True Crime Obsessed – Episode 449: Trainwreck: Poop Cruise (Aug 26, 2025)

Overview

In this spirited and irreverent episode, hosts Patrick Hinds and Gillian Pensavalle break down the Netflix documentary "Trainwreck: Poop Cruise." With their trademark blend of humor, sass, and heart, they tackle the infamous 2013 Carnival "Triumph" cruise disaster—better known as the “Poop Cruise”—where a fire at sea left 4,500 people stranded without power, toilets, or hope of rescue, resulting in chaos, makeshift tent cities, overflowing human waste, and a media frenzy. The episode deftly combines hilarious hot takes with sobering critiques of cruise industry failures and the terrifying realities of maritime law.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Why Do People Even Go on Cruises? (00:04–01:25)

• Gillian jokes about rooting for the ship, not the passengers:
  “Did anyone else, like, kind of start rooting for the ship at any point? Because these people are awful.” (A, 00:04)
• Both hosts are deeply cruise-skeptical: everything about cruises sounds nightmarish—crowds, lack of autonomy, chaos.

Meet the Main Characters: Passengers & Crew (04:39–06:11; 09:00–10:34)

• Devin: All about his fiancée’s father; oblivious, anxious, and oddly focused on not pooping in a bag.
• Larry & Rebecca: A likable father-daughter duo, on the cruise for post-divorce bonding.
• The "White Lotus" Bachelorettes (Kaylin, Ashley, Jamie): More interested in wild partying than safety, skipping briefings, and quickly intoxicated.
  “We put our luggage down and we went straight up to the bar. …I remember being like, we’re not going to need this information. What are the chances?” (Ashley, 09:36)
• Jen, Cruise Director: Upbeat “vacation Barbie” tasked with managing fun and disaster.
• Hannah, Bartender: Russian, there for the “fun”—and gives frank insight into staff escapades.

The Cruise Begins: High Spirits, Safety Briefings Ignored (10:34–11:54)

• Most passengers are there to party. Hosts highlight hubris: ignoring safety drills, mocking the “muster station” info.

Day at Sea, Catastrophe Strikes (15:25–23:34)

• After a wild stop in Cozumel, calamity erupts:
  “Day four begins with the last thing you want to hear after you’ve been drinking in the sun for three days: 5:28am, incessant beeping …Alpha team, alpha team, alpha team…” (A, 16:31)
• Fire in the engine room knocks out power, propulsion, and all amenities.
• Jen, cruise director:
  “Everything is completely under control. You have nothing to worry about. No need to go to your emergency station…” (Jen’s announcement, ~23:16)
• Within minutes, the truth is apparent—no power, no water, no working toilets, no air conditioning, no cell service.

The Collapse of Order: Poop Bags, Tent Cities, and Lasagna Toilets (25:37–56:42)

• Toilets stop working: Passengers told to urinate in showers and defecate in red “biohazard” bags, then leave them in hallways.

  “If you do need to do a number two, we ask that you please do it in the red bag and drop it off in the bin.” (Jen, 26:25)

• Revulsion and panic. People start taking Imodium to try to avoid the inevitable.
• Makeshift “tent cities” emerge on deck as heat and stench make cabins uninhabitable.
  “It was everyone for themselves. …stealing shit and ‘running back to their camps.’ I can’t breathe, this is incredibly scary.” (A, 42:14)
• Food runs out; people wait hours for meager, soggy sandwiches. Hoarding and Lord of the Flies dynamics take over.
• Lasagna toilets:
  “People were covering the poop with the toilet paper and then again pooping on top of it...It was like a lasagna.” (Chef, 53:50)
• Open bar decision: Inexplicably, Carnival opens the bar. Boozed-up passengers escalate the chaos; fights, public sex, and further filth ensue.

Media Frenzy & Maritime Law (34:29–63:11)

• CNN anchor Brooke Baldwin notes initial media skepticism—until the “poop cruise” visuals hit the wire.
• CNN (and the world) obsessed as news leaked out; Carnival’s PR tried to minimize the story.
• Enter Frank Spagnoletti, the cigar-chomping maritime lawyer, who exposes Carnival’s record of repeated generator fires and lack of meaningful safety plans.

  “There were nine incidents of faulty fuel lines while these vessels were at sea that were potentially causing fires on board...that’s called Russian roulette with people’s lives.” (Frank, 61:08)

• Maritime law segment: Cruise contracts strip passengers of basic rights; no guaranteed safety, food quality, or sanitation.
  "Carnival's attorneys say...the ticket contract makes absolutely no guarantee for safe passage, a seaworthy vessel, adequate and wholesome food, and sanitary and safe living conditions." (A, 62:38)
• Realities of jurisdiction: cruise ships fly the flag of countries with the weakest regulations, making legal recourse and investigations nearly impossible—especially for assault victims.

The End: What (Little) Was Done and Aftermath (63:15–66:44)

• Ship finally makes port in Mobile, Alabama after EIGHT days at sea (intended as a 3-day cruise).
• Reunion scenes with families, intense gratitude for the crew—but little corporate accountability.
• Carnival settles nearly all lawsuits; offers meager refund, $500, and a “free” future cruise.
  “After this incident, Carnival spent $115 million cleaning, repairing, and refitting the Triumph. Today she still sails under her new name, the Carnival Sunrise. According to TikTok, it still reeks.” (A, 64:15)
• Maritime law and exploitation remain unaddressed; hosts urge listeners to be “careful” and cautious around cruises.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Did anyone else, like, kind of start rooting for the ship at any point? Because these people are awful.” (A, 00:04)
• “We left our dignity in Cozumel.” (Ashley, 16:14)
• “If you do need to do a number two, what we’re going to do is deliver some red bags to all of the bathrooms on board…” (Jen, 26:25)
• “It was a layer after layer after layer. It was like a lasagna.” (Ship’s chef, 54:06)
• “Carnival’s attorneys say…the ticket contract makes absolutely no guarantee for safe passage, a seaworthy vessel, adequate and wholesome food, and sanitary and safe living conditions.” (A, 62:38)
• “After this incident, Carnival spent $115 million…Today she still sails under her new name, the Carnival Sunrise. According to TikTok, it still reeks.” (A, 64:15)
• “Just be careful. We love you.” (A, 67:11)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:04 – Opening banter; cruise skepticism
• 04:39–06:11; 09:00–10:34 – Introductions to the main passengers/crew
• 15:25–23:34 – The fire breaks out, cruise chaos begins
• 25:37–31:42 – Poop bags, panic, and why lifeboats weren't deployed
• 42:06–46:46 – Tent cities, survival mode, the descent into mayhem
• 53:40–56:42 – ‘Lasagna’ toilets, open bar disaster, scenes from the ‘tent cities’
• 34:29–35:32; 50:04–51:56 – Media coverage ramps up; CNN goes all-in
• 61:08 – Frank the maritime lawyer’s eye-opening stats on safety failures
• 62:38 – Shocking small print in cruise contracts; zero guarantee of anything
• 63:15–64:15 – Status of the ship post-disaster; Carnival’s upgrades and rebrand
• 65:00–66:44 – Maritime law and the bleak lack of regulation or passenger rights

Tone, Highlights, and Listener Takeaways

• The hosts’ style is breezy, quick-witted, and unfiltered, veering from gross-out humor to genuine outrage at corporate negligence.
• The real villains: Carnival Corporation’s chronic under-preparedness and callous disregard for passenger safety.
• Despite the humor, the episode hammers home the dangers and lack of oversight for the cruise industry, especially around passenger safety and recourse.
• Listeners are left laughing—but also with a newfound wariness toward cruise vacations.

Where Are They Now? (63:24–64:33)

• Ashley (Bride): Got married; used red poop bags in wedding gifts
• Devin: Still vacations with his father-in-law
• Larry & Rebecca: Still cruising—but never with Carnival
• The Ship: Triumph is now Carnival Sunrise (“still reeks,” according to TikTok)

Final Thoughts

Trainwreck: Poop Cruise exposes not just the stomach-turning details of an infamous mishap at sea, but the larger, persistent issues of industry negligence and legal gray zones that haunt cruise culture to this day. With laughter, empathy, and side-eye, the hosts deliver both a wild ride and a timely warning: enjoy your vacation—but know what you’re signing up for.

Key takeaway: If you cruise, “just be careful. We love you.” (A, 67:11)