Podcast Summary: Trust Me - REWIND: Elana Auerbach - OneTaste (aka the Orgasm Cult)

Podcast: Trust Me: Cults, Extreme Belief, and Manipulation
Hosts: Lola Blanc, Megan Elizabeth
Guest: Ilana Auerbach
Original Release Date: December 31, 2025
Topic: Firsthand account of Ilana Auerbach’s experience in OneTaste, an organization known for "orgasmic meditation" (OM), its cultic structure, manipulative practices, and resulting harm.

Main Theme & Purpose

This episode dives deeply into the cultish world of OneTaste, often dubbed "the Orgasm Cult," through the lens of Ilana Auerbach, a survivor and early member. Ilana discusses how OneTaste’s seductive sexuality and claims of empowerment were used to manipulate and control, blending personal trauma, groupthink, financial abuse, and sexual coercion. The hosts and Ilana dissect how such groups appeal to universal human desires for connection, meaning, and liberation, but ultimately enforce emotional and psychological bondage.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Background of OneTaste and OM (Orgasmic Meditation)

[11:40] Lola summarizes:

• OneTaste: Founded in San Francisco by Nicole Daedone, marketed as a sexuality-focused wellness company.
• Core practice: Orgasmic meditation (OM) — a clothed man strokes a naked woman for 15 minutes, without it becoming reciprocal sex. Originally practiced in group circles.
• Ilana clarifies: The practice predates Nicole Daedone and was called "deliberate orgasm," originating with Vic Barranco and the “Morehouses”—hedonistic sex communes in the Bay Area.

2. Ilana’s Entry Into the Pleasure Community

[12:50-19:20] Ilana recounts:

• After her divorce, Ilana sought more meaning, pleasure, and community—feeling “famished for a life that makes sense.” Her vulnerability was exploited.
• Ilana and partner Bill entered this world through friends and found the community fun and sexually liberating at first.

3. Meeting Nicole Daedone & Early Manipulation

[19:20-22:58] Ilana describes:

• Nicole’s charisma was intoxicating — “I put her up on a pedestal. Like this is what an empowered woman looks like.” (19:22)
• Nicole quickly took control, even dominating established group leaders.
• Early OM technique: Participants “plateau” at the edge of orgasm, never climaxing — later recognized as a manipulative tool to keep women in “a heightened state of titillation and yet not having that come down.”

4. Psychology & Techniques of Manipulation

[32:40-36:57] Ilana describes Nicole’s tactics:

• “Pulling desires” sessions: Nicole would probe for members’ deepest desires, but direct them toward her agenda (e.g., pushing Ilana to say she wanted a public orgasm ‘demo’).
• “Nicole agreed something was true if it matched what she wanted to hear... If you had doubt, she knew how to increase your doubt until what she told you was true became what you believed.” (36:12)

5. Escalation: Financial & Emotional Control

[36:35-41:18]

• Ilana and Bill were charged $15,000 in 2004 for a demo (“an hour-long orgasm” event) that never truly materialized.
• Nicole’s growing vision: a center where access to her was gated by the amount of money, time, or devotion—a classic cult hierarchy.
• Ilana worked full time for free, became the “second in command,” and moved in with Nicole’s devotees, losing her own financial independence.

6. Red Flags, Doubt, and Disillusionment

Moments that stood out:

• Nicole always took the best for herself, e.g., claiming the master bedroom and refusing to help clean; “flashed back to my Zen teacher…mopping the floor… such a contrast.” (53:20)
• Group compliance: Surrendering to Nicole was demanded, and dissenters (like Bill) were ostracized.
• Ilana experienced dissociation during sexual activities with Nicole: “It’s kind of like an abuser… it feels so confusing, because often it feels really good… but yet it’s so conflictual…” (55:01)

7. Breaking the Spell and Leaving

[61:15-62:22] Ilana’s realization:

• Watching Nicole use another member’s sexual energy as a recruitment tool during a live demo shattered Ilana’s belief: “I saw it for the first time… She was using Patricia and her sacred orgasmic energy… to get these people into a course.”
• The cult’s hold persisted: “It took years for me to really get her… vampiric tendrils out of my system.” Healing and forgiveness came only after significant inner work.

8. Aftermath & Broader Lessons

[65:16-75:27]

• Nicole’s influence has only grown, with celebrity endorsements and higher price tags ($4,000-$60,000 for programs).
• Financial, sexual, and psychological harms remain prevalent; manipulation by charismatic, controlling female leaders is under-recognized.
• “Nicole was the unequivocal, charismatic leader who established herself as the single source of truth, full stop… The message Nicole sold was liberation. But in actuality, what you received was bondage.” (72:42)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Susceptibility:
  • “Overkill through excesses… is acted out by women who are famished for a life that has meaning and makes sense for them.” – Ilana quoting Clarissa Pinkala Estes (13:43)
  • “I put her up on a pedestal. Like this is what an empowered woman looks like. And I want to be that.” – Ilana (19:22)
• On Manipulation:
  • “Nicole agreed that something was true if it matched what she wanted to hear. So clearly, that's what she wanted to hear… If you said something she didn’t like, she called it a lie.” – Ilana (35:58)
  • “What you told you was true became what you believed.” – Ilana (36:33)
• On the OM Practice:
  • “It was never a spiritual thing. Nicole renamed it to market it as a spiritual practice and as a meditation, mindfulness practice. It was never about bringing your whole self.” – Ilana (49:10)
  • “For me, a due date with Nicole became getting off how Nicole wanted me to get off, instead of getting off the way that is natural for me.” – Ilana (56:12)
• On Leaving & Healing:
  • “What I found since… is many people stayed for years. It took years for me to really get her… ‘vampiric tendrils’ out of my system and out of my body with the help of a really powerful sister healer.” – Ilana (62:18)
  • “The message Nicole sold was liberation. But in actuality, what you received was bondage.” – Ilana (72:42)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [11:40] — Introduction to OneTaste and OM as described by Lola and clarified by Ilana
• [19:20] — Ilana meets Nicole and experiences the magnetic group dynamic
• [32:40] — Nicole’s “pulling desires” technique exposed
• [35:58] — Manipulation: “If you said something she didn’t like, she called it a lie.”
• [36:35] — Financial abuse: The $15,000 “demo” and working for free
• [41:18] — Nicole demands total surrender and exploits core wounds
• [53:20] — Realization: Nicole refuses to help, contrasting with true spiritual leaders
• [55:01] — Ilana describes dissociation during coerced OM sessions
• [61:15] — Spell breaks: Ilana sees through live demo’s manipulative purpose
• [72:42] — Summary: “Liberation” as bondage and classic cult features
• [74:56] — Ilana’s final message: Trust yourself, “Our bodies don't lie to us.”

Broader Reflections & Lessons

• The hosts and Ilana warn of the seductive rhetoric of self-empowerment and community—especially when those leading demand total devotion, financial exploitation, and sexual conformity.
• Female cult leaders can wield the same power and cause the same harm as men; charisma and “women’s empowerment” can mask profound manipulation.
• The importance of outside practices of grounding, critical distance, and relationships that foster returning to self.
• The story is a cautionary tale: “If something feels off, it is off. Our bodies don't lie to us.” (Ilana, 74:56)

Closing Thoughts

This episode provides an unflinching, detailed look at how “wellness,” “empowerment,” and sexual liberation can be weaponized for manipulation and harm. Through Ilana’s self-aware and compassionate reflection, it highlights universal vulnerabilities and offers hope for recognizing, escaping, and healing from cultic dynamics.

For listeners seeking compassionate, firsthand insight into the psychology and tactics of modern cults—especially those masquerading as sexual liberation—this episode is both a warning and a guide.