Trade Tales: “Ask Us Anything: Erin Gates on Clients Who Disrupt the Design Process”

Host: Kaitlin Petersen (Business of Home)
Guest: Erin Gates (Interior Designer, Author)
Date: December 24, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode of Trade Tales zeroes in on a challenge every interior designer faces: what to do when a previously absent client suddenly steps in late in the project, upending months of planning and creative energy. Host Kaitlin Petersen welcomes acclaimed designer Erin Gates to reflect on these scenarios, offering practical advice on safeguarding your design process, keeping morale high, and handling contract nuances and client relationships.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Disruptive Client Scenario (00:04 – 03:32)

• Kaitlin shares a real-life design dilemma submitted by a listener: With the design almost finalized, an uninvolved client’s spouse arrives with strong opinions, causing upheaval. The team must pivot, risking budget and morale.
• The design contract required all stakeholders’ participation, but enforcing this proved challenging.

Quote:

“Felt like he threw a grenade in the middle of the project. And I was like, what just happened?”
— Question Asker (01:33)

2. Introducing Erin Gates (05:11 – 07:17)

• Erin is welcomed as someone who’s not only built creative authority but also knows how to protect her firm and set boundaries with clients.
• Erin discusses her whirlwind years—publishing a book, running her business, and family life.

Quote:

“I want to do better, but do less.”
— Erin Gates (07:22)

3. Trends in Home and Client Demands Post-Pandemic (08:28 – 12:37)

• Erin’s new book centers on creating “forever” homes, a reaction to a culture of flipping and a newfound post-pandemic appreciation for home.
• Clients are more emotionally and financially invested, leading to increased “hand holding,” more questions about quality, timelines, and procurement.

Quote:

“I think everybody is kind of valuing their homes a little bit more these days. And this is kind of an exploration of... how we help people create these spaces that they want to stay in.”
— Erin Gates (09:35)

4. Team Structure & Specialization (11:57 – 12:37)

• Erin shares her business structure: a dedicated design team and a separate procurement team. This helps clients get prompt, specialized responses and streamlines processes.

5. The Importance of Blogging & Community (14:14 – 15:28)

• Erin values the depth and community of long-form blogging, which she sees as vital for both personal connection and professional development, especially compared to the fleeting nature of social media.

Quote:

“It helped create a real sense of community amongst people who followed me... it really helped my quality of life having this community to bounce ideas off of.”
— Erin Gates (15:07)

Erin Gates’ Advice on Handling Disruptive Clients

6. Is This Scenario Familiar? (15:36 – 18:10)

• Erin confirms it’s a common problem and praises the caller for requiring all stakeholders at meetings—even if that’s unenforceable in reality.
• She says, ultimately: “Money talks.”

Quote:

“This is why I never flat fee anything.”
— Erin Gates (17:55)

7. Spotting Trouble Early & Contract Strategies (18:12 – 20:08)

• Usually, spouses with strong opinions show their hand early. Some responsibility falls on the participating partner to loop the other in.
• Erin’s advice: Avoid flat fees, or be restrictively clear about their scope; otherwise, ensure hourly billing for rework.

Quote:

“All I can say is money talks... going back and redoing all of this is going to cost you a lot of money.”
— Erin Gates (17:55)

8. Establishing Paper Trails & Communication (20:08 – 22:15)

• Always copy both spouses (or all stakeholders) on correspondence.
• Documented communication is not just best-practice—it's critical when disputes arise.

9. Client Onboarding & Assessing Stakeholders (22:16 – 25:09)

• Erin treats onboarding as a two-way interview to surface potential red flags.
• Ask directly about who will be involved and their opinion patterns. Set expectations on budget, timeline, and decision-making styles.

Quote:

“Setting expectations at the beginning... is the most valuable part. And that is trust.”
— Erin Gates (24:02)

10. Ongoing Check-Ins (25:09 – 28:08)

• Check in with the “involved” spouse if the other partner is absent. Sometimes, the absence is benign; other times, it’s worth investigating further to avoid surprises.

11. Direct Communication & Boundaries (28:08 – 30:35)

• If disrupted, Erin recommends being direct: explain the impact on the timeline and budget, and require the disruptor to be present henceforth or to sign off on decisions.
• If disruption persists, consider ending the client relationship.

Quote:

“If you're fine with that [paying more for a redesign], I guess I'm fine with that.”
— Erin Gates (28:19)
“Trust goes both ways... it’s very hard to say no. But occasionally you get those jobs where you get to the point where you say, I don’t think this is a good fit anymore.”
— Erin Gates (29:35)

12. Rebuilding Morale After a Creative Blow (30:35 – 33:07)

• Gather all parties for a frank, solutions-oriented meeting.
• There’s one chance to get back on track; repeated disruptions are a sign to end the relationship to preserve team morale and creative energy.

13. Contract Language & Expectations (33:07 – 34:58)

• Walk clients through contracts and expectations, including attendance for key meetings.
• Even children’s input may be included for family projects.

Notable Quotes

• “You can’t strong arm people into meetings... So while you can put it in your contract, that's not how the real world works.”
  — Erin Gates (17:17)

• “We really get invested... so when this happens, it's pretty devastating. But you have to just look at it as an opportunity to earn more hourly billable hours.”
  — Erin Gates (19:35)

• “Sometimes you have to cut your losses... and move on to a different opportunity and let them find a different designer.”
  — Erin Gates (32:43)

Closing: Best Career Advice from Erin Gates (35:09 – 36:04)

Quote:

“Just go out and try. Because you don't want to look back on your life and say, shoot, I should have tried that, even though it was scary.”
— Erin Gates (35:16)

Erin attributes her drive and courage to pursue design and run her own business to this advice from her late father.

Key Takeaways

• Contracts help—but don’t guarantee compliance. Use them to set expectations, but stay flexible and pragmatic.
• Hourly billing protects you from costly disruptions. Clearly define the scope in any flat fee arrangement.
• Assess all stakeholders early, and check in often. Direct questions and ongoing transparency help prevent late-stage upheaval.
• Paper trails are your friend. Copy everyone, document decisions.
• Morale matters. A single disruption can be salvaged with openness and communication; repeated disruptions are grounds to walk away.
• Direct communication saves time and energy. Be candid about costs, timelines, and what will or won’t be redone.
• Creative and professional self-care is crucial. Sometimes, the best decision is to let go and move on to new, more compatible clients.

For more practical advice and candid business stories, listen to Trade Tales from Business of Home.