Atsuko Okatsuka is Good Cop & Katherine Blanford is Bad Cop

Summary

Trash Tuesday Episode: "Atsuko Okatsuka is Good Cop & Katherine Blanford is Bad Cop" Release Date: June 10, 2025

In this engaging episode of Trash Tuesday, hosts Esther Povitsky and Khalyla Kuhn delve into a variety of relatable and humorous topics with their guests, Atsuko Okatsuka and Katherine Blanford. The episode balances comedic anecdotes with insightful discussions, offering listeners a blend of laughter and thoughtful conversation.

1. Cultural Differences in Hospitality and Social Norms

The conversation kicks off with a lighthearted debate between Atsuko and Katherine about Southern hospitality versus Asian cultural practices. They explore how different cultures approach social interactions, particularly in the context of splitting bills at restaurants.

• Esther Povitsky reflects on her experience moving to LA:

  "At first, I was kind of taken back by people that were like, we'll be splitting the check or, like, you'll have yours or whatever else. And then after a while, I was like, wow, that's so cool that you can say that and not feel guilty for the rest of the year." (08:18)

• Atsuko Okatsuka adds:

  "We Asians are fighting now." (09:01)

The hosts discuss the sense of community and responsibility inherent in different cultural settings, emphasizing the balance between generosity and personal boundaries.

2. Parenthood, Pet Ownership, and Life Choices

A significant portion of the discussion centers around parenthood versus pet ownership. Atsuko shares her perspective on choosing dogs over children, highlighting the deep bond and unconditional love pets provide.

• Atsuko Okatsuka states:

  "I love my dogs way more. And seeing them interact and seeing how they are with my baby makes me love them exponentially more." (03:02)

• Katherine Blanford humorously contrasts her dog's behavior:

  "My dog wants to kill my daughter." (03:18)

The conversation shifts to the emotional impact of losing a pet and the challenges of balancing personal life with pet care, offering listeners heartfelt insights into making life choices that align with personal happiness.

3. Navigating the Dating Scene and Modern Relationships

The hosts and guests delve into the nuances of modern dating, particularly the challenges posed by dating apps. They discuss the superficial nature of app-based interactions versus organic, in-person connections.

• Esther Povitsky expresses her reluctance:

  "I just feel like I gotta have to meet somebody organically because I am like this and I'll blow my nose at dinner." (34:16)

• Atsuko Okatsuka shares her experience with role-playing in relationships:

  "We were always competing to find the new one." (54:04)

The dialogue highlights the importance of authenticity and emotional connection, critiquing the rigidity and superficiality often associated with online dating profiles.

4. Personal Anecdotes and Comedic Insights

Throughout the episode, the hosts and guests share a series of personal stories and comedic observations, ranging from dog behaviors to awkward social interactions.

• Katherine Blanford recounts a humorous incident:

  "He walks up next to me and says, 'You're too pretty to be in a wheelchair.'" (50:28)

• Annie Lederman adds her own twist:

  "I was holding Charlotte and realized I was holding a six-year-old, not a baby. That's my lifeline." (23:02)

These anecdotes serve to highlight the relatability of everyday situations, blending humor with genuine experiences.

5. The Role of Therapy and Mental Health

Midway through the episode, there is a brief interruption for a sponsored segment by BetterHelp, where Annie emphasizes the importance of mental health and seeking professional support.

• Annie Lederman urges listeners:

  "You need that outsider. And that's why we love BetterHelp." (31:43)

This segment underscores the podcast's commitment to addressing serious topics alongside its comedic content.

6. Exploring Gender Dynamics and Personal Boundaries

Towards the end, the conversation shifts to gender dynamics, personal boundaries, and physical interactions. The hosts discuss comfort levels with touch and the impact of societal norms on personal behavior.

• Esther Povitsky shares her struggles:

  "I'm touchy. I realize now, I don't know, it's a hard thing to break." (57:33)

• Katherine Blanford adds:

  "Sometimes funny things happen by accident." (65:42)

These discussions offer insights into personal growth and the complexities of maintaining relationships while respecting individual boundaries.

Notable Quotes

• Esther Povitsky on cultural generosity:

  "It's so cool that you can say that and not feel guilty for the rest of the year." (08:18)

• Atsuko Okatsuka on love for pets:

  "I love my dogs way more." (03:02)

• Annie Lederman on seeking therapy:

  "You need that outsider." (31:43)

• Katherine Blanford on maintaining boundaries:

  "Sometimes funny things happen by accident." (65:42)

Conclusion

This episode of Trash Tuesday masterfully blends humor with heartfelt discussions, offering listeners a multifaceted look into cultural differences, personal relationships, and the importance of mental health. Through relatable anecdotes and witty banter, Esther, Khalyla, Atsuko, and Katherine create an engaging and thoughtful conversation that resonates with a diverse audience.

For more insights and laughter, tune in every Tuesday and join the community of S.L.U.G.S (Sexy Little Ugly Girls) as they continue to unload their trauma, intrusive thoughts, and wild takes for all the sluggies out there to love, hate, or relate.

Follow Trash Tuesday:

• Instagram: @itstrashtuesday
• TikTok: @itstrashtuesday
• YouTube: Hit Our Buttons

Hosts:

• Khalyla Kuhn: @khalamityk
• Esther Povitsky: @esthermonster

Transcript

[Esther Povitsky]

Are there other people coming?

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah. That's so sad.

[Esther Povitsky]

What?

[Annie Lederman]

Like you just got to my party. Are there other people coming?

[Esther Povitsky]

Italy has got it. I know, I shouldn't have asked it like that.

[Annie Lederman]

I should have been like, I love how you.

[Esther Povitsky]

I love extra seating.

[Annie Lederman]

I love how it's just us. I love that. I was like, oh, I love how.

[Esther Povitsky]

You have so much extra equipment, how prepared just in case.

[Annie Lederman]

Okay. Hi, slugs. Hey, it's your girl with a mouthful of raisins and walnuts here to tell you I have a stand up show in LA, Friday, June 27th at the Comedy Store. You can get tickets at the link below. I'll see you there. It's. It's been real. Well, we have a Patreon and it is, I'll say it, it's popping off.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And it's juicy, juicy, juicy.

[Annie Lederman]

And we have full episodes there. We're talking current events, pop culture, all the stuff we don't get to on the full episodes. And our Patreon is growing and we love our patron slugs, you guys, and join and get instant access to all the backlogged episodes. So if you want to have like a little binge and then a new thing every week, you can go to patreon.com trashtuesdaypodcast or click the link below and shout out to our golden slugs, Brandon and Thomas.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And if you're a hater, we also have a hater tier. Oh, yeah, just for you.

[Esther Povitsky]

This is your line.

[Annie Lederman]

Isn't that so, like, impressive?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I'm such a slob. It's like weird, but I got it done.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, you have beautiful hair. This is all purchased. This is amazing. This is not mine at all.

[Annie Lederman]

Wait, really? It looks so good.

[Esther Povitsky]

I still go back to Atlanta to get my extensions fixed. So I fly back to Atlanta on a red eye on Thursday, go straight to the chair, sit in the chair for seven hours, then fly back out that night.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, do you have the kind that don't come out?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, you do.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You have, you have the clip ins.

[Esther Povitsky]

I have two wefts. You can see. Actually they're kind of grown out. So that's what I'm going back on there. You see how it's so nice?

[Annie Lederman]

Yes. I've always felt that if I were to do extensions, it's gotta be like that.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Because I don't want to clip in and clip out every day.

[Esther Povitsky]

I would never.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I'm the opposite. I'm so claustrophobic that anything on me is not a part of me. I start to like, breathe heavy.

[Esther Povitsky]

Do you wear makeup?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, sometimes. Well, I haven't lately. This is. Might be the first day I'm wearing makeup.

[Annie Lederman]

So do you wear makeup?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

But that's another thing. I feel claustrophobic in makeup.

[Annie Lederman]

When she first got here, she was like, so is anyone else coming? It's like when you get to a party and I'm just sitting there, I'm.

[Esther Povitsky]

Like, yeah, well, I just. I thought it was okay, that if no one was just okay. But I was like, maybe they're set up for a podcast after this. And there's four chances.

[Annie Lederman]

What's going on with Remy that he needs to come to work now I'm.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Fully realizing he probably doesn't have a whole lot of time left, so I don't want to be away from him for a single minute.

[Esther Povitsky]

Baby, I know. It's so. It's. I know you guys have children now, but I feel like losing a dog has gotta be earth shattering. It's your first baby.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I wanna be clear that when people are like, I love my dog less after I had the kid is not true.

[Annie Lederman]

No, I know.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I love my dogs way more. And seeing them interact and seeing how they are with my baby makes me love them exponentially more.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, are you bragging? Cause you know that my dog wants to kill my daughter.

[Esther Povitsky]

But your dog's mad at your daughter.

[Annie Lederman]

Do you know Catherine?

[Esther Povitsky]

Hi, Catherine. We were behind each other in a CVS pharmacy line recently, but I didn't say anything to you.

[Annie Lederman]

That's such a weird way to start this.

[Esther Povitsky]

What?

[Annie Lederman]

That's a really weird way. You're anti mother. Yeah, talk. Talk to me.

[Esther Povitsky]

For real, Sella. Of course.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, do we start?

[Annie Lederman]

Well, sure.

[Katherine Blamford]

I'm all.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Can you do a proper intro? Yeah, I can intro. Atsuko.

[Katherine Blamford]

Am I buttoned up?

[Annie Lederman]

Yes. We'll do as versus whites.

[Esther Povitsky]

We've already decided.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, yeah. This. Race war.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Race war, Race war.

[Annie Lederman]

You know, we're screwed.

[Esther Povitsky]

So, yeah, it's the end of our time. This is the beginning.

[Katherine Blamford]

Well, it's. It's our month, right? It's Asian month, but it's also Jewish month.

[Annie Lederman]

Is it? We get a month.

[Katherine Blamford]

Hey, that's what I said.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You aren't supposed to know your month.

[Katherine Blamford]

We share it. We share it. Not. Not about you, but I'm just like. Apparently we share it.

[Annie Lederman]

I do think Jewish people and Asian people are very similar, but I don't tend to get a lot of support on that theory when I share it.

[Katherine Blamford]

No.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No pressures. You are absol. Absolutely right.

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Two of My best friends wanted to start a website. One is Jewish, one is Korean, and literally the site is called jewsincorean.com.

[Annie Lederman]

I'M. I want to be a subscriber.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

If they take them, there is something. You're really onto something, and I think you're. You're correct about that.

[Esther Povitsky]

You have both your family dynamics, your. Your parents want you guys to do.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Well, depends what kind of Asian.

[Katherine Blamford]

Depends on what kind of Asians. I know what it is. Korean. Because jewsincorean.com.

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah, yeah, right. I think it's just that we're both cheap.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, you know what? But who isn't too, though? You know, the more I learn about just, like, every kinds of people, I'm like, wait, we're all truly the same.

[Annie Lederman]

I feel like her kinds is not cheap.

[Katherine Blamford]

What is your kind?

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah, I agree with you, southern white.

[Katherine Blamford]

Well, it's because this is making me want to fight my earrings. When I'm taking. When I'm taking earrings off, I'm like, huh?

[Esther Povitsky]

We're gonna hide.

[Katherine Blamford]

Huh? What'd you say?

[Annie Lederman]

I bet you're so generous. Like, I bet you would, like, pick up any tab, even if it's like, you really shouldn't.

[Esther Povitsky]

Oh, 100%. I moved out to LA and, like, how many people weren't doing the dance that I was used to being like, I got it. No, I got it. No, I've got it. No, I don't even need anything. No, I've got it. I just showed up to pay the tab. Like, when people don't do that here and people have, like, agency and boundaries, I'm like, you fucking bitch.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I fully agree with that.

[Katherine Blamford]

Asians do that. I get it.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes. So in our. I can't say our because I'm not Japanese, but in Filipino culture, us.

[Katherine Blamford]

We can be us. Us. My kindred spirits are the Filipino people.

[Stella]

Thank you.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You are an honorary Filipino. It is a game you play with the check. Everyone fights for it. And even if you don't plan on paying, you better still pretend you're fighting for it.

[Esther Povitsky]

I said do the dance. Yeah, the dance is I lead, but you will dip me eventually, you know, which means, like, you pay the check eventually. We all know you're gonna pay the check. But, like, it's rude of me not to play the dance. I even on dates sometimes. The guy dated in Georgia before I left him and moved to L. A. On our first date, I literally go, okay, is this where I pretend to go go get my credit card?

[Annie Lederman]

How did he react to that?

[Esther Povitsky]

I think he was scared of me from the get go. Z. Nervous.

[Annie Lederman]

Laughed, but, like, he nervous laugh.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, like.

[Katherine Blamford]

But this was in the south, where you're saying they do do that. Like, they do pick up the check.

[Esther Povitsky]

It's all they do. Everyone's a dance. Everyone's hospitable.

[Katherine Blamford]

Except for that guy.

[Esther Povitsky]

He paid for it.

[Katherine Blamford]

O. He paid for it.

[Annie Lederman]

But he was nervous by you on the first date, and then you guys became boyfriend and girlfriend.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. How did you work that? Kind of like a friendly prison situation for him. I feel like he was just like, this woman is terrifying and aggressive, but I'll probably never get, like, any. Get in with anyone like her ever again.

[Annie Lederman]

You mean as pretty as her? Say it. I'll say it.

[Esther Povitsky]

Listen, you can say, like, Southern people are like, we take value in being hosts and, like, wanting to, like, show. Never put anybody out. Which, like, sometimes it's. It's to your detriment. We certainly don't know what boundaries are.

[Annie Lederman]

That's kind of Filipino Y, right?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. Filipinos is like, everything is potluck. But also, everyone brings Tupperware. It's called bring house. You have to be a equal member in bringing stuff to the party. You always have. You cannot come with empty hands. But everyone leaves with a Tupperware.

[Annie Lederman]

What if I bring a smile?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Oh, really?

[Esther Povitsky]

Wait, do you.

[Katherine Blamford]

I'm like, hey, whatever. I'm a little like, California meets Asia, you know? I'm like, hey, you are enough. You did. You. You came, and that's all that matters.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, my God.

[Katherine Blamford]

Do you know how hard it was to even get up? You know what I mean?

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Well, so you're saying you don't feel the hospitality anymore after having moved to la?

[Esther Povitsky]

At first, I was. Was kind of taken back by people that were like, we'll be splitting the check or, like, you'll have yours or whatever else. And then. And then after a while, I was, like, impressed by it. I was like, wow, that's so cool that you can say that and not feel guilty for the rest of the year.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I completely agree. I think it's so awkward to have to split the check between six people. If I'm in that situation, forget it. It's like, here, take my credit card. We'll figure it out later. Because this is so fucking embarrassing what we're doing.

[Esther Povitsky]

I'll go into debt. I'll go into debt. Sit in the situation.

[Annie Lederman]

It's just like a split even. Or do you mean if it's like an even split?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I don't feel Comfortable. It is so weird for me.

[Katherine Blamford]

No, yeah. Wait, but okay, where Asian la are?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

We Asians are fighting now.

[Katherine Blamford]

No, no, I. You know what? It is too. Also, LA doesn't. Because if you moved here, most people are transplants. And if you're in the industry. So I wouldn't say this culture is like a. Almost like a third culture. It's like a made up culture too.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

So it's. It's hard to decipher what's going on.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Hodgepodge.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, yeah. It's a hodgepodge of everyone in this economy in these tariffs and these tariffs, these $400 tariffs. We're paying for pants that look like. It didn't have to be that expensive. You know what I mean? I was like, damn, they do. They look incredible.

[Annie Lederman]

You always look cool.

[Katherine Blamford]

I could have gone to, I don't know, Marshalls.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I went to Marshalls yesterday. Those pants were not there.

[Katherine Blamford]

Worth the 400 terror.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Katherine Blamford]

Worth the 400.

[Esther Povitsky]

Can we. For your nails, too.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh. Oh, thank you. They're just hot dogs. Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

No, they're not.

[Katherine Blamford]

Just one is a hot dog and condiments.

[Annie Lederman]

That's so Chicago of you.

[Katherine Blamford]

Thank you. Oh, yes. It's for the Pope. This is. This is me celebrating the Pope and America, you know, because. Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

New pope, new nails.

[Katherine Blamford]

You got to show your patriotism.

[Annie Lederman]

Will you introduce.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You can introduce your white friend. I'll introduce Asian.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, right. Oh, right. We still haven't started.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, we're starting three.

[Katherine Blamford]

Three beginnings.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No, no, this is all you guys. It's an special show. We have back my honorary Filipina, Atsuko Okatsuka.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yay.

[Annie Lederman]

Hilarious comedian. And we have another hilarious comedian. And she's white and she's blonde and she's so funny. And this is our third attempt at getting her here. And finally, we drugged her. We dragged her. Katherine Blamford.

[Esther Povitsky]

Thank you, guys. I'm rare. I'm nervous what's gonna happen on this.

[Katherine Blamford]

Podcast because it started with the Asians and the whites.

[Esther Povitsky]

That. And because it. It was so many failed attempts. Like, I feel like. Like there's might be an earthquake during the podcast or something.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Well, it is earthquake season.

[Katherine Blamford]

It is la.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Why would you say that?

[Esther Povitsky]

Why would you.

[Annie Lederman]

Yes. And her earthquake manifestation.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I always. Yes. And earthquakes.

[Katherine Blamford]

It's also full moon.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, it's full moon.

[Katherine Blamford]

Full moon. So people be wild out there in the streets. And did you see the way people are driving already? It started.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Tariffs. Full moon. Chicago Pope 2025. Earthquakes. Right around the corner, babe.

[Esther Povitsky]

Lord, I don't want to die from natural disaster.

[Annie Lederman]

Why?

[Esther Povitsky]

Because I don't want to be in the Lump of Statistics. 26 people died today because of earthquake. You want to be one woman died because of manhole.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, so as long as you're the only one.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, I want to be the one person that dies. And then everyone talks about that story. But I don't want to be one of 42.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Well, I'll tell you what's my biggest fear is being in a plane crash with someone really famous because no one will talk about you and your life. Your picture is not going to be posted what you did for a living. It's going to be that celebrity who died.

[Katherine Blamford]

You know that airplane that had to reroute and like, stop in emergency stop in Japan from the Philippines back to la. Jo Koy was on that flight.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I saw that.

[Katherine Blamford]

Okay. And so I was out eating and I heard two people talking about it. Right. And they were like, yes. Yeah, we had to reroute and there was this person coming from the Philippines back to la and they were like, it was so wild. And the Jo Koy was on our flight. And I. I was like, what? And then. So because of Joe is how I think more people found the joke about it.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

I mean, obviously it's a scary thing. So internationally, everyone's talking about it, but she had this experience where. Cause I was like, oh, I'm so curious. How was the experience? I haven't talked to Joe about it. I know Joe, but. And she was like, oh, we. We had to sit on the tarmac for hours once we landed in Japan. But Joe. Joe got to get off.

[Annie Lederman]

What?

[Katherine Blamford]

He got to get off because, you know, there's visa issues. Philippines, like, you can't just walk, get into. Japan's pretty strict with visa stuff. Joe is an American citizen, so he was like, also, you know, first class. Also Jokoi. So they're like, come on in, sir. Come in, sir. Yeah, I think so.

[Annie Lederman]

Wait, I just came up with a perfect way for you to die. You want to be in a plane crash?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

But everyone else survives but you.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, then the guilt. Oh, my gosh. The guilt you would feel.

[Annie Lederman]

No, that everyone else would feel.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wait.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, she's dead.

[Katherine Blamford]

I. I'm hearing things wrong. Okay, okay.

[Esther Povitsky]

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Katherine Blamford]

You're dead. Everyone else lives.

[Esther Povitsky]

Can I die saving a little boy? Like, his seatbelt wrecked and so I threw my body on top? I don't know.

[Annie Lederman]

Can you?

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow.

[Annie Lederman]

Show us what you got.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You're very anti child, so I Don't foresee you saving child.

[Esther Povitsky]

Dog.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Dog.

[Esther Povitsky]

Dog isn't strapped in.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, you would be such a. I jumped.

[Esther Povitsky]

Save dog.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

My head snaps, hits the ceiling of the airplane, come down dead. Dog. Dog ends up dying anyways. I think a year later, they would.

[Annie Lederman]

Name an airport after you.

[Esther Povitsky]

Thank you. I hope it's a really shitty one, like Fargo.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Can I just.

[Esther Povitsky]

Shitty.

[Katherine Blamford]

Can I try to save what I said, even though it didn't make sense, but make it make sense?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

The way the world is going, the guilt you would feel. What, for dying and we have to continue living on this earth?

[Esther Povitsky]

I think so.

[Katherine Blamford]

That's what I meant.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, that's fucking funny.

[Katherine Blamford]

No, I'm just twisting it so that it looked like I listened. Yeah. I must have missed it. I was like, how did I miss the fact that she's the one that died?

[Annie Lederman]

She has victim's guilt for victim's remorse.

[Katherine Blamford]

For leaving this shitty earth.

[Esther Povitsky]

And I go, enjoy Covid 2.0.

[Katherine Blamford]

Right, right. And you saved that dog.

[Esther Povitsky]

And I saved that dog. My mom died right before COVID Well, sooner than that. But I think about. I'm like, she really got out at the prime time.

[Katherine Blamford]

I mean, you know, in a way. Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

Right before COVID like, that was prime. It was. All the 90s were great.

[Annie Lederman]

It really is.

[Esther Povitsky]

2000S were great. The 2010s pretty fantastic. The teens were pretty good. She got out before Trump. 1.0.

[Katherine Blamford]

1.0. And, yeah, she experienced Obama, like.

[Esther Povitsky]

And she had Bush. And I know people are mad about George W. Bush, but I always say this. I was young when Bush was president, and I just thought he was cute. I thought he was adorable.

[Annie Lederman]

I think we all had a little bit of a crush on him at one point.

[Esther Povitsky]

Is that okay?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I don't know if it's crush. It's more like a. Yeah, right.

[Annie Lederman]

He was still, for a president, he's cute. He's definitely cuter than everything.

[Katherine Blamford]

Like, the face.

[Esther Povitsky]

There's a gif of him shaking his booty.

[Annie Lederman]

Cuter than Bill Clinton.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. And he was a cheerleader, actually. A former cheerleader.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Was he really?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. I know this because I was a former cheerleader. And in my new. In my show, I talked about, like, you know, some US Presidents were cheerleaders in the past. George W. Is one of four.

[Esther Povitsky]

Really? Yes, he was.

[Annie Lederman]

We really forget about him.

[Katherine Blamford]

And he speaks Spanish. Oh, multiculti. You know what I mean? Speaks Spanish fluently.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Things are so grim that we're circling back around and loving.

[Katherine Blamford]

I know we're like, he spoke.

[Esther Povitsky]

This was fine. This was okay. Absolutely.

[Annie Lederman]

We weren't PewDiePie, but we had it.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. He was like, right?

[Katherine Blamford]

He, like, started a war, and he was like, look over here. And we were like, oh, my God. Yes.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And doesn't he paint now?

[Katherine Blamford]

And he paints. Yeah, he paints.

[Esther Povitsky]

And his daughters are on, like, Good Morning America. Oh, yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

This is.

[Esther Povitsky]

Oh, it's really not that bad if you think about it now.

[Annie Lederman]

Exactly.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Wait, so, Catherine, what's up with your anti mother? Yeah, say more.

[Katherine Blamford]

Well, anti mother or anti child?

[Esther Povitsky]

Mm, anti mother.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow. Wow. Okay. Yeah, really?

[Annie Lederman]

This is really bad for the white side.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Okay. Anti mother. Okay. Oh, yeah, you do anti mother. We'll do the anti child thing or something. I don't know. Is this a debate now?

[Esther Povitsky]

It really is. No, I think you're a good girl.

[Katherine Blamford]

I'll do anti child, you do anti mother.

[Esther Povitsky]

So I was anti child for so long. Cause I nannied for eight years. I started comedy in Atlanta. I nannied during the day. It was great family. The parents were great. But I realized the old way of thinking was like, we'll just have a kid and figure it out.

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

If you have a child, you have to have the time to dedicate to raising the child.

[Annie Lederman]

That's definitely a fair assessment.

[Esther Povitsky]

We can no longer have the. I'm gonna just call it a boomer mindset of being like, well, we got the kid. You know what? It'll fit into our lives. No, you're raising a shitty person. That's not gonna benefit the world. If you have a kid, I feel like you've got to have the time to mold it and shape it. And when it cries or whatever, you don't go, well, you figure it out. You sit down and you go, why are we crying? Do we have feelings? Let's talk about feelings. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And so I just feel like maybe nowadays, maybe one's okay and maybe not everybody even has to have one. Totally. Maybe the population is big enough. We should all slow down. Maybe instead of a child, four dogs and no crates, by the way. But, like, let's stop acting like. No, you don't like crates. You like crates.

[Katherine Blamford]

Crates for dog. Crates for dog. Crates, Yeah.

[Stella]

I think crates for dogs are okay. Makes them feel safe.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Crate training.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Okay. Oh, she's anti dog, too. Anti crates.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

Okay. Anti crates. My mother.

[Esther Povitsky]

I just feel we all just assume that motherhood is the first option, and then we scale back from there. I think a society right now, we all start with no Kids. And then some people decide after that the second option should be kids.

[Annie Lederman]

I think I'm like, more that latter option. And I wonder if maybe, like, you being from the south, it's like you're more like, accustomed to people just having kids and, like, I don't know so many kids.

[Esther Povitsky]

I have friends now on their third kid, and I'm like, live life.

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah, I get that. Because, like, look, I didn't do it till 36, so it's like, I think you're not being too anti mother. I think you're being, like, smart and pragmatic about, like, how you should look at having kids. I don't know. What do you guys think?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, I mean, well, I'm very childless and we're not gonna have kids. I don't know what very child this is. I'm so. I'm barren. I think I'm barren. I wouldn't be surprised.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No, that's literally my sister. She's very childless.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

She's very like, I will never. I can never. And she's so okay with it.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, right. My husband just had a vasectomy, you know, and. Yeah. Oh, they shave you for that. Did you know that? We didn't know.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, did he have to do. Sorry, it might be too tmi.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, no, no.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

But you know, you have to clear out the chamber. So he has to jerk off 50 times before you're in clear, huh?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. So after. After you do vasectomy. Yeah, they were like. They were like. So you're gonna have to. Yes. Jerk off 50 times. You know, make sure it's all out and then come back. Okay. Don't chew there. Come back before it's not empty or something like that. And don't you try having sex before it's 50 times. And they said. And please, for the love of God, don't try to do it all in one day. And my husband said, what did you say? Why'd you say that? And they said, you'd be surprised how many people try to do it all. Like, they were like, oh, shit. Like, their appointments coming up again to see the doctor. And so they're like, oh, I didn't do it. So they all try to do it. They try to get it, you know, procrastinating. So they try to do it all in one day. I think they die. I don't know what happens, but it would fall off.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

How much time is he given between his next appointment? How much time is he given to clear the chamber?

[Katherine Blamford]

It's a lot of time. It's months. Oh, it's been two. Yeah, whoever, like, just don't procrastinate. You have months to do it.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Right. So if we're going at the pace of one a day, yes, you'll be fine.

[Katherine Blamford]

But then some people are just like, ah, I'll get it. And it's like, shit, today's the day. I don't. I think you would die. I think this is why we've never heard of these people. Because they die. They're not in the news. Yeah. Vasectomy. Because we're so like, oh, let's not, you know, really have any children. Let's not risk it.

[Annie Lederman]

So is there a reason you made that decision or.

[Katherine Blamford]

We don't know what we're doing. We didn't know we weren't married till like six months ago. Right. Cause the paperwork thing, me and my husband. Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

What did you do?

[Katherine Blamford]

We forgot to turn in the paperwork.

[Esther Povitsky]

You're married by an Easy Bake Oven.

[Katherine Blamford]

We did a high five and we were like, I think we're married now. We put on. And we're like, yeah, now that's my husband. And no. Kind of. We don't know. We're not good at adulting. We're not good at adult stuff. Paperwork, these things that they don't teach you, you know? And so, yeah, there's no way. I went to my friend's baby's birthday party. I was holding my best friend's baby. Happy birthday. I was talking to her, everything for an hour. She comes in, she's busy, you know, hosting. She comes in, she goes, atsuko. I said, hey, Kelly. She's like, what are you doing? And I was like, I'm holding Charlotte. And she goes, that's not Charlotte I'm holding, not her baby. A whole hour. I was singing to her, talking to her, Charlotte, you're so beautiful. And I go, this isn't your baby. She goes, no. And I go, which one? Charlotte. She goes, this one. Charlotte is.

[Esther Povitsky]

No.

[Katherine Blamford]

She goes. Charlotte goes, hi, Atsuko. I'm like, you talk? She goes, yes. Charlotte is six years old, Otsuko. She goes, this a six year old? Walking, talking.

[Annie Lederman]

Was a six year old baby.

[Katherine Blamford]

I'm so sorry you had a baby. She goes, six years ago, Otsuko. Six years ago. I don't know what I'm doing. I cannot have my own baby.

[Esther Povitsky]

I agree.

[Katherine Blamford]

I don't even know what a baby looks like.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

This looks right, though.

[Katherine Blamford]

She said, come to Charlotte's birthday. I said, of course. Yes, for your baby. Because Baby could mean anything. She's like, y. It's my baby's birthday. I don't. I'm literally thinking, baby.

[Esther Povitsky]

I don't know what I'm doing. Legally, you can't have children now. It's safer for the world if you don't have children.

[Katherine Blamford]

I said, and who is this? Who is this baby?

[Annie Lederman]

We're all wondering also, what mother gave you their child?

[Katherine Blamford]

She said, my friend's dad was holding the baby. Oh. And. But that's like, my friend's neighbor's baby or something. You know, it's a lot of babies at a baby, like, a kid's birthday.

[Annie Lederman]

This is how much moms need help is. They'll just let you hold their baby unknown for, like, an hour. They just have no idea who you are.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, my God.

[Annie Lederman]

You don't know them.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. I said, who? And who is her mother?

[Esther Povitsky]

They were watching.

[Katherine Blamford]

Where is she?

[Esther Povitsky]

You were calling it Charlotte, and they were just like, see ya. That's my boy, Henry.

[Katherine Blamford]

I know. I had no idea. No idea. Cause the dad. Yeah. Cause I was like, oh, may I? And the dad's like, of course. And then he walked away. So I don't know.

[Esther Povitsky]

It wasn't the dad of your friend. It wasn't that.

[Katherine Blamford]

It is the dad of my friend.

[Esther Povitsky]

Okay.

[Katherine Blamford]

I just said, may I? May I, please? Oh, my God. And then. So he walked away. He doesn't hear me going, oh, Charlotte, little baby.

[Esther Povitsky]

Gosh. Wow.

[Katherine Blamford]

So what? Yes. Vasectomy.

[Esther Povitsky]

And when did you find out it was a baby doll and it wasn't?

[Katherine Blamford]

You're like, and when did you find out it was a terror. Your mix. It was a dog. It's wagging.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Are you still really into those real babies?

[Annie Lederman]

Me?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

The real dolls?

[Katherine Blamford]

You want to do that when you're an older. When you're older, Right?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

We talked about it the last time. Esther has dreams of when I'm, like.

[Annie Lederman]

A little crazy old lady. I want to, like, get, like, a very realistic baby doll and, like, push it in a stroller at the park and, like, pretend it's my real baby.

[Esther Povitsky]

Well, why don't you get a dog?

[Annie Lederman]

I'll have a dog.

[Esther Povitsky]

Is it something about the physicalness of, like, a plump, tiny body?

[Annie Lederman]

I think it's. No, no. It's like, how you feel like, as a mother, like you're caring for a little baby. Like, it's just fun. I never played with dolls when I was little, and now that I have a baby, I, I. It's something I like. So I want to, like, in the later years play pretend with dolls. If either of you are interested, I'll hold a spot for you. That bench is going to be real cold and empty.

[Esther Povitsky]

It is going to be empty for sure.

[Annie Lederman]

Room for more.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, right there. I'll be there. Because I would have never had a kid, so I'd be like, oh, sure, let's.

[Annie Lederman]

Let's do it now.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. You know, I'm good at holding things for an hour and being like, yes, yes, yes.

[Annie Lederman]

You actually sound like a very helpful person at a party. Someone who will just hold a random baby for an hour.

[Katherine Blamford]

I babysat too, so I, you know, I can do that pretty good. Yeah, I just wouldn't do it for myself, that's all. Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Do you feel like you're decided?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Really?

[Esther Povitsky]

I want to say it's not from. Didn't come from nothing like one family for eight years and they started with one kid. When I left, their third child was four. So like I raised. They raised their kids. But I was there every day with brand new babies helping them form into human beings. And so I know how much work it is and I love my life.

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

And I don't want to give my life.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Think about the work. It really is a lot of work. Sorry about his breath. Can you smell it?

[Annie Lederman]

It's really bad.

[Katherine Blamford]

Well, you're so close to him.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's really bad. I don't want to put him through surgery of getting his teeth removed because he's so old.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, no, I don't smell it at all. I bet.

[Stella]

Because attacks penises.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, no, that's Julio. Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

So there's a dog that attacks penises and so how's his breath? Because that one. That must. Because you're attacking with your mouth. That's the thing about dogs. It's like the mouth is your hands. Right. So when you're trying to fight, you're just.

[Esther Povitsky]

That's what dogs do.

[Katherine Blamford]

You doing? This is punching right? You with it.

[Esther Povitsky]

I didn't think about that.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Oh, yes. The saddest thing for me with dogs is that like when they're eating. No, when they're holding something, they have to hold with their mouth. Right. So they have to be like, do I eat or do I keep holding this?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, you're right.

[Katherine Blamford]

You have to this my hands. You know what I mean?

[Esther Povitsky]

I can't even think about that.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes, think about it. You got to. You have to think about these things.

[Esther Povitsky]

They'd be so frustrating if like. Cause dogs sit there and watch us use our hands and our thumbs. For things and they don't have them. Imagine if we were like, like pets to some other creature that had, like, limbs and stuff that we didn't have. Like, they could just float in the air and they feel like, so useless. Four more arms and I was. I'd be like, what a piece of I am.

[Annie Lederman]

But wouldn't that be so nice to have some big, strong octopus creature just like feeding you and petting you all day? Am I crazy?

[Esther Povitsky]

No.

[Katherine Blamford]

Because they could. They could feed you, they could feed themselves, they could feed your dogs. I'm gonna name five more things. They have eight, Right? Yeah. Anyway, so, yeah, they could be locking the. Keeping the door shut and feeding you, you know, from the intruders. This is a high stakes situation.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. Just always intruders.

[Katherine Blamford]

Always, always, always. Yeah. I mean, he can't floss and stuff, right?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

He can't. He's already gotten teeth removed. But if we get any more out, then his tongue will flop out completely.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, I love it when that happens.

[Katherine Blamford]

Which some dogs. Dogs do live like that.

[Esther Povitsky]

Do you think he would not like that? Or he'd be like, I think I'd.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Be sad about it. Like, oh, no.

[Annie Lederman]

How old is he?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

He's almost 15.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow.

[Annie Lederman]

Pepper's 15 too. We both have senior dogs.

[Esther Povitsky]

Your dog's 15 too?

[Annie Lederman]

Well, Pepper used to be my dog, but he lives with my parents now.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Did you never think to co parent with Pepper?

[Annie Lederman]

I tried.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Pepper with a boyfriend?

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah, Pepper and I, we. I had him with a boyfriend and then the boyfriend obviously broke up with me. He said he'd rather live. Live in his car than live with me or. No, he said he'd rather be homeless than live with me.

[Katherine Blamford]

And how is the streets for him?

[Annie Lederman]

He's doing good, actually.

[Stella]

Rich.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, he's rich now.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow. Okay.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

But sucks, right?

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah, no, I support it. So I gave Pepper to my parents because I was like doing open mics and it was very hard to be, you know, a dog mom when you're trying to make it in comedy, as I'm sure you guys have experienced. And then my dad was like, no, you can never have him back. Like, could I guess. Wait, no.

[Esther Povitsky]

But Pepper found.

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

People that love him no matter what.

[Katherine Blamford]

And you do too. You do love him too. I love this. Like, we're doing good. Good cop, bad cop. She's like, mothers suck. And I'm like, you know, you are enough. That's the only thing I come back to.

[Esther Povitsky]

I commend you for being mothers. I'm just saying. I think we should start Everybody's base should be not having kids.

[Katherine Blamford]

You're not wrong, by the way, girl. That is how we start when we come out into the earth.

[Esther Povitsky]

Not as a kid. In the south. They go, oh, you're a baby. Here's a doll for your crib. You're a mother in the crib. Get to work.

[Katherine Blamford]

It's the culture. Yeah, I think it's the culture that we can maybe not put so much pressure and have it not be so.

[Esther Povitsky]

Shameful, but stop doing Easy Bake Ovens and dolls. And one of the kids asked for a broom set for her birthday, and I was like, no, you're not getting a broom set. Here's a Hot Wheels car.

[Annie Lederman]

No, literally, for my daughter, instead of getting her, like, a little kitchen set, I'm gonna get her, like, a little bachelor pad.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Annie Lederman]

And, like, it'll just be like, a black leather couch and, like, a dirty towel. One dirty towel. Social. Navy sheets.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. Put a Scarface poster in her room.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Yeah. Cool. Because it's, like, also the religiousness of the south too. Right? Like, in the news, people are always like, childless women are selfish. You know, that kind of thing, that kind of mentality.

[Esther Povitsky]

They go, build our army instead.

[Katherine Blamford]

Right. It's like, you're living for you. That's selfish. Whatever that means. I never understood the selfishness of not having children. You're putting yourself first before this imaginary baby.

[Annie Lederman]

Right.

[Katherine Blamford]

You know, and it's like, well, the baby's not here, so I don't know how I'm putting myself before anyone. It's just me. Right? It's just me.

[Esther Povitsky]

Right.

[Annie Lederman]

There's no number two.

[Esther Povitsky]

There's no two to be neglecting with yourself.

[Katherine Blamford]

Right. I didn't have the baby, and I leave it.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Which would also be.

[Esther Povitsky]

You want to get deep with it, what it is.

[Annie Lederman]

You can leave your baby at the fire station. Someone will take it.

[Katherine Blamford]

People have done that in the past.

[Esther Povitsky]

Is that what they did back in the day? They just.

[Katherine Blamford]

Church steps. Yeah. It's a big thing. Right.

[Annie Lederman]

I know someone that their grandfather was found in a field.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, isn't that crazy?

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

Like a Tex Texas dog.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow.

[Annie Lederman]

This show is sponsored by Better Help. I actually feel so deeply bad for anyone that is trying to get through this life without therapy. And I'm speaking specifically to myself before I got a therapist because I was trying so hard. I did not know what was wrong with me, and I blamed myself. And I didn't know why I was felt so different than other people, why all the problems come to me. No, I needed therapy to work through that so that I could actually see that this is just the human experience. And I just needed some guidance and some help.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And sometimes you don't necessarily know what a heavy load you're carrying until you open up to a professional.

[Annie Lederman]

You need that outside perspective. And let me tell you, the people in your life are not it.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's time you stop white knuckling. Life.

[Annie Lederman]

Life.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's time you stop holding your breath.

[Annie Lederman]

You need that outsider. And that's why we love BetterHelp. We are so proud to be sponsored by them. As the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise. Talk it out with better help our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com TrashTuesday that's BetterHelp. H E L p.com TrashTuesday are you newly single?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

How's, how's it going?

[Esther Povitsky]

I'm trying to stay single right now. I'm like notorious for finding a stray dog, if you will, that needs homes.

[Annie Lederman]

I never heard of someone saying they're trying to stay single. You must be so pretty.

[Esther Povitsky]

No. Got out of a long term relationship and then kind of had a string of, you know, the situationships losers. But they were all. Yes, yes. They were boys. Boys. Not in a legal fashion, but boys. Now I'm just going like, I'm trying to be like trying to be happy with myself for a second to figure that out without having to like, I don't know, I feel uncomfortable being by myself, like spending too much time alone or going home alone and I'm trying to figure out how to be comfortable with that.

[Katherine Blamford]

You're resting right now?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like the chase. Instead I like to be like, hey.

[Annie Lederman]

Are you on dating apps?

[Esther Povitsky]

No, I'll never go on a dating app.

[Annie Lederman]

Really?

[Esther Povitsky]

Because I just feel like I gotta have to meet somebody organically because I am like this and I'll blow my nose at dinner.

[Stella]

Friends like this and how do you meet them? Asking for a friend.

[Esther Povitsky]

Well, again, none of them are great but I feel like if I'm meeting someone at a dating app that's a well established person that's looking for a well established person to match with them and I'm not gonna meet that needs of that person and I wanna be able to be myself.

[Annie Lederman]

You're not ready, huh? You're not ready to meet the right person yet.

[Esther Povitsky]

I don't feel like a dating app is the person I'm not gonna.

[Katherine Blamford]

Because it's very chiseled. You mean?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, That's a professional person.

[Katherine Blamford]

It's like, this is my list of things. That's me. And then these are my list of things. That's me.

[Esther Povitsky]

I don't like that.

[Katherine Blamford]

And so it's not as. Like, it's more rigid. Right. Instead of being like, hey, we're meeting at a bar. Yeah. I haven't dated in a long time. I haven't dated in a long time. So I don't know. That was my. That was how I picture.

[Esther Povitsky]

No very much.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, really?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. I don't wanna.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I don't wanna.

[Esther Povitsky]

I wanna like you because we have chemistry in a bar. We have chemistry during a plane crash or something like that. Like, there's a story. I don't wanna like you because I like your bio. Never have a bio. Never have a bio.

[Annie Lederman]

I have a friend who hired a coach to help her with her dating app profile, and she was telling me about it, and I'm like, I hate that. So they're with, like, your responses first. I'm like, I didn't even know there were words on profiles. Like, if you're a woman, words can only hurt you. Like, yes, you should just leave it all blank. Is that an object?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's always what I tell every single girl anytime. Because I'm on the are we dating the same guy? Pages on Facebook.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And I follow them like, it's, like, my religion. That's all I do. It's like, I know every single cheater in Honolulu. I know every single cheater in Nashville. Like, I know him by face.

[Annie Lederman]

Why Nashville?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Because I follow all the cities. Are we dating this?

[Esther Povitsky]

Are you okay?

[Katherine Blamford]

Do.

[Esther Povitsky]

Do you do Atlanta?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I do all of them. Show me a picture. I'll be like, girl, red flag.

[Katherine Blamford]

But Honolulu in Nashville was that high. She named them first. Wow.

[Esther Povitsky]

Hydration.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Honolulu, hiji. Lots of drama. Lots of island, you know? Yeah. Hawaii is small, so a lot of island drama.

[Katherine Blamford]

You've seen Moana?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Sometimes the girls will post their conversations with dudes. Right. Nothing angers me more than a girl over explaining, saying too much, leaving a paragraph. And I'm like, no, no, no. Like, you're doing too much. Like, the whole coaching thing. Words can only hurt you. Say less. I mean, the fact that they're. This is how I feel. And I don't like the way it's like, no, don't give him a paragraph or your time or effort or an essay. Like, his brain is so, like, just black and white. Give him nothing and then he will chase you to no end.

[Annie Lederman]

It's so hard because we want to be heard so bad.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I understand that, but there aren't of mature people. You can do all that in person in real life. But over text, over a dating app. Fuck that. Give them so little.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. It's so robotic now. It's not even real. Like, yeah. If you have to be like, do you like me? Cause I've spent a year curating my online PowerPoint presentation for you. That's how we figured out we liked each other.

[Katherine Blamford]

It's hard because humans aren't rigid. So we aren't just a paragraph.

[Esther Povitsky]

Know. Yes.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes.

[Esther Povitsky]

To put that in my bio.

[Annie Lederman]

I feel like I am a paragraph.

[Katherine Blamford]

One more time.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, you're not.

[Annie Lederman]

I'm a paragraph.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Let's write out your paragraph.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, let's do paragraph.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Let's do paragraphs.

[Katherine Blamford]

Come on. Paragraph.

[Annie Lederman]

I like dogs.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Okay.

[Annie Lederman]

And eating.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

And I'm short and I like to sit. I think that's all I need.

[Esther Povitsky]

You know what you are? You're an AIM Away message.

[Annie Lederman]

Thank you so much.

[Katherine Blamford]

Aim away message is. Oh, I thought I would explain for the younger listeners. Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Please do.

[Katherine Blamford]

Please do a O L instant messenger. And it was a place we chatted with a lot of strangers.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

A lot of strangers.

[Esther Povitsky]

There was a term called ASL, which was very dangerous.

[Annie Lederman]

Age, sex, location.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, yeah. And those of you today. It's also American Sign Language is what it also stands for. I've always wanted to be an interpreter of some generational interpreter. That's kind of what I was actually for my grandma and my mom.

[Esther Povitsky]

Mom, you know.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Yeah. Generational interpreter. Always had to be like. And she means hello.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. When she says hi.

[Katherine Blamford]

Hi. Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Or she goes to her room, doesn't want to engage with your friends.

[Annie Lederman]

She.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That means hello.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes. No, but that's a good paragraph, Esther. I'm into that.

[Annie Lederman]

Thank you.

[Katherine Blamford]

I said a lot too, actually.

[Annie Lederman]

Thank you. I feel seen Stella, our producer was saying that certain that on Raya.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

You have to pick a song.

[Stella]

One song.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You do.

[Esther Povitsky]

I hate this.

[Stella]

That's your entire personality.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I honestly. Crazy.

[Katherine Blamford]

Just the bio or that's like. Oh, that's kind of fun, too. It's gamified. Okay.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You guys want to know my song?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

What is yours so scared now?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Mine's actually pretty cool. Mine was a Krungbin song.

[Annie Lederman]

I don't know that.

[Katherine Blamford]

Who's Crumbin?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, my God, you'd love them.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Okay. Crumbin.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Just look at the vibe and it's. It's. It's Atsuko coded.

[Katherine Blamford]

Whoa. That's very. Yeah. I love.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Annie Lederman]

That is cool.

[Katherine Blamford]

So much.

[Annie Lederman]

Stella, what's your dating app song?

[Stella]

It's a theme song to Orson Welles old movie the Third man that came out in 19.

[Esther Povitsky]

Stella, wait.

[Katherine Blamford]

Can you hum it?

[Esther Povitsky]

Stella, can you hum it?

[Katherine Blamford]

So we have an idea.

[Esther Povitsky]

Stella, it's cool. I'm anti dating app, but I need you to work on yours.

[Annie Lederman]

Stella, mine would be Britney Spears toxic.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

Come on.

[Esther Povitsky]

You are not toxic at all.

[Annie Lederman]

I know, but that's like. It's fun.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Stella]

Now I'm thinking, like, no wonder I have so many loser.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Like.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Stella]

Fan people. Guys that are probably.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

But it was a deliberate choice to know. I think I feel like you knew exactly what you were doing before that.

[Stella]

I had put the Maple Tap Rag song.

[Esther Povitsky]

Stella.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh my God. The fact that, you know what do.

[Esther Povitsky]

You want to discuss dissertations or something? Maybe. What else?

[Katherine Blamford]

You got to be your true self.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, no, this is. If you're gonna play the game, play the game.

[Stella]

But if you play the game, you.

[Katherine Blamford]

Know, what's the game? What? How do you play this game?

[Esther Povitsky]

Well, I don't know.

[Katherine Blamford]

You put something cool on there that you never listen to. What?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Annie Lederman]

Yes.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, like we're gonna have to put. For you. I get. I don't know. At least put some Bon Iver on there or something there so that you.

[Katherine Blamford]

Can attract like the most emotional. Most who are like. I connect with him. Yes.

[Esther Povitsky]

It's better than I. It sounds like you're reading like a.

[Katherine Blamford]

But that's your interest.

[Esther Povitsky]

An essay.

[Annie Lederman]

What about like Frank Sinatra, New York.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Stella]

I just feel like that's kind of cheesy.

[Esther Povitsky]

I don't think.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I thought we were just supposed to put songs we personally like.

[Katherine Blamford]

Personally like.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Right. Not songs we think they might be interested in.

[Katherine Blamford]

Because that's antithesis.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's.

[Annie Lederman]

It's not Pick me. No, don't let her tell you that it's not pick me. It's faking your personality so a man will like you. And it has been done as years of oldest time.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I'm not against that.

[Katherine Blamford]

I'm not pretend to like what we are now. And look what has happened to us.

[Annie Lederman]

You're telling me you've never pretended to like Lord of the Rings, the White Socks, any kind of male.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No, I absolutely agree. When. When Bobby and I date first. We met on Tinder.

[Katherine Blamford]

Ew.

[Esther Povitsky]

Did you guys really?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes, we met on Tinder a long time ago. When Tinder like, was in its first month.

[Katherine Blamford]

There was pretending of liking things going on.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Well, he's very much like a cinephile and very, like, snobby about his music. I feel like I have really good taste in music. I've always, like, made playlists for my family and whatnot. But he is very like, ugh. Like, that's not. Not good stuff. It's four chords of the Apocalypse and he doesn't like pop songs. It's like, it's the same over and over because he plays instruments. Right. And very strategically, when I think on our third date, made a playlist that I knew would pique his interest, which is some Swedish death metal that I never listened to. Some, like, very obscure something something like Niels from, like, orchestral something. And I did what I did because I knew what I had to do, which was, oh, my God, Kalila is so cool. I really like this girl. And it worked, but it backfired because then he just started sending me.

[Katherine Blamford]

Now she's a. Now she's a Swedish metal.

[Esther Povitsky]

Did you like the stuff he was sending you?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No. But then he's like, oh, I gotta send you more stuff. And it's like, I don't want to listen to this. It's 10 years, years of me having him introduce to me stuff I don't really like.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

So it's like, okay, cool. He thought I was cool. But it's like, what's the end game?

[Katherine Blamford]

The key to life is knowing who you're not. It's very important.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes.

[Katherine Blamford]

Who cares? My profile. It will be the Moana theme song. Okay. Call me 12. Call me stupid. Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Moana theme song. By the way, I can't listen to it without crying. So if you. If I saw you on that app and you had a Moana theme song, I would like profess my love for you on the spot.

[Katherine Blamford]

Thank you so much. Boom. Found a match.

[Esther Povitsky]

Just like that. I like that you're looking for somebody that matches you intellectually, but are you interested in having sex? I am.

[Annie Lederman]

It is a little bit of a.

[Stella]

Game, though, because I'm like, I'm in la. Everybody thinks they're cool, so I'm gonna, like, one up them with, like, a really obscure thing that they probably don't know about. So that's why I. That is part of the game. But I also just think I. It's insane to describe your personality with one song.

[Esther Povitsky]

I get it. I get it.

[Stella]

And so that is what I do. But you're right, I should be trying. I just don't know anything about music. Really?

[Annie Lederman]

I think you're overthinking it because you cannot put your whole personality into one song. So you just gotta go rogue.

[Esther Povitsky]

But that's the crazy thing about the dating apps, by the way. Mine would be heads. Heads Will Roll by.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Is a legend.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, her haircut is so legendary.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, you get one of the last shows I went to before COVID was a Karen O and I like cried at her like entire set. She's such a legend.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

God love her.

[Katherine Blamford]

What.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

What were your MySpace songs? Remember that?

[Esther Povitsky]

Oh, my God.

[Annie Lederman]

Paparazzi Lady Gaga before it was released.

[Katherine Blamford]

Thank you. Wow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Is that how you got the follow from Lady Gaga? Because you were one of the OG fans?

[Annie Lederman]

No, that's not how actually.

[Esther Povitsky]

Excuse me.

[Katherine Blamford]

She was one of the friends.

[Annie Lederman]

No, no, no. I just was a very early Gaga freak. I discovered her through like a cool choreographer, Cheryl Murakami in New York. And then I just was like, as soon as I heard that song on her MySpace, I added it to mine. And that was like before her album dropped. And then like, I. Look, we've all been early to things, right? I get it. But this is my. My one big success story.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And she followed you.

[Esther Povitsky]

How soon did she follow you? Follow you on what?

[Annie Lederman]

On. Just on Twitter. She just followed a bunch of her early fans back on Twitter. But I will say this. When we went to see her at the House of Blues in Chicago in 2009, she had like handful of fans that she let see the second show for free, and I was one of them.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow.

[Annie Lederman]

I didn't meet her. But was she peak?

[Esther Povitsky]

Like, you didn't see her face then? Was she peak costume?

[Annie Lederman]

No, you saw her face. You saw her face?

[Esther Povitsky]

Really?

[Annie Lederman]

And now Gaga is like having a total resurgence right now. She's topped all top 10 songs globally. Spotify are all old Gaga songs. And I just want to say to the new Gaga fans, Google for Future Love is a song by Lady Gaga. It's an unreleased song. It's one of her best and I hope she releases it one day.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

This is not quite the same, but my good friend who is a porn girl, Asa Akira. Barack Obama follows her.

[Annie Lederman]

What?

[Katherine Blamford]

I love her again.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's one of the early fan. I don't know how it worked out, but I want to say it's similar to. It's like she was one of Barack's maybe early fans.

[Katherine Blamford]

Can I say something? It could be his intern. Because you know how Barack also puts out the playlist every year.

[Esther Povitsky]

Why are you talking to Michelle right Now, you don't have to defend it to me. No, no.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

This was like early senator Barack Barack Obama.

[Katherine Blamford]

Okay. But still Obama today. You know how he plays? Puts out the playlist and he's like, oh, My favorite is 365 by Charlie XCX. I said, excuse me. 365. You know that song?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. Yes.

[Katherine Blamford]

He's Got Daughters, arguably the most unhinged song she's ever written. 365 Party Gal. 365 Barack Obama trying to calm down in the car. 365 Party Gal. 365 Party Guy is like the most like, you will get schizophrenia if you're on the verge listening to the song. And I love Charlie. Biggest Charlie fan. But that one and that one I go hard to. But Barack Obama is not. That's not on his. That is not a song he listens to. No.

[Esther Povitsky]

My Barack, My Barack does. My Barack. My Barack is swaggy and I think he gets a little crunk some nights with Michelle. Have you seen her dance? They know how to get down. That song changes all the time.

[Katherine Blamford]

Like ten times. If I. It put.

[Esther Povitsky]

Have you seen Barack. Quote code switch. He knows how to switch it up.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, my God.

[Esther Povitsky]

He can get down.

[Katherine Blamford]

When he's doing patois to the Jamaicans and then. And then to the gays, he's like.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, he vogues a little.

[Annie Lederman]

I'm sorry, let's. We gotta go back to something. Barack follows Asa Akira.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes, of course.

[Annie Lederman]

And you're saying it's just because she was an early supporter.

[Katherine Blamford]

Her sex work is work and he knows it.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I think so.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. He supports women also.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Like, we did a podcast together like 10 years ago and he followed her. So I was like, oh, maybe he just did the Gaga route. Which is. I'll follow all my followers.

[Esther Povitsky]

What, Twitter, Instagram.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I mean, Twitter back then.

[Esther Povitsky]

Twitter.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

So still is very. You know, you can post anything. Like the most X rated stuff.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. So is she. Was she posting X rated stuff or is she posting any, like, just genuine.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I think maybe. Maybe both. I think at this time, this was like her haiku period.

[Annie Lederman]

You sound like a girl that just found out her boyfriend is following a bunch of porn stars on Instagram. And you're really trying to justify it. You're like, it's just because they followed him first and he likes his supporters.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, I do sound like that.

[Stella]

He also followed me on Twitter because I was one of his first supporters.

[Esther Povitsky]

Really?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, okay.

[Esther Povitsky]

See, no, don't.

[Katherine Blamford]

That.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No, that's.

[Annie Lederman]

But you're also a pretty Asian girl.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Stella]

Oh, now we're fetish.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, they're both talking. So ice queen.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, I see. Okay, so where's our. Now we're the ones that are. What's wrong with us? I'm gonna be a pick me girl for mama. I'm gonna be like. I'm just gonna be like, stand by his house. Do he stays by party guy with the boombox.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Are we ever gonna get another president as hot as Barack?

[Esther Povitsky]

Nope.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Or never. Swaggy as him? Never.

[Esther Povitsky]

Right.

[Annie Lederman]

Well, I think we gotta. Let's bring W back into the conversation.

[Katherine Blamford]

Okay.

[Annie Lederman]

W versus Barack. I think there's. I think there's something there.

[Esther Povitsky]

Okay. So my phone, for a long time was. There's a picture of Barack walking down a hallway somewhere, and he has, like, the Santa bag. Sloane over slain Sloan over his shoulder. It is the drippiest photo you can find on the Internet.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, this one?

[Esther Povitsky]

Oh, yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, my God.

[Esther Povitsky]

That's my president.

[Katherine Blamford]

I've never seen that.

[Esther Povitsky]

That's my Santa Claus incident. Dang. There's no other president in history that hot.

[Annie Lederman]

Not Abraham Lincoln.

[Esther Povitsky]

He was like, a freak hot. You know? He was like, vampire hot.

[Annie Lederman]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

You know, ladies, we need to wake back up. We are putting our bar too low. Come back, come back. We are justifying. We are making excuses. We are like, he is pretty cute.

[Annie Lederman]

Okay, let's turn against men. Let's turn back against.

[Esther Povitsky]

Sorry.

[Annie Lederman]

No, no, no, wait. We have a list of the most insane thing that a man has said to someone in public. Can we pull that up?

[Katherine Blamford]

Ooh, fun.

[Annie Lederman]

I can't read. Okay, will you read it, Stella?

[Stella]

I'm admittedly overweight. I forgot something in the grocery store, so I had to go back in. A man walked up next to me and said, going back in for seconds.

[Esther Povitsky]

Ooh, I would love that.

[Annie Lederman]

I feel like my dad would say that to me.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, my gosh.

[Annie Lederman]

Wait, this is. I'm in a wheelchair, and men often come up to me and say, you're too pretty to be in a wheelchair.

[Katherine Blamford]

Thanks. Oh, my gosh.

[Annie Lederman]

Wow.

[Esther Povitsky]

Gee, my mom would always say that. She said, if you scowl like that, you're gonna end up in a wheelchair, you ugly person. No, she wouldn't say that.

[Stella]

I was ignoring a man trying to get my attention outside Walmart. And when I passed him, he went, wow, Sassy and bowlegging. I think about it this day.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

This would hurt me.

[Annie Lederman]

Which one? Bow legged?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Actually, it wouldn't hurt me. It would be like, all right, touche. Like, wow, Great observation.

[Esther Povitsky]

I'm Always jealous of bow legged people because I'm knock kneed. So I always was. Because bow legged people have a thigh gap.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

But I thought that knock knees were because of the bow legs.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, my. Like my whole top of my legs all come in and touch together. Together. And then after the knees, it kind of goes out.

[Annie Lederman]

What is it?

[Katherine Blamford]

That's what it's called.

[Annie Lederman]

Can you stand up and demonstrate?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

[Annie Lederman]

I've never heard of knock knee.

[Katherine Blamford]

What? So that means the knees touch.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, when you. When you're running.

[Esther Povitsky]

But I also have very strong, thick thighs. Would you like to touch them? Yes.

[Annie Lederman]

Whoa. I know when you have a big nice ass too.

[Katherine Blamford]

Come on.

[Annie Lederman]

Her ass is crazy.

[Esther Povitsky]

I'll never have you. You have like a huge gap, don't you?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I do have a tiny gap that never goes away.

[Esther Povitsky]

It never goes away.

[Katherine Blamford]

I don't know.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I hate thigh gaps.

[Annie Lederman]

Then why do you like skinny jeans? Caught you.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I. I didn't like skinny jeans. They just looked exceptional on me. I'm sorry.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, they look great. Good leg shape.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Thank you.

[Katherine Blamford]

You didn't like the creature from Shape of Water? He had a spy gap. They created a creature, a made up creature, you know, but he was like hot because they had sex. She was attracted to him.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Is this a Guillermo del Toro?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes. Shape of Water. The creature. There's a sea creature. Y a secret. And they made sure he had a thigh gap.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I. Of all the things I noticed about him, I didn't notice the thigh gap.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. Didn't he have 26 abs?

[Katherine Blamford]

He had many things going on. Whole big old eyes. He was a creature. Water creature.

[Esther Povitsky]

I was so hot. It was 50 shades of freak, that show. I loved it.

[Katherine Blamford]

Right? Yeah. No, it was a moment.

[Esther Povitsky]

Was it the egg? Wasn't he like obsessed with the egg or something he ate?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, he loved eating eggs. He ate.

[Annie Lederman]

Called a movie, a show.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

It's very like old Southern lady.

[Katherine Blamford]

I'm still thinking about also Bon Iver how you're like, you gotta put Bonnie. The type of men Bonnie ver would attract. I wonder.

[Esther Povitsky]

She's putting a college essay as her favorite song.

[Katherine Blamford]

Have you seen a picture of Bonnie Bear?

[Stella]

I mean, it makes sense. It's making a lot of sense.

[Annie Lederman]

You put.

[Esther Povitsky]

You might as well put like the Gettysburg Address. It's cool.

[Katherine Blamford]

That would be cool.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That would be pretty cool.

[Katherine Blamford]

That would catch my attention. I would be like, okay, so what.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Was your MySpace song?

[Katherine Blamford]

My MySpace song? I don't remember. So where was the song that you.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

On the left side.

[Katherine Blamford]

I don't remember.

[Esther Povitsky]

Okay. I had so many. Okay. I had.

[Annie Lederman]

Never mind.

[Esther Povitsky]

Ying Yang twin song. When there was like, they had the whistles at the top. No, not the whisper song. It was whistles.

[Katherine Blamford]

No, it goes. What? Which one? It was a bunch of whistles. There's a lot of whistles in there.

[Esther Povitsky]

That one. There was a Pussycat Doll song.

[Annie Lederman]

What's. You know, what's that song?

[Esther Povitsky]

I can't remember. But then my friend and I would always compete to find the, like, I had MySpace in high school, so it was like 2007. Ish. We were always competing to find the, like. Remember the Sean Mullins lullaby song? Can we.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes, please sing it?

[Esther Povitsky]

You know this song? Everyone knows this song. And we were so obsessed with finding this kind of esque of a song where it was like, it wasn't emo and it wasn't alternative. It was like in between emo and alternative. It was that kind of 2000 thousands. You know what it was? This is the songs you're obsessed with. You would watch, like, the cw. You would watch One Tree Hill. You would watch Dawson's Creek and they always had like a song at the end or a feature song and bands. If you could get your song on that show, you would, like, pop off.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

Because like, how you made it back then.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Dawson's Creek song, was that like a Paula Cole song, Right?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes. That's what. That's what thrived back then. And we were always finding the new one. And our MySpace song would change every week. It was my joy in life. See?

[Katherine Blamford]

So describing yourself with one song is kind of fun.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

She changed it every week also.

[Esther Povitsky]

Jesus Walks by Kanye. Listen, it was a different time.

[Annie Lederman]

It sure was.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Iconic albums, early albums. Iconic.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wait, so for those, like, things that the guys were saying to the women, really quick, I want to say there was a tweet that I saw. It was a guy who witnessed this. Okay. Okay. So a girl was getting catcalled in the streets. This stranger said to her, hey, nice ass. And then she just goes, thanks. That's where my poo poo comes from. And he freaked out. And I was like, that's brilliant. Genius. You gotta be weirder back.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, you have to kinda like that.

[Katherine Blamford]

My poo poo. That's where I keep my poo poo. I think that's what she said. I think that's what she said. That's where I keep my poo. Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

I love that. Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

Cause fuck these guys.

[Annie Lederman]

Katherine, you got a lot of poo poo in there.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes, I Do.

[Esther Povitsky]

I'll take some of you poo poo. You probably can't hold onto that much. I take you poo poo.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, Move your poo poo maker.

[Esther Povitsky]

You know, I'll take it.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes.

[Stella]

I just want to ask the room. Has a man, ever, a stranger, ever come up and like tickled your foot or rubbed your belly when you were pregnant or anything like that? That okay?

[Esther Povitsky]

No. Well, I tickled your foot.

[Stella]

Well, there's one of these guys.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

They were.

[Stella]

He was getting a petty and he tickled my foot. She was getting a petty and he was right next to her and he tickled her foot. So I'm wondering, like, if that's ever happened. Then I remember Ali Wong in her special talked about a guy coming and rubbing her belly. And then I know friends who had that happen.

[Esther Povitsky]

The belly thing probably happened. I, I do that. I can't help myself.

[Annie Lederman]

Maybe women, but I don't know. I put off a vibe. Like a don't touch me vibe.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

I don't think you would come up and rub my belly. I don't think you would.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, I would not rub your belly. I would rub others.

[Katherine Blamford]

Really? Okay. Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

I can't help it, dude. I realized if I was a guy, I'd be in so much trouble now. I'm a toucher and I realized I touch ass. I touch my girlfriend's asses. I just went to the Beyonce concert and my friend was with me and we were taking pictures outside the stadium. She was kind of like posing and another woman was walking by and just smacked her ass. Ass. And she felt so weird about it. And I was like, I kind of understood the other woman. I was like, that's. I, I, maybe, maybe again, it's the Southern thing, but it's. I'm. I'm touchy. And I realize now, I don't know, I. It's. It's a hard thing to break.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Maybe the culture of not necessarily the south, but it's like girls in a, In a bathroom at a club.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, it's that I would do an all girls Catholic high school.

[Stella]

Oh, there it is.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, but we just like touching each other.

[Annie Lederman]

It's less.

[Esther Povitsky]

We were licking each other off.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I went from all girls school to Catholic school and by God, yeah, we were. We bred lesbians.

[Esther Povitsky]

We sat on each other's laps and braided our hair during English class.

[Katherine Blamford]

That's different. Then.

[Esther Povitsky]

Wait. Okay. I do this and I feel like I should break it. But like after shows, when people, when you do, like pictures and meet and greets or whatever. I am so scared about other people feeling bad about, like, knowing where to touch me or what to do that I grab everyone and I hold everyone and I'm like, it's okay. We don't have to feel weird here. And I realize I've made men uncomfortable by, like, how much I've just grabbed them and taken pictures.

[Stella]

Where are you grabbing them?

[Esther Povitsky]

Shoulders.

[Katherine Blamford]

Shoulders.

[Esther Povitsky]

But I am scared of the awkwardness.

[Annie Lederman]

And I don't mean this in a mean way.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Are you a guy's girl? You're. But you don't seem like it. But you're so tough. Rough and tough, Right? Come on, help me out.

[Katherine Blamford]

She told her to change her profile. Be someone else for. For. For a guy.

[Esther Povitsky]

Wait, I don't want to be. I want to be.

[Annie Lederman]

No, be yourself.

[Katherine Blamford]

Put Bon.

[Esther Povitsky]

Girls girl.

[Katherine Blamford]

Bon iver.

[Annie Lederman]

I've heard you have girls girl energy too, though. I think think it's like more you're physically like a strong guy.

[Katherine Blamford]

Like, she's anti mother. Yeah. She says she smacks people's asses. I said, I'm glad you're not a guy.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, maybe jail.

[Katherine Blamford]

Jail.

[Esther Povitsky]

I think I'm a lesbian without the lesbian.

[Katherine Blamford]

Do not put this on lesbians.

[Esther Povitsky]

I know they get mad.

[Katherine Blamford]

Will come for you.

[Esther Povitsky]

I know I will be a lesbian one day.

[Annie Lederman]

Do you think you're bi?

[Esther Povitsky]

I watch women porn, but I don't know if I could ever do. I've never followed through.

[Katherine Blamford]

Okay.

[Esther Povitsky]

Why? I don't even know if that makes. Means that I'm into women. I think I just. There's no. I can't get off of Ben being like.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

My whole rule is if I watch porn and there's a guy's face, I'm out. I run away. I'll smash my screen.

[Esther Povitsky]

I'll smash my screen. New laptop.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I want to see his face.

[Katherine Blamford]

Like, body.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. You're no use to me. Your eyes are no. No use to me.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I feel offended. Who are you? Stupid haircut danger.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I hate the way your mouth is moving. Why are you talking? No talking, please. Only, like, waist down. That's your only purpose to me. Because it's like I am so particular about, like, I think. What, like my body being touched by a man?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yes.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That. It's like if. If I don't already know you, we don't already have a rapport. And I trust you with my safety. I don't want you to see you naked. Like, I feel unsafe is what it is. So it's. But with women like you know, women, we don't hurt each other in that way. I think I'm just terrified of a stranger on the screen.

[Katherine Blamford]

I felt that stranger danger on my Europe tour because usually when, you know, my fans are, like, 70% women and then 30% men, but they're mostly gay. And they'll show up to my shows wearing wigs of my bowl cut. And a lot of times they're. And if it's men, it's always. They're always gay, right? Yeah. So they do that, you know, and when I was in Europe, the wigs are my bow cut. Yeah, it's like a little army.

[Esther Povitsky]

Are you serious?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes. That's so cute.

[Esther Povitsky]

You sell them.

[Katherine Blamford]

I guess I could, but you should sell them. I guess I could. Then it's a real cult. Yeah, comedy is a cult. No. So, you know, usually I'm used to, like, like, gay men doing it, and then I'll bring them on stage at the end if I. If I'm able to spot them. In Europe, it was the first time I had, like, more straight. Straight guys who were fans who weren't afraid to. And it's different, I guess I was like, whoa, I'm not used to this. Where it was my first ever Europe tour. I was like, oh, European men aren't as afraid to be like, yeah, I'm here supporting a female comedian. You know what I mean?

[Annie Lederman]

That's so frustrating.

[Katherine Blamford]

It was so weird in Ireland. In Ireland, you know, one. One guy was like, I'm wearing your wig. I was like, okay, come on up. Come on up. And I was like, what's your name, sweetie? And he was like, saying whatever he. His name was. And then we took the picture, and then he was like, okay, I'm gonna go sit back down next to my wife. I was like, you have a wife. I almost pushed him. I almost pushed him.

[Esther Povitsky]

Get out of my stage.

[Katherine Blamford]

I almost pushed him. I said, you have a wife. He's like that. It just came out. Like, I didn't even. I wasn't even trying to be a jumpy girl, but it's that stranger danger feeling. My husband had to protect him because I was like, you have a what? Like, it was like that almost pushed him off stage.

[Esther Povitsky]

Wow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

So funny.

[Katherine Blamford]

We were very high up. He would have gotten hurt.

[Esther Povitsky]

He would have been fine.

[Katherine Blamford]

I'm glad I didn't do that.

[Annie Lederman]

It's so, like, a green flag and such a turn on when, like, a straight man is a. Is supportive of a female artist.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I agree.

[Annie Lederman]

It's. There's something about the chemistry there that. Where I'm like, oh, he's, like, secure.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's secure. He's cool.

[Annie Lederman]

He likes women.

[Katherine Blamford]

He came wearing a wig on my body. I don't know how long he had to travel looking like that in public.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

You know what I mean?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's usually like, oh, I'm here because my wife likes you, and they have to let you know, and they have to justify themselves. I don't get it.

[Katherine Blamford]

Right. Yeah.

[Esther Povitsky]

Or even the women that have to come up to you and be like, I don't like women, but I like you. And I'm like, why are you on yourself? Why are you hurting yourself?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, but please, like, no male.

[Esther Povitsky]

And porn, and they all have dumb haircuts.

[Katherine Blamford]

It would be hard to do porn with. You know, what to do with your face. Is this. It is. Like, I've wondered that, you know, how do I look when I'm performing sexual things?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I know I don't. You know, I recently I would try.

[Katherine Blamford]

To keep a smile the whole time. But that's a serial killer, right? Who's that? You would. You would throw your laptop.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I feel like that's its own, like, niche, kind of like.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

A smiling one.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

The whole time.

[Stella]

I have a quick question for all of you that I've been wondering. Do you laugh during sex, like, with your partner?

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah, I do, but we're sick in the head.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. But you've also been together for so long, right?

[Katherine Blamford]

Right, Right. Yeah. Yeah.

[Stella]

Like a new person. If you've been dating them for, like, three months, would you laugh?

[Esther Povitsky]

I think that's so hot.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I'm so in disagreement with it.

[Katherine Blamford]

What, serious?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Serious? Or like, my. The part of my brain that has to switch on in order for me to feel is so far away from the part of my brain that laughs.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, wow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

So there's no humor. In order for this to turn on, this part has to shut off. It's, like, serious and, like, whoa.

[Katherine Blamford]

Sort of like this.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I can't be giggly or anything like that.

[Annie Lederman]

Really?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

What are we doing? We're serious. We're fucking. We're adults. We're not gonna be, like, giggly little girls, like, laughing.

[Esther Povitsky]

So if they even crack a joke or make a funny thing, are you out of it immediately?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Immediately. So I was with Bobby for a decade.

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah. That's how I was trying not to ask that.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No, I was about to. This is. He knows the rules. Like, we can't. One of the reasons that we talked about it on Tiger Belly, I. If he would Try to be, like, funny in bed. I'd be like, oh, I'm out. Like, it totally takes me out of it. You can't be cute and silly. We have our moments for that. We're laughing 99% of the day. But when it's time to do this, can we, like, just get a little serious? Just a little bit.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You're not like that. You guys are incredible. I wish I had more flexibility in that way.

[Esther Povitsky]

It's so hot, to be honest. Be funny in yourself and sexual. Like, I think I feel like to be sexual and have your humor intertwined is like the. It's like an explosion.

[Katherine Blamford]

Sometimes funny things happen by accident.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That.

[Katherine Blamford]

That.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, right.

[Katherine Blamford]

Something. Sometimes you have to be like.

[Esther Povitsky]

And this is white versus Asian.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I don't like to acknowledge.

[Annie Lederman]

No, she likes it.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, are you kidding? I'm in the bed with my husband. I'm Was like, come on in. You know, things like that. Yeah. About my hole. I'm like, come on in. And then, you know, he's laughing and I'm like, okay, yeah, that was weird. Anyway. And he's like, knock, knock. You know, it's like that. But. But sometimes. I'm just saying to her, though, like, sometimes funny things accidentally did happen. Would happen. Right.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Bobby and I were notorious role players. So it's not. This is also why I needed him to be serious. It was like we would role play the part. The example that everyone knows about is, for instance, like, I'm a shoemaker and he is an aristocrat.

[Katherine Blamford]

See, but this is already funny.

[Annie Lederman]

But this is hilarious.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I giggle if I break character. Then the sex part is done. So it's like I'm going door to door as, like, you know, as a cobbler, just basically, like, measuring his foot and stuff. But if he cannot laugh, I cannot laugh. Like, we have to be in character.

[Katherine Blamford]

That's so hard because my husband also role plays too.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

I like Gang Bang. So he has to.

[Annie Lederman]

He has to play many roles.

[Katherine Blamford]

He's always tapping in and out of. Hey, it's. And he kept doing this thing where he would announce the name of the person. So I know it's a different person. He goes, hey, it's Jean Pierre. And then he would always name their job too. Always. Hey, it's Jean Pierre the bus driver. And then tap it. And then. And then he would go, ah, I'll be back getting. Getting my. My boy in here. My other boy. And it's. Hey, it's Matt, the tour guide by the.

[Esther Povitsky]

This is like the intro of a bachelorette episode.

[Katherine Blamford]

By the third one. Yeah, by the third one, I was. We were cracking up. I was like. I was like, Ryan, why? Why? Always the job too. Always blue collar jobs too.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Wait, this is so interesting. The gang bang thing.

[Katherine Blamford]

So how do you not laugh? You know, because obviously it's like he's going crazy. He's like, I need to help. I'm out of ideas. I'm out of ideas.

[Annie Lederman]

I am a writer.

[Katherine Blamford]

I know. It's a writer's room. A one man improv team. And I'm just laying there with the gangbang thing.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's so interesting because I feel as though I totally get that. Which is the reason why I like the role play. Because it's a different person each time.

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, yes, right.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It taps into that fantasy of, like, that's I could no longer have sex with my partner as him, so he had to come in as someone else.

[Annie Lederman]

Shoemaker.

[Katherine Blamford]

And arrest the cry. What did you just watch?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

A lowly shoemaker. Yeah.

[Katherine Blamford]

The facts you have to know to even be able to.

[Esther Povitsky]

Was this from like a movie you watch as a child?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I have so many characters, you guys. If you guys need tips and if you're running out of steam.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yes. He's like, I have a bus driver janitor. He's done. He's like, out of jobs.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Out of jobs.

[Annie Lederman]

You should start a TikTok channel. That's like. Okay, today's role play, I recommend, like a little like a menu. You're the chef and you cook up the ideas for everybody and you give us, like, our parts. You have to go.

[Katherine Blamford]

Okay.

[Esther Povitsky]

Wait, where are you going?

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, am I allowed to?

[Esther Povitsky]

Yeah, we need to do it.

[Annie Lederman]

I was protecting you.

[Esther Povitsky]

No, I think we need to do it.

[Annie Lederman]

Do you want to tell her?

[Esther Povitsky]

Is that okay really fast. You have to go.

[Katherine Blamford]

No, no, do. Yeah, please. Wait, what's happening?

[Esther Povitsky]

I need to do it.

[Annie Lederman]

Okay, well, let me introduce this.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Okay.

[Katherine Blamford]

Yeah.

[Annie Lederman]

Kyla and Stella. Catherine has something that she wants to tell you guys.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Okay.

[Katherine Blamford]

Wow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

We got to like, release. Release you.

[Esther Povitsky]

I think.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes.

[Annie Lederman]

Oh, you.

[Katherine Blamford]

How's it going?

[Annie Lederman]

Are you on tour?

[Katherine Blamford]

Oh, I am on tour. I am on tour. And my special father is out on Hulu and Disney plus my sophomore special.

[Annie Lederman]

It's on Hulu. Go watch it. We love her. Atuko father, thank you for being here.

[Katherine Blamford]

Thank you so much for having me. Thank you.

[Annie Lederman]

But we're not ending.

[Katherine Blamford]

You stay o. I love leaving all this drama. Bye.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Bye, bye. I love you so much.

[Esther Povitsky]

Wait, I need to explain myself.