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Cody
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Eli Double Tap
E4Mafia's back.
Donut Operator
Undefeated and the last thing that goes through your head before you die. I was just really disappointed. I was like, I'm dead.
Fat Electrician
They're twist off.
Cody
This is gonna be like a biblical tale. We cut Mark half.
Brandon Herrera
We share him.
Fat Electrician
I call his a dick.
Donut Operator
No, don't cut him that way.
Fat Electrician
Eli.
Brandon Herrera
Say hi to Eli. He's racially ambiguous. Brandon. His hair is fabulous. Donut a dog joke disposition. And there's a fat electrician. Welcome to Unsubscribe. What's up, everyone? We have the new desert night camos.
Fat Electrician
Pans and the groin screens so you can decide which you like the most.
Brandon Herrera
Chubby electron guy did want this design.
Fat Electrician
So we got it knocked out and they turned out amazing. And again, a giant thank you for all you amazing people supporting the brand and making stuff like this possible. And oh my God, do we have such dope stuff in the works coming up? There's a remake of a video game coming up that has different camo patterns, which we will be rolling into shoe designs. And remember, hey, you're pretty good.
Brandon Herrera
Love y'all.
Fat Electrician
We got it. Oh, my God. We don't have white claws or booze to crack right now. Yeah, we all have coffee.
Brandon Herrera
That's what it was.
Eli Double Tap
No one knows.
Brandon Herrera
I was definitely drinking coffee. We're just at the White House earlier.
Cody
Cody. We're on the podcast.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, shit. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the unsubscribed podcast at cpac. I'm joined today by Eli Double Tap, fat electrician, Brandon Herrera, myself, donut operator. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for having us. Cpac.
Fat Electrician
We're gonna see how this plays out. Yo, Sarah. A big shout out to Sarah, like the viraldo group for putting all this we didn't know anything we were getting into. No, we had, like, the Pentagon slated, and then everything else just unfolded.
Cody
I wish we could just tell you guys that, like, directly in front of us is the stage that Elon Musk is speaking on, and about three booths down is Newsmax. And we are treated like legitimate media here, which is wild. A mistake.
Brandon Herrera
I have a. I have a badge that says media. It's kind of funny.
Eli Double Tap
Should I go on this, too?
Fat Electrician
We've had a wild. This is the first gang episode since we've done this entire thing, which we didn't know, again, what we were doing. So we got to go to the Pentagon. That's dope.
Cody
Oh, yeah, that happened.
Fat Electrician
And we got to go to the White House.
Brandon Herrera
I wore this tank top to the Pentagon.
Cody
And the White House.
Brandon Herrera
And the White House.
Eli Double Tap
Dude, all the dirty looks they were giving you at the Pentagon wearing your.
Brandon Herrera
Tank top, I don't give a. I've come to one conclusion during this experiment. Everybody that actually matters thinks it's hilarious and asks for a picture and all the minions that are charged with walking around behind them getting their coffee orders and sucking their. Is disgusted that I'm here in a tank top and I'm more important than them. I don't care.
Cody
You're in the.
Donut Operator
If you.
Cody
You're worried about getting in trouble in the Pentagon for wearing a fucking tank top, all you need to do is keep a pocket copy of your DD214.
Brandon Herrera
I don't. I loved it. It was great the entire time. Also, I have. I have the official memorandum stating that unsubscribe podcast is authorized to drink redacted amount of redacted cans of alcohol in redacted areas of the Pentagon.
Cody
It's pretty great. Do we. Do you actually have a copy of that yet?
Brandon Herrera
We have it on the way, yeah. Fuck yes.
Cody
I was really hoping we could get a copy of.
Brandon Herrera
I'm framing it 100%.
Cody
Let's print out a couple.
Brandon Herrera
This is. This is peak E4 mafia. Because, like, Cody E4 me, E4 Eli E4. And we just got authorization to drink at the Pentagon.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, not only that, Peaky for a Mafia. Where were we? Whose desk were we at before Mafia was there?
Brandon Herrera
We walked in to the Sergeant Major of the Army's office and took a picture with me sitting in his chair and Eli sitting in my lap and took a family picture in the Sergeant Major of the Army's office after each drinking three white claws in the Pentagon. Which I can't stress to you enough, the amount of people that were like, how do. How the fuck do you guys have alcohol here? This is like, really, really big. No, no. To have alcohol in the Pentagon, Major.
Fat Electrician
Every commands are major. I was gonna come chew you guys out, and then you guys had a.
Brandon Herrera
Memo that was signed off by the secretary of.
Eli Double Tap
Is that not the best E4 mafia story ever, though? It's like, yeah, maybe. Maybe we didn't do it back then. But look, E4 Mafia is back.
Brandon Herrera
Undefeated.
Eli Double Tap
Undefeated.
Cody
My favorite part was like, all of the people that were. Were like, oh, my God. Like, they. They had three white claws apiece in the Pentagon. It was so cute. Wow, you guys are drunk in the Pentagon. Like, these guys are all tipsy.
Brandon Herrera
We're all walking around stone ass sober after three white claws. Like, sure, I guess.
Cody
Cool. It's like getting hit with a nerf dart. It's like. Oh, do you need a tourniquet?
Fat Electrician
No. Okay, buddy, you're bleeding out.
Cody
I think I'll be all right.
Brandon Herrera
I'm fine, dude.
Fat Electrician
And they had to, like, even disposing the White Claw was a process. They had to go through, like, the level of steps. Finn. Finn dressed up yesterday, not today. For the White House. We'll get into that.
Brandon Herrera
You mean Finn showing up in an M81 Vietnam Era field jacket wearing the whitest white slip on vans I've ever seen in my entire life. Like, I. Honestly, I was thinking, I'm in the tank top, usually people are glaring at me. People are glaring at him like, he was a homeless Vietnam veteran that wandered.
Cody
Into a house in the van was the funniest.
Eli Double Tap
What did Finn say? He said, oh, I couldn't find dress shoes at Walmart.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, like, stop.
Eli Double Tap
Like, brother, we're heading to the Pentagon.
Cody
I stopped by Walmart. I couldn't find dress shoes.
Fat Electrician
Like, why did you think, huh? Boy says I need to get the.
Cody
Well, my favorite part was you. You said, because he's got, like, just the pure white shoes. They were brand new M81 woodland jacket. You're like, you look like Lieutenant Dan in heaven.
Brandon Herrera
You look like Lieutenant Dan got to walk again.
Eli Double Tap
Jesus, Finn, we're bad people. No, he did have a dope jacket, but he did also look like the homeless guy that we picked up off the side of the road.
Fat Electrician
Oh, dude. Homeless. Homeless and living his best life. Everyone was jealous. Pentagon still just.
Eli Double Tap
If you guys don't know, Finn is our videographer. We walked in the Pentagon with him wearing a giant M81 coat and Walmart slippers.
Brandon Herrera
Honestly, it's truly a testament to M81 being the Lord's flannel because like, straight up, I'm wearing a tuxedo tank top. And everybody's like, wow, you went to the White House and you wore a tank top? And then they would immediately turn to Finn and be like, I love your jacket, bro. Like, that's how awesome M81 Woodland Camo is.
Eli Double Tap
It was so funny walking behind you wearing your tank top, bro.
Fat Electrician
You want to see some evil eyes? Like, yeah.
Eli Double Tap
Cuz you had. You had colonels, generals, majors. You had the top tier walking like by us. And they were eyeing you like they wanted to knife and you so hard.
Fat Electrician
Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
This is being. Guess what?
Eli Double Tap
They can't.
Cody
Yeah.
Eli Double Tap
You're being escorted by fucking colonel in a major.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah. Like he's under control somehow. I don't know what's going on.
Fat Electrician
And this is the top.
Cody
Like here your tank top is glowing like a. Like an orange legendary item. And nobody can figure out why.
Fat Electrician
Like to like stressing what you're saying, Cody, is this is the top brass of the army. Like, General George, chief of staff of the army, was down there to meet us before we film. Like, hey, wanted to give Nick and I haircuts and.
Cody
Yeah, oh, yeah.
Fat Electrician
Everything else. But that is just like, hey, what's up? Great to see you guys are like, oh, man. Hey, what's up, man? Everyone, everyone.
Brandon Herrera
I. I don't. I don't know what's going on. The joint chief just hugged the guy in the tank top.
Cody
Yeah. I feel like I think I'm having a stroke.
Brandon Herrera
I have achieved ultimate shitbag status. It's the peak of my entire life, to be honest with you guys.
Eli Double Tap
Dude, E4 mafia for life.
Fat Electrician
Even the sergeant major that was next to Sergeant Major Weimers, he was like, so confused what was going on. I was like, Hey, 2 ID. When he. And I was like, oh, I was from this year to this year. He was like, good. The you were at. He was like, I was there in 07. We deployed together. That. Yeah, instantly, me and that dude, besties. I was like, can we get a photo? Like, that's why I was like, what would make Wymir the most annoying?
Cody
Imagine you see him in the field, though, one day back in, you know, 2007 or whatever. And you think like in the back of your mind, you just get this thought, next time I see him is going to be in 15 years in the Pentagon.
Brandon Herrera
At the Pentagon.
Fat Electrician
Bruh.
Cody
Life's fucking weird, man.
Brandon Herrera
We both ended up the same place. We took different paths, very different paths.
Cody
We took The. The road less traveled. I'll give it that.
Fat Electrician
Path of least resistance. Slowest smooth. Smoothest fast.
Brandon Herrera
The path of least resistance where I drive my McLaren here.
Cody
Oh, God damn.
Brandon Herrera
I'm a professional. I. We are professional.
Eli Double Tap
I had a weird moment here today.
Fat Electrician
Which one?
Eli Double Tap
I've never ran into a Navy buddy and I ran into someone that I was in the Navy with in 07, like 08.09.
Fat Electrician
How'd he run into you? What were we doing?
Eli Double Tap
We were doing. What were we doing? A little stand a little.
Fat Electrician
What were we doing alive, Per. I don't even know what that's called.
Cody
Yeah, we were just doing like a little like side panel here at cp.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, just a little panel.
Cody
Talking about social media and stuff like that.
Eli Double Tap
I didn't want to say sideshow.
Cody
Not as well. We are kind of a sideshow.
Eli Double Tap
We are a sideshow.
Cody
If anybody fits the description, it's us.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, we're doing a little panel. And like before.
Fat Electrician
May I just compliment. We said we weren't gonna say that many bad things. And the guys did pretty.
Cody
You can. You can swear here.
Brandon Herrera
We did all. We did. 30 minutes on CPAC. We only dropped the F bomb three times. Okay. I was proud of us.
Fat Electrician
And Cody only made one come joke, which the audience did.
Brandon Herrera
Catch on that.
Cody
That was so funny because you're just like. Well, because they're full of. They're full of poo. The poo. Because I can't say immediately catch yourself on by saying.
Fat Electrician
Cody's that accidental comedian. I said poo because I couldn't say word because I'm behaving. So the poo.
Cody
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Everyone pauses.
Cody
He's like. Poo bags were like.
Brandon Herrera
I keep trying to look at you guys, cuz every time I look forward, I realize that we're in a giant hallway at a major convention and four nuns just walked by, middle of an unsubscribe episode.
Cody
It's.
Eli Double Tap
You know what's so hard about this? Our voices carry. Or like when we're in our studio or an enclosed place, we can hear each other. But here, like, it's really hard to hear each other. So we could just. People watch and I do this whole thing.
Cody
Not only is it hard to to hear each other though, but everyone else can hear us. So when we're talking about and cum jokes live at cpac.
Eli Double Tap
Do you guys want to that cop short?
Fat Electrician
I don't know if this says one for each of us. And Nick gets three bud lights. Oh, okay. We got options. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Okay, we can crack it. Finally.
Cody
All right.
Fat Electrician
Okay, ready? Three, three, two, one.
Eli Double Tap
Welcome to unscribed podcast. We're in a people watch and make fun of everyone.
Brandon Herrera
We don't have a camera facing the other way, but gonna have to take our word for it.
Cody
It was pretty funny. Like, literally, like, walking here to our booth. We walked by Javier, Malay, Argentinian president.
Brandon Herrera
That just rug pulled his entire country.
Cody
Which I had not heard about. I have no knowledge of this.
Brandon Herrera
Allegedly.
Cody
Allegedly.
Brandon Herrera
Allegedly. He tweeted out a meme coin, and, like, hundred million dollars worth of investment flooded in. He deleted the tweet, and then it was a huge rug pull. I don't know what degree he was involved with it. I don't even know if it's true. But that was the word on the street as of right now, honestly.
Cody
W.
Fat Electrician
Jesus.
Cody
I'm kidding. That's one thing that we've always, like.
Fat Electrician
We'Ve had an offer. We've had an offer for. They were like, would unsub do a meme?
Brandon Herrera
Do you guys want to have cum coin? No.
Cody
I mean, I've been offered, like, $1 million up front to do basically an obvious crypto rug pull. And I'm like, dude, go fuck yourself.
Fat Electrician
No. Like, there's no content creator worth a damn. It's like, yeah, this is gonna pay out. This. This time's gonna be different, and we're gonna convince our audience, well, look, it's basically free.
Cody
What's the cost? Your entire reputation.
Brandon Herrera
So speaking of that, I don't even know if it's technically a meme coin, but we were hanging out with Gordon Ryan last night. Oh, yeah. Best jujitsu guy on the planet. And he is, like, the shining example of a way that you can actually. I don't know if it was technically a crypto coin, but I believe it was. But he did a crypto launch. But the benefit of buying it was if you buy this coin, you get all of his jiu Jitsu instructionals for free for the rest of forever whenever he makes an instructional. And it was, like, actually, like, one of the few times where it was like, oh, that worked out and wasn't a rug pull and he didn't fuck everybody over.
Cody
So it's like you're turning. Basically, it's like crypto pepper box for Jesus.
Brandon Herrera
It would be like if we gave you a lifetime subscription to Pepperbox if you bought into, like, cum coin or whatever. But I don't think we're gonna go that direction, Is it really?
Cody
Oh, no, that's a. That's been a thing. Yeah. Coins have been.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, that's coins valued at $3,000.
Cody
Hey, dude, I'm still holding on to my Hawk Tua coin, man. That's one of these days. She'll come back.
Fat Electrician
She's the only.
Brandon Herrera
Believe me, she's had enough. Come on her back.
Fat Electrician
That.
Cody
Hey, all right. Andy from Parks and Rec, that outtake.
Brandon Herrera
If you put the ball on the tee, I'm gonna hit it. Okay.
Fat Electrician
That girl went through.
Brandon Herrera
The funny part is with that whole thing is I went on Zach's after action podcast like two months before her crypto coin. What happened? And Zach released the episode like a day before she had her rug pull. And in the podcast, I was like, I feel like she had her 15 minutes of fame and she's getting taken advantage of and somebody's gonna her over. And all the comments on Zach's podcast, like, wow, his comments aged really, really well. Like he saw this coming a mile away.
Cody
Still, one of my favorite unsub moments is when we're talking about how much administrative fees Wendigoon's Appalachian rebuild project took. I'm like, oh, how much this is going to. Who has the tokens? Haley, Wendigoon is rug pulling his entire audience. He should pull out of that immediately.
Fat Electrician
Your son. It's a fake charity.
Brandon Herrera
The religious rug pole.
Cody
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Let me poop in peace. Connor.
Brandon Herrera
I'm not playing a game.
Cody
Hi, Eli. You won't be needing this with today's sponsor, Tushy.
Donut Operator
Then how will I clean my butt?
Eli Double Tap
No.
Cody
So do yourself a favor and get a bidet by Eli.
Donut Operator
Pay attention.
Fat Electrician
What's wrong with you?
Cody
Come on, we've all been to the void Bidet by Tushy.
Fat Electrician
What'd you say about the toilet paper?
Cody
Washing with a precise stream of clean water helps to remove 99% of bacteria as opposed to wiping with regular toilet paper. Here, let me show you.
Fat Electrician
Please don't show me anything. You don't know what you want.
Eli Double Tap
Soothing, isn't it?
Cody
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Fat Electrician
I am squeaky clean instantly improve your.
Cody
Health from the bottom up. For a limited time. Our listeners get 10% off their first order by using code unsubscribe at checkout.
Fat Electrician
That's 10% off your first first bidet order at hello tushy.com with promo code unsubscribe.
Eli Double Tap
Guys, this is the weirdest studio I've ever been in my life.
Brandon Herrera
I know random people in Make America great again. Hats are just.
Cody
Before we move on, I feel the need to clarify. This is a joke. Wendigoon's a very good friend, and you should absolutely donate to his charity's.
Brandon Herrera
The nicest person on the planet.
Eli Double Tap
You can't see behind us. There's. I would about 400 people just walk in the hallway. Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Just show the other angle just with that.
Eli Double Tap
And so the other.
Fat Electrician
The other media just capture what we're talking.
Brandon Herrera
Are just walking up with full on, like $12,000 camera.
Eli Double Tap
And I don't know who they are filming us.
Fat Electrician
We did have people stop during.
Cody
Genuinely very funny. Because there's people walking around with $20,000 cameras, and I'm just like sitting here. I'm like, we're fours on a bench and we're going to get like 10 times your views.
Brandon Herrera
I know. My favorite part is you guys wore the same shirt today.
Donut Operator
I did not.
Brandon Herrera
He's wearing his jacket.
Cody
That's actually. That jacket's from. What was it? The. The last of us?
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, the last of us, dude.
Cody
Yeah.
Eli Double Tap
Trust me.
Cody
It.
Fat Electrician
They're slightly different.
Eli Double Tap
They're like.
Fat Electrician
They got defensive, like, no, we're not.
Brandon Herrera
Wearing the same jacket.
Fat Electrician
His has buttons and mine has pearls.
Eli Double Tap
Yours is gay. Mine's not. Listen here.
Cody
You're gay.
Eli Double Tap
You're gay. Not me. You're gay.
Brandon Herrera
Oh, my God.
Cody
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Brandon Herrera
I think my favorite part of this whole podcast so far is watching Cody's old buddy from the Navy desperately trying to figure out what the fuck is going on and why his friend is a famous retard.
Eli Double Tap
He doesn't follow any of us. That's a funny part of my podcast.
Brandon Herrera
He literally just, like, ran into an old friend and got blindsided by the fact that you're what, your top 1,000 YouTubers on the planet right now, aren't you?
Eli Double Tap
871?
Brandon Herrera
You're the 871 most followed YouTuber on Earth.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
Which is like. Doesn't sound impressive, but it's actually a.
Cody
Lot of really impressive. A lot of people who don't know YouTube will probably think like, oh, wow, that's like, way lower than I thought. All the people who do YouTube are like, holy, you crested top thousand.
Brandon Herrera
Holy. I mean, how many gold play buttons are out now? It's like over a hundred thousand, right?
Cody
Oh, it can't be that much.
Brandon Herrera
Over a hundred thousand gold play buttons. Yeah.
Cody
No.
Brandon Herrera
Over a hundred thousand channels with a million subs I've got.
Fat Electrician
Wait, for real?
Brandon Herrera
Oh, for sure.
Eli Double Tap
No, maybe a thousand.
Fat Electrician
No, maybe 10,000.
Brandon Herrera
Definitely not.
Cody
59,000.
Brandon Herrera
59.
Cody
That's way more than I would have thought, man. I don't feel special at all.
Brandon Herrera
59,000 people have achieved the same thing as you, Brandon. Go yourself.
Cody
No, no, no, no, no, no. They achieved a million. I'm like four times that now.
Brandon Herrera
You don't get another play button till 10, dude.
Cody
Yeah, I will never get that.
Eli Double Tap
The sweetest thing that I've heard this week is my dad said, you should start it. You should. You should do a game show as a YouTuber. And I said, dad, Mr. Beast has that. He said, who's Mr. Beast? I said, he's the biggest YouTuber of all time. My dad says, I thought you were the biggest YouTuber of all time.
Cody
In Papa Donuts heart.
Eli Double Tap
That's so sweet, dad.
Cody
But no, I just, you know, he's.
Fat Electrician
Been telling all his friends his son is the biggest YouTuber ever.
Cody
Oh, absolutely.
Brandon Herrera
I don't want to be gay about this. There's like, I don't know of another two people on the planet that I think I have a closer relationship with. Formed on a smaller amount of time than your parents. I've probably been around your parents, cumulatively, maybe seven to eight hours ever. And I legitimately think I could call your mother and she would fly to my house to babysit my kids if I want her to.
Cody
Oh, yeah.
Brandon Herrera
Like, she legitimately treats me like her son. You have the nicest parents on the planet.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, dude. They'll take care of you all day long.
Cody
I know I'll be having a bad day and your mom will just text me out of nowhere saying, like, I love you. If you need anything, let me know.
Brandon Herrera
And I'm just like, she can sense it.
Cody
Yeah, she's got the mom sense. Fuck.
Fat Electrician
Hey, Brandon, you're sad. Is Cody all right, though?
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, she all right.
Fat Electrician
Hey, that fat electrician, he's doing sad Things. I'm gonna go fly and see him. The sweetest mom of all time.
Cody
Brandon, you. You can't yourself yet. It'd be bad for Cody.
Brandon Herrera
I swear to God, Brandon, don't put.
Eli Double Tap
The shotgun in your mouth. That would be really bad.
Brandon Herrera
I'm going to hit your mom up. I'm not even going to tell you. I'm not even going to invite you. I'm just going to invite both your parents out to Iowa to stay with me, be on an episode of Fat Pews to shoot guns and hang out with my family. And not fudgeing invite you.
Cody
Our parents would do that.
Brandon Herrera
I know, love, 100%.
Cody
You should invite Eli's mom, too.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, she'll show up. She's dead.
Brandon Herrera
You might have to go remote Eli's Eli grave. I would bet money.
Cody
I'm sorry, that was just.
Brandon Herrera
Eli's dad would show up though. He would drive a Harley. He'd show up a couple of days late because he rode his bike there, but he would show up 100%.
Fat Electrician
My dad.
Brandon Herrera
I'm like mildly scared though, cuz like your dad's going to show up and start like judging my house and all the things that are wrong with it. Be like, what the. Here's living in pigsville. You got to fix all this.
Cody
You get woken up at 5 o'clock in the morning cuz Eli's dad's doing the tile.
Brandon Herrera
I know, just Mexican.
Fat Electrician
My brother had to yell at him because he tried to fix my brother's brand new lawnmower. He's like, the blades are dull. He's like, dad, they're brand new. Stop. Why'd you take them off? My dad had disassembled the lawnmower to sharpen them by hand.
Cody
Oh my God.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, just old school Mexican. They put it together wrong though, because it's new tech.
Brandon Herrera
Only time in unsub history I think I've almost cried is when Eli seeing your dad see you do unsub live in Dallas was like, I'm not going to cry. I'm not. I gotta go pee.
Fat Electrician
Dude, that was that easiest. I was like, oh, this is my first. My dad's never seen this. I was like, oh, oh. Jay caught that on camera. Well, I'm drunk too, so I'm gonna make a live video. Me crying and then I'm gonna pull all the guys together and cry in front of the meat can. You was so confused. Papa me was like, oh, yeah, yeah.
Brandon Herrera
Papa meat sat next to me at the Gundies this year in Las Vegas.
Fat Electrician
Oh, yep.
Cody
Like our live show.
Brandon Herrera
You wanted to. Oh, yeah. No, no, no, no. At the Gundy award show. Because he walked.
Cody
I forgot you guys were actually there around.
Brandon Herrera
It was me, Zach, and Hannah sitting there, and Papa Meat walked in, just kind of like blatantly not knowing what's going on. I was like, yo, hey. He sat next to me. You want to talk about trying to not appear like a papa Me leaning over, whispering in your ear with all his voice inter of like, he.
Eli Double Tap
I'm already seeing it, Eli.
Brandon Herrera
Everybody at the Gundies is, like, super deep into 2a and they understand everything that's going on, but, like, it's like a level 30 meme on the Internet. You know what I mean? So, like.
Cody
But also, everybody who's won a Gundy is basically a caricature of some variety, for sure.
Brandon Herrera
But, like, some. Like the. You know, the sponsor would come up and they'd be like, we're really. We're really pushing and spending a lot of our money and effort into having concealed carry reciprocity across all of the United States. And Papa Meat is like, I don't know what the concealed carry reciprocity, even me. And he's just doing his caricatures in my ear the whole time. I'm desperately trying not to laugh out loud while there's serious conversations going on. Yeah, it was awful.
Cody
Oh, do we have another mic?
Eli Double Tap
Do you want. Hey, Mark. To sell a story?
Fat Electrician
Yeah, we'll scoot over.
Eli Double Tap
You want to tell a story?
Fat Electrician
Focus on this side.
Brandon Herrera
Get over here.
Eli Double Tap
On that note, can I introduce our guest with us tonight? Can I. Can I say your full past?
Donut Operator
Sure, man.
Eli Double Tap
Okay.
Donut Operator
Whatever you know of it.
Eli Double Tap
25 years on the civil teams, 8 years with a gold team on team 6. A great person, wonderful human being. We would just love to hang out with you and hear some stories from you.
Donut Operator
All right, cool, man. What do you want to know? I mean, name. He was just saying introduce you. Oh, sorry.
Fat Electrician
Random seal man.
Donut Operator
Sorry. Yeah, Random seal just. Just showed up. No, I'm Mark.
Fat Electrician
Mark, Nice.
Donut Operator
He said not say my last name, but. But everybody's name is Mark, so my last name shorten is coach. So that's what people know me as. Coach.
Brandon Herrera
Do you know how hard it is to find a seal that doesn't have a book?
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, Mark. What are you writing your book, dude?
Cody
Yeah.
Donut Operator
That ain't ever gonna happen. Sorry.
Fat Electrician
Mark's new book.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Cody
Yeah, they heard that. They heard you were never writing a book, and they flipped your trident.
Donut Operator
Yeah, it's like, you know, you almost have to have creative writing get through buds these days, you know, it's an elective.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, that's Hell week. It's like, oh yeah, the tight. You're doing a haiku.
Brandon Herrera
The tide was.
Fat Electrician
No, that's too many syll.
Cody
Come on.
Fat Electrician
Knuckle dragon struggling with the haiku.
Donut Operator
Knuckle dragon frogman here.
Eli Double Tap
No, that ain't gonna happen.
Brandon Herrera
A lot of people that don't know what a haiku is.
Donut Operator
At least I knew what it was.
Cody
I also love. We're explaining the intricacies of Hell Week and haikus while Ted Cruz walks by.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, there goes Ted Cruz.
Cody
Literally Ted Cruz.
Eli Double Tap
Me?
Donut Operator
Why not?
Cody
Yeah, he looked at us appropriate, like appropriately. Like a bunch of retards.
Eli Double Tap
Dismissed us immediately.
Donut Operator
Retarded. We can say that now, right?
Fat Electrician
Yeah, he said it.
Donut Operator
Not like we ever stopped, but now it's.
Cody
I saw that on. I was on the. On X the other day. Elon was talking to. There was this one guy who's just talking about all the Social Security stuff. You know, they're talking about all the fraud that's happening with that right now. And somebody's like, oh my God, I can't believe Elon doesn't know how to use SQL. And Elon replies this. The government uses SQL, dude.
Fat Electrician
Seeing that I was like, from Elon.
Cody
Current Elon, it's like, oh, retard is so back.
Eli Double Tap
Is he on stage right now?
Cody
I think so.
Brandon Herrera
I tweeted about that because they were like, Elon doesn't realize that the reason that they're 150 year olds old collecting Social Security is because of the. The coding method used is C ball. And C ball is like literally one of the first coding types ever from like the 1940s. And I was like, wait, does Social Security still operate on sea. Like it was literally out of date by the 1970s.
Donut Operator
That's like using vacuum tubes.
Brandon Herrera
No, 100.
Cody
That's like opening up the nuclear football and it's. Do you want to play a game?
Donut Operator
That was the 80s, dude.
Brandon Herrera
Apparently it still runs on that dude Mark.
Fat Electrician
We had. I mean, you have. I mean, you're the only one that joined before I was born.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
When you told me when you joined, I was like, damn. So now I know what the guys.
Brandon Herrera
Sorry. Did you fight for the north or the South?
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
What year did you join?
Donut Operator
84.
Fat Electrician
Which you look fantastic. Like, brother, I never thought 84 is when you.
Brandon Herrera
That's why I told him. I was like. After I left dinner, I was like, wait a minute, how the old was that guy he didn't seem like he was that. How old are you?
Donut Operator
I'm 58.
Brandon Herrera
Jeez.
Donut Operator
I'm 59.
Cody
Misheard that from this side because like, like we said the, the acoustics in here, like dog. But I thought I overheard. You said you were 84. I'm like, he's with us. Like, there's absolutely. I'm like, I don't.
Fat Electrician
That's when Brandon has that. He looks in the mirrors like an aging.
Donut Operator
Terribly.
Cody
That dude. I was gonna go up to the hotel room and pull an Anthony.
Eli Double Tap
Let me help you.
Brandon Herrera
I, I, I'll, I'll have my moment of honesty here. Whenever I watch an old AK Guy video, I was like, that's not, that's not Brandon.
Cody
It's not the same person.
Brandon Herrera
How did you get at 30 darker for no reason. Texas, since I've known you.
Cody
Texas.
Fat Electrician
Mexican.
Cody
Trying to spend more time in the sun.
Brandon Herrera
Like, I went back and I was like, I'm gonna watch all the original AK vs AR guy videos. And I was like, that is.
Cody
Well, people don't realize when I first started doing that, I was like, 19.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Cody
Like, it's been 10 years, homie.
Brandon Herrera
Jesus.
Fat Electrician
Brandon was a baby. I remember watching AK guy versus AR guy and it's like a baby Brandon. I remember seeing that video, like, oh, holy.
Cody
I was like, that doesn't look like 10 years. I'm like, well, it matters which 10 years, because 19 to 29 is a.
Fat Electrician
Huge jump, especially depending on how much drinking you're doing.
Cody
Well, yeah, there's also that Papa Eli. All right, this is coffee.
Brandon Herrera
Some of us went to bed at 10 o'clock last night.
Fat Electrician
Hey, no, we didn't.
Cody
Nobody did that.
Brandon Herrera
I was talking about Eli. Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Hey, Brandon, you ever wake up in your bed feeling like you just fought in the war?
Cody
Yeah, why do you ask?
Fat Electrician
You ever wake up and feel like you slept in a sauna?
Cody
Yeah, I believe that's called night sweats.
Fat Electrician
Means you got a trash mattress, Brandon.
Cody
Why are we talking like Macho Man, Randy Savage?
Fat Electrician
Because today we're talking about her premiere sponsorship. Ghostbed.com. ghostbed mattresses are built with cooling technology.
Cody
So you're not sweating through your sheets like some street bum.
Fat Electrician
You stay cool, comfortable. Most importantly, you sleep through your night.
Cody
I got you for three minutes, but I got ghostbit all night.
Fat Electrician
You know what's longer than three minutes, Brandon?
Cody
Any sexual experience I've ever had.
Brandon Herrera
Ghost meds.
Fat Electrician
20 to 25 year warranty.
Cody
And you've got a 101 night free trial to test it out.
Fat Electrician
Oh, yeah.
Brandon Herrera
And you know what, brother?
Fat Electrician
They don't just sell mattresses.
Cody
They have bases, pillows, sheets, the whole empanada.
Fat Electrician
Just pick your mattress and grab a bundle, and right now, go.
Cody
Ghostbud's giving you 50% off everything. Just use unsubscribe at checkout and say 50%.
Fat Electrician
Head over to ghostbed.com unsubscribe.
Cody
That's ghostbed.com. unsubscribe.
Fat Electrician
Use code, unsubscribe, or I'll show up.
Cody
Under your bed and make ghost noises until you do.
Fat Electrician
Go. Now.
Cody
I just want to reiterate. None of this was in the script.
Fat Electrician
I don't know. We started talking, like, random. I get sleep. I took. I'm the only one that took a nap. I was like, where are you guys at?
Brandon Herrera
We were talking so much about you when you left.
Fat Electrician
Oh, Eli.
Brandon Herrera
We were at the. We were at the bar, and Eli's like, I'm gonna go take a nap real quick. And all three of us are like, I don't know how the. He goes and sleeps for an hour.
Eli Double Tap
And he does his siestas. You know, they do that.
Cody
Is it possible to learn this power?
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, please. I'm trying to get my girlfriend to teach me that.
Cody
Not from a gring Cuevas family.
Fat Electrician
Even Sav. She was thrown off at, like, Turkey Day, like, noon. We are all asleep, and she's like, you are not around. Like, your entire family passes out for an hour. And then I wake. Wake up and like, oh, my God, let's drink more. Let's party till the evening.
Brandon Herrera
I swear, one of my favorite parts of American history is there was an entire battalion during the Mexican American war that was 100% Irish, like, Irish Catholics that came over as immigrants and enlisted in the Irish army, and they fought in the Mexican American War. And they were like, wait, wait, these guys are. These guys are Catholic. Holy. You can put potatoes in a breakfast burrito. And then they're like, we're switching sides. They straight up switch sides during the Mexican American War.
Fat Electrician
No, there's a whole, like, community of, like, Irish.
Brandon Herrera
Irish Mexicans in Mexico to this day. Because this entire battalion of Irish immigrants switched teams during the middle of the Mexican American War.
Cody
It's really funny because when we were talking about getting show her citizenship at the Pentagon yesterday, just like, she's around joking around. You're like, listen, we. We need a favor. There's this person we know. She's a potato Mexican, but that's beside the point.
Fat Electrician
She's living her best life.
Brandon Herrera
So we went to the White House. And it was a big deal because the White House show is not an American citizen. And apparently it was a big deal for, like, a not American citizen to show up to the White House and get a tour or whatever. So show had to have, like, a different designation than the rest of us where she needed a guided escort the entire time. And so show shows up, knowing this already. She shows up wearing a black trench coat, a black shirt, and sunglasses. And I was like, well, good. I'm glad you dressed like a spy after you were already, like, on the radar.
Fat Electrician
She just needed, like, a big, wide brim.
Brandon Herrera
Black hat.
Donut Operator
Magazine.
Brandon Herrera
I should dress like Carmen Sandiego the entire time.
Cody
The driver went to go start the car.
Eli Double Tap
I went, you're not blending in, show man.
Cody
Do we.
Eli Double Tap
Mark. Hello, sir.
Donut Operator
What's up down there?
Eli Double Tap
Can I hear about your background a little bit?
Donut Operator
My background? Well, sure.
Fat Electrician
I love this. This is a reoccurring theme. You didn't know what Navy seals were.
Cody
Thanks, Mark.
Fat Electrician
When you joined.
Cody
I'm kidding.
Fat Electrician
I know Navy seals. This is one thing that's like. You didn't know what they were.
Donut Operator
Nobody knew what a seal was in 1984.
Cody
Yeah.
Donut Operator
I mean, it wasn't. It was not Internet.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah.
Donut Operator
Yeah. Nobody knew what the hell's going on.
Brandon Herrera
Can I. Can I tell the pretext to how I figured this out? So, like, total watch nerd. My favorite watch is a Tudor Pelagos. I was like, oh, the dude across the table from me has the same watch. And I, like, brought it up in conversation. He was like, yeah. I mean, yeah, Kind of sort of. Not really. And he shows me his. And on a Tudor Pelagos, it says Pelagos in red on every Pelagos period. And his is in gold. And he's like, yeah, there's not a whole lot of these. Go ahead.
Donut Operator
I don't know. It goes back the Tudor company and, you know, frogman go back.
Fat Electrician
Way back.
Donut Operator
Right. So one of our guys, we're looking for a squadron watch and had a connection through his father, who was a watch maker or whatever. I don't know the whole story on that, but. So they made a deal with Tudor and they made squadron watches for us. And mine says it's in gold because I was gold squadron.
Cody
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Donut Operator
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Cody
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Donut Operator
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Cody
Imagine you're in Red squadron and you just get a regular Tudor watch. Like, fuck.
Donut Operator
Yeah, it's still. It's a little different. There's something else that's.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah. So, I mean, how many of those Pelagos are in existence? If you had to guess, like, 30, 60, maybe ever.
Donut Operator
There's probably of these with the Gold Pelicans, the Gold pelagos, there's probably 150, maybe.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah, ever, maybe. And you got to be, like a special person to get one.
Donut Operator
It goes even worse than that because this the. The serial number on this one, it's attached to my name. So if this shows up on the black market somewhere, gray market Tudor will be like, what the hell? Because I can't sell it. I can't give it away.
Cody
So you're not allowed to sell it, period?
Donut Operator
Nope.
Cody
Oh, no.
Donut Operator
Shit, no. I can't sell this.
Cody
That's kind of cool.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
Watches are more regulated than, like, super bowl rings and Olympic medals. It's kind of wild.
Cody
I mean, some guns.
Fat Electrician
Do you have a unique thing that you can't give away?
Donut Operator
Can't give it away. I suppose my kids could inherit and whatever, but I'll probably just, you know, will it back to the team and give it to, you know, another guy.
Fat Electrician
Yeah.
Eli Double Tap
Thank you.
Fat Electrician
Thank you so much.
Brandon Herrera
That is so honored. Cherish that forever.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, we'll frame it.
Cody
That is a very, very funny comparison. Now that I think of, like, super American moments. Like, hey, hey, brother, can I buy that watch? Nah, sorry, I can't. But would you like this MG42?
Donut Operator
Well, yeah, if you don't live in California.
Brandon Herrera
So Gold Squadron, SEAL Team six.
Donut Operator
Yeah, we can say the number now. Yeah. When I was there, you didn't say the number.
Brandon Herrera
So, I mean, you were actual Seal Team 6.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, yeah. I mean, two of you now have been here. Talk to Terry. Tell him he sucks.
Donut Operator
Terry?
Fat Electrician
New guy like, Terry. Terry was a new guy winning.
Donut Operator
Yeah, he's like, two years after me. He showed up. I think it was green team 97 or 98.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah, dude.
Fat Electrician
That's why I was like, holy. He's like, you mean new guy Terry? I was like, bro.
Donut Operator
And I think I'm aging better than him.
Brandon Herrera
Anyway, anyway, I mean, to be fair, when Terry came on. So we had. We had to film two podcasts that night, and it was a Day before our big range day. And Eli didn't brief me like an. So Eli is like, so we filmed our. Our gang episode and now we have to go to. We're gonna go to the pre range day party for like 30 minutes. And we're come back, we're interview Terry. I was like, cool. Quick question, who the is Terry? Like, oh, it's that. That guy over there that showed up with Kevin. I was like, terry, I love you, but like, he's like this tall, like normal, average, blue collar looking dude. I was like, maybe he was an electrician for 50 years. I have no idea. And Eli's like, he was. He was the guy that saved Captain Phillips on the ship. I was like, oh, shit, Terry. Okay, yeah, no, I'll come back for that for sure. Yeah. Absolute.
Cody
It's like half the unsub guests, like, because we don't usually pick the guests. Like, it's usually just somebody that is anointed to us. And then like, I find out, like 10 minutes into the episode, I'm like, oh, they're cool. As I find out with the audience, like, we're asking genuine questions.
Fat Electrician
The guys are figuring out on spots like, wow, this is amazing.
Brandon Herrera
That's cool.
Fat Electrician
Christian Craighead.
Brandon Herrera
Here's Barry.
Cody
Here's even some exceptions. But, you know, even with like the.
Brandon Herrera
Pentagon episode, it's like, oh, hey, real quick, we're gonna just like streamline the top five sergeant majors in the entire army through your podcast. Real quick. And it's like, all five sergeant majors, if they were outside of uniform, that clearly showed, like, all their accomplishments would not be intimidating human beings at all. And all five of them are like, oh, shit. Homeboy's stats, Combat scuba and HALO jump expert. I'm gonna go sit in the corner, dude.
Fat Electrician
Rob Haney sat down and I like, just looked at his stack. I was like, holy, bro, you are stacked. He was like, what? And then Brandon, I'm like, I'm like.
Cody
Yo, There's a bit in the podcast where I literally just like tap Cody on the shoulder and I just lean back and I point at his stack. And Cody just goes, what the?
Brandon Herrera
Like, one of the most physically unassuming guys ever. And it's like, holy, start major.
Fat Electrician
And he worked through all three bat Ranger bats. And he was like, oh, yeah. And then I got Combat Diver and Halo. But when he talked about what was his Combat Diver story, they don't. You don't.
Brandon Herrera
He said, and I quote, I didn't technically drown.
Cody
That's so fun.
Brandon Herrera
About too much carbon Dioxide in my brain, and I passed out.
Fat Electrician
That's it. That's how we did.
Donut Operator
All right, we have done that.
Fat Electrician
How was your. Like, how many. You probably experienced.
Donut Operator
Oh, yeah, yeah. I got to do that in buds, actually. We're obstacle loading. And so you've got obstacles. We're doing the whole UDT thing where you, you know, put bombs on underwater obstacles. And, you know, we still do it because it's.
Cody
Yeah, like, for example, Russian pipelines and things.
Donut Operator
Well, I'm not gonna expand on that.
Fat Electrician
Technical difficulty.
Donut Operator
No, but I got down there, and you got to tie in your explosives to the trunk line so they all go up at the same time. And I'm down there tying the knot, and there's all this surge and I'm holding on thing, and you start chicken neck and you. And then I just didn't have to breathe anymore. I'm like, wow, that's kind of cool. And it's like everything was relaxed and wait, something's wrong here. But now your brain's starting to shut down. So I was like, what's wrong? I'm not sure. Holy crap. So I'm sitting there thinking about it, and I blew some bubbles and they went up. So I kicked up, and the next thing I know, I was on the surface. I passed out on the way up.
Brandon Herrera
What is like, I guess, what's your background? But, like, background as far as, like, where did you grow up? How did you grow up?
Donut Operator
Oh, I was a latchkey kid, you know, Pismo Beach, California. You know, aware of that place. It's a really nice town now. Back in the 70s, it was. It was kind of much smaller. We grew up poor up, you know, in a bunk house, me and my four brothers and, you know, just goofing off and running around, jumping off of things and, you know, just doing stupid, you know, climbing the hill and sliding down on cardboard and just being a boy. I'm just amazed that my brothers and I made it out of childhood with sight in both eyes and all our fingers attached.
Brandon Herrera
I'm gonna be honest. I might be one of, if not the foremost leading expert on war heroes in American history. Not a single story starts out with, like, this kid comes from an affluent family. Like, not a single one is, like, dad was rich, had a lot of money, love.
Fat Electrician
New love at a young age.
Donut Operator
I mean, I joined the Navy.
Eli Double Tap
What Bark was saying, like, yeah, I.
Donut Operator
Joined the Navy because I just. Both my folks were high school teachers and, like, you're going to go to college. Of course, we don't need Money, but you're gonna go to college. So I'm like, well, I'll figure it out. So I joined the Navy to get money for college. Had no idea, you know, what the hell I was doing. I get to boot camp, and it's so fun. Easy. It was just stupid easy. I'm like, just for the record, this.
Brandon Herrera
Is 1987 Boot Camp. 84 Boot Camp, when they were. Still had to, like, hit you a little bit easy. But come on, the drill instructor can't hit as hard as dad.
Cody
It's funny because, like, I was thinking about that.
Fat Electrician
You're like, drill sergeant is like a.
Cody
Not. Not a single American hero comes from an affluent family. It's like, yeah, you never do hear about those Medal of Honor recipients. Like, well, life started out when I was captain of the polo cross team.
Fat Electrician
There I was.
Cody
No. It's a lot of Sean Strickland stories. Not a lot of those.
Donut Operator
So I just. I was like, what else you got? I'm like, well, I got this UDT SEAL thing. I'm like, what the hell's that? Well, I get to jump out airplanes, shoot things, and blow shit up. I'm like, cool, sign me up. So I was just doing it for the challenge, basically. And, you know, I didn't really know what a SEAL was until I was one. It was like, wow, that's what we do. Cool.
Cody
Pardon my ignorance, but how long had the SEAL program been around before that?
Donut Operator
62 is when they started it up.
Brandon Herrera
That's the crazy part to me is, like, I don't know.
Donut Operator
I.
Brandon Herrera
Like, I have this mental block where I can't grasp because, like, I grew up in middle school watching, like, Making the Cut and, like, so everybody had a great grasp on, like, how insane. Special Forces, Navy Seals, Green Berets, 75th Ranger, all these guys, all their training was like, I can't fathom talking to a recruiter and just, like, having no idea what that meant. Be like, sure, I'll do it. And then just going into that program.
Donut Operator
Blind, it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Eli Double Tap
You know?
Donut Operator
I mean, what the hell?
Fat Electrician
At what moment?
Donut Operator
I was, what, 19, you know, 21. I went through buds. So, yeah, it was. You know, you're young and dumb and just figuring out, how many years did it take?
Fat Electrician
You started at your, like, what SEAL team did you start at? And then how long did it take to get to.
Donut Operator
Yeah, so I started off at SEAL Team 5. I was there for five years. Did four deployments in five years. And this is pre war. I was Just getting after it. I wanted to be out there if something happened. You know, I wanted to get in a fight. And that didn't. Well, I mean, I had a couple, you know, shaves, close calls, but, you know, I worked for Ronald Reagan, so, you know, Jesus Christ.
Cody
That's a. That's actually a crazy sentence now that you put it out there.
Brandon Herrera
You ever catch a trickle down ass whooping.
Cody
The tip of the spear on the war on drugs?
Donut Operator
Well, yeah.
Cody
Well. Well, there's a little more to it.
Donut Operator
But yeah, there's always a little more to it. Still don't want to.
Cody
Well, it started as a joke and then I thought about it.
Fat Electrician
So at what point were you like, when you got to Dev grew or.
Cody
What was your worst.
Fat Electrician
Actually, what was your worst day at like buds?
Donut Operator
Oh, worst day of buds. I would be in probably Wednesday or Thursday night when all my toenails fell off.
Cody
Jesus.
Donut Operator
Yeah, well, so the breakout is on Sunday night.
Brandon Herrera
I'm sorry, did you just say all your toenails fell off?
Donut Operator
Yeah, they turned black.
Fat Electrician
Jesus Christ.
Brandon Herrera
Fell off.
Fat Electrician
I'm more important. He said Wednesday or Thursday night. It was a very highly specific remembering the date.
Donut Operator
Well, I lost my socks the first night, okay. At the Steel Pier. And I didn't get a new pair of socks until Wednesday. And so when I pulled off my socks on, I think it was Thursday. Toenails came with me. Well, not all of them. I had to pull a couple off. They're hanging.
Cody
Oh yeah, that's not too bad.
Brandon Herrera
I'm glad you're not laughing like a psychopath.
Donut Operator
Time ago, man. I mean, what the hell? I only had two more days left.
Cody
Like, you know, the else. Can you do that?
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
I mean, Jesus, you just pull it.
Donut Operator
Off well and then the same time we have these health and you know, they look and make sure you're not, you know, nursing anything or that you got, you know, open sores or whatever. So you strip down naked and they, you know, look. Look you over and I had this huge blister their twist off.
Fat Electrician
I just booped you without booping you.
Brandon Herrera
You Eli.
Fat Electrician
The angry electrician.
Brandon Herrera
Does anybody else want nicotine? Actually.
Fat Electrician
I was like, it's earlier, Nick.
Brandon Herrera
Some are, some aren't. Okay, I poke you at lunch. Okay, Just.
Eli Double Tap
Just catching up on what's happening right now. Elon is in the next room giving his speech. We're out here doing our retard shit.
Brandon Herrera
Infinitely more interested in Mark over here, to be honest with you. I don't.
Fat Electrician
Oh, dude, I know. I'm like so Excited for Mark stories.
Cody
I can watch that on Twitter later. Can't do this later.
Donut Operator
Good point.
Fat Electrician
Not on YouTube.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah, not without Mark.
Cody
Yeah, well, I mean, well, the ironic part is I literally can't, but I need to do this part first.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
We have to live in the moment.
Donut Operator
In the moment. Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Dude. Thank you for joining. You're like a couple down working with Smith and Wesson.
Donut Operator
Yeah, that's my new gig. I'm the new gig.
Brandon Herrera
How new?
Donut Operator
I moved there in October from. From San Diego to Tennessee.
Brandon Herrera
What were you doing in San Diego?
Donut Operator
Well, for the last 13 years, I was teaching. I was a contract buds instructor. Teaching firearms. Weapons.
Brandon Herrera
So, I mean, God damn, it's got.
Cody
To be a hard gig in San Diego.
Brandon Herrera
Bait.
Donut Operator
It's not bad.
Brandon Herrera
Basically, the hefty majority of all seals in operation right now were taught by you.
Donut Operator
About 4,000 of them. Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
Jesus Christ, bro.
Fat Electrician
So you've shot like, oh, that kind of bullets?
Donut Operator
One or two.
Cody
Oh, I. I didn't catch the implication on that.
Eli Double Tap
I was thinking, Mark shot one person maybe.
Donut Operator
Maybe.
Fat Electrician
Holy. So you were just training on the contract? You. How many rounds did you train? Like at your peak? How many rounds were you shooting a day? We had like Tyler Gray when he was on last, he was like, oh, he was doing like a thousand rounds a day. He's like, yeah, it was like a thousand.
Donut Operator
About 5,000 a week is what we were shooting at. Damn. Neck. Pretty much. And that was pretty much year round.
Cody
Down, you know that 5, 000 day night a week. Oh, oh, oh, yeah.
Fat Electrician
That makes it.
Eli Double Tap
What the.
Cody
Yeah, we can't hear down here. Sorry.
Fat Electrician
But dude, 5,000 a week.
Donut Operator
That wasn't like just doing Magdalene like you're training?
Brandon Herrera
Yeah.
Donut Operator
What was that?
Eli Double Tap
That was Dev group training. Like 5, 000 a week? Yeah, me. Dude.
Brandon Herrera
What. What have you.
Cody
How can you hear us?
Brandon Herrera
Have you had your lead levels checked?
Donut Operator
Oh, yeah. They. They tested us once and then they. We asked what the results were and they're like, I think we need to recalibrate the machines. They just.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, they just gave you chemo?
Donut Operator
I used to have a really thick.
Brandon Herrera
Hit of hair for no reason.
Eli Double Tap
They just give you chemo? I think you're gonna need it.
Brandon Herrera
Mark's immune to X rays.
Cody
The machine's not working right.
Fat Electrician
That's weird.
Cody
I literally, when I had my fight last year. Year or God, now it's like a. Almost two years ago. Yeah. That's horrible. I. I was getting all those tests, like they make you do like an STD test and everything. Because you're going to be, you know, spilling blood and like that. So they make you get all these tests done. I threw in a lead level check in the mix because I was like, I should probably know that. I was like, oh, that number's not too bad. It was like a nine point something like, oh, that's not bad. Well, that's red. It's red though. I should probably. And I googled like dangerous starts at like 6. I was like, oh, that's cool.
Donut Operator
Who might have to look into that? I don't know really.
Cody
You probably should. I don't know what the fix is, to be honest.
Eli Double Tap
What do we know, Mark? What do we know?
Donut Operator
I'm just gonna keep doing what I'm doing until I'm done, you know. The hell.
Eli Double Tap
What was your favorite rocket surgeon?
Donut Operator
Fuck it.
Cody
A rocket surgeon.
Fat Electrician
What was your favorite weapon to train with? Like as you.
Cody
He's a rocket surgeon.
Fat Electrician
New ones integrated into the system.
Donut Operator
The one I was most excited to start training with was the MP5 just because it was the coolest thing, you know, going. But you know, and we did for years, that was the any self respecting counterterrorist unit in the world. After Princess Gate happened, you know, with H and K up front and center, that's what you had. So that was, that was probably the most fun. But honestly, M4, you know, the, the, the shorty version of the M4, those. That's like the most practical thing. It's more effective. You know, MP5 is good out to 50, maybe 100 yards and.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah, when did, when did you get out?
Donut Operator
I retired in 2010.
Brandon Herrera
Did that around like 300 blackout or anything before you got out.
Donut Operator
That was just kind of starting to come in. Oh geez. We were looking at it when I was at warcom in like 06 05. They were, you know, trying to figure out they were doing the, the six eight SPC, you know, thing. Oh, it's whatever.
Fat Electrician
Kevin's a friend.
Donut Operator
Kevin.
Fat Electrician
300 blackout dude that created that. The honey badger and everything.
Donut Operator
300 blackout is an awesome freaking round. But it's specifically for a short gun and to be subsonic because 5.56 subsonic sucks.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah.
Cody
Yeah.
Donut Operator
And it's stupid. You know why? You know you're not even shooting a 22 at somebody at that point.
Cody
Right? Because I mean the whole purpose of 556223 is that it's traveling at 3,000 plus feet per second.
Donut Operator
It is out of a 22 inch or a 20 inch tube.
Cody
Yeah.
Donut Operator
But as you cut that Barrel down it gets. It goes a little slower and then it doesn't yaw as fast. Plus they put a tighter twist to make it more accurate. The original has a 1 in 12, so that thing's barely stable. So as soon as it hit flesh, it turns over and it does just amazing things to flesh.
Brandon Herrera
Have you ever around the new 8.6 at all?
Donut Operator
No, but I want to.
Cody
Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile.
Fat Electrician
I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same Premium.
Cody
Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities.
Donut Operator
So do like I did and have.
Fat Electrician
One of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today.
Cody
I'm told it's super easy to do@mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment of 45 for 3.
Brandon Herrera
Month plan equivalent to 15 per month. Required intro rate first 3 months only.
Cody
Then full price plan options available, taxes.
Donut Operator
And fees, extra fee, full terms@mintmobile.com come down, man.
Brandon Herrera
You come out to Iowa. We got you fat pews is there okay?
Cody
Come out to Iowa so you can have a one on one dinner date with Nick or you can come down with the rest of us.
Brandon Herrera
You get to hang out with.
Fat Electrician
You know, I was in the Navy, kids.
Brandon Herrera
That's fine. You're not gonna scare me.
Cody
God damn it.
Fat Electrician
Hard cut. Nick's crying.
Cody
No, he scared me.
Brandon Herrera
Scared me.
Eli Double Tap
San Antonio. San Antonio.
Donut Operator
Hey, I dig me some Texas too, man.
Cody
Hell yeah, dude.
Fat Electrician
You'll love that. That 86 like Terry watch. Text Terry about it and ask him about it because that round is. We've all talked about it. You have a 4 inch barrel and you're fine. It's a 1 to 3 twist rate and the all subsonic and when it hits, it explodes.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Wild.
Cody
I wonder if they can hear the random increments of bass that just come from the. The actual auditorium.
Fat Electrician
Dude, it's. It's more weird as people like when I was readjusting the cameras, they're like, hey, these people are coming through.
Brandon Herrera
Do you.
Fat Electrician
Do you want them on your podcast? I was like, no, I saw that. Please.
Cody
Some of the, some of the people they were asking about, I overheard that. It's like, who the. No.
Fat Electrician
Yeah. Oh, thank you so much. We're gonna move the needle.
Cody
Yeah. It's like, would you like the college. College conservative party leader of El Salvador? It's like, not really. No.
Fat Electrician
So what do you like you done? What was your most like the best part of your military career? Especially in goal team?
Donut Operator
Oh, well, Being assaulter on goal team was. That was like, that's the pinnacle. You know, we get. We did three months in. In Afghanistan with a second group over there, and we're still trying to figure things out. You know, going after, you know, Elvis sightings is where he started calling him, because, you know, hey, he might be here and whatever. Elvis wasn't in the building.
Fat Electrician
He's saying Cody can't hear it.
Donut Operator
Yeah. And even if I speak louder into this thing, you're not gonna hear anymore.
Fat Electrician
But sound off, dog.
Cody
That's the about it.
Eli Double Tap
We could. People watch and just sit here and have a good time.
Fat Electrician
They were doing Elvis sightings in Afghanistan.
Donut Operator
Yeah. Just.
Cody
Yeah.
Donut Operator
Looking for the. The man.
Cody
Yeah.
Donut Operator
And he wasn't around.
Cody
But the man, the myth, the water burial.
Eli Double Tap
Sorry.
Cody
Too hardcore.
Fat Electrician
I love you.
Donut Operator
I mean, we were still going in hot, you know, still going, you know, as if something was there. Even on, you know, you don't know it's a dry target until you check it out. And the last mission, I got injured. It was. They advertised TF160, advertised a 20 foot fast rope. I'm like, cool. And I was like the last guy out, and I'm looking down and there's. It's 110 foot fast rope and there's maybe 10ft of it on the. On the deck. I was like, well, that's a little more. But because it was a. They advertised a short one. I have my, you know, little shooter gloves on it and my fast rope gloves on. So I went zipping down that thing. As I'm looking out, I was like the last guy off the plane. I'm looking around, go, this doesn't look like the pictures, you know, and we were on the wrong target anyway, so I zipped down there and I. I hit. And you kind of push the rope away and go to grab your gun. And I stepped back. When I did that. Well, I thought I was in the middle of this building. I was actually. My heels were on the edge. And when I stepped back, I stepped back in. Done nothing.
Brandon Herrera
Oh.
Donut Operator
So I. Yeah. You know, on nods and just. So I fall back. And the last thing that goes through your head before you die. I was just really disappointed. I was like, I'm dead as I fell, you know, and then I start hitting you. Boom, boom, boom. And then you stop falling. You know, you come to a stop and you're like, I'm not dead. And then you got to figure out, all right, what's going on here? And there's this animal in this pen made of sticks that's like going nuts. I'm like, this cow's gonna come out here and stomp me to. So no time to wait for the backboard. So I did a quick systems check.
Cody
Animal way better than a bunch of Arabic speaking dudes.
Donut Operator
Yeah, well, so I get up.
Brandon Herrera
The animals think that too.
Cody
Thank you for that beautiful swipe off the teeth.
Donut Operator
It turned out they were goats, but, you know, that's, you know, anyway.
Fat Electrician
Holy shit.
Cody
Thank God. Thank God it's an American.
Donut Operator
Yeah. So I got my back together. My. My back was hurting, my leg was up. My. My nods tried to poke my eyes out. So I had. But I had clear eye pro underneath. That's the only reason I've got eyes to see you with right now, because it was literally just knocked me out. So I picked myself up and I can't move real good. My back's just pinching me. But, you know, one of the guys told me later when they saw me go off the edge, they looked down. When I hit, my camelback was full of water. It burst. So they see me laying there in a spreading pool of black liquid going, well, okay, coach is dead. How the we off this building? You know, off the roof?
Cody
Jesus.
Donut Operator
So I got my comms back on. I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm not dead. And I just kind of found a place where I could see them on the roof and kind of deconflict.
Cody
How far was the drop?
Donut Operator
It was two stories. I hit the. The top of the second story or off the. Off the second story. I hit the edge of the first story, the top of the animal pen as I hit and kind of spun me around and landed me in the. In the yard.
Fat Electrician
There's no depth perception, like, oh, yeah.
Donut Operator
I mean, it wouldn't have mattered at that point. I mean, I stepped backwards into nothing. But so frogman luck, right? If I'd gone off two sides, it was. I would have landed on the. On the next deck down. Where I fell was two. And then that side over there was 100ft before it would have touched anything. So I really would have been dead had it been just 90 degrees off. So.
Brandon Herrera
Jesus.
Cody
Luckily, that camelback probably saved a lot of your fall too.
Donut Operator
It might have. I mean, body armor on. You got a helmet and all, you know, fair crash tested the helmet.
Cody
That's a word?
Donut Operator
Yeah. And then I did this big, like, meatball on my. On my shin. Big hematoma that came up. So, like, when the sun came up, they medevac me and one other Guy who fell off another roof. It was. It was a shit show.
Fat Electrician
Wait, two people fell?
Donut Operator
Yeah. Yeah, but he fell on the one. One story and just fell on his back. Yeah. Anyway.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah, he only fell one story.
Cody
In the middle of the night when full kit.
Fat Electrician
You did the entire evening.
Donut Operator
I finished out. Yeah. And then, you know, in the morning, he kilo came in and, you know, I couldn't do, you know, dynamic clearance, obviously, but I found a. A useful job, you know, watching a polling security area.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Hey, don't trust me. I know, bro. You get 0 off for me. 10 to 2.
Donut Operator
I'm good, I'm good. Yeah, I got you. Because I told my. I can't move. I'm just going to stand here because I wasn't really mobile at that point.
Brandon Herrera
Professional mag dumper.
Fat Electrician
I'm gonna watch it right here. And that's it. I'll kill anything, though, right here.
Donut Operator
Yeah, yeah. Watch out. I know. I own this, right? Yeah. So they medevac me and went to the hospital and they kept me for a couple of days and they wanted to operate. And I was like, we're going home in a couple days. Fuck this. I'll just wait till I get home. And so I got surgery when. When everybody else went home, we landed and I went to the hospital to get my. My leg worked on.
Eli Double Tap
Jesus.
Donut Operator
And then my shoulder was jacked up. I couldn't. It was just impinged because it, you know, in the fall, whatever, slap, tear and some other stuff. And when we got back, we found out we're gonna be the guys that invade Iraq. I'm like, I'm not going under the knife now. I ain't missing that. So they shot me with the. The light.
Brandon Herrera
Cortisone.
Donut Operator
Yeah, cortisol.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah, whatever.
Donut Operator
Cortisone.
Fat Electrician
Oh, lidocaine.
Donut Operator
Oh, yeah, yeah. And it was like, I just.
Brandon Herrera
It didn't hurt.
Donut Operator
I just couldn't get my arm higher than this. And then they shot that.
Brandon Herrera
I was like, it's not supposed to do that, but I can do it anyways.
Donut Operator
So we trained it for a couple of months, and they gave me another shot on the way, you know, out and said, that's the two you get when you get home. We got to do surgery. So that was the, you know, so I got to go, you know, invade Iraq, which was cool.
Fat Electrician
Oh, dang you. So you were.
Cody
Man, it's so loud here. I wish they would. I wish this giant conference would close their doors and be considerate of our five man podcast. So what's that show? Was that actually Elon up there? Nice. Yeah.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, God.
Brandon Herrera
So at dinner last night, he, like, brought up Osama and.
Cody
How inconsiderate.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
And I, like, kind of brought it into, like. Oh, if you know the reason to hate Clinton. The. The dude I just did the whole 90 minute video on Billy Wa. He. He was sent in to Sudan, I.
Cody
Think, wow, what an expert.
Brandon Herrera
In, like, the 1990s, he got sent into Sudan and was basically put in charge of, like, trailing Osama bin Laden. He was, like, almost 70 at the time, spying on the guy. And he comes to the conclusion of, like, he's like a religious leader on top of being a regular leader. We should just take this guy out now and not worry about it in the 90s.
Cody
And plot twist, he does it. 2001, the Towers Fall anyway.
Brandon Herrera
You go back in time and save flight, whatever, the. And then the towers still fall.
Donut Operator
Those loose change guys got something there, huh?
Brandon Herrera
No. So he ends up, like, tailing Osama bin Laden for a while, and he's like, we should just take this dude out. And he. He writes up an op order for the CIA, and he's like, hey, I kind of just want to kill this guy. And then we're going to throw him over the Iranian embassy wall with a flashbang grenade to get news coverage and blame it on somebody else. And it makes it all the way to Bill Clinton's desk. And Bill Clinton's like, no, we're not doing that. Please don't ask about this again. So they pull him off the case, and Osama bin Laden is basically allowed to grow Al Qaeda for another 10 years, uninterrupted, interrupted. And he's like. Like. One of the biggest regrets he writes about is, like, if I had known what he'd done, he's like, I would. I had an apartment overlooking his compound. I took pictures of him daily. I could have absolutely gotten a shot off. He's like, I wish I'd have taken.
Cody
Him out right then back when it was Tim Osman.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah.
Donut Operator
This.
Fat Electrician
Do you know that this is the guy that caught the Jackal? Do you know this story?
Donut Operator
Yeah, he was telling me last night.
Brandon Herrera
I told him last night at dinner.
Fat Electrician
It was wild story. It's like, Carlos the Jackal is the most notorious assassin, and it's the same dude that caught that guy.
Brandon Herrera
Went in, caught him in like a month. Dude was on the run for like, nine governments for 18 years. And they sent in Billy Wall and he's like, yep.
Fat Electrician
Found him at a market.
Brandon Herrera
Rented. Huh.
Fat Electrician
At a marketplace or something.
Brandon Herrera
So he put in an order for a new bodyguard, and they intercepted it. And Billy Wall, like, tracked down the new bodyguard, found the bodyguard, went to his apartment, found out where the guy lived, paid off the landlord to buy out the apartment directly above him, and was spying on him.
Cody
That's why you always tip your landlord.
Fat Electrician
Brandon Herrera. Tip your landlord. No, no.
Brandon Herrera
And so he, like, spying on the guy, and he's like, oh, he has a toothache. And then they pay off the local dentist. Dentist. To give him a call and be like, yeah, we're offering free checkups, blah, blah, blah, blah. And get the Jackal to go in for a free dental checkup because he has a toothache. And they're like, oh, yeah, you need a root canal. You want that done now? Oh, sure, why not? Hit him with laughing gas. Mother wakes up on a plane headed to France in handcuffs. Still in jail to this day.
Cody
Did he ever fix his teeth?
Brandon Herrera
I don't care. Him.
Fat Electrician
Holy shit.
Cody
No. That was. Speaking of the Clintons, it was very funny this morning to be walking past. I don't know if anybody else thinks like this, because it's just very funny to me. Walking past the very desks that Clinton and Monica Lewinsky. Yeah. It's apparently a big highlight of Trump Mom's personal tours.
Brandon Herrera
You want to see where Monica Lewinsky had a book deal?
Cody
Do you want to see where the blue dress was minted?
Brandon Herrera
In the words of Dave Chappelle, you ever been so famous that somebody could suck your dick? And then they're famous? You got sexually transmitted fame. It's insane.
Cody
I feel like if anybody's got its potus, you know? Meanwhile, I'm walking through. We're walking through the West Wing this morning. We're getting, like, a very private. Just like a little tour, like, very quick little run around, and we're going through. And my brain, unfortunately works in cinema, like, I know yours does. So we're walking out the West Wing toward, like, I guess, like, where the presidential entrance is past the Oval Office. And I turn to Cody and I go, dude, this is where that firefight.
Brandon Herrera
From Civil War happened.
Fat Electrician
He's just breaking that down.
Eli Double Tap
You remember that?
Fat Electrician
Oh, yeah.
Eli Double Tap
The last firefight.
Fat Electrician
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Eli Double Tap
And I turn around, I'm like, oh, yeah, this is it.
Cody
It was like a kid in a candy store. I say this to Cody, he just goes, oh.
Eli Double Tap
Because, like, I'm such a cinema buff. I turn around and I'm like, oh, oh, this is it. Breakout, breakout, breakout. Where the dudes are going down the core, the Corridor, going to the Oval Office. We walked down that hallway, and I was like, oh, that's the thing that happened in that movie, dude.
Fat Electrician
That was a wild experience. Like, from each location from the Pentagon to the White House. And then how they walk you through the White House. Also cold as balls in D.C. yeah.
Brandon Herrera
It'S not that bad.
Cody
You man.
Fat Electrician
Okay, Tank top, man.
Cody
Right now, Texas in the. Is in the middle of an apocalypse because it is 28 degrees right now.
Brandon Herrera
With wind chill. It was negative 34 when I left my house. It was not a big deal. You should man up.
Cody
God hates Iowa.
Fat Electrician
Also wild experience to be, like, for the White House today. None of us knew anything going into that, so we were just like. And then we have to talk. And they were like, whoa. Hi. Okay.
Cody
We had a talk. Yeah.
Eli Double Tap
We just went in there to say hey to everyone.
Cody
Yeah.
Eli Double Tap
And then.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah, that's what happened.
Eli Double Tap
We had a guide through the whole thing.
Cody
Yeah. Big shout out. Sebgorka.
Eli Double Tap
Good friend Sebastian Gorka took us through the entire thing.
Cody
That was randomly just texting, like, hey, dude, I already. I have a meeting in the Eisenhower building today. Like, can we just, like, do you have, like, two minutes? I know you're super busy. He came in, like, took us on a whole tour and everything. It's just rad because.
Fat Electrician
Did you get to watch that switch, too, from, like, Full War, where I guarantee they were like, here, do whatever you want.
Donut Operator
And you're like, the longer you're in a situation, just. It's like, you know, the frog in the boiling water, Right? It's like the roes change just a little bit, and they creep up on. And next thing you know, you can't do unless you're calling up, you know, hey, can I shoot this guy that just shot at me? Yeah. And then the bad guys, they learn this stuff. You know, they take a couple shots, they'll drop their gun, and, you know, they're standing in the field. You can't shoot them. The new KFC Dunk it bucket with.
Cody
Juicy original recipe tenders, new mashed potato poppers, crispy fries, plus three sauces that fit right on top of the lid. So you can dunk anywhere. You can dunk at the game. Dunk while security points to the no outside food sign and dunk as 20,000 people watch you and your Dunk it bucket get removed from the stadium. Dunk almost anywhere with the new $7 KFC Dunkit bucket or get the Double Dunk it bucket for 25. Prices and participation vary while supplies last. Taxes Tips and fees extra.
Fat Electrician
And we talked about, I always say when we went into the last aoe, it was a mokdadilla. And they're like, hey, if they're suspicious, shoot them. We're like, oh, this is a real bad area. I was like, we've never had this ROE before. I was like, that is a crazy statement.
Donut Operator
Suspicious. Yeah, yeah.
Fat Electrician
I was like, that's a crazy statement for us. Okay, well, here we go. But then it was like, anyone with a cell phone, you think it's just bad, dude. Fucking bad dude, no matter what.
Donut Operator
Yeah. Well, when we did the, the Jessica lynch raid, you were on that too. Yeah, yeah.
Brandon Herrera
Terry was on that too.
Donut Operator
Yeah, yeah.
Fat Electrician
Is that how you met new guy?
Donut Operator
No, he'd been around for a little while, but, you know, this was 2000, what, three. So yeah, he'd been around for a few years. But yeah, what they did is they basically changed the roes for on Nazarea. So all these guys that were running around thinking that they're good to go, all of a sudden the snipers along the river just were smoking military age males. Like it was, you know, first day of hunting season. Because these guys had no idea. Like, oh, yeah, I'm too far away. I can't, you know. Yeah. Oh, I know one guy got 30. Really? Oh, yeah. It's like they didn't get on the phone and talk to each other and going, oh, man. Yeah, keep your head down. No smoking them. So that caused a. They had a little fight there at the bridge. And so when we went in, we coordinated the assault that the marines were doing on the, on the bridge with our takedown of the hospital. And we found that the. There was like 300 of the Saddam fitting jackasses that were using the basement of that hospital as their. That's where they planned everything. They knew it wouldn't get bombed because it's a hospital. So they were in the basement doing all that and they went to go fight the marines at the, at the bridge and, and we came in, no one was home. And, you know, went, we, we landed, did a little run around. I mean, we had some intel on the place and yeah, we, we found her in six minutes. And we're flying, she was flying away in 16.
Brandon Herrera
I, I have a friend that has a fedain helmet. It's one of the funniest things to me on the planet. Do you know about the fedayeen helmet?
Fat Electrician
No.
Brandon Herrera
If you look at a Iraqi fedayeen helmet.
Fat Electrician
Wait, is that under the sabers?
Brandon Herrera
No, like the, it Was his, like, special Iranian helmets.
Fat Electrician
Oh, okay.
Brandon Herrera
So that was like, there's his special forces or whatever. The Iranian Fedayeen helmet looks shockingly like Darth Vader's helmet. And it's because it was modeled after Darth Vader's helmet because they were a huge fan of Star Wars. I'm dead ass serious. Like, look up a fed I. E. Helmet. It looks like Darth Vader's dome piece. And it's because of Darth Vader.
Fat Electrician
They're just like, that's dope. Yep.
Donut Operator
Let's do that.
Eli Double Tap
Pretty cool.
Fat Electrician
So I wish our military was like, that's dope ass armor. Let's roll that. That will scare the fuck out of people. Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
The funny part is, like, I identify with the bad guy.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
You know what I mean? What'd he do? He nuked a whole planet. Let's model after his helmet. For sure. Nobody, nobody will have sympathy for me when I die 100%, you know?
Fat Electrician
How do you get one?
Brandon Herrera
Huh?
Fat Electrician
How did he get one?
Brandon Herrera
I redacted. Don't worry about it.
Fat Electrician
I remember the saber ones. Like, we got to go there once. I was like, oh, these in winter of the. All these helmets right here. Then they explain like, oh, yeah, Iran. Yeah. I was like, oh, I had no clue on that.
Donut Operator
There was supposedly a million of them. Million Iranian helmets there, you know, all baked into the. The monument.
Fat Electrician
The two weird sabers.
Donut Operator
Yeah. They were both Saddam's hand, apparently, or I don't know.
Brandon Herrera
Here you go, Eli.
Cody
What?
Brandon Herrera
Holy. That is straight after Darth Vader's helmet.
Donut Operator
Yep.
Brandon Herrera
What it was model.
Fat Electrician
I'm going to go.
Brandon Herrera
The Iraqi Fedayeen helmet was modeled out after Darth Vader's helmet.
Cody
That is 100% what that is. Also. I'm sorry. I went to use the restroom. How did we get on this?
Brandon Herrera
He was there.
Cody
Well, that's right. That tracks.
Donut Operator
We were just talking about, you know.
Brandon Herrera
Iraq, and according to this, Saddam Hussein was a huge Star wars fan and wanted his special forces to look like Darth Vader.
Cody
It's crazy. Hitler was the same, which is why he wanted all of his officers to look just like the imperial elite, you know, admirals and such.
Donut Operator
Well, and so I wasn't on this, but our guys hit either Uday or Kousse's house, and he had a big, big video collection, Right. And he had this one shelf that was, like, favorites. And one of his favorite movie was Navy SEALS Baby with Charlie.
Cody
Really?
Donut Operator
I got a picture of Rosie holding.
Cody
Up going, you know, Navy SEALS with Charlie Sheen.
Donut Operator
Yeah.
Cody
Jesus Christ. I was hoping you were gonna say Hot Shots part two. I war. It's fantastic.
Brandon Herrera
So we talked about this earlier, but during CPAC, you know Jake McNasty, the guy that had the, the Mohawk during DBA.
Donut Operator
I've seen your.
Brandon Herrera
So yeah, at the end of his career, they raided Hermann Goring's castle. And Hermann Goring apparently was really into like equestrian fucking horse racing. So whenever they would raid a country, like all the top breeding racehorses got brought to his castle. So when they raided it, the 101st Airborne had all these elite level breeding racehorses there. And the 101st Airborne is like it. Let's have a roadie video. I, I don't think I said it in the video because I was fairly new to long form content, but. Oh my God, like running some of the horses to death, unfortunately. But they were just around having a rodeo with this elite level racehorses.
Cody
The survivors went on to become owned by Glock? Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
Pretty much.
Cody
I, I, I say that as a joke. Elite level German racehorses, lineage wise, that.
Brandon Herrera
European in general at that point.
Cody
Unfair. Plenty were probably originally French.
Brandon Herrera
So they stole all these racehorses and they were just basically dicking off in the 101st Airborne Division having a rodeo for the townsfolk. And then Jake McNasty ends up the daughter of the guy that led the German youth in that area. So basically just fucking, you know, the closest thing he could find to a Nazi princess.
Cody
Yeah, I mean the, the, like the Hitler Youth.
Brandon Herrera
Yeah.
Cody
Oh shit.
Brandon Herrera
It was like the leader's daughter is who Jake McNasty was hooking up with while he was racing or having a rodeo with equestrian. That is the race horses.
Donut Operator
I'm sure there wasn't any.
Brandon Herrera
That is the definition of zero.
Cody
None flag over a Concord Castle. Come on. Meanwhile, and then he became laughing. Nigel Farage just passed behind us. Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Who?
Brandon Herrera
Nigel Farage.
Donut Operator
Dude, he used to be a prime minister or something.
Cody
He's a fan of the eu. Yeah, yeah. No, he was the one who led out the whole Brexit movement. Yeah, it's just wild to just see the random passerbys here.
Brandon Herrera
I'm not going to lie. I forgot for like the past hour we were in the middle of a hallway with, with thousands of people walking by.
Cody
We didn't.
Brandon Herrera
I, I did. Cody.
Donut Operator
Slur.
Eli Double Tap
What's up?
Brandon Herrera
What are we slurring now?
Donut Operator
Trying not to.
Eli Double Tap
We need to do some slurs.
Brandon Herrera
I'm drinking for it.
Cody
Eli's using the restroom, I believe.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, that means I can slur.
Brandon Herrera
Now you know how hard it is to find a Burger king crown in D.C. on a Thursday at five in the afternoon?
Cody
I know. I don't know if I've ever told this on the podcast. I bought a 10 pack of them on ebay specifically for our live tour, so.
Brandon Herrera
Why?
Fat Electrician
Why?
Cody
You know why?
Brandon Herrera
I was gonna.
Cody
I was gonna give them five locations.
Brandon Herrera
Why did you need a 10 pack?
Cody
Because I was gonna give it to. To one of everybody in our crew and we were just gonna board the fucking plane at once with Burger King cat gats. And those flight attendants would be so scared. Either that or they knew they were about to go viral, so.
Eli Double Tap
Hey, by the way, why did that plane go upside down?
Cody
Yeah, the one in Canada.
Donut Operator
I'm watching it. I. I've seen it. It comes in, it looks like it's making a good landing, and all of a sudden it just kind of flips.
Brandon Herrera
I mean, it looks like it's going a little fast.
Donut Operator
Maybe I am.
Brandon Herrera
I unanswered expert opinion.
Donut Operator
Yeah, I'm not a pilot in any. Any. Any means.
Cody
They said something about landing gear not fully deploying or something, but it looked like it slapped the Runway pretty good and, like, that's what snapped the wing.
Eli Double Tap
I guess it was deployed. Yeah, I've seen a plane land before. A couple million times.
Cody
I have no idea. Weird.
Brandon Herrera
I wonder why they haven't announced who the pilots are yet.
Eli Double Tap
Who was flying the plane.
Cody
I believe it's Coulter's law.
Eli Double Tap
This is the hardest podcast I've ever done because I can't hear that you guys are saying, oh, I can pick up on mark a little bit.
Fat Electrician
I gotta sound off higher. Done. Cody, I got you, bro. Yeah, we.
Cody
We can't hear down on this side.
Fat Electrician
No, it is, like, on. The audio is really good, though. Like, we have so good audio, which is insane.
Cody
That's bananas to me.
Fat Electrician
If you turn the camera around, it is Mars.
Donut Operator
Get that close enough.
Fat Electrician
Probably sucks.
Cody
Like, that mic's definitely unusable.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cody
We should just cut in on that mic right now just so people know what this sounds like.
Fat Electrician
Even directed this way, it's like, I don't even know. Okay, we're good. We're good. I was, like, checking my time. What is going on, dude? And then the people stopping me in the bathroom.
Donut Operator
You're getting people stopping you in the bathroom?
Fat Electrician
Yeah, but they're wanting to talk to you.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, Eli.
Cody
What?
Eli Double Tap
Big camera.
Donut Operator
Hey, do you know Brandon? His hair is so nice.
Fat Electrician
That's all they said. Wait, what?
Brandon Herrera
Who?
Fat Electrician
Cody? What?
Eli Double Tap
I don't know who that is.
Fat Electrician
Which one?
Donut Operator
I don't know.
Eli Double Tap
There's a big camera.
Cody
See, that's the crazy part. Nobody knows who that is.
Donut Operator
Nobody.
Cody
They have a very big camera.
Donut Operator
They're European or something.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, it's like YouTube.
Eli Double Tap
Sit in front of a webcam and make millions of dollars.
Fat Electrician
Though, on the positive note, people are, like, looking at this like this, but they're like, are you. You're doing the podcast out front? I was like, yeah. It's like. And then, you know Brandon. I was like, yeah, yeah.
Cody
I've met him once or twice.
Fat Electrician
We have cross pads. Like, oh, okay, okay, okay. I was like, yeah. Talk to him, though, if you want to. We're gonna finish this up. And like, what are we at? Where are we at?
Donut Operator
No idea. 11:29, 11:30, 15 minutes.
Brandon Herrera
Sure.
Fat Electrician
It's too easy, dog. Too easy. Dude, this is Brandon. Are you. Are you going to do the politic thingy again?
Cody
What do you mean?
Fat Electrician
Are you going to do the politic thingy again?
Donut Operator
You almost got it last time.
Cody
We came very close and, like, I'll. I'll say this. I'm very proud of my team. They did a amazing job. Considering, you know, we were outspent 12 million to one and came within 400 votes of an entrenched incumbent. That. That was really cool. I was. I was really proud of that. I have no desire to be in D.C. i'll tell you that. This is probably one of my least favorite cities in the world. I really like my job. I like my friends. I like what I'm doing now. So if I decide to do it again in the future, it's not going to be because I need it or want it. It's going to be for it's. It's greater good kind of shit. But I. I don't want to be here, man.
Donut Operator
I hear you.
Cody
Yeah, I'm sure. I don't think anybody here really likes DC to be honest.
Donut Operator
I haven't been here much.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, we don't do politics unsubs. Like, so, like, Brandon's done politics and everything, but as us as a whole, as a team, it's just like, well, fun. We'll talk about, like, what you're doing, but we're not. Not.
Cody
We're not. We're not really apolitical. Like, we're pretty, like, pro gun and stuff like that. Things that are just, like, inherently political. But we don't just sit there the whole time, like, have you seen the news? Like, we don't do that.
Fat Electrician
We love it. Like, hey, like, we like shooting guns. We like being able to say we talk freedom thing. Yeah, we like freedom. Crazy content, you know, kind of.
Donut Operator
The country was kind of built on it. I don't know. Just, you know, is that political?
Cody
A bunch of guys wrote a letter a long time ago that seems like it was pretty important.
Fat Electrician
Yeah, they drank a lot.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah. A bunch of 19, 30 year olds.
Cody
Yep.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah.
Cody
How much that last night? 55 gentlemen.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah. What they drank, though.
Fat Electrician
You know how much?
Donut Operator
I've seen that, Bill. Yeah.
Fat Electrician
How much is like 55 individual? 55 gentlemen. And they spent. It's like 20 grand. Modern time or something stupid.
Cody
No, it was like. I think it was like $18,000 modern.
Fat Electrician
Which is still between five friends.
Donut Operator
Yeah. That's a good night out, man.
Fat Electrician
18, dude, bro, you're waking up after s. You don't know you made America. When you wake up.
Donut Operator
Here we go.
Eli Double Tap
You wake up and you're like, holy, we made a nation. I've got it.
Cody
The. The bar tab of the 1787 Fairway Farewell Party for George Washington. The founding fathers drank 54 bottles of madeiera, 60 bottles of claret, eight bottles of whiskey, 22 bottles of porter, eight bottles of hard cider, 12 of beer, seven bowls of alcoholic punch. There were 55 attendees, bro.
Fat Electrician
Eight bottles of whiskey.
Eli Double Tap
Okay.
Cody
Eight bottles of whiskey with 55 people is already, like, kind of like, all right, everybody's going to have an okay now night.
Eli Double Tap
I think it was one of the guys that said we should have 55 of our friends over, and we do that same thing.
Cody
Try to recreate, like, the Founding Fathers.
Eli Double Tap
The founding fathers party.
Fat Electrician
Does the Founding Fathers. Maybe not that title, but.
Donut Operator
Gang bang the Founding Father.
Fat Electrician
Switch that one out. The gang drinks a lot.
Cody
All right, Eli's over here thinking of, like, the constitutional equivalent of Debbie Does Dallas.
Fat Electrician
Oh, I would hate that. Next day you're coming.
Cody
Oh, that's going to be 55 of.
Fat Electrician
Us, and we have to finish it all.
Cody
Oh, that's the bit. We have to finish it.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, we have 55 of our closest friends, and we have to finish it all just as the founding fathers intended it.
Donut Operator
Yep.
Fat Electrician
Dude. Kim's.
Cody
And then we shoot Terrible.
Eli Double Tap
Defeat.
Donut Operator
An empire trying to Blair Witch Project.
Cody
Like, and then I hear there's a boat full of tea coming into the harbor. Yeah.
Fat Electrician
Holy.
Cody
But the camera's doing what the people are. And, like, the further you get in the video, the more that the vignette just, like, closes in. The frame rate goes down to, like, eight frames a second.
Donut Operator
Yeah, dude, like, just double.
Fat Electrician
I'm trying to do the map moments of lucidity.
Eli Double Tap
Are you good, bro?
Fat Electrician
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm here. A bottle of whiskey is. We do that with, like, five of us.
Cody
It's like, Jack, how I think it. It really matters how long the party is because there's a difference between consuming that in three hours versus, like, 10 hours.
Eli Double Tap
Well, it was the bottles plus the seven bowls of alcohols of alcoholic punch.
Donut Operator
How big is a bowl? They didn't really say.
Cody
They didn't specify.
Eli Double Tap
It's definitely going to be like, we.
Cody
Don'T want to pussy out on the founding Fathers.
Donut Operator
No, no, no. Punch bowl. Yeah.
Cody
Punch bowl.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah.
Cody
Go to Walmart. Buy a punch bowl.
Donut Operator
That generic Mark 1 motto. Punch bowl.
Cody
We're gonna need more. Oh, God, I wish we had more than 55 people because that's. That's a heavy order, dude.
Fat Electrician
We are, like, all of us are hurting, that is.
Cody
And we have to record the podcast after I would quit.
Donut Operator
Do a piece of it every, like, hour as you go along.
Fat Electrician
Oh, yeah.
Cody
Oh, that's actually a really funny idea.
Donut Operator
Watch us all go into this new hour.
Eli Double Tap
1 hour, 2 hour, 3 hour.
Fat Electrician
5 through 10 is us passed out. We have not moved. Yeah, it's just.
Cody
That's actually really funny.
Eli Double Tap
It looks like Johannesburg.
Cody
We should. Oh, I've got an idea you guys are going to hate because it's going to lock us in on it. We should do this for the 4th of July.
Fat Electrician
I wish I was younger.
Eli Double Tap
Brandon's Eli, you're not getting any younger.
Donut Operator
You wish you were younger.
Eli Double Tap
We make a list for 55 people.
Donut Operator
And then we can win.
Fat Electrician
Your hangover is going to suck. Oh, yeah, so much.
Eli Double Tap
Oh, Mark's coming.
Brandon Herrera
He's coming.
Fat Electrician
Oh, yeah, I'm there.
Cody
You're formally invited to our Fourth of July party.
Donut Operator
55 formally accepting.
Cody
Oh, beautiful.
Donut Operator
I'll be there. Nick.
Eli Double Tap
We have him say where.
Fat Electrician
Nick, you're going to love this.
Cody
Remember the 55 gentlemen thing where we read off the bar tab of the founding Fathers? Yeah, we're doing that for the podcast on the 4th of July.
Brandon Herrera
I'm game.
Fat Electrician
We're inviting 55 friends and we have to finish how much they finished.
Brandon Herrera
I agree.
Cody
Including overthrowing a nation.
Brandon Herrera
We can overthrow.
Eli Double Tap
I already have a Canada.
Brandon Herrera
I'm ahead of the rest of you guys.
Cody
We overthrow the UK again just to fucking prove a point.
Eli Double Tap
Yeah.
Cody
Just in case you guys were feeling uppity.
Fat Electrician
Make you like this idea.
Brandon Herrera
I mean, they're not allowed to own butter dolls. What could they do?
Fat Electrician
No, I meant the drinking. A whole bunch. I like, I was like, nick's gonna naturally know I'm talking about the drinking, not the overthrowing. Europe.
Brandon Herrera
Again, it's the British. What are they gonna do?
Cody
Yeah, you know that meme? It's like that cartoon where the guy, like, forgets he's got a. Like a revolver in his carry on. And then he's like, huh? And then it's like, it cuts to hard cut. Like seven days later. He's like a king on a pile of gold in the UK with, like several slaves. Like, I think I own this island now.
Fat Electrician
This is mine, dude. I think on that note, Cody, you want to close us out?
Eli Double Tap
Guys, thank you for joining the unsubscribed podcast. I'm joined today by Eli Double Tap our friend Mark. Mark the coach tomorrow coach fat electrician Brandon Herrera, myself, donut operator. Thank you for joining us here at CPAC. We love you all.
Fat Electrician
Where can we find you, Mr. Mark?
Donut Operator
Yeah, I'm in Smith and Wesson now. I'm the director of the Academy. But I gotta build it first, so maybe next year.
Fat Electrician
Yo, hit us up.
Donut Operator
Oh, hell yeah. Yeah.
Brandon Herrera
He's already coming to Iowa. I've already told you. Texas, where we film fat pews.
Fat Electrician
Mark, he can do both.
Donut Operator
I might yell. I don't know.
Cody
This is going to be like a biblical tale. We cut Mark in half.
Brandon Herrera
We share him.
Fat Electrician
I call his acid dick.
Donut Operator
No, don't cut him that way.
Cody
Eli, thanks for watching.
Brandon Herrera
Jesus.
Eli Double Tap
Sa.
Unsubscribe Podcast Episode 204 - The Gang vs 1 Navy SEAL Operator ft. Mark Coch
Release Date: March 17, 2025
Host/Authors: Eli Doubletap, Brandon Herrera, Donut Operator, Fat Electrician
Guest: Mark Coch, Navy SEAL Operator
In this episode, the Unsubscribe Podcast team shares their wild and unexpected experiences attending CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference). The hosts recount their surreal journey as "legitimate media" amidst high-profile events and notable figures.
Brandon Herrera humorously reflects on his attire choices, wearing a tank top to both the Pentagon and the White House:
"I wore this tank top to the Pentagon and the White House." ([03:23])
The team discusses the amusing reactions they received, including confused looks and unexpected interactions with military officials. Fat Electrician highlights their unique brand presence:
"We're E4 Mafia. We're undefeated." ([05:36])
The hosts reveal a humorous yet impressive anecdote about obtaining official authorization to drink alcohol at the Pentagon, complete with a memorandum from the Secretary of Defense. Brandon Herrera proudly announces:
"We have the official memorandum stating that Unsubscribe Podcast is authorized to drink redacted amount of redacted cans of alcohol in redacted areas of the Pentagon." ([04:19])
This segment underscores their boldness and the unexpected perks of their CPAC adventure, blending professionalism with irreverent humor.
The highlight of the episode is the introduction of Mark Coch, a seasoned Navy SEAL with 25 years on the civil teams and eight years with a gold team on SEAL Team Six. The hosts welcome Mark warmly:
"25 years on the civil teams, 8 years with a gold team on team 6. A great person, wonderful human being." ([27:14])
Mark brings a wealth of military experience, setting the stage for deep and engaging discussions.
Mark delves into his extensive career as a Navy SEAL, sharing gripping tales from his deployments and operations. His stories provide listeners with a firsthand glimpse into the rigorous training and high-stakes missions that define Special Forces operations.
One of his most harrowing experiences involves a miscalculation during a fast rope descent:
"I stepped back and thought I was dead, but I wasn't." ([60:15])
Mark recounts narrowly escaping death, highlighting the unpredictable nature of combat situations and the mental fortitude required to survive them.
The conversation shifts to the intricacies of SEAL training, with Mark discussing the challenges and camaraderie that shape SEAL teams. He reflects on the physical and psychological demands of Hell Week and the bond formed through shared hardships.
Mark Coch shares:
"Joining the Navy was for the challenge. I didn't know what a SEAL was until I was one." ([46:40])
This admission underscores the transformative journey from civilian to elite special operations soldier, emphasizing the personal growth and resilience developed through military service.
Amidst the intense discussions, the hosts maintain a lighthearted atmosphere with playful banter and jokes. They reminisce about their unconventional attire at CPAC and the humorous exchanges with military personnel.
Donut Operator jokes about his inability to sell his exclusive squadron watch:
"The serial number on this one, it's attached to my name. So if this shows up on the black market somewhere, gray market Tudor will be like, what the hell?" ([38:35])
These moments of levity balance the episode, making the content both informative and entertaining.
As the episode progresses, the conversation delves into themes of leadership, teamwork, and the ethical dilemmas faced during missions. Mark shares his thoughts on decision-making under pressure and the importance of trust within a unit.
Mark Coch reflects:
"If they had just communicated, they could have avoided unnecessary conflicts." ([75:00])
This insight highlights the critical role of communication and strategic planning in successful operations.
The episode wraps up with the hosts expressing their gratitude to Mark for sharing his invaluable experiences. They discuss potential future collaborations and events, hinting at more exciting content to come.
Eli Doubletap concludes:
"Thank you for joining the Unsubscribe Podcast. We love you all." ([93:58])
The positive energy and camaraderie among the hosts and their guest leave listeners anticipating more engaging episodes.
Notable Quotes:
Episode 204 of the Unsubscribe Podcast offers a blend of high-energy storytelling, military insights, and comedic interactions. The inclusion of Mark Coch adds depth and authenticity, providing listeners with a compelling narrative of service and camaraderie. Whether you're a military enthusiast or simply seeking entertaining podcast content, this episode delivers on all fronts.