Mardi Gras in Mobile

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Unhinged & Immoral" Episode: Mardi Gras in Mobile

Release Date: March 6, 2025

Hosts: Jamila Bell & Mecca Evans
Production: Diamond MPrint Productions

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1. Celebrating Mardi Gras in Mobile

The episode kicks off with Jamila and Mecca Bell reminiscing about their experiences attending Mardi Gras in Mobile, Alabama. Mecca mentions that this was her first time experiencing Mardi Gras in Mobile as an adult (09:30). Jamila adds that Mobile holds a special place in her heart, having spent numerous summers there, making it feel like a "second home" (15:00).

Notable Quote:
Mecca shares, "This was like your what, second or third time coming to Mobile?" (09:22), highlighting their deep connection with the city.

2. Nostalgic Memories and Cultural Observations

The hosts delve into their past visits to Mobile, discussing how Mardi Gras in Mobile differs from the more widely known celebrations in New Orleans (10:32). Mecca recalls a previous visit during her college years, emphasizing that her understanding of Mobile has deepened over time (11:30). They discuss the city's rich history, including its ties to the military and its significance in African-American history (16:10).

Notable Quote:
Jamila remarks, "Mobile, Alabama, is the birthplace of Mardi Gras," clarifying common misconceptions about the celebration's origins (18:11).

3. Social Dynamics and Personal Relationships

The conversation shifts to social dynamics during their Mardi Gras outing, where they encounter younger girls being overly friendly and playful. Mecca reflects on how their age difference and demeanor affected interactions, with younger attendees mistaking them for locals (13:40). This leads to a broader discussion on relationships and personal boundaries.

Notable Quote:
Mecca humorously notes, "He kept like, we're gonna go to the show in New Orleans. He rescheduled it, like, four times," illustrating the frustrations of coordinating events with high-profile personalities (02:20).

4. Parenting Styles and Childhood Experiences

Jamila and Mecca share insights into their upbringing and parenting styles, touching upon financial literacy, discipline, and cultural expectations. They discuss the challenges of raising children with strong cultural and social awareness, especially in diverse environments like California (39:06).

Notable Quote:
Jamila states, "I think my ADHD has given me a superpower because I need to be stimulated," highlighting how personal traits influence their parenting approaches (41:55).

5. "Spin It Now" Segment: Listener Relationship Advice

In their signature segment, "Spin It Now," the hosts respond to a listener's dilemma about an on-and-off relationship. Jamila and Mecca offer candid advice on whether to continue the relationship or move on, emphasizing the importance of emotional awareness and setting boundaries.

Listener's Story:
A listener described a turbulent relationship with a 27-year-old man, who repeatedly breaks up and reconciles, leaving her emotionally drained (60:14).

Advice Given:
Mecca suggests, "I think she should leave this man alone," advocating for clarity and self-respect (63:07). Jamila reinforces the need to trust one's intuition and not invest further in a relationship that lacks stability (64:49).

Notable Quote:
Jamila advises, "Baby, rip the band aid off. Don't try and do a slow burn," encouraging decisive action to end unhealthy relationships (67:11).

6. Community Feedback and Listener Engagement

Post-advertisements, the hosts share and react to listener comments and reviews from various platforms like Apple and Spotify. They highlight nostalgic memories related to Michael Jackson's passing and its impact on their listeners, creating a sense of shared experience and community (80:03).

Notable Quote:
Listener Simone Taylor reminisces, "I was crying in the car with my parents, listening to the radio. The music stopped and they announced it. I started bawling," illustrating the deep emotional connections fans have with their content (81:00).

7. Upcoming Events and Future Plans

Wrapping up the episode, Jamila and Mecca announce their upcoming appearances in Dallas for the Desiree Fashion Show. They encourage listeners to follow them on social media platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and Twitter to stay updated on future events and content releases. The hosts also express gratitude towards their Patreon supporters, emphasizing its role in sustaining the podcast (85:44).

Notable Quote:
Mecca excitedly shares, "We'll be in Dallas for the Desiree Fashion Show," building anticipation for their next adventures (85:32).

8. Closing Remarks and Production Credits

The episode concludes with production credits, acknowledging team members and sponsors. Jamila and Mecca thank their listeners, encouraging continued support and engagement through subscriptions and social media interactions (87:30).

Summary Highlights:

• Nostalgic Experiences: Deep dive into Mardi Gras in Mobile and personal connections to the city.
• Cultural Insights: Exploration of Mobile's historical significance and social dynamics.
• Personal Relationships: Honest discussions on maintaining healthy relationships and setting boundaries.
• Parenting Discussions: Reflections on upbringing, discipline, and fostering social awareness in children.
• Listener Engagement: Sharing of poignant listener stories, reinforcing community bonds.
• Future Plans: Announcement of upcoming events and continued listener support through Patreon.

Overall, this episode of "Unhinged & Immoral" offers a blend of personal anecdotes, cultural reflections, relationship advice, and interactive listener engagement, all delivered with the hosts' signature unfiltered and dynamic style.

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Note: All timestamps refer to the minutes and seconds within the provided transcript.

Transcript

[Jamila]

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[Mecca]

Welcome back to another episode of Unhinged Anymore. I am tired.

[Jamila]

I am Jameela. Welcome back. Another week, another episode, more trips, more life.

[Mecca]

I was trying to think of what he said after the More Life intro.

[Jamila]

You know, I don't know.

[Mecca]

It's been a decade at this point. That shit came out in like, 2016. So.

[Jamila]

Yeah, I don't remember any of that.

[Mecca]

That's, like, scary to me. Up until I would say certified lover boy. I can remember every single point of what I was doing for Drake's like, albums.

[Jamila]

Well, you were.

[Mecca]

You know, I was Aubrey's Angels really bad even. Not even when he made the vacation.

[Jamila]

In the beats of music, the ripoff renaissance home.

[Mecca]

I hanging off my neck break masses the set rather than going down over back and forth with that.

[Jamila]

I see you liked it.

[Mecca]

I loved it. It was a great album.

[Jamila]

Oh, it just wasn't my flavor, you know, I. Yeah. Don't care.

[Mecca]

Yeah. I like legitimately tapped, like. And that when he was on tour for that with was the 21 Savage. That album can't. It's not. I didn't listen to it, but it just wasn't one of my favorites. And that's a tour that me and Sabrina tried to go to. And he kept like, we're gonna go to the show in New Orleans. He rescheduled it, like, four times. No exaggeration. And it got to the point where it was actually ridiculous. It was like, actually, give me my money back, Aubry.

[Jamila]

I don't think you're gonna give. He didn't give it.

[Mecca]

He didn't give a. Honestly. So it was like, that was going on. And then in the midst of that, that's when he was doing. Being super weird to Megan. And I was like, you know, it's been a rough, like, 15 years.

[Jamila]

I'm gonna bow out.

[Mecca]

I think I'm gonna. I think I'm gonna sit the fuck down.

[Jamila]

Yeah, it's. It. It just kind of be like that.

[Mecca]

It'd be like that. Like, you'd be like, you know, I really value you, but I can't do this anymore.

[Jamila]

I do love some of your music. However.

[Mecca]

However, comma.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

So now with everything else, like this last album, I like the song that makes me feel like I'm Dan. Like I'm one of the peanuts in the proud family movie dancing. You know which one?

[Jamila]

I think that's black house music.

[Mecca]

Yeah. I think it's Nokia. I think it's what it's called.

[Jamila]

Oh, you talk about his music specifically.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

So I actually listened to the full song, and I realized I don't like the whole song, so.

[Mecca]

Oh, okay.

[Jamila]

But the snippet on Tick Tock, I like that.

[Mecca]

Okay. Thanks, TikTok for just a snippet, I.

[Jamila]

Guess it was cute, though.

[Mecca]

I don't know which camera to look at.

[Jamila]

We're supposed to look at each other.

[Mecca]

Oh. Oh, you said I've been trying.

[Jamila]

We're in person now.

[Mecca]

I've been trying to. I've been trying to look into my camera.

[Jamila]

You're, like, being awkward, and look.

[Mecca]

I'm like, no, because I'm trying to. Cause so when we're not in person, y'all are always, like, looking to your camera, looking to your camera.

[Jamila]

And now is the day you want to try to look into the camera.

[Mecca]

Well, I always, like, if you haven't noticed, guys, I've been trying to look more into the camera lately.

[Jamila]

You've been trying?

[Mecca]

I really have. I think the effort is obvious.

[Jamila]

The effort has definitely been shown.

[Mecca]

Thank you.

[Jamila]

For sure. Sometimes the eyes start to wander to.

[Mecca]

The side, to the. To your laptop. But then I bring it back.

[Jamila]

Yeah, I think better we're in person. I'm going to be giving office tease. If I make a point, Boom.

[Mecca]

Okay, let's do that.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Oh, like Jim, like, oh, yeah, yeah. You know, I love the Office.

[Jamila]

Exactly.

[Mecca]

Their fucking stickers and shoot farms on my laptop.

[Jamila]

That's just the vibe I'm trying to give.

[Mecca]

If you were any character on the Office, who would it be? This is very millennial of us.

[Jamila]

But I have to ask Michael.

[Mecca]

That's accurate.

[Jamila]

I am Michael. I identify with him so much. I love him. He's my favorite.

[Mecca]

Okay.

[Jamila]

And I'm so him.

[Mecca]

I see a lot of myself in Dwight.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Really just little pieces.

[Jamila]

What pieces?

[Mecca]

I just don't like how Jim be playing with him. I really don't. And I feel like.

[Jamila]

But you're not that excited about everything.

[Mecca]

I'm not.

[Jamila]

You're more so like.

[Mecca]

But on the inside.

[Jamila]

Yeah. You know, but on the inside, you know, you have your California, like, dry tone.

[Mecca]

Like.

[Jamila]

Yeah. So I did this thing the other day.

[Mecca]

Yeah. But I'd be excited, like, but on my inside, that's. That's what I feel on the inside. Even though it's, like, comes out, like, that's how passionate I am.

[Jamila]

It's just like, how do you guys stay right here in this pocket like, all day long?

[Mecca]

Well, I don't sound like that.

[Jamila]

I be like, it really is a California thing for it just to kind of fry.

[Mecca]

Is it?

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

I don't even smoke like that.

[Jamila]

You do.

[Mecca]

You smoke way more than me.

[Jamila]

No, fry. Vocal fry.

[Mecca]

Oh, the vocal girl. I was like, what the hell are we talking about?

[Jamila]

Weed? No. Are you high?

[Mecca]

I did take edible last night.

[Jamila]

Okay.

[Mecca]

So maybe that's why I was so tired.

[Jamila]

Yeah, possibly.

[Mecca]

You see my office? Hey, what can I say, yo? I took an edible and had the craziest church. Church kid. Memory unlocked. I have to play this for y'all. I haven't heard this song. And when I say, I swear to you, I have not heard the song in 15. 15 years. And this used to be my favorite church song. And when I say the ancestors used to sing it through me, because there's no way I should have been eight years old and so passionate about this song.

[Jamila]

I have to play this and so were you dreaming about the song?

[Mecca]

No, I was scrolling on TikTok and somewhat like, for whatever reason, this is like a trending sound, like it's becoming a trend. It's so weird. But it's like, has nothing to do with the song. This is an old New York spiritual. Okay. If you grew up in, like, a small, like, black Baptist Koja church, this is what the old the elder saying.

[Jamila]

Is it, I'm a soldier in the army of the Lord.

[Mecca]

That. That's a bop, too.

[Jamila]

But, no, I'll be buried in my grave. That's an old one. To my Lord and behold, that's literally a slave song.

[Mecca]

I have not thought about this song.

[Jamila]

Why is that trending on TikTok? And I know there's white kids singing it. Y'all ain't even supposed to know that exists.

[Mecca]

It's supposed to be like the.

[Jamila]

They sung that if they seen that at people's funeral when they used to have it in a box, like, when they didn't have real caskets and they just had that box hammered.

[Mecca]

Every song at church and. Yeah, and now y'all sing jeans and beanies. Church music. And that's why I can't get behind it, because I like the shit like that. No, I was, like, 8 years old singing that.

[Jamila]

I bet you were.

[Mecca]

And I just feel like it was the ancestors, because I used to go.

[Jamila]

And before I be a slave, I'd.

[Mecca]

Be buried in my grave.

[Jamila]

Yeah, I was jumping off them. Shit.

[Mecca]

They.

[Jamila]

Would you have jumped? Or would you have just said, ah, let me see where they take me?

[Mecca]

I would have seen.

[Jamila]

I would have to see.

[Mecca]

I would have to see.

[Jamila]

I would have to see where they would.

[Mecca]

I respect everyone who jumped. Like, I really.

[Jamila]

I just want to see what's going on.

[Mecca]

I just want to see what's going on. And then also, I'm afraid of, like, violent demise. Yeah. I would have done the thing, like, taking a poison. One of those. I don't want to.

[Jamila]

I would have probably died on that ship from claustrophobia.

[Mecca]

Because I'm extremely, honestly, that. Oh, no, no. Like, in all seriousness, I would have.

[Jamila]

Been up out of there because that.

[Mecca]

Little aluminum foil plane I was on coming here, which. No, I'm going southwest on the way back, was like. I was. I was a bit uncomfortable, so I can only imagine. I can't. Honestly.

[Jamila]

I would have had to see. Would have lift, and I'd have been like, well, what all we got to do? Then I'd be like, oh, y'all beating us. Ah, I'm gonna have to leave in the morning. Who want to come with me? I would have for sure try to get out.

[Mecca]

Yeah. So mind you, I'm on your couch in the air, like, zooted. I'm near sleep, and I'm just trying to scroll to the end till it's like, okay, I can't scroll anymore. That comes up, and it freaks me out because I haven't heard that song in, like, 50 was going to be about it. I know. I was just like, oh, my God. And like, just all these memories of like sinking next to my grandparents and shit was like. I was like, this is crazy. Anyway, love that song. And let's get back to our roots. Black people jeans and beanies in the churches. Crazy.

[Jamila]

Back to the question I asked 30 minutes ago. So we just left Mobile for Mardi Gras.

[Mecca]

Mardi Gras in Mobile.

[Jamila]

So this was like your what, second or third time coming to Mobile?

[Mecca]

Probably my fourth.

[Jamila]

No way. It's been four times.

[Mecca]

Yeah, because you're not accounting for the times I went in college and then also this is my second time in adulthood.

[Jamila]

When did we go in college? I know we went the one time when my cousin had the white baby mama. So that was one. Then we had the second time when.

[Mecca]

We get out of here.

[Jamila]

Then we had the second time, which is when we had end up driving to Pensacola when we went to go see Autumn. And then this would be the third time you came. I don't think you came another time. I think you're thinking of Atlanta.

[Mecca]

I might be thinking of Atlanta.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Or maybe I'm thinking of when I saw. Because I'm thinking of. I'm. I'm measuring it by when I see your arm. Aunts and I have seen them in Texas. So maybe that's.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

What it is.

[Jamila]

Yeah. Was this your first Mardi Gras in general?

[Mecca]

This was my first Mardi Gras in Mobile.

[Jamila]

Okay, so you've been to New Orleans Mardi Gras before?

[Mecca]

Not in like an adult way. In like a passing through way.

[Jamila]

What does that mean?

[Mecca]

Like, we had a layover for a day. We went outside and it wasn't like. It wasn't like what we did.

[Jamila]

Okay, okay. So you didn't really get the full.

[Mecca]

It was just like a layover, like a day layover. And it's like, okay, let's go out to eat or something thing. And then it just so happened to be. It just happened so happened to be during Mardi Gras.

[Jamila]

That's actually a finesse.

[Mecca]

Because, Lord, it really was a finesse. But again, since we had a flight in the morning, we couldn't really, really do too much. Do too much. So we really just like. I don't even think we went to Bourbon Street.

[Jamila]

You probably wouldn't have, but we wouldn't.

[Mecca]

Have been able to like get out or anything. It would have been like an all night affair. We literally just went and I don't even know where we went. This was before I was like familiar with New Orleans, like at the level that I am now. So I wouldn't be able to tell you where we went, but even the little place we went to was still rocking. I'm sure it was still. What was this?

[Jamila]

Like, what year?

[Mecca]

Probably like 17 or 18. The years are. The fact they were going to be 29 fucking ill. Also. My 20s are starting to bleed together.

[Jamila]

Like, you know what I'm saying?

[Mecca]

Like, what year was that?

[Jamila]

Yeah, at one.

[Mecca]

That was when I was a. Back in 2016. Summer 16.

[Jamila]

Everything sounds so far away, but so close together at the same time.

[Mecca]

Like someone said when they said every time they bring up summer 16 or some like a song that more so of that era, like Work. And I'm like, this was like almost 10 years ago.

[Jamila]

I can't.

[Mecca]

Cuz I literally remember the first time I heard Work. I was in my apartment in college and I was like, oh, this is a bop.

[Jamila]

I like this.

[Mecca]

I like it. No, you. I like. You listen to a song.

[Jamila]

Wa.

[Mecca]

Like, yeah, yeah. You know how some songs have to grow on you. That was a hit off like, hit like grip. Instantly I heard it. I was like, oh, like Monique in the. No. The lady in the subway.

[Jamila]

No, literally, it was definitely an immediate hit. I think all the songs were media hits on that. We were just also just outside. We were just ready to.

[Mecca]

We were just. We were just pressed and. And you know what the other thing is? I was literally thinking about this when we were standing in the club and Mobile, how the younger girls in the club. I feel like we looked like we were irritated and I really wasn't. That's why, like, especially when my drink hit, I was trying to look less irritated because even though I was like, this is not hitting, but I was like, look at how fun the young girls are having. Like, look at how excited they are to be here. And I was like, I remember when we were like, like, so we're trying to get into the club. It's packed out. We're not. And Jamila and I aren't. I won't say cloud chasers, but we don't really be being like, oh, what?

[Jamila]

I just feel like I'm just.

[Mecca]

Well, I live in Houston, so people do that.

[Jamila]

People definitely.

[Mecca]

Even.

[Jamila]

No, I've seen people do that. And it's just like, I am not about to go up to somebody's door and be like, I'm Jamila.

[Mecca]

Do you know who I am?

[Jamila]

You better. Because they're gonna be like, who? And then I'll be Looking stupid. Right. I don't think I'll ever actually be on that. And I feel like it's hits more when they just come and grab you like they did.

[Mecca]

Like they did. So we're standing in line, and in the midst of us standing in line, when I say, like, 15, clearly girls under 23 were, like, cutting us. And it was the way Jam and I were saying there, like some teaches. He go ahead, baby, go ahead.

[Jamila]

The line ain't moving.

[Mecca]

Feel free if you want to.

[Jamila]

You go ahead and jump, baby. I'm not tell.

[Mecca]

Like, when they thought they was doing something and then the girl just happened to, like, come and be like, why are y'all? Why are y'all standing here? Y'all wait for TikTok.

[Jamila]

Grabbed her arms and took us.

[Mecca]

And it was the way they looked. And I just said, bye, babies.

[Jamila]

Bye. See you. And shot.

[Mecca]

Just learn the lesson. Ain't never gots to do too much.

[Jamila]

I was like, wow. And it was. I don't know, it was kind of like, heartwarming since we were in Mobile because it's like, you were like.

[Mecca]

Cause you were like, so from here.

[Jamila]

Well, no.

[Mecca]

Well, your people are.

[Jamila]

Yes. It's a difference.

[Mecca]

It is a difference. But I'm saying, like.

[Jamila]

But I love Mobile.

[Mecca]

So familiar with Mobile. Yes.

[Jamila]

I feel like even that downtown strip we.

[Mecca]

Rose. I was. We were just talking about how we had road scooters. Well, we weren't riding scooters. Your parents were riding scooters that one time?

[Jamila]

Yeah, it's. It's weird. It's like, you know, I. I've. I would say I kind of have grown up ish in Mobile because I was there for so many summers. I just. I've been there so many times. Like, it is. It does kind of feel like a second home. It feels so familiar to me.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

That is like, this is kind of like home as well. And so having. That was. That was pretty cool. And it was funny. Some of the girls who were coming up to us and saying, like, oh, you know, so glad to see ya. Da, da, da. And then it'd be like, why are you here? And it's like, that's so funny. I never thought I would be asked, why are you. Am I in this city? Because, like, I'm so. Like this. Nobody ever even knows about the city. But I guess I understand their thinking. Like, nobody really does know about Mobile in that way. Especially if you're not from the south or if you're not from.

[Mecca]

I always knew about Mobile because isn't it, it's not. No. Montgomery is To Kill a Mockingbird, I believe, but it's like the setting of like a historical book that I read.

[Jamila]

Oh, it's a lot of really interesting.

[Mecca]

Histories, I was going to say, because.

[Jamila]

It'S where the last slave ships were.

[Mecca]

Dropped, the last slaves came through Mo. Like it's a historical city and I can't remember.

[Jamila]

Yeah, there's a lot of ties to the military as well.

[Mecca]

Yo, I had the Mobile historian. My, I took a video of him. I'm not going to show that one to y'all, but he was telling me all about Joe Kane and all the things. But yeah, it's not surprising that Mobile, like I've read heard of it before I met you.

[Jamila]

Yeah. Whenever I tell people like my, my dad is from Mobile, they'll be like, where's that? You know, Deep South. It's always like a. Oh, you, you would just. But again, the people from the, the Gulf area, the Gulf coast, everybody in the Gulf coast knows the Mobile is. Because it's, it's a very prominent city. It's a very prominent black city too.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

Black as hell. However, my God, as many times if I have been in Mobile, I have never in my life seen that many white people on the other side of downtown. I was gagged, truly.

[Mecca]

Well, we did walk through Cocker.

[Jamila]

It was. But I've never in my life seen that many white people.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

I said, where the hell do y'all live? They must have came from Pensacola or something, cuz I was like, y'all live here? What part of town y'all stay in? K.B. tomaville. K.B. pritchard.

[Mecca]

Pritchard. They were talking about Pritchard and Uncle Ronnie was talking about Pritchard. Richard. Y'all up them water funds. We done heard of all the Mobile tea yet hanging out.

[Jamila]

People was giving us all the tea.

[Mecca]

Yes, they done sucked up the water in Pritchard then. People got thousand dollar water bills. They done ran off with the money.

[Jamila]

A miss.

[Mecca]

I wanted to say that in the comments.

[Jamila]

Country, old school country. I tried.

[Mecca]

They said, y'all coming to Pritchard. I said, y ain't got no damn water. According to Uncle Ronnie.

[Jamila]

Next time though, I'm gonna go to the Pritch bread. I, I, I've heard so many good things and I'm, I'm, I like, I like.

[Mecca]

I don't know if you were, I don't know if that was happening in your comments. The New Orleans and the Mobile was beefing in my comments, child.

[Jamila]

Yeah. I had made a video, I think the video I had made when I was basically saying, like, oh, I'm heading to Mobile for Mardi Gras, something like that, I had a lot of people saying, why are you going there? Come to New Orleans. No, why would you mean, why am I coming here? Why are y'all asking that like that? Like, that was just y'all acting. Like I said, I'm going to Oakland for Mardi Gras. I said a very. Let me look into the camera and say this. Mobile, Alabama, is the birthplace of Mardi Gras.

[Mecca]

No, you gonna bring him in. The comments on, that's all I got.

[Jamila]

And y'all. And y'all know that. That's like, y'all, we don't give a damn. It's too ain't Nola. Well, baby, nobody said it was Nola. We just said it was the birthplace. So after I seen a lady on.

[Mecca]

Twitter, Enola, with a big fat white ass. Now, I don't know if she was light skinned or white, but I know her yeast infection is going to be.

[Jamila]

Oh, baby, that pulse finna burn because.

[Mecca]

She let a man stick. First of all, she had. I got.

[Jamila]

They threw a cake on top of that ass.

[Mecca]

I got 17 miles of ass crack. She had 37. First of all, I'm not mad at it. That's a lot of ass, but that's a lot of cake and a lot of fingers. Why would you let someone stick their finger in your ass? I did not see. I didn't see anything like that in Mobile.

[Jamila]

No.

[Mecca]

That's what my Uber driver said. We don't, we don't do that here in Mobile. That wouldn't have been allowed.

[Jamila]

We're going to take a break. Hey, Jamie McDonald here. This is my brand new song. Oh, God, I'm desperate down on my knees Please send help from heaven Cuz that's what I need I need heaven and I Desperate, desperate oh, I need heaven. Be sure to check out my breakout single, Desperate on all streaming platforms.

[Mecca]

And we're back.

[Jamila]

It was a good time, though. Did you have fun?

[Mecca]

I had a lot of fun. I had a lot of fun.

[Jamila]

What do you think of Mobile as a city?

[Mecca]

I mean, this was like, not my first time there, so it wasn't like I was shocked. Obviously seeing the. Seeing you get lobbed in the head with a box of moon pies was a bit shocking.

[Jamila]

Yeah, but not my first time.

[Mecca]

Yeah. No. I mean, you seemed like a vetted pro at that.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

But I. I realized I don't like Moon pies, which is a take. It is. I mean, I didn't. I was really excited to eat. I just didn't like it. I don't know. That was my first time having it. I don't know what I thought it was. It's like a cookie in between.

[Jamila]

That's marshmallow.

[Mecca]

I don't.

[Jamila]

It's kind of like a s'more.

[Mecca]

I don't like marshmallows.

[Jamila]

Ah, well, there you go.

[Mecca]

There we go. I'm not a marshmallow girly. I'm not a s'more lady.

[Jamila]

Do you guys like moon pies? Let us know.

[Mecca]

I don't even think y'all like moon pie.

[Jamila]

I've never actually seen a moon pie outside of moon.

[Mecca]

I was going to say. And I've heard of moon pies. I've never physically seen a moon pie.

[Jamila]

For New Year's Eve, they do a moon pie drop.

[Mecca]

Y'all are not eating that many moon pies.

[Jamila]

I. Mobile has to be like, the national city of moon pies.

[Mecca]

Because the thing about it is, I. Moon pies, they just can't be this relevant. Like, I feel like they are in Mobile.

[Jamila]

Like.

[Mecca]

I know, but I'm saying, like, moon pies are probably like the candy, like the sweet, sweet treat of the 60s. And that's what it gives. Like, you know, we're just in a time capsule here.

[Jamila]

I'm so glad I got some home because I never. I literally only get them when I'm in.

[Mecca]

I mean, I'm glad that it's nostalgic for you. I'm not a moon. I just want to. I. I will probably dress as a moon pie next.

[Jamila]

Next time I go, what does that mean?

[Mecca]

I want to have a moon by costume. I'm serious. I saw a lady in a moon pie jersey and I was like, that's good.

[Jamila]

As in, you want to be, like, round.

[Mecca]

No, I want. I'm going to make a moon pie costume.

[Jamila]

Like, the shirt's gonna have moon pies on it.

[Mecca]

Possibly. Or I will physically be an actual moon pie. I can get cardboard and styrofoam and make a costume.

[Jamila]

You're not walking with me in the streets with that.

[Mecca]

Why? It would be so fun and people would know exactly what I was.

[Jamila]

You just. You just. Too much space. You saw how many people it was out there. You want to get a big ass moon pie box and walk around?

[Mecca]

Well, I could be a box. I would be a thinner. I was thinking, like a round moon pie, but I could be a box.

[Jamila]

That'd be easier you dressed like that. You need to be on somebody float.

[Mecca]

Maybe like I would just.

[Jamila]

We could have been on the float. Yes.

[Mecca]

Or.

[Jamila]

Yeah. Yesterday. But we left early so.

[Mecca]

Wow.

[Jamila]

That was the black parade yesterday too Dawn. Yeah.

[Mecca]

We had to get back to record and we had, we had to get.

[Jamila]

Back to do so many things. I had to think, I had to be away from crowds. I needed to pack, I need to decompress. I needed to get my hair hair done. My God, I had so many things to do.

[Mecca]

Plus Jamila drove. And then when we get to Houston on Wednesday, I'm driving, which I am scared of. Why you're.

[Jamila]

You're just a new driver. You know, like I've been driving since I was 15.

[Mecca]

Okay. And we got our licenses 10 years apart.

[Jamila]

Right. You said that, that like that was.

[Mecca]

Five because we're about to be 29. It's been like five years or four years at this point.

[Jamila]

That's new baby.

[Mecca]

I mean I've only gotten two.

[Jamila]

And you can tell when there's a new. You can tell when you're in the car with a new driver just based off of their mannerisms, the way you touch things. I'm like, ah, she's still new. And I just have to clinch and look out the window like please.

[Mecca]

The only thing that I think gives me a little bit more less new driver vibe is the fact that I did learn how to drive in Texas. Because driving in other states at least driving California, my mom was like, you're a very defensive driver. You're an aggressive driver. I was like, thank you. You have to be driving.

[Jamila]

You thought that was a good thing?

[Mecca]

Well, I don't mind playing chicken. You're gonna fucking let me in this lane. And if you drive in Houston, you know how to do that. You have to do that. You know, you're an itched every, every fucking day on the road.

[Jamila]

And that's why I'm scared.

[Mecca]

So shout out. Shout out to 610 288.

[Jamila]

Just please keep both hands on the waist.

[Mecca]

Have you been. Remember in Coolis when Stacy dashing her drive and they get on the highway and it's like ah. She's like screaming, no shit. That was literally me the first time I got on the highway. Cuz I was obviously in the car by myself and I was grown and I, you know, there was no one in there with me. I was just vibing. That was very scary.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

And I.

[Jamila]

And I was driving shortish distance.

[Mecca]

Three and a half hours. Isn't that short It's a straight shot.

[Jamila]

Well, don't make me more scared.

[Mecca]

I mean it's not. I think it's just flat. It's no hills or nothing like that.

[Jamila]

Now what that got to do with anything? You can't drive on a hill.

[Mecca]

I wouldn't want to drive on.

[Jamila]

Oh, Mecca, please.

[Mecca]

When I. I don't whenever me we go to San Francisco to take my dad to the doctor during 10 hours to drive.

[Jamila]

So you still scared of.

[Mecca]

I don't want to drive up hills and I don't like that in general. No, I'm not a fan of that. Even when someone else is driving. I don't like that. I don't like that feeling.

[Jamila]

Well, San Francisco heals all a little bit different.

[Mecca]

I was gonna say that's like going literally like vertically.

[Jamila]

When we were there for like 24 hours and we stood on the bottom of that street and I looked up.

[Mecca]

And the street looked like it was like this. That shit is crazy.

[Jamila]

I'm gonna ride the bike down there.

[Mecca]

Everyone in the bay learns how to drive because if you can drive in San Francisco, you can drive anywhere.

[Jamila]

Do they have to have a special type of gear to get up that hill? I don't think you have to talk.

[Mecca]

The thing is you literally have to know the like. So it's. It's a different type of driving. You have to know the gears.

[Jamila]

Oh, I don't do gears.

[Mecca]

And when you drive like when you park, you gotta know to emergency park emergency brake and turn the wheels left or right depending on if you're parking up. There's hella rules. That's why I'm like, I'm not. And see, I don't live in California. I didn't learn how to drive in California. So I don't. And I don't be in San Francisco enough to know how to drive out.

[Jamila]

Yeah, Santa Fran gonna have to miss me. I'm have to get on that bus or something.

[Mecca]

I mean you can, you can drive.

[Jamila]

Into them little Charlie things, what they call.

[Mecca]

Well, you can get on Charlie or you can get in the bar, which is like the subway out there.

[Jamila]

Yeah, I ain't doing all that whipping.

[Mecca]

And woven hell no dirty to drive this car. I'm not doing this.

[Jamila]

I'll be scared to drive with Darrington too. Just cuz he's cuckoo.

[Mecca]

Well, he is.

[Jamila]

And I feel like he'd be like, yeah.

[Mecca]

And I'll be like, oh, that definitely do be.

[Jamila]

Yeah, I already know.

[Mecca]

But he's a. He's a subic driver. He's he. He definitely drives like a boy.

[Jamila]

And that I don't like boys like.

[Mecca]

You gonna get there. You gonna be like, is this supposed to be three hours? It's been two hours and 10 minutes.

[Jamila]

It's very scary. Have you ever been inside of a car with a nigga? Now, I. I fair warning. This is abuse. However, have you ever been inside a car with a. Y'all just got an argument, and that nigga drive like, y'all finna drive off a cliff. Scariest shit ever.

[Mecca]

You just be like, no.

[Jamila]

Oh, just me. No.

[Mecca]

Oh, my ex didn't know. Our arguments were always pretty stationary and in the car. I am definitely a drama queen when it comes to. Because the thing is, I don't like to argue, like, contrary to. Even though I'm a very excitable person and I'm on 10. I'm on 10 with, like, joy. Like, when it comes to arguments, I get very quiet. So, like, that never happened. Because if we were in an argument, I'd be in the car, like, silent as fuck. I'm one of them.

[Jamila]

Yeah. No. So I've been in. Well, like I said, it is abusive.

[Mecca]

Yeah, that's scary.

[Jamila]

It is very scary.

[Mecca]

I'd be like, slow down.

[Jamila]

Oh, I don't say a ass thing. Because please, I say something. I feel like I open the door. Let me just. You just. You start to disassociate. Be driving off fast. Head be hitting the goddamn window. Cause they turn it so goddamn fat, Bow. And you got to just stare outside and disassociate.

[Mecca]

Like, I began to pass out, and.

[Jamila]

It'S really not funny.

[Mecca]

But a praying grandmother.

[Jamila]

I know somebody out there could relate.

[Mecca]

I sure as a cake. I used to be like, don't say a ass thing to me right now.

[Jamila]

Yeah. I'm not an arguer.

[Mecca]

We're gonna take a break.

[Jamila]

Amber back. I love moon pies. I think they're perfect. They're perfect. You have snack. Are there moon pies outside of Alabama?

[Mecca]

Do they sell them Cali?

[Jamila]

Yeah, they do.

[Mecca]

I've had to see the moon pie during the pandemic.

[Jamila]

I was getting them at the gas station, like, every.

[Mecca]

You know what that does give? Yeah, I can.

[Jamila]

That checks. That checks.

[Mecca]

And within, like. But you know what's also why I wouldn't have never gone over there. My mother was very just. She didn't like processed snacks, so we weren't allowed to have tw school teacher. It's not good for you.

[Jamila]

You can go to the corner store, get. Let me tell y'all we could.

[Mecca]

We could go to the corner store. But this just brings back up on that.

[Jamila]

So many memories. When we were living in Beaumont, there was corner store within walking distance of a house. It might still be there, it might not. I don't know. But this was my corner store snack that I would get every single time I would go to the corner store and I would get a Star Crunch and a pickle. Star Crunch is the best though. You God damn it, Melissa. You know everything.

[Mecca]

She got a Star Crunch yesterday. On the way. On the way.

[Jamila]

I needed because I was trying to catch one at the parade. I never caught one, so I had to get my fix.

[Mecca]

See, yeah, that falls in line with all them Ho Ho Twinkie ass snacks. You know what I did used to like? And once I got a hold of them, I would. I would devour boxes. Really? But you know what? Let me tell you why I didn't really eat them. Cosmic brownies. Put that on the table. The reason I couldn't get into them type of snacks is because they discontinued now. But my mom would buy the Philadelphia cheesecake bars. Do you know about those?

[Jamila]

I'm pretty sure my dad loved those.

[Mecca]

I'm.

[Jamila]

Because he's a sweet tooth kind of.

[Mecca]

Yes, I'm. I. We used to have quality sweets at the house. So that was the other thing. We didn't have Ho Ho's and that type of. Because my mom was buying like actual sweet treats.

[Jamila]

Oh, we stayed with a processed snack. My dad is a. A sweet man in that way. And so we stayed with the Ghirardelli's.

[Mecca]

Chocolate with the caramel. Like that's what I'm saying.

[Jamila]

You're a daily. What the.

[Mecca]

My parents were old and my mom didn't want that process ass.

[Jamila]

Imagine we're coming to your house as kids. Hey Mecca, do you have any snack? I got some ur Dairy chocolate like your up.

[Mecca]

I want some cheese and the linden truffles. We used to. My mom. Yeah, my mom used to keep a. Keep a bag of the linden.

[Jamila]

That is so grown.

[Mecca]

I've been 65 my whole life. I want a.

[Jamila]

We got some pecans in the back row.

[Mecca]

I love. I love the beast and pecans is good as hell. Just a straight pecan.

[Jamila]

Ew, A buttered pecan. We had a pecan tree in our house in Beaumont too.

[Mecca]

I hate when they sugar like they do them in the ice cream.

[Jamila]

Just disgusting. They taste like the tree they came off of.

[Mecca]

They're nuts. Well, I eat a lot of nuts.

[Jamila]

Nah, they taste like bark. And dirt.

[Mecca]

Well, then not the sugar kind. That's not what I'm talking about.

[Jamila]

Do. God damn it. Do a pecan grow out the tree sugary.

[Mecca]

Or do you like cashews? No, we used to eat a lot of chocolate covered cashews too.

[Jamila]

I only like almonds.

[Mecca]

I'm not a big almond, girl.

[Jamila]

I like a pistachio.

[Mecca]

Yes. I think it's because you like to crack open. Because my. The way my mama would sit there and crack pistachios open.

[Jamila]

Or sunflower seed. That's real country.

[Mecca]

That's ghetto. Yeah.

[Jamila]

I had them on. I had them on the drive.

[Mecca]

Shout out to my cousin Diane. She used to braid my hair green growing up. She. She eats sunflower seeds like you. And this is such a throwback. When she had like the house computer, she would have that desk and she'd be on that computer doing what she doing. And I say that that pile of sunflower seeds go up.

[Jamila]

Let me tell you something.

[Mecca]

Well, cigarette right here.

[Jamila]

Like, you know, it is kind of a.

[Mecca]

It can get, girl, real quick.

[Jamila]

I've ever seen sunflower seeds outside of the hood necessarily. Or they play baseball. Yeah, because it's like. It almost helps with like ticks.

[Mecca]

I feel like you gotta put a wall in your cheek.

[Jamila]

Like it's chewing tobacco.

[Mecca]

Let me tell you something. If you like sunflower seeds, if you like to chew ice, you like to chew a lot of gum. Look, you might be a little tizzle. Because it's a stem.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Oh, I.

[Jamila]

Stems down. What's your favorite stem?

[Mecca]

I go through phases with my stems. Because sometimes I'll just like. If it's a popular phrase at the moment, I have to say it all the time.

[Jamila]

Yeah. You don't stop.

[Mecca]

I would, you know that I just ignore you. Yeah. I'll have to like repeat it over and over again. Or I don't really have anything. I'll chew a pack of gum straight. Yeah.

[Jamila]

You ate a whole pack of gum on the way. I was, you know, I was driving and I'm like, did this because once.

[Mecca]

It lose flavor, I gotta.

[Jamila]

I'm like, she's. She's insane.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

Interesting.

[Mecca]

And then I go through phases with like the type of nuts or type of little snacks I eat kind of that you like. I like. I'm a big fan of cashews. I like a different type of nut, thicker nut. Nut needs to be cleaned, though. I don't like a nut that's dirty. I like to drink my nuts with my water.

[Jamila]

You know what? And that'll Be the end of that.

[Mecca]

I want to taste the fruit that.

[Jamila]

You'Re eating in the nut, please.

[Mecca]

I don't want to taste no lean nut. All them boy drugs.

[Jamila]

I'm gagging and not in a good way.

[Mecca]

Okay, I'll stop because I know you.

[Jamila]

Had about three more.

[Mecca]

I was going. It was going to get disgusted. All right, filthy. We can keep going.

[Jamila]

I am trying to think of the stems that I do. I honestly have to ask my siblings. They clock me more than I clock myself. But I am a nail picker and a nail biter. I have been my entire life, and I don't think I ever will stop. I fidget my fingers a lot. I never stop moving my hands. Like, I just.

[Mecca]

My mom doodles. Like, when I say, like, I grew up, you know how everyone used to send letters a lot? She would have the envelopes. She would just sit there and doodle on all the envelopes and draw these boxes. I can see the way she does them to this day. Just like she used to draw boxes.

[Jamila]

Interesting. Another thing I do is I curl my toes up like this in a ball.

[Mecca]

What does that have to do with anything? What does that help with?

[Jamila]

I don't know. I've just been doing it since I was a little kid. And when I stand up straight, my. My. My. My feet being a fist, I stand at a fist. It just brings me comfort. I don't know what it is. Like, you don't realize the things that you do, but it's like I have so many pictures of my feet just curled up like that. I don't know. I'm doing it right now.

[Mecca]

It feels so good.

[Jamila]

It's just, I. I am a monkey. I can pick up damn near anything with these toes.

[Mecca]

Yo. Okay, so I don't know why my mom did this. My mom is big on picking things up with her feet. I can pick things up with my feet. Like, I can pick relatively.

[Jamila]

I can damn near right with my feet. I'm so talented. I'm a monkey.

[Mecca]

I literally.

[Jamila]

I'm just your average monkey.

[Mecca]

Oh, it's getting real.

[Jamila]

It got racialized.

[Mecca]

Racialized. I don't know what to say to that. I don't know. I think that being able to write with your feet is a level of ambidextroism.

[Jamila]

Interesting. I can't do it with my left, though.

[Mecca]

I get somewhat right with my left. It looks like a baby, though.

[Jamila]

I feel like I get stupid with my left. I just be.

[Mecca]

Yeah, you can't hold.

[Jamila]

I don't even know how to Think.

[Mecca]

Yeah, like that side of your brain is not strong.

[Jamila]

Yeah, well, don't be talking about my side of brain.

[Mecca]

I mean, if you can't do it, you can't do it.

[Jamila]

That don't mean that you just made that up.

[Mecca]

I know. Your right side is controlled by the left side of your brain, and your left side is controlled.

[Jamila]

Well, that don't mean my other side of brain ain't strong.

[Mecca]

That is what it is.

[Jamila]

All sides of my brain is strong. Right, with your left hand right now, bitch. Now I learned. Now I got to learn, because you ain't finna just be talking about my right side of brain.

[Mecca]

It's not strong.

[Jamila]

It's strong. I could do so many things.

[Mecca]

Ooh, push up.

[Jamila]

Bitches be. Bitches can write with their left all of a sudden. Yeah, I ain't got no strong brain. My brain is so strong, I can imagine anything I want.

[Mecca]

Same.

[Jamila]

Bitches want to be me. So big.

[Mecca]

Same. I was literally doing it. We were in the car yesterday. What was you imagining when the. Jesse with the song. Oh, now I'm talking.

[Jamila]

What?

[Mecca]

Jesse Powell. When the song.

[Jamila]

You.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

Well, what the hell was you just about to sing? You find the words, baby. There's some words in there somewhere.

[Mecca]

I can't find the tune.

[Jamila]

You can't find a tune?

[Mecca]

The words, the melody.

[Jamila]

You just got thoughts.

[Mecca]

But I just have thoughts.

[Jamila]

So what would you imagine yourself getting.

[Mecca]

Married with a man dancing to that song? And that's why I was like, well.

[Jamila]

What man was you imagining at the altar?

[Mecca]

I don't know if I want to talk about the man. I don't want to, really.

[Jamila]

It was a real man or was not a fictitious man.

[Mecca]

You know, when you were doing. I had to stare out the window for a second and daydream and imagine me in my dress and what I possibly wearing.

[Jamila]

Interesting.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

That's why he was quiet.

[Mecca]

I got. When we was talking, I got real quiet.

[Jamila]

I had.

[Mecca]

I had to. I had to. I had to. What you say, watch a movie. I had to watch a movie, Right? Yes. I like this.

[Jamila]

I like this.

[Mecca]

And then tap back into the conversation.

[Jamila]

I often imagine myself with men, but sometimes I create the man in my head.

[Mecca]

I do that, too.

[Jamila]

Fun, like. And I just make them.

[Mecca]

No, I do make a man.

[Jamila]

I wish I could. I could. I wish I could do that in real life.

[Mecca]

Put him in the machine. Put. What?

[Jamila]

You think I would make the most perfect man ever? Everybody would be so jealous of my man if I could make him in a machine.

[Mecca]

I don't want y'all to be jealous of my man. Cause then y'all will want my man. And I don't really.

[Jamila]

They'd be jealous of me. But my. But he'll be the perfect man. So it'd be nothing that they could do about it.

[Mecca]

Yeah, you right. Yeah, that's okay. If my man not gonna go, you can definitely want.

[Jamila]

You know what I mean? You just gonna have to want him. He's so sexy and funny and amazing.

[Mecca]

And he loves me down and only me. He's only attracted to me both physically.

[Jamila]

Exactly.

[Mecca]

He wouldn't even see it spiritually and emotionally.

[Jamila]

What a dream. And he would let me do whatever I wanted to do.

[Mecca]

And he would let me do whatever.

[Jamila]

That's my dream. A man who would just let me be me. Oh, please. Don't ever pretend like I'm annoying you.

[Mecca]

I'll be honest. People don't act like I'm annoying them. But I can't. I can't figure out if they act like I don't or if I'm just so aloof in that way that I don't notice because I'm deaf. But no, because I'm definitely big on. I can tell when people don't want me in the room. And I don't like feeling like that.

[Jamila]

What does that feel like? Let's get into the social awareness. Because a lot of people like it.

[Mecca]

Social what?

[Jamila]

Awareness.

[Mecca]

Awareness.

[Jamila]

A lot of people just sit there, act a fool. Like you don't feel the feeling that's in the air. Ruminating.

[Mecca]

They're going to get mad at me. But old parents, that was kind of a thing I was taught. Social awareness, seriously, you know, we don't teach the kids that anymore. We don't teach them manners.

[Jamila]

Hello.

[Mecca]

Goodbye. Excuse me. Hold the door open if you're a man. Darington holds the door open to this day. You know what I'm saying? Like certain cues, but then also to just kind of be. Also. Since my parents are old that. That and we live in California, a lot of white people. That level of social awareness, which. Let's get pause. I know that black people, especially those raised in black spaces. Call back to last week. Have a certain level of social. Racial awareness immediately. Because my ex, obviously raised by like his white father predominantly did not have the same blinkers around white people that I did in terms of. They're staring at us weirdly. Let's get the fuck. Like it just didn't go on. And it's like that is also another layer of social awareness. So it's like, I just. And my parents are old, so it's so heightened.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Like the birth certificates say, Negro. Their social awareness around white people is different than even, I would say, ours.

[Jamila]

There was a time growing up, and I think we've gotten a little bit lost in this, where parents would look at you and say, you're getting on everybody's goddamn nerves. Go sit down somewhere. And even though it would be a.

[Mecca]

Little spicy, remember when the lady got on TikTok and she said, teach your kids not to be annoying. And everyone was trying to jump her?

[Jamila]

And I said, well, listen, some of your kids are fucking annoying. And I can say that why? Because I was probably an annoying kid.

[Mecca]

Well, I was gonna say, well. Cause you have a kid, you probably.

[Jamila]

As an annoying child. I was also entertaining. So sometimes I was able to overstay my welcome.

[Mecca]

Say, the thing is, my mom taught me that, like, as a. I was definitely the girl in church who. I would sit around and listen to the old ladies gossip. My mama told me, you want to stay seated, Be quiet. You better shut down quietest church.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

She said, you're not a grown people.

[Jamila]

Person if you were going to overstay your.

[Mecca]

And then there was another girl my.

[Jamila]

Age, talk too much.

[Mecca]

Talk too much. And they would always be like, get.

[Jamila]

Your ass out of here. All they grow folk business. And she.

[Mecca]

And they would. Well, I almost said her name. She would say, you see how she got. Sit down, and you see how you was in there acting busy. Oh, bitch, I'm good for acting like I'm occupied. Naive drawing bitch.

[Jamila]

Just listening to all that.

[Mecca]

Look, my Auntie Jenna shout out. Jenna used to be like, look at Mecca acting like she ain't listening and.

[Jamila]

Still got to pretend and would still.

[Mecca]

Let me sit there because I was. And look, I wouldn't break character. I wouldn't look mechanism. I ain't listening to you, Jenna. I'm trying to hear what the hell they talk about.

[Jamila]

Yeah, shut up.

[Mecca]

Get back to what the hell y'all were saying.

[Jamila]

Yes, it's. It. There's an art. And one thing that I have gotten really, really good at, and I don't know what to blame for this, but I think I'm gonna have to use my adhd.

[Mecca]

Okay.

[Jamila]

I think my ADHD has given me a superpower because I am. I have this thing where I need to be stimulated. Like, some people get over stimulated, and I get. I feel that, too, but I get under stimulated a lot. So I think it's allowed me to adapt. And so My superpower is I could be talking to you, listening to a conversation here and listening to music over there.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

I have a couple of different ears and brains. My ADHD has given me so such great powers. I would be like, keep talking. But I want you to know I'm tapping into this conversation right here because I need to gather some points and then I'll know when to check back into this conversation to answer your question. So that I'm locked in. I've gotten so good at where I don't even break. I just be. But those who really know me well, really only my siblings can really clock when I've started to tune out and when I'm. Because it'll just start to get a little. I just start looking a little stupid in the face. It just starts to get a little muted. All of a sudden, my face looks flat. Flat. I don't know how to explain it.

[Mecca]

You probably just.

[Jamila]

I starts to kind of just. Just fall to the side. Sometimes I have to knock myself in the head to get that eye back in. In. In the right place. Sometimes that I just start to want. It just. It gets a little lazy and it just. It just start to roll. Roll to a certain place. And then. Yeah.

[Mecca]

Interesting.

[Jamila]

Yes.

[Mecca]

I just was. I'll just do that. We're gonna take a break.

[Jamila]

And we're back.

[Mecca]

But back to children being annoying. Yes, I think we should.

[Jamila]

Who's the most annoying kids? I'll tell you that.

[Mecca]

I know. Or like ever in general.

[Jamila]

Let's get racial.

[Mecca]

Oh, I was. I would so get out my brain. I was gonna get racialized. I was gonna give an intro to giving Rachel getting racialized, but I was.

[Jamila]

Going to let me just. Well, let's disclaimer it. So we can not be in trouble too much. So what I'm about to get into is racism. I'm going to be a little racist. So that is your fair warning, however my people be racist.

[Mecca]

Or are you going to be prejudiced?

[Jamila]

Clock that. Clock that. Every section of kid as far as racial groups are bad in their own different way. So I'm going to break down how different races and groups of kids are bad.

[Mecca]

Can I just instantly say something that made me think, since we're bringing up race growing up in California the way that little Mexican kids would be in bras, tearing them toy sections up the way my mama used to be.

[Jamila]

Get your ass. I have so much experience. Specifically, what has given me such insight is actually when I used to work at Avis Rental Car because I dealt with so many people and so many different children. And I am an observant person and I'm always trying to like people.

[Mecca]

Watch. It trickles down from like your overall cultural practices, how you guys have see familial units and then who is rendering the children within those familial units?

[Jamila]

Exactly. It's all. Also there's an element of the badness. Cuz I. I truly believe all children are bad and they should be. That's my hot take. That is my hot take. I hate a well behaved kid sometimes.

[Mecca]

Well, I was.

[Jamila]

Well, get up.

[Mecca]

No, I was well behaved.

[Jamila]

Oh, boring.

[Mecca]

Darrington wasn't. He was bad enough for the both of us.

[Jamila]

I guess it. I guess it evens out, but I just can't stand. It's not that I can't stand, it's just like, I be like, that baby want to get up and wreak havoc so bad. Let that baby go. That baby is in restraint.

[Mecca]

You like. I remember running into adults like you when I was a kid because again, I was like really well behaved. And they'd be like, don't you want to just like, are you all right? And I'd be like, no, I'm good.

[Jamila]

When you see kids like that, I just be wanting to give them some sugar. It was a lollipop.

[Mecca]

You want to hear something?

[Jamila]

Get up.

[Mecca]

I was at my Aunt Lola's house one time and I wasn't allowed to watch movies that were PG13. And I was like 6 and they turned on the Nutty professor and I was like, I'm not allowed to watch this.

[Jamila]

Oh, hell no. And you a snitching ass kid.

[Mecca]

They were so blown. They was like, bitch. Well, why would you tell us now? We have to change it. We can't watch it now. They were so mad at me.

[Jamila]

You were one of those.

[Mecca]

I was like, excuse me. Literally. Excuse me.

[Jamila]

With your fucking glasses.

[Mecca]

Excuse me.

[Jamila]

My mama said we can watch this.

[Mecca]

It's bad. Whenever I would go to my daddy's side of the family house, we got.

[Jamila]

Me in the gas. Anytime they was doing something we weren't supposed to do, turn it up.

[Mecca]

Literally. Oh, girl, if you can't watch it, don't watch it, then turn your back.

[Jamila]

Listen. Yeah, okay, so now let's get into badass kids. And they're racist. So black kids, the type of bad that black kids are, is always so incredibly funny to me because they are literally just old black people. They act like old black people. And it's always so funny watching them get in trouble. In trouble. Because it's like, that ain't nothing but your baby right over there cussing. Where you think they learned all that cussing from?

[Mecca]

Because. Because the sentences.

[Jamila]

Because they. They said it right.

[Mecca]

They use the content.

[Jamila]

They used it so perfectly, right? And to be like, yeah, that's just you. So black kids be acting bad, but it's because we do be acting grown, because we be surrounded by grown folks all the time. So that's the type of badness that black kids have. And it's always something so damn funny to me. And I'll be like, oh, that baby just grown. You know, white kids. Oh, now, white kids, there's a couple of different types, okay? Now, white children, they have a. They have the. I'm about to scream until you get me what I want. That's the first type.

[Mecca]

Okay?

[Jamila]

Yeah, them screamers, I mean. I mean, they scream, baby. Yeah, they scream and cuts up. And I'm talking about flailing, falling at.

[Mecca]

And that's scary to me.

[Jamila]

And I'd be like.

[Mecca]

Because I also, like, I don't want you to hurt yourself.

[Jamila]

Get up.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

And the. And the parents will just sit there like this.

[Mecca]

Hey, guys.

[Jamila]

And I'll be looking at them like, you don't see that goddamn baby crying and screaming and flailing. Oh, he cuts up at home because we're in public.

[Mecca]

Gets down. He don't play.

[Jamila]

And then there's the other little white kids that disappear. They just be wandering. They said, baby, that'd be bad.

[Mecca]

And to my point about the Mexican kids, in their way, they just want to have fun. And they don't care at what expense because they're going to go on Ross and open the toys. Who gives a fuck? I'm just here to have fun.

[Jamila]

This is mine.

[Mecca]

This is mine. I'm not trying to take it with me. I know I can't steal. I'm not a thief.

[Jamila]

Yes.

[Mecca]

I just want to have some fun for a second.

[Jamila]

Indian kids, bad as shit. And let me tell you, they'll start messing with your shit, girl. I don't even know. They'll come over here and look at you dead in your face.

[Mecca]

Why did you take it?

[Jamila]

And I look at that parent, that parent be like. Like, I don't know. I don't know what to do either. And I'll be like, God damn it, get the. Get the Bible. When I was working at abs, there was this one customer I had. They was Indian. They came every week. I was very familiar with them. And I would just be praying that they didn't bring their badass child with them him every time. And he came every time. He had to be about 8. Real prime time bad.

[Mecca]

Yes.

[Jamila]

Do you know that this little boy opened our office door like there was, you know, separated like the front and then like the side where we're behind the counter. He opened that door. Next thing I know he's sitting next to me and start typing on my goddamn computer. I said, I looked at, I looked at his daddy. Daddy looked at me like I said get your ass from around here. And guess what? He did got his ass from around him.

[Mecca]

That's sometimes need a bark sometimes, you.

[Jamila]

Know, and it's just, it's okay. And, and we've gotten away from correcting children now hold on cuz.

[Mecca]

Don't nobody want their kids to be correct. Don't nobody want to correct.

[Jamila]

And I'm a gentle parent, but gentle.

[Mecca]

Parent is not passive parent.

[Jamila]

And that's what they don't understand because.

[Mecca]

Let me tell you, there were several times with little moms especially like you have the baby. But I was into the teenage angst we I got her when she was 12, 14. And I watched the, I watched the angst setting. I watched the attitude marinate.

[Jamila]

I love that.

[Mecca]

For her though, it was so funny.

[Jamila]

Because it was like my karma, I can't. It's like, it's weird because like I said, I believe that children should be bad appropriately. There's an appropriate amount of badness. Right. I can't wait for the moment Noah gives me his first teen attitude. I might smile because I'll be like, yes, my son just like me attitude for no reason at all. Rolling the eyes, sucking the teeth. Ah, talking back. Bye Shayla.

[Mecca]

Lil mom talked back a few times and I was like, I'm not happy that I, I The spirit, the 65 year old within me really came out and I who the hell is you talking to? Shut the up. Stop talking to me like, like. No, I really, I was like, because we not about to do this. And so then it got to the point where the under the breath and now you. What was that? And then now you in your room and y'all can hear say whatever the hell you want in your room.

[Jamila]

Was you. Were you a attitude filled Te somewhat.

[Mecca]

So that's why it was more so fun. Like it was, it would be like she would do it and then I'd go in my room and laugh like. But I would be irritated obviously when she was doing it.

[Jamila]

But it would just be like, who your mom?

[Mecca]

No, me. I would I would, like, especially right before she moved, everything was just so extra because, you know, now we're coming into boys. And the hair and the. It's like, everything is so. And I remember being there when, like, everything is on 10. Like, your hair not being correct is, like, the end of the world.

[Jamila]

It is to this day.

[Mecca]

I mean, she's stressing and like, well, baby, we got to leave in five minutes, and I don't care if your hair is done or not. So now you're bringing the whole fucking bathroom in the car with you because you're trying to figure it out why I'm driving. Now you. It would just be like, oh, my God, please.

[Jamila]

I love teenagers. I think they're the funniest.

[Mecca]

I think it's so funny. But then it's like, you do have to correct them.

[Jamila]

Yeah, it's funny watching teens just interact with each other because it's like, I remember also being there and thinking to myself, bitch, I'm so fucking grown. And I love when kids think they're grown because it's like, you should, like, I. Oh, it's just so funny. Like, you ever listen to kids conversations?

[Mecca]

So that's my thing. I have no problem with children acting a certain way amongst children. I absolutely do think we are losing the recipes in terms of how children need to act in front of adults. There's no way your child should feel comfortable cussing and speaking.

[Jamila]

Yeah, that's crazy.

[Mecca]

Around the adults.

[Jamila]

It'd be like, oh, wait, hold on.

[Mecca]

Adults in the room. And so that's why I'm saying when I would walk past her room and I would be in my room where she was on the game, and I would hear her curse. I act like I did it because I'm not in your presence, and you're doing your thing in your space right now.

[Jamila]

Right.

[Mecca]

But when she would hear me walk, that language change real quick, I feel like that's the. That's the dynamic we need to have, because we're not. We're not. I know there's this whole thing of, like, kids are. Are humans, too, and I respect you as a person, but we. I am the authoritarian here. And that is in that at all that conversation that was happening. Remember last time we were traveling where the grandfather was taking the child to church, and the church baby didn't want to go, and the mom was starting to tell the granddaddy, don't take her to church. It's like, well, you sent her for the inch. The granddaddy said, we'll come get her. And the mom was acting mad about that. When I say that was my people down. But I had a mom who was also respected, respectful of other people. Like that was the one rule. We had the house that everyone to come to because mama had the snacks.

[Jamila]

I was gonna say we had that house.

[Mecca]

She had the house.

[Jamila]

But we also had all the games.

[Mecca]

Exactly. All the things. And then we had the dedicated space. Like you had the basement. We had a big spacious living room in our own rooms. But the rule was if you was gonna spend a night Saturday, you have to go. You had to go to church on Sunday. So I will say a lot of my friends opted not to spend the night on Saturdays. I ain't trying to go to your church. I'm trying to go to church. Which my mom respected. But she also would stay on 10 toes. If you're going to sleep here on Saturdays, we're going to church on Sundays. So it's like you can't tell people what they're gonna do in their house. Especially if they kids, which like you can't dictate what people gonna do in their house. I really believe that. So like just to that situation, it's like, if you're gonna drop your child off with a grandparent and leave it for the summer, you can't tell that grandparent.

[Jamila]

Yeah. Cause we sure was over at Mount Olive.

[Mecca]

I was gonna say. And the thing is, no kid wants to go to church like that. That's the thing. It's like, oh, she said she didn't want to go to church. Well, duh. I didn't want to go to church either. And I was a well behaved child. I would rather have not been in church, but. And I was experiencing that same thing with little moms.

[Jamila]

I don't feel like it.

[Mecca]

I don't want. I don't give a fuck. That's. And because that's what I'm doing on Sunday and I'm not leaving you here alone. So what are we supposed to do? Who finna watch you? You know what I'm saying? I'm not gonna go drop you off with another adult right now. That don't make no sense.

[Jamila]

There is an element of blackness and black culture that I think we have to maintain, which is the relationship of parents to parents. And I see it kind of being lost because we've lost the elements of community. Something that my parents were very, very, very strict on was, you're not going to anybody's house that I don't know, number one. And I have not spoken to their parents. We were. There was a lot of. There was a whole sleepover thing that we couldn't really do. But once we got to an age where they're kind of like, okay, I think you're able to kind of handle yourself, essentially, it was still very much like, I need to know them parents. And. Yeah, it got to a point where I was. It was only about two, three houses I could really go to.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

And their parents were so similar to my parents, especially Autumn. Like, her parents are, like, so very similar to my parents that, like, I was getting in trouble by her parents.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

I had made a video about that. Like, have you ever gotten yelled at by your friends parents? It hits differently. Like, oh, my God. Or like, vice versa. Your mom has yelled at your friends, and it's like, I don't know yet. You really in the family if you can start getting yelled at.

[Mecca]

I mean, obviously, they're roommates now. Yeah, they go everywhere now. But they've been like that since they were kids. And, like, child, we all used to get in trouble.

[Jamila]

You should. You should never be scared as a. And this is what. This is why I say it's a black thing. Because you should be scared about correcting certain white kids because that might end up in a whole different. Yeah, but in black culture, you. We can correct other people's kids now. There's a level now. You can't just go around popping kids now. That's correct. Now we is not in 1960 no more.

[Mecca]

I was gonna say that because they.

[Jamila]

Sure used to do that.

[Mecca]

That's a different time.

[Jamila]

Yeah. If. If When Noah get up age and all them kids running around my house. Because I always wanted to be the house where the kids congregate. Because I just love watching kids just do. They're just so funny.

[Mecca]

Well, I was gonna say, be that mom. Given that that was my house. I liked. I love that we loved being. Because we weren't in the streets. We was at the crib. My mom like. And it's just like, when you provide a safe space for your child and their friends to congregate, you can really. Well, my mama. Keep a handle on what's on what your kid doing. What your kid is doing.

[Jamila]

Hello.

[Mecca]

And the levels at which they get in trouble. Because I'm not gonna say in California, the whole weed, weeds comes around eventually around high school and then. Yes, my mom wasn't oblivious to us by that pool and what we was doing. But what was. She was saying? Y'all are trying to hide it you aren't outside, you can't get in trouble. You're in the backyard like all this.

[Jamila]

Stuff and you know, that reminds me. And I have to get on my bald headed daddy's ass one more time cuz that's my life's goal, you know, My parents are weed smokers. You know, that's what they do. They love that ganja down when I was in high school. Now this is not going to make a lick of sense, but it just is what it is. Why did I put a wad of grass in my pocket? I don't know, I did weird things. I was kind of a little cuckoo. I grabbed a big wad of grass and I put it in my pocket. Later on those jeans got washed. You see where I'm going? It turned into a. A nug of some sort. My dad washed those jeans and brought it to me. He was like, what is this? And I said, crazy? You asked. So one day I was outside and I grabbed a wad of grass and I put it she like.

[Mecca]

He was like, you a lie.

[Jamila]

And I was like. And obviously as a weed smoker, he's looking at it like this looks like a nug. He keeps sniffing it, trying to smell the weed. And he was just like, it's because I wash it. He did not believe me. He did not. Like he wanted it to be weed so bad. So I just told him it was weed. Because I'm like, is that what you want to hear? And I got in trouble and I was just like, I don't even smoke weed. I didn't smoke weed until college daddy. Just saying, I'm like. And then off, mind you, in my head I was thinking and I wanted to say this so goddamn bad to him. So now I'm gonna say it. Nigga, you smoke weed. Why the hell would you be mad if I'm smoking weed? You start smoking at 11 at least. I'm 15. Well, because he didn't want you, my humbug.

[Mecca]

I will say if a water grass is like, it doesn't make brother, it's a water grass.

[Jamila]

It does not make sense. But like it's one of those times. I wasn't lying. I was so truthful that time.

[Mecca]

Well, let's spin it. This is our segment called Spin It Now. Here's a disclaimer. Jamila and I are not PR professionals, but we did study communications in undergrad and we love the hustle. We love the bustle of spinning your nasty, messy, salacious stories. So don't forget to email [e-mail] if you have any situations that you want us to put a PR spin on. Now remember, this advice may be unhinged anymore, but it will get you out of your pickle. So what do we have?

[Jamila]

Hi Megan. Jameela. My story isn't really messy and there may or may or may not be a few grammatical errors because I dropped out of college like five years ago. Lmao. So I've been dating this guy on and off since about August of last year. He's a 27 year old white male and I'm a 24 year old female. When we first started dating, everything seemed fine until he got a new job and had to relocate. He only moved two hours away from me, so I didn't mind making the drive all the time. By the way, I always make the drive to him because I live with my dad. After a month of us trying to long distance, he started acting strange and broke up with me. He told me he felt like he wasn't treating me right emotionally and it wasn't fair to me, which I understand, but I was truly hurt. A few weeks after we started trying to talk again, I hung out around his family for Christmas and we were back together like nothing happened. A week later, his ass broke with me again and I was just over it and stopped talking to him after that. A few weeks later, later I was going out, got drunk and sent him a text. We've been seeing each other again, but I just feel like our good time will end soon again. I guess I just want to know, should I continue talking to him or just end things? You know the answer to that, baby. But we could, we could get into it if you want.

[Mecca]

Well, it seems like this, this person is just familiar. This white man is just familiar. And if you want to with him and let him be familiar from time to time, I don't see a problem with him. That. Like, who doesn't dibble and dabble and go back and forth with their ex for a couple years?

[Jamila]

Oh, I don't. Oh, I'm not a dibbler. Dabbler. I'm not.

[Mecca]

Well, okay, let me, let me rephrase this. Well, this was her boyfriend.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Okay. I don't go back and forth with boyfriends, but let me say I will go back and forth for years with a. You feel me? With a little. Ooh. I've been known to keep around for like decade at this point.

[Jamila]

So that don't feel crazy to you?

[Mecca]

No. Because if we never had Anything if we never like in an actual relationship. It's just like the same reason she keeps going back to him is familiar.

[Jamila]

You don't get like over it, like bored.

[Mecca]

I mean, when I'm over it, I'll go get an actual boyfriend and that's what happens. But then you go back when my. When me and my actual boyfriend break up. Like me and the very first green and white boy went back and forth from four years. He even came to homecoming one year. It was very good. That after tailgate dick was really good.

[Jamila]

There's.

[Mecca]

But I'm not talking to him right now.

[Jamila]

Well, that would indicate the honor tried.

[Mecca]

To DM me and I was just like, I don't feel like doing this right now. But it's no beef. It's just like, you know, when you go back and forth with someone so much, it's like, are you available to go back and forth right now? It was like, no, I'm not.

[Jamila]

Okay, well, then we have. We're probably going to have different.

[Mecca]

No, I think she should leave this man alone.

[Jamila]

Okay, but you just said it was cool for her to dibble and dabble.

[Mecca]

If she wants to, but he's two hours away. There's not even like.

[Jamila]

I feel like you're too emotionally attached. Yeah, I feel like she's too emotional emotionally attached because she's getting upset and hurt and she's also getting her hopes up that this is going to be a thing. And it's very clear that he doesn't want to be with you in a long. In a long term way. That's why he keeps dropping you off. And I hate to break the news to you. I don't know if this is news breaking, but like, it's because of other women. He's just trying to not hurt your feelings. What do you mean? He. He told you that it was because he wasn't going to be there emotionally for you. That is lying. A is a. I don't care if he's white.

[Mecca]

Oh, I was gonna say. Well, he's not a.

[Jamila]

You know, A as in boy. Well, yes, you know what I'm saying that that ain't nothing but an old white. Well, no, you know what I'm saying because you know, in colloquially speaking can be a black. It could be a man. So I was speaking in the colloquial to that cracker that. But you know, as some. So for me, Tameka gave you her on and off.

[Mecca]

Well, no, I think you should leave him alone. I think he's yo. Yoing Your feelings. And it's not even convenient because he's two hours away now. What I was giving this her knowing that should I leave him alone or. I feel like it's going to end soon. If you're aware of that, you might be emotionally aware enough to be like, maybe I want to with him until it ends. I don't know. I mean, because I've done that.

[Jamila]

Once you start asking the question.

[Mecca]

Yeah, you've answered it, which is fair.

[Jamila]

It's like once you start having any sort of doubt of. Of that sort, where you're having concerns, doubts, just go ahead and understand that there's. That's your intuition speaking. And you've experienced it before. It's like. And I guess for me, the reason that I don't really double back and I don't really entertain people that I've once talked to before is because it didn't serve me the first time. So why is it gonna serve me now? Like, there are, you know, like, my little Hampton Boo. Like, for. For that situation.

[Mecca]

I was gonna say you definitely be liking to go dip. Dip.

[Jamila]

But he's like, the only person. Because we didn't really have an ending. We kind of just separated because of.

[Mecca]

Well, that. That's literally what I'm talking about.

[Jamila]

No, it's not.

[Mecca]

Yes, it is.

[Jamila]

You be talking to people on and off. It is if any goddamn reason. Please, Please.

[Mecca]

We never.

[Jamila]

That's.

[Mecca]

No.

[Jamila]

That is not.

[Mecca]

No.

[Jamila]

Now, don't make me all of them.

[Mecca]

Who is all of them?

[Jamila]

Whichever ones you dibble and dabble with.

[Mecca]

What I'm saying is we talking about the same thing. No, we ain't actually have an ending. I just went off and started doing something else.

[Jamila]

But we don't just dibble and dabble. I. We don't even. I don't. I don't talk on a regular basis. No.

[Mecca]

Oh, well, I'm sorry.

[Jamila]

I would be open to doubling back with him at some point because I know there was. There was never any bad blood, number one specifically. But also, I literally just stopped talking to him because I moved away versus we interacted with each other and it just didn't work out. I'm not going. I'm not doing that with anybody's. Like, it didn't serve me the first time. And I also want to experience new people. And like I said, I get bored.

[Mecca]

Sometimes a man knows how to fuck and you just gotta, you know, I don't care.

[Jamila]

There's always gonna be a new man.

[Mecca]

There can always be a new man. But sometimes you won't be feeling like finding a new man sometimes you right there in that moment. I can't go meet someone new right now. I need somebody in the call log.

[Jamila]

There are toys that can do that.

[Mecca]

I got that too. Sometimes. Sometimes you need something with a pulse.

[Jamila]

It is different. Okay, but I.

[Mecca]

About that. Rose gonna do what she needs. Rosa gonna do what she need to do. Every time you feel me, they was like, you gonna lose a sensation. I'm here for a good time, not a long time. I don't give a. Okay. But sometimes you need something that you can feel the warmth, the blood pumping, girl.

[Jamila]

And so you'll just hit up.

[Mecca]

If I need to hit someone, maybe.

[Jamila]

It'S my pride also, I think. But I don't care.

[Mecca]

I don't. I'm not hitting up people who I have. Who in. Like, I have bad blood with. I don't keep men around who I feel like. Demi. What. We're talking about similar situations in terms of I backed up. And also, it's a lot of me. So I would say I went and got a man. So I backed up off of you.

[Jamila]

So you'll be the problem is what you're saying. Well, yes.

[Mecca]

If I need to back up, I don't mind backing up. And don't be going nowhere. No way.

[Jamila]

So you're the problem. Now we've gotten to. Now we've gotten to the meat and the root of this. It's you. You be doing these boys dirty makeup. What.

[Mecca]

What is dirty?

[Jamila]

Now, if you have to ask, what did I say?

[Mecca]

What is dirty? You'd be like, what this boy. What this boy did to her? That's some. That's some mega shit.

[Jamila]

I just can't be there.

[Mecca]

But I wouldn't have. I don't think I would have. I wouldn't have lied. I would have said, we live two hours away.

[Jamila]

You wouldn't have said, I just can't fight.

[Mecca]

Now I'm telling you what I would have said.

[Jamila]

So if you was.

[Mecca]

What if I was. If I was in a situation.

[Jamila]

If you was in that situation. Right. Yeah. Say the two hours was a thing, but it was really because you was dating some other boy who had your attention. Would you tell him another boy has my attention?

[Mecca]

Well, I don't gotta tell my left hand with my right hand.

[Jamila]

And that's what I said.

[Mecca]

I'm even dating. That's what he did. I'm even dating the other person. Because you're two hours away.

[Jamila]

Right.

[Mecca]

Like, that is. Like that is genuinely a reason we're not in each other's face no more. So I met someone two hours away. Where I'm at.

[Jamila]

I'm just not going to tell you the second part of the sin.

[Mecca]

I'm not. Why would I tell you that, though? Like, why would that. I feel like. And this is what we be telling the girls. That's implied. That part is implied. I don't have to tell you, especially considering now that he's single, you're single, y'all are not in a relationship. So he does not have to tell you what he's doing. You don't have to tell these niggas what you're doing. I'm serious about this. I'm being dead the fuck right now.

[Jamila]

Yeah, no, and if this was. I agree. I don't really tell.

[Mecca]

You know, like, we're not exclusive unless you have a conversation about exclusivity. You don't owe anyone a ass thing. I stand on that. I believe that. I live by that.

[Jamila]

Okay, now an exclusive exclusivity clause is important. It's important that verbal agreement has to be stated. I am not going to assume that.

[Mecca]

And I'm not going to assume. Assume.

[Jamila]

I will not ever assume that. Unless I don't assume.

[Mecca]

If I haven't had the conversation with you, I don't assume you're not talking to the. So that could never.

[Jamila]

Yeah, actually I. I assume you do other. Yeah.

[Mecca]

So that's why I'm like, okay, if this was me, it's clear he's talking to other here. Would I have done the whole emotional thing? No, Because I do feel like that piece. That's where you get into the toxicity, the manipulation all the time. Because then she's got to start to.

[Jamila]

Think, what can I do?

[Mecca]

What did I do? No, let's be serious. I moved away. This is now a longdistance relationship.

[Jamila]

I feel like doing two hours.

[Mecca]

I'm not interested.

[Jamila]

And also, I ain't going to lie to you, you crazy for always driving two hours. I know it's cuz you live with your daddy, but he could have drove out there to take you on a date or something.

[Mecca]

A hotel, hotel, something.

[Jamila]

You driving two hours every goddamn time. Mind you, I'm not opposed to traveling for a man.

[Mecca]

No, I'm not either.

[Jamila]

But like every single time.

[Mecca]

No, girl, he don't fuck with you like that. Yeah, and you should have known that when he was driving. And I know you live with your dad. I know that's why you said that. But he didn't offer to like hotels.

[Jamila]

Airbnb are under like something even a midpoint. Y'all.

[Mecca]

Y'all could have done a trip. Y'all could have. No, he don't fuck with you like that. But like I said, I just would have been like. I'm not saying I'm not interested in a certain aspect of a relationship is enough. It's enough. Not interested in long distance relationship. I don't feel like you got to pry that I don't have to tell.

[Jamila]

You and I don't know now is the time for you to be the one to. Why do you keep letting him drop you, girl? Drop you?

[Mecca]

I was going to say you at the perfect time. Where you talking? I would ghost him.

[Jamila]

Yeah, see, that's the talk.

[Mecca]

That's what they talking about. I'm the problem. I would ghost. But given y'all history, I think it's for you to ghost him. I feel like cold turkey.

[Jamila]

I feel like ghosting is only. Is not problematic when you don't have rapport. Like, if y'all just met or like whatever, you've only been talking for so long. Who cares about ghosting? But like, since they have so much rapport, I don't think ghosting is going to be as successful. I feel it's going to create a thing versus you. Just saying I'm not interested at this time. Like, he keeps doing your ass. Stop letting him get that one up on you. That white man, I would block his number.

[Mecca]

Okay, I will say I'm gonna tell my tea. I am very big on what you're talking about. So ghosting, not just the ghosting, but the one up. Like, in that way I am prideful. Like, you got one time to tell me that we not gonna do this. So like with the green and white boy, he got a girlfriend. He texted me and told me about it. I did not respond to the text message. There's nothing to respond to. You know, even though you did like you, you clearly were expecting a response. The part I have a girlfriend now is all I need to see. I have nothing else to say. So I just. I deleted the thread. So when he DMed me, I just kept the conversation super short. I said something he said letting me back. I didn't respond. Like, I'm just really big on. Like, you got one time to do that.

[Jamila]

You got one time because he got a girlfriend.

[Mecca]

You got one time.

[Jamila]

You got one time to get a on me. You got.

[Mecca]

No, I think no, but this is. And I learned that lesson in college because I do think.

[Jamila]

But yeah, because I don't want to be your double back.

[Mecca]

I don't want to be the. You're in between girlfriends.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Do you get what I'm saying?

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Like, and I had that. I had a situation like that where it was. It was like, oh, I'm the bitch you go to.

[Jamila]

Yeah. Like every time I'm single. Like, yeah.

[Mecca]

But I'm never the one that you're thinking to make your girlfriend.

[Jamila]

Yeah. I don't like that.

[Mecca]

Fuck that. I'm not that.

[Jamila]

Because that means you don't respect me. I'm just a hole. And I don't want to be just a hole.

[Mecca]

I'm not just a hole.

[Jamila]

I am a woman.

[Mecca]

Well, sometimes I'm just a hole because sometimes I be treating the men like that too. Sometime you just a piece of meat, you know, but we need to be. That needs to be assignment. That needs to be a. And I feel like that's never gonna work if one of y'all feels like I like. Like if one of y'all likes the other one more. And in that particular situation I'm talking about, I liked him more. So they. I said, oh, I like to step the fuck back.

[Jamila]

Yeah. That's always the dynamic. That's weird. It's like when you realize I like him more than he likes me.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

I get that.

[Mecca]

And I'm super big. Especially relating back to this situation. Baby, rip the band aid off. Don't try and do a slow burn. That's only going to elongate the situation and hurt your feelings more in the long run. People are so afraid of a band aid rip. And I will say, with my very first boyfriend, when we broke up, Band Aid rip. My second boyfriend, obviously I had moved to Baltimore. It was. That was like a fucking eight month breakup. It was like a slow motion car wreck. When y'all are done, be done, Go through those emotions, get you your little three months of sadness and get the on. Because if you do the eight months slow, slow motion breakup that's now, you done turned it into a year of wasting time. Wasting time?

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Seriously, get over it. Block his number today.

[Jamila]

I wouldn't even.

[Mecca]

And I know Jamila, tell me we have rapport. You need to tell him. I would say block his number. This man, you. You gave us two different examples of him telling you he don't want you.

[Jamila]

It just doesn't seem like you. Are you, like, are you happy? This exact like you are.

[Mecca]

And I just feel like a man should only have to tell you he don't want you. One time.

[Jamila]

Yeah. Don't keep.

[Mecca]

Don't make. Don't.

[Jamila]

At this point, it's a humiliation.

[Mecca]

I was going to say. Cuz you about to be. If you let him tell you you about to be on your third time.

[Jamila]

I would never let. Like that is. Oh my gosh. Because I. Like I said I have pride, but also like embarrassment is my biggest right. That's why I'm saying you have to.

[Mecca]

Block him because he already don't want you.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Yeah, girl. Well, Jam gonna tell you to put a bow on it and tell him why. I'm gonna tell you block.

[Jamila]

Well, I didn't say all that.

[Mecca]

I think she should just block.

[Jamila]

I just said that's just how I maneuver with people. Just because I wouldn't. Because I really don't block people like that. Only because I. This is just my mindset. It don't. It may not make sense. Everybody else. I don't give a damn for me. I feel like block blocking is for people who harass you or like, you know, you literally need to allow them to not reach out to you anymore if it's like something like that. But I'm not like a. I don't block people just because we didn't get along or whatever. Because it's like. You never know. I don't know. It's just a weird thing with me. I really only block people who. I feel like you. You are harassive and I need to kind of get you out of this. But.

[Mecca]

Interesting.

[Jamila]

Yeah. If I'm. If I'm dealing with a guy that is just kind of like we. There's no longer. What.

[Mecca]

Whatever.

[Jamila]

Whatever. I'm gonna let you know how you had me up. If you had me up. I'm. I'm gonna. I maybe have a kink with getting wild with my feelings out. You're gonna hear what the. I have to say. I felt some type of way and you're gonna hear me. And that's.

[Mecca]

I'm okay with. I'm. I'm one of. I do that too. I definitely. I love to tell people where they had me up at.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

But I'm also big on telling them right then and there. I don't like to sit on it.

[Jamila]

Yeah. No. Not just like you. Hey. So didn't like this or I peep this. I don't like this. I'm kind of good. And just let it be that typ. For the most part. It doesn't. I don't have to block you because it's like that was in the Conversation now there, there have been moments where like I've interacted with guys where I'm like, oh you're weird. I'm gonna have to block you. Or just like they keep reaching out but honestly like a guy can keep reaching out and like I just won't respond and I, I just never feel the need to block. I don't know because I also don't want them to find those other means. You know how people say like, oh, I know he likes me because he found me on Cash app. That scares me.

[Mecca]

No, I, well I think I also have to have last word. I like to cut someone out, then block them. I, I don't want to hear a thing you have to say. That's a thing. And then like also just I don't. You usually like if you have me super duper. It just depends on the situation. But I'm not bit like I don't like explaining myself. And I also believe people know exactly where they had you up.

[Jamila]

They do.

[Mecca]

I don't think the closure it's closed because I said it is.

[Jamila]

Right.

[Mecca]

So I especially with men and being our age and just I don't have time for that. You see how, you see how we move around? I don't have time for that. I'd be trying. I'm trying to call, you know who I'm trying to call right now and try and it's communication when we're traveling do be lacking even there because it's like, shit, I can't. I really can't. Like, I can't. So it's like I'm not gonna go back and forth. I don't have time like this. I'm just not gonna talk to you no more. It's really easy when you actually have real business. Keep yourself busy, girl. I, I the one thing I will say, my mama told me this after my first breakup. Sulking in the house is only going like, it sounds crazy. Crazy. It was very cliche. But you need to date again and you need to go get some business and get busy. Do some hobbies, be outside, do something. That's what's going to distract you and really make you get over what the hell you got going on.

[Jamila]

We're going to take a break. Did you know that parents rank financial literacy as the number one most difficult life skill to teach? Meet Greenlight, the debit card and money app for families. With Greenlight, you can send money to kids quickly, send set up chores automate allowance and keep an eye on your kids spending with real time Notifications. Kids learn to earn, save, and spend wisely. And parents can rest easy knowing their kids are learning about money with guardrails in place. Try Greenlight Risk free [e-mail] Spotify and we're back. Alrighty, y'all. So we're about to read some of yalls amazing reviews and comments that y'all leave us on various platforms. We really do like reading these because I like to get feedback. I'm obsessed with feedback. I really do like to know what y'all are thinking, how you're enjoying the episode. If you feel like we can do something better. I want to hear all of those things. So let's get into it. These first ones are from apple, from Royal Wiz 1920. Hey, y'all. I'm about an hour from Mobile, so hearing Jamila talk about that area is so nostalgic. I love the podcast and I listen to y'all at work. I just subscribed to the Patreon too. Yay. Make sure y'all subscribe to the Patreon links in our bio. This is from. Hold on. I got to zoom. Y'all know my eyes is bad kid. Whoa. Why is that?

[Mecca]

What?

[Jamila]

That's a crazy username. That's a little racist, but whatever. I actually stand 10 toes down about this pod. Y'all do such a great job at luring people in. Come through with the unison Madea goes to jail song. Lol. Definitely nostalgic. How Jamila was devastated by Michael is how I was devastated when Whitney passed. When I was in college, in my door morning missing class just to tune into her funeral. Beyonce's rendition of Ivan Marie at the beginning, the BET Awards in all white as a tribute to Michael Jackson was just captivating all of those things.

[Mecca]

Remember when Sissy Houston walked in? It was so black, but I said, that's what I need at my funeral. They were like, she was in a gold suit and they like, carried her in. Me and my mama watched this drama.

[Jamila]

Yeah, that was a good drama. It was a good. You know, Whitney was a church lady, so I knew the funeral was going to be good.

[Mecca]

Four hours. Her and Aretha was never ending. Oh, it's me and Spotify.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Okay. I'm about to read the Spotify. Simone Taylor said, not the Philly mention. Go Birds. Francis with the star where the A supposed to be? Said I was playing in a Little League, a Little League softball game the day Michael Jackson died, and I heard a lady in the bleacher screaming, nah, Michael Jackson can't Be dead. Mind you, it's the day before my birthday. I got home and seen the news and I was sick. Sick. Not Michael ruined your birthday. I too, would feel away because it was like, well, now no one's going to pay attention to me.

[Jamila]

Sorry.

[Mecca]

Deja o. Williams said, I was crying in the car with my parents, listening to the radio. The music stopped and they announced it. I started bawling. Oh, no. I was in the car with my parents, listening to the radio. The music stopped and they announced it. I started bawling, crying. Carly said, omg. I can still remember when Michael Jackson died. MTV and VH1 were playing his videos all day long, and I was obsessed. I immediately downloaded all of his songs on lime wire. Whoa.

[Jamila]

Oh, yes, ma'am.

[Mecca]

Yes, ma'am. I gave Mama so many viruses with lime wire and listened to them over and over. Our family went on a vacation to Myrtle Beach a few weeks later. Parentheses, which was a big deal at the time because we were poor as well. Yes. And me and my sister, siblings were allowed to each pick one souvenir. I got a memorial. I got a memorial shirt of him at a T shirt shop and wore it until. Well, it cut off. But I'm gonna say you probably wore it.

[Jamila]

Wore it to the guy. I already know exactly what you said because I. One of my shirts did the same thing.

[Mecca]

Several Michael Jackson rest in peace shirts. And I wore them till they began to peel. Yeah. J x z i6h said, Ah, not too much. Too much on Philly.

[Jamila]

That was.

[Mecca]

What do we say about it?

[Jamila]

You said Philly smelled like crack.

[Mecca]

Well, that's what Sierra said they had smelled like crack.

[Jamila]

And she's from Philly. Just telling you what. What?

[Mecca]

You said that Sierra loves eggs. She said they'd be blowing crack smoke.

[Jamila]

Just tell you what, people.

[Mecca]

She said it's happened several times in her lifetime in Philly, and she loves Philly. Don't get mad at me because they be blowing crack smoke on the train. Tanisha said, I remember when Michael Jackson passed and my parents blasted his music for two weeks straight. Didn't they all? Didn't all of our parents?

[Jamila]

All righty. We're on YouTube at name 138. I fell out when Jam said, my son is a cartwright. Ms. Savani said, Whoever the voice with the audio disclaimer. Your voice is so nice. Thank you. And here go. Here go Melissa, commenting she fine, too. Hey, Melissa, I'm Kari. I think that's Melissa, their producer. Yes, ma'am. Shout out to Melissa, our producer.

[Mecca]

She's got that announcer voice.

[Jamila]

At Niara Zaka7956. My son is a cartright has me on the floor.

[Mecca]

Yo, that was the. That was so. My son is a car. It was so funny.

[Jamila]

At Ruham. Ruhama, honey. I'm K at Jamila, getting calls about Michael Jackson's death as a teen. I love the podcast, baby. I was down bad. Y'all don't understand. At the Robertson 1113 T and Tamara, perfect example of both. Tia is in community with us. Meanwhile, they are calling Tamara Tamaga. Love the pod. Bring the visuals back to Spotify, too. They will be at some point, y'all. We had some technical things on the back end. Spotify has to work out, but, you know, until then, you can watch all the visuals on YouTube. Thank you.

[Mecca]

I'm sure Spotify will eventually figure it out. Yeah, I'm sure it ain't gonna be a family thing. We just trying to figure this thing.

[Jamila]

Yeah. You know, we do.

[Mecca]

Well. Church announcement. Someone said this in the comments. I love the church announcements at the end.

[Jamila]

Yeah.

[Mecca]

Keep a eye out on both me and Jimmy, Liz, you know, whether you follow us on Tick Tock, Instagram, this camera.

[Jamila]

No, you wasn't.

[Mecca]

I was.

[Jamila]

Oh, I thought.

[Mecca]

I can't look at them. That's me. I'm looking at this.

[Jamila]

I just seen your eyes do, like, three different points. I'm like, well, because. What the hell is she looking at?

[Mecca]

So you see how this is on my left?

[Jamila]

So that's moving.

[Mecca]

So look. No, but look, look. So I was, like, trying to look here, but I saw it. I was like, what's happening? Keep an eye out. This is going to drop on Thursday, but we are making an announcement Friday of what we're doing next week. So I'm just saying keep an eye out.

[Jamila]

Keep an eye out.

[Mecca]

Keep an eye out on our pages.

[Jamila]

Yes.

[Mecca]

For what we'll be doing next.

[Jamila]

What we have coming, we have coming.

[Mecca]

We'll be in Dallas at a couple events.

[Jamila]

I think we can announce Dallas possibly because today's Tuesday. By Thursday, we'll be there. Yeah. So we can announce it. So Dallas will be in Dallas for fashion show. The Desiree Fashion Show.

[Mecca]

Be in Dallas for the Desiree Fashion Show.

[Jamila]

So that's going to be exciting. Exciting.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

If you're gonna. If you're gonna be out and about, catch us. We. I'm sure we'll be out in the streets at some.

[Mecca]

Well, I mean, the day this drops will actually be in Dallas because I'm driving down on Wednesday. You're flying in on Wednesday?

[Jamila]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Mecca]

We leave on Friday. Yeah, we're going to be in Dallas basically Wednesday, Thursday, a little bit of Friday. I got it. I can't hit that traffic back to Houston.

[Jamila]

Yeah, I got to drive.

[Mecca]

So we're gonna try and head out of Dallas in the morning in there and then the next week we'll.

[Jamila]

We'll be somewhere.

[Mecca]

You guys will find that out on Friday.

[Jamila]

Yes, you guys will find it. But you have to make sure you guys are following us. Make sure you guys are following the, the official unhinged and immoral pages. We are on Tik Tok and on Instagram.

[Mecca]

We're on Twitter too.

[Jamila]

Yeah. So unhinged, immoral pod on Instagram and on Tick Tock and on Twitter is Mech and Mila because too many words taken.

[Mecca]

It was taken.

[Jamila]

Too many letters. So yeah, make sure you guys are following us everywhere.

[Mecca]

Yeah.

[Jamila]

Every Thursday. Don't forget Clockwork.

[Mecca]

Don't forget to subscribe to the Patreon.

[Jamila]

Yes, Patreon is very important. That's how we keep the lights on.

[Mecca]

That's how we pay everybody.

[Jamila]

That's how we pay everybody so that we can do this and make sure this show is continuously being produced and such great quality. See, we got new mics.

[Mecca]

We did get new mics. $100 each job.

[Jamila]

Yeah, these are good. There's good mics. Cuz they're heavy. They got a little weight to them.

[Mecca]

Weight. Yeah, I got a. I got a good mic Stamulus that told me to get with a weight on it.

[Jamila]

You look like you were jacking off just now. Just by the way.

[Mecca]

So can they see that?

[Jamila]

I don't know. I saw it. Anyways, this has been another amazing episode of Unhinged and World. We love you guys so much. Make sure you guys are following along. We'll see you next week.

[Mecca]

Bye.

[Jamila]

Unhinged and Immoral is hosted by Jamila Bell and Mecca.

[Mecca]

Produced by Melissa D. Mont and Diamond.

[Jamila]

Imprint Productions, post production by Coco Lawrence.

[Mecca]

Production assistant by Melanie D. Watson, music.

[Jamila]

By Adi and Brooklyn Billionaires and graphics by Claudia choi. Hey, Jamie McDonald here. This is my brand new song. Oh God I'm desperate down on my my knees Send help from heaven Cuz.

[Mecca]

That'S what I need I need heaven.

[Jamila]

And I desperate desperate oh I need heave. Be sure to check out my breakout single Desperate on all streaming platforms.