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- [00:01]
Jameela
This episode is brought to you by ebay. We all have that piece, the one that's so you. You've basically become known for it. And if you don't yet fashionistas, you'll find it on ebay.
- [00:10]
Mecca
That Miu Miu red leather bomber, the.
- [00:12]
Jameela
Cousteau Barcelona cowboy top. Or that Patagonia fleece in the 2017 colorway. All these finds are all on ebay, along with millions of more main character pieces backed by authenticity guarantee. Ebay is the place for pre loved and vintage fashion.
- [00:27]
Mecca
EBay, things people love. On WhatsApp, no one can see or hear your personal messages. Whether it's a voice call message or sending a password to WhatsApp, it's all just this. So whether you're sharing the streaming password in the family chat or trading those late night voice messages that could basically become a podcast, your personal messages stay between you, your friends and your family. No one else, not even us. WhatsApp message privately with everyone.
- [01:00]
Jameela
She throwing in that cash talk Walk in the booth like Naomi on the catwalk and tell them move from the jaguar. It ain't even right though Push me and I might go she ain't getting money. I'm like, what the. The hype foe when them bitches bite flow make my appetite go poof. Gone. Voila. Magic looking mad good just to pull up on them ramping.
- [01:22]
Mecca
Welcome back to another episode of Unhinged, Immoral. I am Mecca.
- [01:26]
Jameela
And I'm Jameela Black Elitism. And we're talking about the Tattleton Universal.
- [01:36]
Mecca
Jamila, a member of Alpha Copper Alpha Sorority Incorporated. What's the other one? Jack and Jill Lynx. Naacp, Urban League, Oak Bluffs, Martha's Vineyard, Ralph Lauren.
- [01:50]
Jameela
You know, actually, actually, actually, it's. It's. Ralph, Scare the fuck out of me and my black pants before we get.
- [01:59]
Mecca
Too deep into this. Jumping the Broom was one of my favorite movies growing up. I literally. And I think that that movie perfectly encapsulates the bourgeoisie meeting the working class from around the way. And as someone who grew up in that exact experience, it really tickled my fancy. It did. It did. It did. Like, imagine my dad, my debutante ball in the bodilion. It was.
- [02:31]
Jameela
It was quite.
- [02:32]
Mecca
He was like. He was like, this is nice, but what the fuck?
- [02:37]
Jameela
You know, for context, for those of you. Because this is going to be coming out a little bit after probably the conversation has died down a bit, but you know us, we love to bring it back up. So for context, Ralph Lauren dropped a collab specifically highlighting the Black folks in Oak Bluff, which is a specific black part of Martha's Vineyard, and kind of just showcasing the type of clothes, I guess, that they would wear up there. And they also did, like, a specific collab with, like, Morehouse and Spelman, a little Spellhouse type shit, little sweaters and gidgets and gadgets and things, you know, sweaters and collars and pants, 1920s gear. And because of that, a couple of people on TikTok, it has curated a discussion about division elitism of some sorts. And why are we showing blacks wearing Ralph Lauren in an uppity bougie way when we stole Ralph Lauren polos and we would freak it in such a street style way? Why would they not show the street styles? That was the conversation I was having.
- [03:40]
Mecca
I was so confused by the conversation because it happened when we were in, like, in LA working. And I feel like when we're actually on work trips, my screen time, I mean, I don't feel I see it. It goes down significantly based on what my phone tells me, but also based on the conversations on TikTok. So I was like, what are y' all talking about?
- [03:56]
Jameela
I got it late. So I actually got it.
- [03:58]
Mecca
I didn't get anything. I've been picking it up as I go and I feel like. And you can correct me just based on what I got. I hate to sound like this is Oak Bluff's not brand alignment with, like, Ralph Lauren. Like, that's the part that confuses me.
- [04:14]
Jameela
Well, can I be honest?
- [04:15]
Mecca
Be honest. Cause I'm. I still don't fully grasp where we're going. Like you're mad at Ralph Lauren for being bougie. Like, that's the part that's confusing to me.
- [04:24]
Jameela
I did not know about Oak Bluff until I watched forever. So if I'm being quite honest, like, just to kind of give a little backstory about my blackness, let's go identify.
- [04:36]
Mecca
Our blacknesses before we get into what's.
- [04:38]
Jameela
Going on, the nuance of said conversation. So we all know I'm from Beaumont, Texas. My father is from Mobile, Alabama. Okay. Both of my parents grew up in Poppy.
- [04:49]
Mecca
Oh, my God. I was not recording that entire time. And I only know because my camera just shut off. Well, luckily for us, we're not too deep.
- [04:59]
Jameela
Your computer was recording.
- [05:00]
Mecca
It's okay.
- [05:01]
Jameela
I was going to say, like, damn. I didn't think that was that. I was like. I thought you were responding to me both saying, my parents were 45. Oh, my God. I was like, what? She's really elitist. She hates poverty.
- [05:18]
Mecca
I was like, what's all right, guys? Unfortunately, I forgot to press record on my camera. So for the first. What was this? Like, five minutes of the episode? I will. You will see the wallpaper peeling at the top. But I'm back. I'm here now. And I don't hate black people in poverty like Jamila's parents grew up. I was just.
- [05:36]
Jameela
So what we were gonna say is we were kind of gonna give you guys a little blurb about our blackness and our black experience quickly and then kind of get into the conversation. Cause I feel like that matters when you grew up is going to persuade your perspective on this. So anyways, both my parents grew up in poverty. Both of my parents also went to college. They went to HBCUs. They went to Prairie View A and M, as did my father's siblings, most of them, except for one. And so both of my parents are college graduated, and I've lived in Gwinnett county for several years. I went to schooling in Gwinnett County Middle school. High school. Right. If you know, you know, Gwinnett county is one of the top educational systems in Georgia.
- [06:22]
Mecca
Migos are liars.
- [06:23]
Jameela
And then, huh?
- [06:24]
Mecca
The Migos are liars. Well, it's the Twitter streets be saying the Migos are from a Gwenette.
- [06:33]
Jameela
They are from Gwenette.
- [06:34]
Mecca
Okay.
- [06:35]
Jameela
But they rep Gwinnett.
- [06:38]
Mecca
I didn't know that.
- [06:39]
Jameela
They've always rep. Gt. That's like. That's the whole part of it.
- [06:41]
Mecca
Oh, but they're like trappers out of Gwenette.
- [06:44]
Jameela
Yeah, that's what I said. That's a whole other conversation. Anyways, focus myself. Sorry. So after high school, I went to Hampton my freshman year. I could not afford to stay at Hampton. I did not have scholarships, and my parents could not afford to pay for Hampton out of pocket. So I transferred to good old State School, Georgia State, where I graduated with $60,000 in debt. And then I entered the workforce in some sort of way. So that's kind of just like my brand experience. And like I said, I didn't. I didn't know about Oak Bluff until watching Forever. I've always heard of, like, Martha's Vineyard, just like through like pop culture and shit. But I just always thought of it as like, you know, the Hamptons or whatever the fuck, you know, like where the white people go to vacation. I didn't know that there was a black part of it, so seeing that in forever was pretty cool. Just a little tidbit. I also didn't know what Jack and Jill was until I went to College and met people who were actually in this Jack and Jill program. I'd never even heard of a cotillion. I never heard of any of those things until I went to Hampton. But because when you go to HBCUs, you're inundated with all of the blacks, so you get to see all of the different backgrounds and stuff. And, well, Hampton is one of the Bougier HBCUs. It just is what it is. So there were quite a few Jack and Jillians and things of that nature. So that is my. That is my blackness. That is the very, very, very standard middle. Not even middle class, working class, black.
- [08:15]
Mecca
Well, I was a debutante. No, but okay. My mom is educated. She has a few degrees. My dad did not graduate from high school. She got some ism, you know, what is like the educated girl, college hood, nigga dynamic. That's very much my parents. With that being said, though, my mom, who is a teacher, was a teacher when I was growing up and then transferred into, like social work because she's into helping people. I was exposed to these programs. So I was aware of Oak Bluff. My mom was really big on us being. I've said on the Internet, my mom is Claire Hextable.
- [08:59]
Jameela
She.
- [09:00]
Mecca
If you've ever met my mother, she's very. We speak clearly and articulate. We're not like them. But like, also wanting to educate the not like thems. Does that make sense? Like, she cares about black youth. She wants. She preaches education is freedom, all that good stuff. My dad's family is complete opposite. So I have been exposed to both sides. I was aware of Oak Bluff. I'm not from Martha's Vineyard, obviously, I'm from California. Like I said, I was in cotillion. My brother was in Botillion. Like, I'm just aware of all the. And I also went to Hampton, so, you know, I rep for the suburban blacks who have a parent from the hood. Doesn't mean you're a sucker. You can still fight, but you don't have to, you know, false claim. It is what it is. Now that you have our background and how. I do feel like that was important to put out how we interpret things. And if, you know, like I said.
- [10:00]
Jameela
I.
- [10:03]
Mecca
I'm just very confused. Like, I don't. I don't mind admitting that certain programs are elitist because at its core, HBCUs are elitists. All the Jack and Jills, the Botillions, the D9s. Like, these are all technically speaking, elitist black organizations at their core, which. And I'M not saying that they are not positively affecting black culture. I'm not saying that they negatively affect black culture. I think that they do both at times. But I don't, like, I don't, I don't want to because they tried to in my comments make it seem like I was saying that they're not elitist. That's not what I'm saying at all. I just. The part that's confusing me is Ralph Lauren at its core, even as a white brand, has always been. Even before like niggas hijacked it. You're going to like, if you're looking at their advertising, they're always going to be on the polo course. They're always like sweaters wrapped around their shoulders. So like brand alignment with like Morehouse and Oak Bluffs, the fact that that's what set off the conversation is confusing to me because that seems like brand alignment with Ralph Lauren and their ads in general.
- [11:12]
Jameela
When I saw the ads beef. So I saw the ads before the conversation, which I always think is you get a different, you get a different perspective because if you see the conversation, then you see the ads, sometimes you're kind of like conflicted and like, it can kind of warp your view of it.
- [11:27]
Mecca
So I saw the ads beforehand, the.
- [11:30]
Jameela
Conversation, and my genuine reaction was I like this, this is really cute. This is really nice.
- [11:35]
Mecca
It made sense.
- [11:38]
Jameela
And again, I had just finished watching Forever, so now I know about Oak Bluff. So I feel like I'm hip to the bluff, right? And so I'm like, okay, this reminds me of, you know, watching that episode of Forever. And I was admiring, I was honestly admiring the coloring of the edits. You know, I'm, you know, I'm a little film nurse. I was like, oh, this is really well done, like crafted. But I was also noticing how many dark skinned black people were involved on camera and on screen. And I really enjoyed that as well. And I also admired how there was, it was a specific advertisement with this black elder and it was a woman and she was kind of just talking about what going to Oak Bluff meant for her for all these years. Just having that candid conversation. It wasn't even necessarily like, hey guys, Ralph Lauren, you know what I'm saying? It was more so like, this is a group of people that do this specific activity in this specific part of town and let's tell our stories. But that in itself was used as brand endorsement for the brand. So that's why I felt like it was very authentic to that part of the world. So that was what my. My first thought was when I saw it. So I wasn't necessarily. I wasn't anticipating it becoming discourse at all, to be honest. I thought it was going to be a simple. You see the ad, you repost and you keep scrolling, to be honest.
- [13:05]
Mecca
Because again, with everything that you said and everything that I've seen from Ralph Lauren's ads, like, historically, it lined up, like, brand alignment wise. And I too, saw the ad before the discourse. And I too, was like, I saw the Morehouse. The picture of the. Of the Morehouse boys in the old timey 1920s clothes before I kept scrolling and was seeing everything else. So when I first saw it, I said, oh, this makes sense, Morehouse. Like. Like, that was literally what I thought. I said. This. This aligns. This makes sense. And I like the pictures. Everyone looks nice. It gives. And I could tell that they had used old HBCU yearbooks for that particular part of the shoot. If you've ever looked through the yearbooks of your HBCU or any HBCU from the early. From the 20s and the 30s, that's what those pictures were inspired by. And since I had that knowledge going into it, I said, oh, this is well done. Cool.
- [14:01]
Jameela
Yeah, I thought it was. And that's coming from somebody who. I never dressed like that. That's not my brand of black fashion. Nova Dam. I've never even. Like I said, I never even heard of Oak Bluff until this year when I watched a freaking Netflix TV show. Um, I am. My family is very hood, you know what I'm saying? Like, that's not. That's not my story. And so I was able to kind of digest it and recognize that that was somebody's story, just wasn't necessarily mine. And I kind of just went about my day.
- [14:28]
Mecca
The other part that I guess I liked about it is that Martha's Vineyard is known. Has become over the years known for being, like, white. A white getaway. And I really, in the past decade, probably since jumping the broom came out, have enjoyed how, like, the black people who live there and vacation there, even if that's a different tax bracket than, like, I grew up in. Because I want to make it clear, even though, like, my parents weren't rich, like, I would definitely consider an upper middle class upbringing. But when I went to Hampton, I realized, like, oh, bitch.
- [15:04]
Jameela
There'S layers.
- [15:05]
Mecca
You know what I'm saying? It's layers to that money and how long it is. And I just want to. I'm more on the.
- [15:10]
Jameela
We were more on the new Money.
- [15:12]
Mecca
In terms of. My parents had their own business together and they were doing very like, in a different way. And then also we lived in California. But like, when you go to certain places and you start meeting motherfuckers who are generationally like Hamptonians, and it'll, it's, it's funny because it's like that money, okay, that's different.
- [15:30]
Jameela
When you haven't experienced wealth in that way, people will talk. Because the thing is, you talk casually about your life without It's. It's not something you're cognizant of until people say things that unlock things like, well, hold on, what do you, what do you mean?
- [15:45]
Mecca
Like, I think, for example, here's a good.
- [15:48]
Jameela
What are you talking about?
- [15:48]
Mecca
Here's a good thing. Or like a good example. When I went to Hampton, it was easy for me to bond with the girls who had been in like, debutante ball. So, you know, we're talking about our things now. To give you perspective of like, my parents being the working end of like the upper middle class, I rented my debutante dress. I did not buy it because buying it is thousands of dollars. When I went to Hampton and was talking to girls like, oh, my debutante dress cost 10k. My mother paid $400 to rent it and give it back. Do you see what I'm like? And that is even though you're kind of in the circle, there is still very like different layers of said circle. Oh, like, I just want to make that clear.
- [16:35]
Jameela
A wake up call for me. Yeah, I remember, you know, just in casual conversation, but also just noticing, you know, physically, people walking around in Designer, Designer. And I just bought my own designer bag this year, and it's Coach. And that's no shade to coach, because I love Coach. But it's not a Chanel. It's not a Louis. There's, you know, there's levels even within the designer sphere. There's layers. So it's like I'm looking at kids my age walk around with like, designer from head to toe. And not just one day of the week.
- [17:10]
Mecca
Oh, at 8:00am, at that 8:00am, drip.
- [17:13]
Jameela
Or dry, it was like, oh, this is different. We're not the same, you and I. There was just differences. And so like being exposed to that is it. It can be very like jarring. Jarring and alarming. And then you can start to feel a little bit of insecurity as well. Cause I definitely started to feel like, damn, like I thought we were good because we did go to Disney World that one time. I thought.
- [17:39]
Mecca
Honestly, I was more confused as to why the boys from PG county were trying to act like they were from the trenches and you're. You're dripping and drowning in designer every day of the week, sir. I don't believe you.
- [17:52]
Jameela
It's a crazy mind.
- [17:54]
Mecca
We're going to take a break.
- [17:57]
Jameela
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- [18:15]
Mecca
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- [18:26]
Jameela
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- [18:31]
Mecca
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- [18:44]
Jameela
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- [19:04]
Mecca
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- [19:13]
Jameela
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- [19:19]
Mecca
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- [19:27]
Jameela
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- [20:01]
Mecca
Back to Ralph Lauren. What I was saying was I think it's been cool because Martha's Vineyard like, the whole black population of Martha's Vineyard also is not rich. I just want, like, they have their own thing out there. And so I think it's been really cool to learn about it. And, you know, if you have the knowledge that that is a different wealth class in some cases. I just. When I watched it, I was much like you. I said, oh, this is so cool. I feel like we're learning about a part of black culture that we don't always learn about. I didn't look at it from a social class lens at all. I just normally ingested.
- [20:42]
Jameela
So with the conversation happening on TikTok, there's two. There's two sides to the conversation, and I do feel like each side is making valid points. However, I just wish that the conversation happened outside of this ad, because I do feel like the ad actually was more so a catalyst to the conversation and not really like, the. Is the. It's not really correlating, if that makes sense. It's like they just sparked the thought. Yeah, right. But now it's like we're also. Now we're having conversations that are completely outside of this ad. And so on one end, I see the. It's two strings, two extremes of the argument, too. So on one end, it's like, that. That does not explain all the black people. That's not how we are. I grew up in the trenches. I grew up here. I grew up there. We used to steal polo. We used to freak polo like this. This is what I want to see presented. And on the other side is, well, black people aren't a monolith. We deserve to see ourselves in this type of space. And I can't help that. Y' all used to steal shit. I never had to steal shit. And. And. And just all these other things. And so while both sides have valued opinions and arguments, I think both sides are also being a bit disingenuous and ignorant.
- [21:57]
Mecca
Dare I say it? Because let me. So in the video that I made that was much like the top of this, like, pod, I was like, I'm really confused at this conversation. I'm confused at how he got here from the Ralph Lauren ad. And someone was in the comments, like, just say. Just say the organizations are elitist. I'm like, well, yes, but I'm also like, I'm still so confused. Because the thing, like, I think the part that's confusing me is it's like, yes, y' all are making points, but when has Ralph Lauren ever. The ads ever been anything but motherfuckers on the Polo course. So, like, at the very bare minimum of advertising and their brand alignment, I'm not talking about how niggas took Ralph Lauren and freaked it. I'm talking about how Ralph Lauren, the brand presents themselves to us. That aligns with how they have quite literally always presented themselves to us. So it simply makes sense. Even when the rappers were wearing Ralph Lauren all the motherfucking time, they still didn't put them niggas in the ads. Cause that wasn't their.
- [22:59]
Jameela
Somebody made a good point in saying that if they were to do that, it would give off very inauthentic and pandering. And I.
- [23:05]
Mecca
And I agree with that. Like, because they're never. Like, I just have never seen a Ralph Lauren ad that didn't give Rich. And we're at the golf course. So I don't see why even when you're using non white people and using black people, it still wouldn't align. Like, yeah, I would be. I think I would be a little irritated if you veered from your brand alignment and made it niggering trenchy. I feel like, oh, I don't like that.
- [23:30]
Jameela
I'd be like, ralph Lauren, who the fuck? You know what I mean? Like, the thing is, and I hate to say it, we have to divest from this idea that representation is only important for one group of people. Representation is about. Is about showing all of the things. And when we're talking about black folks, the same applies. So, for example, I remember when Sexyy Red came out, this conversation of representation y' all hated that too, was happening again. Like, why is Sexyy Red the representation of all blacks? I don't act like that. I don't pop my pussy severely. I don't do this. I don't do that. This is not how we are. We are better than that. And while I don't necessarily see myself in sexy red, it doesn't affect me. And I think that y' all have a problem with acknowledging that there are sectors of people out there that absolutely identify with several different parts of blackness. You know what I mean? We cannot only show bougie ass, uppity Negros. We can't. But we also can't show hood niggas all day, every day. There's a lot of different type of black folks. Because I just told y', all, I don't. I don't identify with either side because I grew up working class American, and I'm still very much working class. I don't. That's. Those. Just both of those are not my experience. But I'm not offended by seeing both of them.
- [25:11]
Mecca
When the sexyy red conversation was happening a couple years ago, I made a. I remember being like, white people are allowed to exist and have so many different versions of themselves. And then when we do the same thing, it's like we have to be all in the same box. We can't have a sexy red because not all people, black people act like sexyy red. Fair. But sexy reds do exist in the world. I'm related to someone. I know the girls like sexyy red. But then also there are people who go to who are like Oak Bluff, who are like forever, who are like Martha's Vineyard, who are like jumping the broom. They deserve to see themselves in some shit too. And everyone in between also deserves to see themselves. Like when you're watching shows like Black Ish. When you're watching shows like. Like that is important for people to see all walks. And I just feel like black people, we're the only ones who. It's like whenever we see one brand, then we get mad. It's like, you know when you be like, the sky is beautiful, why you ain't see the trees is beautiful. The trees beautiful too. It's just like, I mean, I. We're not talking about the trees right now. I don't know.
- [26:16]
Jameela
And I think that also people are so close minded to other perspectives too. Because while I don't agree with the idea of this advertising, this advertisement and this brand sponsorship, because we have to be honest, guys, this is a commercial, okay? It's a commercial. It is not literature brought to us by W.E.B. du Bois to be digested and dissected into critical race theory. It is not something of that magnitude. It is a commercial. So by nature, it's already rooted in capitalism. Okay? So now that we got that out the fucking way, you guys have an issue with also just taking heed to what someone is saying, right? Because if someone is raising valid points, regardless of where it comes from, you can acknowledge somebody raising valid points without doing a dig. Because while I disagree that the ad is not a good representation of all black people, I don't necessarily agree with that. Yes, there are conversations to be had about the elitism within black folks, right? So then on the, on the flip side, because you don't agree with the concept of the ad, participating in that conversation, now you want to flip it and make it seem like these black people in these entities are not elitists or capitalists or classes, now we're lying.
- [27:32]
Mecca
It's just, it's Just the idea that it has to be all or nothing. Like, you. You can't. You can't use your brain and be like, I agree with this part, but I don't agree with this part. I agree with that part, but I don't agree with that part. It's like, that's the Stan culture of it all. That's like the literal obtuseness of it all. And I feel like a lot of times, especially I see with myself when I'm like, no, I don't completely agree with that, but I agree with this part. People act like they don't get that. And it's like, that's what I was saying earlier when I was like, do these institutions offer positive attributes to our community? Absolutely. You can look at you. You were just talking about at the National Urban League about, like, how the D9 contributes to the black community positively. How HBCUs contribute to our community positively. How things like Jack and Jill do contribute to the community positively. Does that mean that they are not rooted in elitism and that they do not get elitist? No. Like, it just like some stuff do be. It is what it is. It is what it is. It is what it is. What y' all gonna eradicate historically black colleges? Cause they elite elitist. Good luck.
- [28:42]
Jameela
I don't know, you know the concept of when you fly too close to the sun, right? Or you are so left that it becomes right. Like, you know, when you go too far, like, you circle back around. So that's kind of what I see happening in this conversation. I watched somebody talk about how they felt like they were on the side of the conversation that was saying this commercial, this concept, all of these things is very elitist, right? And I'm listening to them explain why they feel it was elitist. I'm like, okay, valid point, valid point. And then they continued to talk, and they said, and some of y' all is repping these HBCUs, and them HBCUs has an acceptance rate of 50%. I would understand it if you was repping like a Yale. I said, and I gotcha. Is the problem the way you are trying to condemn people for anti blackness by using anti blackness is such the dichotomy of the two.
- [29:39]
Mecca
And that is the point.
- [29:40]
Jameela
It is quite disturbing that I was.
- [29:42]
Mecca
Trying to make that when you're coming at a caste system, you cannot choose one racial group that participates in said caste system. You have to come at the entire system, right? Because there is a hierarchy in white culture, in Latin culture, like in Asian culture. If you go like that mirrors the white supremacy of this country. I just feel like the hands like it's all interconnecting and leading back to white supremacy and Ronald Reagan, who is in hell. I'm always going to bring it back to Ronald Reagan also. Hogan, sir, let me tell you something. I have to veer off. I thought Hulk Hogan was, like, regular racist. I did not know he was that racist. Unfortunately, in America, you know, you have a baseline racist with the white people. I thought he was like, turn that music down. Racist. I did not know he was a full hard er. I'm disowning my daughter for fucking a black man. I said, oh, you're in hell.
- [30:48]
Jameela
He's the. I said n five times in one sentence. Racist.
- [30:51]
Mecca
I did not know that.
- [30:53]
Jameela
And he tripled and tripled, triple, triple down. Once Trump became Trump. Right. Presidentially Trump. And he said, actually, I'm gonna take this a step further, and I'm gonna do as much as I can to make sure you monkeys don't see heaven. So jokes on him. That nigga's in hell getting his dick.
- [31:12]
Mecca
Sucked by Nancy Reagan. Anyway, you know, if you're gonna come at the system, come at the entire system. But, yeah, you can't push. You can't say, oh, this is anti black, and then reinforce it with more anti blackness. That sucks.
- [31:28]
Jameela
And as I was gonna say, and I. And I'm. I be wanting to know, what. What do y' all want? You know? Okay, so what's the solution? You feel as though people are being very elitist. And then you talk about the elitism within these HBCUs, which, again, fair. But then you think the solution is to. Then we should divest from HBCUs and invest in PWIs, where the acceptance rates are so much lower and there's not a lot of fairness that goes on between races. Is that what you feel like the solution? Cause I'm here to tell you, experiencing both. That's not the solution.
- [32:03]
Mecca
It's not.
- [32:03]
Jameela
And I had it. And I had it good. Cause I went to Georgia State, which is technically a pwi, but it had a whole lot of niggas there. So it was a little bit of a skewed experience. But I can't imagine going to somewhere like the University of Georgia. Well, I went to Towson or UCLA or whatever. I can't fucking imagine being a nigga there. That type of environment. Like, no, I can't.
- [32:27]
Mecca
And let me say this. I was at Towson, the point where, like, the police were shooting niggas down in the street what seemed to be like every other month and having to be in classes where white boys were playing devil's advocate and the white teachers were like, well, wait, let him finish. Do you see what I'm saying? That would have never happened at an hbcu. It's just certain things that it's like, y' all can't make the point by giving the point. You're trying to disprove more power. It's very strange. And we actually see that a lot on TikTok, I feel, in terms of. Because TikTok and social media in general has created a space where everyone can get online and show what they're doing. And so in a way, it is good because you're seeing much like a HBCU experience. You're seeing, oh, black people are so different. Like, black people. We're not all the same. We're all living in, like, different realities in state, diaspora, all these things. But then it's also putting everyone on the chopping block to be critiqued and be like, oh, I don't like the.
- [33:23]
Jameela
Way you do that over there. I don't like.
- [33:25]
Mecca
It's like, well, I don't think that you don't like it because you just don't understand it. It's not. It's not yours. You know, even down to, like, the people being like, African food is like, nasty. Like, have you had su.
- [33:39]
Jameela
Yeah, we're just in a. We're in a weird state right now with black folks to where it's constant dissonance in between us as a group of people. And that's the part that's kind of frustrating for me because I feel like no matter the context, there is just discourse. Because just a little while ago, y' all were talking about how y' all want to defund Tyler Perry and Madea because he's only addressing, like, the lower class people who like these types of, you know, images and videos about them. But then you. It's so it's again, it's consistent contradictions. So that's why I'm asking, like, what do you all want? You are not the target demographic and audience for every fucking thing in general. Right? So if you don't like African food, bitch, don't fucking eat it. But also you making a video talking about how nasty think African food is and talking about it as African food as in the continent. I know that you're an ignorant piece of shit because. And I also know that you probably never even really had it. You know what I'm saying like you, I can't take y' all seriously because while I understand you want to have the freedom to say whatever the fuck you want to say, I understand you want to be represented. I understand you have these, these, these valid points here and there. You don't know how to fucking articulate it.
- [35:06]
Mecca
So you know what I like, Let me just say I like when people, when people want to be ignorant but lean into being the ignorance. Do you see what I'm saying? I think it's funny when you be around the niggas who be like, shit, I'm not trying to be smart, I know I ain't smart, but this is how I feel. And this, and it's like, it's very light hearted. I think the part about the Internet that gets very irritating is when people think that they are so fucking smart and they're like, this is my think piece and it's the most dumbest shit you've ever heard in your life. At least when niggas say dumb shit, they know they say undumb shit. And that's the runaway quality of it all. Like I know I'm saying some stupid shit right now. Do you see what I'm saying like that? And that's what we're missing. We have to get back to when we are going to spew ignorance. There's a sense that the person saying it knows it's ignorant and the person receiving it also knows it's complete nonsense because that is the piece that's missing.
- [36:05]
Jameela
There is an art to being funny too, right? Like I know I got some ignorant thoughts to get off that are not necessarily rooted in anything other than an observation. So I am not going to present it to you like it's fucking research. You get what I'm saying?
- [36:21]
Mecca
Exactly.
- [36:22]
Jameela
You know what I'm saying? For an example, if I want to say, you know, Asian girls really love above. They don't got nothing to do with no research. I just know what I see and a bang. I'm not going to try to make it this deep. It's not that conversation about Asianism. No. Them Asian little girls love a fuck ass Bob and they be hitting that hole. They be sharp as hell. Like they get it chopped up every fucking week. I don't know what it is about them Asian little girls, but they gonna have a sharp ass Bob.
- [36:47]
Mecca
Or like how, like where do Mexican mothers find the tiny little heels for the three year olds? Where do y' all like, where did you guys find the heels?
- [36:57]
Jameela
These are silly observations. You Will always see a Mexican with no pockets on the jeans so that booty sit up tight. They don't have nothing to do with the location. Never seen them in the store.
- [37:07]
Mecca
Where are you finding them?
- [37:09]
Jameela
I've never found them. I don't know.
- [37:11]
Mecca
Do you see how we're not making that seem or we're not presenting it as if it's like a dissertation? We have not cited any sources.
- [37:20]
Jameela
Conversation. I'm just telling you what I circumstances. See? I'm just telling you what I see. So maybe if y' all would have got on here and been like, now Ralph Lauren. No, we be stealing that shit and made it a good kiki, we wouldn't have discourse. But no, you want to sit up here and have a full on dissertation as if you are fighting for the rights of every black that has ever blacked all you had to be like now contextual information.
- [37:42]
Mecca
No, that is not how Bootsy was wearing that Ralph Lauren in the Wipe Me down music video. It was a 4xl tall tee.
- [37:50]
Jameela
You had the perfect opportunity to show like, here's how I would have did this Ralph Lauren ad. Cause you know where I'm from, we don't wear that bullshit like that. You know what I'm saying? This is how we fucking freak it. But instead it was you. You. You are knocking off a whole group of people who do feel validated and who do feel represented. Right? Y' all got to learn how to, how to. How to throw some shit out there so that it'll stick in the way that you want. I make a lot of like observations and jokes on my TikTok that don't turn into actual discourse because it's of kind comes. It comes off very light hearted and not like I'm trying to actually like dive super, super deep into things. And some things just aren't deep.
- [38:30]
Mecca
It's just like, okay. And I want to like, I want to get into that. Because as deep as things be in terms of stereotypes, in terms of all these different things and isms that go on in America, I don't think a lot of shit be as deep as we make it seem. Especially on TikTok. There's been this culture since the pandemic where everything is this big thing and it' it's just like it's never been like that before.
- [38:55]
Jameela
This and no shade, y' all are spending all of this effort talking about the Ralph Lauren ad with the uppity blacks in Martha's Vineyard when you could be spending all that energy coming for American Eagles spreading Nazi propaganda. And the Aryan Brotherhood with fucking Sydney Sweeney and her titties and her blonde hair and blue eyes with them goddamn good jeans. I'm just saying you have the material if you want to talk about some shit that's deep. Talk about that. She got her blonde hair blue eyed on that goddamn thing with them titties and said, join me in the master race.
- [39:28]
Mecca
Is that what she said? I haven't seen it. I've seen the.
- [39:32]
Jameela
It's very, very obvious. Nazi.
- [39:36]
Mecca
Hold on, I'm gonna look it up. Sydney Sweeney, American Eagle ad.
- [39:41]
Jameela
It's horrible. It's actually like so obvious. It's not even like, oh, y' all weren't even trying to be slick. It said, sydney Sweeney hats, good jeans. Get the fuck out of here.
- [39:53]
Mecca
We're gonna take a break.
- [39:57]
Jameela
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- [40:07]
Mecca
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Jameela
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Mecca
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Jameela
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- [40:14]
Mecca
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- [40:16]
Jameela
Give it a try@mintmobile.com Switch.
- [40:19]
Mecca
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- [40:28]
Jameela
And we're back.
- [40:30]
Mecca
Oh, yeah. They just called me a nigger.
- [40:35]
Jameela
And it's like, mind you, it's only funny.
- [40:38]
Mecca
It's not funny, but it's obviously clear because Sydney Sweeney has MAGA ties. Like her brother is super maga. Her whole family's maga.
- [40:45]
Jameela
Yeah, she thought she was slick with her titties.
- [40:47]
Mecca
Yeah. My traits and black hair and blue eyes.
- [40:51]
Jameela
It's not. Not. Not only is it Nazi propaganda, it's eugenics. Y' all went full in. And I'm thinking about the conversation a couple of months ago where you n were getting on here telling me that eugenics is not an issue. They just.
- [41:07]
Mecca
They just a couple weeks ago said the blind people shouldn't have the baby. And that baby is as cute as a button again.
- [41:15]
Jameela
Here we are.
- [41:16]
Mecca
Can't even see how cute that baby is.
- [41:18]
Jameela
So I'm gonna argue about some deep ass when it come to commercial. I got some shit y' all can dig. Exactly. All right. I got some shit you can dig.
- [41:26]
Mecca
I always want to reference Michael Jackson. Please, please. Because Michael went and went and had them kids that's not his kids. So I really, I just can't. I just can't.
- [41:40]
Jameela
Now what does that have to do.
- [41:41]
Mecca
Because they always reference Michael Jackson, say, if you can't have a baby, can't afford a baby, don't have a baby, or whatever. What did he say in that, in that song? That's always a eugenic argument.
- [41:49]
Jameela
Baby. Then don't have a baby.
- [41:50]
Mecca
Yeah.
- [41:51]
Jameela
Michael was not a sociologist.
- [41:52]
Mecca
He wasn't. Which is why he went ahead and kids who are not his kids. Exactly. With blonde hair and blue eyes.
- [41:59]
Jameela
So not even the point.
- [42:01]
Mecca
That is the point.
- [42:02]
Jameela
Not correlated.
- [42:02]
Mecca
You can't. Like, like, exactly. Michael is not like, I, I sorry. I can't take Michael's reference seriously as a site, as a source to be cited with this particular subject. Now, if he's teaching me how to moonwalk, I'll listen. Or honestly, if he's giving me instructions on how to get a blowout, I will also listen. Because it was slick and it was shiny. You know, Mikey would have used sacred.
- [42:39]
Jameela
Like, you just keep trying to dig. Like, what are we talking about now?
- [42:43]
Mecca
He would have had that sacred partnership on lock. I think I'm done.
- [42:52]
Jameela
Moral of the story is, guys, you guys are arguing about more and more things every fucking day. And my God, touch grass.
- [43:01]
Mecca
Go outside.
- [43:01]
Jameela
Can't we all just get along? Shout out to Rodney King.
- [43:04]
Mecca
Rip Rip.
- [43:08]
Jameela
But you know what? I feel like it's so interesting. I've seen way more class separation in the past five years and a half in my entire life. Like, it used to be like there was always class separation. Right? But then it was like, when I went to school, obviously there was class separation, but everybody was still cool. And Kiki and Kanitle. And now it's kind of just like, no, we're too different. I'm here and you're there from both sides of the aisles. Like, the hood N. S. Don't want to hang out with the bourgeoisie. The bourgeoisie. The one hanging out with the hood. Niggas. The middle of the road. Niggas are still in the middle of the goddamn road. And it's like, what happened to sharing our experiences?
- [43:49]
Mecca
I think it's the rise of anti intellectualism and anti blackness. Because the thing is, this should not affect your empathy levels. Like, people are still people. People still struggle. Again, I'll take it back to you can't relate to. Never would have made it because your parents are doctors. You're a fucking idiot.
- [44:09]
Jameela
Like, what does that even mean?
- [44:11]
Mecca
What does that mean? You've never been through a hard time. I was playing. Never would have made it over a noop from nsu. Like, what the fuck are we.
- [44:22]
Jameela
That's fucking ridiculous.
- [44:22]
Mecca
What the fuck are we talking about?
- [44:25]
Jameela
Playing a noob to get over noop.
- [44:27]
Mecca
And I know. And I just found that out. Shout out to the bishop. Yeah, because he was at that feeling where you're trying to get them shoulders wet, girl. I said, not too much bishop. This is still a church.
- [44:43]
Jameela
And it's funny, like. Like I said earlier in the episode, you know, the people who are trying to vouch for the Ralph Lauren ad and all that, while having very significant points of, you know, being represented in that way, you guys are also, like, stepping into, like, uppity Negro ness. And it's funny as fuck because why are you getting on here? Like, the Ralph Lauren ad is quite. Why are you being so fucking uppity? This is why we be talking about y'. All.
- [45:11]
Mecca
I'm not gonna lie, bitch.
- [45:12]
Jameela
I ain't never heard nobody call that shit Ralph Lauren until today. Like, that might be the proper way, but I ain't never heard that shit until now. And it's like, y' all are like. Y' all be extras.
- [45:20]
Mecca
Like, it's only funny. Let me tell you why it's funny, especially as someone who has an uppity mom.
- [45:27]
Jameela
They're dead ass.
- [45:30]
Mecca
Like, no, no, no, no, no. If you like.
- [45:32]
Jameela
And that's why I can't take seriously.
- [45:33]
Mecca
And it's hard to take seriously if you've never really been exposed to it. But, like, please know, in all seriousness, they are serious.
- [45:41]
Jameela
I think there are some people that are. And I think there are some people that are putting on so that it. So that we can feel where they.
- [45:46]
Mecca
Come from a little bit. That's the piece that is what I' trying to say. I feel like you've been doing this a lot lately where it's like, I'll be trying to say something, but I'm not clear. But then you'll come in, you'll be like, oh, you'll explain it better. That's what I'm trying to say. If you actually have someone who is that uppity in your family, you can clearly tell when are fronting the up it t. Like, I'm telling you, as someone with an uppity mama who, when she gets called uppity, what's her bar, why don't you come on up with me? You know what I'm saying? Like, that is literally her personality. I can tell when you bitches are popping the camera up and this is not. This is not really you you're trying to put on for the camera. Because real uppity motherfuckers don't like, damn near don't give a fudge. Damn near not like a real uppity bitch is not finna even acknowledge the fact that non uppity motherfuckers hate this shit. Follow me.
- [46:41]
Jameela
And the thing is, you could also be from a upper middle class, you could be wealthy, you could be all of these things without also being an uppity arrogant asshole.
- [46:56]
Mecca
Some people like being uppity arrogant assholes. Just saying. I'm making my mom sound like a dickhead right now. But like.
- [47:03]
Jameela
No, but your mom is not like that.
- [47:05]
Mecca
She's not.
- [47:06]
Jameela
But she. Your mom is very sweet.
- [47:07]
Mecca
She's sweet.
- [47:08]
Jameela
Your mom is not what I'm talking about.
- [47:09]
Mecca
No, no, no, no.
- [47:10]
Jameela
Your mom is. She knows who she is. She's very educated. She is very much like the clear hustle like you said. But she's. I would not even call her like an uppity Negro. That's not what I would classify as an uppity Negro.
- [47:21]
Mecca
I think with people who are not secure in themselves, who might not come. I'm just saying what I've seen in my family, with my dad's side and just in the wild, people like my mom can rub folks the wrong way if. And again, not like you're saying, not because she's trying, but because in her conversation, sometimes it be like, is that shade what's going on? And if you're not like. And I feel like that's what happens on TikTok. You're not secure. That. And you feel like this Ralph Lauren ad is a dunk on you. You feel like it's. It's condescending towards you. And, and it. It's not necessarily that, but I do understand how it can be read as that. And I've just. I've just seen this interaction so many times with my mom.
- [48:13]
Jameela
I feel like the conversation y' all are having is valid. It just not. That's why I said it's not in context of this ad. I don't. That's. That's. I'm not seeing it with an ad. And I feel like you should have had the conversation outside of that, because then I think it would have landed a little bit better. Like, hey, what I've noticed is a lot of black people that come from wealth act in this certain very condescending way. Then you would have a point, because they do. And because I've been around a lot of, like, wealthy black people who. And there's a difference. There's a difference between black people who come into some money and black people who come from money. And honestly, it just depends on the. I don't know what it is about folks with money sometimes, especially the people who just stumble into some money. Why is you acting like this uppity Negro? It's. It's off putting.
- [49:04]
Mecca
It'd be the difference between Atlanta and Potomac housewives. I mean, I think that that is such a good display of, like, folks who are generationally in certain circles versus folks who just came into some, like, into some money. And even in how the women themselves act. I'm the granddaughter, you know, like, you have all of that versus Nene and Phaedra, who. Yes, Phaedra is bourgeoisie, but Phaedra is still very like country, you know what I'm saying? I'm from Athens, you know, like, you know, it's a different vibe. And I can see how if you're not aware of. Definitely comes off condescending, both intentionally and unintentionally. That's what I'm trying to say. But I do think it has a lot to do with, like, the person. Because again, you seeing an ad and feeling some type of way about an ad that aligns with Ralph Lauren's branding this entire time, I think that says more about you, to be honest.
- [50:02]
Jameela
I think that's. I think that's valid. And I also think that, like, the condescension, whether it be intentional or not, it really kind of comes from this level of just tone deafness. And a lot of people, when you don't ever have to experience a level of disenfranchise, a specific type of disenfranchisement, specifically coming from your class, you are just not socially aware of those things, especially if you're not grounded, if you're. If your parents, if your grandparents, wherever you come from, if they did not ground you in the things that, you know, people may not have. Like, for example, I didn't grow up poor, but I didn't grow up rich at all. Like I said, my very working class. But my parents did. My parents grew up poor. And so we were constantly reminded about the other side of that life. So I feel like I'm very aware of what I speak and the way in which I talk about things because I don't want to be that type of tone deaf person. Because you genuinely don't know. And people. The thing about Tone deafness is. It's not intentional. And that's the part that makes it so like, like you don't even know what the fuck you just said. Like, nigga, like, oh, my gosh. Like, sometimes y' all are very, very tone deaf about just the, the way in which people, like, exist. And y' all need to get some grounding. Y' all need to get some social awareness on you because, damn, what are y' all saying? Sometimes it's like, ain't nobody trying to hear that.
- [51:28]
Mecca
Well, I think that this has been a very informative conversation. If you're raising kids in the upper middle class, try to keep them grounded, you know, make them do community service or something so they don't get on the Internet sounding like dickheads when they're in high school and young adults, because that, that's what that comes down to. You've never seen anything. So, you know, expose your kids to.
- [51:51]
Jameela
All the walks of light if you.
- [51:53]
Mecca
Can, if you're able and willing, I guess. All right, well, we're gonna spin it.
- [52:00]
Jameela
We're gonna take a break.
- [52:04]
Mecca
This episode is brought to you by Greenlight. Get this, Adults with financial literacy skills have 82% more wealth than those who don't. From swimming lessons to piano classes, us parents invest in so many things to enrich our kids lives. But are we investing in their future financial success? With Greenlight, you can teach your kids financial literacy skills like earning, saving and investing. And this investment costs less than that. After school treat start prioritizing their financial education and future today with a risk free trial@greenlight.com Spotify greenlight.com Spotify and we're back. So this is our segment where we take your low down gutter snipe dirty situations and we give them a bit of a PR spin. We also will sprinkle some advice in there. Now keep in mind, Mel and I are not PR professionals. We just studied communications in undergrad. Don't forget to email at Unhinged and immoral. Podmail. Com. Include your races, your gender, sexual orientation. We said Jamila said she didn't want to hear your political takes but I want to know what you're registered as. What do we have this week, Jamila?
- [53:10]
Jameela
This one is rather short. It says hi Mecca and Jamila, I absolutely love you all's content and podcasts. It's like listening to my biggest sisters. I have less of a spinning and more of asking for advice. I am 23 and about to graduate college in May from HBCU. Of course I am Currently in a position that doesn't make me happy but will lead me somewhere. I have other available opportunities, but I don't want nor I don't want to nor know if I should leave here or stick it out. I don't feel I get to be my full self where I am now. But I don't want to be seen as a quitter. Please give me advice on this. And just being a college graduate about to go in the world. Thanks for making my day with y'. All. Pod Sanaya. She put her name, period. Hi, Sinaya.
- [53:57]
Mecca
Well, you want to start a break from finally. And mind you, me and Jamila are the perfect people to ask because we Both have had 50, 11 jobs.
- [54:05]
Jameela
Yes. Well, I was gonna say we can talk about.
- [54:10]
Mecca
I'm gonna quit a job. Okay, well, I'll let you start because I started last time.
- [54:15]
Jameela
Okay. So first of all, you didn't tell me what your career goal is. So I'll just be kind of speaking generally and I'll kind of use myself as an example. So I had a very specific career goal in mind. Right. I wanted to be in the entertainment industry blanketly because I do a couple of different things. I just wanted to be entertainment industry. Right. However, my career field is a little bit unique in the way of that. You don't just get on indeed and say, hey, any actors? Anybody need a director today? It's just not that easy. It's one of those things where you kind of have to like, scrub and scratch your way into it. So after graduating college, I'm like, well, what do I do? So my entire college career, I pretty much worked the same job. I worked at Avis Rental Car because my aunt works there for a long time. And that was kind of like my entry point. And then I worked there a little bit after college, and then I worked at the Coca Cola headquarters here in Atlanta, which, honestly was one of my favorite jobs. Was lovely. I've worked at Walmart for two weeks before quitting. I've worked at a warehouse for about three weeks before quitting. I've worked a couple of jobs, and my main goal, specifically after college when working these jobs. Now, this is going to sound a little crazy, but this is just the way my mind works. I deliberately did not want to work a job that I would like to too much because I didn't want to be complacent in that, and I did not want to get stuck in the corporate ladder as someone. I studied film and journalism, but there's a lot that you could do with those type of degrees, right? So there were a lot of opportunities that kind of came my way that I was like, they do pay very well. They have all those things. I think I would get used to it and it would force me to not be in my grind mode. And so I didn't take them. I made sure to work jobs that honestly, they didn't pay a lot. It was never the goal to just not get paid a lot. That's just kind of how it happened. But I would have a lot of like, wiggle room and I needed that wiggle room because I wanted to be able to pop on somebody's set if I was able to. I wanted to be able to put a lot of focus into my craft and I wanted to not be complacent and I wanted to really force myself to be uncomfortable so that I can keep pushing towards my goal. They don't work for everybody though. And it's not. It is not a peaceful situation. You are constantly. You're living paycheck to paycheck. Well, I was. I was living paycheck to paycheck and it was very stressful and it was very uncomfortable. But I used that uncomfort to literally just keep pushing it. And like. But I do hate hustle culture also. So that's just. It's, it's. It's a weird thing. You have to figure out where you're going. I say that the same. If the job you're working right now is directly correlated and tied to you getting to your goal, stick with it. If it's not and you can find something else better while you still work to your goal, do that. Because what's most important is you get to your goal. So the fastest, quickest, best way you can get there, do that without sacrificing your well being. I'm not a component for quitting your job and moving to Los Angeles only because, well, it's expensive. And I want you. I don't want you to have to struggle in the way of like literally panhandling just to pursue your career. You can, you. There's ways to do that without having to go to the extreme. It's not 1980 anymore. You know what I'm saying? Back in the day, you could do that and stumble upon a little coffee shop job and be cool, bitch. You try that now, you end up on skid row. Be careful.
- [57:55]
Mecca
Yeah.
- [57:57]
Jameela
Yeah.
- [57:58]
Mecca
Wow. That was a great spiel, Jameela.
- [58:01]
Jameela
Thank you.
- [58:02]
Mecca
I'm a little bit of the opposite. I have always had this sense that I was going to eventually be taken care of. And I, like, I've never aspired to labor, so I didn't have a dream job. I will say I knew I was going to be in the public eye. Jameela as my witness. I definitely thought I was just gonna end up being a rapper baby, mom, athlete baby. That was. That was the plan, A, B and C. So the jobs I worked, I made sure that I liked them and I could work them until that goal was met. With that being said, I've worked a lot of jobs. Odd jobs, but jobs that it's like, I really enjoyed showing up to work every day. Like, when I worked at Nordstrom, I liked working accessories. When I was planning weddings, I liked planning weddings. Like, I liked being. I liked being in the med spa business. I like being in the entertainment industry and doing this podcast. I think you should do something. I know there are goals, but I am definitely a little bit of the opposite in terms of doing something that you like and that can fund your lifestyle because you're going to be at work majority of your day. And every job that I have quit has been because I was miserable in that existence. And if I got to show up here five to six days a week for six to eight hours, that's most of your life. You should be happy with the people there, you should be happy with what you're doing, and you should be happy with what you're being compensated. Now, like Jamila said, if there is a very clear end goal for you, I think that you should stay with that. Don't know what that was, but if there's not and you're a little bit more like me, where it's like, I'm just going with the flow, I would definitely say go with something that you like doing because I know a lot of people, actually, because we're, you know, close 29, close to 30. Our friends are at the point where I. They don't necessarily like their jobs, but they're being paid so well and they're so used to their lifestyles that they're not going to quit. And that creates such a weird dynamic with your work life.
- [60:09]
Jameela
I also want to give a little bit of advice about kind of inching into different industries. Again, I don't know what industry you're trying to go off of because you did not give us that information. Shame on you.
- [60:21]
Mecca
Just kidding.
- [60:22]
Jameela
But a little bit of advice would be to really lean on your networking experience, because networking is going to hbcu.
- [60:31]
Mecca
So you have, like, a pretty Vast.
- [60:32]
Jameela
Network going to be your best friend. Go to different events that are centered around your industry. So for example, if you work in tech, like go to an Afro tech type of event, go to those black centered events that are within your industry and really mingle and get to meet people. Because going to an HBCU you should know this. People who also went to HBCUs are very keen on giving you opportunities. Just because you went to hbcu, it is kind of like a brother brother type shit. I don't know if you are in a Greek organization, but if you are, again, use that. Like people who see that you are a part of their organization or Even just in D9 in general sometimes are more keen to hear you out or give you opportunities. Use your resources and use your. Use the things that are around you, you know. Like you'd be surprised how you're able to move up based off of of who you know.
- [61:39]
Mecca
It's my mama always said it's not always what you know, but who you know. And I think the older that I get, the more I'm realizing that it's the talent will take you so far. But you know what can get you there without the talent? Knowing someone at the door. So imagine if you have both. You know, imagine if you have both.
- [62:03]
Jameela
Yeah, I actually always, I have the mindset of it's actually all of who you know and it's what you know that allows you to stay there. Because unfortunately that's just, that's just where we are. Especially depending on your industry, like who do you know? Like it just be like that. And a lot of times because even with corporate, because this, this matters within corporate too. A lot of the times when they are hiring for new positions, they fire in house first.
- [62:35]
Mecca
They always hire in house first.
- [62:36]
Jameela
So if you know the hiring managers, if you're cool with the people who are doing those things, you're going to know that they're hiring people way before they even release it to the public. So the same applies even within corporate. You need to be, this is what you have to get out of this. This is the mindset. Everybody, I need everybody to hear this. You have to get out of the mindset of I'm coming here so I won't get fined. You got to let that mindset go. When you are trying to really like inch up, you have to try to really stretch out all of this experience because you never know what else is going to happen. Right? You have to figure out while I'm here what can, like how can I maximize while I'm here. For an example, when I was working at Coca Cola. This is so crazy, y', all, because it, it actually pisses me off. But it's. There's a lesson here. When I used to work at the Coca Cola headquarters, I worked specifically in the event planning conference center, right? So we planned all the events that happened in the conference center. Really fun job, right? However, there was a film department in the Coca Cola headquarters where they would film commercials and things like that. Every day I would go down there and try to meet somebody new. One day I met one of the producers of the film department in Coca Cola. I'm chatting with them. I set up a whole meeting during. While I'm on the clock, one thing about it, and set up a whole meeting so that I could level up and move into that department. Because again, that's more so what I do production, right? And it ended up working out. I ended up scheduling a meeting with them to kind of talk about hiring. I kid you not. My meeting was scheduled for the Monday that our country shut the fuck down.
- [64:15]
Mecca
From COVID I didn't know that.
- [64:17]
Jameela
So I don't have a finishing of that store because everyone fucking went home after that, right? And we were gone for forever. And so at that point I kind of just moved on. But that's just an example of how you can try to like stretch out your resources within where you are at the time as well. Like think about. You have to keep thinking about the end goal. Don't think about where you are right now because you're just gonna stay right the fuck there. You need to make sure you connect with people. You need to make sure. Sometimes that means staying a little bit later because, you know, I know the CEO leave his office at 6:30 and I want to talk to him. Sometimes you have to do everybody.
- [64:55]
Mecca
You have to do a little bit of peeping. I have an example of right before COVID I had absolutely planned to move up the Nordstrom ladder. Much to Jamila's point. Nordstrom is a company that hires from within. If you want to become a manager, assistant manager, store manager, and you already work at the store, you have first foot in the door before anyone else. And a lot of times they actually don't even end up. I mean, they post it, but they're. They already know who they're going to hire when that happens. So I had all intentions of eventually somewhere in America having a store when new positions were come up. Right before COVID I was really interested in seeing what was going on in the HR department because I didn't, you know, store the numbers and how much the selling of the store. That was really hard. But I was like, you know what I could do? I could see what's going on in hr. I could work over there. And so when stuff would happen, I would talk to the HR ladies, kind of get a feel for it. And when positions would open up, I would ask, hey, is that position. I would ask my manager, can you see if that position at that store is open and see you have that connect there again. The country closed down, so I became a bottle girl. But, you know, networking and things of that nature. And honestly, I will say to my credit, working in bottle service gave me a whole. Nother level of network. Gave me a whole. Because it's like you're really in the wild with that one. You're really. And you're dealing with drunks and that's a different level of like parlay that you and. And people skills. So, you know, whatever people skills that you've cultivated at that hbcu, hopefully you've been involved in some organizations. Take it out to the workforce and use it to your credit with one of my little. Use it to your advantage. That's what I was gonna say for sure.
- [66:50]
Jameela
And think about ways to make you stand out against your competitors. Yeah, I hate that it is a competitive sport when it comes to, like your career. But unfortunately that's just kind of how it is. Everybody's on, indeed, everybody is applying for the job. Okay, so what can make you stand out? So think about ways to do that. Something I. And it's. It's annoying to do, but it's. It's such a good practice and it has worked in my favor so many times. Something you need to get good at is a follow up. You need to have a good follow up conversation. Because that first conversation is always great. People forget. You need to stay fresh on everybody's mind. So after I do an initial reach out, that initial like connection, whether it be in person, online or whatever, I'm going to follow back up because not only do I want you to remember that conversation, but I was dead serious about wanting to work work.
- [67:40]
Mecca
I was really dead. I took this advice from Dre. I forgot where he said it. Did he say it at the Urban League conference or he said it online? I literally can't remember. But he said when he first started working with brands and even now he will follow up with them directly outside of his team. So if it's like this happened it's like he'll follow up outside of his team, be like, thank you for having me. That's something that I've been doing. I said, oh, that's good, that's good. That's. That's why you're sponsored by LinkedIn. That's fucking good. Don't forget. And that's the thing that make people remember you be care. Charisma isn't something that can be taught per se, but you can definitely learn it. And as someone who's a little bit, not a little bit, a lot bit naturally charismatic, I, when I feel like it, Jamila will tell you I my social battery be drained at times, but when it's time to turn it on, I can definitely turn the charm on. And that has worked in my favor a lot in terms of making sure people remember who I am. Like following up. Oh yes, I did meet you. I remember meeting you. That matters. Yeah, well, good luck, Saniyah. Was that her name?
- [68:52]
Jameela
Super good luck, Saniyah. Yes, please tell us. I want to, I definitely want to follow up from you because this was. You graduated in May. That means you're just graduated.
- [69:00]
Mecca
Congratulations.
- [69:01]
Jameela
July, almost August. So I would definitely love for you to send us an update. Like, are you still with this job? What HBC did you graduate from? What is your career field? Give us a. Do you feel like you're in a.
- [69:11]
Mecca
In an elitist black way right now?
- [69:15]
Jameela
Let us know. I'm, I'm always. I love giving advice, guys. I really do. Especially when it doesn't have anything to do with niggas.
- [69:22]
Mecca
Please, more advice like this, less advice. Because we're always going to say leave that nigga.
- [69:29]
Jameela
Unless it's like super unique. Like have we, have we given an.
- [69:33]
Mecca
Example of, of telling someone not to leave though? I don't think so. I think we've said leave every time.
- [69:40]
Jameela
That's most times. Most case scenarios you do need to leave. The n do be needing to be left. Well, the only time we didn't say leave that nigga is when the nigga sent us his dick for that conversation. We did not have to say leave that nigga alone. We had to say leave that young bitch alone.
- [70:02]
Mecca
So Barnes don't send a follow up, but just know we're gonna reference you forever in that cock ring.
- [70:08]
Jameela
That's gonna be like a little unhinged.
- [70:10]
Mecca
Unhinged lore. Imagine if you start listening to this like in two years and we reference Barnes and a cock ring and you have no idea what we're talking about.
- [70:19]
Jameela
Like that's just gonna always be stamped in our history of foolishness. Like, yeah, we did have somebody send us dick pics, and he let us know that he uses cock rings. And he was messing two pictures too.
- [70:32]
Mecca
Imagine if we saw Barnes out in the street. I would have to.
- [70:35]
Jameela
I would scream, like, in horror.
- [70:37]
Mecca
No, no, no, no. If I seen Barnes in the wild, I would literally be like, barnes. I just. I would have to let him know I know it's him.
- [70:47]
Jameela
I would call Julius.
- [70:49]
Mecca
I would. I would call. I would let you call Julius. I would stand behind Julius. No, I would stand behind Julius.
- [70:56]
Jameela
I would feel like he came to, like.
- [70:57]
Mecca
And I'd be like, barnes, are you wearing your cock ring right now? I just want to know.
- [71:02]
Jameela
No, Barnes, unfortunately, you have to stay away from us in person. But I do hope you keep listening. Like, for sure. Like, keep supporting, but, like, I don't ever want to see you on what.
- [71:14]
Mecca
Came to our live shows.
- [71:15]
Jameela
Like, please don't like, unsolicited dick pics do scare me. Face and dick pics scare me even more. And you don't.
- [71:23]
Mecca
That nigga has a cock ring in the audience, though. Like, how do you know that? Yeah, I just know. Anyways, let's read these comments. We're gonna take a break. And we're back.
- [71:45]
Jameela
Alrighty, y'. All. We are gonna read some of Yalls comments from previous episodes. Remember to leave Yalls comments. We love engaging with you guys every chance we get. All right, I'm gonna read the Spotify. This is from celebrity parents. Oh, Lord. Auntie eyes getting worse. Takira Amari says random, but every time I go to the bathroom, I think about Jamila putting her teacher glasses. Come on, y'. All. Put in her teacher glasses once in a period. Trash. Like, why the fuck would you do that element for your love and you're down. Why would you bring that back up? But I'm so sorry to her.
- [72:26]
Mecca
That's a throwback.
- [72:26]
Jameela
Ed. Jason, Astro said, and Trump go ahead and make English the national language.
- [72:32]
Mecca
Okay.
- [72:33]
Jameela
What?
- [72:33]
Mecca
Trump made English America's. You know, we don't have an official language.
- [72:40]
Jameela
Are. Right. But is he saying that he should?
- [72:42]
Mecca
No, he's saying he did. I think he did. I'm not sure.
- [72:48]
Jameela
And Trump gonna go ahead and make English a national.
- [72:50]
Mecca
I think he said he was. I don't know if he actually has. Does that make sense?
- [72:55]
Jameela
Okay. Daisy said, as a Nigerian raised in America, especially in the south, I need the diaspora war people to live in community. In real life. I have so much appreciation for African Americans and the culture and vice versa. My African American friends have appreciation for my African culture because at the end of the day we black for real. Love this conversation. I felt like I was going crazy. All the stuff. Same girl. There was a lot going on child. Such an online thing. Alex Vanka1 says, I love listening to Yalls. I love listening to Yalls diaspora conversation because it truly is an issue of xenophobia on both sides. And being the first gen kid raised in the south, it's clear we have bigger enemies than each other. Also, watching Baddies Africa right now has been its own social experiment.
- [73:43]
Mecca
Why are you watching Baddies Africa? Please.
- [73:47]
Jameela
A slaughter says as a mean auntie aged woman from a long line of mean women, I can confirm there's mean and then there's mean. My family and I are lacking impatience and foolishness and can't be and can be blunt but never nasty for no reason. Nor do we victimize folks or pile on. It's an important distinction. I love both of your takes on things and love the podcast.
- [74:11]
Mecca
Thank you to the mean aunties. My auntie just called and was yelling at us yesterday. Darian hung up the phone. He said, I'm not dealing with this shit. And then she was like, I don't care that he hung up. Okay, Ray said, I see where Mecca was getting at with the Lisa Bonet.
- [74:34]
Jameela
Lol.
- [74:35]
Mecca
She does give hippie boho vibes. Thank you, Ray. I saw where I was getting that too. Y' all can call me Rachel.
- [74:41]
Jameela
True.
- [74:41]
Mecca
But don't get the Lisa Boho reference. I don't get it. Okay. Zay Tovanisha said, I am Mecca with being loud as fuck. I get it from my daddy side too. My daddy sister was just cussing us out yesterday. Jasmine World said, I watched the show faithfully. Thank you, Jasmine Check. Yes. Will said, Been waiting on this. This my hair washing pod. Oh, period. I like that, y'. All. As a podcast listener, I like that that we are now a part of people's routines because I have podcasts that are a part of my routine so that like makes me feel so good. Mario Roland 1269 said. My celebrity parents are Nene Leakes and Cedric the Entertainer. That is a black ass household you're gonna come from child and ooh, shit. What's that? What that say? Okay, Sony enter. Wait a minute. I just knew Jameela was going to say KWN was her. Oh, K1 was her stud crush. That's that girl who half Nigerian is a, isn't it? With the fade. Okay, I am right there with you sister. She is cute.
- [75:50]
Jameela
Well thank you guys so much again for watching. Only announcement I have is that you guys should be subscribed to our Patreon and you guys should go ahead and purchase some merch on unhingedemoral.com Bye.
- [76:01]
Mecca
See you next week.
- [76:04]
Jameela
Unhinged and Immoral is hosted by Jamila Bell and Mecca produced by Melissa D.
- [76:08]
Mecca
Montz and Diamond Imprint Productions, post production by Coco Lawrence, production assistant by Melanie.
- [76:14]
Jameela
D. Watson, music by Audi and Brooklyn.
- [76:17]
Mecca
Billionaires and graphics by Claudia Choi.