Harry Jowsey is our Valentine

Summary

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Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn

Episode: Harry Jowsey is our Valentine

Date: February 10, 2026
Guests: Harry Jowsey

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Episode Overview

This episode of Trash Tuesday celebrates all things Valentine's Day with reality TV star and “part mermaid,” Harry Jowsey, as the honorary Valentine. Hosts Esther Povitsky and Khalyla Kuhn dive into dating philosophies, relationship red flags, love bombing, the allure of short people, why single moms win, plus wild tales from their romantic pasts. Hilarious, self-deprecating, and full of wild hot takes, the trio mix advice with personal confessions, all in the signature Trash Tuesday irreverent style.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Soul Gazing & Chemistry Tests

• The episode opens with an introduction to “soul gazing”—staring into each other’s eyes for five minutes.
  • Harry: “It's really intense. Don't try it.” (00:07)
  • Khalyla: “Then you'll know that I have bad breath.” (00:14)
• They joke about putting personal, revealing content only on Patreon for safe keeping and to limit the audience. (00:27–00:48)

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2. Food Hot Takes—From Burger King to Aussie Meat Pies

• Harry says Burger King would be his last meal, sparking surprise from Esther and Khalyla.
  • Harry: “The double Whopper thingy, fries, onion.” (01:13)
  • Khalyla: “I actually do like Burger King. I'm not gonna lie. But I'm just surprised.” (01:28)
• Harry is unimpressed with In-N-Out and prefers an Aussie meat pie from “Bronze Pie Shop” in LA. (06:08–06:23)
• Australians have “the best coffee” and an active, healthy outdoor culture.
  • Harry: “The best thing about Australia? ...the sun is, like, up at 4:50am and everyone's outside and everyone’s hot. ...dads walking with their strollers.” (06:39–07:07)

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3. Height & Body Talk: Flamingos, SUVs, and Short People’s Virtues

• The women rib Harry for being “too tall” and discuss their usual “Gremlin” types.
  • Esther: “We don't know what to do with your type. Esther and I usually go for Gremlins.” (01:47)
  • Harry: “My legs are so skinny...I'm just built like a flamingo.” (02:06)
• The group riffs on calf implants, BBLs, and the environmental impacts of height:
  • Esther: "You, Harry, is an SUV. You’re a little Prius. You're just more economical.” (12:54)
• Preferences in dating height: Harry dates women 5’3”-5’4”, finds short girls “sassy.” (13:24–13:40)
• Memorable Moment: Esther argues “Short people are better for the environment.” (12:28)

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4. Valentine’s Traditions & Relationship Gestures

• Memories of classroom Valentine’s exchanges, candy, and surprises.
• Harry describes a disastrous missed-birthday incident and making amends with five Cheesecake Factory cakes. (07:54–08:39)
  • Harry: “I did send it, like, five cakes to her house on UberEats.” (08:35)
• The hosts reflect on love languages, being “bad recipients” of gifts, and pressures around holidays. (10:01–10:30)
• Discussions of ideal heights in partners and the struggles of being “too tall” (planes, hotel beds, etc.). (12:11–12:21)

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5. Fuckboy Image, Love Bombing, and Box Theory

• Esther: “Harry, how does it feel to be labeled a fuckboy?” (15:58)

• Harry embraces the label as an occupational hazard from reality TV but considers himself reformed.

  • Harry: “The first dating show I was on was when I was 19, I'm now 29...it has to be crazy for things to move forward.” (16:08–16:26)

• Tinks’ “Box Theory” is debated:

  • Khalyla: “Once you’re in the hookup box, you can never progress with a guy out of the hookup box into the girlfriend box. Do you think that's true?” (17:41)
  • Harry: “No. ...I've hooked up with girls and then been like, oh, that could be my girlfriend.” (18:06)

• Love Bombing Defined:

  • Harry: “I'm probably love bombing them because it never worked out.” (18:48)
  • Khalyla: “Wait, you’re a love bomber?” (19:03)
  • Harry: “Oh, it's so much fun. You should try it.” (19:05)
  • For Harry, love bombing isn’t about manipulation, just being “excited by love.” (20:09–20:55)

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6. Single Moms—The Fuckboy Kryptonite?

• Esther’s “theory” that “fuckboys” settle with single moms (“they see someone who can take care of a kid and think, ‘maybe she can do that for me’”).
  • Harry: “I just think single moms are so sexy and fun.” (47:13)
• Harry credits the appeal to responsibility, empowerment, and less drama.
  • Harry: “They have a lot on their plate and they're getting shit done.” (47:22)
  • Esther: “You’ll never be number one … you have to really behave.” (47:50)
• Single moms, Harry says, “know exactly what they want” and bring extra sass. (49:06–49:25)

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7. Listener Questions: Cheating, Backsliding, and Getting Over Betrayal

Cheating & Betrayal Recovery:

• Advice includes self-reflection, practical planning (secure your own stability before confronting), and sometimes “exposing the truth” online for catharsis. (35:28–39:41)
• Khalyla: “The person who's cheating is the one who's hurting… it has nothing to do with you.” (37:26)

Hooking Up with High School Exes:

• The group is divided on whether you should rekindle an old flame.
• Esther: “I don't like to backpedal into old territory… there's already like an ick.”
• Harry: “I love spinning the block. It’s so fun… worst case, you get a little sausage.” (41:18, 44:48)

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8. Relationship Resilience & Distance

• The appeal of “distance” as a pseudo-love language.
  • Harry: “Distance is, like, really nice...if you can be away from someone and miss them, that's kind of nice.” (23:04, 23:41)
• Confessions of enjoying long-distance relationships for the breathing room.
  • Esther: “For most of my 20s, I only dated boys from different countries because of the distance.” (26:13)
• Esther: “You kind of microdose falling in love.” (26:56)

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9. Tips for a Great Valentine’s Day Date

The Group’s Favorite Ideas:

• Activity dates: Paint & sip, clay building, cooking class (“romantic, not just a meal”)
• Harry: “I think that's the best date… you're doing an activity together and it’s not like an interrogation.” (57:20)
• Esther: “Dinner is boring. But strenuous physical stuff on early dates—NO hiking.” (58:41–59:07)
• Jokingly: “Adopt a dog together!” (61:41)

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10. Life & Laughs: Bananas, Body Mods & Being a Grown-up

• The trio exchange funny “ick” triggers (bad breath, stinky vapes), share plastic surgery mistakes, and debate opening bananas “the right way.”
• Esther (on banana-eating bros): “Shut the fuck up. I'm the ultimate banana eater. I eat six a day. Don't tell me to open a banana.” (50:17)
• Brief digression on sports: Harry co-owns an LA rugby team and is unimpressed by the long, slow pace of the NFL. (52:26–53:28)
• Dishing on Tom Brady, facelifts, and athletic kids’ futures. (54:11–56:11)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On love bombing intensity:

  • “My problem is I’m so excited by love and being in a relationship ... for like a week.”
    — Harry Jowsey (20:14)

• On single moms:

  • “I just think single moms are so sexy and fun ... they're getting shit done.”
    — Harry Jowsey (47:13–47:22)

• On dating advice:

  • “Men ain't shit. ...Happiness is the most attractive thing in yourself. ...Focus on being happy and loving yourself and that will happen.”
    — Harry Jowsey (64:23)

• On short people v. tall people:

  • "You, Harry, is an SUV. You’re a little Prius. ...We have to figure out where to park, Harry.”
    — Esther Povitsky (12:54)

• On “soul gazing”:

  • “It’s really intense. Don’t try it.”
    — Harry Jowsey (00:07)
  • "I start crying within the first 30 seconds.”
    — Esther Povitsky (66:36)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Soul gazing & opening banter: 00:00–00:27
• Burger King / food debate: 01:13–02:23, 06:08–07:17
• Height/short people & dating preferences: 01:45–02:21, 12:04–13:49
• Valentine’s Day traditions: 07:17–07:54
• Birthday forgetfulness saga: 07:54–09:16
• Love bombing & Box Theory: 15:58–19:16
• Single moms discussion: 47:13–49:25
• Cheater recovery advice: 35:11–39:48
• Rekindling high school romance debate: 40:16–44:48
• Long-distance relationships: 26:02–27:12
• Valentine’s date ideas: 57:00–60:41
• Harry’s dating advice for women: 64:23–65:08
• Soul gazing experiment redux: 65:22–66:36

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Closing Thoughts

This episode is a candid, hilarious, and unexpectedly heartwarming look at modern love, dating rituals, and romantic mishaps, with Harry Jowsey’s openness and the hosts’ classic self-roast energy. Listeners are left with both real relationship advice and plenty of comedic one-liners to bring into their own V-Day—plus the uplifting reminder to lead with happiness, sass, and a little bit of “Prius” energy in a world full of SUVs.

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Transcript

[Esther]

Do you know what soul gazing is, Esther?

[Host 1]

No, I don't like how it sounds.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, you just like staring each other's eyes like five minutes.

[Esther]

Oh, have you done that with anyone?

[Harry Jowsey]

It's really intense. Don't try it.

[Host 1]

Okay, no, come close, come close.

[Harry Jowsey]

You have to like, stare at each other's eyes.

[Host 1]

Then you'll know that I have bad breath.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, really?

[Esther]

And you'll only last a week and.

[Harry Jowsey]

A half, but you have to do it like five minutes.

[Host 1]

Oh, my God. I can't. You know, we have a Patreon.

[Esther]

I think it's the funnest place to be. I think you guys are missing out. If you haven't already signed up for the Patreon.

[Host 1]

And every week when we do edit these episodes, we go. Okay, you know what? I shouldn't have shared that. Guys, that's going to the Patreon. Okay? Patreon. Only because I'm too self absorbed to cut it completely. But it's got to be in a.

[Esther]

Safe space, limited audience.

[Host 1]

And if you join now, you will get instant access to a backlog of a year's worth of bonus content. So if you're just like, I got to have a really great weekend this weekend. Join us on the [e-mail] Trash Tuesday podcast. Harry says that Burger King would be his last meal. Yeah. What's your order? What's your order?

[Harry Jowsey]

The double Whopper thingy, fries, onion. Yeah.

[Host 1]

Ew.

[Harry Jowsey]

I don't care about that stuff.

[Esther]

Just wait. Compared to others. Burger King. Is it for you?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, yeah, of course, of course, of course.

[Esther]

With a lot of people. I know you're a Burger King. Kind of.

[Host 1]

I actually do like Burger King. I'm not gonna lie. But I'm just surprised. Surprised to hear it. You don't hit Burger King gets on so much.

[Harry Jowsey]

I'm trying to get a brand deal, I think.

[Host 1]

Yeah, I'm rooting for you.

[Harry Jowsey]

Please.

[Host 1]

Today we have Harry Jowsey.

[Harry Jowsey]

We going, wow.

[Host 1]

His height is an issue.

[Esther]

We don't know what to do with your. With your type. Esther and I usually go for Gremlins.

[Harry Jowsey]

Okay.

[Esther]

Yeah. So like it's very jarring to. Right? Is it not?

[Host 1]

Six, four foot, five.

[Harry Jowsey]

Ew. I know. Get a grip. No, but the thing is, like my legs are so skinny. So it's really.

[Esther]

Are they really something you try to hide?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, I train them like every day. But just cuz the muscles so long, I'm just built like a flamingo.

[Host 1]

Oh my God.

[Esther]

But that's kind of cute. Cuz A lot of men, which I think is kind of. Well, you can do whatever you want with your body. No judgment, but the calf implants are a little bit of an ick for me.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, okay.

[Esther]

If you want to go to.

[Harry Jowsey]

I was talking to a friend yesterday. He's like, you get silicone cough implants. I'm like, oh, wow. Because I was thinking, I'm like, you know, maybe I should get a bbl.

[Host 1]

You know, as a woman who's currently eight months pregnant, the most dangerous poison in this room is this man's sperm. Because if he. Imagine if he got me pregnant, how I would break.

[Esther]

You would die. You would break in half.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wait. Okay.

[Host 1]

I'm scared.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's normal sperm. It's not, like, going to hit you like a shotgun blast.

[Host 1]

Like, it's not just going to jump out.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Like, it's not going to grow legs and walk over and attack you. Like, what are you talking about?

[Host 1]

Scared?

[Esther]

Wait, this is true. Although my mom wasn't as small as you, but My dad was 6 4.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And she. She went into labor. I think it was, like, June 29th. And my. My sister didn't come out till, like, July 2nd, so she was in there for a long time, pushing, pushing, suffering, until they had to get her out with force. So I think your theory is correct.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wait, that's a. Tall people or a problem?

[Host 1]

Well, if you're smaller and you. You can't mate with a tall person if you're small.

[Harry Jowsey]

I love meeting with small people.

[Host 1]

You have.

[Harry Jowsey]

Not really.

[Host 1]

I'm gonna hurt them.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Oh, okay. I'm really sorry.

[Host 1]

Wait, I saw that you were in a movie with my best friend, Miranda Cosgrove.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is that your best friend?

[Host 1]

Yes.

[Harry Jowsey]

She's awesome.

[Host 1]

Oh, my God. Did you have fun with her? What was she like? Was she total weirdo?

[Harry Jowsey]

Love her so much.

[Host 1]

I know. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

She's got, like, 17 cats, though, which was kind of fascinating.

[Host 1]

That's. We're not supposed to publicly share that.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, I was just telling everyone on Netflix, and they were like, hey, should we film this for social? I was like, yeah, she doesn't really know me. I'm sure we'll never cross paths again. And then we.

[Host 1]

She has. She is buried in cats as we speak.

[Harry Jowsey]

She's so lovely. And she's got, like, a wild story, too. And she's just the sweetest thing ever. I'm actually gonna go see Hannah Stocking after this.

[Esther]

Oh, you are?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Oh, my God. I love. They're the best duo.

[Harry Jowsey]

So random.

[Esther]

I know.

[Harry Jowsey]

So Random.

[Host 1]

You are an actor.

[Harry Jowsey]

I think I just try and do everything, but I'm not very good at it. I was just that the whole time leading up to that, I was practicing American accent for my line. And then as soon as I get it, like, yeah, just be Australian.

[Host 1]

Are you serious? I was like, okay, wait, let's hear your American accent.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, I can't do it. I haven't been practicing. Really?

[Esther]

Hear mine.

[Host 1]

Yeah, yeah. Can you try?

[Esther]

I've only been trying for 20 years.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wait, are you an American?

[Esther]

No, I'm from the Philippines.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wow.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Congratulations.

[Esther]

Thank you so much.

[Host 1]

It's the best.

[Harry Jowsey]

And do we go back often?

[Esther]

Often. Often.

[Harry Jowsey]

Really?

[Esther]

Yeah. You're from Australia. I know that the Philippines is such a tourist hub for Australians. Boracay. Yeah. That whole Southeast Asia corner of the.

[Harry Jowsey]

Great.

[Esther]

We got a lot of Australian.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is it really humid there, too?

[Esther]

Yeah, it's really humid.

[Harry Jowsey]

I love that when you feel musty, because that's where it's like, where I'm from.

[Esther]

There's a climate for you, right. That's a climate that perfectly matches with your body. And I will say that everyone hates humidity. I love it.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

I love it. Put me right in the equator.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh.

[Esther]

Make my hair just big and frizzy and with, like, volume. It's so sticky and good.

[Host 1]

I think I've yet to find my climate. Do you have any suggestions? What?

[Esther]

Let's see. You have allergies in Hawaii.

[Host 1]

Really?

[Esther]

So that's a problem?

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

In Hawaii.

[Host 1]

In Hawaii, like, something happens to me where I can't breathe. My. Like, it's really. I'm literally allergic.

[Esther]

You don't. You don't live there? Yeah. That's not your climate?

[Host 1]

No.

[Harry Jowsey]

Maybe somewhat cold. Antarctica. Have you tried that?

[Host 1]

Oh, that's nice. Thank you.

[Harry Jowsey]

You want to do that?

[Host 1]

Ship me off?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, that's. You can do that. There's cruises that go down there.

[Host 1]

Okay, I'll try. But I want to hear more about food from you because you got me going with this Burger King situation. What do you have other. Do you like in and out?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, it's like, whatever. Yeah, it's, like, hard to eat it, I think.

[Host 1]

Are there Australian place establishments here in LA that you like?

[Harry Jowsey]

There's this place called Bronze Pie Shop. That's where I get pies.

[Host 1]

What kind of pie?

[Harry Jowsey]

Like, meat pies.

[Esther]

Oh, meat pies. Like real meat pies?

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

There we go. Thank you so much.

[Esther]

And I will say, too, that, like, just Australia in general or Melbourne just getting ready.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's like over there all These clips. And I was like, oh, but you.

[Esther]

Guys have the best coffee there. Like, unbeatable. Yeah.

[Host 1]

What's your secret?

[Harry Jowsey]

I don't make coffee. I just exist. No, I don't know the. You know the best thing about Australia? I was just there, and it's. The sun is, like, up at 4:50am and everyone's outside and everyone's hot.

[Esther]

Oh, you hate that. No, I like that.

[Host 1]

That's. That's, like, so much pressure.

[Harry Jowsey]

Why? No, everyone's hot. And, you know, the crazy thing is you'd be walking in the morning and it's just all dads with their kids.

[Esther]

Oh, I like that.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, it's just all like. I remember one morning, I counted 10 dads just walking with their. With their strollers.

[Esther]

What are the moms doing?

[Harry Jowsey]

They're at home living. Having the best time.

[Host 1]

We like that. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

The dads are up early, walking the kids and getting it out, and the. And the moms are just relaxing.

[Host 1]

So today we're celebrating Valentine's Day. Do you guys have that in Australia?

[Harry Jowsey]

I think so. Yeah. For me, it's every day. That was crazy. We do. We do do that.

[Host 1]

Do you guys have Valentine's Day in general? Like, I feel like I've never had a Valentine's Day.

[Esther]

I grew up making little things for your classmates and then playing Cupid and then dropping it off. You know your friends, right? Did you not do that?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, we would. Like, you could get an order in and send them, like, love heart lollipops.

[Esther]

Yeah, yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

And do cute stuff at school. But I don't really. I'm not really, like, good at stuff like birthdays. I always miss them.

[Host 1]

That's hard.

[Esther]

That's a red flag.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, I'm the worst. It's a red flag.

[Esther]

Yeah, it's a red flag.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. There's this one. You know, I'm not even gonna say the story because it was like. It was actually really hor. Okay. So I was seeing this girl, and I was in Vegas the day before her birthday. I had no idea. And me and her, off and on, and I hooked up with a random girl. And I came back to la and I was at dinner with my best friend. She texted me. She's like, you're not even gonna wish me a happy birthday? And I was like, oh, my God. Fully forgot. And she knew about the girl. And then I was like, okay, let me just finish dinner. I'll come over. Which I should have just left right there because it was Cheesecake Factory. It wasn't that Good. But I did send it, like, five cakes to her house on UberEats.

[Host 1]

From Cheesecake Factory.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, no, just, like, whatever was open.

[Host 1]

What were you eating? Do you remember at cheesecake, it was.

[Harry Jowsey]

Chicken Caesar salad and then. Yeah.

[Host 1]

And then avocado spring rolls.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is that good? Are you hungry today?

[Host 1]

Did you. Breakfast?

[Harry Jowsey]

Did you have breakfast? Did you order something?

[Esther]

Okay, yeah. Send her a couple of the five things you sent this girl.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, I felt really bad. And then.

[Esther]

I mean, it's not necessarily that, oh, I'm not good with birthdays is a red flag for me. It's the statement of, like, I'm not good with dates or things like that, where I'm like, then get good with dates. It's like a small little, like, effort thing. I'm just scarred by Bobby.

[Host 1]

Why?

[Esther]

I think I dated Bobby Lee for 10 years. I don't know if you know who he is, but he's a. He's a comic.

[Host 1]

He's slapping in your face.

[Esther]

We lived together. We cohabitated.

[Host 1]

We had sex. What's going on with Harry?

[Esther]

Wow. Ten years. But we still. We're still friends. We still do a show together.

[Host 1]

What's coming up for you?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, no, I just met it. That's crazy.

[Esther]

He's a. He's a silly. Is a silly thing.

[Harry Jowsey]

He's so funny.

[Esther]

He's a wild, wild man.

[Harry Jowsey]

10 years is 10 years.

[Esther]

Yeah, it would be like that. It would always be, you forgot. And then this big gesture of five cakes after.

[Harry Jowsey]

That's nice. That's pretty good. Like, the guilt. If someone missed my birthday and they felt so guilty, they got me more stuff, I'm taking it.

[Host 1]

I have to agree. Birthday week.

[Esther]

Really? But you're not. Okay. You have your own issues with your birthday. I do. Where you just, like, I don't want it to exist. I want to forget about it.

[Host 1]

And I'm a bad recipient. Like, I've been with my husband for a long time, and he does. We just have no gifts anymore because he'll get me something, and I'll be like, why would you get this? Like, I don't want that. Like, I can't.

[Esther]

That's so good.

[Host 1]

I know. So we just stop. We just omit it. We don't have the holiday. No, but a card is a good idea.

[Harry Jowsey]

He should just give you food. I think that. Get you a spring roll from cheesecake.

[Host 1]

Even that will make me mad because he'll.

[Harry Jowsey]

Why are you angry? What's going on?

[Host 1]

Wait, have you ever had Levon cookies?

[Esther]

Yes, of course.

[Harry Jowsey]

Can we Feed her.

[Esther]

Yeah. No, no, no.

[Harry Jowsey]

Please, listen, this is a Valentine's Day episode or a food review, but which one?

[Esther]

Which one?

[Host 1]

Okay, Lavon, I tried it, like, a couple years ago, and I had the oatmeal raisin. I was like, this is the best cookie of my life time. My husband goes to Larchmont, which was like, the nearest Levon. He always brings me home an oatmeal raisin. And I get mad because I'm like, now I'm gonna eat this, and I'm gonna have a tummy ache. I'm not 6 5. I can't just eat a whole pizza and then, like, be fine like you.

[Harry Jowsey]

Do you hate your husband?

[Host 1]

No, I'm talking to you.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, me. Okay.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

He's not 6 5. He's little too. Is he short?

[Host 1]

You can't call men little.

[Harry Jowsey]

I can do that.

[Host 1]

He is. How tall is Dave Davis?

[Esther]

About my height.

[Host 1]

55 8. 5, 8, 5 9. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's tall for you.

[Host 1]

It's tall for me.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's.

[Host 1]

It's perfect.

[Esther]

Same with Bobby. Tall for me. Tall.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

5, 5, 3, 5, 4. That's usually the range.

[Host 1]

That's how tall he is. Yeah.

[Esther]

Yes. And with heels, I would tower, which I kind of loved.

[Host 1]

You did?

[Esther]

I did. Because I'm like, I'm not gonna change my bones. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

You know, you can shave him down.

[Esther]

I think, in China, I think.

[Harry Jowsey]

Let's go.

[Esther]

And you can lengthen. Lengthen your bones, which I feel like. Yeah. Yeah.

[Host 1]

What height are you looking for?

[Harry Jowsey]

I think any taller than 65 is just, like, actually annoying.

[Host 1]

No, but, like, in a girl.

[Harry Jowsey]

I was like, yeah. If I got any taller, I'm killing myself. Like, it's actually really annoying. You can't fit on planes. You can't do anything. Like, it's frustrating. You bang your head on everything, always looking down.

[Esther]

See?

[Host 1]

Do you have to fly in the cargo when you go on a plane?

[Harry Jowsey]

Pretty much. They take me. They take me to the wing.

[Esther]

Wait a second. This is the. This is the same thing we've been talking about for weeks. I. Short people are better for the environment.

[Host 1]

Okay, so.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yep.

[Host 1]

You. She said that to me recently, and I was like, you're just condescending to me. Like, it just sucks being short. But then I recently was, like, at a farmer's market, and this really tall couple walked past me, and my instinct was to be like, I'm so. Like, I'm so much less than them. And then I was like, no, I'm better for the world than they are.

[Harry Jowsey]

That's a good way to look at it.

[Esther]

You have to think about it like this. It's like you, Harry, is an suv. You're a little Prius. You're a hybrid. You're just more economical. You consume less. You zip around easy. We have to figure out where to park, Harry. Yeah, it's difficult. You can't fit in the compact.

[Harry Jowsey]

And I eat too much food.

[Esther]

There's. I mean, how many. That's a full tank. Maybe that tank is 500.

[Host 1]

About food. I'm, like, scared he's gonna eat all the food. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

I'm gonna eat that whole bowl of candy.

[Host 1]

But, like, what is the height you usually date?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Like five, three or less. Five, four.

[Esther]

Wow. Anything taller is like, nah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, I don't mind. It's just like. It's nice. Just little people are just so sassy.

[Esther]

They're so cute.

[Host 1]

Sassy.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. The shorter they are, the more sassy they are.

[Esther]

Meaner. They're mean.

[Harry Jowsey]

I just need someone to yell at me sometimes.

[Esther]

Yeah. You have to get tough stuff.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Because they're so small, they have to make them themselves known.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

It's like, don't crush me. So I gotta be like, extra, like, you know?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. And I like feeling like I can.

[Esther]

I get that.

[Harry Jowsey]

You know, be a wall for someone. That's a good article. You should make with short people to fight climate.

[Host 1]

I wrote that article.

[Harry Jowsey]

Did you actually?

[Host 1]

No.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, no.

[Esther]

I'm like, why are you getting really.

[Harry Jowsey]

Good for this episode?

[Host 1]

We wrote a whole article for you.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wow.

[Host 1]

Have you ever actually had a proper Valentine's Day with a girlfriend? Like, what do you do?

[Harry Jowsey]

I actually took my ex, Georgia, to Hawaii and that was really nice.

[Host 1]

And like, for Valentine's Day?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Because I remember it was like, the first time I think I put in, like, effort with someone.

[Esther]

How did that feel to put an effort.

[Harry Jowsey]

Such a drag because my assistant booked everything, so I didn't really do anything. It was good. It was really good that we. We went and I remember I had, like, roses and stuff on the bed and all this stuff, like, set up, which is kind of useless on a vacation because, like, you just push it to the side. And then they were filming American Idol on the beach there, so we got to watch that. And then that was kind of it. But we had a really nice time. But that's the other time I've done something.

[Host 1]

A trip is a big gesture.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Oh, actually, here. Here's a thought. One of my friends, their friend is getting married on Valentine's Day. Do you think that's annoying or a good thing? I think it's so annoying.

[Esther]

I think if the date is special to them, like, oh, this is when we met or whatever, it makes sense. But this specific choose Valentine's Day is a little bit, like, too on the nose for me, and I. Yeah. It's too cheesy. Is Valentine's Day booking more expensive in general? Do they, like, hike up the prices for, like, wedding venues?

[Host 1]

Yeah, I. You know what else I don't like is, like, when you combine a holiday.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

With something else, it's like, you might as well spread out your holidays. Like, then you have no anniversary and a Valentine's Day.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. You have to do it two in one.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

And you're not going to get double the present months.

[Host 1]

And you're not gonna. It's not gonna be, like, double amazing every year.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Ew. That's what I thought. Like, oh, it's romantic. I'm like, it isn't. Like, pick a real date and make it romantic.

[Host 1]

It's like, don't you have a mind of your own?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

You think of your own date.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

To be special.

[Esther]

Harry, how does it feel to be labeled a fuckboy? Is it something that you. You take on with pride, or are you just kind of, like, repelled by the word?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, I think that it's, like, a very important part of my life because I think I did the first dating show I was on when I was 19, and I'm now this year I'm 29, so it'll be 10 years.

[Esther]

Oh, my God. And was that the first one in New Zealand?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, it's called Heartbreak Island. Oh, whoa. And so I guess when your dating life.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is kind of your career, and it has to be crazy for things, like move forward. That was just, like, the easiest thing to, like, fall into. And then going on to what they handle, and it's like, oh, these guys are sex freaks.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

It was a big part of it that I'm like, okay, it's fair enough that this is what we're going to be labeled as. But now I think in recent years, I like to believe I've been a lot better. And then, especially with my next show coming out, let's Marry Harry. That's definitely a nice transition to being a wholesome human.

[Esther]

And are you taking this seriously? Are you like, I am looking.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, it's done. It's already. Yeah, it was.

[Esther]

Oh, my goodness.

[Harry Jowsey]

Serious thing I've ever done in my life. Yeah. Why is she so Shocked. She did.

[Host 1]

Food.

[Harry Jowsey]

Someone get her a banana. I saw bananas up there.

[Esther]

Remember, Remember when, like, you know, back then, they were like, oh, you can make a hoe a housewife. Like, can there really be, like, a reformed, like, boy? And what does that look like?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, no chance. But we're trying. No, no, I think so. Because I. I feel like everyone has a bit of a hoe phase.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Mine was just on camera and. And I was. And I, like, enjoyed it a little bit too much. Yeah. But I think it's just. Yeah. After. Maybe you have a bad breakup, you go for a little freaky phase and then come out of it. Yeah. Mine was just a little bit extended.

[Host 1]

I'm friends with this influencer, Tinks. Do you know her?

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, I love Tinks.

[Host 1]

She's amazing. And she has this thing called Box theory. Have you heard of it? Okay, so it's like when you start anything with a guy, you guys go on a date, you meet whatever. You're immediately in one box. You're either in the hookup box or the girlfriend box. And there's. Once you're in the hookup box, she says you can never, ever progress with a guy out of the hookup box into the girlfriend box. Do you think that's true?

[Harry Jowsey]

No.

[Host 1]

Really?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Because I've hooked up with girls and then be like, oh, that could be my girlfriend.

[Esther]

Even when you first hook up with them, then you're not really putting her just in the hookup box. There's still a potential. She's asking you if you've hooked up with someone and just. Always has seen a girl as just a hookup.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, yeah.

[Esther]

Could she ever, like, a year or two later, been like. Be like, oh, this is the one.

[Harry Jowsey]

If she wins a lottery, for sure. Like, if I find out her dad's a billionaire, I'm like, that's wife right there. You know? Come on, let's be realistic. No, I think, yeah. If there's always someone you like, it's just always seen as sex. Like, for sure. It's always just gonna be like that. And that's really sad.

[Host 1]

Oh, no.

[Esther]

Because it's the opposite for girls. Because I feel like, you know, we don't. That box theory doesn't apply because now.

[Harry Jowsey]

I'm thinking about it. Yeah. There's been girls who have just, like, it's always been a hookup. And it's just stated that. But I've. No, I've definitely, like, slept with girls only the first night and be like, oh, this is the love of my Life. But then I'm realizing that I'm probably love bombing them because it never worked out.

[Esther]

Out.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, I'm also a problem.

[Host 1]

Wait, you were. You're a love bomber.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, it's so much fun. You should try it.

[Esther]

Can you try it with Dave today? Yeah, I will just love bomb the out of it.

[Harry Jowsey]

You should actually do it with your husband because it sounds like you hate him.

[Host 1]

I don't know. I'm sorry.

[Harry Jowsey]

Text him, I love you right now. Just for fun.

[Host 1]

No, I do love bomb him a lot, I feel like.

[Esther]

But only in public. It's. It's no formative love bomb, right?

[Host 1]

Sometimes, but. Okay. One thing that is so weird about us, this is that we both have such low self esteem. This is literally a conversation five times a week in our house. One of us is like, I'll be like, you look so hot today. And he's like, there's something wrong with you. And he'll say that, he's like, you're so beautiful pregnant. And I'm like, you're lying. Like, we never accept the compliments and we're always giving them. It's kind of crazy. I'm like, we don't believe in each other.

[Harry Jowsey]

That's really sad. Do we need to go to a counselor? Like, what's.

[Host 1]

You guys. Maybe your next show. You can be our couples counselor.

[Harry Jowsey]

If I'm your couples counselor, you have a lot of problems. I can't even get myself at a couple.

[Host 1]

Wait, so tell me about love bombing though. Like.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Are you. Do you know you're doing it when you're doing it?

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, I just love. I just get so excited sometimes.

[Esther]

So it. Does it feel like truly like a dopamine rush in your body and you're.

[Host 1]

Like, I love you.

[Esther]

I had to say it. No. Is it more of a strategic.

[Harry Jowsey]

Well, I'm not saying I love you. I'm like, hey, look at this AI photo of our kids.

[Host 1]

Really?

[Harry Jowsey]

It's so easy and fun to do that.

[Esther]

That is so wild and crazy.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, I'm like, I've done it at a party. Like, I've seen a beautiful girl. I'm. Look, this is what we could be.

[Esther]

And girls still fall for this. I feel like we've sniffed this out a long time ago. We know what a love bomber is. It still works.

[Harry Jowsey]

People know.

[Esther]

Okay, girls, let's get our shit together. We can't have a baby Harry strategy. Working on.

[Host 1]

What are you feeling when you're love bombing? Are you. It feels real.

[Harry Jowsey]

My problem is I'm just I'm so excited by love and being in a relationship and all that stuff. Like, I get so, like, worked up. Like, oh, my God. Like, this is everything. This person is perfect. And then. Then they're not. But, like, for like a week. And then I'm like, so pumped on them. This is cool.

[Esther]

So scary.

[Harry Jowsey]

And then they're, like, so terrifying. I'll see them, like, smoke a vape or something and I'm like, ah. Like, maybe. Maybe it isn't. Or they have stinky breath.

[Host 1]

This is.

[Esther]

The breathing is real for me, though. That. That is huge for me. That is, like, a real ick. And you are allowed to have icks.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Around breath.

[Harry Jowsey]

So it would. Honestly, it would be like, actual love, but. But because I always find it ick within a couple weeks. It's called love bombing. And, you know, that's not my definition.

[Host 1]

I love this because. No, because it's like, he's not. It's not a fraudulent act.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

He's just feeling the feelings.

[Harry Jowsey]

I wouldn't mean it if I don't believe you.

[Host 1]

I always thought love bombing was like, I'm faking it to, like, trick her.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

But he's like. Like, he's just like. His head is in the clouds.

[Esther]

Are. You're fully in it when you're in it, but it just lasts a week.

[Harry Jowsey]

And a half usually. But now we're reformed, so everything's fine.

[Esther]

We're reformed.

[Host 1]

How do you hold back, though?

[Harry Jowsey]

I don't.

[Host 1]

Okay.

[Esther]

Have you ever practiced restraint where you're like, you know what? This one. Let's take it slow, Harry. Let's, you know, let's.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And how does that usually work out where you're like, I'm not gonna show her the AI Baby.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, no, the. The AI Baby is just like a party trip trick.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

You know, just like, you see someone cute.

[Host 1]

That's different. Wow.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, the worst thing was I was, like, on chat GPT and I scrolled up, one too many swipes, and there was another baby with another girl. I'm actually, I. I'm deeply sorry. I don't know this woman. But I was just trying to test it before I did ours. Test the prompt. Yeah. I don't know. I just. I love it so much. Okay.

[Host 1]

Do you have a specific love language? Do I?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, I do.

[Host 1]

What do you think it is?

[Harry Jowsey]

I think they all kind of go in order maybe. But I feel like quality time is really important. But then on the other hand, I know this isn't a love language, but distance Is, like, really nice.

[Host 1]

That's a funny love language.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

The kind we'll add it. It'll make it a seven.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Six.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Because I think, like, quality time, words, affirmation. I'm learning to be good at that and, like, receive that. Because what I realize is I'm not very good at receiving love. I'm probably the same as you and your husband. Like. Like, you'd be like, oh, my God, I love you so much. Like, wow. Like, thank you so much. That's crazy.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

If someone were to match your love bomb right up top, like, right from the beginning does that.

[Harry Jowsey]

Like, she's gonna get pregnant day one. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. That's it. That's all I need. Or someone to be afraid of me. And then I'm like, if they kind of feel like, if they secretly hate me, I'm like, oh, this is the one.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's a nice challenge, but I feel like distance is a unspoken love language. Because if you can be away from someone and really miss them and want to be with them, that's kind of nice.

[Esther]

Looking like a true avoidant.

[Harry Jowsey]

I am, huh?

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

I don't know. Why am I, like, lining up with everything he says? Because I.

[Esther]

You know why? Your male gaze. You are. You are a man inside. I know you. And you know what the testosterone in your baby is, like, up you. It's poisoning your head. No, because really, I.

[Host 1]

When I meet a new girl, like, who's a friend, I love. Bomb her. You do? I do.

[Esther]

Oh, my God. The first night I met you was like, show me your tits. Let me touch your tits. It was, like, within five minutes of meeting her.

[Harry Jowsey]

Can I do that?

[Esther]

You guys are like, the same people.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wait, no. But why did girls show each other each other's tits?

[Host 1]

Wait.

[Esther]

I think some girls. And as, like, we. We too hard up front.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And then the danger in that is that usually there is a fallout at some point.

[Host 1]

True. But we have never had one.

[Esther]

No, we've never had one.

[Harry Jowsey]

Have you seen each other's tits?

[Esther]

Oh, yeah. Because I used to have implants.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And I woke up with the wrong size implants. I was like, hey, doctor, I want some. A modest season here. Woke up with double Ds. And I was like, what the. So I took them out, like, a year after.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wow.

[Host 1]

I was her doctor.

[Harry Jowsey]

How did he make that mistake?

[Esther]

He took artistic license. License? Yeah. He was just like, your thing. I can mold. And I think you're molded better this way. Because he probably looked at the Width of my swimmer shoulders. And he was like, let's offset that with some bigger.

[Harry Jowsey]

Can you sue?

[Esther]

Oh, no, no, I don't.

[Harry Jowsey]

Did he take him out for free?

[Esther]

I went to a different doctor to take him out because I didn't trust him at that point. And he was like, a very big, like, Beverly Hills doctor, too.

[Harry Jowsey]

Damn. This is crazy.

[Esther]

I know.

[Host 1]

Okay, here's what I like about the distance thing that Harry is bringing up. Because you never want to be that couple where you guys are, like, all the time on top of each other. You do everything together. You share everything with each other. Like, that's. We know. That's crash and burn failure. Right?

[Harry Jowsey]

That's love me.

[Host 1]

But when you're like, have your own separate lives and your own separate interests like that, to me, that's distance.

[Esther]

I don't think that's what he means. He means, like, geographically away.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, no, I mean, like. Yeah, what you were saying.

[Host 1]

Have you ever had a long distance relationship?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, all of them.

[Host 1]

Red flag. I'll.

[Esther]

Red flag. And that was a red flag for me. I only dated.

[Harry Jowsey]

That's the first one I've given today.

[Esther]

Yes.

[Harry Jowsey]

When you.

[Esther]

I only dated for when I was single. For most of my 20s, I only dated boys from different countries because of the distance. I knew that I could pop in, pop out whenever I please. One of them is Australian, and he was from Melbourne. And he, to this day, still wants to kill me so I can never visit Melbourne again.

[Harry Jowsey]

Whoa. What did you do? It was a double D tit. You just hit him.

[Esther]

I know. It just. It just didn't work out. He was just like, a little hot head.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Yeah. But long distance is, like, fake.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is it?

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's nice, though.

[Host 1]

It's like a fake fantasy relationship where you're just like, play pretend relationship.

[Esther]

You get the dopamine hit and then you let it wane, and then you get the big rush again. So you're kind of microdosing. Falling in love.

[Harry Jowsey]

I just feel like I'm so busy that it's, like, annoying to have someone, like, wait around all day. I'm like, I'd rather, like, plan that when they come that it's, like, fun and special instead of like, oh, you're up my bum all the time. And then, like, during the school night, like, I'm not. I don't want to talk to anyone. I just want to work.

[Host 1]

What about the. For me, the best part and like, the only reason to be in a relationship is, like, to go to bed together and wake up together. That's, like, so fun. Like a sleepover.

[Harry Jowsey]

That's the only reason?

[Host 1]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

You have a child in your stomach. No, it's not nice. But I fall asleep in, like, 10 seconds. I'm the worst. Especially if I'm gonna sleep apnea. I've got a lot of things. I think that's probably one of them.

[Esther]

Yeah. Because you fall asleep. If you go fall asleep too quickly, that's usually a red flag.

[Host 1]

It really. Me sleeping is.

[Harry Jowsey]

I can't even sleep.

[Esther]

You can't sleep? Not if you knock out that fast. No. No.

[Harry Jowsey]

But I just, like, I feel comfortable where I put some background, like a movie on, and then I'll try and watch it. And I'm out, like, because. Yeah, the bed is for sleeping.

[Host 1]

I'm so jealous of that because. Okay. You know how, like, the difference between men and women sexually, it's like, men can just go. And women, like, really need to be, like, revved up and turned on. That's how I am for sleep. Like, I need, like, foreplay for sleep. I need so many of the, like, circumstances to be perfect and right. And I feel like every guy I know, it's like getting a boner going to sleep.

[Harry Jowsey]

Especially after sex. Oh, my God. I can. I can't even talk.

[Esther]

No pillow talk. It's just lights out.

[Harry Jowsey]

Literally. It's the best. You guys just sound like haters because you're jealous.

[Host 1]

We are. I'm jealous.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Even on a plane. If I sit down on a plane, I'm done. And I wake up.

[Esther]

That I'm really envious of because I can never get comfortable on a plane. Unless it's a lie. Flat. Then, you know, how do you get comfortable on planes?

[Host 1]

You're so large.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Lean on everyone.

[Esther]

And you would think that because you're so big that you'd be uncomfortable on the plane, but I was on a flight to New York with Blake Griffith.

[Host 1]

Oh, yeah.

[Esther]

And he is. What? How tall? Six? I don't know.

[Harry Jowsey]

Six, seven, maybe.

[Esther]

He was out in 10 seconds like.

[Harry Jowsey]

You said, and he's in a big frame.

[Host 1]

Maybe, like, the tall guys are burning so much energy.

[Harry Jowsey]

Six? Nine.

[Esther]

Nine. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. We are burning so much energy that.

[Host 1]

You need the rest.

[Esther]

So you're saying short kings need.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

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[Host 1]

This episode is brought to you by IQ Bar, our exclusive snack, hydration and coffee sponsor. IQ Bar Protein Bars, IQ Mix, Hydration Mixes and IQ Joe Mushroom Coffees are the delicious low sugar brain and body fuel you need to win your day New Year. You know what that means? A clean slate. Okay. And it's time to actually have something in your purse that is real fuel and powering your day with an IQ Bar. All IQ Bar products are clean label certified entirely free from gluten, dairy, soy, GMOs and artificial ingredients. And the new year really does give us a chance to reset and maximize our brain and body's potential. And with IQ Bars, Protein bars, hydration mixes and mushroom coffee coffees, their Ultimate Sampler Pack includes all three. And this is such a great way to just hit the reset button. And right now IQ Bar is offering our special podcast listeners 20 off all IQ bar products including the Ultimate Sampler Pack plus free shipping. To get your 20 off, text trash to 64, 000. Text trash to 64, 000. That's trash to 64, 000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details. This episode is brought to you by IQ Bar, our exclusive snack, hydration and coffee sponsor. IQ Bar Protein Bars, IQ Mix, Hydration Mixes and IQ Joe Mushroom Coffees are the delicious low sugar brain and body fuel you need to win your day New Year. You know what that means? A clean slate. Okay? And it's time to actually have something in your purse that is really real fuel. Empowering your day with an IQ Bar. All IQ Bar products are clean label certified entirely free from gluten, dairy, soy GMOs and artificial ingredients. And the new year really does give us a chance to reset and maximize our brain and body's potential. And with IQ bars, protein bars, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees, their ultimate sampler pack includes all three. And this is such a great way to just hit the reset button. And right now, IQ Bar is offering our special podcast listeners 20 off all IQ Bar products, including the ultimate sampler pack, plus free shipping to get your 20% off. Text trash to 64,000. Text trash to 64,000. That's trash to 64,000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details. I feel like we have some questions from our audience for advice, right?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, we do.

[Host 1]

We have some dating advice. A few months ago, I caught my ex cheating on me with multiple people for over a year via his journal, which I call his diary. My question to you is, what is your go to way to get over someone? Especially betrayal. I know he sucks, but feelings don't have an off switch. So true.

[Esther]

So gross that he's journaling his cheating away, like, with his legs up, just like, dear diary, guess what? The I did today is so, like. It's an.

[Harry Jowsey]

I think that's my accent right there.

[Esther]

Do you journal?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, I'm afraid that someone will find it. Yes.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Like, what's wrong with this guy?

[Host 1]

You know that sometimes, like, I'll. Because I. I journal a lot. And, like, my husband will, like, come to town downstairs, where I'm just laying in bed rotting, journaling, and he'll pick up my journal and just start reading a random sentence. And it's like, so. It's so painful for me. And he just makes fun of me, but I kind of like it.

[Harry Jowsey]

You guys hate each other. Can you just, like, do eye gazing or something for five minutes?

[Esther]

I think.

[Host 1]

I think that short Jewish people are just really different from you. You're just like a tall Australian guy.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

You don't get us.

[Harry Jowsey]

Damn.

[Host 1]

We need a double date with us. And I. We need to, like, okay. See what's going on.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Because it's definitely me. Wait, what should she do, though?

[Host 1]

Oh, yeah.

[Esther]

Have you ever been cheated on?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, every day.

[Host 1]

Every day. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, I have. I. I have. But then I'm like, I wasn't very. It was, like, so long ago. I wasn't very good. So I was like, I'll just cheat back and then that double hurts.

[Host 1]

I would say that. Like, I know that, like, this person said, feelings don't have an off switch. And that is just the truest thing. And it always Just is a matter of time. But I will also add that I feel like one thing we've learned as a culture in a society is that the person who's cheating is the person who's hurting. Like, their seeking something that they don't have within them that they're trying to fill. You know, we used to think like, oh, he cheated on me, or she cheated on me. That means that, like, I'm ugly. But then, like, society has broken that wide open with, like, the Halle Berry incident and Natalie Portman was the big one.

[Esther]

Yeah. Cheat on.

[Host 1]

Yes. I think this was a couple years ago.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, wow.

[Host 1]

I just think that, like, I hope that it can help you just in any way if you can think, like, that person is. Is hurting and doing bad things and it has nothing to do with you.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

And like, you're the healthy, better one.

[Harry Jowsey]

And also his dad, that would get. That would really get him upset.

[Host 1]

Oh, I thought you meant, like, his dad. He raised him wrong.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, no. I mean, like, if you really want to hammer home.

[Esther]

Yeah, I think you're right. I think Esther Perel wrote a whole book about it, about just being like. It actually makes you understand why people cheat. And it's almost. Almost like, oh, you sad little thing. Like, it has nothing to do with me. But I. I'm not about the confrontation. I don't like a. I found this. I take my sweet time. I. I play it out for three, four months. If we're living together, I don't do a reveal. The reveal will be, that is.

[Host 1]

I'm done psychotic.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

That's more painful for you. You have to live with this sausage.

[Esther]

But only because it's like, especially if we're living together and our lives are, like, intertwined. I don't. I want to make sure that I get my in order and make sure that I have a place to stay. Make sure that, you know, my finances are in order before I'm like, you know, you. Peace out.

[Harry Jowsey]

Fair.

[Esther]

Right. I don't want to be like, just not have a plan in place. You.

[Host 1]

I don't have the kind of patience for that.

[Harry Jowsey]

Same. Yeah, see, I would just. I would end up snooping on their phone and trying to find everything. And then I would say, just do a tell all on TikTok. Look at his journal and then go through it. And then. And he's a little.

[Esther]

That's a really good thing. I feel like that may be a great exposure. Yeah. Like a multiple part story on TikTok.

[Harry Jowsey]

You want to pop off S. This is What?

[Esther]

This is the way to businessman right here.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. It really fucks your life up being on the receiving end, trust me.

[Host 1]

Happened to you?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

What happened?

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, she's like a four part series. But it was all good. Yeah, it was like warranted because I was like. I was being a bit of a dick too.

[Host 1]

What did you do?

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, it was just like a weird. We had a really bad breakup, me and my ex. Like, we're so good now. She actually came and was helping on this last show, which was awesome. Like, we're in a really good spot. But we had. We were like butting heads online and then she did a full part series. I was like, she kind of got me there.

[Host 1]

That's kind of cool.

[Harry Jowsey]

She kind of cooked.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. I was watching. I was like, she's good. Damn. I told her everything.

[Host 1]

Next question. Okay. I'm thinking of hooking up with my high school sweetheart after two decades. Decades. Leave that sweet memory in the past or explore it. Both of our lives are complicated and we live thousands of miles apart. High school sweetheart is coming back to LA for a week. Ish. We've both expressed interest. I'm just not sure if it'll be hot and fun or lame and take away from what was. What if one of us catches feelings? Probably me. I'm the sad girl. Question mark.

[Esther]

This is really Esther coded. Did you write this?

[Host 1]

Law is coming up. Up. Really a lot is coming up. And I do want to start by saying I do not want to hook up with my high school ex. I really don't. Maybe like if I'm like, no, there's no circumstance. But I did know someone once. He was older and it was someone that I worked with and his high school ex, he was probably like in his 50s. They had reconnected and like he would confide in me about it and we would talk about it and it was just, just like he was so happy. It was this beautiful thing. Like they were both just reminded of their youth in this way that felt so soothing to listen to. It felt so healing for them that I do feel like. Oh, that if that's like, if you're feeling. Could be so amazing.

[Esther]

It could, it could. I think it's sweet for me, I don't like to backpedal into old territory, like, ever. Really.

[Harry Jowsey]

I feel like I love spinning the book block.

[Esther]

Really?

[Harry Jowsey]

It's so fun.

[Esther]

Oh, I can, like, once I. If I'm out, it's usually because there's already like an, like an ick that happened and I can't see how I can't.

[Host 1]

Yeah, you really close the door on exit.

[Harry Jowsey]

How do you do that?

[Esther]

The door.

[Harry Jowsey]

How do you do that?

[Host 1]

They leave. Her exes leave it open, but she closes it.

[Esther]

Sometimes they'll drop that DM and I'm like, ship has sailed. Wow.

[Harry Jowsey]

How do you. I'm fold. Like, I literally like. Or me. They're like, oh, I'm. I'm bored. I want to see my. Okay, we shouldn't, though.

[Host 1]

Do you have, though, that, like, one high school person in mind?

[Harry Jowsey]

That was Annika.

[Host 1]

Okay.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yes. My ex from high school.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Well, actually, I don't know where she is now. She's probably very different, but she was, like, the hot girl at school, and we used to date, but I was a piece of. Yeah. Because I was, like, 16, and I thought I was the man, but I was built like a little asparagus.

[Host 1]

What if you're, like, in your 50s and you're like. Like, divorce?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, no, no, we're good. But I think, like, if it was something that I never, like, hooked up with and is that I would. I always just say, like, you just got to try it.

[Esther]

I do. I mean, if I. I don't think they're stopping the momentum of this anymore, because I will say my best friend married the guy that she. So in high school, my best friend and her and this guy lost their virgin and with each other. They dated briefly, but then went their separate ways in college. Twenty years later, they, you know, met up again, and now they have two kids.

[Host 1]

Wow.

[Esther]

And so maybe it does work.

[Host 1]

I love that. And I know no one is going to believe me when I say this, because I have been driving past my high school ex's house for the past, like, 20.

[Esther]

How do you feel about that, Harry?

[Harry Jowsey]

Why? You're just, like, curious. Sorry.

[Host 1]

I'm just driving past. I'm not doing anything.

[Harry Jowsey]

Why?

[Host 1]

I don't know. It's like.

[Harry Jowsey]

And you're saying it publicly?

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

What are you doing privately? Wait, what? You just. You go drive past this place just.

[Host 1]

To see when I'm in town, new car. Just, like, what's going on in the driveway?

[Harry Jowsey]

What's going on?

[Host 1]

Windows? No, it's. It. It's in my hometown. Whenever I go home, my parents usually drive me past.

[Harry Jowsey]

What does your husband think? You guys hate each other. So does.

[Host 1]

No, he's just, like, rolls his eyes and, like, doesn't.

[Harry Jowsey]

He's in the car, too?

[Host 1]

No, no. I think maybe.

[Harry Jowsey]

What's going.

[Esther]

What's going on in the driveway?

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, you Got a new car.

[Esther]

Babe, look.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's so exciting. Look, there's kids.

[Host 1]

He just thinks I'm crazy. Like, whatever. He. It just rolls off of him. But I. Even though I do that, I still want to be very clear that the thought of hooking up with him is repulsive to me.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

And I know no one believes me.

[Esther]

I believe you.

[Host 1]

You do?

[Esther]

Yeah. You really do? Believe.

[Host 1]

Why?

[Esther]

Because I do understand, like, wanting to, like, fuck a memory but not fuck the person.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

The memory itself lives in your heart. Heart somewhere. And you're, like, thrilled by it, but the actual person is just a person who's already evolved into someone you don't want to.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

So, like, I. Memories in my head all the time. Like that Australian guy.

[Harry Jowsey]

You. Him.

[Esther]

The memory. I could not him today.

[Host 1]

Maybe then we're, like, getting to an answer for this girl, which is, like, maybe it's possible that she does just want to. The memory.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

And not the person. And maybe if she meets up with him.

[Esther]

Him.

[Host 1]

I would, like, say meet up in a public situation where you can't just automatically hook up. So you can, like, meet. Assess it, think about it, revisit. I don't know.

[Esther]

I feel like you'd go for it.

[Harry Jowsey]

I just go for it. Like, worst case that can happen, you get a little bit of sausage. Best case, you come and everyone's happy. You can have a child and happily ever after.

[Esther]

I wish I lived my life like that. What's the worst that could happen? I can have a little sausage.

[Host 1]

Good. Like, on pizza or.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Just like. That's why I never truly had, like, a huge hoe phase, because it was never just, like, I could use a little sausage tonight. I was always just, like, overthinking.

[Harry Jowsey]

I'm like, wow, you're just gonna live.

[Host 1]

No, that.

[Harry Jowsey]

No.

[Host 1]

He's a 65 Australian man. We can't.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

I can't take on that. That's different strategy. Yeah.

[Host 1]

We're not the same species as this person.

[Harry Jowsey]

I'm right here in the room with us. We have a lizard.

[Host 1]

But I swear, I'm really affected by the. That couple that I. That man that I knew that was hooking up with his high school sweetheart. Like, that was cool. Like, I really lived vicariously through that for, like, a few months. And it was really beautiful, like, the way that you're just like, oh, my God. He's, like, really getting in touch with his younger self through this experience. And, you know, that's like, my dream is to be in high school again. So I Just love. I don't know.

[Esther]

I wanted to ask your opinion on this. So Esther has a theory that fuckboys love single moms and always end up with single moms and. Esther, do you want to.

[Host 1]

Okay.

[Harry Jowsey]

Sorry. Yeah. I love them so much.

[Host 1]

Wait, really?

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Why?

[Harry Jowsey]

I don't know. Okay, so I think that like single moms, they're great.

[Host 1]

I think that men who like serial date or whatever, like, they hook up, they never want to settle down. They end up. If they do end up settling down, they end up settling down with a single mom because they're kind of like a man child. And then they see this woman and she's like taking care of this, this like six year old kid or whatever and they're like, oh, that looks really good. Like she can like get that baby dressed and like feed it and provide for it. And then the man starts to go, oh, maybe she can do that for me. And like, I think that you have this like instant. This is literally my dad, he did this because my mom was a single mom when he met her. And he was worked out though. No, totally. He was never gonna get married. He was never gonna have kids. But then I feel like he just saw my mom and was like, I'm done eating off paper plates. Like, I want this mommy to move in and take care of me. And that's what happened.

[Harry Jowsey]

Look, I think different strokes are different.

[Host 1]

What is your, what is your view?

[Harry Jowsey]

I just think single moms are so sexy and fun.

[Host 1]

Why?

[Harry Jowsey]

I just love moms.

[Host 1]

Like, why?

[Harry Jowsey]

You know, they have a responsibility.

[Esther]

Uh huh. Okay.

[Harry Jowsey]

You know, there's a lot on the plate and they're getting shit done. I don't know. Like I just. Not even, just. This is gonna sound terrible, but like just seeing my sisters and how much, how empowered they were when they had their kids and how incredible that was, was really inspiring.

[Host 1]

Yeah, he's explaining it better than me.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. But so then when I, like when I was dating, I've dated a few.

[Host 1]

Moms, they have their own lives.

[Harry Jowsey]

I think little things don't matter.

[Esther]

I think that's what it is too. They really. You're not number one.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

You'll never be number one. It's kind of like, like I need to kind of straighten up a little bit. I need to really behave because I'm. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

And also it's like, I think people who either don't have kids or a job or hobbies just want to fight all the time. That's my theory. They just want to argue. So then you have like these influences who just take selfies and don't have any responsibilities like me. And all they want to do is argue with each other. So maybe that's why, why I love people with responsibilities. Cuz, like, they don't want to fight. They just want to have fun.

[Host 1]

No, fully, I think you're right. And I also, I can speak for myself. Like, I feel like if you dated me before I had kids, I was crazy and I was immature and I had no responsibilities and I didn't know how to like, feed a someone a dinner. And then the difference then when you have a kid, it's like, oh, this is. I'm like such a better partner. I. I'm. My kid is my world. I take care of them. I'm also able to. I just have more love to share. And I'm like, I just feel that I've changed so much that. Yeah. I don't know. I think like, people historically have given single moms a bad rap, but I'm like, no, I think that's like, where it's at for a lot of men.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

I will say also, like, from the hookup side, like, single moms know exactly what they want. Like they're not around, you know, like, they get to the point and.

[Esther]

Yeah, no, if I, for some reason I were to break up with my partner today, I would be the cunt, naughtyist person to date. And I think that's probably what you're magnetized to is that extra bitchiness, that sass.

[Harry Jowsey]

I love it so much.

[Esther]

Yeah, it makes sense.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, it's good. It's like a little bit of sass. Yeah. I don't know if they love you. I hate you.

[Host 1]

The Valentine banana today so much.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wait, can you guys explain this?

[Host 1]

So on our show, usually we talk about, like, we can really get into some serious and like, emotions can get high. People can fight. Cly will talk about being molested. Like, there's just. You never know what's going to happen.

[Esther]

Lots of trauma.

[Host 1]

So we have a potassium break. But today we're kind of just chill.

[Harry Jowsey]

You know, you need to eat that.

[Esther]

She does. Yeah. I want to see how you open your banana. I don't even care if you eat it or not. I just need to see. Thank God.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is that okay? You said not be able to open.

[Esther]

Them because men usually, what do they do?

[Host 1]

They go.

[Esther]

They mansplain.

[Host 1]

And you're like, you.

[Esther]

You don't know. This is how the apes do it. And they open it from here. And I think Joe Rogan Said it one time. And now all the bros are like, you're opening your banana rod. I'm like, shut the up. I'm the ultimate banana eater. I eat six a day. Don't tell me to open a banana.

[Harry Jowsey]

Okay. I'm scared of you.

[Esther]

Is that. Rip it.

[Host 1]

You're scared everywhere you look. Here.

[Harry Jowsey]

I'm so scared. You're not eating yours. You've been hungry.

[Host 1]

No, I don't want it right now.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is this a note? What's on the note? Oh, yeah.

[Host 1]

What? Ours. We don't usually get notes. This is for the holiday from Ellie. Oh, so cute. Mine's from Megan. Megan's my Valentine guy.

[Esther]

And Ariel, thank you so much.

[Host 1]

This is the best part of Valentine's Day. These memories to me. Going to Walgreens, picking out your little cards, filling them out, that is. I'm gonna do that. I'm doing that this year.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yep.

[Host 1]

I'm getting little cards and I'm just hoarding them for myself. I don't want to give them to anyone.

[Esther]

What do you do for Valentine's?

[Host 1]

Well, I don't go out.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, her and her husband fight each other.

[Host 1]

No.

[Harry Jowsey]

And they don't eat.

[Esther]

Just box in the backyard.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Just give them five compliments. Just write it down and do something.

[Host 1]

This year I'm going to be, like, moments away from giving birth. So I will be miserable.

[Harry Jowsey]

What do you all feel about Galentine's Day? What's a Galentine Valentine's Day?

[Host 1]

That's, like, for gays? No, it's like, girls, gals.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, gays get their own Valentine's Day. When you get together, I gotta switch teams.

[Host 1]

I can't imagine a group of guys getting together on Valentine's Day. Is that something that you've done?

[Harry Jowsey]

I've never done that, but this could be the year.

[Host 1]

It sounds fun.

[Harry Jowsey]

We're. We're all doing it.

[Host 1]

Maybe it could be, like, super bowl themed. Because it's around the Super Bowl.

[Esther]

Oh, yeah. You're into sports now?

[Host 1]

Yeah, I like sports.

[Harry Jowsey]

What's wrong?

[Esther]

I'm telling you, she's got a little testosterone.

[Host 1]

No. Whenever it gets to the end of, like, the season.

[Esther]

Season.

[Host 1]

Like, in there. It's like in the finals. That's fun.

[Harry Jowsey]

Okay.

[Host 1]

Especially because if Dave is invested and he'll, like, teach. This year, the Patriots are in it, and that's, like, his team. Oh, that's right. So, you know, it can be a little. Do you like sports?

[Harry Jowsey]

Just rugby.

[Host 1]

What's that?

[Harry Jowsey]

It's, like, more aggressive and, like a quicker game. And it's like, fun.

[Esther]

But footy is also a big thing, right?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm part owner in the LA rugby team, so.

[Esther]

Oh, nice.

[Harry Jowsey]

Go to all the games.

[Esther]

Rugby's great.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's the most fun. But, like, NFL and I got in trouble for this. It just takes forever. Like, it's guys, like, three hours.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Does no one have a job? Like, are we all unemployed that we can afford three hours to sit here and watch this?

[Host 1]

No, I know.

[Harry Jowsey]

Like, give me a break. And then there's one team that's offense and another team that's defenseless. I'm like, what do we. Like, this is unnecessary. Just stay on the field, like, and then special teams for a kicker and they can cancel me for that. But I legitimately. It drives me crazy because I'm like, there's so much unnecessary spending here.

[Host 1]

What about basketball?

[Harry Jowsey]

Like, I can't be around them because they're all tall and that's my thing. And you're tall and athletic and rich. Get out of my face.

[Host 1]

Right?

[Harry Jowsey]

I'll never talk to Blake.

[Host 1]

I love that.

[Esther]

I need the competition.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

But I get what you're saying with NFL because it's like, the rosters are like an 80 man team. It's like, how many people.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Do we need double the budget for each person and watch them run and outperform everyone. Like, you give me $250 million a year. I'm crushing everything. I'm terrible. But I'll be on steroids with.

[Esther]

With my son. I. No NFL at all. If he ever becomes like, a. A sports dude, it's gonna be baseball only.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wow.

[Esther]

Rugby is good. Basketball. Things that have good contracts.

[Host 1]

This is a legitimate concern for you.

[Harry Jowsey]

Golf. You do golf?

[Host 1]

Golf. Her baby daddy looks like a football player.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Like, she's made a big child. My son. He's not gonna.

[Esther]

You never know. You never know.

[Host 1]

You don't know. I don't think so.

[Harry Jowsey]

You could. You could be a jockey.

[Esther]

Oh, my God. Jockeys are so rich.

[Harry Jowsey]

Are they.

[Esther]

They are very, very rich.

[Harry Jowsey]

And you can afford to be little.

[Host 1]

Guys. Guys. Don't manifest this for me. Don't listen. Yeah, I have. I do have a sports fact that is probably, like, everyone knows this, but I just want to share because it is so exc. Exciting. Did you guys know that the first year that Tom Brady was the quarterback, he was like, the understudy.

[Harry Jowsey]

Understudy.

[Host 1]

He was like the backup. The backup.

[Esther]

Bledsoe.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh. I'm like. Well, he wasn't studying.

[Host 1]

No, no. Like, understudying. A play where it's like, if you're sick, then the understudy goes on.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, and he was that good.

[Host 1]

But he. No, the guy, Drew Bludso. He was injured, and then he.

[Esther]

So the.

[Host 1]

The understudy had to step in. Tom Brady wasn't even the first pick. He was the second pick. And then he became the star. And then when Drew came back and was like, I'm ready. The coach, Jordan. Whatever. His boyfriend.

[Esther]

Jordan's boyfriend is what we'll call him.

[Host 1]

Yeah. The coach was like, actually, Jordan's boyfriend, Billy.

[Esther]

Billy Belichick.

[Host 1]

He was like, no, I'm sticking with Tom.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Did you know this?

[Esther]

Yeah, I do. I know enough sports facts like that. Okay. You know?

[Host 1]

Well, he didn't know.

[Harry Jowsey]

I have no idea. I don't know.

[Host 1]

Yeah, but I knew something that he didn't know.

[Esther]

So American. Like, I don't think people realize that it's just not necessarily a thing anywhere. Anywhere else. Because, like, for example, like, soccer, football, like, that's worldwide. Everyone knows, like, the Premier League teams. Everyone knows. Knows, you know, cricket. Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Cricket's big, too.

[Esther]

Cricket's huge. But the NFL is very. Just American, for sure is basketball and baseball, and that's everywhere. Yeah, Baseball is more American. We don't really. But basketball is huge. Soccer is huge. It's more like universe. The Asian countries love baseball, though.

[Harry Jowsey]

They love it. Huge on baseball.

[Esther]

Yeah. Koreans. And Japan. Yeah, Japan.

[Host 1]

I love an underdog story. I love when an understudy steps in and then takes it off.

[Harry Jowsey]

Did you guys see how Tom Brady looked when he was a rookie? He's, like, way different than what he looks like now. Yeah, you can see this. Wa. Facelift surgeries. Yeah.

[Host 1]

Wait, will you show us?

[Harry Jowsey]

W. No way. I'll get a facelift. Tom Brady's doing it. Oh. I was actually in a clinic the other day, and they were saying that people get their facelifts. Their hairline moves like, like, down their neck, so they have to get, like, hair removal. I don't know.

[Esther]

Oh, really?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Cuz they, like, full, like. Whoa.

[Host 1]

Wow. What did he do? That is different. He's very dorky. Here.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's before the money.

[Host 1]

What did he do? Do we know? Can you tell?

[Esther]

He bungled Giselle and now he's dating Alex Earl. Right?

[Host 1]

Is he?

[Esther]

I don't know. Brush up.

[Harry Jowsey]

We were hoping to get your guys's, like, greatest idea for a date on Valentine's Day.

[Host 1]

Our ideas. Oh, Lord.

[Harry Jowsey]

Go paint.

[Esther]

Painting, like a sip and wine. Sorry, not sip and wine.

[Harry Jowsey]

Do you Just want to get drunk. Wine and shots. No. Yeah. Sipping papers. Or just, like, something where you're, like, doing activity, like building a clay pot or something. Could be fun.

[Host 1]

Playing maybe a game of Scrabble.

[Harry Jowsey]

You and your husband need to do that. So you guys love each other? No. No. I don't know. Like, I feel like that's the best date is, like, when you're doing activity together and it's not like a interrogation. It's like, oh, we can just.

[Host 1]

You're very used to being interrogated.

[Harry Jowsey]

I am. Yeah. Especially after. Let's marry Harry. Like, after we film that. I'm like, this is intense.

[Host 1]

When does that come out?

[Harry Jowsey]

Tomorrow.

[Host 1]

Wait, really?

[Esther]

What's the. What's the. What's the premise?

[Harry Jowsey]

I have to get married.

[Esther]

Is it like Genu? Like, you're really looking.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Wow.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Do you want babies?

[Harry Jowsey]

All of them.

[Host 1]

How many? Many.

[Harry Jowsey]

As many as I'm able to get.

[Host 1]

That's how I feel.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. But it's. I feel like it's not really on me because I just. I got the easy job, right?

[Host 1]

It is.

[Harry Jowsey]

Just fill up the tank, you know, and then let the car go for a drive.

[Esther]

It's true.

[Harry Jowsey]

I don't know why I said that. Yeah. You guys, like, it's. It's easy, but, like. And. But we just have to, like, run in and, like, throw chocolate at you and then.

[Host 1]

And then hide away for date ideas. I do think an activity or a game. Game. This year, on our anniversary, we took a cooking class, and that was really fun and felt, like, romantic. I do think, like, this. Just going out to a nice dinner. There's nothing wrong with it, but it's always tricky on a holiday. Things never, you know, the service is stressful and parking is harder.

[Esther]

Dinner is boring. Dinner, movie, whatever the that is. It's so boring to me. But also, like, I'm very anti, like, real physical stuff on an early on a first couple days. Like, hiking is a big.

[Harry Jowsey]

No. No, I think hiking is more like a friend thing.

[Host 1]

Yeah. Yeah, I agree.

[Harry Jowsey]

Like, we're gonna go for, like. Come on.

[Esther]

I know.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. It's more like. Or like if you've been together for a while, where it's like, hey, let's go do this. But not like, for a date. I would never be like, hey, you want to come to Runyon?

[Host 1]

That is a horrible date idea. Actually.

[Esther]

People do that.

[Host 1]

I know. It's weird. It's like, I feel like it's like LA culture or something. It's like, weird.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Esther]

One of the first dates. The second date I went on with my partner now was on a hike, bro. And it was to Coco head in Hoyt. The steepest stairs ever. By the time I got to the top, the moon. The moon was up. We could see the reflection on the ocean. Everything was so perfectly picturesque. But I had foam at the side of my mouth because I was fighting for my life. And he was probably expecting a first kiss, but I was like, no, not like this. I'm passing away.

[Harry Jowsey]

That is a helicopter.

[Host 1]

Horrible.

[Esther]

Oh, cute.

[Harry Jowsey]

That would be nice. Yeah. That's fun. Yeah. I don't like the physical stuff. You're right. I think you win.

[Esther]

Yeah, It's a little too much.

[Host 1]

Well, so then, what are your Valentine's Day ideas, guys?

[Harry Jowsey]

Let's go to Bora Bora.

[Host 1]

He's a real traveler. Yeah, you're a high roller.

[Esther]

I think that, that. That kind of speaks to me a little bit. I like the tropics. If you're like, hey, let's go. Let's go to Bora Bora. Let's snorkel.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, I want to look at fish.

[Host 1]

You guys are being crazy. Valentine's Day is not. Not a trip holiday. That's crazy. Like, Valentine's Day is one night out of the week.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. Let's go to the Maldives.

[Esther]

Even better. Better diving.

[Harry Jowsey]

Or Jamaica. Like, let's do it all.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

You guys are being like, crazy babies. It's. It's gotta be like, let's think about an adult idea. Okay. Little children, you're dreaming too big.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wow. Really?

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Ladies, have some standards for yourself. You may as well take you to Bora Bora for Valentine's Day, Say he hates you.

[Host 1]

And I get what you're saying. Like, yes, dinner in a movie is. It can't be boring. But I don't. I wouldn't knock it just because I'm saying I don't want to do it on Valentine's Day. Like, dinner in a movie is the classic for a reason. It's for who? Me and my parents.

[Esther]

Yeah. Movie. You're not talking. You're not engaging. You're not doing anything but, like, staring at a screen. That's.

[Host 1]

But it can be fun to talk about the movie after if you're in.

[Esther]

High school and you're making out in the back.

[Host 1]

That's cute.

[Harry Jowsey]

Do you miss your high school sweetheart? No.

[Host 1]

Stop accusing me of that.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

No.

[Harry Jowsey]

Like, what. What's going on?

[Host 1]

For me, dinner in a movie is, like, for every Friday night. I would do that with my parents in high school. And I felt like that was really fun.

[Harry Jowsey]

That's nice.

[Host 1]

But I am a loser. So I think board games, cooking together.

[Harry Jowsey]

Cooking. No, it's stressful. Someone's gonna get stabbed.

[Esther]

Yeah, I'm out of ideas. I'm sorry. I'm not a Valentine's girl.

[Harry Jowsey]

Well, go adopt a dog.

[Host 1]

Adopt a dog.

[Esther]

Adopt? Yes.

[Host 1]

That's cute.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, go. Go adopt.

[Host 1]

Okay. What are things you would do with your friends on Valentine's Day?

[Esther]

Bedrot. That's like my dream, right?

[Harry Jowsey]

People's houses.

[Host 1]

Arm wrestle.

[Esther]

Yeah. Just be with your friends and do nothing and just stare into the void.

[Host 1]

No, you need a craft. Like a puzzle.

[Esther]

Overrated. Let's just like, sit in silence and Bedrot.

[Host 1]

Maybe, like, get some resin out.

[Harry Jowsey]

Wrestled each other. Sign up for my show.

[Host 1]

What do you do? You hang out with guys?

[Harry Jowsey]

Nah, I don't need to hang out with anyone.

[Host 1]

Really.

[Esther]

We're your best friends.

[Host 1]

Us.

[Esther]

Do you have.

[Harry Jowsey]

You guys better be. No, my are in, like, different cities, so I kind of just like, hang out alone, which is really sad. But I just like, work out and hang out and work.

[Esther]

No, I get that. I'm kind of a lone wolf.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah. And I have two dogs, so, like, I'm busy.

[Host 1]

Wait, you live in la, right?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

What do you have for dinner?

[Harry Jowsey]

Usually you need to have some food.

[Host 1]

No, you need to answer, like, what.

[Harry Jowsey]

Do you want me to order? You.

[Host 1]

You need to.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's lunch time. It's all good.

[Host 1]

Avoiding the question. I want to know what you eat.

[Harry Jowsey]

I got a chef, so whatever she makes.

[Host 1]

Really? Like, what kind of dinners do you like?

[Harry Jowsey]

Chicken? I don't know. I'm apparently got bad cholesterol, so I'm trying to figure that out.

[Host 1]

Me? Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

I did like one of those full body scans and all the blood tests, and they're like, oh, your cholesterol and your heart's, like, kind of funky. And I'm like, first off, shut the up. You have no idea what you're talking about. I feel great and my heart is healed. But no. Yeah, apparently. So I've just gotta. I've just been trying to figure that out. So I've been having to ease up, ease up on the Burger King.

[Host 1]

Coffee every day, every.

[Harry Jowsey]

Every 10 seconds.

[Host 1]

Do you. Do you make it or do you have a cafe you like?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, I make. Make it.

[Host 1]

What do you make?

[Harry Jowsey]

I don't know. Nespresso. Put the pot in and just. I'm useless. Okay. If it. I really don't care. She's like, black. I'm disgusting.

[Host 1]

He's Such a man.

[Harry Jowsey]

Is that okay? I'm six five.

[Esther]

The inside of your home, is it like, designed or is it like, do you have a headboard?

[Harry Jowsey]

I'm actually in the middle of moving right now, so it's like a mess. But I have an interior designer because I can't think. I just like, let her. Emily. Thank you. Maybe I'm just the worst. I just want to think about, like, I just want to walk into a home. Home and it's already done. And then I just don't have that thing, like the art. Like, I don't want to have any artistic flare at all.

[Host 1]

I'm the. We are the same person.

[Harry Jowsey]

We are. We're in love.

[Host 1]

I think you are. I'm like, okay, I want to end on, like, some advice from you. I want to. Yes. You know, the dating scene is rough, grim. I look at my single friends and I'm like, they're literally beautiful. They're literally successful. Like, they're so much fun. And what is your advice to girls who are single? Like, just from the guy's perspective, do you have. Maybe there's nothing. I don't know. But do you have any for girls.

[Esther]

Really looking for a relationship?

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Long term partnership.

[Harry Jowsey]

First off, men ain't just. Let's start there. I think happiness is the most attractive thing on anyone and it's the most attractive thing in yourself. So I think if you're worrying about a guy or worrying about a relationship, you're going to push it further way. Focus on being happy and loving yourself and that will happen. Like, I. Even if you're at the club, right. If you're out with your friends and you look, someone's smiling and having a good time, instantly you're like, oh, I want to be around that person. Like, I want to go over there. Think of it like that a relationship should be like, I want to be. I want to see the person having fun and having a good time, and I want to see that person who's yourself. Be confident, happy, and having a good time and the right people will get come around.

[Host 1]

That was good.

[Esther]

That was really good advice.

[Harry Jowsey]

So much.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Anytime you start with men ain't. I'm listening.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, that's. That's kind of the. The go to. You and your husband need to get happy.

[Host 1]

Oh, my God. You got.

[Harry Jowsey]

You need to eat. I need to tell a joke. Do some soul gazing for Valentine's Day. You guys have to write five compliments to each other.

[Esther]

You know what soul gazing is, Esther?

[Host 1]

No, I don't like how it sounds?

[Harry Jowsey]

No, you just like staring each other's eyes for like five minutes.

[Esther]

Oh, have you done that with anyone?

[Harry Jowsey]

It's really intense.

[Esther]

It's really intense. It's like really crazy. Like, I start crying within the first 30 seconds.

[Host 1]

You do?

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Who do you do it with?

[Esther]

I've done it with a stranger. I did this one. I went to like a. An art show where one of the art was basically like people doing these like, psychological experiments with each other. And one of it was a soul gazing and I soul gaze into a stranger and we both like, burst into.

[Harry Jowsey]

It's wild.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Are you serious?

[Harry Jowsey]

I did on a show.

[Host 1]

What happened?

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, I was like, oh, my God. I feel like I know you. And she's like, you know.

[Esther]

All right.

[Harry Jowsey]

You're a bitch. Yeah. I was like, that's what I figured out. By the way. Yeah, you suck. But it's. It's fascinating. You really like John, Try it.

[Host 1]

Okay.

[Harry Jowsey]

No, come close, Come close. You have to like staring.

[Host 1]

So then you'll know that I have bad breath.

[Harry Jowsey]

Oh, really?

[Esther]

And you'll only last a week and.

[Harry Jowsey]

A half, but you have to do like five minutes.

[Host 1]

Oh, my God. I can't. Oh, my God.

[Harry Jowsey]

You can't. It's scary, but you have to be like, close.

[Host 1]

I can't do it.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, we'll kiss.

[Host 1]

It's. We'll kiss. You won't like how the kiss tastes anyways. Where do we find more of you now that we're addicted?

[Harry Jowsey]

Text me. Drive past my house. Seeing as you love to do that. Don't. Don't do that. If you want to find me, it's at Harry. Jazzy also got a podcast called Boyfriend.

[Host 1]

Material and also he's in the wrong Paris with Miranda. Okay, Harry. Well, thank you. Will you be our best friend?

[Harry Jowsey]

Yeah, please.

[Host 1]

We take us out for coffee in Brisbane.

[Harry Jowsey]

No.

[Host 1]

And thank you to our slugs. We love you guys. We're gonna take some of this conversation over to the Patreon, so if you'll join us there. And if not, we'll see you next week with a brand new episode.

[Harry Jowsey]

Yay. I love slugs. Let's say cute.

[Host 1]

Support is available 247 with VRBoCare. We're here day or night, ready whenever you need help because a great trip starts with the right support.