Podcast Summary: Translating ADHD

Episode: Coming Into Sight: Identity, Transition, and ADHD

Hosts: Asher Collins & Dusty Chipura
Date: September 8, 2025

Overview

In this episode, Asher and Dusty begin a new season by focusing on Asher’s experience of gender transition and its intersection with ADHD. The episode explores the liminal space of transition, the evolution of self-identity, and how both ADHD and being trans impact concepts of self, authenticity, and change. Both hosts share personal insights and discuss the parallels between neurodivergence and gender identity, emphasizing the importance of self-knowledge and choice in navigating life’s transitions.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Season Structure and Episode Focus

• Asher introduces a season revisiting popular ADHD concepts, but notes the first three episodes, starting with this one, will focus more on personal journey and transness.
• Dusty chose to revisit Asher's “coming out” episode during the show’s summer break, prompting deeper reflection on Asher’s transition journey.
  • “I was looking for the episodes that really stood out in some way in terms of meaning or content, and I just thought that was a very meaningful episode.” — Dusty (01:59)

2. The Liminal Space of Transition

• Asher attempts to describe the transition experience, calling it “liminal”—a state of being between the past and present.
• Compared the process to a second puberty, but “without the option to hide away,” instead living and working in public while grappling with identity.
  • “It’s kind of like the cocoon stage of being a butterfly, except for I don’t… I didn’t get to hide away.” — Asher (05:16)
• There’s a “sobering reality” upon coming out: every relationship, even positive ones, becomes conditional or must be renegotiated.
  • “Every relationship that you have is conditional. Every single one… Even your great relationships get thrown into this brand new weird place.” — Asher (06:02)

3. The Parallels Between Coaching, Transition, and ADHD

• Asher describes how professional growth as a coach parallels personal growth through transition.
• A coach’s development moves from a place of fear and uncertainty to confidence through curiosity, reflection, and detachment from outcome.
• Asher lost some of this self-assuredness during transition, as everything about identity and ADHD became “mushy,” challenging even his expert self-concept.
• Key realization: not everything challenging in his life was ADHD—issues like dissociation or sensory discomfort with clothing sometimes related more to gender than neurodivergence.

4. Revisiting and Updating the “Coming Out” Narrative

• Dusty asks how Asher’s understanding of his trans identity has evolved.
• Asher notes: while the external context changed (closer friends, a queer chosen family), his core self is much the same—but the process to reach this stability was “brutal.”
• Navigated experiences of being misgendered or “clocked” (recognized as trans), and reached a place of agency about which aspects of identity to present.
  • “So much of this process is getting far enough through the liminal space to reorient to who you are so that you can meaningfully be at choice about what matters to you or doesn’t matter to you.” — Asher (18:36)

5. The Importance of Individualized Experience

• Dusty emphasizes that every trans person’s journey is unique, just as every ADHD journey is different.
  • “You’ve met one trans person, you’ve met one trans person… there aren’t any rules in particular.” — Dusty (20:44)
• Asher underlines how his coaching expertise in identity and purpose for ADHD clients parallels the self-discovery process in transition.
• Self-knowledge enables clearer decision-making, acceptance of difference, and resilience against misunderstanding or marginalization.

6. “Now I Can Finally See Myself” — Arriving at a New Place

• Asher shares the shift from needing external validation to having clear internal understanding and agency.
• Practical example: dressing intentionally, knowing what to show or not show the world based on comfort, safety, and authenticity.
• Story of attending a Billy Strings concert highlights transition from “coding” oneself to avoid discomfort, to standing in authenticity—while also navigating new feelings when fully “passing” as male.
  • “It was almost like the end of a grief cycle… I’ve stepped into a more actualized version of myself.” — Asher (30:09)
• Realization: community and values evolve as the self becomes clearer and more fully expressed.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On describing transition:
  “Transition… it’s kind of like the cocoon stage of being a butterfly, except for I don’t… I didn’t get to hide away.” — Asher (05:16)
• On every relationship being conditional:
  “There’s this really sobering reality when you come out that every relationship that you have is conditional. Every single one.” — Asher (06:02)
• On learning about self beyond ADHD:
  “I’m discovering brand new masks that have absolutely nothing to do with having ADHD… disassociation… sensory issues with clothing… gendered behavior…” — Asher (12:43)
• On individuality of trans and ADHD experiences:
  “You’ve met one person with ADHD, you’ve met one person with ADHD. I think that… is really hard for cisgender people to recognize about trans folk is like, you’ve met one trans person, you’ve met one trans person.” — Dusty (20:44)
• On ending the journey of fitting in:
  “It was almost like the end of a grief cycle… That’s because I’ve stepped into a more actualized version of myself.” — Asher (30:09)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:04 – Season introduction and rationale for revisiting Asher’s coming out episode
• 04:00 – What is transition? The liminal space described
• 06:00 – Relationships and conditionality post-coming out
• 09:00 – Coaching process and creative frustration during transition
• 12:40 – ADHD vs. gender-related challenges (masks, sensory issues, dissociation)
• 14:45 – Dusty asks about how identity has evolved; Asher discusses the slow, “brutal” change
• 17:20 – Being clocked, voice choices, and the need for agency
• 18:30 – Transition as a process of coming to meaningful choice
• 20:44 – Dusty: No single narrative for being trans or having ADHD
• 21:49 – Parallels between ADHD and trans experience; self-knowledge as foundational skill
• 23:35 – “I can finally see myself”: Internal validation and new comfort in being
• 26:50 – Billy Strings concert story, passing, grief, and self-actualization
• 30:09 – Coming to terms with evolution—communities, values, and the self

Takeaways

• Transition and deep change are rarely neat or linear; they are processes that involve moving through difficult, “liminal” spaces.
• Self-knowledge—knowing who you are at your core—makes living with difference, whether ADHD or gender, more sustainable and authentic.
• Everyone’s journey (as a trans person, or with ADHD) is unique; generalizations don’t serve.
• Agency and being at choice—about name, voice, presentation—are hard-won gifts of deep transitions.
• Support, reflection, and community (found and chosen) matter, but ultimately, clarity must come from within.