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Kathy Griffin
Kathy, where are you at with your love life?
Have you seen 64 year old straight guys? It's not too good. They all have Bell's palsy. They just don't know it. What are the chances that I'm gonna like go on Raya? What am I gonna do? David Spade, I mean, when I saw his picture on Raya, I almost called him and I was like, David, you are hanging out with Kid Rock way too much.
Unknown
We love you, David.
Kathy Griffin
I love David Spade. He's one of the funniest people I've ever hung out with. Like, if you're gonna go to dinner with someone hilarious, go with David's favorite.
What have we done?
Unknown
We have launched a Patreon.
Kathy Griffin
I'm having so much fun.
Unknown
We're doing episodes every week. There's. It's a completely different show in my mind. Like, it's such a different vibe.
Kathy Griffin
It's me and you in bed mostly.
Unknown
And I feel like we got places on this most recent Patreon episode. Now there's three full bonus episodes up there that you'll get instant access to just at the five dollar tier. And all of the proceeds that we make are going to the victims. I don't want to call them victims.
Kathy Griffin
But people who lost my neighbors, my neighbors have lost their homes in the Altadena fires.
Unknown
We have a couple of huge topics coming up too that we're going to do, dives into that I'm really looking forward to. And we'll see you guys there at the Patreon. There's a link.
Kathy Griffin
Below is our secret space for our slugs.
Unknown
Shout out to our golden sluggies. Mary, Thomas, Kia, Anthony, Ron, Chrysantha and Arielle. Thank you so much for your support. Start your initial free online visit today at. For hers.com/trash Tuesday, that's F-O-R-H-E-R-S.com Trash Tuesday for your personalized weight loss treatment options. For hers.com Trash Tuesday hers weight loss is not available every where. Compounded products are not FDA approved or verified for safety, effectiveness or quality. Prescription required restrictions apply. We go Venus Epic are not compounded. Actual price depends on product and plan purchased. Welcome back, Kathy Griffin.
Kathy Griffin
I'm so excited to be back with you ladies.
Unknown
Favorite, fan favorite, fan favorite.
Kathy Griffin
There's nothing we can't talk about.
Unknown
That's what's so beautiful.
Kathy Griffin
And you helped push my tour. The Kathy Griffin My life on the PTSD list tour, which went from 40 cities to 75.
Oh my God.
Last weekend I played Boston Symphony Hall. Like I'm the symphony or something.
Unknown
Look at her. She's all the whole symphony in a five foot three body.
Kathy Griffin
That's right. Now, I also should tell you that I. I'm not saying I'm overweight. I'm not one of those. But I have not stopped eating since election night. And I had to buy these insanely expensive Victoria Beckham jeans in three different sizes.
Unknown
Wait, how much were those? I need to.
Kathy Griffin
Are you ready? I've never spent this much on a pair of jeans in my life. $524 for one pair of jeans. But they do give you a hand job directly from Victoria or David. You get. You know, he goes. He's.
I watched that documentary.
I had to have the pants after watching. That's. That's how shallow I am. I watched the documentary, and so I was like, I want those jeans.
Do you realize how much that woman has had to endure throughout his career? Just by the way, aside from the fact that she's a freaking pop star girl, the fact that she had to go through what she went through with from always the fall always took the.
Fall, and she was like the kooky one and he was the sane one, and, you know, he's no walk in the park. He's gorgeous, but he's no walk in the park. And I love her.
Unknown
I didn't know she had jeans. And I want to rip them off your body.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah. For my own, they're so. Yeah. So I got them in three sizes. I tried to put on the smallest size, and my wasn't having it. My pussy was like, meow. I ran the street.
Wait, does your pussy change sizes throughout the week?
Throughout the day. It's either plump, medium plump, or deflated. It's like a football. It's like a Super Bowl. Like the, like, deflate gate.
Is this another thing they don't tell you about getting older?
Oh, the pussy stuff is. Is unreal now here. So I was floating the topic with the ladies, which I feel that it's my duty as your aunt to tell you the stuff that nobody will tell you about getting older.
Okay?
So one of them is, I very nervous to come here today without my toupee, because I actually have a toupee. You do? I have a. I have a fake bangs. I have extensions that, you know, clip in. I have a toupee, which you're supposed to call a topper, but who are we shitting? It's a toupee. And then, of course, I have full wigs. So I call those Big Kathy. And then the toupee is Little Kathy. Because I started. I have plenty of hair. Shoot. This is all my hair, but, like, bald spots here and here. So I had to spray here. Touch my hair.
I feel the hairspray.
It's crusty. And I use some old school drag queen hairspray because otherwise I have, like, one section of bangs, and then there's, like, two blank spaces here.
Boy, have I got the gift for you.
What?
Thankfully for you, I have a hair care brand.
What I want to know seriously now, is it gonna help me with my bald spots?
Honestly, Triad is the best detangler like, I've ever used.
All right, I'm going to take. And it's good for your tepe on display for the.
Use it on your wigs. Use it on your toupee. Use it on anything on your pubes.
My pubes. What's left of them.
You know what I mean?
What's left of them. I can count them at this point.
Me too. Wait, can I show you?
Wait.
No, I don't.
Anytime. I stopped waxing because I got so sensitive that I was convinced that it was going to start to actually take my pussy off. Like, I thought there's going to be a missing pussy, and then am I going to feel silly because I paid some chick to wax it right off?
Wait, I can relate to this. I literally have three. Three hairs on my.
Yeah.
Unknown
Because I cannot relate to any of this.
Kathy Griffin
Waxing hurts. I think all men should have to get their balls waxed once. Once in a lifetime. And I mean that hard rip where they just. Boom. Rip it off.
Or they don't rip sideways. They rip up. Oh, Ow.
Ow.
Unknown
Tell us what else they don't tell us.
Kathy Griffin
Okay, so the nose running is intense because it now it's not snot. It's like water that just drips. And I get it when I'm nervous. Sometimes I get it from makeup if I have, like, too much powder. But that's more of a. That kind of makes sense. What's bad is I get it just before I go on stage. So it makes me look like I'm nervous, even though I'm not nervous. But I refuse to dab myself while doing my act because then it would just look like I was doing cocaine, and I'm not.
Imagine if that was just, like, cerebral spinal fluid just leaking from getting older.
That's the least of it. I mean, who knows where those fluids are coming from, because, like I said, it's like a water faucet. Someone turned On. And by the way, wait till you start to lose your vision. Last night I was driving in the rain, and I'm telling you, it's a miracle I'm here. I'm an atheist, and I prayed the whole way home. The whole way home. I found God. I mean, it was. There was. The glares happen at night.
Yeah, the glare. I hear about the glare.
Yep.
Do you have to wear those sunglasses?
Are you on heroin? What's happening?
If you think you're having it pretty rough.
Oh, boy.
I have Bell's palsy, so half of my face got paralyzed from stress.
Of course it did. Of course it did. What did you think was going to happen with this? Like, I can't believe you're sitting upright. I know.
Me neither.
You're functioning.
I don't.
Are you kind of swimming underwater?
I am. You know what the great thing about being on survival mode is that you are not attached to your feelings. Your feelings are all the way over here, and you're using your just reptilian lizard brain to get through each feel like a dude.
Yeah.
You're just white knuckling the whole thing. And then the tears will come maybe three months from now.
Okay.
Unknown
That's so foreign to me. Have you had. I can't detach from my feelings.
Kathy Griffin
I don't think I'm a prisoner of my feelings.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
My feelings have me up the ass like a rusty dildo. And out of all of the trials and tribulations I've had in the last few years, it was actually my divorce that freaking took me out.
Unknown
Really.
Kathy Griffin
Like, that was the one where I was like, get out of bed, Kathy. Get out of bed. Yeah, because I'm such, like, a fluffball.
Are you able to feel for love? Are you able to feel and cry in the moment as it's happening?
Or are you, like, a delayed reaction?
Okay.
Because first was survival mode.
Yeah.
So I got. I got roommates, which is hysterical.
You have roommates?
Roommates in my life. But now I have roommates. And I know this is a shock, but it's two genuine homosexuals. They're real, live homosexuals. They're allowed to move in now. They're allowed to vote. They have all kinds of rights. Now, that may not last with this administration, but that's why I have to buy jeans in three sizes. Because of this administration.
Unknown
How are you feeling, by the way?
Kathy Griffin
I'm on the enemies list. I. I did a show last weekend in D.C. and I invited several of the heroes that protected the Capitol on January 6th. And let me tell you, those men and women are on the enemy's list as well. And haven't they been through enough? And Trump took away their benefits. Crazy.
While pardoning everyone on pardoning all the rioters. Yeah.
So we had a pizza party. So I said, what can I do for you? Since we're all going to the camps together? And they go, we like beer. And I went, I can do that. So after my show, we went back to my hotel and had pizza and they had beer.
Unknown
Is he gonna just, like, never give up power and go for the third term?
Kathy Griffin
Yes. He said, the elections are over. We've had our last election. And believe him, no.
Unknown
He will die one day.
Kathy Griffin
He will die. But let me tell you something. President J.D. vance will never die. Like, you can tell. He's one of those Republicans. She's on Congress, lived to be 200. Yeah.
Cockroaches, though. They live without their heads.
Karl Rove. They just don't.
What is it about politicians that live really long, though? I do. I always do wonder why they never die young unless they're assassinated.
And why don't they get Bell's palsy? How can you have it, J.D. vance?
They're giving it to the hot girls.
What is that problem? Use your hot girl privilege. Let's call the vice president on speaker and tell him he is very overdue for Bell's palsy. But let me tell you why. Because they sleep like babies at night. I am convinced. We just got served a big sandwich, so I'm just gonna try to tell my jokes now. Girls, guess what I'm gonna do next week? You're not even gonna believe this. So I'm 64 years young, right? I'm. Don't laugh. You can laugh at me. Cause I'm laughing at myself. This is so revolutionary. You've probably never heard of it. I'm starting my own YouTube show. Okay, that was a smattering. That was a smattering of applause.
Unknown
I literally was scouring the Internet for fresh Kathy Grif. And I'm like, I'm waiting for this.
Kathy Griffin
Okay? I'm gonna call it Good Trouble with Kathy Griffin. And I'm. I don't even think I'm gonna have guests, because, as you know, that can be difficult. Not everyone is Kathy Griffin, who just shows up parking three blocks away by mistake, and then just calling my own assistant going, I'm lost, and I don't even know what street I'm on. But I'm gonna do it just to have something to do with my brain. So I don't get all depressed after the tour. And I'm probably just gonna look at the camera and rant and maybe I'll have guests, but I don't even know what the show is yet.
Unknown
I'm so glad to hear you say this. For multiple reasons, one of which my theory with Britney Spears when she shaved her head is that she just got off tour.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah.
Unknown
And didn't know what to do with herself and went crazy. And I think that we as touring comedians and performers need to be prepared for the crash.
Kathy Griffin
That crash is real.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
And I get the crash even after a pod, which is a small grouping. Like last weekend I had three states in three days. And I came home and I was like, so depressed the next day. And then I was like, oh, daw, that's right. Because the three days you're on that high of performing. And you know, I'm friends with Sia, the singer, so. Sia.
Unknown
We love Sia.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah, Love, love.
She's the best.
She's the best. And so she describes it as like your whitewater rafting and you're going along, you're going along, and then you just go off a cliff and down you go. So she was like, you gotta remember that cliff is coming. Like, enjoy the rafting and it's exciting, but the cliff is coming.
Unknown
And it's also such a mind because like, I, in my mind, I always think, oh, when I'm done with work, life is going to be like, perfect.
Kathy Griffin
Relaxing and you can do all the stuff you need to do.
Unknown
And then it's, wait, what is torture?
Kathy Griffin
What is that pathology and sickness that you both have because you have the opposite.
I have a stand up disorder.
That is I.
Which I see a lot. Comedy disorder.
Bobby has it. All of you guys have it. But I don't know because I think as a normie and an outsider here, when work is done, I am so happy and so relaxed. I do not want to go back.
But then look at us. We both want, like, does that not like, okay, but run the show in our heads all night. So first I go home and have a tuna melt. But I'm writing, rerunning the show.
I do love a good tuna melt.
Who doesn't?
Unknown
But like, wait, but if you were just to have nothing to do for like a month, I think you would freak out.
Kathy Griffin
It's just that I'm like, I seriously am, like, I need to bedrot for an extended period of time.
I'm all for that. I think it's underrated. I Think bedrotting is good. And, I mean, unless you get actual bed sores.
Yeah, we don't.
Like, in which case, you need some antiseptic.
My mom is an expert of bed sores. If you do get them. She's a hospice nurse.
Oh, then she's seen her. By the way, I keep hitting my microphone, and it looks like my mic is agreeing with me. Like, it's like my microphone is affirming me.
Unknown
Like, yeah, wait, I feel like that's not true. I feel like in your downtime, you take care of, like, 25 animals and 16 birds.
You adopt ravens.
Kathy Griffin
Do you foster?
I do foster a lot.
A lot.
I've fostered maybe a total of, like, 22 dogs in the last few years.
How do you do the handoff?
Unknown
I know.
Kathy Griffin
Okay.
I couldn't. I would be the foster fail I fostered one night.
Unknown
I still think about that dog.
Kathy Griffin
Of course I would be. I would have a hundred, and I would live somewhere in Montana.
The sweetest text messages I get. And I got one two days ago of the most beautiful grown shepherd. And it was one of the puppies that I fostered just a couple months ago. And that's the big payoff, I think.
Is seeing them so happy. And I'm just gonna be BO enough to ask this, what is it with hot chicks and rescues? Like, I tell my straight guy friends, and I have seven. I tell each one of them, if you want to meet a hot chick, hang out at rescues, or get on, like, a mailing list of rescues because all the chicks are hot.
I have a controversial take on just the rescue community as a whole. And this is like, no slight to anyone who's doing an amazing job rescuing.
Dogs or lesbians of all kinds.
Right. Correct. Is I really think that we are a certain variety of broken that can only be healed through service of animals, not humans. Like, a dog is just so unconditional, and there's such a true exchange of love there that. And I've been in rescue for a long time. I cannot say that we are of the sane variety.
So you could watch a human being just bleed out, you don't give a shit. But if it's a kitten, that kitten's going home with you.
Unknown
Correct.
Kathy Griffin
Okay.
Unknown
I also think that animals don't have ulterior motives with hot girls. Like, they're not trying to fuck them.
Kathy Griffin
Agree. They don't. They think we're all hot. That's why we love them.
Do dogs really think we're all. I don't think so. I think Dogs discriminate.
Interesting.
Yeah, I. I've seen dogs. Like, I. I had one particular discriminatory dude just could tell if it was, like a meth head.
Right.
And was like, no, thank you. Not into that.
Yeah.
And would, like, like, be totally aggressive.
Unknown
I need advice.
Kathy Griffin
Go.
Unknown
Okay. A couple things. First, you. How when you take a break from stand up.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah.
Unknown
And let's say, you know, well, I.
Kathy Griffin
Took a six and a half year break, but that was for a different reason.
Unknown
Right? That was for a very crazy reason. Okay, so you take a break and let's say, you know, you've. You've burned off your last set. And a special. How do you start from scratch? Do you. Do you get back on stage with nothing and just ramble? Do you tell me, because then where.
Kathy Griffin
Are you doing back after six and a half years? The Mirage was kind enough to invite me back. And so I'm doing minimum 90, but I tend to do two hours.
Oh, my God.
I have an opener. I write all my own stuff. I tried to write a bunch of stuff prior to the show, but I've been doing it in an improvisational way for so many long years, decades, that something happened when my Doc Martens hit that stage, and I just was able to go. Now, I'm not saying it was all gold, trust me, but, like, I felt like there was a real flow with the audience, and they were like, we get it. This is her first time back. She's trying all kinds of new stuff. And.
Unknown
Did you have a notebook?
Kathy Griffin
Yes, I'm so old school that I still have a notebook. And it usually has about eight things written down. And that's two hours if I'm good, two hours and 15 if I'm naughty.
Did you.
Unknown
So you. Let's say. Let's say you pick a topic and.
Kathy Griffin
Then, like, Kanye is tweeting today. He's tweeting. Hitler was so fresh. S O o o o Hitler. Just take that in. Yay. Yay. Was so fresh.
Unknown
So disappointing.
Kathy Griffin
And by the way, it was one of, like, 50 tweets. He also said he's channeling Andrew Tate. Yikes. I know.
Unknown
I'm. What's going.
Kathy Griffin
All of our pussy's deflated. It's just the mention of Andrew.
We can fit into the small jeans again.
Seriously, get me those size 25s.
Unknown
So you take one topic. Are you going in knowing kind of how you feel?
Kathy Griffin
I know my take on it.
Unknown
Okay.
Kathy Griffin
But I don't know if the jokes.
Unknown
Are gonna work and you don't know the words right. You just know this is how I feel.
Kathy Griffin
Right?
Unknown
Okay, then that's how you do stand up comedy, everyone.
Kathy Griffin
I learned because, remember, I come from an improv background. So I think it was all those years at the Groundlings, which is an improv group in Los Angeles, similar to Second City in Chicago and in Canada. And I think it was all those years of improvising, but that's the only way I know how to do it. Like, I've never been able to, like, write an act and then rehearse it and then do it.
Unknown
Same people are always like, like, what's your writing process? I'm like, I just go on stage and talk.
Kathy Griffin
Amen.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah.
Unknown
Who was your class of Groundlings people? Because I know there's.
Kathy Griffin
Oh, my God.
We got Will Ferrell.
We got Will Ferrell. So I became a teacher when I was in the company, and Will Ferrell was my student, and Sherry O'Terry.
Unknown
Oh, my gosh.
Kathy Griffin
So they came up together, and they did the cheerleaders and the Groundlings, and they did all their characters. And when I was in the Groundlings, it was Lisa Kudrow from Friends and Julia Sweeney, who later got on Saturday Night Live. We all auditioned the same night, me, Lisa, and Julia Sweeney, and Julia got the job, and Lisa and I were crushed and convinced we were never gonna work. And then I thank God I got on a series the next year. And then, of course, she became Phoebe on Friends. And we're friends to this day, all of us. And so I was even in the company with Phil Hart, who was on Saturday Night Live, I know, tragically murdered. And I remember that night like it was yesterday. But he was, like, a genius. Like, there's a few times when I felt like, you know, Robin Williams, Joan Rivers, Don Rickles, where I felt like, I'm in the room with genius.
Unknown
Really.
Kathy Griffin
I knew, like, in the moment going, okay, that would be a genius. And that was Phil Hartman. So brilliant and quick and funny and ridiculous. And besides charming and super, super smart and super intellectually curious. And I felt like he was definitely somebody that was influential just to watch him work.
Unknown
Do you know what happened? Like, why that happened?
Kathy Griffin
I know that his wife Brynn was a model, and I think she always felt like she was in his shadow, maybe, and because he kind of got the glory because he was so talented and knew all the celebrities. And my guess is. And there was an element of the guy that was never the most gorgeous guy in the room, which is Phil, but also every guy in comedy pretty much. I mean, yeah, True. I'm being kind. Okay. But, you know, then he gets this. Literally a tall, blonde, gorgeous model. And then over the years, my guess is they probably didn't end up having all that much in common. They did have two kids. And then she. I don't know if she was doing drugs prior to their relationship or then got into drugs. And then the night that she killed him, she was partying with Andy Dick. Never a good idea. Almost certain to end up dead.
I have an Andy Dick story for you. We had him on Tiger Belly and my other podcast with Bobby Lee, and we have our show in our. What was our condo at that time, our home. We thought it was just gonna be him showing up because, you know, that's what. You're a guest on the show, you show up. He brought an entourage of, like, 13 people I think he had just met, like, Andy. Yeah.
And were they underage?
I don't even know who they were.
I just saw this whole take a leap, allegedly, except he went to the hospital.
And I had a full blown panic attack.
Like Elsinore.
I had a panic attack. I was like, who the fuck are these people? And I was so. I didn't have it in me to be like, everyone get the fuck out.
Hi, bitch. These are my friends. I just met them. I did a gig with Annie one time, and I said, let's go out to eat after. But no boys. I mean it. No boys. And then we get into the car and this was in Jacksonville, Florida, by the way. And we get into the car and then this fucking teenage boy gets in and I go, get out, get out. And then Andy goes, fine, Grandma. So, I mean, as criminal as he is, he is funny.
What happens, like, that does break my heart, that part, that he is so clearly talented.
Yes, he is funny and talented. Yeah, but I know.
Unknown
So I didn't realize that she was with him, that Phil Hartman's wife was.
Kathy Griffin
With him with Andy partying. And then whatever happened then that, you know, made her go and shoot him dead in his bed.
Unknown
She also was. She went to Buca di Beppo right before she shot him. That's a fun fact.
Kathy Griffin
Whoa.
Unknown
And Encino, that is.
Kathy Griffin
See, it makes you wonder, like, did she have the plan in mind then? Or was it just. But it was just in the comedy, the Groundlings community, we were rocked.
Unknown
I can't imagine.
Kathy Griffin
We just.
Unknown
It's such a wild, unnatural tragedy.
Kathy Griffin
And you never would have thought that could possibly be his trajectory. And he was so good, obviously, on SNL for, like, years. Like, I think he was on that show for something like 13 years. But, yeah, I loved working with him. And sometimes I'd be in a scene with him and I'd have to get back in the scene because I'd almost, like, stop acting and just watch him.
Unknown
Really?
Kathy Griffin
He was so talented. Yeah.
Unknown
Wow. That is because it's just like. I hate to say it, but you just. Usually the husband kills the wife. That's just. That's how the story.
Kathy Griffin
And if the wife kills the husband, it's usually on Snap.
Yeah.
And it's a lot more entertaining.
Oh, I'm sure they've done a million, like, discovery ID shows about it and stuff. Even. I think I watched even a doc about it. I know cocaine. It's a hell of a drug. It really is.
Or Buca de Peppo. Honestly, that might be it.
Also.
That's how you know someone's hit a low.
Yep.
It's Buca de Peppo.
Yep.
Unknown
Fetishini Alfredo.
Okay. I have another advice question, and it kind of relates to what you just said about, like, when you didn't get snl, you thought your career was over. I have this form of depression where when something bad is happening or whatever it may be, I just cannot imagine that it will never not be this way. I'm always frozen in that bad moment, and I'm like, I'm never going to get better. This is never going to. I'm. Whatever it is. My career will never go change.
Kathy Griffin
And you believe it. It really is internalized.
Unknown
What is up with that?
Kathy Griffin
Okay, first of all, total sufferer from that. And that's why I said, like, the divorce took me out because I was so heartbroken that I couldn't imagine not being that level of heartbroken, which is not sustainable, by the way. So I do. You guys. The stuff I do is. I'm just gonna tell you because it's just embarrassing. I do cold plunges, Stella.
Unknown
I'm a big cold plunge person.
Kathy Griffin
Okay, so then I don't have to apologize.
Unknown
No, it's amazing.
Kathy Griffin
It rocks your brain, quite literally, because when you jump in there, it's kind of like whatever problems you thought you had were nothing in comparison to a very fast death. And so you. You're going to almost survival mode of, like. But then your other half of the brain is like, I can make it to eight seconds, which is still a goal of mine. But I found that, like, one day. One day I had a show in Canada, and I was so depressed and having a panic attack that I was fearful that I Would have to cancel the show, which is dumb because I've never done that. But they had a cold plunge and I was like, okay, I'm ruining the hair. I'm going in. And I did the sauna cold plunge a few times, and I had to even buy a bathing suit at the gift shop. And what's funny is my tits are real, which is a nightmare. And they're like khaki sacks. And I could just put them over my shoulder or I could juggle with them. And so I buy one of those, like low cut one pieces and then I don't notice that one of my tits has just kind of fallen out of a corner. So, like Tara Reid in that red carpet picture. Poor thing. I know we always hear your name.
Unknown
And go, oh, she needs to come back.
Kathy Griffin
You know what? I think it's too late. Rebrand.
Well, okay. I watched her on that special forces show. Oh, that's celebrity.
Yes.
No, no, not Dr. Drew. It's like special forces guys that try to put people like Tara Reid into near death experiences, by the way. And Jack Osborne was in it. Oh, wow. It was definitely wild.
And how was she on there?
She was in a lot of pain and had to quit because she, you know, weighs 80 pounds and is very sweet. Not entirely lucid, but, you know, I just watched her thinking, okay, honey, you gotta quit because you're not gonna win. And when they say she was 87 pounds wet, she actually was wet. I mean, they were. They were throwing them into dark rivers at 2 in the morning. They were like having them escape a car bomb like that show. I don't know why any celebrity does it because it is truly near death experiences. And I say that as the winner of the celebrity mall. I don't know if you guys know that about me.
Your titty fell out on the side.
Yeah. And then the other one was just dangling. It was just like a broken foot. Like Conor McGregor when he broke his foot and it was just dangling at that. So I was like trying to get him in order, but I'm in like a public sauna and I'm taking the elbow, trying to be like, mm, I love it here in Canada. I hear Justin Trudeau single. And so I kind of. But I look at that bathing suit now and I just laugh.
Unknown
I do it naked. So.
Kathy Griffin
You can't do that at a hotel, you lunatic. This was a co ed sauna. Hi, boys. Don't mind me. Naked. Wait, I see three hairs left.
Do you go to any of the Korean spas? It's fully nude.
No, I should though, because those are. Are good. And all the celebrities go. And I do remember going one time a million years ago and seeing Cindy Crawford naked and thinking, it's too bad I'm not a dude because she was such like the hot model of the moment. Like, I thought, oh, my guy friends are gonna be so right.
Unknown
It was wasted on you. Wasted experience.
Kathy Griffin
Do you. I do that. I do like anything I can to like at. Like in, in aa, they call it opposite action or acting. Yeah. And just the opposite of whatever you're feeling. Like if you can shake maybe your physical self like the cold plunge does, then it might shake the inner demons.
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Kathy Griffin
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Unknown
I'm about to eat this for the first time.
Kathy Griffin
I've never tried these with the protein bars. Pretty good.
Unknown
I'm sorry. It's so good. 12 grams of protein, 1 gram of sugar, 9 grams of fiber. This is. I'm taking all them home and I'm not sharing.
Kathy Griffin
Every serving of Magic Spoon high protein cereal has crazy macros. 13 grams of protein, 0 grams of sugar, 4 grams of net carbs. And now they have the protein treats.
Unknown
Okay. The protein treats are literally crispy, crunchy, airy, tasty, yummy. This one's marshmallow flavor. This is definitely really good. I need to try blueberry muffin. Magic Spoon. If you're a protein and fiber girly, finally, the cereal is back in your life. Get $5 off your next order at magicspoon.com Tuesday or look for magic spoon on Amazon in your nearest grocery store.
Kathy Griffin
Oh, and the cereal come in so many nostalgic flavors like cocoa cinnamon roll. That's magicspoon.com Tuesday for $5 off magicspoon.com Tuesday.
Unknown
You need the bars.
Kathy Griffin
The bars are great.
Unknown
You need the bars.
Kathy Griffin
This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. If you're anything like like me, therapy is an indispensable part of my life.
Unknown
Well, I'm nothing like you, but therapy is an indispensable part of my life.
Kathy Griffin
I mean the fact that we have to withstand months of sunsets at 4pm.
Unknown
Oh, see, that's fine with me.
Kathy Griffin
Oh my God. BetterHelp has never been more in need.
Unknown
Our depression is so opposing.
Kathy Griffin
My depression is peaking and I am not in a good place. But thankfully there is always therapy. It has been the backbone to my existence for the last 20 years of my life. And BetterHelp is fully online making therapy affordable and convenient, serving over 5 million people worldwide.
Unknown
I cannot tell you how much therapy helped me during this postpartum year. Like I was not going to come out on the other side without my therapist. You guys can discover your relationship green flags with better help. Visit betterhelp.comtrash Tuesday today to get 10 off your first month. That's better help. H e l p.com Trash Tuesday I need to remember opposite action. That's always, always good. Get out of bed when you don't want to.
Kathy Griffin
And they say for like in biology, the idea like to evolve you need medium disturbance. You need some level of disturbance in your life or else you actually don't propel forward. Oh, so you, you cannot.
I love that you think I'm still trying to go forward in my life. Honey, I am treading water like you wouldn't believe.
Wait, I'm with you there. I'm barely surviving. So we've been shipwrecked for a while.
She doesn't know where she is. I don't. She's barely here. When I said underwater, I was half kidding.
I, I honestly, I wore this the last episode and episode before.
Right. Oh my God. She stopped showering.
Unknown
You look bad.
Kathy Griffin
No, you look. You're still the hot chick rescuer. Don't worry.
Unknown
Yeah, that's true. You can see it underneath.
Kathy Griffin
So what you do is you basically go. You put yourself through any type of like physical.
Yeah, I'm also big. Like I really do go on a two hour walk every day, which is really crazy. I know.
That's, that's a very like Gen Z of you.
I know. Hot girl walk, two hour walk.
Unknown
Are you listening to something?
Kathy Griffin
I listen to either a Rachel Maddow podcast cast called Ultra or I listen to uptempo music which has not evolved since the 2000 and tens arrested development. Like I all my era is pretty much 80s, 90s, 2000s, but anything after 2020, I have no idea. Like the super bowl, you know, with Kendra. I don't even know if I can name one song. I know that he does a feature on the Sia song the Greatest, and I doubt that's his entire library of work. And I understand he's in an argument with Drake.
Unknown
Oh, that's right. They're having an argument, a formal argument.
Kathy Griffin
An argument between Drake and. What I get from TikTok is that Kendrick won. But I don't know like what he won, but I guess he won the argument. And that's all you really need to know? That's all I need to know.
Yeah. Yeah. And he won album of the year, right, at the Grammys. Or was it.
Or was it Cowboy Carter?
It was Cowboy Carter.
Unknown
Yeah. Wait, you mentioned Joan Rivers.
Kathy Griffin
Yes.
Unknown
What was your relationship with her?
Kathy Griffin
Oh, I loved her. We were good friends. She played my mom on a sitcom. What? Yes. I mean, I just was in love with her and she was my mentor and my buddy, and I miss her every day.
Unknown
Do you feel like you're sort of stepping into the.
Kathy Griffin
It's the best compliment I get every so often if somebody makes that connection.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
Do you feel she's kind of passed the baton to you? I wouldn't be presumptuous enough to say yes, but if I think about an incredibly high compliment, it would be the notion to even be put in the same category with Joan.
Unknown
And is that what you sort of how you see yourself?
Kathy Griffin
Like when I was a kid, I think she was, yes. I saw Moms Mabley and Tony Fields and Phyllis Diller. But I think seeing Joan take over the Tonight show from a middle aged white guy, insane was so fucking powerful. And every time she guest hosted was an event. And I remember my whole family laughing, even my dad, and thinking, wait a minute, she even won over my dad, who's like a straight guy, also a white guy. And so I was thinking, let's go. And then I foolishly thought that Late night would then be taken over by women. And we keep thinking that it's been since Joan that there has been a woman in the network daily late night spot.
I think they keep trying. Right?
Unknown
Like Lily Singh they keep acting like it's gonna change.
Kathy Griffin
And it's not at the Fallon Hour.
No.
And not at the. They give the girl, like, the 1:30 in the morning or cable. Yeah, not since John, has it been one of the, like, four big networks that they've committed, like, you know, I wonder if misogyny, like, that's it. And also, it's the same guys. You guys, I have meetings with these old dinosaurs that I met with 30 fucking years ago. Like, I walk into meetings nowadays and I go, ugh, you're still alive. Like, I can't believe these executives never go away. And they're the same ones, and they have to be me too. Ed out of the business. Like Leslie Moonves. And then the wife found Jesus. Now every time I watch Big Brother at the end, when she goes, it's Julie Chen Moonves like that, I'm like, okay, Jesus, get off the cross. But I would find Jesus, too, if I was with Leslie Moonvest. I would find him real fast, run into his loving arms.
Unknown
I. I could see Nikki Glaser, like, taking over for Kimmel or Fallon or something.
Kathy Griffin
I could see that. I thought she did a great job on the Globes. I love that they signed her for next year. Just a word of warning. That can be a thankless job. So remember, like, I love that she did well. And by the way, I also love Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, so. Hello. Considering how many guys bombed at that job, three women nailed it. Yeah, but it's a rough gig. Like, people think, you know, hosting the Academy Awards or the Grammys, but you got a lot of pouty celebrities. And I just gotta say, in one of the shows, when they cut away to Selena Gomez and Taylor Swift, two of the wealthiest women in the world, and somebody made a joke about them and they just cut away to them going, I just have to say, as a comic and a Swiftie and a Gomezinator, whatever the hell they're called, scared of those armies. Anyway, I just don't care for that. I just. Just feel like. I know we're getting more sensitive as a society, as we should, but if you're that big of a star and you're gorgeous and you're a billionaire and you've got products and just take the joke. Like, that's why I like the Kardashians. They just take the joke on the chin and you write about that.
They really do.
They really don't give a shit. Like this. I have called them dirty whores for decades, and they're still Nice. And they invite me. And Chloe texted me on the way here, like they're. They know how to do it, man.
Unknown
We're sponsored by skims, so we love them.
Kathy Griffin
Yes.
And of course.
Unknown
And good American. We love the Kardashians. Girls.
Kathy Griffin
I do a thing about wearing a good American shirt in my act that goes up my butt. And then Chloe sent me a funny text about it, and I read it in the show. Oh, I know. So I. I'd love any celeb, whether they're a reality star or, you know, Glenn Close. I love any one of them that has a good sense of humor.
Yeah.
Unknown
Someone that could do that.
Kathy Griffin
And they're still hard to find. So I didn't like when the younger girls, Taylor and Selina, were doing the eye roll. I'm like, ladies, ladies, you won. You won the game of life. No need for the eye rolls. The comic knows if no one's laughing, don't worry. So just take the joke on the chin.
Everybody.
Are we making plantains?
I'm just hanging on to them for emotional support.
I brought my emotional support dog. And then he tried to attack another dog.
Unknown
Did he really?
Kathy Griffin
No.
Well, he barked in a.
Unknown
That's okay.
Kathy Griffin
Chihuahua way.
Oh, yeah.
You're not supposed to. His job is to not. But he just forgot. And I got the jacket from Amazon and everything. I mean, I did it right.
Unknown
The certificates.
Kathy Griffin
I do. I have the certificate. I have a note from my shrink. Oh, my God. And my shrink note is so funny. It's like. To whom it may concern, this woman, Kathy Griffin, who I've treated, really needs her support dog with her at all times. She has four of them. Whether she has four or one, trust me, she needs that. Let her pass through the fucking dog in the restaurant. I don't want to hear about your rules and regulations and citations. This chick is crazy. Give her the fucking dog. Now I'm paraphrasing. Okay, now can you see my nose running?
Unknown
Oh, yeah, I can when you ask.
Kathy Griffin
No, don't tell me you're hot and you have a secret nose. Run. That's my dream.
Unknown
I'm Jewish. My nose runs all the time, too.
Kathy Griffin
I'm scared that, like, is it religious?
Unknown
No.
Kathy Griffin
Maybe I'm Jewish and I didn't know till today.
Unknown
I think you are.
Kathy Griffin
I could pass.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
Who are we kidding?
Unknown
You got it all.
Kathy Griffin
Thanks. Wait, what happens? Oh, I need advice. What happens when your therapist is possibly also displaced from the fires and you've lost your therapist?
Well, then you have to listen to their problems. Charge them the same thing. They charge you. Were you Malibu or Altadena?
Altadena.
So sorry. Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Yeah, it's okay.
Where do you start?
I know lead abatement is where I'm at today.
Okay.
Yeah. They gotta clean a place of lead. High amounts of lead. Did I send you that text?
Yeah. Did the rain make it worse?
I'm not sure. Every sort of. Everyone's like 5050 on it, right? They're supposed to wedding. The ground is supposed to help, but I don't know. I don't know anything. I watch these, like Caltech.
Oh, I love the Caltech lesbian.
Wait, is that. I don't know, the Caltech lesbian.
Oh, she's a legend in la. She's got the gray hair and the cargo shorts. She's. Yes. You know her?
Yeah, I just. I didn't realize she was a legend.
Lesbian, I'm assuming. Sorry if I've made a leap in error. All right, put up a picture. Bring her back. There she. Come on. Yeah, I think that's her. Although she's dolled up in that picture, I'm not gonna lie, but that's her.
Unknown
Wait, Kilo. Oh, yes.
Kathy Griffin
The earthquake lady.
Unknown
Wasn't she on, like, John Mulaney's show? I think.
Kathy Griffin
I'm sure she is a freaking legend. I know she puts those boys in their place, I guarantee.
Unknown
Oh, I love that.
Kathy Griffin
Oh, it does say lesbian right there.
In a million years, am I this intuitive?
Unknown
Kalila. So you're. Why are they doing lead abatement? Like, because then you could maybe get some of your stuff or.
Kathy Griffin
No, no, I think it's for.
Or.
I don't know. I. I. They just tested the. What remains, and they were like, this is high on lead. And we'll see where we go from here.
Okay, I have to. I have a make. I have a controversial take. Okay, Okay. I.
We love lead.
I love Mayor Bass. Hear me out. Hear me out. Beware of the Riccaruso. He is a maga. Republican.
Unknown
Of course.
Kathy Griffin
He ran for mayor as a Democrat, but he changed his party affiliation a week before he ran, and he's trying to make a black woman take the fall. She was elected to try to help with our homeless issue. She has been making progress. She's one person. And, you know, climate change is why the fires happen. So I don't think blaming our mayor is the way to go, but just be careful, because when I look at the Palisades, you know, the drone footage of Rick Caruso protecting his mall, the Air1 and everything around it is war zone. And I'm like, no, please don't vote for this guy. So he's probably going to run for governor. I don't know.
Unknown
No, are you kidding?
Kathy Griffin
Where are the recurs?
Unknown
He's a mall magnet.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah. Americana is a Caruso.
Right. And the Grove. So people vote for him because they think like Trump. Oh, he's a good businessman.
Unknown
No, but he's a rich guy.
Kathy Griffin
He's not going to want any regulations for the rebuild. And regulations are your friend. People listen to me. Regulations are a good thing. They keep you safe. It's about zoning, it's about fire protections as much as we can do.
Unknown
So they, they will build condominiums like on apart our apartments on the freeway.
Kathy Griffin
Like out of cardboard.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
Like that's what I'm saying is just he is going to be the first one to dive in there and do stuff. Probably not up to cod.
Unknown
So easy idea.
Kathy Griffin
Bass is going to be like, oh, I will say.
I will say this.
Unknown
Banana in hand.
Kathy Griffin
I will say this. I'm not anti Karen Bass at all.
And by the way, there was no looting. Like Fox News is like there's going to be riots in the streets. Implying that Altadena was.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
Because it's lent itself a brown black neighborhood.
Thank you for saying it out loud. But I'm just saying that was very much a fox.
It's too because I think that. That a lot of people were texting me too, like, watch out for your home being looted. And honestly, like there isn't a single person that I know or a neighbor of mine that has been looted.
No.
And in fact, when they were like, oh, there are people biking around taking pictures of homes.
Yeah.
No, those are the people like kind of checking up on their homes and I don't know. It's fucked up.
Have you been let in to look at it?
Yeah.
Oh, no. How'd you take it?
No, my. The neighborhood. Honestly. Devastated.
Did you burst into tears?
It's. It's. It's so devastating. Like I can't even put it into words.
Yeah.
Because Altadena is very picturesque.
Yeah.
We have the mountains, you have the trees, you have eaten Canyon.
Yeah.
There's waterfalls there.
Yeah.
It's beautiful there. Altina is so picturesque and to see it just in. Is just ashes. Is.
I live in Malibu and I haven't had the nerve to drive down PCH the couple days.
Yeah. I've been looking at the drone shots and. Yeah. Terrible.
Yep. I know. But it's climate change. Folks, of course it's not UFOs, you guys.
Unknown
I can't believe we're gonna even have to say that.
Kathy Griffin
Okay, how about clones?
Unknown
What about them?
Kathy Griffin
Nothing, except they're not real. What's with your friend? I thought we were cool, and now she just thinks I'm a clone. I'm a clone of Reba McEntire.
Unknown
I literally haven't even heard about clones since the sheep incident of the 90s.
Kathy Griffin
No, no. There's a whole TikTok thing where people think. Think Jamie Foxx is cloned, of course. And then, by the way, I'm very deep into the Diddy stuff, but on TikTok, so I'm not getting. I'm just getting, like, some information, and then a lot of. Probably you're still on the Diddy.
Is there still more to dig?
Look, I. You know, the word on the street is that Jay Z is next, but I don't know if the Beyonce mafia would allow that to happen.
I saw him at the Grammys. They look just fine.
I know he looked very comfortable, but he just dropped a claim this week against the minor that is suing him for rape because she described the house, and they said, did he never had a house like that? Well, guess what? He did, and they found it. So he had to drop three of his claims against the attorney, this guy named Tony Busby. And so it's. It's not looking great for him at this moment. And let's remember, it was a different time, you guys. Like, in the 90s, there was. There was an actual reality show about how to be a video host. And I believe it was called, like, how to Be a Video Ho. And it was the 90s. They had these girls that would show up. Nobody checked IDs, and they were in lingerie. And it was, like, almost a prestigious thing to be, like, in the background, of course. And then you either get sa'd or you're expected to blow these guys. And it was, like, a thing. And it was with allegedly, you know, the boy bands as well. Not Lance Bass, of course. He's the exception to everything.
He's saved.
He's totally our angel. He's our angel from Gay Habit Heaven.
Unknown
I love that he wanted to buy the Brady Bunch house.
Kathy Griffin
He did.
Unknown
He, like. He almost got it. And then the renovation show, like, came in and took it from out of his hands.
Kathy Griffin
But it was a bidding war.
Unknown
Yeah. The fact that he was, like.
Kathy Griffin
As if he couldn't renovate it with his gay self anyway. Like, it would take him a Week. You should call him to redo your house.
My face.
He'll have your face. Your house. Whatever it needs.
Unknown
Bass, we're calling upon you to rebuild Altadena.
Kathy Griffin
Please do it. And also, there's something delicious about now being the best looking one in the group. Like, he's in the best physical shape. He just looks great.
Unknown
Well, I mean, come on. We know why.
Kathy Griffin
Exactly. And it's gotta kill Justin because Justin's got, like a dad bod now and he's dancing in sneakers and. And look at Lance. Lance gets hotter. Lance is getting cuter.
Unknown
He is hotter.
Kathy Griffin
I love. Do you know I spend every Thanksgiving at his house still.
Unknown
What?
Kathy Griffin
Since the 90s. I know. I've known him since he was straight cute. That's how long I've known him. I. I love him so much. And his husband Michael. And they have twins.
Unknown
You have the best group of friends.
Kathy Griffin
I have such a good group of friends.
Unknown
Like, you're a cool girl.
Kathy Griffin
Oh, stop. Well, you know, I have these dinner and lunch salons. You guys have to come to one.
Are we invited?
Yeah.
Unknown
I would die.
Kathy Griffin
It's 12 people. And I cast it like a play. And it's people. Yeah, it's people that you wouldn't normally necessarily meet in life. So I make everybody go around the room and give their name and bonafitis. Cause I go. Cause there's usually like a couple celebs, but it's not all celebs at all. And. And you have somebody that's a top notch lawyer, first amendment lawyer, which I have many of sitting next to Sia. And then I'll make Sia sing. So I always make Sia sing. And God love her, she does it acapella and she blows it out of the water. And then I had a Christmas one, and Jennifer Lewis came from Black Ish. She plays the aunt on Black Ish. And she and Sia were duetting and they've never met. And that was a love story.
This is your dream essay.
I know. And then the last one I had, it was more of a politically focused one. And Lisa Rinna came with Harry Hamlin, and that was epic.
Unknown
Well, you know, I'm a housewife.
Kathy Griffin
Okay, now let me just say this. I've known Lisa for decades. She's okay. The girl that she was on that show her last season is really not the Lisa that I know. So I. I'm not one to say, you know, I should hold my banana. I'm not one to say, oh, it's the editors, because coming from reality, Myself. It's really not the editing, but I.
Believe it's the editing on my show.
It wasn't. Yeah, but remember, my show is from 2006. And so I'm just saying, she is a sweetheart. She's a ride or die.
Unknown
She seems fun.
Kathy Griffin
She's super cool. Harry is a dream. He went to Yale. He's so smart. He can talk about anything. He's still so hot. Okay, so get this. I don't know if you remember. Are you guys housewives at all?
I am.
Unknown
I wish I.
Kathy Griffin
There was an episode of Beverly Hills where Lisa took a glass and was so pissed at Kim Richards, she freaking broke it and was gonna twist it in her neck, which is my kind of bitch. And so she kept saying, because there was a rumor about Harry. I've never heard a single rumor about Harry in my life. And he's been around forever, not one thing. So they're at dinner and I go, so what was the rumor that pissed you off so much? And she's like, first of all, I blacked out. In that moment, I was about to kill someone. And then I go, what was the rumor? I go, harry, what was the rumor? And there's this pause, and he's such like a quiet spoken, intellectual guy. And he goes, goes, they said, I a dog. And you guys, I lost it laughing. And I went, what? I go, that's what you were gonna fight over? Somebody said, harry, the dog. And then I go, well, who didn't? No, I just thought that was the funniest thing of all the rumors. Like, how did even one person be like that is possible? Like, I thought the rumor was just that he was having an affair with somebody. Maybe an affair with like someone on the shelf show. Like, I thought, oh my God. And when he goes, they said, I the dog. I said, harry, if anyone says that about you, you have to just let it ride and just go with it, because that is funny.
As somebody who has been accused of sexual relations with dogs, I know how I now understand Lisa Rinna.
So maybe the rescue people came after her.
That's exactly the. The bane of my existence. Because I once told a story about how when I was a child, I was five, six years old, I had a much older cousin basically tell me.
That you should set puppies on fire, because that's extreme, I think.
So my dog was like humping one of us. And he was like, oh, telling a five, six year old this to make him feel better, you should do this. And like basically touch the dog. And I was a Child. And basically I told him, well, you're.
Not the inappropriate one in that scenario. It's the freaking cousin.
I feel like I was afraid to.
Always be been a freak from the day he was born. And that dude is still a freak.
Yes, I was. I feel like I was essayed. I told the story. And literally my comments are always like, you still dogs.
I mean, still.
You still jerking off dogs? And I'm like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. And imagine the rescue people seeing that in my comment section. They're like, we're not gonna give her this poster.
Of course not, because that rumor is so credible. I just thought that Harry Hamlin.
Unknown
Oh, my God.
Kathy Griffin
Carrie Hamlin is not a dog fucker. Stop it. Everyone loves her.
Unknown
She went so hard.
Kathy Griffin
She went so hard. And she said she. It was like being in the Matrix and that she realized she could kill someone. Like, she realized at that moment, like I could take someone's life. And then she was like, but I'm gonna go to prison forever and never see my husband and kids again. And I was like, that was a lot of thinking for just one glass break. And then. But so I thought that was just the funniest thing.
Kathy, where are you at with your love life?
Okay, you ready? Okay, this is. I'm really gonna come off like an asshole. Really like an asshole. So get ready. I can't imagine a man out there that would be good enough for me.
Hold on. That's a small clap.
Hear me out. Hear me out.
Not an asshole either.
I realize I've really been with gold diggers. Like, I really have. I'm so used to the one working hard, making the money that I'm just used to broke guys. And I just thought for once, like, what are the chances of me meeting a guy who does the shit I do? Owns their own house outright, has four dogs, flies private, works all the time, has a whole, you know, career that is something they're proud of and have whatever recognition and has been through a lot of stuff and is an empath. And I just thought, have you seen 64 year old straight guys? It's not too good. They all have Bell's palsy. They just don't know it. And so I have a banger body. I work out two hours a day. Come on. And so what are the chances that I'm gonna go on Raya? What am I gonna do? Fuck David Spade. I mean, when I saw his picture on Raya, I almost called him and I was like, david, you are hanging out with kid Ro. Way too much.
Unknown
We love you, David.
Kathy Griffin
I love David Spade. He's one of the funniest people I've ever hung out with. Like, if you're going to go to dinner with someone hilarious, go with David Spade. He is so naturally funny. But when I saw his picture on Raya and he's. He looks cute, but he's all.
I did see his profile.
Isn't it weird to see someone famous? And I. Because I don't know the app. So I went on once and of course, one of my girlfriend's accounts. So I was just like, let's see these guys. And they were tragic. And then I saw David and I just stopped. Right. I couldn't top that. I couldn't top that.
Unknown
It's very Gen Z of you, though, because that is how all the girlies are feeling. They're like, there's no guys out there that are good enough for me.
Kathy Griffin
And I get lonely. I don't mean to be like, I'm dating myself. No, I get lonely and I wish. Like, I actually like the institution of marriage. Like, I liked waking up with him every day and going to bed with him every night and doing stuff together and just watching TV together and dumb stuff. And so I, I like, I feel like I'm actually a couple person stuck in a single person's life. But on the other hand, I don't, I don't want another beat down. Yeah, I just can't handle another, like, heartache.
So I will say that there is hope because I found me the sweetest, kindest, most delicious Normie.
How? Also hot chick. So, like, not fair care. Well, also in la, thank God for the Bell's policy. That's all she has going for in LA.
Hot chick. But 40 is, you know, it's like 75.
And I don't.
Right, right. So. And coming off of a bad breakup, I was like, oh, okay, I'll be fine on my own. And I met this just amazing, wonderful, kind human being. And so I don't think she's just.
Saying how she met.
Unknown
Out of la.
Kathy Griffin
Oh, I met him diving.
Did you ship him?
Yeah, in a box.
That's what I think I'd have to do. I think I would have to ship in a foreign body.
I think so, yeah.
And then train him like my dogs with the jacket on. Service human. But I just, I. I just can't pick up another tab. Like, I can't pay another guy's bills. I can't be with another guy who hasn't paid an electric bill in 10 years. Like, I just.
Well, yours was extreme. Like, there was thievery.
Like, the first one stole from me.
Yeah. That's insane.
I know. And so I just am trying. Okay. I also sleep in bed every night with all four dogs, which I know is a block, but I have no to block at the moment, so I have to. If I have to start blocking out, then I'll make them sleep on their dog bed. But for now, it is the most loving. It's my favorite part of the day. I know. That's depression talking.
Unknown
No, no, no, no.
Kathy Griffin
That's our dream.
And all four of the babies are in with me. The fur babies.
That's the best.
The best. And they make their little doggy sounds.
And they do little circles to try.
To make their beds, and they have their little personality. And then sometimes I'll wake up and one's just looking at me like this, and then he'll just start to kiss me. Like, come on, we can cut this.
Unknown
If we need to. But I. There's something going on on TikTok right now, and it's that Candace Owens is, like, somehow becoming popular.
Kathy Griffin
Thank you. Thank you. Because I was at a friend's house yesterday and she put her on YouTube and it was about the topic.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
And then I go, that's Candace Owens. And she was like, oh, yeah, we don't like her, but she'll get to the topic. And I don't even know remember what the topic was.
Unknown
Well, she's been talking, going deep dives into the Justin Baldoni, Blake Locke lively drama.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah, I don't. Why would I. She's supposedly a political pundit. Why would I care about her opinion on that?
Unknown
She's like, cosplaying as, like, I'm a stay at home mom researching.
Kathy Griffin
She's a MAGA psycho.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
And she's stupid. And she wore, you know, White Lives Matter T shirt with Kanye, but she.
Went to war with Ben Shapiro. And I think that's sort of the beginning of when. Because Ben Shapiro so hated.
That's the Ann Culture game. Like, Ann Culture's been doing that game for years. And then they always make up up, and ultimately they vote Trump and they vote MAGA no matter what. So remember, unlike our team, where we split over every issue and we split, split, split. They stick together no matter what. So I'll bet she and Ben Shapiro will be doing a tour soon or something.
Unknown
That's so funny.
Kathy Griffin
Something.
Unknown
I mean, yeah, it is scary and it is dangerous. There's like this pipeline of, like, her Spilling celebrity drama that's like, I'm scared then that people will, like, start to trust her and then.
Kathy Griffin
Then believe her political shit, because she.
Unknown
Says nonsense all the time.
Kathy Griffin
And she's mean. Like, she's just. She's like a bully. So she's like a Bill O'Reilly or like Sean Hannity, where, you know, she just kind of tries to bully people. And I think she loves the engagement, so I try to never engage with her. Although half the people that I've had major fights with are now in the Cabinet, like, for real. In the cabinet, like, buffoons like, Rick Grinnell was the dni, and I've been in many a Twitter fight with him and Dershowitz, who's literally an Epstein guy. And then I went to Harvard last week because I got an award, and I was like, where's the Dershowitz rape room? And they're like, oh, awkward. Even the college kids were like, ah, this lady's scary. But I was like, I'm here. Where's my award? They couldn't backtrack. And I didn't even go to college, you guys. I'm like a dumbass. I don't even know state capitals.
But college is. Is. Is college still. I mean, it's like, it's a thing.
But the debt has got to change. And that's another reason I'm pissed that Harris lost is she would have really let Elizabeth Warren and AOC spearhead a thing about actual college debt forgiveness and kiss that goodbye for the next four years or 40.
I still have college debt.
Of course. Everybody does. It's terrible. It is a terrible Ponzi scheme. And your legislators that have been trying to change it are all losing. So Cory Booker, Liz Warren, like all of the good soldiers are. We just keep losing elections. The fact that we lost the trifecta. The House and the Senate, the presidency. I know.
Unknown
AOC for president.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah.
Unknown
Do we have a chance?
Kathy Griffin
I know, because people are too misogynistic, and they're. Especially her. She's so much. She's so superior to those guys that hate her. I mean, she's really got hate.
Unknown
Do you think we'll have a female president, like, in your lifetime?
Kathy Griffin
I don't know anymore because I really, really was dumb enough to think Harris was gonna win.
Unknown
I was, too.
Kathy Griffin
I really thought, she's got this. She's the not one scandal. Squeaky clean. Hello. Trained better than anyone in the country to become the president. We have a history of voting our vice presidents into the presidency, But I just. I've been doing sneaky surveys of my seven straights and I found out. You ready? Uh huh. None of them voted for her. These are guys that are my buddies.
Unknown
What did they say?
Kathy Griffin
They said they didn't vote for Trump, but they just couldn't vote for anybody. And one guy wrote in a guy from his office that he thought would be better and he's like laughing and I'm like, we're in the Handmaid's Tale because of you Fucking like, you voted for Trump if you didn't vote, you voted for Trump. And I'm like, crushed.
Well, that's sort of what happened.
I haven't talked to any of them since then, since I've done my survey question and I know we're all allowed to vote how we want and I'm a libtard. That's what they call me and the whole thing. But like, what is it about her besides her vagina that you really have a problem with? And they just say, keep saying the same Hillary shit. She seems like a know it all. There's just something off putting about her. I don't know, she seems superior in a way. I can't really relate to her.
Unknown
Say it's sexism. Just say you're a misogynist.
Kathy Griffin
Just say I'm a misogynist. And that's where I am today.
Unknown
All I'm hearing is that our first female president should be Tara Reid, because she's none of those things.
Kathy Griffin
She would check every box, the straight.
Unknown
Men would show up.
Kathy Griffin
That's right.
That's right. Because everyone loved that movie, American Pie. Everyone. The whole franchise was popular. I know. Did I bring everybody down?
No, no, no, no.
Bringing it back up. No, back up.
We're good. Okay.
Okay. Can we just talk about Kanye's wife for a second?
Bianca.
Bianca's who is my new Britney. I want a conservatorship that I'm in charge of with her. I want to bring her family into the fold. From Australia.
From Australia.
She's got a degree in architecture. Yeah. From University of Melbourne. And I. I can't imagine that she's in on it or it's a kink or all this shit the guys are saying to justify it. She's getting nothing from it. See, when Kim used to do those stunts, Kim would then sell the dress.
Yeah.
Like if that was Kim, she would have worn a really naughty dress and then it would be on sale the next day at skims. So this girl is just like his slave and I just. How could he not be physically Abusive. If he can get her to do that. And then he said in an interview yesterday, which he produced through his own company, that he's going to rent her out by the hour. What? Say that. Yeah.
Oh, sweet Bianca, come back.
I know.
Unknown
What do you think? Do you think this is all still about Kim because she's so similar?
Kathy Griffin
The body is insane.
Unknown
Is that what this is? Is this?
Kathy Griffin
I think so, yeah. I think he was obsessed with Kim prior to being with her and then treated her horribly and then will be obsessed with her, and I think he will torture her the rest of her life.
Unknown
I think it was also Donda, his mom. I think.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah.
Unknown
I think that him up.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah.
Unknown
And then it became all the rest of it.
Kathy Griffin
But. Yeah, but people lose.
Unknown
Totally. I'm not excusing at all. But he really went down just after she died.
Kathy Griffin
Today. The man tweeted, hitler is so fresh.
Unknown
That's crazy.
Kathy Griffin
That was one out. And then there were like a ton more that were super anti Semitic. Then it was him saying, yes, I'm an anti Semite and I'm thrilled to be, like, tripling down and, you know, the same old crap. But I'm sure he just doesn't want to take the cocktail that would make him not do like that.
Well, someone shoot him with a booty Juice. Juice.
Yep.
Unknown
What's the Booty Juice?
Kathy Griffin
I'll shoot him right in the butt.
Like, with a. Like.
Like a blow dart. Like a blow dart. Yeah.
I'm sure Kim's thought about that a couple times.
If she hasn't, never mind.
And he said he's gonna make the daughter into a bigger star than he is. And I was like, she's a child. Please don't say that, because now I think he probably will. She's just a little kid. I mean, I don't even know if she's in high school you yet.
No, I don't think she is. She's not. Yeah.
Unknown
I have a question going back to Kim Kardashian. I don't think she's. I think she's in the same position. I don't know who she dates because she's so powerful at this point.
Kathy Griffin
Agree. And she's got four kids by Kanye West.
Unknown
Right.
Kathy Griffin
So, like, you got to be a lot of man.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
And very secure.
Unknown
Yeah.
Kathy Griffin
And it wasn't Pete Davidson, who's missing, by the way. Is he still in the.
Oh, yeah. We haven't heard from him.
Right.
Unknown
I feel like he was making public appearances recently talking about his boys will.
Kathy Griffin
All carry him, you know, What? I mean, yeah, those guys have got him. Yeah. In a way we never do. We just let our people suffer.
Unknown
I feel like you and Kim should have. You both go on the search for a man together.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah, I agree.
Unknown
You guys both, like, you have the same kind of requirements.
Kathy Griffin
Same. And there's also no one who's good enough for us. Yeah. And although Kim is a big recru guy, and so we have. We're not politically aligned at the moment. And she's also rolling with Ivanka, which I don't care for. For, but I don't know that Kim is even like. Knows what political parties are like. I don't think if you said, what is the ethos of the Democratic Party or the Republican Party? I don't think she could answer that question. I think she just goes where dollar signs are. But I didn't know Bezos was a kiss the ring guy. I guess I was just. I missed that memo.
Unknown
I missed it, too.
Kathy Griffin
I know. I knew about President Elon, who, of course, I'm also in a beef with.
Unknown
I know, I know, I know.
Kathy Griffin
Yeah, that and I can't wait to run into. And I will. Someday I'll run into him. And same with Trump. Someday I'll.
Unknown
It's just funny because he, like, his claim to fame was like PayPal. And then everything you read about it, it's like, people are like, no, he kind of almost ruined PayPal.
Kathy Griffin
He really is. I don't know. He's just.
He's not a genius. I'm not buying the he's a genius thing. He doesn't have a skill set. He bought a company. He did. Well, he's in with the other bros. Those trucks are so embarrassing. It's like a used refrigerator. It looks like a refrigerator on its side. Side with wheels. And the light bar is embarrassing because it's like a bad Jedi light bar. And every time I see one, it's just a douche mobile. And I can't, like. Okay, what if you guys are suggesting maybe I date or be open to dating. What happens when he rolls up in a cyber truck?
Oh, yeah, that's a. That's dead and gone.
You guys. We can't.
But those.
Can we make a pack, please? To never get in one.
Do you notice that this site, they all kind of have cyber truck bodies? Like, someone on. On a TikTok said, like, Elon Musk has an autopsy body. They all kind of have that, like, puffy upper torso, but, like, weird. They're trying to make gains, but the HGH or the T or something that they're taking. The concoction is not working. They all look like thumbs.
More ketamine, Elon. More ketamine.
Something. There's like a puffiness about it where it's like, oh, thank God. That.
Well, of course that shirtless picture of him did him no favor. I know. Doused with water by Larry David and Armanuel. I mean, it's. You can't write it. Oh, yeah, I've looked at that picture and that's who else is in it. Larry David and Ari. Manuel and Elon went on vacation together.
Unknown
Well, you know what?
Kathy Griffin
We all know that's a bummer.
Unknown
We all know there's one thing that Elon wants and he'll never have it. And it's something that you have to be funny.
Kathy Griffin
Oh, I know.
That is true.
Unknown
He wants it so bad.
Kathy Griffin
When Chappelle brought him on stage, it was so embarrassing.
Unknown
He really wants to be funny. And some pe. I don't say this often. I think people can become funny very often if you. But he is proven it's not there.
Kathy Griffin
Again, cannot find it.
Unknown
He cannot find it.
Kathy Griffin
No. And he wouldn't know how to make fun of himself, which would be the easiest thing for him to do. Like that would be. People would be probably extra forgiving if he was trying to be funny about himself. But he doesn't.
Unknown
That's probably actually what is in the mixture that doesn't make him funny is he takes himself too seriously. And then you can't get over that.
Kathy Griffin
Also being a Nazi.
Unknown
Oh, that's true.
Kathy Griffin
I mean, when you're doing the Hitler salute, you know, twice.
Not once. Twice.
Unknown
They don't teach that at the Groundlings.
Kathy Griffin
No, they don't. Not at any level.
Unknown
Oh, my gosh, Kathy. This has all.
Kathy Griffin
As always, it's like we're just friends getting together.
Unknown
I know. This is so fun.
Kathy Griffin
Please invite us to your 12 person dinner.
Personal info.
Unknown
No, I don't think exchanging it now. And everyone has to go. See you on your tour.
Kathy Griffin
Go to Kathy Griffin dot com. Follow me on all the social media platforms except X. I also just found.
Unknown
Out that my life on the D list is on Peacock.
Kathy Griffin
It's on Peacock. I'm so glad people are rediscovering. My mom and dad, who are legends, were legends.
Unknown
I'm going to be doing a rewatch this week. I just found that out. Kathy, thank you so much for being here. We love you.
Kathy Griffin
And how to add context. I'm way too famous to know how to do that, but you will. I will.
Unknown
Yeah, sluggies. We'll see you next week with a brand new episode.
Kathy Griffin
Thank you, ladies. I love you, ladies.
Podcast Summary: Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn
Episode: "Kathy Griffin’s in Her Redemption Era"
Release Date: February 11, 2025
In this episode of Trash Tuesday, hosts Esther Povitsky and Khalyla Kuhn engage in a candid and humorous conversation with comedian and actress Kathy Griffin. The discussion delves into Kathy's recent tour successes, personal challenges, relationships within the entertainment industry, and her perspectives on current social and political issues.
Kathy Griffin opens up about the remarkable expansion of her PTSD-themed tour, which has surged from 40 to 75 cities thanks to the support from her fans:
Kathy Griffin (02:04): "You helped push my tour. The Kathy Griffin My Life on the PTSD Less Tour, which went from 40 cities to 75."
She shares her exhilarating experience performing at prestigious venues, including the Boston Symphony Hall:
Kathy Griffin (02:10): "Last weekend I played Boston Symphony Hall. Like I'm the symphony or something."
Her enthusiasm for the tour is palpable, showcasing her resilience and ability to connect with audiences despite personal struggles.
Kathy candidly discusses her ongoing battle with Bell's palsy, attributing its onset to stress:
Kathy Griffin (07:00): "I have Bell's palsy, so half of my face got paralyzed from stress."
She humorously addresses the physical manifestations of aging, including challenges with her appearance and the use of hairpieces:
Kathy Griffin (04:04): "I very nervously came here today without my toupee… I have a fake bangs… It's a toupee."
Despite these challenges, Kathy maintains her comedic spirit, turning personal insecurities into relatable humor.
Kathy reminisces about her time with The Groundlings, a renowned improvisational theatre group in Los Angeles, highlighting her interactions with now-famous comedians and actors:
Kathy Griffin (18:05): "We got Will Ferrell. So I became a teacher when I was in the company, and Will Ferrell was my student… when I was in the Groundlings, it was Lisa Kudrow from Friends and Julia Sweeney."
She shares heartfelt memories of her late friend Phil Hartman, praising his genius and the impact he had on her career:
Kathy Griffin (19:00): "Phil Hartman… he was so good… times when I felt like Robin Williams, Joan Rivers, Don Rickles…"
Additionally, Kathy discusses her enduring friendships with other celebrities, including Lisa Rinna and Sia, emphasizing the deep bonds formed over years in the industry.
Drawing from her improvisational background, Kathy explains her unique approach to stand-up comedy, relying heavily on spontaneity rather than pre-written material:
Kathy Griffin (16:30): "I have an opener. I write all my own stuff… I've been doing it in an improvisational way for so many long years… something happened when my Doc Martens hit that stage, and I just was able to go."
She underscores the importance of flow and authentic interaction with the audience, attributing her ability to connect to years of live performance experience.
Kathy critiques the slow progress of women taking prominent roles in late-night television, lamenting the industry's persistence with male dominance:
Kathy Griffin (34:24): "No, not since John, has it been one of the, like, four big networks that they've committed…"
She reflects on Joan Rivers as a trailblazer and the ongoing struggle for representation, praising hosts like Nikki Glaser while expressing skepticism about the industry's commitment to change:
Kathy Griffin (35:27): "I could see Nikki Glaser, like, taking over for Kimmel or Fallon or something."
Kathy advocates for resilience and a sense of humor among female entertainers, drawing parallels with the Kardashian family's ability to handle public scrutiny.
The conversation shifts to Kathy's views on local politics, specifically criticizing Mayor Rick Caruso and the handling of the Altadena fires:
Kathy Griffin (41:01): "He ran for mayor as a Democrat, but he changed his party affiliation a week before he ran… please don't vote for this guy."
She addresses the influence of climate change on wildfires, debunking claims from certain media outlets that attribute the fires to other causes like UFOs or cloning conspiracies:
Kathy Griffin (43:44): "I think it's climate change… horribly devastated…"
Kathy emphasizes the need for proper regulations and zoning to prevent future disasters, positioning herself as an advocate for sensible governance.
Kathy humorously examines her love life challenges, expressing frustration with the dating pool of 64-year-old straight men, whom she muses all suffer from Bell's palsy:
Kathy Griffin (51:54): "Have you seen 64 year old straight guys? It's not too good. They all have Bell's palsy. They just don't know it."
She shares her humorous take on online dating, particularly on the app Raya, and her affectionate admiration for comedian David Spade:
Kathy Griffin (51:53): "What are the chances that I'm gonna go on Raya? What am I gonna do? David Spade, I mean, when I saw his picture on Raya, I almost called him…"
Kathy balances this with reflections on self-love and the longing for a meaningful relationship, all delivered with her signature comedic flair.
Kathy delves into various celebrity antics and controversies, including her opinions on Candace Owens, Elon Musk, and Kanye West. She critiques their public personas and behaviors, often with sharp humor:
Kathy Griffin (63:24): "She's a MAGA psycho."
Her commentary extends to discussing the nature of celebrity relationships and the impact of public perception on personal lives, showcasing her knack for blending humor with incisive social critique.
The episode wraps up with Kathy Griffin reflecting on her enduring friendships, her passion for rescue animals, and her unwavering commitment to humor amidst personal and professional challenges. Her interactions with Esther and Khalyla highlight a blend of vulnerability and comedic resilience, offering listeners an engaging and insightful peek into her world.
Tour Expansion:
"You helped push my tour. The Kathy Griffin My Life on the PTSD Less Tour, which went from 40 cities to 75."
(02:04)
Bell's Palsy:
"I have Bell's palsy, so half of my face got paralyzed from stress."
(07:00)
Groundlings Memories:
"We got Will Ferrell… when I was in the Groundlings, it was Lisa Kudrow from Friends and Julia Sweeney."
(18:05)
Approach to Comedy:
"I've been doing it in an improvisational way for so many long years… something happened when my Doc Martens hit that stage, and I just was able to go."
(16:30)
Women in Late Night:
"No, not since John, has it been one of the, like, four big networks that they've committed…"
(34:24)
Political Critique:
"He ran for mayor as a Democrat, but he changed his party affiliation a week before he ran… please don't vote for this guy."
(41:01)
Love Life Frustration:
"Have you seen 64 year old straight guys? It's not too good. They all have Bell's palsy. They just don't know it."
(51:54)
Celebrity Commentary:
"She's a MAGA psycho."
(63:24)
Note: This summary intentionally excludes advertisement segments, sponsor messages, and non-content sections to focus solely on the substantive discussions and insights shared during the episode.