Two Hot Takes – Episode 261: "Phony People" Ft. Ron Funches

Air Date: March 26, 2026
Host: Morgan Absher
Guest: Ron Funches
Theme: Juicy Reddit drama, relationships, family dynamics, neurodivergence, and authenticity

Episode Overview

In this episode, Morgan welcomes comedian, actor, and “Traders” alum Ron Funches to share his infectious positivity (and his love of blankets) while dishing out hot takes on stories pulled from Reddit’s wildest relationship and confession threads. Together, they analyze phony social behavior, discuss complicated family and partner dynamics, and probe what it means to "do the right thing" in morally grey zones. The episode also explores the impact of neurodivergence on communication, how internet fame alters privacy decisions, and the value of honesty—with plenty of wit and relatability throughout.

Key Segments & Takeaways

1. Getting Cozy with Ron Funches

• [01:06–05:02] Morgan and Ron bond over their shared Pisces birthdays and neurodivergent journeys.
  • Ron: "Ron’s a dad mostly... I’ve done a lot of fun things that people recognize.... You probably have seen me, you just didn’t realize that you saw me." [03:09]
  • Both reveal late autism diagnoses and discuss how this influences communication and perceived social awkwardness.
  • Morgan: "A lot of people diagnosed me with all sorts of things in the comments... but it’s just so interesting thinking, like, you’re being perceived one way." [05:09]

2. Story 1: Pretending to Like a Friend’s Husband

[06:31–14:35]

• From r/TrueOffMyChest: Woman "fakes" liking her best friend's husband for years, feeling exhausted by the act.
  • Ron: "You've been staying silent this long, you can't switch up now—they're locked in, you locked in. You picked your role." [09:48]
  • Both highlight that not vibing with a friend’s partner is common and doesn’t make someone a bad friend.
  • Ron: "If I was her, I don’t want you liking my man. I don’t want y’all all buddy buddy... then I’m gonna start side-eyeing." [12:46]
  • Morgan: "We can be okay with that. Find who you like and just stick with your people." [13:13]
  • Key insight: Sometimes phony civility (birthday texts, polite laughs) is the boundary that protects friendships.

3. Story 2: Am I the Asshole for Not Buying In-Laws Souvenirs?

[14:37–22:47]

• From r/AmItheAsshole: OP is excluded from receiving gifts by in-laws, considers reciprocating the coldness during her trip to China.
  • Ron: "The only asshole part is wanting to rub their face in it... The rest of it is—they’re the assholes." [16:26]
  • Both recall the universal pain of exclusion and awkwardness when gifts are dispensed unevenly.
  • Morgan: "Gift giving is... I love letting people know I care about them and feel seen by what I get them." [18:06]
  • Ron: "They already declared war on you... don’t succumb." [18:22]
  • Reddit agrees: not the asshole, husband is problematic for minimizing OP’s feelings.

4. Story 3: Husband’s Jokes Create Family Division

[23:07–35:22]

• From r/relationships: Husband’s mocking “Southern” jokes cause their young son to parrot disrespect toward OP’s Southern family.
  • Ron: "Marriage... is built on love, trust and respect. If he doesn't respect your family... by definition your relationship is designed to fail." [28:02]
  • Morgan: "He's kind of thinking the same things about you... he's indoctrinating [their son]." [29:30]
  • Both agree mockery masquerading as "jokes" is abusive, especially when kids internalize disrespect.
  • Ron (re divorce): "Probably just gotta end it at some point and protect your kids so... you don't ruin the relationship they could have with their grandparents." [28:10]
  • Reddit consensus: emotional alienation is a form of abuse.

5. Story 4: Kids and Social Media Privacy

[35:39–48:17]

• From r/AmItheAsshole: OP photoshops sister-in-law’s kids out of family photos rather than use stickers, causing family drama.
  • Ron: "People like that want to have their cake and eat it too... but you don’t get to tell other people what to do with their pictures." [40:35]
  • Both discuss how kids’ images on social media present complicated boundaries, especially given Ron’s status.
  • Ron: "If my sons decide later they want to, that’s their decision. When people know something you love, they can use it against you." [37:05]
  • Reddit and hosts agree: Respecting a parent's stated boundaries while maintaining your own is valid.

6. Story 5: Both Sisters Pregnant with OP’s Child

[49:03–58:38]

• From r/relationship_advice (and update): Guy sleeps with both his girlfriend and her sister—both allegedly pregnant.
  • Ron’s advice: "Only thing I could give you... start a reality show!" [50:50]
  • Both incredulous. It turns out to be a prank: the sisters know, neither is pregnant; OP gets dumped.
  • Morgan: "I'd be an only child..." [56:24]
  • Ron: "He kind of won... he slept with both of the sisters, got out of the relationship, no child support." [58:12]

7. Rapid Fire/Short Takes

Untrained Dog at Housewarming (w/Lauren)

[61:01–66:51]

• OP bans friend’s untrained dog from new white-carpeted home; friends threaten to end relationship.
  • Lauren: "Even if I had a child…if they peed in every single corner...I would understand if [someone] needed space." [61:59]
  • Consensus: OP is not the asshole; friends are unreasonable for prioritizing their dog over others’ property and comfort.

Secret Family Recipes & Takeout Confession

[67:20–72:18]

• OP struggles with in-law drama because his “famous” lasagna is actually from an Italian deli, not a family recipe.
  • Ron’s solution: "Let her in... build trust and confidence. Have her come with you to the restaurant and eat the lasagna." [70:34]
  • Morgan considers just faking a recipe, but agrees Ron’s way is more honest (and fun).
  • Ron: "When this guy keeps secrets, it’s just lasagna." [72:16]

"Traders" Behind the Scenes / Autism Reflection

[76:48–79:25]

• Ron talks about isolation he experienced on “Traders” and how it led to self-discovery and being diagnosed with autism, allowing him to better relate to his son.
  • Ron: "Even when you’re under stress...this is how you act as a man. This is how you treat people." [81:50]
  • Morgan: "It was just kind of nice because...now with my son...I get it now." [79:26]

8. Story 6: Wedding Disposable Camera Cheating Scandal

[82:19–94:23]

• OP discovers disposable camera photo from sister’s wedding that appears to show the groom kissing another woman.
  • Ron: "Another TikTok trend fucking everybody’s life up." [85:31]
  • Both debate: Tell her now (ruin honeymoon)? Wait until she’s home? Reveal at slideshow?
  • Ron: "Put the photos with the slideshow—you don’t know the context." [86:19]
  • Morgan: "Let her have one nice week in Aruba." [86:09]
  • Consensus: Wait until she’s back; don’t play detective any further. Present the evidence and allow sister to decide.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• [09:48] Ron: "You've been staying silent this long, you can't switch up now—they're locked in. You locked in. You picked your role."
• [16:26] Ron: "The only asshole part is wanting to rub their face in it... The rest of it is—they're the assholes."
• [28:02] Ron: "If he doesn't respect your family and doesn't in return respect your wishes...your relationship is designed to fail."
• [37:05] Ron: "When people know something you love, they can use it against you."
• [50:50] Ron: "Only thing I could give you...start a reality show!"
• [70:34] Ron: "Let her in...build trust and confidence with her."
• [86:19] Ron: "Put the photos with the slideshow..."
• [81:50] Ron: "Even when you're under stress and duress...this is how you act as a man."
• [58:12] Ron: "He kind of won...he slept with both of the sisters, got out of the relationship, no child support."
• [72:16] Ron: "When this guy keeps secrets, it's just lasagna."

Timestamps for Major Segments

• [01:06] Intro, astrological banter, Ron’s background
• [06:31] Story 1: Pretending about a friend's spouse
• [14:37] Story 2: Souvenir snub & emotional labor
• [23:07] Story 3: Jokes as family sabotage
• [35:39] Story 4: Photoshopping kids out of pictures
• [49:03] Story 5: Girlfriend and her sister both pregnant (update at [54:25])
• [61:01] Untrained dog versus white carpet w/Lauren
• [67:20] Secret family recipe / lasagna confession
• [76:48] Reflections on "Traders," autism, empathy
• [82:19] Story 6: Wedding photo mystery
• [94:41] Ron plugs tour, socials; Morgan wraps up

Tone & Style Highlights

• Casual, witty, conversational; plenty of playful banter.
• Warmth and realness; guests and host share personal stories.
• Humor and relatability even when dissecting heavy social dilemmas.
• Respectful but honest hot takes, blending empathy with sharp insight.

Final Thoughts

This episode balances the hilarious absurdities and real emotional complexities of modern interpersonal drama. Through both light-hearted and serious stories, Morgan and Ron encourage authenticity, healthy boundaries, and mutual respect—while also recognizing life is a little easier when you don’t take yourself too seriously.