce you to the other authors and have an open talk about all this, because their stories are not the same, but there are similarities in the journey. So, yes, I can't wait to hear you all talk about it. I just want to be a fly on the wall and just, like, let you all talk. So I can't wait for that too.

Yes. I'm so excited about that.

Amazing. Okay, Mallory, congratulations. It's been such a pleasure to have met you on one of our retreats and have you say, I'm, like, writing a book and then seeing the COVID and now it's about to come out, and it's just so exciting. I'm so excited for you. I hope that it brings you everything that you hope and more. Thank you.

Yes. And it feels like a really special moment in time, too, because I'm about to turn 40, and my mom was 40 when she passed away. And so I've been thinking a lot about what does it mean to outlive your mother and to enter a phase of life that she never got to experience. So in many ways, Slipp feels like this ultimate way of honoring her memory and also of beginning this next phase of life.

I love it. Well, congratulations.

Thank you so much.

Thanks, Valerie. Okay, I'll talk to you soon. Bye. Bye.

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