Totally Booked with Zibby
Episode: Valerie Gilpeer and Emily Grodin, I HAVE BEEN BURIED UNDER YEARS OF DUST: A Memoir of Autism and Hope
Air Date: August 22, 2025
Host: Zibby Owens
Guests: Valerie Gilpeer & Emily Grodin

Episode Overview

In this powerful and heartfelt episode, Zibby Owens sits down with mother-daughter co-authors Valerie Gilpeer and Emily Grodin to discuss their memoir, I Have Been Buried Under Years of Dust: A Memoir of Autism and Hope. The conversation explores Emily's extraordinary breakthrough as a minimally speaking person with autism who found her voice at age 25—shifting the lives of both Emily and her family. Together, the trio digs into the realities of living with autism, the importance of communication technology, the power of persistence and hope, and how sharing their story has impacted them and inspired others.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Emily’s Communication Breakthrough

[05:15] Valerie Gilpeer:

• Emily had endured 25 years of speech and various therapies with little success in spoken communication.
• The pivotal moment came after a difficult experience during a trip to Ireland. Upon returning home during a meltdown, Emily sat down and typed her first fully expressive sentence:

  "I have been buried under years of dust, and now I have so much to say." – Valerie Gilpeer relaying Emily’s words [06:17]

• This marked the beginning of Emily’s ability to communicate through typing, transforming not just her own life, but her family's as well.
• Valerie highlights the almost “magical” aspect of the breakthrough, referencing the trip’s missed opportunity to kiss the Blarney Stone and instead, Emily kissing the castle—a symbolic act they came to cherish.

2. The Memoir & Its Purpose

[08:26] Emily Grodin (voiceover):

• Emily describes the memoir as a very personal account spanning her family’s journey in a world unfit for autistic individuals, focusing on resilience, trial and error, and the universal search for acceptance and communication.

  "The memoir is about me and my parents journey navigating autism in a world that was not built for autistic people. It is about resilience. It's about trial and error. The book is very personal as it is filled with our experiences spanning my entire life, the good and the bad. And yet I think it is an incredibly familiar story to so many." – Emily Grodin [08:26]

• Emily’s poetry is included to give readers intimate glimpses into her sensory experiences, social struggles, and life as a minimally speaking person.

3. Impact of Technology on Connection

[09:15] Zibby Owens | [09:38] Valerie Gilpeer:

• Zibby marvels at the power of communication technology to unlock the inner world of someone previously unable to speak fully.
• Valerie reflects on how being able to truly know her daughter changed everything for their family:

  "Knowing what she wants—what a person wants in their inner thoughts and feelings—is a whole new experience..." – Valerie Gilpeer [10:21]

• Valerie and Zibby agree that communication technology gives families and individuals not just new opportunities, but entirely new relationships.

4. Creativity, Potential, and Individuality

[14:25] Zibby Owens | [14:53] Emily Grodin:

• Zibby asks if all autistic people might be similarly capable if given the right tools.

  "I think everyone is creative. They just need the proper tools and an extra lending hand to get to where they want to be." – Emily Grodin [14:53]

• Valerie agrees that while everyone’s level of talent will differ, communication is the key to unlocking individual gifts and full participation in life.

5. Life After the Breakthrough and Book

[15:54] Zibby Owens | [15:59] Valerie Gilpeer | [16:34] Emily Grodin:

• Both Valerie and Emily detail the ways Emily’s life—and their family dynamic—transformed after she could communicate:
  • Emily is now a university senior, a lead in a film project, part of a community of others who communicate by typing, and a talented poet and writer.
  • Inspiration from their story gives hope to other families to "never give up and fight for their loved ones, just like my mom did for me." – Emily Grodin [16:34]
• Valerie expresses immense gratitude for finally being able to know her daughter deeply, and how persistent advocacy and hope led to a “miraculous” change in all their lives.

6. Practical Advice for Families and Educators

[18:47] Zibby Owens | [19:07] Valerie Gilpeer:

• When asked how others can help autistic individuals find similar breakthroughs, Valerie recommends:
  • Seeking out experienced providers in alternative communication methods (e.g., Darlene Hansen in LA, S2C/Speech to Communicate in Virginia, SOMA’s Rapid Prompt method in Texas).
  • Googling “alternative forms of communication” or joining online groups for resources and support.
  • Recognizing that not every individual’s journey will be identical, but that experimentation, patience, collaboration, and not giving up are essential.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Emily’s Breakthrough Statement:

  "I have been buried under years of dust, and now I have so much to say." – relayed by Valerie Gilpeer [06:17]

• On Universal Creativity:

  "I think everyone is creative. They just need the proper tools and an extra lending hand to get to where they want to be." – Emily Grodin [14:53]

• On Joy of True Connection:

  "Knowing what she wants—what a person wants in their inner thoughts and feelings—is a whole new experience... In our community, this opportunity that comes with communication for the first time changes everyone's life." – Valerie Gilpeer [10:21]

• Family Gratitude:

  "She's had such a level of gratitude for everything that we've done for her and so happy, you know, to be in the place that she's in. And she lets us know that all the time." – Valerie Gilpeer [16:53]

• Encouragement to Listeners:

  "If someone is listening and they have someone they love who is autistic... how do they get access to this technology?... I think people can Google alternative forms of communication and they will come up with all kinds of stuff either on Google or on Facebook." – Valerie Gilpeer [19:07]

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 05:15 — Valerie recounts Emily’s breakthrough moment and the family’s struggles before it.
• 08:26 — Emily reads her summary of the memoir and its intentions.
• 09:38 — Valerie reflects on the emotional impact of finally knowing her daughter through typed communication.
• 14:53 — Emily offers her perspective on creativity and the necessity of proper support.
• 16:34 — Emily shares what the book’s success and her new opportunities have meant for her.
• 19:07 — Valerie gives practical advice and resources for families seeking communication tools.

Episode Tone & Style

• The conversation is intimate, honest, hopeful, and punctuated by moments of awe and wonder at what’s possible.
• Valerie is candid and warm, clearly moved by her daughter’s progress.
• Emily’s contributions, whether typed and voiced or direct, are thoughtful, poetic, and modest.
• Zibby’s style is supportive, enthusiastic, and deeply empathetic, asking both practical and philosophical questions.

Closing Thoughts

This episode captures the transformative power of communication—for individuals and families—and highlights the importance of perseverance, creative problem-solving, and hope for those navigating the world of autism. Valerie and Emily’s story is an inspiration, showing listeners that connection and understanding are always possible, even after decades of silence.

For those seeking support or guidance, Valerie encourages exploring alternative forms of communication and reading their book, I Have Been Buried Under Years of Dust: A Memoir of Autism and Hope, for both practical advice and inspiration.