Two Hot Takes — Episode 243: "The People Are Ill..?"

Release Date: November 20, 2025
Host: Morgan Absher
Co-host: Lauren

Episode Overview

In this lively and irreverent episode, Morgan and Lauren dive into a wild array of stories showcasing people's questionable (often straight-up “ill”) behavior as culled from Reddit, their own subreddit, and listener write-ins. The “Are the people ill?” theme provides the perfect throughline for tales ranging from workplace weirdness to intolerable houseguests, relationship betrayals, poop in the shower, postpartum marital meltdowns, and a classic "palate cleanser" romance.

Listeners can expect classic Two Hot Takes flavor: laughter, empathetic rants, and the hosts’ reliable knack for mixing deep insights with absolute absurdity.

Key Discussion Points & Highlights

1. [09:37] Vision Board Creepiness:

Story: "My Coworker Secretly Used My Face in Her Vision Board Relationship Collage. And I Don't Know How to Act Normal Now"

• Summary:
  A woman discovers her coworker has cut out her LinkedIn photo and glued it onto a romantic vision board, paired next to a headless hunk.
• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Both Morgan and Lauren are unsettled, but Lauren initially seems more willing to give the coworker the benefit of the doubt (“I’m so flattered…?” [11:57]).
  • Morgan pinpoints the weirdness: “It’s almost like a weird voodoo doll… I think overall it is just odd behavior.” [13:50]
• Advice to OP:
  • Ultimately, set clear boundaries and consider reporting to HR if it feels stalkerish.
  • “At the bare minimum kind of inappropriate for work.” [19:12]
• Notable Quote:
  • Morgan: “You cut out my head, put it on a picture of a woman, and then next to the woman is a man without a head...who’s supposed to be on that man?” [15:40]
• Timestamps:
  • Discussion: [09:37] – [22:13]

2. [22:16] Dodging a Bullet: The Careless Widower

Story: "I Ghosted My Boyfriend After I Found Out Who He Really Was. Nobody Knew Why..."

• Summary:
  OP recognizes, on dates, a man she once saw abandoning his terminally ill wife — she works in healthcare and observed his neglect. Unable to confront him, she ghosts him, and years later still wonders if she should have said more.
• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Lauren: “I wish OP would have said it so that we could have saw his face.” [28:56]
  • Morgan expresses horror at the confirmation of the stereotype about men leaving sick wives: “You didn’t beat the odds. You, like, literally fed into that stat.” [27:12]
• Empathy & Validation:
  • Both affirm OP did nothing wrong, and urge listeners: you’re not obligated to explain yourself to people who treat loved ones so callously.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Lauren: “...when you see these other sides come out, instead of being like, I gotta leave, we think we gotta teach them how to love me correctly. And sometimes, sometimes that can work. But most of the time it’s this never-ending game of making yourself crazy…” [88:50] (see later section, too)
• Timestamps:
  • Discussion: [22:16] – [30:00]

3. [30:00] The Swiftie Roommate from Hell

Story: "My Brother-in-Law Moved In and Hates My Favorite Artist"

• Summary:
  OP and partner, both huge Taylor Swift fans, let partner’s brother move in rent-free after hard times. He repays them by prohibiting Taylor’s music, causing angry scenes over even mild exposure, and reacting with tantrums and thrown utensils.
• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Lauren’s outrage: “He’s out. I would kick him out so fast.” [34:34], “This guy sucks. Ungrateful weirdo.” [33:22]
  • Morgan: “He’s deranged…You know how much you love this artist… and he goes above and beyond to incite this hateful energy…” [39:01]
• Advice:
  • Draw boundaries, consider an end date, and refuse to tiptoe in your own house.
• Update:
  • OP sat him down; he admitted he was out of line; they're trying bi-weekly check-ins and have (for now) returned to peace.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Morgan: “Your brother and his partner are… paying for your weed even. It’s just, that’s an essential item…” [38:18]
  • Lauren: “I just think that this, like, behavior is so despicable...Now it’s personal.” [41:02]
• Timestamps:
  • Story & discussion: [30:00] – [49:13]
  • Update & resolution: [43:35] – [48:38]

4. [55:24] The Scream-Sneezer & The Petty War

Story: "Am I the Asshole for Asking My Husband Not to Sneeze Like That?"

• Summary:
  OP’s husband has started “scream-sneezing” after 17 years of marriage. When she (in pain with a headache) asks him to tone it down, he retaliates by making a snide comment about her period blood and demands she clean it.
• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Morgan: “This is a dude thing with age—my dad has become this person…” [56:11]. She’s “pissed” at how petty the husband gets.
  • Lauren compares it to policing bodily noises (“I yell at my partner for his burping…Is that similar?” [57:14]).
  • General consensus: the issue is less sneezing and more severe communication breakdown, and a worrying tit-for-tat attitude.
• Memorable Moment:
  • Morgan: “If Justin then would have came to me and been like, ‘open your hand’...and he goes, here’s a piece of paper towel for you to go wipe up your period blood, you nasty woman—like, I’m just like, that’s how it feels.” [59:03]
• Timestamps:
  • Discussion: [55:24] – [62:14]

5. [65:35] The "Oopsie Poopsie": Waffle-Stomping Revisited

Story: "Am I Overreacting? She Shit With Me In the Shower"

• Summary:
  After a drunken night, OP’s new girlfriend poops in the shower, pushes it down the drain with her toe, and when confronted later, admits she does it regularly as a sign of “being herself.”
• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Both hosts are grossed out — Morgan: “When you start pooping in that shower, that’s where I draw the line.” [70:55]
  • Hilariously nostalgic reference to earlier Two Hot Takes “waffle-stomping” classic.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Lauren: “Safety hazard. We can. We can’t have any of that.” [68:16]
  • Morgan: “This is the poo that should get pushed down the drain with the toe. Toe the fuck out of this log.” [94:55]
• Timestamps:
  • [65:35] – [75:14]

6. [77:54] The Ultimate “The People Are Ill” Story: Postpartum Husband Meltdown

Story: "Am I the Asshole If I Told My Husband I Wanted a Divorce After He Made Fun of How Many Pants I Tried On?"

• Summary:
  OP, after a traumatic C-section, begs her husband for cultural postpartum support, which he disregards. She is left to recover alone, handle all baby care, and is belittled over her changing body. When she takes longer to get ready, he mocks her trying on pants. The final straw leads her to contemplate divorce.
• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Complete outrage.
  • Morgan: “This is the poo that should get pushed down the drain with the toe…” [94:55]
  • Lauren: “This guy is probably not your guy long-term…” [103:04]
  • Both emphasize the rampant, normalized neglect some women face; urge listeners not to accept bottom-tier treatment.
• Update:
  • Husband does the bare minimum only after prodding; later reverts to gaslighting/dismissiveness.
  • Listeners are encouraged to recognize red flags and seek more from partners.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Morgan (re: postpartum Chinese tradition): “This is what I need. I think every woman needs this. Deserves this.” [93:04]
  • [Direct quote from powerful Reddit comment discussed]: “He gets it. He just doesn’t care.” [86:22+]
• Timestamps:
  • Story: [77:54] – [104:01]
  • Comments & deeper analysis: [84:58] – [104:47]

7. [107:20] Palate Cleanser: “My Dentist Asked Me Out”

Story:
After a run-in at the grocery store, a guy is asked out by his dentist. He’s unsure whether to mix business and pleasure.

• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Lauren: “Find a new dentist, idiot. Harry Potter and love of your life over finding a new dentist?" [109:17]
  • Morgan and Lauren are delighted by the update: they start dating, bond over Harry Potter, and agree she’ll no longer be his dentist before progressing physically to avoid ethical dilemmas.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Top Reddit comment: “It’s easy to find another dentist, but it’s hard to find a good wife.” [111:02]
  • Morgan sums it up: “That was a great palate cleanser.” [112:46]
• Timestamps:
  • [107:20] – [117:57]

Notable Quotes by Timestamp

Morgan: “You cut out my head, put it on a picture of a woman, and then next to the woman is a man without a head whose head is supposed to be on that man.” [15:40]

Lauren: “He’s out. I would kick him out so fast.” [34:34]

Morgan: “He’s deranged…The minute you throw your dinner away because you’re so disgusted you can’t be in the same room as the music…that fork is gonna come flying at your ass. And I hope it shish kebabs you.” [39:39]

Morgan: "This is the poo that should get pushed down the drain with the toe. Toe the fuck out of this log." [94:55]

Referenced Reddit wisdom: "He gets it. He just doesn’t care." [86:22]

Lauren (relationship wisdom): “…you just end up being the worst version of yourself and screaming towards the end of the relationship until you finally are done.” [88:50]

Top Reddit comment: "It’s easy to find another dentist, but it’s hard to find a good wife." [111:02]

Episode Structure & Flow

• Opening Banter & Theme Setup: [00:01] – [09:37]
• Story 1: Vision Board Coworker [09:37] – [22:13]
• Story 2: The Careless Widower [22:16] – [30:00]
• Story 3: Swiftie Roommate from Hell (+ update) [30:00] – [49:13]
• Physical & Emotional Regulation Tangent (“vagus nerve,” “doorway magic”): [08:15] – [09:19]
• Misc. Poop/Prank Anecdotes: [04:11] – [09:19]
• Story 4: Scream-Sneezer Husband [55:24] – [62:14]
• Story 5: Shower Pooper (Waffle Stomp Redux) [65:35] – [75:14]
• Story 6: Postpartum Husband Horror (+ edits & updates) [77:54] – [104:47]
• Palate Cleanser Romance: The Dentist [107:20] – [117:57]
• Harry Potter Sidebar & Spoiler Warning [115:57] – [119:44]
• Closing Community Notes [119:44] – [121:09]

Tone & Atmosphere

• Playful, self-deprecating, supportive: Morgan and Lauren alternate between cackling laughter (over the ridiculous) and sincere empathy (for story submitters and people dealing with serious relationship issues).
• Unfiltered & irreverent: Not skirting around bodily function stories or calling out men behaving badly.
• Encouraging & validating: Strong stance on boundaries, self-respect, and the need to ask for more in relationships.

Takeaways

• The world’s full of “ill” people—but you don’t have to let them steamroll your life, happiness, or hygiene standards.
• From red flags to roommates outstaying welcomes to the need for partners to truly step up: don’t accept less than you deserve.
• Sometimes, you simply need a palate cleanser in the form of a hot dentist and a good Harry Potter marathon.

Engage:

• Drop your "midwest words" for Morgan on IG/YouTube!
• Need a Christmas tree in LA? Comment for Morgan to send you one via Uber.

Next Episode Teasers:

• Next week: Epic pranks and more tales of “the ill.”
• Patreon: A heavy post about a mother visiting her son in prison, with more intimate conversation.

Further Reading:

• (Refer to 2xChromosomes Reddit post [“He knows. He doesn't care.”] for deeper commentary on gendered empathy gaps.) [Referenced at 86:22]

End of summary. If you enjoyed this, check out @TwoHotTakes for more wild rides or contribute your own story for future hot takes!