Angry Cops Saves JD Delay From Going Back To Jail | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 233

Summary

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Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 233 Summary

Title: Angry Cops Saves JD Delay From Going Back To Jail
Date: October 5, 2025
Hosts: Eli Doubletap, Brandon Herrera, Donut Operator & The Fat Electrician (JD Delay)
Main Guests: Rich (Angry Cops)

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Episode Overview

This episode delivers the signature mix of dark humor, wild anecdotes, inside law enforcement stories, and personal transformation. Special guest Rich (“Angry Cops”) joins the Unsubscribe crew, with much of the episode centering around prison, police work, criminal antics, and the surprising way a letter from Rich saved co-host JD Delay from going back to jail. The group also riff hilariously on fitness, community, content creation, criminal justice, and the sometimes gritty reality of reform and redemption.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Updates and Community Announcements

• Fitness Challenge and Community Love ([00:37])
  • JD gushes about the community's effort in the recent fitness challenge and the push to keep everyone motivated.
  • Announces updates on tour tickets (San Antonio, Orlando), new tactical footwear line, and celebrates his son’s creative project.
  • JD Delay: "I cannot stress how proud we are of each and every one of you that participated in this." [00:49]
• Texas & Community Vibe ([12:54])
  • The crew discusses how many content creators are moving to Texas and building a creative, supportive community.
  • Donut Operator: “I really dig it out here. Maybe get a spot out here in the future, because this is a cool state, man.” [13:53]

2. Career and Backgrounds: Law Enforcement Paths

• Rich’s Unlikely Path to Policing ([07:10])
  • Rich shares his origin—almost an English teacher, unexpectedly became a cop, fueled by camaraderie and the thrill of the job.
  • Rich: “I was an English education major... but then I got picked up by the Buffalo Police Department... I loved it.” [07:10]
• Storytelling Origins and Early YouTube ([10:46])
  • Eli and Rich chat about writing hundreds of articles for law enforcement sites as a gateway to their YouTube storytelling.
  • Eli: “I wrote for a company, defunct company called Blue Lives Matter, and I wrote a couple hundred articles for them...that’s what led up to, like, the breaking down police footage.” [10:46]

3. Gritty and Hilarious Law Enforcement Tales

• Police, Prison, and Community Building ([17:13], [59:30])

  • The hosts and guests muse on the differences between early YouTube, the boost of communal content, and how supporting each other is rare and valuable in their space.
  • They compare police work to “adult daycare” and share strategies of catching suspects and prison survival.
  • Eli: “Policing really is just like daycare. It’s adult daycare.” [62:13]
  • Donut Operator: “Bro. And imagine being a correctional officer because that really is adult daycare.” [62:32]

• Chase Stories & Prison Hide-And-Seek ([59:30])

  • War stories about searching homes, hiding behind doors, and the childish tricks criminals use to evade police.
  • Eli: “Dudes that hide behind doors...I broke a guy’s nose one time ‘cause I just pushed the door in as hard as I could.” [59:30]

4. Prison Realities, Hierarchies, & Rehabilitation

• How Prison Works/Should Work ([67:43])

  • Donut Operator and guests discuss real conditions in American prisons versus media hysteria, using “Alligator Alcatraz” as an example.
  • Debate the merits of rehabilitation/community control for nonviolent inmates, versus strict incarceration for those beyond reform.
  • Donut Operator: “I think what we need to do is start focusing more on rehabilitation... Let them spend that time doing something productive instead of being a drain.” [67:43]

• Consequences for Chomos & Prison Justice ([76:37] & [87:14])

  • Prison culture and the unwritten rules about inmates with certain charges (notably, crimes against children).
  • Details on how inmates and gangs police their own, creatively forcing out or isolating sex offenders, and sharing stories of “poetic justice.”
  • Donut Operator: “Chomos are never an issue for the cops unless a gang sends them on a mission because they’re not actual criminals.” [75:32]
  • Donut: “You are who you associate with is a reflection of you. So they should have had the moral aptitude and the spine to have those people removed from those positions.” [81:47]

• Dark Prison Humor & Redemption ([89:00]; [73:57]; [98:16])

  • Tales of “justice” inside prison, such as a baby-shaker’s fate and what happens to snitches.
  • Discussion of unsolicited prison pro tips ("wear three pairs of underwear when you turn yourself in" [52:24]), smuggling, and the notorious “dead bird up the ass” prank.

5. JD Delay’s Legal Saga & Redemption

• How Angry Cops’ Letter Saved JD ([49:57]-[57:16])

  • JD relays his struggle to clear up old charges—a 12-year-old DUI that nearly sent him back behind bars for up to a year.
  • He credits character references from friends and law enforcement—including a heartfelt letter by Rich (Angry Cops)—for convincing both prosecutor and judge to grant him community service instead.
  • JD Delay: “Out of all those letters, the letter he stops on, he’s like, I want to read a quote out of this letter... and this is coming from an SVU detective, which shows that this man has made serious life changes.” [53:21]
  • Rich: “You know how many people I put in jail? I could take one out.” [56:16]

• Reflections on Accountability and Change

  • JD speaks candidly about personal growth and making amends for his past.
  • JD Delay: “I do everything I can every day to like, bring good into the world to balance those scales. Maybe someday I’ll feel like I’ve made up for that. But I’m not there yet. I’m working on getting there.” [49:26]

6. Pop Culture, YouTube, and Music Tangents

• YouTube Crossovers: ([18:05], [21:38])

  • Stories about creators successfully transitioning to other platforms (Joji, Oliver Tree, Alex Terrible), fangirling, and the rise of musical/creative YouTubers.
  • Donut Operator: “I have like very little idea most of the people you’re talking about, but when we’re about musicians who came up off of YouTube... Alex. Terrible. Oh, yeah, yeah, Alex. Love Alex." [21:38]

• Workout Motivation Riffs: ([26:10])

  • Banter about what motivates tough gym sessions—positive affirmation or relentless bullying?
  • Rich: “The one thing I want you to say is, ‘Nobody cares that you’re tired.’... Don’t be like, ‘you can do it.’ I go, I hate that. It doesn't motivate me at all.” [26:31]

• Movie/TV References: ([112:05])

  • Extended riffing on “The Count of Monte Cristo,” “True Detective,” “The Outsider,” and prison movies as reflections of real and imagined suffering.
  • Eli: “Such an underrated movie that no one watches anymore.” [113:15]

7. Scandal, Jokes, and Raucous Riffs

• Name Dropping and Roasts: (everywhere)

  • Endless ribbing over who does the most name dropping, gags about political candidates, and elaborate jokes about buttholes, “soaking,” and more.
  • JD Delay: “Tony actually has a prolapsed anus that looks like a meat sock, bro. And that he can actually golf with it.” [121:18]

• On Cancel Culture and Edgy Humor: ([39:10])

  • Discussion of using “edgy” jokes in public (and how it backfires politically), defending friends who get unfairly attacked, and standing by the thick-skinned, gallows humor of veteran and police communities.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Donut Operator: "I said I was a career criminal. I didn't say I was a good one." [00:11], [47:47]
• Rich (Angry Cops): “You know how many people I put in jail? I could take one out.” [56:16]
• JD Delay: "Out of all of those letters...the letter he stops on, he's like, I want to read a quote out of this letter. And he starts reading Rich's letter and he's like, and this is coming from an SVU detective, which shows that this man has made serious life changes." [53:21]
• Donut Operator: "Bro. And imagine being a correctional officer because that really is adult daycare." [62:32]
• Eli Double Tap: "Policing really is just like daycare. It's adult daycare." [62:13]
• Rich (Angry Cops): "Fist fights are fun. People forget that they're kind of cool." [09:49]
• Donut Operator, re: prison justice: "He ended up landing at the prison that I was at...they refused him PC and announced that this is the baby shaker coming in...he ended up falling up a flight of cement stairs." [87:14]
• Rich, about songwriting and English: “If you can say the sky is purple, black, and green all at the same time... you just have to wax on poetically... and then you're right.” [05:28]

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Time-stamped Breakdown of Important Segments

• [00:37] Community & Fitness Challenge update, merch, and tour news
• [07:10] Rich’s backstory: war, English major, police career
• [10:46] From cop to content creator; how storytelling opened new doors
• [12:54] Content creator “exodus” to Texas; community support
• [26:10] Gym motivation: does tough love or positive affirmation work?
• [39:10] Political campaign attacks and the nature of edgy jokes
• [49:57 - 57:16] JD’s candid legal saga, redemption arc, and how Rich’s letter saved him
• [59:30] War stories: searching, chase tactics, "adult daycare" parallels
• [67:43] Prison realities vs. media myths; rehabilitation and re-entry talk
• [73:57; 87:14] How prisoners “police” their own, poetic justice in prison
• [112:05] The Count of Monte Cristo and pop culture on suffering and resilience
• [121:18] Hilarious roast: “Tony actually has a prolapsed anus that looks like a meat sock...”

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Final Thoughts & Tone

The tone is as punchy, irreverent, and darkly comedic as fans expect, mixing gallows humor, self-deprecation, and genuine insight. Beneath the crackling banter and crude running jokes, JD Delay’s story of change, and how a fellow officer’s faith in him made the difference, gives this episode a note of hard-earned hope and camaraderie.

Summary in a Sentence:
A raw, raucous episode where cops, criminals, and creators swap war stories and jokes, but also reveal surprising truths about justice, redemption, and the power of sticking up for one another—even when that means a cop helps a former criminal avoid jail and keep rebuilding his life.

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Transcript

[Donut Operator]

Don't look at me. Are you asking me to put out a hit Because I know people in Colorado prisons. What the. Can you say execution?

[Eli Double Tap]

Jesus Christ.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Dude, no wonder you kept getting caught.

[Donut Operator]

I said I was a career criminal. I didn't say I was good at it.

[JD Delay]

Say hi to Eli. He's racially ambiguous. And Brandon, his hair is fucking fabulous. Donut, a dog.

[Donut Operator]

Joke disposition. And there's a fat electrician. Welcome to Unsubscribe. What is up everyone?

[JD Delay]

I have so much to say. We got a couple updates. The fitness challenge, that's what everyone's here for first, right? For the next couple of weeks we are going to be getting all the numbers, checking everything and then starting a voting process for the hey, who is motivational and all that stuff. I cannot stress how proud we are of each and every one of you that participated in this. And if you didn't participate and you just helped and motivated people, fucking awesome. And I want to see this continue. Everyone just kicking ass, taking names, holding each other accountable and pushing through. Awesome job each and every one of you. Also, quick ticket update. San Antonio and Orlando are around the.

[Donut Operator]

Corner so make sure you snag those.

[JD Delay]

Up, come out, have a blast. We are really looking forward to meeting all of you and we can't wait to meet as many of you as we can. And something else to keep an eye open for. We have finally hit the point in the shoes foot apparel business that pretty much once you order the shoes are landing. Which shoes is that gonna be? The ones we've been promising you for a long time, the jump out side zips. And if you want detail, it is down to hey, the U goes down and cuts across specifically for that. And these zippers reinforced for that. Also the nice like felt interior so you don't feel it. And plus these are still about a month out but we have finalized it. That is the purpose of this message. The unsub side zip duty boot, reinforced heel, reinforced stitching, thick sole and we added leather all the way up to reinforce the laces. All of the new ones are coming with 550 cord and regular laces and we back that up with a lifetime warranty. Keep watching and looking out for the fitness updates. We promise you in the next couple weeks we will be releasing the winners and the information behind that. Go buy your tickets now. Come hang out everyone. Enjoy the episode. We love you. Keep kicking ass and taking names. Just a really quick insert, quick ride update. I'm so freaking proud. I know you all will love this. Ryden Just created his first video shot for shot with vfx of Terminator 2. He taught himself every aspect of that. It is his Raiden Quaves YouTube channel. Put a quick link somewhere here if you can go check it out.

[Donut Operator]

Go give it a quick watch. Give it some comments.

[JD Delay]

He was so stoked to upload this and show y'.

[Donut Operator]

All.

[JD Delay]

It's seeing these new emotions I've never seen him do. And it's all thanks to the support y' all been given. I. I am just so proud of my kiddo and what he is accomplishing. Ah, this is a proud dad moment. Holy moly.

[Donut Operator]

Hola, everybody.

[JD Delay]

Hola. Okay, everyone, ready for the countdown? 3, 2, 1.

[Eli Double Tap]

Hi, everyone.

[JD Delay]

Sorry.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Thunder rolls.

[Eli Double Tap]

Sorry, God.

[JD Delay]

He does not want this episode to happen.

[Donut Operator]

This episode is a crime against God. I know. Jesus doesn't want us to just thunder to.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

God loves you so much. He said, don't talk to the police.

[Donut Operator]

Even though after you're all done with this acab.

[Eli Double Tap]

I don't answer questions. I don't answer questions.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, my God.

[Eli Double Tap]

Okay, everyone, welcome to the unsubscribe podcast. I'm joined today by Eli Double Tap, Angry Cops. Rich, I missed you. By the way, J.D. delay, myself, donut operator. Thank you guys so much for being here.

[Donut Operator]

What's up?

[JD Delay]

We're back at it again. Everyone got a break.

[Donut Operator]

No, you didn't.

[JD Delay]

But you love this.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Like, we're rolling right into the second one. We're trying to stagger them. And then I'm super stoked for this one. Just because I have two men of the law and our boy JD I'm.

[Donut Operator]

Nestled in between law enforcement officers right now.

[Eli Double Tap]

What are we at? 58 felonies?

[Donut Operator]

Yes. Yes.

[Eli Double Tap]

Okay.

[Donut Operator]

Last time I was this close to two cops, I had a sore for weeks.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I thought the last time you were this close to cops, you had to call me up on the phone and ask me for a favor.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, that was wonderful. Thank you so much. I didn't know you were a poetic prolific writer.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I was an English major. I was gonna be an English teacher before I was a cop.

[Donut Operator]

Well, that explains it. Holy shit, man. Should we pray? We're gonna go back to that? What?

[JD Delay]

I think everyone in the audience was like, huh?

[Eli Double Tap]

Huh, Rich, is that why we get along so well?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

We're both men of literature?

[Eli Double Tap]

Like. Yeah, like writers.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Back in the day.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Wait, what? Did you go to college for writing, too?

[Eli Double Tap]

No, I just. I wrote, like, 500 law enforcement articles before I got into the YouTube thing. I know. Rich. Rich. You. You did that, too.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I didn't write like 500 articles, but I was an English education major and I had to write a lot.

[Eli Double Tap]

We're good at telling stories, buddy.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That's true. That's one of the reasons why I became an English major is because I got back home from Iraq and I didn't know what I was going to do. I was like, I know I got to go to college for something. And I was like, I'm not good at math, even though I enjoy it. I go, but I am really good at bullshitting, which is what English is. If you can. You can say the sky is purple, black, and green all at the same time. You just have to wax on poetically of why you feel that way. And then you're right. Math is, you know, one plus one equals two. English is. I say whatever it is and how I feel, and you can.

[Eli Double Tap]

Damn.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And knowing how to use a semicolon. People don't know how to use a semicolon.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, it's true.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That hard. They all think it's about.

[Eli Double Tap]

A semicolon is a super comma.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yes, it is A longer. It's just a longer pause.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Is that. Maybe we didn't know. This is how we get along so well. Maybe we. We kind of on the same vocation.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Like, we were both meant to be entertainers on the Internet, but we became cops first.

[JD Delay]

I didn't even know how to use a semicolon.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Don't know how to use your colon. Come on.

[Donut Operator]

You beat me to the colon joke.

[JD Delay]

I'm learning so much right now about my friends.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I'm good at beating felons to things. Hey.

[Donut Operator]

I'm a little too light skinned for all that, buddy.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, I don't know. They're getting pretty dark right there.

[Donut Operator]

There's some dark spots showing right in the blackout tattoo. I'm excited for this episode.

[JD Delay]

This is why. Well, that slight tangent they went on about English education. Yeah, I love it.

[Donut Operator]

What the fuck?

[JD Delay]

We'll just get that out of the way now. How many years of college did you do?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Three and a half. I only had. Yeah, I had one semester left and it was going to be my student teaching and I think one other easy course. And I got picked up by the Buffalo Police Department and they were like, hey, do you want to come in tomorrow and swear in? And I was like, sounds good. And that was. That was it. My buddy was a math teacher and then he became a Buffalo cop and was a Buffalo cop for years. And he was a jump out boy. And he was like, rich, you're gonna. You get back home, you should just try it out. If you don't like it, just go back to teaching. And I was like, okay. And then I loved it.

[JD Delay]

No.

[Donut Operator]

Nobody ever invites me to get paid to shoot minorities. What the.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You can do it for free.

[Eli Double Tap]

Wait, Rich, you got into policing because you're like, yeah, I guess I'll try it out.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

My buddy said I would have fun with it. And I was like, that sounds. It sounds like fun. Like, everybody's watched cops and saw foot chases. It was like, that sounds like cool.

[Eli Double Tap]

You know, that's why I got into policing.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Just because it sounded fun.

[Eli Double Tap]

I just needed a job, and, like, my grandpa did it, and so I got into policing.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, my buddy told me it would be fun. And I had another buddy that was in a small. So one of my friends was in Buffalo in the city, and my other buddy was in a town adjoining. And he was like, yeah, this is great. This is great. It's kind of fun. You should really enjoy it. It's like a mini deployment. Every day. You wear a vest, you get a gun, you get to go chase bad guys. You can get foot chases. You can. Car chases. It's great.

[Eli Double Tap]

That's weird. We're, like, really good friends now and have been for the past decade.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

We're men. We don't talk about deep shit unless we're forced to. Otherwise, it's all about, like, you know, wives, breasts, and butt sizes.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, this is true, bro. We've never talked about that before. I got into policing because it was, you know, just the thing to do at the time. I needed a job, so I didn't know that you were the. You're the same way. And also that you're kind of a writer. That's cool, man.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, no shit. You as a teacher, dear God, that have been a blast. And also could been a terrifying.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, I feel like it'd be a mix of those things. I feel like that's an appropriate, you know, amalgamation of, like, me being an instructor.

[JD Delay]

Mister.

[Donut Operator]

Hi. I.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

What? Raise your hand all the way. Stop being such a coward. Cuevas.

[JD Delay]

Poor kids.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yes. Why are you sitting next to the white women now? Over here.

[Donut Operator]

Oh.

[JD Delay]

No shit.

[Donut Operator]

Jessica's pregnant already. You breathed on her?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Go back to your roach infested friend's home.

[JD Delay]

Well, shit. And you never were like, hey, I'm gonna go back and finish this, though.

[Donut Operator]

No.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I got in a fist fight with a dude that was hammered, that stuck up, or that ran from a cab. And I Was just like, this is.

[Donut Operator]

The best job ever.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You know, fist fights are fun. People forget that they're kind of cool.

[JD Delay]

You went real. You started blowing out every.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So I'm blowing it out right now.

[JD Delay]

Wait, go talk.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I just started talking like this and it was.

[JD Delay]

Okay, so we're good now, J.D.

[Donut Operator]

Blah, blah, blah.

[JD Delay]

I got it. I was like, oh, we gotta fine tune that one really quick there.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Can you not do it midway?

[JD Delay]

No, because it's 32 bit float. So once it's like going.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

It is already over my head.

[JD Delay]

Thank you. Though it locks it in.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yep.

[JD Delay]

And you can't change it once it's recording. You have to stop it, readjust, then come back, do a quick clap. And now we're good.

[Donut Operator]

Ding. Mulligan, start over.

[JD Delay]

No, that's perfect.

[Donut Operator]

No, it's all. Everybody. Welcome to the Unsubscribe podcast. I'm Donut Operator.

[Eli Double Tap]

Pump the brakes.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, yeah, he's a very different J.D.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

And then we got.

[JD Delay]

Dude, Cody, I didn't know you wrote that many articles.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, I wrote several hundred articles before I started or I left policing and I wrote several hundred articles. And that's when I started getting into the whole police YouTube thing because I knew how to tell a story. I did that for a minute. I wrote for a company, defunct company called Blue Lives Matter, and I wrote a couple hundred articles for them. And that's. That's what led up to, like, the breaking down police footage.

[JD Delay]

No shit. Yeah, because I remember you doing your first one and that's when you were like, oh, this does way better than me playing Minecraft.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Way better than playing, like, CS Go or Minecraft or stuff like that. I just took what I. What I learned from policing, and I was a good storyteller. And that's how I started the whole Donut operator thing.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

What changed since then? Content's been garbage. No, I'm kidding.

[JD Delay]

We talked about this on the last one. It might be out of order. But the live shows, since you were saying maybe for the two, we asked Rich, Remember on Des Moines, we have the possibility of doing two shows.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, yeah. In one night.

[JD Delay]

Yes. And it was like, hey, we'll ask Cody. And we were talking about. Brandon was like. I was surprised. Cody said, let's sleep on it. Nick said the same. He's like, you know. He said yes.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. I. I don't think I let him finish. Oh, no. He was like, what do you think? And I just started laughing hysterically. I was like, what do you think it was of Course.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah. Richard's gonna go all day long on two shows in one night. I told him we know he's gonna do it.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

In between the shows, I'm just gonna hand out shots to people so they can catch up to our level. Yeah, we're just gonna go out there, be like, you need to catch up.

[Donut Operator]

Get drunk. Yep.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Here's a weed brownie or whatever nicotine you choose. Yeah, let's just start handing stuff out.

[Donut Operator]

Here's five zins. Put them in. Now we're going.

[JD Delay]

I got nicotine poisoning.

[Eli Double Tap]

Jd, how you been doing, man? You've been here for two nights in a row now.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, yeah, No, I love Texas, though. Yeah, I love Texas.

[Eli Double Tap]

It's a good spot.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, dude. Like, so, you know, I lived in Florida, and Florida is a great state. The weather is great. The politics are a little more conducive to how I like to live. There's constantly adventure. You might get killed by something at any given moment. Now I live a peaceful, boring life in Oregon. But, you know, I get to be with my parents, and they're not going to be here that much longer, so I'm stoked on that. But coming to Texas. Texas is stoked on being near your parents.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yes.

[JD Delay]

Stoked on being near your parents.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, yeah. Not stoked that they're not going to be here?

[Donut Operator]

No, no, no, no, no. Stoked on spending the rest of the remaining time with them and all of that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

But I was like, are you planning another felony?

[Donut Operator]

No, no.

[JD Delay]

Like, they're not gonna be here for long.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, I can guarantee.

[JD Delay]

JD's like, Damn.

[Donut Operator]

It sounded. That sounded bad. That sounded. Hold on, Hold. Mulligan Redo.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So I love my parents.

[Donut Operator]

Operator. But, yeah, no, I love Texas, man. I would like to move out here. I. I really dig it out here. Maybe get a spot out here in the future, because this is a cool state, man. And I keep. Like. I've barely been in public, but even just, like, walking through my. Every time I walk through the hotel, somebody's like, bro, it's you. So I feel like Texas has love for me, which is cool.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

We.

[JD Delay]

I mean, we have so many people that live here now. Nico just moved down.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Did he?

[JD Delay]

Yeah, Nico lives here now. He's, like, 20 minutes from here.

[Eli Double Tap]

Nico Ortiz?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yep.

[Donut Operator]

No.

[Eli Double Tap]

Well, that's rad. We got Tectone.

[JD Delay]

Tectone. Oh, yeah, he's moving down.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Really?

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, we got. We got a whole group of boys moving there now.

[Donut Operator]

I could. I could get arrested for stalking asthma Gold.

[Eli Double Tap]

I feel like Aspahn Yeah, nah, he's still in Austin.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, so.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Still an hour away though.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah. Well, it. It's really cool because it's like you build a good community. Community, community, community. You build a good group of boys and suddenly people want to hang around you and just make themselves better people too.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, it's like it's their destiny.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, God. Sonpiker.

[JD Delay]

I like he drank from that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That's all I gotta say about our future plans. I don't know. Everybody else got so excited.

[JD Delay]

Cody, do you want better sex?

[Eli Double Tap]

I love better sex.

[Donut Operator]

Do you want to start having better sex immediately?

[Eli Double Tap]

Can our new sponsor, Adam and Eve.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Help us with that?

[JD Delay]

That's right.

[Donut Operator]

Dump your girlfriend's.

[JD Delay]

You want better sex?

[Donut Operator]

Start over.

[Eli Double Tap]

Who needs a real person? The best way to get started is head ON over to AdamAndEve.com right now.

[Donut Operator]

This website is so great.

[JD Delay]

Adam and eve is offering 50% off just about any item.

[Donut Operator]

Cody, look what I got for 50% off.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Whoa.

[Donut Operator]

Wanna them?

[Eli Double Tap]

Just like all Adam and Eve orders. Does it include free shipping and rush processing?

[JD Delay]

Cody, can I see you with these tits on?

[Eli Double Tap]

Don't want your neighbors to see that you're getting the gift. Apeinator 10,000. They offer discreet shipping.

[Donut Operator]

My tits are lopsided.

[Eli Double Tap]

They're a little. A little wonky, buddy.

[Donut Operator]

Go.

[JD Delay]

Did you see this toy I ordered? It's called the green Goblin.

[Eli Double Tap]

Was it sent discreetly for free and fast?

[JD Delay]

It was. And then my neighbors judged me because I opened it on the front lawn. Cody, don't Wait. Better sex is just a click away.

[Donut Operator]

Lick me, daddy.

[Eli Double Tap]

So how do we get 50% off that one item with free shipping and rush processing?

[JD Delay]

Just head over to AdamAndEve.com, pick out a single toy or anything you desire and then just enter code unsub at checkout.

[Donut Operator]

Code unsub.

[Eli Double Tap]

Unsub.

[JD Delay]

Dude, why is that so weird?

[Eli Double Tap]

Like, when you say it doesn't sound right?

[Donut Operator]

No. Yes, that's. That's right.

[JD Delay]

Unsub. That's UN S U B. [e-mail] this is a specific offer for.

[Eli Double Tap]

This podcast, so be sure to use the code unsubscribe to get your discount.

[Donut Operator]

To get your discount, spice up the.

[JD Delay]

Bedroom by bringing more pleasure and satisfaction to it. Wish I could satisfy my partner.

[Eli Double Tap]

I'm sorry, can you teach me? Adam and Eve can.

[JD Delay]

Cody. Me. I love that everyone does move here because it is. We don't protect any secrets. We try to help each other as much as possible in every aspect of the business or social media. Hey, have you tried this. Hey, you should do this instead. Hey, can you collab? Hey, do you want to be on this video? Everyone just lifts each other up, which is extremely rare in the business world and then the content world. A lot of people are like, nope, fuck off. This is mine. You're not learning any of this shit.

[Eli Double Tap]

Well, that's how like early YouTube was as well. I talk about this on my stream sometimes. Like early YouTube, they would say, I don't want to collab with you because you're going to steal my audience. Like you're gonna take my fans from me if you're doing content with me. And we just, we just try to push each other up.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Here in the. Our little group that we have here.

[JD Delay]

Me, Canyon. I didn't know he was a Freddie Wong. He used to watch Freddie back in the day.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So we were.

[Eli Double Tap]

Hunter did.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, dude. Hunter loves Freddy. So we were talking, we were watching his video last night and he brought up Freddy. I was like, text Hunter. I was like, wait, do you like Freddy Wong? He's like, oh man, he's a goat. I was like, oh, you know him? He's like, no. Like, do you want to meet him? He. Freddy actually loves going to Vegas. Actually we should all go to Vegas together. Cuz those two would have a. Oh yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Hunter gambling.

[JD Delay]

Yeah. With Freddy, gambling.

[Donut Operator]

Isn'T funny.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Like a really good gambler.

[JD Delay]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I know Hunter and Hunter makes his voices and I would just love to be there. I just want to sit on the blackjack table of them and just be like, pump up the fucking lady that's dealing. While Hunter tears her down and does his voices. And then Freddy's just like sitting there card counting.

[Donut Operator]

Carolyn, you're killing me. Come on.

[Eli Double Tap]

When he's yelling at the V. Jesus Christ, dude. Because me and. Me and Brandon went up there a couple weeks ago to Vegas to put the range day stuff together. And we didn't know Hunter was in town. And Hunter just happened to be at the hotel that we were staying at. So Hunter comes down on the floor. He's doing that. He's at the blackjack t. Like, come on, come on. Just like yelling at the. At the blackjack dealers and stuff. He's. He's the best person to gamble with. It's amazing.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's just fun to be around.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah. He's such a cool dude.

[JD Delay]

Hyper talented. Hyper talented.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

People are just finding out that Hunter Papa Me is meat Canyon. Zav was telling me there was a whole trend of people. Some girl went viral. She's like, oh, My God. I was today years old learning that Papa Meat and Meat Canyon are the same person.

[Donut Operator]

I just found that out right now. When you said it with your mouth, that's when I found that out. Holy. Okay, that makes so much sense.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

No wonder you kept getting caught.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, right. I said it was a career criminal. I didn't say it was a good one.

[Eli Double Tap]

That seriously makes me think of the Joji thing. It's like. Wait, Joji and Pink Guy are the same person? Yeah, they've always been the same person.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Does he come out with a new album anytime?

[Eli Double Tap]

I don't know.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He had that one where he was like, running on the train. The music video where he was like, running on the train going through.

[Eli Double Tap]

I haven't seen that one.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

It was for one of his more recent songs. That's probably like eight years old now, but he had a really good album. His last album. I think it was his last album.

[JD Delay]

That was one I did not know. Like, I think you told me Joji and the Pink Guy were the same person.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, dude. He's a YouTube OG and he's one.

[JD Delay]

Of the few that transition transitioned into actual. A successful career in music, like, fully. Yeah, he's crushing the music scene. Or did. I don't know if he still does.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He has to. Yeah. I mean, I would still go to his shows. He's phenomenal. Who's the guy that does the song like, Please Don't Bring Me Down Banana. I forget his name. He used to have the bowl cut and be in like the night.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oliver Tree.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oliver Tree went to one of his shows. Awesome.

[Eli Double Tap]

You went to the Oliver Tree show?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, he was in Pittsburgh last year.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, that's a dude I would love to go see.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Great. It was cool as. Great concert. Nice.

[Eli Double Tap]

Man. He came out of nowhere too, because he. He was kind of with that LA crowd, like. Like the Joji scene. So that's. That's really cool that he blew up.

[Donut Operator]

You guys know all the OG YouTube blur, which is cool because I accidentally fell into YouTube and so, like, I have like very little idea most of the people you're talking about, but when we' about musicians who came up off of YouTube. Alex. Terrible. Oh, yeah, yeah, Alex. Love Alex.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He came off of YouTube.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, he was a YouTuber first.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Really?

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Did. Didn't he start out talking about slaughter to prevail? Alex? Yeah, he just started out doing covers, Vocal covers on YouTube before.

[Eli Double Tap]

I'm friends with him too.

[Donut Operator]

Are you?

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, dude. He sends me his masks.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, we have.

[Donut Operator]

Sick. Dude, I love him. Man, he's cool. I actually literally had a fangirl moment when he followed me back on. On Insta. I was like. Like, my wife was like, you're acting like a little girl. And I'm like, I know. Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

All of his masks are in the background on my YouTube videos.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, I've seen those. I. I love that dude.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, that's cool.

[Donut Operator]

That dude lore maxes. I feel like he's just on every side quest, bro. Like the bare knuckle boxing, wrestling, boxing.

[JD Delay]

That damage. Oh, my God.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

The last fight he got into.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, man.

[Eli Double Tap]

Where his nose was pressed in.

[Donut Operator]

He such a g about it though.

[Eli Double Tap]

So if you. If you guys don't know who Alex the Terrible is, he. He's the lead singer of Slaughter to Prevail. And he's just. He's a gnarly dude and he does side quests. Like Eli was saying he does bare knuckle boxing now. And God, that last fight he got in was gnarly, man.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, dude, he broke his orbital.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

His.

[JD Delay]

What all did he crack? I mean, God, that boy swole.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Look at those lumps.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, he had like brain swelling, like all sorts of nasty going, but just.

[Donut Operator]

Immediately hugged the dude that he just got whomped by. You know what I'm saying?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You can't think good.

[JD Delay]

And then he fights bears. He does, yeah.

[Donut Operator]

Every, like, wrestles full grown ass bears, bro. He's raising right now. He's. He's like rehabilitating and raising baby bears right now. Dog.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

What breed of bear?

[Donut Operator]

Russian.

[JD Delay]

Russian bear.

[Eli Double Tap]

Giant, Serbian. Like bears. Like, they're nasty as.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. And they're like just like chewing on his nose. And in his Insta videos as they purr and he's just laughing.

[Eli Double Tap]

No, he's cool as like, I, I hit him up a couple years ago and I was like, hey, man, I really like, I like your music. Like, I listen to it in the gym because it's like, whoa, you know? Yeah, exactly why you probably wear it, you gnarly. But he hit me back and he was like, hey, can I send you some of my masks? And I was like, yeah, dude, just that. That would be amazing. And he's. He's a. He's just a really cool guy.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Super humble, super chill. Like, his mask. Do you hear what happened to his mask factory?

[Eli Double Tap]

No, so, like, mask factory.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, so he has a. He. He has this business where he makes these masks, the Slaughter to Prevail masks. And it's out there in Russia and in like, like a Little village. And. And the roof caved in and collapsed one of the walls. So his whole production for his mask company. Yeah. Is just trash right now. So he was like. He had so many people supporting him by ordering masks, and he had to come out and go, hey, I turned off the orders. I'm sorry. I love you guys. Thank you for supporting me, but I. I don't want to, like, have this be a thing where I can't get them to you in a timely fashion. Thank you for the support and everything, because he's just that dude, man.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, he seems. He seems like a awesome guy. And also, he loves Berserk. He sent me one of his Berserk masks that I still need to give you.

[Donut Operator]

No, you gave it to me.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, I gave you the Berserk mask, I think.

[JD Delay]

I think so. It's the black. Black one.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yep. Yep.

[JD Delay]

100. Yeah. I appreciate that.

[Donut Operator]

I love the new album, too. He's got that song Lift that. Do not be a. And you're just. Do not be.

[Eli Double Tap]

Like I said, that's my gym.

[Donut Operator]

That's the gym, bro. You know what I'm saying? That's his gym, too.

[Eli Double Tap]

If I don't deadlift this, I'm gay.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

I'm listening to him just blare in the background. Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I listen to EDM when I work out. Like, I like to dance in between lifts.

[Donut Operator]

I can. I've got the mental image of that. It moved a little bit to the left when you said that. Just saying.

[JD Delay]

I'm all about his motivational speeches the entire time I lived, like, yeah. Some interstellar soundtrack with just people telling me I'm a piece of and I need to do better. I'm like, oh, yeah, I am.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I was. So roll your eyes. I did CrossFit for a while, and I liked it. Right. It was a good time, but it was, like, a really positive atmosphere. And so the coach is there when you're like, like, doing, like, the annual competitions and stuff like that. They're, like, motivating you. And because it's, you know, a positive community, they're like, come on, Rich.

[Donut Operator]

One more. You can do it.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And I told my one coach, Lindsay, who's a gangster, I was like, lindsay, don't ever give me positive affirmations when I'm lifting. I go, the one thing I want you to say is, nobody cares that you're tired. Tell me that. Tell me nobody cares that you're tired. Tell me. Don't be a. Don't be a. I go say stuff like that just. Nobody cares to say. Nobody cares that you're tired.

[JD Delay]

Everyone else is finished.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, everybody. Everybody else is gonna beat you. You're better than this. Stop. Stop. Have ass. I go, don't. Don't be like, you can do it. I go, I hate that. It doesn't motivate me at all. It makes me feel like what I'm doing is enough, and that's not it. Tell me that I suck. You know, Be like, you do better, you know, Then I'll. We're good. She's like, I'll try.

[Donut Operator]

So you're ugly. What the. I need my muscles to look good. When I got out of prison, one of the first jobs that I got was being a personal trainer at Gold's Gym, right? And I was training people that wanted to do bodybuilding competitions. One of the people was. It was a couple, and they were doing the 50 and over, right? And they were super nice people. But the. The. The lady needed positive affirmation. And I, for some reason, just decided that wasn't going to work for the dude. So I rode this dude so hard, bro. I wrote him like it was a diddy party hard. I'd be like, standing over him going, this is why your wife doesn't look at you anymore. Lift that. What the is wrong? You're pathetic. You're not a man. But he do it, bro. And they shorts got shorter. They both took the comp, bro. They both ended up with Gold for the over 50 no category. And I was so proud of them both. They were badass for that.

[JD Delay]

A lot of the times, all it takes is that. Just call them a piece of or tell them to. They're not doing it. I had one client, he would not listen. And he came in, he was overweight by 2 pounds of where he was supposed to be or no, 4 pounds. And I remember he got off the score. He's like, oh, you know what? That stuff happens. I was like, like, I'm going to fire you as my client. I'm letting you know that I'm not going to have you walk around and say, who trained you? Oh, Eli trained you. It's like, off. This is going to be the last three sessions once this runs out, unless you make changes. No, I'm not joking. I was like, you take. You just off. You don't follow any of the meal plans. You do jack and barely push yourself in here. So after this, we'll just knock out the sessions. We'll get through it. That dude next, like, two gym sessions wouldn't talk to me, you'd just be like, feelings were hurt. Month later, he's down 20 pounds. I was like, holy. He's like, that pissed me off. Thank you. But holy pissed me.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

The spike is a hell of a motivator.

[Donut Operator]

It is so cool to get paid to talk bad to people. Like, if I could do that, it's like, I think I feel like it's like either a personal trainer or you're a drill instructor. Those are the two occupations where you could just get paid to just thoroughly degrade and debase people, like, on the most savage level. And it's totally acceptable anywhere else. You're like a bully.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. I just call giving them their daily dose of reality. I don't see why you have to put such a negative spin on it.

[Donut Operator]

Okay, so. But what is the end result when you bully people? You make them better or they kill themselves.

[Eli Double Tap]

Then they're.

[JD Delay]

Then they are a. Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Then you're just standing over his dead body.

[Donut Operator]

I told you your feelings. He just like, resuscitate him so he comes back.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Get up.

[Donut Operator]

Repeat.

[JD Delay]

Look, you fell at that. Also, you can't even die right.

[Donut Operator]

Get up.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, that's a heavy part that I take into my working out too, where I'm like, my family's gonna die if I don't lift this right now.

[JD Delay]

I have to go harder.

[Eli Double Tap]

That came from, like, being in the military and like doing the police ST stuff. It's like you're a fucking. If you don't do this right now. Which I'm happy that happened. I didn't fucking myself.

[JD Delay]

Oh, hi. I didn't see you there while you're here. Hey, look at this. Harry's razors. Most razors suck. Either you get razor burn no matter how you shave and. Or it's $3 when you first buy it, and then it's $80 for each additional blade you buy. You know what you're doing. Razor companies, that's where Harry's comes in. Because they at half the price than their premium competitors. Also, it has the fine German engineering. This is the worst German accent one has ever heard. During manufacturing, they measure the blades by microns. That means it reduces the itch or the razor burn. Also, the travel pack is really nice because that is genius German engineering. Gas and you get a nice foamy shave. Gel has aloe in it if you have sensitive skin. And Harry's doesn't make just razors. They make a plethora of men's grooming products. Oh, yeah, I used a big word for A limited time, our listeners get a Harry's trial set for $8 plus a free gift. Just head over to Harry's.com unsub to.

[Donut Operator]

Receive our exclusive discount.

[JD Delay]

And after your purchase, they're gonna ask you how you heard about him. Tell them the uncivil army showed up.

[Donut Operator]

So get that nice clean cut today.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I got to do the drill sergeant stuff in a week. And so I'm running because I don't run a lot. You know, I'll do some sprints. You know, it's. Running's not my bag. I like lifting heavy things. So I know I'm gonna have to train privates to. And we're gonna do PT and I'm gonna run with them. It is what it is. So I've been running more and more, especially this month.

[Donut Operator]

Month.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And I just write notes to myself on the fridge. And it's like, it's literally, don't be fat. Don't be a shitty drill sergeant. And then my wife will be like, why are you writing that on the wall? Like, why do you keep. Why you keep, like, focusing on like, I gotta go to the gym today, I gotta go to the gym tomorrow. I gotta run tomorrow. I'm like, because you don't. Nobody respects a fat drill sergeant. Nobody's gonna be like, oh, I'm afraid of that guy is like, you know, when I'm running one mile. I will say this, though. I have like dry heaved while I've run with privates and. And like spit up a little bit and I'm like, whoa. Because then you get like that natural high because all of your endorsements just went flushing as you, as you vomited. Like, I've done that before. And I motivated some troops where they're like seeing me like. And then I just keep going and.

[JD Delay]

They'Re like, he is a God.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He kept going even though he vomited and he's still screaming.

[JD Delay]

He didn't stop any of it either.

[Donut Operator]

I don't know how do I.

[Eli Double Tap]

Did you look them in the face and vomit while you're looking at them?

[Donut Operator]

Don't look at me. Don't look at me as I'm staring through them. Like, I can't look away through.

[Eli Double Tap]

He's a monster. What?

[Donut Operator]

The fluids come out. I feel like, can we run like political campaigns? Like a drill sergeant or a personal trainer just thoroughly berating the other person and degrading, just beating, bullying the ever loving dog out of him. Like, tony, could we do it?

[Eli Double Tap]

Have you met Brandon Herrera?

[Donut Operator]

You know what? I'm so Proud of him for jumping back in, bro. It is about time a YouTuber ended up in an actual position of power. And there's no one I would want to see besides him because we've had someone else attempt before, and I'm. I mean, multiple times. Like, she just got a train ran on her with her failures, you might know her.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, Laura Loomer.

[Donut Operator]

Laura Loomer.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, that's right.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. She's very bad at her job and life in general. Yeah, she's bad at being a person. She doesn't look like one.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

She made fun of a Medal of Honor recipient. I don't know if you knew that. She talked about a Medal of Honor recipient on the Internet. I did not enjoy that.

[Donut Operator]

Is she. Has she served our country?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I think she serviced a lot of men that run our country.

[Donut Operator]

You know, it's funny, with her mouth, I actually saw. I was looking through 100 Biden's laptop and I saw pictures her actually pegging Tony Gonzalez in a gay bathhouse, I believe.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Did you know that Tony Gonzalez moans when he wipes? At least he. People have said this. And he won't. He won't address the allegations.

[Donut Operator]

I've heard that as well. So, I mean, I, like, I haven't actually witnessed it, but, you know, when multiple people are saying something, it does grant clearance.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

There's a trick. There is a ring of truth in it.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, I mean, there's an oring of.

[Eli Double Tap]

Truth pouring the wrong way.

[JD Delay]

Way, the long way with his butt.

[Donut Operator]

He eats bananas for the shape, not the taste.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. Dude, did you know that Tony likes to have hot dog tasting competitions? And he judges them all on mouthfeel.

[Donut Operator]

For those of you at home, we're insinuating that he's a homosexual.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yes. He loves the Simpsons.

[Eli Double Tap]

He snicker bars upside down just for the veiny.

[JD Delay]

Oh, I hate that way more.

[Donut Operator]

I just like the texture.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, this is so much better than a choco taco. Get it? Because a taco is like a vagina.

[Donut Operator]

Okay, that was good.

[JD Delay]

I just picture him opening the Snickers turning upside down, but, oh, the veiny.

[Eli Double Tap]

Good side, the good side.

[Donut Operator]

That's the good side.

[JD Delay]

Why are you licking? It's not ice cream.

[Donut Operator]

Go back in your bedroom, son.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Don't look at daddy when he eats his delicious treats.

[Eli Double Tap]

I'm just. I'm curious what he's gonna use against Brandon the next time I don't. Because he tried that veterans shit, which was fucking hysterical because you. You and I and Brandon had just left a panel.

[Donut Operator]

Yes.

[Eli Double Tap]

Where we were like. We were talking to people. How. Like to talk to your buddies and how to not.

[JD Delay]

Yes, yeah, Prevention panel. And then, hey, this is how we talk. Or this is, as Cody says, it's reaching out. Call your homies, have those conversations.

[Donut Operator]

But.

[JD Delay]

And then immediately Brandon had that joke because he opened for it and he didn't say the joke. And I told him, hey, you should tell the joke to the podcast, though, because I found it fucking hilarious. And then that one clip is because it was.

[Eli Double Tap]

We were sitting there and I talked about it last night. It was at Shot show.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yep.

[Eli Double Tap]

Right. And Meat Canyon was with us on that podcast.

[JD Delay]

Yep.

[Eli Double Tap]

And everyone, like, we all told Brandon was like, maybe don't say that during this panel. Because he said. It was like, when I. I am an honorary veteran, because sometimes I think about putting a gun in my mouth, too.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, it was like, I think it's tasteful.

[Eli Double Tap]

So we. So we said, like, yeah, may, like, maybe not say that one. But he. He just recited it to us while we were doing the podcast later that day. And that's what Tony took and, like, ran it on ads all over. All over San Antonio.

[JD Delay]

And you have all the veterans laughing in that.

[Eli Double Tap]

We were laughing our asses off at that one because, like, Zach was there, like, he's a combat veteran. You're a combat veteran.

[JD Delay]

Like, Rich, you were on that one. Were you there on that one?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I don't know.

[Eli Double Tap]

He wasn't there for that one. It was like, me Canyon, and it was you and me, and we had Zach Bell, like, veteran with a sign there.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

So everyone thought it was a hilarious joke, but we were joking. Like, you. You, like, good job not telling that one, but me and Brandon were sitting at the Texas Roadhouse here, and we, like, looked up at the tv, and it was Brandon telling that joke, and it was like, Tony Gonzalez says that Brandon hates veterans.

[Donut Operator]

The dude who spends all his time.

[Eli Double Tap]

I was on that podcast.

[Donut Operator]

What the. The dude who gets relentlessly bullied by all of his veteran friends. And. And we literally, you guys, stick purple hearts up his ass when he's not looking. Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

It's like, guys hates him.

[Donut Operator]

He can't stand them.

[Eli Double Tap]

Eli, we raise hundreds of thousands of dollars a year to help the veteran community. But you know what? You know, Brandon hates veterans. It's whatever.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You're putting money in their pockets, so then they do more heroin bastards. You should just let him die in the streets like the savages they are.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, I wonder what.

[JD Delay]

It'll be interesting to see what approach he Takes this time because I know he hated it last time, so I wonder if he even tries the. Going on the offensive. He's like, brandon's cool. I would probably start that route if I were him. Brandon, like, you guys lay hate and.

[Donut Operator]

Like, you know what?

[JD Delay]

Brandon's a good guy. I hope the best for him. This run.

[Donut Operator]

Don't give him touch.

[JD Delay]

All I would do, I'd be like, please don't. Don't kill me right now.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And instead he decided. He chose. He chose to post the word retard.

[Donut Operator]

Like.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Like he's so edgy. It's like when you're. It's like when, like the Mormon kid swears in front of you, you're like, michael, that's not one of your words. Stop trying to pretend like you're cool.

[Eli Double Tap]

Your first time cursing.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, I sent you that video. I don't. I don't think I sent. Rich. You remember that video?

[Donut Operator]

Is it the Mormons that do soaking, or is that the Jehovah's Witnesses?

[Eli Double Tap]

That's the Mormons do soaking.

[Donut Operator]

Okay, that's. That's weird. Yeah, that's weird.

[Eli Double Tap]

Do you guys know what soaking is?

[Donut Operator]

Let's talk about it.

[Eli Double Tap]

Okay, so I've spent a lot of time in Salt Lake City for obvious reasons. Eli, you have as well.

[JD Delay]

Yes. Yes, I have.

[Eli Double Tap]

Soaking is when you put yourself inside of a woman, and then you're. It just stays there.

[Donut Operator]

There.

[Eli Double Tap]

It's just there. Right. That's the thing.

[Donut Operator]

Because it's the movement that God can see, but if you're not, God can't see it.

[JD Delay]

God is a T. Rex, omnipotent God. It's like, I found a way around his vision.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, that's what I love.

[Donut Operator]

But you can actually have a friend, your friend, stomp on the bed. It's kind of like the shoe pun, but it's like the. The vanilla version of the shoe pump.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

When you're. So pump is right.

[Eli Double Tap]

When you're soaking, a friend can shake the bed. Right, Right?

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Yeah. So the shoe pump is. Is when you are inside a woman and your buddy stomps on your ass to give you more motion. So it's kind of like that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

But, you know, I enjoyed both of your description. But when Eli made a face, he's just like, oh, you're just going to cheat on omnipotent God? And he's like this and, like, pretending that he was God with his eyes closed. Like, God can't see that. I immediately thought that you were going to do, like, an Asian God. Voice like.

[JD Delay]

Oh, it got me this time.

[Donut Operator]

O. Hey, angel, where you at? Hey. Hey, Adam.

[JD Delay]

E. It's not Adam and Stevie.

[Donut Operator]

I know.

[JD Delay]

Sinners. Am I right?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Okay.

[Donut Operator]

I knew I should have died.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

This is why I hold back MSG for so long.

[Donut Operator]

No, when you do it, it's racist.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I know. His name's high. I can say that.

[Donut Operator]

Okay, people. Okay. Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Why the bed shaking? I can't see this.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, no. How come my sons and daughters are.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Coming at the same time time. Even though they're not humping one another?

[Donut Operator]

Oh, well, I guess better forget give it next time. An Asian God.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Not at all. Very stereotypical.

[JD Delay]

Adam, what's up?

[Donut Operator]

Okay.

[JD Delay]

You happy? I need a woman or a partner. Oh, my God. Okay, give me a rib. Okay. There you go. And boom. Have fun with it. You so needy.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Oh, you're so needy.

[Donut Operator]

Don't trust a woman.

[JD Delay]

I sent a snake. She fell for that. No one fall for the snake trick.

[Donut Operator]

Adam, we need another rib.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I want to make short ribs. They so good.

[Donut Operator]

Asian Adam, you ever have your own short rib?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Come here.

[JD Delay]

He took two. He just. I need two ribs. He just used one, and he tasted the other.

[Donut Operator]

He's like, oh, that's delicious.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Okay.

[Donut Operator]

Gonna send that down. Okay. What?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's like.

[Donut Operator]

Agent God takes one rib from Adam.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's like, okay, I make the woman. Oh, I need one more to even it out.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, so good. Oh, Adam.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Short ribs. So delicious.

[JD Delay]

That's how Korean barbecue came around. Yeah. Do you ever struggle with tiny toiletry bottles?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

No.

[JD Delay]

Well, with Mando, Struggle no more. I would not want to spread whole body deodorant on you, Nick.

[Donut Operator]

It's gonna get all clumpy on my.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Chest hair.

[Donut Operator]

But look like I've been.

[JD Delay]

Rolling around in mashed potatoes.

[Eli Double Tap]

How well does it lubricate?

[Donut Operator]

It's developed by a doctor, and it works for 72 hours. Show some respect.

[Eli Double Tap]

I'm gonna tell that to everyone at the Magic the Gathering tournament.

[Donut Operator]

I wish I was there when they figured out that it wasn't good for 73 hours. I like to imagine just a fat guy on a treadmill for 72 hours straight. Zach up. He. He's turned. Time to shower. Finally, fatty Curdled, thanks to Mando.

[Eli Double Tap]

It's also named after Mount Fuji.

[Donut Operator]

Really? Mine's bourbon and leather because I'm a man doe. Couldn't even get through an ad without a pun.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

What?

[Donut Operator]

Do you want to sell the deodorant or not? Brandon? I'm just waiting for the sweet release of death. Not going to Come for at least 72 hours.

[JD Delay]

Listen, we did a lot of meet.

[Donut Operator]

And greets during the live tour.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Y' all motherfuckers could use some mando.

[Donut Operator]

A strong, independent woman. You can do everything a man can do. He can still use some mando.

[JD Delay]

Archa Nick dead.

[Eli Double Tap]

The cops are coming.

[Donut Operator]

We've got 72 hours to hide the body before it starts to smell.

[Eli Double Tap]

Actually does smell pretty damn good.

[JD Delay]

This one smells like the body wash. Smells actually really good.

[Eli Double Tap]

I have bourbon leather.

[Donut Operator]

Did anybody find the body? No, but that ditch over there smells delicious. There's no way there's a body over there.

[Eli Double Tap]

You said we can ad lib jokes on you.

[Donut Operator]

We're into that.

[Eli Double Tap]

This isn't your average deodorant or antiperspirant.

[Donut Operator]

You can try Mando starter pack. It's perfect. It comes with absolutely everything. Stick deodorant cream, deodorant. Two free products of your choice, like a mini body wash or deodorant wipes and free shipping as a special offer. You'll get 20 off site wide with our exclusive code on site sub.

[JD Delay]

That's code unsub [e-mail].

[Donut Operator]

So the Mormons have soaking and Christians use the. The back passage because God can't see anal. So anal's not a sin. And the Catholics just do choir boys, right? Is that how that works?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

No, it was. The thing was, young Christian girls would save. They would. They wouldn't lose their virginity. So they do it in the back door.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

It also is if. Because it wouldn't get them pregnant.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's true.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So it was like they would still have like their vaginal virginity and they wouldn't be able to get pregnant. So there was like a time like when I was growing up when that was like the thing I heard.

[Donut Operator]

Choir boys don't get pregnant either. For the Catholics out there, that depends.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

On which, you know, church you go to. It's evangelical. You got a little, you know, a lot of transitioning.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Oh, God, yeah. Yeah. It's a new world today.

[JD Delay]

Like, okay, since we have you boys on the podcast.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I know did the story. Story how I got him out of prison.

[JD Delay]

Yes.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, Yeah. I want to hear that story.

[Donut Operator]

Well, yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

Okay. So you guys, I had a 12 year old DUI charge.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, God. That was. I thought that was going somewhere else.

[Donut Operator]

What.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

What did I sign a letter for?

[Donut Operator]

Rich's mind quickly slips into failure.

[Eli Double Tap]

Like, 12 year old. I'm over here. Like, what the.

[Donut Operator]

So I. I have discharged. It was. It was literally from the end of 2013, I got a DUI for marijuana. And then I, I, shortly after that, I was facing a lot of bigger charges in the state of Oregon. They wanted like 10 years in prison. And I was like, I don't want to do that. I'm just gonna go to Florida and evade prosecution. It seemed like a great idea at the time. I was there for 10 years. I recently moved back to Oregon after I was able to get all my resolved in Florida, and Oregon stopped prosecuting uumvs, which is what I was, I was facing. It's un. Unauthorized use of a motor vehicle so you could steal cars in Oregon. They don't care, by the way, just so you know, they're not going to prosecute you. So I, I put in a motion from Florida to have my charges dropped so I could move back to Oregon. And the prosecutor that put me in prison when I went in 2009 was the judge who signed off on, yeah, cool, we'll drop all these charges. So, so thank you, Deborah. Vo. Appreciate you, your honor. And so I was able to move back, but I still had this warrant because I had probation for a DUI that I never finished. And, and in fact I like immediately up, like I immediately violated. I was crusty back then. It was a bad deal. I was not acting like an adult, not handling my responsibilities. And nowadays I like to handle my responsibilities as head on as humanly possible. So I, I knew that I had to clear this up and so I, I went and I got a lawyer and I asked the lawyer, like, so what do I do with this situation? Like, you know, like, do I need to pay a fine? Because in Florida you can basically buy your way out of anything. I don't know if it's like that here in Texas, but it's, I mean, as long as you don't a kid or beat up an elderly person in Florida, if you throw some money at it, get a good enough attorney, they're like, hey, we gotcha. But especially something like a PV or something, you know, like, well, we'll get you reinstated or whatever. I'm thinking it's, it's probably not going to be a big deal. But he's like, no, this prosecutor wants incarceration. And I'm like, well, you know, I did the dumb, I bought the ticket, I have to ride the ride. You know, I won the stupid, I played the stupid game. So here's my prize. I got to go back into jail for a while. And I'm like, it's any he Was like, It's anywhere from 30 days to a year year. And I was like, all right, well, how can we try to get it closer to the 30 days than the year? Because I'm gonna take accountability for my actions, but I'd super like to not spend a year in county jail right now. That doesn't sound all that awesome. And so he was like, well, you know, let's get all of your. Because I have done copious amounts of treatment. I've done, you know, inpatient treatment. I've done outpatient treatment. I've done intensive outpatient treatment. You know, in the standard. I did, you know, a full sober living, six month program where I'm, you know, living there, but, you know, out working every day. And, you know, I managed those places. I interned. And, you know, he's like, bring everything. Bring information about your recovery coaching company and bring me letters of character reference. And this is where Cody is going to say that I'm name dropping because I'm gonna. I. I'm blessed, dude. I had people that stuck up for me. And it's not that I'm trying to name drop as much as I never in my life would have thought that I would have these types of people actually writing letters of my character, dude. Like, because, like, I still see myself kind of like I still see my past and my reflection and, you know, there's still. I'm still working on that, letting that part of me go because I'm still feel like I've got stuff to make up for. Like, Like I damaged multiple communities for 20 years, so I still feel the weight of that on my shoulders. And I do everything I can every day to like, bring good into the world to balance those scales. Maybe someday I'll feel like I've made up for that. But I'm not there yet. I'm working on getting there.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, so I sold jelly roll.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, yeah. So jelly roll, jelly rolls over here, his wife, Bunny, they wrote me letters of character reference. Chris Hansen.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And.

[Donut Operator]

And this guy right here, also sheriffs for across the country. In particular, my good friend Sheriff John Staley out of Lonoke County, Arkansas. Amazing, dude. Because I go into prisons and I speak to inmates when they're at a low moment. I go into treatment centers. I had treatment professionals write me letters. But out of all of these letters.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Wait, so they. You were looking at a county year, right?

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. A county year was the max.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So the county was the max. You just finished probation, didn't you? You.

[Donut Operator]

I just finished my probation out of Florida. I. I had two years of house arrest and two years of probation. Flying colors, no violations, not a single wag of the finger even. Yeah, Just absolutely followed it to the letter. Went above and beyond. In fact, my. My PO In Florida was like, please stop calling me about every little thing. And I'm, like, making sure I'm in compliance. And she's like, you're in too much compliance, dude. So. But, you know, that's what I felt like I needed to do to be able to make it through. I don't know how to live like a normal at this point in my life. I'm still figuring it out, you know, but, like, law abiding was not something I was super good at. So, you know, I wanted to make sure what I was doing was what I was supposed to be doing, because I was taking it seriously. I was given a blessing. And every time you're given a blessing or really it was grace, it was. Was grace beyond what I earned or deserved. So I wanted to respect that by following it by the letter. It was important to me because every time I've disrespected a blessing, God slaps the out of me. And dude, got hands, homie. You know what I'm saying?

[JD Delay]

Do not like it. Just slap the J. So give him an inch. He take a mile out of all of those letters. Why he keep doing this?

[Donut Operator]

Out of letters from, oh, my God, me. Why does JD Keep up out of all of those letters? When I went to. So I go to court, and I meet with my lawyer outside the courtroom, and he's like, you ready to go in today? And I'm like, I'm ready to go in. Let's go handle business. This is the last thing I have to do. This is literally out of 20 years of being a degenerate drug addict, career criminal. This is the last thing that I have to pay off. This is my last debt to society, my last criminal anything to deal with. And I'm like, let's go. Go. I'm excited at this point. Like, I'm. I've got three pairs of underwear on. Because if you go into the county jail wearing three pairs of white underwear, they let you keep them. And they don't give you underwear when you go in there. They just give you a jumpsuit. I've got my white T shirt on.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Did not know that.

[Donut Operator]

Very interesting. Certain counties, they let you do that.

[JD Delay]

Pro tips.

[Donut Operator]

And I'm. I'm ready to go. I've got, like, 2k in my pocket for my canteen. I'm gonna get fat kid in there. You know what I'm saying? Just work out, read and eat. And we walk in the courtroom and he's like, that's a different prosecutor. He's like, hold on. He goes and talks to the prosecutor, and the prosecutor's like, he comes back. He's like, the prosecutor knows you from your content and feels like it would be a waste of time and resources to put you in jail when you could be out here continuing to do what you do. So he wants you to his. He wants to give you community service. But his one ask is that you talk about this in a way that shows what taking accountability for your actions can do for you. And I'm like, accountability is my whole entire thing, you know? Like, that's hugely important to me. That's something I live by. And he's like, cool. It's still up to the judge. So we gotta sell this to the judge. And the judge, like, the prosecutor goes harder for me than any paid attorney I've ever had had. Trying to convince this judge that I should get community service. It was incredible. That dude went, I love that dude. And the judge is like, I'm going to read these letters and there's a lot of them. And he's looking through them, he's scrolling through these letters. And I. I mentioned those other people because out of all of those letters, the letter he stops on, he's like, I want to read a quote out of this letter. And he starts reading Rich's letter and he's like, and this is coming from an SVU detective, which shows that this man has made serious life changes. I'm gonna agree with the prosecutor on this and I'm gonna give you the community service.

[Eli Double Tap]

You had a jump out, boy.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, like, yeah. And my wife's going hard for you. My wife's in the courtroom behind me and she's crying. This is the. That woman is a saint. And this is like the fifth time she's had to go to a courtroom. And maybe I come home, maybe I don't. And she's know, just rode out with me through all of this. And she is not a criminal. She's never been a criminal, never been a drug addict. She's just a rider ass trad wife, you know, she's just the, like, literally the best. I would not be here today if it wasn't for her. I'm convinced of that. And I get to walk out on my own two feet, ready to go to jail. I get to walk out. The only thing that he read out loud was Rich's letter. So thank you, man. I haven't gotten to thank you in person. Person. I appreciate it. It. All of that. I know that you didn't go into a career as, you know, an English major, but you definitely helped me. So I feel like that. Three and a half years you spent in college, it did something good. Right here. I'm sitting Cool. Yeah, Good. I didn't have to eat top ramen and cream bologna.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Now let me tell you what really happened. I get a call one day from JD, and I look at my phone. I'm like, oh, JD's calling me. That's fucking cool. Because we've been bullshitting back and forth and talking about some, you know, like, content. Hey, you want to come on my thing? Yeah, I'll come on your thing, but probably coming on things. It's not the way I should have described it.

[JD Delay]

You guys are doing great with verbiage today.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, right?

[Eli Double Tap]

So you're talking about your prison friend.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So my wife's just like, who's calling my hot. It's jd. What's going on? And I get up from the couch, and I'm like, hey, dude, what's going on? He's like, hey, hey, I have a massive favor, and I feel uncomfortable asking you about it. You don't have to do it. This is just a request. He's very nice. You're very nice about it. He was really trying to take the pressure off of me, and he's like, I got picked up for an old dui, and I'm looking at spending a county year. Like, that's the max. I'm just wondering. You can say no. I was like, oh, do you need me to write a character letter for you? He's like, like, can you do that?

[Donut Operator]

And I was like, fuck, yeah, dude. You know how many people I put in jail? I could take one out. Yeah, that's a fair trade. Absolutely.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So I went to work, like, the next day, and I sat down and I was just like.

[JD Delay]

Your dearest judge, J.D.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Delay is a handsome, beautiful man who has served his time with the community and has assisted others in their time in, out, and recovering from prison life.

[Donut Operator]

Life.

[Eli Double Tap]

And then I.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And then. Then I creamed it up with all the stuff that you want to hear. As a Buffalo Police Special Victims Unit detective, formerly attached to the FBI Safe Streets program, hunting violent gang members and seeing the effects the drugs have had in the. In the community, I think that I kept it short and simple. Yeah. Churched up.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. Didn't need. Yeah, I think I can get one guy out.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And then he called me up and he goes, dude, he read your letter out loud. I started jumping up and down and I was like, yeah.

[Donut Operator]

I was like fist pumping. I was like, of course it. God is God.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

God has a good sense of humor. And so, of course, you know, I put in my letter and it's. He. The guy reads mine. And then, yeah, he got off scot free. Didn't learn a thing.

[Donut Operator]

Sir, I've done 22 hours of my. My community service.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

22 hours.

[Donut Operator]

I had to do more for my disorderly condom. I've got. I have to do 80 all together to do 60 something.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Really?

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Oh, I love God.

[Eli Double Tap]

We were talking about last night about officer discretion, where it's like, sometimes you don't have to, you know, be an to the criminals.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

And you're just like, you're a super nice guy. Just writing this letter for J.D.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

That's awesome, man.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I'm just glad I could help him out. I was glad that you called me.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That made me happy that you called me. I was like, cool.

[Donut Operator]

Well, you know, like, I don't ever want to ask somebody to vouch for me, like, especially, you know, my past, you know, my history. But me and you are friends, and I think, you know that I'm not going to take advantage of it and go out and do damage to the community. I feel like you at this point know me well enough to know that if you help me swerve a county year, I'm not going to be out like, murdering ladies or anything like that might be murdering that butthole. But, you know, that's different. My butthole or Tony's or.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Or, you know, Mormon butthole, because God cannot see it.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, my God.

[Donut Operator]

J.D.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Delay is gone. I cannot see him while he inside another person's butthole.

[Donut Operator]

That's. That's where I should hide if the SWAT team ever comes for me again. I love Tony's butthole.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

One of my favorite stories that you talked about, the, The. The first time when we met was like, you're like, yeah, I hate a pile of clothes. And I was like, that's why I jump on piles of clothes when I used to search houses.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, that's what. Yeah.

[JD Delay]

I wanted to. That those are other topics because it was like, oh, man. From each we get. We get to break down both sides. It's like your worst chase or favorite chase. Well, I don't know how to say that for you.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

The one that Ended the best for me.

[JD Delay]

Yeah. Yeah. What chase is that? Because then I went like, you guys breaking that down? And then vice versa. Your guys is like, oh, this chase sucked. Or this chase was dope. But here's X, Y and Z. Oh.

[Eli Double Tap]

Dudes that hide behind doors. I broke a guy's nose one time cuz I just pushed the door in as hard as I could. Cuz they teach you that?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, you got to clear the. You got to clear the back.

[Eli Double Tap]

Hit the door as hard as you can. Cuz people try to hide behind doors.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

And so just hit it as hard as you can. Oh, you. You just hear an O and you're like, found him.

[JD Delay]

Hey, Brandon, do you have Cash app? Brandon, I asked you a f Cking question.

[Eli Double Tap]

No, Eli.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

What's that?

[JD Delay]

Do you have Cash app? Brandon, how did you do that? Brandon, anything's possible when you use Cash app.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Okay?

[Donut Operator]

Moving money should be easy, Brandon.

[JD Delay]

That's why there's Cash app.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Wow, this is really easy to use.

[Donut Operator]

I have it now.

[Eli Double Tap]

Don't hit me again.

[JD Delay]

Catch up is fast, safe, and way more personalized than the other apps out there. No extra hoops to jump through, no extra stress.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

All the tools are right there to.

[JD Delay]

Help you cash in. Plus, sending money through Cash app actually feels safe and secure. If something seems sketchy or there's like.

[Donut Operator]

Red flags that you might be sending your money to a scammer, they let you know.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

They'll give you a warning and make you think twice before hitting send.

[Donut Operator]

It's like having a bodyguard for your cash. Send your bunny some money with the eggplant emoji.

[JD Delay]

My favorite.

[Donut Operator]

Make his friends think twice. Brandon, what are these three drops of.

[JD Delay]

Water and an eggplant mean?

[Eli Double Tap]

It's a tip for good service.

[Donut Operator]

I like tips.

[JD Delay]

Tips. Just a tip.

[Donut Operator]

Just.

[Eli Double Tap]

Just the tip.

[Donut Operator]

And for whatever reason, if you don't.

[JD Delay]

Have Cash app, just head over to your phone app store and download it today and use code UNSUB10.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And if you send $5 to a friend, you get $10 deposited in your account.

[JD Delay]

Just for getting started, send Brandon $5. His number is.3 new cash app users can use our exclusive code to earn some additional cash.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Legit.

[JD Delay]

For reals? No catch.

[Donut Operator]

Just download Cash app and use our code unsubbed10. Send $5 to a friend within 14 days and you'll get 10 bucks dropped.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Right into your account.

[Donut Operator]

That's money.

[JD Delay]

That's Cash app.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

My. My favorite thing to do. Tell me if you've fallen for this before. I'll just go into like a building. And I'm like, bro, I see you. Show me your hands and come out and I'll say it like two or three. I'll be like, dude, I'm serious.

[Donut Operator]

I'm not.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Don't make me come in there and get you. You come out with your hands up. I can see you. And they'll be like, damn it. And I'll be like, oh, sweet. You know, didn't see you.

[Donut Operator]

Just yourself on the next time you try that. I thought I saw a dude one time. I did not.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I said it. And I was looking at the area.

[Donut Operator]

Where I thought I saw him.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Dude came out of another area.

[Donut Operator]

I was like, oh, yeah, I knew you were there. Get on the ground. How many are in here?

[Eli Double Tap]

It's like I talk about all the time, like policing really is just like daycare. It's adult daycare. So it's like, Eli, when you're playing hide and go seek with your kid, like Rich was just talking about, just like, I see you. And they go, yeah, you got me. It's like, I didn't.

[Donut Operator]

Bro. And imagine being a correctional officer because that really is. Is adult daycare. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's like. Like 100 I've talked. I've sat and chopped it up with cos. And they're like, yeah, I mean, I'm basically a babysitter, bro. I'm a babysitter for grown ass men who all are trying to prove they have the biggest dick. And it's true. Yeah, it's true. There's so many people in prison with complexes, bro. Like, everybody in prison is. Is. Has some sort of mental illness. There's, as my friend Grady Judd would say, there's a hitch in their giddy up somewhere. I realized that at some a certain point. I realized that like Most of the 99 of the people I knew were just kids that got traumatized as a kid. Didn't know how to process it, didn't know how to properly place it. Never got therapy, including my self. And so we ended up acting out and our development stopped because of the trauma. And then we continued to atrophy our development with numbing out because we couldn't handle our feelings. And then you get to prison and everybody's just trying to prove that they're Billy Badass, you know?

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah. Did you drop Grady Judd's name down right there? Sheriff Grady Judd.

[Donut Operator]

Somewhere down there. Your friend Grady somewhere down there. But yeah, that's one of my favorite sayings, though. I love it when he says there's a hitch in his giddy up. That shit's great.

[Eli Double Tap]

That's such a cowboy thing to say.

[Donut Operator]

It is, dude. It is. The Florida sheriffs are like wild west sheriffs, dude. Him and Chitwood and then the, the dude from Lee County. What's his name? Marcino.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Cool. Which one's the guy that has the photos? And he likes talk. He loves the photos. Okay, that you did the tick tock with. This is illegal. Yeah, dude. I, I face palmed so hard when I saw that, I was like, what? In a good way. I was like, what the is happening? What world am I living in, bro?

[Donut Operator]

His social media person, she is fire, bro. She's like, I have the perfect tick tock trend for you guys.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

She thought of it.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, that's.

[Donut Operator]

Yes. And so he's like, me and him are both lip syncing to this song. Hello, it's nice to meet you. And he's like, am I doing this right? This feels weird. I feel. I don't feel right doing this. And she's like, you nailed it. And I'm like, I don't even remember the lines. Yeah, that popped off. And then.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Is this illegal? Yeah, it feels illegal.

[Donut Operator]

Two weeks of just like, JD's a Nazi bootlicker. In my comments, I'm like, thank you for upping my engagement. Talk more about my not an alligator Alcatraz shirt and make my sales go higher. Yeah, I have a Florida around and find out shirt that has nothing to do with alligator Alcatraz. Since I, I joined Bunker Branding, Is that name dropping too? But since I joined Bunker Branding, it's okay if it's advertising for us. So I planned this out like two months ahead of time for a shirt just with an alligator holding an assault rifle with a bulletproof vest on. And in the background, there's like palm trees and a Florida ghetto. And it says Florida around and find out. I'm just a very Florida centric person, dude. I spent a decade there. I have an alligator tattooed on the side of my head. I, I with the swamp puppies, dog. They're my, they're my people. And so it ends up dropping the day that I fly out to Florida so that we just, we just timed it like that. We were like, I'm. I'm flying in on the 1st and we're doing a new drop on the 1st. Let's do the Florida round and find out show shirt. It's been out for. We've. We've thought about this months ago. It Just happened to be the day that they opened Alligator Alcatraz. And it's all over the news and everybody's like, oh, he's a Nazi and it's a concentration camp. And like, I also fed into it a little bit. Like, just comparing how the treatment in Alligator Alcatraz is compared to how we treat people all around the country in any sort of incarcerated situation. Like, I'm like, look, these are. This is where they're. They're the. The living quarters for them. This is a normal dorm setting. There's three toilets. The sinks are on the toilets, which is something that. God. What the. Was her. Debbie Wasserman Schwartz was and drink in the same place, you dumbass. Performative. Have you never seen what. That's inmate standards. That's your sink is on top of your toilet. And she's like, it's so degrading and dehumanizing the way we're treating. Like, their mattresses are this thick, homie. Like, we got like that. You know what I'm saying? Like, it was so crazy, all of the performative going on. And I was just like, look, this is just normal. This is what we do. And then there was a rumor that they were. Somebody did a video with pictures of an incinerators, and they're like showing trash incinerators that aren't on site at Alligator Alcatraz. And there was a. A tick tock rumor that somebody's cousin said that her friend was contracted to install these at Alligator Alcatraz. And so they're. Everybody's like, they're gonna. They're burning illegals. And I'm like, first off, you can't burn a body in those. Like, that's literally a trash incinerator. Like, what are you talking about? Yeah, absolutely. It does not work.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. Times. You got to put them back in there, cut up the limbs. It's just a mess.

[Donut Operator]

Like, if you want to talk about how we treat people when they're incarcerated in this country, cool. But let's do it across the board and not just make it about what fits this. This narrative. You know what I'm saying? Because there's things we probably could like, do better as far as incarcerating people. I don't think the conditions need to be worked on too much in the majority of places. I think what we need to do is start focusing more on rehabilitation. Rehabilitation. And I think that, like, if you have inmates in a minimum custody facility, I feel like that's a waste, bro. Put them on community control. Put them in House arrest. So they're working, they're working towards building, you know, their future and all of that. At least make it an open option for that to be able to be a thing. They're paying taxes instead of just taking up tax dollars sitting in some minimum custody thing. When you're in minimum them, you're a few years to the gate anyway. Let them spend that time doing something productive instead of being a drain. Like I always told myself when I'm in prison, I'm literally on welfare right now. Like I'm taking up people's tax dollars. This sucks. This is stupid. I'm a piece of for this. Let. Let them give back to society and save. Imprisoning people for people that just can't be trusted in society. And honestly, if you can't be trusted in society, there's some things that with proper rehabilitation you might be able to come back from. And there's other things that you can't. And if you are not somebody that can be rehabilitated, we should not be wasting tax dollars on keeping you breathing. There's a very, there are very cost effective ways to just handle the situation. Chalk you up as a loss. If you a kid, bro, we shouldn't be like, oh well, you know, when he comes out and six months he's gonna not do this again. Well, you know, statistically he is, you know, somebody who goes in and does a school shooting. Why the do you get the chance to come out and do that again? That we shouldn't pay for your three hots in a cot when we can just do the, you know, rope is super eco friendly and you could reuse that a lot. A lot.

[Eli Double Tap]

Rich, I gotta ask you, buddy, ask me how do we solve the problem with. Do you. Do you think we should have public hangings? Like back in the day, like cowboy days? So you remember they, they used to have like everyone to come from everywhere and they would sit there and they would have a picnic and they would like watch the public hangings.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I think it should be put on like pbs. I think, I think if you have a, like Trump.

[Donut Operator]

Cancel that. Do we still have pbs?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, but we can make a pay per view you.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Give it to Dana White, bro.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Now it's paying for itself and you get to see like, will you. The Boston bomber, neighbor.

[JD Delay]

Just after Mr. Rogers. The public execution.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

It's door the explorer.

[Donut Operator]

Can you say execution?

[JD Delay]

Execution.

[Donut Operator]

Bring back gladiator, bro. Just arm. Arm.

[Eli Double Tap]

We were talking about that last night.

[Donut Operator]

Arm. One chomo With a broad sword and another one with a ma case and whichever one comes out on top, you're still gonna kill. Painless, you know, execution. Just a double tap to the back of the dome.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I like the pay per view idea. Now that I said it. I like, I like the state run television pay per view of like an execution of like somebody that murdered somebody or school shooter or the like the Boston Bombers.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, and the money goes towards the charity.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Sure, absolutely.

[JD Delay]

Taxes.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I mean, honestly bro, it goes to like the survivors of Uvalde.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I love, I mean Texas zaps people too, so they can make a lot of money.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, we, we did just get into shooting people too. South Carolina just executed a guy by shooting firing squad.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, it's like Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses. Some of them are like, they can't put anything inside their body and stuff like that. So they'll be like, yeah, firing squad. I'm good to go with that.

[JD Delay]

Yeah. Just.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Could you just blast me in the chest with some 30 odd six?

[JD Delay]

That's what I would be like.

[Eli Double Tap]

But they can slide in the chest. They, they can soak though. They can put things inside.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, well, yeah, they're bullet soaking is what they're doing.

[Eli Double Tap]

Shake the rifle.

[Donut Operator]

What we were discussing on the other show that we did was like Trump is a businessman, right? There's a way to sell this to him as a businessman. Be like, hey, imagine the pay per view sales. Put Dana White in charge of this. It, I see it, you know what I'm saying? And you wanna, you wanna get the deficit handled, Boom, we could do that. I like the charity idea, but if you're actually gonna sell it to somebody who can get that done, make it make sense.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Business wise, illegals, we, we ship them off, but they have to do like that, that, that Asian show where they had to run across stuff.

[Donut Operator]

Squid game.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

No, no, God, no.

[Donut Operator]

That's my game. What is the game called? Yes.

[JD Delay]

Takishi's Castle.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Takisha's Castle.

[JD Delay]

Takashi. Is it Takisha. Takashi's castle.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Where they have to like run across the obstacles and like fall in the water. And if you're like, oh no, you know, remember when they would dub it really poorly?

[JD Delay]

Oh yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Those are my favorites. I love those. We do that for illegal immigration. If you make it get to stay, if you don't, you're out of here.

[JD Delay]

And it's the fun one.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And make that paper, you know, put that on a television show, you'll have got endless amounts of entertainment for years.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

There's no violence on it. It is funny as hell.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And then if they split it up so it's not just a bunch of Mexican and brown people.

[JD Delay]

It's not Hunger Games.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

You're like, they die games.

[Donut Operator]

I want 5, 000 people to try.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Out, and I want one to live. And he gets the citizenship.

[Donut Operator]

Like, brutal.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Damn.

[Donut Operator]

So, I mean, but here's the thing, is that, like, they're super focusing on just the brown people that are getting deported.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Brothers, whites.

[Donut Operator]

I know there is.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I know Europeans.

[Donut Operator]

I followed this Russian chick on Tick Tock who was like, yeah, I'm being deported. Thanks a lot, Trump.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Canadians, too. The out of here.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, man.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Ice packs. Snow Mexicans.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, Snow Mexicans.

[Eli Double Tap]

I have the frostbacks.

[JD Delay]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Frostbites. I have. I want to tell you the story. I. I accidentally.

[Donut Operator]

Not.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Not accidentally, but I have a feud, I guess, with a. An inmate in a Colorado prison who writes articles.

[Donut Operator]

Okay.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So I'll give you the backstory.

[Donut Operator]

Are you asking me to put out a hit? Because I know people in Colorado prisons.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I'm sure you do.

[Donut Operator]

I have a gang out there that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I'm probably make another video on on him and. And similar to this. Tell him to politely.

[JD Delay]

JD's like, I know what you're putting down.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, I got you. I got you. I'll square you guys. I got those soups on your canteen.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I need you to fly a kite real quick and let some boys know. Yeah, flip that.

[Donut Operator]

So got a mission for you. For a cop out here and wants somebody dead.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's not a small man, so you might need a bigger dude. So a while ago, about a year, year and a half ago, I made a video because my buddy sent this story to me, and he's like, have you seen this? I was like, no. Know the story is that a Colorado prison system, One of the Colorado prisons had a VFW in it. A veteran from foreign wars community in there. And so they had a post inside of this prison, which is like, cool. Whatever.

[Donut Operator]

That's cool.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That's pretty cool. And I was about it. If you can rehabilitate the people, A lot of the people that were the heads of it were Chomo's. A guy that held a teacher in her basement for hours and tried to kill her four or five times. A guy that killed a college student because he thought she was going to snitch on him because she was moving some ecstasy.

[Donut Operator]

Do you want to know why that is? Why they get in those positions? Because those positions are Usually held for people who can get clear conduct. It's basically there. There's incentive levels in, in a lot of prisons for if you don't get in trouble, if you don't get caught with contraband, if you don't get caught spot balling out another inmate's back passage, if you don't assault staff, you know, and you don't get doctor's disciplinary reports like in Oregon, like there was incentive levels if you get 18 months without that. Which is why dudes like the Happy Face Killer won't fight back when you punch him in his. Because he has over. He got his 18 months clear conduct and he got a special fancy cell. But so to get in those positions where you're running, it usually requires that you have the incentive level to be able to do that, just so you know. And chomos are never an issue for the cops unless a gang sends them on a mission because they're not actual criminals. They're creatures. They're not people committing crimes. They're monsters.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So I make a video where I say hey. And I say this in the video, which they choose to ignore. I say, hey, if you are like getting out, if you had some drug charges, if you stole a bunch of cars and you're trying to flip your life around, hey, there's things we can come back from. One guy smashed a baby on the concrete until it was dead.

[Donut Operator]

Nope.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, that's, that's one of their like vice presidents or chairmans. Like I said, there was like one or two child in there and a guy that like held a woman in a basement and, or a bunch and then tried to kill her a couple of times like during that time period, like choked her out until she passed out and then she came to. So I make a video about it. I say, hey, if it was somebody getting out, cool. These guys are doing like 40 to life, most of them life sentences. I'm like, I don't want chomos and like guys that are murdering like 18 year old college students to be in a better a VFW and be a part of the community. Like you've decided that you don't want to be a part of this community anymore. There's standards for being, you know, a military member. Even if the veteran status stays with you after you get out.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So what ends up happening is like six months, within six months of me posting the video, a lot of people in the VFW community are like, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a second, we've got a VFW in a Prison that represents us members of the vfw. Then there's child in it. No, no, absolutely not. So what ends up happening is the. They start saying, hey, listen, there's a conduct, and we're actually going to be removing people from this VFW inside the prison. Prison. And eventually, oh, yeah, there's so few people in it that they can't have a post. The post goes away.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, no. There was that many.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

There was that many people that had, like, committed serious murders or the kid. Or smashed a kid's face in the concrete.

[Donut Operator]

Murder is one of those things where it's like, who was the victim and what was the reason behind it? Because there are valid reasons to kill people. There's never a valid reason to a kid or to a woman. There are valid reasons for murder, but carry on.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

One of them that I actually like. I didn't side with his murder, but, like, I sided with. With the inmate. He had gotten in, like, some sort of argument with a guy outside of a bar. He went to his truck. The guy came outside, and then he turned around and like, shot him in, like, an alleyway and then drove away. The cops pulled him over. He's like, yeah, I killed him. And. But he owned up to it, right?

[Donut Operator]

Him.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I'm like, okay, cool you up. Maybe you're drunk, maybe you're high. It seems pretty cut and dry. Probably shouldn't have shot that guy, you know, and. But you cop to it.

[Donut Operator]

If he would have stayed and. And talked to the cops, he might have been able to sell it to him in a way where he would have gotten, like, a lesser charge.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I don't know about that. I'm just saying, like, he owned up to what he did, right? He owned up to it.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Right. And even though it was a murder, okay. So the guy that wrote one of the articles writes about it that I read, writes another article in response to my video, and he goes, basically, I.

[Donut Operator]

Have a piece of shit that he doesn't give a about.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And I took away the VFW from him. He was like one of the tertiary, third or fourth in, like, the chain of command, like vice president, assistant vice president, whatever, in the vfw. And he goes on a little bit of a tant or a rant, and it's just like, you took away something good from us. Fuck that guy. We were doing great things. Doesn't talk about any of the chomos that were in the unit as, like, the vice president.

[Donut Operator]

What was his charge?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

His charge was he was a drug dealer and he Killed old, like an 18 or 19 year old female college student because she was moving ecstasy, like buying ecstasy from him. And then he thought that she was snitching to the cops. So we are off to her.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

No, him and like Tim and like two dudes like broke into her apartment and killed her.

[Donut Operator]

No.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And then like him. Yeah. It's like.

[Donut Operator]

It's not. That's about. Even by like convict code, which is scumbaggery. It's bottom of the barrel morality. No, that's a big old. No. Him. So.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So he tells me via his article that he writes is like a month or two old now. I was gonna do a video on it. Maybe I will again. Yeah. That basically I'm scum because I took away his VFW.

[Donut Operator]

The. The dude who killed a little 18 year old girl because he was a drug dealer and he didn't want to get caught. Oh, that dude thinks that you're scum.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

Which I could give a. Timbers are shivered over here.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. He. He also talks to like somebody in like the Colorado press. And I talked to this guy in the Colorado press, a little bit more of a story story. So this guy in this Colorado news establishment is like, hey, can I call you up and talk to you about this thing, your video that you did? I was like, sure. So I talked to him about it and he goes, you know, like, how do you feel about that? I go, well, I feel like the VFW is for doing that. He's like, oh, interesting. I was like, you can quote me on that. Yeah, it's retarded.

[Donut Operator]

And. And he did, God bless him, said it's retarded.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Now what he did with the article was he tried to paint me as like some sort of dirty cop that shouldn't be listened to. Just like, oh, he's controversial. But then on this opposite side of the same coin is like, these guys in the VFW deserve a second chance. Murderers and child, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[Donut Operator]

Well, here's the thing is that if they were serious about that, they should have policed their own community in there. Boom. And that is a major thing in prison is you are who you associate with.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

Like it's birds of a feather flock together. Chimos and bows and punks and rats all have each other's backs. Like, if you are in prison and you are sitting at the same table as a child, you are a baby.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

If you're sitting at the table with somebody who women or kills women or children, you are that person who you Are who you associate with is a reflection of you. So they should have had the moral aptitude and the spine to have those people removed from those positions. And in prison, oftentimes, since you don't go to the authorities about things, what that means is you have somebody or you personally yourself take them off the yard. Which means, you know, if, if you want to extort somebody into it, you send a torpedo. Torpedoes are great. You could call them a torpedo or crash test dummy. You get somebody who's on a bad charge and you tell them, hey, check it out. We are gonna give you extra breathing holes all throughout your neck. And it's. You're not going to be breathing through them for very long. Wrong. Unless you go and do this. Here's what I want you to do. You see that big old fat child over there? Go take flight on him. And you don't have to win. Both of you just have to go to the hole. Just go take flight, do it right in front of the cops. And then they both go to the hole and your problem is solved for a little bit. And then by the time he gets out, he's not going to have that. We talked about the incentive program. He just got a doctor. He's out for at least 18 months. And if he ever gets back in, you just rinse, repeat. They should have been policing their own community if they wanted to keep a community. Yeah, I'm sorry, but that's, that's, that is what it is. He sounds like he is on some punk to me. Because I mean, well, look at his charge. Of course he's going to sympathize with people who kids and lock women in basements and them because he's on that same type of scumbag ass time. Thank you. That's the prison view of it.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. I felt my two cents was that, hey, listen, if you murder somebody but you cop up to it. If you did a whole bunch of like, you know, stealing burglaries and, but you're trying to get out even if you got like a life term for whatever like own your. But when you've got a bunch of child in it and you're not policing your own, you're like, oh cool. Everybody come to the VFW. Including like the guy that 28 year olds and then got caught with a bunch of child. Child and dozens of kids used underwears like in his house when he got raided a couple years ago. And that's what, that's the time he's serving. Like maybe you should not have that guy. Maybe you shouldn't have the guy that bashes his girlfriend's kid's face like 1 year old, 18 month old into a freaking concrete and then be like, oh yeah, it fell down the stairs. And then when the medical examiners looked or they're like, no, this baby had its head the shaken out of it that its brain stem was removed. Removed from it. Like dislocated from itself is detached. Like, like.

[Donut Operator]

And I'm, and I'm.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And then, yeah, you're the bad guy.

[JD Delay]

They're like, look at what this guy did. You're like, oh, he ruined my VFW time.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And I'm like, fuck you.

[JD Delay]

VFW Looked at the situation was like, oh yeah, remove that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That's.

[Donut Operator]

That'S it.

[JD Delay]

Like no business. Wouldn't want to be associated with individuals like that. And then I'm assuming other veterans that were in prison with him probably didn't want to be part of the, that VFW class either.

[Donut Operator]

And that's why, that's why there's so. Contrary to popular belief, there are a lot of gang members that are, are like devout Christians and like that, but they don't go to church. Because there's a saying in prison, not everybody who goes to church is a chomo, but all chomos go to church. And people that are really about that life are not about to go sit with a, you know, a, on this side of them and a diaper sniffer on the other side of them. They're just not going to do it. Yeah, you know, there's, there's certain things that you avoid. I liked it at Snake River. We, we had a system where there were certain dudes with bad charges that were like, they were allowed to go on the yard because they were paying gangs or whatever, which isn't my personal politics. You're not you, you don't deserve sunlight or fresh air if you hurt a kid. But that was. They all had to stay on the volleyball court court. So you'd see just all these weird looking coke bottle glasses, triple chins. Oh dude.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I was like, especially the ones that boys are like some of the most saddest turtle looking frog people I've ever seen.

[Donut Operator]

And bro, like, they're like, it's, it's funny because you know, you can see it. You guys at home can see it. If you watch stuff like watch, you know, Gideon and Alex Rossen's bus and Chris Hansen's bus, you'll see that the, the people that are into young boys, like they're they're mentally fake, bro. Yeah, they're meant. They're not mentally all there. Do I feel bad for them? No, I don't. I don't. Them. They should be executed. But, you know, it's a real life thing that most of them are just completely in the dome, you know? And then every once in a while, you have, like, the. The decent looking, very charismatic, you know, youth pastor or teacher or something that. But for the most part, there's a look. So when you see a volleyball sand pit, volleyball court full of all these you guys want to play Dungeons and Dragons type, it is hilarious to watch, bro. Like, one of them will. It'll be the first day, and one of them's, like, out. Stumbling out towards the weight pile. I think I'm gonna do some. No, you're gonna go to that volleyball court. Get the out of here before we. You up. Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Nerds.

[Donut Operator]

Nerds.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

The prison nerds are chomos.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Yeah, that's. That's l. How it is, bro. It's crazy.

[JD Delay]

W. Dude, prison is.

[Donut Operator]

You were talking about KB Shakers, bro.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

There was a. A dude that. He was all over the news in Oregon. He had shook a baby to death. We knew he was coming. We didn't know what. What institution he'd land in, because there's, I. I think maybe like 16, 17 prisons in Oregon last time I counted. I don't know, give or take. They might have shut some down. But he ended up landing at the prison that I was at that. And he immediately asked for PC and the cops were like, no. Baby shaker. No. And when he came on the. You. The. The. The block, the cop announced, what's PC For?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Protective.

[Donut Operator]

Protective custody. That's where they. They put you in a solitary cell. And you sit there and you rot in a solitary cell. And they. You don't get a lot of access, but it's still inmates making your food. It's still inmates bringing you your food. It's still inmates doing your laundry. So they'll, like, put broken glass and human feces in their food. They'll. They'll put. There's chemicals in the laundry room that they can put into your. Your laundry so that when you put it on, it's fine. But as soon as you sweat, like, the. The moisture activates it and it gives you horrific chemical burns. Like, sometimes they have to take you out to medical, and you'll be walking across the control room floor and somebody will take. Just take flight on your punk ass. But this dude, they refused him PC and announced that this is the baby shaker coming in. Right. And so like everybody knew this dude was a baby shaker, bro. And he ended up falling up a flight of cement stairs.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Let's just say tragedy. It happens a lot.

[Eli Double Tap]

Horrible.

[Donut Operator]

He, he, he was super up and, and non verbal when the cops came and, and took him out and they took him and they just took him to the hole. They didn't even take his ass to medical. They just. Oh, he's on the floor all up covered in his own blood looking. They dragged him to the hole. He ended up dying of an aneurysm in the hole.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Damn.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Not sad about that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Similar the way that the baby probably died. Yeah. Oh no.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Isn't that poetic though?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Poetic justice.

[Donut Operator]

Poetic.

[JD Delay]

I just like all the guys who are like, what happened? He felt up the stairs.

[Donut Operator]

It's like the sound of a. The sound of a skull bouncing off cement. I'm sure you've heard it.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I, I've done it to myself before. Let me tell you.

[Donut Operator]

It's not cool when it's yours. It's cool when it's a baby shakers.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You can it like. It's like you have an out of body experience. I, I bounce my face off of the most unforgiving thing in the world, which is blacktop.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I've done that before. And I thought I broke the whole side of my face and that was just me falling over and I hit the pavement and that blacktop just, just jacked up my face. So yes, I, I've, I've dealt with that.

[Donut Operator]

As a drummer. I wish that I could go and record the sound of that dude's skull hitting the pavement and then have it like on, on a, you know, mixer. Yeah. And so use it as an alternate snare drum. Like, bro. Speaking of, of, of cops hitting their heads, bro. I like we'll always and forever. I'm sorry. Deputy wise. Right. When I escaped from county jail, which it isn't as cool as it sounds because I did not get far and I was, I was in the work release area. Right. But they told me I needed to pack my up. I'd been in work release for like months. And Deputy White was super cool to me. He was always respectful. He was super cool. He told me. And he's not supposed to. He broke protocol to allow me to go pack my up. He said delay. You had a warrant come from Portland from Multnomah County. We need to roll you up. You're going to do the rest of your time over in the in the county jail. And then we're going to transport you to Multnomah, so I'm gonna let you roll your own up. And I was like, okay, bet. So I went upstairs to my little room and I threw, like, my Discman. This is how long this ago this was in my CDs and, like three cartons of cigarettes into my backpack and snuck around the little guard station and made a bolt for the door once, because they had to buzz you in and out when somebody got buzzed out. As soon as the door opened, I ran right past them. And so they're running after me, right? And then I see cos coming from the other direction from the jail. Like, their response time was impeccable. And I'm running, and I run through a parking lot. And to get in the parking lot, you have to jump over these shrubs that are about yay high. But there's a little tree with some landscaping wire running. And Deputy White, a guy I genuinely like right behind me, jumps, and his foot hits the landscaping wire and he goes. And I'm like, I stopped. And I'm like, deputy White, are you okay? He goes, just stop, delay. And I'm like, no. And I start running. I get to the other side of the parking lot and cop cars are pulling up, opening the door, raining down on me. And I just throw my backpack in the air. And I'm like, I'm just playing let's go back to jail. And I get down, right? And they put my hands behind my back, they cuff me off. Up 1. One CEO has his boot on the back of my head, pushing my face into the pavement as hard as he can. And like six of them just boot mosh the out of me, bro. Just kick the out of me. Meanwhile, there's witnesses because this is out right in front of, like, this restaurant. And they're just boot moshing the out of me in front of all these civilians who are like. They're like, gas did, bro. And they take me and throw me in the hole. And they come to me at, like, it's hard to tell the time in the hole, but to me, it felt like four in the morning. I also probably had a really bad concussion. And they're like, hey, if you sign this, we won't press charges for escape. And that's five years in prison. And I'm like, so I can go home? And they're like, yeah, sure, okay, you can go home. And I'm like, what does this say? I can't even read. I'm so up, bro. They me up and they're like, it just says that you're not gonna.

[Eli Double Tap]

What is it, Rich? If I'm chasing you and ass whooping's coming with me.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, dude, no, I. I'm not blaming them. Like, I deserve to have my. My ass whooped for that. And I. And a cop got hurt, bro. A cop got hurt. I didn't physically touch him, but a cop got hurt because of my actions. I. I deserved an ass whooping. I'm not complaining about that. I'm just saying it's hard to read, you know? So like, they're like, it says that you're not going to sue us or try to press charges for excessive force. And I'm like, okay, cool. And so I signed this and I'm like, can I pack up and go home? They're like, no, stupid. You're gonna stay here in the hole until we take you to Portland to go face those charges. And our like, shucks.

[JD Delay]

I just like, I'm going to make it on foot. I'm sure I will run as far as I can on.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Your planning wasn't very good.

[Donut Operator]

No, dude, no, no, that's. I said I was a career criminal. I didn't say I was good at it.

[JD Delay]

When that door opens, I can make.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

A run for it. Where am I going? I haven't thought about that yet.

[Donut Operator]

And it's. It's funny because when I went to prison in Oregon, it was after that that. And they still let me go on outside work crews. So I go from being in a maximum security prison where I'm sleeping with a tiny shank under my pillow and, and like, I'm ready to flush that if I hear the doors crack. And it's a. A CEO there be. So I don't get a three to five year charge for having a blade. And then they. They move me to a minimum. And the day after they move me there, they're dropping me off in a park with a chainsaw.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And I'm like, that's a change.

[Donut Operator]

I love chainsaws. You know what I'm saying? Like, let's actually go. Let's go. I'm like, I'm like, I got a big girl that could drop off tobacco and liquor in these bushes for me so that we could get drunk while we're out here and smoke lots of cigarettes. I was like, this is great, but it was like a culture shock. But they let me go on the outside work cruise with that on my record. But when I got to Florida, I was just In a county jail. And they had work crews that were going out, and I applied and they were like, no, you're denied. And I'm like, why the am I denied, bro? Like. And they're like, oh, you had a. You had an escape. And I'm like, no, no, I signed a paper. I signed a paper. They're like, you. I'm like, God damn it.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You running around with a chainsaw is like. Like, doing that reminds me of, like, giving like a 17, 18 year old brand new, private, like, any sort of equipment to like, hey, go mow the lawn over there. Here's a change that I got done some branches.

[Donut Operator]

And they're like, you're like, no, private. Well, I've bro, I've worked for tree services, and I know how to run a wood chipper or a chainsaw. But did I tell you guys last time I was here, did I tell you guys the story about how we. We made a dude stuff a dead bird's head in his.

[JD Delay]

Blank?

[Eli Double Tap]

I don't believe I've heard this story before.

[Donut Operator]

I'm on that work crew, and we're. We're working in parks, and there was one dude on the work crew that we didn't like because he was. He was a snitch. And so nobody with him, nobody trusted him. But I had a big girl that was dropping off tobacco and alcohol in the bushes, and then we would pack it up, like me and. Me and the south side or huro. We would pack it up into, you know, plugs for everybody else to stick up their ass and bring back into the institution inside themselves. And then they would get in there and they would open it up and they would split it in half. They got to keep half of everything they brought in there. We got the other half so that we were in there smoking the whole time that we're there.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

You know, and selling cigarettes for canteen. We had multiple people's boxes full of. Full of food and, like, that we were balling out on tobacco. Tobacco was my hustle in prison. So this dude that's a snitch keeps. He knows we're doing some, but we're not telling him. And he keeps begging. He's like, please, let me in. I really like cigarettes. I really want to smoke. And finally wo. One day is like, hey, I found a dead bird. And I'm like, okay. He's like, let's make him put this up his ass. I'm like, dog, that thing's too big. He's like, I'll cut its head Off. So he uses his pruning shears to cut its head off. Any. I'm just imagining Petey from Dumb and Dumber. The tape, what you do with Petey?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I took care of it.

[JD Delay]

Pretty bird, pretty bird.

[Donut Operator]

The head falls off and it's up your buddy's ass or that dude's ass. So he, he wraps it up in two sandwich bags, just like we would with tobacco. And then takes the finger of a glove you wraps it around. Wraps. Takes another finger, wraps it around the other side, ties it up tight, right? Takes it to the dude and tells him, look, you got to give us half when you get back in the institution or we'll never with you again, right? And we're all on the same unit. So we get back to the unit and he goes to the bathrooms and everybody's like standing outside the stall just listening, just. We're all just like enthralled. We're like, yes. This dude's got a dead bird in his ass. He's gonna give birth to a bird. Bro screamed. I will never forget his scream. I cannot hit that pitch. Dog. Dog. He screamed like a full on female and freaked out. We hear the toilet flush. He steps out and wedo's like, where's our half bro? And he's like, these are pieces of. We ended up getting him kicked off the work crew too. It was cool.

[JD Delay]

I mean, prison life is a little different than I'm used to.

[Eli Double Tap]

Well, no, it almost sounds like barracks type. It's like, we're gonna make this dude do this. Yeah, it's like he. He's got crabs. We're gonna make him light half his pubes on fire. And.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, does that go for the cr.

[JD Delay]

Wild dude?

[Eli Double Tap]

Prison sounds just like Barrack's life, though.

[Donut Operator]

I mean, prison is terrible and it's stupid. I hate to admit it. On the Internet, I always try to let people know how, like how degrading and disgusting it is and how it's your own fault and how you're leaving your family hang. Like literally, you're leaving your family hanging. You're damaging your family like you're damaging your community. It's not. It does. It's not a rite of passage. It doesn't make you a man. It means you were a scumbag and you were sloppy enough to get caught. But the part I don't talk about on the Internet because I'm not trying to encourage to do, is it's also kind of fun and hilarious. Sometimes It'll be like 90% boredom and then there'll be like 8% fun and then 2% extreme violence.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

So, I mean, sounds exactly like Barrack's life.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, I was about to say it's just like, like boot camp, barracks life.

[JD Delay]

God, I man, wild to me, I'm like, that sounds terrible.

[Donut Operator]

All of it.

[JD Delay]

It's like the Japanese prisons. When you read how they operate, they are perfectly clean, no one's out of line. And they have the most simple punishment.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

When you up or do anything, no birds and buttholes.

[JD Delay]

No birds and buttholes.

[Donut Operator]

Tell me, what's the punishment?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Punishment? Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Oh, so. So they are very strict. So you have to keep your cell and everything you do extremely organized. Like your shoes go into place. Everything goes into place and it has to be there every time a CEO comes by, talks to you, anything. And you get in line, you walk in that perfect line and they, they do not deviate from those lines. And when you, when they talk about, oh, why does everyone behave so well? It's like, oh, well if, if they fuck up or let's say their shoes are out of place or even a pencil is not in the right place, they have to self reflect. It's like, okay, well what's that mean? Oh well, you just have to sit in the, you know, traditional, like samurai on your knees. This. Oh, well, you sit there for it can be one week to a month.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, fuck me.

[JD Delay]

That's it. You are expected from when you rise till you go to bed to sit and you cannot get it up on your knees in that position and stare at the wall. And they don't give you a time frame. Starts at a week and then it can go to a month and even further. They're like, so, yeah, what do they.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Do if they don't?

[JD Delay]

Oh, do you know how their executions work?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Even I've, I've seen like a thing where it's like a guy in a room and they go in and behead somebody. I don't know, it's a hanging.

[JD Delay]

But they don't even, they don't even tell you when you get executed. That's another thing. If you're on, what is it?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Death row.

[JD Delay]

Death row. There is no telling you the date, the time it is. They will just come to your room and be like, and walk you to the little hanging room and you just hang and then they leave. It's wild when you see how they operate their system.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

It's like, whoa, so what if you don't, if you don't reflect, they hang you.

[JD Delay]

I actually, let's see what Happens, right?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Cuz like, if you're like, my shoes are off. And they're like, you need to reflect for a week. And you're like, you. I'm not going to too.

[Eli Double Tap]

What's that movie with Jared Leto?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

The.

[Eli Double Tap]

Where he's a World War II veteran? Do you know what I'm talking about, Eli? He. He, like Jared Leto, what happens?

[JD Delay]

Does he become something afterwards?

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, yeah. He.

[Eli Double Tap]

He becomes like a gangster. He's like. Becomes yakuza afterwards.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

No, no, no, I know what you're talking about. Yeah, like he. He stays in Japan and ends up becoming like a yakuza. Up.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, he ends up like, killing one of his former dudes that he worked with. Like one of the officers that he worked with.

[JD Delay]

I need to watch that one. I don't think I've seen that one.

[Eli Double Tap]

Dude, you're so heavy into, like, Japanese stuff and you haven't seen that one? No, it's cool.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Is it a cool movie?

[Eli Double Tap]

It actually is a cool Jiren.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You say Leto, I say Leto. Jared Leto is Leto. Whatever. He. He's good as a secondary character because he's. He plays a person you can hate very well. But like, I. I would. I'm hesitant to watch him in a movie where he's the main character just because he doesn't. He can't carry movie on its own. Morbius.

[Eli Double Tap]

And yeah, it's a cool movie show.

[Donut Operator]

What's.

[Eli Double Tap]

What. What is that movie with Jared Leto?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

The Outsider.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, yeah, because he's in.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Because he's white and he's in your pen.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, because he's outside.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Good job show.

[Donut Operator]

So if we take the reins from.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Savannah, when does know she's doing typing in. In Bing, probably.

[Eli Double Tap]

Have you seen that, jd?

[Donut Operator]

I haven't.

[Eli Double Tap]

The Outsider with Jared Leto. Leto.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I say Leto. I don't know.

[Donut Operator]

I had a bad experience with him, so I just sort of wrote him off.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Tell me more about your experience.

[Donut Operator]

Jared Lotto, necessarily. My bad experience. It was a young girl's bad experience that I knew. When he came through and did the prefontaine movie in Eugene, Oregon, he did one of my friends really dirty and kicked her out of a hotel room without her clothes, and she narrowly escaped without getting assaulted. So I just. From then on out, I was like, jared Leto, you know, well, that was a random story. So.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Allegedly.

[Donut Operator]

Allegedly.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Allegedly. She gets. Gets kicked out of a room with Jared. Jared's like, you're not getting your clothes. You.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, he wanted to go farther than she wanted to go.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And blood sacrifice, likely. He's a demon.

[Donut Operator]

I mean, and now it makes a lot of sense, all these allegations that are coming out, because it's something that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, are there allegations?

[Donut Operator]

There's so many allegations right now, bro. He had that weird island thing. Anytime a rich white dude has an island and he did this, like, cult experience, you can come be in Jared Leto's cult and everybody's wearing white robes.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Similar thing with his acting classes.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah, yeah. So it was like this. This Leto island experience. I just don't trust white people that own islands at this point, bro.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah. Wait. Sh. Sh. Did something.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I knew a guy that was an actor is still an actor, and he sh. Was having some sort of acting class thing going on. And it wasn't a cult, but it was ran very cultish. So these people paid money to get trained by Shia LaBeouf. And it was like this acting course, and Shia LaBeouf would, you know, teach them how to act. There was the normalcies of acting. Right. But surrounding the acting and in between, he would be, like, extremely manipulative to them and, like, talk down to them and try to get them to submit to his, like, knowledge, power, or whatever. And the guy that I knew was, like, six. Six and not small. And Shia LaBeouf isn't that tall and, you know, shadow buff was like, fuck you.

[Donut Operator]

You want to buy a.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You know, it's like trying to, like, intimidate him, and he's just like, you okay, little fella?

[JD Delay]

Was this years ago?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, it was years ago.

[Donut Operator]

This is.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

This is an old story about.

[JD Delay]

That's why I think, like, six years. Plus there was a period. I know he. John Bertha is the one that, like, gave him a reality check, I believe.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Is that the Punisher?

[JD Delay]

Yeah. That he was like, hey, you're being piece of.

[Donut Operator]

You know those.

[Eli Double Tap]

This, like during the Brad Pitt movie.

[JD Delay]

Fury.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Was it during Fury, babe?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, that's when they were all together.

[JD Delay]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Shy, Him, Brad Pitt and the other guy that survived Fury.

[JD Delay]

I know he helped him later, and then he had him on the podcast. Yeah, that's when Shia LaBeouf also talks about, like, being a piece of. He's like, yeah, I had an ego my childhood, blah, blah, blah. I start taking accountability for.

[Donut Operator]

Well, he.

[JD Delay]

That was.

[Donut Operator]

You guys know, Tom Hardy is terrified of Shia LaBeouf. And Tom Hardy's a big dude and he plays badasses. You know what I'm saying?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's. Why is he afraid of Shia LaBeouf?

[Donut Operator]

So they did that movie Lawless, that was about the Bonder up. Bond Brothers.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

And I guess Shia LaBeouf flipped out on him and came very close to attacking him. And Tom Hardy is just like, I don't with that dude. That dude freaks me out. I don't with that dude. He's like, I'll never be in another room with that dude. I don't like. We. We. We finished the movie, and outside of filming our scenes, I. I was not around him. I don't want him anywhere around me. He. He scares me. And I was like, watching this interview of this dude who's, like, plays badass like, you're bane, bro. You're not allowed to be afraid of little men.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's also, like, a bjj. Like, yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

I think he's a brown belt.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's brown. I think that's what it is.

[JD Delay]

He fights a lot.

[Donut Operator]

What is that new?

[Eli Double Tap]

That's one of the. The funniest people I've ever met in my life. Like, I. I would think.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

See that one? Yeah. Drop that one.

[Donut Operator]

Crazy. He's been doing it to me for the last two days straight, and I've been letting it slide, dropping all these names. I had to do at least one.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Let me tell you.

[Donut Operator]

That was comedy perfection, because I was. I was gonna do it. I was gonna do it, and he said were looking over, and we both just looked over. That was perfect. I just thought you were looking at my dick again, bro.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Not again.

[Eli Double Tap]

Also, all of you.

[Donut Operator]

We love you. Cody.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That was perfect timing.

[Donut Operator]

The two of us just. Oh, so good. What is that new show that. That Tom is in? That's the. The British gangster show. If you guys watch Pierce Brosnan and. Yeah, if you guys haven't watched that, watch that. Good.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah. The gentleman.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, I haven't watched it. I should watch it.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, I haven't watched that one. Oh, just real quick. So. Consequences for breaking rules. Prisoners may lose visitation rights, personal belongings access, access to the prison store and work assignments. Serious or repeated infractions lead to placement in a punishment cell.

[Donut Operator]

Is that Japan?

[JD Delay]

Yeah. I don't know what a punishment cell is.

[Donut Operator]

Well, it's like the hole, bro. It's solitary.

[JD Delay]

Call it the punishment hole. And this is harsh conditions and limited contact.

[Eli Double Tap]

Be like, you got to go watch the outsider.

[Donut Operator]

Tony knows a lot about the punishment.

[Eli Double Tap]

Cool.

[JD Delay]

That one. I. Yeah. And it's after World War II.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

Okay, I'll watch that one.

[Eli Double Tap]

So he. He's a soldier that. That gets arrested in Japan, and it's. It's kind of cool.

[JD Delay]

I watch that one. Later, babe. Put it on the List.

[Donut Operator]

List. When you are in like boot camp or the army, like whatever the case may be, what are the punishments? If you up there, do they have like solitary confinement? Do they have like loss of privilege?

[JD Delay]

If you go to privileges, your article 15s, you'll get punished. You have like seven day, 14 day and 30 to 60 day.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Right.

[Donut Operator]

So what, what is it? What does it entail? When you get lop, do they call it lop? Loss of privilege.

[JD Delay]

No.

[Donut Operator]

Is in prison. So they have different.

[JD Delay]

You have jail. Army jail, which is you up. Yeah, army jails.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

But that's actually army jail is a very good.

[Donut Operator]

If you actually break a law.

[JD Delay]

Yes. That's big rock to big rock to little rock. You are doing manual labor.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. So like, like in prison, there's, there's different procedures that you could do. Like outside of solitary confinement. Solitary confinement blows, bro. It sucks. But it's absolutely necessary because there are genuinely evil people in there doing genuinely evil shit. So, like, I'm not complaining. I went to solitary multiple times. I deserved it. I every time. Accountability, yada, yada, yada. But like, they also have, if it's a lower level infraction, they give you loss of privilege. They call it lop and that you have to sit on your bunk and you, you can only leave your bunk if you have to go to the bathroom or if you're going to a. A call out where they have you like going to an appointment or if you are going to chow, other than that, you're sitting on your bunk the entire time. If you're in a dorm, you're in your cell the entire time. If you're in a cell block type situation, God, time would go so slow. It does go super slow. I've. I've done a little bit of time on lop for sure. And so sometimes they'll do like a step down where you do like, you know, four months in the hole and then you do three months on lop afterwards. And so you're like, it feels like absolute freedom. You're like, I'm not in a solitary confinement. I'm in a normal cell and I'm allowed to have my top raw woman and read books that aren't the Bible. This is the best thing ever, guys.

[JD Delay]

Oh, yeah.

[Donut Operator]

Imagine spending months in a time in just a cement room with a bed and a toilet that has a sink on top and all you can read is the Bible. And they bring you like the old King James and you're like, oh, another good movie.

[Eli Double Tap]

Count of Monte Cristo.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, yeah. This is great. It's one of my favorite books. Yeah, it's solid, dude.

[Eli Double Tap]

Fantastic book. And also we read.

[Donut Operator]

Nice.

[JD Delay]

A good movie. It's one of my. That is such a good movie.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

We need to watch the.

[Donut Operator]

Not.

[Eli Double Tap]

Not the. Like, the old one's.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Really good. Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Henry Cav. Young Henry Caval. Yeah.

[JD Delay]

He's the son.

[Donut Operator]

Really? Well.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, the. The. The bastard son that ends up, like, being his.

[JD Delay]

Like, the prisoner son for the. It's his son. The main character's son that had Adam.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Little age.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. She. What's it.

[Donut Operator]

What's.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

What's his woman's name? Oh, my gosh. I'm blanking on it. It's been a couple years since I last read it. Not Valentine.

[Eli Double Tap]

You've seen the movie, though?

[Donut Operator]

Well, I've read the book.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Like, I've read the book several times. I haven't seen the movie.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, but he plays.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He plays Little H.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, my gosh.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He plays the Count of Monte Cristo's lover. His. His love son, right. From the marriage that.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Happened after he was sent away from the bastard the. That sent him away to prison to get rid of him so that he can marry the girl. Okay. Yeah. At the end of the book, he's basically just, hey, go on a ship and figure your life out. Like, I did. Come back and maybe you can have some money.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah. He spends. What made me think of that is he, like. J.D. was talking about being in, like, solitary confinement in the movie. He's. I think he spends, what, 10 years with nothing in his cell.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

The count. Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

And then he. Then he meets the guy in the cell next to him. His celly.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, because the cellie goes to the wrong hole.

[Donut Operator]

He's like, oh, man, I've gone to the wrong.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, his cell.

[Donut Operator]

He was trying. Tony.

[Eli Double Tap]

His cell. He was trying to tunnel out the other way, and he accidentally ends up in his cell. And so he's freaked out.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's like, what the.

[Eli Double Tap]

This dude just tunnels up through his cell.

[JD Delay]

Old guy.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, but he. He spent, like. It was like 10 to 15 years there just looking at a wall, like, with nothing.

[JD Delay]

Then they start teaching me reading, writing, how to fight, all that.

[Eli Double Tap]

Such a good movie, man. It's such an underrated movie that no one watches anymore.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

In the book, it's the kind of Monte Cristo actually meets his. The guy that teaches him what to do because he. They, like, talk through, like, a hole in the wall. Like, there's, like, a hole, and they, like, start talking after a while. And Aisle, he's like, they're both basically political prisoners for no reason. And then the Count, who's not the Count at the time, but he digs to through the wall or digs another hole to get to his buddies adjoining cell. Then he teaches him everything. During that time, they also. He assists him in burrowing out. But then what ends up happening is he has like a big seizure and he's just like, I'm not for this world. Like they're gonna kill him. Like, I'm gonna die. Figure. Figure it out, bud. Try to, try to save yourself. He's like, okay. So he dies, you know, in. In the Count's arms. The Count's like my friend, but then is also like, I can use this. And then they take the guy, they put him in like ship lap and they like tie it up and they're just gonna throw him off the rock island.

[Eli Double Tap]

And he pretends like he's.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He's the corpse, changes himself with the corpse and throws the corpse in his room and gets thrown off and then mixes millions of billions of dollars.

[JD Delay]

That's still like the. The movie then.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Because that's still how that. One of my favorite parts of the book is the Count of Monte Cristo was just like, how long is the travel to so and so's place? A day and a half. Then I shall take my slumber pills. And he. And like it's described as. He pulls out a sapphire that's like bigger than his palm that he had hollowed out, that he just like flicks an opening for it. There's a bunch of sleeping pills in it. So the counts like so loaded. He's like, ah, a sapphire the size.

[Donut Operator]

Of a golf ball.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Hollow it out.

[Donut Operator]

Just carve it out so I can.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Put my pills in it.

[JD Delay]

I mean, he's in that movie when he buys the fucking estate.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

He's like, this is not for sale. He's like, man, it's a one treasure chest out of like 15. The guy's like, okay, it's. It's yours. And he comes in on a balloon.

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, yeah. In the movie. Yeah.

[JD Delay]

He comes in and hot air balloon.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yes.

[Eli Double Tap]

What kills me is everyone the entire movie, like, he keeps talking to people and they're like, how do you know this? He's like, well, Napoleon told me that.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

Napoleon Bonaparte told you that? He's like, yeah. And no one believes him the entire time. He's like, no, actually happened.

[Donut Operator]

Got it. So cool. Napoleon. Oh no.

[JD Delay]

Name dropping.

[Donut Operator]

Napoleon Cristo dropping.

[JD Delay]

I might know a dude or dude.

[Donut Operator]

So that. That actually holds up. Cuz even today they're still. They talk through vents in the wall. Yeah, in there. That's what's happening right now to Brian Coburger. He's in solitary confinement. But everyone around him. The dude who killed those four. College, Idaho. In Idaho.

[Eli Double Tap]

Oh, that.

[Donut Operator]

He broke into a house, a sorority house, and murdered these little girls while they were asleep.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Three girls. Boyfriend.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. And so he thought he was some genius, like master level dude. Nobody is. We still. Nobody has any idea why he chose them as victims. He refused to tell. He's just a weird, narcissistic, crazy dude. Like all these bitches on the Internet be like, my ex is a narcissist. You wouldn't be on the Internet saying that if he was. Cuz he would kill you. Calm down, Becky. But this dude's like that real life dude and he's a tiny man inside.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I thought he was tall.

[Donut Operator]

I thought he was tall. No, but I mean on the inside.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Oh, like he's small on the inside. Yeah.

[Donut Operator]

Those. Those victim impact panels with the families of those girls, particularly the sister and the mom. Like that sister must be a therapist or a psychologist because the things she said to that dude. Dude. Like she did a psychological workup on this dude and just degraded him in the most effective I've ever seen in a courtroom. I was gasping. I was like, yes, get him.

[Eli Double Tap]

Question for you. How do they treat someone like that in prison?

[Donut Operator]

Because I hate them, bro. They're torturing him right now. They can't get to him physically. So yeah, they're through the vents. They're keeping him up all hours of the night. They're literally. People are working shifts to keep him up, up. And they're. They're telling them what's going to happen to them. They're telling them, you know, as soon as we can get our hands on you, we're gonna. You with a splintered broomstick, we're gonna stab you, we're gonna kill you. And they're just. They're mentally and psychologically torturing them, which is what you do when you can't get your hands on a person. I was in the hole for a while and they put me next to a child and I had literally nothing to do. So I made it my wife's mission to try to get this dude to hang it up.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Up.

[Donut Operator]

I wanted him to. Epstein. Right. So I tried.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

He tried to influence him.

[Donut Operator]

I'm doing like influencing. I'm doing like little kids voices at him. And like, why'd you take my childhood away? Like, just non stop 24 7, going at this dude through the vents, this dude up, bro. And. And then eventually I got to where, like, I'm like, you know what's going to happen when you get out of here, man? Like, it's. It's going to be bad. Like, look, I'm being a friend here. You just. You should just end it, bro. You should just end it. And he tried and it up. And the guards, the COs found him trying and they took him to a butt nakey cell for 72 hours. All they do. If they. If you try to. If, like, if you go to a guard in there, a co, and you tell them, man, I'm just having this ideation and I'm really struggling mentally. I really need some help. They're like, cool, we got you cuff up and they take you to a cell where they strip you butt naked. And there's nothing in your cell except a camera pointing at you. And they keep you there for observation for three days. And then they're like, okay, cool, you're better. And they brought them right back to the cell next to me again. I was like, lit. I'm gonna get right back to it, dude.

[Eli Double Tap]

You know what that makes me think of? Have you watched the Matthew McConaughey True Detective? Yeah, Remember we. He's sitting, he's talking to the woman. He's like, you should just yourself. Yeah, the first opportunity you have, just yourself.

[Donut Operator]

You do a great Matthew McConaughey.

[Eli Double Tap]

Do you guys know how to talk like Matthew McConaughey?

[Donut Operator]

No, dude, do I need benzos?

[Eli Double Tap]

Okay, so you don't touch your teeth with your tongue.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

You don't. Oh, my God.

[JD Delay]

Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

I did a soft country accent and then. And then I didn't.

[Donut Operator]

Getting older and they just stay the same age. Age.

[Eli Double Tap]

You should just. Your show.

[Donut Operator]

I started watching that. That's Woody Haron, right? That's mccon and Woody Harrelson, right?

[Eli Double Tap]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[JD Delay]

Oh, watch that. The first season, Skip the second season.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Skip all of them. You said last time. Just the first one was good.

[Eli Double Tap]

The first one's amazing.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

The female one was okay, but the other two fell way short. Sword.

[JD Delay]

Yes.

[Donut Operator]

He actually.

[Eli Double Tap]

Matthew McConaughey's character reminds me of you kind of in that first one.

[JD Delay]

Well, all right. He just drinks the beer and it's all, oh, I can't say anything because he even watched it.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah, you'll binge watch. It's very good.

[Donut Operator]

Yes.

[JD Delay]

There's a couple ones we need to Watch.

[Eli Double Tap]

Do you know who taught me how to do the Matthew McConaughey voice? It was a. It was a. A congressman that taught me how to do. You guys. You guys are.

[Donut Operator]

I still haven't caught up to you doing it to me yet, but I'm an. Was his name Tony? We can name drop Tony without doing that to each other's like.

[JD Delay]

This is why I'm not talking right now.

[Eli Double Tap]

Everyone's like, why doesn't Cody talk? This is exactly why I bully Ethan.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

10 times more than you get bullied on this thing. And Ethan doesn't shut the up. So you can absolutely talk more. It's just a mind over matter thing.

[Donut Operator]

So I like. I don't. I don't. I'm not making this claim myself, but sources have said that Tony actually has a prolapsed anus that looks like a meat sock, bro. And that he can actually golf with it. That it hangs so low, though, like, I'm not sure if that's true. Sources. Sources have.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Sources have said that his prolapsed anus looks like a carp's mouth.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[JD Delay]

The face, please.

[Donut Operator]

Of golf with it.

[JD Delay]

That made it way worse. Rich is like a car snuff. Yeah.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Just imagine a cop's mouth, like, extending like intestine and then picking up a golf ball and then like, swallowing it up into the.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah.

[Eli Double Tap]

He calls it his little rogue rose.

[Donut Operator]

Oh, God.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

That's why I can't drink Four Roses.

[JD Delay]

That's the reason.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. I went to a scary mirror thing at a. At a carnival, and Tony pulled down his pants and I saw Four Roses.

[Donut Operator]

Hey, speaking of which, have you guys ever looked at your own.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

As very little as possible.

[Donut Operator]

But have you. Have you ever seen it? I realized that's the one part of my body I'd never seen is my Gucci. My.

[JD Delay]

So literally just talked about. It's like the worst.

[Donut Operator]

Did you.

[JD Delay]

To last episode. We started with being the worst thing to look at possible.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

It is the worst of God's creation is a man's butthole.

[Donut Operator]

I looked at my own, bro. I literally, like, I put a mirror on the floor and I heard this before popped the squat. I got the right angle. Don't ever do that, by the way. I've not been the same man since.

[JD Delay]

Yeah, it's.

[Donut Operator]

It's not a good thing.

[JD Delay]

God, this is.

[Donut Operator]

Okay. I didn't realize you guys had just talked about this. No, I was just speaking for personal experience.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

If you bend over and look at it, like, spread your cheeks and look at it from, like, in the bathroom mirror, you'll get an idea of what it's like to be Tony Gonzalez.

[Donut Operator]

Yeah. Or a correctional officer.

[JD Delay]

I've told this story before.

[Eli Double Tap]

I think, guys, the Count of Money Cristo is a great movie.

[JD Delay]

Thank you.

[Donut Operator]

Thank you.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

There could be in it too.

[Donut Operator]

Whoa.

[JD Delay]

Well, okay, so I went to. This is what a couple years ago, I went to Scare, and he went to the restroom. I was like, oh, bow surprise, autistic kid. So I went to the bedroom, and I was like, I'll cover myself up in a sheet. And I'll, like, he made a mess. So I, like, covered myself in the sheet, and I hear him walk in the room. He's like, okay, I'll wait for the tablet to turn on, and then I'll bah. And I'm waiting like, okay, I think he came. I don't. Maybe he didn't come in. I swore I heard him walking. No tablet, though, huh? And I go like this, and I, like, lift my shit up. I'm like, what? And he has pulled the mirror out. No, it was his tablet, and he had the camera on reverse, and he was squatting over it, looking at his butthole. I was like, what the fuck? And he's like, oh, why are you in here? No shame. I was like, what are you.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

No.

[Donut Operator]

Huh? Not turning the table. What are you doing?

[JD Delay]

He's like, making sure my butthole is clean. Clean. It's like, daddy can't be mad.

[Donut Operator]

I was like, no, that's proper hygiene, I guess.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Are you.

[Donut Operator]

Don't leave now.

[JD Delay]

Brother walked out of the room. I love him so much.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Did you not need to know about your cleaning ritual?

[JD Delay]

Nope, I did not.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

But I also didn't have to break strike into your room to try and scare you.

[Donut Operator]

It's kind of a wash right there.

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Yeah. Quid pro quo, Batman.

[Eli Double Tap]

Dude, my. My mom caught my brother trying to fart on a candle one time.

[Donut Operator]

Just. Okay.

[Eli Double Tap]

She walked into a room and, like, he had a candle up to it. Like, right up to his. He's probably like, 11.

[JD Delay]

What are you doing?

[Eli Double Tap]

What are you doing?

[Rich (Angry Cops)]

Trying to solder this thing closed, Mom.

[JD Delay]

Trying to get that fire, I think. On that note, Cody, you can close us out.

[Eli Double Tap]

Bye, everyone. Thank you for joining the unsubscribed podcast. I was joined by Eli Double Tap, Angry Cops, JD Delay, myself, Donut Operator. Thank you guys for hanging out.

[JD Delay]

We love you.

[Donut Operator]

It's all very sexual. Tony.

[JD Delay]

You.

[Donut Operator]

Tony.