Two Hot Takes: Episode 227 - "Disclose or Nah?!"
Release Date: July 31, 2025
Introduction
In Episode 227 of Two Hot Takes, host Morgan Absher and co-host Mikayla delve into the nuanced and often controversial topic of disclosure within relationships. Drawing from a variety of Reddit stories, listener write-ins, and internet anecdotes, the duo explores when it's essential to disclose personal information and when it might be unnecessary or even harmful. The overarching question for the episode is: "To disclose or not to disclose?"
1. Am I the Asshole for Not Disclosing Plastic Surgery to My Boyfriend?
Summary: A 26-year-old woman grapples with whether she is in the wrong for not initially disclosing her past plastic surgeries to her 25-year-old boyfriend. Having had a nose job at 22 and breast augmentation at 23, she did not mention these procedures early in her four-month relationship. The issue surfaced when her boyfriend expressed disdain for women with implants after seeing a friend's photos, leading to feelings of betrayal and questioning her actions.
Discussion: Mikayla asserts, “He is the asshole” for being derogatory towards women with implants and not appreciating her for who she is. Morgan adds, “Don't talk about any women like that. That's gross.” The hosts agree that cosmetic surgeries, when not affecting the partner directly, do not require immediate disclosure. They emphasize the importance of honesty but also recognize that personal enhancements like nose jobs or breast augmentations fall under individual choices that don't necessarily impact the relationship dynamics.
Notable Quotes:
- Morgan (01:52): “If you can touch it, they're real.”
- Top Comment: “You lucked out that he showed you this side at four months in. You could have been married before you found out he's this shallow and misogynistic.”
Conclusion: The consensus is clear: the woman is not the asshole. The boyfriend's shallow standards and lack of respect make him the real problem. Disclosure in this context is deemed unnecessary unless directly impacting the partner's well-being.
2. Am I the Asshole for Not Disclosing I'm Not Christian to My Client?
Summary: A commissioned artist, who is not Christian, created a piece featuring Christian iconography for a client. When asked about her favorite scripture, she admitted her non-Christian beliefs, leading the client to feel deceived and question the spiritual value of the artwork. The artist wonders if she should have disclosed her faith upfront.
Discussion: Morgan and Mikayla discuss the importance of context in disclosures. They argue that personal beliefs do not necessarily impact professional services unless explicitly requested by the client. Morgan states, “If you have those preferences, you should go out and… ask upfront.” They highlight that clients seeking specific intentions behind commissioned work should communicate their expectations clearly rather than assuming the artist's personal beliefs.
Notable Quotes:
- Morgan (32:10): “If you have those preferences, you should go out and, like, ensure that and ask the questions up front.”
- Top Comment: “You don't discriminate, but apparently they do.”
Conclusion: The artist is not the asshole. Professionalism entails delivering services regardless of personal beliefs, and unless faith-based intentions are a specified requirement, non-disclosure does not constitute wrongdoing.
3. Reporting an Unethical Therapist Who Married a Former Patient
Summary: A woman discovers that her ex-boyfriend married their shared couple's therapist a year after their sessions ended. Feeling violated and disturbed by the therapist's dual relationships, she contemplates reporting her therapist to the American Counseling Association.
Discussion: Morgan and Mikayla delve into the ethical boundaries therapists must uphold. They highlight that forming personal relationships with former patients is strictly prohibited within ethical and legal guidelines, typically requiring a waiting period of two to five years post-therapy. The hosts emphasize the abuse of power dynamics inherent in such relationships and the potential psychological harm to clients.
Notable Quotes:
- Morgan (43:51): “After therapy ends, there is a waiting period before a therapist can date a former patient, which varies, but is typically at least two to five years.”
- Top Comment: “Please report her.”
Conclusion: The therapist's actions are deemed unethical and unacceptable. The episode underscores the importance of maintaining professional boundaries to protect clients from potential exploitation and psychological harm.
4. Am I the Asshole for Using My Friend’s Nail Clippers and Causing Tension?
Summary: A 30-year-old man house-sat for his friend, using his friend's nail clippers to address a split nail. Upon the friend's return, it was discovered that his girlfriend was germ-conscious and upset about the clippers being used, leading the boyfriend to lie about their usage. This deception escalated tensions, making the man question if he is at fault.
Discussion: Mikayla finds the situation perplexing, questioning the extent of the girlfriend's germophobia and the boyfriend's dishonesty over a minor issue. Morgan echoes this confusion, emphasizing that minor breaches should not warrant such significant relational fallout. They suggest that open communication about small matters could prevent unnecessary drama and distrust.
Notable Quotes:
- Morgan (64:11): “You are making it an issue by just not communicating.”
- Top Comment: “He put himself in this situation by lying and his girlfriend is super weird for wanting the entire bathroom deep cleaned over a pair of clippers.”
Conclusion: The man is not the asshole. Using nail clippers during house-sitting is a minor issue, and the escalation stems from the boyfriend's and girlfriend's overreactions and lack of straightforward communication. Transparency could have easily resolved the misunderstanding.
5. My Wife Thinks We're Soulmates, but I Think I Settled
Summary: A man, after nine years together and six years of marriage, realizes he has never been in love with his wife. He acknowledges her positive qualities but feels their relationship was founded on his need for stability rather than genuine love. Conflicted about ending the marriage without causing harm, he wrestles with feelings of guilt and regret.
Discussion: Morgan and Mikayla empathize with his struggle, highlighting the pain of unrequited love within a long-term relationship. They discuss societal pressures to conform to traditional relationship milestones and the importance of honest self-reflection. The hosts encourage open and compassionate communication, possibly involving therapy to navigate the complex emotions involved in ending such a relationship.
Notable Quotes:
- Mikayla: “She deserves someone who loves her for who she is.”
- Morgan (83:04): “And I think this person is potentially not coming from a negative place. It's not about mal intent.”
Conclusion: While the man is grappling with a deeply personal and painful realization, the episode underscores the importance of authenticity in relationships. Remaining in a marriage without love is portrayed as emotionally taxing for both parties, suggesting that honest disclosure, though difficult, is ultimately healthier.
6. My Boyfriend Kept Asking Me to Moan Louder. Turns Out He Was Recording Me.
Summary: A 25-year-old woman discovers that her 27-year-old boyfriend was secretly recording their intimate moments without her consent. After confronting him, she learns he shared these recordings with friends under the guise of jokes. Feeling violated, she immediately ends the relationship, blocks him, and files a report.
Discussion: Morgan and Mikayla condemn the boyfriend's unethical and invasive behavior. They discuss the critical importance of consent, especially concerning recording intimate encounters. The hosts highlight the betrayal of trust and the severe emotional impact such actions can have on the victim. They emphasize that regardless of the legality in certain states, the moral breach is intolerable.
Notable Quotes:
- Mikayla: “He's a terrible person. Saying it was a joke and then having his friends defend him too.”
- Morgan (112:01): “Consent is key. Consent is necessary and needed.”
Conclusion: The boyfriend is unequivocally the asshole. Secretly recording intimate moments without consent is a profound violation of trust and personal boundaries, warranting immediate termination of the relationship and legal action.
Closing Thoughts
Throughout Episode 227, Morgan and Mikayla navigate the intricate landscape of disclosure in personal relationships, highlighting the thin line between necessary honesty and overstepping boundaries. They emphasize the importance of context, consent, and respectful communication in maintaining healthy relationships. The hosts encourage listeners to evaluate their own boundaries and the ethical considerations of disclosure, fostering a community grounded in mutual respect and understanding.
Notable Takeaway: "Disclosure is not just about honesty; it's about understanding the impact of sharing personal information and respecting both your own boundaries and those of others."
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Thank you for tuning into Two Hot Takes! Join Morgan and Mikayla next week as they continue to explore the hottest takes on dating, relationships, and life’s juicy stories.