Peter Kim & Jenna Jiménez's Lunar Reset

Summary

Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn

Episode: Peter Kim & Jenna Jiménez’s Lunar Reset
Release Date: February 17, 2026
Guests: Peter Kim, Jenna Jiménez

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Episode Overview

In this lively and intimate episode, hosts Khalyla Kuhn and Esther Povitsky bring back crowd favorites Peter Kim (comedian, actor) and Jenna Jiménez (producer, cousin of Khalyla, and beloved “staff member”). The group unpacks themes surrounding Lunar New Year, cultural quirks and family dynamics, gender and parenting, relationships, queerness and representation in Hollywood, alternative medicines, and the messy realities of money and friendship. In signature “Trash Tuesday” fashion, there’s a freewheeling, confessional tone — unapologetically honest, humorous, and often touching.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Lunar New Year, Colonization & Calendar Culture

(01:55–03:00)

• Peter Kim questions if this is the Lunar New Year episode, jokes about being told to wear red.
• Esther points out Filipinos use the Gregorian calendar (“which is embarrassing because that’s nuts”), sparking a riff on colonization and New Year traditions.
  • “The idea that somehow the year starts, like, dead in the winter is so dumb.” – Esther (02:18)
  • The group briefly discusses this year's Chinese zodiac animal and its symbolism (movement, speed).

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2. Adderall Stories & Misdiagnosis

(02:47–04:00)

• Candid conversations about Adderall and ADHD diagnoses.
• Peter shares he was misdiagnosed and prescribed Adderall, which led to hyperactivity:
  • “I was partying. I was out at the gay clubs. Like, I was like, I’ll suck anything. I had never been so horny before.” – Peter Kim (03:29)
• Jenna and Esther share their experiences falling asleep with Adderall, leading to joking diagnoses.

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3. Parenting: Boys vs. Girls — Is There a Difference?

(06:17–08:36)

• Khalyla references viral parenting clip about the difference between raising boys and girls:
  • “Having a girl versus having a boy—it’s like the difference between having a small dog and a big dog…big dogs are harder.” – Kalila (08:21)
• Esther admits feeling like “an inadequate mom” due to the physical demands of raising a high-energy boy.
• The group shares anecdotes about rehoming pets and the parallels to parenting.

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4. Dark Family Humor: The “Dog at the Chinese Restaurant” Story

(09:33–12:31)

• Peter shares a controversial family story about his mom abandoning a dog at a Chinese restaurant due to cultural prejudices.
  • “She tied [the dog] to their gate and then we drove away. And I was like, what are you doing? And she was like, ‘They’ll take care of it.’” – Peter Kim (11:39)
• The group processes the story with horror and dark humor, connecting it to generational trauma around lost pets.

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5. Pop Culture & Social Trends: TikTok, Bob Wigs, and “Heated Rivalry”

(05:00–06:16), (18:10–22:59), (28:57–29:57)

• Discussion of TikTok trends (“activating the bob”), bemoaning being out of the loop.
• Introduces the new show “Heated Rivalry” (queer hockey drama) and its viral impact, especially among straight men:
  • “The trend is really like—showing that there are men out there that are cool. …They’re getting so excited about it because…it’s not even about the hockey—about how the guys are hooking up and being in relationship…” – Peter Kim (20:52)

Testing Partners: Are They Secure Enough to Watch Queer TV?

• The group calls their partners live to see if they’d watch “Heated Rivalry.”
  • “If guys don’t want to watch heated rivalry, then they’re secretly gay.” – Kalila (24:13)
  • Lighthearted, they all affirm their partners are chill (and “straight!”) for being comfortable with it.
• Tangent on masculinity, sports gays, and what turns them on about their partners being competent “manly men.”

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6. Representation & The Hot “Gaysian” Agenda in Hollywood

(29:33–33:25)

• Peter is mock-salty his name isn’t on the in-studio “Hot Gay Asians” list with Bowen Yang & Joel Kim Booster.
• Debate over whether there really are “so many more roles” for Asian/queer performers; nuanced, sobering take.
  • “We’re still going out for the same stuff.” – Peter Kim (30:40)
  • Jenna recounts being typecast and shut down in industry diversity showcases: “This is not inclusive in what it’s supposed to be.” (33:25)

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7. Hot Water vs. Cold Water, Cultural Adoption & Eastern Medicine

(33:43–41:01)

• Jenna, backed by Peter, insists on the joys of drinking hot water (and how it’s become a “Chinese TikTok trend”).
• Playful riff on cultural quirks, daily habits, and how “Eastern medicine” (acupuncture, cupping, herbs) is appropriated or misunderstood in wellness culture.
  • “Sorry, now you’re Chinese because now you’re drinking hot water in the morning.” – Peter Kim (34:19)

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8. Mental Health: Medication Experiences & Hospitalization

(36:46–37:52)

• Honest chat about antidepressants and anxiety meds (Lexapro, Effexor, Zoloft).
• Esther reveals her struggles with medication management in high school and psych hospitalizations:
  • “I missed one day and guess where I ended up? ... In a psych hospital. I’ve been in [one] three times.” – Esther (37:27, 37:35)

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9. Gross Facts: Maggot Debridement, Pinworms, and Medical Oddities

(41:05–47:58)

• Esther impresses/petrifies with her knowledge of maggot therapy for wound healing:
  • “Maggots are so efficient at eating dead tissue...” – Esther (42:14)
• Jenna introduces her irrational fear of pinworms; Esther knows all about the “tape test.”
• The group descends into gleeful disgust comparing maggots, pinworms, and their associations with men, relationships, and parenthood.

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10. Alcohol & Social Lubricants: Cultural Messaging

(48:06–53:39)

• Discussion of Dr. Oz (now a government official) stating that two drinks a day is “fine” for socializing.
  • “For someone in power to be like, ‘You guys are so stupid and so shy and weird that you must drink so you can go out and socialize.’” – Kalila (49:14)
• The group is skeptical—views this as corporate/lobbyist messaging amid falling alcohol sales and shifting generational habits.
• They share personal stories of alcohol use as social crutch and the dangers of messaging that normalizes/romanticizes regular drinking.

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11. Dating, Attraction, and The Tyranny of “Lists” & “Types”

(54:02–63:59)

• Discussion about societal expectations of beauty; women being “programmed” to look for more than looks:
  • “I don’t think I have a predisposition to loving uggos. I think society did this to me.” – Esther (54:35)
• Peter and Esther discuss dating across physical types, the pitfall of rigid standards, and Korean beauty expectations (the “fist face” phenomenon).
• Group debates making “lists” of relationship qualities versus being open and how types are “fake.”

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12. Nontraditional Families, Surrogacy, and “Borrowed” Babies

(68:09–73:46)

• Peter shares a Minnesota friend offered to be a surrogate (“I know. Oh my god.”).
• Jenna discusses lesbian friends asking to use her partner’s sperm. The group explores emotional complexity, “shared” babies, and feelings of exclusion or community.
  • “I think what happens is my brain has been, like, warped to really be very mindful about who you get into these lifelong contracts with.” – Esther (69:21)
• Tangent on freezing eggs—and who would fund Jenna’s procedure (hilarity ensues; potential Patreon tier proposed).

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13. Friendship & Money: Lending, Gifting, and “Trash” Community Ethics

(75:06–78:43)

• The group discusses the discomfort and intimacy around lending, gifting, and repaying money among friends.
  • “If I have it, why the here—” – Esther (77:19)
• Kalila’s story of Venmo wars with Jenna, the challenge of running errands for others, and keeping tab in friendships.

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14. Wrapping Up – Vulnerability About Love, Companionship & Starting Over

(64:41–68:07)

• Each shares perspectives on love, being single, starting over after loss.
  • “I love the work. I love the transitions from the high honeymoon phase to…the more grounded love. I love all the chapters of it.” – Esther (66:42)
• They ruminate on whether they’d date again, grow old together like “Grey Gardens,” or just get more dogs.
• Peter: “Being in a relationship...so much work. And it’s good, gratifying work. But…doing it all over again feels crazy.” (64:27–64:32)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “She tied [the dog] to their gate and then we drove away. And I was like, what are you doing? And she was like, ‘They’ll take care of it.’” – Peter Kim (11:39)
• “Having a girl versus having a boy—it’s like the difference between having a small dog and a big dog…” – Kalila (08:21)
• “If guys don’t want to watch Heated Rivalry, then they’re secretly gay.” – Kalila (24:13)
• “For someone in power to be like, ‘You guys are so stupid and so shy and weird that you must drink so you can go out and socialize.’” – Kalila (49:14)
• “I don't think I have a predisposition to loving uggos. I think that society did this to me.” – Esther (54:35)
• “I love the work…I love all of the chapters of [love]. I love that… I want that always.” – Esther (66:42)
• “If I have it, like, why the here—” – Esther (77:19)

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Recurring Themes & Tone

• Humor as Healing: The group uses laughter to process trauma, shame, and gross-out realities—making space for vulnerability amid “trash” talk.
• Cultural Pride & Critique: They simultaneously celebrate and lovingly roast their respective upbringings and cultural idiosyncrasies.
• Queerness, Gender, & Representation: The episode shines in its comfortable embrace of queer culture, calling out Hollywood’s continuing limitations.
• Real Talk About Money & Relationships: No subject is off limits, from the unglamorous costs of friendship to the psychological load of family planning.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Lunar New Year & Calendars – (01:55–03:00)
• Adderall Misadventures – (02:47–04:00)
• Parenting Boys vs. Girls – (06:17–08:36)
• Dog at the Chinese Restaurant Story – (09:33–12:31)
• Heated Rivalry & Queer TV – (18:10–24:22)
• Masculinity & Attraction – (25:19–28:57)
• Gaysian Representation Chat – (29:33–33:25)
• Hot Water & TikTok Trends – (33:43–36:46)
• Medication & Mental Health – (36:46–37:52)
• Maggots, Pinworms, and Medical Oddities – (41:05–47:58)
• Alcohol and Social Lubricants – (48:06–53:39)
• Beauty Standards & Relationship Lists – (54:02–63:59)
• Surrogacy & Community Babies – (68:09–73:46)
• Money Among Friends – (75:06–78:43)
• Reflections on Love & Companionship – (64:41–68:07)

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Final Thoughts

This Trash Tuesday episode lives up to its reputation: funny, unfiltered, generous, sometimes a little gross, and always real. Whether discussing Lunar New Year, queer sex on TV, the messiness of family, or the ins and outs of friendship, Esther, Khalyla, Peter, and Jenna invite listeners into their unique world—a place where shame doesn’t stand a chance, and “trash” is just another word for honest living.

Transcript

[Jenna]

I am paranoid of. What are they called? The things that I'm scared to get? Pinworms.

[Esther]

Oh.

[Jenna]

And so it's like an irrational fear of pinworms.

[Peter Kim]

What is that? What the. I see why you don't like her having bean hair. She gets nasty. You get nasty.

[Kalila]

No.

[Peter Kim]

Watch pinworm. Hey, slugs. It's me, Peter Kim. Thanks for watching Trash Tuesday as always. My comedy special is coming out on March 6th on YouTube. So like and subscribe. There's already trailer out, so go check it out. Enjoy the app.

[Jenna]

New year, new you. Perhaps in this year. Maybe you just don't want to smell. That's a really good goal and a goal that you can reach. So for that I have my pit stop. Go to buy TIA Jenna.com natural deodorant. No toxins, no aluminum, and it actually works.

[Kalila]

Honestly, skims underwear, that really changed the game for me. I love their fits. Everybody thong. I love their cotton. I just love the way that skims makes me feel. You can shop our favorite bras and [e-mail] after you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you. Select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the drop down menu that follows. You know, we have a Patreon.

[Esther]

I think it's the funnest place to be. I think you guys are missing out if you haven't already signed up for the Patreon.

[Kalila]

And every week when we do edit these episodes, we go, okay, you know what? I shouldn't have shared that. Guys, that's going to the Patreon. Okay? Patreon. Only because I'm too self absorbed to cut it completely. But it's got to be in a.

[Esther]

Safe space, limited audience.

[Kalila]

And if you join now, you will get instant access to a backlog of a year's worth of bonus content. So if you're just like, I got to have a really great weekend this weekend. Join us on the [e-mail] Trash Tuesday podcast.

[Peter Kim]

Is this the lunar new year episode?

[Jenna]

No, it's just you're Asian, so they just wanted to put that.

[Peter Kim]

I was like, I was given the note to wear red. I was like, what do I have in. Oh, you have a little red.

[Esther]

Okay.

[Kalila]

No, it is.

[Peter Kim]

It's a literature memo, but okay, what's that about to say?

[Esther]

I really do think, what is it in Filipino we do Gregorian calendar, which is embarrassing because that's nuts. I know.

[Kalila]

The.

[Esther]

The idea that somehow the. The year starts like dead in the winter is so dumb.

[Peter Kim]

Wait, so you're 1 1?

[Esther]

We're 1 1.

[Peter Kim]

That's crazy embarrassing, right? That's colonization.

[Esther]

It is at.

[Peter Kim]

Its like, wow.

[Jenna]

Okay, is it horse, Fire, horse.

[Esther]

Supposed to be like, the year of movement? The year of like.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, speed.

[Esther]

Yeah, speed. Which is like, oh, I don't like either. I'm.

[Peter Kim]

You don't like movement or speed? I like dying for movement. I'm die. I feel stagnant. I love speed. I love, like, I do. Have you ever done Adderall?

[Esther]

I did reel in my 20s, like, twice, and it did the opposite for me. It, like, slowed me down and kept me, like, nice and focused because I probably have.

[Jenna]

That's. You do? Then that means. Because when I was prescribed, like, 300R.

[Peter Kim]

In a month, you did it in a day.

[Jenna]

And I. Anytime I would take one, I would just fall asleep and my mom would go. That's how you know you've got problems because you took speed and you just. It's like falling asleep. It makes me, like, groggy zombie.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, I loved it. I got misdiagnosed ADHD and my psychiatrist gave me Adderall. And I was partying. I was out at the gay clubs. Like, I was like, I'll suck anything.

[Jenna]

We're sucking, sucking, sucking, sucking. For real.

[Peter Kim]

I had never been so horny before.

[Jenna]

Wow.

[Peter Kim]

It was crazy. And then my friends were like, I don't think you have adhd, because that's like, when you know.

[Jenna]

Yeah, mis.

[Peter Kim]

Prescribed. And I'm like, I can't concentrate on anything, you know, making up.

[Kalila]

So can we introduce. We have back by popular demand, Peter Kim, who I knew was gonna be the audience's new favorite person. And I'm so glad that the audience did agree. You belong here.

[Peter Kim]

I love. Oh, thank you, guys. I've always wanted to be in a sorority.

[Kalila]

This is not a good one.

[Peter Kim]

That's my type.

[Jenna]

We're gonna be rushing tomorrow, so I'm ready. Okay.

[Kalila]

And then we have. Of course.

[Jenna]

Are you introducing me?

[Kalila]

I guess.

[Jenna]

Okay.

[Kalila]

My cousin. My cousin Jenna. Your worker. Our prim. The staff member who's also loved by our audience.

[Peter Kim]

Yes. Audience fave.

[Jenna]

Their nickname for me is Lord Farquhar. Farquaad.

[Peter Kim]

Lord Farquaad. Because of your hair.

[Esther]

Oh, you got it. Oh, you got it. You got it.

[Peter Kim]

No, that was hard. Are you seeing the activating the Bob trend on TikTok?

[Esther]

Yes.

[Kalila]

I don't.

[Peter Kim]

I want to get a Bob wig.

[Jenna]

I'm not on TikTok. I don't know.

[Peter Kim]

You're missing out. You need to get Off.

[Jenna]

I am. You guys have to teach me. I don't know how to do it.

[Kalila]

To download an apple.

[Jenna]

I downloaded it.

[Peter Kim]

Then just watch.

[Esther]

I know.

[Peter Kim]

Like, just watch.

[Esther]

Instagram reels is just very like. I mean, it's catching up a little bit faster now, but still, it's like, oh, no, no. You got to get on the. Activate the bob.

[Peter Kim]

I want to get a bob just to do that.

[Esther]

I know it's mine.

[Jenna]

Good enough to do it?

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, you're perfect.

[Jenna]

What do I have to do? Daddy, will you teach me how to TikTok? Teach you? Teach you how to TikTok?

[Esther]

I feel like a dougie is one of the dances that has, like. It's like evergreen.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, yeah.

[Esther]

People are still trying to nail it. And arg. About the Dougie. About. Here we go. Here we go.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

You were born for this. And there are more subtle ones. There's, like, people who do it. Like, real subtle.

[Kalila]

This is so good.

[Peter Kim]

This is amazing.

[Kalila]

Who invented this? Like, this is so good.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah. Oh, my God. Put a bob wig on your.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

And then twerk it and activate the.

[Jenna]

You're gonna run my TikTok.

[Peter Kim]

I will.

[Jenna]

I know you don't want to, but you will.

[Esther]

He's gonna injure you.

[Peter Kim]

Maybe.

[Kalila]

Is this gonna. This might be offensive. Every episode, I have something where I'm trying to offend you.

[Esther]

End up on black Tick tock again. Yes.

[Kalila]

No, no. It's.

[Peter Kim]

Get you back on.

[Kalila]

So there's this clip that's going viral where he's like, when I first had my daughter, I thought me and my wife thought we were amazing parents. He's like, we would look at other parents who'd be chasing their two little boys around and be like, what are they doing wrong? Like, we need to. Do they need help from us? And he's like, then we had two boys, and we realized there's a big difference between having a girl and a boy. And obviously, I'm terrified when I see that clip, because I do. I will confess, I have, like, a very easy child.

[Jenna]

Yes. Thank you for confessing that.

[Kalila]

Thank you.

[Esther]

Honestly, that makes me feel convalidated because when you tell other mothers on air, you're like, no, they're just like a doll from age so and so.

[Kalila]

And I'm like.

[Esther]

My baby is trying to rip shit up.

[Kalila]

Like, no, I'm super aware of the privilege of, like, she is so easy.

[Jenna]

She really.

[Kalila]

And, like, I was not an I. It's. It's out of nowhere, right? Because, like, I was not an easy Baby. Like my baby really reminds me of my mom. Like I think she's either that or my mom is just like a one year old. I'm not sure. But like she just is so calm and chill. I mean she's not like, you know, she still screams and gets like, like whatever how. But anyways, she still herself. Yes.

[Esther]

Boys are physical, right? They are bouncing off. They need to slam things, they need to throw things, they need to pull things, they need to climb, they need to bites things.

[Jenna]

He will, he starts shooting the floor when I was there.

[Esther]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jenna]

I'm like, that's homie. That's the floor.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

He needs to make sure.

[Jenna]

He's like, is it, is it, is it?

[Esther]

This is where I feel like such an inadequate mom too. Cuz I'm like, God, I'm the worst parent ever. I cannot keep up with him. And that's why I need like backup. And you're always like, oh, why do you always need two people there? Those two people will tell you we need a third. Like we need an extra tank of gas. Okay.

[Jenna]

I can say I feel like even if you had an easy baby, you would still want a second. Just to make sure.

[Kalila]

Yeah. Breathing.

[Esther]

Yeah. So. But in case one of them croaks.

[Kalila]

So I've come up with my analogy, which I don't know if this is offensive or not, but I think that it is. Having a girl versus having a boy. It's like the difference between having a small dog and a big dog. It's like people love their small dogs and their big dogs equally.

[Esther]

Right.

[Kalila]

Like each person is as happy and as is in love and is getting all the everything out of it. But it's like the big dog is harder. The are bigger. It's like if they jump up, it's a problem. Whereas like if a small dog jumps up, it's like, who cares? Like that's like how I'm viewing it.

[Jenna]

Although some people do return their bigger dogs more.

[Esther]

Yeah. Because they're less tolerant of.

[Jenna]

I have friends who are in the process of returning their dog because they had a small dog.

[Esther]

Were they returning them too?

[Jenna]

They're, they're not returning it. They're trying to find, they're trying to re home.

[Kalila]

Do you ever consider rehoming?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah. Are you rehoming your son maybe?

[Esther]

No, no, no, no, no. But I get mad at like people who like return dogs to shelters. I like want to fight them.

[Jenna]

No, they're not returning it to shelter. They're okay. They're like raising, they're Returning it to Craigslist. And they're trying to.

[Peter Kim]

I gotta rehome them.

[Esther]

You gotta re. Homer.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And I love your. And she's a girl, right?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Esther]

She's beautiful. And she's a big dog.

[Peter Kim]

She's like £40.

[Esther]

Oh, yeah. Midsize.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah. She's gorge.

[Esther]

She's gorgeous.

[Peter Kim]

I know. She's. Can I tell you a crazy story? Now that it's Chinese New Year or Lunar New Year, this. This is going to be offensive, and I'm very sorry to the Chinese community and the dog community. I'm just going to say that right now, two are the biggest communities.

[Esther]

Stop right there. You've said it.

[Peter Kim]

No, truly. They're the most passionate and actually, largest communities. But my mom is Korean. She's conservative immigrant, so she is. I wouldn't say she's racist, but she does have a preference. And her lowest preference is Chinese. She has the worst. I know it's Lunar New Year. I know it's new. But she does not have a good view of the Chinese, nor do many Koreans. And not to excuse her, but when my mom and dad divorced, my dad had custody of us for, like, a year because of some up situation. I know it was really up. And my mom, when she came back, realized that my dad allowed us to have a dog. And she was like, this. We cannot have this dog here. Anyway, my mom comes back in, and she was like, we have to get rid of this dog. I was like, no, we can't. She was like, you bet. You have one week to find one of your friends to take this dog. So I go to school and I ask every friend to take this dog, and no one wants the dog.

[Kalila]

I'm gonna die.

[Peter Kim]

And I come back, and my mom's like, well, we have to get rid of it. I was like, we cannot take it to the shelter. They're gonna kill it. We cannot take it to. And she was like, fine, we won't take it to the shelter, but I'll bring it to somewhere that they will.

[Jenna]

Take care of somewhere.

[Peter Kim]

So she took it. She took us and the dog to a Chinese restaurant.

[Jenna]

I'm not. I'm not assuming anything. I'm not assuming anything.

[Peter Kim]

No. She tied it to their gate, and then we drove away. And I was like, what are you doing? And she was like, they'll take care of it.

[Kalila]

Are you okay? I'm not okay.

[Esther]

Oh, my God.

[Jenna]

I think you're suffering from that Chinese family.

[Esther]

Probably, like, oh, probably took it.

[Peter Kim]

It was Chinese restaurant.

[Esther]

A restaurant.

[Jenna]

He said, let me Just speak.

[Peter Kim]

And the underlying.

[Esther]

Yeah, of course.

[Peter Kim]

Thing was that they'll take care of it.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

You know, I bet somebody saw the dog. What city was.

[Jenna]

For sure.

[Peter Kim]

Flushing, Queens.

[Kalila]

Oh, somebody in New York saw the dog.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Let's tell ourselves that story. Because the alternative is, like, too much for me. I'm gonna go.

[Peter Kim]

Sorry to pick it up.

[Jenna]

Honestly.

[Peter Kim]

No, but that's just highlighting how. How hateful she was towards the Chinese.

[Kalila]

Similar story from her childhood that, like, I feel that. I feel it in my bones, like, about a childhood pet that they had and that I forget who, but if it was her dad or someone took it to the shelter, they're like. They were moving and they're like, we can't have it. And then, like, they went to find it and it was gone.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, no.

[Kalila]

And when my mom told me that story, I was like, I'm never. I. Oh, that's got to be suppressed for everybody. That's generational damage for all of us. It's.

[Peter Kim]

So sorry. Now you have to live with my story and your audience.

[Esther]

No.

[Kalila]

You know what is about laughing and also crying.

[Jenna]

And let me tell you, if I know anything about restaurants is that my people work in them somewhere. Yeah, I know it was a Chinese restaurant, but I'm telling you, some Mexican.

[Peter Kim]

Yes.

[Jenna]

Found that dog first and gave it a good home. Gave it a good home. And then there were. And it had lots of babies and they kept all of that.

[Esther]

May I also say the Chinese people probably took them in and were nice to that dog. It's just, you know, they. They probably did.

[Jenna]

What's that that you're using?

[Esther]

You want some?

[Kalila]

Is it Clint Black, honey?

[Esther]

It is.

[Kalila]

Oh, my God. It's so that. Did you get it because of Tick Tock?

[Esther]

I did. With that one girl in the car. And she's like, this is what Liv Tyler wore. And, like.

[Kalila]

Yeah, that one. It's having such a moment. It's like a 90s color staple. Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, wow.

[Jenna]

Yeah, we.

[Peter Kim]

So it's like a purplish.

[Esther]

Oh, I'm sorry about that. That's not. It's not. Let me see.

[Peter Kim]

No.

[Esther]

Red.

[Peter Kim]

The color that we were supposed to wear today. Speaking of, Chris Redd did a interview with TMZ where he, like, told his side of the story because there were.

[Jenna]

All these, like, I don't even know the story.

[Peter Kim]

Rumors that he had. It's not even a rumor. He's. He actually dated Keenan's ex.

[Esther]

Okay.

[Kalila]

We're talking about Chris Redd from snl.

[Peter Kim]

From snl, and Keenan from SNL was.

[Kalila]

So they were exes.

[Peter Kim]

They were already exes.

[Kalila]

Okay.

[Peter Kim]

And then they started dating, but apparently it was an issue. I don't think Chris ever, like, addressed it because, like, why would you address something like that?

[Kalila]

Yeah, this was years ago.

[Peter Kim]

Years ago. But I thought he did a really great job and, like, an emotional job, like, saying, like, this person really stood by me and they were not together. And of course that's not what we want. But you don't. You know, it's the whole, like, you can't help who you fall in love with.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Type of situation. Like, have you guys ever dated a friend's ex?

[Esther]

Oh, no. That's so disgusting territory for me.

[Jenna]

But.

[Kalila]

I thought that the drama was that. That it was. They were together. And if it was your ex, I don't know that it's worth making this big story out of it.

[Jenna]

And how many years an X.

[Peter Kim]

Like, I don't know of the details of how many years, but clearly there was something unresolved from.

[Kalila]

And also, we don't know. I mean, I understand that they're in. They were working on the same show, Keenan and Chris, but, like, are they best friends? Like, we don't know that. They're also.

[Jenna]

We don't.

[Kalila]

How close are they?

[Esther]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jenna]

We don't know that anything necessarily was an issue other than the fact that one person didn't like that another person who was in their same circle or community was dating their ex. Because that can also just be an issue because of feelings and emotions.

[Esther]

Have you ever dated a friend's ex?

[Peter Kim]

No, but I have fantasized in the shower about going off on someone who would date my ex.

[Esther]

I have, like, revenge fantasies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That I can really relate to.

[Peter Kim]

Yes. Because I'm petty. I feel like if someone went out with my ex and you're my friend. You did that on purpose.

[Kalila]

Interesting.

[Peter Kim]

You did that on purpose. You knew what the was going. It's never happened.

[Esther]

If you want it to happen to me. Oh, my God.

[Peter Kim]

Like, I want to.

[Esther]

I'm.

[Jenna]

Stay away from all your exes.

[Kalila]

So.

[Esther]

Oh, my gosh.

[Peter Kim]

Would ever take my ex. But I'm like, oh, God, please somebody.

[Jenna]

Now that you have hair, girl.

[Kalila]

Yes.

[Esther]

I dated this really shitty person and he was a tattoo artist and he beat me at the end of the relationship. And he's a full blown classic Hallmark narcissist, all of the things. When him and I broke up, one of it was still MySpace years. This girl, and she was gorgeous, like, started to, like, befriend Me. And she was like, hey, I'm really sorry about your breakup. I saw your MySpace, like, thing a status change or whatever. Whatever.

[Jenna]

No longer your time.

[Esther]

Yeah, he's no longer in your top eight. Top 16, whatever.

[Kalila]

Been waiting.

[Esther]

And we really, like, struck a friendship. And of course, like, I couldn't, like, you know, say no to a friendship with a really pretty girl. I was like, oh, this girl's so pretty.

[Jenna]

Whatever.

[Esther]

So she would notice this. She was from San Francisco, by the way. And then she would fly to Long beach, and we would, like, you know, just be. We were, like, in the early budding friendship, like, I think. I don't know why we stopped talking, but I. I felt like one. During one of her trips, I kind of got the ick. I was like, oh, I don't think this girl could actually be my friend. There's something, like, off about her. Three months later, she was with my ex, that tattoo artist, and then she, like, moved down here to, like, be with him. And the whole time, mind you, I had vented to this girl so much because the breakup was so new, right? And she took everything I said and said, okay, I'll have him. But then in my head, I'm like, have at it, homegirl. Like, please. He was such a piece.

[Jenna]

And it wasn't even a real friendship.

[Esther]

No. I was so disgusted. Just like, I'm like, ew.

[Peter Kim]

She knows all the ins and outs.

[Esther]

But then, you know, obviously, like, they broke up and stuff. But still, I was just like, who does that?

[Peter Kim]

Disgusting.

[Esther]

That's weird. That's some, like, weird, like, king pathological that I can't, like, that's next level.

[Jenna]

Because that's not only intentional. That's, like, premeditated thought of plan.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

She was using you to get to your own.

[Esther]

Thankfully, it was an act. Like, I didn't give a about. Thankfully, it was an ex that was. I was already in another, like, relationship that. With, like, a really kind person. And so I'm so glad that it was that X where I'm like, all right, you want a closeted gay man to, like, beat you? Go for it.

[Peter Kim]

Closet. A gay man.

[Esther]

Still closeted.

[Jenna]

Heated rivalry.

[Peter Kim]

Wait, what?

[Esther]

You just found out about heated rivalry? So I've never seen it, and you guys are hyping it up. And I feel really bad for shutting down Jenna because we were all like, what are you talking about?

[Kalila]

She was the first. We were making fun of her.

[Esther]

But then, okay, I watched this show a long time ago, and I was obsessed with this one actor because he played it was like a show about the Catholic church. But he was the hottest guy in the show. And I just found out he is in heated rivalry. His name is Francois Arnaud.

[Peter Kim]

Hello. Scott Hunter from the New York team.

[Jenna]

Won the fucking championship.

[Peter Kim]

Maybe kiss on the ice.

[Kalila]

Okay. I want to say I watched 30 seconds of it last night and within. Just listen. Within 30 seconds I was like, this is. That was the hottest scene I've ever seen. That scene. The opening scene. The two men just outside, dressed so good, look so hot. It's like right out the gate. It's there.

[Peter Kim]

Yes.

[Esther]

Okay, I have a question. Because I had planned. I'm saving this, right? Because I'm a mom and I can't watch all. I can't binge anymore. So I was gonna watch this alone because I'm like, this is a show I need to watch alone. But then you think that was a show that Aloha and I could watch together or no, is it like an alone thing?

[Peter Kim]

There's an entire revol solution happening with straight men. It's becoming where the, like, divide of, like, can you watch and comment without being icked?

[Jenna]

Thank you.

[Peter Kim]

And if you can't, you're gay. That's what it could come down to because it's showing all these like, positive versions of masculinity on Tick Tock now because of the show. Like, because there's a whole Filipina and Boston, no New Jersey white guy couple on Tick Tock. She forces him to watch and he's watching from here. And she's like this kind of off camera. You could only see her nose and her eyes. And he's commenting the entire time. He's like, yeah, get in them cheeks. Crack them in the cheeks. So good. He's admittedly, like, holding one of her boobs because he's like, I'm. I'm secure with my sexuality, but, like, I gotta hold the tit while I watch this, you know, like. And it's so. It's so endearing.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

The trend is really like, like showing that there are men out there that are cool. And there's this whole podcast called the Empty Netters, which is two or three ex hockey players who have a podcast and this happens to just now be vogue. And now they're able to comment on it. And they're getting so excited about it because it's not even about the hockey, about how the guys are hooking up and being in relationship with each other and how they're so excited for them. And it's never been a Thing that straight guys could comment in culture.

[Esther]

I love this.

[Jenna]

It's actually really cool in the sports world.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

I love that they doubled down with a very masculine, like, macho. We fight on the yes.

[Esther]

Field.

[Jenna]

Whatever. That ice. Ice thing. We fight on the ice field.

[Peter Kim]

Also is, like, the gayest I know rink.

[Jenna]

I'm like, jeez, like, you're just fighting.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

But I will say that whenever I argue with a straight heterosis male about watching any type of queer sex that has to do with men, they don't understand. They feel like, oh, well, you're forcing me to watch this. And I wouldn't have watched this on my own. And I'm like, you know how many queer people have been forced to watch hetero all day their entire lives? Disney, like, from the time they're Disney, is their children more like straight love stories, you know, Because. Because Heated rivalry is. There's so much love and there's friendship and there's communication. Oh, don't even get me started.

[Esther]

Call aloha and see if he'll watch it with me.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, you guys. Okay. He has to watch it with you. And if he doesn't cry at episode five.

[Esther]

Okay, okay. Then he's gay.

[Jenna]

Some.

[Peter Kim]

No, he's not gay. He might be bicurious. No, it's just a really tender show that surprised all of us. We thought it was just gonna be smut, and then it turned out to be, like, actually great.

[Esther]

Okay, let's. Let's see if you watch it with me.

[Peter Kim]

Does he answer?

[Esther]

Babe, will you watch this new show with me when we. When I get home? Yeah, it's about. It's called Heated Rivalry. It's on hbo, and it's about a hockey team and. And lots of hot, steamy gay sex.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, she. Perfect.

[Jenna]

Okay, he's straight.

[Kalila]

Okay.

[Esther]

Okay, babe, thank you. We'll watch you later.

[Peter Kim]

All right.

[Esther]

Okay, great. Bye.

[Kalila]

Should I test Dave?

[Esther]

Yeah, yeah, right now, please. He's so not phased by, like, gay anything.

[Kalila]

Good.

[Esther]

If I ask him, I'm like, would you hook up with a dude? And he was like, hello, Dave?

[Kalila]

Yeah. I have a question.

[Peter Kim]

Am I. Are you recording?

[Kalila]

Yeah. Okay. Would you be.

[Peter Kim]

You're doing your recording of podcast voice?

[Kalila]

Okay. Would you watch Heated Rivalry with me?

[Peter Kim]

I would watch it. Yeah, of course.

[Kalila]

Oh, okay.

[Jenna]

Yep.

[Kalila]

Then you're straight, Dave.

[Jenna]

You're straight and we love you.

[Kalila]

That's all.

[Peter Kim]

Wait, that's it? But I'm curious why. What's the. This was the test of some kind.

[Kalila]

Because if guys don't want to watch heated rivalry, then they're secretly gay.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, that's interesting. I mean, maybe, man, you guys are obsessed with finding secretly gay men. Oh, my God. Let them be secretly gay. No, they're ruining the world.

[Jenna]

No, because the secretly gay men are hurting other people.

[Peter Kim]

They're ruining things.

[Kalila]

It.

[Peter Kim]

I'm not dipping my toes into this. This feels too loaded.

[Kalila]

Okay.

[Peter Kim]

I would happily watch it. I mean, a lot of my friends have watched it. They enjoyed it.

[Kalila]

Okay.

[Peter Kim]

And I love hockey.

[Kalila]

Okay.

[Jenna]

Okay, Dan.

[Kalila]

All right, I'll see you later. Okay, bye.

[Esther]

I'm going to take notes from that Filipina and record aloha from, like, a little camera. I can see that.

[Kalila]

The sports thing. This is where, like, I'm toxic. Like, the. Anything about sports, I'm not going to be able to watch it.

[Esther]

Yeah, there's out.

[Jenna]

Say it. Whatever. I said.

[Peter Kim]

My partner is a sports gay, so he watches.

[Kalila]

Oh, sports gay.

[Peter Kim]

I know.

[Jenna]

Wait, so he's also eagle spouse. Wait, that's hot.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, that's hot. No, it's hot. If you like the outdoors.

[Kalila]

Not even.

[Peter Kim]

Because you can, like, think about city gay.

[Jenna]

But you can think about, like, what if. If we ended up in the outdoors, daddy would save us. That's hard.

[Kalila]

Do.

[Peter Kim]

He can't do. No, he's like, he. He knows how to tie knots.

[Jenna]

Okay. Hot.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Esther]

My favorite thing to watch is another man approach my man and ask him to help him with fishing knots on a boat.

[Peter Kim]

That is.

[Esther]

So when other man for help, she.

[Peter Kim]

Was like, let's get ready to.

[Kalila]

She's ovulating.

[Esther]

Honestly, like, so my man is like a man's man. Other men always need his help, whether it's with our car engine, whether it's with roofing, ac, fish hooks. Yeah, anything. And he's always so calm and like, he's like, yeah, let me. Let me help you there. How do you. How do you want it?

[Jenna]

And I'm always, how do you want it?

[Peter Kim]

How do you want it? How do you feel?

[Esther]

But it was to watch him help other men is like my favorite things. My favorite show on earth.

[Peter Kim]

Does that turn you on?

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

God. I would like. Oh, if my partner changed someone else's tire, I would him on the asphalt for sure. Are you serious? Me too. Ever?

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

Oh, my God. Being able to do things like jack up the top.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, but you know how to jack up?

[Jenna]

Yeah, I do.

[Kalila]

Yeah, you do all this, guys, this.

[Jenna]

Is the issue with me is you're.

[Kalila]

The dude, the man, the man.

[Peter Kim]

You just need the girl or whatever form that is.

[Jenna]

No, no.

[Peter Kim]

Okay.

[Jenna]

I mean, not saying that I wouldn't. A woman. I'm just saying, like the male version of that. Like, what it. No, I want someone to double down whether it's male or female. I want them to double down and.

[Peter Kim]

Be like a little twinkie man to take care of who's, like, good at math.

[Jenna]

No. Oh, good at math.

[Peter Kim]

You know, like brings in the money.

[Jenna]

And he's like, R is really good.

[Peter Kim]

At a string bean, but a big dick.

[Jenna]

No.

[Peter Kim]

What do you call it?

[Esther]

The pectoris. Excavate them with her chest, like, sunken in. But their dicks are so big.

[Peter Kim]

Huge dick. Bird bath chest.

[Kalila]

Yes, bird bath chest.

[Peter Kim]

Truly.

[Jenna]

We're gonna call R and see what his response would be. See if he'll watch Heated Rivalry with me.

[Peter Kim]

He gets.

[Jenna]

Hi, I just have a question for you.

[Peter Kim]

The tone of your voice tells me it's a funny one.

[Kalila]

What's up, Tovia?

[Jenna]

I have a question. You know that show that you've been around when I'm watching and there's like a lot of naked butts on the screen? It's Heated Rivalry. The one about the. The hockey show?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

Would you watch that show with me? Like, if we were hanging out, Would you watch it with me?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, watch it.

[Kalila]

Okay.

[Jenna]

Just know your response was recorded, so we'll see.

[Peter Kim]

Okay. I love you.

[Jenna]

Okay. Love you. Talk to you later.

[Kalila]

You guys can shop our favorite bras and [e-mail] trashtuesday we are obsessed with skims and we have been for years. I just didn't realize I could feel comfortable and a little sexy underneath my clothes. I love the fit and the comfort and the sexiness. I love the cotton jersey. Full brief. Sometimes it's not always a thong day. Most times it's a full brief day and I really love my fits. Everybody scoop Bralette, which I have sized up about three, three sizes this pregnancy. And I've been where I'm wearing it right now. It's really just the only bra that I feel really comfortable in. And it's also kind of cute, you know, I mean, it's more cute when I'm not pregnant, but that's just a me thing. You can shop our favorite bras and [e-mail] after you place your order. Be sure to let them know we sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the drop down menu that follows.

[Peter Kim]

Why do we have on the screen hot gay Asians, Bowen Yang and Joe Kim, Booster. And my name's not third I don't understand. Honestly, that's not even up there.

[Jenna]

Well, you were the first one because we introduced you first.

[Peter Kim]

You put Bowen Yang and Joe Kim, booster.

[Esther]

I honestly told them to put that up there just to elicit rage.

[Peter Kim]

I'm pissed.

[Esther]

I told you.

[Peter Kim]

The two of my biggest competition up there.

[Jenna]

Guys. This whole time he's been like, looking at both screens.

[Esther]

So you know how like for the.

[Peter Kim]

Longest thing on the agenda, which is.

[Kalila]

So rude, he did say to put it there to make you mad.

[Peter Kim]

So crazy because you went to Chinese New Year's. I was like, oh, we're just gonna skip over hot gay Asians and no Peter Kim.

[Esther]

For the longest time, like, Asians were just competing for like, any role.

[Jenna]

Right.

[Esther]

So, like, you'd go to the room and it would be like, like, you know, the Bobby Lee's to like Steven Yun. Like the. The range was so great because it was like they're competing for just one thing now that like every. There's so many roles. Like, what is your. Do you find yourself, like, still competing with like, the gay Asians?

[Peter Kim]

There's not so many roles.

[Kalila]

Yeah, there's more like, of a idea that there's room for more people. But I. I feel like it's not like there's a lot of roles.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, yeah. We're still going out for the same stuff.

[Esther]

Stuff.

[Jenna]

Yeah. That's the issue is that people are like, oh, my God. Everyone who's booking it is Latina and brown and black. And it's like, no, they're not. And if you look at the percentages of like, yeah, what is actually on tv, it's still so low. There's just more of us now trying to get it because people are emboldened.

[Kalila]

There's also less of everything right now.

[Peter Kim]

Less of everything.

[Kalila]

The white woman. Let me speak.

[Peter Kim]

Okay, Give her space.

[Jenna]

White short space woman.

[Kalila]

As a white pregnant woman, there's less for everyone. So I. I don't know. I'm just trying.

[Jenna]

This is racist what you're doing with your hands.

[Peter Kim]

My God.

[Jenna]

On the Lunar New Year, doing this with your hands.

[Kalila]

Trying to say that I relate to. If that's okay. If that's okay. I can relate.

[Peter Kim]

You may relate.

[Kalila]

Okay, keep going, keep going.

[Peter Kim]

No, there's less, but I think there's more of the, like, inclusion of a gay vision on TV because Bowen Yang was on snl. Yeah, we're all still going out for the same thing.

[Jenna]

There's like, more possibility not to speak on gaysians. But like, in my.

[Kalila]

You should be Able to speak on gaysians.

[Jenna]

Yeah. Thank you. So I feel like there's more of a possibility, but there's not actual. Actually, factually. More roles. Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

And no one's. Yeah, it's. It's kind of a weird up time right now.

[Jenna]

It's a weird.

[Esther]

But you are part of the hot Cajun, by the way.

[Peter Kim]

I would just love it to be reflected on the agenda now that it pissed you off.

[Jenna]

Now it can be added.

[Peter Kim]

No, I mean, I love that they're around and they're out here working. It makes it easier for me to be able to, like, position myself, to be like, hey, can I do something? And it's not like, why would you.

[Jenna]

Speaking of. Go back now that I'm not trying to do the CBS Diversity Showcase anymore. Because it's done.

[Peter Kim]

Is it done?

[Esther]

Done?

[Jenna]

It's done. Because I auditioned for it last year and they were like, we actually stopped doing it now. They canceled it. No, I was in it, like, seven years ago, and I was in that position already.

[Peter Kim]

In it. And you wanted to do it again.

[Jenna]

Well, I was in it. And then about, like, I don't know, 40 days in or something, I was like, really? I mean, I was dealing with some health stuff, but I was also really sticking to what I thought was funny. And I was being told stuff like, well, you wouldn't really be a yoga teacher, would you? I don't think you would really be Cat. I was being told that type of stuff.

[Peter Kim]

You're not Indian.

[Jenna]

They only wanted, like, white people to. I, like, constantly being told, like, not.

[Peter Kim]

Enough roles for you.

[Jenna]

Right. Like, you wouldn't really play that. And it's like, yeah, I would, though.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

Yeah. And this is not inclusive in what it's supposed to be.

[Esther]

Can you please have a look at the agenda now?

[Peter Kim]

Number one, Peter Kim.

[Esther]

Okay.

[Jenna]

You can barely even see who else joking.

[Peter Kim]

Booster and Tiny Font.

[Jenna]

You can't even see it. They're not even.

[Peter Kim]

This for 2026. This is my fire horse.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

I'm loving this.

[Peter Kim]

What?

[Jenna]

Everyone makes fun of me because I wake up and I drink hot water.

[Peter Kim]

Who makes fun of you?

[Jenna]

Literally everyone.

[Kalila]

That's like, literally no one.

[Jenna]

Literally for sure. I've been doing it for, like, 10 years because not only in the morning, but I don't drink cold water. I like it cold water. Thank you. Thank you.

[Esther]

No one likes.

[Jenna]

I like it.

[Esther]

See, you're drinking ice water first thing in the morning.

[Kalila]

Iced tea this morning.

[Esther]

On a hot day, sure, it's fine. But, like, first thing in the morning Cold water. Hell no.

[Jenna]

Even room temp. It needs to be warm.

[Peter Kim]

Okay. This is the whole, like, new I'm Chinese tick tock trend.

[Kalila]

What is that?

[Peter Kim]

This creator, Sherry, she was like, sorry, now you're Chinese because now you're drinking hot water in the morning. Sorry, now you're talking about, like, yang energy versus yin energy. You're Chinese and it's like this new. Yeah, like, trend. I like that people are taking her. It's like Eastern medicine.

[Kalila]

Tcm.

[Peter Kim]

What's tcm?

[Jenna]

Chinese.

[Esther]

Chinese medicine.

[Peter Kim]

She's just like, filtering it through. Like. Yeah, do these things. Like, you're Chinese now. So now do these things.

[Jenna]

Like, that's what Chinese people just do.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

And everyone's like, oh, now that I'm Chinese, I'm drinking hot water now. And it's like a black girl, you know, in Texas, this. And everyone's not adopting this thing.

[Jenna]

I love that because that's, like, very positive.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, it's great. It's kind of like old. Like, we've had this, but now it's just become like a trend or.

[Jenna]

I've always been ajuma. So.

[Peter Kim]

Ajima.

[Kalila]

Hot water.

[Esther]

Yeah, the hot water thing is like clothing the.

[Kalila]

Do you drink hot water in the morning?

[Esther]

I drink. Well, if it's on my bedside. Because I'm a camel. I drink so much water. It's.

[Jenna]

It's in the night, too.

[Peter Kim]

Room temp is fine, too.

[Esther]

Room temp. I don't drink. I don't have ice in my home.

[Jenna]

It gets.

[Kalila]

No, I don't do ice.

[Jenna]

I don't even have ice in the freezer.

[Kalila]

Yeah, but wait, can I ask you a question about drinking water at night? Do you like. So let's say you have your water, and maybe it's like, from the day, whatever, and then you have it on your nightstand by the morning. Do you consider it expired?

[Esther]

I drink so much that it's finished. But you're. I always, like, in the middle of the night.

[Jenna]

You're drinking it.

[Esther]

No, I mean, right now I'm not a good example because I am breastfeeding. So, like, you have to keep drinking water. But usually by the morning, I change out my water. Yeah, I don't like old water unless.

[Jenna]

It has a calf. Like something.

[Peter Kim]

Something over it.

[Kalila]

Does this count? Because I feel like it tastes expired in the morning.

[Esther]

Then. Yeah, change it out.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kalila]

Why does it taste.

[Jenna]

This is what I do in the morning.

[Peter Kim]

It's in the air.

[Jenna]

I go to bed, I fill up just this amount because I go, who's. I'm not gonna drink this much at night. More than this. So I fill up a cup that only has that amount in case, like, I have anxiety. I want to take an L theanine in the middle of the night.

[Peter Kim]

What's ltheni?

[Jenna]

It's L Theanine. It's an amino acid that really helps with anxiety.

[Peter Kim]

What? That's good.

[Kalila]

It's in green tea. That's why they say green tea or like matcha gives you a smoother caffeine high.

[Jenna]

Because it has caffeine with L theanine.

[Peter Kim]

Oh.

[Jenna]

It's naturally occurring in it.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, that's what that thing is. So you could take that like. Like pill form?

[Kalila]

Yeah, just that.

[Peter Kim]

Whoa.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Are you guys all on it?

[Kalila]

No, I was taking it when I was off my anxiety meds and it was not doing the trick.

[Jenna]

It was healthy.

[Kalila]

I'm on Lexapro.

[Peter Kim]

Lexapro.

[Kalila]

Okay.

[Peter Kim]

I'm on Effector.

[Esther]

I was on Effector for a while.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Esther]

After I got off Zoloft because it was not a match.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And then I got an Effector and it was also not a match.

[Peter Kim]

Effects are very particular.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Esther]

I was in high. I was in still in high school. Guy. FX has been around a while.

[Jenna]

I will say, if you ever plan to go off of it, be so careful and taper. How they tell you to.

[Peter Kim]

Girl, when I miss one day.

[Esther]

Same.

[Peter Kim]

I'm spinning.

[Esther]

Can I tell you, I missed one day and guess where I ended up?

[Peter Kim]

Jail.

[Esther]

Close. Close.

[Kalila]

Here.

[Esther]

Like in. Yeah, in a. In a psych hospital.

[Peter Kim]

What?

[Esther]

Yeah, I've been in a psych hospital three times. Wow.

[Jenna]

Yes, cutie.

[Esther]

Thank you.

[Kalila]

No time since you've met me.

[Esther]

No time since I met you.

[Jenna]

This is a psych hospital.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

No, I was like, the lights are bright enough.

[Esther]

I was so. Just not very good with my meds in high school.

[Peter Kim]

And you would skip them.

[Esther]

I would skip them and I would end right back where I belong.

[Kalila]

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[Peter Kim]

What? What's the Chinese thing or Eastern medicine thing that you guys do.

[Jenna]

Do everything?

[Peter Kim]

Do you do acupuncture?

[Kalila]

So I've done it.

[Peter Kim]

You've done it.

[Kalila]

I would like to do it more.

[Peter Kim]

I like to cupping.

[Esther]

Cupping.

[Peter Kim]

Then my mom would cut me at home.

[Jenna]

That's great.

[Peter Kim]

With her little.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

And she was not trained. She didn't even watch a YouTube. She was like, I could do this. I'm like. And she would like practice on me.

[Kalila]

And it hurts, you know, Hurts crazy.

[Jenna]

When they bleed you out.

[Esther]

Yeah. They bleed the person that we go to. They bleed you before they come.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

What are you talking about?

[Esther]

Letting it blood lead.

[Jenna]

Why they cut you?

[Peter Kim]

It's like to relieve pressure points along the chi. Yes.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Yes. You have. You've ever heard of leech therapy?

[Kalila]

Yeah, I've heard of it.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

It's like, similar.

[Jenna]

It's bleach there. Oh.

[Esther]

I bet you guys don't even know that, like, that maggots have a place in a hospital. And I bet you've never been to, like, specific, like, wound care scenario, win this bet.

[Kalila]

What?

[Peter Kim]

American hospitals are Filipino American.

[Kalila]

What happens?

[Peter Kim]

They're keeping maggots at the hospital.

[Esther]

Yes. And because they. They eat away at the dead tissue in a wound so you can medically place certain. Like, I don't have a cream for that.

[Peter Kim]

We're still using maggots.

[Esther]

These are like.

[Peter Kim]

That's crazy.

[Esther]

Please look it up. I swear to you, I'm eating not.

[Peter Kim]

Have an infection in your leg.

[Kalila]

I like it. Be honest.

[Esther]

But it's the same way that we've used leeches in the past. It's not.

[Peter Kim]

That's what I mean. Like, we used to use leeches, but.

[Esther]

Now maggots are so efficient at eating dead tissue and things that are gangrenous or really infected wounds. Maggot debridement therapy.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, my God.

[Esther]

Yeah. This is. And it's a very effective chronic non.

[Peter Kim]

Healing wounds that have failed to respond to. So it's a final resort. It's a last resort. I don't know that they're using conventional methods first. Like creams. I feel.

[Esther]

What's a cream gonna do to eat away a dead tissue?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Esther]

You know what I mean? It's gonna make it know that the.

[Jenna]

Larvae don't have, like, bacteria, that they're then just reinfecting the wound.

[Esther]

No, these maggots are more specialized. Yeah.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Esther]

They don't just pick them off the trash, Jenna.

[Jenna]

They went to Ivy League.

[Peter Kim]

Yes.

[Esther]

Yeah. And I think it's a. A very specific fly.

[Jenna]

Oh, I forgot that.

[Peter Kim]

Is maggot a fly?

[Esther]

Yes.

[Peter Kim]

It's like, it was a.

[Jenna]

It's the larva of the. It's the worm.

[Kalila]

It's the worm of the flies.

[Peter Kim]

Is that what a maggot is?

[Kalila]

Oh, that's bad.

[Peter Kim]

What the.

[Esther]

Are we like butterflies or caterpillars?

[Jenna]

Caterpillars are way different. Caterpillars are like, what a beautiful.

[Peter Kim]

That's cool up.

[Jenna]

Caterpillars are like the gay larvae. Like, they're beautiful, amazing. We love them.

[Peter Kim]

They're the drag queens.

[Kalila]

Okay. Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Really?

[Esther]

Are they healing people?

[Jenna]

Yeah, they make me happy.

[Esther]

You know what butterflies live for? What? Two days are doing the hard work and actually treating, like, wounded patients. Don't make it sound like that because of their flowers.

[Jenna]

My correlation. Maggots would be just like regular straight men who eat off of people who like.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, I see what maggots need.

[Esther]

Better print. I support a maggot.

[Kalila]

Go for it.

[Esther]

I support them. I appreciate their hard work. Thank you for your service. Maggots only running on the maggot platform.

[Jenna]

Only the grown ones in labs. So only men. Men grown in labs are acceptable. Wait, heated rivalry? Oh, did you say heated rivalry?

[Peter Kim]

No, but let's not.

[Jenna]

Okay, so another.

[Peter Kim]

Well, it's weird because, like, you guys aren't caught up, right?

[Esther]

Yeah, we're not caught up.

[Jenna]

They're never gonna get caught up.

[Peter Kim]

Your husbands are watching it with you. You better be ready to have sex with them.

[Jenna]

Their husbands are gonna watch.

[Kalila]

Not ready for that.

[Jenna]

No.

[Peter Kim]

You're gonna get.

[Esther]

My hair hasn't been waxed in a long time. My cheeks are not ready.

[Peter Kim]

About your hair.

[Jenna]

Yeah. I will wax your hair.

[Esther]

I'm not asking to be waxed. I'm in a period of letting everything grow out. Thank you.

[Jenna]

Well, then it doesn't matter.

[Esther]

I also just don't want to be touched.

[Jenna]

What? No, I have really. Like, you don't. I laserd it.

[Peter Kim]

You lasered it?

[Jenna]

I lasered it because. I'll tell you what I am paranoid of. What are they called, the things that I'm scared to get? Pin worms.

[Esther]

Oh.

[Jenna]

And so I. It's like an irrational fear. Pin worms.

[Peter Kim]

What is that? What the. I see why you don't like her having bean hair. She gets nasty. You get nasty?

[Kalila]

No.

[Peter Kim]

What's a word?

[Esther]

So much better. Wait, is this. No.

[Jenna]

This is not the part that bothers Esther, by the way. The part that bothers her is just me saying, like, I had sex on pin worms. No, Like, I was riding him. She's like, look at her.

[Kalila]

The way she says it, she'll be like, I was.

[Jenna]

This is the least disgusting thing I've ever said to Esther's pinworms. She doesn't care about that.

[Esther]

Can I just say, you're also being treated in a double standard way right now. Cuz I just brought up maggots. And like, I feel like it was.

[Kalila]

Like the same reaction.

[Esther]

Well received, I would say. You let me finish.

[Kalila]

No, I actually think that's worse than this.

[Jenna]

Then it wasn't about Kalila. It was about the maggots, the magnets, maglets.

[Esther]

Me.

[Jenna]

It's about me, not the pin worms.

[Peter Kim]

What's going on with pinworm? You don't want to get it. So you didn't. You didn't laser your hair.

[Jenna]

The hair has nothing to do with pinworms, okay?

[Peter Kim]

How do you get pinworms?

[Jenna]

They're underneath your nails if a lot of kids have them.

[Esther]

Worms, Peter.

[Peter Kim]

Worms.

[Kalila]

No. Yeah. I have not had worms.

[Peter Kim]

And then I've picked up worms from the dirt.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

No, no, no. That's earthworms.

[Esther]

I do that, too. Have you, like, had worms in your butt?

[Peter Kim]

Worms. By butt, yeah. I mean, I've had men with tiny dicks, if that's what you're saying.

[Jenna]

That's a whim. In your butt?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Esther]

You guys are losers.

[Peter Kim]

Wait, why did you have worms?

[Jenna]

Listen, as a kid. As a kid, kids get pin worms. I mean, that's why they're always digging in their butts.

[Kalila]

Why? Oh.

[Jenna]

Oh, my God.

[Kalila]

I saw a kid digging in his butt the other day. And then.

[Jenna]

They don't pin worm. They're not clean about it, okay? It lives. They can live for 18 days alive, without a host. So they're living on your couches, your upholstery, your rugs. And then when people go to clean their bedding and they go like this. Well, you don't have kids, so you're fine.

[Peter Kim]

No, but I am naked in suspect places.

[Jenna]

No, no, no, no. But little kids, dirty kids. Well, actually, they're not dirty kids. Yeah, but they go like this, and then all the eggs fly off, and then you can inhale them as well. And that is how you get pinworms.

[Kalila]

How do you protect yourself?

[Jenna]

You just don't put your fingers in your mouth.

[Kalila]

Why do kids get them?

[Esther]

They're just around each other. They're very, like, fecal. Oral. Right. They're very in their. In their butts and in their mouth.

[Jenna]

Doing that all day.

[Esther]

And how you test them. You know, it's a really cute way to test for worms. They put a little. They get a little piece of Scotch.

[Jenna]

Tape, and then they.

[Esther]

They scotch tape your butt, and then they release it, and then they put it under a microscope to check for larva.

[Jenna]

Thank you for knowing the right way. Because people think that a tape is that you put it on your butt and then worms come off. I've had so many friends be like, I don't have pin worms because I did the tape test. I'm like, they're not coming off on the tape.

[Esther]

Just checking for larvae that are microscopic. Microbiology come through.

[Kalila]

I'm so glad I know you guys.

[Esther]

If you ever need help with your worms, you know who to call.

[Kalila]

Wait, did you guys see that?

[Jenna]

No.

[Kalila]

Dr. Oz called. Alcohol it's okay.

[Esther]

Is Easy still alive and. And speaking? Yeah.

[Kalila]

He doesn't look good, though. He looks bad.

[Jenna]

Does he still have a show?

[Kalila]

No, he's like a. He's like. Works for the government now. What is his job?

[Peter Kim]

Hhs.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, he's the Health Human Services.

[Jenna]

Oh, that's bad.

[Esther]

What is that is so upset.

[Peter Kim]

Didn't he put say, like, don't drink first thing in the morning?

[Kalila]

Yeah. So this is what's so shady about. I mean, obviously everything is a mess, but, like, alcohol is bad, but actually, you. It's okay to have. Have. It's okay to drink alcohol. And two drinks a day is fine because it's a social lubricant. And so have. He said the most important thing is having a nice time with your friends. That's the healthiest thing you could do for yourself.

[Jenna]

Okay.

[Kalila]

Just don't have it for breakfast.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

Which to me is like, I don't trust you at all, obviously.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

But it's so demeaning to the people of America to be like you. You need a social lubricant.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

And I understand that some people do feel that way, and that's. I get that.

[Esther]

Like.

[Kalila]

But for someone in power to be like, you guys are so stupid and so shy and weird that you must drink so you can go out and socialize.

[Jenna]

This tells me two things. One, they want people to continue being drunk and drunks and sick and reliant on the health care system. And they don't want them to heal and they don't want us to be thinking straight. Right. Because then you can't plan and figure things out for yourself. And number two, they've got, like, a deal with some liquor company.

[Peter Kim]

Alcohol sales are down.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Really bad. Because huge.

[Kalila]

They are.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Esther]

Young generation.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah. They're not drinking.

[Jenna]

They're down.

[Kalila]

Like, this is literally an economic statement.

[Jenna]

I mean, it's.

[Peter Kim]

This is from the alcohol lobby.

[Kalila]

It's George Bush after 9, 11 being like, the best thing you can do is go shopping. Yes.

[Jenna]

Yeah, exactly like that.

[Kalila]

He's like, go drink for the economy.

[Jenna]

That's exactly what it is. And that's why they got him to say it looks so bad. Three men, one of them is red. Yeah.

[Esther]

Honestly, his color looks like that of an alcoholic. You know, alcoholics have that, like, fake.

[Peter Kim]

Tan, the purple face.

[Kalila]

You know how when people become president, like, they look so bad four years later. It's like, that's happened to all these men in six months. Like, who's the guy?

[Peter Kim]

Other guy.

[Kalila]

He's Just a body.

[Esther]

Let's just call him that.

[Peter Kim]

Wait, Dr. Oslo looks unrecognizable.

[Kalila]

I know.

[Jenna]

Look at RFK.

[Kalila]

But it's just so shady to be, like, in the scent, in the vein of health. You should drink.

[Jenna]

That's so sad.

[Peter Kim]

Disgusting.

[Jenna]

It's really sad.

[Kalila]

I think it bothers me in particular, like, I think, because I'm. It's a very sensitive subject for me because of my grandma, like, seeing how she deteriorated compared to her siblings who were not drinkers. I'm telling you, if you saw that, you'd be like. Like, I'm not. I don't want to. I don't want to drink. Like.

[Esther]

And they always, like, kind of, like, tie it into the conversation that. I guess Scott Galloway kind of sends that similar message too, where it's like, not. Not enough young men are going out there and getting drunk and, like, socializing. And the idea of that is that not enough men are getting out. They're turning into incels. Right?

[Kalila]

Like, not the head of health.

[Esther]

But what's exciting about that is that why does it have to involve this toxic thing you put in your body? As an excessive drinker, as someone with extreme social anxiety, who used alcohol as a crutch for so long, who used it as a social lubricant for so long, do you know how easy it is to fall, like, to go past that line of, like, into, like, dangerous territory so fast within a couple weeks?

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Esther]

I became what I didn't think was an alcoholic. But looking back, I'm like, I have been. I binged it. It was Thursday through Sunday, but because I got my schoolwork done, because I, I, you know, work was not compromised, I thought it was okay to drink and take shots. Like six shots before I even left because I was too broke to buy drinks at the club we were going to. Right? So I would, like, get it all in now. But if you were to ask me if I had a problem, I'd be like, no, I don't have a problem. I just need this as a social lubricant. And it's like, no. I was literally tearing my body apart. Right?

[Jenna]

That's so sad, because you already know that some people's lives are changing because they see this. They believe it. It.

[Kalila]

I wonder, though, does anyone even listen to this?

[Jenna]

Yeah, they do.

[Peter Kim]

Really?

[Esther]

People do.

[Jenna]

Not here, but people do in other.

[Peter Kim]

Waiting for Dr. Oz to tell them it's okay to drink. Dude, I feel like that guy's already drinking. You know what I mean?

[Esther]

Better about the message. He's just like, oh, see, I knew it.

[Peter Kim]

Feel better. I mean it. I don't know if any of this matters.

[Esther]

It doesn't.

[Kalila]

I saw someone comment. They're like, if I have to hear more of RFK and Dr. Oz, I'm gonna have to have alcohol for breakfast. I was like, I love you.

[Peter Kim]

That's so good.

[Jenna]

I do think that there are other states, though, where people are, like, being encouraged by this. Specifically younger kids.

[Esther]

And look, listen, I wonder. I love a good night out. Alcohol is fun, just not like two a day. Sounds like the weirdest message ever.

[Peter Kim]

That's crazy.

[Jenna]

So weird.

[Peter Kim]

That has to. You have to look at that and be like, what's driving that?

[Kalila]

And I also do want to, like, give the disclaimer that I'm also coming from a place of a family of alcoholics. So I do understand that there are people that do have healthy relationships with alcohol, and it's fine. But that is just where I come from with, you know, my. What I'm bringing to the table. But I still think that this statement is absurd.

[Jenna]

It's like, very obviously, hey, we need money.

[Esther]

Yeah, we.

[Jenna]

We want it. It in the easiest way. Exactly. Because they say it's down like 78 or something.

[Kalila]

That's crazy.

[Esther]

I did not know that.

[Jenna]

Something like that. Yeah.

[Kalila]

It's because Diddy's in prison and he can't promote Sarah. That's a problem.

[Jenna]

Baby oil must be down too.

[Peter Kim]

Johnson Johnson's catering.

[Esther]

I saw this TikTok where this girl was talking about how she. Throughout, like, pop culture media, you always see the girl sort of be okay with her object of affection being ugly and never the other way around. Never a hot man chasing an ugly girl, like, ever. And I want to say that I think that the reason I've dated, like, I'll go after. I'll go after. I'll go. Is because I'm a victim of society and that. Yeah, I was tricked. I don't think I have a predisposition to loving uggos. I think that society did this to me.

[Kalila]

You're doppelganger and uggo.

[Peter Kim]

Just to be clear, Steven Yun.

[Esther]

Yeah, no, I. I don't think I've dated, but you know what I mean?

[Peter Kim]

It's like, what is go. Can I just get that defined?

[Esther]

Does that mean just maybe not, like. Because, like, maybe not, like, standardly attractive, which by standard attract, like, someone who's standardly attractive is so boring to me. Like, it's kind of like seeing something in full symmetry and display, and you're being like, where are the crowds?

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Esther]

I don't want to touch that. Like, I can look at it like, oh, you're cute. But there's no museum. Not interesting. There's no, like, dimension.

[Jenna]

Like, the hot, hot thoughts.

[Esther]

Yeah. But I think. I feel like girls have been taught to be like, hey, dig deeper.

[Peter Kim]

Like, the Seth Rogan dude.

[Jenna]

Marcelo Hernandez talks about that in his standup special. He's like, dudes are so petty. Yeah. Whereas, like, he's. He was saying, like, if women bring a dude around who's not like, a 10, and they're like, hey, I love this dude and he's great to me, and we're happy. The girls are like, okay. And if a dude brings around a girl who he's like, they'll find anything wrong if her forehead is too big. Like, they. The way they pick apart women as a whole and as a culture is why I think this exists.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

And also, maybe men are really just trying to show off.

[Esther]

I think so. I think that's definitely.

[Peter Kim]

I feel like they just want each other to be like, yeah. You know what I mean? Like, it almost has nothing to do with women at all.

[Esther]

Exactly.

[Jenna]

Men are obsessed with trophies.

[Esther]

Yes.

[Jenna]

Heated rivalry. Heat a rivalry back to the trophy that they won. Yeah.

[Esther]

Yep.

[Peter Kim]

Do you know any girls that, like, only date hot guys?

[Kalila]

I feel like I have seen that.

[Peter Kim]

And what's that about?

[Jenna]

Wait. My friends who write lists about what they want in their relationships, it's like, I've seen, like, 16 bullet points, and none of them have to do with what they look like. It's like, is in therapy. Has a sense of humor, can be compassionate, be empathetic.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

Feel safe around, like, can laugh at himself. Yeah. None of it has anything to do with.

[Peter Kim]

With how tall he is.

[Jenna]

Yeah. Or if he has butt hair or not.

[Peter Kim]

That's the only thing I do think I am shallow about, is height.

[Esther]

Oh, your height? Elitas, too.

[Peter Kim]

A little bit. Like, I love my short kings, but because I'm a bigger gal, I need to feel smaller in comparison.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

I'm a bigger cow.

[Peter Kim]

I'm five foot eight. I'm. You know.

[Jenna]

Really?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

You're five.

[Peter Kim]

I have a big face. Even for Koreans. This is like, extra large.

[Esther]

Everything to Koreans is extra large.

[Peter Kim]

I know.

[Esther]

And I hate it.

[Peter Kim]

I hate it. But I do seek Korean male attention.

[Esther]

I know exactly what you're talking about. But this is why I never ask or try to get validation from Koreans ever about beauty stuff.

[Peter Kim]

Because how do you do it?

[Esther]

Because, like, anytime I'm around someone else, they're always like, wow, your jaw, your bone structure is so good. You do this and that. If I go to Korean, they're like, nope. Phase two was I'm immediately out. I'm immediately out of the running. Right?

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, I know. Because our beauty standards like this.

[Esther]

This.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah. You have to fit a. Like a pinhole.

[Jenna]

Yeah, but that's not even real beauty face.

[Peter Kim]

Fist face.

[Kalila]

No.

[Peter Kim]

In Korea, this is like a adage where like, if you want to be on tv, your face has to be the size of your fist.

[Kalila]

If it doesn't, my clothes.

[Esther]

You kind of.

[Peter Kim]

Huh? Yeah.

[Jenna]

What are they hiring a frog?

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Cuz all your entire facial features have to be like or you can't be on tv.

[Esther]

But guys, what about this? What about me, Jenna? My fist?

[Kalila]

Yeah, your fist.

[Peter Kim]

No. Your closed fist.

[Esther]

No. What are you talking about?

[Jenna]

Wait, this doesn't make sense. Like, wait, this just reminds me of the Beetlejuice guy with a shrunken head. That's what they want.

[Peter Kim]

That's beautiful. In Korea, like, the smaller. The smaller the head, the less best thoughts.

[Jenna]

You're beautiful.

[Kalila]

Well, you guys brought up like having a list of what people are looking for in someone, whether it's looks or insides. I am against that completely.

[Peter Kim]

Less.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Esther]

List in general.

[Peter Kim]

How do you. How do you search?

[Kalila]

Well, no, I just think if you're having a list of the criterion, it's.

[Jenna]

Not requirements, it's like what you would like, what you're looking for, what you want to bring in, what you want to manifest.

[Esther]

I think I know what you're saying.

[Kalila]

Yourself up to be looking for something specific. And then you're going to meet someone organically and you're going to be like, well, they don't have. They don't check this box. And then you're going to be too picky and you're going to be single forever.

[Jenna]

I don't know. I will say that my two friends who I know who did this, they did it as like a manifestation and they literally found. They have two kids.

[Kalila]

I get that. That's.

[Jenna]

And they didn't. The men didn't have everything on the list. They were just trying to get away from what they were looking for in men before, which was like, bad. That was just like a type, which as you know how I feel about types. Types are fake.

[Peter Kim]

You can't have time.

[Jenna]

They're not real.

[Peter Kim]

You're saying, just be open to surprise.

[Kalila]

If you have this idea in your head of what you're looking for. And then the person is a great person, but they don't match it. Like you're not. You're just gonna be passing over everybody.

[Esther]

Okay.

[Peter Kim]

This is what happened to me and my hubby because he is not my type. Type. I've struggled with this as a petty, shallow Korean. I was like, how could I be with someone that's not my type?

[Jenna]

When you met him, did you go like this?

[Peter Kim]

No, no. His face is tight.

[Esther]

He's so gorgeous.

[Peter Kim]

He's hot.

[Esther]

He's gorgeous. Like he. I met him in the wild at like a CAA party.

[Peter Kim]

He used to do those photos.

[Jenna]

He is hot.

[Esther]

And I fancy parties. I didn't even know that you. He was your partner. And I was like, this man is so gorgeous. Gorgeous.

[Peter Kim]

And he's like gorgeous. Minnesota gorgeous. Which is like.

[Jenna]

They don't know that's the best Midwest, gorgeous.

[Kalila]

Minnesota. And they're nice. No, I'm from Chicago, but all my mom's side of things from Minnesota. They're so nice.

[Peter Kim]

So nice.

[Kalila]

They don't know what they've got.

[Peter Kim]

Like, no.

[Kalila]

Yeah. They're clueless.

[Peter Kim]

They're clueless and it's because they don't leave that. Like no one really finds out.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

But he's Minnesota hot. So like that was not my type. My type was like bad boy, treat me shitty. I know, like really like young person type of thing. And then when I met him, I kept like thinking like, why isn't he this physical thing? Or like I want. I've always wanted this type of guy. Like I only hook up with this type of guy and he was just not any of those things. But it is true that you like, like you miss out on it. Cuz you're like, I wasn't ready until I met him that I could be open to.

[Esther]

Like, sure, someone great.

[Peter Kim]

That not about ugly or anything like that because he's hot. But like he's just never been my hot.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

You know, it's like some people think Johnny Depp is hot. That's not for me.

[Esther]

And not for me either.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah. But like I get it. It was kind of like that. I was like, oh, you're hot. But like not for me.

[Esther]

Yeah. Something happened in my childhood where it was led me in on a road where I. I just date anyone. All colors, all heights, all anything and whatever trauma I where like. Yeah, like where a physical just didn't come first. Even though I was like, oh yeah, thank God for my mom beating me, I guess. But something happened to where I didn't find that. But also it's so stupid. Because when I was younger, it's just the. The gay.

[Peter Kim]

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

[Esther]

The Asian man wasn't like, the standard of beauty. Right. And so anytime I would like, even when I dated Bobby, to me, Bobby is very handsome. And I know people are always said.

[Jenna]

Like, he's so handsome.

[Esther]

When I met him, I was like, he is so attractive to me. Everything about his style, his voice, his look, everything about him. And people could not wrap their feeble little minds around the fact that I found a person grew up in Asia around a lot of Koreans, a lot of. Around Chinese, Japanese, Filipino, that I found this Asian man highly attractive.

[Jenna]

Like, it was so infuriated and it. I can't even.

[Esther]

The way I was gaslit into believing that, oh, he was ugly. He was ugly. And I'm like, he's not like that. Used to really piss me off early in the relationship. So much so that I played into the fact that. Oh, yeah, yeah, he's a gargoyle. He's ugly. No, the truth is, I find him extremely attractive.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

I don't think people outside of. Of Asian influence understand that.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Because he's only been in the media as someone you don't find attractive. As this Tik Tok thing is, like, we've been groomed to find Bobby not attractive.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, poor Bobby.

[Esther]

He's so rich and single.

[Jenna]

Okay, you know what? You saying that, like, you'd been with so many different men physically. Wait, I was, like, having a thought. Thought. It's very rare for me to have thought. Okay? To me, a type is already a list, and they're. They're looking for a type that is usually not good for them. You were looking for a type.

[Peter Kim]

That's where I was.

[Jenna]

You were looking for a type. So to have a list that gives you a direction of like, I actually am going to pay attention to men if they're funny, gonna pay attention to men if they're making me feel safe. That is gonna lead you and spark something in the better direction because now you have a list versus a type that's like a list in your head anyhow, of.

[Kalila]

Of men who treat you like we're both right.

[Jenna]

I agree with you.

[Peter Kim]

Are you looking for someone?

[Jenna]

No.

[Peter Kim]

No, no. You're done?

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

Okay. You're done.

[Esther]

If you were looking for someone.

[Jenna]

I'm 12 tomorrow.

[Esther]

Where would you start?

[Jenna]

Esther?

[Esther]

Oh, my God.

[Peter Kim]

That's such a hard question.

[Kalila]

No, I. Nowhere would you use.

[Jenna]

Esther would start.

[Kalila]

No, I'm getting a dog named Dave.

[Jenna]

No matter what, Esther would start at A mall. If she had to start over again at a mall in the middle, where would you start?

[Peter Kim]

I tell Eric this all the time. I'm like, if something happens, I'm shutting it down.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

I don't want to do this again.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

It was so much work. You know what I mean? Like, being in a relationship. So much work.

[Jenna]

So much work.

[Peter Kim]

And it's good, gratifying work. But if thinking about doing it all over again feels crazy.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

I think I would want to be like Andy Cohen. I would start at this point in my grade. That's where I would start again.

[Kalila]

So someone I know is dating a guy who is a widower. Like, he lost his, his wife. She's, like, struggling a little bit with that because she's like, you know, it's kind of strange. Like, his relationship ended, but, like, not.

[Jenna]

Because he didn't choose to.

[Kalila]

Yeah. It's been an interesting topic of conversation amongst me and her and others, which is, like, some people, they'll lose their partner and they don't want to move on. And I think some people lose their partner and they do want to move on. And I feel like the person that she's dating is someone that wants to move on, and, like, he deserves to move on. I just, I hate that there's, like, a struggle there because people should be allowed to move on. But I also fully get that there are some people that will not want to move on. Like, I think both options are so valid. I don't know.

[Peter Kim]

I would love, like, a gray garden situation.

[Kalila]

Yes. I'll be there with you.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, my God. Yes. Let's move in.

[Kalila]

That's done. Yes.

[Peter Kim]

Just singing and in costumes and being completely out of my mind.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

Deteriorating house. Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

I did. I, I had the love of my life. I understand, like, being open to love again. It's just the way work. I don't know if I could do the work again. You did.

[Esther]

I think that. Yeah, I, I, I didn't have a defeatist mentality like all of you guys. Okay.

[Jenna]

But Bobby's still, like, in your community. He's your friend still. You guys still like each other. It's different.

[Esther]

Yeah. And I still, in many ways, like, take care of him. Right.

[Peter Kim]

You're family now.

[Esther]

Yeah, we're family.

[Jenna]

It's like, Fe, Tito, Bobby, even to you.

[Esther]

The only thing that would get in the way for me is like, Like, God forbid, I would have to, like, start over again, but I would start over.

[Jenna]

I love you.

[Esther]

Yeah. You like, I love, love.

[Peter Kim]

Yes.

[Esther]

I love the work.

[Peter Kim]

I Don't know if I love love.

[Esther]

I love the feeling. I love the work. I love the transitions from the high honeymoon phase to, like, the more grounded love. I love all of the chapters of it. I love that I, I love the safety of companionship. I love holding hands. And I, I want that always. Yeah. Not because I'm just chasing that feeling, but because, like, I truly like love partnership.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah. You're, like, being.

[Jenna]

It's not necessarily a feeling that you're chasing because that feeling of. Yeah. Feeling wonderful goes away real fast.

[Esther]

Yeah. I'm a flock animal. I, I, I gotta be alone.

[Kalila]

You're not. I'm good with being alone. And I also feel that I never thought I was. I would find a partner. This situation that I found. And so I'm like, I've. I can't believe I've found this once. Like, I'm not gonna expect twice. I don't know.

[Peter Kim]

That's kind of how I feel about it.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Like, I always.

[Kalila]

We're ugly.

[Jenna]

Could definitely find it again. It's not about you're pretty, but it's.

[Esther]

Like, that's not the reality. Right. It's like you could yell out the window and find a partner. So I think it's like. Yeah. It's just so hard to fathom that, like, the person that you currently, like, like love that you could possibly have a life without. I think that's, you know, but reality.

[Jenna]

Is that there's always a life.

[Esther]

There's always a, A big life at the other and. But also, it can stay big whether or not you're in a relationship or not.

[Peter Kim]

You know, you also have children together.

[Jenna]

So such a different thing than me.

[Esther]

It's different. Okay.

[Peter Kim]

A friend of mine from Minnesota has offered her uterus to us. I know. And I'm like, should we move back?

[Jenna]

I have the chills.

[Peter Kim]

I know. Oh, my God.

[Kalila]

What would that look like?

[Peter Kim]

She would carry and then we would be like a family.

[Esther]

I know, but who's.

[Jenna]

So she's not just a surrogate. This is.

[Esther]

She.

[Peter Kim]

No, she would want. Just want to be a surrogate.

[Jenna]

Oh.

[Peter Kim]

But I wouldn't mind, like, if we're back in Minnesota to be like, this.

[Esther]

Is your biological mom.

[Peter Kim]

Because, like, I don't. Yeah.

[Kalila]

Also then to have three parents involved sounds really nice.

[Peter Kim]

That's sick.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

Yeah. I have two of my best friends, they're a lesb couple, and they've asked me and my partner if they could use his sperm for their baby. Okay.

[Peter Kim]

What is he think?

[Kalila]

What do you think?

[Jenna]

I love It. I got to have no baby. Wait, there could still be a baby in the community, in the family that's his.

[Peter Kim]

Amazing. This is like, she's crazy for that.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Because of his.

[Jenna]

Your face is showing that you love it.

[Kalila]

I can't. I'm. I. I want to know what you think.

[Esther]

Like, okay, so before I had a baby, I would probably be like, I love it.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Esther]

And I think what happens is my brain has been, like, warped to really be very mindful about who you get into these lifelong contracts with.

[Kalila]

Oh, that's interesting.

[Jenna]

Oh, but these two women, I'm like, trust for my life.

[Esther]

Yes. But it gets to be complicated. Emotionally, psychologically. Not even just for him, but for you to see that there is this life that's been born of him, that he's a father, that he's a biological father. I know it sounds like you're radically, like, wonderful.

[Kalila]

You're not like that.

[Jenna]

No.

[Esther]

Sorry.

[Jenna]

I want to be left out of as much as possible.

[Esther]

Yeah. I would say, like, yes, that's, like, a beautiful feeling that you have. But before you agree to it, I would really, like, dig deep.

[Jenna]

I haven't agreed to it. And obviously he is. Is doing a lot of thinking because.

[Kalila]

Oh, this is, like, on the table.

[Jenna]

This is, like, we brought it up for, like. Like, six months ago. Wait, and he really wants children with me. Okay, so with you? Yes.

[Peter Kim]

And you don't want at all?

[Jenna]

It's not that I don't want. It's just, like, I'm so focused on, like, I just want to have a career. I can't think about anything.

[Kalila]

She's not in that space.

[Jenna]

But I think about having kids with him every day for, like, the last.

[Peter Kim]

Then you cannot do this.

[Jenna]

This.

[Peter Kim]

No, this is not what I was.

[Esther]

That's what I'm saying. Because if you have.

[Peter Kim]

This is mad.

[Esther]

Thank you.

[Peter Kim]

I thought you were done. I thought your tubes were tied. No, no, no, no.

[Jenna]

But I don't even know if I can have kids.

[Esther]

It doesn't matter.

[Peter Kim]

No, you don't know.

[Esther]

You don't.

[Jenna]

No, I'm not adopting. I'm tired. I don't want to raise a kid.

[Esther]

But you.

[Peter Kim]

But you just said you thought about having kids.

[Esther]

Think about it all the time, Jenna, Because I know you think about it.

[Kalila]

Jenna feels the way. Which. My favorite quote. Which I. One of my friends said this. I don't take credit for it, but when you are in that mode of you're deciding to have kids or not to have kids, both options are terrifying.

[Jenna]

Yes.

[Kalila]

Both options are Terrifying. And that is. I stand by that. It's so true.

[Jenna]

I'll give it to these. Or no.

[Peter Kim]

These dykes will ruin your life right now.

[Jenna]

I just came back from being with them.

[Peter Kim]

No, they're going to ruin your life. You can't do this. You're going to have hatred in your heart.

[Jenna]

They're going to make my life.

[Peter Kim]

That's going to be demon seed.

[Esther]

That's going to be.

[Kalila]

Cuz you're weird.

[Jenna]

You know me, Know me.

[Kalila]

I could see you maybe being. Maybe it working for you. I know for me, I'm very like, I would have. I would feel left out of that. Like, then my child has a sibling. That's not. You know, and I know this is like a selfish take. And it's.

[Jenna]

I, I don't think it's a selfish take. I think it's like your mother's. And you have a better understanding of this.

[Kalila]

I think. I wouldn't like the feeling of my partner having a child that is not also my child. And I think if.

[Jenna]

But it is my child too.

[Peter Kim]

May I pitch something to make it actually your child?

[Jenna]

Because adoption.

[Peter Kim]

What if it was your.

[Esther]

Yes, yes.

[Peter Kim]

Your egg and his sperm. Yes, but they raise your child for you.

[Esther]

But I think that might even be more of a mind. Because.

[Jenna]

You see those monkey toes? It's mine.

[Esther]

Fine.

[Peter Kim]

You see your face within her. Oh, wait. But you don't want to raise. They'll do all the hard work.

[Jenna]

They really want to raise.

[Esther]

Listen, I think it's so noble, your child.

[Kalila]

They might want their own child.

[Jenna]

Yeah, I think they want their child. They specifically want his sperm.

[Peter Kim]

You're gonna feel left out then.

[Jenna]

Great.

[Peter Kim]

I don't know. That sounds dangerous.

[Esther]

It is. That's what I'm saying. It's like, I think like in theory, it's so noble and beautiful and not.

[Jenna]

Noble or beautiful, by the way.

[Esther]

No, I'm saying the idea that you are giving them something they've always dreamed about, which is a family and a child. This is something that you're like, hey, I'm open to that is wonderful. Like what? Great. What a great way.

[Jenna]

But it's also selfish because I want a child somewhere around there. And I know that R wants a child. And so there's. There's a part of it that's also, for me that's not just like, I'm a nice, noble person. It's like, oh, I could also kind.

[Peter Kim]

Of have your cake and eat it too.

[Jenna]

Yes, but listen, we haven't. It's not like pray about This I.

[Esther]

Think pray on it. Real.

[Kalila]

Crazy.

[Jenna]

I mean, it's mainly up to him.

[Kalila]

What is he.

[Esther]

No, it's you. You're in the relationship.

[Jenna]

I know, but like, if he says, hell yeah, which he's like light years away.

[Peter Kim]

Just want to jerk off into a cop.

[Jenna]

No, he's not. Like, he's. He's a little more sensitive about this stuff than I am.

[Peter Kim]

Like being a fob.

[Jenna]

Like, he really wants to, but he doesn't take this lightly. Like I. Yeah. I'm like, oh, okay. And he's like, girl, when I even just with asking him, he's like, okay.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, he's I speculative. He's like, you're the horror thing.

[Kalila]

You're not a thinker.

[Jenna]

You're not a thinker.

[Peter Kim]

You've never had a thought.

[Jenna]

No. Today I almost had one thought and then I forgot it. And it was only about heated rivalry.

[Kalila]

Do you think that he's anywhere near interested in this?

[Jenna]

I think he's not a no. And that he has been thinking about it, but I think that he would lean more toward. No. Unless I turn like 45, I have no eggs on the table, and he's like, okay, well, this is my only shot cuz I want to be with you.

[Esther]

Impossible. You pcos, you have so many eggs.

[Jenna]

Well, does someone want to pay for me to freeze them then? Yeah.

[Esther]

Tell me the cost.

[Peter Kim]

Cost?

[Kalila]

I don't know.

[Jenna]

You don't know?

[Esther]

I know the cost. I know the cost. I have a good doctor too.

[Peter Kim]

$10 million.

[Esther]

That's not.

[Jenna]

If I could freeze my eggs, I would feel like, okay, deal.

[Esther]

How about this? If I have a really good financial year. No.

[Kalila]

If I don't want you.

[Esther]

You just asked if I could pay for your eggs. If. If I have a really good financial year and things actually pick up in the next, like, year and a half, I will. Without ever even mentioning it ever again, I will.

[Jenna]

You could freeze your eggs. I don't know about that. That sounds scary.

[Peter Kim]

Do it.

[Esther]

I think that if it's like it. If it will bring you relief, and that's stop being relief.

[Kalila]

I'm. I would be scared too.

[Esther]

What about, like, harvesting eggs?

[Kalila]

No. Of taking the deal.

[Jenna]

Yeah.

[Esther]

What am I gonna do? Get the back if I'm angry.

[Kalila]

No, no, no.

[Jenna]

I'm just like, scared of borrowing money from friends.

[Esther]

You're not borrowing.

[Jenna]

Because I've lent money to.

[Peter Kim]

It's a gift. You're gonna gift it?

[Esther]

I'm gifting it.

[Peter Kim]

Oh, she don't have to pay you back.

[Esther]

No, she's Been my lifelong.

[Jenna]

She's been.

[Peter Kim]

Horse. You better get on this. This horse is.

[Kalila]

You asked for this cuz you said who wants to pay for my egg?

[Peter Kim]

But I was looking at the camera.

[Kalila]

Meaning the people you want so random.

[Esther]

To pay for your eggs.

[Peter Kim]

Okay, how about this?

[Jenna]

Let's do a.

[Peter Kim]

Then you match it. No, we put a tier on the Patreon, obviously.

[Esther]

Jenna's eggs.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, Jenna's eggs on the Patreon. Yes.

[Jenna]

That's something that I would do a gofundme for actually. Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

I think that about the friend.

[Kalila]

That's nice to offer, but it does I just to like speak articulate for her how what's coming up for me. It's like I don't articulate for her.

[Jenna]

What'S coming up for me.

[Kalila]

It's like scary to receive much like and it's just like. It's so scary.

[Jenna]

It's scary. But I'll shake your hand.

[Esther]

What's going to. What is so if. Listen, it's not. I know.

[Jenna]

It's not about me feeling like I owe you something my entire life.

[Esther]

I know, I understand that. But I. I wish that we would have enough foundation of a decade long friendship to be like, you know, I already know Kalila, she'll forget about it the moment I know.

[Jenna]

I tried to Venmo her once because I was leaving for a trip in 2016. Someone stole my bag at. Someone stole my phone out of my bag at the Urban Outfit. Kalila. Without even thinking, I call her sobbing like, I don't know what to do. I'm gonna go. I'm going to Verizon right now. Venmo's me $500 until I made more money and could try to pay her back. I thought about it all the time. Like I owe her. And then I tried to Venmo her back and she venmos it back to me and she's like, bitch, don't get me started. Like I will be in a Venmo war with you. And she goes, and if you send it back, it's sitting there. So no one gets that money.

[Esther]

But I promise you, I don't even remember that story. Thank you for remembering. I don't give a if I'm in a position to. If I'm rolling in it, swimming in it. If I don't have it, I don't have it. Right, right. But if like, if I have it, like why the here.

[Jenna]

No, I get it because that's like my goal to have money. To literally be able to be like, oh, let's go out to eat, my friends. Oh, you need something? Oh, I got you. I got you. Like, that feels good. Yeah.

[Kalila]

Like, that even makes me uncomfortable. Like, when Jenna will pick something up, like, for me from Air1 or something, and I'll be like, what do I owe you? And she's like. And I'm like, no, like, you have to tell me what I owe you.

[Jenna]

Esther's like, just tell me. I'm like, we'll figure it out.

[Kalila]

No, I'm like, figure it out now. Like, I don't want.

[Jenna]

And then I leave. And she like, three weeks later, two weeks later, one week later, every week, she's like, hey, so the Air One thing that you picked. I'm like, I don't know. I have to look at the receipt, dude. I don't know.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, like, don't want to tell.

[Kalila]

I'm not leaving that. Lingering.

[Jenna]

Yeah, it's like, I don't remember. It sounds like a lot of work.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, I'm getting mine.

[Jenna]

No, I do want to get paid back, but it's. It's hard when it's like, a friend who's so close to you, and it's.

[Kalila]

Like, I know you don't want to. You. You're like, you. You're like, almost like her in a way where it's like, you want to be chill, and it's like, it comes.

[Jenna]

But I'm also poor, so it's hard to be chill.

[Esther]

Yeah.

[Kalila]

And I don't. I'm not chill about money.

[Peter Kim]

I'm so not chill about money.

[Kalila]

I'm like, if I owe you. If you owe me, like, let's figure it out.

[Esther]

Oh, if I owe someone, I don't.

[Jenna]

Oh, that just reminds me.

[Kalila]

Exactly. But that's what.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, that's what it feels.

[Kalila]

Exactly.

[Esther]

But you're right. I do understand it coming from point. If, like, if I owed someone, I. There's a reason why I don't owe anyone. Yeah. It feels gross.

[Jenna]

And I oftentimes, as you guys know, I'm running errands for people or picking things up for people. It adds up. Yeah, Oftentimes.

[Kalila]

And I want to be able to ask you to grab me. Yeah. When your places.

[Jenna]

That never comes back to me. That's like hundreds and hundreds. Because I go like, oh, that was only $5. Oh, that was only $10. Oh, that was this. And then I'm like, if it was six people who I picked something up for, and now I'm like, why don't I have money? So.

[Peter Kim]

Yeah, you need to keep track it's true.

[Jenna]

I think Venmo has helped me because I go, like, I'll just. Venmo, request you.

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Peter Kim]

Yes. There you go. I have to apologize to you about what happened outside.

[Jenna]

This is so good.

[Peter Kim]

Can we move it to the Patreon?

[Kalila]

Yeah.

[Jenna]

Is that cool?

[Kalila]

So, Slugs, continue this conversation over with us at the Patreon. It's about to get heated.

[Jenna]

Rivalry. He did rivalry again.

[Kalila]

Yes. And thank you so much for being here. This flew by. But we have so much more to get to. And we'll see you on the Patreon. Or we'll see you next week with a brand new episode.