No One Came To Andrea Jin's Birthday Party

Summary

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Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn

Episode: "No One Came To Andrea Jin's Birthday Party"

Release Date: January 13, 2026
Guests: Andrea Jin, Jules
Summary By: Podcast Summarizer

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Episode Overview

This episode of Trash Tuesday is a cozy, funny, and sometimes melancholic deep-dive into friendship, introversion vs. extroversion, childhood trauma, and the longing for different forms of community. Andrea Jin joins Esther and Jules (subbing in for Khalyla) to reflect on topics ranging from Andrea’s traumatic childhood birthday party, personal growth and self-awareness (or its limits), the struggles of new parenthood, Asian and immigrant perspectives on community, and a hilarious, semi-chaotic game of "Guess Who?" The trio (plus guests) balance introspective vulnerability and therapy talk with plenty of quick-witted banter and signature "sluggie" chaos.

Note: Timestamps below are approximate and exclude ad reads and announcements.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Social Batteries, Relationships, and Introversion vs. Extroversion

• The hosts commiserate about the challenges of being in relationships where one partner is a homebody/introvert and the other is an extrovert.
• Esther and Andrea both share stories about preferring quiet alone time over outings, and the mild resentment or guilt that can bring up.
  • Andrea: "It was my birthday ... all I wanted was to be in a hotel alone with the person I've been dating. He was like, should we go see a movie? I'm like, no, I just want to sit here." (04:30)
  • Esther: "Dave will be like, could we watch a show? And I'm like, well, I thought we were hanging out." (04:58)
• The group considers whether self-awareness about relationship dynamics and personal flaws is actually enough to spark change.
  • Jules: "Your awareness means nothing. You learn that in therapy. You can know all about your problems and like not fix them." (05:35)

2. Why We Stay Stuck, Liking Our Problems, and Therapy Talk

• Andrea admits "hating change," and the group reflects on the comfort of routine and even of certain negative patterns or "problems."
  • Andrea: "I hate change. So that in itself is enough to keep me from doing anything." (06:10)
  • Discussion about friends who "like their problems"—e.g., always complaining about a bad relationship but never leaving.
    • Jules: "She just likes her problem. And honestly, you just have to accept it so you don’t feel frustrated.” (07:42)
• Consensus: Knowing you have a problem is better than being oblivious, but execution is what actually matters.

3. Childhood Core Memories & Trauma

• Andrea tells her infamous pizza party story: at age ten, her birthday party was snowed-in and nobody came, leading to a core trauma and a theme of bad birthday luck.
  • Andrea: "I had to cancel the pizzas ... that is core memory trauma." (24:12)
• Esther and Jules share their own stories of exclusion: hiding in the attic, being teased for their weight or skin color, misunderstood childhood hobbies.
  • Jules: "I spent three months making a collection of quartz for my sister … My mom pulls it out, bursts out laughing, and everyone's like, it's just rocks from outside." (27:26)

4. Asian & Immigrant Parent Stories

• Andrea gets "passed" (i.e., accepted) at the Comedy Store, and Bobby Lee (her mentor) cries—though the group debates the authenticity of his tears.
• Jules’ mom is thriving after starting Lexapro, taking up basketball in her mid-60s, which leads to a conversation about generational athleticism and late-in-life pursuits.
• Discussion about the differences between Filipino/Asian and American approaches to community, support, and celebrations:
  • "Biggest party you'll ever go to is Filipino funerals … weeks long, food, drinking, dancing, karaoke." (30:27–30:48)
  • Reflection on how American life can feel isolating versus the deep communal ties of their home cultures.

5. Trusting Institutions & Disillusionment with America

• Esther and Jules discuss how their immigrant families put blind faith in American systems—often with unfortunate results.
  • Jules: “Our family doctor was molesting me, my sister, and my mom ... But then we were like, wow, the American medical system is so thorough with their checkups.” (44:09)
  • Disillusionment with the American school system, comparing isolating experiences here with the tight-knit schools of the Philippines or Canada.

6. Birthday Avoidance & Social Overcompensation

• Another theme: people who don't celebrate birthdays may have unacknowledged wounds. Those who over-celebrate may also be overcompensating.
  • Jules: "Check on the people who don't celebrate their birthdays. There's usually a wound they're not addressing." (29:03)
  • Andrea: "Every year I've tried again, it was always like, we're not coming." (29:33)

7. Titanic Deep-Dive

• Esther shares her obsession with a new BBC Titanic documentary (“Titanic Sinks Tonight”), sharing new facts, including how survivors weren't rushing to lifeboats because they didn't realize the true danger.
  • Esther: "If I was on the Titanic, I wouldn't be rushing to get in a lifeboat ... No one was rushing because we didn’t know it was going to sink." (33:16 – 34:04)

8. "Guess Who?" Game Interlude

• The group plays a long, funny, and increasingly chaotic round of "Guess Who?" using pop culture and podcast-internal references.
  • Game clues descend into hilarity: “What industry am I in? Why is that funny though? Why is that funny, you guys?” (56:17)
  • Legendary lines: “Thievery, manipulation ... I think criminal. Think of the words mythical, criminal, otherworldly.” (56:39)
  • Final reveals include Trisha Paytas, Kanye West, and Gordon Ramsay as answers.

9. Can Women Be Losers?

• Prompted by a viral TikTok, they debate whether "loser" is a gendered insult, what “loser energy” really entails, and if women can embody it.
  • Esther: “Don’t you feel like the word ‘loser’ is given to men a lot? You don’t hear it being thrown around about girls, women.” (48:45)
  • Andrea: "A pick me girl is loser energy ... so yeah, girls can be loserish." (49:14–49:23)
  • Nuanced takes: Accept everyone has “loser traits”; the important thing is they don’t consume your whole life.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Jules: “Your awareness means nothing. You learn that in therapy. You can know all about your problems and like not fix them.” (05:35)
• Andrea: “… awareness, but I won't ever do anything, like, what if I never do anything to it?” (05:46)
• Esther: “My sister, childbirth is very scary … Babies die or babies become handicapped during childbirth … or mothers die.” (11:58)
• Andrea (about being 'passed' at Comedy Store): “Rose was like, you handled that really well. That was a tough situation … I think I’m just going to pass you right now.” (21:30)
• Esther (about Filipino funerals): "If someone dies, we're like karaoke. Like, we go all out. The biggest party you'll ever go to is Filipino funerals." (30:17–30:27)
• Jules: "Our family doctor was molesting me … But then we were like, wow, the American medical system is so thorough with their checkups." (44:09)
• Esther (on birthdays): “Check on the people who don’t celebrate their birthdays. There’s usually a wound there they’re not addressing.” (29:03)
• Jules: “I spent three months making a collection of quartz for my sister … My mom … bursts out laughing … it's just rocks from outside.” (27:26)
• Andrea: “A pick me girl is loser energy … loserish.” (49:14)
• Esther: "If it’s not consuming you, it’s like, whatever. I don’t know. Right? … Whatever. We're losers." (53:23; 53:28)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [04:30] – Andrea’s ideal birthday: hiding away at a hotel, alone
• [11:58] – Esther’s “trauma text” from her sister about childbirth
• [21:30] – Andrea gets "passed" at the Comedy Store and Bobby Lee cries
• [24:12] – Andrea’s "core memory" of birthday pizza party trauma
• [27:26] – Jules' quartz rock gift childhood humiliation
• [29:03] – “Check on the people who don’t celebrate their birthdays”
• [30:17] – Filipino funeral parties and culture
• [33:16] – Titanic facts segment (lifeboats, urgency)
• [44:09] – Jules’ story about trusting American institutions and abuse
• [48:45] – The “Women can be losers” conversation
• [56:17] onward – Guess Who? Game segment and off-the-rails banter

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Episode Tone & Style

Candid, self-deprecating, and irreverent, this episode delivers classic Trash Tuesday energy: oversharing, rapid-fire commentary, and honest emotional revelations. The hosts and guests blend hard truths (about trauma, relationships, and identity) with jokes and well-timed roasts, making space for both laughter and genuine vulnerability.

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For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

This installment will particularly resonate with anyone who’s ever felt overlooked, stuck in their patterns, or longing for the community of childhood. It’s a potent mix of therapy-circle wisdom and offbeat comedy, delivering both relatable hardship and joy in the trashiest, slugg-iest way possible.

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Catch the next episode every Tuesday & follow for more S.L.U.G. content!

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Transcript

[Esther]

I hate mine so much. What industry am I in? Why is that funny, though? Why is that funny, you guys?

[Jules]

January 28th. Esther.

[Esther]

What?

[Jules]

The Comedy Store. Esther. Our live show. Dum Dum.

[Esther]

Oh, no. I'm gonna be giving birth.

[Jules]

This was your idea.

[Esther]

I know.

[Jules]

And I said yes too quickly.

[Esther]

We've both betrayed ourselves. But it is gonn so fun and magical and special and, like, one of a kind. Special night. We're also doing exclusive merch at the event, so if you're in LA. January 28th.

[Jules]

Slugs.

[Esther]

We cannot wait to see you at our live show. We have many exciting things planned, including all the people you see today. And more and more.

[Jules]

And, you guys, this is my only night out. This is my only. I've never been. I haven't been out in almost two years. Right, Jules?

[Esther]

Is true. It is true.

[Jules]

Yeah. This will be my only night out this year. I am making an exception.

[Esther]

We'll see you guys there. You get tickets at the link below. We can't wait, guys. We have a Patreon and we have new bonus episodes every week.

[Jules]

That's where you get the good stuff.

[Esther]

We'd love to see you there.

[Andrea]

Hi, Pingo. She did Escape Room yesterday.

[Jules]

Oh, she did? Escape Room?

[Andrea]

Yeah, she did.

[Esther]

Oh, my God, she's so cute. I need her.

[Jules]

Esther is not above kidnapping.

[Esther]

No, I know. I'm so capable. Oh, my God.

[Guest 1]

Go say hi to your second.

[Esther]

You are White donut.

[Jules]

Oh, my God, you're so cute.

[Andrea]

I have to clean her.

[Guest 1]

She smells good, though.

[Andrea]

Okay, thank you.

[Jules]

Let me smell it.

[Esther]

Wait, so you were saying that. Which I think is very fair, that you're frustrated when you have to be like, what's wrong? And the person says, nothing.

[Jules]

I don't like it when I have to chase for an answer. Like, if someone's temperature has changed. Yeah, but. But maybe I'm being unfair in that, like, they don't even know what's wrong yet, and they need a moment to process. But I'm already being like, what's wrong? What's wrong? Tell me. So I'm sure that's also annoying, but.

[Esther]

It is really sucky to be feeling like you're being treated like someone's mad at you. And then they're like, no, everything's like, that's horrible.

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Like, so that is a bad position you're in.

[Jules]

But then also, I feel as though I've possibly been that person who's like, a slow processor, where I'm just like, I don' really know what's wrong. I need A moment. And if someone's already jumping on me, then, you know, you're not ready.

[Andrea]

I feel that. I feel both of that. Yeah. Yeah.

[Esther]

Did you have a fight this morning?

[Jules]

Yeah, that's why I'm late. I also just want to say I love my partner so much. So, so much. No better dad on earth. But, like, dating, when you're a parent and I'm an introvert, I am a homebody. I am a thoroughbred introvert. When you just. A thoroughbred extrovert. Wow. It's like. It is. It. It is tricky because it's like, hey, I'm fine. Never leaving the home and staying with a baby and not having friends and just being a mom, and that's my whole identity, and I don't give a. But, like, that's not what makes him happy. And I'm just. Now I'm mad that that doesn't make him happy. You know what I mean? I'm like, why can't you just be home with us all day? Why doesn't that make you happy?

[Esther]

So last year, Dave and I, we got an Airbnb in Palm Spring Springs for a week.

[Jules]

Wait, around this time of year because of fires.

[Esther]

So we did that, but then we ended up doing it again. It was just a week of just us in Palm Springs. And, like, day three, Dave was like, are you feeling, like, a little, like, ah, I could use some friends? And I'm like, I'm doing great. Like, just me and you and the baby locked away, like, just making dinners. Like, I was so, so perfectly just set. And it was the same thing. It was like. But I was just. I just felt bad for him. I wasn't, like, mad about it. I was like, oh, that sucks. Like, I love this. And you don't, like.

[Jules]

But, see, you're healthier than me. I'm like, no, we all have our own. I don't understand why you don't just love, like, staying in forever.

[Andrea]

Yeah, No, I get that.

[Esther]

Right?

[Andrea]

Yeah. No, I was my birthday, like, two days ago, and then I just wanted to be in a hotel, like, alone, alone with the person that I've been, like, dating. And then he was. He was kind of like, should we go see a movie? I'm like, no, I don't want to. I want to be in. I just want to sit here.

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

Yeah. I want to order room service. I don't just want to sit here.

[Jules]

Yes, that's the dream.

[Andrea]

I don't want to go down to the restaurant.

[Esther]

Sometimes Dave will be like, well, could we watch A show. And I'm like, well, I thought we were hanging out.

[Andrea]

Yeah, I know. I don't want to stare at the screen.

[Guest 1]

Very extroverted though. Like he's like, he knows everyone in the building and he's just like, yeah.

[Jules]

He'S like friends with like my 90 year old neighbor. Now they only know him. They're like, what's your wife's name? They don't know me like at all. Cuz I never like leave. Right. But yeah, everyone building, like he's just like a, a sweetie pie like that. But then I, maybe I'm trying to like stifle him or something, I don't know.

[Esther]

But you have all this awareness of it.

[Jules]

Your awareness means nothing. Do you, you know, you learn that in therapy. You can know all about your problems and like not f them.

[Andrea]

That's true. I do that.

[Esther]

I still think it's a big step though, awareness.

[Andrea]

But people say that. But I won't ever do anything. Like what if I never do anything to it?

[Jules]

Can I ask you about it? Is it because there are people that truly like love their problems?

[Andrea]

It could be that. No, I don't. Maybe.

[Jules]

But it adds some type of like, level of like story and meaning to their lives.

[Andrea]

It could be that. But also I hate, personally, I hate change.

[Jules]

Okay.

[Andrea]

Yeah. So that in itself is enough to keep me from doing anything.

[Jules]

I think they say like that's a therapist's worst nightmare. People who are overtly self aware. But you can intellectualize everything so we think that that's enough. But you actually have to execute.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

You actually have to do the work to change the problem, not just say I am the problem now you gotta go stop being the problem.

[Esther]

I would argue that knowing you're the problem is still huge.

[Jules]

It is huge. Yeah. Because some people don't have that at all.

[Esther]

Yeah. Because you, when once you cross paths with someone who doesn't know they're the problem, you're gonna regret what you're saying and you're gonna run back to everybody that know they're the problem, even if they're not fixing it.

[Andrea]

I agree. Because at least they're not being combative. Yeah, yeah. They're not like fighting back and being super defensive. Yeah, I've had that. That's really bad.

[Esther]

But I know what you mean about like liking your problems. Because sometimes life without problems is really boring. You gotta, gotta get something stirring, especially.

[Jules]

In your 20s and 30s and like you don't really have, you know, you're grasping at straws for what am I gonna do with this life? What am I gonna. And so you're just like, really? Like, there's a girl that Jules and I know, and she will endlessly talk about how. What a horrible relationship she's in, but she will never get out of it. And I think it's. It's just sport at this point to, like, complain about him and then go back and forth with him. Right.

[Esther]

Yeah. I feel like everyone's had that friend.

[Jules]

And I told Jules, I was like, I think she just likes her problem. And honestly, you just have to accept it so you don't feel frustrated with them.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, at this point, I don't really care that much anymore. But, like, she's broken up with the guy like, five times already.

[Andrea]

Whoa.

[Esther]

So, okay, what do you do in that situation as the friend?

[Ad Read Voice]

Nothing.

[Andrea]

One of them has to die. You know, that's.

[Esther]

I don't know. But do you keep picking up the phone and being there or like.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, but I, Like, I. I just care less now.

[Jules]

You just stop investing. You're not invested anymore. You're like, oh, it's the same.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, I listen, but I just don't care. I don't care for the guy.

[Andrea]

Yeah. I kind of just start going like, oh, yeah, yeah. Well, you know, that's how it is.

[Jules]

Or. Sorry, you have just, like, your one liners. Oh, interesting. Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, bummer.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, you're good.

[Andrea]

You know, maybe just go out, go outside. Yeah, like, some stuff like that.

[Jules]

I'm here for you.

[Esther]

Just be a passive listener, basically.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Secure.

[Andrea]

Because you know they're gonna do it again.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

You're just like, okay.

[Esther]

So how did you guys leave it this morning?

[Jules]

I left it. I just left.

[Guest 1]

When they fight, everyone knows. Even when it's like, silent and quiet, I feel like everyone knows that they're fighting.

[Esther]

Silence is scary.

[Guest 1]

And my mom and I are just, like, always tiptoeing.

[Jules]

Oh, no, that doesn't make me happy. No, I didn't feel bad.

[Guest 1]

It's not like every day that you guys are fighting.

[Jules]

But no, it's. It's. It's. I will say, like, for syra. Parenthood, don't make relationship. Don't make any decisions about your relationship. You have to tell yourself, you know, I chose this person. I love this person. It's just early parenthood is. Is tough.

[Esther]

Also, I feel like you guys are so new.

[Jules]

Mm.

[Esther]

It's like, I can't even imagine, like, you guys are, like, still dating.

[Jules]

The advice you give about, like, no, just have a Baby with whoever. And you stand by that? Like, I'm like, do not tell girls.

[Esther]

Did I say that?

[Andrea]

Yes. Whoever.

[Esther]

Wait, did I really say yes? Delete the tape.

[Andrea]

Anyone?

[Jules]

That's bad.

[Esther]

That's really bad. I have to make a defense against you. Okay, so my sister, when she was little, she was diagnosed with this rare blood disorder called spherocytosis, which I had just deleted out of my mind because it's about my sister and like, who cares? When she had that, she had to be in antibiotics for 10 years. I was telling Kyle about this. Cuz anytime I have anything medical, I just have to. My nurse needs to know. Like it needs to go on my chart.

[Jules]

I'm charting as I. Yeah.

[Esther]

And she's like, esther, you should really be nicer to your sister because that's really like a lot.

[Jules]

And. But also this is after you said she had her whole spleen. Spleen removed, the whole organ removed.

[Esther]

But don't you figure if they could just take it out like you didn't need it?

[Jules]

I mean, there's a whole reason. You know how big the spleen is and it takes up a lot of your abdomen. There's probably a reason why it is also there.

[Esther]

Oh, so that's why she was skinny.

[Andrea]

Yeah, I was gonna say that sounds so skinny.

[Jules]

Like an extra rib, right?

[Andrea]

It's in the abdomen. That's where the skinny part is.

[Esther]

So I was thinking about, you know, you said you should be nicer to your sister. I'm like, I get it, but I don't know, something doesn't sit right with me.

[Jules]

And he also said she has Hashimoto's.

[Esther]

Yeah, okay.

[Andrea]

What is that? That's another beautiful woman. Sorry, I'm being insensitive.

[Esther]

So then I'm like, what am. Why am. I mean, what is it? And then you know what? No. My sister showed me her herself and why the things are the way they are. She texts me yesterday. Just a random text. I'm gonna pull it up and I'm gonna also say trigger warning. If you are pregnant or if you are anything to do with babies or motherhood. Just trigger warning for this because this is like really traumatic to read. Last text was my mom saying, I watched T.T. it was good. Which by the way, my mom. We have follow up questions for you. Then my sister, childbirth is very scary, which is why I did not want a third child. Trigger warning. That's me, not her. Babies die or babies become handicapped during childbirth or already handy had a handicap that wasn't known until their born or Mothers die. End of text. And I just write, thanks for this reminder, you psycho. Like, that's her torture, right? I might be like, oh, you're stupid. You're wrong. But she's like. It's like a deep, scary.

[Jules]

Is she on the spectrum?

[Esther]

I think so.

[Andrea]

She.

[Jules]

It sounds like someone who is just like, I gotta get this information to her, right? Like without any, like, ill, like, mal intent or anything like that. She's just like. Like, I need this. I need her to know this. In case you haven't. You don't know this.

[Esther]

No, I do. I do think she's on the spectrum and undiagnosed. And I. I actually do think that. And I. When I remember that, it does help me digest her personality because she's really weird.

[Jules]

Yeah. That is crazy. That would send me into a spiral.

[Esther]

I just needed you to see, like, it's a level playing field.

[Jules]

Yeah, Level playing field.

[Esther]

Clean or no spleen? Like, I think it's fair, right?

[Jules]

That's right. Sorry. You can have Hashimoto's and be really mean.

[Andrea]

What does the spleen do?

[Jules]

It breaks down red blood cells.

[Andrea]

It needs to be broken down. For what? For what?

[Esther]

For why?

[Jules]

Everything needs to be. Everything needs to be broke. Old red blood cells.

[Andrea]

So what's happening now?

[Jules]

Because you have new red blood cells, right?

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

The old red blood cells need to be broken down and then eventually processed by your liver. And then.

[Andrea]

So how does she break down the new. The red blood cells?

[Esther]

By being mean to me. By telling me this plane might crash. Just so you know.

[Jules]

Do you know planes crash?

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

And that hundreds of people die?

[Esther]

Literally, the flight is taking off. She turns to me, I'm just a little kid. She's like, sometimes when planes take off, they just blow up randomly.

[Andrea]

Oh, my God.

[Esther]

Yeah. I didn't stand a chance. To be true. No, no, they don't randomly blow up.

[Andrea]

Okay.

[Jules]

They don't What? I think they can.

[Esther]

What? Yeah, but guys, guys, we're not putting.

[Jules]

That out there in the new year.

[Esther]

Think about how many planes take off every day. Yes. No, no, no. Jules, how was your date?

[Guest 1]

Oh, I didn't go.

[Esther]

What? What happened?

[Guest 1]

I realized she just wasn't my vibe.

[Jules]

Oh, so you were like, nah, maybe.

[Guest 1]

It'S kind of judgy, but, like, on her Instagram, it's very like. I don't know. She wants to be like an influencer.

[Jules]

Influencer.

[Guest 1]

And I just feel like I. I just can't vibe with that.

[Esther]

What is the specific of wanting to be an influencer?

[Guest 1]

That you're she's always posting about her face, about her, like. Like, her things that she bought. And, like, always just her face or face her face.

[Jules]

Oh, that is an ick for you. I think with guys and girls, like, Jules is very, like, anti selfie, anti posting your face a lot.

[Guest 1]

Like, it's fine if you can post, like, a couple. But, like, yeah, every post is just that. And, like, I don't know. She just wanted me to chase, and I don't want to chase.

[Esther]

Oh. Oh.

[Guest 1]

I was just like, oh, I can't make it. I'm babies. I can't make it.

[Jules]

Use my baby as an excuse on a Saturday night.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, Doing like, an overnight. I know it sucks, but do you.

[Esther]

Have any other prospects?

[Guest 1]

No.

[Esther]

Wait, Kyla, you mentioned your mom was playing basketball.

[Jules]

Yeah, it's Alexa. Pro, dude. My mom started Lexapro and she just recently upped her dose and now she's, like, learning to play basketball.

[Andrea]

That's sick.

[Jules]

She's a baller now.

[Andrea]

That's cool, dude.

[Jules]

And let me say something. My mom's whole thing is, like, she raised two Division 1 athletes. And part of the reason why she did that is because she was like, I was too poor to have access to sports, yet I was put in a body of an athlete. Because my mom's exact right. And she always says, God, if I had your, like, privilege, she's like, I would have been an Olympian. And I'm like, well, like, would you have, like, you know this? But now she's trying to get into the WNBA. So now at 65, she's on Lexapro. And she's like, I have aspirations to be not just an. Like, she's practicing every day in her backyard. You know, all you hear is just the fudgeing backboard. Just bang, bang. And she's making the shots, guys. My. My stepdad walks out and he's like, that's not how you shoot. Because, like, her form's not great. She doesn't have a coach. And she's like, oh, yeah. And she's just making basket after basket.

[Esther]

How do you feel about this? Do you feel.

[Jules]

Feel?

[Esther]

Because obviously what's coming up for me is I'd be like, mom, you don't have time for your own hobbies. You need to focus on me. Like, is any of that happening?

[Jules]

No, I'm really happy for her. Like, her muscles have to be. I always thought her muscles were decorative because I'm like, how are you so jacked? But, like, play nothing? Because, like, when I had muscles, like, they had to work. And I'm like, you just look good. Just to look good, like, you got to be an athlete.

[Esther]

Are you and your sister both taller than your mom?

[Jules]

Yeah, my mom's five, six. She's still tall.

[Esther]

I could see, like, if I birthed to, like, tall, athletic daughters, I'd be like, oh, maybe I am tougher than I thought. Like, I would get into that. It would inspire me to. To join the wnba.

[Jules]

So I think I'm gonna try and find her like a senior basketball league or something. Yeah, or she can just like, of all the sports of basketball was, like, really not in my. Like, I would have never thought she would have chosen that.

[Guest 1]

She's so aggressive with the ball.

[Jules]

I know. That's what I'm saying. All you hear is that the backboard. I'm like, hey, you can shoot softly. It goes into the basket. It doesn't have to hit the board every time.

[Esther]

Strong.

[Jules]

She's so strong. She puts all her might into it.

[Esther]

You guys ever play with her?

[Guest 1]

Sometimes, but not.

[Jules]

Look at Esther when she hears about sports.

[Andrea]

Gross.

[Esther]

Scary.

[Jules]

Scary.

[Andrea]

And I know sports. I used to play sports, but begrudgingly.

[Jules]

What did you play?

[Andrea]

I played volleyball, basketball, and softball.

[Jules]

Oh, my God.

[Andrea]

But I didn't want to. That was the only way to make friends, though. Everybody. That was the only thing to do.

[Jules]

Were you good at any of them?

[Andrea]

I was the last to make the team. But good enough to make it. Yeah. So thankfully I. That was my thing in high school. But, like, I was the slowest on the team. And the balls always make their ways to my head. They always hit my head because my head's big. I have a big head, so it's just more surface area. And then it just comes to my. And then I always get hit in the head, and everybody's like, haha, it's so embarrassing. It's so embarrassing.

[Esther]

And I had to go to the nurse's office, which I hated. He hated it.

[Jules]

So you never played, like, dodgeball growing up?

[Esther]

Whatever you do in gym class is what I did. Yeah.

[Jules]

They played dodgeball, right?

[Esther]

I guess. I don't know.

[Andrea]

Yeah, that's like a thing.

[Esther]

But I had a doctor's note for swimming.

[Andrea]

Why?

[Jules]

Oh, because your ears. Your little ear tubes. I bet you were happy about that.

[Esther]

I was happy about that.

[Andrea]

I hate how swimming was mandatory.

[Esther]

I know. Why. How could they make you go in a swimsuit at school?

[Jules]

Yeah, that's a weird time too, because, like, your. Your. Your bush is all over the place. Yeah, it's like, very like, weird growth pattern.

[Andrea]

Yeah. And what am I supposed to do? Like, shave it? I'm not gonna shave it. Do you remember I'm a child.

[Jules]

When you first saw, like, hair growing down there? It was like. I remember the day I was like. Like, oh, my God, Bulbul. Like, it was scary. It was like, wispy patch.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

And you're like, oh, hell no. This is weird.

[Andrea]

Yeah, weird.

[Esther]

Wait, Andrea, what's been going on with you? Like, we haven't seen you in so long.

[Andrea]

You've been touring.

[Esther]

How's traveling been going?

[Andrea]

It's fun. A lot of traveling. What have I been doing?

[Esther]

Has Bobby been bullying you?

[Andrea]

Sometimes, but not as much because I've been away so much. Yeah. And then pinguas with Kalila and Aloha a lot. And Jules.

[Jules]

Well, did you.

[Guest 1]

Bobby said you got in the comedy.

[Jules]

Oh, yeah. You just got.

[Andrea]

Oh, yeah, I just got passed.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

I just got past.

[Esther]

Congratulations.

[Andrea]

December 30th, before the new year, so it was really fun.

[Esther]

How did it go? Like, what do you have?

[Ad Read Voice]

Like, a story?

[Andrea]

Oh, my God, it was scary. I had to follow Rick Ingram.

[Esther]

And then. That's so hard.

[Andrea]

Yeah. And he was, like, crushing. And then. But Rose, like, she. She wanted to put me in that situation to see what I would do.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

And then I. For immediately. First line that I say, first joke I say usually gets a laugh. Didn't get a laugh. And I would. First sentence. And I was like, oh, no. I'm, like, a little shaken. But. But Bobby said to me after. He was like, no, you handled that great. You weren't like. You weren't shaken by it or anything. And I was like, I just don't know how to act any other way. Like, even me being shaken is still me talking like this. You know what I mean?

[Esther]

One setting. Yeah.

[Andrea]

I don't know how to do it. But then people think that's like, oh, she's holding it together. I don't know how to do other stuff.

[Jules]

But.

[Andrea]

But then. Thank you. I'll take it.

[Esther]

And then did the set, like, did you win them over eventually?

[Ad Read Voice]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Was you felt good about it or did you.

[Andrea]

I felt bad because I. It wasn't a crush, like, because Rick Ingram was, like, crushing. He's really good. But he was doing a lot of crowd work, which is really fun for the audience, you know, and it's really.

[Esther]

Hard to follow that.

[Andrea]

It's hard. And then I did a little bit. Like, I did mostly material. So for material, it was. It went as well as it could.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

And After I. I didn't feel, like great about it. And before the set, Rose was saying she was gonna see me a couple times, so I wasn't expecting anything. But then after the set, I went outside, talked to Bobby, and then she. I went back to get my bag, and then she was like, oh, I'll walk out with you. And I was like, okay. And then Rose was like, like, you handled that really well. That was a tough situation. I put you in a tough situation. I was gonna see you a couple times, but you handle that so well that I think I'm just gonna pass you right now. And I was like, oh, my God. I got. Bobby's, like, over here listening. He's crying. And then I'm like, oh, my God. And then I look at him. I see him crying. I'm. He cried. It was really sweet.

[Esther]

Sorry to make a disgusting face.

[Andrea]

I know you're making a disgusting face.

[Jules]

It's. It's Bobby's, like, sincere, fake cry, but it's still crying.

[Andrea]

Wait, it's fake.

[Jules]

It's all always.

[Andrea]

Because it made me cry. And then I was crying, and then Rose was like. But she was. She was so nice. I love Rose. I love her.

[Esther]

She's amazing.

[Andrea]

Yeah. But she. That was so lovely. And she. She really gave me a fun new year surprise.

[Esther]

That's so cool.

[Jules]

So cool.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Is it worth crying over? I'm questioning especially for Bobby, but I am really excited. That's.

[Andrea]

Congratulations. I wasn't.

[Esther]

It is a big deal.

[Andrea]

Yes. I'm very excited about it, and I.

[Esther]

Do feel like everything's getting harder and harder and much more competitive. So it's a really big deal.

[Andrea]

Yes, I'm excited. And I heard you get, like, a pizza party.

[Esther]

Oh, I didn't get that.

[Andrea]

Oh, okay. Okay. Maybe I'm wrong, but somebody told me you get, like, a pizza party. But this is actually a good part of my story if I do get the pizza party. Because I was telling. Because it was also near my birthday. I was telling my friends about how when I was 10 years old, I had a pizza party. I tried to have a pizza party, but it got snowed in, and then nobody came. Yeah. And then all my friends called me one by one, being like. Like, oh, my God, we can't come. Like, so sorry. I hope other people. I was 10.

[Jules]

That's horrible.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

And it was, like, so snowy, and only I spoke English in my household. So my grandma was like, nobody's coming. So I had to tell my family nobody was coming. And then I had to Cancel the pizzas.

[Esther]

Oh, that is core memory trauma.

[Andrea]

That is.

[Jules]

Really?

[Esther]

Does that come up, like, every day for you?

[Jules]

Wait a second, though. But then imagine if you had an immediate pizza party, because this is when it was, like, atmospheric rain in LA and everyone would have canceled on your adult pizza party.

[Andrea]

No. Every time I try to have a birthday. Because January 5th is cursed because it's right after New Year's. Right after Christmas.

[Esther]

Tough.

[Andrea]

Nobody wants to do anything anymore.

[Jules]

Nobody wants to spend money to riot the next day.

[Andrea]

And then. Yeah, people wanna.

[Jules]

Altadena wildfires the next next day. Yeah.

[Andrea]

People wanna go crazy.

[Esther]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrea]

They want to, like. Like, do damage, you know? So they don't want to celebrate, like, a birthday. So then. And the weather is bad. Yeah. Snow, rain. But anyway, so every time I've ever tried to have, like, a birthday, it's always been, like, monsoon or something or, like. Or, like, snowstorm.

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

But then. So I had to, like, cancel the pizzas.

[Jules]

Oh, no. I feel like there needs to be, like, a redemption pizza party in, like, the biggest way.

[Andrea]

But that's what I mean. Like, I feel like if I do get at that pizza party, that would be cool.

[Esther]

That would be fun, but it's okay.

[Andrea]

If not, no worries.

[Esther]

If not.

[Jules]

Do you have any, like, childhood core trauma stories?

[Esther]

What do you. Don't even finish that sentence. My one big one was like, I. We were all at my aunt's house in Wisconsin. Hours went by, and I'm like, where are all the other kids? And I'm just sitting there listening to my boring mom and aunts all talk to each other for hours. Just come to find out. Like, they're all hiding in the attic, playing without me. My sister being the ringleader.

[Jules]

Like, just.

[Esther]

Everyone's playing without me. Yeah. That's horrible. And I. I feel like. I feel that all the time in adulthood.

[Jules]

Oh, yeah, Jules, what's yours?

[Guest 1]

I wore, like, shorts to school, and then all the boys and the girls in my class, we're just like, why are your legs so brown? Like, you look like. Like a monkey.

[Andrea]

Oh, my God.

[Guest 1]

But that. I was. I was just so ashamed after. I was just so ashamed with my color.

[Jules]

And you never wore shorts.

[Esther]

Of course not. Yeah, that's so.

[Guest 1]

And they would be laughing. It's like, what? Like, they were just like, the boys, like, why is it so dark?

[Jules]

You look like.

[Esther]

I think I've told this before, but when I was at this. The, like, public pool, and I took off my swimsuit cover, I heard girls from my high school go, I Didn't know she was fat.

[Andrea]

Oh, my God. Kids are so.

[Esther]

Well, at least I was hiding it.

[Jules]

Mine came from my own family. I. I was really into rocks. Like, when I was like, 7, 8, and 9 and I spent three months, it weren't just rocks. Don't roll your eyes at me, lady. I wasn't some dumb kid just like, rocks, rocks, you know, I knew specifically certain types of, like, quartzes and certain rocks that I found to be very. You know, and. And I would. I would crack them and find them. Yeah. And I didn't have a lot of, like, free time because my whole childhood was swimming, right? So I was like. I swam in the morning and I swam at night.

[Andrea]

I was.

[Jules]

I did school in between. So in my free time. So my sister's birthday is in July, probably right around, like, March, I started cracking rocks because I'm like, I'm gonna make this entire collection of quartz for her and wrap it up in a box and gift it to her in July. So come July, my whole family, like 30, 40 people, all the kids, everyone, she's opening all her gifts and she's like, oh, my God, thank you so much. And now it. It was my turn to give my gift. So I give her. I give her this big box, this big box of quartz, and she opens it and she's like, wow. And then everyone's like, what is it? And then my mom pulls it from her hand and she bursts out laughing, and she goes, oh, my God. She goes, it's just bato. It's just stone. It's just rock. And she passes it around and everyone is laughing that I gifted my sister just rocks.

[Andrea]

What the.

[Jules]

Just rocks. And they were like, is this kid, like, abnormal? She literally gifted her sister, like, rocks from outside. And I burst. I. I, like, ran upstairs and I cried, and I never went back downstairs because I was, like, too embarrassed. I spent three months. I could, like, cry thinking about it.

[Esther]

No, it is so sad because it's like, you were clearly so passionate about. I was like, this is why I.

[Jules]

Hate people with crystals because it's so triggering for me. Because now I, like, literally on people with crystals, I'm like, you guys are so basic and dumb. But then I'm like, oh, no, this is coming from a. A wounded place of, like, not being allowed to like rocks.

[Andrea]

I get annoyed when people do their birthday too crazy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I understand where that's coming from.

[Jules]

Wait, this is. I just saw this on Tick Tock where it's like, hey, check on the People who don't celebrate their birthdays because there's usually something like there's a wound there they're not addressing.

[Andrea]

Right.

[Ad Read Voice]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

Oh, my God. It's the same.

[Jules]

How do you feel people who celebrate?

[Andrea]

I hate them. Yeah. I'm like you over indulgent you self.

[Esther]

Yeah. Why do you deserve. Why do you think you deserve this?

[Jules]

Yeah, let's. Let's really dig into this because you're the same. You're just like, oh, my birthday. Who cares? So what happened to you guys?

[Andrea]

Well, those things like, yeah, yours is.

[Jules]

A pizza party is pretty extreme.

[Andrea]

And then every year I've tried again, it was always like, we're not coming.

[Jules]

Even if the weather was good.

[Esther]

No one's going to.

[Jules]

Do you celebrate your birthday?

[Guest 1]

Yeah, I always celebrate with.

[Jules]

We're getting to the bottom of this.

[Esther]

It wasn't. It wasn't. The weather's gonna come to her. We're not gonna come.

[Andrea]

Stop inviting us. We hate you. Yeah, stop trying. But anyway, sorry, Jules.

[Esther]

I think it's like more normal. I think you guys are just Filipino. And so you guys make a big deal about everything. Like, you guys, guys celebrate.

[Jules]

Hell yeah, baby. We celebrate at funerals. If someone dies, we're like karaoke. Like, we go all out. The biggest party you'll ever go to is Filipino funerals. Is.

[Guest 1]

You think one day so nice.

[Jules]

You get invited to a Filipino funeral. You have to go because it's like a huge celebration. Like, there's so much food, it's a rager. So much drink, drinking, dancing, karaoke, and you think it's one day. No, it's weeks long.

[Esther]

This is real.

[Guest 1]

Yes.

[Jules]

Yes. I swear. I know you guys, like sit shiva and I really like the whole idea of. It's really, like, meaningful. But no, like, we're loud and full of party. When someone dies.

[Esther]

That is awesome.

[Jules]

When I die, you're gonna do it up. Okay.

[Esther]

I have to get, like, a sparkly dress. Yeah. Prom themed. So I know I talk about this like every six months, but I have to bring it up again. We need to talk about the Titanic because there is a new documentary series on the BBC called Titanic Sinks Tonight.

[Jules]

Are you just on some newsletter about the Titanic?

[Esther]

I'm on an algorithm. Okay. Okay. And yes, I had to, like, buy an illegal VPN to watch it last night. It was very complicated. But it is unlike anything I've ever seen. It's a drama series, but it is shot like a documentary where they have actors sort of like giving their story. They're survivors of the Titanic, but it's based on, like, actual survivor accounts. So they're acting out, like they're being interviewed, like, in a reality show, like, how, you know, their person's sitting there, talk. And it is so realistic, and I'm learning so much.

[Jules]

Are they basic basing it off of real life? Life, people that.

[Esther]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Jules]

Okay.

[Esther]

This is. It's so real and accurate. There's never been anything like this before about the Titanic. Okay. And I've learned a few things I want to share. First of all, they don't show this in the movie, but there is actually a warning. The icebergs were ahead, but the guy who was, like, who received the warning was busy sending out telegrams or something, like, for the passengers, that he was, like, too busy to take the warning. And a lot of people were like, well, that was he it all up. But then when they look back at it, the warning didn't have, like, the proper code that says, like, you know, this is an emergency. And so he didn't treat it as such.

[Ad Read Voice]

Yeah.

[Esther]

So preventable.

[Andrea]

Okay, wait, he was, like, texting?

[Jules]

Yeah, he was the equivalent of texting at that time.

[Andrea]

Oh, my God.

[Esther]

Texting vibes. Wait, I need to look at my notes, actually. Hold on.

[Ad Read Voice]

Yes.

[Esther]

There's a lot we don't know.

[Andrea]

What was he saying to people?

[Esther]

Just literally messages like, ship is good, not no illness. Like, that was. It was like, four words.

[Andrea]

What's everybody doing? I'm so bored up here.

[Esther]

One of the big reasons, like, more first class passengers survived is actually because they had good relationships with the crew and, like, the people in charge. So they knew that it was. They were like, no, you need to go on lifeboats. And I've said this before. People call me crazy, where I'm like, if I was on the Titanic, I wouldn't be rushing to get in a lifeboat, because I wouldn't. It doesn't look good to get in a lifeboat. And this is what this show is saying, basically, that all the survivors are like, we didn't know. No one was rushing to get in a lifeboat because we didn't know it was gonna sink. Even while it was sinking. They're like, we didn't think it was gonna go down. Like. Like, it just. There was no urgency to get off the ship.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And for a while, they thought that actually was going to happen was people would get in lifeboats, be shuttled to a safe ship, and then the lifeboats would come back and, like, there would be so much time that you could just. It would be no issue.

[Andrea]

Get on whenever.

[Esther]

Yeah. They didn't realize it was going to sink literally within like an hour and a half.

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

It's like when your building is doing alarms and it's like, no.

[Jules]

Oh, I don't do that. No.

[Andrea]

Yeah. Oh, really?

[Esther]

You're right.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

College campus. If like I look at everyone who's walking slow like a. Wow. I. If I hear one alarm, I'm sprinting high knees high knees out of there.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

I'm in my car and I'm not even in my car. I'm driving the away in clay in case that thing blows up. I don't around with that stuff. In high school, someone like lit up like an M80 just like a firework in the tunnel. Everyone like ducked down like. Like, I thought it was like a gunshot. Me and my sister trampled over all of their bodies and like ran like blocks away from school. We're like, oh, we're out of here. Like, I don't around with alarms.

[Guest 1]

When the carbon monoxide was alarm went off at Tito Bobby's house, I wasn't really alarmed.

[Jules]

What's wrong with you guys?

[Guest 1]

But the Atikalai made me panic.

[Jules]

But before that, I wasn't really. I'm sorry I made you panic. If the alarm, which is a brand new alarm, is saying carbon monoxide leave. And I call the gas company and I said, hey, this is the. This is what it's saying. They were like, get out now. And I'm telling all of them. And Bobby's like, I don't smell anything. I'm like, duh, it's carbon monoxide. That's exactly why people die.

[Andrea]

You open a window, it's okay.

[Jules]

No, it's not.

[Guest 1]

Everyone was saying George Gilbert was like, just open a window. And then I think I was like, no, get it out.

[Jules]

No, I carry. Everywhere I travel, I carry a carbon monoxide detector.

[Guest 1]

You do?

[Esther]

I didn't know they made those.

[Jules]

They do? Yeah. You can buy them on Tick Tock. They're really cool.

[Esther]

Wait, so.

[Andrea]

Wow.

[Esther]

Was it a leak? Yeah.

[Andrea]

What's the real thing?

[Jules]

They couldn't even figure it out.

[Guest 1]

I don't know. But it was raining and there's so many leaks on the roofs. And I think one of the like, the leak was on the carbon monoxide alarm.

[Jules]

Oh, really?

[Guest 1]

And I think that's why.

[Jules]

Well, anyways, I called the gas guy and I'm like, you gotta go over there immediately. So he had to. But then meanwhile, and I'm like, everyone, please step out Take all the cats and dogs, put them in the car. And no one was listening to me. And I was getting pissed off. Like, more and more.

[Guest 1]

No, I was listening. I was taking all the dogs and the cats. But titubabi was like, I'm just gonna play my games. I'm not gonna die.

[Andrea]

It's fine.

[Guest 1]

And then at the clock, I got mad at him.

[Esther]

Yeah, I'm with you. I remember like a couple years ago, I was staying. I was at my parents house, but it was just me and my dad for a night. And I was sleeping in the basement. And there was this like, severe tornado warning, literally, for our area.

[Jules]

Well, that's so scary.

[Esther]

And I go upstairs, I'm like, especially.

[Jules]

Because you watch Twister was a big.

[Esther]

Yeah, no, I'm scared. Yeah, I'm scared. I'm like, dad, there's a tornado warning, doesn't wake up. Dad, there's a tornado warning, doesn't wake up. Like, I guess I'll just give up. So I just go back to sleep. And the next morning I'm like, you didn't. He's like, like, don't ever try to wake me up for that again. I'm with you, though. I'm. I'm scared of everything.

[Jules]

He's ready to be swept.

[Esther]

Yeah, he didn't care. My last Titanic fact, which I think you. I'm curious to hear you guys relate to it, is that a lot of the passengers were immigrants. This is a ship taking them to America. It's like, so fancy. And that it's. It's very common that immigrants have like this blind trust in American systems and institutions because they're like, oh, this is like the perfect, good right thing. So I'm just gonna like, trust it. And I feel like you've talked about.

[Jules]

Stuff like that before, where we really put like Western anything on a pedestal back then. Not anymore. Yeah, but back then you're like, oh, this must be the way. I didn't realize, though, that Titanic was an American vessel.

[Esther]

I don't know that it was, but it was taking them to America.

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Yeah. I don't know if it was like, European. I think it was America. I don't know. I don't actually know.

[Jules]

That's like the same way I feel. If I see a celebrity on the same flight as me, I'm like, oh, this is not going down because so and so is on here. The pilot's going to be more careful.

[Esther]

But didn't you feel like that, like when you. I feel like you've said in the past, like when your doctor molested you. Sorry to bring that up. You can bring the bananas out.

[Jules]

Please.

[Ad Read Voice]

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[Jules]

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[Jules]

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[Jules]

It's like, cool.

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[Jules]

Zero.

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[Jules]

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[Jules]

Soon you're able to get rewarded wherever.

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[Jules]

This show is brought to you by BetterHelp. You guys, the holidays are coming to an end. The new year is upon us. Quite frankly, this is a very tough time for a lot of people. I mean, certainly for me, where it's like, okay, what do I want my new year to look like? What changes do I want in my life? And just this whole transition period can be very tricky for a lot. So if you're thinking of giving therapy a try, try betterhelp. Maybe the new year doesn't require this.

[Ad Read Voice]

Whole new version of you.

[Jules]

Maybe just a less burdened you. Therapy can help more easily identify what weighs you down, what holds you back. And better help is quality therapists, therapists that work according to a strict code of conduct that are fully licensed in the United States. BetterHelp is one of the world's largest online therapy platforms, having served over 5 million people globally. And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 for a live session. Based over 1.7 million client reviews, BetterHelp makes it easy to get matched online with a qualified therapist. Sign up and get 10 [e-mail] TrashTuesday that's better. H E L P.com TrashTuesday this show is brought to you by BetterHelp. You guys, the holidays are coming to an end. The new year is upon us. Quite frankly, this is a very tough time for a lot of people. I mean, it's certainly for me, where it's like, okay, what do I want my new year to look like? What changes do I want in my life? And just this whole transition period can be very tricky for a lot. So if you're thinking of giving therapy a try, try betterhelp. Maybe the new year doesn't require this whole new version of you. Maybe just a less burdened you. Therapy can help more easily identify what weighs you down, what holds you back. And better help is quality therapist, therapists that work according to a strict code of conduct that are fully licensed in the United States. BetterHelp is one of the world's largest online therapy platforms, having served over 5 million people globally. And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 for a live session based over 1.7 million client reviews. BetterHelp makes it easy to get matched online with a qualified therapist. Sign up and get 10 [e-mail] TrashTuesday that's better. H lp.com Trash Tuesday. But that.

[Esther]

You just were like, oh, this is America. So this must be right. Like, did you.

[Jules]

Do you know this, Andrea?

[Ad Read Voice]

It's so sad.

[Jules]

Our family doctor was, like, molesting me, my sister, and my mom, and he was, like, sticking fingers up in places he shouldn't have have. But then we were like, wow, the American, like, medical system is so thorough with her checkups.

[Andrea]

Oh.

[Jules]

And so I just thought that. That Filipino doctors were just not doing what they needed to and that they should have really, like, prodded my.

[Esther]

But that's such a up example. It is.

[Jules]

It wasn't until I went to nursing school where they were just like, oh, here when you go, you go through, like, regular physical exams.

[Guest 1]

Oh, yeah.

[Jules]

I didn't know. I didn't know. I was just like, I guess every time I go to the doctor, I need a pelvic exam. And he was my. I didn't. I didn't. I wasn't getting a pap smear. Nothing. He literally fingered me every single time. What?

[Andrea]

Oh, my God.

[Jules]

But yeah. Oh. Hello, banana phone.

[Esther]

Jules, did you, like, have anything where you really trusted America and it was not correct to do so?

[Jules]

I think when I was just in.

[Guest 1]

The Philippines, like, whenever they. We would have, like, foreign exchange students from America, we would just always be like. Even when he was just, like, like, speaking in English, we would just be like, oh, he's so smart. He knows everything. Like, we would just be so amazed. And, like, his lunch would just be, like, a turkey sandwich and Ours would just be, like, adobo and rice. And we'd be like, that's so.

[Jules]

Like, it's probably bologna.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

And we would always, like, ask them, like, can we have it? And we will exchange it for our, like, Adobo or whatever. Pancit. And he was just like, no. And. But we would. I would just be so amazed.

[Jules]

Wow. It's all an illusion, though.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Because I grew up reading all of Sweet Valley High books, and it just really romanticized, like, high school here. And then I come here, and I'm like, well, this ain't it. What the Was that those books about?

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

I thought high school would be like High School Musical here.

[Andrea]

Yeah, me too.

[Jules]

Really?

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Because she had the same thing. Like, so growing up in the Philippines and then moving here, the culture shock is really having this idea of what high school is going to be like here and then being like. Like, oh, this ain't it. And it's so isolating. And, like, it was bad. Not fun, right?

[Andrea]

Not fun at all.

[Guest 1]

Wow.

[Esther]

Why did you think it would be like High School Musical?

[Andrea]

I don't know. Because I watched High School Musical.

[Esther]

Oh.

[Andrea]

And then I was like. But then I was in high school already.

[Esther]

Huh.

[Andrea]

And then I was like, this is not like that. What's going on? Where am I? Well, I was in Canada, so then.

[Esther]

I was like, is that where you're from?

[Andrea]

Yeah, like, Canada. And then I was born in China, but then I moved to Canada when I was, like, 8, 9, 10. Ish. Yeah. But I went to high school with, like, all Asian kids. We weren't doing High School Musical stuff.

[Jules]

The high schools here are so isolating.

[Guest 1]

I feel like it's so different in the Philippines.

[Esther]

What's different about it?

[Guest 1]

I just feel like there's so much, like, community and, like, people are just so much nicer and, like, just more fun. And here it's just. Everyone's just doing their own thing.

[Jules]

It's very nuclear here. Nuclear families, like, over back home. I think that was my biggest shock, too, is, like, you guys don't give your teachers Christmas presents. Like, you guys don't know your teachers. Yeah. There's no Christmas party. Like, every year we had a Christmas party with each other, with a whole school with other grades.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

And we did a gift exchange, and then we did a food drive. We boxed things up together.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Of course, there's always that, but the. Still just the overall feeling of community is so much deeper. Where I went to school, I feel, and over here, it was like, every man for Himself. And I didn't like it. So, like, even now as, like when I. Because, you know, my baby's so young still, but every day I'm like, should I go back home? Should I go back home? Should I raise him back home? Because I love. All of my friends that I went to school with in the Philippines are still my friends. And when I go back home, it's like no time has passed. Like, there's such an implicit trust I have in them because we shared this childhood that was so communal and tight.

[Esther]

That just checks out so accurately. Because it's like the whole thing with America. It's like there's no village, there's no community. Like, there's no unity. Yeah. It is weird.

[Guest 1]

I don't.

[Esther]

I guess this is like, so that billionaires can exist. So that's why we. They make us isolated. I don't know.

[Jules]

I think so. It's. It's for. It's definitely for some kind of workforce.

[Esther]

Yeah. Science.

[Jules]

That a woman is a loser. You want to go there?

[Ad Read Voice]

Whoa.

[Jules]

So it turns out women can be losers. Oh, my God. I didn't know this. I know.

[Esther]

Don't you feel like the word loser is really just. It's given to men a lot. You don't hear it being thrown around. Girls, Women.

[Andrea]

I'll throw it around.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

Yeah. Tell me who. I'll do it.

[Esther]

Well, there's this conversation on tick tock right now that's like, basically no. Women can be losers.

[Andrea]

I. I agree.

[Esther]

And we kind of need to, like, think about that.

[Andrea]

Can I say.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

What they kind of. What comes to mind for me? Please. A pick me. A pick me girl is loser energy.

[Jules]

That is big loser energy.

[Andrea]

Yeah. So, yeah. Yes, girls can be loserish. But what is it scientifically?

[Esther]

So basically, like, scientifically, one person's TikTok.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Esther]

If you have a friend that is, like, often comparing themselves to another woman, that's loser behavior. This is an easy one. But, like, if every conversation ends up being about a man. Yeah, that's loser behavior. If they don't have hobbies, loser behavior.

[Jules]

But that. Okay. Do you agree with that?

[Esther]

That.

[Jules]

Because you're very anti. Hobby.

[Esther]

I feel that I have all these in some way. Like, I do too.

[Andrea]

As you're saying them, I'm like, oh, no. I was like, oops.

[Esther]

So I feel very like I'm. I'm qualified. Talking about others for no reason. No.

[Guest 1]

But I love to, like, gossip.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

I'm sorry.

[Andrea]

I feel like, is this girl that's saying this. I don't She's a, she's celebrity.

[Esther]

But, but you guys, just because we all are relating doesn't mean that it's not true.

[Andrea]

Yeah, I think it's not true.

[Esther]

Cuz we all have loserishness.

[Jules]

Oh, I have some.

[Guest 1]

I'm okay being a loser.

[Jules]

Me too. I have some bum ass personality traits for sure.

[Ad Read Voice]

I'm a.

[Andrea]

No, I think we're all cool. Who is this woman that's saying this stuff? Who is she? Who is she?

[Esther]

Wait, and then these ones I think are, are bigger, better examples. But if like there's. If a person is celebrity obsessed. Although that I would argue too. It's like, well, just that's something fun. Could be a hobby.

[Andrea]

This sounds like a woman hating.

[Jules]

This is a very judgy.

[Esther]

Yeah, this not disciplined. And if they date losers.

[Guest 1]

I'm not.

[Jules]

No, I do not agree with the dating losers. I think as a girl you are bound to date several losers at some point and not realize it until you're out of them.

[Esther]

I feel like you guys are being way too defensive about this and like it's okay to be a loser a little bit.

[Jules]

Yeah, you're right.

[Esther]

Like, sure. But.

[Andrea]

But I feel like we're not being sympathetic of or empathetic of the woman's experience. I feel like everything you're saying is a female experience.

[Jules]

Especially comparing ourselves to other women. Like I feel like men do that. I feel like that has been done to us. Us that we now feel like there's something better we have to chase or something. I have to be better than her in order to be. That's something that they did to us. That's not something that we created ourselves.

[Esther]

As losers, sometimes we could take it too far.

[Andrea]

Yeah, sure. Yeah.

[Esther]

When someone does take this like loser, ish, jealous, competitive, whatever version of it, whether it's the jealousy, whether it's they have no hobbies or they, they, they're talking about others for no reason or they're dating, dating losers. Like it's almost like that then manifests itself into like you being a loser. Right? Like if you're so in on that, yes, that's loser behavior. But then it's like look at the rest of your life and like you're not doing well because you're too consumed. Right. But it's like if you're just like dabbling in being a loser, but you can still like get up, up and do the day and that's me. Yeah, yeah, that's me.

[Andrea]

That's us. Yeah.

[Jules]

That we dabble and loser behavior for sure.

[Ad Read Voice]

Okay.

[Esther]

But you still, like, are doing the thing and like, you said, like, use that juice to, like, get you from point A to point B and don't let it consume you. Maybe this is all nonsense and we're just, like, making stuff up as we go. But I do feel there's maybe something here. Yeah.

[Jules]

Because I. I don't necessarily. Like, like, my partner doesn't. We've talked about this. Like, my partner doesn't shit talk, like, ever.

[Esther]

Same.

[Jules]

But I'm like, I need friends that do. I need friends to have a little bit of a, hey, give me the intel. Because, you know, it's. Yeah, I feel like it's honestly self protective. It's like some type. It's gossip and that is like self preservation. You have to know who's the villain, you know, in the neighborhood. So you're careful.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Like, it's just intel.

[Esther]

Yeah. I think if it's not consuming you, it's like, like, whatever. I don't know. Right.

[Jules]

Whatever. We're losers.

[Ad Read Voice]

It's fine.

[Esther]

This is the Loser podcast.

[Andrea]

No, no, we're doing good. Everybody's good. Yeah, no, it's different. We're doing it differently. It's nice and cool.

[Esther]

We're just dipping our toe in. Okay, so we're playing Guess who.

[Jules]

Did you play Guess who when you were younger? I don't think it was a stressful game.

[Game Host]

We're going to need you guys to. Once the headbands are in position, just close your eyes for a second as they put the people on so you don't see it.

[Jules]

Feet.

[Andrea]

And is your head too big? Yeah, my head's so huge.

[Esther]

Mine too.

[Jules]

I'm like, I don't know if this is gonna fit.

[Game Host]

All right, we're coming in. So you'll ask one question and then the next person.

[Guest 1]

Do I know this person?

[Esther]

Wait, I don't know. I can't answer that yet.

[Jules]

Can you stand yours up?

[Game Host]

Oh, yeah.

[Jules]

Your dick went limp.

[Game Host]

It's a little top heavy.

[Andrea]

There you go. I still don't know what that is.

[Jules]

I do, I do, I do, I do.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

Wait.

[Esther]

This is fun.

[Game Host]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Okay, wait, what? How do we play? Okay, so the first.

[Game Host]

First person will ask one question and then the next person will ask a question. Right. About. About their person. You have to say, am I a. You try to figure out who you have.

[Esther]

Jules can go first because she already.

[Guest 1]

Is it a guy? No, no, no.

[Game Host]

Okay, next.

[Jules]

Okay.

[Andrea]

Is it a guy?

[Esther]

Yes.

[Andrea]

Yes. Oh, is it a guy?

[Ad Read Voice]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Okay. Is it a guy?

[Jules]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, right.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

It's a guy.

[Andrea]

Yeah. Okay.

[Guest 1]

Am I like, in the music industry?

[Jules]

Sometimes, but not really. Aspiring?

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Old?

[Jules]

Middle age.

[Andrea]

Yeah. Oh, middle aged.

[Esther]

Young. Middle age.

[Jules]

Am I extremely talented?

[Andrea]

Yeah, definitely.

[Esther]

Am I someone who. That. Am I talented?

[Jules]

What?

[Esther]

What the. Am I. Why is every Honestly.

[Andrea]

Otherworldly?

[Esther]

The is.

[Jules]

You got some. Some. Some.

[Andrea]

See, I didn't see.

[Guest 1]

I didn't see.

[Andrea]

The talent is. Is.

[Guest 1]

It's a bit.

[Jules]

It. It's legendary. Mythical. You got mythical talent, but almost, like, loserish.

[Andrea]

Yeah, yeah, like loser. Like thirsty loserish in the way that kind of. We were talking about it. Yeah.

[Game Host]

Don't give it away.

[Esther]

Okay, okay. Okay.

[Guest 1]

Am I like, famous on Tick Tock?

[Esther]

Yes.

[Andrea]

Yes. Yeah. Okay. Am I talented?

[Esther]

Yes.

[Jules]

Unfortunate. Unfortunately, though. Unfortunately.

[Andrea]

Oh, no.

[Jules]

Am I still relevant today?

[Esther]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrea]

Timeless. Yeah.

[Esther]

I fucking hate mine so much. What industry am I in? Why is that funny, though? Why is that funny? Help me know why that's funny. I would say.

[Jules]

Okay, let's be serious.

[Esther]

Let's be serious.

[Jules]

Let's think about what industry you're in. What the.

[Esther]

You guys.

[Jules]

I would say thievery, manipulation.

[Esther]

Okay, so I'm a criminal.

[Jules]

Yeah. Yeah, I think criminal. Think of the words mythical, criminal, otherworldly.

[Guest 1]

Is this girl, like, young, middle aged?

[Jules]

Oh, she's. Yeah, not middle. Yeah. Esther's age.

[Guest 1]

Okay.

[Andrea]

Is he canceled?

[Jules]

Yes.

[Andrea]

Oh.

[Guest 1]

Oh, she might win.

[Ad Read Voice]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Okay, hang on. Wait.

[Esther]

I had a hard.

[Jules]

Mine is hard.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Am I in a movie?

[Esther]

No, that's not your industry.

[Andrea]

No.

[Esther]

Am I a person?

[Jules]

You were once a person. You're once a person.

[Esther]

But then what happened?

[Jules]

A lot of things happen.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

What's like, her job? She's just like, an influencer.

[Jules]

Yeah, she's part influencer. Yeah.

[Esther]

She's big on Tick Tock. She's my age.

[Jules]

I want to take a stab at mine.

[Esther]

How the hell do you want to. I'm so curious what your stab will.

[Jules]

Be because you said he was extremely talented. Like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. So. And then you're like, that's it. And then you said that mine was hard, so I'm like, it can't be a celebrity.

[Esther]

Is he yours? Like, you should get.

[Jules]

They say.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Ask for race.

[Esther]

No.

[Andrea]

I was gonna ask. I was gonna word it like. Yeah. What is race wise?

[Jules]

He's black.

[Andrea]

Is it Bill Cosby?

[Jules]

No.

[Andrea]

Oh, you going?

[Jules]

Is he alive?

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Oh, heck.

[Andrea]

Never mind.

[Jules]

Can I guess?

[Esther]

Go ahead.

[Jules]

Is it Bill Nye the Science Guy?

[Guest 1]

No.

[Esther]

Oh, yours is hard, but good. Mine, it's like, I'm an Alien. Like, what am I? I don't like this anymore.

[Guest 1]

He looks like an alien.

[Jules]

Just keep asking questions. I think we can narrow it down.

[Esther]

Looks like. Is it Michael Jackson?

[Jules]

Close, but not really.

[Esther]

Laugh in my face. It's a man who used to be a person who is a criminal. Donald Trump. I don't want to play anymore.

[Game Host]

He's a thief.

[Esther]

He's a thief.

[Jules]

Remember, it's a thief.

[Andrea]

This girl's white.

[Jules]

Yes.

[Guest 1]

Yes.

[Andrea]

What industry is here?

[Jules]

Music.

[Guest 1]

You already have it.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

I think you know music.

[Jules]

Think about middle aged, canceled, Talented. Unfortunately black.

[Andrea]

Know any musicians? I don't know this one. You know this one. I don't really with music.

[Jules]

You with this one. I mean, you know, you know, you know. Ask one more question.

[Andrea]

Is he fat? Wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Jules]

Fluctuates.

[Esther]

Not really.

[Andrea]

Who is this?

[Jules]

This. Okay, let's keep going. Is he a real person or a character?

[Esther]

He's a real person.

[Jules]

And what industry is he in?

[Esther]

So he's had a TV show.

[Jules]

He has.

[Esther]

I think he kind of always has a TV show.

[Andrea]

Oh, tv.

[Jules]

Oh. So.

[Esther]

But that's not his industry really.

[Andrea]

But he thrives in the TV sector.

[Jules]

But that's not. He is not talent.

[Andrea]

He's very talented.

[Esther]

Not like an actor or a singer or a dancer, is it?

[Jules]

Now you got me thinking, like, the Price Is Right or some kind of host.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Okay, let's go back to you, Esther.

[Esther]

You guys need to just give me more hints.

[Jules]

Okay.

[Andrea]

Can I touch it?

[Game Host]

I don't know if that's gonna help, but.

[Andrea]

Okay, it's a person.

[Esther]

Give me hints.

[Jules]

Okay, here we go.

[Esther]

Switch to hint. Okay.

[Jules]

Yeah. Because yours is actually pretty tricky. Okay, so he lives in New Zealand.

[Ad Read Voice]

Small.

[Jules]

He lives in New Zealand in a very small.

[Esther]

The hot. Oh, is it Frodo?

[Guest 1]

No, close. Looks like an alien.

[Jules]

Wow.

[Esther]

You guys made me go.

[Jules]

What did you say?

[Andrea]

What the.

[Esther]

What the.

[Game Host]

Any guesses for the other ones before we reveal One shot?

[Jules]

I'll give you two clues.

[Esther]

Yeah, we'll give you guys.

[Jules]

Well, two clues.

[Esther]

She's been on this podcast.

[Jules]

She's been on this podcast.

[Guest 1]

I know her.

[Jules]

You know of her?

[Esther]

I don't think you know her.

[Jules]

Very polarizing.

[Esther]

She eats a lot on Tick Tock.

[Andrea]

Blonde.

[Guest 1]

Eats a lot. Blonde.

[Jules]

She names her kids like she's a Filipino person.

[Guest 1]

I feel like I don't know this influencer.

[Esther]

Yes. She has a famous beef with another.

[Jules]

Podcaster, but they're also family.

[Andrea]

Her name is.

[Esther]

She does Jules maybe not know her.

[Jules]

She does. Absolutely.

[Andrea]

I know who she is, but look at it.

[Jules]

Take it off and look. Look. Oh, my God.

[Andrea]

Who is that?

[Guest 1]

Trisha.

[Andrea]

Oh.

[Jules]

All right.

[Esther]

I know this game. I can't. I suck at this. Well, you won, but you guys gave me good hints.

[Andrea]

I can give you better hints.

[Esther]

Okay.

[Jules]

He has a kink for his girlfriends or wives, like being naked in public.

[Andrea]

Oh, my God.

[Esther]

Yeah, girl.

[Andrea]

I didn't know he. Oh, he is canceled. Yes.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

It's Kanye.

[Jules]

Yeah. But still respected.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Andrea]

Yeah.

[Jules]

You guys, don't give me good.

[Esther]

Okay. Yours is, like, at the top of their field. They always have a TV show where they're, like, telling people how bad they are.

[Guest 1]

He likes to curse.

[Game Host]

Wait, British.

[Jules]

Oh, Gordon Ramsay. Yeah. God, I should have said this. No, that's a hard one.

[Esther]

It's, like, a good one, but it's, like, you wouldn't think about him. Yeah, I can't keep playing this game. Okay, you guys working it. Gonna carry the rest of this episode into the Patreon. Thank you so much to our guests for being here today. Andrea and Jules. Anything you guys want to plug?

[Guest 1]

Nothing.

[Esther]

And see, potentially all of us. January 28th at our live show at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles. We can't wait. Tickets are selling quick, and we're gonna also have surprise merch there, so don't tell anyone. See you next week, Sam.