244: Ugly Hearts.. Ft. Gigi Gorgeous

Summary

Podcast Summary: Two Hot Takes – “Ugly Hearts…” Ft. Gigi Gorgeous (Ep. 244)

Release Date: November 27, 2025
Host: Morgan Absher
Guest: Gigi Gorgeous

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Main Theme

The episode centers on “Ugly Hearts”—people demonstrating hurtful, toxic, or disrespectful behaviors, especially in relationships. Morgan and Gigi dive into real-life Reddit stories and listener write-ins, discussing situations where individuals are dealing with manipulative partners, cruel family members, boundary issues, and other “ugly heart” moments. The tone is candid, irreverent, and supportive—a safe space for venting and hot takes.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introduction & Gigi Gorgeous’ Background

• [01:07] Morgan and Gigi bond over their similar teenage antics (e.g., stealing from malls), cultural snack preferences (ketchup chips!), and Minnesota/Canada lore.
• Gigi shares her creative background, growing up in a restrictive, Catholic environment in Toronto and eventually moving to LA for self-expression.

“I just feel like I was made for something else...I still love Canada obviously, but had to travel to Los Angeles for a little bit more.”
— Gigi, [03:55]

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2. Ugly Hearts: Relationship Stories from Reddit

a) “Boyfriend Posts Photo of Female Friend (Sarah) Sitting in His Lap”

• [08:00]
• OP (22F) discovers her boyfriend (28M) took a sexually suggestive photo with his friend Sarah (27F) at a party.
• Sarah has a history of making condescending remarks, and the boyfriend gaslights OP when confronted.
• Discussion of male-female friendships and emotional boundaries.
• Both hosts agree the boyfriend and Sarah’s actions are inappropriate and disrespectful.

“I don’t even do that with my husband in pictures...In a group photo, I’m gonna sit there and straddle him?”
— Morgan, [11:22]

“He’s a loser.”
— Gigi, [11:50]

• Resolution: A month later, OP finds out the boyfriend and Sarah are dating. She is validated in breaking up.

“Lesson learned. Trust your gut and choose a partner who respects you...being single is 100 times better than being called crazy for calling out inappropriate behavior.”
— Reddit OP, [16:44]

Insight: Both hosts stress how important it is to trust your gut and not excuse disrespectful patterns.

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b) “Am I the Asshole for Going Home After My Husband Dangled Me Over a Parking Garage Edge as a Prank?”

• [19:49]
• Husband “jokes” by lifting wife over a parking garage edge, terrifying her.
• He refuses to see her perspective, accuses her of overreacting, and belittles her trauma.
• The hosts are appalled and label the behavior as abusive and dangerous.

“That’s not a joke...to like, off a ledge is a lot.”
— Gigi, [23:50]

“If someone dangled me over the edge...I would just splat real fast.”
— Morgan, [23:14]

• OP shares that her husband often “pranks” her with jump scares—behaviors that have escalated.

Insight:

• The pranks are not funny; they are about power and boundary testing.
• Gigi calls for divorce and even suggests police involvement for safety.

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c) “Am I the Asshole for Blowing Up at My Mother-in-Law at a Family Dinner?”

• [32:35]
• OP’s mother-in-law makes a cruel toast at a pregnancy dinner, saying she’ll be the “only grandma”—since OP’s own mother recently passed.
• OP stands up for herself, storms out, and is instantly gaslit by her husband and mother-in-law for being “dramatic.”
• Morgan and Gigi praise OP for her courage and slam the husband for not taking his wife’s side.

“I think I’m so proud of you for even standing up in that moment...she needed to hear that in that moment.”
— Gigi, [33:29]

• Update: Husband still does not support her. MIL sends a text saying OP’s grief is a burden and she should “move on.”
• OP chooses to stay with her sister, questions her marriage, and plans to prioritize her and her baby’s mental health.

“I need an environment where I feel respected and supported, and I don’t feel that way right now. I told my husband that if he wants me back, he needs to show me he can stand up for me. I’m putting myself and my baby first.”
— Reddit OP, [40:32]

Insight:

• Gigi and Morgan discuss boundaries, husband’s “mama’s boy” syndrome, and the importance of an ally in your partner.

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d) “Am I the Asshole for Not Complimenting My Wife So She Won’t Become Vain?”

• [46:42]
• Husband refuses to compliment wife, who has recently regained her sense of self and confidence post-motherhood, because “the world already does that.”
• He feels threatened by her improving looks and lifestyle.
• Both hosts are livid, label the husband deeply insecure, controlling, and toxic.

“You’re a pussy, you’re a bitch...She gave him three kids. She’s hot as hell now. Step up.”
— Gigi, [48:24]

“Your wife is beautiful and you thought she was great even without all the makeup and the new style and the new interests—now that she has all of those things...do you take any interest in her new interest?”
— Reddit comment, [51:59]

Insight:

• Controlling or withholding affection is a red flag for emotional abuse.

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e) “Am I the Asshole for Walking Out of My Boyfriend’s Birthday After His Dad’s Comment About My Age?”

• [60:03]
• OP (36F) meets boyfriend’s family for the first time; his dad says she has “10 years of sex kitten left in you.”
• Boyfriend laughs with his dad and tells OP not to be so dramatic when she leaves.
• Morgan and Gigi find the comment gross, sexist, and demeaning.

“His dad called you a sex kitten...an aging sex kitten. I’m about to actually throw up.”
— Morgan, [63:41], [63:53]

Insight:

• The family lacks respect, the boyfriend minimizes OP’s boundaries, and listeners are warned that “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”

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f) “Am I Overreacting for Telling My BF I Won’t Be His Free Photographer Anymore—Sent Him a Rate Sheet”

• [70:05]
• OP’s boyfriend expects her to be his full-time unpaid content creator for his fitness page, escalating from occasional help to a full on “job,” even accepting “payment” on her behalf in pre-workout tubs.
• She draws a boundary with a rate sheet; he frames her limits as “unsupportive.”
• Hosts support OP’s move and call out the boyfriend’s exploitation.

“He’s abusive. And her—even getting to the point of doing a spreadsheet of costs is a lot...She should have been like, ‘I'm not doing this for you anymore.’”
— Gigi, [73:25]

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g) “Am I the Asshole for Telling My Husband He Can't Have His Ex at Our Baby Shower?”

• [77:36]
• Husband insists his ex, who is part of their friend group, should attend their baby shower. OP is uncomfortable. He calls her insecure and “territorial.”
• Morgan and Gigi think the husband’s insistence is suspicious and disrespectful.

“I’d ask him why her presence means more to him than your comfort.”
— Reddit comment, [79:05]

• Discussion on exes in friend groups, emotional boundaries, and the right to “just say no” to discomfort in intimate moments.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [12:20] Gigi: “They need to both be actually hung at the stake.” (on the disrespectful boyfriend and his friend)
• [18:34] Gigi: “Your gut is like, ‘maybe this person isn't in love with me. Maybe they are seeing somebody else.’...if it’s your true gut, go with that. Listen to her.”
• [28:10] Gigi: “He hates women. He probably hates you. You need to divorce him.” (on the “prank” husband)
• [33:53] Morgan: “Unstoppable and enabled. Now your husband, who should have your back, is like ‘oh, well, you... you're overreacting.’”
• [46:52] Gigi: “She outgrew you, clearly. She is...that’s life. You grow constantly with a partner. Why are you not trying to grow?”
• [63:39] Morgan: “Not the asshole. His dad called you a sex kitten.”
• [75:49] Gigi: “Not to be crazy, but know your worth. You are this man's career. You're the whole reason he has content!”
• [79:05] Reddit top comment: “Why does her presence mean more to him than your comfort?”

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• [01:07] — Introduction, growing up, and snack lore
• [03:16] — Gigi’s creative background/journey
• [08:00] — Story 1: Boyfriend’s inappropriate friend photo
• [16:10] — Story 1 update (they’re dating now)
• [19:49] — Story 2: The “prank” husband and trauma
• [32:35] — Story 3: Cruel mother-in-law toast
• [40:32] — Story 3 update: Husband fails to back OP
• [46:42] — Story 4: Husband won’t compliment wife
• [60:03] — Story 5: Dad’s creepy sex kitten comment
• [70:05] — Story 6: The “camera girl” content labor dispute
• [77:36] — Story 7: Husband pushes for ex to be at baby shower
• [85:28] — Episode wrap; lessons & final thoughts

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Conclusion & Takeaways

• Theme: Many stories centered on emotionally neglectful, selfish, or outright cruel partners/family—with the “ugly heart” behavior always coming from a place of ego, insecurity, or entitlement.
• Hosts’ Tone: Fiercely pro-boundaries, validating to letter writers, and quick to point out red flags, with abundant humor and “hot takes.”
• Favorite Advice: Trust your gut, don’t excuse disrespect for “personality,” and expect—and offer—support and kindness in relationships.
• Major “ugly heart” red flags discussed: gaslighting, boundary violations, emotional weaponization, unrepentant cruelty, and lack of accountability.

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For Listeners Who Haven’t Tuned In:

You’ll enjoy raw, honest discussion about relationship dilemmas and problematic personalities—with plenty of humor and supportive “you deserve better!” energy. Whether you’re here for the drama or looking for clarity on sticky situations, the episode delivers both catharsis and community.

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For more stories and updates, check out the Two Hot Takes Instagram, Patreon, or YouTube channel. Gigi Gorgeous can be found across all socials and on her own podcast/vlog.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Thank you for having me.

[A]

I'm so excited. You are just like such a Legend. Started on YouTube so early. I watched one of your videos today, one of your recent vlogs, and you're like, you were just getting back and connected with your people, but you're like, you guys have been with me since I was stealing makeup at the mall, and I was like, girl, same.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

That was me.

[B]

Did you really?

[A]

Yeah. I had a problem. It was just so. It was a sport for me and my friends.

[B]

Was your drug of choice, Drugstore Mac?

[A]

No, honestly, Mac lipstick. Yes. But I went for, like, big ticket items. Like, I did, like, DVDs, jeans, fur coats. Like the fur coat.

[B]

How do you still feel a fur coat?

[A]

I don't know. I was really good. Literally how I was really good. But people get mad when I talk about it. They're like, she does not care. That's so bad. I'm like, I was 15. Okay. 14. 15.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A wee baby.

[B]

We would have been criminals.

[A]

Besties.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, Totally. All of that. And a bag of chips.

[A]

Exactly. Bag of chips. Are you into the ketchup chips because you're Canadian?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, of course I am.

[A]

Are you really?

[B]

Yeah. Are you not?

[A]

No.

[B]

Who isn't into ketchup chips?

[A]

I'LL get behind poutine, duh. But the ketchup chips are like, they're too unique for me.

[B]

Oh, my God, stop.

[A]

Too unique for me.

[B]

You don't like the taste?

[A]

They just are so sour.

[B]

I love them.

[A]

I'll give it another go, just for you.

[B]

Yeah, I need to get you some.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Whenever my sister comes back, she's like, oh my God, here are some ketchup chips. And I'm like, wait, I miss the flavor. Like, it's so real.

[A]

Oh my God. Nope, can't do it. Oh, I can't do it.

[B]

Okay, let us know down in the comments.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Ketchup chips or no is team ketchup.

[A]

What is some lore though, for my listeners that have not, you know, met you yet? What is your background? What's Gigi's story?

[B]

Well, I mean, I went to like an all, you know, uniform, Catholic high school, very boring, not very, you know, self expressive. And I, you know, Toronto, Canada, and I just saw the lights of LA and just like all the things. I was very creative. Literally the only before we started recording, I don't know if we were. But the only thing, thing that I ever really like, excelled in was like art class and like, you know, creativeness. Yeah, like math, science, all that stuff.

[A]

I was like, it's tough for me.

[B]

Kill me.

[A]

No, I feel the same way.

[B]

Yeah. So I just feel like I was made for something else. And I, I still love Canada, obviously, but had to travel to Los Angeles for a little bit more.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, I feel. Yeah, I moved from Minnesota, which is basically Canada. It's like, we want Canada to adopt us. A lot of the times if you.

[B]

Ask Minnesotans, isn't Minnesota big for like serial killers?

[A]

I hope not.

[B]

Isn't it though?

[A]

I don't think so.

[B]

You don't know?

[A]

No.

[B]

Oh, maybe. I'm thinking of another state.

[A]

Wisconsin.

[B]

Maybe Wisconsin.

[A]

I feel like Wisconsin's a big one. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, that's like the, the good looking one.

[A]

Bundy. Yeah, I see. I literally have a true crime podcast too. And I'm like, why don't I know this?

[B]

Yeah. Wait, what?

[A]

Like, what's happening? Okay, Wisconsin is higher. Two victims for every 100K.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Louisiana's the worst.

[B]

Really?

[A]

7.5 victims for every 100,000 people. And Alaska, 8.6.

[B]

What about Toronto?

[A]

There's only the United States. Oh, okay, let's see.

[B]

Cause I don't really know. Maybe I could be the first. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

[A]

No, Toronto is not generally considered.

[B]

Yeah. It's a pretty good. Yeah, Canada's pretty good.

[A]

London, Ontario was once infamously known as having the highest concentration of serial killers in the world between 1959 and 1984.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

So watch out.

[B]

Okay. I've been there.

[A]

Have you really?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

You're like, oh, that fits.

[B]

I dove there. Yeah.

[A]

Okay, well, our theme today, serial killers definitely have this. We're gonna determine if some of the people in these stories have this, but the theme is ugly hearts. These people are just like not being kind, being deceptive, not being a good partner. Not something's off and it's just kind of giving. Ugly.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Not gorgeous.

[B]

Not gorgeous.

[A]

Not gorgeous. And as you know, Gigi, gorgeous. You should know ugly.

[B]

Yes, yes, definitely do.

[A]

Okay, let's dive in.

[B]

Okay. I'm excited. I don't really know what we're doing, but I'm here, I'm here. I'm here to play.

[A]

You're buckled in. You're ready. This episode of two Hot Takes is presented by Ollie. Women always come first with Ollie. That's why they made their Love and Libido a supplement that helps take the pressure off so you can actually enjoy yourself and sex again. Be a little self serving and get Love and Libido at a retailer near you [e-mail] so you can get yours. That's O L L Y.com promo code [e-mail] now through November 30th. Okay, this first story, this is coming from the relationships subreddit. So this is a community on Reddit that's all about, like helping people in their relationships. It helps them vent or ask for advice. So this is titled My 22 Female Boyfriend, 28 Male. Posted a photo of a friend, 27 female, sitting in his lap. Okay, so some background. Matt and I have been dating unofficially for nine months and officially for four months. We kept things casual at first since we were both close to graduating from our respective programs and weren't sure where we would end up. But once we were both settled in the same city, we made things official. During this casual dating phase, I met a few of his friends. One in particular, Sarah, often went out of her way to clarify that we were not official or exclusive.

[B]

Gag.

[A]

She also made catty comments about my profession. I love what I do, but it's certainly not as prestigious as my boyfriend's and his friend's job. My school, again, not nearly as prestigious. My age, I'm five years younger than them and has just generally made condescending comments to me and Rudely interrupted me. I never made a big deal out of it because Matt's other friends are really friendly to me and I'm generally an easygoing person. All of Matt's friends, including Sarah, recently went to a party. I was invited, but I had other plans so I didn't go. A few days later on Facebook, someone posted a photo of all of the friends together at this party. Everyone is posed normally except Matt and Sarah. He's sitting down and she has her arms and legs wrapped around him and is arching her back and kind of flipping her hair back.

[B]

Gag, gag, gag, gag.

[A]

It clearly comes across as sexual.

[B]

Uh huh.

[A]

Because several people commented on the post asking what was going on or making jokes about it. I texted Matt and asked why he thought it was a good idea to take a photo of his friend practically mounting him. And he said, quote, are you on something that's just a photo of friends? There's nothing wrong with it. I tried explaining to him that I found it disrespectful, but he hasn't budged. Am I overreacting here? What should I do?

[B]

Do you want to go?

[A]

You got it.

[B]

Okay. You know what? I think that there's this like age old and old tale as old as time. Can a female and a male be friends without anything else going on? And I want to know your take on this before we really deep dive on this.

[A]

I feel like it's very difficult and I feel like oftentimes women and men have two very different intentions when starting the friendship. I think for women it can be very platonic. I think a lot of times for guys, it oftentimes starts as attraction or trying to date that person, but then they get friend zoned and other. Obviously there's, you know, exceptions to every rule or whatever, but I think that's generally how it goes. So if you start on that foundation, I think it's, you know, if the line could be crossed, he might cross it.

[B]

Yes. I think that the guy is always waiting.

[A]

There's studies on this. I mean, there are studies on this that I forget what exactly it is. But they pooled a hundred guys, a hundred women that were friends and like the stats of the guys that would try and were waiting. It was high.

[B]

Yeah. It's like it has to be giving the 80%.

[A]

I just look it up. I'll look it up.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because I'm like, it is, it was high.

[B]

I think the girl's trying it. The arching the back and the waving of the hair and everything.

[A]

I'm like, girl, her legs are wrapped around him.

[B]

That's a lot like that. Proof is in the pudding.

[A]

I don't even do that with my husband in pictures. Like, I would.

[B]

Did you ever.

[A]

Or, like, no.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

So, like, in a group photo, I'm gonna sit there and straddle him and.

[B]

She'S, like, trying to be bad and.

[A]

He'S dating some, like, I hate her girl. Why? Why are you doing us dirty like this? Why are you being a pick me?

[B]

I think I hate her.

[A]

It's definitely giving pick me. No, no, no, no, no.

[B]

I don't like that guy either.

[A]

No, he's a loser.

[B]

No, exactly.

[A]

Literally trying to be like, are you on something?

[B]

Mm.

[A]

That's a normal photo. Friends lose her with each other. It's normal.

[B]

Kill her. Kill him. Let's move on.

[A]

So one of the top comments on the post is, ah, yes, the classic deflect then blame you move. That, plus the fact that he never gently or otherwise said anything to her about how she treats you in general, says to me that he likes her attention and does not want to give it up.

[B]

Absolutely. He loves it. Are you joking me? Of course. Yes.

[A]

Yeah. No, that comment on, I mean, classic.

[B]

Like, stupid guy, like, just, you know, takes anything that he's given.

[A]

Just go in on it.

[B]

They need to both be actually hung at the stake.

[A]

Why aren't they just dating?

[B]

I don't know. Maybe it's like, more naughty fun for them. Yeah, more fun. I don't know. Some people get off on that, you know.

[A]

No, I could see it. It's like, you want what you can have, but then once you could have it, you don't want it.

[B]

He's like, oh, actually, there's something shinier in the corner right behind you that I want.

[A]

Literally. So OP does respond to a thread and goes, from what I know of Sarah's personality, she's the type of person who will say or do outrageous things for attention, and her friends will just laugh and say, that's Sarah for you. So when she says insulting things to me, there will usually be a moment of everyone sharply inhaling, followed by laughter and, oh, my God, Sarah, you can't say things like that. When I've brought up that I don't like being the subject of her wit. Matt, my boyfriend, basically had the same reaction of, that's just how she is.

[B]

I mean, I've made excuses for friends, siblings, people in general. I think it's really tough because you want to make excuses and you feel like you have to. But at the end of the day. I feel like everyone kind of knows what's going on.

[A]

I think you can kind of see through this.

[B]

You know what I mean? Have you ever, like, made excuses where you feel even dumb saying it as you're saying it?

[A]

Yeah, I. I dated someone in Canada for almost three years, and I was in college in Minnesota, and we were doing long distance, and, like, every weekend he would disappear, and I'm like, what's going on? Like, where were you this week? What's going on? And he's like, oh, I didn't have service. I didn't have service.

[B]

Where do you say he was?

[A]

Well, he was, like, outside of Edmonton. In Lloydminster. Like, it is middle of nowhere.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah, but I'm like, you still, like, your phone works and it's not like you're off the grid. Like, you have WI fi too, bitch. Right, but in my dumb self.

[B]

If you wanted to, you would.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Meanwhile, like, we ended up breaking up, and he did have another girlfriend up there, so, you know. But at the time, you're like, oh, my God. Yeah, you don't have service. Right, Duh. We convince ourselves.

[B]

Clear as day.

[A]

Just.

[B]

Yeah, it's silly. Like, even, like, if you have, like, you know, like a sloppy drunk friend or best friend or sister or whatever, you're always like, oh, no, no, that's, like, just her. Like, it's so. She's so fun. Like, that's just her.

[A]

She's just outrageous.

[B]

Yeah, she's crazy.

[A]

Crazy. She's so crazy.

[B]

Love her, though. You'll love her. That's just her.

[A]

Yeah, it's like.

[B]

But you know, when you're saying it, it's like, no.

[A]

And it's like, I. Like, I have one of my best friends. Her name's Alexis, and she's. She's just. She talks loud, but she's so fun. And, like, Alexis would never be cruel. Like, she would despise cruelness like this. And so it's like, there's a difference between just being, like, a goofy or sillier person and being out there or louder or whatever, versus, like, oh, no, you're just kind of a. You're an.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, you're just not nice.

[B]

That's what I can't stand for. I feel like that's the. The excuse that I wouldn't fight for meanness or bitchiness or passive aggressiveness. I just can't with any of that.

[A]

Why the cruelness?

[B]

But if they're being, like, zany or wacky, I'm like, I'll always make an excuse for that because I'm like, that's just them.

[A]

That's fun. Yeah, that's fun, though. Like, that's the difference.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So we do get an update on this. Okay, so sometimes on these posts, we get updates. We get resolutions.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

So this is coming a month and a half later. So after reading the responses here, I felt like I was being pretty rational about my concerns. I confronted my boyfriend, and not only did he double down on the insistence that he did nothing wrong, but he also said some pretty nasty things. This brought up other issues we've had, and I decided to end things now. Almost a month later, on social media, I see that he and Sarah are dating.

[B]

Oh, my God. Clear as day, my love. Shameless.

[A]

What the fuck? So much for that being a normal picture of platonic friends to take, right? Lesson learned. Trust your gut and choose a partner who respects you. I never felt secure in that relationship, but I know one day I'll find someone who cares about me and isn't Quasi cheating with his friend. Being single is 100 times better than being called crazy for calling out inappropriate behavior.

[B]

Mm. Mm. Rightfully so. What's quasi? Would you say quasi?

[A]

Quasi.

[B]

Quasi. Like Quasimodo?

[A]

I don't know. That's all I'm saying.

[B]

Like hunchback behavior.

[A]

It's a pretty big word for me. It means in some sense resembling or not completely, but almost.

[B]

Mm. Like semi. Yeah, Mid.

[A]

Yeah, I'm trying to find, like, a. A sentence that, like, would help provide context for us. Yeah, it's attached to another word to indicate that something is not fully but has some sort of features.

[B]

Right.

[A]

So it's like they were quasi dating. Like they weren't actually dating.

[B]

It's not fact. It's like 0.5 fact.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You kind of see it, but it's not official.

[B]

Well, I feel like when your gut is telling you something, I really, really, truly believe that you should really always listen to that voice. There's something that I feel like I've learned that. And tell me if you feel the same way. So there's like the inner saboteur voice that's telling you, like, you wanna act in a movie. You can't act in a movie. There's no way you are talented enough. They're not gonna want you, whatever. Or like, maybe acting in a movie is not right for you. That's like your gut. The hateful speech is like your inner saboteur.

[A]

I love that. Like, it's imposter syndro syndrome. But the way you say it sounds better. Inner saboteur.

[B]

Yeah, it's just like, oh, my God, shut up. Shut up. Like, I got this. Yeah, but also, like, your gut is like, maybe this person isn't in love with me. Maybe they are seeing somebody else. You know what I mean? Like, that's a gut. An inner saboteur is like something else. So if it's like your true gut, like, go with that. Listen to her.

[A]

No, trust your gut for sure. Especially, like, if you don't trust your partner and, like, you're getting weird vibes and your radar is kind of going off like something's up here. You're probably right. Like, we have those instincts for a reason.

[B]

Right. And you spend so much time with your partner, like, you know, the way they move. Like, if something is weird, it's probably weird.

[A]

Probably weird.

[B]

You know what I mean? Like, you're not making it up unless you're, like, on, like, narcotics or something. I don't know.

[A]

Having a bad day. Having a bad.

[B]

Having a bad day.

[A]

This next one, I think, could fit into this whole vibe of, like, something's up. But, like, what is up? Like, is it gut or is it inner saboteur? Okay, okay, this is a bit scary, you guys. I don't know what trigger warning to add. Maybe it needs one. Maybe I'll patch it in.

[B]

Murder.

[A]

You might be a little psychic over there.

[B]

Really?

[A]

This is titled Am I the Asshole for Going Home? After my husband dangled me over the parking garage edge as a prank, and I thought he was killing me.

[B]

What?

[A]

I know you joked murder.

[B]

Okay, wait, what? Literally? What?

[A]

Hi, Reddit. This happened a couple of days ago. I went out with my husband to eat at a place nearby that we had booked for that time, and he wanted to go for a while. He'd been really looking forward to it, and so I drove him there and we parked on the top floor of the parking garage nearby. We got out of the car and started walking down the stairs, which were right on the edge of the parking garage. He started talking about how high up we were and jokingly asked if I thought I could survive if I jumped down from there, and obviously I wouldn't have.

[B]

Hey.

[A]

As we were turning down the stairs and we were right next to the edge, we which had a small railing. Before a straight drop, he shouted out, all caps, say goodbye, and suddenly grabbed me and picked me up and brought me over the edge and dangled me there. And I fucking screamed out. I was so scared. I thought he was going to kill me. And he held me over the edge for a second and then pulled me back and set me down. And I was in shock. And he was laughing like it was the funniest thing ever. And I was still processing what he had just done to me. I was legitimately shaking and lost my appetite and mood to be out. And I just decided I wanted to go home. And I told him, I'm going home. And he said it was just a joke and that he was just trying to have fun. I told him he can come home with me now or he can take the bus, but I'm driving home right now. He said I ruined the date because he'd really been wanting to eat there and huffed on the way back. And I was still shocked because I was literally hanging over the edge. And I got home and I was just thinking about it, and I started crying, and he didn't even come over and console me. He apologized later, but it was like, sorry you got scared instead of sorry for doing something I shouldn't have. And now my mood was just ruined for the rest of the day. So, Reddit, am I the asshole for going home ruined for the rest of.

[B]

The day is so nice. I would, I, you know what I would do?

[A]

Hit him with the car as you get in and drive home.

[B]

Absolutely. Be like, I was kidding. It was a prank. I was joking. Oh, my God.

[A]

Wasn't that funny?

[B]

No, no, no. Payback. I mean, I'm a revenge bitch. Like, I would see red.

[A]

How do you revenge this? Like, what, do you dangle him over something?

[B]

Like, I don't know.

[A]

I would, like, take a time out.

[B]

Axe and, like, chop his foot off and be like, kidding. Like, how dare. I just don't see where this is, like, rational in any way.

[A]

No. How is this a joke? Dangling someone over the side Also, how.

[B]

Big is he and how small are you? How is he dangling you off and then taking you back?

[A]

Also, like, it.

[B]

Like, you must be really little.

[A]

I just like the logistics. Yeah, I'm, like, very confused on the logistics.

[B]

Same.

[A]

I would definitely. If someone dangled me over the edge, like, I would get dropped. Like, I would just splat real fast. But.

[B]

Right. Because that's, like, actually attempted murder. Like, it's like you're trying to kill me. That's not a joke.

[A]

No. And like, here's the thing. Like, when someone's panicked, you can't predict how they're gonna respond. If she would have, like, started wriggling.

[B]

About, scratched his eyes out.

[A]

What if he accidentally dropped her? Like, yeah, okay. Maybe it's a joke to you, but accidents still happen. What if you literally drop me, right?

[B]

And like, is that funny? Like a fake. You know how, like, you know, brothers will, like, come up to you and, like, fake punch you and stuff like that. Like, that's cute. But, like, to like, off a ledge is a lot allege.

[A]

Yeah, like this.

[B]

He's actually an alleged ledge.

[A]

He's giving. Psychopath.

[B]

No, it's weird. Like, I would honestly feel weird sleeping beside that person at night.

[A]

I wouldn't be able to.

[B]

No, me neither.

[A]

I would not be able to trust lost. I'm going to this room and I'm locking the door.

[B]

Yeah, 100%. You know what, though? Good for her for saying, you know, come with me or I'm driving home. Is that what she said? Yeah, like, good for her.

[A]

You can either come with me now or take the bus.

[B]

Exactly. Love that for her.

[A]

Honestly, I love it. I love that she was like, I'm not. I'm not going to even fake this dinner, we're done. But I almost wish she would have been like, you're taking the bus home to think about what you did by.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Fudge you.

[B]

What's the next thing going to be, though? Pushing her in front of a train? Being like, kidding. Like, girl, you're living with a psychopath.

[A]

I know. So the top comment clearly says, like, not the asshole. Like, this is not on you. They ask, how long have you been married? Is he often someone who finds pranks hysterical? Do you have a very large life insurance? I'm just trying to understand what made him think this was okay.

[B]

That's actually a good question.

[A]

I. I didn't even. Like, I would never think of that.

[B]

Me neither.

[A]

Oh, my gosh.

[B]

You know when you meet someone, though, and you look in their eyes and you could tell, like, the person that they are, though. I would love to see this guy.

[A]

What he looks like in this room.

[B]

With us right now.

[A]

Who are you envisioning?

[B]

Fucking, like, Ed Gein?

[A]

I need to watch the new show. Like, I've heard Monsters is really good.

[B]

You haven't watched it?

[A]

No.

[B]

Oh, my God. That's so up your alley.

[A]

I know. I, like, have a hard time with scary stuff, though, which is weird because I can do true crime.

[B]

What?

[A]

It's the whole thing, Gigi. I don't know.

[B]

Okay, okay, okay, okay. I respect it. Don't judge. But that's crazy. You would love it.

[A]

Okay. I think it's gonna go on my list. That and have you seen Perfect Neighbor yet? I Haven't I've heard that one is like.

[B]

I've seen so much about it though that I feel like I have.

[A]

You've basically watched it. Yeah. Okay. Okay.

[B]

Have you?

[A]

I need two. Oh yeah, it's on my list. But I've heard it's just like. Cuz it's all through body cam footage and it's just like, what the fuck? So OP does respond to that comment. We've been married for a couple of years and we'd had been dating for some time before that. I met him at church and we got married after I got pregnant. And we do have life insurance. And I was thinking I was going to die and my baby was not going to have a mother. And I screamed out and I didn't think it was a prank in the moment. I was so scared and shocked for so long after too. He has scared me before by shocking me. Like when I walked through the door and he came out and yelled. Or when he snuck up behind me and shook me once when he came home from work early and I was cooking. Or when he once pretended he fell off a ladder and I came running out after hearing a loud noise and him groaning. But this time I literally thought I was going to die. I cried when I got home. I never cried from him shocking me before.

[B]

Okay. Pranks are funny. You know, social media and all of that stuff is really funny. We see like couple pranks, couple social media accounts and all that. I can't even handle when like a friend is getting ready down the hall and doesn't like announce themselves before because I'm like, like if the water is on, I'm listening to a podcast, whatever. Like I get freaked out.

[A]

I'm a jump scare person.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't like being like shocked like that. No.

[B]

Like announce yourself.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So if I was in like a relationship with somebody and I thought, oh my God, they've done this to me before. They're hiding behind a door. Like my. I probably have a heart attack. I can't handle that.

[A]

No, I can't either. And it's just like I. I don't know what his intention here is. And it feels like they're definitely escalating in terms of what he's doing. So I really feel like he's. He's testing your boundaries to see what he can get away with.

[B]

I think he also seems a little bit misogynistic. He thinks women. He hates women. He probably hates you and he just wants to control you. I mean, but you don't play Ball like that. Like, you don't. Yeah. Like you don't prank him back, but he knows that he, like, got you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know he hates women. He hates you. You need to divorce him.

[A]

I was going to say it's time to pull out the D word.

[B]

It's done. It's done. Done. Divorce.

[A]

Divorce.

[B]

Delaware.

[A]

Oh, my God. Yeah.

[B]

Good luck, girl. Because you know what? It seems like it's escalating.

[A]

Like it is. And you've got a baby involved. Like, at this point, you really need to, like, look out for yourself and your little one.

[B]

He needs Jesus.

[A]

He was already going to church, so I don't think that's it, but maybe.

[B]

He really needs Jesus.

[A]

I think he needs an exorcism or.

[B]

To come out as gay, who he truly is.

[A]

Call up a priest. There's just like, one other recommendation. People are like, please file a police report. Like, please have this on record, because this is a spoiler.

[B]

Well, this is the record.

[A]

If she doesn't, that's insane. But we don't have an update. She never came out and posted again.

[B]

She has to get out of there.

[A]

I know this is seven months old now, so hopefully, you know, she sees this, hears this, and gets an update to us. Like, hey, I did get divorced. Yeah, life is good.

[B]

I'm alive.

[A]

I got soul custody. We're good. We're good here.

[B]

Sad that there's a kid. He seems nuts.

[A]

I know. I just. I can't even imagine.

[B]

Me neither.

[A]

I cannot. But moving along to this next one.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

This episode is brought to you by Redken Blondies, Color Treated hair or my heat users. You all know how hard it is to keep your hair feeling and looking healthy. And you shouldn't have to compromise. That is where Redken comes in. It's going to help you smooth and strengthen those locks of yours with their Redken abc. That's Redken acidic bonding concentrate. Leave in treatment. The longer you leave it in, the better it feels. And it provides hair heat protection up to 450 degrees Fahrenheit with continued use. So leave it in and repair those bonds with Redken ABC. Shop Redken ABC. Leave in treatment@ Ulta.com okay, story number three for us here it is coming from Am I the asshole? Titled Am I the asshole for blowing up at my mother in law at a family dinner. Love this one throwaway account. Since my husband is an active Reddit user, I, 23 female, have been married to my husband, 24 male, for three years. We were high school sweethearts and have Been best friends since elementary school. He's still my best friend to this day. I've never had a great relationship with his mom. She's difficult to talk to and our conversations are usually very shallow. Gossiping about neighbors, complaining about landscapers, et cetera. Almost a year ago, my mom passed away, which still feels surreal to write. She truly was my soulmate and I'm incredibly grateful to have had her in my life for 23 years. I miss her more than words can describe. My husband's family really stepped up during that time, supporting us financially with funeral costs and managing affairs when I was deep in grief. I'm genuinely grateful for their help. Fast forward to now we're expecting our first baby. As excited as I am, I'm also deeply saddened that my mom won't be here to guide me through this. We always talked about what my kids would call her. We had settled on Grams. Now to the incident. We were celebrating our pregnancy dinner at my in law's house and my mother in law asked to make a toast. She laughed and said, quote, I'm so grateful to celebrate a new addition to our family. We can't wait to meet little Veronica, which is her name. She went on to talk about her own pregnancy and what I should expect, mentioning that my husband had an abnormally big head when he was born. Then she said, quote, I look forward to being the favorite grandma to Veronica, since of course I'll be the only grandma. The room went silent. I started to cry. I stood up and I told her how incredibly insensitive it was to say that and that my mom would always be a grandmother whether she's here or not. She responded by saying I was overreacting and that it's just a joke. I told her to go to hell and left immediately. My husband later called me saying he spoke to his mom who was in tears because she was embarrassed.

[B]

Oh God.

[A]

She asked him to apologize on her behalf and he told me I should have came back instead of telling her to go to hell and storming off. I'm currently staying with my sister and I haven't stopped crying since. She supports me 100%, but I really want to know, am I the asshole number one?

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don't think for one second that you are even to question if you are the asshole is insane to me. I think that this woman is absolutely bonkers, nuts, outta control. And I mean, I'd like to first of all say, I think I'm so proud of you for Even standing up in that moment. Because as a people pleaser, I would've just like, held ont really did it with her chest and said that. And, like, I'm very proud of you. Yeah, like, good for you. Cause she needed to hear that in that moment. And obviously, she has no boundaries.

[A]

None.

[B]

You know, so, like, somebody has to fucking punch her in the gut in a moment or she'll just continue doing it. But she seems unstoppable in that way. So, like.

[A]

Unstoppable and enabled. Like, now your husband, who should have your back is like, oh, well, you. You know, you're overreacting. And she's embarrassed and she sends her apologies, but you shouldn't have stormed off. You shouldn't have told her to go to hell. It's on you. No, I don't think it's on me. We're not going to call our baby your mom's name Veronica. We. When has that been discussed? And then she's trying to fucking psychologically warfare me with saying you had a big head. So, great. That's gonna make me feel good. I already gotta worry about a fucking watermelon coming out of me. Great. Now I gotta deal with a big head. Thanks. Okay. And then she's the only grandma because my mom's dead. Go fuck yourself. Go to hell. Go to hell. You rot in Satan's little prison. You deserve it.

[B]

Yeah, agreed. I think that it borders on the line of, like, insecurity and narcissism.

[A]

It's definitely coming from a place of, like, deep insecurity. Cause, like, otherwise, like, why are you threatened by another grandma that's gone?

[B]

Gone, gone? Like, are you that insecure? Is it even about the grandma being dead? Or is it about me being a woman and being in the mix? You know what I mean? Like, does the death mean anything to you? Or is it just that I'm existing in this family? Like, I think that she's threatened in. In many ways.

[A]

But, you know, I mean, she. Our writer here, op is coming between the mom and her son. So maybe there's some jealousy, insecurity. There has to be.

[B]

Maybe she's, like, super beautiful or, like, you know, the attention has been taken a little bit or something. She needs that.

[A]

I could see that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because I would, like, be very curious if you asked her. Like, in the moment, Veronica, if you were dead, you wouldn't be a grandma. Hope nothing happens to you, period. Like, I would in that moment. Like, I. Oh, I would. I would be so hurt. And me, too. I'm a People pleaser too. Like, I've been in kind of awkward situations like this where shit gets said to you and you just kind of like. Yeah.

[B]

But you hold on to it. You have to deal with it eventually. Yeah, but like, nice for her to like actually say something in the moment.

[A]

I want this energy. Like I want to be this big of a person. I can do that.

[B]

Like, I'll take like a week and then I'll be like, you know, but also it's like it's your partner's problem. It's not really yours, you know?

[A]

No, but it's like it becomes yours when like your partner doesn't have your.

[B]

Back and doesn't do anything about it.

[A]

Yeah. And it's like, that's your family of origin. Like that is who you're supposed to deal with.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm your person. You're supposed to have my back. Especially when it comes to your family.

[B]

Cuz dealing with a mother in law like that, it'll only get worse if you're the enemy.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And like your angel son is like the, you know, like God's gift to the earth.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like it'll never get better.

[A]

No. And it, I mean, she says, like, I've never had a great relationship with his mom. It's only going to get worse now.

[B]

He probably hates you, baby. Yeah.

[A]

Which. Yeah. Oh my God. I've read stories on Reddit too, in past episodes where like, the mom does not like daughter in law and like talks shit about the mom to the kids. Like, grandma loves you so much more than mommy. Like what?

[B]

Like it's giving like Monster in law.

[A]

That movie with like, oh my God, JLo, Jane Fonda.

[B]

Jane Fonda.

[A]

I love.

[B]

Like, you win. You win. Are we done? Like we're good?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, can we be done with this? Like, it's exhausting because it's their battle. You're just like appeasing them.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And that sucks.

[A]

Ugh. Top comment on this one. Your mother in law said something severely inappropriate and insensitive. No person in their right mind would think that she was okay. No matter how many years have passed since your mother's death. Hell, my grandmother passed away 10 years ago. And when my son was born two years ago, my mom and I talked a lot about how much we missed her and how we wished she was here to see him. We still say this often when he's reached a milestone or even if we're just doing something we know that she would have enjoyed, we say this. It's natural to think about Deceased relatives more at a time like this. And she says something as callous as that. Not the asshole.

[B]

Mm, mm, mm.

[A]

And next comment down says, and she can apologize herself, not through her son, which that pisses me off. You're gonna make your son apologize for you. No, no, no. You're saying it to my face. You're not getting off easy.

[B]

Yeah, because both of you don't mean it at that point. You know what I mean? I think that she's unfixable, and I think that he's unfixable as well. She's not going to ever take blame or apologize or mean it. If she says that, she doesn't mean it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And he's just doing it to keep the peace because he's like, oh, these two girls in my life, you know, proofs of the pudding. Like, show me. I know I don't have to tell you.

[A]

No. And that's how, like, all of these, like, life proof is in the pudding. Like, your actions need to demonstrate you actually give a shit. And like, my feelings were. Were validated. Like, you heard me.

[B]

Exactly. Look at what happened. Like, this is not wrong to you. Hello.

[A]

We. We do get an update. Gag. We get an update.

[B]

Did they separate? Tell me they tell me they divorced.

[A]

Just want to take a moment to say thank you all for your support. Your comments and messages have been incredibly eye opening.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

After staying with my sister for a few days, my husband came over. He said he understood why I was hurt, but felt that I overreacted.

[B]

No.

[A]

He asked me to apologize to my mother in law to keep the peace, which felt like a betrayal. I had hoped he would stand up for me. That night, my mother in law sent a long text doubling down on her joke and saying, my grief is becoming a burden on everyone.

[B]

Oh, girl.

[A]

She told me that I need to seek professional help and move on. Since it's been almost a year. I. Since almost devastated.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Almost a year. Not even a year has she lost.

[B]

Anyone in her life. How insensitive is that?

[A]

I already know I'm gonna be catatonic. Podcasts will not exist for quite some time after. Like, I'm just like, what? What?

[B]

Fuck off. Hate her. Hate her.

[A]

I showed my husband the message, but he got angry at me for escalating things. He said I should make peace with her for our child's sake and that he didn't want to be caught in the middle. I've decided to take some space and stay with my sister. I'm really struggling to Come to terms with this. This whole situation has made me question if my marriage is right for me and my baby. I need an environment where I feel respected and supported, and I don't feel that way right now. I told my husband that if he wants me back, he needs to show me he can stand up for me. I'm putting myself and my baby first. I don't know what will happen next, but I know I deserve better than this. My sister and I are currently turning her old office into. Into a room prepping for Rosies after my mom Rosa's arrival. I feel truly blessed to have her support. Thank you again for all your support. It has meant more than you know.

[B]

Oh. I mean, he's got to really do some shit.

[A]

I don't. For me, I. I hold grudges. Like, you, like, I. I, like, can move past it. I never, like. And this is like, I maybe should work on this, but, like, I don't truly forgive and I don't forget, but I just, like, I move on. Like, I don't have time to deal with that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And like, you're not worth wasting any of my energy or another thought on.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So, like, for me, this would be very hard to recover from with a baby.

[B]

With him. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, you have to co parent. Like, that's in your future now.

[B]

But also don't have to. For forgive or forget.

[A]

No.

[B]

To co parent.

[A]

No.

[B]

You just had to do.

[A]

Well, exactly.

[B]

But, like, be a good co parent.

[A]

Yeah. To be with him again.

[B]

I don't like you. I hate you, actually. But, like, loves that. You better pay. Show up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, all the days and all that stuff.

[A]

Yeah. No, I'd rather co parent than have to sleep with him again.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, my God.

[A]

There's no chance.

[B]

Oh, I'm so. Once that's done, it's like, I'm so icked out.

[A]

Like, kill me, repulse. Don't touch me.

[B]

You know what? It's so funny. Like, your sister obviously is a blessing here.

[A]

Oh, my God. Huge.

[B]

You know, so you have that backpack, backbone, whatever. Like, you have her do that. But, you know, if you really, really, really, really, really love him, then he's gonna have to really, really, really, really, really do a lot to prove himself. Because you always know what you felt with him during this time. So, like, he's gonna really have to turn a corner, which is, like, kind of hard for guys. Especially, like, his stance that he made. I overreacted. You're taking your mom's side, like, sucks.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Because it seems like he's just a goner. He's a goner.

[A]

It would be very hard to come back from this. I don't know. Like, he would definitely. He would have to move mountains. And I mean, for me, it seems like he's very attached to his mom. Like, you guys marry her. You guys are literally. I think some of these people should. And some of the moms would. They'd want that.

[B]

They would love to marry their sons.

[A]

Some of the boy mom content that's online. Like, I'm like, you actually recorded that? Edited that?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Watched it back again and then posted that.

[B]

Yeah. You're in love with your son. You're sick. Yeah.

[A]

Like, oh, my God. It's disgusting.

[B]

Prison.

[A]

I don't know. Like, he needs to cut his umbilical cord from his mom. Like, something's gotta give. But this post is a year old. We have no further updates.

[B]

I thought you said seven months ago.

[A]

This one's a year old.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

So she's had the baby. Jesus Christ. If you're out there, please, we need another update.

[B]

We're, like, so invested.

[A]

Where are you? Did he come around? What happened?

[B]

God bless the sister. That's all I'll say.

[A]

I know.

[B]

I know what it's like to have a sister to fall back on and. Damn. Like, that's very lucky.

[A]

Huge. I mean, having that village when you're part of her.

[B]

She could have nothing. She could still be in that. With that guy and his godforsaken mom.

[A]

I know. Horrible. Horrible. But moving along to this next update.

[B]

God bless you and the child.

[A]

Give me an update.

[B]

Yeah, we need an update now.

[A]

Come back. This episode of two Hot Takes is brought to you by Wayfair. This is not your first rodeo. After all of the wild and somewhat uncomfortable stories we read on this show, one thing's for sure. Life can be unhinged. That's why your home should be your calm, comfy, happy place. And Wayfair totally gets that. My happy place includes a nice sofa, an ottoman to kick my feet up on, and a blankie. You guys know I love a blankie. And I love pieces that look good and are going to last. And that's what I've gotten with Wayfair. A lot of my studio furniture is even from Wayfair. And they delivered, it, came in, set it up, it was seamless. And I'm even trusting Wayfair for the lounge furniture for our wedding. So whether it's furniture, storage, solutions, decor, you can get it all in one place at Wayfair Shop everything [e-mail] with free and easy delivery straight to your door. That's W A Y f a I r.com Wayfair Every style Every home this episode is brought to you by Ollie. You know what shouldn't be a hot take wanting great sex and a healthy hoo ha. Ollie gets it from loving libido so you can get yours or period hero for PMS support. Ollie puts women's wellness first. Find these supplements and more at any national retailer [e-mail] that's O L L Y.com these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Okay, this next one. Yeah coming from Am I the asshole? Titled Am I the asshole for not complimenting my wife so that she won't become vain? Vain?

[B]

Weird word.

[A]

My wife, 29, female, and I, 31 male, have been together for 10 years. We have three children, 9, 7 and 5. My wife was never someone to really dress up or put that much thought into her looks. She's always been beautiful but never did much to highlight it. Until recently. She went through this crisis of feeling like she didn't have a personality outside of being a mom, something like that. So for the last two years she started traveling more, joining different groups, dressing really nicely, wearing makeup. I never realized how much of a difference it would make, but people treat her completely different. She is constantly getting complimented, told that she should be in magazines. She'll come home and happily tell me about the random stranger who was so nice to her. She'll randomly get gifts. Lady at her job brought her a book series she was even interested in. She gets hit on when we go out. All these dudes want to buy her drinks. Even my family has noticed and all of a sudden it seems like they're wondering how I ended up with her. Honestly, it's a bit overwhelming for me and something I'm just not used to. It's kind of become annoying. Anyways, she was going out with friends and she asked me how she looked. I said fine. She seemed disappointed with this. My sister was over and commented that I should hype her up. I said why? Why should I do that when the world already does that? I don't want her thinking too highly of herself and becoming more vain.

[B]

You're a pussy. I hate this man.

[A]

My sister looked shocked and said that's fucked up.

[B]

It is.

[A]

Said that's low key, abusive and that I'm an Yes, I think she's overthinking it, but I decided to get some outside opinions. So am I the asshole?

[B]

You're an asshole. You're a pussy. You're a bitch. You have been with this woman for 10 years.

[A]

You said 10 fucking years. She gave him three kids.

[B]

She's hot as hell now. Step up. You get hot to stop being insecure. Stop trying to put her down. How do I look? Fine. Girl, you know that. She looks fucking bomb as shit. You're a pussy.

[A]

Fine. He's trying to take her confidence down. He's trying to bring it back to his level. He's trying to humble her. She doesn't. Oh, my God.

[B]

Even the fam, Even the family notices that she's more confident, more sexy, more whatever.

[A]

Too good for him. She's too good for him.

[B]

Girl, step up or get away from her because she doesn't deserve that. Like, I hate you hate him.

[A]

I can't stand this. It's just like, so toxic, so insecure. And it's not his job to humble her. I. It's like, why? Yeah, why don't you step up? Like you're watching her.

[B]

Yeah. Like, oh, my God, she's so hot. She's. Yeah, you can't step up exactly. Like what you said.

[A]

Yeah, well, and it's really annoying because I think a lot of moms go through that where they're like, I don't know who I am outside of being a mom. Like, she's got three kids, nine, seven and five. They're finally at ages where they're a little more self sustaining. They're all in school. And so she's finding herself again after maybe being a stay at home mom and that being all she had.

[B]

Right?

[A]

And that is a lot. That's such a big burden. So now she's like, she's traveling a bit, she's joining different groups, she's dressing up and you're threatened. So you're gonna then take her back down, Right?

[B]

She outgrew you, clearly.

[A]

She is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, and that is. That's life. Like, you grow constantly with a partner. So it's like, why are you not trying to grow? Why are you not traveling with her? Why are you not going to events or a hobby or that? Like, why aren't you stepping up?

[B]

I hate this kind of man. I hate it.

[A]

It's so insecure.

[B]

He should be clapping for her, taking her photos. Oh, my God. Like, look at you. Power mom, three kids. This is our life.

[A]

My jaw is just dropped, you guys. Like, I'm Just like I'm, I'm just slack jaw. Like I just like don't know what to think.

[B]

It's sad. I mean you carry, you carry three kids. I can't even imagine having one child, let alone having three. And then leav. Leveling up afterwards like, well, she's got four. Woman is a superhero. Like, you carry one child. Lazy ass. And then don't put me down. How dare you?

[A]

And he gets to reap the rewards. Like you get a hot ass wife who's cultured and interesting. Exactly. And fun.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you're complaining about that.

[B]

You feel bad for being amazing. Like, I am too good for you. My family is right.

[A]

And she's gonna start to realize it the more you act like that.

[B]

She should. I mean, guy, this guy, he needs a reality check.

[A]

He sure does. Hardcore comments do. Give it to him.

[B]

Yeah. Okay.

[A]

Over here. Let's hear, let's hear overall vote. Luckily.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Top comment. You're the asshole, dude. If your wife doesn't think or know or hear you express that you think she's beautiful, then what's going to stop her from leaving you for someone who does tell her that she's beautiful and treats her wonderfully. Your wife is beautiful. And you thought she was great even without all the makeup and, and the new style and the new interest. Now that she has all of those things and what you feel left behind do you take.

[B]

You're in the mix though. You're not left behind. Like you probably sleep next to her every single day. Like you're losing it.

[A]

You're not a pity invite. Like she's, she chose to go through life with you.

[B]

Exactly. Like if she went away for the weekend with a girlfriend or whatever, you'd be like, she left me. Like, would you appreciate her more?

[A]

I know.

[B]

Like you're writing in because she's hotter than you now.

[A]

I don't know how he thought he was gonna get a novel sympathy from this.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

The comment goes on to say, do you take any interest in her new interest? Travel at all with her? What are you doing to make sure your wife feels seen? Or are you just bitter that she is finally realizing how beautiful and interesting and worthy of all of this friendship and kindness from others and wondering where you stand in all of this? I think she's awesome for taking charge of herself and her life. She didn't feel like she was seen or acknowledged as anything other than mom. And did you do anything to make her feel like she was loved a beautiful wife like she is, and she endeavored to change that. And it's bearing beautiful fruit. Your wife is awesome.

[B]

Are they in the room with us? That person I know who just wrote that, Honestly, he needs to fuck off, get into it or get lost. Honestly, because she's put up with enough.

[A]

You know, Lottie are the assholes. A lot of people being like, great strategy, dude. Treat her as if she doesn't matter and you don't see her as attractive, so she can constantly be reminded that there are other people out there who do care about her and do find her attractive. Come back in a year or so and let us know how it works out. In the meantime, think about how you want the custody arrangements to work. Oh, God, you're the asshole.

[B]

He's totally the asshole. I mean, how could you not, like, come on, girl, look in the mirror.

[A]

I know there are a couple comments from OP Basically, he says, I'm just saying too many compliments can go to someone's head. I don't think she needs that.

[B]

I mean, okay, I get it. Like, sometimes even, like, with a friend or something, you're like, oh, people are blowing too much smoke up their ass. Like, they need to be humbled. But she's had three of your children. That's your person. Like, you should want to amp them up, even if they're getting too much. The only reason that I would see that that wouldn't be acceptable is if she was, like, acting like a bitch or, like, treating him like shit. Being like, anyways, whatever, like, over you. No, but it doesn't seem like that.

[A]

No.

[B]

Like, I would want to build her up beyond. And the more compliments she got, the better I'd be like, yes. Like, you're everything I know. You know?

[A]

He's very threatened. I mean, he tries to brush it off in other comments, like, I just don't want her becoming a person that only cares about looks. Constantly trying to look her best. I don't want her seeking validation via compliments. I don't want her to become one of those girls that seeks validation or is fishing for compliments. He just keeps responding the same bullshit back to people again and again. There's multiple comments of him saying, I don't want her to seek validation. Guess what? Everyone likes to be complimented. Everyone likes to, like, be recognized here and there for whatever it is. Dressing up one day, their accomplishments, being kind feels fucking nice. Everyone likes their horn tooted here and there.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Beep, beep.

[B]

You know what? It kind of beep, beep, bitch. It kind of Feels like he liked her fat and pregnant.

[A]

I think he. And maybe that's a control thing.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

Maybe that is a control thing.

[B]

Like, yeah, now she's hot. She's got kind of like, you know, little gas in her system. She's feeling great.

[A]

Yeah, he's definitely.

[B]

He's, like, too hot. You're too hot. You look too good. I'm nervous I'm going to lose you because now I'm old and fat.

[A]

Dad. Bob.

[B]

Yeah. Get in the gym if you're nervous about her.

[A]

You know what worries me about him, too, because of how deeply insecure he is. He's someone that. Maybe this is a reach, you guys, but I feel like he could be one of those people that, like, has an affair as retaliation to try to.

[B]

Like, stick it to her.

[A]

Yeah. Or like, he's not feeling good about himself because his wife is so much hotter. And then he's gonna go find someone who does make him feel hot. Like he's. He. I just. I worry about him.

[B]

Ugh.

[A]

I worry about her more so her. Because she's stuck with him.

[B]

Yes. And, like, girl, like, we gotta. We really gotta sort this out. Like, he is. You're living with enemy number one, and that's hard.

[A]

Ain't that the truth?

[B]

Yeah. Like, you used to be in love. We used to have all the fun in the world, and now you are my number one fan club hater.

[A]

Yeah. Husband is your biggest hater.

[B]

So look at that. You know, that sucks. You want to live with someone that compliments you more than anyone else.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And he's telling you that you're getting complimented too much.

[A]

Yeah. You look fine. Fine. Just fine.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Okay, bye. We don't have an update. It's two years old. I think he got reprimanded a decent amount and never came back.

[B]

Oh, I hope so. So I really hope so.

[A]

We got nothing. But, you know, maybe she'll see this and be like, yeah, this kind of rings a bell.

[B]

I hope so.

[A]

Divorce.

[B]

Yes. Get it, you hot mom of three. Or you could be. You're living the dream.

[A]

That's insane.

[B]

You don't need any haters in your corner whatsoever.

[A]

No.

[B]

Yeah. No.

[A]

This. This next one, I can't tell if it's a hater or what's going on here. I'm gonna need your help.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This episode is brought to you by Kraft Mac and Cheese. Kraft Mac and Cheese is the best thing ever. It's even better than a juicy dating story. Kraft Mac and Cheese will fill you with joy and giddiness. Without any of the secondhand anxiety. Because while Kraft Mac and Cheese is definitely cheesy, it's never cringe. Pick up a box in store or online today. Kraft Mac and Cheese Best thing Ever. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Just like choosing which honeymoon photo to post, State Farm has options to choose from to help you find the coverage that best fits your needs. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with the personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on ratings plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer availability, amount of discounts, and savings and eligibility vary by state. Okay, this is also coming from Amethe titled Am I the Asshole for walking out of my boyfriend's birthday dinner after the comment his dad made about my age? Apologies. Accidentally deleted the first one. Going to dive right in. I, female, 36, met my boyfriend, male, 38 months ago. He waited to introduce me to his parents and decided that I'd meet them on his 36th birthday party that was held at their house. Not gonna lie, I was nervous about a number of things. I'm over 30, but I can still get anxious. I'm an introvert. Yay around new people. We got to their house. There were more guests there than I thought. Like a lot more. When we sat down for dinner, his dad looked at me head to toe and said, oh God damn. I thought you would look a lot older than you do. You've still got a good 10 years of sex kitten left in you.

[B]

Ew. Ew ew ew ew.

[A]

I was shocked, completely baffled. The whole table went quiet and I couldn't even look around. But I knew that they were staring at me awkwardly. My boyfriend and his dad were laughing hard. It got so overwhelming for me. I excused myself, got up, took my stuff, and started making my way out. My boyfriend followed me while asking where I was going and why. I stood at the door and pointed out his dad's comment about my age. He said that his dad is just like that, brutally honest and tells it like it is and so I shouldn't take it personal. I told him it was personal because it felt like he was raiding me and my functions as a human based on age. He was like, come on, do you always have to be so dramatic? Let it go. It was nothing. He told me to go back inside, but I decided to go home. He was livid. He sent angry texts talking about how disappointed he and his family were by how I walked out and disrespected them and gave them the wrong impression about me. He also said I ruined his birthday and overreacted to nothing and I should have just laughed it off. He's demanding that I reach out to his family with apologies and make it up to him. Am I the asshole? Did I overreact?

[B]

Um, yeah, you're the asshole. Just kidding. No, you're not. I think that there's a kind of girl that could take this from a dad and her boyfriend. Clearly, you are not meant to be in this family.

[A]

Yeah, I. That would just gross me out. Like, I don't want your dad, but.

[B]

Some girlfriends, like, get off on that. You know what I mean?

[A]

Like, it's like, your dad thinks I'm hot.

[B]

Yeah. It's, like, fun. Like, oh, yeah. Like, I'm hotter than my age. Whatever. But, like, clearly you can't take it, and this is not the family for you.

[A]

No. And that's okay. I wouldn't want this energy.

[B]

I wouldn't either. But some girls like, like that. Yeah. I would never. Like, good for you for leaving.

[A]

Yeah. And standing your ground again, like, holding that boundary of, like, behavior you're willing to put up with. And, like, that's unacceptable behavior. So I'm removing myself. That's. That's how I feel.

[B]

And you know what? You know what pissed me off about that, too? Why do you always have to be so dramatic? I've known you for months. Right? Months.

[A]

Months.

[B]

Always so dramatic. And you brought me into a situation where I was so pressured and then demeaned me, like, sexualized me in a way. Yeah. That I had to leave. Like, that's shitty.

[A]

Well, and I think it's, like, even more so apparent and important, like, to highlight this, like, she's 36. She's not 86. She's not 96. Like, she's 36. And so the fact that, like, he's. He is tying her looks and all of this to, like, oh, you're 36. Wow. I thought you'd look a lot worse. Wow. Like, what the. I'm not dead. I'm 36. Like, come on, they need prison.

[B]

That whole family needs prison.

[A]

I just like the monkeys and, like, flying monkey mentality of, like, people running and, like, you need to apologize to them. I'm not saying anything to them.

[B]

No, no.

[A]

He needs to apologize to me. That was uncomfortable.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

Top comment on this one. Not the asshole. His dad called you a sex kitten.

[B]

Wait, he did?

[A]

That's.

[B]

What, Did I miss that part?

[A]

Dad looked at her and said, you've still got a good 10 years of sex kitten left in you aby to actually throw up.

[B]

That's disgusting.

[A]

Sex kitten.

[B]

And the boyfriend took the dad's side.

[A]

Oh, he was laughing really hard.

[B]

That is so, so sick. That dad is manipulative and has like a.

[A]

He's like one of those pervy joke dads. Like, you've been around one or two. I feel like everyone has. And they just like constantly make sexual jokes and it's just like they think it's fine. This is enough.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh my God.

[B]

Thank God you weren't like touched or anything. Cuz I feel like that dad would like, take it to like.

[A]

Oh, under the table.

[B]

Physical level.

[A]

Exactly. I like how to look up sex kitten. I'm just like, what? I've never like, heard that used.

[B]

It gives like stripper vibes.

[A]

Sex kitten.

[B]

Like woman of the night.

[A]

It's very like. It's definitely an older term, I think, but it's a young woman who asserts or exploits her sexual attractiveness.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He.

[B]

Fudgeing wishes that she would. She's just existing.

[A]

Just chilling.

[B]

Yeah, I'm, I'm here. I was invited to a birthday party, which is also a lot, don't you.

[A]

Think, to meet them for the first time. Yeah. Not like an intimate gathering. No, like, there was a lot of people there and like, she's an introvert.

[B]

I get very insensitive.

[A]

I like, I just. No, like, it should have been more one on one and like easygoing.

[B]

Even if you were with him for like five years, let's say to go to like, everyone there is a lot.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, that's intimidating.

[A]

It is. And like, the way he drew attention to her, like, oh, you sex kitten. The comment goes on to be like, his dad called you a sex kitten. And then they bowled this. An aging sex kitten. I also. I'm so sorry. I keep saying kitten weird. I'm sorry, you guys. Everyone's gonna be like, what the.

[B]

I didn't notice till you brought it up.

[A]

I'm like, why am I saying that? I just learned. I said like hammock, hammock, Hammock weird the other day. I'm like, I don't.

[B]

You said hammock.

[A]

I said hammock on accident.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. Sometimes I read too fast and I just like, don't know what I'm saying.

[B]

Oh, I think it's cute. I Hammock, hammock, hammock.

[A]

But yeah, like, he's literally being like, you're. Yeah, you still got a little time Left in you. Girl.

[B]

Girl. What? How much time do you have in you, sir?

[A]

One foot in the grave.

[B]

Comment on me. Yeah. Don't comment on my looks, sicko.

[A]

What about your wife? What? Like, what about your wife?

[B]

Yeah. Right. Like, that's so uncomfortable.

[A]

Why are you saying this shit to me?

[B]

Yeah. No. He needs to be put in his place. I'm very happy that she left.

[A]

I know.

[B]

But it seems like the son is in no place for a relationship.

[A]

No.

[B]

Nor is his family. She doesn't deserve those as her in laws.

[A]

No. And a lot of people are pointing out, like the apple didn't fall far from the tree and you should throw it far away. Like basically being like, if those are your in laws and he's okay with it. He's laughing like you're kind of getting a good preview.

[B]

Right. Exactly. Like if you go into this relationship, you're gonna. This is gonna be your life.

[A]

Yeah. So there's one comment here from OP that is worth reading. Someone goes. Not the. This is how it will always be with his family. He thinks it's funny. So he will also be like this. I would break up and find someone more respectful. And OP goes. I'm afraid of this becoming the norm. Especially with how he said that his dad is always like this.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, can't change people.

[A]

No.

[B]

Sucks.

[A]

No. But I. I feel like I hope.

[B]

She doesn't really love this guy.

[A]

No. I think based on that comment, I. I saw a breakup in the future.

[B]

I hope so.

[A]

We don't know for sure. There's no update.

[B]

I pray that this girl gets better in her life. Because this is terrible. To wake up every day knowing that this is going to be your life.

[A]

No. And it wouldn't have been the biggest deal if he would have stood by her side.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And if he would have been like, yeah, my dad was dad.

[B]

Shut up. Dad.

[A]

Dad.

[B]

Enough. Too much.

[A]

But like, he didn't back you up. He made it worse. Demonstrated. It's okay. And you kind of got a glimpse.

[B]

That she never really loved him and it was just a boyfriend fling thing.

[A]

A fling.

[B]

Cause that would suck.

[A]

A fleeting thing.

[B]

Cause she will end up leaving him if she hasn't already. Right.

[A]

I could see it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I could see it. Think your lashes have hit their limit? Discover limitless length and full volume with Maybelline's Sky High mascara. The Flextower Brush bends to volumize and extend every single lash from root to tip. And the lightweight bamboo infused formula makes lashes feel weightless now in eight bold shades. So you can take your lashes to new heights every day. Visit maybelline.com to shop sky high mascara. Now. This episode is brought to you by.

[B]

Spotify Portal for Backstage. But you're wondering, what's Portal? Well, it's an internal developer developer portal built to improve developer experience and boost productivity. All software components are centralized. Documentation is automated and easy to maintain.

[A]

New projects and components, just a few clicks.

[B]

With your best practices already built in.

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Okay, I'm going to give you a choice on this next one.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

Okay. Option number one. Am I the asshole for telling my husband he can't have his ex at our baby shower even though they're still friends? Or am I overreacting for telling my boyfriend I won't be his free photographer anymore and sending him a rate sheet?

[B]

Okay. Charging your boyfriend. You're the asshole. Okay.

[A]

Let's see.

[B]

Right?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Has to be. What do you think? What do you think?

[A]

I think you. You're gonna get the context and I think.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

Okay. You ready?

[B]

Yeah. What was the first one again?

[A]

I'll just give it to you both. Okay, that'll be. That'll be okay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. Okay. That'll be number two. We'll end with that one.

[B]

The second one was more shocking. Okay, you're charging your boyfriend.

[A]

You're gonna love.

[B]

What are you gonna charge him for? A him for going down on you like what? You guys are in a relationship.

[A]

You're gonna love this. Okay, I'm 26, female, and my boyfriend is 28, male and trying to build a fitness page. When we started dating, it was cute. I'd hold the phone while he filmed deadlifts, pick a song, and we'd laugh at the outtakes. In the last months, it has turned into a whole operation. He texts me at 6:50am golden hour, question mark and expects me outside with a tripod, two shirts, his shaker and a towel. Saturdays, I'm at the park, squatting in weird angles so his jawline looks sharp. Sundays, I'm in our hallway editing on Cap Cut while he plays Ranked. I don't even like being on camera, but people in the comments keep calling me camera girl, like that's my name. I missed brunch once because he needed a second take in the stairwell. The neighbor walked by and I wanted to evaporate. I tried to set limits. I said one session a week, he heard daily. I asked him to learn the basics so he could run it solo. He said my hands are steadier and my eye is better. Last week, he booked a brand shoot with a small supplement shop. He told them we could deliver 15 reels and 40 photos. We hate this guy.

[B]

Hate him, hate him. Dead, death, prison.

[A]

We as in me, the unpaid department of everything. They gave him six tubs of pre workout as payment. I'm allergic to caffeine and still ended up scrubbing chalk dust off my leggings for two hours.

[B]

Poor girl. She must really love him.

[A]

That night, he casually asked if I could stay up to color grade. Now it's just sliders, babe. I snapped. I told him I'm done being free labor, that I'm happy to help sometimes like a normal partner, but not manage your content calendar. I made a simple rate sheet. $35 per hour filming, 20 per hour editing, plus a cap at four hours a week. I sent it to him so it's clear and we don't fight. He got really pissed and said I'm sabotaging his dream and making our relationship transactional. He says real couples support each other.

[B]

What the fuck are you doing for me?

[A]

And that if he had a big exam, I'd want him to quiz me. I said quizzing is 20 minutes, not a second job. Now he's giving me short replies and filming with a friend who DMed me. Dang, you went corporate. Did I overreact by putting a price and boundaries on something that started as a favor?

[B]

I think that you actually underreacted and I. You know what? You can either. You can. What's that saying? You lead a horse to water, but.

[A]

You can't force them to drink.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. Like, bitch, if this is your hobby, your dream, your whatever. Destiny, you can learn how to edit and shoot yourself. It's not hard. Like, I could teach you in two hours, and I'm sure that she could too.

[A]

I could put you through a bootcamp.

[B]

Exactly. Like let's do.

[A]

There's so much free shit on YouTube and TikTok showing you how to edit and use cap cut.

[B]

Yeah, he's abusive. And her. I mean, even getting to the point of doing a spreadsheet of. Of costs.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Is a lot.

[A]

Like, that takes time.

[B]

It does. And I feel like she should have been like, I'm not doing this for you anymore. We're gonna hire you somebody, or you're gonna learn yourself.

[A]

Go on, fiverr. Go on upwork. Go look at other people's rates. Yeah, she was pretty competitive. Those are good rates.

[B]

I thought so too. $20 an hour for editing, but not my boyfriend, who I'm seeing all the time. You know what I mean?

[A]

Like, and he's just, like, walking all over her and like, oh, if I got a text at 6:50am Golden.

[B]

Golden hour.

[A]

And I was expected to bring a tripod and your shaker blender for your. Your protein shake or your pre workout. No, no.

[B]

He's a. Find somebody that you can pay for all that. Well, not your girlfriend. Like, that's not romantic.

[A]

No. And his buddy's not going to do it for free. I can't imagine his buddy does it for free.

[B]

No, he's abusing her.

[A]

And the fact. This was so crazy to me. 15 reels and 40 photos, and all he got was six tubs of pre workout.

[B]

Was that all he got, though? In the back of my mind, I was like, you think he was. Was that all he got?

[A]

Maybe a little something else under the table. Not cutting her in.

[B]

Mm. Mm. Oh, he clearly does not respect her. Like, he's not gonna cut her into anything.

[A]

No.

[B]

Fuck that guy. Hate him.

[A]

Top comment. Nope, didn't overreact. Bro wants a free employee, but is trying to frame it as a supportive partner, which is very manipulative.

[B]

It's so abusive.

[A]

Like, you're not.

[B]

What's your goal? Is he supporting you? Probably not.

[A]

I know he tried to, like, play it off, like, oh, the quiz thing.

[B]

Like, I would help you.

[A]

Yeah. And so I'm kind of.

[B]

It's not equal, though. He's, like, very narcissistic.

[A]

A bunch of free labor, editing, like, that is. That's a career for people. That is, like, a lot of work for people.

[B]

Do it yourself. Like, it's really not that hard.

[A]

I think a lot of the best creators and a lot of the best, like, people out there started on their own. They learned how to do it from the ground up. And, like, that has also helped in their success. So learn how to do it.

[B]

You know what? Also, not to be crazy, but know your worth. You are this man's career.

[A]

I mean, you're the whole reason he has content.

[B]

Exactly. He's abusing you to do shit for free. You're like, I should be getting paid for this. Like, no, no.

[A]

And the fact that he should be.

[B]

Offering to pay for this.

[A]

Yeah. And the fact that you keep getting called camera girl.

[B]

That would piss me off. I'd be so resentful.

[A]

Like, it's Morgan, bitch.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Come on.

[B]

Or like, maybe I don't even know what a camera is anymore. Oh, oops, forgot.

[A]

What's. What's that button do?

[B]

I don't have final cut anymore. Cap cut. Sorry, it deleted. I have no idea what to do.

[A]

My phone doesn't allow me to have that.

[B]

I can't figure it out.

[A]

Yeah, how strange.

[B]

So weird.

[A]

There's no update. It's only nine days old. Oh, send back so let us know. It's very fresh. Very fresh. So maybe we'll see a little something something soon.

[B]

I hope so.

[A]

But until then, fuck that guy. That's all we got. That's all we got. But here we go, our other juicy one. I teased you. So this is titled. Am I the asshole for telling my husband that he cannot have his ex at our baby shower even though they're still friends? I, 27, female, am pregnant with our first child. My husband, 30, male, is still friendly with his ex girlfriend, 31, female. I don't mind that she's in his friend group, but when we were planning the baby shower, he casually said, quote, we should invite her too. She's part of our crew. I told him I'd be uncomfortable. He said I was being territorial and insecure and that not everything's about jealousy.

[B]

Oh, God.

[A]

It's not jealousy. It's just weird to have the woman he used to love at my baby shower. He told me if I start excluding people for feelings, I'll drive everyone away. Now he's sulking and saying I made things awkward. Am I the asshole for saying no?

[B]

No.

[A]

Mm.

[B]

Mm. Um. God, I have so many feelings.

[A]

Let him out.

[B]

I think that he is in love with her.

[A]

Something's still going on.

[B]

Mm.

[A]

I see a comment here that I really, really love.

[B]

What do you. What do you think?

[A]

I think he's, like, harboring feelings. Like, I. I understand still having that friend group. And, like, she's in the friend group, so, like, she's in the group hanging the crew. Yeah, but this isn't a group hang. This is your intimate baby shower. You're celebrating your love and this little bundle of joy you created. What does it have to do with your.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Why do you want someone?

[B]

Why are you fighting for her to be there to fuck? Like, if I say no? Yeah, then it's a no. Like it's not a bigger issue. Like, I said no. What if you said no? What am I gonna fight for?

[A]

I'd be like, okay, what if you wanted your ex there?

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Would you be okay with someone I used to be intimate with and sleep with?

[B]

Love.

[A]

Love.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. Would you be okay with that? No, that's it. Period. She needs to be here. Why?

[A]

Yeah, top comment. I'd ask him why her presence means more to him than your comfort.

[B]

He hates you. He. He loves her. He hates you. He doesn't respect you.

[A]

I just don't understand how he's like, if you're going to start excluding people for feelings, you're going to drive everyone away. What does that even mean?

[B]

It's like trying to drive you into the dirt for your feelings. Like, a simple feeling of one person. Like, I would rather be alone, honestly.

[A]

Fine.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

Also, who. It's like, it seems like this is the only person.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it's because this was an ex that you loved.

[B]

What are your feelings on staying in contact with exes? Like, how many have you had?

[A]

I'd say, like, three big ones.

[B]

Oh, how many, like, relationships in total?

[A]

Like, I. Well, it's like, you have, like, those awkward situationships. I'm like, you could count those.

[B]

But true. Like, boyfriend, girlfriend.

[A]

Three big ones.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Three big ones.

[B]

And do you still talk to any exes?

[A]

Okay, four big ones.

[B]

Okay. Oh, wait, she forgot about one.

[A]

I have to sit there. I'm like, wait, I'm starting to think there's one that, like, I'm friends with. We don't talk. If I run into him when I'm back home in Minnesota, we're very cordial.

[B]

Love.

[A]

He was just someone that, like, I was able to lean on after another, like, bad breakup.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

We'd go golfing and just, like, hang out. So we were actually friends after, like, he.

[B]

We had.

[A]

There was so much distance. We'd both dated other people, but, like, I don't reach out to them. I don't talk to them.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I wouldn't. I wouldn't do that. No. And, like, my, like, my husband wouldn't care. Like, I've told him, like, oh, yeah, I texted Dave because I had a funny story that, you know, related on the podcast. And he's like, that's. That's hilarious. But, like, I would never be like, oh, I want my ex at our baby shower. Or, I didn't invite any exes to our wedding. Like, I.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I wouldn't cross lines.

[B]

You know what? Also, like, I'm just thinking about this, like, a little bit deeper now. I feel like for him to say, like, no, no, she should be at our baby shower. It's not all him. That's the issue. Because, like, it must be coming at him from her, too. Like, we're having a baby shower. We're pregnant. She's like, well, I want to go. And then he's, like, defending her, trying to fight for her with his wife, being like, no, no, she needs to be there because she's being like, why wouldn't I not be invited?

[A]

That's so true.

[B]

You know what I mean? Like, she's the problem, too. It's like, he's weak.

[A]

I wonder if she's in the background being like, oh, my God, I'm so excited I get to come.

[B]

But, yeah, him not, like, being able to say, like, oh, you know, you're not invited.

[A]

I know. Do you think there's a world where, like, I mean, obviously mom, like, op isn't comfortable, but, like, you know, for some people, this might not be a big issue. Some people might be fine with their ex and, like, this friendship thing, Like, I don't know. I'm like, is there a world where this isn't weird?

[B]

I don't know. Just goes back to what we were saying. The gut thing.

[A]

The gut.

[B]

If you feel like this is freaking weird, it's freaking weird. I know, but, like, maybe try to play it cool and, like, you know, let her come and see what the vibe is. Is she with anybody right now?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

See how he acts around her.

[A]

That's really true. And I guess. How does she make you feel? Because I guess by not inviting her, it doesn't seem like things are, like, super great. Like, is this an ex that is still a little too comfortable with him when you guys are all hanging out in a friend group. Yeah. You guys are married, but she's still touching his arm very affectionately. And prison inside Joe.

[B]

No prison. Hate inside. Jokes like that. Like, shut the up.

[A]

What's the vibe?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Are they genuinely just friends now and happen to be in the same crew.

[B]

Still, or she needs to be respectful and know her place in line.

[A]

I'm very curious what the dynamic is.

[B]

Yeah. Because if she comes to the baby shower, say she is invited, whatever. And she, like, is trying to be, like, territorial or whatever, like, girl, bye, you are never seeing my face again.

[A]

No, that ship has sailed. But a lot of people in the comments are speculating, like, hey, is there any chance they broke up over the issue of having a child? Like, people are like, that's kind of why he wants to invite her. Maybe he feels bad they couldn't have a baby, and he's just like, I.

[B]

Didn'T even think about that.

[A]

I mean, it didn't cross my mind. And I usually go down the rabbit hole very quickly.

[B]

Gag.

[A]

I know a lot of people are speculating about it. Like, maybe the question of a child was what broke them up. It's bad form to have your ex at the celebration of your wife's baby shower. He seems bent on having the ex there. I want to know why.

[B]

Yeah, I just. Guy respect your baby mama and your future child.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

Well, and like, what's your intention? Like, I think that top comment where it's like, why do her feelings matter more than mine? Where it's like, why? What's your intention there? What are you trying to do?

[B]

Even as this conversation, like, why are we even, like, even having a quote unquote fight about this?

[A]

Why wasn't it just like. Okay, I respect that. Yeah.

[B]

I said no.

[A]

All good.

[B]

It's a no.

[A]

Hear you, babe. Yeah, yeah, we'll have a good shower.

[B]

Exactly. Like, choose your battles.

[A]

I know. Very odd.

[B]

Very odd. It makes me think there's something else going on.

[A]

I would agree.

[B]

You know, hate the girl, hate the guy. I just immediately go to hate.

[A]

I mean, it's a strong feeling. It's easy to just like instantly be enraged. It's like, I just, I can't stand them.

[B]

Be there for her. Like, she's pregnant. Yeah. Come on.

[A]

Bare minimum. Bare minimum.

[B]

She literally, like, bow down to her.

[A]

I know. So this post, it's coming from our slash comfort level pod has quite a few comments, 1.4k upvotes. But I think the person started to get maybe a little overwhelmed with the feedback they were getting because they did delete their post. They even went so far as to delete their whole Reddit account.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

So we don't have any updates. We don't have any comments from them. So maybe the comments are giving them thought and that you like, it's a little scary cuz like you go to Reddit and you're like, maybe I am overreacting.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And then people are like, you're not overreacting. Your husband sucks. Like, blah, blah, blah. And then you're like, too much.

[B]

Too real.

[A]

Yeah, too real. Like, is something going on? And I'm sure that's like, she's pregnant. Like, I would spiral. Like, what the going on?

[B]

Yeah. Hard not to.

[A]

Hard not to.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's all we got. That's the show, baby.

[B]

Blessed be. I really hope for this girl that she, you know, gets it together.

[A]

I know. I would love an update on so many of these.

[B]

Yeah. Especially, I mean, honestly, what I'm taking from my time here is that guys need to grow up.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And we just. We put up with too much.

[A]

There's definitely. There was a lot of people here, dudes that need to get a reality check and just support the women. Like, I know we have a lot of couples that, like, do listen together. And so, like, you guys, if you're listening to this show, like, you're one of the good ones, but, like, encourage your friends. Be better. Yeah, do better. Don't be toxic. Support your partner. Exactly. Like, get it together.

[B]

Look inward, look outward. It's not all about your toxic masculinity. And if I came off, like, really hateful during this.

[A]

During this episode, I'm damage control now.

[B]

I'm sorry. Like, I'm just thinking the whole time I was like, kill him. Hate him. Break up with him.

[A]

No, I gave you some, like, really horrible people. I mean, the theme was ugly hearts. Like, they had some ugly ass hearts.

[B]

It was tough to even, like, for me to, like, step outside and be like, well, what. What if he's feeling this way? Like, no, hate him. He's a bitch.

[A]

Honestly, these ones did not need a devil's advocate. Like, they were just straight up the devil.

[B]

Yeah. Well, I hope that. I hope that the people that wrote in heard this.

[A]

I'm gonna send him the link. Be like, hey, hey, yeah, give me an update now.

[B]

Updates, please. Oh, my God. That's, like, the fun thing about this show. I feel like you just, like, wait for the updates.

[A]

I know. Well, I will be honest. I actually gave you more updates than I usually give my guests.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I didn't want to. Like, I realized I had Sal from Impractical Jokers on a couple weeks ago, and, like, I didn't realize how torturous it was for people to come on here and, like, not get an update. I'm so used to it. So I really tried to give you a lot of updates today.

[B]

I think that you should do that for a lot of guests, especially during the holiday season, because it's like a Christmas miracle. Like, I can't imagine hearing this, like, crazy detrimental problem and not knowing how they handled it.

[A]

I know. Okay, I'll keep serving up the updates, guys. Gigi, where can people find you? I heard you have a podcast. You're back on your vlogs.

[B]

Yes. Oh, I'm. I'm Gigi. Gorgeous. Everywhere. G I G I G O R G E O U S yeah, filming again. Doing all the things.

[A]

All the things.

[B]

You know how it is.

[A]

Your vlogs are really cute. Like, really relatable. You're very open about everything. You're going through in your life, which you I really appreciate. And you said something in one that I listened to, and you're like, I'm so bad with grief. I hate grief and loss. And I'm like, same. Yeah, same.

[B]

Yeah. So. Oh.

[A]

Or two peas in a pod. You're very relatable, and your. Your content's amazing.

[B]

Oh, my God. Thank you. Well, I love what you're. What you do here.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

It's very relatable and very conversational and fun. And, I mean, girl, whoever writes into this is getting the tea. They are like, the real honest review tea.

[A]

I. I think so. I mean, not to toot my own horn, but, like, I think so.

[B]

No, no, you're good. You're well rounded. You're very, like, I. I'm gonna write in anonymously.

[A]

Oh, there we go. Little throwaway account. All of Gigi's links will be in the description. Go and check her out. I mean, the gram, too. Oh, my God, your gram. Pictures. I'm like, teach me how to fucking pose. So hot. But all in the description. Thank you so much for coming on. That's all I got, guys. Until next time. Bye.

[B]

Update us.

[A]

Update us. Experience the sequel everyone's been waiting for with Sideline 2 intercepted. Join Drayton and Dallas as they navigate the challenges of college life while trying to stay true to themselves and each other. Catch all the drama and watch Sideline 2 Intercepted, starring Noah Beck and Sienna Agudong for free on Tubi this Thanksgiving.

[B]

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