Two Hot Takes Podcast – Episode 233: Updates or Bust?!
Release Date: September 11, 2025
Host: Morgan Absher
Co-Host: Lauren
Episode Overview
This episode of Two Hot Takes is dedicated to the thrill (and sometimes agony) of Reddit story updates—focusing on popular posts curated by prolific Reddit user and “Best of Redditor Updates” contributor, directcatpillar77. Morgan and Lauren discuss relationship drama, wedding blowouts, financial blunders in the bedroom, unhinged neighbors, and a slew of listener-favorite internet oddities. The recurring theme? The messy, unsatisfying, or sometimes truly jaw-dropping ways people’s stories wrap up—or don’t. Expect deep dives, honest advice, hot takes, and signature humor.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. [06:49] Story 1: Stepping Down as Maid of Honor
- Summary:
OP (Original Poster) had to step down as maid of honor two months before her friend Jamie’s wedding after enduring unreasonable demands and emotional manipulation, all intensified by Jamie’s recent loss of her mother. Jamie’s grief contributed, but her increasingly toxic behavior (including financial pressure and guilt trips) became unbearable. - Notable Moments & Quotes:
- “You should not be getting married because all it’s doing is pushing you away from people in your life that care about you.” — Lauren (11:10)
- “It’s wild beyond wild. And it’s hard because you want to give her so much grace and empathy… but at the same time, you’re just getting met with abuse.” — Morgan (11:43)
- Discussion of boundaries, friendship, and weddings as stressful, revealing times.
- The hosts critique the normalization of financially demanding pre-wedding events.
- [18:46] The Fallout & Updates:
- After stepping down, OP and Haley receive vindictive, formal letters from Jamie on her wedding anniversary, returning old letters, and even including her mother’s funeral book—highlighting Jamie’s ongoing emotional instability and abusive tendencies.
- “[Jamie] mailed back copies of old letters Haley and I had written her years ago, returned like evidence... even sent me her mother’s funeral book.” — Morgan (24:11 & 25:19)
- The hosts note Jamie’s behavior as love-bombing, guilt-tripping, and rewriting history: “Love bombing when she wanted something, guilt tripping when she didn’t get her way, and rewriting history to make herself the victim.” (Morgan, 26:21)
2. [39:50] Story 2: The Corporate Finance Lecture… During Sex?
- Summary:
A woman posts to AITA (Am I The Asshole?) after yelling at her boyfriend to “shut up” when he starts launching into a finance lecture during sex—his current obsession is her company’s private equity buyout. The host explores communication norms and differing thresholds for “mean” language in a relationship, acknowledging that sometimes “shut up” is a reasonable breaking point when context is so wildly inappropriate. - Notable Moments & Quotes:
- “I can’t think of a faster way to kill a lady boner than by mentioning Jay Powell and the Fed.” — Reddit Comment, echoed by Morgan (45:50)
- Discussion on communication, boundaries, and not taking partner enthusiasm for granted.
- [48:38] Mini-Update:
OP mentions her boyfriend discovered the Reddit post on a finance forum, but no update on what happened next.
3. [50:49] Story 3: ‘My Wife Had a Wild Phase Before Me’—Missing Out FOMO
- Summary:
OP feels resentful after “glowing up” in adulthood, wishing he’d had the sexual experiences his wife enjoyed before their relationship. After his sister’s inflammatory advice (“It’s unfair your wife got to do those things!”), he opens up to his wife—revealing he feels undesirable at home and gets more attention elsewhere. Their honest talk brings deep emotions and mixed reactions from the community and hosts alike. - Notable Moments & Quotes:
- “To be blunt, I don’t care that my wife finds me attractive. Because I know I look good now.” — OP, read by Morgan (52:49, 59:09)
- “If you constantly feel like you’re missing out, I do think then your wife is not…it.” — Morgan (58:43)
- Lauren and Morgan criticize OP’s focus on outside validation and the potential emotional coercion of mentioning other women’s attention.
- “The grass is never greener—it’s just different grass.” — Reddit Comment (60:49), praised by Morgan.
- [65:38] Update:
OP and wife have “the talk.” She promises to initiate intimacy more. He pushes for much “more,” brings up attention from other women, and she breaks down. Morgan notes: “He was telling her this as a way to motivate her to spice things up,” describing it as borderline emotional blackmail.
4. [76:36] Story 4: The Creepy Minimalist Boyfriend Apartment
- Summary:
OP is thrown by her boyfriend’s unfurnished, sterile apartment devoid of personal effects except for a mattress, expensive clothes, and an ominous stack of self-help/manipulation books. Her investigation (including having him followed) triggers a debate: is he a secretive psycho, a workaholic, or just a 22-year-old bachelor who doesn’t care about decor? - Notable Moments & Quotes:
- “It’s off putting at best. He’s highly driven, highly compartmentalized, utilitarian man who has no need for aesthetics. Like an alien who came to Earth undercover…” — Reddit Comment, read by Morgan (84:04)
- The hosts agree avoiding a boyfriend’s home for a year is a red flag, but debate whether it’s sinister or just immature.
- Lauren: “If my boyfriend didn’t let me come over to his house for almost a year, my guess wouldn’t be serial killer. I’d think married.” (82:10)
- No Update:
The post is years old; no resolution is available.
5. [92:47] Story 5: Bread-Centric Witchcraft & Chicken Hexes Next Door
- Summary:
A listener’s neighbor becomes convinced OP hexed her sourdough starter, prompting escalating magical “counter-offensives:” midnight chants, chicken sacrifices, sage burning, and the offering of “friendship water” to drink. Police are called after the neighbor begins burying spaghetti and shaking salt in OP’s fenced backyard. - Notable Moments & Quotes:
- “All caps. I literally had to bleach my doorstep.” — Original Post (94:04)
- “The night that I posted the story… I saw her burying a Ziploc bag of cooked spaghetti under my car and yelling that she has to do this to confuse the bread spirits.” — Update read by Morgan (98:26)
- Lauren, laughing: “Linda, you’re insufferable.” (100:20)
6. [103:37] Story 6: ‘Tig Bitties’ — The Stuffed Animal Slip-Up
- Summary:
A dad jokingly suggests “bitties” as the last name for his son’s stuffed tiger “Tig,” so the boy proudly names it “Tig Bitties.” Mom is unimpressed, but the internet loves it. - Notable Moments & Quotes:
- “Imagine this kid bringing it to show and tell. ‘Hey, this is my tiger, Tig Bitties.’ I would be so pissed.” — Lauren (103:57)
- Final verdict: inappropriate but hilarious, “not the asshole.”
- Lighthearted wrap-up on childhood stories and harmless parent mischief.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “Poetic justice. Can I say that right there? I don’t even know what that actually means.” — Lauren, learning about literary irony (21:43)
- “Your silence was never silence. It was knives. Every time you didn’t text me I heard the echo of your teeth grinding like the church bells when my mother was lowered down.” — Jamie’s unhinged letter to OP, read by Morgan (36:13)
- “J Pow sounds like what Justin would want his nickname to be.” — Morgan (46:07)
- “The grass is never greener—it’s just different grass.” — Reddit Comment (60:49)
Timestamps for Important Segments
- 06:49 – Story 1: Stepping down as maid of honor (plus all obsessive post-wedding fallout)
- 18:46 – The update: The packages, the letters, and final closure
- 39:50 – Story 2: The ‘corporate finance’ sex talk disaster
- 50:49 – Story 3: ‘I missed my wild phase’ husband opens up (& overshares)
- 65:38 – Update: OP’s talk with his wife, and fallout
- 76:36 – Story 4: The spartan, possibly sinister, boyfriend’s apartment
- 92:47 – Story 5: The bread-hexing neighbor
- 103:37 – Story 6: Tig Bitties, the stuffed animal mishap
- 108:22 – Hosts encourage listener stories & discuss hilarious childhood beliefs
Tone & Language
The entire episode balances empathy, humor, and real-talk. Morgan and Lauren are candid, supportive, and critical when warranted—often relating stories to personal experiences and always drawing larger lessons about boundaries, communication, and the wild ride of 21st-century relationships.
Takeaways
- The “updates or bust” theme delivers—a whirlwind journey through satisfying (and not) story arcs.
- The hosts offer concrete advice on boundaries, communication, and internet-fueled friendship and partner drama.
- Sometimes the wildest tales aren’t internet fiction—they’re real, unverifiable lives in shambles.
- Not every story gets an update, but the hot takes keep coming!
For more bonus content, recaps, and to share your own stories, the hosts invite listeners to join the Patreon, Instagram, or subreddit communities.
For listeners:
This episode is a must if you love messy life stories, candid reactions, and the comfort of knowing that the wildest posts on the internet have not only updates but also plenty of laughter and insight to go with them.
