Enjoy Your Moments

Summary

Podcast Summary: Two Sons and Me — "Enjoy Your Moments"

Host: Todd Chrisley
Guests: Chase and Grayson (Chrisley sons)
Release Date: May 15, 2026

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Overview of the Episode

In this candid, unfiltered episode of Two Sons and Me, Todd Chrisley sits down with his sons, Chase and Grayson, for a lively discussion that swings from charged takes on world events and American cultural debates to deeply personal reflections on family, discipline, parenthood, and the art of finding peace. Equal parts provocative, heartfelt, and humorous, the family pulls no punches as they talk about how the hardest years have changed them, the ongoing process of letting go, and the importance of enjoying the present moment.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Global Events and Unapologetic Opinions

Timestamps: 02:00–10:49

• Middle East War / Iran:
  • The Chrisleys dive straight into the ongoing conflict in Iran. Todd is unapologetically pro-intervention, stating,

    "This war should have happened 45 years ago." (05:10, Todd)

  • The sons are equally blunt:

    "Blow them up, take the oil." (02:25, Unnamed Son)
    "They've had this coming since 9/11." (05:44, Chase Grayson)

• National Division:
  • Todd and the boys criticize American liberals and the media for allegedly siding with Iran:

    "We have so many people...hoping that Iran wins this war. There's no war for them to win. It's over." (04:27, Todd)

  • Todd draws parallels between the current climate and the aftermath of 9/11, expressing zero tolerance for Americans standing with foreign adversaries.

2. U.S. Politics and Culture Wars

Timestamps: 10:49–15:45

• New York & Urban Policy:
  • The conversation turns to New York’s mayor, voter ID laws, and city decline.

    "The city's already bankrupt." (11:06, Chase Grayson)
    "But he requires a birth certificate and ID to shovel snow in the streets of New York." (11:11, Chase Grayson)

  • Todd expresses a nostalgic, yet disappointed, take on how New York has changed.
• Immigration and American Values:
  • The family laments cultures not assimilating:

    "You can't come to this country and expect us to change who we are." (15:33, Todd)

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3. Family Dynamics: Laziest, Busiest, and Most Rebellious

Timestamps: 15:50–18:32

• Who’s the Laziest?
  • Todd and the sons banter about who in the family does (or avoids) chores, particularly taking out the trash:

    "It would be a tie between you and Chloe because both of y'all will walk by the trash can." (16:44, Todd)

• Who’s Busiest?
  • Consensus is that mom (Julie) is the busiest, with Savannah also always doing something.
• Who’s Most Rebellious?
  • The sons joke about pushing back against authority:

    "I'm the most rebellious...I mean, you're gonna do whatever you want to do." (18:02, Unnamed Son)

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4. Favoritism and Disciplinary Dynamics

Timestamps: 18:33–22:24

• Strictness and Gender:
  • Todd is accused of being stricter with boys, perceived as more lenient with the girls.

    "The girls in our family can do no wrong." (18:50, Unnamed Son)

• "Order of Liking":
  • Chase jokes:

    "Savannah, me, Chloe, you." (19:19, Chase Grayson)

  • Todd insists he loves all equally, but admits, "I don't like all of you the same at various times..." (19:43, Todd)

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5. Growing Pains: Discipline, Control, and Change

Timestamps: 22:25–26:05

• The boys reflect on pushing back against discipline, and Todd unpacks the blurry line between discipline and control.

  "You're my dad, you know. Like, I'm not signing you up for those problems. It's my job to handle that." (27:55, Unnamed Son)

• Grayson discusses being homeschooled and how the lack of the traditional high-school experience led to more excitement for college.

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6. Letting Go: Parenting Adult Children

Timestamps: 26:06–44:00

• Worry & Boundaries:
  • Todd shares a revelation about not carrying his children's problems as his own:

    "You have to love them and say, go with God...But y'all don't listen. So the only way...they come from the Show Me State." (26:53, Todd)

• Adult Kids at Home:
  • Discusses the realities and emotional lines drawn when children move back home as adults; Todd jokes about wanting privacy with Julie:

    "We might want to screw on the dining room table...in the privacy of our own home." (31:34, Todd)

• Changing Parent-Child Relationship:
  • Todd admits the relationship with his children has evolved:

    "I see y'all as young adults…I have had a wonderful, glorious experience in having a small part of y'all being where you are." (50:33, Todd)

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7. Finding Peace and Personal Growth

Timestamps: 44:00–54:57

• Materialism vs. Meaning:

  • The sons and Todd discuss how personal values have shifted, favoring inner peace and spiritual growth over material goals.

    "My life's become less materialistic...those are not the most important thing in my life anymore." (46:30, Unnamed Son)

  • Todd credits his faith and hardships (including a 28-month absence from his family) with giving him new perspective and compassion.

    "When you surrender all, you give up the stress of having to try to be right." (52:58, Todd)

• Enjoying the Moment:

  • Todd's advice echoes the title theme:

    "Enjoy your moment. Enjoy your moments. Because those are fleeting." (53:29, Todd)

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8. Reflections on Parenting, Change, and Joy

Timestamps: 54:58–End

• Grayson’s College Years:

  • Importance of appreciating experience, recognizing growth from being around adults, and not taking things for granted.

    "I love it down there…I've been given this safe place within The University of Alabama to grow, to be nurtured and to be made to feel safe." (54:18, Todd)

• Final Reflections:

  • Todd reflects on how he’s more interested in his kids’ stories and well-being, rather than trying to control their choices.
  • He sums up with a simple, hard-earned truth:

    "You get to a place in life to where you have to start looking at what is the thing that brings you joy and then trying to figure out how to build around that." (40:01, Todd)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote/Highlight | |-----------|---------|-----------------| | 05:10 | Todd | "This war should have happened 45 years ago." | | 11:11 | Chase Grayson | "So we don't believe in voter id. You don't need an ID to vote, but he requires a birth certificate and ID to shovel snow in the streets of New York." | | 19:19 | Chase Grayson | "Savannah, me, Chloe, you." (joking about Todd's favorite child order) | | 26:53 | Todd | "You have to love them and say, go with God...But y'all don't listen. So the only way...they come from the Show Me State." | | 31:34 | Todd | "We might want to screw on the dining room table...in the privacy of our own home." | | 46:30 | Unnamed Son | "My life's become less materialistic...those are not the most important thing in my life anymore." | | 52:58 | Todd | "When you surrender all, you give up the stress of having to try to be right." | | 53:29 | Todd | "Enjoy your moment. Enjoy your moments. Because those are fleeting." |

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Episode Flow and Tone

This episode oscillates between irreverent, barbed humor and moments of heartfelt vulnerability. Todd delivers punchlines, hard truths, and parental wisdom in equal measure, while the sons riff with sibling sarcasm, eye-rolling realism, and a candid affection that cuts through the bravado.

Listeners looking for a sanitized family sit-down won’t find it here. The Chrisleys speak their minds—with all the unfiltered, sometimes controversial opinions and familial digs their fans have come to expect—but the episode ultimately lands on a message about growth, surrender, and cherishing the fleeting joys of family and the present.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Todd]

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[Todd]

Welcome to Two Sons and Me. I'm Todd.

[Chase Grayson]

I'm Chase Grayson.

[Todd]

Welcome back. So how are you guys doing? Good, good, good. What's new in your life?

[Chase Grayson]

Not much. Just trying to live it.

[Todd]

Trying to live it. I think that's what everyone is trying to do right now.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah.

[Todd]

What about you?

[Unnamed Son]

Trying to survive it. Mmm. Okay.

[Todd]

Well, a lot of people doing that too. A lot of people doing that too. So let's talk about current events for a moment. Where are you on the war in Iran?

[Chase Grayson]

It was bound to happen eventually.

[Todd]

Okay, so you think it was the right move?

[Chase Grayson]

They can't keep getting away with that shit.

[Todd]

Okay.

[Chase Grayson]

They, like, execute people in the street, right? Like tens of thousands of people. Olympic wrestler was 19 years old and they killed him.

[Todd]

Yep. What about you?

[Unnamed Son]

Blow them up, Take the oil.

[Chase Grayson]

Hell yeah.

[Unnamed Son]

America should not say that.

[Chase Grayson]

No, you should.

[Todd]

What did you say?

[Unnamed Son]

Up and take the oil well, I

[Todd]

mean, that's basically what we've done.

[Chase Grayson]

That's basically what we're going to do.

[Todd]

You know, I have a lot of people that message me on dms. They're like, you know, you state your family stands for this, your family stands for that. Where do you stand on this war? And I've talked about that on Chrisley Confessions that this war should have happened 45 years ago. I find it ironic that President Trump is getting such shit for doing something that Bush said needed to be done, Reagan said needed to be done, Clinton said it needed to be done, Obama said it needed to be done, Biden, well, somebody pulled Biden's string to get him to lip it that he needed to be done. But do I think that it should have happened? Yeah, it should have happened 45 years ago. You do. We have friends that are, that are from there and that are in television and they're celebrating that this is happening.

[Chase Grayson]

There's people in the street celebrating that.

[Unnamed Son]

They.

[Todd]

Yeah, and our friends that, that again, who runs one of the biggest production houses in la, said to me that she has family still there, that the Internet is very sketchy right now, whatever, and that she prays for her cousins every day, but that they hope that President Trump does not pull out of there because it's come this far and that the country wants to be liberated. So, you know, if you're asking where I stand, we should have done this 45 years ago. And I hope that we finish it. I hope that we have not gone over there and spent $25 billion to not finish the job.

[Chase Grayson]

You know, Iran's the largest state funder of terrorism in the world.

[Todd]

Yeah. And the irony of this is that we have so many people in this country that are, that are liberals that are literally hoping that Iran wins this war. There's no war for them to win. It's over. For all intents and purposes, over.

[Chase Grayson]

It was over after the first week.

[Todd]

And, you know, you have these, these news outlets, you know, that are. That swing way left that are like, you know, it's not good. You know, we're losing this war. And you have people from Congress coming on there saying that stupid shit, and, and they're pandering to people that just don't have enough education of the facts to where they think they can get by with that. Because you can't say we're losing the war when we have abolished their navy, all of their fleet of ships is sitting at the bottom of the ocean. We've taken control of all of the oil. We blew the head wrap off of the Ayatollah. So, I mean, at the end of the day, I wouldn't say that we have lost anything. I would say that we have won. You came here to our country, you destroy or contributed to destroying American with 9 11, and you want me to feel sorry for this that has come home to roost for you?

[Unnamed Son]

No.

[Chase Grayson]

They've had this coming since 9 11.

[Unnamed Son]

We're just, we're getting our back.

[Todd]

If that had happened when 911 happened and I had my hand on the button, I would have created a sandstorm over there. We wouldn't have, we wouldn't have needed Trump to come in because I would have created the biggest sandstorm that hit that, that they had, the Middle east had ever seen. So if you wonder where we stand, we, we are for this war. We are just also very, very committed to. If you have sent our, our men and women over there, let them finish what they were sent over there for. I'm not about all this back and forth negotiating bullshit because it's too far past. We've been gone. We've been going back and forth with these negotiations. You don't have shit to negotiate, bro. You're done.

[Chase Grayson]

They have no ground to stand on.

[Todd]

No. And I'll tell you something else. Now, you know that I love Spanish food and I love all of my brothers and sisters that are of Spanish descent, but when Spain said we couldn't use them, damn those air, those airstrips, brother. You go fight Putin because we don't need to send our people over there to fight to save your ass. You need to let Putin save you or take over for you. So I'm a little bit. I think that, you know, it's talking about when, when people in our, in our episode that we've already shot, on another episode, we talked about how people show you who they are. This war has shown our country who is there for us.

[Chase Grayson]

People. People are literally trying to defend a country that chants every day, death to America, and burns our flag.

[Todd]

And you want to burn our flag, but yet you want to come to this country and hide under that flag. Yeah, that don't rise with me. I think that when you've got countries like Spain and Italy, and as much as I love the UK because I. We all can agree, we all love London and I love England as a whole. I love the people in England. But when you start looking at when, when Starmer said, no, you can't use the airstrips, well, he is Far he's extremely liberal. And you look at the population, the Muslim population that is basically over overtaking London proper, and you're sitting here saying, we can't use airstrips. Without us, the castles will crumble. So then he wants to turn around and start being best friends again. Y' all know y' all have had them like that. Y' all have had friends that talk behind your back and then they got in your face and granted they back friends with you again.

[Chase Grayson]

Speaking of England, they were holding a thing to protest against us, said, no kings. Do they not realize they're one of the only countries left that have a king?

[Todd]

Exactly, exactly.

[Unnamed Son]

And I want to be a king.

[Todd]

Well, I mean, you know, in your own mind you can be.

[Unnamed Son]

In my own mind, I am.

[Todd]

Well, then there you go then. When 911 happened now, okay, there's. There's people out there that's going to say, well, Iran didn't do that. Yeah, they contributed to that. All of the funding that was going on over there was funneled back here for these rejects to come over here and do what they did to our American citizens. So, you know, before y' all start coming in my comments and saying, let it go. No, I'm never letting 911 go. You say that to those kids who grew up with no mom and daddy. You say that to wives who don't have their husbands anymore or husbands who lost their wives or to parents who lost their sons and daughters. You tell them to give it up. But my thing is, is that if you as an American citizen, if you are fighting for someone else's political beliefs from another country, move there. Move the hell over there. We're not stopping you. But if you got your shit going on over there in another country and we don't abide by that, don't come here with it. If you come to this country, you should be saying, I'm embracing your values. I'm embracing what this country was built on. Not, we're going to come to your country and we're going to rebuild it in the likeness of us. Nah, if we wanted that, we'd come and stay in your country. So that's just kind of where I feel about it. So now I've said what I'm going to say about that. So what do you guys want to talk about today?

[Unnamed Son]

Let's stop acting like we have a choice in this.

[Todd]

Okay. Well, you really don't. I do.

[Chase Grayson]

One thing I do love seeing is I do. I love watching people, like, run on shit that they can't do. And then watching it pan out, being like, huh, I told all y', all, like, New York, the city's already bankrupt.

[Todd]

When you've got my. You've got Mom. Dahmer, I gotta tell you something.

[Chase Grayson]

So we don't believe in voter id. You don't need an ID to vote, but he requires a birth certificate and a ID to shovel snow in the

[Todd]

streets of New York.

[Chase Grayson]

But you don't need it to vote in the election.

[Todd]

Well, I think that what you're seeing in the diabolical. It's. It's. It really.

[Chase Grayson]

Is it really photographed with, like, known people that are affiliated with, like, terrorist organizations.

[Todd]

He. One of his members of his cabinet there. And if it's his cabinet, his staff there in. In City hall represented the al Qaeda terrorist with the 9 11.

[Chase Grayson]

That's ridiculous.

[Todd]

And they're now. He's now the head of his legal department.

[Chase Grayson]

That guy has to be one of the dumbest.

[Todd]

No, he's not dumb.

[Unnamed Son]

He's not dumb.

[Todd]

He's not dumb. He's very calculating, and he wants to turn New York City into his own.

[Chase Grayson]

Culturally bankrupted the city.

[Todd]

The trouble. The city was in trouble before he got there. But he's literally taking it.

[Chase Grayson]

He pushed it. He didn't push it over the edge. He kicked it over.

[Todd]

And you know, and that cockeyed Kathy Hochul up there who literally, if you don't like our policies, leave. Everybody's leaving. Now she's having to come back on television saying, where we need to start is going to Palm beach and bring all of our billionaires back to New York. Nuh cockeyed Kathy. They not coming back. They have found the promised land in Florida.

[Chase Grayson]

Do you see that company just pulled $6 billion?

[Todd]

It's gonna be more than that. I was on a call last week with some financial stuff that we're doing

[Unnamed Son]

and Goldman Sachs and moving to Texas.

[Todd]

Yes, they're all getting out. And I loved New York, and I loved the people of New York.

[Chase Grayson]

I never loved New York. They can have it. I don't want it.

[Todd]

I did. I loved New York. I remember going there when I was young with my cousins and who lived there. And Central park was always wonderful. And it was. I always felt like the city was alive and vibrant and everything was exciting. And I was just there four months ago, and it was so much dirtier than I remember.

[Chase Grayson]

That's awful.

[Todd]

The trash was piled up. The people were not as friendly as they used to be because they're tired of the shit that they're Having to deal with that makes you bitter. Now at McDonald's, wake up to a $4 breakfast meal deal. Wake up to a sausage McMuffin or a sausage Biscu to hash browns and wake up to a hot coffee. Get your $4 breakfast meal deal. Limited time only. Prices and participation may vary. Prices may be higher for delivery. DISH has been connecting communities like yours for the last 45 years, providing the TV you love at a price you can trust. Watch live sports news and the latest movies, plus your favorite streaming apps all in one place. Switch to DISH today and lock in the lowest price in satellite TV starting at 89.99amonth with our two year price guarantee. Call 888-@dish or visit dish.com today. But I think when you get someone like Kathy Hochul and Mom Dummy and you get all that extreme leftism because, listen, I'm not all the way to the right and I ain't even close to being to the left, but I do swing and hang right there in the middle. And I love the cultural aspect of so many cultures coming together and learning from each other and whatever. I like that. But not for you to come take over. No. We welcomed you here.

[Chase Grayson]

What's that thing he plays on the speakers? And what's it time when they're, when

[Todd]

they have their worship service? Yeah, yeah. And then I'm just not going to go there because it's going to piss me off even more. But I just feel like that where we are in our country right now, it's such a divide. But for the last, really about four weeks, I have felt like there's something big that's going to happen that's going to start bringing us back to the middle. I think there's something that's going to happen that's going to be good because God doesn't want us all to be divided like this. And at the end of the day, no matter what your culture is, you have a heart, you bleed, you breathe to live. And I do believe that most people want a good life for their children. And I believe as the largest nation on Earth, that we have that ability to afford people to have that. But you can't come to this country and expect us to change who we are to accommodate who you have, who you are.

[Chase Grayson]

Why do you want to change it into what you left?

[Todd]

Exactly?

[Chase Grayson]

You left for a reason.

[Todd]

That's exactly right. That's exactly right. So, you know, I wanted to ask some questions because people do ask me this stuff all the time about you or you or whatever. Child is, you know, in the tabloids at the time. Out of. Out of all of our children, out of all of this family, who do you think is the laziest family member? Who do you think?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't give a. Y' all don't know what I do behind the scenes.

[Todd]

You think Chase is laziest?

[Chase Grayson]

I am.

[Todd]

Who do you think's the laziest?

[Chase Grayson]

I mean, when it comes to, like, doing during the day, like, on the gym, doing stuff like that, who do

[Todd]

you think's the laziest?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't know.

[Todd]

You don't have an opinion?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't.

[Todd]

I think it would be a tie between you and Chloe because both of y' all will walk by the trash can. Huh. Chloe's pretty lazy. Yeah. You think? She literally said the other day, melts on that couch. Yeah. 100 times.

[Chase Grayson]

She wakes up sometimes she goes.

[Todd]

She comes in trash can be running over and literally go over there and see that the trash is full and set her trash on the countertop above the trash.

[Chase Grayson]

Now I'll take the trash out, and she'll look at the trash can and won't put another trash bag in it. Just walk past.

[Todd]

It's the crate. It's the craziest shit. Who do you think is the busiest in the family? The person that's doing the most.

[Unnamed Son]

Mama.

[Chase Grayson]

Their mama, Savannah. Sven's always doing something. She's always somewhere doing something.

[Todd]

Yeah, I'd say your mom. Yeah, I'd say your mom is probably the busiest because she's, like, literally doing a million different things. I'd say I'm probably right there with Savannah. With your mama, then. Savannah. So out of the family, who do you think is the most rebellious? Yeah, I'm the most rebellious. Oh, my God.

[Unnamed Son]

You don't give a. About any. Anything. I mean, you're gonna do whatever you want to do.

[Todd]

Nothing. You don't think you're rebellious?

[Chase Grayson]

I mean, I feel like I don't care in the same way. You don't care. You don't feel like you're gonna go do, like, stupid?

[Unnamed Son]

Not any. Not anymore.

[Todd]

Okay. Okay.

[Unnamed Son]

I definitely think I used to be extremely rebellious, though. I got tired of hitting my head against the wall, though.

[Todd]

So do you think that I am stricter on the boys or the girls?

[Unnamed Son]

The boys. Boys, for sure.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah.

[Todd]

And you think that why?

[Chase Grayson]

I don't know. I feel like it's just a given. She's a girl. You're not gonna.

[Unnamed Son]

The girls in our family can do no wrong.

[Todd]

That's not true. They've done plenty of wrong.

[Unnamed Son]

I know they have. But I'm saying in your eyes, you'll make an excuse for why it happened.

[Chase Grayson]

But I think it's just because it's a girl. Like you're obviously gonna treat it.

[Todd]

Well. I do think that from.

[Unnamed Son]

He loves them more.

[Todd]

I don't. I don't.

[Unnamed Son]

Okay, let me ask you this, Grayson. Who do you think. Dad, from top to bottom, who do you think he loves the most to the least?

[Chase Grayson]

Savannah, me. Chloe, you.

[Unnamed Son]

I agree.

[Todd]

Well, that's actually not the lineup.

[Unnamed Son]

That's what everyone thinks.

[Todd]

Okay.

[Chase Grayson]

No, I think love. I think he loves all of us the same. Likes.

[Unnamed Son]

I don't think so.

[Chase Grayson]

Is Savannah, me, Chloe, you.

[Todd]

It's just. It's like that's the same craziest thing.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah, I said he loves all of

[Todd]

us the same, but he. If you're talking about an order of which he likes. I don't. That's. Well, that varies based on whatever stupid act the individual has done at that time. But as far as my love goes, my love is no different. My love is as deep for one of you as it is the rest of you. I don't like all of you the same at various times, but you're still mine. So I have to look at it and say, God, I'm asking you to give me the strength to just go one more day and hope for a miracle.

[Unnamed Son]

I want you to know we pray that same prayer about prayer about you.

[Todd]

Well, he has answered it because you have been given an excellent father and an excellent mother. So he has answered your prayers. Ain't nobody going to rain on what I know I've been.

[Unnamed Son]

No one said you haven't.

[Todd]

So why do you think that you have pushed back on discipline so much rules, discipline, advice. Why do you think that you have literally just pushed back on all of it?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't think I have.

[Todd]

Oh, my God.

[Unnamed Son]

I think. I think that everybody makes mistakes for sure.

[Todd]

Well, we're not talking about mistakes. Why do you. Why do you push against authority?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't. That's rich.

[Todd]

Why do you push against authority?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't. Who's the authority over me?

[Todd]

God.

[Unnamed Son]

No, you're not.

[Todd]

Say. There he goes again, doing it right here on camera.

[Unnamed Son]

I'm 30 years old. You're not my authority.

[Todd]

I don't care. 30, 60. You know what I'm going to be when you 80?

[Unnamed Son]

Dead. Dead is.

[Todd]

Just remember that I will have an afterlife.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah, I have no doubt. You will be a cockroach.

[Todd]

You will literally be walking down the sidewalk, and you will trip and fall, and it will be me that did it. Just remember that.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah. And if I die before you, you'll never take a hot shower again.

[Todd]

Grayson.

[Unnamed Son]

I'll turn the lights on when you go to bed.

[Todd]

Do you think that you have been given more freedom than your siblings or less?

[Chase Grayson]

Thinking away both.

[Unnamed Son]

I. I don't know. I think I feel like I was

[Chase Grayson]

allowed to do certain shit.

[Unnamed Son]

Done a better job of, like, letting you go and do things. And with me, I kind of just. I was.

[Chase Grayson]

I. I just feel like certain things I wasn't allowed to do because of

[Todd]

them, because they had screwed up.

[Chase Grayson]

Like, it already made me look guilty before I even did anything, because of past stuff.

[Todd]

Well, I think as a parent, the only thing you have to go off of is I know that what has happened before.

[Chase Grayson]

But that's what I mean. Like, that's why I said both kind of no and yes.

[Todd]

I was in Dallas, and this couple comes over to me, and he's probably 30, and he goes, yeah, I met your daughter Savannah, he says, in Tipton, Georgia, he said, when she snuck out of her house one night to go and watch Blair perform, I said, oh, really?

[Unnamed Son]

Okay.

[Todd]

That's what's. Nice to meet you. So, folks, I'm still finding out all

[Unnamed Son]

of my shit's out there.

[Todd]

No, it ain't all out there.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah, it is. You know everything.

[Todd]

No, I. This. I don't want to know.

[Unnamed Son]

You genuinely know everything.

[Chase Grayson]

In high school, I didn't really do anything.

[Todd]

You was at home.

[Chase Grayson]

Exactly. But I didn't. Like, most kids go to high school parties and stuff like that. Like, I didn't do that. No, I was just at home all the time. All I did was play sports.

[Todd]

And you stayed out of trouble. So, folks, that is an. That right there is an ad for homeschooling, because. Do you feel like that you. Do you feel like that your homeschooling made you more prepared for your academic career in college?

[Chase Grayson]

I don't know. I mean, maybe a little. Just because it's. Most of it's online.

[Unnamed Son]

Do you think that being at home and not experiencing that in high school, it's made you want to go and experience it more in college?

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah, for sure. Let's shelter our kids. Old shoulder or kids, and when they get out, they act like idiots.

[Unnamed Son]

That worked.

[Todd]

He don't act like that. Well, I did, clearly. And you went to a. You went to a private Christian school. What's that say?

[Unnamed Son]

Christian's cause, too.

[Todd]

You need to stop. So where do you say that? I mean, what is the distance between discipline and control for you?

[Unnamed Son]

I mean, I don't think you get disciplined. Like, what do you mean? Like, how?

[Todd]

Like, you. I think that you view discipline as control.

[Unnamed Son]

Well, I mean, I don't. I think at certain point in your life, like, you're. You're not going to be. You don't get disciplined by people, like, and no one has control over you. It's like, your job to have accountability and hold, like, have discipline to make the right decisions.

[Todd]

And what areas has your view changed towards life in general? And when did that happen?

[Unnamed Son]

I think, like, whenever you guys went away, I was, like, in a really dark place. But now that I'm like. I mean, I'm doing great right now, like, from an emotional standpoint. And I don't know. I think that every day is a gift and, like, tomorrow's not promised. So I think that I've definitely grown to be more compassionate and understanding and kind of just like, I don't know everything, and I'm okay with that. I don't have the answers to everything, and that's okay. But, like, whatever obstacles come, like, like, we're going to get through them.

[Todd]

You know, I read a thing that said that 95% of everything that we fear never. Never happens.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah.

[Todd]

But yet we spent 95% of our time worrying about what if that happened.

[Unnamed Son]

And I think that's something I have to work on, too, because I definitely worry about a lot.

[Todd]

I had. I mean, I've worried my whole life. But I will say that I don't sweat things like I used to. I don't worry about. Nope. I don't worry about things that I have no control over. I don't. And also, you know, I was saying this to my. My friend Terrence the other day that we invite into our lives a lot of the problems that we have because we take on things that are not that we don't have an involvement in or that we don't fully understand. You know, like when you have a friend that comes, you know, to your house or calls you on the phone, and they start giving you all their problems, and most of the time, you can't do anything to fix them anyway. Yeah, you can sit and listen, but a lot of people internalize what people say to them, and they carry it. I was one of those people for my whole life. I don't do that. I. I try not to do that anymore because, like, your problems ain't gonna be my problems. Your problems ain't Gonna be my problems. Mine ain't gonna be yours. Everyone's my problems are your problems. No, they're not. No, they're not. I believe that when you. When your kids get grown and they go out here and they do things, you're grown, you're soon to be 20. That as a parent, you have to. You have to love them and you have to say, go with God, speak. And doesn't mean that I don't love you, because my love is always there for you. But y' all don't listen. So the only way that for my kids to learn, they come from the Show Me state, they have to be able to see it, touch it, feel it. So those problems can't be my problems. I have to love you through those problems. But you created.

[Unnamed Son]

But not, like, for me. Like, I'm not ask. I'm not. I don't want my problems to be your problems. Like, if I had. If I'm going through something or have a problem, like, and I talk to you about it, it's just because I know that, like, I. You're my dad. Like, you're my dad, you know, Like, I'm not. I'm not signing you up for those problems. Like, it's my. It's my job to handle that.

[Todd]

Right? That's. Well, that's right.

[Unnamed Son]

But to have, like, a conversation and be like, okay, if I want to do this or I want to do this and get your opinion on it, like, you don't have to be emotionally attached to that.

[Todd]

Oh, that I don't have to be much. Right? Yeah, you're probably right on that. What is your thoughts like? Like, when you come to me for advice? Because I tell you quite often, son, that's your decision. You have to. You have to live with the consequences of it. Do you feel like that that's me shocking my responsibility to you, or do you feel like that's me allowing you to go and do and learn on your own?

[Chase Grayson]

I don't know. I don't really feel like it's either. Like, I feel like if I ask you for your opinion and you say, well, that's your decision. I didn't ask you if it was my decision. I asked for your opinion on it.

[Todd]

But I normally will give you my opinion. But then I say, but you're going to do what you're going to do,

[Chase Grayson]

you know, we're going to do what we're going to do anyway.

[Todd]

Right. So for me, I just feel like that I have this whole new approach in my life. For me and folks, this is the first time in my life that I have ever made a determination that I'm going these next 20 years that I have, if I have those, you know, my dad died at 78, so I'm 58 now. So if God gives me that much longer, that's 20 years. Those I have given. I can remember from the time that I was in kindergarten, always worrying about somebody else, whether it was my brother or my mother or is my mother gonna come back, come home from work, you know, did something happen to her in a car wreck? I've always worried about everything. I'm not doing that for the next 20 years. I'm going to live my life based off of what I want to do and what brings me and Julie peace. And I want my kids to do well. But y' all are gonna have to figure it out on your own. Ultimately, at the end of the day, you got to figure your own life out. And whatever problems y' all create, they don't get to become mine and your mother's problems. We get to say, I love you. I probably wouldn't have handled that situation that way. But you've done it. It's here. You got to figure out how to clean it up. But I'm not going to sign up for the cleanup crate. I'm not doing that anymore. But I think that I read. I read yesterday an article, and it was talking about that today more adult children live with their parents. That these are adult children that are 40 living with their adult parents. It's the highest rate in the history of our country. Now, a lot of that has to do with homes are more today than they have ever been historically.

[Unnamed Son]

Mm.

[Todd]

The demand is higher and the supply is much lower. And so these adult kids have gone out here renting apartments, you know, trying to save money to get a home that's now out of reach. So they move back into the. On their parents to where they can save money. Well, I mean, ultimately, is that fair to the parent?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't know. I. I would let my kid live with me forever.

[Todd]

Well, I mean, I love all y', all, but I don't want y' all living with forever. Your mother and I, we might want to run buck ass naked through our house. We might want to screw on the dining room table. We might want to, you know, do whatever, and we'd like to do that in the privacy of our own home. So, no, I don't want none of y' all leaving me forever, but you

[Unnamed Son]

don't have to Worry about that.

[Todd]

Oh, I think I do, because all y' all keep coming home, but I love to see y' all come. But I want you in your own place. I want you having your own home and being able. When we finish dinner, we've had a good. A nice conversation. We've had a nice meal. Love you. See you tomorrow. I want that. Does that make sense?

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah.

[Todd]

I mean, do you feel that? Do you feel the same way? Like, we just had this conversation me and your mother did weeks ago. Where. No, I had it with you, too. When we were looking. Your mother and I were looking at homes there, and I said, your mom doesn't feel like that we need to buy as big a house because all of our kids are grown now. And you panicked over that. You're like, no, I don't. I have to have stupid. Because you're like, I need to have a room when I want to come home.

[Chase Grayson]

Well, yeah, because I don't have a room right now. And I've stayed at Savannah's house, so that's why I'm like, yeah, there needs to be a room.

[Unnamed Son]

But I think it's also different because you don't. Like, you're in school.

[Chase Grayson]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Todd]

But I think that at the end of the day, it comes down to everyone gets to a place in their life to where they want their own thing, and a parent doesn't want. Regardless of what we say as parents, yes, we're a parent for a lifetime. But that doesn't mean that we want to keep parenting. It means that we want to be able to look in the mirror at some point and say, huh, I got through that. I survived that. Because now, for all intents and purposes, all of my children are adults.

[Chase Grayson]

You other parents until the day you die.

[Todd]

Other than. Other than Chloe, all of my kids are adults.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah.

[Todd]

So, you know, I just feel like that there is a time and a place to where. And I used to never think this. I'd get so fighting mad over it when people would say, your relationship will change with your children. The relationship will change with your children. And I say, no, my relationship's not going to change. They're still my children. I'm the parent. That's the way it's going to be. But it really has changed. It really has changed. Like, I was with your sister in California this past. This week, and I looked at her as she was walking towards me, and I thought, she's grown. She really is not my baby anymore. She is a grown adult woman. And there was a part of me that was sad that that was not there anymore. But there was a bigger part of me that was like, yeah, we did what we were supposed to do. This is how it works. You have a baby, you raise them, they turn into toddlers and then to preschool and then high school and then college. And you want to see them mature and grow. And you still want to be that person when they have a wonderful time in their life or a moment that's worth talking about. You want them to call you and share that with you, and you want to still share your life with them. But I think that, that for me, what has happened for me is that the ages of 20 to kind of where y' all are now has been my hardest years. They have not been my easy years with y'.

[Chase Grayson]

All.

[Unnamed Son]

I don't think they've been easy years for us either.

[Todd]

They have not been my easy years. Now yours has. Yours has really relatively been. You have been an easy child. But I think that, you know, again, when you said. When you say, yeah, it hadn't been for any of us, if you really look at the timeline and the trajectory of it, all of our drama really started in 2012.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah.

[Todd]

So it's now 2026. So 14 years. We had to deal with all the lies and the cheating and thieving and all the shit that happened to us. And everyone processes things differently. Because I read all the time, and I read where this therapist said the other day about the mother had been sick and then a brother, she was battling an illness and then her youngest child had gotten sick and he was rushed into the hospital and he survived. But he said to his mother, when he came out of the coma, he said, I had to go through this so you would know how to. So you would know how to navigate your illness. And I thought, wow, and this is an 8 year old little boy. Yeah. But he had been carrying that stress inside of him that his mother may die. And then he had to go through this. And he said to his mom, but I had to go through this in order for you to be able to navigate your way through what you're going to go through. That's an eight year old. That's God speaking through that child. I think that out of everything that's gone on in our life, I've learned so much. I've learned so much and I've grown so much. I would have never grown to the level that I've grown had I not gone through what I've gone through and I improved. That growth happens at all phases of someone's life and at all age groups. I am proof of that. I want to be in a place with my children, to where I'm sitting on the sidelines cheering you on, being your biggest supporter, being your fan. But I don't want to be that person that you feel like you can always come to me and just dump all your shit on me and then walk away. Because now, oh, you feel better, but I don't. You've left me with all. You've burdened me with all of your issues, and you're like, God, it felt so good getting that off my chest. Well, glad that it felt better for you, because I don't feel better for it. So I think that we have to. Your mother and I was talking yesterday, and she's talking about peace. And I said, but we're responsible for our own peace. We get to control what we allow into our life, what disturbs our peace and what prevents us from having peace. And I kind of. I'm not certainly where I need to be, but I'm certainly better than what I was on, navigating what is a peaceful existence for me.

[Unnamed Son]

I think that, like, it's like, at the end of the day, I think a lot of people live trying to make other people happy.

[Todd]

Yeah. My whole life I've done it.

[Unnamed Son]

And I think that the moment that you can just. You can actually sit down and just think about yourself and what's going to make you happy, that's what you have to do. Because if you live your life trying to make other people happy, it. You're never going to do that. You're never going to make everybody happy, and you're going to cheat yourself out of that time.

[Todd]

I. I agree.

[Unnamed Son]

And cheat yourself out of happiness.

[Todd]

I agree. I agree with that 100%. I think that people look at what, if you love me, you will do this. If you loved me, you would see it my way. And that's not love. That's not love. That's you using something emotionally to try to force this person to feel that way. And if you are truly on a journey to where you're like, okay, I am. I'm going to find my own peace. I'm going to find what makes me happy, and I'm going to do that. Then it really. It's not even about being defiant at that point. It's about just like dropping your hands and surrendering. Yeah, you literally, just for me, that's what it's been. I have surrendered. I have surrendered everything that was. That was kind of holding me back in my life. I have surrendered and given it to God. And every. Everything that happens in life happens for a reason. Now, we as humans don't always understand what those reasons are, but everything happens for a reason, and not all those reasons are good. A lot of times when things happen and you're like, okay, this is not going to be that bad, it ends up being way worse because of the heartache that comes along with that. And then other times you're like, wow, wow. I would have never thought that this was going to turn into this, because I've had those moments. I've had small things that I was looking at, like, yeah, it was nice, but it wasn't the greatest things ever happened in my life. And then turn around six months later and you're like, wow, that one little kernel here manifested into this whole thing that's turned into something great over here. So I think that you get to a place in life to where you have to start looking at what is the thing that brings you Joey. And then trying to figure out how to build around that and. And to create that safety net of being at peace. And you don't have to live near me to find peace. You don't have to live with me to find peace. I don't have to be around y' all every day anymore in order for me to have peace. I enjoy my time with your mother. I enjoy when it's just me and her. I enjoy when she and I can go out to dinner and we can have conversations. And that's not about y', all, it's about us. I enjoy that. But I also thoroughly enjoy seeing y' all come home sitting down as having a meal together of you knowing that I love you. But we're all adults now. And that. That with being all adults, we all have to learn proper boundaries. And we talked about that in another episode. I am at a place to where I don't know if. I don't know if I'm at a place where I say I can respect boundaries because I don't know that I'm going to get there. But I can say that I'm at a place to where I really care less about a lot of shit that I would have cared way more about years ago. Does that make sense? Like, I don't really give a shit who you're dating right now. Now, I mean, that's great that you're. You're dating someone. Love that. Don't really give a shit who you're dating. Right now, if it's working for you, God bless you, go do it. Just don't bring me no bullshit, don't bring me no problems because I didn't date them. So, you know, I want y' all to have an experience in your life to where as a, as young men, maybe not so much you, because you're now aging out of that category. You're soon to be 30.

[Unnamed Son]

30 is a young man

[Todd]

at 30. I had four children, worked non stop. You're still living your generation. Let's talk about that for a second. Your generation does not believe that 30 is that big a deal. But 30 over life expectancy of a man, you're almost literally add five years to it. You've lived half of your life expectancy because life expectancy for a man is 70. So really, if you don't have your together by 35, you're now spending your next the 35 years at what medical

[Unnamed Son]

science comes and hits you. We got hit really hard.

[Todd]

I think I said we got, we

[Chase Grayson]

got advances and medicine.

[Todd]

Yeah, it was a clip I saw yesterday where you do. You said that on another podcast with me. So trust me, I know life hits you hard. I got ran over.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah, we got, we got rocked. So like, like if, if that wouldn't have happened, sure I would be professionally or further along than where I am right now. But I mean, like, I learned valuable lessons and I'll do things.

[Todd]

Nothing was wasted. Everything that you go through, I don't

[Unnamed Son]

have four kids yet, but everything that

[Todd]

you go through that God allows you to survive, he allowed you to survive it in order to prep you for what's coming next and on how you're going to get through it. And I believe that what happened to us has given me more strength than I've ever had in my life because I literally.

[Chase Grayson]

Well, I've even said, I just don't

[Unnamed Son]

view like going through what we went through, like any problem that started me now I'm like, okay, okay, that's really not that big of a deal. Like, like you, there's like, I feel like I've, that's what made me realize like the different levels of like pain and how bad things can actually get. Like the everyday problems. I'm like, those are not even problems

[Todd]

and they're normally going to work themselves out. Yeah, like those kind of things normally work themselves out. And I feel like that, you know, because you said, you know, life is, you know, you're not promised tomorrow. And that is, I mean, that is true. We're not promised Tomorrow. But we can try to control what our tomorrows look like. We can say, okay, tomorrow I'm going to. This is what I'd like to see happen. And a lot of times those things don't happen.

[Unnamed Son]

How do you think for you? Because, like, I know for me, like, my priorities were, okay, I need to. I want to make this. I want to go get this, I want to buy this, that. And now, like. Like, I want to wake up and like, just. I want to be a better man than I was yesterday on my relationship with God to grow deeper than it was yesterday. And my level of accountability and holding myself to higher standards is higher today than it was yesterday.

[Todd]

If you stay on that, on that path, and those are true to the things that you're looking to achieve, you will achieve them. You will achieve them. What has changed for me?

[Unnamed Son]

Like, my life's become less materialistic. Like, my wants. I mean, I love nice things, obviously, but, like, those are not. That's not the most important thing in my life anymore.

[Todd]

Well, that's a good thing for me.

[Unnamed Son]

But I do like nice things.

[Chase Grayson]

Me too.

[Todd]

For me it is. I just think God has given me an inner peace.

[Unnamed Son]

Really, I do. When's that kind of. That light going to shine out?

[Todd]

That light's for me. God intended that light to be for me. And I feel like that. Well, do you feel that I'm different?

[Chase Grayson]

Oh, I think you're way different.

[Todd]

And what way do you feel that I'm different?

[Chase Grayson]

I was telling her this the other day. I was like, he is not what he was before.

[Todd]

And what do you. What is different for you?

[Chase Grayson]

So much calmer, nicer it comes.

[Todd]

It's. It's because of the peace that God is giving.

[Chase Grayson]

We also didn't, like, when we talked, we didn't talk much. What do you mean, like, compared to how we talk now?

[Todd]

Well, now we talk. Well, now. Well, let's.

[Chase Grayson]

Let's just always on the phone, working, doing something.

[Todd]

And let's also unpack that a little bit, because when you, when you say, but we also didn't talk like we do now. I was busy talking at you.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah.

[Todd]

Not talking to you.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah.

[Todd]

And that was as a parent, me saying, no, you're going to go do this and this and this. Because I believe that those were the right things that you should be doing. The conversation changes with a parent and a child as they age. But I think that I'm just more interested now in. I'm interested in what my kids have to say. I'm interested in what you're going through to a certain degree.

[Chase Grayson]

Well, this is, like, the first time in my life that I talked to you on the phone probably seven, eight times a day.

[Todd]

Yeah. And I enjoy that. I enjoy that.

[Unnamed Son]

I get the dial tone.

[Chase Grayson]

I don't. If I go to the dial tone, I get a text. I'm on the phone. I'll call you.

[Todd]

And I get exactly. Exactly the. So you feel that. That the conversations are better?

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah, way better.

[Todd]

And what. And do you see any difference?

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah.

[Todd]

And what is the differences that you say?

[Unnamed Son]

I don't know. I feel like my childhood was very different than his.

[Todd]

Okay, in what way?

[Unnamed Son]

You've definitely calmed down a lot. But that dog's still barking in there.

[Todd]

Yes, for sure.

[Unnamed Son]

I don't know.

[Todd]

Well, if you. I was gone for 28 months.

[Unnamed Son]

That was bad.

[Todd]

What is the difference. What is the difference between before I left and when I came home?

[Chase Grayson]

You're like a different person.

[Unnamed Son]

I think you're more compassionate.

[Chase Grayson]

You're the same person and a different person.

[Todd]

Yeah.

[Unnamed Son]

Like, you're the same, but you're different. Like, I think you have more compassion for others and, like, helping people. Like what you've been doing. As far as. Personally, I don't know. I think. Yeah, I think you become more compassionate, for sure.

[Todd]

I think that my world has expanded to where before my whole world consisted of my children and your mother, and now my world has expanded to seeing so many other people outside of that and of recognizing that I can do so much more today than what I've ever done. And I don't think you ever put

[Unnamed Son]

limitations on yourself, though.

[Todd]

I've never had limitations on what I could do. But I think that I truly went through life with blinders on because I had created a wonderful, sheltered area for us to be in. And we had a beautiful life. And I didn't look outside of that to find anyone that. Anyone else that was struggling. I worried about taking care of me and mine. And today I. Today I get more gratification out of getting a text message or a message on Instagram of, oh, my God, my dad came home. You actually helped me, helped us. I get more satisfaction and gratification out of that than any time I've ever been on television anytime. And so I just think that I see all of y' all differently today. I don't see y' all as my babies anymore. I see y' all as young adults. That I have had a wonderful, glorious experience in having a small part of y' all being where you are. And I want I look forward to seeing y' all grow and do and achieve and accomplish. And I want to hear from you, and I want you to ask me for advice, but I don't want you to ask me for advice and not take it, because then it becomes a waste of my time. So if you're truly committed to saying, well, wonder what, Dad, I don't think

[Unnamed Son]

that's a waste of your time. I think that's somebody getting.

[Chase Grayson]

We might not directly take it, but

[Unnamed Son]

you can take bits and pieces of it and apply it to how. Like what your beliefs are.

[Todd]

If I tell you that fire's hot, don't put your damn hand in it. And you go, put your hand on the eye and come to me and say, dad, look at my hand. I got to go to the emergency room. Now you. Now you've taken up my time to go sit in an emergency room. I told you not to put your damn hand in the fire. You didn't listen. So for me, I've had to learn. And again, this goes back to that 28 months. I would have never been able to say what I'm getting ready to say without that 28 months. When you surrender all, you give up the stress of having to try to be right.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah.

[Todd]

And I no longer need to be right about everything. As a matter of fact, I would prefer in a lot of the instances in my life that I had not been right. Because wouldn't it be a great thing to go through life and not have to worry about, oh, this is. But what if this happens? And what if this happens because we spend so much time worrying about the what ifs that we never. That we can't try to understand the

[Unnamed Son]

why or enjoy the moment.

[Todd]

That's right. And I don't if there's anything y' all can take from my life. Enjoy your moment. Enjoy your moments. Because those are fleeting. Those are fleeting because you were talking about this last night about sitting at the dining room table about how long you've been in college. Does it feel like you've been there that long? And you see how.

[Chase Grayson]

But also do a good job of enjoying it. Like, I know it's not going to last forever.

[Todd]

Right.

[Chase Grayson]

I feel like I see a lot of other people there take it for granted, though.

[Todd]

Well, the good news is that you're not.

[Chase Grayson]

Because I like every day. I'm like, love this place.

[Todd]

That's such a blessing. That is. And you need to give thanks to God for that.

[Chase Grayson]

I love it down there.

[Todd]

That you have been given this safe place within The University of Alabama to grow, to be nurtured and, and to be made to be. To feel safe. Because you have had wonderful people there that have wrapped their arms around you from the community, from the school, from faculty to coaches. You know, you've had, you've had wonderful opportunity. You've had wonderful opportunities and you've also had wonderful experiences and you've met some wonderful people because really this was the first time you were ever thrown into a group of kids.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah, that's what I've always said. As I was around adults my whole life. This is the first time I was actually around kids my age.

[Unnamed Son]

Right.

[Todd]

And that's helped you.

[Chase Grayson]

Yeah.

[Todd]

Because you will come to me and say that I don't know how some of these dumb ass people do the. They do.

[Chase Grayson]

There's some dumbass people there.

[Todd]

And. But you know, don't you think that the fact that you recognize that also goes back to the way you were raised?

[Chase Grayson]

Also realize how much growing around adults benefited me? Because I see some people there and I'm like, grow up. No idea. Like I'll see him crying about something or complaining about something.

[Unnamed Son]

I'm like, that's that also. You wait till you've went through, you

[Chase Grayson]

wait till these rest of these years run out and you really gonna have something to complain about.

[Todd]

Right, exactly. Well, I am glad that you have found a happy place within your school and your friends that you have created. That's that social circle that you've created and that Alabama has been so wonderful to you. And I'm glad that you're at a place to where you are starting to find peace in decisions that you're making and that you don't. That you realize that the peace and the joy does not come from the things that surround you. It comes from within and from your. And for. And for truly your walk with Christ. That's where it truly comes from. Yeah. So the closer you get to him, the less anxiety you're going to have. That's what I have found.

[Unnamed Son]

Yeah, for sure.

[Todd]

Well, on that note, I appreciate both of you and I love you both dearly. And until next week, good luck and God bless you.